#and possibly failing miserably

[whumpshaped]

thinking about whumpee who just wants to engage in freaky funtime. they've gone through the horrors and they never want to go through them ever again- but being afraid is so very fun and they're badgering caretaker for it endlessly. but whenever caretaker demonstrates any willingness, whumpee immediately goes "but it'd just be play, right? it'd be pretend?" making caretaker think that maybe it's just not a good idea. whumpee just seems so anxious. it's like they love the idea of it, but any talk of execution makes them recoil.

still, they eventually work out an arrangement. whumpee is jittery as ever, testing out the safeword a thousand times to see whether caretaker would really stop. they say it before and after caretaker is finished tying them to the chair, they ask "but it's all pretend, yeah? you're not mean for real? it's all bluffs?" another hundred times, then they follow it up with "no, i do want this, i do, i just wanna make sure it's not too scary, or real"

and then caretaker gets into the rhythm, and whumpee is immediately captivated. all that nervous energy that should absolutely be there during play like this just vanishes almost without a trace. whumpee looks the calmest they've looked in a long while, and caretaker can barely believe that someone can be this calm watching them play with a knife and throw out threats

[swiggity-swexual-i-am-asexual]

Danny Fenton, aka Phantom, has been given a new task!

In short, literally no one in the Ghost Zone/Infinite Realms wants their mostly peaceful afterlife to be rocked by a certain Gotham rogue named Joker. Which, when he dies, is almost sure to happen because of whatever the hell was in that vat he dropped in included ectoplasm. So, yay, he’s also a little ghostly too, meaning he *is* pretty hard to kill. Unfortunately, there’s also a certain vigilante that is quite keen to murder him in recent years.

So now Danny has to keep the mass murderer trauma clown alive for as long as he possibly can while attempting to keep the Joker from. Well. Being the Joker.

Oh, and naturally, Danny got this assignment AFTER Joker got out of Arkham. Again. And entirely blew up the asylum. Time to join the Goonion, he is NOT doing this without getting PAID, thank you.

[roxannepolice]

Speaking of the Master or thoschei and 70-80s rock, I again have to make it clear just how freaking much Pink Floyd's Wish you were here album fits these two freaks. Like, The Wall, the story of a sensitive man turning into a fascist leader because the safest place you can be is behind your wall, that's the Master's ultimate album. But Wish you were here? with its sorrow and longing for a connection in a lonely crowd, inspired by the friend you watched collapsing into madness while you chose your own path? That's just too insanely freaking fitting. Like, fuck's sake, tell me this is not the summary of everything the Doctor tries to tell the Master:

Remember when you were young, you shone like the sun (You could be so much more. You could be beautiful). Shine on you crazy diamond. Now there's a look in your eyes, like black holes in the sky (fuck's sake RTD you could have given the Master ANY scary sounding toy but you went with BLACK HOLE CONVERTER, as, in the largest stars collapsing in on their own gravity and creating goddamns rifts in time and space that we just figured out must be there even if they mean God is indeed playing dice). Shine on you crazy diamond. You were caught on the crossfire of childhood and stardom, Blown on the steel breeze. [...]

You reached for the secret too soon, you cried for the moon. Shine on you crazy diamond. Threatened by shadows at night, and exposed in the light. Shine on you crazy diamond.

Well you wore out your welcome with random precision, Rode on the steel breeze. Come on you raver, you seer of visions, Come on you painter, you piper, you prisoner, and shine! [...]

And we'll bask in the shadow of yesterday's triumph (remember the Axons? And the Daleks!), sail on the steel breeze. Come on you boy child, you winner and loser, come on you miner for truth and delusion, and shine

and on the other hand,

And did they get you to trade Your heroes for ghosts? Hot ashes for trees? Hot air for a cool breeze? Cold comfort for change? And did you exchange A walk on part in the war For a lead role in a cage? (tell me this isn't what the Master did when he ran away from the time war and instead tried to create the new Time Lord empire

How I wish, how I wish you were here. We’re just two lost souls Swimming in a fish bowl, Year after year, Running over the same old ground. What have we found? The same old fears. Wish you were here.

Here's the full album on YouTube and also for your gazing pleasures two men shaking hands while one of them is freaking on fire

[canisalbus]

Role-reversal AU where Machete opens a library on Florence and slowly becomes a very influencial local political figure, while Vasco's parents become fed-up with his "lifestyle" and send him away to the clergy (he probably has a brother in this AU, to make their decision more believable)

They reconnect in a similar way to the original, but their relationship is much more tragic as Vasco became self-hating and thinks he corrupted/doomed Machete in their youth and meanwhile, this Machete is trying to protect him from the corrupted side of the Church and possible assassination plot, that he's too indoctrinated to see happening around him

A interesting ending for this AU should be that Machete still dies, but results in Vasco finally running away from the clergy/inquisition (not sure if Vasco joins the inquisition or not, you can decide) and hiding in the country-side. Where he grows old dedicating various paintings and poems to Machete and possibly taking care of some noble's horses for a living

.

[cable-salamdr]

I will make that cake btw, probably next week on Wednesday or Friday so I actually have time lmao

[wormchaser]

you are complaining about complaining too much while complaining about the fact that maybe people dont like you because you complain too much while complaining about being alone. just stop complaining and do something about it. talk to people. reach out. dont just wait for someone to come to you first.

i have tried reaching out to different people in the past year or so but it never works. i understand its my own fault for letting relationships decay because of my own insecurities and issues but that doesn't mean i can just will myself to think or believe different things about myself. it's a self fulfilling prophecy ; i think people don't like me so i don't reach out so people don't like me etc . i am sure you do not want to hear me list all the things i want to say in response so i will put them in the tags.

[umbrellajam]

caught myself thinking "hmmm I do enjoy...... (no, not eating. uh. 🤔) .....satiating hunger" upon consuming sustenance for the first time today

which. firstly: lol self. and secondly: "satiating hunger" what are you a vampire? wtf self

ok question for y'all just out of curiosity:

[potatounicoorn]

Ducktales 2017 ran so all Disney reboots could fall flat on their faces.

[wanderinghedgehog]

Sometimes Les Mis being a musical is really funny to me because it leads to these really weird scenes that only make sense in a musical. My favorite of these has got to be near the end of Who Am I when Valjean gets to the trial. Of course Javert has to be there so there doesn’t have to be a separate scene of a messenger telling him about Valjean. But that means that he’s literally just there to observe. He can’t do ANYTHING. While Valjean is singing the really long note at the end of the song, Javert just has to politely wait until the singing is done. Even then, when Valjean runs off, Javert can’t immediately chase after him because then how would Valjean get to Fantine’s death scene with so much time to spare. It’s so silly.

[tragicotps]

Young Masriel au [part 6: the green-eyed monster]: in which Marisa gets jealous over Asriel meeting with certain witches in the North and tries to make him look bad in front of her husband. Unfortunately, and to Marisa's surprise, Asriel has been paying attention and likes to play this game as much as she does. He should've anticipated she'd be angry about this. Completely hypocritical of course, since she's the one that's married here. First she couldn't get rid of him fast enough, and now she's acting as if he put her through the worst betrayal imaginable. If she wants to play dirty though, he's more than willing to participate. He's been watching her when she thinks no one is looking. Her daemon straying uncomfortably far from her at times, testing his boundaries. If there are any, that is. she never even flinches. Anyone else would be appalled by the very idea, but he's just fascinated by the science of it. The Northern witches, their magical abilities and way of life have always intrigued him. Marisa seems to be less impressed. Asriel would be lying if he said he doesn't enjoy the look on her face when she realises he knows about her little secret.

(part 1/ part 2/ part 3/ part 4/ part 5)

[valgeristik]

ok so this isnt exactly my usual brand of art but like. SPECIAL CIRCUMSTANCES: I MADE A DRESS myself. from scratch. behold!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It was wild bcs i got GRIPPED by insanity for like a week n would not stop working on this thing. ive never sewed clothes before. i do believe i may have been possessed, big huge thanks to my bestiest bestie @blu3mila for being the photographer 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

[horsemage]

Sometimes I really wonder if I should have just coughed up the fucking money to stay on campus for the winter

[pa-pa-plasma]

kind of frustrating that people took "fat does not equal unhealthy" to mean "fat is not unhealthy." sometimes being obese IS unhealthy & excess fat can cause a lot of problems. ignoring health issues isn't progressive. real "oranges kill people with depression" moment

[marbleboa]

Having a bunch of Koyama thoughts, particularly about the early part of his and the other Scars' redemption arcs following the disbanding of their division. As fun as it would be to write a fic about it I definitely don't have the time to do so, so! Text post it is.

When I was first watching S2, seeing Koyama among the group of former Scars who were trying to put their lives back together definitely surprised me a little. "The Scars did shitty things" is a given, but when it comes to Koyama I feel like his wrongdoings are more...personal to a lot of the audience, if that makes sense. His fight with Mob--if you could even call it that--had this drawn out, visceral brutality to it that I don't think any of the Scars replicated, except maybe Muto. If Koyama got his ass kicked during the end of S1 and went poof along with said Chin Man and Miyagawa, I wouldn't have been surprised.

Don't get me wrong, I love where his arc ended up, and I think the Scars' stories fall in well with the messages the show was trying to convey. That change in him feels like a big leap to make, though, so it's been fun to try to fill in the gap. I'd imagine that transition period after the fall of the 7th division must've been...pretty messy(gonna ramble more about this under the cut)

The blanket explanation the Scars gave was how being beaten by a bunch of kids snapped them out of their flawed way of viewing the world, which makes sense—for the majority of them, anyway. But Koyama wasn’t around for the Great Reigen Roast of 2012–you could say the same for Terada, Takeuchi and Tsuchiya as well, but while all the Scars have been characterized with a certain immaturity towards society and the like, Koyama’s blaring faults directly clash against any kind of progression.

He’s the school bully that gets in trouble and only resolves to get revenge, that one little kid who’d refuse to ‘lose’ when playing make believe by coming up with all sorts of excuses. Judging by the way he’d lash out at any sign of his strength being questioned…I don’t think his pride would’ve let him have that swift moment of clarity like the others(even after being turned into a human ping pong ball by a middle schooler). Far from it as you could go, in fact—that humiliation would only make him double down. Not that the other Scars aren't drastically affected by the whole thing, of course, but Koyama…Koyama’s a prime candidate for making his frustration everyone else’s problem.

Hell I could even see him getting it into his dumbass head that he could find a place in Claw again if he just took down the ones that put an end to the 7th division. His fellow Scars who failed—well they just didn’t have the grit to fight their way past this setback, lost their teeth, but not him. He thinks he could succeed where they failed, and rise back to the top. Shallow as hell plan, painfully desperate, but it’s all he has now. I’m sure that would go sooooo well for him, especially when the rest of the Scars find out what he’s up to while they’ve been trying to fix their lives. Lmao.

[steviescrystals]

i seriously need to get a new job and start making money again asap bc i cannot keep living at home much longer it’s driving me insane

(wrote an entire essay in the tags without meaning to oops)