#and now things are so much better so wonderful honestly

[paigesluver]

for me? | chapter_1

paige bueckers x fem reader

synopsis; you and paige share unspoken feelings for each other, resulting in an escalating tension that complicates your friendship and challenges your emotions

warnings; sexual tension, emotional conflict

hi hi! this is the first chapter and it took me so long to be happy with the outcome. i hope everyone enjoys it and let me know what you think!

Waking up at eight in the morning was part of your daily routine. As the director of the media team at UConn, you had a lot on your plate: ensuring everyone had their assignments for upcoming practices and games, approving various media, scheduling everything meticulously, and preparing for interviews and conferences. You loved the hustle. At just twenty-three, you were already one of the most dedicated directors, a title you’d earned after starting out as an interviewer and photographer.

After finishing your morning routine, you laced up your shoes, grabbed your keys, and tossed your laptop into your backpack. You gave your apartment a quick glance before locking the door and heading to your car. 

A few minutes later, you pulled into the parking lot of the basketball facility, you slid on your headphones and grabbed your key card to enter the building. Typically, you were the first one in, but as you passed the basketball court, you heard the unmistakable sound of squeaking sneakers. Curious, you paused and spotted a blonde ponytail in motion. You walked backward until you reached the glass windows, peering inside. There she was—Paige Bueckers, effortlessly sinking shots from way beyond the three-point line with the kind of ease most people could only dream of.

You walked back to the nearest door, slipped inside, and made your way to the court. As you approached, Paige’s voice rang out. “I was wondering when you’d show up,” she said, watching the ball swoosh through the net before turning to face you. 

“How did you even know it was me?” you asked, tilting your head with a smile. 

“You’re the only one crazy enough to be here this early,” she said, chuckling. “And look who’s here.” She pointed at you with a smirk. 

“You’re here, aren’t you?” you shot back. “Touche,” Paige said while you laughed, shaking your head as you jogged over to meet her. “You really have a thing for calling me out.”

Paige shrugged, giving you a playful wink. “Hey, someone has to keep you on your toes.”

You exchanged a quick dap, but before you could fully pull away, Paige wrapped her arms around your waist in a sudden hug. The warmth of her caught you off guard, and for a second, you just stood there, soaking it in.

“I missed you,” she said, her voice quieter than usual, though still full of that familiar playfulness.

You chuckled softly. “Alright, you got me. I missed you too.”

She pulled back just enough to look you in the eye, her mischievous grin back in place. “So, what’s the plan? Are you ready to show me up on the court, or are you just going to stand around being all cute?”

You glanced down at your watch. “As much as I’d love to stay and shoot hoops with you, I’ve got a million things to do today.”

“Right,” Paige said with an exaggerated eye roll. “The director’s got to direct. You’ve got all that important work to do, don’t you?”

“I do,” you said, feigning seriousness. “But don’t worry, I’ll make it back later. Might even grab some footage of you practicing... just because.”

Paige raised an eyebrow and shot you a teasing look. “Oh, so I’m your muse now? Better get my best side.”

“Always,” you replied with a smirk. “But honestly, every side’s the best side.”

She laughed, tossing her head back, her ponytail swaying. “Smooth talker. Alright, director, go do your thing or whatever.”

You waved as you turned to head out. “I’ll be back. Don’t miss me too much.”

As you walked toward your office, the light in your chest made it hard to wipe the grin off your face. Not just because of the work that lay ahead, but because you’d been lucky enough to get a little piece of something special every time you spent time with Paige.

You settled into your office, finally diving into the mountain of emails that had piled up overnight. The routine of work—scheduling, approving media, prepping for upcoming games—helped keep your mind from wandering too much. You focused on the tasks at hand, pushing away any stray thoughts of the court, of Paige, of the way her laugh echoed in your mind long after she was gone.

The hours passed, and your stomach rumbled around noon, reminding you that you’d barely eaten. You grabbed a protein bar from your drawer and got back to work, responding to emails and crossing off one to-do after another. Between finalizing the schedule for an upcoming game and reviewing media coverage, you barely noticed the time slipping by.

Around 2 p.m., your phone buzzed on the desk. You reached for it absently, expecting another work-related message. Instead, it was a text from Kaia: hey, want to hang out tonight? maybe grab dinner or watch something?

You stared at the message for a long moment, your finger hovering over the screen. Kaia had been sweet to you, and you liked her—really liked her—but things had felt different since that night at the bar. That night with Paige. The tension that had simmered between you two, that casual teasing... it had unsettled you in a way you hadn’t expected.

You couldn’t deny it any longer: something was shifting between you and Paige, and you couldn’t ignore it. And yet, here was Kaia, reaching out with the kind of ease you wished you could feel.

But you knew you couldn’t go out with her tonight—not with the feelings you were trying to suppress, not with the way your mind kept circling back to Paige. You didn’t want to lead Kaia on when your heart wasn’t entirely in it. And you definitely didn’t want to be unfair to her. She deserves someone who could give her their full attention, not someone who was tangled up in confusion.

You set the phone down without replying, forcing yourself to focus back on the work in front of you. But the knot in your stomach remained. You weren’t sure if it was guilt for ignoring Kaia’s invitation or the unresolved tension that still lingered in your chest every time you thought about Paige.

The clock ticked on, and you tried to push both thoughts aside as you finished up the last of your tasks. Just as you were about to close your laptop, your door creaked open.

"Hey, director," Paige’s voice called out, light and familiar. You looked up, and there she was, leaning against the doorframe with that grin of hers—the one that always made your pulse pick up a little too fast.

“Busy?” she asked, arching an eyebrow as she stepped inside.

You smiled, leaning back in your chair. "Not at the moment. What’s up?"

Paige walked further into the room, the scent of something delicious filling the air as she set the bag down on your desk. “Thought I’d check in on you. And, y’know, bring you something to eat. You’ve been working through lunch again, haven’t you?”

You raised an eyebrow, surprised. “You didn’t have to do that.”

“Too late, already did,” Paige grinned, pulling out a Caesar salad wrap, crispy fries, and your favorite passion fruit juice. “You’ve been stuck here all morning, so I thought you could use a little pick-me-up.”

You couldn’t help but smile at the gesture. “This is very sweet of you P, I was just starting to get hungry.”

“Figured as much,” she said, flopping down in the chair across from you. “I’ve been keeping an eye on you, making sure you don’t work yourself into the ground.”

You laughed, opening the bag and grabbing the wrap. “You’re spoiling me now, my favorite from Gansett’s? How’d you know?”

Paige leaned back, resting her arms behind her head casually. “We’ve known each other for a long time now, you think I wouldn’t know where one of your favorite meals is from?”

“Not a lot of people pay attention to things like that” You laughed, shaking your head.

Paige’s eyes twinkled with amusement. “Well good thing I’m not just anybody.”

You felt a strange flutter at her words, a mix of admiration and something else that was harder to pin down. She wasn’t wrong—she had a way of making you feel like she really saw you, and that made you feel… something more than just friends. You quickly brushed the thought aside, not sure you were ready to unpack it.

Paige laughed, but this time it was softer, like she caught the shift in the air between you two. She held your gaze a moment longer, her expression a little more serious than usual. “So… you’re still sticking to that ‘all work, no play’ routine? No chance of you coming out and having some fun tonight?”

You paused, considering. There it was again, that casual invitation. The kind of offer you would normally take without thinking. But with everything that was swirling inside you—feelings you couldn’t even begin to sort through—you couldn’t bring yourself to say yes.

“Actually, I was supposed to meet up with Kaia later,” you said, the words slipping out before you could stop them. A flicker of guilt washed over you. You hadn’t really planned anything with Kaia—you’d just ignored her text earlier. “But, uh, I think I’m going to go meet her after all. Just need to get out for a bit.”

Paige gave you a long look, her brow furrowing slightly. “Oh yeah? That’s a change. Haven’t seen you take a break in forever.”

You shrugged, trying to sound casual. “Yeah, figured I could use one.”

Paige didn’t press it, but the air between you felt a little heavier. She stood up, brushing off the hem of her hoodie, and gave you a smile, though it didn’t quite reach her eyes. “Well, don’t let me keep you. But if you ever want to ditch the routine, you know where to find me.”

"Thanks," you said, your voice quieter than you meant. "Maybe next time."

Paige paused at the door, glancing back at you with a look that you couldn’t quite read. “Yeah. Maybe next time.”

You watched her walk out, her footsteps fading down the hallway, and a strange knot tightened in your stomach.

Kaia’s message was still there on your phone, waiting to be answered. You were going to meet up with her, but something about it felt a little off now. The weight of Paige’s words and the tension in the air lingered, but you pushed it all aside for the moment.

You grabbed your phone and typed out a quick response to Kaia: 

hey! dinner sounds good, is Latina Cantina cool with you?

You hit send and tossed your phone back on the desk, hoping dinner would help take your mind off everything.

A couple of hours passed since Paige had dropped by your office. You buried yourself in work, crossing off to-dos and reviewing media, but your thoughts kept flickering between the tasks at hand and your conversation with Paige. Before you knew it, late afternoon had rolled around, and practice time was approaching. You decided it was about time to head over to the court to get some footage of the team.

Grabbing your camera gear—lenses, extra batteries, and your bag—you made your way toward the gym. The familiar sounds of practice greeted you as you approached: the squeak of sneakers, the bounce of basketballs, and the low hum of players in motion.

When you reached the court, you immediately spotted Paige. She was in the middle of a drill, her blonde ponytail swinging as she drained shots from beyond the three-point line with ease. You smiled to yourself, knowing you'd be in for some good footage today.

You pushed open the door to the gym, which creaked slightly as it swung wide. Paige turned her head and, as soon as she saw you, her face lit up. She waved you over with a grin, clearly enjoying herself.

“Look who finally decided to show up,” she said, tossing the ball up into the air, making another effortless shot. "I was starting to think you forgot about me."

You chuckled and adjusted your camera, walking over to her. “Busy doing responsible adult things, you know how it is,” you said with a smirk. “But I’m here now, and I’m ready to capture all your greatness.”

Paige shot you a teasing look. “Better get a good shot of me then,” she said, setting herself up for another shot. She launched the ball into the air, sinking it with ease. She turned toward you with a playful grin. “That’s one for the highlight reel, right?”

You snapped the picture, laughing. “Definitely.”

Paige ran to the other side of the court, getting back into position, and you quickly moved to adjust for the next shot. She continued to hit shot after shot, making it look effortless. With every successful basket, she’d glance back at you, pointing toward the camera as if to say, “That was for you.”

The entire team was in sync, their chemistry on full display as they went through drills, but Paige was in a class of her own. Her movements were smooth, controlled, and she made it all look easy. You kept snapping photos, capturing everything from her perfect form to her focused expressions.

After a few minutes, you decided to move around and get shots of the rest of the team. You greeted the players with high-fives and daps, snapping pictures as they got into their respective drills. Some of them flashed quick smiles for the camera, while others focused on their practice. You even took a moment to greet the coaches, giving them a wave and a nod before heading back to catch more action. The atmosphere was relaxed, but you could feel the energy in the air as the team worked together.

About an hour or two into practice, you decided to start wrapping up. The team had been working hard, and it seemed like a good time to pack up for the day. You took a last round of shots, then slung your camera bag over your shoulder.

As you headed for the door, Paige caught your eye once more, flashing that signature grin. “Don’t forget about me now,” she teased, tossing the ball to a teammate. “Make sure you get my best angles next time.”

You waved at her as you walked toward the exit. “I’ve got plenty of footage. Don’t worry,” you called back with a grin, feeling the weight of your day settling in.

As you stepped out of the gym, the sounds of practice fading behind you, you made your way to your car. You had done what you came to do, and now it was time to head home and get ready for your dinner with Kaia. The evening was calling, and though your mind was still half on the court, you knew you needed to focus on the night ahead.

Your phone buzzed again as you walked toward the exit. It was Kaia: “Latina Cantina works for me, see you there?”

You typed out a quick response, feeling the familiar pull of anticipation as you headed for your car.

“perfect, see you later.”

With everything wrapped up at the gym, the rest of your day fell into place. You were ready to unwind for the night, but that lingering feeling—thoughts of Paige—seemed to float just under the surface. It was hard to shake them off, but for now, you’d focus on getting ready for your date with Kaia. Tonight was about having fun.

You drove home, the familiar sights of the city passing by without much thought. The conversation with Kaia lingered, but so did Paige’s smile and the way her eyes had met yours with that unspoken hint of something more. You shook it off and focused on the night ahead. Kaia was sweet, and you liked her. You were determined to be present for her.

At home, you tossed your bag on the couch and started going through your closet. You wanted to look good without overthinking it. Something casual, but still special. You settled on a fitted jersey, leather pants, and your black Amina Muaddi heels. Comfortable yet stylish. After a quick glance in the mirror, you felt good enough to head out.

Before leaving, you took a couple of mirror pics, capturing the outfit just right. You checked your phone, made sure you had everything, and grabbed your keys.

Your phone buzzed again—it was a message from Kaia: i’m already here, can’t wait to see you!

You smiled, the familiar excitement bubbling up. You shot her a quick reply: omw now, see you soon, pretty girl.

The drive to Latina Cantina was short, and you found a spot right in front. Walking in, the warm scent of spices and sizzling food hit you instantly. You spotted Kaia almost immediately—sitting at a corner booth, scrolling through her phone, her easy smile lighting up when she saw you.

"Hey, you made it!" she said as she stood up, giving you a friendly hug. "Glad we could finally catch up."

You smiled, the tension from earlier slipping away. "Yeah, me too. It's been too long."

Kaia looked great, dressed in a soft, oversized sweater in a pastel shade, paired with a sleek mini skirt and chunky white sneakers. She completed the look with a simple silver necklace. The outfit was relaxed yet chic, and she pulled it off effortlessly. "You look amazing," you said, sitting down across from her.

"Thanks," Kaia smiled, her eyes twinkling. "I figured I’d dress up a little, hope I didn’t overdo it."

"Not at all," you said, grinning.

The night went smoothly—good food, easy conversation, and laughter. Kaia was warm and attentive, and though there were moments when your mind briefly wandered back to the gym, you quickly refocused. You didn’t want to spoil the night.

As you finished up dinner, Kaia leaned across the table, her eyes glinting with curiosity. "So, what's been going on with you lately? You’ve been a little... distracted."

You hesitated, your thoughts drifting back to Paige, but before you could respond, Kaia smiled playfully. "I’m just glad we’re hanging out tonight, no distractions, right?"

You chuckled, grateful for her easy-going nature. "Yeah, no distractions tonight. Just us."

The conversation flowed effortlessly after that. Kaia’s warmth and lightheartedness made it easy to be present. You talked about funny stories from work, what you both had been up to lately, and random bits of pop culture.

As the meal wound down, Kaia leaned back in her seat, a playful smile tugging at her lips. "So, what’s next on the agenda for you? I know you’ve got a lot going on."

You took a sip of your drink, considering. "Honestly? I just needed a night off. No work, no stress—just hanging out."

"Well, I’m glad you’re here," she said, her tone sincere. "We should do this more often."

You nodded, feeling a flicker of warmth. "Definitely. I’d like that."

For a moment, the two of you just sat there, the noise of the restaurant buzzing around you. There was something about this moment, about Kaia’s easy presence, that felt... right. You smiled, grateful for her patience, for how effortlessly she seemed to make everything feel comfortable.

The waiter brought the check, and after a few moments of back and forth, you split the bill. You both stood up, and Kaia pulled on her jacket as you followed her out of the booth. Walking toward the door, Kaia brushed her shoulder against yours, a playful grin on her face. "Same time next week?" she teased.

"Sounds like a plan," you said, your voice a little lighter than when you first walked in.

Outside, the cool night air greeted you both as you walked to your cars. Kaia stopped, turning to face you. “I had a really great time tonight. Thank you for coming out.”

You smiled. "Of course. I had a great time too. See you soon?"

She nodded, taking a step back. "Definitely."

As you drove home, the warmth of the evening stayed with you—Kaia’s laugh, her playful teasing, and the easy flow of conversation. But beneath that warmth, the thought of Paige lingered. The way she had looked at you earlier, the invitation to meet at the bar—it all kept running through your mind. You wondered what it would have been like if you’d gone.

You pulled into your apartment's garage, parking your car and taking a moment to sit in the quiet of the space. The night had been a whirlwind of emotions, but you couldn’t shake the pull toward Paige.

You glanced at your phone, the text to Kaia letting her know you made it home safely, but still no message from Paige. You stared at the screen, your thumb hovering over the phone, lost in thought. Without second-guessing, you grabbed your keys, unlocked the door, and stepped out of the car.

You ordered an Uber almost instinctively. There was no hesitation—this felt like the right thing to do.

The Uber ride flew by, the hum of the city at night drowning out your thoughts. The anticipation grew as you neared the bar. When you arrived, the noise hit you immediately—laughter, the clink of glasses, the hum of conversation. You made your way toward the bar, scanning the room for the bartender.

As you were about to order, you felt a presence behind you. "Amaretto sour, right?" Paige said, her tone playful yet confident.

You turned, surprised but smiling. "Exactly."

She ordered for you, adding, “And I’ll take a Shirley Temple. Can’t have you drinking alone.” Her hand brushed against your lower back as she guided you toward the team’s table. The warmth of it sent a rush through you, and you followed her, completely at ease.

As you reached the table, her teammates greeted you. Paige pulled out a chair and sat next to you, her eyes glinting with amusement.

"Glad you made it," she said softly, leaning in closer.

You smiled and settled in beside her. The night felt lighter now, the tension you’d carried throughout the evening melting away.

“I guess I’ve just had a lot on my mind lately,” you said, your voice quieter. “Been trying to figure some things out.”

Paige didn’t push further, but there was a knowing look in her eyes, like she understood. “It’s okay. You don’t have to have it all figured out. Sometimes you just have to let things play out, you know?”

You nodded, her words sinking in. “Yeah, I guess you’re right.”

The music in the background seemed to swell for a moment, and for a second, it felt like you were the only two people in the room. Paige’s gaze softened, and she leaned in a little closer, her shoulder brushing yours. It wasn’t obvious, but the closeness carried an undeniable charge, as if there was something deeper at play than mere friendly conversation.

“You’re a good person,” she said, the sincerity in her voice catching you off guard. “I can tell you’ve got a lot going on, but I’m glad you’re here. I’m glad you came tonight.”

The words hit you harder than you expected, and you found yourself smiling, feeling the weight of everything lift just a little. Maybe it was the alcohol, or maybe it was just the way Paige made everything feel easier, but in that moment, you felt a little more at peace.

“Thanks, Paige. That means a lot,” you said, your voice quieter now, more real than it had been all night.

She smiled, her eyes meeting yours. “Anytime.”

The night stretched on, but something had shifted. Whatever was lingering between you and Paige, whatever unspoken thing had been hanging in the air, it was finally starting to feel a little clearer. And for the first time that night, you were ready to let yourself just... be.

The night seemed to stretch on endlessly, the laughter of the bar around you becoming a distant hum as you and Paige found yourselves slipping into a quieter, more secluded area. The sounds of clinking glasses and chatter faded, leaving only the space between the two of you, thick with unspoken words and tension.

Paige stood close now, closer than before. The small distance that had once felt comfortable had dwindled to almost nothing, and you could feel the heat radiating off her, her presence impossible to ignore. Her eyes locked onto yours, an unreadable expression playing across her face as if she was waiting for something—waiting for you, or perhaps waiting for the right moment to make the first move.

You could feel her body heat, the subtle shift of her posture, her breath just a little quicker than usual. You couldn’t remember when exactly the conversation had stopped, but now, words felt unnecessary. All that was left was the tension—the tension that had been building from the moment you walked into the bar and locked eyes. It was suffocating, thrilling, and you weren’t sure whether it was the alcohol or the attraction, but you couldn’t deny it anymore. The pull was undeniable.

Your hand brushed against hers in the dim light, a touch so fleeting but loaded with meaning. Her gaze dropped to where your fingers hovered for a moment, then back up to your eyes, an almost imperceptible flicker of something—desire, maybe—flickering in her expression.

The air between you grew heavier, the silence stretching, each second pulling you closer to a decision, to a shift in the unspoken tension. But before either of you could take that final step, Paige moved first. She leaned in just enough to press a soft kiss to your lips, her touch gentle yet full of intention. It was a quiet moment that spoke louder than words ever could, the space between you both crackling with a charged energy that had been building all night. Her lips were warm against yours, hesitant at first, like she was testing the waters, but it only took a heartbeat for you to feel the pull between you deepen.

You didn’t hesitate. Your hand reached up instinctively to rest on her waist, drawing her closer as the kiss grew more urgent, more assured. Her lips parted slightly, just enough for your breaths to mingle, and you could feel her pulse quicken, her body pressing softly against yours. Everything around you seemed to fade—there was only the two of you, suspended in this moment where nothing else mattered but the way your lips moved together.

The world outside ceased to exist, the hum of the city and the dim glow of the streetlights blurring into the background. Her fingers found their way to your jaw, tracing along your skin with a featherlight touch, anchoring the both of you in this stolen moment. Each brush of her lips told a story—of longing, of unspoken feelings finally set free, of a connection too strong to deny.

The air between you seemed to hum with its own rhythm, matching the steady beat of your heart as you tilted your head slightly, deepening the kiss. Her breath hitched, and you could feel her relax into you, her body molding effortlessly against yours as though she’d always belonged there. The taste of her lingered, sweet and intoxicating, leaving you lightheaded yet desperate for more.

When the kiss broke, it wasn’t abrupt but gentle, like the tide pulling back from the shore. Her forehead rested against yours, and for a moment, the only sound was the soft cadence of your shared breathing. Her eyes searched yours, wide and vulnerable, yet shimmering with something unspoken—something fragile but unmistakably real.

“I’ve been wanting to do that for a long time,” she murmured, her voice barely above a whisper, as though saying it too loudly would shatter the intimacy of the moment. Her confession hung in the air between you, a quiet truth that made your chest tighten in the best possible way.

[chimneyz]

y'all wanted to know what happened, here is a sequel to this post:

Falling, that was the last thing he remembered, falling to his death. No, she said he wasn't going to die. Just falling. 

His eyes sluggishly blink open, his vision hazy, the lights around him were too much to bear. A comforting squeeze wraps around his hand.

"E-Ev'n?" Tommy croaks, his vision still adjusting. 

The squeeze becomes tighter, "No, I sent Buck home," a familiar voice soothes, "I promised I would stay with you until he actually ate and got some rest... you honestly don't know how hard he has fallen for you, do you? 

Tommy's body relaxes, he knows that voice. He may not know that voice as well as he would like, but he knows it. That same voice that practically raised the man he loves. That same voice that was the soul mate to one of his oldest friends. That same voice that told him he wasn't going to die. 

"Maddie?" 

Tommy's vision adjusts, the room was painfully bright, machines beeped around him, his body ached from cuts and bruises. Stitches were spread across his skin. His left leg in a cast lifted above the bed, the right arm tucked into another cast. Next to him, Maddie patiently sits in one of those uncomfortable plastic hospital chairs with a cup of what smells like coffee in her hands. 

"You gave us quite the scare there Tommy," Maddie weakly smiled. 

"Won't happen again," Tommy chuckled, God it hurts to chuckle.

"It better not," Maddie placed her hand on his and squeezed lightly "for my brother's sake." 

There was a comforting silence between them. Tommy doesn't remember much after the crash, just that it happened and with some stroke of luck made it out alive in one piece. 

"H-Hey did you by any chance play that message for Evan?"

Maddie shook her head, "No I didn't." 

"You promised tha-"

"No, no, no," Maddie wiggled her finger at him, "I promised in the worst case scenario that he would listen to the recording." 

"You said there will be no worse case scenario." 

"Was I wrong?" Maddie tilted her head. 

Tommy huffed out a laugh ducking his head, "No, I guess you weren't." 

"Tommy, look at me." 

He forced himself to look at her, her brown eyes full of sincerity. 

"Tell him everything you said, all of it."

"But Maddie," Tommy said "What if he doesn't forgive me, what if I fucked it all up beyond repair what if-"

"I am going to stop you right there. You and I both know that you can fix this. Just tell him."

Tommy weakly smiles, maybe she's right, maybe he can fix this. 

"Tommy you're awake!" Evan cheered as he stood in the doorway. My God did he look like a wreck, dark circles formed under his eyes, a stubble on his cheeks, hair messy. It looked like Evan hadn't slept for days. Not that it mattered, to Tommy this was the most gorgeous person that walked on this earth. Evan rushed to Tommy’s side cupping his face. He winced at the touch still in pain from the crash. 

Evan pulled away concern raising his eyebrows, "Oh, s-sorry I didn't mean-"

"No don't be," Tommy reached his unbroken hand to him, "Never be sorry Evan." 

"So it's Evan now huh?" 

Tommy's gaze moved to Maddie, she gave a reassuring nod getting up from her seat heading towards the door. 

"I will leave you two to it," Maddie smiled. 

"Hey Maddie," Tommy said.

She stopped at the door to look at him one last time before leaving. 

"Thank you."

"Of course, now tell him." 

She gave them privacy by closing the door behind her, Tommy and Evan gazed at each other. 

"Tell me what?" Evan smiled.

Tommy patted the bed gesturing for Evan to come close, to hold him. Tommy gazed in his big blues squeezing Evan's hand wondering how he could have ever walked away from this. No more, not again. Evan was his, and he was Evan's, it was how it was meant to be.

[myz-wykkyd]

Used my limited graphic design skills to make a chart of all the characters Rosalie has romanced in (almost) every farming sim I've played with her. Lol I'd always wanted to do something like this and I'm pretty happy with the result.

I made a free to use template of it on the right if anyone else wants to show off who they romanced. Feel free to decorate/doo what you like with it- just link back here if you use it so other people can find it o/

Brainrot Below<3

Now, though many of these games involved premade mcs- I've played as some variation of Rosalie in games for as long as I could remember.

I noticed there's a trend that popped up in her choices that I think is as interesting as it is amusing. Ofc, most of these choices were just my personal favorite bachelors of that game, but they were still used to devlop her, and I hadn't realized how much she leaned towards certain professions, personalities, ect. I've concluded my girl loves a hardworking boy whose brooding but sweet- or a golden retriever Marlin: Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life was my first Farming Sim. I didn't get to play the female version until much later in life. So my choice of who'd I/Rosalie married had been pretty decided lonnng before I finally got to play it. But honestly even though I like Marlin, he's kind of the default choice because I didn't care for Rock and Gustafa- and Rosalie wouldn't either. I think if I had ever gotten to play HMDS:Cute I might have liked him more- or she would have married Griffin-

Blue | Harvest Moon: Magical Melody / Friends of Mineral Town: Loved Grey/Blue. (Let's face it their pretty much the same character). Upset the remake took away his hat. Little off topic, but even though character customization wouldn't be a thing in these games for years- I'd used to imagine my character had pink hair like Popuri LOL

Vaughn | Harvest Moon: Sunshine Islands: Vaughn was the first time I ever was head over heels for a character in one of these games- I just adored everything about him and I don't think it's hard to see why. Once she got to know him better, Rosalie def would have been hella smitten for this cowboy- (Also Vaughn walked so Logan could run-)

Owen | Harvest Moon Animal Parade: So Owen is an unexpected deviation. Most of these choices are also my favorites, but when I first played through HM:AP Gil was actually my favorite bachelor. I could have made him and Rosalie work, but it just didn't feel right. So after looking them all over I think she def would have preferred Owen

Dylas | Rune Factory 4: One of my favorite games from the genre- and I think the cast of romanceable characters was STACKED. Dylas was my favorite because he was seriously SO damned cute in all his events 🥰 Also think it's kinda funny he's a horse guy and Rosalie has a lot of horse motifs herself-

Alex | Stardew Valley: REALLY unpopular opinion incoming! I've put over 500+ hrs into SV 😭 but in all that time, I've just never clicked with any of the characters. Which really sucks because this is the first game I ever got to play as Rosalie. Alex and Sam were my favs, but I think Rosalie would lean more towards Alex.

Logan | My Time At Sandrock: Logan 😍💖🥰Just, guh- I LOVE everything about him and MTAS so damn much. Especially because the hyper fixation I had with this game/character was what led me to finalize Rosalie's design/character at long last. I developed so much content for him and Rosalie I never got to share 😭hope I can someday!

Mark | Coral Island: God I love big men who love animals- and Rosalie does too. 💦🥰 Honestly, even though he started out as one of my favorites (later to be replaced by Shark man hoo hoo haw), I wished more of his heart events focused on his relationship with the player instead of the dog. It was really cute at first but like 6 of the 8 cutscenes were about it and most of the time he never even interacted with your character. Was disappointing ngl.

Nokk | Roots of Pacha: Now- Nokk is not currently a romanceable character, but I'm hoping the future update will add him to the roster. 🫠💔Cause this is another case where I LOVE the game to pieces but none of the characters speak to me- aside from the one I can't have- Hayden: Fields of Mistria: and last but not least- Hayden. He just completely encapsulates so much of what Rosalie finds attractive, it's a little funny. I'm waiting until the game is finished to continue playing and I can't wait to see what the future holds for him.

The following will include some honorable mentions that I didn't include because I didn't have anymore room on my template/they weren't a farming sim/ect.

First up! Nathaniel from Sunhaven!<3 Feel like this responsible captain of the guard would work well with Rosalie. Honestly, there weren't really any choices that felt right for her, but for once in many years my main playthrough of the game ended up being with a different character and I had someone pre-picked out for her. So there lots of great choices, just none that suit Rosalie well.

[lady-menrva]

I loved Reyna as a character in Heroes of Olympus, but in Trials of Apollo...

• Everyone deserves a break. Especially if you're a praetor who has been through a lot. But I don't know any sane person whose definition of a break is serving a goddess for all eternity, watching their loved ones die, while chasing (*hunting*) wild animals, and doing jobs/quests for said goddess (the last part sounds like Camp Jupiter/Camp Halfblood lite).

A much better closure for her could've been reclaiming her past at San Juan, now that she's moved on and overcome it, enjoying it's things and memories like she wanted too, catching up with her friends at the Greek camp (and her sister too).

Alternatively, she could fulfill her bucket list, enjoy her freedom, take time to know herself, just enjoy life... literally anything. But honestly, why do that when you can just shelve her in the Hunters of Artemis? /s.

• Since her closure was so botched up, the "needs a break" plotline, (inspite of it's brimming potential) coalesced with the romance schtick just seems like an indirect excuse to diss shippers. In canon, Reyna not having a relationship could've been a great decision, but the way it was executed left an unpleasant taste in my mouth.

See also: Reyna's "I'm tired of people shipping me" author insert *heartfelt* speech.

• Come to think of it, I'm also positive that Rick conflated aromanticism and asexuality.

It really hurts that Reyna is Rick's ultimate one-book wonder as a character. She could've been amazing in ToA too, but no...

[lunarubra]

Ok I'm back, sorry I had to skip the last two, I feel bad about it but I could not take the violence. I know I am a baby...

“You came for me?”

Lily, why do you do this to us?! Honestly, I thought my heart couldn't break any more after everything Lucy’s been through, but you had me crying all over again.

This chapter was exactly what I needed—Tommy finally holding her, finally there to bring her back to some kind of safety. But it’s so much more than that, isn’t it? Even though I couldn’t read the details of the torture, the emotional toll she’s carrying is crystal clear. That mental pain is so real. It’s like the world’s weight is on her shoulders, and she’s been through hell. And Tommy, poor Tommy, he’s been through his own kind of hell too, watching it unfold and trying to keep it together.

I feel a little better now knowing they’re back together, but I can’t shake this feeling of dread for what’s to come. Lucy’s struggles are far from over. Those insecurities that she’s always quietly carried, those doubts, they’re amplified now. It’s heartbreaking to think that this trauma might never leave her. But at least Tommy’s there, he way she’s been his rock for so long, it’s his turn to be hers now. He has to step up, but I’m terrified because we know how Tommy can be when it comes to Lucy. He’s so convinced of his feelings for her, sometimes I wonder if he realizes how much she might doubt herself in the face of everything she’s been through. Tommy, you need to take a step back and see her pain for what it is. She’s always been your strength, but now you have to help her rebuild hers.

I’m not sure if I’m ready for what comes next, but I know one thing for sure—these two need each other more than ever now. Whatever happens, I trust they’ll find their way back to each other in the end. Just please, no more heart-shattering moments! You’ve already broken me enough, Lily! But seriously, incredible chapter as always! You’ve got me hooked, and I can’t wait for the next one!

Part 21: The Shadow of the Abattoir

Fandom: Peaky Blinders

Pairing: Tommy Shelby x OC

Summary: Lucy may be out of Luca's clutches, but that does not mean that the pain is over.

Word Count: 4,635

Notes: Warnings for depictions of blood, drug use, and references to torture and violence.

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Chapter 25: Safe

The tires of the Bentley squealed in protest as Tommy slammed on the brakes, bringing the car to a screeching stop just outside the steps leading to the church’s doors. Pulling his revolver from his coat, he leapt from the car, taking the steps two at a time, fully prepared to be met with gunfire the second that he yanked the door open.

Instead, he was met with eerie, impenetrable silence. 

He skidded to a halt, eyes widening in horror at the sight before him. 

It looked like a fucking massacre had happened. 

Blood was smeared all over the altar. Some had even splattered back to drench over the huge wooden cross mounted against the far wall. Two bodies were slumped over in chairs at a table set up in the space between the pews and the altar, cards spread out across the table. One of the corpses still had a hand of aces and jacks clutched between his fingers. 

There were more bodies scattered throughout the pews. Most were shot, but there was one by the foot of the altar that looked at though someone had been at him with a hunting knife or maybe a machete, his head hanging to his neck by only a thin sliver of skin. 

The burning stench of blood and gunpowder invaded Tommy’s nose, the smell metallic and almost eye watering. 

His ears pricked at a small sound. A tiny hitch in breathing. His fingers tightened around his revolver, wholly prepared for an ambush at any moment. With slow, cautious steps, he made his way down the aisle, rounding the front row of pews as he tried to zone in on where the sound had come from. 

Another noise that this time was more clearly a stifled sob came from the altar, and Tommy’s head snapped around in the direction of the podium. With quick, still cautious movements, he picked his way over to the very back of the altar where it was located, gun raised as he rounded the podium so that whoever was hiding behind it came into view.  

She was huddled there. A hunting knife clutched to her chest, and covered in so much blood and bruises that he hardly recognized her at first. 

Tommy swore that his heart stopped. Lucy’s hair was matted and greasy, her face splattered with so much blood he could barely make out how ashen her skin was underneath. The clothes she was dressed in were much too big for her and soaked crimson–with her own blood or with someone else’s, he couldn’t be sure. Her head was bowed so that he could not see her eyes. 

Tommy almost staggered at the sight of her. A sob of relief at finding her alive caught in his throat at the same time that horror at the state she was in warped through him like a shockwave.  

My God, love, what have they done to you?

“Lucy–” he dropped down to his knees, setting his revolver flat on the floor beside them. He reached out to touch her knee, and she suddenly jerked to life, knife jabbing out wildly. He barely managed to catch her wrist in time, the tip of the blade just tickling the front of his waistcoat. “It’s okay. It’s okay. It’s me.”

She stared at him with wild, unfocused eyes, like she did not quite understand. Her breathing was rough and labored, but the moment recognition passed across her face, the wildness of lingering adrenaline and violence melted away. Tears filled her eyes, and her breaths started to hitch with barely contained sobs.

“Tommy?” her voice croaked, and his heart shattered at how small and broken she sounded. She was looking at him as if she did not entirely believe that he was actually there. Her grip on the knife slackened enough that he was able to pull it away from her and set it down beside where his revolver lay on the floor. “You came for me?”

There was something about the question that nearly cleaved him in two. Had she really not thought that he would? Did she really believe that he wouldn’t have torn apart the entire fucking world to find her if he had to?

“Of course I did, sweetheart,” he inched closer to her, wanting desperately to pull her into his arms, but not wanting to further hurt or upset her.

Lucy’s eyes screwed shut with a violent sob, and then she flung herself at him, arms locking around his neck, clinging to his collar as if it was the only thing holding her to the earth. Rattling sobs that jerked her entire body began to rage through her, crying so hard he was a little afraid that she wouldn’t be able to breathe. 

Tommy swallowed roughly, wrapping his arms around her and closing his eyes against the emotion welling up inside of him, just feeling the weight of her in his arms for a moment. She was here. She was alive. He felt tears of deep relief brimming at his lash line. 

“Oh my Lucy.” He turned his head to kiss her temple. “Shh,” he shushed her gently, stroking her hair and rocking them both a little from side to side. “It’s okay. I’m here. I’m here. You’re safe. I’ve got you.”

She just kept sobbing even harder, and when he brushed his hand across her back, she flinched with a soft cry. He quickly retracted his hand, eyes widening. It was obvious that she was hurt, but the extent of which he could not be entirely sure. 

“We need to get out of here, love.” He hated to move her so quickly, but who knows if there were more Italians skulking about somewhere, or even Luca himself. Much as he’d have loved to get his hands on him, he needed to get Lucy to safety first. 

She nodded weakly against his shoulder, and he leaned back to remove his coat to drape around her. The shock was beginning to settle in as her blood began to cool, bringing with it shivers that wracked her tiny body. 

When he finished pulling off his coat, Lucy's eyes grew huge, hand reaching out to questionably touch the stained sleeves of the shirt he was wearing underneath it, the dried blood having left the material crusty. 

“It’s not mine,” Tommy assured her, wrapping the coat securely around her shoulders, hoping it would help to cushion any injuries she had against his touch. She suddenly seemed very tiny and fragile, half hunched in on herself, eyes bugged out and half mad with pain and fear. He grabbed his revolver from the floor, jamming it back into its holster. “What did he do, sweetheart?” he broached the question as gently as he knew how. Lucy’s eyes unfocused. There was a haziness in them. A deadness that sent a shiver down Tommy’s spine. She started to shake like a leaf, lips trembling, clutching his coat tighter around herself. 

“I don’t…I can’t…”

“It’s okay.” He quickly soothed. “We can talk about that later. How badly are you hurt?”

Her eyes filled with terror. “I don’t know.”

Tommy swallowed hard, battling back his own panic. He needed to be the strong one right now. “Okay. That’s alright. I’ll get you to a doctor. They’ll make it better, love, I promise.” He kissed her forehead. “I’m going to pick you up now, okay?”

She didn’t respond, eyes staring blankly at a space directly above his right shoulder. Tommy touched her chin delicately, turning her face to look at him again. 

“Lucy?”

She blinked, as if coming out of a dream. “Okay.”  

He stood and scooped her up bridal style into his arms. A whimper left her lips. 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he apologized at the sound of pain, carrying her with hasty steps towards the door. “Not that far to the car, I promise.”

Lucy made no indication of hearing his words. But her head leaned heavily against his shoulder, eyes staring straight ahead. Pale as a ghost, she could have been mistaken for a corpse at first glance with how still she was. He had to check to make sure that she was still breathing.  

Worry squeezed in his chest, and he tightened his grip on her unconsciously. 

Another Bentley was just pulling up as he stepped outside, and for a moment Tommy panicked, thinking that it might be Luca or some of his men about to ambush them. That was until he recognized Arthur behind the wheel.

“Oh, Jesus Christ,” Arthur said as he stepped out of the car and saw Lucy, his face going pale. Tommy shot him a grave look. 

“Open the door for me, will you, Arthur?”

His brother rushed around them to open the passenger side door of Tommy’s car, and he slid Lucy gingerly into place on the leather seats.

“Don’t leave me!” she cried out, suddenly rousing from the still, silent trance she’d fallen into as he carried her out of the church. Her hand flew out to grab desperately at him.   

“I’m not going anywhere, baby, I promise,” he let her draw him in closer to her, wrapping his arms around her and kissing the top of her head. “I just gotta get around to the other side so I can drive.”

It nearly killed him to pull away from her frantic grip, her hands extremely reluctant to let him go despite his reassurances. Mindful to stay in her line of sight as he walked around the front of the car to open the driver’s side door, he felt his heart twist at the way she followed him with wide, terrified eyes. The coat he’d wrapped around her made her look even smaller as she huddled under the heavy dark fabric. 

Sliding into the seat next to Lucy, he quickly wrapped an arm around her, letting her tuck into his side. Burrowed in deep against him, he could feel her shaking violently. Being careful not to put too much pressure into his touches to avoid hurting her, he smoothed his hand up and down her shoulder while he rolled down the window to talk to Arthur. 

“I’m taking her home.”

“Not to the hospital?” “No, I don’t trust them anymore after Luca managed to get in to see Michael. I’ll have a doctor brought to her.”

“You want me to stay here?”

He nodded. “Luca might come back. The Golds are on their way?”

“Yeah.”

“Right. Stay here for a few hours. If Luca or any of his men don’t show up, come back home.”

Arthur nodded, shoving his hands into his pockets, taking a step back so Tommy could begin to back the Bentley away from the front of the church. 

“Just hang on,” he told Lucy as he gunned them down the main road. 

“Hurts, Tommy,” she rasped, and he felt panic seize at his throat with icy talons. Casting a quick glance at her, the feeling only grew at the sight of her bloodied clothes. He didn’t even know where exactly she was hurt. Or how serious it was. 

“I know, baby. I know. I’ll make it better, eh? Soon as we get home, I’ll get you patched right up. Everything is going to be okay.”

He didn’t know if he was speaking more to her or to himself. 

∗ ∗ ∗

Lucy stared numbly at the peeling paint of the front door leading into the Shelby’s home. It felt as though her brain had been filled with smoke, so thick that it was hard to think through. Her body ached, and she was so tired that she couldn’t even bring her muscles to move at all after Tommy stopped the car and got out. The most she could manage was a small whimper when he moved to pull away from her. 

“Just going around to get you from the other side, sweetheart,” he told her gently, kissing her forehead and making sure that she was leaning up against the leather seats so she wouldn’t tip over without him there to hold her up. 

True to his word, he came around to the other side of the car, opening her door and picking her up as though she weighed as much as a single pillow. She curled into his chest, wishing that she could somehow burrow her way entirely into him and hide away from the rest of the world. 

He carried her with hasty steps into the house, rushing them past the shocked, horrified expressions of the other family members. 

“Get me the medical supplies and a bottle of rum, Pol,” he ordered Polly on his way towards the stairs. “Finn, bring the tub from Charlie’s room into my bedroom and fill it with water.” With steps that were careful not to jostle her too much, he started to climb the stairs. “Ada, phone Doctor Evans at the hospital and tell him I need him to make a house call. I’ll pay whatever he wants.” 

Orders given and starting to be carried out, he kicked open the half ajar door leading into their bedroom. At the sight of the bed, Lucy was overcome with how tired she was. The kind of tired that went to the very bones. That made her feel as though she could have slept for an entire lifetime. 

Tommy set her down on the bed with a gentleness that was near heartbreaking. He stroked some hair out of her eyes, fingertips brushing delicately along her skin, checking her over as if to make sure that she was still there. 

“It’s okay,” he said when he met her teary eyes, a hand holding her by the upper arm to help keep her upright. Polly came rushing in with a box clutched in her arms. She set it down on the nightstand, opening it for Tommy to rifle through. Finn arrived a moment later, dragging the bathtub with him, vanishing then returning with buckets of steaming water to pour into it. 

“Lucy,” Tommy touched her face, urging her gaze back to him. “Love, I’m going to need to take off your clothes to check your injuries.”

A shudder went through her. She did not want him to see what Luca had done to her. How he’d ruined her; reopened all the wounds she’s worked so painstakingly hard to close.

Tommy cradled the side of her head, drawing her close until she could rest her face against the side of his neck. She sniffled.

“Polly or Ada can do it instead if you’d rather,” he whispered. She shook her head, panic seizing her at the idea of being in such a vulnerable position with anyone other than him. “Okay.” He stroked down her hair, along the nape of her neck, and she let out a relieved breath that he understood without her having to explain further. “Right,” he raised his voice to address the rest of the room. “Everyone out.” The command was followed by a snap of his fingers. Finn immediately went to the door, shouldering past Ada and Lizzie who had crowded in the hall to peer through the doorway. Polly hesitated a moment longer, staring at Lucy with wide, dark eyes, before setting down the bottle of rum she’d brought along with the medical kit on the nightstand.

“I’ll let you know when Doctor Evans arrives,” she said to Tommy quietly. He just nodded, and she finally went to exit the room, herding Lizzie along with her. But Ada remained. 

“Tommy, if you need help, I’ll be just downstairs.” She touched his shoulder lightly. He shot her a grateful look before returning to rifling through the medical kit. Ada glanced at Lucy, taking a careful step forward, as if trying not to spook her, and pressed a kiss to the top of her head. “I am glad you’re alive, sister.” She murmured into her curls, and Lucy almost started weeping at the sentiment. 

Ada departed, closing the door behind her and leaving them alone. Lucy felt her bottom lip begin to tremble, hands bracing on either side of the bed. Tremors started to wrack through her limbs again, her breathing growing ragged and short, chest tightening. 

“Hey, hey.” Tommy was suddenly kneeling right in front of her, cupping her cheeks. “Look at me. It’s okay. You’re safe. You’re safe, Lucy.”

She squeezed her eyes shut, another round of sobs overtaking her. It hurt to cry. It hurt to do anything. “T-Tommy…”

“I know, I know,” his strong palm curled around the back of her head, resting on the base of her skull, and then pulling her face forward to tuck into his shoulder. He smelled strongly of the dried blood still clinging to his shirt, but under that she could still detect traces of his cologne. Of smoke and pine. Of safety. “I’m sorry, love. I’m so, so sorry. I came as fast as I could.”   

She nodded. Of course. Of course he did. She felt guilty for ever even considering that he wouldn’t.

He gave her a gentle squeeze then leaned back, caressing her face and leaning in to kiss her forehead tenderly. His fingers traced over the collar of her shirt, drenched in a combination of blood that belonged to both her and the guards that she had killed. 

“Can I take this off so I can check you?” he asked, wide eyes searching hers. She swallowed hard around the panic in her throat and nodded. It was just Tommy. She was safe with Tommy. 

At her nod, he pulled from the medical kit a pair of scissors and, with careful, gentle movements, started to cut away at the fabric of her shirt.

The fabric had stuck to her skin in multiple places where blood from her wounds had started to clot and harden, and Tommy had to yank a little to get it off. A harsh breath sucked into his lungs once he’d pulled the garment away. Lucy couldn’t bring herself to look at him, instead staring down at the floor with a lump in her throat, fingers playing with each other. She could feel him examining her, taking in the ruined expanse of her back, the reopened scars winding down her body, the bruises blooming on what little was left of her that hadn’t been sliced open.  

“Lucy…” he choked out, inching closer to her. She sniffled, burying her face in her hands, trying to hide her shame from him. “Hey,” he put an arm around her, careful to settle it high enough around her shoulders so that he wasn’t disturbing the worst of her injuries. “Oh, my love, shhh…” his thumb stroked up and down. “I know. I know, baby. I’m so sorry.” He waited until she quieted before his hand ghosted over–but didn’t actually touch–her shredded back. “Sweetheart…what did this?”

“He called it a cat o’nine tails,” she whispered. Tommy sucked in a breath again, suddenly leaning over her, examining her left shoulder more closely. “You have a bullet wound in your shoulder.”

“Oh.” She blinked, suddenly remembering. “Yeah. One of them got me during the shootout in the church.” Her voice was scaring even her with how dead and empty it sounded. Tommy gingerly touched the skin beside the bullet hole.

“I’m going to have to take it out.”

“Okay.”

He started to gather up materials from the kit. Snatching the washcloth hanging off the rim of the tub, he dipped it into the water. “Sorry,” he apologized at her hiss when he wiped at the wound. “Drink this.” A glass of whiskey was nudged into her hand. She took a few sips, aware that she would need as much pain numbing as she could get, but also unable to bring herself to entirely care. It wasn’t like it could hurt much worse than what Luca had already done to her.

She was aware of Tommy shooting her worried looks of deep distress every few moments.

“Right,” he cleared his throat, adjusting the way that he was sitting on the bed so that he was behind her. “Try not to move. I’ll make this as fast as I can.”

She curled her head down so that he could have as best access as possible to her shoulder. He hooked one arm around her, thumb repeating the soothing up and down rubbing motion when she hissed a little at how tightly he gripped her to keep her in place. A pair of tweezers probed at the wound, and then plunged in. She cried out, hands latching onto her knees, gritting her teeth. 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” Tommy sounded to be almost on the verge of tears, holding her firmly in place while he worked the tweezers. She screamed again as they scraped against the edge of her opened flesh, trying to get a grip on the little metal ball inside her. “I know. I know it hurts. Just a bit more. You’re doing so well, love…”

Another whimper of pain from her, a slight twist of the tweezers, and then he was retracting them along with the bullet that had lodged itself into her flesh. 

He wiped at the wound, dropped the bullet into an empty whiskey glass on the bedside table, then hugged her. She realized that she’d started crying again. 

“All done, all done, love. No more. You did so good, sweetheart.”

She burrowed into him, shuddering, closing her eyes until the sharp bite of pain drew back into the consistent throb she’d grown accustomed to. 

“Alright?” Tommy asked, after giving her a few moments to recover. She nodded, eyes closing and leaning into him. “I need to disinfect all these cuts, honey.” He sounded truly distraught at the idea of causing her more discomfort, and when she looked up, she was met with an agonized expression she’d only seen cross his face a handful of times before.

“Okay.”

He leaned back, looking earnestly into her eyes. “Tell me if it hurts too much.”

She nodded. He kissed the top of her head, and once more reached for the rag, wetting it in the water in the tub, and beginning to very, very gingerly clean her skin of all the dried blood so he could get a better look at what her injuries looked like.

They had to pause so that he could remove her trousers, Lucy gripping his arm tightly to keep herself upright as she stood so he could pull them down her legs. The frown on his lips only deepened as he took in the cuts that marked her hips and legs. He knew her body well enough, there was no doubt in her mind that he recognized that the pattern of the fresh cuts perfectly matched those of her old scars. 

“Sorry, sorry,” he whispered, as she whined when he poured the rum he’d asked Polly to bring over her injuries, taking care to ensure he got each and every cut. Most had already clotted and partially scabbed over, so she was in no real danger of bleeding out. Luca had been careful in his every incision. It had not yet been his intention to kill her. 

A shiver wracked down her spine at the thought of what else he may have done to her if she hadn’t managed to get away.  

“Is the doctor not coming?” she asked, as Tommy finally set aside the rum and started to prepare a needle and thread to stitch her up.

Tommy frowned, glancing at the clock. “I don’t want to wait for him.”

She nodded. Truth be told, she’d rather Tommy stitch her up over anyone else anyway. 

It was as he began to thread the needle through her skin that, in a small, hoarse voice, she started to tell him what had happened. How Luca took her from Lizzie’s home. How he strung her up in the bowels of the church for days on end. The whipping. The reopening of her scars. How she escaped. The carnage that she had to commit to do so. 

He listened silently, only interjecting every once in a while with the occasional question. But she could see his jaw tighten as she described the things that Luca had said and done to her, black pools of rage opening up behind his eyes, rivaled only by the horror that she also saw reflected there. 

When he was done stitching and bandaging her up, he retrieved one of his shirts–the soft, white cotton Henley that she liked so much–for her to wear. It was loose enough on her to not disturb any of her bandages, and as an added bonus it smelled like him. His brows pulled together at the way she yelped and flinched when she had to lift her arms so he could help her pull it over her head. The movement sent her shoulders ablaze with pain. 

“Lay down,” Tommy ordered gently, a hand on her head guiding her to rest her cheek against the pillow. She curled up on her side. There was no way she could lay on her back right now with the state that it was in. “There you go.” He pulled the quilt up to her chin, making sure it covered her completely. 

“W-wait, don’t go–” she lifted her head, suddenly half panicked when he rose to his feet. 

“I’m not going anywhere, love,” he assured, urging her to lay her head back down. Still, she watched him anxiously as he went to the nightstand, pulling open the drawer and rifling around inside until he pulled out a small vial of liquid.

“Tommy?”

“It’ll help with the pain.” he sat down on the edge of the bed, pouring a glass of whiskey and then adding a splash of the liquid into it, giving it all a quick stir. “It’ll help you sleep. At least until the doctor gets here.” 

She frowned. They’d bought it for special occasions. It seemed a pity to waste it on something as dour as this. But she didn’t have the energy to argue with him. And she did want everything to stop hurting. Even if just for a little bit. 

“Alright.”

He raised the glass to her lips. The whiskey and opium burned a little on the way down, and almost immediately she felt her eyelids grow heavier.

“I’m going to go get changed and cleaned up, alright?” he leaned over to set the empty glass down on the nightstand, then smoothed his hand along her forehead. “I’ll be in the washroom right down the hall. Just shout if you need me, eh?”

“You’ll come right back?”

“I promise.”

She nodded. It was getting harder and harder to keep her eyes open. Tommy kissed her forehead. 

“Just rest, eh? Try to sleep. I’ll be right back.”

She watched him go, pulling the blanket in tighter around herself. She heard his footsteps thud on the floor across the hall to the washroom, the squeak of the hinges and then the click of the door closing. 

She was pretty sure, despite her mind drifting in and out of consciousness by that point from the opium and pure exhaustion, that she then heard the muffled sounds of him retching. 

She was in and out after that, so it was hard to pinpoint how long Tommy was actually gone for. It couldn’t have been long, though. Only ten minutes at most.

“Tommy?” she asked, stirring against the pillow at the sound of footsteps near the bed, unable to open her eyes. 

“I’m right here.” His voice came somewhere near her head. Her hand reached out weakly, and a moment later his fingers engulfed hers tightly.

“Don’t leave me alone,” she begged. He kissed her temple. 

“Never in a thousand years.”

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[fertilizing-daffodils]

God it really is a heavy day today. I almost want to scream.

[valkyurii]

it’s funny how things have gone full circle with malenia. she was so hated when the game first came out, but then people grew to like her. then the dlc came out and now people hate her again lmao

[adhderall]

well as you can see besides being ugly as all fuck I'm also extremely bitter so that doesn't help at all in making me appealing. but it also comes with the territory you see, being treated as a hideous freak of nature for your whole life kind of does things to your psyche.

also going into shit in the tags as an extreeeemely jaded individual who's been on every side of the discourse and KNOWS it all VERY PERSONALLY so I know many people will find all sorts of different reasons to hate me (if they want ig) because I'm ~politically homeless~ at this point because I'm sick and tired of everything but whatever

(also fuck I ran out of space in the tags so another post maybe idk. )

[astraearinehart]

──Stella nodded with an understanding when Beau responded to her question, but she was glad they seemed to comprehend the tale she made up for them ( or how they needed to be older to learn how to wield magic ). they are such a lively pair, she caught herself thinking, and she knows so little about how to interact with them, take care of them, yet still somehow makes it work. to say she doesn’t enjoy getting along with them would be a lie, and she adores them too, would like the opportunity to get to know them better  —she only wished they would quit calling her granny; damn Claude and his teachings. they are smart, picked up on things much easier than she would expect from babies their age, too, but shaking the habit? seemed an impossible task.

another nod followed Liz’s pointers when she reminded her of a few things regarding the twins, besides the no swearing or smoking in front of them. “I keep forgetting that,” the older blonde shook her head as if half-annoyed at herself about it. “that’s why all their drawings,” if one could even call the random assortment of lines that, “are so odd in colors most of the time!” she laughed, fondly. “I will remember.” she could already think of a couple of activities she would like to do with them; though now she did wonder if being colorblind would affect them. when the topic shifted to her father, however, her joyful mood and tone somewhat fainted. her relationship with her father was definitely a delicate one at this point and she worried that perhaps this time her father was pissed with her for good.

she was even surprised when Liz mentioned that he had confirmed what she had told her daughter, that she was unaware of him knowing about Liz through all these years. “thank you,” she nodded, “I know I may come off as a lot, but I came to mend our relationship, Liz, I wouldn’t have lied to you right away…” she pointed out, softly. “honestly? your guess is as good as mine at this point…” a shrug followed her words. “my mother is a difficult person, so I am not sure if daddy would have told her…” a beat. “but my bet is that if she knew, she would have used it to say something to me during one of our arguments.”

⸻ The twins were in awe when their grandmother explained how an evil wizard tried to attack her, hence the scar on her face. They thought their grandmother was badass. Lilou was giggling when Stella pinched her cheeks. ❛ Non. Mama don't let us. ❜ Beau responded to his grandmother. In reality, they are still too young for it, and they get scared by certain things in the movie easily, they're only two years old, what do they know? Elizabeth only told them the basics. The twins were excited that their grandmother would teach them magical things. Liz was in silence hearing her toddlers interacting with her mother, glad that they knew how to keep a conversation.

The younger Aussie was taken by surprise a bit as her mother described her temper when she was a child. There are certain things she cannot remember, she was too little but she remembers always trying to be good to be noticed by her mother. In a way, she used Stella as a model example to NOT follow when she had her twins. ⎯ When the topic shifted to her twins. ❛ It sounds like a good idea. ❜ And she will also learn the temper of the duo, not that she couldn't tell… She'd learn more things from them. ❛ Just, remember as they're in the learning phase talking, or recognizing the letters or colors… They're colorblind. You'll need to help them with that. ❜ It was a discreet way to ask for Stella to be patient with them.

Elizabeth could tell that her mother had a strong connection with her father. The response about her grandmother wasn't surprising for Liz, the family gathering that was supposed to be happy and united turned out a big mess for everyone. ❛ I'm sorry about that. ❜ She took another sip from her tea and observed the twins, that was eating, dirtying themselves a little. ❛ He told me about it. That's why I accepted the invitation. ❜ She said with honesty. ❛ So, how about my grandmother? Does she know about me too? ❜

[look-at-the-stars-tonight]

the amount of effort that goes into figuring out what to cook and eat every day is RIDICULOUS. i used to think people were so weird and boring for eating the same thing every single day but it truly does make life so much easier

[bunnyboy-juice]

oughghgh

[orcelito]

Despite all odds, I have arrived home safely👍

Turns out that the earlier goop was the better goop. The adderall goop. The adderall has worn off now though. So I am. Very incredibly out of it.

But I am home. And I will take my quick shower. And then I will climb into bed.

I do need to eat. But... later...

[cheekblush]

lmaoooo found out today that my 2 “colleagues” (that’s honestly a too nice of a word for them) complained about me to our boss that apparently i don’t work hard enough and often just sit around doing nothing :)

[lususnatura]

🎤 🎤 🎤

a song that i associate with my muse meme!

AHH, hey, ramone!! thank you for sending in this prompt :D since you sent in three of the mic's, i shall now be treating you to three songs that make me think of blamore when i hear them / that i associate with it. an explanation of why i chose them will be in the tags <3

hozier - who we are.

icehouse - crazy.

depeche mode - personal jesus.

[seilon]

pro: ran into a coworker at a bar last night who I don’t really talk to usually (he works upstairs, I work downstairs) and we talked and im pretty sure we were highkey flirting and he bought me a drink and the bar merch shirt i was interested in and thanks to the power of alcohol i guess i asked for his number and he gladly gave it to me and. yeah

con: i have the second worst hangover i have ever had and have been fighting for my fucking life just to eat saltines

[skrunksthatwunk]

i just finished saw v and i don't have high hopes for the rest of the franchise (based on what ive heard) but im in too deep to stop now