#and its like...this is why i dont like sharing shit
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if you’re still taking transmasc stories, heres something I cant get over.
My long-time friend told me some time ago that she didnt like how my voice sounded and that so did my other friend, who was considering testosterone - he was concerned he’d sound like me.
the exact words spoken then are lost to me, but im still upset about it. yes, i sound audibly queer. yes, my voice was shaped in part by testosterone. however, i never made any conscious efforts aside from taking hrt to change my voice - or my anything since transitioning - thats just what i sound like naturally on testosterone. whats so wrong with it? whats so scary about it? i choose not to bind for medical reasons and i choose not to voice train bc i dont want to and i don’t need to be told these things make me stand out- i know.
thank you for taking the time to share, i really appreciate it, your story deserves to be heard
that is just terrible. why does that matter to you. why does that affect you. okay, so SHE doesn't like the way it sounds... what does that have to do with you? that has nothing to do with you. this is about YOUR transition, NOT about how it makes OTHER PEOPLE feel!
if she doesn't like the way it sounds, she can hit the road. sorry, but a lot of people trans people really do look, act and sound trans. you're not obligated to bind. you're not obligated to do any voice training. some transmascs and trans men LIKE the ""tranny voice"" they get from testosterone without doing any vocal training to make it deeper. its YOUR voice, you get to decide how high or deep it is.
and i don’t need to be told these things make me stand out- i know.
i think that's the part that kills me about this. you're the one living with this. YOU know, you don't need to be told these things. it's kinda like how i can't stand how people in the transfem community are obsessed with reminding each other that we're miserable and that we stand out from cishet society. like we KNOW, we are the ones living it! we don't need to be reminded!
i hope people learn to mind their own business about your voice, and that your friend who wants to go on T can start to so without fear of what the hell that person is saying about transmasculine voices. that behavior is disgusting and you know they would not be giving a transfem person as much shit to their face about how their voice sounds as they are giving to you. it's specifically because of how that person views testosterone & transmasc voices and it's disgusting. this behavior needs to stop. someone ELSE'S voice isn't about you
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#rah not to vent but like#im so scared theres people talking shit about my writing#“well thats unrealistic!” nope no its not#ive literally been in a server where i was mocked and made fun of in the mod chat#my dni/about from 2016 ended up on a Particular Site ( 🥝 🚜 ) its not a reach to think someone somewhere is mocking my writing#and its like...this is why i dont like sharing shit#ive had one of my own characters end up on a “bad character” blog#im just??? whatever its all more of the same ig#vent#ecks speaks
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Life on the farm
#gopher art#mortal kombat#subscorp#mk subzero#mk scorpion#kuai liang#hanzo hasashi#mortal kombat legends#been holding onto this one for a bit! finished it more than a month ago lol#i was originally going to save it for subscorp week but then i was like. nah. that wouldnt be entirely fair lol#and besides. ive been wanting to share it for long enough and my resolve has kinda worn down#anyway - snowblind but AU'd! heres my concept of this (which i may use later on for something idk): king kano got his shit wrecked#like way before the events of the movie. by the revenants in fact. i want him torn to shreds. you still have random roving assholes#making trouble across the wastes. but its much less dire. kuai still retires to his farm. kenshi still falls for shang tsung's bullshit#and kuai mentors him. hanzo becomes warlord of netherrealm. BUT. he and kuai keep in contact. its long distance and they make it work#sometimes scorpion vacays to Kuai's farm. as a treat. thats what this drawing is#i cant deny that i literally just want them to be happy ok. thats literally all i want for these gay old ninjas#bonus commentary: at the time of drawing this i was still figuring out how i wanted to draw hanzo. he's so fucking hard to draw#when i draw him without his mask or beard he looks so fucking off. but if i draw him with the beard it feels weird too.#babygirl why are you so hard to draw?? dont you want me to draw you?????
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fuck i need to replay isat because i cant remember anything but um something something siffrin's increasingly concerning comments through the acts on losing his appetite -> getting violently hungry -> having tear induced nightmares about cannibalizing his friends
#food in isat makes me Think all the time. and the hungry. and then the gluttony. and the tugging on the stomach#THERES JUST SO MUCH WITH FOOD AND EATING IN ISAT THAT I NEED TO SLAP TOGETHER. IVE CONNECTED THE DOTS.#theres something About it to me. buit i am STUPUD.#<-hasnt connected shit#snacktime beinging them together and sharing a meal. but its the same over snd over. eating for your favorite food over snd over.#croissants. pineapple. banana. you dresmt you ate your friends whole. etc.#tbh the fact that loop and siffrin are so similarily 'greedy' but loop physically cant eat and siffrin has no choice but to is kind of fun.#maybe no choice isnt the right word but you know???? what i mean ?? you cant make bonnie sad.#in stars and time spoilers#isat spoilers#ofc when i first played i just immediately thought as the thg in your stomach as like when you feel a metaphorical drop in your stomach#st something shocking/upsetting/scary whatever. But. SEE THIS IS WHY I CANT WRITE ANYTHING I DONT KNOW WORDS.#i dont even have s good excuse. english is my only language. sacre bleu.
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Have we ever seen this old man being affectionate with drivers or other juniors? Or just Yuki? I don't even think I've seen him this close to Max and Seb (off the podium at least)
Brother.
#he says some senile shit every now & then but hes literally & unfortunately yuki's biggest fan 💀#im not posting this with hope for the 2nd seat idgaf anymore (lol. lying) im just flabbergasted at how much he visited him 💀#thats why i feel betrayed hes siding w lawson lol cause ive never seen them together 😭#LIKE when liam outscored yuki at sg last yr all he said was#“good job. that's pretty much it” LMFAO? helmut was pissed 😭#tbf hes been backing yuki for YEARSS i think hes just tired now 💀 at least w lawson he can agree w horner ab & he can have a pawn somewhere#but i dont see how sharing liam w horner can help marko 😭 liam will be loyal to him for sure but the bias is so clear 💀#liam would easily jump ship to horner 💀#i 100% blame helmut for the pointless team trapping of yuki like he DEF did it. i dont think he wants to let him go LOL. but im mad ab it😭#once again i dont speak with a source you're 🫵 in my delirious mind palace and you're hostage in it 😁#he'd rather have yuki careerless post 2026 than not have him at red bull 💀 should be funny but im PISSED#ITS SO EASY JUST FRAUD HIM INTO A TOP SEAT 😭#ppl calling yuki a honda merchant when hes a helmut merchant 😭 theyre literally his parents who are divorcing LOL#rmb when yuki said he didnt read thru the contract? im convinced its cuz helmut made it so he just said yes 💀#apparently honda wanted to keep him 1 more yr @ f3 but marko promoted him to f2 anyway 💀 & hes the one who dropped him into europe 💀#ah helmut. yuki's double edged sword#dropped him to europe & cant empathise with him struggling there alone 💀 typical racist grandpa#this opens a tough question tho: did the therapy he forced yuki to do actually help? cause if it was someone else he wouldnt even have care#he handled it so awfully but his concern for yuki was... is real.#i was thinking that i need yuki to have someone who favors him just as how ron dennis did for mika then i realized that's literally helmut💀#hes still alive cause hes not going until he sees yuki as wdc 😭#helmut marko#yuki tsunoda#yt22#f1txt
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so so so glad ur art has been taking off lately... i've loved ur dol art for ages now, so it's fun to see things with a wider appeal blow up! nwn
ty for sticking with me for so long !!!! it's honestly so surreal tbh,, im just kinda doing whatever comes to mind / whatever i want to do, im glad people seem to like it :33
#idkk its kinda lowkey scary in a way a part of me wants to gatekeep my stuff#NOT TO SAY IM NOT GRATEFUL it just feels like im kinda put under a spotlight and im expected to keep drawing the same shit and idkkk#and idkkkkkk i dont want to say its for a wider appeal its kinda giving me the vibes of calling my drawings content and idkkkkkkkkkkkkkk#like ohh you have to know who ur target audience is oh you have to stop posting that bc no one cares and like who gives a shit#if i like it then i like it#i mean its why i dont put so many main tags in my stuff i just put the general fandom tag and character tag for organization purposes#except for like... that one mouthwashing drawing i think i wanted to add the character tags but it ended up looking like i was trying to#add every single tag under the sun 😭#which isnt bad btw !!!! i think every art/writing/project etc etc deserves to be seen and tags help with that#personally i dont like doing it so much unless i put a considerate amount of effort into a drawing bc i earned it or smthn#shit most of my stuff just has my personal tags in it i really didnt expect for them to suddenly be shared around#its that whole 'fear of being percieved vs that need for validation' i have going on. it kinda annoying tbh#sorry i got so rambly in the tags i overthink a lot can u tell LMAO#franswers
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Ngl as a small business owner who puts out something extremely pirate-able and who has never earned enough to make a pay check, this...
...is extremely upsetting.
Do y'all realize that most small business are maybe a handful of people? Do y'all realize that company's like LLCs exist to protect owners from legal and financial repercussions if the company falls apart? I'm not a company because I have stockholders, I'm a company so that if the business goes bankrupt the banks can't seize my fucking house. It's not evil to use existing legal structures to protect my family's assets. It's not unreasonable to ask people not to steal from businesses like mine.
It's like on Tumblr when it's One Artist or One Author Doing The Thing Themself you guys are all about it but the minute anyone tries to collectivize to do better we go from One Person Against The World to The Embodiment of Capitistic Evil with no in between, which is especially insane coming from the website that claims to think individualism has turned toxic and we should do more with community organization. The minute lots of people are involved in a business, there HAS to be legal structures like contracts and shit to protect the people involved. The Lone Creator Forging a Path is great for that one person. What about everyone else?
And so... some of us try to make a company to lift up a group.
And then I see shit takes like this.
Maybe. Maybe DONT fucking pirate from literally anyone just cause they've got the word "company" I'm the name?
Maybe remember that for small businesses, yes even when they're a company, there's a single person, or a family, or a group of friends, who are working their asses off to build something, and actually? Stealing from them makes you a FUCKING DICK.
Like. You realize we're just people right? Other regular people trying to survive the dystopian hellscape that is the now?
Maybe stop acting like you're automatically entitled to the labor and creations of others solely because you've decided that there is an entire huge category of people it's okay to steal from.
Like honestly. What the fuck.
#unforth rambles#i get that a general post isnt about me specifically#but yall realize that in the same way that saying certain things about appearance causes splash damage to everyone who shares that appearan#saying shit like this does splash damage to people like me#well i didnt MEAN a small place like yours i meant disney#well thats not at all what op said and i am definitely included in what op said#i know how hard i work and the people like me work#and i guarantee that even if some people reblogging this mean big places plenty dont and they feel validated by this#idk if our stuff has been pirated i refuse to check#but i intentionally dont use drm because fuck thwt noise so its certainly possible#and considering i work 50 hours plus a week and have never gotten paid while trying to build this into something sustainable#i think maybe you can appreciate why this shit pisses me off so bad#i am the splash damage on your piracy is cool oh but i didnt mean from you hun kinds of posts#if there are truly times you dont think piracy is okay maybe stop reblogging posts that say its always okay#also apologies to the mutuals who reblogged rhe above#i know you dont mean me but tbh that doesnt mean it doesnt hurt
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drew my ocs as riptide characters :3
#my post#my art#jrwi riptide#why does everyone have a Doomed Sister. my ocs only have 1 doomed sister that they have to share. everin cant be edyn lizzie AND ayva#i put ev as lizzie bcus. leading when you dont know what youre doing but feeling like you need to do it anyways because no one else will#also bcus i put kiet as chip and ev is closest to kiet#speaking of which kiet is chip bcus its just a little guy just a funny little guy#idunno man.#so nekaia also has some Chosen shit going on. not too clear on that i havent really expanded on religion in this story yet#yeag. and then theres nyota and stars jay bcus they both have Immesurable Guilt <3#oh andoras is caspian bcus hes bffs with everin <333#fun fact nyota kills her dad. maybe jay can follow in stars footprints ^_^#oh also nekaias coral looks like that bcus she has horns normally!!#kiets a bird and nyotas a moth and andoras is an elf. ev is also an elf but i dont think lizzie being human is plot relevant so she stayed#the same lol#anyways yaaaaay !!!!#i heart riptide. and also my funny ocs
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Fuck it. Jumping on the "Prove the Pansear Screenshots weren't Faked" bandwagon. Seeing so many people blindly cheer and reblog that callout post legitimately almost made me delete my blog in fear. I don't blame Pan for deleting at all and don't think that's automatic proof of guilt. No one cared about any potential victims, no one cared if someone got hurt, they just bragged about how "they've always known" and that's terrifying. If the screenshots turn out to be true i'll retract my statement and apologize, but for now im just scared for the rw community and where its headed because this isn't good
I know Im not really a creator in the rw fandom anymore (mostly due to stuff like this tbh) but if just one person sees this and feels safer and seen then i'll be happy
#rain world#pansear#rw drama#I know Im risking getting harassed for daring to speak out but I just can't stand it anymore#I don't even really support Pan I just hate seeing fandom spaces turn into shit like this#This is not hate at the person that posted the screenshots I just want to know for sure someone was actually guilty and not just bullied of#I dont want anyone to be harassed I just want clarity#Who gave you those screenshots? What was the server even about? Why did you hold onto the screenshots to post it at 'the right time' ?#Why did you share a screenshot of someone literally asking if your group if they had dirt on Pan? Why isn't anyone else questioning this?#And its stupid I should even have to fear harassment just for wanting more evidence#but ive already seen someone make a callout post trying to intimidate someone into shutting up about wanting proof#and thats not normal!!! If your truly wanting to see a bad person get away from your community you wouldn't be doing that??#hopefully I blocked enough people from that side of the fandom I wont get beaten to death but. Fucking. God
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gonna vent for a sec but im so tired of this "don't wanna be an inconvenience", people pleasing shit ngl.....do people who do this know that they just come off as really rude and like... it just feels insulting each time
#idk it's so upsetting and discouraging im really tired of it#like bro.... everyone can see what you're doing and#you doing it just communicates that you think im a fucking awful person#if im going to be fine with like someone... putting themselves down for the sake of others#or denying help because thay dont want to be an inconvenience#it just feels rude#if you don't think that i genuinely want to help you#if you think that I'm just fucking pretending or whatever then why are you even here I don't want#a friend who thinks these thoughts about me xd#like#how many times do i have to assure someone#i just feel like shit#it really just feels so shittyyyyyyy#comeonnnnn#people can SEE you people pleasing and doing all that shit#and everybody fucking hates it#it just makes me super uncomfortable and i know it also makes other ppl i know very uncomfortable also#on one hand I don't wanna mention anything to this person because trauma is trauma what the fuck am i#supposed to do about that its just a trauma response but god i have feelings too#i want that person to also consider me because it feels so awful it just taints every single interaction#because it makes me feel like they think im some awful person who's going to be fine#with them carrying all their stuff even though i offered like 5 times and them just pushing themselves aside so i have space#even though im offering to share#AURGHH#it feels so bad#i feel like this every time i spend time with this person or any other person who does this that i know enough to like#recognize the behavior#idk im just tired I can't be putting all my effort#into reassuring every single step it's just sucking all fun out of everything we do together it just feels like shit whatever
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originnssssss who remembers origins i Loved origins
#origins smp#i heard theres been like three failed origins revivals WHAT EVEN HAPPENED i was only there for the first one😅#beeduo#otubbo#oranboo#beeduo fanart#i rewatched some origins streams a little while ago oh my god theyre SO FUNNY#DUDE DOES ANUONE REMMEBER THAT ONE STREAM I COUDLNT FIND RHIS ONE STREAM#IR WAS LIKE THE ONE WHERE TUBBO WAS SINGING SUGAR BY MAROON FIVE and they were being really Funny thay shit h#ad me CRYING in 2021 Please i swear this happened imnot crazy but also they might have been separate streams actuallu i dont rememebr its#been wayyyyyyy too long#BUT IT HAPPENED I PROMISE Sorry i've been gone for a while ive been very busy lots of Things going on went to Six flags then jad a surprise#bday party then i had to buy shoes for prom then Go to prom and also i do figure skating and am out like every day idknt have Time im sorry☹#had a crepe yesterday it was sooooo goood im like learning to drive too that shit is boring as hell my dad kept gettign 😑 bc i couldn't stop#yawning DRIVING IS SO BORING its not my fault😭😭😭😭#ok what else ohhhh. y god i locked in SO HARD for this physics essay u guys dont even knowim getting ONE HUNDRED on that trust i just really#wanted to share ok i love you bge#WAIT ACTUALLT SORRU IM LIKE REMMEBERJNG THE ORIGINS STREAMS K WAYCHED#RANBOO WAS SO FUCKING FUNNT IN THOSE STREAMS TOO LIKE I REMEMBER NIKI WANTED TO SEE THEIR BASE and tubbo was like ooh maybe we can put like#water down here for you niki we need a water system and ranwas like Do we though?I WAD WAYCHING THAT .LIKE DAMMMNNNNNN OM LIKE GIGGLING WRIT#ING THIS RIGHT NOW I CAN HEARTHE CLIP HE DID NOTTT WANT HER IJNTHEIR BASE😭😭😭😭��😭😭😭😭#I NEED TO FIDN THAT STREAM WHERE IRS LIKE TOMMY AND JACK A D FHEHRE LOKE TALKING ABOUT DUOS AND THEN JACK SAYS THE MOST OUT OF POCKET SHIT I#VE EVER HEARD LKKE I LITERALLU HAD TK PAUSE. H PHONE AND BURST OUR LAUHJIMG MY JAW WAS ON THE FLOORRRRR DO U GUYS R EME ER WTF IM TLAKING AB#OUT IDK HOW TO FIND THESE STREAMS Oh my god u really Had to be there early 2021 that was liye the funniest era of mt life i wlild be#Tearing up from lauhjimg every day I MISS WAYCHING STREAMS LIVE CHAT WAS SO FUNNY I wishe it was archivedI WISH MORE STREAMERS KEPT CHAT ON#SCREEN i defiently understand why most didn't like Wyd when chats annouing ad hell but also Me 3 years later is interested in what the pub#lic had to say.... ok Now bye
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the constant mischaracterization of gale just exhausts me beyond belief
#so many ppl project onto him then take that as being his character like.....#first he's not an incel second he is not straight they are all canonically bi/pan third he just enjoys sharing his knowledge??/?? he is not#mansplaning y'all just throw around words for no reason#like if you dont like him ok i guess but don't use YOUR misinterpretation of him as canon#he's just such a beloved character to me and i'm so tired of how much ppl shit on him for no reason!!!!!!!!!!!!#even in the game like its so fucking mean to him in so many of the dialogue options and why???????? he's so tender and sweet and sincere#baldur's gate iii#baldur's gate 3#bg3 gale#bg3#gale x tav#gale dekarios#gale of waterdeep
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Based on my latest post I'm overjoyed that my moots (whether or not tumblr officially recognises them thx sideblog doing sideblog sht) and those who randonly stumble upon my shit are objectively some of the greatest people.
I love this weird corner I found myself in and the general mindset and views on things.
And I may be too scared nd socially awkward to approach anyone directly but be assured I'm on the sidelines rooting for folks in a very cutesy, very demure manner and y'all should feel loved.
#i expected stones to be thrown but i found understanding#what an odd thing to happen#either way even if larian fumbles and even if the purity culture swaps over here more based on us developments#i mean the tiktok ban#i shall try my best to keep the dove evermore rotten#while also indulging in the fluff y'all make#but mostly the later cuz i'm still scared of sharing whatever the fuck I've done to bg3 lmao#someone read it and even said it was good but the doubt refuses to leave#why is creativity like that why cant we just love ourselves and be confident and unapologetic about ourselves as a whole#yeah it may be shit but it was made with lots of blood sweat and love#why am i getting so profound about this what is wrong with me today#anyway someone wanna read how gortash and durge start a bitch fight with each other that never ended#and instead just festered for a few decades#including political sheming - somehow jealousy - inexplicably yearning and an overwhelming sense of tragedy and dread#cuz 40 years passed but nothing changed in fact its only starting to unravel more#'look at how far they've come and how theyre slowly slipping right back into being a monster' - the longfic#still dont know how the kid that was raised by them and a bunch more other idiots turned out as well adjusted as she is#i mean okay there may be some patricide but yk its family tradition atp#yeah okay ive absolutely lost the plot in my own tags now#anyway point stands y'all r cool nd feel loved
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can a girl ramble aboutthe way you can interpret so many parts of the propaganda and characterization of rhine by other the people/general populace of teyvat as people largely antagonizing neurodivergent traits without being chased with pitchforks and torches.
#FUCKKKK DSOMMEBODY HEAR ME.#YES. i know shes a not a good person.#but half the shit she's described with by other sources#is so obviouslye exaggerated based onwho she is and NOBODDIESSSS talking abt it#'cold and unfeeling' MY ASS. THIS WOMAN WAS TALKING ABOUT EATING MOLD FOR A GOOD FOUR PARAGRAPHS ITSNOT THAT DEEP#the way she clearly a ton of albedo's behaviours but i dont see anybodyyyyy talk about it and just demonize her for it#THE HEXENSUCCESORS ARE ALL PARELLELS TO THE HEXENLADIES. THATS THE POINT#THE FACT RHINE LARGELY MIRRORS ALBEDO IS NOT A COINCEDENCE OR WEIRD INTERPRETATION ON ANYONES END.#the fact many of the trait she CLEARLY shares with albedo are demonized... HELLO..............#mond propaganda book writer gets shot IMMEDIATELY#-> i dont know guys. Maybe its also the fact she's probably traumatized from the. yknow. CATACLYSM. that made her a worse than albed#just maybe!#its sooo established that neurodivergence leads people to cope with stress different... Hello............ can we talk about this.........#NO HATE. but if I wathced my nation got destroyed > and this loser twink knight said i should've protected everyone/ when even HE DIDNT/#i wouldd also spiral. AND THATS CLEARLY WAHT HAPPENED ON SOME LEVEL.#if you read her hexenbook excerpt she is. quite literallh just sarcastic. blunt. and not emotionally experessive#WHICH ALIGNS WITH THE EXAGGREATED TRAITS SHES LATER CHARACTERIZED AS???#she literally JUST got worse symptoms as a result of trauma. why are we playing it up like this. “Great Sinner” my ass she's a woman ins te#they're all sinenrs if you really think about it. THEYRE IN STEM#-> the way neurodivergent women are demonized for sooo many traits they have just because it doesn't fit the mold of being a 'good women'#NOBODY IS TALKING ABOUT THIS. ITS MOND#THEYRE NOTABLY. NOT ALWAYS DOING THE BEST. WITH FREEDOM AND GOOD OPINIONS BC OF VENTI'S ABSENCESSSSSSSSSSSSS#NOSHIT THIS TAKE WOULD COME FROM THEM..... MAKE SOME SENSEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE#this is no hate because i love mond with alll my heart im just fucking insane over this. venti i love you#crepe rants
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i wish finding people was easier
#never learned how. even when i was mandated to share a building with 400 of them i struggled making connections#idk what to do now. all i do is go to work or stay home. i really dont have anywhere else to go. at least not without spending money#and even if i DID have somewhere to go i dont want 10 million questions about 'where are you going? why do need the car? what if i need it?#my grandmother is SUFFOCATING to be around. she still pulls this shit with my mom too and shes in her 40s#im just. lonely. i feel bad saying i want friends cause i DO have friends. just. not in person#hell i like to have a partner adn ive NEVER had that as a priority before. but i dont know how to get there#and if i did have a partner; or friends; its not like i could take them home. im just stuck.#im struggling for independence and i have no way out
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oh god here
#ended up going with a doodle a friend requested#it was such a shit doodle though i dont think ive ever shared it before?? idk#maybe i did#idk why i would tho its like one of those sketches that has no features at all#anyway that was a long gap. i havent had time to do shit ABDHDBDBD#went to a wedding and been dealing w animals and heat and all that shit#i drew a head shot of host holly also as a warm up#but it's so basic hes just staring forward. nothin going on.#idk if I'll share that or not#brambleramble
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