#and in this case. talks a Lot
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you know what's so disappointing? the way people keep saying 'don't be afraid to portray mental illness and disability in media!! in your art and writing!!! normalise it and don't shun it!!!' and then the MOMENT you bring up a symptom that's too messy and uncomfortable to handle, they take a fuckin u-turn and go "UM no that's bad. like. you're a bad person if you do that. that's weird and it makes me uncomfortable so it's wrong."
here's the thing!!!!!!! it's not convenient!!!!! it's not simple!!!! i can't be honest and keep writing about how depression paints your whole world blue and all that shit!!!!!! because guess what!!!! depression and disabilities and borderline personality disorder and SO many other things are just. not neat and clean or easily consumable. they WILL make you uncomfortable and sad. they WILL make you feel bad. honesty is not easy. it's not meant to be.
and dehumanisation of sociopaths and psychopaths is genuinely distressing. not all of them!!! are!!!! bad people!!! it's a medical condition!!!! a mental illness!!! a person's illness doesn't make them bad. their actions and the decisions they take decide that and I am SO sick and tired of people watering down every complex human trait and toxic behaviour as good and bad and right and wrong. don't you see!!! some things are simply just. human. that's all. people fuck up. badly, sometimes. but that doesn't mean they are not people. I'm not saying you should forgive everyone and become a full time saint. you are entitled to your anger. i'm just asking you: don't take away a person's right to err and still be considered human. not all actions fall in the neat divisions of right and wrong. some things just are. grow some balls if you want to see true suffering in media. because it is Not easy or pretty. not even close. you will be conflicted and uncomfortable and troubled. make peace with that fact.
#PLEASE do not come at me with arguments regarding UHHHH BUT MURDERERS ABUSERS AND MOLESTERS ARE BAD PEOPLE#yes. yes they are.#i never said they weren't. read the post#i said actions define a person's morality#but they are not ALWAYS simply right and wrong#meaning right and wrong does exist but it doesn't have to be a thing all the time#grey area exists too#and so does good and bad#it's a complex thing#i've been thinking about my own intrusive thoughts and how i can maybe incorporate that in my writing#but i found myself backtracking and being like wait. what if people think i'm a bad person for this#then i got SO angry#I'M ALWAYS WALKING AROUND IN EGGSHELLS#like. how much is too much#how much violence can be romanticized and sexualized and not seen as it is????#when will my work stop being poetic and raw and vulnerable and turn into something you consider wrong?#it's a ticking time bomb#and i hate that#vi talks#and in this case. talks a Lot
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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again
#yeehaw#1k#5k#10k#posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference#edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense#also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags#1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now#he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic#2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign#like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock#3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing#it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is#extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once#it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life#i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about#Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect#if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it#aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week
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At a party and a guy was telling me about how one of his coworkers was complaining about how he thought his dealer was lacing his heroin with cocaine and then the party guy was like “but his dealer was his brother” and I said “that’s some cocaine and abel shit” and the joke flopped so hard but I stand by it so I had to share it somewhere
#drugs tw#in case anyone is wondering what the context was we were talking about kooky coworkers so this story was a lot to hear even in context
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Pro gamer move: transfem Pixal saved me from artblock (this is basically me drawing my own interpretation of Pixal from this post’s tags)
#ninjago#lego ninjago#ninjago pixal#pixal ninjago#pixal borg#I AM SO GAAHHHHHH#I LOVE HER SM THIS IS MY BEST HC YET#also mild redesign. it will probably change a lot i love drawing robots and their different body options#okay time for my art to disappear again for the next few days#ninjago cyrus borg#cyrus borg#ninjago zane#zane ninjago#zane julien#ninjago pixane#pixane ninjago#pixane#zane x pixal#ninjago headcanons#cable hcs#< i guess#transfem#transfem pixal#also that one of her talking to zane is when she was still in his head. just for clarification#i love making characters twinks who then go on to become buff as hell in case y’all can’t tell
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Instead of writing a fanfic like a normal person this oneshot turned into two separate, contextless things,
#sorry it’s how my brain works (sometimes can only see things in terms of tv scene-)#tumblr exclusive video fancy…#dcmk#my art#(quietly coughing and spluttering) OK alright I can feel the creative brain explosion slowing down. geez#coughs.#nyways. weird that there hasn’t really been a main case where poison is involved in a certain way#If I watch my own scribbled boards for too long im gonna get too embarrassed to post. Send post#Subarus hair is still infuriating by the way like take that off your normal hair is easier. The beanie is easier#you like Have to have the side corners on this haircut or it doesn’t look right#anyways. shiho ptsd moments I think she kind of gets irritated that shinichi doesn’t react the same so when he does she gets like#weirded out and vindicated and a little protective. Like woah wait. Love that you understand me rn don’t like that you feel bad I am going…#to…………. ssssssssssit here about it…………………………….. uhhhh. do you want. a rubix cube to get your mind off it#I don’t want to talk about my feelings I just want you to get it. you don’t wanna talk about your feelings either which is……………. Hmmmmmm#I like her. love of my life miyano shiho#masumi sera#conan edogawa#ai haibara#akai shuichi#let conan swear. HE SWEARS A LOT BUT LET HIM SWEAR IN ENGLISH I KNOW HE KNOWS THEM#man needs his emotional support akai family they like him#rigorous trials to being approved by the akai matriarch but everyone else likes him already and have already picked him up multiple times#and shuichi would let him swear
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色彩 [Shikisai]
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#itafushi#fushiita#yuji itadori#megumi fushiguro#fanart#jjk fanart#megumi#yuuji#finally...some not angst.....#im worried out of my mind fr these two right abt now but we cope we cope :)#i woke up early n rushed to render this bc im leaving 2 catsit today n wont b able to spend every waking hour drawing like i have been#almost uploaded it without rendering megumi's ear and frgetting the sukuna scars so im sure ill find something i missed once i hit post smh#this pose fought me also >:( sighs why when i try to do not angst they do not want to cooperate . do they prefer being hurt#anyway !!!#i dont think any1 Listens when ppl put song links in the caption but if anyone is curious ! colours/shikisai galileo galilei#SO themcore im unwell i say that a lot but i mean it every time#speaking of colours i Love how these turned out but they ended up being a lot more cohesive than i intended GKHSDFK#wanted to have yuuji in warm and megumi in cold but that appears to have blended everywhere but their uniforms Oops#sighs these 2 and their sun/moon imagery r my cause of death. i die thinking abt it#resisted the urge 2 have a lmhs caption but let it b known. i amn Thinking it.#anyway i say ill b away from my drawing tablet but i fully plan 2 uber home one of the days so i can draw#i cant b slacking now the itfs reunion is nigh and i feel nauseous abt it i need to channel the nervous energy#have sketches.......just in case....but we dont Talk abt just in case >:(#itfs nation hold strong <3
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Destiel Pride - Day 21; Most faithful mirror
#destiel pride#dean winchester#castiel#destiel#destiel art#spnfanart#wiggleart#I forgot this is a line in the Massive Attack song Teardrop haha but yeah I#thought about things that encompassed the whole song but I just then thought about mirrors and how it shows you yourself#and how Dean and cas faced similar issues specifically daddy issues lol#and family issues#and this scene from 4.16 was one of my favorites of theirs and imo one of their most important scenes that got them on the same page#this is the same episode cas is beginning to experience doubt#Dean tells him not to disappear on him while he’s talking to him#and how they both didn’t become the fathers wanted#well in cas’s case… Angel lol#so yah#idk this scene is really emotional to me and I think thee point in time cas starts to feeeeeeeel#idk. I love this scene a lot lol
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Building on the favourite animal ask, another Very Important Question: favourite PREHISTORIC animal? And why? (I've always loved gorgonopsids and pterosaurs like anurognathus, but a new favourite is aquilolamma the eagle shark. They're just very cute).
I feel like my top favorites are pretty pedestrian, but I like prehistoric deer a lot!
Megaloceros giganteus aka Irish elk
Sinomegaceros ordosianus & Sinomegaceros yabei
Eucladoceros dicranios
Cervalces scotti
#they're so big why are they so big#imagine seeing an irish elk in the wild#or a herd of them#I also like long-horned bison#it's hard to imagine the good old mammoth without experiencing some type of awe and reverence#a few years ago there was a a lot of talk about spinosaurus possibly being a good swimmer and I really loved that idea personally#the looong torso & tail short limbs and quadrupedal posture made it look so sleek and crocodilian#I have no idea if that theory holds any water but I think they'd be my favorite dinosaur in any case#answered#anonymous
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so much supernatural discourse boils down to claiming a thing we actually see dean do on the show is something he would not do, claiming a thing we see dean specifically not do on the show is something he would do, claiming something all the main characters do is something dean alone is doing, or claiming something sam does on the show is something dean did.
and im so confused. because the answer is comically simple and it's a thing we all allegedly love doing and that is... watching supernatural?
#you have invented a man to be angry with but i have never seen this man before in my life?#and i dont mean like left up to interpretation shit#i mean like claiming dean always hates monsters and sam always supports them#or like how people totally memoryhole dean criticizing john#and sam often defending him#shit like dean sam and cas all having a plan to kill and or lock jack away at various points#like please just rewatch the show#or maybe watch it for the first time cough cough#a few weeks ago on twitter people were yelling at me because dean kills demon vessels with the knife#and none NONE of them listened when i was like... well literally all of them kill demon and angel vessels like... a lot.... ?#me: enjoying watching and talking about supernatural#versus#some people: enjoying *talking* about supernatural#many such cases
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my hand slipped
#fei draws#team ranchers#rancher duo#tangotek#jimmy solidarity#solidaritygaming#solidaritek#trafficshipping#<- just in case tags but interpret however u want#trafficblr#traffic smp#i don’t talk about it a lot but i genuinely love ranchers#i just think they’re a silly pairing /pos#maybe i’ll draw them happy at some point#there’s also no context to this#this all occurred to me while doing maths
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Foreshadowing I’ve Found for THAT Reveal
Spoilers for the Season 1 finale under the cut!!!
HI GUYS HOW ARE WE FEELING WOW
I’ve spent the weeks in between the fast pass release and now rereading and looking for every bit of foreshadowing I could find for B- I mean Nox… being a key. (Or at least key adjacent)
Side Note: I’m playing fast and loose with the definition of foreshadowing here. Some are pretty small details or silly observations, but my list my rules :P
So here it is compiled in a massive (vaguely chronological) list with numbered photos!
Also if there’s anything I missed (I’m sure there is) please add it!!
———
1) The literal first scene of the comic is a crescent moon (in a purple background), which we now know is Nox/the villain key’s symbol
2) (Ep. 13) Nox knows “plenty about the keys.” uh yeah I bet you would
3) (Ep. 13) Chase asks if Nox is part of Ex Libris and wants to make the keys more miserable, which seems to make him really upset. It’s understandable, I’d be pretty upset if I was implied to be working with my tormentors to make my own life even worse.
4) (Ep. 13) From the start Nox assumes Chase wants the keys for something selfish. Considering Ex Libris treats the keys like objects, and some of the keys (like Bronze) are pretty weary around people, that’s not an unreasonable assumption. Nox is so accustomed to being used by higher ups for selfish wishes
—This puts his outburst in Ep. 31 in a whole new light, specifically the line about Chase wanting to befriend the keys. He’s so convinced that couldn’t be true because it’s never been true for him.
5) Each of the keys has a specific junk food/snack they like. Silver has cheese, Bronze has peanut butter, Goldie has gummies, and it seems Nox has chocolate :]
6) (Ep. 20) “Every last thing” about the keys is his business in his words
—Guess that includes himself
7) Metals can rust, and Nox isn’t a fan of water (besides baths, but I assume that’s because he can control when he goes in and for how long)
8) When you stick a key in a book, they automatically know the story (as said by Bronze in Ep. 21). This explains why Nox seems to know a book’s plot no matter what
9) (Ep. 28) He says that the keys can take advantage of “certain loopholes.” In that moment, this is a reference to what characters a key can use for their role. But it could also be a nod to how keys can technically use other keys to enter stories. He’d know that since it’s what he’s been doing this whole time.
10) In the infamous “They feed you, right?” scene (Ep. 29), we’ve always kind of assumed that — yeah — Ex Libris just doesn’t feed him often. But in this scene, Chase ALSO says “keep you locked up.” I have a feeling that’s actually what Buddy got upset about. Ex Libris probably did keep him locked up as a key, which has to be really traumatic considering his severe claustrophobia.
11) (Ep. 31) Nox assumes Chase’s wish is just as “self-serving” as his is, which we now know is to be human again.
—(Nox actually projects a lot of his own feelings onto Chase, I’ll talk about that some other time though.)
—Referring back to number 5, during this whole confrontation, Nox is convinced that Chase only wants Narratonin for a wish. As a key, of course he’d think that, because that’s all that the humans usually around him want.
12) ”Nobody should have to accept being the villain if they’re trying their best not to be.” (Ep. 30) and “I get it, you’re the villain around here…” (Ep. 32)
—He literally IS the villain
—(Also I didn’t have room to include it, but Nox gets a really sad look on his face after Chase says that last line. yikes..)
13) (Ep. 32) In response to Chase talking about trusting humans, Nox says “them.” He could’ve said something like ‘people’ or ‘anyone,’ but his wording here implies that he sees human beings as separate from himself.
14) The crescent moon necklace on his outfit in Sick Days, as well as the half-ones on his jacket. If you really think about it you could also count the gemstones near his eyes as representing his gem eyes.
—It’s maybe a little strange that this outfit is the one he decided to make so similar to his key form. But it makes sense considering the previous arc was Beach Boys, where Nox became more trusting of Chase
15) (Ep. 35) He’s never been sick because keys can’t get sick.
16) (Ep. 36) He says “real people�� and “person,“ showing again how he might not think of himself as either of those. (See number 13)
17) (Ep. 39) There’s a lock on Nox’s coffin
18) (Ep. 39) I originally thought it was the lighting but nope, his ear is literally gray! Also his hair here is less spiky at the ends, like how it is in his key form
19) (Ep. 39) He looks surprised by his reflection, because he’s only used to seeing his human form while in the books.
—In fact, since you can’t see yourself in the book mirrors, when’s the last time he saw himself as a human?
20) (Ep. 39) The broken key-ring looking thing around his neck
21) (Ep. 49) “Good, that means I’m taller than someone for once.” if only you knew, Chase..
22) The entirety of Ep. 50 confirming that keys can go into books
23) (Ep. 53) He gets really pissy over the idea of his teeth being “baby”. Might be carry over from his grudge against being like 5 inches tall in reality
24) (Ep. 53) His claustrophobia could stem from being stuck in his key form and being put in a box for weeks or months at a time.
—He keeps repeating that he just needs to “wait it out” and “it’s fine�� because that’s all he could do and think as a key
25) (Ep. 54) “That moon is too close” following the scene where Buddy decides to lower his guard and work on his harmful behaviors. We now know the symbol of the villain key is the moon, so it could be Nox trying to distance himself from his role as the villain.
26) (Ep. 55) The crescent moon on Bad Cat’s lapel
27) (Ep. 56) “Some people are very good at disguising their true nature” in reference to Nox. It’s quite literal, in this case.
28) All the characters’ eyes are drawn in a very specific way, no matter their color (black shading taking up half the iris, the white shine). Every character except Nox, that is.
—Well, every character except Nox and the key’s human forms. I always thought it was meant to make him seem more intimidating (which it Does), but it really might be a byproduct of being a key. The queen in Friends and Family (Ep. 56) almost has Nox’s exact eye color, and her eyes are still colored in the usual way. So it’s definitely more than a stylistic choice.
—Makes me wonder what Nox looked like pre-key form. ..Did he still have his bright blue high beams..
29) Dreams by Day is about a key having a dream/flashback, and Dreams by Night is.. also about a key having a dream/flashback
———
And that’s all I have for now!! I’m absolutely going to find something else the millisecond I post this but like u said please add anything you notice.
#now the floodgates have opened and I talk about so much stuff get ready#hold on punko posted a really cute drawing as I’m writing this wait I was ready#**WASNT#cinderella boy#cinderella boy webtoon#buddy cinderella boy#I’ll add his real name in later just in case#j talks a lot
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“he was mentally ill. this monster was a- was a sick fantasy. a product of his dementia.”
“…i saw it too. does that make me disturbed? demented? does… that make me sick too?”
#txf#the x files#dana scully#fox mulder#folie a deux#this episode … this EPISODE!!!!!!#genuinely so indicative of how much they trust each other….#between mulder just . having to rely on scully for the last part of the ep#scully thinking he’s off his fucking rocker and still looking into what he asks her to look into bc she TRUSTS him . bc she LOVES him !!!!#and maybe he’s a little nuts but goddamnit she will at least check it out !! just in case he’s right!!!#AND she lies for him all the time . i mean she always does this whenever he decides to go nuts But specifically in this ep…#looks skinner in the eye and goes . yea man im totally fully with mulder on this . and he’s definitely not being weird and i definitely kno#what’s going on with him#she lies for mulder all the time its soooo…#anyways . drawing wise this drove me nuts i hate drawing mulder . he’s so hard for me to draw#they’re kinda kirie and shuichi coded in the bottom part but . well . why not . might as well be#ALSOOO i chose that quote for the bottom bc . well . does she think he’s crazy? like actually for real?#i feel like every time scully talks about mulder (up to season five at least as thats where im at) its contained in some way?#in her reports . to family . to skinner . to mulder !#i think the only time she’s Really honest is in the confessional but even then…#bc its not like she’s against speaking her mind . i mean generally and situational but for ppl she’s close to she usually isnt#but when it comes to mulder it always feels contained and like she’s making excuses for him (he is always her exception .#llike whenevrr he gets some disease or affliction or whatever she ALWAYS jumps to going ‘but well… sometimes there’s this excuse’ and she#does this w a lot considering shes science focused but w mulder shes always like . well he ISNT crazy because uhhhh .#this hyperspecific scenario that is in no fuckin way the case)#but does she think he’s crazy? does HE think she thinks he’s crazy?#is he asking about this specific case or is he asking in general? over the entirety of the show?#its been five years scully. is he crazy? sick? demented?#has this all been a sick fantasy fueled by mental illness? youre the doctor scully . surely you have the answer?#anyways i dont think she knows . and if that is the case — what does that mean for her?
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something something one of those those "Jango falls for Courtesan/Stripper/NightclubSinger/TrophyWife!Obi-Wan" AUs...
But instead Obi-Wan actually being a sex worker, he's undercover and still a Jedi, and either:
They split ways and run into each other a few months later with Obi-Wan in full Prude Beige Knight mode OR
The situation goes pear-shaped while they're still flirting and Obi-Wan has to break cover to grab a senator and jump out a window and suddenly this half-dressed glittery Person is batting away shots with a lightsaber and there's a bratty twelve-year-old who ALSO has a lightsaber threatening people with I Will Eat Your Liver if they keep staring at his dad's ass just because the sequined sheathe dress tore in a sexy place
#jangobi#jango fett#obi wan kenobi#anakin skywalker#star wars#phoenix talks#undercover au#undercover as sex worker#to be clear: I do enjoy sex worker AUs both as a form of entertainment and in their surprising weight in normalization of sex work#they've done an unprecedented amount of work humanizing the profession#for sheltered young people who might have otherwise needed a lot longer to get over their prejudices#and while in my case I started on that path of Recognizing People As People through reading firsthand accounts by sex workers online#the impact that sex worker AUs have had on that whole situation is not to be dismissed#but also they're just fun to read? they're entertaining in the way any profession-based AU can be#I'm just as eager to read a sex work AU as I am to read a senator AU or racer au or college professor au etc#...anyway I just realized that the original post could theoretically be read as 'sex worker AUs bad' and I don't want anyone to think that
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[RHETORIC - Legendary 14]: Convince Kim you are in a timeloop.
(ISAT side of the swap)
#disco elysium#harry du bois#kim kitsuragi#ISAT#in stars and time#If you put HDB in a timeloop I truly think he would spend the his time trying to convince Kim he was in one.#The extra funny bit here is how counter it is to the *main plot of ISAT (*I HAVENT FINSHED. JUST STARTED ACT 4)#In which Siffrin is so strongly against letting anyone know they are trapped in a timeloop.#HDB would be doing everything in his power to try and get people to believe him.#and just like with the amnesia talk - Kim would pull the 'Detective we have a case to solve. Can we get back to work?' card.#How long would HDB last in a timeloop? If we make this loop the week that the case is...maybe a dozen loops?#He has the mystical detective angle on his side so I think he would stumble into the solution eventually.#Now. Odile could figure out someone is in a timeloop. I think It would take a *lot* for Kim to believe.#Anyways. [clicks on my powerpoint presentation that reads “Why Madame Odile could solve the deathnote case”]
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just saw a bad take I need to smash and kill with a rock
#Look. Ok. I get that a lot of media last minute forces two people into a heterosexual couple. Not the case with Klaus 😭😭😭#Not to be that guy. But. Please stop being yaoi brained for a minute. Please#I mean. Am I grasping at straws here. They had bonding moments. Writing with the saami girl. Walking around the changed island. They had th#Same initial scary person dynamic as Klaus did! And then softening because of each other#There are cathedrals for those with eyes to see#Saying they have no chemistry is a HUGE stretch. Please quit the undermining woman characters to build up mlm please please#Chatterbomb#THEY WERE SO CUTE WHEN THEY WERE DECORATING THE CAROUSEL TOGETHER!!! WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!!!!!
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had to do poster making as an exercise and the theme was superheroes, so of course i drew mr. vengeance for it🦇
#this isnt the poster version ofc its just the drawing i did for it on its own#im not that happy with the poster version but i had a lot of fun drawing this and thats all that matters to me <3#im not a graphic designer anyway im an illustrator at heart. and my illustrator heart is super happy how this turned out#i dont think i ever mentioned it here but i love the batman 2022 its one of my favorite movies of all time :)#thats a yap session for another day though ill talk abt it in a post separate from this. maybe#allyart#the batman 2022#batman#bruce wayne#cw // eye strain#putting that just in case bc i know the red shows up super saturated on some screens and the contrast with the black is a lot#its like blindingly red on my phone but its fine on my laptop LMAO#anyways ill be going now 🏃➡️
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