#and getting this out of the way makes it feel fair to post again so i might be able to actually make something with all this soon

[live-fast-pet-frogs]

Helluva Dads, and why Blitzø is better than Stolas

This post is not a Stolas hate post in any way, I think this is just an interesting perspective on the main characters of Helluva boss as parents, mainly Blitzø and Stolas. If you want to avoid spoilers please skip.

The latest episode has brought up some speculations on how the trailer snippet from this seasons (meant for the next episode) will be about Octavia growing resentful of Stolas and thinking that he has abandoned her.

I have seen some posts claiming that Via is a spoiled rich kid and that she is demanding so much from her father, some posts even going as far as saying she is exactly like Stella. I disagree with these takes heavily because Stella is a one dimensional villain, portrayed to have no other function than to be Stolas' abuser. Octavia is actually extremely valid in her feelings and she has more than enough reason to resent Stolas.

If you noticed, every single Octavia centric episode portrays the same conflict between father and daughter: Octavia feeling like an afterthought and worrying that Stolas will leave her for Blitzø.

This has been featured in "Loo Loo Land" where Octavia is exasperated by the fact that even when Stolas plans a whole day for the two of them to spend time together (even by disregarding Via's feelings about the theme park), he still spends most of his time flirting with Blitz, whom he invited along just for the sake of it as there has been zero need for them. At the end of the episode, Stolas apologies for not hearing Via out, promises that he won't ever abandon her and the two head home with their conflict resolved.

Or not....

In "Seeing Stars" Octavia runs away to the human world because Stolas forgot about their promise to watch a meteor shower that they have been looking forward to seeing since she was a toddler. Stolas spends his day arguing with Stella over their divorce and ignoring his daughter. I just want to say it's not Stolas' fault that he is stressed because of his divorce and his ex wife is making the whole process harder for him but ultimately his daughter should take priority over anything else in his life. A parent should put their child first, always.

Enter Blitzø:

He has his fair share of faults, and he infantalises Loona often but at the end of the day, she know he will be there for her and she will be there for him. She knows Blitz cares for her a lot, and she never doubts that or expresses feeling neglected (i mean also because of her background).

Blitzø also puts his daughter even before Stolas, as seen in Western Energy. He has to take Loona to her doctors appointment and even though Loona is a grown adult at this point, he knows she gets super anxious around shots so he insists on accompanying her, even when Stolas tells him that he has been kidnapped. Blitz sends M&M in his stead, because Loona takes priority.

The main difference between Loona and Octavia is how much their parents wanted them.

Both Stolas and Blitzø love their daughters and want the best for them. However I can't help but think that the main reason in how they are treated is the fact that one of them was unwanted.

Stolas loves his daughter, that is undeniable and before Blitz re-entered his life Octavia was probably the only person in his life who made him happy. But he didn't want her. Everything in Stolas' life until the main plot has been decided for him, and he has done everything he did out of obligation: his job, his marriage and his heir. Paimon has decided that he will marry Stella when Stolas was a small child, and they were expected to produce an heir as soon as possible. Stolas most likely became a father against his will at an age where he was barely an adult and unprepared to raise a child. And that is not even mentioning the fact that he is gay.

This is not his fault, again. But it is the main reason why he always tries to escape his life and obsesses over Blitzø, ultimately including Octavia in the multitude of things he is running away from. Via is extremely entangled in the "list of chores" Stolas has to do, while Blitzø represents the freedom of choice for him.

Even so, it feels like Stolas is running the same circles around his daughter throughout the story, which is: Stolas neglects Via, Via feels sad and abandoned, they have a wholesome discussion that Stolas won't ever abandon Via and he loves her a lot, 2 seconds later Stolas is off chasing cock.

At the end of Mastermind, Via is seen visibly upset, probably thinking that his father left her behind for Blitzø again. She feels betrayed by him over and over again, and she is right because Stolas, despite making promises still disregards Via's thoughts and feelings at the end of the day.

Stolas is absolutely devastated when he realises that he might not see his daughter again, that he has lost custody over her. But it's too little too late, and while in this particular case it was completely justified that he went to save Blitzø from literally being executed, maybe Via would be taking it better if she wasn't left behind by Stolas over and over again.

Meanwhile Blitzø finally manages to connect with Loona on a deeper level by proving to her that he will always prioritise her safety and will die for her if it comes to that. It was the last push for Loona to completely lower her guard and actually allow herself to express outward affection towards her father.

And I think this progress could only happen because Blitzø has never given Loona a reason to feel left behind. This can also be a reason of introspection on Blitz' part as he adoped Loona after seeing himself in her. They had similar childhoods, full of abuse and neglect, and he was determined to make sure Loona won't have to feel that way with him around.

Unfortunately Stolas has suffered so badly from his depression and loneliness that even by trying his best he has subjected Octavia to the same loneliness he is desperately trying to escape. I hope that instead of resentment, he can learn from Blitzø on how to be a better parent, and also to take care of himself as well. I hope he and Octavia can reunite at some point, but Stolas will need to work more consciously on being there for his daughter.

[stari-hun]

Anya is such a complicated character cause I get her reasoning for telling Curly alone to keep her safe and hoping to safely have an intervention before any of it blew up or likely risking the Pony Express’ token collective corporate punishment and risking everyone’s job. But also Curly is absolutely at fault for not working more to protect her or thinking that she needs protection. He’s like the embodiment of “oh I believe you but… I know him, he doesn’t seem like that kind of guy”. We all fear Jimmy, but everyone’s met a Curly, and that’s a huge part of the horror with it. The Tulpar Crew is VERY realistic.

I don’t think he fully does the psych eval for Anya specifically because of her mental state. Mostly because she isn’t a very frail person? It’s a product of aftermath from what Jimmy did that makes her so nervous, and when he’s the narrator I don’t think we can really guarantee Anya is as jumpy and unstable as he sees her. Jimmy is VERY unreliable as a narrator and it’s not only in dialogue and what he images for Curly, it’s also visual hallucinations as well. The way he interprets stuff is to paint those he feels against him in a bad light and to make himself a hero. I also don’t think Curly is purely ignorant. I said it in another post too when I was spamming but this isn’t Jimmy’s first offense either. He’s done something like this before or similarly violent, and they had to move communities entirely off EARTH. Curly is absolutely apart of a brotherhood that protects Jimmy over keeping him in check. Sure he means well and wants to let everyone live a happy life, but it’s the same kind of concept as a teacher who insists on “fairness” to everyone when sometimes giving everyone the same treatment is inherently UNfair. He also sees Jimmy’s psych eval on the same way he sees his, as long as someone can vouch for him that he’s ok it should be fine, right? It’s another part of patriarchy that works against men this time, Curly can’t talk about how he feels even to professional but he can when another man he’s close with supports and validates him through it. But that same system is also what makes him morally grey instead of misguided.

Why does Jimmy know exactly the amount of pure ethanol he’d need to knock out someone even with an extremely high tolerance? He’s not an alcoholic himself, and saying it was in the past is a jump since Swansea would’ve offered him to relapse since the chances of survival are so low. Why does he know how to drug someone so well? Why did they HAVE to leave earth? What was so bad that made them need to get off the planet for a fresh start? Curly isn’t into psychology whatsoever, but there’s a straight line between SA and murder, and it’s not long at all. He also didn’t need any knowledge in a formal subject to know if a person commits a violent act that they can do it again. He protects Jimmy because he wants to believe that he’s good but doing bad, but in reality he’s just looking at himself. In the aim to preserve the entire picture he’s missed the dead pixel in the corner.

Rewatching Mouthwashing is so fun cause there's so many new things each time you get more context and awareness. Like there's so much foreshadowing and warning signs even down to like the psych eval proving that Jimmy was a completely incapable part of the staff. Curly is combative to the eval on his own just not wanting to open up about his feelings, a pretty common thing with patriarchy working against men's emotional state, but Jimmy actively renders Anya unable to do her job because he harasses her. It shows that he's a problem, and targets her specifically within the crew despite everyone else reasonably being standoffish with Daisuke who he readily accepted. I think the evals between them are really good foreshadowing I didn't notice at first, Curly has his own flaws but overall he fits the standards and expectations of a Captain, but Jimmy renders other people entirely unable to work because of his own incompetence and violence.

[msilwrites]

The "What Would You Take?" Conversation (Captain Price Fic)

Mama Bear's Question. Captain Price x You (Y/N)

Possessive! John Price, Possessive! Price, Retired! John Price. Implied Big Boss in SpecGru! John Price, Boss!Price Boss in SpecGru! Price. OMG Evil Genius! John Price Diabolical! John Price

John Price x Y/N, John Price x Reader, Captain Price x You

A/N: This idea was because a reel of this sort, did pop-up in my feed. And the answers were, like the one below. LOL, and for some reason, John Price came into mind. Enjoy this one, cheers!

The kitchen was cozy, the dessert you’d baked earlier now almost gone. John leaned back in his chair, watching you scroll through social media, a soft chuckle escaping your lips now and then.

“What’s funny this time?” he asked, curiosity piqued.

You turned the screen toward him, showing a trending video. “It’s this reel trend, where couples ask what they’d take if they broke up or divorced.”

John’s brow furrowed, his lips curving into a skeptical smirk. “Break up, divorce, huh? Not happening.”

“Humour me, John!” you teased, laughing at his seriousness. “So? What would you take?”

He didn’t miss a beat. “EASY!! Your skincare and makeup. Every last bit of it.”

Your eyes widened and blink at him, baffled. “Excuse me? What are you going to do with my skincare? Use my serums and exfoliate your beard?”

He chuckles, his tone as casual as if he were discussing the weather. “So you couldn’t leave the house. If I’m not seeing that pretty face, no one else is.” he says playfully, leaning closer with that signature smirk.

You couldn’t help but burst out laughing. “John, that’s ridiculous! I’d just replace them!”

“Replace?” His fork clinked against the plate as he set it down with purpose. “D’you know how much that stuff costs? Your cleanser alone could pay for a decent takeaway. And don’t get me started on that serum... or the fancy sunscreen.”

You blinked, your smile faltering as realization dawned. “Wait… how do you know that?”

“I pay attention,” he replied casually, though the glint in his eyes gave him away.

“You’ve been researching my skincare routine?” you asked, your voice rising as you gulped.

John leaned forward, his tone all too natural. “You think I wouldn’t notice what’s important to you? Or what you pack every time you stay over?” He leaned back again, smug. “I just made a few… observations.”

Your cheeks flushed, a mix of surprise and embarrassment. “John! That’s not fair!”

“Fair?” he repeated, finishing the last bite of his dessert with a satisfied hum. “What’s fair is me making sure you don’t run off lookin’ irresistible to anyone else.”

You groaned, burying your face in your hands. “You’re impossible.”

“And yet,” he countered, standing to take the plate to the sink, “you keep coming back every time. Wonder why that is, love?”

There was no way to respond to that—not without admitting he might have a point. His confidence, frustrating as it could be, left you feeling oddly reassured. Because deep down, you knew—he wasn’t just making observations. He was making it clear: no matter the hypothetical question or scenario, it wasn’t happening—because you were his, and nothing was going to change that.

A/N: Might do a next short for this one, who knows, maybe when something pops up soon! I'll post it quick. Hope you enjoyed this one, cheers!

[delulupunk]

omg i love the backwards romance one!! its very refreshing to see a morally gray y/n (maybe even straight up toxic) in jason’s part.

can we get more of that dynamic? love your work!!! <3333

Thank you so much, I really appreciate comments like this about my work!

I’d recommend reading my original post here if you haven’t already.

Jason wasn’t sure how he found himself in this position… again. But coming home battered and bruised was starting to become his norm. He knew his moves weren’t getting sloppy and he certainly wasn’t complacent. Something else must be on his mind, if only he could pin point it. Thoughts were like imposters in his mind, they never seemed to come from one source. The sweet innocence of Robin still wished to be heard, but the Lazarus pit screamed.

He knew you’d still be awake. Save for the few times you hadn’t been at the start of the relationship. It seemed that you had his schedule nailed down to a T. Which was odd considering he didn’t even known his own schedule.

Jason finds himself tiptoeing into the room, it shouldn’t be like this. Why does he hide from you? Maybe it’s because he’s scared. A man like him was scared of a person who was in love with him, or so they claimed. Each waking moment with you was starting to turn sour.

He heard the soft flutter of the shower and he sighed. You truly were a scary thought. He ought to confront you, he really should. After all it’s not fair to harbour such doubts when you treat him so well. His little robot-like lover. Everything with you seemed like a preplanned response.

If he had to bet on what you’d do today he knows he’d win a jackpot.

Lost in a haze of longing and disappointment Jason finds himself muttering the words he’ll know you’ll say soon. “Oh I didn’t hear you, aren’t you quiet?” Then you’ll come over and rub his shoulders, digging into the blades just the way he liked. So relaxing, so domestic, so safe….

The shower clicks off and Jason braces himself, secretly he feared he was stuck in a loop. Maybe that’s why you were so monotonous to live with.

“Jason! I didn’t hear you, aren’t you quiet?”

Well in his mind that’s basically the same thing he thought you’d say.

He grunts unceremoniously, turning away from you as he cleans his guns. What he really wants is for you to pull him closer and surprise him, he had plenty of reminders of why he fell in love with you every time you spoke. The difficult part was trying to hold onto that love.

Please, just do something different. Scream in my face, tell me to care more, I don’t care just make it stop!

“You look tired.” That soothing siren tone ripples across the bedroom and he wants to cry from frustration. Because the words are so simple and true, but he needs you to make a misstep. Are you even human?

“How about I make you some tea?”

His eyes widen and he stills like a photo. He’d finally got it, that mistake he was chasing. He hated tea and you hadn’t known it.

“Not my thing darling.” Jason muttered gruffly, not able to contain the smirk spreading across his face. The loop was broken, maybe finally he’d feel love for you again! This time it would feel like exploration rather than just an educated guess. You’d have to work him out, that’s all he wants.

“Oh.” He can hear the frown in your voice, see the furrowing in your eyebrows and sense the displeasure in your veins. He knows what’s on your mind- that need for perfection, and how had he figured this out? Because it was plaguing his mind too.

[dykedvonte]

(abt my last ask) thank you for the answer, your understanding of charas is trully stellar!

I wanted to ask, what's your take on recovery!au (unless you intend to cover it in your fic)? In the universe, where Jimmy happens, but the crew somehow survives. Everyone is traumatised, Anya is pregnant, Curly is disabled (could he even be able to afford disability aids? Pony express in no more, would they even be paid a sufficient compensation?). There is also a question of p*lice investigation (or whatever agency is responsible for space crimes), even more trauma... Man, it's bleak.

-💀

I like them sad but for emotional and physical recovery reason rather than all the actual legal stuff that would ensue.

I like when Swansea relapsing is explored and Daisuke losing a little bit of his light. I am clearly a big supporter of Anya and Curly remaining close friend after but I think exploring the unhealthy dynamics of the trauma bond they’d develop should be played with way more. I think it’s a bit annoying when people are on the nose about Anya telling Curly he should’ve done more, especially when he’s struggling through recovery.

I feel like people really want her to be a character to rub salt into wounds, just to give her something cathartic, but it’s just OOC for me. It’s not a kindness thing but I don’t think she wants that sort of guilt to stay with him like that? He did not do what Jimmy did, he could’ve done more to stop it but she would not intentionally try to direct what she can never take out towards Jimmy at Curly. At least when they all make it out. This is not to say she doesn’t think he shouldn’t have any remorse but she understands that no one else could have foreseen Jimmy crashing the ship or getting that bad.

I like when it gets psychoanalytic in fics with the crew. Talk about Curly finally opening up on details on how he and Jimmy were friends, have the others realize how bad Jimmy was to even Curly, not a lot of people realize that they don’t know how Jimmy was to him. Have Anya be angry and snippy, have her worry she’s becoming like Jimmy even though she could never be like him, it’s that fear though, that she is owed that cathartic release and may take it out on others in some selfish subconscious desire to reclaim control for herself. Have her actualize-herself, is med school the only option? What does she want now? Does Swansea divorce his wife, give up on the life he created because he was just following the path of a good man, one he didn’t believe? Or does he stay and use the time he has left to make it something he believes in. How is Daisuke? Is he more mature or does he lose a little light? What are his new aspirations if any? His relationship with his parents?

Ultimately, I think a recover au should really focus on just them actually getting to know each other and filling themselves. So much of their interactions were likely based on coworker dynamics first. With that out the window they are now people who can’t really move on from each other but need to move on in life.

[eddiemunsonsmum]

Just saw this comment on a story posted a month ago.

*cries in Eddie Munson Solo Series no one wanted to read, interact with or request for*

No shade to the person that commented this on their own fic if you recognize it. It's not their fault. I'm not mad at them. More crying in the tags.

[wings-of-waffles]

Hello there, fellow Farsight enjoyer. I have enjoyed your characterization and ideas about Farsight, and if it does not inconvenience you too much, could you tell me a little about what you think her and Mastermind's relationship was like? I personally agree with the fact that they were close, and I agree with how they both had respect for each other's knowledge and intelligence and academics in the other fanfictions. Yet, there's a lot that puzzles me with their relationship, like how Mastermind claimed correctly for years that Starflight was his, yet Farsight refused to say it in Prisoners, and then 2 years later they're seen standing next to each other in the prologue of Moon Rising. From some speculation (piecing together mentioned events from The Dark Secret, Prisoners, and Moon Rising), I have figured out that Mastermind and Farsight must have had some sort of interaction in 5004 A.S. to conceive Starflight, but she's noticeably absent from Prisoners when Fierceteeth is 7 in 5010 A.S., and then she's already dead for a few years by 5011 A.S. That means that they would have known each other for a few years in that timeframe. What do you think the course of their relationship was like? You mentioned that it was going downhill for a while, and I'd like to hear your take on it. Thank you for also receiving my speculation. It's very nice that you and I both are Farsight enjoyers on here.

Hi and sorry it took me so long to respond! I've been a bit creatively bankrupt lately and had to sum up the energy to digitally infodump. (and then it took me like a month or five because i took so long that i kept psyching myself out :p) But! I have Thoughts about this!! Even if it's been like a month or more since I've posted to this damn website!

I've never actually thought about it in terms of a timeline before, considering I do most of my thinking in pre-canon limbo and applying like. A human-ish timeframe to things. Still, the canon course of events wouldn't disrupt my idea of them too much- if anything, it brings a lot more structure to it.

I do think they would've been acquaintances since, I don't know, the dragon equivalent of high school aged?? Farsight would've been the bubbly, friendly type who likes to talk with everybody, while Mastermind appreciated companionship but had other priorities at the time. They would drift apart for a while in their young adulthood, persuing different things after their lives were shuffled around by the volcano having a flare-up.

Then again, this has taken several months for me to write, and I've warmed up to the idea of them not knowing eachother aside from maybe one or two meetings

A few years later, though, by the time Fierceteeth exists (so around 2003 A.S. with a few months' allowance either way), due to more nebulously defined happenstance, Farsight and Mastermind end up running into each other again and getting to know eachother much more closely.

More specifically, I have this notion that maybe Farsight's job was to be a scribe or a typist/stenographer (depending on how much technology dragons would have-- Tui seems to add technology to her world based on what *feels* old-timey, making it ambiguous if it's medieval or post-renaissance or another thing entirely. I find it funny to call it The Calculus Problem, based on how they seemingly have invented calculus but not gunpowder-- in a warring, fire-breathing species no less!) , and they would have met again when Mastermind began to work under Battlewinner directly and would be made to start attending the meetings. (you know what I mean by the meetings, right? idk i haven't read the dark secret in... a while...)

Anyways, the start of their relationship happens very quickly and out of nowhere and all at once. Depending on where in the year the brightest night is (it's never directly exposited iirc) it might be over the course of a bit over a year or less than it. Why it happened so quickly, I have a few ideas as to that also.

Mainly, they were both lonely and their home was slowly being destroyed. Farsight had whoever Fierceteeth's father was die on her, her friend(?) Secretkeeper is often busy with her life in high places, and it's unknown how much else she has going for her. Mastermind, meanwhile, is pretty much an outsider within their society (source: he hides in a room all day and people don't seem to like him) Companionship, at this point, seems very desirable, and so they quickly end up romantically entangled.

Aaaand then Starflight happens, and the weirdness/canon mystery regarding this relationship becomes impossible to ignore.

My thoughts on the situation go like this:

Farsight knows Mastermind is Starflight's father, and so does Mastermind. They both know that the other knows, and are perfectly open about it... to each other.

For a time, they just don't tell anyone else about their relationship, let alone the egg's parentage because of... social reasons I guess? Lots of which relate to the prophecy and stuff.

There are a few reasons I've come up with, but personally, I've landed on the following for now:

Harsh but plausible; (almost) no one likes Mastermind, and he's still there just because they need a science guy and he's the one ensuring they still have a water supply. However, based on what we have seen of him, he is unemphatic, far from personable, and difficult to work with. He's unpopular, essentially, and somehow high up in the pecking order despite that, and Farsight knows she'll have enough dragons in her face to begin with just having an egg that lines up with the prophecy in the first place. She wants to keep their relationship- especially after the egg- under wraps, and Mastermind agrees for her sake. After she dies (or just after things cool down- more about this later) Mastermind is more willing to mention it occasionally, but anybody who pays attention doesn't really believe him.

Or maybe they were normal about it and Morrowseer is out of touch and dragons just don't believe anything Mastermind says sometimes because. The mastermindl

Regardless, they grow closer at a fairly steady rate, and they get along well! Things are stable and sane, except for the looming anxiety of Starflight's egg being taken because they should know that, really-

There are two (wow, only two for once?) possibilities with Starflight here; either his being a prophecy egg was deliberate, or coincidental. Based on Farsight's feelings about him, at least, I tend to fall in the latter camp.

Logically, if an egg's hatching can be accurately predicted to the day, apparently, they probably knew from very early on that Starflight would hatch around the brightest night at the very least. Mastermind knows this, and logically, Farsight should too- but based on her behaviour in Winglets, it seems like she hasn't fully processed or come to terms with it, even though she definitely *knows*. At the very least she wants to pretend like she'll get to spend all that time with it and raise it as long as she can.

And then the egg is taken.

And Farsight doesn't take it well.

In Winglets, Fierceteeth menitons her "moping" and it being "so annoying". Based on how scared Fierceteeth seems to be of emotions, I generally take this as meaning it was bad. Fierceteeth essentially lost her mother all the way back then-- Farsight was grief-stricken, depressed, and inconsolable. They were both unable to handle the situation and it ruined their relationship for good.

However, as much as I would love to go on and on about Fierceteeth and Farsight and the tragedy of it all and how it's nobody's fault and it's everybody's fault and it's Morrowseer's fault in a way but he's a jackass and it doesn't count because everything is his fault BUT that's another infodump for another day, I want to post this within this century, and the main point of this is Farsight and Mastermind.

So, Mastermind.

OH GOD MASTERMIND I NEVER KNOW WHERE TO START--

I do think Mastermind would care about Starflight, and earnestly, too! (He strikes me as a very earnest character, just a weird, morally dubious one.) He's just not very emotionally literate and has a hard time caring.

Where Farsight so instantly and completely loves, Mastermind is a lot more reserved. He's slower to care about things, slower to get attached, more easily put off-- he's not friendly.

So he doesn't care horiffically much about the egg at first, not any more than an extension of Farsight and his relationship with her. Sure, he hopes it goes well, if only so Farsight-whom he already has grown to love-is happy and well.

However, seeing it taken, seeing it somewhere where he is unable to see it, and seeing Farsight so utterly distraught, it gets him to start caring. He wants her to not be so consumed by grief. He begins to miss that egg too, and in this shared understanding, he wants nothing more than to comfort her.

One problem: he's bad at that!

Again, he's not emotionally literate, he's not the most empathetic, and he only has some vague idea of how to comfort someone. It only works some pittance of the time because Farsight, always caring, bleeding heart, actually got to know him Farsight, can tell he's trying to comfort her and appreciates it.

Their only relief from the situation is the fact that the other understands. It's a weird place to be, and it's hard to get empathy for: their dragonet has been taken from them before it hatched, presumably to a place where it will be happy and alive, but it was still TAKEN, and there wasn't much say for them to have in it. Considering the conditions on the island, they might die before their child can come back home, and even then they'll have missed its entire childhood. Any sense of grief or loss could very easily be tainted by guilt, because their dragonet was alive-- so many others weren't.

Regardless, they are stuck together, even with feelings and lives and pursuits that are all falling apart and collapsing and becoming so dysfunctional, because the other is the only one that really understands. It's probably not the greatest thing, but there's not really anywhere else to go. The only way out of it, really, is for someone to die.

And then Farsight goes ahead and does die! Effectively, it's the end of the relationship, and it has some very interesting implications on Mastermind's behaviour's afterwards.

I've seen the idea shared before (i think i was spectating the fandom wiki forums, of all places) that Farsight was Mastermind's moral compass or something like that, able to stop him before he went to before. I don't quite hold that so literally, but it's totally understandable that, with that one stable pillar in his life gone, Mastermind would be a good deal less well adjusted.

I'd imagine Farsight's death would give him a bit of a mortality crisis of sorts, realizing that she died on the dying island, too weak from stress and starvation to hold up a fight, before ever getting to meet the child she cared so much about. And suddenly, despite the growing despair and workload and apathy, Mastermind cares very much about his work, maybe too much, because he doesn't want to die there like she did.

I've always imagined Morrowseer as Mastermind's supervisor--well, he's in charge of a lot of people, but not quite so directly--and using that kind of rhetoric, of not wanting him or his tribe to die on the island, to try and push Mastermind into duties he was reluctant to do. After that, it really begins to work.

And, when they need an experiment that may very well secure their future, but is messy and unsafe and underfunded and needs more than one researcher and just in a way he hasn't been raised and taught to be able to place gross, he's willing to agree. He just wants to live long enough to see a way out of there, and if he can help make one, that increases the odds for him, and reduces the number of dragons that have to die like her.

And, hey, he gets his wish.

In my opinion, Farsight's shadow looms heavy over the RainWing experiments. She weighs so heavily, suffocatingly heavy, over nearly every damn interaction Starflight has with his surviving family.

The scene where he first meets Starflight hurts. He's just so happy, and proud, and just has this sudden turn in mood... to me, from my brainrotted headcannon haze, it feels like the first reason he's had to light up so much and so genuinely in AGES. (I've seen the opinon where he's just happy to have someone to sit around and make him feel better about himself, but I've never really read him as sinister in that way, just emotionally stilted in one way or another.) It's the closest he's gotten to seeing Farsight in ages. The only moment of apathy we get from him around Starflight is when he gets to the desperate, dead-end, most uncomfortable part of his WORK--

The exact thing that turns Starflight away from him. He doesn't even really notice.

Because integrity and good moral standing died like everything else in this place. Where all the dragonets were slowly killed in one sense with the "nightwing superiority" rhetoric they were taught for generations, and far more literally as the environment crumbled around them. Where Mastermind and Farsight's relationship died slowly, too. It was a place where everything not already rotten was going, going, gone.

Or something like that. The best part about their relationship is the room for interpretation, I guess.

So yeah! Mastermind x Farsight! And to think this all happened so quickly, too... They never really had a chance, but they really did end up loving eachother.

I am SO SO SO SORRY this took so long, I've just been stuck in an exhausted dysfunctional funk for months. I can't tell when this ask was even sent anymore--October I think?-- and i am very sorry. I'm getting back into the groove, though, and more than happy to exhange ideas about Farsight and related subject matter in the future.Obsessing over fictional characters that appear twice is something I'm always willing to indulge in. I promise it won't take as long lolll

Anyways, my fellow Farsight enjoyer, it has been very fulfilling to get this all out in text, and I'm very curious to see what you think! I am not proofreading this so if something makes absolutely no sense, sorry about that too.

So yeah! Thanks for the ask, I appreciate it loads :]

[kimetsu-chan]

I went on a walk with my dad

[n0phis]

Gay.

gonna use this ask i didn’t initially dignify with a response to say that not replying to the ask game anons is killing me oh my god. overarching post to everyone who sent one holy shit those are some of the coolest things ive ever heard. really really really incredibly immeasurably happy that i can help inspire some of u, AND that ive met so many cool ppl in the community :] u guys slap

[toytulini]

Disclaimer im just processing some thoughts im not cancelling the show

have almost thoughts about how i find the like....narrative on here that if you have chronic "zebra" conditions youd want a doctor like House and wouldnt sue for malpractice bc at least youd have a doctor that cares about whats wrong with you but lets take it one step further. so often he does NOT give a shit about the patient and actively endangers them frequently with his god damn heoric era of medicine approach? non zero amount of times he gets a diagnosis but it comes too late, or he gets a diagnosis after their first wrong 3 guesses of the episode shut down the patients kidneys and they either have to get a transplant or they are just, doomed due to other preexisting conditions etc? idk. i know ppl are almost certainly exaggerating and just letting off steam about the very real failures of our current medical systems and the ableism baked in and All That Shit. i just think its weird how ppl romanticize House who STILL, FREQUENTLY, MULTIPLE EPISODES will actively dismiss shit in the exact way that is a problem in our current system, especially when hes being Forced Against His Will To See Clinic Parients, he loves to be dismissive as fuck of symptoms and if he was a real doctor i think he'd be fucking 50/50 on cases he Notices Something To Dig Into vs cases he dismisses as an Anxious Hysterical Woman Who Wants Attention, the only reason he's Right so frequently in his snap judgements is cos it reinforces the narrative. its like a crime drama that has the mastermind serial killer masterfully using "loopholes" and lawyering up all sneaky and dodging Justice and if only our poor little cop protags were allowed to do A TEENY BIT of Justified Police Brutality, they could Save Lives!

and like sometimes in the show they will have a patient die despite his efforts to narratively punish him. not to mention, i think its been at least mildly brought up and glossed over how much they absolutely do not think about insurance costs for these ppl for the insane amount of tests that find nothing and Wrong Medications To Force A Diagnosis they use? i think it was brought up once in the episode following a day in the life of cuddy where she had to fight a lawsuit bc a guys insurance like didnt cover his thumb being reattached but chase reattached it anyway while in surgery cos it was The Right Thing To Do and the guy didnt have the money to cover it and the insurance wouldnt pay unless he sued the hospital or whatever. thats like the only time its come up. whereas like frequently the doctor I go to for osteopathic manipulation tries to check in with me and make sure im covered by insurance etc and that im not going to go broke or get buried in medical debt seeing her.

idk. just some Thoughts. not a defense of our current system and all the flaws it enables and enforces etc. his approach to medicine is really reminiscent to me of what I know of the Heroic Era Of Medicine which i dont...love? and hes framed on here as being an asshole but would kill for his patients to get them a diagnosis etc. but hes definitely extremely paternalistic to patients ? and despite some good clippable lines about ableism and being against eugenics, it honestly feels like his stance on that is kind of a toss up.

[vilelittlecritter]

I hate when I'm trying to enjoy something and then I turn around and there's a hoard of gatekeeping assholes going

"THAT PERSON ACTUALLY SAID SOMETHING SUPER CONTROVERSIAL 8 YEARS AGO AND IF YOU LIKE THEIR CONTENT YOU SHOULD GO STRAIGHT TO HELL BECAUSE NO ONE LIKES YOU AND YOUR INTERESTS ARE SHIT"

Like nice as if I wasn't already self conscious about letting myself just enjoy a piece of media which has helped me cope through my increasingly declining mental health because I'm scared of coming across as "cringe" or "weird" because I've forced myself into this mindset that I need to constantly be super mature which has led me to just straight up not be able to just enjoy doing things.

I'm tired, feel nauseous and angry and I just want to enjoy something and not feel like I shouldn't enjoy it at all.

[beauzos]

Trying not to get mad every time I come into work bcs every fucking day I get put on register for a vast majority of, if not all of, each shift. Im so sick of it. I miss shelving and being on the floor this is lame as fuck

[cr0wc0rpse]

I’m just having a shit time and feeling pretty miserable lately and I’ve been trying to not think too much about it or let it soak but it still gets in through the cracks. And earlier today I was reminded that 1 year ago today I got out of the hospital after my suicide attempt. Which just kind of makes me feel worse. I was miserable then and I’m still miserable now. Almost nothing has actually changed since then, both within me, personally and my life, and outside of me. It’s still the same

[andivmg]

My experience with Luke (Punz)

CW: toxic relationship, racism, dubious consent

I know in the past i said that i would no longer speak about him publicly, and when talking about my experiences with abuse and emotional mistreatment i begged to keep it anonymous but after reflecting on this for a week and seeing so many incredibly smart and strong women tell their stories. they have given me the strength to say his name.

this is really scary to talk about because of the copious levels of harassment i have received from his fans in the past so if this spreads or gets out of hand i will simply log off.

If you read my last post, i nicknamed him 1.

So aside from everything i said there, there were a lot of things i didn’t include because they would’ve made it obvious that it was him and it could potentially backfire on me so, i’m very afraid to post this. but i’m going to do it scared anyway, because it’s not fair that he gets to just go and live his life worry-free as if he didn’t practically ruin mine.

Because I already made a very lengthy post about him, i won’t include everything i said last time to avoid being redundant but if i repeat myself, please bear with me.

In our year long relationship i had to endure emotional neglect, gaslighting, verbal abuse, one instance where there was dubious consent, and much more.

Starting off at the beginning of our relationship, that’s when i was getting copious amounts of hate and harassment from his fan base (warranted or not), he decided that our relationship must be kept private. he said it was to “protect” me from his fanbase when in reality it was to protect himself. it was so he wouldn’t get all the backlash i was getting. this is funny because one of the things i got called out for was saying the B slur (derogatory term used against mexicans/latinos). I won’t get into the nuances of if i could say it or not as a puertorican because that’s discourse that does not pertain to this specific situation. But you know who definitely can’t say it? A white boy from Massachusetts. When i was getting cancelled for this and getting thousands of tweets calling me names, he decided that was the perfect time to say “I mean you are a b***** aren’t you? my little b*****.” Now, he said this completely unprompted. I was in the process of writing my apology and he just said that. I tell you this because i immediately shut him down and told him that there was no universe in which it was okay for him to say that word and especially not one where he could just call me that. While i was reprimanding him, he was smiling and laughing. he apparently found it amusing to call me a slur. regardless, he gave me a half-assed apology and said he wouldn’t do it again. and he didn’t. but this wasn’t the only time he was weirdly racist to me. this was my first time being in an interracial relationship so i was led to believe that this was normal by all the white people around me at the time. But, sometimes my spanish accent would come out and he would make fun of me and the way i pronounced some words. He also refused to visit me in Puerto Rico when i lived there or come meet my family when i really wanted him to because he “didn’t like the heat” or “it’s dangerous there isn’t it?”. Once, while we were watching season 2 of Bridgerton, he implied that the Sharma sisters were “too dark” for him to be attracted to them. This hurt me because they are brown skinned girls. I am a brown skinned girl. Then this, combined with the fact that he told me once he wasn’t attracted to me made me feel like my skin color was unattractive. These are only a few examples i can think of at the moment, but i’m sure there were more. Our relationship ended in 2022 so some of my memory is a bit hazy. But, I do remember feeling inferior to him throughout the relationship because he was white and I was not. I chalk that up to all the micro aggressions i had to deal with because i had never felt that way around white people before.

Another thing i had to endure was him constantly making me feel like he was embarrassed to be with me. Because i was cancelled, he didn’t want to associate with me too much. He did defend me on multiple occasions, I’ll give him that. But, he only did it because his name was getting dragged in the mud along with mine. Excusing my actions made him look better for being around me. In reality he didn’t really care. Because he was such a big content creator and someone i looked up to professionally, I took his advice as law. He told me to tone down my personality, to keep a low profile, to change things about myself to be more palatable to his audience. The same audience that spoke about me like “The pussy can’t be that good punz please stop defending her”. So i changed a lot of things about myself and my content to better suit what his audience liked. He made me feel like if his audience liked me, he would be public about our relationship and stop hiding it. He told me the reason why he wanted to keep our relationship a secret was because he didn’t want to get hate for it. But this wasn’t true. On my 20th birthday he went to Las Vegas for a twitch rivals event. That night i asked to facetime him to say goodnight and he refused because he was at a hotel room with his friends and he didn’t want them to know that we were together. It was as if my mere presence or the utterance of my name was a source of embarrassment for him. And he didn’t let me forget it. It wasn’t just a public thing at that point. He didn’t want people to know we were together, period. This was devastating to me because I would talk to all my friends about him. I was so proud to be with him and I was just one more problem to him. He made me feel so small and insignificant just because his fans didn’t like me.

He would berate me a lot. Not just due to getting heat online, although he did do that a lot. But in general whenever we would get into an argument or a disagreement he would always call me names like annoying or weird or stupid. He would raise his voice at me if i did something he didn’t like and call me an idiot. And that really hurt, i felt like i couldn’t bring up anything or do anything without getting insulted. If I hadn’t seen him in a few days because he was too busy streaming and i asked to hang out he would call me needy, clingy, and annoying. Granted, he might not have been wrong, but that is not something you say to someone you claim to love. He also insulted me when i was in depressive episodes. I have BPD and at the time i was not being treated properly for it. So, I was all over the place emotionally and he was what i clung to for validation, reassurance, and love. I talked to him when we first started dating about my disorder and told him that if it seemed like something he couldn’t handle that he could opt out of the relationship. I guess he didn’t think it was that bad or something idk because whenever i had really bad depressive episodes, he would tell me I was too sad to hang out with. He said that my sadness was a burden to him. Which would be fair. But, once my mother had a conversation with him about me. She told him that i am someone who needs a lot of love and caring. She said that if he wasn’t willing to put in that kind of effort into a relationship to just leave me alone. He reassured her that he would be there for me no matter what. He told my mother that he would protect me and my heart. He did not. He took all the warnings I gave him and ignored them and then made me feel like I was the problem. And even worse, he would say that i was pretending to be sad to get his attention when he would neglect for days at a time.

There were also some smaller things like the fact that he made me feel really guilty whenever he would spend money on me. Also, he would be really mean about my eating habits. For context, i used to suffer from an eating disorder. I was anorexic and had a really unhealthy relationship with food during high school and my first year of uni. This relationship began when i was recovering from my ED. For me, eating was really hard. So i had certain comfort foods that, while sometimes unhealthy, at least it was something to eat when i didn’t feel like eating anything. He knew this. Yet, whenever i would crave some of these foods he would call me fat. Constantly told me I’d gain weight from eating all that junk food. Saying that to someone with an eating disorder is crazy. Other smaller things were that whenever I would post tiktoks where i was lip syncing or just looking good he would yell at me and say i was looking for attention. Same with Instagram or Twitter whenever i would post photos where I looked hot. He never planned out a single date for us. I would beg him to get me flowers and he did maybe once but i’ll get into that in a bit. He would make fun of me in front of his friends to make himself look better. He let his friends say really degrading things about me in his presence. For example, once when i was showering, i overheard him on a discord call with George and Sapnap and i heard George say “if you don’t go in the shower and have sex with Andi, i will”. Once, when i was really struggling with my legs (for those of you who don’t know, i have arthritis and it’s very painful. at the time i wasn’t diagnosed but i was in a lot of pain) I literally could not walk. I had to beg him to take me to the ER because i didn’t know what was wrong with me. He didn’t want to take me but eventually i convinced him, and while we were there all he did was complain about how long it was taking and that he would have rather been at home streaming. Whenever I would talk about my interests that i was excited about like shows or books he would be incredibly uninterested and say that those things were stupid and he didn’t want to hear about them. I know all of these seem very silly or superficial but cumulatively it was awful.

Now for arguably the most serious thing i’m going to talk about. I want to preface this by saying i am just telling my side of what happened. You can come to your own conclusions about this.

On April 25, 2022 it was our one year anniversary, and i had made a dinner reservation for us. I expected him to plan something throughout the day for us to do. He told me he was going to spend the whole day playing Valorant so I got upset and cancelled the reservation. After a very heated argument, we calmed down and i asked him to come over. He came over about an hour later with flowers and drinks (I was 20 at the time so I couldn’t buy the drinks myself). He brought Smirnoffs and Trulys. For context, I am a lightweight. I always have been. I literally get tipsy on half a cocktail. And that day, I hadn’t eaten anything because i was in distress over our argument. So we get to talking and drinking. I blacked out after my second Smirnoff. Apparently I drank 3 but I genuinely cannot remember anything after finishing the second one. The next morning i woke up naked in my bed. I woke him up and asked him “Luke, why am I naked?” and he said “Because you didn’t want to put your clothes back on.” When I clarified to him that that was not what I meant, he got defensive and said that he didn’t realize how drunk I was. He proceeded to tell me that I initiated sex with him and that i was very enthusiastic about it. He said he didn’t know i could black out on three smirnoffs. He made fun of me for being a lightweight and continued to make light of the situation. Then he mentioned that i fell off the bed at some point in the night and that it was funny how drunk I was. I then questioned him. Because if he thought that me tripping and falling off the bed because i was so drunk was funny, how did he not know that i was too drunk? He responded by saying that i fell off the bed only after we were done. That day I broke up with him. I’m still really confused about what happened that night. I don’t remember anything and all I have to go on is what he said to me. We were in a relationship at the time and he says he didn’t know how drunk I was so I’m not sure what to call what happened. A while after that day, his friend that hmu while we were broken up and I started talking again and i confided in him about that night. He told me to be careful saying things like that because they could get me into trouble. I spoke to some of our other friends about it and they told me it was no big deal and that it wasn’t his fault that he didn’t know how drunk I really was. Because I don’t remember, I have been led to believe that this is not a serious matter. You can think what you want, come to whatever conclusions you want. That is just my side of the story.

I want to add that I’m not proud of how I acted after the relationship ended. I felt really angry at all the shit he put me through and I guess a part of me wanted him to hurt even a quarter of how I did. So I started talking to his friend and got involved with him. This backfired on me because his friend ended up really hurting me too so ig i got my karma. But the thing that hurt the most is that because of what I did, some of our friends took his side in the break up. I was told that I did something terrible by getting involved with his friend that he was already insecure about and that he didn’t deserve that. These are the same friends who were witness to the dumpster fire of a relationship we had and all the things he did to me. They turned their backs on me because of this one thing I did. But stood by and watched as he treated me like garbage for over a year.

I will conclude this by saying that while this relationship has been “over and done with” for almost two years now, I carry a lot of trauma from it still. I still talk about him in therapy and have had to put in a lot of work to heal from what he did and i still cannot say that i am okay. I am very blessed to now have a patient and understanding partner who has helped me heal from that trauma and i just want to quickly thank him for that. Nobody deserves to go through what I did. While yes, it was a toxic relationship, and I had a part in that, it does not excuse all the awful things he said and did to me. This is my truth, thank you for taking the time to read it.

[amiableness]

Kiss and Makeup

Pairing: James Potter x Fem!Reader

Summary: James ruins reader’s date and attempts to make it better.

Word Count: 2829

Warnings: Jealous!James; kissing; and reader wearing heels, jewelry and makeup.

A/N 💌: A quick James oneshot that’s been on my mind, but I’m heavily consider making a second part to this.

As usual, thank you to @moonpascal for reading!

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

“Go on, kiss and make up!” Sirius' voice trails after you as you hurry down the corridor, James close on your heels. On any other day, you might have tossed a playful jab back at Sirius, well-accustomed to his relentless teasing about you and James. But today, the weight of everything made your throat tighten, leaving you silent, your focus fixed on reaching the safety of your dorm.

The sharp click of your heels echoed off the stone walls, and James' muttering about your surprising speed in heels barely registers. Your anger simmers, blocking out his words as you storm ahead and shove the door open. James is right behind you, catching it just before it could slam shut in his face, determined not to let you shut him out.

“Get out, Jamie.” Though your voice was laced with anger, the way you used his nickname gave him a glimmer of hope. It wasn’t hopeless—there was still a chance to make everything better.

“I’m not leaving until we figure this out.” James says, stepping forward and leaning against the post of Lily's bed as he watches you roll your eyes and turn into the room. He doesn’t say anything as you begin furiously grabbing clothes and scattered heels off the floor—remnants of you getting ready for a date, now tainted by the tension hanging between you two.

“There’s nothing to figure out! You ruined my date, plain and simple.” You spin around, clutching a black heel in your hand, and for a fleeting moment, James braces himself, half-expecting you to launch it at him in a fit of frustration. But it’s you, his sweet best friend—the one who cares so deeply for others that you always put them before yourself. It’s a trait that drives James a little crazy sometimes, knowing you’d sacrifice your own happiness without a second thought.

The realization only sharpens the sting of your anger, an unfamiliar weight he’s not used to carrying. He can recall times you’ve been disappointed—maybe after one of his careless pranks or his thoughtless disregard for someone’s feelings—but never this. Never this level of anger.

“I said I was sorry.” He tries, crossing his arms over his chest as he watches you scoff and turn away, angrily kicking off your heels. You bend down to pick them up, and despite himself, his eyes drift to the curve of your body. He knows he shouldn’t be looking, but he can’t help it—he’s never been able to take his eyes off you. And now, a bitter feeling twists in his gut, knowing you're dressed all pretty for someone else.

“You're not, though. Why the fuck did you feel the need to scare him off?” You toss the heels into your trunk and turn to face him, arms crossed. He opens his mouth to respond, but the words die before they form—because he doesn’t know how to tell you the truth. He knows exactly why, but admitting it out loud would change everything between you. And he’s not sure he’s ready for that.

The silence between you stretches, heavy and unspoken, as you wait for an answer he isn’t ready to give. You both know exactly what you're waiting for—a proper explanation.

One you’ve been holding out hope for, quietly, for years.

“It's not fair, you know.” You let out a deep sigh, turning to face your desk, your gaze falling on the mirror. James watches as you begin to remove your jewelry, your back turned to him, but his reflection still catches glimpses of you. The anger in your voice has softened, but he knows that if he says the wrong thing, it could all flare up again, as sharp and sudden as before.

“What isn't?” He hesitates, watching you carefully as he takes a cautious step forward. His eyes follow the way your lips part in the mirror, the soft exhale of frustration escaping you as you fumble with your necklace.

He wants to step forward, to gently brush your hair aside and unfasten the clasp, to press a soft kiss against the back of your neck once the necklace slips away. But he can’t—so he remains still, trapped in silence, as he watches you instead.

“Why is it that you go out with girl after girl, but when I show interest in a guy, you scare him off?” You already knew the answer—weren’t blind to it. It had been clear to everyone that you and James had been circling each other for years, dancing around unspoken words.

But he refused to admit that he cared for you as more than friends. It felt pointless to tell him how you felt when it was clear James was intent on keeping you in the friend zone.

From the moment crushes became a part of your life, James had been yours. But you were never certain about his feelings—until that one night when he got blackout drunk and confessed he was in love with you. He has no memory of that drunken night, but you overheard him later, telling the boys he’d never drink that much again because he wanted to actually remember the parties he went to. You’d felt a pang of disappointment, but you were gathering the courage to confront him about it. Then, the next day, he hooked up with a girl from Ravenclaw, and just like that, all your resolve crumbled, leaving you feeling more invisible than ever.

He didn’t remember what he’d said, and if he was out with other girls, it was clear he didn’t care enough to mention it while sober.

That was a year ago, and you still hadn’t brought it up. 

So, to cope with the mess of it all, you went on a date—a rare one, the first in nearly a year. And now, here was James, wrecking it all over again.

“I—” He stops himself, clearing his throat, the tension in his voice betraying the lie before he even finishes. “I don’t think that’s true. You go out on dates.”

He knew he spent a lot of time flirting with girls—whether it was during class, when he should have been paying attention, or at parties where conversation flowed too easily. But when someone showed interest in you? That was a different story altogether. He’d like to blame it on the fact that you were his best friend, but deep down, he knew better. He was protective of you because he couldn’t stand the thought of anyone looking at you the way he did. Was it selfish? Definitely. But the thought of losing you terrified him more than anything.

“You know that’s a lie. You saw how excited I was! Why did you take that from me?” You were fully aware of how weak and accusatory your voice sounded, but you didn’t care. You were hurt, and it was clear in the way you shook your head, disappointment heavy in every movement. James watched your reflection, noticing the way you swallowed hard as if trying to shove down the swell of emotions threatening to break free. And with that, a wave of guilt slammed into his stomach, settling there like a stone.

“I just didn't want him to hurt you!” 

"So you decided to take that off his hands and hurt me instead?" You scoffed, making James flinched as if you had slapped him. It probably would have hurt less if you had.

“Merlin, no! Sweetheart, that wasn't what I was trying to do—”

“Then what were you trying to do, James? Because I'm getting tired of this little game, we have going on.” 

He lets out a shaky breath, his eyes following your hand as you gently remove one of your earrings. For a moment, your gazes meet through the mirror, and the weight of it all presses down on him. He wishes, desperately, that you would just turn around and face him.

He was racking his brain, searching for the right words, trying to find a way to fix this. He considered stepping back, giving you space like he did when you got agitated with him. But this felt different. It wasn’t just about a moment of frustration—it was something deeper, something that could damage your friendship permanently if he didn’t speak up. He knew he had to fix this.

“You guys make up yet?” Sirius hollered, and James could practically picture him standing at the  bottom of the stairs with his hands cupped around his mouth as he shouted at the both of you.

Sirius' words from earlier echoed in his head as if they were taunting him, swirling around like a cruel mantra. 

Go on, kiss and make up.

It felt like an accusation, a reminder of how much he’d messed up. He could feel the weight of it pressing down on him, twisting in his gut. Every nerve in his body screamed that his next move would either make everything worse—digging the hole even deeper—or finally give him a chance to tell you why he’d ruined your date. But the fear of losing you pushed him forward.

“Tell me to stop, sweetheart.”

“Stop what—?” You ask, tossing your last piece of jewelry into the ceramic dish with a sharp clang before turning to face James. Your breath catching in your throat as he moves closer, and without thinking, you instinctively take a step back, bumping into your desk. The sudden movement rattles the items on top, sending a soft, anxious clatter through the room.

A sharp gasp escapes your lips as James reaches out, his hand gently cupping your cheek, his thumb grazing the edge of your jaw. You stare up at him, wide-eyed, and James can’t help but think how pretty you look—more than he’s ever allowed himself to admit. 

He’s never been able to admire you like this before, not without the constant fear of you catching him.

His hands are shaky, and his proximity to you is making him nervous in a way that he couldn’t quite shake. But he didn’t know how else to explain himself. So, tentatively, he let his fingers graze your skin, admiring how you melted into him. He watches, heart pounding, as your lashes flutter and your lips part in surprise at the softness of his touch. The anger in your eyes had faded, leaving behind disbelief and something that looked dangerously close to hope.

He startles both himself and you when the words slip out, low and raw: “You make me so fucking nervous.” You blink up at him, silent, processing the confession. His gaze drifts over the mascara you’d carefully applied, the gloss glistening on your lips—details he hadn’t noticed before, but now felt like a punch to his gut. The jealousy flares, burning hot and fast in the pit of his stomach. It was devastating to realize you were all dressed up, and it wasn’t for him. Those heels, those glossed lips—they were for a guy who hardly knew you. 

Not like James knew you.

You part your lips, and James unknowingly silences you with a gentle brush of his thumb just beneath your lower lip. A soft, satisfied smile tugs at his mouth as he hears the gasp escape you. His hand rests on your left hip, pulling you closer, grounding you against him. The tension in the room thickens, and just like that, your anger has melted.

“If you want me to stop, just say the word, sweetheart.” He murmurs, his voice low and thick with intention as he edged closer. His fingers caressing your jaw, tilting your face upwards, bringing you within a breath of him. The air between you crackles, heavy and charged, and you feel the pull—the tempting, intoxicating proximity. He was so close now, you could feel the warmth of his breath, and all it would take was the slightest movement for his lips to claim yours.

You thought about saying it—the words were right there, just on the tip of your tongue. But then his lips brushed against yours just barely, and everything else faded away. You couldn’t bring yourself to say no—not when this was something you’d wanted for years. Even with the anger simmering inside you, the frustration over James ruining your date, you couldn’t pull away.

Not now. Not when he was so close.

If anything, a strange sense of relief was starting to wash over you—relief that he had ruined it. Because if he hadn’t, it might have been another guy standing where he was now, and the thought of that made something tighten painfully in your chest.

“Last chance.” He mumbled, pulling back just enough to meet your eyes, searching for any sign that you might stop him. The only sound between you was the uneven rhythm of your breaths, erratic and heavy, pulsing with the desire that surged between you both. When you didn’t say a thing, no rejection, no hesitation—only the warmth of your breath mingling with his—he offered a barely-there smile before leaning in, his lips finally capturing yours with a slow, gentle kiss.

He started slow, cautious, as if afraid he might push you away. But the wrecked hum that escaped your throat—the sound of pure desire—told him everything he needed to know. You wanted this as much as he did.

It was overwhelming how quickly the kiss shifted—what started as sweet and searching, quickly turned frantic and hungry. The slow, deliberate pace gave way to a fiery urgency. The gentle brush of lips became a desperate meeting of mouths as the two of you gave into years of pining.

Your hands, which had been gripping the edge of the desk hard, moved slowly toward him. You let your fingers trail up his stomach, feeling the dips and ridges before reaching his chest. Your other hand found its way into his curls, you tugged softly, the motion pulling a low, pleasure-filled groan from deep within him. That sound, the sound of him unraveling, seemed to shatter something inside James. In an instant, he stepped closer—if that was even possible—until your bodies were pressed together, the heat between you two undeniable, consuming.

He pulled away just an inch, and the desperate whine that escaped your lips was enough to pull him back in, his arms circling your waist before effortlessly lifting you onto the desk. You gasped his name, the sound caught in your throat, as his lips claimed yours again, urgent and hungry. One hand slid around your thigh, pulling you closer, the heat of his body pressing against yours as he stood between your parted legs. His grip on your hip was firm, grounding, while his other hand found its place at the side of your throat, fingers warm and possessive.

You had never been kissed like this before. It was overwhelming—an all-consuming heat that ignited deep in your belly as James kissed you with a hunger, as if he'd been waiting for this moment his entire life.

And it was ruining you, because if this was how it felt to kiss James Potter, you never wanted to be kissed by anyone else ever again.

He rocked his hips against yours, the pressure making you gasp, and that breathless sound was all he needed. He deepened the kiss, his tongue sliding into your mouth, tasting you as if he couldn’t get enough. You were so completely immersed in him—the feel of his lips, the taste of him—that the low, teasing whistle from your doorway barely registered in your mind.

“Bloody hell, I didn’t expect you to actually go and kiss her.” Sirius’ voice rang out, loud and unfiltered. The words struck a panic through you, your body warming with embarrassment as you instinctively tucked your head into James’ chest, hoping to hide from the intrusion. You would recognize Sirius’ voice anywhere, and you knew you would be teased about this for ages.

James, with you still propped on the desk, remained a shield, his body pressed protectively against yours. He glanced over at Sirius and Remus, who stood by the doorway. Sirius, leaning against the doorframe, raised an eyebrow, a smirk playing at the corner of his lips, while Remus stood next to him, his usually calm demeanor showing signs of awkwardness.

“Fuck off and shut the door, mate.” James groans, his arms pulling you tighter as he fights the urge to hurl a book at Sirius and Remus. Instead, he sends them a warning glare and brings a hand up to the back of your head, the heat of the moment still burning between you, and silently dares them to say anything more.

The boys hesitate, but not before Sirius calls out with a teasing smirk, “Didn’t know you had it in you, Potter. You finally got your girl.” And just like that, the door slams shut, leaving the air thick with tension and you cringing in embarrassment.

Maybe telling him you loved him wasn’t that pointless after all.

please consider reblogging or leaving a comment! it keeps me motivated to write and spread my work! 🤍

[tbaluver]

Hi...I love your writing so much, Big Fan >_< ♡

Can I ask about what it's like to shower with LNDS men?

Thank U

Showering With Them- The Love And DeepSpace Men

parings in order: Xavier x Reader, Zayne x Reader, Rafayel x Reader, Sylus x Reader genre/ tags: MDNI, 18+, suggestive content. short NSFW is right below the SFW ! (p.s sorry if this format was confusing ! just wanted to add both in this one) a/n: hihi anonnie! thank you for supporting my work i always appreciate it so much ! ♡⸜(˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝ i hope this was okay and that you enjoy reading this and my other future works ! ٩(ˊᗜˋ*)و ♡ i dunno but i might make a shower smut after writing these LMAO anyways gonna post another headcanon in a few hours after this (∩˃o˂∩)♡ any likes and reblogs are always appreciated! enjoy!

⋆｡‧˚ʚ♡ɞ˚‧｡⋆

Xavier: (SFW)

More of a shower person than a bath person because there were too many times to count on how many times you saw him asleep in the bathtub.

Almost falls asleep when you massage his scalp with soap as he wraps his hands on your waist to keep balanced. It just felt too relaxing and he couldn't help but flutter his eyes closed

Has a fair share of wash products but he ends up using yours because yours smell better and it smells like you.

He loves it when you clean him, it feels such a safe and intimate space between the two of you. You hum softly as you work gently against his scalp that you lathered. He felt so safe, so warm, in the space that you two created that he eases into the relaxation.

Loves the feeling of you every time he grazes his hands over your body. Obviously he’ll make sure to wash you as well. He’ll make sure that the soap doesn’t get in your eyes. Sometimes the two of you stand and hug, enjoying each other presence, while the water pours over the two of you-until the water gets cold.

Xavier: (NSFW)

He can't help it. You'll feel his hard-on when he's pressed up behind you. Ruts into you very slowly against your ass as he wraps around you while his hand is planted on your thigh to control the lazy pace. His moans would invade your ear as shaky breaths escape your lips.

Zayne: (SFW)

Another intimate time for the two of you.

When he’s coming home from work, he’s basically putty in your hands. You didn’t need to ask twice. He would barely have any energy to eat dinner or shower. He’s so touchy when you’re helping him wash him off while he lowly murmurs in your ear ‘thank you’s’

The type of man that would admire your body as he washes you with the body soap and shampoo. He has seen your body many times and has memorized every detail of you. But each time he sees you, it's like discovering you anew again. His eyes trail down as his hands lower, lower, and lower down your body as he washes you with the body soap.

Helps you wash your back and any hard places for you to reach and you do the same for him as well.

When you offer to help him wash his hair, he leans down, and you lather it with extra soap, laughing at how cute he looks. He doesn’t mind this at all, he finds your reaction to be adorable whenever you do this.

When he washes your hair, he is always so gentle. “Close your eyes for me, my love.” He’ll say softly as his hands carefully knead shampoo into your hair before washing it all away. He'll make sure none of it goes into your eyes.

Once you both finish washing, he turns off the shower and steps out to grab your towel. You both dry each other off, making sure every drop of moisture is gone and helps you put on your robe.

Zayne: (NSFW)

One finger would be rolling on your nipple while the other hand works through your folds. His mouth would be sucking and swirling on your breasts.

He'll use the shower bench to sit and to meet your height to suck on your breasts but will also use that opportunity to let you ride him.

Rafayel: (SFW)

Takes a long shower and I’m talking hours. He most definitely hogs the water and leaves you cold behind him. Has way too much showering products than you but he’ll definitely share them with you

Jokes aside, he would not stop caressing every inch and curve of your body when he sees you glistening with the water.

Loves to wrap his arms around you from behind. He’ll trail kisses on your shoulder to your ear while whispering how cute you look  before burying his face in the crook of your neck.

Lets you try all his expensive washes and you two would experiment every shower on which is the best

Would tell you to wash him and he loves it when you wash his hair. The way your fingers scrub the shampoo and your nails massaging his scalp, felt like heaven to him. He’ll rest his head on your shoulder as you wash the suds out and he’ll have a content smile resting on his lips.

When the two of you are finished drying up, he'll make sure to pick the best moisturizer for the two of you before you both get dressed

Rafayel: (NSFW)

Round two. After you both finish having sex in bed or wherever, you’ll find him against you again all naked and wet. His arousal is more heightened in the water. He just needs his pretty girl again after the mess you made on his cock

Loves how the water slides and glistens down between your bodies

Sylus: (SFW)

The type to say, “Why waste water when we can just shower together.” And I fear he does have a point so that’s why you both shower together often.

He likes to stand behind you most of the time because this allows him to place his chin on your head as the water falls onto the both of you.

He is most definitely going to get handsy using the soapy water. He’ll moves his hand further down to rub your butt and give it a light squeeze

He loves to put the lather of soap on your nose or place a bunch on your hair just to see your reaction. He also finds it amusing to see you try to do the same with him but you can’t because of your height difference. It usually ends up in a bubble war between the two of you.

He helps dries you off first before you help him dry him off. He'll lower his head so you can ruffle the towel on his head.

When it was his turn to wash his hair, he would lean down, a smile curling on his lips as he gazed at your face while you carefully shampoo into his hair

“Sy close your eyes”

“Why would I do that when I want to stare at my pretty girl?”

Sylus: (NSFW)

You turn him on easily so showering with him feels like he has a permanent hard on. Once you step in the shower, he’ll let you get warm and wet before he starts  rubbing up on you. He just loves the feeling of your bodies pressed against each other, especially since you both are wet.

Pins you against the glass door of the shower and takes you from behind. His right hand finds your breast, squeezing them and pinching your hardening buds in the warm water while his left hand is on the plush of your ass. Sometimes he'll press you up against the wall and have your legs wrapped around him so you don't slip, just let him do all the work as he ruts into you