#and everyone is copping on to your psycho bullshit right now

[stonesandswords]

.

[suiana]

I need government official to have another child PLEASE I AM BEGGING

(yandere! government official x afab! reader)

"You are still as beautiful as the day I met you."

"What do you want this time?"

You mumble bitterly, staring at him through the bars of the holding cell you were currently in. As expected, he had caught you yet again. Only this time, his way of getting you back was much more intense.

You had been married to this crazy psycho for five years, becoming the object of his crazed obsessions as he kept you hidden away from everyone else.

Though, you had managed to escape on multiple attempts, he had always found you and brought you back to the place you had unwillingly come to call home. Though, he had never made a return entrance as big as this one.

Framing you of a crime, labelling you a wanted criminal, getting the cops to come to the place you were staying after escaping... You had to give it to him, this was a big feat. You hadn't realized he was that desperate to have you back.

So here you were, sitting on the floor of the luxurious holding cell he had you placed in, waiting for him to bail you out and give some bullshit excuse. Along with some promise you had to give him. Last time it was to act like you were obsessed with him for a week. You wonder what request he'll have you make this time?

"Well? What do you want me to promise this time?"

The attractive man hums, placing a finger under his chin as he pretends to think. You merely scoff, looking away as you pray that it won't be something too obscene. You still had some pride after all.

"Promise me you won't run away."

"Okay, done. Promised. Now let me out-"

"And..."

You narrow your eyes at him. This was the first time he had demanded you to promise a second thing. Just what was he thinking?

"And I want you to bear me another child."

You freeze on the spot, looking up to see his sinister smile as you shiver. What? Did you hear him correctly? He couldn't have... said that, right?

"What are you looking at me like that for? You know how much I adore children."

He chuckles, taking off his half rimmed glasses as he wipes the lenses. You grit your teeth, fists clenching as you glare daggers at the man who forced you to marry him. Fuck... Why would he ask you this now?!

You couldn't bring yourself to wilingly agree to this demand of his. No way! You already gave him one kid! Isn't that supposed to be more than enough?

But...

What other choice do you have?

It's either that or the prison. You know he won't be against sending you to a private prison, sending you to solitary confinement until you eventually give into him and come back.

You glare at him, looking up as you swallow your pride. There's no other choice. This is the only option. And you know that he knows this. That's why you can feel the smug aura around him in this very moment.

"Fine."

You hear him hum in contentment, dress shoes clacking against the tiled floor as he comes closer to you.

"Excellent. Now let's get you home. Our son is waiting for you."

Man, the gods really must hate you to subject you to such a fate, huh?

[scaryscarecrows]

Hostile Takeover

Charles ‘ChiChi’ Smith woke up six hours ago to pandemonium.

Poisonings. Seven of them, the big boss and his lieutenants. Nobody knows what the fuck happened apart from, well, ‘poisoned’. Somebody had gone to find them and they’d been stone dead, vomit drying around them. Nasty business.

Nobody will cop to it, either. That’s the weird thing. Somebody’s clearly making a grab for power, so own it, right? But nobody is. Everyone’s spooked, and pissed, but nobody’s owning up. It’s not like Sionis was beloved by any stretch, and neither were the bastards he kept close, so why won’t the new boss step up?

Well, ChiChi figures, it may as well be him. He’s been here long enough.

First order of business is to find the responsible party. He loves the opening, but they’re a liability. So he’d gathered a handful of their better foot soldiers, big idiots that shoot first and ask questions later. Sent ‘em out. Grabbed more people to burn the bodies–can’t be too careful–and wondered if it’s too soon to start redecorating the main office.

A few hours later, he decided it’d been long enough and headed in, only to be met with a little fucker.

Jason Todd has been here about three months. He’s eighteen, a mouthy little bastard. It’s been ChiChi’s dream to shut his ass up one way or the other, but so far no luck. And he’s sitting in the leather chair with his boots thrown up on the desk, toying with some expensive glass doodad.

“What the hell are you doing in here?” he demands. Todd grins up at him.

“Checkin’ out my new office. What are you doing here?”

He laughs.

“This ain’t your office, kid. Get out.”

“Well, you sure as hell didn’t poison the old man.” Todd’s eyes flash. “Seems I’ve got more right to it than you.”

ChiChi stares.

“You did that.”

“Uh-huh.” Todd stretches back, chair creaking. “Spiked their beer, sat back, and laughed.”

“Bullshit,” ChiChi spits. “Get the hell outta here.”

Outside, there’s shouting and Todd rolls to his feet.

“Sounds fun. Let’s go see.”

Before ChiChi can grab him, he’s breezed by and gone out into the heat.

There’s strangers in the compound. ChiChi doesn’t recognize most of them, but the big guy, Trent Ages, has done business with them before. Not often, and he’s fucked ‘em over a few times, but it’s happened. He’s holding a big duffle bag. The others, guys ChiChi doesn’t know, are armed but standing loosely despite the sheer number of guns trained on them.

“You got ‘em!” Todd crows, striding over. “Nice.”

What.

He turns to the assembly, spreads his hands, and intones, “Last night, I gave our former boss and his cronies a case of strychnine-spiked beer. To put it bluntly, I’m in charge now. Before anybody tries to argue–Ages, throw me that, would ya?”

Ages obliges. Todd catches the bag, staggers a bit, and tosses it towards ChiChi. Keeping one wary eye on Todd, he crouches down and opens it up.

Glassy eyes stare up at him and he scrambles back when it clicks that those are heads, that he knows those heads, he sent ‘em out this morning what the fuck–

“Recognize ‘em?” Todd’s smile is cold. “They had to go.”

“You’re a fucking psycho!”

“No, I’m pragmatic. They were too quick to jump for you.” He raises his voice. “Sionis was small-time. I’m not. We’re not gonna keep wasting our time fucking with the Garage. They don’t have anything better than we do.” He pauses. “Luthor’s got a supply convoy heading this way next week. We’re going to take it from him.”

There’s a wave of murmuring. ChiChi stands up. Todd’s going to get them all killed, which he doesn’t give a shit about. He’s been here too long, put up with too much shit, to let this little cocksucker just roll in here and ruin everything.

“That’s crazy,” he says, marching over. Todd studies him, eyebrow raised. “You think, because you found some nuts willing to humor you, that you can just take over? Just like that?”

“Just like that.”

“Bullshit. Somebody fucking shoot–hurgh!”

Todd’s suddenly a lot closer, one hand fisted in ChiChi’s shirt and the other down low, where a burning pain is suddenly spreading through his gut. His knees start to buckle and Todd’s grip tightens, forcing him to stay on his feet.

“You were always a sick fuck,” he breathes. “And a liability. But don’t die on me just yet, I’m not done here.”

He scrambles for something, anything; a gun, a knife, even a grenade, at this point, but Todd kicks his feet out from under him and the burning pain shoots upwards before Todd draws his knife back out and lets him fall.

“I will warn you,” he continues, “anyone who gets in my way will regret it. If you want to end your miserable life choking on your own blood in the middle of the desert, that’s your business. I can’t promise you your death will be as merciful as ChiChi’s here.”

BLAM!

Jason Todd holsters his gun and turns from the corpse without a backwards glance.

“Somebody burn this,” he says carelessly. “That bag, too. Then I want everybody in the Big Building. We’ve got things to discuss.”

He starts back towards the office. One of the new men, a redhead, says something in a low voice and he laughs.

“Oh, yeah, the bodies those heads came from are about a mile east. Might wanna do somethin’ about those, too.”

THE END

[morgansdeb]

My thoughts on 13RW Season 4 (SPOILERS)

So I originally wasn’t going to write a review, because if I’m completely honest, I’m still in shock by that finale... but here we go...

Overall, I enjoyed this season a lot more than season 3. This time, we didn’t have Ani’s annoying narration, that weird crap that was Bryce/Ani and that Bryce “redemption” bullshit that the writers shoved down our throats last season, so kudos for that. Too bad the ending fucked everything up.

Now, let’s go character by character:

Jessica: Jessica has always been my favorite character (besides Hannah), so I was really disappointed by her arc this season... if we can call it that. Her reaction to Justin breaking up with her was really immature. I understand that she was hurt, but Justin was right, he wasn’t in a position to be in a relationship and needed to focus on his recovery, so for Jessica to go after the first guy she could find (Diego) to get back at him... it was shitty. Also, what the hell, Jessica? Diego spent the whole season tormenting Clay and defending Tyler’s rapist. Aren’t Clay and Tyler your friends? Why are you sleeping with someone who is messing with people you claim to care about? And please don’t say it’s for “information”, because you clearly liked him, even tho he was an asshole. Once again, the writers made Jessica’s storylines all about boys, first it was Alex and Justin, now it was Justin and Diego. And to give one final “fuck you” to her character, they implied she ended up with Diego. “Ask me in a month”, um, so it’s going to take you a month to get over Justin? Okay, cool.

Clay: I’ve always loved Clay. Always. He’s flawed, he’s stupid, he’s too stubborn... but he cares. I’ll say this tho, he was a complete ASSHOLE towards Justin during that party, and he should have apologized for all those awful things he said, because that shit was NOT okay. I appreciate that he got help, and Dr. Ellman was a fantastic character, but his arc got old real fast. Clay has some fucked up hallucinations, Clay has a breakdown and makes a scene in front of people, Clay claims everything is fine when clearly it’s not. We get it, he thinks he’s Batman and can handle all this shit alone. Well, clearly, he can’t.

Ani: I’ll admit, I actually liked Ani this season. I think it’s because her screentime was reduced (she missed big moments like the camping trip and the shooting drill), and she wasn’t inserting herself in everyone’s business like last season. I appreciate her standing up for her friends against Winston and apologizing to Jessica for sleeping with Bryce, but that NEVER should have happened. It was weird as hell how she kept defending Bryce in s3, insisting he wasn’t a monster (he was a serial rapist who raped your friend, how is that not a monster). Her “explanation” as to why she slept with Bryce was crap. “I was lonely and stupid”, well, aww!! Lots of people are lonely and stupid, but that isn’t an excuse to defend a serial rapist and sleep with him multiple times. And even before she slept with him, she kept hanging out with him, playing poker and laughing like nothing was wrong. Weird as hell. At the end of the day, I still don’t know who Ani is, other than “the girl who liked Bryce and then liked Clay.” I’m 100% grateful that she and Clay broke up, that was never going to work, so I’ll drink to that. It was also annoying how she and Clay took their sweet time to tell the others about Winston. STOP KEEPING SECRETS. I still insist that the writers should have kept Sheri and Ani shouldn’t have existed.

Zach: Seriously, where the hell was Zach’s mom to check on her son? The whole season was basically “oh, look, Zach’s drunk!!” He was a hot mess and all his friends didn’t do shit to help him until the last minute. I know Winston manipulated him, but seriously, telling the enemy that you beat up Bryce?? Not cool, dude. And don’t get me started on that scene where they “implied” he was going to assault that drunk girl. Zach has flaws, sure, but he ISN’T a rapist, and neither is Clay (I’m talking about that weird scene where he hallucinates Bryce encouraging him to assault that girl at the frat house). The writers clearly didn’t give a fuck about Zach. Remember in s2 when he told his mom he had suicidal thoughts?? What happened to that?? I’m glad he came to his senses in the end, but he obviously needed help with his addiction.

Tyler: I felt bad for Tyler because his friends didn’t trust him, but I also sorta get it. He was acting hella shady and I get that the cops told him not to say anything, but... dude, you scared the living hell out of Clay with those guns at the end of s2, how are your friends not going to be suspicious? Like in 13RW fashion, his storyline got dragged for too long, but I think he was right when he called out Clay and Tony about their friendship. I liked his friendship with Estela, that was sweet. But overall Tyler didn’t get that much to do this season. I didn’t like how they made him feel bad about Monty. Monty raped him and belonged in jail, it isn’t Tyler’s fault someone decided to kill him.

Alex: GAY KING. The only character who didn’t annoy me this season (besides Charlie). Bryce and Monty apologists, how are you feeling?? My boy didn’t go to jail like y’all wanted it!! No “justice” for the rapists!! Beautiful, amazing, brilliant. In all seriousness, I wish his crush on Zach had been explained a bit more. I don’t think it came out of nowhere, but it would have been nice to spend more time with it. I don’t know how I feel about the whole thing with Winston, he was a Monty apologist so I didn’t want to see another one of my faves sleeping with a rape apologist, so I’m glad he found out the truth in time. Charlie and Alex were so cute together, I wanted him with Zach, but I can’t bring myself to complain because ALEX GOT A HAPPY ENDING, YAY!! He regretted killing Bryce, but it’s like Zach said “maybe he didn’t deserve to die, but NEITHER DO WE”, and he was right. Alex didn’t deserve to have his whole life ruined over a fucking rapist, so I’m glad he got happiness. I just wish his recovery arc after his suicide attempt had been done better, he’s the only character in the show who is a suicide survivor and they never focused on that. Shame, tbh.

Tony: I don’t have much to say about Tony. He was being hella stubborn about not going to college and staying in town, so I’m glad his dad knocked some sense into him. He got a happy ending and got to see his sister again, so that was nice. Tony always had to deal with so much crap, so I’m happy he ended up happy.

Winston: Now this dude didn’t annoy me as much as I thought he would, but... he was weird. He became obsessed with Monty after meeting him twice, and then obsessed with Alex after dating him for two weeks. What was his reason?? Why did he fall in love so quickly?? I thought we were going to get some backstory to explain his behavior, but we didn’t get shit, except that scene in the first episode with his mom where he seemed like some lonely rich kid. I’m glad he let go of Monty in the end and didn’t ruin Alex’s life, but other than making a bunch of passive-aggressive comments and staring at people, he didn’t do much. The trailer made him seem like some mastermind villain, and in the end... he wasn’t.

Diego: How are you going to spend the whole season calling Clay a psycho/crazy, when you’re out there pulling pranks, beating people up, and defending a rapist?? Check yourself first, Diego. He was so annoying with his “I miss Monty” crap, like how are you going to give a big speech about how great Monty was when Tyler, the guy he raped, was sitting right in front of you??!!  I wish he had faced some consequences for all the shit he did to Clay, like “omg, you brought a knife!!, dude YOU left the knife in there. I’m glad he let things go in the end, but JFC, he was annoying. When Zach told him to suck his dick, I cheered so hard.

Justin: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA... HA. I’m laughing because I don’t wanna start crying again. Are the writers fucking serious?? After EVERYTHING they did with Justin, turning him into a better person, making him Clay’s brother, getting him back together with Jessica, EVERYTHING...and he dies?? And even before his death, they needed to torture him one last time and kill off his mom, have Clay and Jessica treat him like shit, and make him feel like nobody wanted him. Wow, what a brilliant idea. The series finale would have been perfect if they hadn’t killed off Justin. He deserved to graduate and live a long, happy life. I think the writers just wanted to have one final tragedy and controversial storyline, so they did this cruel and unnecessary crap. I’m disgusted, tbh.

Bryce and Monty: I’m so, so happy we got ZERO Bryce flashbacks and ZERO Monty flashbacks. FUCK these two rapists. I didn’t feel sorry for either of them, and I hope future shows do better and the humanizing of rapists stops. We already know rapists are human, they aren’t aliens who come from another planet, but the focus needs to be on the VICTIMS. I know they weren’t going to bring back Katherine Langford and Brandon Larracuente for a 5-second cameo, but hallucination!Justin should have been hanging out with Hannah and Jeff, not Bryce. Bryce wasn’t Justin’s brother, he treated him like shit and raped his girlfriend, and the whole “it’s okay to love people who do bad shit” is bullshit. There’s nothing wrong with hating rapists/abusers and bad people in general (like racists, homophobes, etc). Well, at least the two rapists are dead and can never hurt anyone again.

Say whatever you want about Hannah Baker, but this show suffered a HUGE loss when Katherine walked out of that door during her final scene.

They should have sent Bryce’s ass to jail at the end of s2, and the last two seasons should have been about ALL the character’s recoveries, with everyone getting proper characterization, good storylines, and focus on the friendships and family dynamics. The murder mystery and cover-up stuff ended up being really stupid and pointless. The writers prioritized shock value over proper storytelling, and that’s a shame because the cast is really talented, and the characters had the potential to be better than what they actually were.

Goodbye, 13 Reasons Why. I’ll check out the cast’s future projects, but the writers/producers can GTFO.

[skinks]

hi!!! what are your favourite movies? like actually good ones but also any trashy comfort movies? is IT (2017) one of them?

Hello!! IT (2017) IS ABSOLUTELY ONE OF THEM oh man, thank you for this, I love talking about movies!!!! This is possibly the most difficult question you could have asked me. Apologies for how absolutely off the rails this got, I just... love movies so much lmao

I’ve said this before, but opening night of IT ch1 was the best cinema experience I’ve ever had, I’m so glad I got to see it with a fully packed audience who were all laughing and screaming together the whole way through. I’m a huge fan of... everything ch1 was doing, the 80s nostalgia, the summer-coming-of-age themes, the solid ghost train funhouse JOY of the Pennywise performance and scares, the washed-out cinematography, the tiny background details to make everything that much more eerie, the kids’ ACTING?!

Like, a lot of the time I find child actors can be really awkward and stilted to watch, but I remember leaving the cinema really impressed by JDG and Sophia Lillis in particular. I liked that they were all allowed to be little shitheads with potty mouths, it felt like a callback to 80s movies like The Lost Boys or Stand By Me. The whole thing worked to make me really care about what happened to the kids (even if I do still have issues with how they handled Mike. I understand even ch1 had limitations with juggling so many characters, but still). I saw it another 2 times in the cinema and have rewatched it at least, I dunno, 7-10 more times since then?

Add to all of that the retroactive CANON R+E baby pining subplot? I just love it, as if that wasn’t obvious by now given my Whole Blog. It’s a really special movie to me!

Anyway!! Ok, the main handful of movies I rewatch all the fucking time are:

Back to the Future, The Lost Boys, Pride and Prejudice (2005), Jaws, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, The Breakfast Club, Ocean’s 11, POTC 1, The Dark Knight, Inception, Die Hard, LOTR trilogy, Snatch, The Nice Guys, Logan Lucky, Mad Max Fury Road, Clueless, 10 Things I Hate About You, Billy Elliot, Dirty Dancing, Tomb Raider (2018)...

Those are the easily consumable ones that I’ve seen so many times I don’t really have to concentrate or think about them, but I really love them and unfortunately often KEEP rewatching them instead of new stuff. It would take too long to go into why I love all these movies so much because I could write the same amount as I already did for ITCH1, and everyone already knows why those movies are good, so, lol.

I think I’m gonna have to subdivide and categorise this whole post because there are too many separate criteria for... goOD MOVIES, AUUHH 😩

Okay so first off, HORROR MOVIES? I’m especially in love with Re-Animator (1985) and its sequel Bride of Re-Animator, they’re such good examples of camp and batshit 80s practical effects, and also EXTREMELY funny. I’m actually just gonna post my list of my fave horror movies that I do actually keep on my phone at all times lmao. These are in no particular order:

Wholeheartedly recommend every one of these. I’ve never been so scared in my life as I was watching Hereditary in the cinema, hoo boy. Mother! by Aronofsky is one of the strangest experiences I’ve ever had (and I actually saw it on the same day I saw IT ch1 for the first time!! That was a fun day)

Psycho (1960) and The Fly from 1986 should also be on there but I couldn’t fit them in the screenshot.

I’m a HUGE fan of a ton of martial arts movies too, like Kung Fu Hustle, Shaolin Soccer, Ip Man, The Raid movies, John Wick 3 is my fave of the trilogy, Drive from 1997 with Mark Dacascos is incredible, SPL 2, Ong-Bak, Operation Condor, Project A, Iron Monkey, and Zatoichi (2003) are some favourites.

My favourite Tarantino is Reservoir Dogs, fave Coen brothers are Raising Arizona, The Ballad of Buster Scruggs and O Brother Where Art Thou. Love some old-timey colour correction and weird offbeat dialogue. I also love Goodfellas!!! And Donnie Brasco! And The Firm, I’m so easy for any good crime/law/gangster/heist procedural like that, especially if they’re from the 80s or 90s in a super dated way.

Fave Disney movie is Tarzan, favourite Ghibli movies are Spirited Away and Lupin III. I remember watching Spirited Away during a thunderstorm one time and it being.... god! Transcendent! Favourite Pixar movie is The Incredibles (the first one. ALSO the documentary “The Pixar Story” is great and well worth a watch, it’s very comforting for some reason) and my favourite Dreamworks movies are HTTYD1 and Spirit: Stallion of the Cimmaron.

I tend to watch more anime movies than tv shows, so stuff like Akira, The Girl Who Leapt Through Time, Summer Wars, Journey to Agartha, and my ultimate fave anime is Sword of the Stranger (2008). The climactic fight in that movie is fucking stunning and should be counted in “bests fights” lists right alongside anything live action

Also if we’re talking animated movies another hearty favourite is Rango, and a Belgian stop-motion (which at one time I considered my favourite movie ever) called Panique Au Village (2009) which is one of the funniest movies ever made imo.

As for TRASHY movies, I’m not sure if that’s the right word for how I feel about these ones but.. dumb/silly/slightly guilty pleasure movies? Ones that I feel need some kind of justification lmfao

Troy - something u must know about me is that I’m a giant slut for the Assassin’s Creed franchise, so if a movie smashes historical and mythological nonsense together with fun costumes and sword fights, I’m gonna enjoy myself. Even if they should have made Achilles and Patroclus gay. Other movies in this vein are King Arthur: Legend of the Sword, and Immortals (2011)

Gods of Egypt - I know all the reasons this movie is whitewashed bullshit. But it was already bullshit with giant Anubis mecha and giant snakes and bad acting and ridiculous CGI and frankly I had a blast at the cinema (my friend who I forced to come with me did not have a blast. Sorry H***)

Avatar - yes, the one with the big blue people. This movie gets a lot of flack nowadays but I really do enjoy it just for the spectacle. The full CGI world technology was so new at the time and I love to wallow in the visuals and daydream about riding a cool dragon around in the jungle

George of the Jungle - I’ll defend this movie to the death ok this movie shaped me as a person, it is fucking hilarious and Brendan Fraser is the himbo to end all himbos. It’s perfect. The song Dela is perfect. I still want to write a reddie AU about it. It’s one of the best movies ever made and I’m not being ironic

Set It Up - I KNOW this is a dumb Netflix original romcom but consider this; it was funny and the leads had great chemistry. I got butterflies. I once watched it and then literally immediately set it back to the start so I could watch it again

The Brady Bunch Movie - when people talk about great satires or parodies you will see them bring up the same movies over and over again, Blazing Saddles, This Is Spinal Tap etc, but they never talk about The Brady Bunch Movie from 1995 for some reason, which they should. It is one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen and every time i watch it somehow it gets funnier

Some more general favourites that I do still love but don’t rewatch as often, and don’t wanna go into more detail about are:

Moon (2009), Crna Mačka Beli Mačor, The Sixth Sense, Parasite, The Handmaiden, Tremors, Wet Hot American Summer, Tucker and Dale vs Evil, What We Do In The Shadows, Hunt For the Wilderpeople, The Secret of My Success (I love kitschy 80s movies, is that obvious by now), The Green Mile, When Harry Met Sally, Rear Window, The Odd Couple, Breaking Away, Pan’s Labyrinth, To Kill A Mockingbird, The Eagle, Gladiator, The Artist, The Extraordinary Adventures of Adèle Blanc-Sec, Call Me By Your Name, Master and Commander, Pacific Rim, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, Legend (1985), Emma. (2020), Flash Gordon, Trolljegeren, Hross í Oss, Beverly Hills Cop, Coming to America, WarGames, District 9, Ajeossi (2010), Tracks (2013), Sightseers, Mud (2012), Pitch Black, Four Lions, Shaun of the Dead, Starship Troopers, The Truman Show, Withnail & I....... Jesus Christ ok I need to stop

NOTABLE EXTREME FAVOURITES that I didn’t include in the regular rewatch list because they’re too heavy/not as well known/require more attention.:

Thin Red Line (1998), Badlands (1973) both dir. Terrence Malick

Malick’s brand of dreamy impressionistic filmmaking is something I find really appealing, both of these movies are gorgeous and unusual and poignant and, in the case of Thin Red Line at least, have a lot of things to say about a lot of rough subjects. I don’t totally understand all those things sometimes, but a theme with a lot of my favourite movies is that I’ll be more likely to love something long-term if it raises unanswered questions, or is surreal/esoteric etc. Plus the cinematography is incredible, and I wish there was a way to get Jim Caviezel’s narration from The Thin Red Line as an audiobook because it’s very poetic and soothing.

Let the Bullets Fly (2010) dir. Jiang Wen

This movie is WILD, it’s so much fun. It’s sprawling and intricate and epic and smart and really fucking funny, it! Has! Everything! A gang of very tolerant outlaws!! Jiang Wen’s beautiful broad chest!!! Chow Yun Fat absolutely DECIMATING the scenery, and the two of them outsmarting each other in order to gain control of a small Chinese town!!! Plus it’s long, but it packs so much nonsense and intrigue that it goes by really fast. Wow what a flick

A Field in England (2013) dir. Ben Wheatley

I know I included this in my horror list but aaaaahhh ahhhh Wheatley is one of my favourite directors (he also made Sightseers, and is directing the Tomb Raider sequel which makes me absolutely rabid.) This is a surreal black-and-white psychological horror black comedy set in the English Civil War about some deserters who may or may not meet the Devil in a field. People eat mushrooms. It’s bonkers. I love being blasted in the face with imagery that I don’t understand

Mandy (2018) dir. Panos Cosmatos

Speaking of being blasted in the face!!!!! This movie... I saw it in the cinema and I can’t even begin to explain the experience, but I’ll try. My favourite review site described it like this:

“...somewhere between a prog album cover come to life and a metal album cover come to life, and subscribes to both genre's artistic tendency towards maximalism: what it ends up being is basically naught else but two glorious hours of being pounded by bold colors...”

So, prog and metal are my two favourite genres of music. This movie opens with the quote “When I die, bury me deep, lay two speakers at my feet, put some headphones on my head and rock and roll me when I'm dead.” and then a King Crimson song, it is SURREAL to the nth degree, it’s violent and bizarre and Nic Cage forges a giant silver axe to destroy demonic bikers and there is a CHAINSAW DUEL. A galaxy swirls above a quarry. Multiple animated horror nightmare sequences. At one point a man says “you exude a cosmic darkness” and releases a live tiger. At another point Cage says, in a digitally deepened voice, “The psychotic drowns where the mystic swims. You’re drowning. I’m swimming.” and I haven’t stopped thinking about it for two years

Paper Moon (1973) dir. Peter Bogdanovich

Really fantastic movie set in the Great Depression (and also in black & white) about a conman and a little kid who may or may not be his daughter, running cons across the Midwest. It’s beautifully shot, so sharp and sweet and the progression of their dynamic is really well done because they’re played by an IRL father and daughter. Tatum O’Neal was NINE YEARS OLD and she’s so amazing in this movie she’s actually the youngest person to win a competitive category Oscar. I keep trying to get people to watch this fbdjfjdbf it’s wonderful

Alpha (2018) dir. Albert Hughes

THIS MOVIE IS A VICTIM OF BAD MARKETING ok, the trailers made it look like some twee crappy sentimental Boy And His Dog Adventure, plus it had voiceovers in American-accented english? That’s a total disservice to one of the coolest things about this film; the fact that they got a linguist to construct an entirely original Neolithic language that all the characters speak for the entire runtime. And yes, it is eventually a Boy And His Wolf adventure, but it’s COOL and fairly brutal, and it has some really incredible cinematography. The landscapes are so strange and barren and alien, you really get the sense that this is an ancient world we no longer have any connection to. And it’s also about like, the birth of dog & human companionship sooo it’s perfect.

Free Solo (2018) dir. Elizabeth Chai Vasarhelyi, Jimmy Chin

The Free Climbing Documentary. I loved climbing as a kid, I love outdoor sports, and I love movies that elicit a physical reaction in me, whether that’s horny, scared, real laughter, overwhelming shivers, or in the case of Free Solo - HORRIBLE SWEATING TENSION. Like, I knew about Alex Honnold beforehand because of this adventure film festival I go to every year and I followed him on IG so obviously I knew he lived, but the actual climb itself was torture. My hands sweat every time I see it!! It’s incredible, such a cool look into generally what the human body can do, and more specifically, why Honnold’s psychology and life means he’s so well suited to free soloing. It’s such an exercise in getting to know an individual and get invested in them, before they attempt something very potentially fatal.

Brokeback Mountain (2005) dir. Ang Lee

I can’t even talk about this. When I was around 13 I snuck downstairs to watch this on TV at 11pm in secret, and my life was forever changed. I wouldn’t be who I am if I hadn’t seen Brokeback at the age I did. I seriously can’t talk about this or I’ll write an even longer essay than this already is

God’s Own Country (2017) dir. Francis Lee

The antidote to Brokeback Mountain, I’m so glad I managed to see this one in the cinema too. It makes me cry every time, as someone who’s spent years working on a cold British farm with sheep it was very realistic, which is expected since Lee grew up on a farm in Yorkshire. I love that this movie isn’t really about being closeted, but about being so emotionally repressed and self-loathing that the main character finds it so hard to accept love. Or that he deserves to be loved. The cinnamontographies.... lordt... but also the intimacy and sex scenes are fucking searing wow who hasn’t seen this movie by now. 10 stars. 20 stars!!!

Tomboy (2011) dir. Céline Sciamma

I saw this years ago but I’ve never forgotten it, it cut so deep. It’s from the director of Portrait of a Lady on Fire and it’s about a gnc kid struggling with gender and misogyny and homophobia in a really raw, scrappy way, it reminded me very much of my own... childhood... ahh the central performance is amazing for such a young age. I haven’t seen Portrait yet but I feel like if you went nuts for that, you should definitely check this out, it’s lovely.

Donnie Darko (2001) dir. Richard Kelly

EVERY TIME I WATCH THIS MOVIE I UNDERSTAND LESS AND LESS and that’s what I love so much about it. I love surreal movies, I love time-fuckery and stuff about altered perception etc etc and Donnie Darko scratches all my itches. I wish I could find a way to figure out an IT AU for it, because I know it would work! Somehow! Plus it’s got the subdued 80s nostalgia and I found it at an age when I was really starting to explore movies and music and the soundtrack FUCKS.

Offside (2006) dir. Jafar Panahi

I wish more people knew about this!!! It’s an Iranian film about a disparate group of women and girls who are football fans and want to watch Iran’s qualifying match for the World Cup, but women aren’t allowed into the stadium, so they all get thrown into the Stadium Jail together? They don’t know each other beforehand, but it’s about their changing relationships with each other and the guards and just, their defiance alongside hearing the match from the outside and WOW it’s so lively. Great dialogue and very funny, and such a different kind of story from anything you usually see from Hollywood.

The Fall (2006) dir. Tarsem Singh

This movie... I guess it’s the ideal. This is the platonic ideal of a film for me, it has fantasy, magical realism, glorious visuals, amazing score and costumes and production design and a really interesting, heartbreaking relationship at the core of it. I don’t know why so many of my favourite films feature incredibly raw performances by child actors but this is another one, Catinca Untaru barely knew any English and improvised so much because of that, and it’s fascinating to watch! Also the dynamic with Lee Pace is one of my favourites, where a kid forms a friendship with a guardian figure who isn’t their parent, but the guardian grows to really care for them by the end. It’s like Paper Moon in that sense. What is there to even say about this movie, it’s pure magic joy tempered and countered by genuine gutwrenching emotional conflict in the real world, it’s also ABOUT old moviemaking, in a way, and it’s stunning to look at!

Mad Max Fury Road (2015) dir. George Miller

I know I included this in my “most rewatched” section but it deserves its own thing. We all know why this movie is fucking incredible. I remember clutching my armrests in the cinema and feeling like my skeleton was being blasted back into the seat behind me and tbh that is the high I’m constantly chasing when I go to see any movie. What a fucking gift this film is

Théo et Hugo dans le Même Bateau (2016) dir. Olivier Ducastel, Jacques Martineau

I only found this movie last year and it became an instant favourite. Initially I was just curious because I’d never seen a movie with unsimulated sex before, but it’s so much more than the 18 minute gay sex club orgy it opens with. No, not more than, AS WELL AS. The orgy is important because this movie is so candid and frank about sex and HIV treatment in the modern day, it was eye-opening. Another thing that really got me is that I’d never seen a real-time film before. It’s literally an hour and a half in the lives of these two men, their intense connection and conversation and conflict in the middle of the night in Paris, with some really nice night photography and just!!! Wow!!! AMAZING CHEMISTRY between the actors. This is such a gem if you’re comfortable with explicit sexual content.

Ok. This is already over 3k but film is obviously one of my ridiculous passions and I can and do talk about it for hours. I’ve been reading magazines about it for years, listening to podcasts and reading review blogs and recently, watching video essays on YouTube because the whole process is so interesting to me and I want to learn more!!

Recently I’ve been thinking a lot about the concept of valuing form over narrative. The idea that story can often come second to the deeper physical experience and emotional reaction that’s created by using ALL the elements of filmmaking and not just The Story, y’know? Whether that’s editing, shot composition, colour, the sound mix, the actors, how it should all be used to heighten the emotional state the script wants you to feel. And so, I think for a few years now this approach has been influencing the types of films I really, really love.

I think I love surreality and mind-bending magical realism in films specifically because the filmmakers have to use all those different tools to convey things that can be way too metaphysical for just... a script? I’m always chasing that physical response; if a movie can make me stop thinking “I wonder what it was like to set up that shot” and instead overwhelm that suspension of disbelief, if I can be terrified or woozy or crying for whatever reason, that’s what I’m looking for. That’s why I watch so many fuckin movies, and why I’ll always remember nights like seeing IT (2017) for giving me another favourite.

Thank you again for this question, I didn’t mean to go so overboard. Also there’s no way to do a readmore on tumblr mobile so apologies to anyone’s dashboard 😬

[yandere-society]

Day 6 | Coffee

Synopsis: Taehyung has always been protective of you– and as his little sister’s best friend, it’s your job to annoy him. When Hanukkah rolls around and you’re confronted with intolerance, Taehyung steps in, becoming a little more than protective.

The 12 Days of Black Christmas Event Masterlist

Pairing: Taehyung x Female Reader

Admin: @psycho-slytherin​

Trigger warnings: Profanity, mentions of violence, anti-Semitism

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ────── ⊰

“I have a tall vanilla latte for…” you narrow your eyes, only now reading the name written on the side of the cup: Voldemort. You sigh. “Taehyung. Tall vanilla latte for Taehyung.” He always does this.

Your best friend’s big brother approaches the counter with a smirk. “Are you sure that’s what it says on the cup?”

You hand him the drink. “Don’t you have better things to do than bother me at work?”

“I wish I did. Eunjin needed me to pick her up since someone–” he eyes you pointedly– “Is gonna be pulling a double today.”

“You’re being a bigger brat about it than Eunjin, and she’s the one that actually needs the lift. What kinda big brother are you?” You flap your hand at him. “Now shoo, I’ve got work to do.”

Taehyung smiles easily. “Yes, ma’am.”

Much, much later, you hang up your apron and sigh. It’s getting colder, and you’re not excited to learn the new holiday-themed drink recipes. If they’re not aesthetic enough, you know the customers will just throw a fit until you remake it. ‘Tis the season, after all.

You sigh. You’re tired of Christmas, tired of the decorations that are up from November to February, tired of consumerism, and tired of people assuming that you celebrate Christmas. 

You don’t. You’re Jewish. And while you’re happy that others enjoy the merry-jolly holiday cheer, you could do without the Christmas-ness of it all. It’s not like anyone’s ever said ‘happy Hanukkah’ to you.

“See ya around, y/n,” Namjoon, your manager, calls after you as you head out the door. “Merry Christmas.”

You smile dryly. “Yep, happy holidays.”

That Saturday, you’re at your best friend’s house, staring at– and yet not quite reading– your Economics notes.

“Man, like, how are you supposed to fix capitalism?” you groan eventually, flopping on Eunjin’s lap. 

“I dunno,” she laughs, laying down her notebook. “Throw billionaires at the Invisible Hand?”

“I can think of one place to throw them,” you retort, standing up and stretching. “I’m gonna make some coffee. Want anything?”

“A girlfriend.” “Besides that.”

“Some water?” You grin. “That I can do.” Humming to yourself, you make your way to Eunjin’s kitchen. You’ve been best friends since… well, forever. You’ve practically grown up in her house, and vice versa. Of course, the downside of being friends with Eunjin is…

“Boo.”

“Gah!” You yelp, a shudder running through your body when you feel Taehyung blow on the back of your neck. “You dickhead!”

Taehyung roars with laughter, not even flinching when you rear back and kick him in the shin. “Someone’s feeling feisty today.”

“You sure that someone is me?” you reply, fetching your favorite mug. “You’re the one going out of your way to bother us.”

Taehyung shrugs. “My winter break started early. It’s not like I’ve got finals to study for. So I’m bored. And when I’m bored…”

“You annoy us, I got it.” You stick your tongue out at him while spooning instant coffee into your mug. “Get yourself a girlfriend if you have so much time on your hands.”

Taehyung opens his mouth, closes it, and opens it again. “Sounds hard. I’ll pass.”

“You– whatever. I give up.” Coffee in hand, you march back to the living room without another word.

Several hours pass. “Economics is the study of the allocation of scarce resources,” you mimic your professor’s dry tone. “And economies of scale… can fuck all the way off.”

“Hey, what’s the difference between economic justice and economic equity?” Eunjin asks, staring at her notebook in confusion.

“I don’t know, let’s just be communist,” you reply. “Oh, I can’t pick you up from your internship tomorrow, I’m pulling another double shift.”

Eunjin ruffles your hair. “You work too hard. Yo, Tae! Can you pick me up tomorrow?”

“What, is little miss barista busy?” Taehyung calls from the living room. 

Yeah, you’re busy. Hanukkah starts soon, the twenty-fifth is next week, and the holiday rush seems to get more intense every year. Besides, your tuition isn’t getting any cheaper, and you could use every shift you can take. 

“It’s getting late, I’m gonna head home,” you yawn gathering your things. “See you tomorrow.”

“Yeah, see ya.”

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ────── ⊰

“I’ve got an oat milk macchiato for…” you sigh inwardly. On the cup is written the name Aphrodite, goddess of love. “Taehyung?”

And of course, Taehyung swoops in and plucks the drink from your hand. “Man, I thought I’d get you this time.”

“You’re early today,” you reply.

“Eh, yeah. I’ll kill time here while waiting for Eunjin.”

You’re tempted to reach across the counter and boop his nose, but then you’d have to go wash your hands and he’d be achieving his goal of keeping you from your job. “Suit yourself.”

A couple of hours pass. Taehyung continues nursing his macchiato while scrolling through his phone, and you try to ignore him as you make drink after drink. 

“Two Americanos and a raspberry iced tea for Julian?” you call, sliding the drinks across the counter. Business has slowed to a crawl, with the only customers besides Taehyung being three young men loudly discussing their weekend plans.

They approach, grabbing their drinks.

“Enjoy! Happy holidays,” you say brightly. It’s so slow your manager might cut you early. You begin wiping down the espresso machine when you sense someone staring at you. The guy from earlier– Julian– apparently didn’t follow his friends out the door. “Can I get you something else?” you ask automatically. 

“Don’t you mean merry Christmas?”

“Uh… what?”

“Christmas is next week. Don’t you mean merry Christmas?”

Is he high? “I thought I said happy holidays?” Maybe you imagined it and forgot to say it aloud.

“No, I heard that.” Julian takes another step forward, leaning over the counter. Namjoon is at the register, and you can tell he’s wondering if this guy is giving you trouble. “Happy holidays is what the liberals say to destroy Christmas instead of offending the other snowflakes.”

Your eyes widen. Is this seriously happening?

“So instead of this ‘happy holidays’ bullshit,” Julian says as his friends reenter, clearly looking for him, “you say merry Christmas, sir. Understand?”

Gross. He’s gross. You want him out of the store now. You glue on your best customer service smile and say the only thing you can think of– “Okay.”

Julian glares at you with what you can only call unwarranted hatred. “Say merry Christmas, or I’m never coming back.”

Good.

“Hey yo, Julian, let’s just go,” his friend tugs on his arm, glancing at you nervously.

You purse your lips. You have witnesses, and you know Namjoon will call the authorities at a moment’s notice if the guy turns violent. “Sorry, I don’t celebrate Christmas, so I prefer saying ‘happy holidays’ to include everyone.” 

“You don’t celebrate Christmas?” Julian spits. “What are you, a dirty Jew?”

You recoil at his words, too shocked to cry, to breath. This has never happened to you before. The way his tone paints you as less than human feels like a knife in your gut.

Julian notices your reaction. “You are, huh? How do you like gas chambers?”

“O-kay, line way crossed, buddy. How about you leave before-” Namjoon strolls towards towards Julian with purpose, but before he can reach the guy–

Taehyung clasps Julian’s shoulder tightly. “Hi.” he says smoothly, his voice laced with something dark. “That’s my friend you’re talking to. I think you’re going to want to take that back.”

“Julian, come on, man,” his friend urges, clearly worried that you’ll call the cops.

“Y/n, go to the back.” Namjoon says, not taking his eyes off Julian and Tae. “You’ve got a car, right? I’m letting you go early.”

“I-I-” Julian’s eyes, full of malice, follow you as you go to the back and hang up your apron. What else can you do? Namjoon is taking care of it, and Taehyung…

There was something in Taehyung’s voice that you’ve never heard before. Something dark, and protective, and… scary.

You decide to leave through the back after clocking out. You’re scared to pass Julian again. What if he comes back to the cafe to harass you?

You parked five minutes from the cafe, and with your head down and your hands jammed into your pockets, you speedwalk away. Just as you’re getting to the car, Eunjin calls you.

“Hey,” you say, voice cracking.

“Hey. I finished early today and Tae said you’d be able to give me a lift?”

“Ah, s-sure. What about Taehyung?”

“I dunno, man, he said something came up. See ya soon, okay?”

Something came up? But he was just in the cafe– whatever. You just want to leave. You spend the evening after work at Eunjin’s house, studying for your last final. Taehyung doesn’t arrive home until late, and you ambush him before the door’s even closed.

“What happened?” You ask.

“Nothing, nothing. Your manager called the cops and they needed witnesses,” Taehyung replies calmly.

“Oh.” Somehow you expected something less anticlimactic. “Well, I’m going to head home.”

“Be safe,” Eunjin calls from behind you.

“Yeah. Be safe.” Taehyung echoes. 

You swallow and step out into the night. They live so close by that you never bother to drive. 

What are you, a dirty Jew?

Your phone rings, startling you. “Hello?”

“Hey, y/n, it’s Namjoon. I just wanted to check in. You doing okay?”

“Y-yes,” you reply. “Did everything go alright with the police?”

“What police?”

Your brows furrow. “Ah– my friend said you called the police.”

“Oh, the tall guy? Nah, he just pulled that asshole outside. I didn’t see them after that. I was gonna call the police, but your friend said it wasn’t necessary.”

“Oh. What happened to… that guy?”

“Dunno. Are you okay coming into work tomorrow?” “Yeah, I’m fine. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Okay. And y/n?”

“Hm?”

“Happy Hanukkah.”

You crack a smile. “Happy Hanukkah.” By the time you hang up, you’re nearing home, and your car keys feel heavy in your pocket. You’ll just check, you decide. It’s a fifteen-minute drive to the cafe. You’ll just check. 

Fifteen minutes later, you’re standing in front of the darkened cafe. Taehyung took Julian outside, and then… what? Sent him on his way? But then why did he lie about the police?

“Ungh…” your ears pick up on a muffled groan coming from the alley behind the cafe. With dread settling in your stomach, you follow the noise into the alley.

If this were a horror movie, I’d be the first to die.

“Hello?” You whisper, switching on your phone flashlight.

“H-help…” Wait, is that coming from the dumpster? You hurriedly lift the lid, assaulted by the stench. Inside, curled up and covered in blood, is Julian.

“Oh my God, what happened to you?” You reach out, offering your hand.

“You– you! Don’t touch me!” He swats away your arm. “He’s gonna hurt me again! He told me not to get near you!”

“Who– you know what, okay, uh… let me call you an ambulance, alright?”

“He’s gonna find me,” Julian mumbles. “He’s gonna find me.”

“Who is? What happened?”

Julian meets your eyes, and you feel as though you’re looking at a dead man. “You really don’t know, do you?”

[fightersagainstnarccistic]

Rogue Fencing & the HEMA Alliance Leaders Want to Ban Cops from Clubs and Membership

Over the past few weeks the HEMA Alliance has had major changes. Kat Fanning is no longer president, and several key members of the board have stepped down.

The reason? Because there is an internal civil war taking place between the antifa psychos we have previously covered in this blog, and the members who are sane and just want to do historical fencing and not use HEMA as a vehicle to advance illegal, criminal and frankly evil practices.

As we have previously written about, Rogue Fencing is a club ran by Tanya Smith. Tanya Smith is part of these antifa martial art gyms specifically training people to clash with police and participate in riots that destroy cities. 

We have previously mentioned Tanya Smith and Rogue Fencing as being an antifa training center, participating in illegal behavior (inciting others to riot, training people to be a militia to fight police, discrimination, etc) in these articles,

https://fightersagainstnarccistic.tumblr.com/post/626484943349022720/far-historical-fencing-blog-that-promotes-antifa

https://fightersagainstnarccistic.tumblr.com/post/627588985429114880/racial-discrimination-by-hemaa-clubs

Long time HEMAA board member Aaron Pyneberg finally realized that this kind of thing was happening within HEMAA. He did an investigation and discovered that yes, Rogue Fencing had implemented an anti-cops policy on the front page of their website right below their HEMAA affiliation logo. 

To be clear, Tanya updated her website footer to include the discrimination against police but didn’t remove the HEMAA logo. We show that in our article about her club.

Here is the screencap again. Rogue Fencing identifies itself as a HEMAA club on their website and has a discriminatory statement about police. This is the truth; they never “left” HEMAA until Aaron caught wind of it, and it was some kind of psycho excuse to backpedal that failed. Kat knew about this and did nothing, because she supports antifa. We exposed Kat in this article, https://fightersagainstnarccistic.tumblr.com/post/627199444351320064/the-deal-with-kat-fanning-president-of-hema

Tanya Smith has attempted to claim that she “left the HEMAA” when she updated the footer, but this is a lie. If she had actually left the HEMAA then she would not have the HEMAA club logo on her website and would have removed it. Tanya is lying and trying to use her not having paid her annual dues on time as an excuse to justify her claims of leaving. That doesn’t mean she left, it just means she is an entitled bitch who was enjoying HEMAA membership while not paying dues cuz HEMAA GC were giving special treatment. 

After Aaron did an investigation and spoke to HEMAA governing council about her policy, they defended her. Aaron then quit in protest and let others in the HEMA community know why. Now these antifa assholes are slandering him, trying to label him as an over-reaction while actually trying to use the internet groups they control to shift HEMAA member opinion into supporting allowing the group to ban cops from joining and being members. 

Aaron gives his side of the story in his podcast and I recommend you listen to it. Here is the link, https://www.stitcher.com/show/all-things-hema-with-aaron-pynenberg/episode/episode-19-hemapolitics-leadership-and-respect-79041167

For some proof that this is what the leaders of HEMAA want to do- ban cops and anyone who opposes their antifa activities -- you simply need to read statements from influential HEMAA members and see who is liking their posts. Namely, Jason Barrons (former HEMAA president who controls HEMA United Facebook group and the r/wma subreddit -- the two largest online communities for HEMA discussion) and Brian Puckett (an antifa supporter who runs Minneapolis Amateur Swordfighting Association ) have made two public posts that we’re resharing here so you can see what they are doing and saying.

(probably worth reading our prior articles mentioning Jason for context, too

https://fightersagainstnarccistic.tumblr.com/post/626474814452924416/jason-barrons-responds-to-our-comments-and-our

https://fightersagainstnarccistic.tumblr.com/post/627579410578587648/to-jason-barrons-again 

and,

https://fightersagainstnarccistic.tumblr.com/post/624699657862381568/additional-narcissistic-abusers-who-assist

https://fightersagainstnarccistic.tumblr.com/post/624699667915128832/in-conclusion )

Basically they are trying to frame Tanya as being bullied and a victim, when in reality she is the one who is at fault in this scenario -- as is everyone who thinks the HEMAA should be a political vehicle to allow clubs to train people to participate in violent protests and clashes with police. 

At the bottom of Jason’s post is a reshare of Tanya Smith’s statement from Rogue Fencing. You can get a real sense of what kind of entitled prick Tanya is by how she tries to make it sound noble to support illegal criminal activity such as rioting and looting, and attacking random strangers while they are having lunch. 

Tanya Smith is an evil bitch who is good friends with Kaja of Valkyrie, whom we have previously covered in numerous posts, https://fightersagainstnarccistic.tumblr.com/post/627589661355835392/fighters-against-narcissistic-abusers-in-hema

Rogue Fencing is kind of like a sister school to Valkyrie. Tells you a lot about them.

Tanya in her public statements tries to make it seem like she is keeping people “safe” by barring police but the actual reason her club isn’t safe if police are there is because the police would arrest them for inciting riots -- which is ILLEGAL in the United States. 

These assholes try to say it “isn’t illegal to discriminate against professions” and confuse employment laws with the laws restricting non-profits and private clubs from denying membership. 

In reality numerous court cases in the US have proven that discrimination against professions which are likely to be occupied by people of a specific ethnicity IS illegal. In this case, Rogue Fencing is discriminating against WHITE police officers and that is why their ban is a violation of the Civil Rights Act.

Granted, these court cases which have established that occupation discrimination as an attempt to circumvent the wording of the Civil Rights Act involved African Americans being discriminated against but the door swings both ways. Just as some private clubs once tried to ban African Americans from joining by using their jobs and economic status as excuses, so too now are groups like the HEMAA and Rogue Fencing trying to do this to Caucasian male conservatives by “banning police”. They ae STILL violating the law and any lawyer who actually understands these laws and the case law surrounding it can tell you that this is a lawsuit that people like Aaron would easily win. 

No jury is going to be swayed by your idiotic claims that you need to ban police from clubs to make people “safe”. That will never hold up in court. The court literally has police in the building to keep everyone safe, and your wacky world explanations will NOT hold up inside a court house and a jury of sane people who are not far left extremists who think antifa is a good thing. 

So why do so many HEMAA leaders think they could get away with it? Well, these morons at the HEMAA Alliance are taking advice from idiots like Brian Puckett, who claims to be a “paralegal”. In reality a paralegal is an office assistant at a lawyer’s office. 

You do not require any special training to be a fucking secretary and Brian has none. He is not a legal expert and he is in fact an idiot because he does not realize that discrimination against occupations because you want to ban people of a certain gender, ethnicity, religious background and political affiliation (such as police who are predominantly Caucasian males with Christian backgrounds that vote Republican) from joining your club IS a violation of the Civil Rights Act. There are numerous cases where juries have found this to be illegal as the intention of the club was to ban people for their protected status. 

Their arguments would NOT hold up under scrutiny in a court of law, because Tanya and others like her are in fact violating the law because their goal is to eliminate people of certain genders, ethnicity and politics from joining their clubs. 

Yet, these antifa nutters concoct elaborate schemes and trash talk others for rightfully calling them out on their bullshit. Here is Brian’s idiotic post where he tries to paint Aaron as the bad guy. He has gotten 80 people to “like” this post, and we’re also going to share all of their names here so that the sane people in the HEMA community know who they should blacklist from their own events and clubs, as these are toxic people sabotaging the growth of HEMA to advance political agendas that have nothing to do with swordfighting.

Here is Brian Puckett (who, again I remind you is a secretary AND NOT a lawyer) giving extremely bad advice and manipulating the facts to try to convince HEMAA members that the people that want to ban police are the “good guys” and not the villains. 

The only people who don’t like police are the criminals that have something they want to hide and get away with. 

Again, Brian tries to stick to the precise wording of the law and doesn’t have enough legal knowledge to know that it is the SPIRIT of the laws that matter the most. 

Banning police because what you really want to ban are straight Caucasian males who are Christian and vote Republican (which is predominantly what police are as a demographic) IS STILL A VIOLATION OF THE CIVIL RIGHTS ACT.

We know who this is who they are discriminating against because people like Tanya have made social media posts hating on this group of people. Clara Smith has too, and the entire ‘Fighters against Racism” Facebook group we previously covered has these kinds of hate posts made frequently too. 

Also trying to use the ‘Freedom of Study” policy to justify being able to ban police is absurd. That policy was created because the organization most early HEMAA members left -- ARMA -- tried to control members by limiting information from manuscripts that was available and blacklist members for studying alternative interpretations than the official ones. Brian knows this and is intentionally trying to manipulate facts to justify illegal behavior that will subject HEMAA as an organization to a lawsuit while at the same time, advancing outright evil things like antifa which harm society.

Here is a list of all the people who liked Brian’s post. You’ll note many are well known people in the HEMAA. 

We suggest at this point that the majority of HEMAA members leave the HEMAA and form a new organization that blacklists these people. That is the only way you’re going to stop the spread of these assholes from continuing to use HEMA as a vehicle to harass and bully people while claiming to be virtuous. They are not the good guys -- these are the bad guys. 

There are thousands of people in the USA who study HEMA. 

It’s less than 100 in the community who are the problem.

Unfortunately many of them have leader positions in the HEMAA and at clubs in it. 

Some of these people don’t even live in the US. 

And don’t think that the current Governing Council is going to kick these people out. The current GC and even its board has antifa sympathizers on it.

Jordan Hinckley is just another one of these antifa lunatics. And of course somehow Clara got onto the GC to replace Aaron. The same Clara who posted this to her wall,

The antifa people are leaders of the HEMA Alliance.

They aren’t going away. 

If you want to stop the antifa nutters from continuing to bully and harass people, here is what you do.

Step 1. Leave the HEMAA Alliance

Step 2. Get your insurance policy for your club from the same company they use. The price is the same. It’s the same insurance they give to every martial art club in the US. 

Step 3. Leave the FB group HEMA United and the r/wma subreddits. These are controlled by Jason Barrons and he uses it to harass and bully people while spreading bad information. It is a recruitment ground for Jason to bring people into his antifa bullshit.

We’re previously exposed how Jason uses the groups to harass people,

https://fightersagainstnarccistic.tumblr.com/post/626365181118840832/abuse-by-detrio-moderator-at-reddit-wma-to-help

Do not join the /wma group at reddit. You should leave it and form new groups without him and these other people in them.

Step 4. Write blog articles warning people away from the HEMA Alliance and publicly declare you are leaving it. If your club leader is one of the people mentioned on this blog who supports antifa then leave it and form a new club without them.

Step 5: Create a policy where people who advocate for crime and illegal conduct are blacklisted from your groups. That is legal and it will allow you to ban antifa supporters like these idiots. 

Leaving these groups and preventing them from gaining power in the new group is the only way that these people can be stopped from continuing to abuse their influence. 

They only have power because you give them it by joining their groups. Leave their groups and they lose that power. 

PS: Also screenshot every discriminatory statement these people make about “cis white men” and conservatives, against Christians. These screenshots can be used by a competent lawyer to prove their discrimination against jobs like cops is just a front for violating the Civil Rights Act. It doesn’t even matter if the statements are made by people that are Caucasian and male (like Jason and Brian are) -- as we discussed in our first article on this blog, narcissistic psychopaths are not rational people and driven to virtue signal as a way to gain influence and power. They will even make statements that seem to apply to themselves in an effort to make themselves seem like an “ally” to those they are trying to manipulate. 

It doesn’t matter what they are - -screenshot all discriminatory statements they make regardless of who makes it. They prove as an organization there is prejudice against “cis white men” who are conservative and that is whom they are trying to bully and harass to promote antifa idealogies. 

[mrsrhys23]

Be alright (Part two)

Paring: Colt x MC

A/N:  I don’t own any of these characters, they belong to Pixelberry Studios. 

I rewrote this because the first attempt was awful- Sorry about any mistakes, i’m seriously sleep deprived so i wouldn't be surprised if this makes no sense whatsoever. 

Permatag: @desiree---1986​​ @cordoniaqueensworld​​ @itschoicesstuff​​ @emilypowell001​

RoD: @lovehugsandcandy​​ @troublemakerinspace​​

Later that night after Colt and Ellie came down off the roof they ordered themselves a pizza then settled down onto the sofa, switching the tv on, opening netflix and putting Bates Motel on- the new show they had started binging on. 

They had started it at 21:30 yesterday night and didn’t stop until 7:30am that morning after watching Psycho, they got through the whole of season one and one episode of season two. It was safe to say they were addicted. Ellie still hadn’t’ decided what to make of Norma yet eleven episodes in, one moment she felt sorry for her then she did or said something weird that creeped her out. All in all she was quite emotionally invested by now. 

Ellie snuggled up against her boyfriend’s side as they snacked on their pizza and watched the show, pausing it now and again to discuss something that had just happened or guess was about to happen. 

The truth was Colt and Ellie had been beginning to drift apart, they didn’t spend much time together anymore; she had missed this. Missed being that close to him. They were growing apart and she hated it. It was unfair after everything that Ellie had put up with from him. Frankly, she didn’t even remember the last time they sat down in the evening and watched something together other than the day before and that night. 

Colt leaned forward grabbing another slice of pizza from the box on the coffee table, catching a glance of Ellie’s face- she seemed preoccupied and not on the television.

Colt pressed pause, “What did you do that for?” Ellie snapped, she didn’t want to have an argument with him, not tonight, he was upset and she frankly just didn’t have the energy for it. 

“What is wrong with you?” Colt asked, placing his slice of pizza back down into the box and facing her properly. 

Ellie shook her head, sitting up properly, bringing her legs underneath her. “It doesn’t matter. Lets just watch,” Ellie mumbled, turning away from her. 

“Talk to me,” He instructed, “What was the point of all that bullshit you said up on the roof if you’re not gonna actually talk to me either?”

“Bullshit?” she scoffed, shaking her head, “I was trying to get you to see sense. To see that I actually love you. God knows why, I mean just look at you. Us.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Are you really that pigheaded that you just don’t remember? Or are you lying? Playing innocent?”

“Okay, what the fuck? What have I done? I was only asking you if you’re okay.” Ellie got to her feet, “I don’t want to argue with you. Not now.” With that she headed into the kitchen, grabbing a glass from the draining board and pouring herself a glass of water. She leaned against the kitchen counter top, sipping at her drink when Colt walked in, standing in the doorway with his arms crossed. 

“Talk.”

She slammed the glass down onto the counter top- Colt slightly amazed that the glass didn’t shatter in her vice like grip. She turned to him, her chest rising and falling quickly. “You wanna talk? Let's talk then!” she yelled, throwing up her arms. “Firstly, what the fuck was tonight about? Having a pity party on the roof?! Communication goes both ways Colt, we should talk to each other, you should talk to me!”

“You weren’t here!” he yelled back at her, “You were off doing god knows what with your dad!”

“Newsflash: the world doesn’t actually revolve around you! Yes, I was with my dad trying to fix a relationship that you helped to break. For years my dad has  been the only person I’ve had, the one person I could rely on so i’m sorry if my relationship with my dad means something unlike yours,” she snarled. 

Colt let out a bitter chuckle, “I helped break? Really?” I’m sorry, I didn’t force you to commit, what was it?  Obstruction of justice, street racing, driving without a learner’s permit, aiding and abetting, oh and theft! Don’t blame it on me! Blame Logan or actually blame yourself, nobody made you get into that car with him. Come on, if you had stayed at that party, how much trouble do you think you really would have gotten in to? Because I reckon Detective wheeler wouldn’t have let anything happen to his little girl? Do you? Daddy's little girl, eh? We both know all you ever did was suck up to him.” 

Ellie stepped forward, her fist connecting with the side of his jaw. Colt laughed as he dabbed away a little trickle of blood that started to flow from his nose. 

“Wow, really starting to show your true colours now,  aren't you?  As for my relationship with my dad, you know nothing about it and now he’s dead anyway so-” “I lost a parent too Colt! It happens!  Stop using the ‘I lost my daddy card’ it’s childish!” She bellowed, cutting him off. “It’s getting really old.” 

Ellie grabbed the glass from the counter-top launching at the wall, it shattering upon impact. 

“Says you! Says the little girl stood in the kitchen yelling and breaking glasses. You're nineteen now but Jesus you don’t act like an adult!” 

Ellie shoved him against the wall, holding him in place by his arms. She leaned in closer, so they were face to face. ““I’m more grown up than you! You little twat!” She bellowed, she stepped back from him slightly. “ The nearly twenty year old with daddy issues and is so self-obsessed. So fucking hungry to be in control all the time, i mean that really is your megalomaniacal side coming out isn’t it?” She asked, smirking. 

“What is this even about? We were watching TV then you’re looking like Norman Bates when he’s in his trance looking like you want to  decapitate someone.” 

“I am sick of this!” she screamed, “Why don’t you remember? All the bullshit I had to put up with from you, all your snide little remarks, locking me in a fucking vault with the enemy, quite the boyfriend of the year!” she yelled, giving him a condescending round of applause,” This relationship is so one sided because you are so self-obsessed that you don’t see that you hurt people, that you make them feel like shit because you’re so screwed up.” 

“Go on then, what have I said that’s so bad? So diabolical that you feel the need to behave like a little bitch?”

“Do you want another punch? If so, call me a bitch again. Go on, I dare you.” 

“You really are a child, aren't you?” Colt snarled at her. “How dare you blame me for your dad. You know it was Logan and you for that matter or maybe he just saw what a spiteful little bitch you are. Either would work.” 

Ellie went to slap him but Colt caught her hand just before it made contact. “Let go of me,” she demanded, looking at Colt's hand clamped around her wrist. 

“Or what?” 

“I’m a cop's daughter. I could kick your arse if i wanted to.”

“I could kick yours,” Colt shrugged, “ I’m bigger than you, stronger than you but then again, you’re the one that likes to remind everyone that violence isn't the answer, aren't you? Your dad saw right through you didn't he?  You conniving little wench.” 

“Conniving? Wow, big word for a dumbass, sure you know what it means?” she asked, yanking her arm from his grasp, glaring up at him. “I gave up everything for you! School, life, my dad, everything! I’ve wasted so much time on you.” 

“I never asked you to.”

 “No,” she agreed, shaking her head, “No,  you didn't  but you sacrifice things when you love someone. I gave up everything to be with you and you’ve never trusted me, have you? The casino- you didn't tell me what was going on. You said I didn't have the stomach for it.” 

“I was right, You didn't. You fucked it up, “ he explained. 

“Get off your high horse, would you? It really is pissing me off.”  

“Then there’s the fucking door,” he said, pointing to it, “If i make you so unhappy fuck off. 

“Are you being serious?” She asked. 

“Yeah.” Colt headed to the bedroom, taking Ellie’s suitcase from under the be putting it on top, then flung open the wardrobe door and started shoving Ellie’s belongs into the back. 

“Colt,” she started. 

“No, Get out. Take all you’re fucking shit and get out!” 

“Fine!” She screamed at him, talking over shoving what she could into her suitcase. Tears were clouding her vision although she wasn't certain if it was from how angry she was or the realisation that her relationship was coming to an end. At that moment she found it hard to care as she ripped clothes down off the hangers, breaking a few of them in the process. 

Colt stood by the door watching her pack, his arm folded over his chest. “Hurry up,” he commanded. 

After Ellie had packed everything so possible could she zipped up the case, hauling it off the bed. Colt stepped forward, grabbed her forearm and led her towards the door. He fiddled with the key in the lock, cursing  himself for looking at it earlier, he wanted her out. Now or he was seriously going to lose his temper.

Colt yanked the door open it narrowly missing Ellie’s head. They both stood in the threshold, locking eyes for a minute. “GET OUT!” 

Ellie grabbed her suitcase putting  it into the hall first then stepped out, taking one last look at him before slamming the door shut with all  of her strength behind her.

[buffysresources-archive]

╰    ♡    *    SENTENCE  STARTERS    ─     HEATHERS    !

feel  free  to  change  pronouns  if  /  where  needed  .    trigger  warnings  for  some  nsfw  stuff  ,  death  ,  suicide  ,  etc  .

‘  (   name  )  told me she teaches people real life  .  ’ ‘  real life sucks losers dry  .  ’ ‘  if you want to fuck with the eagles  ,  you have to learn to fly  .  ’ ‘  so you teach people how to spread their wings  &  fly  ?  ’ ‘  you’re beautiful  .  ’ ‘  what is your damage  ?  ’ ‘  i need you to forge a hot  &  horny  ,  but realistically low key note  .  ’ ‘  you don’t have anything for her either  .  ’ ‘  come on  ,  it’ll be very  .  ’ ‘  the note’ll give her shower nozzle masturbation material for weeks  .  ’ ‘  i’ll think about it  .  ’ ‘  don’t think  .  ’ ‘  pilgrims  ,  indians  ,  tater - tots  .  it’s a real party continent  .  ’ ‘  i think i’d probably miss my own birthday for a date  .  ’ ‘  if you’re going to openly be a bitch  -  .  ’ ‘  why can’t we talk to different kinds of people  ?  ’ ‘  fuck me gently with a chainsaw  .  ’ ‘  do i look like mother theresa  ?  ’ ‘  does it not bother you that everyone in this school thinks that you’re a piranha  ?  ’ ‘  like i give a shit  .  ’ ‘  they all want me as a friend or a fuck  .  ’ ‘  i’d change my life  .  new clothes  ,  new haircut  ,  new house  ,  new home  .  ’ ‘  how sad  !  blowing all your cash on two days of trying to be hip  .  ’ ‘  that’s got to be the most spooky ass question i’ve ever heard  .  ’ ‘  this is the part i hate  :  the waiting  .  ’ ‘  i’d say we’re like twenty minutes from major humilation  .  ’ ‘  deep down all teenagers are the same  .  ’ ‘  didn’t you see the breakfast club  ?  ’ ‘  what do i get out of being friends with losers  ?  ’ ‘  i give them a piece of a winner  &  they stain me with loserness  .  ’

‘  i think we should use the money for an end - of - the - world - get - together  .  ’ ‘  we could invite guys  .  ’ ‘  i’d pay madonna one million dollars to ride my face like the kentucky derby  .  ’ ‘  she should be paying me  ,  though  .  ’ ‘  don’t tell me  .  crest would be stained with loserness  .  ’ ‘  a dime increases the time  !  a buck brings good luck  !  ’ ‘  i’m sorry  ?  what are you oozing about  ?  ’ ‘  that episode with the note back there was for all of us to enjoy  .  ’ ‘  you seem determined to ruin my day  .  ’ ‘  we made a girl want to consider suicide  .  what a scream  ,  what a jest  .  ’ ‘  come on you jerk  .  ’ ‘  you know you used to have a sense of humor  .  ’ ‘  a true friend’s work is never done  .  ’ ‘  color me nauseous  .  ’ ‘  geez  ,  don’t listen to them  .  ’ ‘  you know holden caulfield wouldn’t put up with their bogus nonsense  .  ’ ‘  god (name)  ,  drool much  ?  ’ ‘  greetings  &  salutations  .  ’ ‘  this may seem like a stupid question  .  ’ ‘  there are no stupid questions  .  ’ ‘  that’s the stupidest question i’ve ever heard  .  ’ ‘  let’s kick his ass  .  ’ ‘  too old for that crap  .  let’s give him a good scare though  .  ’ ‘  you going to eat this  ?  ’ ‘  what did your boyfriend say when you told him you were moving to sherwood  ,  ohio  ?  ’ ‘  it seems to have an open door policy for assholes though  ,  doesn’t it  ?  ’ ‘  what did you say dickweed  ?  ’ ‘  i’ll repeat myself  .  ’ ‘  god  ,  they won’t expell him  .  they’ll just suspend him for a week or something  .  ’ ‘  they should throw his ass in jail  .  ’ ‘  all (name) really did was ruin two pairs of pants  .  ’ ‘  can you bleach out urine stains  ?  ’ ‘  you seem pretty amused  .  ’ ‘  i thought you were giving up on high school guys  .  ’ ‘  never say never  .  ’ ‘  did you have a brain tumor for breakfast  ?  ’ ‘  anyway  ,  i can say never to high school  .  ’ ‘  no way  ,  no day  !  ’ ‘  give it up girl  !  ’ ‘  god  ,  that was unbelievable  .  ’ ‘  so tonights the night  .  ’ ‘  blow it tonight girl  &  it’s keggers with kids all next year  .  ’ ‘  so what was the first week of spring vacation withdrawal like  ?  ’ ‘  any contestants worth mentioning  ?  ’ ‘  there’s kind of a dark horse now in the running  .  ’ ‘  will somebody please tell me why i read this spy crap  .  ’ ‘  because you’re an idiot  .  ’ ‘  you going to pull a big gulp with that  ?  ’ ‘  if your nice i’ll let you buy me a slurpee  .  ’ ‘  you know your 7-11 speak pretty well  .  ’ ‘  there’s always a 7-11 any town  ,  any time  .  ’ ‘  the extreme always makes an impression  .  ’ ‘  did you say a cherry or coke slurpee  ?  ’ ‘  he seem to enjoy tearing things down more than putting things up  .  ’ ‘  must be rough moving place to place  .  ’ ‘  everybody’s life’s got static  .  ’ ‘  is your life perfect  ?  ’ ‘  it’s not perfect  .  ’ ‘  i don’t really like my friends  .  ’ ‘  i don’t really like your friends  .  ’ ‘  it’s like they’re just people i work with  &  our job is being popular  &  shit  .  ’ ‘  maybe it’s time for a vacation  .  ’ ‘  throw your coats on the bed  .  ’ ‘  that exam was so bogus  .  ’ ‘  did you girls bring your partying slippers  .  ’ ‘  she loves to party  .  ’ ‘  i want to kill  &  you have to believe it’s for more than selfish reasons  .  ’ ‘  you have to believe it’s for more than selfish reasons  ,  more than a spoke in my menstrual cycle  .  ’ ‘  you have to believe me  .  ’ ‘  so are you a cheerleader  ?  ’ ‘  it’s so great to be able to talk to a girl  &  not have to ask what’s your major  .  ’ ‘  so when you go to college  ,  what kind of subjects do you think you’ll study  ?  ’ ‘  let’s go back to the party  .  ’ ‘  you’re just so hot tonight  .  ’ ‘  i can’t control myself  .  ’ ‘  so what do you say we head up to my room  &  have a real party  .  ’ ‘  that pecker actually scored something on his own  ?  ’ ‘  (name)  ,  ever do cocaine  ?  ’ ‘  ever since phil collins did that anti - drug thing on mtv i refuse everything  .  ’ ‘  jeez  ,  right  ,  then why don’t i do drugs  ?  ’ ‘  hey  ,  don’t run away now  .  ’ ‘  seventeen is the last year mom buys the twinkies  .  ’ ‘  christ  ,  i can’t explain it  .  ’ ‘  i understand i must stop (name)  .  ’ ‘  how’s my little cheerleader  ?  ’ ‘  now i know everyone at your high school isn’t so uptight  .  ’ ‘  i don’t feel so great  .  ’ ‘  i have a little prepared speech i give when my suitor wants more than i’d like to give him  .  ’ ‘  save the speeches for malcom x  .  i just wanna get laid  .  ’ ‘  i just wanna get laid  .  ’ ‘  you don’t deserve my fucking speech  !  ’ ‘  (name) says you’re being a real cooze  .  ’ ‘  i feel awful  ,  like i’m going to throw up  .  ’ ‘  can we jam  ,  please  ?  ’ ‘  i sound like a psycho  .  ’ ‘  let me dream of a world without (name)  ,  a world where i’m free  .  ’ ‘  you stupid cunt  !  ’ ‘  you goddamn bitch  !  ’ ‘  you were nothing before you met me  !  ’ ‘  what’s my thanks  ?  ’ ‘  i get paid in puke  !  ’ ‘  lick it up  ,  baby  .  lick  .  it  .  up  .  ’ ‘  monday morning you’re history  .  ’ ‘  dreadful etiquette  .  i apologize  .  ’ ‘  i saw the croquet set - up in the back  .  up for a match  ?  ’ ‘  no wonder you looked so mangled when i came through the window  .  ’ ‘  i’ve always treated (name)’s teen queen power play as bullshit  .  ’ ‘  but i’m really scared  .  ’ ‘  who am i going to eat lunch with on monday  ?  ’ ‘  i sound like an after school special  .  ’ ‘  that was my first game of strip croquet  ,  you know  .  ’ ‘  it’s a lot more interesting than just flinging off your clothes  &  boning away on the neighbor’s swing set  .  ’ ‘  what a night  .  ’ ‘  what a life  .  ’ ‘  now blah - blah - blah is all i do  .  ’ ‘  i use my grand i.q. to figure out what gloss to wear  &  how to hit three keggers before curfew  .  some genius  .  ’ ‘  killing her won’t solve anything  .  ’ ‘  everybody would be cast fucking adrift  .  ’ ‘  i’ll pray for rain  .  ’ ‘  it was good for me too  ,  sparky  .  ’ ‘  just saying it’s not hard to end a life  .  ’ ‘  there’s a difference between the most popular girl in school  &  dead  .  ’ ‘  i guess i don’t know what the hell i’m talking about  .  ’ ‘  i know exactly what the hell you’re talking about  &  you’re right  ,  you don’t know what the hell you’re talking about  .  ’ ‘  i know exactly what the hell you’re talking about  .  ’ ‘  you don’t know what the hell you’re talking about  .  ’ ‘  let’s just grow up  ,  be adults  ,  &  die  .  ’ ‘  i’d like to see (name) puke her guts out  .  ’ ‘  let's just concoct ourselves a little hangover cure that'll induce her to spew red  ,  white  ,  &  blue  .  ’ ‘  what’s the upchuck factor on that  ?  ’ ‘  don’t be a dick  .  that stuff’ll kill her  .  ’ ‘  pull the plug on that shit  .  ’ ‘  she’d never drink anything that looks like that  .  ’ ‘  she won’t be able to tell what she’s drinking  .  ’ ‘  you’re not funny  .  ’ ‘  we both said a lot of things we didn’t mean last night  .  ’ ‘  how the hell’d you get in here  .  ’ ‘  i whipped this up  .  family recipe  .  ’ ‘  did you put a phlegm globber in it or something  ?  ’ ‘  i’m not drinking that piss  .  ’ ‘  i knew this stuff would be too intense  .  ’ ‘  intense  ?  grow up  .  ’ ‘  you think i’ll drink it just because you call me chicken  .  ’ ‘  just give me the cup  ,  jerk  .  ’ ‘  no shit  ,  sherlock  .  ’ ‘  i just killed my best friend  .  ’ ‘  what are we going to tell the cops  ?  ’ ‘  fuck it if she can’t take a joke  .  ’ ‘  stop kidding around  .  ’ ‘  i’m going to have to send my s.a.t. scores to san quentin instead of stanford  .  ’ ‘  i’m just a little freaked  ,  all right  ?  ’ ‘  you got what you wanted  ,  you know  .  ’ ‘  it’s one thing to want somebody out of your life  .  ’ ‘  it's one thing to want somebody out of your life  .  it's another thing to serve them a wake-up cup of liquid drainer  .  ’ ‘  we did a murder  .  ’ ‘  adolescence is a period of life fraught with anxiety  &  confusion  .  ’ ‘  people think just because you’re beautiful  &  popular  ,  life is easy  &  fun  .  ’ ‘  nobody understood i had feelings too  .  ’ ‘  i die knowing no one knew the real me  .  ’ ‘  that’s good  .  have you done this before  ?  ’ ‘  call me when the shuttle lands  .  ’ ‘  let’s talk emotions  .  ’ ‘  i realize now i wasn’t really boring  ,  she was just dissatisfied with her life  .  ’ ‘  (name) was cool  ,  but cruel  .  ’ ‘  the good looks  &  bad manners gave her power but it could not give her happiness  .  ’ ‘  it’s just so unfair  !  ’ ‘  you could actually be digesting food  .  ’ ‘  fuck it  .  ’ ‘  she always said you couldn’t accessorize for shit  .  ’ ‘  i thought she was your usual airhead bitch  .  guess i was wrong  .  ’ ‘  guess i was wrong  .  lot of us were  .  ’ ‘  what a waste  .  ’ ‘  oh the humanity  .  ’ ‘  do i deliver or do i deliver  ?  ’ ‘  hurry up  ,  we’re going to get caught  .  ’ ‘  does this have something to do with menstrual cramps  &  shit  ?  ’ ‘  that was seriously warped  .  ’ ‘  she hated you  !  you hated her  !  .  ’ ‘  what are you smiling at  ?  ’ ‘  goddamn .  will somebody please tell me why I smoke these damn things  ?  ’ ‘  this is a tragic thing  &  sometimes i have a hard time dealing with it  &  stuff  .  ’ ‘  why did you kill such hot snatch  .  ’ ‘  that’s a joke  ,  man  .  people are so serious  .  ’ ‘  hail mary who aren’t in heaven  ,  pray for us sinners  . . .  so we don’t get caught  .  ’ ‘  i just want my high school to be a nice place  .  ’ ‘  did that sound bitchy  ?  ’ ‘  that pudwapper just stepped on my foot  .  ’ ‘  i’m sure your friends are happy to hear that  .  ’ ‘  i hope it isn’t going to be one of those nights where they get shitfaced  &  take us to a pasture to tip cows  .  ’ ‘  oh shit  ,  cowtipping is the fucking greatest  .  ’ ‘  when i get that feeling i need sexual healing  .  ’ ‘  yeah  ,  right  ,  asshole  .  ’ ‘  what is this shit  ?  .  ’ ‘  seven high schools in seven states  &  the only thing different was my locker combination  .  ’ ‘  don’t smile like that  ,  jesus  !  ’ ‘  our love is god  .  let’s go get a slurpee  .  ’ ‘  let’s go get a slurpee  .  ’ ‘  this thing leaves a bad taste in my mouth  .  ’ ‘  i’m sorry  ?  i don’t get it  .  ’ ‘  don’t shut up  .  i’d like to know just what i did  .  ’ ‘  i guess my emotions took over  .  ’ ‘  we won’t be using blanks this time  .  ’ ‘  you can’t be serious  ?  ’ ‘  hey listen  ,  my bonnie  &  clyde days are over  .  ’ ‘  now prepare to be a little disappointed  .  ’ ‘  shut the fuck up  ,  all right  .  ’ ‘  lighten up  ,  dude  .  ’ ‘  in those woods is some of the finest pussy in the school  &  we don’t even have to buy it a hamburger  &  a diet coke  .  ’ ‘  so do we just start fucking  ?  ’ ‘  i was hoping you’d rip my clothes off me  ,  sport  .  ’ ‘  did you miss him completely  ?  ’ ‘  i always hear gunshots when i’m high before noon  .  ’ ‘  life’s a crazy bitch  .  ’ ‘  life’s a crazy bitch  ,  don’t try to analyze it  .  ’ ‘  you took the suggestion as an opportunity to play yet another round of let’s laugh at the hippie  .  ’ ‘  you believed it because you wanted to believe it  .  ’ ‘  your true feelings were too gross  &  icky for you to face  .  ’ ‘  i did not want them dead  .  ’ ‘  ah  ,  young love  .  ’ ‘  my teen angst bullshit now has a body count  .  ’ ‘  the most popular people in the school are dead  .  ’ ‘  everybody’s sad  ,  but it’s a good kind of sad  .  ’ ‘  it’s god versus my boyfriend  &  god’s losing  .  ’ ‘  kill the jukebox  .  ’ ‘  i may be a geek but i have my pride  .  ’ ‘  why are you dissing me  ,  (name)  ?  ’ ‘  i’m trying to redefine the high school experience  .  ’ ‘  you’re ignoring the high school experience  .  ’ ‘  people are dead  &  all you can think to do is whip up some warped pity party  .  ’ ‘  if we’re going to ever build respect for each other  ,  it’s gotta be something  . . .  something real  .  ’ ‘  it was chaos  .  fucking chaos  .  ’ ‘  chaos is great  .  ’ ‘  chaos is what killed the dinosaurs  ,  darling  .  ’ ‘  we scare people into not being assholes  .  ’ ‘  our way is not our way  .  ’ ‘  i’m telling it to you  !  you  !  ’ ‘  nothing good can come from suicide  ,  from murder  ,  from death  .  ’ ‘  you can be so immature  .  ’ ‘  we beat the bitches  .  ’ ‘  do you like your father  ?  ’ ‘  never given the matter much thought  .  ’ ‘  in some sick way  ,  we unclogged the sinuses of the school  .  ’ ‘  if we’re going to keep the school healthy  ,  it’s gotta be through something having to with life  ,  not death  .  ’ ‘  whoa  ,  metaphor tennis anyone  ?  ’ ‘  if you put a nazi in a concentration camp  ,  does that make you a nazi  ?  ’ ‘  that’s it  ,  we’re breaking up  .  ’ ‘  you can’t bring them back  .  you must know that  .  ’ ‘  i��m not trying to bring back anyone except maybe myself  .  ’ ‘  to think there was a time when i thought you were cool  .  ’ ‘  if you can’t deal with me now  ,  just stay home  .  ’ ‘  if you can’t deal with me now  ,  just stay home  &  shoot your t.v.  ,  blow away a couple toasters or something  .  ’ ‘  just don’t come to school  &  don’t mess with me  .  ’ ‘  you’ll be back  !  ’ ‘  where did you get these  ?  ’ ‘  what is this  ?  blackmail  ?  ’ ‘  i’ll give you a week’s lunch money  .  ’ ‘  i don’t believe it  ,  i’m winning  .  ’ ‘  don’t get cocky  ,  girl  .  ’ ‘  i know i’m not as exciting as your other friends  .  ’ ‘  your daydreams are a lot better than my realities  ,  believe me  .  ’ ‘  nice guys finish last  .  i should know  .  ’ ‘  nice guys finish last  .  ’ ‘  you’re so polluted  .  ’ ‘  i don’t see what gives you the right to lecture  .  ’ ‘  some people just don’t matter  .  why should those who do carry their weight  ?  ’ ‘  some people just don’t matter  .  ’ ‘  it’s not even your turn  .  ’ ‘  maybe by the time we head back  ,  your tampon’ll be flushed  .  ’ ‘  christ  ,  doesn’t anybody knock  ?  ’ ‘  so i’m a dark horse  ,  huh  ?  ’ ‘  you make me blush  .  ’ ‘  did you come to tell me something  ?  something nice  ,  remotely apologetic  .  ’ ‘  i say it’s about time we got down to doing what we do best  .  ’ ‘  just finish your drink  &  get out  .  ’ ‘  these little programs eat up suicide with a spoon  .  ’ ‘  if we’re not going to watch that program  ,  can i put on my game  ?  ’ ‘  hey kids  ,  make your parents  &  teachers feel like shit  !  ’ ‘  get the respect in death you’ll never get in life  !  ’ ‘  get up off the floor  ,  your dress is getting filthy  .  ’ ‘  everybody cares about youth  ,  not the individual  .  ’ ‘  all we want is to be treated like human beings  ,  not like guinea pigs to be experimented on  &  not like bunny rabbits to be patronized  .  ’ ‘  all we want is to be treated like human beings  .  ’ ‘  i do not patronize bunny rabbits  .  ’ ‘  treated like human beings  ?  is that what you said little miss voice of a generation  ?  ’ ‘  just how do you think adults act with other adults  ?  ’ ‘  adults can be horrible to other adults  .  ’ ‘  when teenagers complain that they want to be treated like human beings it’s usually because they are being treated like human beings  .  ’ ‘  i guess i picked the wrong time to be a human being  .  ’ ‘  you’ll live  .  ’ ‘  another case of a geek trying to imitate the popular people of the school  &  failing miserably  .  ’ ‘  i said i was sorry  .  ’ ‘  you are out of control  .  ’ ‘  (name) couldn’t take the heat so she got out of the kitchen  .  just think what a better place the world would be if every nimrod followed her cue  .  ’ ‘  just shut up  &  turn on the radio  .  ’ ‘  sometimes i feel like i’m on that island  &  gilligan can be just so stupid sometimes  .  ’ ‘  dude  ,  you’ve got to remember if it wasn’t for the courage of the fearless crew  ,  the minnow would be lost  .  ’ ‘  god has cursed me  ,  i think  .  the last time i had sex  ,  the guy killed himself the next day  .  i’m failing math  ’ ‘  the last time i had sex  ,  the guy killed himself the next day  .  ’ ‘  i’m failing math  .  ’ ‘  we’ll crucify her  !  ’ ‘  my whole life is a mess  .  ’ ‘  i was supposed to be captain of the cheerleading team  .  ’ ‘  i can’t get him out of my head  .  ’ ‘  are we going to the prom or to hell  ?  ’ ‘  give me a break  .  ’ ‘  what are you trying to do  ?  kill me  ?  ’ ‘  what are you trying to do  ?  sleep  ?  ’ ‘  suicide is a private thing  .  ’ ‘  you’re giving your life away to become a goddamn statistic in u.s. fucking a today  .  that’s got to be the least private thing i can think of  .  ’ ‘  if everyone jumped off a bridge  ,  young lady  ,  would you  ?  ’ ‘  if you were happy every day of your life  ,  you wouldn’t be a human being  ,  you’d be a game show host  .  ’ ‘  if you were happy every day of your life  ,  you wouldn’t be a human being  .  ’ ‘  let’s knock off early  .  buy some shoes  ,  something lame like that  .  ’ ‘  people love me  !  ’ ‘  color me stoked  ,  girl  !  ’ ‘  people love you but i know you  .  ’ ‘  so some people need different kinds of convincing than others  .  ’ ‘  jealous much  ?  ’ ‘  why can’t you just be a friend  ?  why are you such a megabitch  ?  ’ ‘  why can’t you just be a friend  ?  ’ ‘  why are you such a megabitch  ?  ’ ‘  why are you pulling my dick  ?  ’ ‘  wanna go out tonight  ?  ’ ‘  i knew you’d come back  .  ’ ‘  it’s over  ,  (name)  !  over  !  grow up  !  ’ ‘  i don’t get it  ,  you were wrong  !  i was right  !  ’ ‘  you can’t ever find a place nice  &  peaceful because there isn’t any  .  ’ ‘  get off my bed  ,  you sick psycho  .  ’ ‘  you think you’re a rebel  ,  you’re not a rebel  .  you’re a sick psycho  .  ’ ‘  you think you’re a rebel  ,  you’re not a rebel  .  .  ’ ‘  do you think you’re a rebel  ?  ’ ‘  you say tomayto  ,  say tomahto  .  let’s call the the whole thing off  .  ’ ‘  i usually go for whole sentences myself  ,  but hey this is perfecto  .  ’ ‘  you’re not listening  !  i’m not on your side  .  ’ ‘  this knife is filthy  .  ’ ‘  you don’t get it  ,  do you  ?  ’ ‘  society nods its head at any horror the american teenager can think to bring upon itself  .  ’ ‘  let’s hope she’s rubbing noses with jesus  .  ’ ‘  is this turnout weak or what  ?  ’ ‘  he’s wrong but i’m going to teach him what’s right  .  ’ ‘  i’m going to stop (name) if it’s the last thing i do  .  ’ ‘  i can’t believe you did it  .  i was teasing  .  ’ ‘  sure  ,  i climbed up here to kill you  ,  but first i was going to try  &  get you back  .  ’ ‘  we coulda toasted marshmallows together  .  ’ ‘  hey  ,  why so tense  ?  ’ ‘  sorry tiger  ,  i’m a little busy  .  ’ ‘  get a job  .  ’ ‘  oh my god  ,  another damn pep assembly  .  ’ ‘  may i see your hall pass  ?  ’ ‘  i knew that loose was too noose  !  i mean  ,  noose too loose  !  goddamn you  !  ’ ‘  like father  ,  like son  .  ’ ‘  you didn’t say simon says  .  ’ ‘  live by the sword  . . .  ’ ‘  you think just because you started this thing  ,  you can end it  ?  ’ ‘  you want to wipe the slate clean as much as i do  .  ’ ‘  so maybe i am killing everyone in the school because nobody loves me  .  ’ ‘  you have a purpose though  !  remember  ?  ’ ‘  let’s face it  ,  the only place different social types can genuinely get along with each other is in heaven  .  ’ ‘  there’s a school that self - destructed not because society didn’t care  ,  but because that school was society  .  ’ ‘  is that deep or what  ?  ’ ‘  i’ll let you put it in your diary  ,  babe  .  free of charge  .  ’ ‘  you know what i want  ,  babe  ?  ’ ‘  you know what i want  ,  babe  ?  cool guys like you out of my life  .  ’ ‘  but don’t worry  ,  these here were ich luge bullets  .  ’ ‘  color me impressed  .  ’ ‘  you really fucked me up  ,  (name)  .  ’ ‘  you’ve got power  ,  (name)  .  power i didn’t think you had  .  ’ ‘  the slate is clean  .  ’ ‘  pretend i did blow up the school  ,  all the schools  .  now that you’re dead  ,  what are you gonna do with your life  ?  ’ ‘  (name)  ,  you look like hell  .  ’ ‘  (name)  ,  my love  ,  there’s a new sheriff in town  .  ’ ‘  my date for the prom kind of flaked out on me  ,  so i thought if you weren’t doing anything that night we could go to the video store  &  rent some new releases or something  .  maybe pop some popcorn  .  ’ ‘  my date for the prom kind of flaked out on me  .  ’ ‘  i thought if you weren’t doing anything that night we could go to the video store  &  rent some new releases or something  .  maybe pop some popcorn  .  ’

[darylwillfightnatureforcarol]

Back To The Past Chapter 6

Description: Daryl has a conversation with two people he cares greatly about. 

Back To The Past

Daryl struggled against the bonds holding him trapped against the tree. The ropes had begun to cut into his skin.

He thought back to how he had come to be like this:

“Stop right there!” Shane said authoritatively with his gun up.

Daryl didn’t hesitate to hold his hands in front of him, dropping his bow to the side. He didn’t want to get into it with Shane.

He was a damned psycho.

“Who the hell are you?” the ex-cop questioned.

Daryl sighed. This wasn’t going to go over well.

“Daryl Dixon,” he grunted with some reluctance. He knew they weren’t going to believe him.

Shane frowned and looked him up and down.

“Dixon? You don’t look nothing like him,” Shane assessed, but then he paused, looking Daryl over again. “Actually, maybe a little.”

Daryl huffed and swore under his breath. He should have just made something up and pretended to be some long lost relative of himself.

Too late for that now.

“I’m telling ya man, I’m Daryl Dixon and I know this is gonna sound like a loud of bullshit, but I’m from the future.”

“You expect me to believe that?”

“I don’t expect you to believe shit. But it’s the truth.”

“Man, show me your hands.”

With that said, and with Daryl holding his hands out in front of himself, Shane had produced a pair of handcuffs.

After securing them around Daryl’s wrists, Shane had led him further into camp, past many curious and afraid on-lookers.

At some point after a lot of walking, Shane had swapped the handcuffs out and had coiled a length of rope around him and a tree, keeping his hands down by his side.

So, that’s where he was and where he had been for a few hours now. Shane had yet to question him again, but Daryl knew it wouldn’t be long.

He shifted again, testing the ropes holding him. He wasn’t really trying to escape but the damned thing was uncomfortable.

Besides that, he couldn’t save Sophia or Carol like this.

Daryl continued to stretch his hands, trying to get the rope to give a little.

He stopped when he felt eyes on him. He turned to look and came face to face with a girl long since dead.

Sophia.

“You saved my mom, didn’t you?” she asked in a timid voice.

“It weren’t nothing,” he answered feeling stumped by the sight of her. He knew he must be gaping at her. He couldn’t stop the feeling of guilt that gripped him. He had failed to save this little girl.

“Why?”

“What do you mean, why?” he asked her instead.

“None of the others do. They just pretend it doesn’t happen,” Sophia explained, looking down.

Daryl scoffed. He remembers this.

No one in the camp acknowledged the abuse going on in front of their faces.

Even he, back then, had wanted to step in but only didn’t because Merle said it would make things worse. Back then he always listened to Merle. A stupid thing to do, in hindsight.

“Yeah, I know. Bunch of damn hypocrites, the lot of ‘em,” Daryl spat and then he cleared his throat, “I helped your mom because she shouldn’t have to go through that. She deserves better.”

Sophia’s eyes brightened and she smiled a little.

“Thank you.”

“’Course,” Daryl choked out, feeling oddly emotional.

“Sophia!” came a stern but panicked voice.

Daryl groaned inwardly.

That was someone he had not missed at all. He knew it was disrespectful to think badly of a dead woman, but Lori Grimes just pissed him off. She always had.

The thin brunette came marching over and grabbed Sophia’s arm.

“You stay away from him, okay, sweetheart?” Lori chided the girl.

Sophia frowned at her.

“But he saved my mom!” she protested as she was tugged away.

Sophia turned back to look at him over her shoulder and she gave him a shy smile.

He nodded back at her in acknowledgment.

He would save her this time.

--

It was much later when a, still, confused looking Shane approached. The man rubbed a hand over his head, as was customary for him.

“Okay, let me get this straight. You’re from the future. You’re the same Daryl Dixon we know, that lives here in this camp?” Shane recounted with a dubious tone.

“That’s right,” Daryl said in a tired voice.

“Can you prove it?” Shane offered, looking him over with the same scepticism.

“Prove it, how?” Daryl huffed. A round of twenty questions wasn’t going to solve this mess. None of them knew him back then.

That was how he had wanted it. He had not cared one bit to get to know these people. The only reason he had stayed with them at all was because of the safety that could be found in numbers. Not to mention Merle’s dumbass plan to rob the unsuspecting group.

“I don’t know man. The way I see it, the only options we got is to wait until Daryl gets back from his hunt,” Shane suggested with a frown.

Daryl sighed in frustration. That could be a long time to wait.

Sometimes his hunts could last for weeks if he didn’t have any luck. Especially since he remembered being extra determined to bring something back. Despite his front of not caring, he had wanted to provide food for the kids so they wouldn’t starve.

“Fine,” he said, because there didn’t seem to be any other option.

Shane nodded and walked off again.

It was going to do wonders for his back to fall asleep like this, he celebrated bitterly.

Worse still, was when the scent of food began wafting through the camp. His stomach growled against his will.

He watched the camp dwellers pass by him every so often with plates full of food. They didn’t bother hiding their pointed stares. They looked terrified of him.

He resolved to look ahead of himself, to block out the sight of the passers with their plates. If he didn’t see it, he didn’t need it. He’d gone longer without food.

He had just grown used to the ease that the communities provided. There were times when he didn’t need to hunt anymore to get his food. A lot of the time, he mainly went because he wanted to. There was barely a necessity for it anymore.

He almost didn’t notice the footsteps approaching him, so intent on distracting himself was he. He looked up, seeing Carol standing there with a plate.

“Hi,” she muttered awkwardly, as she shifted from one foot to the other.

“Hey,” he replied, staring at her in surprise. He hadn’t expected to see her again, at least not this soon.

“I figured Shane probably didn’t give you anything, so, I made you a plate,” she explained with an unsure expression.

“Uh, thanks,” he said in as kind a tone as he was able. He knew he could be off putting at times, so he didn’t want to give her a reason to be afraid.

Carol smiled shyly at him, looking a little surer in herself. She sat herself down in front of him, leaving a small gap between them.

“It’s no problem. I figured I owed you one anyway.”

Daryl immediately shook his head.

“Nah, you don’t owe me nothing.”

Carol looked at him for a beat before she looked back to the plate in her hands.

“Anyway, I know it’s not going to leave you with much dignity, but I can help you eat, if you like,” she offered with a pink tinge to her cheeks.

Daryl scoffed with a small chuckle.

“What dignity?”

She let out a tiny giggle of her own before quickly stopping. She looked around, as if checking if she was seen. Which reminded him.

“Why’d you stop me?” he asked out of nowhere.

Carol blinked at him in confusion. It took another few seconds before understanding filled her gaze. She looked down at her hands.

“Because if I don’t have him, I have no one. We have no one. Me and my daughter.”

Daryl’s heart clenched. She really believed that.

“I know it ain’t gonna make sense to ya, but, you would have me,” Daryl vowed in a strong voice.

Carol watched him, her eyes trailing over his face. Something in her gaze softened.

“I overheard your talk with Shane. Are you really Daryl?” she asked with some doubt in her eyes.

“Yeah, I am,” he answered after chewing his lip.

She seemed to think this over for a moment before she nodded. When she looked at him again, there was confusion in her gaze.

“Why do you care about what happens to me?” she asked in an emotional voice.

He was taken off guard by the question and he gaped at her for a moment before clearing his throat.

“Because you’re my best friend. In the future were friends.”

Carol looked shocked by his words. He couldn’t tell if it was a good shock or a bad one.

“Best friend? Why?” she asked this time, appearing baffled.

Daryl frowned.

Why?

Why was she his best friend?

“What do you mean, why?” he asked her, reminding him of the conversation he had with her daughter.

“Why would you want me as your best friend?” she elaborated, insecurity raw in her voice.

Daryl didn’t hesitate in his answer.

“Because you’re the strongest person I know, and because you never gave up on me. Wouldn’t let me pull away when I tried.”

“That doesn’t sound like me at all,” she proclaimed with a sceptical look.

“You’ll get there,” he promised, thinking once again of the strong, fiery woman she becomes.

She didn’t respond but she watched him, as if searching for a lie.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” came an authoritative voice from their left.

They both looked up to see Shane standing there, looking incredulous.

Carol scrambled to her feet and wrung her hands. Her eyes were lowered to the ground.

“I was just…” she mumbled, trailing off.

Shane shook his head and placed a hand on her shoulder.

Daryl glared at his hand.

“You can’t be around him, Carol. We don’t know who he is, and we don’t know how dangerous he is yet,” instructed, speaking to her like a child.

Carol nodded, looking thoroughly berated.

“I’m sorry…” she said in a quiet voice, not meeting Shane’s eyes.

He caught sight of her action immediately when she shifted her shoulder, that Shane still held. She didn’t want him touching her.

“Let her go!” he barked at Shane, making him snap his attention to Daryl, still captive against the tree.

“Why don’t you just shut up, and mind your business?” Shane retorted back at him with an indignant frown.

Daryl’s glare intensified. Was everyone just wildly less observant than him.

“Why don’t you stop putting your hands on someone who clearly don’t wanna be touched?” Daryl spat back, making Shane flinch.

Shane looked at Carol, almost reluctantly, and noticing her uncomfortable posture, removed his hand from her shoulder.

“Sorry,” Shane muttered as he wiped his hands off on his pants, looking embarrassed.

“It’s okay,” Carol replied, reaching up to rub her shoulder unconsciously.

She looked back at Daryl and there was a silent gratitude in her eyes.

Daryl gave her a brief nod in return.

He didn’t understand how it seemed like he was the only one to notice anything about Carol.

It was like they had an idealised version of her concocted in their heads. They didn’t pick up on all the nuances that made her up. That seemed like a crime to him.

It was the same years ago, when she had been spiralling.

Rick never saw it. He just assumed she had grown cold, consumed by violence. Had sent her away in a feeble attempt to protect his children from destruction.

Daryl had seen the truth of it. She was tormented by the beliefs she held close to her from the old world.

She was someone who had believed deeply in the idea of God, and heaven, and the afterlife. Now she had found herself as someone who killed people, sometimes daily. The overwhelming power of it had threatened to crush her.

It had taken even Daryl far too long to realise what was going on. This was due to how adamant she became in pushing him away. It made sense. If he had known what she was going through, he would have tried to help her. But she didn’t want to be helped. Part of her wanted the flames she was fighting off to consume her, in the same way she explained to him in the women’s shelter in Atlanta.

As he watched her walk off with Shane, Daryl hoped he would be able to change the events that led to her downfall.

She deserved to be happy.

[artificialqueens]

Bad Girls Club (Branjie) Chapter 6 - Joley

ao3 link

[June 6th, 2018]

“Tradition or not, this shit gonna get our asses busted one of these days, and I don’t know about y’all, but I’m trynna haul ass outta this zip code as soon as I can.”

“God, who invited Captain Buzzkill?” Vanessa rolled her eyes. “You as fucked up as we are, Silk. So, shut up and grab a box.” She passed a box of snap poppers to Silky and A’keria and kept one for herself. Glancing over her shoulder, she opened hers up and took one of the small, wrapped spheres between her thumb and finger. “On three.”

In stage whispers, the three girls counted down from three before throwing the little balls at the stairs of their high school, giggling as the loud snaps filled the otherwise quiet night – well, quiet for that part of town, anyway. Despite the complaints, it was still one of their most cherished traditions, dating back to eighth grade when they set off the poppers at their middle school the night after the last day, ringing in the start of the summer.

The girls were so caught up in their celebration that they failed to notice the police officer walking up behind them until he cleared his throat to get their attention.

“Seriously, you guys?” He pinched the bridge of his nose as the three teenagers scrambled upright in a haphazard (and fruitless) attempt to save face. “Alright, you know the drill. Davenport, Ganache, Mateo, into the car.” And they were left with no option but to comply.

While the process was always the same, the outcome varied based on multiple factors – the type of crime, the time of day, whether or not Officer Watts was fighting with his wife – but everything was added to the books, so to speak. Tonight, it just seemed like he couldn’t be bothered to do more than go through the motions, bringing each girl home and walking them to the door, so their guardians knew just where they’d been.

Vanessa was the last stop and the officer dropped her off to her mom with the repeated normalcy as any sort of scheduled custody exchange. “Say hi to Kimberly and the kids for me!” she called out as Officer Watts returned to his patrol car.

“Don’t try to buddy your way out of this, Vanessa. I’m getting real tired of this bullshit.” Her mother’s tone was as sharp as her glare, punctuated by the sound of the door slamming shut. “I see that police car come down this block more often than the ice cream truck! It’s like you’re not even trying to better yourself.”

“Better myself?” Vanessa scoffed and rolled her eyes. “What is this, My Fair Lady?” She calmed herself as quickly as she had snapped. “Sorry, sorry… but I promise we ain’t done nothing wrong, just hanging out.”

“Hanging out doesn’t get you brought home in a cop car. Don’t you ever stop and think about your future? How you gonna apply to college with a permanent record like that?”

The sudden silence that followed filled the room with a solemn sense of unease. Vanessa sat down on her couch and picked her dog up onto her lap. “Can we stop pretending I got a chance of going to college, Mom? We both know I’m not cut out for that.”

Her mother’s expression softened as she sat beside her on the couch. “Mija, I wish you could see the potential in yourself that I see in you.” She wrapped her arm around her and held her close. “You are not a lost cause, and I’m not giving up on you.”

[Present Day]

“Do you think prison’s actually like Orange is the New Black?” Vanessa asked, her gaze drifting from A’keria to the grass beneath her, ripping a handful of it from the ground and aimlessly scattering the blades.

A’keria quirked her brow. “Why you worried about it? The whole point of this shit is us getting clean records, so we don’t go to prison.” After a moment, she sighed and rolled her eyes. “Is this about the whole prison wife thing you think Brooke Lynn was talking about?”

Vanessa looked away as she answered. “No…” She chewed on her lip. “Not just her. You really think this shit is gonna stick? That we’re gonna go to college and get on the dean’s list or some shit? This whole thing is just so they can pass the blame onto us when we fuck up and land in jail for real.” As she finished her rant, she noticed the expression on her friend’s face. It wasn’t quite anger or sadness, but it made her chest tighten. “What?”

“I just didn’t think you, of all people, would give up on yourself.”

“I’m not!” she quickly defended. “I’m just being realistic.”

A’keria turned and cornered her into eye contact. “Are you? Or are you setting yourself up for failure on purpose, so you don’t have to get out of your comfort zone?”

Vanessa huffed and crossed her arms. “Since when are you into psycho-ana…psych-analy-a…” She gestured vaguely. “You know, dissecting my brain and shit.”

“It don’t take fuckin’ Einstein to know you’re being ridiculous. Look, I’m not saying I’m not gonna drink or smoke or do hoodrat shit after this, but we got a chance at actually having futures. And if you’re gonna sit and act like none of this ever happened when we get back home, you’re a hugehypocrite for being mad at Brooke Lynn for wanting to go back to the good life she had.”

It was rare for Vanessa to be at a loss for words, but she had no way to argue what had been said. It would be a conscious choice to go back home and get in trouble again, and she would be disappointing everyone that cared about her. So, maybe she couldn’t fault Brooke for longing to escape from this situation, but it didn’t resolve how she felt about her or even in general. She lay down on the ground and stared off into space while the sun warmed her skin. “I don’t know what to say to her.”

She nodded slowly. “I knew it would come back to that. You give so much of your heart so easily, Vanjie. You set yourself up to get hurt. Hell, you might still have a shot with her if you actually stop and think about what you say instead of shooting off at the mouth.”

Vanessa pushed herself back up, shaking her head. “Nah, not with how I’ve been. She probably thinks I’m psycho now.”

A’keria shifted to her side to properly look at her. “You won’t know if you don’t talk it out. Just… Don’t slip back into your old habits.”

“What old habits?”

“Really, bitch?”

[September 3rd, 2018]

“Okay, the suspense is killing me, so I’ll bite. What the hell is wrong with Vanjie?”

Silky rolled her eyes before looking in Vanessa’s direction. Their friend was sat at the other end of the lunch table, pouting with her arms crossed, but also looking sincerely solemn and crestfallen. “Oh, that girl she been hooking up with all summer dropped her ass ‘cause she has a boyfriend.”

A’keria let out an exaggerated groan. “I told her. Didn’t I tell her? I said, ‘watch yourself with her, she ain’t in it for the long haul,’ right to her.” She sighed and shook her head, deciding to save the well-earned ‘I told you so’ for later. For now, she needed to be a comforting friend. “Alright, c’mere baby. It’s gonna be okay,” she soothed and wrapped an arm around her.

“She got me fucked up, man,” Vanessa’s voice trembled as she spoke. “She really went and said she ‘never felt like this before’ and now she’s gonna act like I don’t exist. Who does that shit?”

“Straight girls,” Silky chimed in, which got a small laugh out of Vanessa – much to both of her friends’ relief.

With the tension lifted – at least for the moment – Vanessa pushed herself up to her feet. “I’m not gonna stay stressing over this, okay? I’m good, fuck her and her greasy-ass boyfriend.” And with that, the school bell rang, and they were all off to class.

Silky walked with A’keria, trailing a few steps behind Vanessa. “Do you actually think she’s done stressing over this?”

“Not a chance.”

Much to their chagrin, A’keria ended up being proven right not a full three days later.

All it took was one house party with just enough alcohol and Vanessa was making out with her summer fling off in a corner. She had one hand up the back of the girl’s shirt, the other tangled through her hair – it was as if nothing had changed at all.

Until it did, ten minutes later.

“Where are you going?” Vanessa asked, not about to be left high and dry without putting up a fight. “It was just getting good,” she added with a discontented huff.

“My boyfriend’s here,” the ex answered in a calloused tone, reapplying her lipstick without looking in Vanessa’s direction. She fluffed up her hair and sauntered off, wrapping her arms around some lanky, awkward looking guy and effectively acting as though Vanessa ceased to exist.

A’keria got up to collect her friend. “This time I’m not holding back the ‘I told you so.’”

[Present Day]

“Are you still giving me the cold shoulder?”

Vanessa shrugged it off. “There’s a lot worse I could be giving you. Don’t push it.”

Brooke Lynn sighed and pushed herself to sit up on her bed. “Baby, I can’t fix anything if you don’t tell me what’s wrong.” She pouted and reached out to grab Vanessa’s hand, swinging it slowly.

This wasn’t fair as far as Vanessa was concerned. How was she supposed to maintain her tough resolve when Brooke was giving her puppy dog eyes and a soft, pink pout? Her weakness was being used against her – it had been at least two days of freezing her out and she had been starting to get lonely anyway. She bit down on her lip and looked down. “I’m not trynna have this heart-to-heart yet. I know you ain’t about it, so the time has to be right.”

“Then let’s not talk.” Brooke noticed Vanessa wasn’t resisting her hold anymore, so she pulled her closer and closer until the smaller girl sat on her lap. “We don’t have to talk, just let me take your mind off it for a while,” she cooed as she started to place soft, slow kisses from her shoulder all the way up to her jaw.

The temptation was undeniable and nearly every part of Vanessa’s body was urging her towards Brooke. And at first, she gave in. She straddled her lap with her arms draped around her neck. Their foreheads rested against each other, lips just barely touching before connecting in a kiss. And another one, a deeper, languid one. For a moment, she was perfectly at ease. There was no yesterday or tomorrow to weigh down her mind – there was only now and only them in a dream of their own design.

Then she woke up to the sinking feeling that this was too easy. Not every problem could be solved by kissing pretty girls, no matter how hard she may try. She pulled away, standing up. “I can’t do this right now. It ain’t even you… I just…”

“You just what?”

Vanessa was shaking her head as she backed away. “You wouldn’t understand. Sometimes it’s better to not do enough than to do too much. That’s how you end up in this shit hole.”

[June 24th, 2019]

It was the dead of night, a time where – in many places – everything would be quiet and calm. But this was still Los Angeles in the early days of summer, when the weather was nice without the balmy heat making the air hazy, the kind of heat that made walking feel like trudging through a thick slime.

The ability to walk quickly and move nimbly was imperative for Vanessa and A’keria – down one from their usual trio with Silky away visiting family in Mississippi. It would’ve taken a lot more than that to quash Vanessa’s plans.

“You have got to be fucking kidding me. I swear to god, if the police don’t kill you, I will. It’s like you’re trying to invent a new level of stupid shit to try to get away with and—”

“Shh!” Vanessa elbowed her in the ribs. “We’ll get away with it if you shut the fuck up.” And with that, she had effectively tuned A’keria out as they kept walking to their destination. “Alright, this is it.”

A’keria hesitated. “You sure? Cause if it ain’t—”

“It is. Now, do you want the eggs or toilet paper?” She held up a carton of eggs in one hand and a roll of toilet paper in the other, offering up both options.

After a moment of disgruntled hesitation, A’keria sighed and grabbed the toilet paper. If Vanessa wasn’t going to come to her senses, she would at least pick the lesser of two evils on her end.

Of course, when the police arrived it didn’t really matter who was throwing what – vandalism was still vandalism. But Vanessa sat upright and indignant as she was escorted into the backseat of the cop car. Just as the car was pulling away, she stole a glance out the window, at the girl who had ignited the anger in her that drove her to revenge.

She looked indifferent ��� mildly annoyed at most. This infuriated Vanessa to no end. “Look at her, she don’t even care. What the fuck?”

The other girl sighed with her head against the window. “Now do you see how ridiculous you’ve been? You got your ass all worked up over some bitch that don’t give two shits about you. I keep telling you it’s gonna land you in a damn mess and look where we are now. We could catch a real charge for this, V.” She took a deep breath, willing herself to calm down. There was no point in them fighting on top of everything else. “Just once I wish you’d think things through before you act, channel that passion into something useful.”

“I’m sorry,” she mumbled. “Listen, I’ll take the whole rap for this. It was my fault – you tried to talk me out of it.”

A’keria shook her head with a soft smile. “Nah, they caught me red-handed too. Besides, we’re still ride-or-dies no matter how foolish you act.”

[Present Day]

“Hey… Vanessa, right? Do you mind if I ask you a question?”

Vanessa was undeniably caught off-guard when the hot, tattooed blonde that’d served her lunch plopped herself down beside her at the table. She blinked, taking a moment for her brain to connect to her mouth. “Um… Sure, what’s up?”

“You see that girl over there? With the blonde ponytail and the kicked puppy expression?” Kameron cocked her head in Brooke Lynn’s direction. “Every time I look at her, she’s looking at you. And I mean looking at you. So, I have got to know – is something going on between you two?”

That was the million-dollar question, wasn’t it? Vanessa looked down at the table for a good few moments before facing the girl who didn’t seem annoyed or jealous – just genuinely curious, which she supposed alleviated some of the anxiety the question could’ve caused. “You could say that,” was what she decided on. “But it’s complicated, you don’t want the whole backstory or nothing.”

Kameron chuckled, tucking her hair behind her ear. “Listen, I know complicated. And I know Brooke Lynn. I promise, nothing you could say about her would surprise me.”

It certainly wasn’t the response Vanessa was expecting, but it did explain the nonchalance Kameron had. “It’s not even her. I mean… it’s kind of her. But it’s me too. I got a… bad habit of getting real intense if I start to catch feelings, and she’s got this whole life to go back to, and I shouldn’t be mad at her for wanting to go back to her normal life…”

“So, what, she told you to fuck off back into the hood?”

Vanessa laughed, but it was a laugh filled with embarrassment and a hint of self-realization. “No… I just been avoiding talking to her about it since I’m, you know, real and emotional and shit, and she’s all closed off cause she’s a hornet.”

“Do you mean WASP?”

“Like it matters. It’s like we’re speaking different languages half the time anyway.”

Kameron tilted her head and pressed her lips together, going absolutely silent. In actuality, it wasn’t more than a minute or so, but with Vanessa unconsciously holding her breath, it felt like ages. “What if I go talk to her for you? You know, serve as a middleman or something.”

“Oh, no that’s not a— oh, okay, you already going. You ain’t even listening to me.” She hid her head in her arms on the table. “Well fuck me, I guess.” It wasn’t like the situation could get any more awkward, she figured.

Meanwhile, Kameron seemed as cheerful as she had been while serving food when she perched herself across from Brooke Lynn at the otherwise empty lunch table. “Long time no see, huh?”

[missjanjie]

Branjie Fic | Bad Girls Club (6/?)

Title: Bad Girls Club Summary:  Los Angeles’ new program, the Juvenile Female Rehabilitation Program (JFRP) was created with the purpose of taking at-risk girls in the county and send them to a summer-long program located where a sleepaway camp once stood. There, they will take classes in ethics, behavior, and other courses to help mold these young minds. Brooke Lynn and Vanessa have been sent there for wildly different reasons, but with the same result - a clean permanent record. Being roomed together, the pair might find an unlikely alliance (and maybe more) in each other. Word Count: ~2.9k (this chapter)/~16.1k (total) Relationship: Branjie (Brooke Lynn Hytes/Vanessa Vanjie Mateo) Rating: E

Read on AO3

[June 6th, 2018]

“Tradition or not, this shit gonna get our asses busted one of these days, and I don’t know about y’all, but I’m trynna haul ass outta this zip code as soon as I can.”

“God, who invited Captain Buzzkill?” Vanessa rolled her eyes. “You as fucked up as we are, Silk. So, shut up and grab a box.” She passed a box of snap poppers to Silky and A’keria and kept one for herself. Glancing over her shoulder, she opened hers up and took one of the small, wrapped spheres between her thumb and finger. “On three.”

In stage whispers, the three girls counted down from three before throwing the little balls at the stairs of their high school, giggling as the loud snaps filled the otherwise quiet night – well, quiet for that part of town, anyway. Despite the complaints, it was still one of their most cherished traditions, dating back to eighth grade when they set off the poppers at their middle school the night after the last day, ringing in the start of the summer.

The girls were so caught up in their celebration that they failed to notice the police officer walking up behind them until he cleared his throat to get their attention.

“Seriously, you guys?” He pinched the bridge of his nose as the three teenagers scrambled upright in a haphazard (and fruitless) attempt to save face. “Alright, you know the drill. Davenport, Ganache, Mateo, into the car.” And they were left with no option but to comply.

While the process was always the same, the outcome varied based on multiple factors – the type of crime, the time of day, whether or not Officer Watts was fighting with his wife – but everything was added to the books, so to speak. Tonight, it just seemed like he couldn’t be bothered to do more than go through the motions, bringing each girl home and walking them to the door, so their guardians knew just where they’d been.

Vanessa was the last stop and the officer dropped her off to her mom with the repeated normalcy as any sort of scheduled custody exchange. “Say hi to Kimberly and the kids for me!” she called out as Officer Watts returned to his patrol car.

“Don’t try to buddy your way out of this, Vanessa. I’m getting real tired of this bullshit.” Her mother’s tone was as sharp as her glare, punctuated by the sound of the door slamming shut. “I see that police car come down this block more often than the ice cream truck! It’s like you’re not even trying to better yourself.”

“Better myself?” Vanessa scoffed and rolled her eyes. “What is this, My Fair Lady?” She calmed herself as quickly as she had snapped. “Sorry, sorry… but I promise we ain’t done nothing wrong, just hanging out.”

“Hanging out doesn’t get you brought home in a cop car. Don’t you ever stop and think about your future? How you gonna apply to college with a permanent record like that?”

The sudden silence that followed filled the room with a solemn sense of unease. Vanessa sat down on her couch and picked her dog up onto her lap. “Can we stop pretending I got a chance of going to college, Mom? We both know I’m not cut out for that.”

Her mother’s expression softened as she sat beside her on the couch. “Mija, I wish you could see the potential in yourself that I see in you.” She wrapped her arm around her and held her close. “You are not a lost cause, and I’m not giving up on you.”

[Present Day]

“Do you think prison’s actually like Orange is the New Black?” Vanessa asked, her gaze drifting from A’keria to the grass beneath her, ripping a handful of it from the ground and aimlessly scattering the blades.

A’keria quirked her brow. “Why you worried about it? The whole point of this shit is us getting clean records, so we don’t go to prison.” After a moment, she sighed and rolled her eyes. “Is this about the whole prison wife thing you think Brooke Lynn was talking about?”

Vanessa looked away as she answered. “No…” She chewed on her lip. “Not just her. You really think this shit is gonna stick? That we’re gonna go to college and get on the dean’s list or some shit? This whole thing is just so they can pass the blame onto us when we fuck up and land in jail for real.” As she finished her rant, she noticed the expression on her friend’s face. It wasn’t quite anger or sadness, but it made her chest tighten. “What?”

“I just didn’t think you, of all people, would give up on yourself.”

“I’m not!” she quickly defended. “I’m just being realistic.”

A’keria turned and cornered her into eye contact. “Are you? Or are you setting yourself up for failure on purpose, so you don’t have to get out of your comfort zone?”

Vanessa huffed and crossed her arms. “Since when are you into psycho-ana…psych-analy-a…” She gestured vaguely. “You know, dissecting my brain and shit.”

“It don’t take fuckin’ Einstein to know you’re being ridiculous. Look, I’m not saying I’m not gonna drink or smoke or do hoodrat shit after this, but we got a chance at actually having futures. And if you’re gonna sit and act like none of this ever happened when we get back home, you’re a hugehypocrite for being mad at Brooke Lynn for wanting to go back to the good life she had.”

It was rare for Vanessa to be at a loss for words, but she had no way to argue what had been said. It would be a conscious choice to go back home and get in trouble again, and she would be disappointing everyone that cared about her. So, maybe she couldn’t fault Brooke for longing to escape from this situation, but it didn’t resolve how she felt about her or even in general. She lay down on the ground and stared off into space while the sun warmed her skin. “I don’t know what to say to her.”

She nodded slowly. “I knew it would come back to that. You give so much of your heart so easily, Vanjie. You set yourself up to get hurt. Hell, you might still have a shot with her if you actually stop and think about what you say instead of shooting off at the mouth.”

Vanessa pushed herself back up, shaking her head. “Nah, not with how I’ve been. She probably thinks I’m psycho now.”

A’keria shifted to her side to properly look at her. “You won’t know if you don’t talk it out. Just… Don’t slip back into your old habits.”

“What old habits?”

“Really, bitch?”

[September 3rd, 2018]

“Okay, the suspense is killing me, so I’ll bite. What the hell is wrong with Vanjie?”

Silky rolled her eyes before looking in Vanessa’s direction. Their friend was sat at the other end of the lunch table, pouting with her arms crossed, but also looking sincerely solemn and crestfallen. “Oh, that girl she been hooking up with all summer dropped her ass ‘cause she has a boyfriend.”

A’keria let out an exaggerated groan. “I told her. Didn’t I tell her? I said, ‘watch yourself with her, she ain’t in it for the long haul,’ right to her.” She sighed and shook her head, deciding to save the well-earned ‘I told you so’ for later. For now, she needed to be a comforting friend. “Alright, c’mere baby. It’s gonna be okay,” she soothed and wrapped an arm around her.

“She got me fucked up, man,” Vanessa’s voice trembled as she spoke. “She really went and said she ‘never felt like this before’ and now she’s gonna act like I don’t exist. Who does that shit?”

“Straight girls,” Silky chimed in, which got a small laugh out of Vanessa – much to both of her friends’ relief.

With the tension lifted – at least for the moment – Vanessa pushed herself up to her feet. “I’m not gonna stay stressing over this, okay? I’m good, fuck her and her greasy-ass boyfriend.” And with that, the school bell rang, and they were all off to class.

Silky walked with A’keria, trailing a few steps behind Vanessa. “Do you actually think she’s done stressing over this?”

“Not a chance.”

Much to their chagrin, A’keria ended up being proven right not a full three days later.

All it took was one house party with just enough alcohol and Vanessa was making out with her summer fling off in a corner. She had one hand up the back of the girl’s shirt, the other tangled through her hair – it was as if nothing had changed at all.

Until it did, ten minutes later.

“Where are you going?” Vanessa asked, not about to be left high and dry without putting up a fight. “It was just getting good,” she added with a discontented huff.

“My boyfriend’s here,” the ex answered in a calloused tone, reapplying her lipstick without looking in Vanessa’s direction. She fluffed up her hair and sauntered off, wrapping her arms around some lanky, awkward looking guy and effectively acting as though Vanessa ceased to exist.

A’keria got up to collect her friend. “This time I’m not holding back the ‘I told you so.’”

[Present Day]

“Are you still giving me the cold shoulder?”

Vanessa shrugged it off. “There’s a lot worse I could be giving you. Don’t push it.”

Brooke Lynn sighed and pushed herself to sit up on her bed. “Baby, I can’t fix anything if you don’t tell me what’s wrong.” She pouted and reached out to grab Vanessa’s hand, swinging it slowly.

This wasn’t fair as far as Vanessa was concerned. How was she supposed to maintain her tough resolve when Brooke was giving her puppy dog eyes and a soft, pink pout? Her weakness was being used against her – it had been at least two days of freezing her out and she had been starting to get lonely anyway. She bit down on her lip and looked down. “I’m not trynna have this heart-to-heart yet. I know you ain’t about it, so the time has to be right.”

“Then let’s not talk.” Brooke noticed Vanessa wasn’t resisting her hold anymore, so she pulled her closer and closer until the smaller girl sat on her lap. “We don’t have to talk, just let me take your mind off it for a while,” she cooed as she started to place soft, slow kisses from her shoulder all the way up to her jaw.

The temptation was undeniable and nearly every part of Vanessa’s body was urging her towards Brooke. And at first, she gave in. She straddled her lap with her arms draped around her neck. Their foreheads rested against each other, lips just barely touching before connecting in a kiss. And another one, a deeper, languid one. For a moment, she was perfectly at ease. There was no yesterday or tomorrow to weigh down her mind – there was only now and only them in a dream of their own design.

Then she woke up to the sinking feeling that this was too easy. Not every problem could be solved by kissing pretty girls, no matter how hard she may try. She pulled away, standing up. “I can’t do this right now. It ain’t even you… I just…”

“You just what?”

Vanessa was shaking her head as she backed away. “You wouldn’t understand. Sometimes it’s better to not do enough than to do too much. That’s how you end up in this shit hole.”

[June 24th, 2019]

It was the dead of night, a time where – in many places – everything would be quiet and calm. But this was still Los Angeles in the early days of summer, when the weather was nice without the balmy heat making the air hazy, the kind of heat that made walking feel like trudging through a thick slime.

The ability to walk quickly and move nimbly was imperative for Vanessa and A’keria – down one from their usual trio with Silky away visiting family in Mississippi. It would’ve taken a lot more than that to quash Vanessa’s plans.

“You have got to be fucking kidding me. I swear to god, if the police don’t kill you, I will. It’s like you’re trying to invent a new level of stupid shit to try to get away with and—”

“Shh!” Vanessa elbowed her in the ribs. “We’ll get away with it if you shut the fuck up.” And with that, she had effectively tuned A’keria out as they kept walking to their destination. “Alright, this is it.”

A’keria hesitated. “You sure? Cause if it ain’t—”

“It is. Now, do you want the eggs or toilet paper?” She held up a carton of eggs in one hand and a roll of toilet paper in the other, offering up both options.

After a moment of disgruntled hesitation, A’keria sighed and grabbed the toilet paper. If Vanessa wasn’t going to come to her senses, she would at least pick the lesser of two evils on her end.

Of course, when the police arrived it didn’t really matter who was throwing what – vandalism was still vandalism. But Vanessa sat upright and indignant as she was escorted into the backseat of the cop car. Just as the car was pulling away, she stole a glance out the window, at the girl who had ignited the anger in her that drove her to revenge.

She looked indifferent – mildly annoyed at most. This infuriated Vanessa to no end. “Look at her, she don’t even care. What the fuck?”

The other girl sighed with her head against the window. “Now do you see how ridiculous you’ve been? You got your ass all worked up over some bitch that don’t give two shits about you. I keep telling you it’s gonna land you in a damn mess and look where we are now. We could catch a real charge for this, V.” She took a deep breath, willing herself to calm down. There was no point in them fighting on top of everything else. “Just once I wish you’d think things through before you act, channel that passion into something useful.”

“I’m sorry,” she mumbled. “Listen, I’ll take the whole rap for this. It was my fault – you tried to talk me out of it.”

A’keria shook her head with a soft smile. “Nah, they caught me red-handed too. Besides, we’re still ride-or-dies no matter how foolish you act.”

[Present Day]

“Hey… Vanessa, right? Do you mind if I ask you a question?”

Vanessa was undeniably caught off-guard when the hot, tattooed blonde that’d served her lunch plopped herself down beside her at the table. She blinked, taking a moment for her brain to connect to her mouth. “Um… Sure, what’s up?”

“You see that girl over there? With the blonde ponytail and the kicked puppy expression?” Kameron cocked her head in Brooke Lynn’s direction. “Every time I look at her, she’s looking at you. And I mean looking at you. So, I have got to know – is something going on between you two?”

That was the million-dollar question, wasn’t it? Vanessa looked down at the table for a good few moments before facing the girl who didn’t seem annoyed or jealous – just genuinely curious, which she supposed alleviated some of the anxiety the question could’ve caused. “You could say that,” was what she decided on. “But it’s complicated, you don’t want the whole backstory or nothing.”

Kameron chuckled, tucking her hair behind her ear. “Listen, I know complicated. And I know Brooke Lynn. I promise, nothing you could say about her would surprise me.”

It certainly wasn’t the response Vanessa was expecting, but it did explain the nonchalance Kameron had. “It’s not even her. I mean… it’s kind of her. But it’s me too. I got a… bad habit of getting real intense if I start to catch feelings, and she’s got this whole life to go back to, and I shouldn’t be mad at her for wanting to go back to her normal life…”

“So, what, she told you to fuck off back into the hood?”

Vanessa laughed, but it was a laugh filled with embarrassment and a hint of self-realization. “No… I just been avoiding talking to her about it since I’m, you know, real and emotional and shit, and she’s all closed off cause she’s a hornet.”

“Do you mean WASP?”

“Like it matters. It’s like we’re speaking different languages half the time anyway.”

Kameron tilted her head and pressed her lips together, going absolutely silent. In actuality, it wasn’t more than a minute or so, but with Vanessa unconsciously holding her breath, it felt like ages. “What if I go talk to her for you? You know, serve as a middleman or something.”

“Oh, no that’s not a— oh, okay, you already going. You ain’t even listening to me.” She hid her head in her arms on the table. “Well fuck me, I guess.” It wasn’t like the situation could get any more awkward, she figured.

Meanwhile, Kameron seemed as cheerful as she had been while serving food when she perched herself across from Brooke Lynn at the otherwise empty lunch table. “Long time no see, huh?”

[whiskehorange]

Michael Myers: Chapters 1-3

I would like to first give a few thanks to people who I do feel deserve it, especially people who have helped me, and I greatly appreciate it ❤️

@countesssandman for reading my first bit and pushing me to post more of my work (this one’s for you!)! 

@wronggwayy I luv u bb gorilla

@namelesshippiearts for also pushing me to write more and get out there 

& @tinalbion for liking a lot of my work and just being so damn nice

Anyways, here we go! My personal favorite of who I’ve written for!

How You Met/Left

You and Michael had one thing in common; you were quiet. Well, you were quiet, not so much anymore. Now you were loud, only because you wanted to make people laugh.

Just simply watching people was what you preferred to do, but thats all you could do when you were first at Smith’s Grove Sanitarium.

~~~

You remembered going there when you were extremely young to meet your mother when your father would bring you at least once a month. At that point, you didn't understand your limits of where you could and couldn't go. A mistake on the Staff’s behalf for not paying attention or giving the slightest damn about who went where whenever.

You had managed to stray away from your father at one point during the normally 45 minutes to an hour visit. Each hall was the same in color and distance, making it easy to find yourself lost.

Coming to the end of a narrow beige and hideous, yellow corridor you looked into an office with a somewhat older gentleman with two taller men you can now safely assume were bodyguards. A boy maybe a few years older than you, not by much was sat at the table; handcuffed. The older man was mainly asking questions only to not receive a mere glance from the boy.

Being the shy and curious one you were that young, you hid slightly behind the door before the halls rang out with a heavy squeak from the door as you bumped into it. Everyone looked up, except for the boy that is.

“Loomis…?” One body guard called out as they stared at you. Before the guards could scoop you up and return you to wherever the hell you had come from, Loomis stopped them.

“Wait, gentlemen,” Loomis held out his hand.

“Now Loomis I don't think we should do this-” One guard exclaimed, his eyes narrowed sharply on Loomis. “Hush now and bring her here. Hello little one. Now what might you be doing so far down these halls?” Loomis kneeled down to your level as your back pressed against a pair of legs, belonging to a guard. 

Everyone seemed to completely forget the boy in handcuffs was even sitting at the table. 

“Loomis, this is not a very good idea. Considering Michael being a fucking psycho-” This guard was cut off once more by Loomis only to have him pick you up and set you on the chair in front of Michael, where he was previously sitting.

“Now, this is my patient. Say hello, you have a guest Mikey,” Loomis put his hand on your back. Everything was moving too fast for you to understand what anyone was saying or what was happening.

Silence.

“Okay, Miss, me and my guards are going to be on the other side of this doorway. If you would please, this shouldn’t take much of your time.”

Bitter silence.

“Loomis, what the actual fuc-”

“Shut the hell up and get into the office, if she manages to get him to talk we're going to have a major breakthrough!” Loomis spat and shut the door. Nothing else he or the guards said was audible.

You sat there in silence for a few seconds until Loomis or one of the guards tapped on the glass window separating the five of you, “Darling it's okay to talk to him, he's harmless.”

For being so young you could tell something about Loomis was off. You turned your attention back to Michael who was positioned the exact same way you saw him moments before; dirty light brown hair in front of his eyes with his tall, lean body hunched over. He seemed eerily tall for being around your age.

It couldn’t have even been a whole 5 minutes, everything happened so suddenly.

“Hi,” You said quietly.

Nothing.

“Why are you so sad? Those men looked friendly.” Talking about the guards, that is.

A small, almost amused grunt.

“I'm here with my daddy to see my mama. She’s been in here for a while but she’s gonna come home soon, back to me and daddy. Why are you here?”

Pure silence once again.

“Sometimes, I like to color with this one old man here, his colored pencils are nice,” You reach forward and grab a piece of paper and the old, nearly broken crayons in front of him. He hadn’t seemed to had touched them at all, even with the hand that was free.

Starting to color you ask, well more so tell him little things like how your day was and which color was your favorite of what you had in your hand. He didn’t seem to make much noise except for a few entertained grunts at how happy you were to just talk to someone, especially him.

“So what’s your name?”

“Michael.”

“I used to ha-”

Before you could finish answering Loomis followed by his two guards bustled out of the office to confirm that Michael had just spoken not only in general, but to a female. Loomis hurriedly rushed you out of the space and back to the main entrance where he talked to a receptionist as you walked back into the visiting hall.

~~~

This seemed to happen more frequently when you visited your mother.

 Each time you would wander the halls to find Michael’s room eventually one of the guards would wait for you by the main entrance and lead you back to Michael. Each ‘session’ Michael had answered a bit more than before, only simple questions like, “How was your day?”, or “Did you sleep well?”

After a few years, with your mother not seeming to have any interest in leaving, you looked forward to seeing Michael more than her. 

Heading towards the left wing and down the first flight of stairs you hear Loomis and some other man that you couldn’t recognize talking outside of Michael's cell.

“Loomis this is ridiculous. This…. Th-this monster doesn’t have any feelings. The testing and psychological evaluations all come back the same. You have your head so far up your ass on this case Loomis, I swear you need to drop it now. Michael is a deranged psychopath, sociopath, we don’t even know, that will kill that girl the moment you uncuff him today. This experiment you have going on is far too dangerous. I certainly can't go back to the Head of the Board and tell them, ‘why yes, I did accept Loomis to have another minor in Myers’ cell unattended to’.”

“I have something going on here Grant. Yes the Board will decline my actions until further evaluation but the legal statistics here will handle another death if it does occur. Her mother, as I've gathered is clinically depressed and easily could affect her daughters health, which is an easy excuse if something does happen to go wrong.” Loomis and Grant continue for a moment until you step onto the bottom step as they both look at you.

“What… do you mean, ‘if something goes wrong’?” You questioned harshly.

“Ah, Miss, it's just simple background checks to make sure you are secured to see Michael,” Loomis was a deadbeat liar, it was written all over his egotistical face.

You knew this once you were old enough to understand all the made up bullshit he said.

So what if Michael would be uncuffed today? Yeah, Michael could easily snap your neck if he wanted too, he was a big guy now, almost 6 1/2ft if not already and his shoulder’s were broader than anything you’ve ever seen. You saw him stand up with the guards once, and he towered over them by a hunch, let alone you, being considered taller than normal for your age.

You let yourself in, Loomis following quickly behind you as you sat in front of Michael.

“Hey Michael,” You said, still trying to process what Loomis and Grant were talking about.

Nothing.

“Now Mikey, I’m going to-” Loomis started.

“Don't call him Mikey.” You were starting to get more and more agitated with Loomis every time he opened his mouth.

“Pardon me?”

“Don’t call him Mikey. His name is Michael and he should be referred to as Michael, he isn’t some sort of pet you have here, Samuel, ” You glare at Loomis as Michael sits with his head down.

“Now….Michael, I'm going to uncuff you today to talk to her, one wrong move and every cop in a five mile radius will be in this room.”

“That's a bit unnecessary, Dr. Loomis,” At this point you almost uncuffed Michael yourself.

Loomis leaned down to uncuff Michael and set them on the table next to him, but taking the keys and shoving them into his waistcoat pocket. Michael didn’t move his hands or anything, just remained in the same position since you first met him years before. 

Once Loomis shut the door to the office you leaned in to Michael and put your hands on the table.

“Michael I don't like what they have going on here or how they talk about you. Loomis, or whoever the fuck he is.. Is.. not right. I don’t know a word idiotic enough to describe him”

Nothing.

“I bet you he’s a cuck,” You sat back a bit and crossed your arms.

A small chuckle emitted from his stomach. This is the first time you heard him actually laugh, it made you smile in surprise.

“Michael, did you... just laugh? At me? What the fuck?” Your smile grew to a grin as you leaned in towards the table once again.

He smirked. “God dammit, you smug bastard. Loomis is a real asshat either way.” You breathed out.

Michael laughed at ‘asshat’. That one he’s never heard before.

“Could…. I see your hands?” You said, out of the blue.

Nothing, as his smile immediately faded and the silence grew once again.

“I- I mean I've only seen your head and a bit of your face, at least do me the courtesy of letting me see your fucking hands when they aren't handcuffed to this goddamn dollar store cardboard table!” You joked.

Nothing.

“Fuck, I’m sor-” 

Michael slowly moved his left arm and then his right until his hands were on the table in a sort of fist. His arms were muscular as his shirt seemed torn at how built his body was. You reached out and touched them with both of your hands. They were cold and callused, but so much bigger compared to yours. They could almost fit your whole head in them. You couldn’t not touch them.

You quickly stopped touching his hands as soon as you realized you should have asked. “Oh… Um, my bad Michael I should have a-”

“Your hands are small,” He mocked you, his voice low and heavy, catching you off guard completely.

“Your hands are so big,” Your smile stretched from ear to ear.  You took one of his hands and looked at it closely while playing with his fingers. He chuckled again, amused with you. His normal urges to crush a skull completely gone, and they had been for a while since he had met with you. Well, his urges to kill you were gone. Still very much present for Loomis. He wasn’t too fond of how he talked about you when you left.

“Well, at least I got a sentence out of you, not even meaning to,” You beamed.

Loomis rushed into the room as Michael’s grip on your hand tightened. You had grown up with a bunch of boys so the grip wasn’t as bad, but it still made you wince in surprise as you looked back at Michael, eyes wide. 

Loomis darted towards you to take you back into the lobby as Michael stood up and jerked you towards him across the table. You were able to see his face, but it was all a blur it was so fast. You noticed eyes,  large and blue, yet so dark, like nothing was looking back at you as his toned face got close to yours. 

“Haddonfield.”

His voice huskier and honestly, scarier than before. Loomis tore you away as guards grab at Michael’s arms to pull him back forcefully. Michael let go of your hand to struggle against them as Loomis rushes you down to the corridor entrance where your father was waiting.

As you rush out of the building practically being dragged out by Loomis you hear buzzers or alarms going off in the building.

“Oh, ah, yes everything went well thank you for coming once again Miss, lovely to see you again. Michael will be…uhh... just fine,” Loomis said looking back and around the car before shutting you in and smacking the top of the roof as your father drove home.

~6 Years Later~

“Haddonfield, huh? What are you up to now Michael…?” You say, only a few hours from Haddonfield Illinois, your moving truck trailing behind you.

Reuniting

Before settling into your, well, Michael’s house, you went through town first to meet the people and learn more about Haddonfield itself while the movers set your belongings on the large, wrap around porch of the house.

You learned about Michael killing his sister, Judith, when he was young, which made sense to how you met him. You also learned about the killings that happened once he had escaped, which also made sense to the events that caused you to be rushed out by Loomis. 

Every detail someone had told you from the town pieced together the half-assed explanations Loomis had given you in the offices. The hardest part was trying not to say, “Oh, Michael? Michael Myers? Yea I’m about to go see him, yah yeet!” whenever someone would mention how horrendous he was and his poor family. 

Figuring out where everything was located in Haddonfield was your goal, but you mainly wanted to clear up every detail about Michael that you could on the way.

Questions still rang your mind like, “Who was Loomis?”, “Why did Michael trust, if you would call it trust, you?”, “Was he even still here?” or "was he even going to let you live?”.

It was late and you decided to head back to the house. It was a somewhat older looking home from the outside, but large on the inside with spaced out rooms and a lavish upstairs with a wrap around staircase.

Of course the place had been a bit run down since anyone had last been living in it. Michael must have only visited there, rather than lived.

You weren’t even sure he would be there at this point. It had been about six years since you had seen Michael, but you trusted him. Either way you weren’t going to be moving a lot in tonight, mainly because of your respect for Michael and his house that you felt like it wasn’t right to just take away all of his memories to start some of your own.

You paid the truck driver for setting most of the boxes on the porch and looked around inside.

Definitely outdated, but that wasn’t the major problem, the holes in the flooring and ceiling were. There weren’t many, but a few that would need to be fixed as soon as you could get around to them. “Jesus Christ. Michael, how do you stay here?” You shook your head and looked around more upstairs before finding, what you assumed was Judith’s old room. The feeling was hot and heavy, like you could feel eyes watching you as you moved around the house. 

You decided to leave that room alone and just close the door. The master bedroom was across the hall, on the other side of the staircase that led upstairs. 

Bringing up a few personal boxes of clothes and such you check out the master bathroom. Large windows looked out on the backyard with a tub and separate shower, fairly new for such an older house. 

Placing your bathroom needs on the long stretched sink you step back into the bedroom and place your bedding and clothes on a dresser.

~~~

It had took you a long while to get here and bringing in all of the heavy duty boxes and furniture wasn’t very pleasing to you, being about 11 p.m. now. You figured you just do it all in the morning and work on finding out more on Michael after moving your things in.

~~~

The eyes you had felt in Judith’s room were indeed those of Michael’s. Of course he had waited as long as he needed, you had trusted him and respected him back in Smith’s Grove, and he knew that you would arrive at some point. It wasn’t like he was leaving any time soon anyways.

You seemed to like the house as much as Michael did when he was much younger, now it was just a casing for dead memories he chose not to recall. He would have confronted you earlier, but too many people seemed to be around today, most likely to discuss why the hell someone would move into the Myer’s house.

He also wanted to make sure it was actually you. He knew it was you, but he still needed time to let you just wander now that you had arrived. While you had been out in town, he followed you and watched who you talked to and what stores you entered. You seemed to be comfortable in Haddonfield, and not one person gave you a wrong look, they just found it odd that someone would move into the Myer’s house. 

Michael couldn’t give two shits what you did with the house, as long as you kept it there and didn’t sell it off. He was hoping you would tear away everything in Judith’s room, just practically get rid of it completely. The house just had to stay.

He had watched you examine the bathroom in the master bedroom for a short while before you had gone to bed.

Moving to the front of the house he noticed all of your boxes still on the porch along with heavy furniture like a couch, a desk, and some other appliances. It didn’t take him long to move all of the boxes inside anyways, even though there were many of them.

Not much furniture had been in the house for years, and besides Judith’s room and a few holes on the ceiling, the house was spotless. Just dirty, and that was all.

With all of the boxes and furniture moved into the front area and empty living room, Michael waited for morning.

Sleep was never his thing, and he never needed to be comfortable when resting either. He could sleep sitting straight up, if you even wanted to call it sleeping, more so short rests, naps almost.

He had sat in an older chair that his mother used to sit in when he was younger and rested for no more than an forty-five minutes to an hour, but that was enough for him. The rest of the time he remained snooping through your boxes or sitting in his mother’s chair.

~~~

By morning, you had woke up earlier than expected, 8 a.m. to be precise. You normally would wake up this early and just go back to sleep, but being here gave you energy to get up and roll, like you actually had a reason to get up now. You figured it would be best to finish moving in everything from outside in case the storm that was called decided to roll in early.

It was still somewhat dark outside, enough for you to walk right past the boxes in the front room and living room along with Michael sitting in his mother’s chair still, watching you walk by.

You opened the door but… nothing was to there to bring in. You turned back around and looked back into the living room. Every box was there, even the furniture. Michael had walked back and was standing behind the door, but when you closed it you walked past him once more.

You rubbed your face and eyes, thinking nothing of it, as you walked over to a stack of boxes and opened the first one that had just a bunch of your older books in it. The office upstairs had a bookcase on each wall near an open bay window, which would make a good space for you to work.

You grabbed all the books you could and turned around to head up the spiral staircase, but you bump into something broad instead. You look up and see nothing but navy blue and a white mask. All you could do was stare as you backed away slightly. 

The figure was deathly tall, he literally towered over you.

“Umm… ca…. Can I he-... help you?” You stammered, backing up against your pile of boxes.

His head turned to the side to a bit, but remained eye contact with you. His eyes were a bright blue, yet nothing seemed to look back at you. They almost reminded you of Michaels….

You look back at him, narrowing your eyes as you drop the books and move closer towards him, it was Michael. He lifts his mask up slightly past his nose and grins. You grab his jaw with both of your hands out of excitement as his mask falls back, off of his head.

This was the very first time you actually got to see his face. His whole face. He pulled away, eyes wide, almost ashamed that he didn’t have his mask, but you reach forward again and grabbed him.

“Hey, hey, hey, no, you come back here,” You laugh. He only looks at you. You run your hands up and down his jawline as you study his masculine features. Michael was so much taller than you still, it was like a little kid trying to tug on someone's sleeve for attention.

This time, you pull away and look down.

“Dammit, I did it again. I’m sorry Michael, I shouldn’t have done that…” You rub the back of your neck, but this time he grabs one of your hands.

It had been six years, and his hands were still so much larger than yours, like your hands had shrunk since the last time you saw him.

“Your hands are so big,” You smiled. It was like you were talking to younger Michael again.

“Your hands are still so small.”

Deciding To Stay You were able to finish unpacking most of your belongings that day, with Michael off moving something much heavier or just sort of standing and observing what you did as you renovated his childhood home. 

Deep down, he couldn't wait to see what you would do to the house and what changes you would make to it.

“This should be the last one that needs to be brought up here, into this room that is. Most of the other things downstairs are just my clothes and other shit to go into the bathroom,” You state as you set down the last box of books on the floor next to your desk. 

That room, for now, was complete.

~~~

Before he had begun earlier that morning moving in your kitchen appliances, you had successfully managed to convince him to take his mask off for the day. It took a bit of encouraging, but you told him nothing had to be done outside so no one would have to see him.

It was about four in the afternoon when each box was placed in its designated room and most of the kitchen, living room, bathroom, and office area looked somewhat decent. You had a few days before you would call the electrician or cable company, but you could do without that for a bit. Everything you needed worked fine; toilet, shower, stove, fridge, etc.

“Michael?” You had began rummaging through the fridge putting things away and looking for something to make for dinner. Both Michael and you skipped breakfast and you only had a drink for lunch, if that could be considered lunch.

Come to think of it, you’ve never seen Michael eat, at all; ever.

He only looked over at you. He was standing in the entrance to the kitchen as soon as you called him from upstairs. How he managed to get there so fast and so quietly amazed you, but you learned not to question it.

“Two things: One, I’m making something for dinner, I don't know what yet, but what would you like? I haven’t seen you eat at all today… or… ever… And Two,” At this point you stopped and turned around to face him, he was now right behind you as you leaned back against the countertop, “I… I don’t want to change anything about you but… God I don't know how to put this without sounding bitchy.” You laughed nervously to try and break the silence.

His eyes narrowed on you, almost as if he was saying ‘just say it’. He was good at talking with his eyes and little actions, but it was hard to actually get him to answer you with words.

“Alright, alright. You don't have to if you don’t want to, obviously if you wouldn’t want to you wouldn’t, but that's besides the point,” You shook your head. You were rambling now, “If you could try to talk a bit that would be great. I mean, just… I don’t know, it would just be nice to hear you talk, and to answer me sometimes. You’re a bit hard to read Michael,” You chuckled at the last statement. You didn’t want him to talk all the time, because you knew he wouldn’t, just a few things here and there.

Michael continued to stare at you, and walked towards the fridge and pulled out something. It was just a mixture of food that really didn’t go together; some fruit, lunch meat, salsa, and a bottle of ketchup. He stood straight up again, he actually had to crouch to see in the fridge he was so damn tall.

There was a long pause before he did answer, his voice emotionless, “I’ll try.”

You gave a wry smile and sighed, “You don’t know much about food do you?”

He looked down at the array of what he picked out and shook his head. Food at Smith’s Grove, as you could guess, wasn’t very high quality.

“Do… you know how to cook?”

He shook his head.

“Bake?”

Nope.

“Anything…?”

He paused for a moment, “Microwave…” He trailed off before shaking his head.

“Well… at least that’s a start. But… do you mind if I talk to you while I fix something? I’ve probably been talking a lot but I… want to know I guess. Fuck, it’s been what? Six years since I last saw you and… I guess I missed talking to you or, talking at you. All I really know about you is your favorite color is navy blue, you killed a lot of people and your mom apparently made some bomb ass spaghetti.”

Your cheeks flushed as you thought about when you and him were younger and your visits. Was it in the best place? No. Was it around people either of you trusted? No. But it was still something.

Fuck it. Spaghetti it is, you thought.

Michael let out a sigh, or a grunt, it was hard to tell. He was smiling ever so slightly as he stood on the other side of the island. What really called you yo him was your confidence and will to… thrive. Like nothing else mattered in the world to you.

You had moved here knowing God damn well that you were looking for him, Michael-fucking-Myers, the boy from the asylum you met when you were both so little. The boy who killed his sister and came back every Halloween to just rampage through the small town.

He saw the looks on peoples faces when hearing that you had moved into the Myers house, yet you didn’t pay them one mind. Let alone him taking his mask off and chuckling at you.

It didn’t feel right to him, but it did at the same time. Confusion raced inside of him but you were, at this point, a necessity to him. Love? He didn’t think so, but he didn’t know what to think at this point. He didn’t really… remember what emotions felt like. It was only fair to you that you knew everything, seeing that you actually cared for him and missed him.

He owed that to you.

He took a deep breath before he advised you that it was going to be a lot.

“Michael, we live together now, c’mon,” You teased.

He had seen what you decided to make. It made living in the house feel like he was home again, like nothing about what he did was relevant then. 

It really confused the fuck him.

~~~

It took most of the time that you cooked dinner for him to explain. You had asked him a lot of questions about what you heard and if they were true. His head nods and shakes were subtle but explanatory. When he did make a correction is was small and to the point. You figured this was as much as you would get out of him, but that was good enough. 

You had his trust, and he had your feelings.

Yeah it was a bit fucked, but it’s who you fell for… oddly enough, Michael Myers of Haddonfield.

You didn’t interrupt much, and if you did it was just a nod or some small comment about the situation. What caught him off guard was your acceptance, so to say. Nothing he admitted to bothered you in the slightest. It was almost as if you were amused at his story told in nods, yet so passionate in listening to him, something no one ever did, until now.

Preparing both plates, you also asked him about the house. “I didn’t touch much of Judith’s room, but-”

“Do anything to it. Tear it down, anything. Make this yours,” his voice was croaky but strong, aggressive as if he was waiting for that.

“Well… I didn’t want to just come into your house and-” You had gotten two drinks for the both of you.

“Yours.” He cut you off, making sure to deeply emphasize ‘yours’ to better prove his point.

“Ours.” You corrected back.

You smiled and set his plate on the counter in front of him. You hadn’t bought a proper dining room table or chairs, so leaning in the countertop would have to do for now.

“If you don’t like it you don’t have to eat it.” You leaned down to take a bite, but Michael had already finished his plate. You stopped mid bite for a second and glared at the plate he had just set back down on the counter; clean. Tilting your head and cutting your eyes up and him you grin and continued eating.

“There's more,” You had a mouth full of noodle as you pointed behind you to the pot on the stove.

At least he seemed to like your food, the pot was empty when you turned around to get more; it was all on his plate.

“More-” His voice was low and muffled by the bread he had shoved in his mouth.

“No!” You hissed as you laughed and threw away your plate, “We would have had the rest of that tomorrow for lunch or dinner if you didn’t stuff your face Myers.”

Michael glared at you and he shoved the last bit of spaghetti and bread he had into his mouth.

Cleaning up his mess and the dishes you walked over to him and looked up at him.

“Spaghetti every Saturday night from here on, got it? With leftovers for Sunday lunch included, got it?” You put your pointer finger on his chest and waited for his response before you would let him walk away.

He was pleased to hear that you were staying here and seemed happy. He didn’t expect for this to turn out the way it did, but this was sure as hell fine for him.

His eyes studied you for a bit before he picked you up and sat you on the countertop, and leaned in towards your red lips, staring at you with his cold blue eyes.

He sneered gruffly with a single word,

“Deal.”

[connor-draws-things]

Hey, I know you guys didn't ask for it, but here it is anyways

// It's Jackson's backstory (he finally has a killer name, Blind Brother and @strawberrydadmare helped me out with the name) The story is 2k words btw, so skip past it if you don't want to read bc idk how to add a "keep reading" thing on mobile (Also, reminder that I did not edit this and wrote it while I was tired, so cut me some slack if this makes very little sense)

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"Another day, more bullshit." Jackson said to himself, tying his shoes and zipping up his backpack.

"I know, right? This is stupid. Mom and Dad put us through hell everyday and we STILL have to go to school and deal with the teacher's lectures and rules." Leo said, annoyed.

Jackson waited at the door, "Are you ready to go?" Leo nodded and walked out the door, Jackson following behind him.

The entire day went as normal, Jackson and Leo got yelled at for things they didn't do, had many assignments to finish, and a hell of a lot of homework. But if the teachers actually thought they were going to do all that work, they were highly mistaken. They came back from school, got yelled at by their parents on why the house wasn't clean, and was threatened to clean up immediately. Of course, when Jackson rolled his eyes and started walking upstairs, having done this so many times before, his mother slapped him and told him to get to work.

So he did, and that's how Leo and Jackson spent two hours of their life on cleaning.

Later that Night

"I'm gonna run away." Jackson said to Leo, "you should come with me."

"What?! No way, dude!" Leo responded, "You're stupid if you're even thinking about some shit like that. Mom or Dad could catch you."

"So let them, I don't even care at this point. I just don't want to sit around doing nothing about the way I'm treated." Jackson retorted, "I already have my bags ready to go. So are you coming with me or not?

"I already said no! Like, where would we live? I'm sure Mom and Dad would definitely find us living on the streets. We need to get jobs so we could have food to eat, and what about washing our clothes? We can't afford a washing machine!" Leo tried to reason

"We could live in that woodsy place, we could make shelter, hunt animals, and there's probably a creek in there somewhere to wash our clothes in."

"Hell no. I am not going into those woods. Last time we went hiking there, I felt like something was watching me. And now, with all the rumors going around about The Slenderman, you're insane if you go into those woods!"

"You're just paranoid. The Slenderman isn't real, he's just some stupid urban legend parents tell their kids to get them to behave. So I guess you're not coming with me, then?"

"I already said no! I'm not going with you!"

"...Well at least one more thing before I go," Jackson holds up his pinkie finger, "brothers forever?"

Leo sighs and interlocks his pinkie with his twin's, "Brothers forever. Be safe out there, okay? And don't let Mom and Dad catch you."

"I'll keep that in mind. See ya, Leo." He waves goodbye to Leo before stepping out of his bedroom door to see his mom standing outside, waiting. She had heard the whole conversation.

"Running away?! You selfish little brat!" She held Jackson by the ear and walked him down the stairs, in front of the basement door. She opens the door and throws him inside, locking it, "You can't run away now, can you? Wait till I get your father."

Ever since then, if Jackson even made eye contact with the rest of the family, he'd get thrown against a wall. He began growing numb to his punishments.

It was late one night, and Jackson was cold. He had no blankets and had to lie on the concrete ground. He could barely fall asleep. He heard the sound of a key opening the door and the door creaking open. Leo walked into the basement.

"Jackson, come on, mom and dad are asleep right now, you don't have long, you gotta run away now."

"Leo? But you were against me running away before."

"That was over half a year ago, you have to run away now. Go to the cops or something, tell them about mom and dad."

"But the nearest police station is at least an hour away on foot!"

"Take a shortcut through the woods, and take some food with you, I know dad has been starving you." Leo told Jackson. Jackson did as he said and began to walk outside barefoot.

"Are you forgetting something?" Leo held out his pinkie. Jackson smiled softly and interlocked their pinkies. They didn't have to say it, they just knew what it meant.

"Brothers forever."

Jackson walked out the door, barefoot, as Leo walked back to his room and went to bed.

It had been half an hour into the woods, and Jackson was getting tired of walking. He began crying and fell to the ground, tears streaming down his cheeks. None of this would've happened if he hadn't been so loud, none of this would've happened if he just didn't have the thought about it in the first place

He had bruises and cuts all over his body from both the physical abuse and the branches that poked out at him every second.

He cried on the ground and curled up into a ball. He was going to stay there for about ten minutes, but his plans changed after he had heard something nearby him. He immediately perked up and began listening and watching very closely.

As he was scouting the area around him, he noticed something in the trees. Something tall. Too tall to be a person, but didn't have the shape of any animal or tree there. Jackson stared closely and found that this person had no face. It had to be the Slenderman the rumors had mentioned. A tall figure who lives in the woods, dressed in a suit and has no face.

Jackson was scared, who wouldn't be? He backed away from Slenderman as he got closer and closer to Jackson. Instead of killing him right then and there, Slenderman held out his hand. Jack, still very afraid, took his hand and was helped to get back on his feet.

"Thank you, Slend-" He didn't even finish his sentence before Slenderman was gone. He shrugged it off, and began walking to the police station again. But a voice started ringing, repeating in his head.

"Go back to home. Don't go to the police station. Kill your parents. Then come back to the woods. The Slenderman will be waiting for you. He will give you a new home." It was repeating over and over again, Jackson could barely hear himself thinking regular thoughts again, the voice kept pushing to the from of hi mind until he stopped and considered the option. He eventually did what the voice told him to do, a rush of adrenaline coursing through his veins.

He began the long way back home, and was greeted by a house with all of its lights off and everyone inside sleeping. He snuck in through the backdoor, where the kitchen is and grabbed a long, sharp knife, almost brand new.

He slowly walked up the stairs, careful not to make noise and slowly opened his parents' room door. He was finally getting payback for all the shit he'd gone through over the years.

He raised the knife and forced it down on his mom's neck, killing her almost immediately, she almost screamed if Jackson hadn't cut so deep into her neck. His dad was next. Jackson lightly traced the knife over the area of the heart, trying his best to remember anatomy of internal organs and where the best place to strike would be. He finally found the spot and cut deep into it, His dad screamed loudly before Jackson covered his mouth and took the knife out, leaving his father to bleed to death.

"J-jackson?" Leo stood at the doorway, rushing over as soon as he heard his dad scream. Jackson looked over at Leo and smiled.

"They're finally gone!" He said, placing the knife on the bed.

"I told you to get the police, not kill them! Oh my god...Look at what you did...oh my god…" Leo stared in disbelief at the bodies, terrified that his brother would do such a thing.

"We have to go to the woods now, Leo. Come on, let's go!" Jackson tugged at Leo's shirt.

"The cops are going to find us, they're gonna think that I helped you! No, no, no, no, I didn't kill anybody! I can't stay here!" Leo said to himself

"That's why we have to go to the woods now. Come on, brothers forever, right?" Jackson held out his pinkie.

"No." Leo responded. He quickly grabbed the knife from the bed and pointed it at Jackson, his hands shaking, "If you come closer, I'll kill you, you friggin psycho."

"Oh, come on, don't be like that." Jackson started walking towards him. Leo cut Jackson's cheek and it began bleeding, "Oh, so you weren't joking, huh?" Jackson tried wiping the blood away but it began smudging all over his face.

"That was a warning, next time, you'll actually get it." Leo threatened.

"Leo, just calm down-" Police sirens began wailing in the far distance, they would be there in 20 minutes at most. Jackson looked back at Leo after he got distracted and saw that Leo was now pointing the knife to himself.

"Leo, what the hell do you think you're doing?!" Jackson yelled. Leo drove the knife right into his stomach as hard as he could and pulled it back out, stabbing himself repeatedly as much as he could.

Jackson stood there, staring at the dead body of his brother, "No, oh jeez, no..." He broke down in loud sobs, "No, I can't look at this...No...he wouldn't just do that…" He began freaking out, trying to think of how to stop looking at his brother's dead body. He tried covering his eyes and closing them, but the image still flashed in his mind. His last resort was to take his eyes out completely.

He tried to scratch them out, but that didn't work he stared at the knife in his brother's hand and slowly reached for it, stabbing his eyes and pulling them out of their sockets. But the image of his dead brother stayed in his head. He couldn't take it anymore. The sirens were getting closer and he began to panic. He ran down the stairs, and fell down, bumping into everything on the way out of the backdoor. He ran into the woods behind his house, running into branches along the way.

He finally stopped when he felt he was far enough away. He then felt a familiar hand on his shoulder

"Slenderman?"

Slenderman grabbed him by the arm and started leading him through the woods. Jackson stood in place, however, refusing to go with him.

"You never said my brother would die! Bring him back! Please!..." Jackson's voice began breaking at the thought of his brother, "I'll only go with you if you bring him back." There was a long silence.

"Slenderman? Are you still there?"

"Hey, Jackson."

"Leo? Oh my goodness, Slenderman actually brought you back?!" Jackson waited for Leo to talk to him again, but was met with more silence, "You're still mad at me for killing Mom and Dad, aren't you?" 

"Yeah, kinda. But I mean, the world could do without them, right?" Leo responded, "You should probably start walking now, Slenderman is about to leave without you. Follow my voice."

"Oh! He's still here!" Jackson began walking to where he heard Leo's voice and eventually bumped into Slenderman, who didn't really mind it at all. Jackson felt himself walking up some stairs, "Where are we?"

"You're in Slenderman's mansion now. He's going to take care of you, but you have to obey him." Leo explains.

"Oh, of course!" Jackson bumped into a wall while walking around the mansion.

Leo laughed, "You're gonna have to learn to walk around, now that you're blind, you idiot."

"You're gonna help me, right?" Jackson asked.

"Of course I will."

Jackson held out his pinkie, "...Brothers forever?" He felt a warm sensation wrapped around his pinkie.

"Brothers forever." Leo responded. If only his brother could see the smile spread across his face.

[umbureraakademi]

Introductory Note About the AU

-a/n start-

[Potential spoilers for anyone who hasn’t seen or finished TUA Netflix series but seriously how could you stop yourself from watching such a captivating show.]

Word Count: 1501

Police Case Inspiration: S1E1 of Brooklyn Nine Nine

-a/n end-

The Hargreeves Case

Chapter 1

He’s been staring at his case file since he got into the precinct. Well, that’s what most people may have thought he was doing, but with sunglasses on and a slightly nodding head it wouldn’t take a genius to know what he was actually doing.

“Diego.”

A slight snore escaped from this nodding zombie. Obviously it was going to take something more than a simple name call to wake this guy up, Chuck realized.

With a sigh Chuck carefully slipped Diego’s case file from his hands, the latter barely noticed it. He would’ve just continued on with his slumber if it weren’t for Chuck whacking his head with the file, knocking his sunglasses off.

“Beeman! What the fuck, man.” a groggy Diego cussed as he picked up his sunglasses.

“Seriously, Diego? You couldn’t pick a better time to take a nap. The Captain wants to see you. Maybe drown in some mouthwash before you go to his office though I can smell what you were drinking last night.”

“Shut up, Chuck. Not like you haven’t had a hangover before. Gimme that.” Diego retorted, snatching back his case file and putting it on his desk.

“Yeah but at least I--” Chuck stopped himself mid sentence as he was about to say that he didn’t come to work hungover almost every single day. But as he watched his friend stare at a picture at his desk he felt a sudden wave of sympathy.

Everyone knows why Detective Hargreeves, who used to be one of the most talented detectives in the precinct has been going off drunk every night and turning up the next morning hungover and just flying through the day. Chuck, of all people, would know exactly what he was going through.

It’s been a year since the incident and they say time heals, but how long is it going to take Diego to heal until he gets kicked out of the precinct? It’s actually a miracle he hasn’t been fired yet.

“Look, umm… I’ll get you some water and some aspirin and then you can go see the Captain.” Chuck offered.

“Thanks, man.” was the soft reply.

- - - - - 

“Captain, you wanted to see me?” Diego greeted as he sauntered into Captain Lee’s office and closed the door behind him.

“Detective Hargreeves.” Captain Lee started as he turned away from a file he was looking through to bring his attention Diego. “I wanted an update on that murder case at the Morgenthau apartment.”

Diego shrugged his shoulders. “Perp broke in, stole a few stuff, guy was shot, he’s dead. What else is there to update?”

The Captain gave him a long stare before saying, “Any leads on the shooter?”

“I dunno could be anyone who was hungry -- I mean a watch and a laptop I get, but ham? What the fuck?”

“Detective Hargreeves, a man was shot. Why aren’t you taking this seriously?”

“I am taking this seriously.”

“I gave this case to you last week. You have zero leads and why are you coming into my office smelling like alcohol if you’re taking this ‘seriously’?”

“Look, Captain.” Diego started, his head starting to heat up as his tone took a sharp turn. “I’m working on it, okay? Murders don’t get solved overnight, I’m not exactly an all-seeing all father or whatnot. I’ll look into the stupid ham that was stolen because there’s obviously something strange with that.” he continued, rolling his eyes.

Captain Lee sighed and looked down at his desk. “Hargreeves, I know it’s been a hard year for you, but you can’t keep dragging on cases like this.” he said softly, then he looked up at Diego who looked away. “You know my offer still stands for you to go on administrative leave indefinitely.”

“And I’ll tell you the same thing I told you when you gave me that offer: Fuck. No. Telling me to sit behind a desk doing next to nothing could be the worst thing you can do to me after…” he stopped himself, not being able to continue.

There was a short pause before the Captain started, “I get it, but as Commanding Officer of this precinct I can’t have my cases slack behind.” Captain Lee said sternly. “If you want to keep doing cases, fine. But you won’t be doing any more murders. It was a mistake to give you this case in the first place.”

Stunned by what he was hearing Diego’s mouth dropped as he stared at the man behind his desk. “W-what?” he stammered.

“I’m re-assigning the Morgenthau case to Detective Beeman. Until you get it together you’ll only be doing petty theft cases and public disturbances.” Diego was at a loss for words, not believing anything Captain Lee was saying. As the Captain waved his hand he added, “You’re dismissed.”

Diego took a sharp breath and slowly approached the Captain’s table, almost menacingly. “You can’t do this to me.” he muttered.

“I’m your Commanding Officer, I get to decide where cases go and I’m supposed to give them to someone who can solve them efficiently.” Captain Lee responded firmly, looking Diego dead in the eyes. “Turnover your case files to Beeman. That is an order. You. Are. Dismissed.” he said with finality.

Diego could have just thrown a knife at him and purposely make it only slightly cut him on the side of his ear to scare him off and reconsider reassigning his case. But he worked under Captain Lee’s leadership long enough to know it still wouldn’t make than man budge, and he was just tired and wanted to hit the bar again for another drink.

Wordlessly Diego turned away from Captain Lee and as he left his office slammed his door, leaving the older man as he took a deep sigh.

“Hargreeves, pull it together.” he said to himself.

- - - - - 

The door slamming shocked everyone at the precinct, but no one else was more shocked than a sleeping figure sitting at a desk right outside the Captain’s office. Being jolted awake from slumber the figure gave a loud yelp before falling off the chair, attracting Diego’s attention.

As far as he knew that desk was empty for a few days ever since Captain Lee’s assistant resigned to get married, determined to being a housewife. He didn't even notice someone was sitting on it again before he went into the Captain's office. Curious, he approached the desk and bent over to find out who he had just shocked enough for them to fall off their chair.

A sudden impact on his chin made him back off, mixed with his and a female’s voice both giving out a loud “FUCK!”

“What’s the deal, man?! Can’t a girl take her power nap without some psycho slamming doors and shit.” retorted the woman behind the assistant’s desk, rubbing her head where she had just hit Diego’s chin.

“You’re not even supposed to be taking a nap while at work.” Diego replied, rubbing his sore chin before bringing his eyes down to look at the chick who just headbutted his chin. Then he had to lower his gaze a little bit more - she was petite, with both of them now standing at full height she barely even reached his shoulders. She was also dressed like one of those teenagers they’d catch spray painting walls as opposed to a Commanding Officer’s assistant.

“Well, Officer.” the girl said mockingly. “If you’re going to berate me on taking a nap at my desk then you shouldn’t be doing the same thing a few minutes ago before T’Challa hit you in the head.”

“Okay, first off, I’m a detective.” Diego corrected. “Second, T’Challa? Really?”

“What? He’s African-American, I don’t know his name, and I like Marvel.” she started. “And whatever, officer, detective, police guy, you guys are all the same shitty cops to me.” rolling her eyes she sat back at her chair and proceeded to scroll through Instagram on her cellphone.

Unbelieveabe. Diego thought, further wondering how she even got through with the job interview knowing how stiff Captain Lee is. “I assume you’re the Captain’s new assistant.” he said.

“Wow! Great solving, Detective.” she said sarcastically, not looking up from her cellphone and now swinging side to side on her chair. “A woman sitting at a desk right outside the Captain’s office designated for his assistant - I mean who could’ve thought that woman would be his… uhh… new assistant?” she added, only making Diego more pissed off than he was when he left the Captain’s office.

“I don’t need this.” he said, giving up as he started to walk away.

“Goodbye, Detective. Hope you go solve some shit.” she said nonchalantly before giggling at a dachshund doing cute faces on her Instagram feed. “Dachs are the best.” she said to herself.

After being somewhat “demoted” from serious cases from the Captain, Diego thought he couldn’t be given anymore bullshit than this. Turns out the bullshit was just going to keep coming after meeting the Captain’s new assistant.

[gdreamzseternal]

Ben Sharpio

Taught me something today.. while I don’t herd myself with whatever the fucking sheep party he hopped in. Way to go by the way BEN. I totally liked you til you brought up your need to add both a political and religious bias yuck different rant different day. I don’t hate him though I agree with ‘most’ of his perspectives. Anyway I digress..

Where the fuck did this idea of “safe space” and trigger warning come from? Nah if you are dramatically effected by words on a screen get the fuck off the site you’re on. Other people shouldn’t have to sensor themselves because you’re fucking sensitive. I have people comment on MY POSTS. People who don’t even follow me, telling me to tag my posts with a trigger warning. If you are so damaged by that particular subject why are you even browsing in tags that could potentially contain things related to your “trigger”.

God the internet has made us a bunch of cowards. Remember when stranger danger was legit and people weren’t so afraid to take risks!?

I have gender dysphoria. I love being a boy, a girl and everything in between. I don’t need to cut myself up (anymore ;) and scream at everyone to notice me to heal. Lmao. I go to THERAPY and talk about why I was so dissociative. That I had deep fucking nightmares of my father’s cock so deep I didn’t even remember them until I started talking about my childhood. Those memories of a girl getting molested by her father was me! My brain was so broken I didn’t even know to be a human so it fragmented into DID and Schizoaffective. Had I brought up my gender issues before my dissociation, etc. I probably would have been manipulated by psycho doctors to takes shots and cut my tits off cause it will cure ALLL my deeply rooted issues with a deeper voice and face stubble.

I speak completely unbiased because I don’t give a fuck about any human’s feelings. I have seen things from just about every perspective. To me we are just another species on this planet. A toxic and now invasive species we are. I don’t believe in “rudeness” because it’s not one human’s responsible to be aware of everyone’s sensitivities at all times. Over breeding, not enough resources and destroying the literal things that gives us life.

Look at all those trees cut down for that new apartment complex for all those useless humans that will do the SAME exact thing as 472846261572827361 people who felt entitled to breed without any conscious thought of the long term consequences of the planet. We have no intention of sustaining. We are going to burn and burn and burn until we have burnt everything up. We are fucking robots with guts. 1/2 the fucking humans don’t have a personality except for jumping on a big band wagon (sports music internet), work all the time and have sex. We are taking up so much space and killing so many things for no reason.

Ironic how we kill dandelions but they do more good to the world in overpopulation than we do.

Ironic how we learned to communicate and build cool stuff and suddenly nothing else, even ourselves, matters.

I try so hard every day to live and be like you “normals” you political thinkers. But it didn’t even take me 15 years to realize that this government bullshit isn’t working AT ALL pretty much anywhere.. This earth does nothing but give and all you do is take. This Earth is working to death for us and we go out of our way to destroy it. I do not want to be apart of you. You have destroyed this planet, you all acknowledge it and do not care.

The human species is awful.

I don’t not love or hate them I simply do not care.

To me that means I am not bias. Or perhaps my only bias is that I have never in my entire existence met someone who thinks like me. Yet I’ve never met someone who has (actual) reason to hate my ideology.

I do not speak worrying if/who I will offend in the room. I do not care about telling people exactly why they are wrong.

I do believe there is a right and wrong answer for literally everything, perhaps there is more than one right answer, yes. But there is definitely wrong ones. It’s absolutely ignorant to ignore that ideas are wrong and encourage them for personal gain coughbrainsexcough.

The human species is selfish and tries its hardest to filter everything to everyone’s weaknesses. When in reality it’s only making us weaker. A kid who is unvaccinated and never exposed to the outside world is more likely to get sick than someone exposed to the true toxicity. To see the true toxicity is what will make us change. Sad but true. It always takes riots, violence, death and suffering for things to change. Things just can’t change they always have to hit rock bottom to prove they are bad bad. It’s gunna take 20 years when the HRT hormones end up being reverse chemo. Or when a gang of black men finally get sick of the fucking police brutality and walk into a police station and slaughters 20 cops. It will take a few 10 years olds getting raped in the target bathroom by dudes in dresses. It will take a bunch of schizophrenics and psychotics burning a hospital down with themselves inside to escape the staff abuse. Or a massive and overpopulated prison getting overthrown and they take over a whole town. Hell sometimes even the worst doesn’t work. If all these mass shootings meant anything to anyone theyd fix up our fucking mental health systems. Nah it will be a fucking gun war of course. It will be about POLITICS and not in 2019 kids are being FORCED to go to potential war zones for an education that doesn’t do them much fucking good anyway.

It always takes the worst.

The earth deserves better than us. Hell we deserve better than what we give ourselves. The Earth is more magical than you will ever begin to comprehend. You all preach about loving god but the very ground you walk on is the only “god” that has ever existed.

So fuck your safe spaces.....

Rot like you let this beautiful planet.