#and did you know that i cannot for the life of me find a compilation of her attacks on them?

[goyayato]

a list of cool website i found and use

radiooooo.com- pretty much you can listen to any music any place in the world and also... you can choose any TIME. Sometimes a person just likes to listen to russian music during the 1970s yk? (i recommend btw)

onelook.com (thesaurus)- can't seem to find the word you're thinking of? What the hell is that blanket that you only use for the couch/living area??? Oh wait- a throw. Go check out onelook, it has definitely saved me time for my writing.

datayze.com- CALLING ALL WRITERS, or i mean if youre gonna have a baby too ig this would work. datayze literally will help you find a name for your oc! And if you already have a name it gives you alot of good info you may want to know about your oc'c name. Or you could always make a name by mixing two together, like you can... on datatyze.

bandcamp.com- I cannot for the life me explain this website but TRY IT OUT, YALL. You can find alot of underground artists or new songs :D

mix.com- kind of like tumblr? but kind of like reddit? but also kind of like twitter? what im trying to say is that it's called mix for a reason. It takes cool things from multiple different websites and compiles it into one website, really cool when you're into a really specific fandom sometimes.

lab.nationalmedals.org- tbh idk, it's pretty and cool. it's pretty cool. i used to play this a lot.

worldchatclock.com- i use this for some of my friends that i volunteered with online to find a perfect time for us to meet. It finds a time where which you and up to a few people in different time zones can find a perfect meeting time.

earth.nullschool.net- so ive been getting back into flying my kite and this has been a life saver for my time.

radiogarden.com- i made a whole post about this website, uhh just look it up or try and find the post- im sorry im getting tired pLease

(I have like 2 other websites but i am not going to log into my old school email to try and find the bookmarked websites)

HONORABLE MENTION (actually i did this on purpose. best for last yk?)

azejournal.com- HELLO AROS AND ACES OR BOTH!! THIS IS THE WEBSITE FOR YOU. This is full of cool poems, stories, personal experiences, etc, about being aro or ace or both. I am literally in LOVE (no romo) with this website, it makes me feel more understood sometimes. Also I just love seeing us as a minority having a safe space to make and post creatively.

[neitherofusideal]

A compilation of my favorite hannigram quotes, related lines or conversations throughout the series.

— Uhm... Just because?

S01E01: Apéritif

Hannibal: "God forbid we become friendly."

Will: "I don't find you that interesting."

Hannibal: "You will."

S01E04: Oeuf

Hannibal: "Feeling paternal, Will?"

Will: "Aren't you?"

Hannibal: "Yes."

S01E09: Trou Normand

Hannibal (to Will): "Who knows Abigail better than you and I? All the burden she bears. We are her fathers now. We have to serve her better than Garrett Jacob Hobbs."

S02E01: Kaiseki

Hannibal: "I miss him."

Bedelia: "You are obsessed with Will Graham."

Hannibal: "I am intrigued."

Bedelia: "Obsessively."

S02E09: Shiizakana

Hannibal (to Will): "No one can be fully aware of another human being unless we love them. By that love we see potential in our beloved. Through that love, we allow our beloved to see their potential. Expressing that love, our beloved’s potential comes true. I love you, Will."

S02E10: Naka-Choko

Hannibal: "Stay with me."

Will: "Where else would I go?"

–/–

Alana: "It's just hard to know where you are with each other."

Will: "We know where we are with each other. Shouldn't that be enough?"

S02E12: Tome-wan

Will (to Hannibal): "You're right. We are just alike. You're as alone as I am. And we're both alone without each other."

–/–

Will (to Hannibal): "I bond with Abigail, you take her away. I bond with barely more than the idea of a child, you take it away. You saw to it that I alienated Alana, alienated Jack. You don't want me to have anything in my life that isn't you."

-/-

Hannibal: "Achilles lamenting the death of Patroclus. Whenever he's mentioned in the Iliad, Patroclus seems to be defined by his empathy."

Will: "He became Achilles on the field of war. He died for him there, wearing his armor."

Hannibal: "He did. Hiding and revealing identity is a constant theme throughout the Greek epics."

Will: "As are battle-tested friendships."

Hannibal: "Achilles wished all Greeks would die, so that he and Patroclus could conquer Troy alone. Took divine intervention to bring them down."

S02E13: Mizumono

Hannibal: "We could disappear now. Tonight. Feed your dogs, leave a note for Alana, and never see her or Jack again. Almost polite."

Will: "Then this would be our last supper."

Hannibal: "Of this life. I served lamb."

Will: "Sacrificial."

Hannibal: "I don't need a sacrifice, do you?"

–/–

Will: "You were supposed to leave."

Hannibal: "We couldn't leave without you."

...

Hannibal: "Time did reverse. The teacup that I shattered did come together. A place was made for Abigail in your world... You understand? A place was made for all of us, together. I wanted to surprise you. And you... you wanted to surprise me. I let you know me. See me. I gave you a rare gift. But you didn't want it."

Will: "Didn't I?"

...

Hannibal: "Do you believe you could change me, the way I've changed you?"

Will: "I already did."

Hannibal: "Fate and circumstance has returned us to this moment— when the teacup shatters. I forgive you, Will. Will you forgive me?"

S03E02: Primavera

Will: "A valentine written on a broken man."

–/–

Will: "I do feel closer to Hannibal here. God only knows where I'd be without him."

Abigail: "What did you see?"

Will: "He left us his broken heart."

Abigail: "How did he know we were here?"

Will: "He didn't. But he knew we'd come."

Abigail: "He misses us."

S03E03: Secondo

Hannibal: "He said he forgave me."

...

Bedelia: "Betrayal and forgiveness are best seen as something akin to falling in love."

Hannibal: "You cannot control with respect to whom you fall in love."

–/–

Chiyoh: "How do you know Hannibal?"

Will: "One could argue intimately."

Chiyoh: "'Nakama'? It's a Japanese word for very close friends."

Will: "Yes, we were 'nakama'."

–/–

Chiyoh: "Why are you looking for him after he left you with a smile?"

Will: "I've never known myself as well as I know myself when I'm with him."

–/–

Jack: “Will Graham understands Hannibal. He accepts him. Now, who among us doesn’t want understanding and acceptance?”

–/-

Bedelia: “What your sister made you feel was beyond your conscious ability to control or predict."

Hannibal: "Or negotiate."

Bedelia: "I would suggest what Will Graham makes you feel is not dissimilar. A force of mind and circumstance.”

Hannibal: “Love. He pays you a visit or he doesn't.”

S03E04: Aperitivo

Jack: "You remember when you decided to call Hannibal?"

Will: "I wasn't decided when I called him. I just called him. I deliberated while the phone rang. I decided when I heard his voice."

Jack: "You told him we knew."

Will: "I told him to leave. 'Cause I wanted him to run."

Jack: "Why?"

Will: "Because... because he was my friend. And because I wanted to run away with him."

–/–

Dr. Chilton: "Will Graham is alive because Hannibal Lecter likes him that way."

Jack: "Maybe it's one of those friendships that ends after the disemboweling."

Dr. Chilton: "I would argue, with these two, that's tantamount to flirtation."

S03E06: Dolce

Jack: "Hannibal will slip away. Will you slip away with him?"

Will: "Part of me will always want to."

–/–

Hannibal: "If I saw you everyday, forever, Will, I would remember this time."

Will: "Strange seeing you here in front of me. Been staring at afterimages of you in places you haven't been in years."

...

Will: "I wanted to understand you... before I laid eyes on you again. I needed it to be... clear. What I was seeing."

Hannibal: "Where does the difference between the past and the future come from?"

Will: "Mine?"... "Before you and after you."

...

Will: "You and I... have begun to blur."

Hannibal: "Isn't that how you found me?"

Will: "Every crime of yours, feels like one I'm guilty of. Not just Abigail's murder, every murder. Stretching backward and forward in time."

Hannibal: "Freeing yourself from me and me freeing myself from you. They're the same."

Will: "We're conjoined. I'm curious whether either of us can survive separation."

–/–

Hannibal: "I would've liked to show you Florence, Will."

S03E07: Digestivo

Hannibal: "Do we talk about teacups and time, and the rules of the disorder?"

Will: "The teacup's broken. It's never gonna gather itself back together again."

Hannibal: "Not even in your mind?"... "Your memory palace is building, it's full of new things. It shares some rooms with my own. I've discovered you there, victorious."

Will: "When it comes to you and me, there can be no decisive victory."

Hannibal: "We are a zero-sum game?"

Will: "I miss my dogs. I'm not going to miss you. I'm not going to find you. I'm not going to look for you. I don't want to know where you are or what you do. I don't want to think about you anymore."

Hannibal: "You delight in wickedness and then berate yourself for the delight."

Will: "You delight. I tolerate... I don't have your appetite."

Will: "Goodbye, Hannibal."

–/–

Hannibal (to Will): "I want you to know exactly where I am, or where you can always find me."

S03E09: ...and the Woman Clothed with the Sun

Hannibal: "Is there a child in your life, Will? I gave you a child, if you recall."

–/–

Will: "You called us "murder husbands.""

Freddie Lounds: "You did run off to Europe together."

S03E10: ...and the Woman Clothed in Sun

Bedelia: "Have you been to see him?"

Will: "Yes."

Bedelia: "You haven't learned your lesson have you? Or did you just miss him that much?"

–/–

Bedelia (to Will): "My relationship with Hannibal isn't as passionate as yours. You are here visiting an old flame. Is your wife aware how intimately you and Hannibal know each other?"

S03E11: ...and the Beast from the Sea

Will (to Hannibal): "I'm not fortune's fool. I'm yours."

S03E12: The Number of the Beast is 666

Will: "Is Hannibal... in love with me?"

Bedelia: "Could he daily feel a stab of hunger for you and find nourishment at the very sight of you?... Yes. But do you ache for him?"

S03E13: The Wrath of the Lamb

Hannibal: "When life becomes maddeningly polite, think about me. Think about me, Will. Don't worry about me."

–/–

Will: "I knew you wanted me to know exactly where I could find you when I needed to."

Hannibal: "And you did."

Will: "I need you Hannibal." ... "Please."

–/–

Will: "It really does look black in the moonlight."

Hannibal: "See? This is all I ever wanted for you, Will. For both of us."

Will: "It's beautiful."

[huellitaa]

reset, recharge, rewind!! ⊹˚. ♡

──★ ˙ ̟🎀 reasons we need recharge days

reduced likelihood of future mental health crises

improves your mental, physical, and overall health

to avoid burnouts

feel more empowered, capable, resilient and able to bounce back from hardships

boosts your productivity and overall executive function

more hours worked ≠ productivity !!!

the same as our physical bodies need rest and recovery by sleep, our mental states need rest and recovery too sometimes. the healthiest and most successful people are the ones who take the time to care for themselves first. you should always always always be your top priority, no matter what happens. <3

you cannot pour from an empty cup. you cannot burn if you've dwindled down the flame. you cannot be a pearl if there is no oyster.

──★ ˙ ̟🎀 when is it time for a mental health day and to take the time to recharge?

when you feel yourself in a repeated pattern of irritability or negative emotions in your school or workplace

when you find yourself more unable to focus and distracted more easily

when you are seriously lacking sleep

when you find yourself falling back into old habits

reset days sound great in theory, but how exactly does one execute them in a way that leaves them feeling refreshed and recharged for the future?

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 1. what leaves you energised?

if you haven't already made one, i'd highly recommend making a list of things that make you happy, have a good day, energised, relaxed, refreshed, etc, and a list of things that do the opposite. this is then so you can figure out what does and doesn't make you happy, give you energy, and so on, and figure out what to indulge in and what to avoid to keep yourself not burnt out and working harder for longer instead of overworking yourself.

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 2. detox!

detoxing from everything is a perfect thing to do on a recharge day. whenever i detox i feel like a brand new girl and so clean and fresh, and i have a post on this here 🫶💗 even if you aren't feeling particularly down or if nothing has happened and you just decide to take a random recharge day to boost your energy, detoxing and pampering urself is always always always the way to go! <3

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 3. journal, obviously

as the no.1 girl journalling advocate of course i had to put this in here. i have a whole pinterest board full of these for when i need them and have specific prompts for specific emotions (should i make a post on this?) and it helps me so much. think of it like you're having an interview with yourself and a look into your own emotions so that you can get to know yourself and your circumstances better for future reference, too.

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 4. errands

as much as i hate to admit and as hard as it is, compiling a list of all the things that have been on your mind and that you've been procrastinating and getting them done in a time period throughout the day when you feel comfortable can be very helpful for lifting the metaphorical and emotional weight off of your shoulders. knowing you have time to just relax for a little while and that you've gotten everything you need to do done already is a massive relief for me and the feeling of utter refreshment that comes with having a clean slate with nothing nagging at you in the back of your mind is priceless.

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 5. detective work: analysis!

along with the journalling, if your recharge day was brought on by a series of negativity in your life, i think it especially helps to analyse the period of time leading up to said recharge day and think ab what made you feel like you need some time off to recharge. did anything happen, were there any events that could have triggered it, big or small, how you felt, and so on; write it all down or just lay and think about it quietly and think about how you can tackle it in future and come up with a way to deal with that. reset days are the perfect time to learn from ur mistakes and ensure that you can know what to do if and when they strike again in the future.

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 6. self-respect

most importantly, please respect the fact that you are only human and need ur rest. it's not your fault for getting overwhelmed or needing to take a day to rest. as long as you are doing the best you can, you're going exactly the pace you need to, and you are at the exact place you need to be, whether it feels like it or not. not constantly working does not mean you have failed, does not mean that you are weak, or anything like that. please take care of yourself and have enough self-respect to honour your own needs and emotions. you're doing amazing bae 💗✨

──★ ˙ ̟🎀 journal prompts:

๋࣭♡ has there been any possible events or recent situations that may have caused a mental health spiral?

๋࣭♡ do any of these events link back to an event that affected you in the past?

๋๋♡ what are some things you dislike right now in your life?

๋࣭♡ how do they make you feel and why?

( also see: girly girl's guide to journalling and ultimate journalling index)

all my love 🫶💗🎀

[everybodyhatesmiddleschool]

It has been six excruciating days since I was plunged into the Bridgerton fandom against my will.

I was minding my own business, watching YouTube compilations of the best kisses in TV history, when I unwittingly clicked on a video about Colin and Penelope, and I was immediately down so bad for them.

Let me be clear: Bridgerton was not part of my life before I clicked on that video. I wanted nothing to do with it; I had no intention of ever watching or reading that smut. And then, without warning, it swept in and took me in the night, much like Colin Bridgerton in the back of a carriage.

To say I have been lost in the sauce these past six days would be a gross understatement. The carriage scene is literally ruining my life. I haven’t gone to sleep before 1 a.m. since Sunday, and I have been over an hour late to work every day. Why? Because I cannot stop consuming that godforsaken scene — watching gifs of it over and over, reading y’all’s hilarious takes and memes about it, watching it with the audio descriptions turned on (🥵), watching it with the music removed (🥵🥵), watching Luke and Nicola on their press tour, watching, watching, watching.

Have I started actually watching season 1 of the show? Of course. Did I check out the large-print version of the first book from the library since it was the only copy available? You bet. But I do not care about these other characters and storylines. I want it to be Colin and Penelope on the screen and the page in every sentence and every scene.

And either fortunately or unfortunately, I don’t even have to be looking at a screen to be distracted by them — my daydreaming has never been as maladaptive in my life as it has been this week. I can hardly think of one ten-minute stretch in the past six days in which some imaginary scenario has not been taking over my brain. I want to be part of their world so bad — not just Bridgerton, but Shondaland. As is the case for 90% of all of my daydreams, I want these actors to know I exist. I want them to look at me with just as much awe and love as I look at them. So I might be staring at my computer screen in my cubicle, but in my mind, I’m on a press tour of my own that intersects with theirs. (I’m never the desperate fan with no life in my dreams; my idols always see me as their equal). I might be driving my commute in my car, but in my mind, they’re congratulating me about my own novel being optioned by Netflix. I might be brushing my teeth in my bathroom, but in my mind, we’re laughing together on Graham Norton’s couch.

But Lord, here comes that freaking carriage scene once again, inserting itself into my mind (pun unavoidable). I cannot get over it. I’m so stuck there that I’ve found myself wearing shoes I don’t remember putting on, carrying coffee mugs I don’t remember putting in my bag, driving a speed limit I don’t remember agreeing to as acceptable. There is laundry that needs to be folded. Bills need to be paid. Emails need to be deleted en masse without reading. But I can’t find the door that will let me out of this damn carriage.

I had a conversation with myself two days ago about how we might be able to adapt to this new living situation. After a few temper tantrums, I finally said, “Girl, if you’re going to watch this scene 1,000 times, you have got to find a way to make it a constructive part of your life.” So I did what any rational adult would do: I started writing a scholarly paper about why it’s so powerful — not just for me but, according to the internet, for a lot of women. And I have every intention of writing an entire paper about this … if I can find the time. I’m just so busy right now with consuming this damn scene.

Was starting to write that article enough to satiate my obsession with this scene, with this show and these actors? Of course not. So this morning, I started writing a spicy scene of my own, featuring not Colin and Penelope but two other vaguely outlined characters who I’m sure I’ll give names and personalities to later. I was literally sitting in my cubicle, hunched over my planner, writing down snippets of sexiness in as small a print as possible in case someone walked up on me and looked over my shoulder without me noticing. And I’m not gonna lie: this shit’s good. I’ve never written smut before, because I’ve never had enough spice in my own life to feel like I’d be able to do it justice on paper. But that imagination of mine — she’s a freak. And my mind? My mind has moved way past the gutter. It is now in the outhouse. It’s in the slop with the pigs.

It should have come as no surprise, but as usual, the act of actually writing down the jumble of mess in my brain has had the effect of breaking some of the spell. I was also forced to focus on work because of looming deadlines, and I currently feel calmer than I have since Sunday. But I am truly living in fear of June 13. I cannot go through this again, and I know that I’m bound to, because I know that what’s been shown so far won’t hold a candle to what’s coming. And if I get down bad any further, I will be deep enough in the ground for this to become my final resting place. I’m not ready to be buried, but it feels inevitable.

But somehow, despite my own wants and fears, and despite the fact that we haven’t even been introduced yet to the bedroom where Colin and Penelope are sure to end up, I am somehow already lurking from behind the window curtains in the corner, peeking out at them doing the deed. I know what I hope I’ll see: based on the excerpt I’ve seen from the book, they will be in front of a mirror — expressly because Colin wants Penelope to see herself in full for the glorious goddess she is, and she will look at her sexy, bare self with just as much pride and love as we viewers behind the screen will (but probably with slightly less lust than Colin, who I pray will be very loud about how hot she is).

I am dreaming about this scene, but I dread it. Because if it’s as good as the carriage scene, I will immediately be re-enscripted and sent right back to the trenches where I spent the last six days. I’m excited, but I’m scared. And I’m afraid of getting lost in the woods again, because I know that if I do, I won’t want to be found.

[shaisuki]

THINK TWICE BEFORE YOU FLIRT WITH MY GIRL (various)

ᝰ.ᐟ think twice before you flirt with a sweet looking thing. you will never know what kind of disaster is coming for you.

SAY MY NAME (various)

ᝰ.ᐟ falling asleep is nothing but when you say their name while asleep things change.

HIDDEN INTENTIONS (nanami kento)

ᝰ.ᐟ nobody knew what's going on inside his head.

THE STRONGEST: A SERIES (gojo satoru)

ᝰ.ᐟ a compilation of drabbles featuring the great gojo satoru. ranging from steamy scenes to teeth-rotting fluff to the most angsty scenes.

IS THIS WHAT LOVE FEELS LIKE? (various)

ᝰ.ᐟ ahh, young love it is.

HOME IS WHERE YOU ARE: A SERIES (toji fushiguro)

ᝰ.ᐟ a short series of drabbles featuring toji and his chubby wife and baby megumi.

ME, SATORU AND OUR ADOPTED KIDS: A SERIES (gojo satoru)

ᝰ.ᐟ a compilation of drabbles featuring gojo and the fushiguro siblings as they make way of their new and chaotic ways of living.

MY HUSBAND'S BEST FRIEND (geto suguru)

ᝰ.ᐟ a happy life with your husband suguru and with your twins, what could you wished for, not until your husband's best friend took the form of the green-eyed monster.

WHAT DO YOU NEED, BABY? (gojo satoru)

ᝰ.ᐟ your husband is more than willing to provide what you need.

SSSH, DON'T CRY (itadori & gojo)

ᝰ.ᐟ they always unintentionally made you cry.

GODSEND TO HIM, A SIN FOR THE OTHER (geto suguru)

ᝰ.ᐟ for every mistake, punishment takes place.

PIECE BY PIECE (geto suguru)

ᝰ.ᐟ it may took too long but suguru is determined you will never experience the same pain again.

BLOOD FOR BLOOD (choso kamo)

ᝰ.ᐟ as revenge choso decided to kill you but what happens when the scent of your blood does something inevitable to him?

NOT YOUR FAULT (various)

ᝰ.ᐟ after a terrible feeling of guilt, they just know how to comfort you.

WHY WOULD YOU LEAVE ME, DARLING? (various)

ᝰ.ᐟ they have given more what you needed and provided for you and yet, it's not enough. why would you dare leave them when all they had is the "love" they have for you.

GREAT PRETENDER (itadori yuuji)

ᝰ.ᐟ you should have never played fire if you can't face the repurcussions.

GETTING COMFY, ARE WE? (various)

ᝰ.ᐟ you could be so affectionate with them if you want, it would be adorable if you would just forget what they did to you.

POSITIVE TEST RESULTS (various)

ᝰ.ᐟ a baby! the excitement and the incomprehensible joy they felt when they are expecting from you. a blessing or a curse? anyways, no matter what it is to keep you in place with them.

BRUISES AND DEAD BODIES (various)

ᝰ.ᐟ there's lines that cannot be crossed with them and involving you is a dumb way to die.

SON, YOUR GIRLFRIEND IS CUTE. MIND IF I HAVE A TASTE? (toji fushiguro)

ᝰ.ᐟ in which toji couldn't help but to steal a taste of his son's girlfriend. hope he doesn't find out. poor megumi.

[lintubintu]

Kot Kot Review

I like Kot Kot a lot.

Despite the almost harsh difference between the intro and how the song progresses, it´s not too out there.

The music seems chaotic and structured, is melodic, nostalgic and two-faced more out of necessity than provocation, and it´s ongoing. It spirals.

There is a lovely moodiness to it that seems mature and balanced, deliberately using the intro as a bridge again and repurposing the funky "kot kot" into something that softens into the lighter part of the song. The change of pace is noticeable but not alarming and almost hopeful.

Kot Kot is not a big song nor does it exist to troll. It enjoys being silly with the chicken theme and builds a narrative that can be purposely misunderstood by people who don´t like him.

During my first listen I was a little confused but intrigued by the seemingly contradicting parts that adapt well by the second listen. Pop and Rap evolve from clashing into shaking hands.

It feels a bit like a song nobody would put on an album anymore because it is deemed barely good enough to keep up with its fellow, more popular tunes. It stands on its own where others see a filler track.

Overall, it makes me have more hope for the album now; for it to be an album and not just a compilation of Singles.

I wouldn´t be surprised if this song was the opening number, nor would I be shocked to not find an Intro at all – Kot Kot is an introduction in itself.

From what I understand of the lyrics, it also is the first song of his that makes me want to know more about him as a lyricist.

To start the song of with MAYDAY is a deliberate choice because the song is not what it seems.

It´s soft spoken and not a shrill cry for help but knows of something that already affects the narrator enough that reaching out soon is imminent. It´s a literal stress signal.

The teaser made me think the protagonist in this song was simply sick of being treated like someone doomed to continue staging a party for others.

Relying on translations and interpretations of this song, the protagonist seems to realise that their lifestyle will rather leave them with very little time spent having fun with friends – because even the party-goers have gone to bed earlier than them.

Those that tried to keep up with them may have lost their step and had to give in to their own different schedules, or are worse off for keeping them company. So their company diminishes further.

There might be little life beyond the lifestyle, the sobering thought that solitude is too close within reach for comfort – the time left after work cannot always be shared nor of quality due to their schedule.

A double blow. Real life and bonding has to be spent in time confetti. Throughout it all, the silliness persists.

Rather laughable is the Explicit rating of this song. Was it the Perhana!?

The ending is a jumpscare, them finally being silly, breaking the cycle. But at the same time, it´s a rooster greeting the morning – the protagonist worked the night away.

For a moment, you are relieved the song is over. And then you play it again.

I would love for the upcoming album to be a concept album.

This song seems to divide people in a different way than songs before it did.

Some of you seem puzzled, others more neutral than hateful, none of the dislike so far is really loud.

The timing might be a bit unfortunate – song releases at this hour have the same problems as the protagonist in Kot Kot.

And even if you really don´t like this song, I fell that there will be something on the album that you will like.

It´s ok to not like things and it doesn´t have to be justified.

Still, I am interested to hear what you don´t like about this song because I think it makes for a worthwhile conversation and I like interacting with you.

Let´s do that while we have the time.

[replicabetweenblogs]

FIRST POST-HIATUS WRITING UPDATE WOOHOOO. ALSO I NEED Y'ALLS HELP.

30.12.2024 // this is not a chapter update yet! As promised before, an update to reveal what I have been up to regarding RBU.

;-; catching up on age old asks that got thrown into my inbox while I was away on hiatus and. Yes- always made me smile reading those, but also made me quite sad for leaving the story at such a cliffhanger.

All the people hoping for a happy ending with the ROs do make me giggle- all those people pointing out all the angst make me feel quite evil for the stuff I have written down in chapter 9 already. ANYWAY!! the update!

A few lill snippets because why not.

over the past years of total and utter silence with this project gone through a never-ending hiatus, I have gotten alotta more confident(yay) yet no-where to put these skills of mine into, as my struggle in real life right now is the fact that I can’t find a proper game design job where I can flourish - I decided to try and keep said skills sharp and fresh by writing stories. so here we are again. I have been quite busy rewriting and re-defining the overarching story, and I cannot wait to have everyone see the eventual endings.

Kept it all hush hush not wanting to come back with nothing- hence the ask compilation above c:<

the chapter is going to be a BIG one. I am at 91k words, fully written out and basically done aside from one (1) path remaining. WOOHOOOO NEARLY THERE :D running towards the finish line, hence the teaser. Anyway --

FEEDBACK FORM, TEASER, REQUEST FOR EDITOR UNDER CUT!

***Feedback form! Help me reach the finish line!!***

I need your help c: for anyone who still has their saves or new players who have reached the end of chapter 8, I like to know what your stats are! I require this for proper balancing in chapter 9 as this is the chapter where the story gets split into many paths depending on some of those questions. Thank you in advance!!

what can you expect from the next update, coming up SOON?

91k wordcount so far (total, all branches, excluding code)

19k words for one single run

Romance lock-ins with Ash and Ha

consequences of your past major decisions/Character personality traits starting to finally catch up by taking the players onto whole different branches and locations altogether.

trigger warnings: implied mental and physical torture, determined character deaths

Some additional flashback sequences across chapters 6, 7 and 8 to some see things from companions' povs

The story of RBU is dark. this game has a dozen "bad" endings planned, only having one "good" ending for each individual Character/MC and main story in general. It's not for just the sake of drama and shock value, as I want this game to reach a very specific "lesson" which effect will be taken away if everything ended in a too-good-to-be-true way. Just a gentle warning!

main story lock-in!! Coded out some branches already for the next chapters. Chapter 10 will be the end of part 2, and part 3 will be more of a 2-chapter endgame with a chapter dedicated to an epilogue afterward. So we are really getting close to the end if I keep this up, and will stop updating the public link once reaching part 3. Will be making an announcement for private betas by then probably, but that'd be like... when I am on my deathbed at the age of 92, most likely.

I really hope you guys will be enjoying the absurdly long chapter. Did a few bold moves regarding the direction the story is going towards which I had been planning and iterating for since the very start of RBU regarding final revelations, hoping some puzzle pieces will be satisfyingly falling into place.

RBU is really about regret and acceptance regarding our decisions and mistakes, and how different types of people deal with it (badly).. so there are no "good" or "bad" endings or choices, really. BUT there is always a "worse" and "worst" so uh. Beware :')

Looking for a paid/voluntary editor!!

To help with the reconstruction of weird sentences, taking out grammar mistakes, eliminating the bad spelling, and bonking teenage-firefly on the head for her bad storytelling. plus points if you could help with the phasing even, perhaps like some kind of a beta reader- yet not too focused on it right now, as I'm just wanting to make the old chapters flow nicer.

shoot me a message if you are wanting to help out! Either on the forums, over here, or shoot me a DM! as I am @fireflyy on the official COG discord server.

For the sake of consistency, I am hoping to get help from one available editor for now. so please do let me know of your experiences if you are wanting to help out!!

You shall be credited within RBU's main screen

See you all soon <3 and a happy new year!!

[kugelblitzzed]

my small ramble about HABIT as a character :

warnings : spoilers! content warning for csa, sa, nazism, etc. HABIT is not a good person, bear this is mind.

obviously, I don't support HABIT as a person. for those unaware, he's mentioned multiple times to have been an SS soldier, a raper, obviously a serial murderer, etc. he is NOT a good person.

however, his character has got to be one of my most favorite written in existence.

because we know absolutely nothing about him.

and he knows that.

he reveals just enough information about himself to the audience for us to get comfortable enough to think we can predict him, and then proceeds to go in the exact opposite direction. he is the joker, the wild card, after all.

one prime example of this. I watch a lot of emh fan content so I've seen a bunch of these YouTube compilations of "HABIT acting like a human for _ minutes" or "HABIT acting animalistic" and so forth.

we have absolutely no fucking idea what HABIT is. obviously, he is a representation of pure evil, presumably human. he is human in nature, though obviously deranged. yet he is so evil that he becomes a feral kind of animalistic insane. he growls, bites, runs on all fours. whilst obviously taking a human form, we still don't know just exactly what his is.

this next small section (adding on to the former) is a bit of a ramble. I have not finished the series, I'm watching it in real time. this is moreso speculation, so forgive me for any incorrect guesses.

HABIT is obviously the sender of the treasure chest containing the everyman play. you know the one, with extra characters and annotations added in. HABIT adds in firebrand, the guardian and the voyeur. yet, as far as I'm guessing, he isn't any of these characters, and obviously he cannot be one of the characters already in the play (unless he's death himself.)

he knows. he controls the strings everytime. he writes in the characters, he writes in what they will do and how they will act and interact with one another. he's akin to a god. so much so, that he doesn't even take a form in the great play of life. did he insert himself, force his way in?

we have no idea.

additionally, we don't know what his capabilities as an entity are. the point established is that HABIT is trying to find the perfect vessel with little regard to the body he's hurting in the process.

yet, the way he's presented, you'd think he does it spontaneously. you'd think he jumps between bodies whenever he pleases, and if it isn't immediately to his liking he just inflicts some kind of life-threatening damage and leaves. again, we know this not to be the case.

for those unaware, Nick is possessed by HABIT. in the CANYOUSEETHEWORDS blog, once HABIT takes over, he begins to insert diary extracts and exerts from his victims. maybe to mock them, or maybe he has some higher plan.

in one of these, we see Nick. if you hadn't seen the extract, one would've assumed HABIT just stole his body temporarily since the only time we actually see Nick get possessed is when he's choking out Evan, before HABIT kills the guy himself (through Evan's body.) yet, in the entry, Nick expresses that HABIT literally is a higher being.

Nick discovers he was a product of rape. and the perpetrator? HABIT.

HABIT had to have actively had some knowledge of every single event in the timeline just to know "the child of this woman is going to be my vessel." but, if he has such time warping knowledge, why doesn't he just look through time and find the best one?

we don't know either. maybe he hunts for the fun of it.

thanks for reading my small ramble about how well written HABIT is.

[dragonsdendoodles]

What do you think the children would watch on YouTube? What would their favorite youtubers and content be?

Oh god time to just scream my age on the internet

Also for the record if any of these people are problematic I don’t know about it or what happened my entire YouTube feed for the past six years has been Reddit stories and video essays I use for background noise when I draw so if I mention someone sucky I’m sorry I haven’t consumed their content since at least middle school

For starters, I think Emma, Millard, and Horace avoid it altogether out of principle. Emma and Horace because people are stupid and they cannot believe this is what modern entertainment is and Millard because he has ruined many videos by pointing out every inaccuracy he could find and he got sick of the cesspool of misinformation that is the internet.

Jacob has been watching Minecraft videos since the beginning of the damn site. Specifically he discovered iHasCupquake and DanTDM a couple years after joining the loop and now when he’s bored and in a time with internet access he watches Minecraft Oasis and DanTDM’s Custom Mod Adventures on repeat. Noor is the exact same way, but with life hack videos very obviously aimed at middle school girls that have stuff like painting staples with nail polish and sneaking candy into class via empty glue sticks. Think Wengie and SaraBeautyCorner. They actually grew up with this so it’s more about the nostalgia than anything else

Enoch likes history videos. And videos about games like War Thunder and World of Tanks. He also likes Vine compilations, discovered when Jacob and Noor were quoting vines to each other and Enoch joined with them having absolutely zero knowledge he even knew what that was. (Horace also begrudgingly knows what Vine was, but instead of saying “yeah I sure hope it does” to Enoch’s “road work ahead???” he goes “I hate you and everything you stand for” and Enoch laughs.)

Olive, Claire, and Bronwyn watch Gacha Life/Club/whatever the fuck they’re on now I don’t know anymore music videos and Vine compilations. Bronwyn is here for quality control. (Bronwyn’s favorite YouTube series is Rosanna Pansino’s Nerdy Nummies series, even though she has no idea what any of the references are. What she does know is that she showed Jacob the Angry Birds cupcakes and he demanded they be made that exact day.)

Hugh is fascinated by all this but has little to no idea what’s going on. He did however get very invested in Sanders Sides and is very impatiently waiting with me for Orange to be revealed.

Fiona also doesn’t know what’s going on but she thinks Warrior Cats AMVs and multi-animator projects are INSANE she loves them and gets very sad when Noor is helping her look them up and they find out yet another creator is problematic

[calliesmemes]

THE PAST ON STAGE IN SCRIPT AND SONG

A COMPILATION OF LYRICS AND QUOTATIONS FROM VARIOUS STAGE PRODUCTIONS WITH HISTORICAL SETTINGS OR STORYLINES.

CHANGE gendered words and in-universe phrases as needed.

SPECIFY muse for multimuses.

I. HAMILTON

“   He looked at me like I was stupid, I’m not stupid.   ”

“   Talk less; smile more.   ”

“   If you stand for nothing, what will you fall for?   ”

“   I imagine death so much it feels just like a memory.   ”

“   I will lay down my life if it sets us free.   ”

“   You want a revolution? I want a revelation.   ”

“   Chaos and bloodshed are not a solution.   ”

“   It’s hard to listen to you with a straight face.   ”

“   You’ll remember you belong to me.   ”

“   When push comes to shove, I will kill your friends and family to remind you of my love.   ”

“   Have I done something wrong?   ”

“   Dying is easy; living is harder.   ”

“   But what do we have in common?   ”

“   I’m about to change your life.   ”

“   I will never understand you.   ”

“   Don’t do a thing. History will prove him wrong.   ”

“   I can’t disobey direct orders.   ”

“   History has its eyes on you.   ”

“   Why do you assume you’re the smartest in the room?   ”

“   They are asking me to lead. I am doing the best I can.   ”

“   I’ve nowhere else to turn.   ”

“   Turn around, bend over; I’ll show you where my shoe fits!   ”

“   Every action has an equal opposite reaction.   ”

“   Try not to crack under the stress.   ”

“   This prick is asking for someone to bring him to task!   ”

“   See how he lies?   ”

“   You can finally speak your mind!   ”

“   They will tear him into pieces!   ”

“   As long as he can hold a pen, he’s a threat.   ”

“   This is the only way I can protect my legacy.   ”

“   That’s one less thing to worry about.   ”

“   I came as soon as I heard.   ”

“   I will choose her happiness over mine every time.   ”

“   Be careful with that one; he will do what it takes to survive.   ”

“   I’m erasing myself from the narrative.   ”

“   You forfeit all rights to my heart.   ”

“   I hope that you burn.   ”

“   This man has poisoned my political pursuits!   ”

“   Your last chance to negotiate.   ”

“   It's him or me, the world will never be the same.   ”

“   This man will not make an orphan of my daughter!   ”

“   Legacy, what is a legacy?   ”

“   Teach me how to say goodbye.   ”

“   History obliterates, in every picture it paints.   ”

“   I survived, but I paid for it.   ”

“   You have no control over who lives, who dies, who tells your story.   ”

“   Can I show you what I’m proudest of?   ”

“   Oh, I can’t wait to see you again.   ”

II. THE PHANTOM OF THE OPERA

“   Please promise me you’ll try.   ”

“   Where in the world have you been hiding?   ”

“   You did well. He will be pleased.   ”

“   It frightens me.   ”

“   Don’t be frightened.   ”

“   Insolent boy!   ”

“   My power over you grows stronger yet.   ”

“   Now you cannot ever be free!   ”

“   So, it is to be war between us!   ”

“   We'll be safe there.   ”

“   I can't escape from him . . . I never will . . .   ”

“   Don't take me back there!   ”

“   All I want is freedom.   ”

“   I'm here, nothing can harm you.   ”

“   You’re safe; no one will find you.   ”

“   Say you’ll share with me one love, one lifetime.   ”

“   Anywhere you go, let me go too.   ”

“   I don’t want any part in this plot!   ”

“   If he finds me, it won’t ever end.   ”

“   Every hope and every prayer rests on you now.   ”

“   You've already succumbed to me.   ”

“   No second thoughts, you've decided.   ”

“   I had rather hoped that you would come.    ”

III. ANASTASIA

“   Wherever I go, you’ll always be with me. ”

“   Do you believe in fairytales? ”

“   It’s risky, but not more than usual. ”

“   I don’t know a thing before that. ”

“   You don’t know what it’s like not to know who you are. ”

“   I see flashes of fire, and hear the echoes of screams. ”

“   We’ve lots and lots to teach you, and the time is going fast. ”

“   Pull yourself together, and you’ll pull through it! ”

“   I don’t like being contradicted! ”

“   You have courage and strength you barely know. ”

“   They would kill you without hesitation. ”

“   Everyone imagines being someone else; I’m no different. ”

“   Be very careful what you say. ”

“   I heard the screams, but it’s the silence after that I remember most. ”

“   I believe he did a proud and vital task. ”

“   A revolution is a simple thing. ”

“   Your eyes. A man could look right into them. ”

“   Want to see what else I can do? ”

“   My father used to bring me here. ”

“   I’m not as strong as you think I am. ”

“   You were the only hope I had. ”

“   You’re the stubbornest person I’ve ever met! ”

“   Get a grip and take a deep breath. ”

“   We’ll be safe soon. ”

“   You put these ideas in my head. I’m beginning to think that they might be true. ”

“   You are all I know; you have raised me. ”

“   We’ll find them, never fear. ”

“   She’s nothing but a child. ”

“   I feel a strange connection I can’t allow. ”

“   I am nothing but a man, with nothing but his orders to fulfill. ”

“   Are you ready to be astonished? ”

“   If only I could lose hope entirely. ”

“   I won’t let you give up. ”

“   We are going to change history. ”

“   The voices keep coming back! ”

“   I began to wonder if you were ever going to pay me a compliment. ”

“   Do not come any closer! ”

“   I do not need reminding of what happened to my family! ”

“   I’m old and impatient. Kindness has become a luxury. ”

“   You’re clever. I’ll grant you that. ”

“   I have found solace in my bitterness. ”

“   Do you know what it means to lose everything? ”

“   It’s never too late to come home. ”

“   Do you think history wants you to have lived? ”

“   I am my father’s daughter. ”

“   I am my father’s son! ”

“   Be careful what a dream may bring! ”

IV. LES MISÉRABLES

“   I’ve done no wrong.   ”

“   You’re standing in your grave.   ”

“   They've all forgotten you.   ”

“   Your time is up.   ”

“   Do not forget my name.   ”

“   In their eyes I see their fear.   ”

“   Freedom is mine.   ”

“   You broke the law.   ”

“   Now every door is closed to me.   ”

“   What we have, we have to share   ”

“   Rest from pain, and rest from wrong.   ”

“   I commend you for your duty.   ”

“   My life was a war that could never be won.   ”

“   I feel my shame inside me like a knife   ”

“   Another story must begin.   ”

“   Cheer up dearie, show a happy face.   ”

“   I’ll kill you, you bastard.   ”

“   If I stay silent, I am damned.   ”

“   I swear to you, I will be there.   ”

“   Crying at all is not allowed.   ”

“   Like mother, like daughter.   ”

“   Please do not send me out there alone.   ”

“   I used to dream that I would meet a prince.   ”

“   There are treacherous people about.   ”

“   Don’t judge a girl on how she looks.   ”

“   The time is near.   ”

“   It is better than an opera!   ”

“   It is time for us all to decide who we are.   ”

“   Have you asked of yourself what’s the price you might pay?   ”

“   What was right seems wrong, and what was wrong seems right.   ”

“   Who cares about your lonely soul?   ”

“   How can I live when we are parted?   ”

“   My place is here, I fight with you!   ”

“   You're here, that's all I need to know   ”

“   Just hold me now, and let it be.   ”

“   Though we may not all survive here, there are things that never die.   ”

“   Come; time is running short.   ”

“   I am the law and the law is not mocked!   ”

“   Vengeance was his, and he gave me back my life.   ”

“   There is nothing on earth that we share.   ”

“   He gave me my life. He gave me freedom.   ”

“   I should have perished by his hand.   ”

“   Must I now begin to doubt what never doubted all those years?   ”

“   My heart is stone and still it trembles.   ”

V. 1776

“   There you are!   ”

“   What in the hell are you all waiting for?   ”

“   Oh, good god.   ”

“   I’ve had enough of you!   ”

“   Can’t we compromise here?   ”

“   Will someone shut that man up?   ”

“   It’s all quite simple, really.   ”

“   Have you done as I asked?   ”

“   I’m afraid we have a more urgent problem.   ”

“   Damn it; this is no time for playing games!   ”

“   Why don’t you give it up? Nobody listens to you.   ”

“   You’re obnoxious and disliked.   ”

“   What new intrigue are you cooking up?   ”

“   That was the most revolting display I have ever witnessed.   ”

“   It’s traditional. Even more, it is historical.   ”

“   I wonder if I might speak to you for a moment in private.   ”

“   How can anyone see you if you insist in standing in his shadow?   ”

“   Your voice is hurting my foot.   ”

“   What are you staring at? Haven’t you ever seen a great man before?   ”

“   I’m not certain whether representing the people means relying on their judgement or on my own.   ”

“   There’s a question I’ve been fairly itching to ask you.   ”

“   I’ve never seen, heard, nor smelled an issue that was so dangerous it couldn’t be talked about.   ”

“   You are merely an agitator, disturbing the peace, creating disorder, endangering the public welfare!   ”

“   Don’t let him deceive you!   ”

“   Why the long face?   ”

“   I have objections — I have lots of objections!   ”

“   What is all that racket?   ”

“   Do you mean to say that it is not yet finished?   ”

“   I’ve forgotten the feel of your hand.    ”

“   I am, as I ever was and ever shall be, yours.   ”

“   Excuse me, madam, but we met last evening.   ”

“   I won’t appear in the history books anyway.   ”

“   All right, enough socializing. There’s work to be done.   ”

“   When they hang you, perhaps you’ll put in a good word for the rest of us?   ”

“   If I thought that we could win this war, I’d be at the front of your ranks.   ”

“   What we do we do rationally.   ”

“   Why begin, until we know that we can win?   ”

“   If we cannot win, why bother to begin?   ”

“   Most men with nothing would rather protect the possibility of becoming rich than face the reality of being poor.    ”

“   You’ll give yourself an attack of apoplexy if you’re not careful!   ”

“   This is a revolution, damn it! We’re going to have to offend somebody!   ”

[moononmyfloor]

Dashing Youth Ep 11-16 Commentary

Ep 1-10, Ep 17-21, Ep 22-25, Ep 26-32, Ep 33-35, Ep 36-40

Ep 11

More flirting

We meet Xiao Se's nasty Emperor dad in his youth, played by the lovely Fan Jinwei, whose Prince Chong I loved in BoY. Not sure if I'm prepared to hate him this time. He looks good tho!

We also meet Wu Xin' mom, who looks like a fractured wistful early-morning dream which is about to float away and dissappear with the slightest breath, never to be found again.

And Luo Qingyang, (not to be confused with everyone's favorite girl crush Mianmian from The Untamed), the angry repressed big finale martial artist from BoY

Ep 12

I love the super powerful but easily spooked wooden sword wielding Mt. Wangcheng disciple, kid you *really* don't need to try study under Master Li, just because he's "the" shifu doesn't mean he's better. He will teach you nothing and isn't batting an eye at his exam candidates dying right under his eyes. Srsly, Mt. Wangcheng, the Lei family and Changfeng's Medicine Shifu's Valley seem to be the only places suitable to bring up well-adjusted, grounded kids in this universe.

Dual cultivating right in front of future wife's salad

Damn his gaze is somehow piercing but indifferent at the same time

(He's gonna explode and die in the future isn't he) Also see, this is what I mean. Most of the shifus in this universe are no good at teaching and guidance. These kids in their youthful vigor and angst are extremely volatile and you all just let them run rampant. They are easily suspectible to being used by bad forces and eventually create massive tragedies for themselves and everyone else.

Well I suppose Dongjun's first shifu was a great guy but 1. He didn't have enough time 2. Even if he did he was dying and sustaining himself in a contained bubble and what he could teach Dongjun about the world was quite limited.

Ahaha I have the exact same pouch! It's a cheap Aliexpress delivery pouch I got a ring sent in

Ep 13

Omg she's TOO CUTE! This young lady and Baba from JoL2 are the prettiet babies I've seen this year!

Local playboy realises his boyfriend from alt universe is happily married and has chosen to live a stress free life, the new boyfriend has ditched him for his future child's mom, his old boyfriend is away in a Detox Vacation and realises his carefree childhood has come to its end 😔

Dongjun:

Also I'm actually kinda surprised to find myself shipping this tragic pair of Dingzhi/Wenjun, and shipping HARD at that. I don't know what I expected but by the the time of BoY, all that remains about their relationship is a sordid gossip but they actually turn out to be two broken lil kids🥺 They don't even have like, a hot and hormonal romance but a one built on sweet childhood promises of protecting his little meimei and caring for her Yun gege. Poor babies😭

Ep 14

Liu Yue thinks he hides it well behind his hat but dude is practically bursting at seams for having gotten a disciple, and he's basically teaching Yue Yao how to flex well and never embarrass herself, which in addition would embarrass himself lol. He also seems to be kinda lonely and bored despite his quirky lil maid and broody bf. It's like he was born to be a social butterfly but with his current social status he cannot.

Inaccurately accurate MTL 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

(Also this is so funny to me with the context that I've read the "lifting the hijab" mtl line in lots of Chinese fics where the couple gets married and that red veil lifting thing happens on the marrige bed lol.)

Dingzhi's master seems to be just as traumatised by life as Dingzhi is. Huang Yi lasohi is actually so good in roles like this. Also can we have an applause for the first genderqueer character in the show woohoo

And then the two shifus have a date about their duel, lol

Ep 15

Baili Dongjun gotta be the naivest ML I've encountered in a while, and by naive I mean beyond the levels of your average innocent, inexperienced teen full of sunlight and getting jaded overtime such as Fang Duobing, Wu Xie, Zhang Chulan etc.

Dongjun has grown up so sheltered and full of positivity, he doesn't seem to register the gravity of things even when they are right in front of his face almost to the point of stupidity.

He provides a stark contrast against his friends, Sikong Changfeng who's been the sweetest but also most down-to-earth kid to begin with and Ye Dingzhi who's been dealing with the weight of the whole world since childhood.

That part where Dongjun saw the arrest warrant for Dingzhi who also turned out to be his long lost bff, was told by his elders that they'll take care of the matter and will bring Dingzhi to him, Dongjun was just like "Ok cool! That's settled then! I'm gonna just chill and have a drink with my new girlfriend then!" was almost funny but sad because,

Kid, you are going to be in a WORLD of hurt VERY soon. You trust strangers way too much!

I mean in BoY you see how severely Dongjun has crashed to the point of wanting to create a broth of oblivion..... I can totally see how that happened.

Also that poster is a severe injustice to Dingzhi's GORGEOUS face lmao

Ep 16

I mostly have opinions about Master Li in this ep, which I compiled in a seperate post linked above

Also my bb Changfeng is back! And straight away he also joined the baby making game, and Dongjun has no choice but to be a good wingman to his bros at this point lmao

Changfeng chose the most comparatively normal and mundane romance arc too. She's the top courtesan for sure but still, for many young gentry she wouldn't have been anymore worth than a fling, but Changfeng just went ahead and offered her the most genuine, authentic companionship ever without a second of hesitation. And walked out head held high, with ZERO idea about how suave and sexy it made him and I'm like:

5/5 Stars No Drama

[morningstarwrites]

I have realized that my awkwardness allergy comment the other day may have come off the wrong way, so in an attempt to remedy that I'm gonna list everything that was SO GOOD about the last chapter.

Niffty getting a "disguise". What little description you gave I imagine her twirling in an Alice-style pinafore. Now I wanna draw American McGee Niffty, blue dress and bloody knife. Also the Cherub being so accepting and nice to her? Great.

Emily. Just everything about Emily, I love her. Especially with Lucifer. I adore her being super chill about him fucking up her name and I need more of that in this fandom. EMILY & LUCIFER BONDING!!! And her genuinely calling him beautiful and him not getting it? Ow my fucking heart. Even more when Alastor seems to notice Lucifer doesn't get it and I just imagine him being struck by a hint of jealousy at the compliment, and then immense frustration that Lulu is so clearly oblivious to how lovely he is. Delicious.

Alastor having boosted Lulu's confidence in his wings? Alastor KEEPING THE FEATHER? T^T Also I lose my shit every time you bring something back from previous chapters. Not enough people do that shit in their writing and it is wonderful.

Alastor being absolutely haunted by Angel's little comment lol. All while knowing that Lucifer, while likely aware of the implication, was not at all thinking about it when he did it. This being of Pure Temptation having the most innocent thoughts behind a perceived lewd act is amazing and adorable and I fucking love it.

Them bickering over ice cream because Alastor is a little shit I love how dumb they are.

Angel's FUCKING ACRONYM lmao because he would.

Alastor being comfortable enough overall with Lucifer to be willing to pretend to make out with him in public despite wanting to crawl out of his skin at the concept? iofhihisifoishuoisdh

How goddamn smooth Lucifer is when putting on a performance of seduction. He is THE Original Temptation and I love it. And him still being mindful of Alastor's comfort and not actually kissing him? AAAAAAAAA 1000% better than if he'd actually kissed him this gives me life. Beauty incarnate in words.

Lucifer finding Alastor's anxious-unxperienced-yet-smooth flirtation incredibly hot and then being startled by the thought despite, y'know, everything else that's happened. XD Can't blame him since the number of relationships he's had can be counted on one hand if not one finger, but he's so internally oblivious I cannot.

"Have you been doing this with other people?" Alastor actually being somehow surprised that this millennia-old, gorgeous, adorable eldritch being, known for THE first temptation into sin, fucks? Despite the blatant evidence in Charlie's existence? And being upset about it? And additionally feeling like he needs to know about Lucifer's sexual history for...reasons? Possessive much? XDDDD

And then being stunned silent at the suggestion and likely realization that he is, in fact, jealous, and probably still not knowing why? And Lucifer's oblivious teasing and then absolute confusion and awkwardness when Alastor DOESN'T DENY IT UGH had me kicking and screaming like a teenage girl.

And again, I'm hyper-sensitive to awkward so me being uncomfy isn't unexpected when Lucifer is by nature an awkward little bean. It can be a sign he's being written well! And your writing is so good that I keep coming back and I'm hoping I'm building up a tolerance. That would be good for me. ^^; I look forward to every Friday for this!

Anyway, hope you're having a marvelous day and you know your worth, that worth being AMAZING. okaybai

Aw were you worried? Thank you so much, I appreciate you clarifying your thoughts!

I love Emily, definitely want more of her! And THANK YOU, I have a million references to previous chapters - as I was trying to compile them into my Fun Facts section it just got too long so I couldn't include them all haha.

I'm a romantic so I want their first kiss to be really beautiful and meaningful!! Super thankful for your message. Very sweet of you 🥰

[aoioozora]

Songs that remind me of Hesh and Logan

I cannot stop thinking of the Walker brothers. Oftentimes when I hear a couple songs on my playlist, I think, "sounds like them," and this little post is a compilation of those songs and my thoughts on them. Eight songs in total.

I got so sad making this hhhhhh

TW: mentions of suicide

Abyss - YUNGBLUD

Abyss always has me imagining the Walker brothers in their own abyss. While Logan is in a literal abyss of torture after his capture, I'm sure Hesh is in an abyss of despair of his own after having lost both his father and his brother to Rorke.

I think the lyrics of this song can be seen and imagined from both of their perspectives.

"Save my life Could someone please, save my life? Could someone please, save my life? 'Cause I've gone cold And I'm stuck in the abyss all on my own"

Sleepyhead - Jutes

Sleepyhead feels more of a Hesh track to me. This feels like these would be close to what Hesh feels and thinks post-Logan capture. Lonely. He'd rather sleep and have Logan in his dreams than wake up to a reality where he isn't around.

"I'd die in my sleep To live in your arms And I'd stay trapped in this dream Don't ring the alarm

Where do I fit? I don't belong If I wake up, will you be gone? There's nowhere to hide I'm lost and I'm scared If I open my eyes, will you be there?"

Hell's Comin' with Me - Poor Man's Poison

Another Hesh track. This screams revenge. You know when he gets a chance to get his hands on Rorke, he's bringing Hell with him to give the antagonist hell.

"He wiped the blood from his face as he slowly came to his knees He said, "I'll be back when you least expect it And hell's coming with me" Hell's coming with me"

I read someone's hc that Hesh would be irritable and prone to anger issues post-Logan capture and I can see that happening. I can imagine him grappling with the loss while simultaneously brooding and being vengeful, possibly thinking of how to get back at Rorke.

We know him to be the sweet and caring big brother, but fuck around too much and you'll find out. He has the potential to turn into a monster himself (on that note, someone did draw parallels with Hesh and Rorke).

Esperándote - Alvaro Soler

This Spanish song makes so much sense to both Logan and Hesh. If you can understand it or look up the English lyrics, you'll see that it's so their song :(

Both of them are lonely, missing each other, and just feeling plain lost without each other. We know they're so close they're practically attached at the hip.

"Soy una isla en el mar Tan solo y tan perdido No tengo punto en el mapa

Soy una isla en el mar Ven a buscarme así no Ya no estaré perdido, no"

[Translation:

I'm an island on the sea So alone and so lost I don't have a spot on the map

I'm an island on the sea Come and look for me so that I won't be lost anymore, no"]

Talking to the Moon - Bruno Mars

What if the boys got so loopy from the torture/depression that they start talking to the moon, imagining, hallucinating that they're talking to their sibling? Logan looking up at the moon from the pit, Hesh looking up at the moon from wherever he is. At least they're looking at the same thing.

Last Resort - Papa Roach

Do you think Hesh got suicidal after losing both Elias and Logan? I feel like this would be his song during that period of time.

"'Cause I'm losing my sight Losing my mind Wish somebody would tell me I'm fine"

Safe and Sound - Taylor Swift, The Civil Wars

Listening to this, I can't help but imagine a young, young Hesh comforting his little brother. What if, when the boys were young, their mother sang this song to comfort them, and Hesh was doing just that to Logan in the her absence?

What if, as Logan's in the pit, he's singing this song to himself?

"Just close your eyes, the sun is going down You'll be alright, no one can hurt you now Come morning light, you and I'll be safe and sound

Don't you dare look out your window, darling, everything's on fire The war outside our door keeps raging on Hold onto this lullaby even when the music's gone, gone"

And then even this song is tortured out of his memories?

Safe and Sound - Capital Cities

This post has been depressing so time to end on a good note!

In happier times, this would be their song. Full of support and encouragement for each other, because that's what family is for :)

[harveyguilleniconodelamoda]

Thoughts on Fashion & Style from Harvey's Instagram Live with Samantha Rei Crossland

Last night, Harvey Guillén joined fashion designer Samantha Rei Crossland for a chat on Instagram Live to talk about life, style, the entertainment industry, and to answer some fan questions! The full video may be available via Harvey or Samantha's IG eventually, as they saved it at the end, but in the meantime I've compiled some of the questions and answers related to Harvey's relationship with fashion and style here!

This text is taken from the video and has been lightly edited for clarity.

Samantha: Dollie says, "as a fan you can really tell Harvey worked deliberately through fashion and photoshoots to establish his style in person, in front of the camera, and on the red carpet. I'd love to hear more about that journey and additionally if you have any tips for achieving confidence in style and fashion."

Harvey: Wow, good question! I feel like that was an avenue that never was presented to me as an option for the first part of my career. You know everyone's like "oh who dressed you?" I dressed myself! I mean I still do, but I didn't really get any kind of help with anything stylish-wise until recently, when I got the opportunity to work with different designers and stylists who introduced me to those designers. That's really what it is: a stylist will get you into an atelier or someone's house, like Christian Siriano or someone like that. But for the most part, for a long time I just kind of dressed myself, and on a budget.

Knowing Harvey was putting these kinds looks together by himself on a budget in 2017 and 2018, I will never again cut any of the Chrises with their MCU money a single centimeter of slack for showing up year after year, to event after event, in bland black or navy suits.

Harvey (continued): Because stylists are worth every penny, but they're expensive! They are expensive because they do a great job, but you also have to be constantly doing that. I think Zendaya was just talking about this in an interview. There's moments where you want a stylist because you want to look your best and you want the best opportunity and possibility, and there's moments where you're like "I'll dress myself, it's just a small event, I'll make it work. I'll make it work with what I have."

But yeah, I really wanted to put myself in a position where...why can't I like fashion? Why can't I do a photoshoot, and why can't I do a cover? I had a publicist, one of my first publicists...I said "I want to be the first to do something, like be on a cover of something like this!" And they straight out loud said "that's not going to happen." And I was like..."oh well, I mean maybe not overnight, but that should be the goal, we should work toward--"

And they were like "yeah, but we want to be realistic...and that's not gonna happen."

Cannot imagine being the person to tell THIS man he's never going to be on the cover of a magazine.

Harvey (continued): I realized, if people on your team are naysayers or they're not seeing the vision, those people aren't on your team. So unfortunately, I had to let them go, because if there's someone on your team who's already being toxic towards your vision, that's not the vision, that's not the vibe, that's not it. And so I'm glad to report that shortly after that we did get a cover! And then I was able to kind of show that off and be like, "it can be done!" You just have to find the right team and the right people who see your vision.

I think for so long it's just been easy to say no to people who don't fit the mold of Hollywood, and I'm not here to fit a mold. I'm here to break it.

Samantha: You're killin' it! You have no idea how many of these questions were just "when is he starting a fashion line?"

Harvey: I want to! I think right now I'm so focused on my main passion, which is acting, and I'm so grateful and blessed to have opportunities that are coming my way and that I am excited for. And now wrapping something that I'm gonna hold so dear to my heart like Shadows for so long, I'm so grateful. And you know, most actors would kill for just the opportunity to be on a show like Shadows and call it a day, and I would be happy if that's the work that I'm known for, because it's such a great show.

But I'm fortunate that I have all of these other things that are coming up. I'm so excited for the opportunities, and I'm excited for the different characters and different roles and different hats I get to put on.

But eventually that would definitely be an avenue that...I mean, it would definitely be on brand! You know? It would be so on brand to open a plus size line, especially because growing up I didn't see as many options for plus size people, period. But if there were, obviously the lean is for female clothing, and it was never for men at all. Like the options for a plus sized guy was like...screen t-shirts and jeans. And that's it!

Or it was always Big and Tall, where if you weren't tall you got stuck with a really short and stout kind of shirt. The measurements were always catered to "if you're big, you gotta be tall," and well, I don't know if that's true, but there was no in between. So that's a market that I would definitely want to look at. But for the time being I'm focusing on the acting part of it.

Samantha: Kelly wants to ask, "do you like any specific colors or patterns? Where are your tastes when you dress high fashion?"

Harvey: I used to be afraid of color a lot because I was always told if you're plus sized or bigger you'll amplify yourself. But I think you shouldn't be afraid of color. Last year, a year ago next month, at the Meta Gala I wore pink! That was all Christian Siriano from head to toe, and there was a wink there and a story behind it--if you know you know--why he and I chose the color pink for the Met Gala and who they were honoring and all of that. So I'm not afraid of color. I try to be very specific about the dimensions and where my leg cuts off or where it elongates my leg.

Harvey's now-iconic outfit from the 2023 Met Gala--whose theme was honoring Karl Lagerfeld--blended foundational style elements of Lagerfeld's most famous designs for Chanel with all the things Lagerfeld loudly hated throughout his life. Lagerfeld was infamous for making shitty comments about plus sized people, people of color, short men, and a host of other things. He also disliked the color pink. So Harvey showing up as himself and looking stunning wearing that glorious pink number was possibly the classiest shade ever thrown.

Harvey (continued): I've just been like the Christian Siriano poster boy this year! Which is a funny story because when I first approached him over a year ago for the Oscars, he was really busy and he said "I really don't make menswear."

And I was like "well I'm not saying I want you to make completely a tuxedo, I want you to do something in the middle." And he was like "well, I kind of did that with Billy Porter" where he put Billy in this really amazing gown. And I was like "well I don't want to do a gown, I want something between that, you know? Like where it doesn't have to be a traditional, boring, just plain old tuxedo, and it doesn't have to be this amazing, beautiful ball gown that Billy had worn."

Because he doesn't really design for men, he designs for women. And he said "this would be the first I would do this." And I said "then that's great! It'll be the first!" And he definitely had never designed for a plus sized man, so we were checking all these boxes off.

So my idea was if someone in 1920 went to an award show but was trying to wear a vintage Victorian or Edwardian outfit to honor a vintage look. So the hair was 1920s. The hair was done by Connie, who was my hair person in What We Do In the Shadows, who helped me originate the original look for Guillermo.

And Romie--who's my best friend since third grade--is my makeup artist, and she did my makeup for the Oscars and makeup for a lot of the events I go to.

And it was just amazing, you know. That outfit...oh my god. Vogue ran it, they got so many likes, it was on every social [media] outlet, and it did so well that last fall, for the first time, [Christian] had a men's line. And I can't help but wonder if it was a coincidence, if it had anything to do with my "how about we try this experiment!"

This beautiful vintage-inspired look for the Oscars was Harvey's first red carpet collaboration with Christian Siriano and landed him on nearly every best dressed list for the event. The metallic brocade tuxedo gown and bell hem trouser were included in Siriano's Fall 2023 line, and are available to order on his website (for a hefty price) as separate pieces in sizes up to a size 30 (58 bust, 60 waist).

Harvey (continued): Christian's been great, and of course he would make amazing pieces for menswear, of course he would!

We collaborated on a lot of things. For the Critic's Choice award we did a really cool cut, which was like a midriff cut with a peek-a-boo of belly. Because you know, I like my body, and I can show it off! And he did it in a way where I was like "woah!" It elongated my leg and it had a peek-a-boo of a little bit of tummy, and it had a neckline that plunges. So it shows your chest, and it's mesh, and then this giant bow on the side that you can take off or put on.

This red carpet look Harvey wore for the Critic's Choice Awards is one of my personal favorites. It feels like plus size people are always being urged to both cover up as much as possible and make ourselves as small as possible. But this outfit stares those demands in the face and says "Why though? Fuck that! Show yourself off and take up space!"

Harvey (continued): It got so many compliments on the carpet! And it's to a T a Christian look, but also very much me, because we collaborated in what that would look like and how I want that on my body, how it looks on my body, because what looks good on me may not look good on someone else. But it's knowing what your best assets are and what you're showing off, and what you want to show off. Because that's what's going to make you feel the most comfortable, when you're showing off something that you love about yourself.

Samantha: That's literally what I tell my clients! You feel the best you've ever looked in your life when everything just fits you perfectly and shows off the best parts of your body that you like the most. It's not about hiding, it's about amplifying.

Harvey: Yeah, exactly.

---

Thank you so much to both Samantha and Harvey for this wonderful conversation on IG Live! It was truly a joy to witness it and get more insight into Harvey's thoughts on fashion and style.

If you're interested in Samantha's designs (including her OFMD-themed makeup pallets!), check out her website here. And you can find WWDITS-themed Harvey-approved merch at his website here!

[thedemoninme141]

A thing of beauty I know, Chapter 2: You lit a flame that consumed my hate.

Previous Chapter

I saw in you what life was missing,you lit a flame that consumed my hate" She began, picking up a damaged guitar.

Weems sat behind her ornate desk in the dimly lit office, her fingers steepled as she contemplated the events of the past year. Thornill aka Laurel poisoning her, bringing back the dead pilgrim, her survival barely thanks to her shapeshifting abilities adapting her body to the venom, but the wildcard in all this, is Wednesday. She is special, good thing Wednesday didn't leave even after she tried to expel her. She wasn't there to witness it but she had heard from the students, how brave Wednesday was, fighting against Crackstone, saving the school against all odds. So she owes Wednesday, unfortunately.

"Principal Weems." And speaking of the devil.

"Yes Miss Addams, you can get in without my permission." Weems retorted.

"I require no one's permission," Wednesday responded confidently. "I need information, and you are going to help me now."

Now Weems tensed, what new problem is lurking around the school now?

"What do you need?"

"There has been quite an addition of students in our school this year, but unusually, most of them are unique and possess too different abilities. So you did not assign them to any of the 3 groups. I need to know their names and abilities."

Weems hesitated, realizing the sensitivity of the information. "That data is highly confidential. Regrettably, I cannot provide it. Moreover, your attempt to gather such information about the students concerns me as the school's principal. Therefore, I must inquire about the purpose behind your request."

Wednesday of course couldn't tell her she needs to know which of those students possess the power of shapeshifting.

"Contingency plan," Wednesday explained. "As you've seen, a single hyde terrorized the entire school. Surely, there are more powerful beings out there. I simply plan to have a strategy to neutralize those beings if they turn against the school and become a threat."

Weems could sense Wednesday was still hiding something, but she decided to let it go for now.

Weems sensed that Wednesday was withholding something, but for now, she chose to let it slide.

"Leave that to me. Just like Hydes aren't allowed in Nevermore, other dangerous entities won't be tolerated either. You don't have to worry about that."

"That went so well last year, didn't it?" Wednesday remarked wryly.

Weems arched an eyebrow at Wednesday's remark.

"Well, we learn from our experiences, don't we?" she replied, her gaze fixed on Wednesday.

Wednesday's eyes narrowed slightly. 

"Indeed, we do. But sometimes, lessons come at a cost. I'd rather not repeat mistakes if I can help it."

Weems sighed, "I know that even if I were to refuse, you'd likely find a more troublesome way to obtain the information. Fine, I'll give you a note with the names and their respective abilities. But I must emphasize, not a single soul can know that you're privy to this information. None of their powers should be revealed to anyone."

Wednesday's eyes glinted with satisfaction. "Your discretion will not be in vain, Principal Weems. The school's secrets are safe with me."

Weems nodded a mixture of concern and resignation in her expression. 

Handing her the note Weems couldn't help but warn her one last time, "Just be cautious, Wednesday. One single mistake can change a person's entire life."

Wednesday glanced back at Weems, her expression unreadable. "I don't make mistakes. I make choices, and I live with the consequences." with that Wednesday left the room.

Weems sat back in her chair sighing

"Sometimes, the consequences we face end up becoming our burden."

As soon as Wednesday entered her room with all the information she had collected, she set up her investigation board. And her work began.

First, she compiled a list of the new students, their names, and the abilities that Principal Weems provided. Wednesday's sharp eyes scanned the list, and her mind started to weave a tapestry of connections and possibilities.

 Wednesday stared at the board, her mind calculating and analyzing the information at hand. The main suspects were four shapeshifting individuals -their names written boldly at the top of the board. Wednesday spared a moment to reflect on each of them, her memory retracing their movements and interactions during the dance.

Darcy Emerson

A recent addition to Nevermore Academy, she possesses an aura of detachment. Her ability, to blend in seamlessly with her surroundings, not only people but objects as well. Rumours circulate about her often observing others from a distance, she rarely engages in social activities. 

Past Unknown.

Elara Heraofta

A solitary figure with a mysterious past, She is also known for her quiet demeanour and preference for solitude. Whispers of her ability to change forms and disappear into the shadows have added an air of intrigue to her presence. Must invesitgate further. 

Adrian Blackthorn

A transfer student known for his charm. His origins remain shrouded in mystery, but he is known not only because he could shapeshift, but he could also read minds, and talk about being peculiar. Less of a suspect and more of a spoiled child in Wednesday's eyes.

Nathan Reed.

The mysterious boy who accompanied you last night. Wednesday's eyes narrowed as she recalled the intensity of his gaze and the discomfort that lingered beneath his facade. The thought that he might have infiltrated your life fueled her determination.

Wednesday's emotions usually locked away in the depths of her stoic exterior, surfaced like ripples on a pond. She couldn't deny the twinge of jealousy that clawed at her insides. The thought of someone else connecting with you unsettled her. It was a feeling she couldn't easily dismiss, a revelation of a vulnerability she wasn't ready to accept yet. How did you manage to breach her mind? The answer seemed to lie in a single song.

The loud cheers, the pulsating beats of the music reverberating in Wednesday's ears. She stood in the midst of the energetic crowd, her monotone expression a stark contrast to the animated faces surrounding her. Enid, her ever-enthusiastic friend, was immersed in the concert, leaving Wednesday contemplating her decision to attend.

Enid turned to Wednesday, excitement radiating from her, 

"Wednesday, our school's band is about to perform! We have to stay and support them!"

Wednesday sighed, her disinterest in concerts evident, but the insistence of her friend prevailed. As Enid focused on the stage, Wednesday discreetly scanned the surroundings, seeking an escape route from the overwhelming spectacle. Just as she contemplated slipping away unnoticed, the lights dimmed, and a haunting red glow enveloped the stage.

A hush fell over the crowd as the ethereal voice of the mysterious performer echoed through the speakers.

"We lost everything" There was something about the voice, something enchanting, attracting that made Wednesday turn and look at the source.

You stood there with a guitar in your hands,

"We had to pay the price" you sang, your voice wrapping around the lyrics like a haunting lament. 

I saw in you what life was missing

You lit a flame that consumed my hate

I'm not one for reminiscing but

I'd trade it all for your sweet embrace

There was a magnetic quality to your performance that held Wednesday in a trance, and she found herself unable to look away. 

Cause we lost everything

We had to pay the price

The disinterest she had initially felt toward the concert melted away, replaced by a growing fascination with the enigmatic figure before her.

There's a canvas with two faces

Of fallen angels who loved and lost

It was a passion for the ages

And in the end guess we paid the cost

As the lyrics continued to unfold, Wednesday's dark eyes remained locked on you. The way you expressed the pain and sacrifice in your voice struck a chord within her, resonating with the shadows that lingered in the recesses of her own soul.

Enid, still caught up in the excitement of the concert, elbowed Wednesday and exclaimed, "Isn't this amazing?"

So entranced by the captivating cadence of your voice, she wasn't even aware of the subtle nod escaping her. As the song reached its pinnacle, the intensity climaxed, and at that precise moment, your eyes locked with hers.

A thing of beauty, I know

Will never fade away

What you did to me, I know

Said what you had to say

But a thing of beauty

Wednesday knew you were looking directly at her, The connection felt electric as if the universe had conspired to create a moment suspended in time.

Will never fade away

And that's how Wednesday first fell for you.

But she couldn't reflect on her memories as Enid came rushing into the room

"Wednesday..." Enid gasped for breath, her eyes wide with shock and terror.

Concern etched across her face, Wednesday inquired, "What happened, Enid?" Her tone laced with worry and anticipation.

Enid took a deep breath, attempting to steady herself. "A student... in the jungle, it's... it's beyond terrible."  Next Chapter