#and by treat I mean a kick to the nethers | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

once-upon-helluvaboss · 9 months ago

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‘Seeing Stars’ Rewrite

Stolas begins to speak, a vision of the galaxy appearing as he does, “In the great expanse of the nether there exists boundless amounts of magnificent phenomenon the great brilliance of an exploding star, the nimble dance of space dust through a nebula but once every one thousand years our corner of reality is treated to an incredible sight from the deep eldritch recesses of the cosmos the tears of a forgotten colossus begin to fall.” Stolas says with a smile describing one of his passions to his daughter, Octavia.

“Tears made of the hopes and dreams of every living thing that never came to be. Condensed and sent shooting across the night sky in a dazzling final display. We can see what appears to mortal beings as a meteor shower for what it truly is: Azathoth's Tears.” Stolas finishes ending the vision still holding his young daughter.

“Daddy, can we go see it someday?” Octavia giggled

Stolas chuckled “Yes, dear. I promise, when the day comes nothing will be able to keep me from being there with you. Good night, my Owlette.” He responded nuzzling Octavia before tucking her in and giving a peck on the forehead.

“Goodnight Daddy!” Octavia yawned as she turned in bed.

_______

Several years into the present an older Octavia looks as happy as she did in her bed many years ago. She circled the date on her calendar that read ‘Starfall today!!’ with a doodle of her and her father on the side.

She hopped down the hallway while tugging on her boots, “Dad, dad?” She yelled as she entered the kitchen but he wasn't there. She paused for a moment before hearing faint yelling from her father's office.

She opened the cracked open door, her face dropping when she heard what all the yelling was about.

“No, I'm not sending her things over! She’s only staying for a few days or so!” Stolas yelled over the rotary phone, squeezing their butler like a stress toy. Octavia always felt bad when her parents did that to him, even if it wasn't often.

“No, –if Stella wants me to send her stuff over then she can tell me that! So with that being said, please get her back on the phone!” He yelled continuing to squeeze the poor imp tighter.

“Dad? What’s going on?” Octavia asked, entering the room.

Stolas turned before sighing, “ Ugh, nothing dear, it’s just that your uncle seems to think your mother can’t exist somewhere for two minutes without everything she owns!” Stolas grumbled

“--never want’s to see you again!” Octavia’s uncle yelled through the phone, “Everyone will—” Stolas dropped the imp he was choking to press his hand over the phone's speaker, with a groan.

“Um Dad, will this be done before tonight?” Octavia asked,

Stolas sighed, “Oh I doubt it dear… Knowing your uncle I doubt he’s going to stop calling, I might just send a few things over just so he’ll shut up!” Stolas groaned, still covering the phone's speaker.

Octavia stared dejected, “But-” Before she could finish her uncle said something particularly loud over the phone, something that she couldn’t quite make out.

Stolas groaned again, “I’m really sorry dear but, can we talk later? Your uncle is being a bit of B-I-T-C-H!” Stolas spelled out.

“Excuse me, how dare—” Her uncle yelled before it became more incomprehensible screaming.

“Well, how was I supposed to know you can spell?! I've never seen you read!” Stolas responded pettily.

Octavia groaned as they continued arguing, she turned around and shut the door of her father's, still being able to hear him and her uncle arguing.

She stomps back to kicking the door open. She slams the door and yells as she rips up the calendar page, angrily toppling her telescope over, she then grabs a bag with her things and leaves the mansion.

_______

“Loona, honey please, I didn't mean it like tha— shit!” Blitzo curses running back as Loona charges toward him with an angry look.

She picks up an empty water cooler sending it flying toward his face, hitting him dead on, “FUCK! Uh, I mean good throw honey! I-i’m so proud of you~!” Blitzo gulps trying to calm her down, she pounces on him continuing to beat him.

Millie walks past with her and Moxxies matching coffee cups, as Loona grabs a picture of the wall beating Blitzo with it. “Honey, what's all this about?” She asks as she joins Moxxie on the couch watching the two from afar.

“Huh, oh! Blitzo finally talked to her about her attitude with customers, or trying to at least.” Moxxie said with a sly smile as he grabbed his cup from Millie.

Blitzo runs behind the couch Moxxie and Millie are sitting as Loona growls at him, “I just think some small tweaks might help you be more of a uh, people person, y’know?” Blitzo laughed

“I am a people person!” Loona growled as she went and grabbed him by the collar, “If I’m sooo terrible then why don’t you just grow a pair and replace me?!” She growls

Blitzo stares at her for a second before gulping down the lump in his throat, “W-well maybe I- maybe I will!” Blitzo responded semi-confident.

Loona’s eyes widen before she growls again as she grips his collar tighter, “What did you say?”

Blitzo turned his head over to Moxxie and Millie who gave him a thumbs up, “ I said maybe I will, little missy! Yeah, that's right it's tough love time! So, now you can... go... to your desk!” Blitzo said pumped with confidence.

Loona growls again before dropping him and stomping back to her desk. She plops herself down incoherently mumbling to herself as Octavia walks through the door, her hair wrapped around her face as a last-minute disguise. Thankfully for her with all the commotion no one had noticed her enter.

“Sir, if I may say so; you're doing the right thing. If we don't even have a cheerful qualified receptionist, how can people trust us to massacre and mutilate their enemies for them? It's what's best for business.” Moxxie said sincerely as he helped Blitzo up.

Octavia freezes as Loona spots her sneaking in, she’s surprised when she does react but Octavia continues on her way nonetheless.

She heads into Blitzo's office and starts rummaging around at his desk to no avail. She pauses for a moment wondering if the grimoire is actually here. She had only vaguely overheard her father speaking about the agreement so she began to worry that it may just be back at the house and she came all this way for nothing.

Just then she sees a framed picture of all the I.M.P members on the wall that looked oddly out of place from the other photos, “Maybe…” She said to herself as she moved it aside before sighing in relief at the sight of a safe with cobwebs around it.

‘Blitzo's stuff Do-Nut Steel!!’ A sticky note on the side read with horse doodles, she looked at the keypad and paused. She typed in 1-2-3-4 expecting a red light and beep but instead blinked in surprise when it opened.

“How in Mammons's name have they not been robbed yet? Whatever!” She wondered before shaking her head and flipping open the grimoire.

“Take me to the stars,” Octavia said as a pentagram began to swirl around her feet as some smoke-like darkness streamed toward the ceiling.

Outside the office, Moxxie sat on the couch behind Blitzo massaging his shoulders. Millie sitting opposite the two loops up to see the light show coming from the office.

“Uh, Blitzo?” She says pointing towards the door.

Blitzo shoots up from his massage as he and Moxxie snap their heads towards the door, “The fuck?”

He and the other imps squeeze through the door with weapons drawn just in time to see Octavia disappearing through the portal.

As Blitzo stares slack-jawed for a moment Loona suddenly yells, “Oh yeah, by the way, you have a visitor!”

________

Octavia slowly blinked her eyes open, “W-where am I?” She says as she looks down onto a blank Hollywood star as a hobo near her vomits onto it, causing Octavia to slide backward and yelp.

As she does this she notices she has fallen onto someone, she then looks up realizing she has just crushed some famous comedian, Brennon Ragers, an eyeball having popped out of his head. She quickly grabs the grimoire that lies next to him. As Octavia looks up the portal closes she then runs off with the grimoire.

“Woah, s-sorry!” Octavia says as she bumps into a clown.

“This is my territory, bitch! Take your shitty costume and get the fuck off my corner!” He yells as he pushes Octavia.

Octavia grabs her things and runs across a crosswalk while cars swerve and almost hit her. She runs into a protest mob. She looks horrified seeing them holding signs that say, "Demons walk among us", "God hates you personally", and "<- To Hell" coincidentally pointing at her.

She dodges away from them and almost runs into a gleaming golden statue of a man smiling with his hand out. Octavia falls to the ground before grabbing the grimoire and scrambling into an alleyway.

“Take me back home, take me back home, take me back home!” She repeats yelling at the pages of the grimoire but the book does nothing as she begins to tear up.

______

“Shit, shit, shit, shit!” Blitzo cursed as he paced around the room, “What the fuck am I supposed to tell Stolas?!” He yelled, grabbing Moxxie.

“Well, he seems to like you, sir. Maybe he would understand—” Moxxie started before Blitzo pulled him close to his face.

“Listen, my dick is good, but it is not that good, Moxxie,” Blitzo started before shoving him away and going back to pacing.

“Sir, I don't think we really have a choice! He’s already going to lose his mind when he realizes Octavia’s gone, what do you think he’s going to do to us if he finds out we were involved and didn't say anything?” Moxxie explained as Millie helped him up.

“Okay well, what do you suppose I say to him? You just want me to call him up and be like,” Blitzo starts grabbing his phone and dialing Stolas, “ Hey~ so, your daughter came by, took your book, and teleported off to who the fuck knows where, and we have no way of getting either of them back, okay?! Okay! Good talk, byeee!” Blitzo's voice cracked realizing he had actually called Stolas, he put the phone down before backing away slowly.

After a moment of silence Blitzo gave a small smile, “Huh, that went better than I thou—”.

Before Blitzo could finish the door blew up as Stolas burst inside in his full demon form. His large black form outlined in red caught Blitzo under his claw as if he were a lizard.

“BLITZO” His loud deep voice yelled leaving Blitzo to begin laughing nervously under his heavy talon.

_______

After calming down for a while in the alley, Octavia knew she needed to leave before the mob saw her. She decided to try to talk to people on the street, who ignored her.

“Hey, do y- Can you help - h-how do I get ah - I - excuse me, I just need to know where I can... see the stars?” She groans and rubs her eye, pulling her beanie over her face.

“Why do I bother? These people are all idiots anyway!” She huffed

As she says that a pamphlet flies into her face, she rips it away and reads it, the center panel reads ‘Star Struck Tourz.’

Octavia smiles, crumpling the flier close to her chest, “Yes!” She exclaims as she runs to grab a seat on the bus. However, through her excitement, she failed to notice the ‘Stalk your fave celeb!’ in the bottom left corner.

______

Stolas paces around in front of Moxxie, Millie, and Blitzo after thankfully calming down.

“How could this happen?! Do you just let anyone waltz into your office and grab infinitely powerful artifacts?!” Stolas cried, pulling his hat off. “ Why would she do this? She’s not that type to run off like this!”

Loona walks into the and sniffs the air. “Mm, it reeks of urine and desperation so... Ugh... L.A.

Everyone gives Loona a look of surprise.

“What?” She asked with a growl, and before she knew it she was being pulled through a portal that the rest of IMP and Stolas walked through.

“ Alright, Loona, let's make this quick, in and out before anyone notices us!”

The sudden sounds of gunfire and screaming make Blitzo survey the alley.

“Huh, this place doesn't look too different from Hell.” He shrugged, “ Alright, now let's get to work!”

Loona sniffs before removing an empty can from her hair “How am I supposed to smell anything in this city?!”

“Can you even do one thing right?” Moxxie mumbled,

“Can you finally do something about how fat you are?” Loona responded smugly

“I'm not –”

“Loona don’t…” Blitzo scolded

Moxxie gave an appreciative smile as Loona responded “Oh c’mon! You would’ve found that funny like a week ago!”

“Maybe but things are a little different now!” Blitzo responds with a smile as he jumps up on a dumpster and tapes a picture to the open lid. It was a simple doodle of IMP with Loona in her human disguise and Stolas with a fake mustache.

“Now, first things first we're gonna do this the old-fashioned way! We're gonna need disguises!” Blitzo said explaining his plan.

As he says so Loona and Stolas transform into their human disguises.

Millie claps in amazement while Moxxie rolls his eyes unimpressed. Blitz's eyes widen and he blushes a small bit seeing his human form.

His face quickly dropped, however, “No chance you can conjure us a couple of those, can ya?”

“Sadly, no. I'm afraid without my grimoire, my powers are just a tad limited in the human world.”

“You've had that book for years and you didn't memorize your fucking spells?” Blitzo asked annoyed.

“Pft, like your memory's so great!” Stolas laughs before gesturing to Moxxie. “What's his phone number?” He asked smugly

“Fuck you,” Blitzo responded in defeat.

Stolas laughed in triumph as the group left the alley and as they walked Stolas grabbed a pair of red-tinted sunglasses, putting on his head where his second pair of eyes would be in his normal form. As they continue Moxxie runs face-first into a human.

“Hey, little man. How about you check out this demo right here? This is some premium Grade-A fire right here! Perfect for you to crank with the little lady.” The man grabbed Millie pulling her close to her obvious displeasure.

“Oh, wow! Did you make this? Thank you!” Moxie says before he and Millie walk away as the dude follows and stops them.

“Oh, hey, hey, hey. Hold up a sec, you just gonna grab it and go?” The man asked

“He said, ‘Thank you’.” Millie huffed

“Twenty bucks, man.” The man said holding out his palm.

“Oh uh Millie, do you have money to pay this talented artist?” Moxie asked as Millie gave him a funny look.

Millie grumbled watching as the rest of their group walked past the corner without them. “You can just give it back, Mox,”

Moxxie quickly pulls her into a bush, “Millie! These artists put their heart and soul into their work! I can't just give it back like it's worthless!”

“It probably is,” Millie said rolling her eyes

“Well yeah probably, but in hell people just stab you for money, at least humans here are creative with trying to steal from you. I feel like I kinda owe it for the creativity, y’know?” Moxie responded with a shrug

Before Millie can respond a woman walks past and flips a coin to Moxxie.

“Sick demon costume, man!” She smiles

Moxxie and Millie both stare at the coin Moxxie received.

“It's metal as fuck!” She compliments again as she walked.

“I have an ide- Oh, woah!” Moxxie stands up attempting to flip the coin before accidentally dropping it.

He chases after it,” Hey, hey, hey, hey, come back here!” Millie laughes as she watched Moxxie chase the coin before he finally grabbed it.

Moxxie flips it again, catching it correctly this time. “I have an idea!”

_______

Octavia groans at the bus stop again before the tour guide comes on the speaker, “And to your left, you'll see the home of one of those influencers who think they're hot shit 'cause now they do TV shows.”

Octavia watches as a woman and her kid hop into a limo while a man lies prostrate on the ground crying and begging. However, once the limo drives away he stands up and begins kissing the man standing nearby wearing a pink bathrobe.

She groans and turns away pulling her beanie down over her eyes.

In a shop called ‘Little Costume Shop of Horrors’, Blitzo walks out the front door dressed in a pink shirt, blue jeans, and wig. His horns have been covered with frankly gigantic ears.

“So?” Blitzo says gesturing to himself proud of his disguise.

Stolas looks up from his fidgeting fingers to see Blitzo, “I don't think that’s going to fool any—”

Before Stolas could finish a woman screams excitedly.

The girl next to her also squeals “Look, everyone! It's Holly's Wood star, Brennon Ragers!”

“Who the fuck is Brendon Rager - Oh.” Blitzo paused as he stared up at a billboard for ‘Sweetie! I'm In the House!! Guest Starring Brennon’.

Stolas also looks up to the same sight “Oh, dear.”

A crowd immediately mobs Blitzo, taking pictures and begging for things while Blitzo tries to escape.

“Moxxie, Millie, where the fuck are you?!”

“♫ You're my lovely little monster, and I'll never say goodbye. I will kill for you, until the day we die. ♫”

As Moxxie and Millie finish singing the crowd cheers throwing roses and money Moxxie's way while he bows. He points to the money earned to Millie with an excited look, Millie is less than impressed but gives a soft smile back when Moxxie looks her way.

Finally, Moxxie goes over to give the money, “And, here you are, my fellow Troubadour.” Moxie says with a bow.

“Whatever, man. Get the fuck outta here, you're cramping my business.” The guy responds annoyed, snatching the cup of coins away.

Millie sighed glad the ordeal was over, “Come on, babe! We have to catch up to Blitzo before–”.

She turns and runs face-first into a mural.

“Ayyy, wanna buy some art?” A shady salesman says.

“Wha? YES!” Moxie exclaimed picking up the flyer as Millie facepalms.

______

“I'm cutting my hospital bill out of their pay” Blitzo shouts as the crowd continues to surround him.

Suddenly a limo swerves and several agents jump out to break the commotion. A man blows his whistle with a diploma in his hands, and Blitzo is finally let go.

Another man walks up to Blitzo holding a bag of fruit snacks, “Mr. Ragers, we've been looking for you everywhere. You were supposed to be on set an hour ago!” The man says.

“The fuck are you talking about?” Blitzo says pulling himself off the ground.

“Your guest spot on…” The man pauses to eat a fruit snack. “ ‘Sweetie! I'm in the House!!’ “ The man pulls his phone out showing an ad, the same one on the billboard.

“We're taping tonight. Now, hurry up and get in the car!” The man says shoving his phone back into his pocket

“Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no! I'm not going anywhere with you, jizz-biscuit!” Blitzo responds by flipping the man off.

“Very funny, Mr. Ragers. Now, get in the car” The man says sternly, calling the bodyguards to take him to the car.

“Get your fucking hands off me!” Blitzo yells briefly, managing to escape before being recaptured.

“Loona! Stolas! A little help, here?!” Blitzo calls as his fake ears fall off, a man dropping his baby to catch them as the crowds begin to tear each other apart to get the ears.

Somehow through the chaos, Stolas manages to get over to Blitzo “E-excuse me, sir. I'm… ah, Mr. Ragers' agent, and I don't believe you can just—” Suddenly an agent behind Stolas cracks his neck, and grabs him from behind.

“Oh! I didn't think you humans could be that strong!” Stolas shreik's in surprise.

Both he and Blitzo are thrown into the limo, Blitzo manages to the door, but it closes before he can escape.

“Ugh Blitzo, we don't have time for this! Via could be anywhere, she could be in even worse danger than us!” Stolas cried.

“Don't worry, I'm on it!” Blitzo exclaims before breaking a window with his horns, and spotting Loona punching the people in the crowd

“Loonie, go find Octavia! We'll catch up soon!” Blitzo yells Loona responds by flipping him off.

“Way to be a team player, sweetie!” Blitzo says sarcastically, Stolas looks at him with worry. “She's uh, in great hands!” Blitzo responded with a nervous laugh.

______

Octavia walks off the bus angrily ripping the pamphlet in half. She walks away from the group, not noticing a crime scene in annoyance, walking on top of a corpse. She then stops when she comes across a sign titled, "Star Owl: Souvenir Shop."

She pulls out her phone taking a picture of the sign, however as she gets ready to walk past the shop she slowly stops to see what's inside the shop itself, her eyes fixated on a box with the word ‘Starstruck, on it.

______

“Hey Blitzo?” Stolas said back in the limo.

“Yeah?”

“Earlier you said you cutting the hospital bill out of… the other two’s pay so, I was just wondering do you have health insurance?” Stolas asked

“Ugh barely! We only got the cheap coverage with Moxxie’s help, not sure where he got the money though… but honestly, we were going for mid-tier but then there was Mammon and his fuckin’ price gouges!” Blitzo groaned

“Eh, I wouldn't worry too much about it.” Stolas shrugged, “He does this every five years or so, sometimes longer depending on how badly the riots affect the Sins. And with prices like these, I doubt you’ll see anything costs like that for the rest of your to life!” Stolas chuckled knowing he and other Goetias often bet on how bad the property damage would be whenever .

Soon enough the limo arrived at a building entitled ‘Starstruck Studios’. An agent has Stolas slung over his shoulder while other agents carry a resisting Blitzo, doing everything in his power to try and escape, but to no avail. With the paparazzi around him, he is then thrown to a chair in a makeup room.

“Let's get him ready! He's on in five!” The producer yells to everyone in the room.

“What? "Five" what? I-I can't be on a sitcom!” Blitzo exclaimed before being smacked in the face with a powder pad, with Stolas beside him holding water bottles.

“Should've had an ego crisis before signing the contract.” The producer responds sarcastically.

“I-I-I… Whoa-, I don't even know the fucking lines!”

“That's why God invented teleprompters!” The producer smiled.

Blitzo stared at the wreck of a cast as an actress smoking a cigarette, a child actress snorting cocaine, and some guy on a teleprompter showing "GOD KILL ME PLS" before he broke down and electrocuted the guy on top of it.

“Uh, shouldn't he rehearse, or something?” Stolas said trying to get more time.

“No can do, we're live in 1-minute people!” The producer said as he walked out the stage, and Blitzo began to hyperventilate.

“Oh, shit! Oh, shit! Oh, shit! Oh, shit! I-I... I can't do this. No, not again. I-I haven't performed since–” Blitzo starts as Stolas walks up to him.

He reaches his hand out to touch Blitzo, but he pulls away before he can. Stolas pauses before gulping a lump in his throat and holding his hands to himself. “Blitzo, if your performance on stage is half as good as it was back in the circus, you'll leave them breathless!” Stolas smiles

Blitzo takes a deep breath before looking up at Stolas, “Y’know what? You're right I got this! Uh thanks for that!” He says with an appreciative smile and Stolas smiles back. “And I promise after all of this, we will get right back to finding Octacvia!” Blitzo says

“Good, now hurry and go wow them!” Stolas responds pushing Blitzo onto the set before the lights are turned on.

“Break a leg, Blitzo!” Stolas says as one last bit of encouragement before closing the door and heading to the audience section.

The lights come on a bit faster than Blitzo had anticipated before the director says “Action!”

The theme music plays and the scene opens with a male actor on the couch.

Well, if it isn't our neighbor, Ronnie. You feel that earthquake earlier?” The man says

Blitzo looks at the stage distressed before his eyes snap towards Stolas who gestures at the teleprompter with his lines on it.

“Oh, that was just my wife rolling out of bed!” Blitzo says.

The audience is unresponsive at first but laughs instantly. Blitzo then smiles to their reaction, not being able to see the signs indicating people to laugh with a bit of static.

Blitzo smiles enthusiastically “Yeah, and then that bitch hit her head on the way down and shattered her skull!” He says.

The signs don’t change, as they still say "Laugh", but no one is laughing, except for Stolas, who finds it lightly humorous.

“There's blood everywhere... pee in her pants…” Blitzo continues starting to lose his rhythm.

Stolas lightly chuckles as the rest of the audience stays silent. Both he and the audience look up at the signs, which say, ‘Srsly, laugh anyway’, and the audience proceeds to laugh at this as well. Blitzo, becoming less nervous, smiles at Stolas, a light blush appearing across his face as he smiles back.

______

Loona sips a coffee and opens up her phone to ‘Sinstagram’ She walks around the city with a song playing on her phone, she stops when she spots the ‘Star Owl: Souvenir Shop’ sign on the wall. She admires this and takes a selfie with it to post on her Sinstagram.

After posting the photo and scrolling down her feed, she notices a post from Octavia at the same location. Taken aback by this, she quickly gulps down her coffee, and takes a closer look at Octavia's profile, with some of her recent posts being pictures she took throughout the city.

One post shows a castle, with the caption reading ‘Found a cool looking castle, reminds me of home…’ Loona looked down seeing it had only been posted two minutes ago. As Loona looks around the city she sees the same castle from the post is right behind her. She crushes the coffee in her hand before throwing it down and running towards the castle.

Loona looks around trying to find Octavia, but her phone goes off again, revealing another post from Octavia showing where she is at, but no sign of her when she looks up. In another post, where she's seen in front of the Holly's Wood sign, Loona is right in front of it.

She sighs in relief and sees someone wearing the same beanie as Octavia, only to turn her around to find a human that looks like her from behind.

Loona sighs as goes back to her phone and begins scrolling through her phone and running to multiple places that Octavia has been in, with the background changing to its exact location, but every attempt proves futile with Octavia nowhere to be found. Loona stops and pants before she approaches the observatory from Octavia’s recent post.

_____

Back at Starstruck Studios, the audience ranges from fairly entertained to mentally scarred as Stolas looks troubled seeing the clock.

“Oh, Uggie! You've gone and done it again!” Blitzo says to a pug who seems to have urinated on the set's couch. “That's the fifth couch this week!” He continues enthusiastically.

The audience chuckles seemingly genuinely enjoying the without the prompt to laugh.

“You know, maybe it's about time I found you a new home, one that could put up with your attitude!” He says booping the dog's nose.

“I could take him, Mr. Ronnie! I'd be happy to adopt old Uggie and give him the attention he needs!” A child actress says.

The family comes together, and the spotlight centers only on them, with cute animals surrounding them. The crowd responds with an ‘Awww’.

“Yeah... yeah, maybe, you should adopt…” Blitzo pauses as he looks at Uggie, and he starts to remember a moment from several years prior, Blitzo looking in a cell with a bunch of hounds, the one in the center resembling Uggie.

_____

“Aww, they're all so cute. And they're... Sad.” Blitzo said next to a lady at a Hellhound adoption center.

“Maybe you could adopt this one here. Quite a strong lad, he'll be perfect for whatever work you want to use him for.” She says pointing to another hellhound.

Blitzo sets his sights on the dog he's recommended, but his look of excitement turns into disgust after seeing the hound's face.

“Ugh! No, I'm not looking for an ugly worker. I need something more uh family-friendly!

“A gift for the wife, huh? No problem. We have a nice selection of other hounds.” The woman says still deadpan as the two continue to walk, Blitzo stops for a moment at the cell in front of him.

“Hey, who's that?” Blitzo said pointing to the cell.

In the cell an angry teenage Loona was texting on her phone with a younger vicious hound holding a bat full of bloody nails, wanting Loona's phone.

“Oh, her? That's just Loona. What a nightmare.” The woman grimaces.

The younger hound is thrown against the cell bars. Loona pants furiously then crawls back in her space.

“Serious attitude problems. She'll be out of our hair next month when she ages out.” The woman tutes as Loona’s look of anger turns to sadness.

Loona scoots back over on her bench, holding herself and shedding tears.

“Good riddance if you ask me. She'll never amount to much of anything.” The woman grimaces as Blitzo stares sympathetically before flashing back to the present.

______

“No. No, no, no, you can't have her! She's mine, and I love her!” Blitzo says pulling the pug close to her

The screens above the set flick "Awe?", the audience does as so as Stolas stares utterly confused.

“But, Mr. Ronnie, you gotta let me have the puppy. You just gotta!” The child actress begs before Blitzo hisses at her.

“Don't you touch her, you little anal fissure!” Blitzo yells as the audience begins to laugh, offending Blitzo “Oh, you think this is funny, assholes?!” Blitzo yells as he points to the child actor, who's trying to walk away from his outburst.

“She's not fit to be a mother! I saw her doing lines of coke in her dressing room!” Realizing how far off character he was, the producer sends his agents to try and deal with Blitzo.

“Now, uh... Ronnie. I think maybe you should–” An adult actress tries to say as she reaches for Uggie, but he smacks her off of him and the wig on her head before jumping in the crowd area.

“No! You can't have my baby, bitch!” As the agents corner Blitzo, he pulls out his pistol against them, with the screens above exclaiming "Oh, shit!"

“I'LL NEVER GET RID OF HER!” More people pile on top of Blitzo, and he shoots several of them in the head but is still trapped within the crowd.

“I'm coming, Blitzo! Excuse me! Would you mind?!” Stolas says tripping over someone

As Stolas tries to move through the crowd to save Blitzo, he is pushed back. Quickly he becomes fed up with this, so he pauses as he begins to revert to his large demonic form, black feathers begin to pop out of his skin, and the red-tinted glasses fall off as they are replaced with his real second set of eyes. But before he finishes a stray shot from Blitzo narrowly misses him taking him out of his focus.

It does however alert him to the several cameras surrounding making him groan. His eyes dart around the set as he tries to find an alternative way to help Blitzo before his eyes land on the water bottles in his arms.

He grabs one and punts it at an agent knocking him out, he gives a devilish grin as he begins throwing the acid-water-filled bottles at them with expert precision. However, he misses one shot and hits the producer causing the bottle to pop open. As the acid water spills all over him, burning his skin severely in turn it causes him to knock down the teleprompter, as it reads ‘Let it burn’ in red, lighting the stage on fire, and puts the lights out for a moment.

Stolas gets accidentally pushed back by the crowd, almost falling into one of the raging fires in the studio before Blitzo catches him by the arm.

“C’mon, let's go find our daughters!” He says determined, with his gun in hand, his pink shirt is ripped in half. An explosion bursts behind him highlighting his toned figure as Stolas blushes in response once again, before being dragged to the exit.

______

Loona is still looking around until she halts at a staircase seeing a crying Octavia by herself. Octavia looks up to see a blue hue next to her, which is Loona reverting back into her normal form.

“Oh hi…” Octavia says wiping her tears.

“How did you find me? I don’t remember you ever getting my scent…” Octavia asks as Loons comes closer to her.

“Sinstagram. Nice pics by the way.” Loona says holding out her phone.

“Oh, thanks.” Octavia sniffles

You okay?” Loona asks sitting next to her.

“No! I just can't believe I was so stupid! I spent all day looking for a place where I could see the meteor showers. And all I get is... this!” She exclaims gesturing to the smoggy sky.

“Yeah, smog's a bitch.” Loona sighs as she attempts to light up a cigarette, but no flames come out. As she tries, Octavia snaps a flame for Loona's cigarette. Loona takes a puff before continuing.

“You know, your dad's really worried about you,” She says scooting closer to Octavia.

“Right! That's why you're here instead of him!” She scoffs.

“Octavia listen, I promise if he could be here he would be but—”.

“It's not that!” Octavia cries cutting Loona off.

They both stare at each other before Octavia turns her head in embarrassment, “Well it's not just that… He’s promised me for years that he’d take me to see Azathoth's tears but he’s been so busy with that imp and yelling at my uncle that he doesn't even remember!” Octavia sniffles.

“I mean, my mom isn't even in the house and she still remembered to go on a ‘girl's weekend’! This is the one thing I’ve been wanting to do with me and he forgot… and on top of all that he’s not even here to come get me!” She cried stuffing her head back into her knees.

There's a pause between the two for a moment before Loona sighs “Sometimes... sometimes it's not as simple as that. This kind of shit gets messy, and everybody's got issues, especially your dad right now. And sometimes people just fuck up! And that's okay, plus it doesn't mean he doesn't care!”.

“Well if he cares, then where is he?” Octavia asks lifting her head

“He's somewhere down there,” Loona says pointing down to the city.

“He's here?”

“Looking for you. I mean... try to cut your dad some slack.” Loona says as she finally gets her lighter to work. “He may not always get it right, but... he's trying.” She says looking at the lighter and fixating on the I.M.P logo on it, and gives a smile as she looks towards Octavia.

Octavia looks at her by surprise, until she notices a light shining on her face, she looks up to see the full moon as the smog clears up. As the two stare at the moon, Loona turns off her lighter before throwing her cigarette, and stands up for a few stretches.

“You ready to go?” Loona says extending her hand to Octavia, but instead, she gives her the grimoire.

“Yeah.”

Loona gives her hand to Octavia once more, which she grabs, Loona lightly ruffling her feathers as they walk out together.

Down near the ground, the Starstruck Studios building is still burning, while police cars are heard, Blitzo and Stolas are walking away. Blitzo looks at his phone on the maps app with a location titled ‘Not Topic’.

“Now, if we could just find where…” Before he could finish his sentence a red portal appears in front of them, where Loona exits.

“Loona!” he calls as Octavia exits the portal after her.

“Oh, Loona, my sweet baby girl! I'm so sorry, I'll never replace you no matter what you–” Before he can finish his sentence, Loona furiously kicks him in the groin as he winces in pain.

“You're good,” Loona says as Stolas painfully looks at Blitzo until he faces Octavia.

“Dad... I'm so sorry.” Stolas runs up to hug her, as he reverts to his demon form.

“Oh, I'm just relieved you're okay! But, what would possess you to do such a thing? You know I haven't taught you spells like this yet, you could have landed yourself somewhere worse than here!”

“Didn't think there was a place worse than here…” Loona said sarcastically.

“I just wanted to see the stars you promised to show me,” Octavia replied

“The stars?” Stolas gasped “Azathoth's tears! Oh, no. Oh, my dear sweet Via. I am so–” Octavia stops him as she hugs him.

“It's okay dad, I’m still a little upset but you're here now, and that's what matters!”

Stolas returns the hug to his daughter. Loona watches happily, before noticing Blitzo trying to hug her, and she sighs and lets him hug her which he does happily. She then notices a faint glow in the sky, she looks as fireworks light up the night. As she begins to record she also notices the burning building not too far away from them.

“The fucks that about?” She asks as she turns around.

“My acting career.” Blitzo sighs with a laugh as more fireworks take off in front of them, Stolas and Octavia look up in awe.

“Oh look at that one! Did you see that one?” Octavia says happily.

“Hm, now where the fuck are M n' M?” Blitzo asks as his phone buzzes.

______

Millie is on her phone texting Blitzo, around the alley that she came from, the portal back to I.M.P Headquarters appears in front of her. Moxxie is carrying a heavy bag full of art paraphernalia.

“Geez, I never knew art could be so heavy! I mean, I would've never gotten around hell with a bag half the size of this!” Moxxie huffed.

Millie stepped into the portal, and before Moxxie could enter, he was stopped by another music salesman wanting to sell his CD's. Moxxie approaches to pay him for the demo, but Millie throws a knife and kills the salesman before Moxxie can pay him.

“March, mister!” She says throwing the C.D. to the ground.

Moxxie sighs as he begins walking toward the portal before Millie picks up and carries him effortlessly through, throwing the trophy bag behind her just before the portal closes.

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Okay quick rant it took me days to get this out because it wouldn't paste properly!

Anyway, I hated Loona in this ep, she is so abusive to Blitzo and I don't really get why?

Also I have a conspiracy theory that someone on the writing crew has beef with Moxxie's va or something because the ‘ha ha Moxxie fat’ jokes don't make sense. It's just not funny and I will never understand it!

Also I thought Stolas being sexual with Blitzo and him not reacting as if last season didn't happen was weird! So I hope this rewrite addresses the issues me and others had with this ep.

Also if you have anything to add or say please do! I really enjoy talking about my work with other people.

#anti stolas #helluva boss critical #helluva boss critique #helluva boss criticism #helluva boss rewrite

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rainbowchaox · 2 years ago

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Look mates- I know I’m been posting often it’s because I’m hype for the content that is coming soon, and I might as well give you my headcanons about Netherborn and avian culture and why they are so similar and mesh well together. (Yes in the lens of Ranchers). Though I did warn you that I will be “normal” during this whole period.

1. There’s tons of similarities between the two species. They are very social in general. They tend to create strong bonds that forms a group that are very invested in. The avian version would be a flock. A flock can be with actual biological family or those that the avian deems close.it’s actually quite common for avians to have anyone they care about into said flock. And avians don’t care if you are of the same species. If you are friendly you probs gonna be part of flock whether you know it or not. if a avian considers Themself unworthy or something is wrong with them by the actions of their flock they will isolate themselves and just become mentally unwell but their instincts will not blame them. Some avians if they are treated unfairly for too long a time will start to be aggressive and act out. Meanwhile Netherborns have a similar social structure in terms of packs. Formed because netherborns were the bottom of the food chain in the Nether as a form of protection. So they are very protective of those they consider in their pack. But with this idea unlike avians who thinks they are the problem when their flock treats them horribly. If any pack mate does the same all the netherborns in the pack will harshly kick them out. Because this came from a protective measure any they deem traitors to them or the collective is something they need to discard. If only one netherborn is betrayed someway in a pack they made will become aggressive towards the traitor if they aren’t immediately handled and kicked out. Because they would consider the person the Ulimate enemy. This is called a rage. A rage can also happen if they consider their pack at risk because of a enemy. Which again makes them protective and ride or die (COUGH ranch burning)

2. Both are very different flavors of home oriented. Avians tend to build nests as a form of courting. And usually a nest they build is very detailed. For example in the case of their partner being of another species or culture the kitchens will always be full of ingredients hailing form where they come from. Everything in that nest will be personalized to match them both perfectly. It’s literally a taboo to burn down a nesting house because of how much time and effort goes into one that calms down the avian instincts Meanwhile the version of netherborns have is dens. Instead of focusing on the detail they have a strong culture on the atmosphere. They believe that in a mateship each is equal therefore their responsibilities in the den is shared equally no matter what. They don’t strive for comfort like avians but it’s more like- anywhere with their mate is their home. But once settled they do get attached to their dens. They like to know their beloved is safe in the den. When a netherborn den is harmed can easily make them go in a rage. As they instinctively feel that is blatant threat towards them and their beloved.

3. Avians tend to court by the best way I can say is showing off. They will spread out their wings in homes their crush will say their wings are pretty. They will sing and dance in order to catch someone eye. They will make homemade gifts to show them they can make them pretty things. They will also gift shiny things as a way of showing their crush that they are thinking of them. And they eventually become very clingy and affectionate once it’s official. Netherborns rarely have a chance to court someone but when they do it’s obvious. Netherborns are open with their feelings and they show it both by words and their touch. Hence a netherborn in love will shout praise and will find any means of being affectionate with their crush. Their tails will always be hugging them. They also are really into gift giving especially of its something that was made thinking of them.

4. Both speak common but they have vocalizations they make when happy. Both can date species without happy noises but avians and netherborns in general tend to be more attracted to people that do make happy noises. It warms them up inside because their instincts know that their beloved is happy and content. And that makes them happy. Avians tend to chirp at each other as a way of saying hi or I love you. Avians also chirp when they are relaxed or sleepy. Avians also makes coos when happy. Netherborns happy noises are usually deep purs that is their way of saying I love you or I feel safe with you. Both species are heart eyes if their beloved makes happy noises because of them. (Avians and Netherborns both flirt by purposefully making said noises. It’s avian and netherborn version of saying pet names or sweet nothings to each other in common)

5. Both are sorta domestic. Avians like to care for their romantic partner. They will randomly gift their flock and their partner food to make sure they are healthy. It’s common for avians courting to make their intended so much food. Netherborns meanwhile are the same because again Nether is a harsh place so they tend to give their mate food as a form of flirting. Both tend to be good cooks.

Therefore Tango being a netherborn and Jimmy being a avian suit each other so well. They get all the romantic cues a overworlder for example would ignore or miss. Tango can immediately pick up what’s wrong or right. And same for Jimmy picking up stuff on tango end. They have similar courting methods. And have the same protectiveness towards each other. They feel strongly about the concept of a safe place to live together in. They are naturally very affectionate. Tango easy affection at Jimmy showing off avian wise makes Jimmy flustered immensely. Tango is probably the only that Jimmy ever sang or danced for and he was embrassed he wasn’t as good as his brother and flockmate Grian. But tango loved it and said so. Jimmy randomly picks up shiny stuff and puts in Tango hand. Tango being given something by his beloved tail waves and gets happy noises. Jimmy and Tango have flirt battles only using their happy vocalizations. Netherborns and avians suit each other. What can I say

#team rancher #rancher duo #sorry I’m not sorry #having a moment #I love them you don’t understand #and I love instincts where they are adorable #so here take this!#enjoy

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randynova · 4 years ago

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𝐒𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐨𝐮 𝐎𝐠𝐚𝐦𝐢 𝐍𝐒𝐅𝐖 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬 ♡ 𝐆𝐍! 𝐒/𝐎

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A.N.: I hope you enjoy these and this is what I feel would apply to Shirou. At the moment, I am not taking requests but when I do, I will announce it!

Also thank you, dear people, for liking my last NSFW headcanons! It really motivated to write this and made me feel better about my writing. I’m still gonna be inactive due to school but hey! My health is much better and I’m focusing on school at the moment.

Enjoy!

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Shiro is a 1,000 year old virgin and has no experience, but he knows a basic amount of knowledge about the world of sex and its wonders. Sort of.

But it’s only because he was so focused on the peace and happiness of his fellow beastmen that he neglected this aspect of himself. Plus, it never really came up and if it did, he got distracted with something else.

So imagine when he meets his S/O, who may or may not be experienced or know more about sex than him. If you do have experience, cool! You can show and lead him steadily into the unknown. If you don’t, that’s okay! This will be a learning experience for both of you and you’ll both be at roughly the same pace.

Shirou is mainly vanilla for a majority of the time, being interested mainly in love-making at first rather than just ‘fucking’. It takes time for him to move into having sex for other reasons; such as stress-relieving, for fun, to experiment, etc. Be patient.

At first, Shirou’s natural instincts do kick in and he’ll automatically resort to the traditional doggy-style position. But don’t worry, he does start going into other positions as more time passes.

His favorites are missionary, modified doggy-style/leapfrog, cowgirl/cowboy, and the chairman.

As time goes on, it’s discovered that Shirou is a bottom; please don’t argue with me on this. He’s between a power bottom and pillow prince. A perfect mix of wanting to show his S/O some pleasure and teasing them but also just sitting back and letting his S/O take the lead.

On the rare times that he tops, he has two preferences. Most times, he is still gentle but shows a possessive side and gets a bit rough. So prepare to be more sore than usual. I'll go more into detail in a bit. Very rarely does he get rough.

Shirou isn’t that kinky, I’m saying it now. As much as I love other fandoms, I just can’t see Shirou Ogami as being extremely kinky. He’ll have a few kinks that seem a bit extreme (no, not BDSM) but that is once he gets really comfortable with his S/O.

But keep in mind, people change and I might write him indulging in certain kinks if you guys want me to. Like, I’m pretty open-minded but for certain things.

There is a safe word and all sexual activity must stop once it’s used. Shirou decided it to be “Beast Peace” as it kind of goes with the situation; you want peace, he wants peace, we all want peace. There is also a safe word for outside use and it’s mainly used when someone is upset, the occasional arguing/fighting has gotten to be too much, or when one of them is in a dangerous or uncomfortable situation. It’s “Spring on Jupiter.”

Random SFW HC: He likes the song “Fly me to the Moon.”

Moving on, he has a praise kink. Tell him how good he’s doing, how handsome he is, how much you love him, how amazing it feels, and more. Hearing his S/O’s beautiful voice praising him in his most vulnerable state makes him feel euphoric and quite relaxed; it makes him feel loved.

He doesn’t really like dirty talk, but it’s mainly the degrading kind. His S/O can dirty talk to him only if they praise him while doing it. Once, his S/O tried the really dirty talk and he couldn’t take it, it actually hurt him a bit and he immediately stopped, using the safe-word.

If his S/O apologizes right away, he’ll forgive them. But if they don’t, he’ll be a bit cold and hurt for a while - he needs some alone time as being emotionally attacked while vulnerable made him feel threatened and attacked. He doesn’t wanna be hurt that way again.

Please, apologize right away if any slip ups do occur or else he’ll be emotionally distant for a bit.

He likes the occasional rough sex, as mentioned before. Maybe after a stressful day working to keep the peace in Beast City or just to let his pent-up emotions out somehow. This is the rare times he’ll top, like I mentioned before. He’ll ask before he does so though and if his S/O agrees, he takes them then and there. He likes doing it quick for a majority of the occasional times as he doesn't really like being rough with you.

Let’s say you’re in the library.

Shirou pulls his pants and underwear down hastily, doing the same to you as he bends you over the couch’s arm. He quickly plunges himself into you, drilling his hips at an inhuman speed and relishing in the way your walls wrapped so snugly against his pulsing cock. One hand brushes against your hips, digging his nails into your skin while the other trailed over to your nether regions. The beastman quickly began to stimulate your sacred parts, his nimble fingers working wonders and pulling sweet and sinful sounds from your mouth . God, how lucky he is to have such an amazing person as you? Very lucky he was.

His hands leave their respectful places, one of his hands moving to your head and grabbing a fistful of hair, his finger clutching locks at their root. He yanked it back with one quick move and he threw his head back in bliss.

Low growls rip from his throat, melting into soft whimpers as he picks up the pace, if it’s even possible. The quick , small moans he hears invigorates him and he releases your hair, his hands going back to their previous spots. He leans over, his hands never leaving their place as he bites your shoulder harshly. You yelp, groaning at the sensation of his teeth pricking your skin, sucking hungrily as if you were his last meal, surely leaving a dark welt.

You shiver as you feel Shirou’s hot tongue run over the area, only to repeat the process on your neck. The hand on your hip left and soon Shirou’s arm wrapped itself around your waist, pulling your bodies closer. “So beautiful,” he whispers, his thrusts beginning to get messy and erratic. “You’re so good to me, [N/N]... Ah! Ngh..” He harshly thrusted into you. Shirou’s fingers, sensational love bites, and numbing thrusts soon became too much and you felt yourself unwind. You squeeze around him and release over his hand, releasing a loud and broken moan.

Shirou whimpered, his eyebrows knitting together and his jaw tightening at the pure ecstasy he was experiencing. With a few final quick and deep thrusts, Shirou releases his seed in you and lets out a low moan. Both of you stayed in that position for a few minutes, panting and indulging in the moment. You peered over your shoulder and smiled at your lover.

“That was… something, huh?”

I feel like some people wonder if he’ll go down on his S/O in his beastman form. The answer is yes. There are occasions where he gets so into it that he transforms subconsciously/involuntarily, but there are also occasions where he does it willingly.

The high chances of him turning into a beastman is when he’s stressed, gets overwhelmed, or if his S/O asks.

Shirou’s moans are like a beautiful note being played by Apollo’s harp - absolute music to the ears. They’re soft, mellow moans that stimulate something within and they’re beautiful. Sometimes he whimpers, whines, or groans but his moans are the best.

He likes to try and stay quiet but soon the pleasure gets too much and he starts moaning a bit louder, whimpering his S/O’s name and muttering incoherent words of how he feels.

Let me get this out of the way - Shirou has howled in the bedroom before. He has howled many times in fact. But our wolfman can’t help it, I mean, you treat him like absolute royalty as you focus on his pleasure, making sure he’s satisfied no matter what. For example:

He feels himself being pushed over the edge as your velvet walls squeeze around his throbbing member, milking him for all he’s got as you bounce on his cock. Shirou’s hips wildly buck upwards, throwing his head back into the pillow whilst he shuts his eyes at the overwhelming pleasure that was enveloping his whole being. He squeezes your hips tightly, digging his nails into your delicate skin. The beastman could hear the sweet sound of your voice, purring praises of how good he was and how well he was receiving you.

Small whimpers leave him, strained moans and pants roll off his tongue, and he’s muttering your name like a mantra. The euphoric ecstasy soon gets to be too much, feeling a familiar coil start to tighten and threaten to unwind. Shirou feels your walls tighten even more around him, noticing how you bounce faster on his cock and more erratically. You lean over and bury your face into his chest, your own climax fast approaching.

Shirou growls, running his hands to your bottom and firmly grasping it, ramming his hips up at a godly speed. “Shirou, so.. Ah! So good!” You moan, everything becoming too much for you. You release a high-pitch moan, spilling your juices over your lover’s skin.

Shirou soon followed, suddenly spilling his hot seed deep into you and releasing a deep, broken and raw howl; the sound of his howl was surely heard throughout the city.

Hopefully you enjoyed that little excerpt of one of the times Shirou howled in the bedroom.

Now let’s get into the kinks.

He likes mirror sex

He absolutely loves the way your face scrunches up in pleasure, how your eyes roll back as he bucks his hips into you, bouncing as both of you chase your own climaxes.

Seeing how he can make you crumble under his touch, moan and whimper his name, making eye contact as the knot in your stomach snaps.

*mwuah* Beautiful.

He likes having sex in different locations, but rarely.

Occasionally, he likes taking you on the kitchen counter, the couch, or the floor. His top three favorite places, right next to the bedroom of course.

You look like a whole meal in the kitchen? He’ll gently take you then and there on the counter, missionary or doggy-style, your choice.

Both of you happen to get a little handsy in the living room or get bored watching a movie, both of you will get a lil’ freaky. He takes you from behind, lifting your leg a bit as he inserts you slowly.

If you want to cockwarm, he’ll absolutely go along and just lie down with you like that. His member held firmly by your velvet walls.

Listen, the only reason you guys fuck on the floor is because on some instance, both of you will fall off the bed or couch and just continue your business without moving.

He sorta likes semi-public sex.

You know how wolves have ruts and heats? Yeah, Shirou has that period of his testosterone levels rising and he goes f e r a l.

He wants to fuck you here, he wants to fuck you there, he wants to fuck you everywhere. This man needs some sort of relief, alright? However, usually his self-control is pretty good and he can hold back from pouncing you in public - most of the time.

If he can’t take it anymore and you happen to be out with him at the time, he will take you then and there. He drags you to a nearby closet or bathroom and fucks you raw, having your legs wrap around his waist as you bounce on his cock or he drills his length into you as he pushes you against the wall, thrusting and rutting until both of you reach that sweet release.

Luckily, he carries some tissues with him and cleans both of you up. He kisses your forehead and attempts to fix both of you up, trying to get rid of the fresh-sex look before either one of you step back out.

Shirou does not like to be called daddy/sir/master/etc. It makes him feel weird and uncomfortable. If his S/O tries to, he immediately shuts them down with a look, explaining how it makes him feel. He sees no point in it and rather be called by his name or a sweet nickname - he wants to keep this simple. I believe it's because he's had bad experiences with most authority figures so he feels a bit powerless and in some sort of danger.

If you want to call him that, then good luck because Shirou won’t accept it and only wants to be called by his name/nickname(s). If you don’t like it and keep pushing for it, Shirou will eventually suggest his S/O to find someone else if they can’t respect and accept the boundaries he has set.

And if you're thinking just because he's a bottom, he'll like it, you're wrong. Period.

That being said, Shirou won’t really indulge in the daddy/mommy kink, he feels uncomfortable.

He has a biting kink. Shirou Ogami loves biting his S/O and leaving marks on their skin; it gives him a primal sense of intimacy. He won't do it right away though, he'll reveal it later in the relationship.

Shiro loves grazing his teeth against your skin, nibbling it before sinking his teeth in, and sucking the soft flesh until he leaves a noticeable red welt behind.

The moans you make as he makes one feels him with pride and love.

Oh but hey! He loves them too! When his S/O gives him his own markings, he can't help but whimper and hold them close, feeling so happy that you, his mate, has decided to grace him with.

Now you may be wondering, "hey, does shirou have a breeding kink since he's a wolf??"

Oh yeah, definitely. He has a breeding kink and wishes nothing more than to fill you to the brim with his cum if it means there's a chance you'll carry his pups. Even if his S/O can't have children, he still enjoys the thought of filling them up.

However, he is pretty shy about it and usually pulls out. If you two are using protection, he'll unload and just toss the condom in the trash.

Shirou is still gentle, he’ll only turn it up a notch if you beg him to reorganize your guts and milk him for all you got.

Oh, aftercare? Don’t worry! Shirou has already got that covered. He’s already carrying you to the bathroom, running a nice hot bath for you and rummaging through the fridge for your favorite snacks. He returns and gently helps you bathe yourself. Once both of you are done, he carries you to your shared bed and pulls out your fav snacks, letting you happily eat them as he goes to take a quick shower. He joins you in bed soon afterwards and starts to softly rub all the places he hurt, muttering small apologies and praises.

He turns into his beastman form as he knows you love cuddling into his fluff, especially after sex.

Remember how I said he likes “Fly Me to The Moon”? You two hum the song after sex, especially after a rough, draining session.

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©𝚛𝚊𝚗𝚍𝚢𝚗𝚘𝚟𝚊 || 𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝚛𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝𝚜 𝚛𝚎𝚜𝚎𝚛𝚟𝚎𝚍 || 𝚗𝚘 𝚝𝚛𝚊𝚗𝚜𝚕𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜, 𝚎𝚍𝚒𝚝𝚜, 𝚌𝚘𝚙𝚢𝚒𝚗𝚐, 𝚛𝚎𝚙𝚘𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐, 𝚎𝚝𝚌. 𝚞𝚗𝚍𝚎𝚛 𝚊𝚗𝚢 𝚌𝚒𝚛𝚌𝚞𝚖𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚗𝚌𝚎𝚜.

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apileofenby · 4 years ago

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I cannot fit this into my WIP because,,,,,y’know,,,,,,,plot (if it can be called that), so I’m dumping it on tumblr instead

“Techno, can you do anything with your hair?” Tommy asked, glaring at him from across the table.

Techno self–consciously ran his fingers through his ponytail. He’d only spent two months in the army before he’d left at the ripe old age of thirteen, refusing to fight for a cause he didn’t believe in. He’d left with his hair just above his shoulders, and the only thing he’d been able to do with it was tie it back with a leather band. During his three years on the run, it had never really occurred to him to cut it—in fact, he’d grown to rather like it—but running alone had never given any opportunities to learn fancy new hairstyles.

He felt his cheeks burn as Wilbur kicked Tommy under the table, muttering “don’t be rude.”

“No. Surprisingly, Tommy, between the Nether, the army, and being a wanted mercenary, I never got the opportunity to play dress up,” Techno said, putting a little more bite behind his words than was required.

“Alright, Big Man, I didn’t mean anything by it. Well, I did, which was—do you want me to teach you?”

Techno narrowed his eyes—in the two weeks he’d been living with him, the biggest thing he’d learned was that Tommy always loved a good prank. “Teach me what?”

“How to braid your hair. Trust me, it holds a lot better than your tails—and is more comfortable, apparently.”

Techno looked at Wilbur, who shrugged. “He used to practise on our mother’s hair, before…” Wilbur trailed off, eyes unfocusing for a second. “I don’t know if he still can, though, so it’s your choice.”

Techno thought about the sheer amount of times his hair had come loose in battle, and then the strands already pulling loose. He took out the band, massaging the part of his head that ached from the ponytail and combing out the hair with his fingers. “As long as you’re just braiding it…I don’t see why not.”

Tommy grinned, up in an instant. “God, I haven’t done this in forever. I hope I don’t accidentally knot your hair—” Tommy raised his hands and backed away as Techno stood, one hand on his sword. “It was a joke, Techno. I’m not that bad.”

Techno watched him warily, before sitting in the chair again. He tensed as Tommy’s fingers first touched his hair, surprisingly gentle as they untangled the knots. He hadn’t let anyone touch his hair in…

A gentle laugh, bright in the dim redness of the Nether.

“I don’t know how you have such long hair, at such a young age,” Techno’s mother said, running her hands through it. “And such a vibrant colour, too! You don’t get this sort of beauty in the Nether.”

Techno didn’t say anything, but smiled at the red walls of their house. She pulled his hair into a tight bun, before patting his cheek.

“So that it doesn’t interfere with training.”

“Thanks, mom,” Techno drawled, rolling his eyes, but unable to keep the smile away from his lips.

The bun had held true, all the way through training.

Through the General’s questions, as he watched Techno spar.

It had held, right until the General had taken a knife to it without warning.

When Technoblade had emerged from the bloodlust, his hands were red, and clutching a leather band.

Techno shut his eyes, pushing the emotions down, as Tommy ran his fingers through Techno’s hair again.

“So you see, Techno, you take a section up here, at the top, and split it into three. Then you tuck this one under…”

Techno tuned out Tommy’s words—he was sure Tommy could tell him again after—and allowed him to continue down his head, pulling sections into the braid until it dangled down his back, reaching his waist.

“Your hair tie, Techno?”

Techno fingered the leather band, currently wrapped around his wrist, then looked at Tommy—who had seen Techno in that dirty alley, seen past the blades and the words and trusted him enough to bring him to Wil and Phil, who had treated him like family despite only knowing him two weeks.

Techno handed over the leather band.

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yanderemommabean · 4 years ago

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Imagine seeing a 🦊 in your backyard and being like “😮Cute 🦊?!” And you try, despite advise telling you otherwise, to befriend it. Cause who doesn’t want a 🦊 friend? So you leave lil homemade treats for it everytime you see it. (It seems to prefer human and cooked foods?) and eventually you find it in your house and you’re like “❤️!” And let the fox sleep in your room and wake up with Lee in your bed. Like, you got the pet/owner relationship you wanted but not quite in the way you thought.-🦝

There’s a list of things you expected when you allowed your new friend to sleep in your bed. Maybe they chewed up the blankets, made a mess in the floor because they’re nervous, and even a shredded pillow was expected.

You would’ve preferred all of the above when your bleary eyes focused in on a much larger form than a fox, who was happily looming over you. The man was blond, his face covered in freckles with warm hazel eyes that continued examining your features.

Great. You were definitely about to die. Couldn’t he do you the courtesy of doing it while you were asleep? That’s at least the best way to go!

“What the-“ you managed to croak out, still sleepy and trying to wake up from your haze. You press up on your hands, trying to sit up and shove the man off of you, becoming more aware of the dangerous situation as sleep left your brain.

Fuck. FUCK. A stranger was in your house! IN YOUR BED!

“No! No please don’t kill me!” You begin to plead, scrambling out of bed and searching the room for anything to defend yourself with as your “attacker” just silently watched, seemingly amused. His grin was cocky, and his naked form only seemed laxed and confident as he watched your confusion escalate.

“My my, if You’re this entertaining by just waking up, I’d say I’ve found myself a lucky one”.

You press yourself against the wall, eyes wide as you struggle to ask the man what he meant- what he thought he was doing in your home. Your bed. He simpers and makes no gesture to cover his nether regions, simply pressing his fingers to his chin as he looked you up and down.

“It seems I’ve frightened you. Apologies, most humans hardly see me out of my cuddly little persona. It’s a pleasure to be on speaking terms with you now”. He gave another cocky expression, eyebrows raised in a waiting manner as he extended his hand for you to shake.

“What the hell are you talking about? G-get out of my house!” You pathetically shout, voice wavering as you tried to piece together whatever in the world was going on. What ‘persona’? Why did he say it like he wasn’t human himself? Was he on drugs?!

Ok- deep breaths! Panicking is natural but it never helps in any situation. He clearly hasn’t hurt you yet, and if he planned too, he was taking his time. You don’t need to put yourself in any corners. You straighten up and try to make some distance between him and you, clearing your throat as you try and think of what to say.

“Ah. You’re still lost. It’s quite adorable honestly” the man mused, refusing to acknowledge the fact you told him to leave. “My name is Lee-“ he gestured towards his body “I’m-for lack of a better term, a werefox. A shapeshifter, cursed, whichever you seem fit to label”.

Your mouth goes dry, and your cheeks heat up seeing that -yeah he’s still naked. “I-I’m sorry but that’s an absolute asinine claim. Please just- just leave my house before I call the police”. You advert your eyes as his gaze darkens, and his much larger form presses closer to you.

“Oh? Asinine is it? Tell me, what makes you think such creatures don’t exist?” He questioned while furrowing his brows. With a scoff you raise your eyebrows in defense, and throw up your hands slightly. “Gee let me think- the fact that DNA probably wouldn’t allow that, not to mention much more science behind it. Listen I don’t have to explain anything! This isn’t a joke I’m calling the police!”.

You push him aside to grab your phone, but before you can so much as press the home button, you hear a low growl, and are met with the fuzzy face of a fox. A pause fills the room, your eyes locked on the creature as it pads over to you and nuzzles your arm, wanting affection. However cute the thing was, you felt a sinking in your stomach. You notice the man was no longer standing around, and it didn’t take a genius to do the math.

Oh fuck. OH FUCK THIS IS REAL. There’s a god damn shapeshifter in your house and apparently you’re now in absolutely skepticism of everything you’ve ever been taught. “Hoh my God-“ you breathed out, dropping the phone back down and stepping away with hands covering your mouth. You watched on as Lee transformed back, his naked body pressed against the crumpled sheets and blankets of your bed. He gives a wink, and all you can do is slide down the wall and stare in disbelief and awe.

“Oh I do hope you have more original questions than the others. Although, if not, I don’t mind answering. It’s a long story but needless to say, demons are real and if you fuck one over, they hold a grudge for life”. He beamed a cheeky smile, as if this was all some joke. Seriously? Can you have one day where you don’t question the very state of your being and existence?

Suddenly more pressing matters dawn on you. Like how you baby talked him and fed him by hand. And how you kissed his face and called him a good boy. Oh Jesus Christ this is embarrassing!

“I...you let me...baby talk you and...oh god” you mewled, burying your face in your knees as embarrassed redness covered your cheeks.

Goodness you looked so cute like this. You looked cute all of the time really, but seeing you flustered always made him want to see more. He’s glad he gets to own you now, seeing as you’ve clearly taken an interest in him! Why else would you take care of him?

“Oh yes. I do enjoy your nicknames for me! And I must say, since my curse has been given, you’re the first human I’ve wanted to own without ill intent. The others were messy but fun while they lasted”.

He admires the shock in your eyes as you soak in more horrifying information. You always have the most enrapturing expressions! He could get lost in your eyes for days by themselves! Such a pleasant distraction!

He rests his head in his hand and stares at you with adoring eyes, kicking his legs a bit while silence once again took over the room. “What’s the matter? Fox got your tongue?” He teased, swiping his pink tongue over his canines with a seductive wink.

“You...killed others? Oh god I’m next?!” You squeaked “and you said you own me? How the hell did you come to that conclusion?!”.

“Simple. You’re kind, you’re warm, you have patience and tenacity, you have the cutest interests in the oddest of things, you fed me, and you captured my heart. Once you allow me in your home I’m fully able to show myself, and once that’s done? Well, I can do whatever I please with you.”

“So you’re gonna kill me?” You asked as your blood ran cold, but you couldn’t find it in yourself to reach for your phone once again. Why bother if he’s quite literally as quick as a fox.

“What? No! No never! My other toys where ugly on the inside and made me want to rid the world of their existence. You? Well I can’t let this world harm such a beautiful creature. You’re clearly in need of me, and I’m more than happy to spray the woods with blood if it means I get to keep you with me”.

He sits up, and slides off the bed to meet you on the floor, his fingers shaking slightly as they touch your wrists, feeling you flinch and recoil. Now that won’t do! But he supposed you were patient with him, so he can return the favor when it comes to touches.

“You don’t own me” you whisper half heartedly. You knew by the power the man held alone that you had no say in that matter, but whats life without a bit of spite? You weren’t going to just swoon and submit!

“I think we both know that’s not true. You let me in, and I get to stay. And as a plus I get to make you see just how badly you need me. You’ll learn that this is a good thing, I promise! Now why don’t you come up off the floor? The bed is much more comfortable”.

-Mommabean (was this alright?)

#dr lee my oc #werefox #wereanimal #yandere exophilia #kinda #hes naked #so #yandere doctor lee #doctor lee my oc #yandere scenarios #yandere imagines #my ocs #yandere doctor #yandere male #yandere #mommabean #racoon bean

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witchynyx · 6 years ago

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Essential Oils: A Cautionary Tale

So while I'm obsessive about safely when it comes to other people, I tend to not be so cautious when it comes to myself.

After a particularly bad pain day + menstrual cramps + a SUPER stressful/exhausting work day, I decided a soak was in order.

I've started running my bath, lit my candles, turned on the fairy lights, added a heap of lavender oil to my Epsom salts, and then remembered I have some peppermint kicking around somewhere. I'll just free-pour about a mL, it's pretty skin-safe (and my skin is fine with things), it'll be fine...

[Narrator]: It would not be fine.

I got into my bath around halfway full, and noticed it was smelling more strongly of peppermint than I was expecting. No worries. Oh and a bit of that cool menthol feeling on my legs. Fine. And on my nethers. Ok. And a bit much...

This is the point at which the part of my brain with a chemistry background starts going "watch out for chemical burns!" and grabs some soap. No difference. Bath tap off, shower tap on, more soap. No difference. Anxious brain kicks in. Sneak past my sleeping partner to the proper shower. Shower gel. Soap. More shower gel. More soap. Do I go to the hospital? How embarrassing! More shower gel. More soap. Out and dry, no difference.

Google. Results: "How to treat burns with essential oil!" No! Suggestions on a Q&A board: aloe vera, carrier oil. Don't wanna go on my balcony naked at 9pm, coconut oil it is.

A little better. Enough that it's into the realm of "going to be fine" and my anxiety brain is settling down.

So folks, do as I say, not as I do.

Be safe with essential oils.

They may be natural, but that doesn't mean they're not strong and (potentially) dangerous chemicals. And this is the friendly end!

Maybe I'll try again tomorrow night...

#original content #witchynyx #witchcraft #safety #essential oils #bath magic

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votederpycausemufins · 4 years ago

Text

So, happy eggs benedict day to those who watch dsmp. I’m sure you’ll have fun today! I know I will when you all read this chapter and freak out at the end! also gonna apologize for the formatting. I wasn’t sure how to replicate what I did while writing it, so I’m doing that instead.

@petrichormeraki

“Hey Tommy?” Phil took the teen over to the side, wanting to speak with him. “Since Grian is still talking with his admin-”

“He’s my admin too. You saw that the other me was in their world.”

“Right, fine. While he’s talking to your admin, I’ve got a question.”

“Alright, shoot.”

“When you were talking with that other you… D-Did Kristen show up?”

“Mumza? Uh, no. Why d’ya ask?”

“Well, I guess you wouldn’t know. She wasn’t really around when you were growing up. But she’s sort of… a goddess of death.”

Tommy’s eyes widened. “She’s what?”

“Yeah.”

“Yeah, no. Mumza didn’t show up. You did. Or the other version of you. I guess you’re the death god there instead of her.”

“Right. Well, anything else happen, mate?”

“After the other you showed up, the other me got taken away by him and told me the thing to say to Xannes.”

“Alright. Thanks for telling me Tommy.”

“Theseus. Theeeeeeeseus. Theseus! Wake up!”

“Ugh… where am I?”

“Prison. Specifically Base Iridium.”

Theseus shook his head to wake himself up more. “Wait where the fuck am I?!”

“I just said you’re-”

“No what the fuck is this?!” Theseus shouted and tried moving around, only making the sound of chains jingling.

“Ohhhh, enchanted bedrock casket to make sure you can’t move. But hey, At least we get face holes. Aaaand you’re hyperventilating.”

“How do I get out?! Let me out!”

“If I knew how to get out, I would have aaaaaages ago and gone to see Sense!”

“W-Wait, S-Sense like the e-evil r-redstone guy?”

“Yes! With a wonderful mustache and sexy suit of his~”

“Oh eww gross. You’re just as bad as him.” Theseus cringed.

“How’s he doing?”

“Half starved to death and had his vocal cords ripped out.”

“He. What.”

“The new emperor of Helscraft or whatever did it. Kicked him off the throne and trapped him in whatever was there instead of the nether.”

“No! Now I need to get out!” Chain rattling filled the air.

“Uh hey, what’s your name by the way?”

There was a pause from the rattling. “Oh you heard I changed it? It’s Grifter now.”

“Uh, didn’t know you started with anything else.”

“Hiii Puffy! I’m baaack! Did you an’ Grum talk about stuff?” Jrum walked into Puffy’s home holding a lot of quartz in his arms. He knew he could just put it in his inventory, but this was more fun.

“Yes we did, though… well it was a little rough for him, so he’s... out building a place for you to stay near your charger until you can get home, alright?”

Jrum nodded, accepting the answer without question before setting his haul down on a table and picking up a piece quartz to chew on. “I made a new friend! His name is Michael!”

“Oh, that sounds nice.”

“Yeah! And then I went exploring and I found a big cave!”

“In the nether?” Puffy asked, only half paying attention right now while hoping Jrum would get distracted talking. She knew the bot’s brother wasn’t really out building after his panic attack, but duckling Dream had been kind and offered to help the child.

“It looked kinda like it, but no. It kinda looked like something Uncle Scar would make. It was pretty. He once built a humongous drill to get to the nether. A-And then some of the nether started climbing out, but the hole was waaaaay too big so it didn’t have any chance!”

“That sounds creative.”

“Yeah! He also made a magic village with a big magic crystal, and apparently it helps connect to the hels dimension, so I made a friend there!”

“What’s that?” Puffy asked with a tilt of her head.

“Oh, the hels dimension is a place parallel to this dimension, but it’s not like another dimension like the overworld and the nether are different dimensions to themselves, hels is like… us, but through a mirror! A funhouse mirror! Like my daddy is really good at redstone like me, and he can get frazzled at times, but he’s really nice. But then there’s the hels version of him who’s like a big mean evil scientist!”

“Oh really. And I suppose you made friends with your hels version?” Puffy asked with a small smile, but Jrum frowned and found his antenna to tug on, squeezing the little blue ball at the end.

“Uh, no. Grum and I were built by our dads, but in hels, they got separated and so they couldn’t build us. So… we don’t have our own hels versions.”

Puffy frowned sadly. “Do you want to talk about that?

“Yeah. I’ve tried telling my dads, but they just sort of reassure me without really listening.”

Puffy got a chair set up for Jrum, ready for an impromptu therapy session which she hoped wouldn’t end as bad as the last one. “Now, what’s bothering you most?”

“Well, the fact that we don’t have our other versions kinda hurts because it sort of makes me feel like we’re less real. I know my dads say that we’re of course real, but it doesn’t hurt less because they just sort of say it and not give reasons. In fact, they sort of give us less reasons because they were really protective about us respawning since they didn’t know how that would work. I mean, I guess they had a reason to worry since Grum and me are here now, but the fact they couldn’t trust us with that kinda hurts.

“And then we need to be charged up as well as eat, but we don’t need to worry about phantoms. I guess it’s a trade off, but no one else has to deal with that! It feels weird! From what Xisuma said, he needed to mess with some files to get us read properly by all his admin stuff, and he didn’t need to do that for others sort of like us, so why are we different?!”

Puffy hugged Jrum to comfort the now crying robot. The small whispers of reassurance helped a little, telling him he really was a person and that he would be safe. Jrum was glad for them he didn’t like the mess he was in, and the fact that it came from not really being a person made it sting even worse. So he was very happy to find someone who would listen and understand.

System hard drive crash. Attempting recovery. Recovering… Recovering… 92% of data recovered. Rebooting… Rebooting… Essential data missing. Please insert external drive for troubleshooting.

External drive connected. Reading external data. 16 files located. Do you wish to replace data with files? Backing up old files. Backing up… Backing up… Data has been backed up. Replacing data. Replacing… Replacing… Replacement complete. Restarting. One moment.

Restart complete. Checking systems. 100% data found. Implementing… Implementing… Files implemented.

Are you sure you want to rename this machine? Renaming… Renaming… Renaming complete. Restart needed to fully implement. Restarting. One moment.

Welcome. Please continue with s s s set u u up. Ch ch choose a l l lan. :)

Grumbot sat up with a start. He was pretty sure if he wasn’t a robot, he’d be breathing heavily. He put a hand to his head before looking around. It looked like he had been put in a room with a bed, but he didn’t recognize it, and no one else was there.

Grum tried to remember what happened. Had he run out of battery? Or had he gotten damaged. No, he had been trying to [: )] and it didn’t work out. He had also been with Puffy, so perhaps this was another room in her house. It wasn’t one he had seen before, but he also hadn’t really gone exploring.

Getting up from the bed and stretching, Grum decided to do just a little bit of looking around the room to make sure this really was Puffy’s place. He didn’t want to end up in someone else’s place and get in trouble. Though perhaps it was a similar situation to [: )] when they showed up on [: )].

That was another thing he almost forgot. Jrum. Was he okay? He didn’t know how long they had been separated and if it were long enough, he could have gotten in trouble. He had always taken after their [: )] and if the people here weren’t the happiest about stuff like that, it might not end well.

Well, as he looked around, the place seemed safe, and after carefully breaking a piece of the wall before putting it back, he was still at Puffy’s home. He attempted to contact Jrum, but it seemed that function wasn’t working. Possibly because they were no longer in [: )] and it was something there that allowed a direct connection between the two of them.

Grum’s eyes landed on a piece of paper he hadn’t noticed before. It seemed to be a note of sorts, so he read it. It seemed to be from the admin. He wrote how Puffy said Grum passed out and she went to check on Jrum to make sure the same didn’t happen to him. That if he would like, the admin could check him over and make sure everything was fine and there were no programming issues.

The robot rolled his eyes. He wouldn’t have any issues. [: )] and [: )] had built him just fine, Plus Jrum had gotten the two of them updates from [: )] so they were even better. There was no reason to see the admin, especially because…

Because…

Because why? This person was the admin, so he would just be making sure the server ran as smoothly as possible. He likely was just worried. That was all. What admin wouldn’t? And they hadn’t done anything to make Grum think otherwise. If they did, then maybe he would need to be wary. But so far, nothing.

Puffy suggested they get a treat for Jrumbot to help him cheer up and Jrum wiped away his virtual tears before following her. As they left, neither of them noticed the small red plant wrapping around the antenna and connecting to the now red ball on the end of it.

“Ah ha. Nice joke Theseu- wait a second.” There was silence. “You’re not my brother.”

#hermit!tommy au #hermit!tommy #tommyinnit #grian #philza #avian!Grian #watcher!grian #grian xelqua #hels!grian #hels!tommy #jrumbot #captain puffy #grumbot #dreamwastaken #still not a fan of how dream's persona eminates someone... problematic #the blood vines

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jinxpologist · 3 years ago

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spooky boy RIGHTS

I enjoy horror and phantombur is so offputting but not actively hostile/malevolent that it makes for a really fun character to play with!! phantoms being so closely associated with death but also the night is lovely symbolism especially with phantombur's fascination with recording and safekeeping history which mmmm a stereotypical harbinger of death keeping records of life

YOU ARE SO RIGHT AND SO BASED OMFG YEAH like. okay some quick analysis of phantoms because i love them and they make me lose it.

1) he's heavily implied to be dead/have died before (refers to himself as a ghost) so like. what are they gonna do with that. what the fuck happened to him. did wilbur actually die? is being a phantom normal? phantoms are undead mobs, as classified by the fact that they have the same rules with potions and the wither/smite as other undead. why are they phantoms and not regular undead? what were they before?

2) phantoms are connected to death very obviously bc they're. you know. phantoms. but the night symbolism really gets me. the night, a shadow over the world, something terrifying to most. in minecraft, the night is to be feared and fought and escaped, but it's where wilbur and other phantoms are safe and at home. he lives in the dark crevices that others cannot reach or do not want to reach.

3) INSOMNIA???? can we talk about how fucking terrifying and confusing phantoms are in the aspect that they appear after 3 days of no sleep, meaning they are not so coincidentally spawned right when hallucinations from sleep deprivation kick in. people seeing phantoms have no way of telling if the phantoms are real. are they real? are they not? are they somewhere in between? what even are these fuckers? we have a reasonable explanation for the origins/homes of most mobs, besides the walking undead, but they've long been incorporated into the lore as just the way things work. where the hell do phantoms come from? why are they here?

4) if you die before the three day requirement has been met, phantoms will not spawn. phantoms treat death as a form of sleep.

5) they have the same color scheme as creatures from the end. however, phantoms are never seen in the end. they're never seen anywhere except for the sky. once again, where do they belong? what is their nature? they are not ender mobs, clearly, and they're not from the nether. but i can't say they're native to the overworld, either. their structure, colors, etc. are just... too alien to make sense.

6) phantoms don't drown or lose speed in water. ???? i have no idea what this means. i'm so confused. i’ve chosen to believe they’re all good swimmers tho. not really an analysis thing i just love that for them

#uhhhhhh #idk what to tag this #ask to tag i'm so sorry if there's something i should tag but didn't #horror #just to be safe #ask #scarlet-mangata

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ffakc · 4 years ago

Text

Puppy Love - a Jeffrey Dean Morgan fanfiction

@negans-attagirl @iluvneganandjamie @happysgal

It was a partly cloudy, brisk spring day. It was just warm enough to go without a jacket here in upstate New York. Jeff and I had planned the perfect day date on his property. We have been together about seven months now and life couldn’t be more perfect. I had just finished up packing our Mediterranean inspired spread. I snapped a quick photo and sent it to my Jeffrey.

“Italian subs, Greek pasta salad, roasted red pepper hummus with pita bread, baklava, and tiramisu. Anything else? I’ll see you soon!”

“Stomach’s growling already. I’ll be out back, just let yourself in. Xxx.”

I shoved some toiletries and comfortable clothes in my overnight bag. I snapped the picnic basket shut and headed to my car. Any time I thought about my Jeffrey, my whole body buzzed with excitement. I felt like pinching myself, Jeff was my dream come true. He was everything I ever wanted and needed.

I pulled up to Jeff’s farmhouse. His front door was unlocked like he said it would be. Honey’s “woo-woo-woo!” adorable howl-bark echoed through the house.

“Hi, Honey! Where’s Daddy?” I ask her and ruffle her scraggly ears, her teddy bear like eyes closing in bliss. She scampered to the back door and I follow her to the massive pastures. Jeff was tossing hay over the fence to the donkeys.

“Paxton, buddy! Leave some for the rest of them! Good lord, you pig!” Jeff laughs and turns to me. “Hey, baby!” I set the picnic basket down and fling my arms around his neck with a kiss.

“I’ve missed you,” I rest my forehead against his.

“I’ve missed you more, doll. I’ve also missed your cooking, sweet girl,” Jeff smiles. He looked so damn good in his farming clothes, redefining the phrase “ruggedly handsome” with his cuffed flannel and salt and pepper scruff. His top buttons were undone, exposing his masculine chest hair and the few necklaces he wore daily. Bandit came bounding over and jumped between us.

“Hey, boy!” I laugh.

“Someone doesn’t like me getting all the attention!” Jeff exclaims. “I can’t get a hug from my girlfriend? Rude!” he teases the fluffy monster. “Do you see that huge tree over yonder?”

“It’s beautiful,” I reply, clutching the basket so the dogs don’t get a snack.

“That’s the spot,” Jeff takes me by the hand and we make our way across the property. The alpacas stared at us intensely.

“Are they going to spit on me?” I joke.

“I told them to stay on their best behavior because we had a guest coming!” Jeff gestured to the checkered blanket he had laid out and ice bucket with a bottle of sparkling wine and two glasses. He opens up the basket and cracks open the hummus, dipping his finger in and licking it.

“At least grab some bread, you animal,” I playfully punch his shoulder, ripping off a piece of pita and dunking it in the rust orange colored deliciousness.

“Sorry, Mom,” Jeff jokes. “Wow! Is that homemade?” I nod. “Delicious, absolutely delicious. Ooh, I like the little bite to it!” I take the sandwiches out of the wax paper. “Ah, ah, ah! Go on! Get!” Jeff scolds and shoos the dogs away. “You’d think I never feed them or something!”

“I don’t mean to brag, but I made the pesto mayo on these sandwiches too,” I say, sipping my wine. I take a bite of the chilled, tangy pasta salad.

Jeff sinks his teeth into the sub. “Baby, that’s so fucking good,” he rolls his eyes back in pleasure with a mouthful of food. I kiss his cheek sweetly. “God, you sure know how to treat your Daddy right. I don’t deserve you, you know that? You’re too damn good for me, sweetheart.”

“Oh hush,” I kiss my boyfriend. He closes his eyes and deepens the kiss, running his fingers through my hair. Jeff’s eyes shoot open at the sound of Bandit barking loudly.

“Hey guys!” Jeff calls out to the puppies. “Those aren’t dogs, they’ll kick the shit out of you!” they weave in and out of the alpacas’ legs. We eat our meal and laugh as they pant wildly and chase each other all over. I pack everything neatly back into the picnic basket. Dark clouds begin forming in the distance.

“I admire their energy!” I remark, rubbing Jeff’s knee and finishing off my drink.

“I know, right? My ‘get up and go’ got up and went years ago! I swear, the moment I hit forty, my body sounds like Rice Krispies when I get out of bed,” Jeff chuckles and kisses my forehead.

“What are you, eighty?” I tease.

“Hey, you’ll get there someday, youngin! You agreed to date an old fogey! Shit, I feel a few raindrops, maybe we should head inside. But first,” Jeff rises to his feet and suddenly pulls out a pocket knife.

“What are you doing?” I stare at him, puzzled.

“You’ll see,” Jeff says. He carves into the tree. “Ah, there we go.” There was a heart with our initials in it. Three magic words escaped his lips, “I love you.”

“Jeffrey,” I sigh as thunder rolls above my head. That was the first time either of us had said that and it felt so... right. I stand up and wrap my arms around Jeff’s neck, his cowboy boots making him tower over me. He places his cowboy hat on my head with a grin. “I love you too.” The rain suddenly began pouring down.

“I’ve always wanted to do this. Kiss me in the rain, pretty girl,” Jeff pulls me against him as our clothes get soaked. My heart flutters in my chest. I never wanted to let him go. He picks me up and I wrap my legs around his waist. Jeffrey made my life feel like a cheesy romantic movie and I loved every single minute of it. A crack of thunder scares the dogs away and Jeff sets me down.

“I think that’s our cue to go inside,” I chuckle. Jeff grabs the picnic basket and extends his hand.

“Run!” he shouts as if we were in an action movie and laughs. He takes me by the hand and we trample through the mud to the farmhouse. The dogs shake and run around the living room. I hang Jeff’s hat on a hook by the door and he drops the picnic basket on the counter. He takes me into his arms and kisses me deeply.

“I love you, I love you. God damn it, I fucking love you,” Jeff whispers against my lips. I run my fingers through his sopping wet hair. “I used to think ‘love at first sight’ was a myth before I met you. If I don’t get to put a ring on that finger of yours, I don’t even want to get married, baby girl.”

“I can’t wait for that day. I love you too,” I sigh longingly, looking into Jeff hazel eyes. I press my lips to his and push him against the kitchen counter, a groan escaping his lips as I rub myself against the crotch of his pants.

“Mmm, going to make me make a mess in these jeans like a teenager,” he chuckles, “God, I want you so bad,” he begins removing his belt.

“Take me, Jeff,” I whimper. Jeff pulls my skinny jeans down aggressively and bends me over the counter. Thunder rolls outside as the cold granite against my stomach gives me chills.

“Look at these lacy black panties,” Jeff growls, “Someone knew Daddy would be fucking her good.” His words instantly make me even more aroused. Jeff’s slender fingers slide over my outer lips, slowly brushing over my clit, “So wet and I’ve hardly touched you. That’s my good girl.” I whine as Jeff slides in with a gasp. He grabs my hair with one hand as his thrusts start gentle and rhythmic. “Oh god, baby doll. You feel so good.”

“Right there, Daddy,” I moan. My older man knows just the right spots to hit.

“That’s it, baby. Take all of me,” Jeff groans as he goes deeper. He pulls my hair and rasps in my ear, “Whose pussy is this?”

“Yours,” I can barely speak, my legs are shaking.

“I can’t fuckin’ hear you, sugar,” he nibbles my neck as sexy smacking sounds fill my ears. “Whose pussy is this?” Jeff moans a little louder.

“Yours, Jeff!” I exclaim. “My body belongs to you, Jeffrey! Oh god, fuck me!” I gasp.

“I love when you beg for me,” Jeff remarks. “I’m so close already, sweetheart. I love you so much.”

“I love you,” I reply. He flips me over as the lights flicker with a loud crash of thunder.

“Look at me,” Jeff cups my cheek and kisses me. “Oh Princess, you’re beautiful,” he gasps. “I’m going to- oh sweet Jesus, baby doll!” a deep growl resonates in his chest as he finishes deep inside me. I whimper as my nether regions throb, leaking with Jeffrey’s hot, sticky juices. “You’re mine,” he smirks.

“And you’re mine,” I pant, scratching his gray beard as he rests his forehead against mine. I scan over Jeff’s gorgeous face, everything about this man was absolutely beautiful. He peels me off the counter and his lips crash into mine.

“Forever and always, my gal,” Jeff sighs lovingly.

#denny duquette #fanfic #fanfiction #greys anatomy #jeffrey dean morgan #negan #the walking dead #older man younger woman #john winchester #supernatural

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that-yandere-life · 4 years ago

Note

Ooo what about Bruce Banner on the list?

[Thank you so much for helping me celebrate! I hope that you enjoy, and that this is what you were looking for! PS: I know in canon he isn’t supposed to be able to have sex at all, but I altered it because fuck it, it’s fanfiction.]

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Bruce is a genius in the classroom, and in the bedroom. Already having everything on hand ready to be used at any time. Plus is huge on cuddling afterward, needing to have that skin to skin closeness.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Favorite part of his: Is it too cliche to say his mind? Having the knowledge of what makes you tick, or what kind of new things to try to accomplish the goal at hand. Even the ability to absorb new information if you should want to attempt something specific.

Favorite part of yours: Without trying to sound creepy, your soft skin. This man is touch starved so he will desperately be wanting to soak up whatever affection you give him. This includes during the act of love making, the sensation of nothing between the two of you makes him feel safer than he ever has.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Unfortunately or fortunately depending upon how you look at it, he can’t have children due to the accident. This however means that he can cum inside of you as much as he wants and it wouldn’t cause you any worry where you might have before.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Really into cockwarming, either inside of you or in your mouth depending on what you will do for him. It’s an intimate act that he truly enjoys as it gives him the feeling like the two of you are one.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Limited to Moderate experience, as he has always been that little nerd boy his whole life. That isn’t to say that it wasn’t someone’s thing, and that he is a virgin either. Knows more about what he is doing for his ability to understand you, and what makes you feel good.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Spooning position with him behind you holding your back to his torso as he ruts up into you. Gripping your hip with his other hand for leverage, while kissing and nipping at the tender flesh on your neck.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

It depends on how passionate the moment is, if you are both in it deep it won’t be very silly at all no matter what happens. But if the two of you are engaging in a soft lazy love making session he can break his outward serious demeanor to laugh with you when silly things happen.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Oftentimes he gets too busy to get a haircut, letting his curly locks become overgrown until you force him to go get it tamed. Likely that will be the outcome for his nether regions as well, so don’t expect to always have things prim and proper down there.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Very romantic, wanting you to always hear how much he loves and cares about you. Grew up in an abusive household, so he never wants to treat you the same way his dad treated his mom. He wants to be way better than that, so he will adjust his behavior towards that goal extensively.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Used to do it pretty often as it was a way to work out his frustration in a way that would allow for him not to hulk out. Does it less often as he has definitely mellowed out some as a result of having you in their lives.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Food play, in that he loves incorporating whipped cream, chocolate sauce, strawberries, champagne, or anything like that into some of your more playful experiences. Basically it is his way of worshiping you as he cleans you head to toe. ;)

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

The lab, especially if it is three am and the two of you are deliriously tired the entire time. The thrill of it being semi public, and the idea that Tony could (and occasionally does) catch you at any moment adds to the pleasure.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

You, wearing his lab coat, or his glasses. It will immediately turn him on, and he will need to take care of it sooner rather than later. Especially if you use them to tease him when there are others around, it will be sheer torture.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Bruce isn’t a fan of crowded places in his regular life, so it is not something he would want to deal with in his private life. He would rather it be in a safe and well known place where you can control the circumstances.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Prefers to give first and foremost, loving the feeling of you falling apart due to his actions. Knowing just how to make you see white, making deliberate actions with his tongue. However he also enjoys when you occasionally sneak under his desk in the lab for a little play time, never willing to turn you away.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

More of the slow and sensual kind of guy, he can’t let his heart rate get too high in fear of the other guy making an appearance. If he does start to get too into it, you may have to calm him down before you can continue.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Not a fan of them, he wants to be able to take his time with you first of all. Second of all he can’t exert himself too much as it is a risk for the both of you.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Will take risks in certain ways, such as trying new toys or positions. Will not take risks that could lead to either of you getting hurt, be by the hulk, or by other means.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

He lasts long enough to make you both cum at least once, but after resting can go for multiple rounds. Needing to bring his heart rate back to a resting pace to truly be able to go again.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Likely wouldn’t have owned any toys before meeting you, but is more than willing to try any on you or on himself if that is what you were wanting. Very open to just watching you use them on yourself from time to time.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Bruce isn’t really a teasing kind of guy, he is very literal and says what he means. However teasing will work very well on him, and he will punish you. Whether that means using a toy to overstimulate you, or going so slow during sex that he is constantly edging you until you can’t take it anymore.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Whispering praises to you, or telling you how much he loves you, how lucky he is to have you, etc. Little grunts and groans only really detected audibly right next to your ear as he fucks you from behind. A little louder as he cums inside of you, going as deep as he can every single time.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Wants you to sit on his face as often as you will let him, it is by far his favorite moments with you. Just letting you kick back and watch a show or read while he makes you cum over and over again.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Longer than average, average thickness, uncut, and very aesthetically pleasing.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

About average/slightly lower than average, mostly because he tends to get distracted by science over sex. That doesn’t mean he won’t be attentive to your needs, because after all you will always cum first ;)

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Wants to cuddle before falling asleep holding you, wanting to hear your heartbeat as it is the most soothing sound to him. It will eventually lull him to sleep, as he knows you will be there in the morning.

#yandere marvel #marvel yandere #bruce banner x reader #yandere bruce banner #yandere hulk #Anonymous

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animetrashlord-007 · 4 years ago

Text

AHS ~ Unknown

Word Count;; 1.1k

Genre;; Suggestive

Pairing;; Kakuzu x Reader

Published;; 7.4.18

Notes;; Look at me pretending I know big words lol

My Masterlist

Akatsuki Halloween Special Masterlist

Everything felt new, felt exciting. Danger lurked around every corner and every shadow held an unknowable mystery as you navigated through the darkening streets, your senses on overdrive and your mind racing while you searched for the establishment your friend had recommended. She assured you that it was discreet and clean: a respectable business for respectable clientele. Her positive reviews and overall insistence had convinced you to check it out, though you doubted they’d have anything that would tickle your fancy.

When you stumbled through the front door at last (after passing it a few times due to its inconspicuous nature), you breathed a quick sigh of relief. Had you planned to engage in lascivious behaviour that very night you may have been irritated, but you brushed off the hour’s lateness and peered around the room with large, curious eyes. It was warm, well-lit and smelled like orchids. Aside from the darkness that lingered just beyond the light’s reach in each corner, the decor gave off a casual and welcoming vibe. If you hadn’t known better, you’d assume you were in the wrong place. Nothing about the small café station or fashion magazines scattered on the wooden tables across from the cool, leather sofas screamed licentious adventures.

You shrugged, lips twitching up into a small smile. ‘Part of its charm’, as your friend had said.

Shifting your gaze to the reception desk, your eyes widened. You weren’t expecting such a delicious treat to be waiting for you. The man behind the desk was quite the sight. Bright green eyes bore into your static frame, sending an electrifying tingle down your spine. Stitches littered the visible skin of his arms and face, prompting your mind to wonder what the rest of his body looked like under those clothes. Large fingers tapped the desk as he waited for you to snap out of your trance and approach him. After a few minutes passed, it became evident you would rather ogle him for awhile longer, your line of sight focused on his biceps.

“Welcome.”

An emotionless stare accompanied the man’s flat, indifferent tone as he beckoned you further inside with a brief wave of his hand. You observed the way each of his muscles worked together in perfect harmony before his hands settled on the desk. You now had an even better view of his sculpted body as the small position change revealed a delicious slice of skin beneath his unbuttoned shirt.

“Uhh… Right, yeah, thanks. Listen, -” Shaking the perverted thoughts out of your mind, you crossed the room and faced him with an unwavering gaze, hoping in vain that he wasn’t aware of how turned on he made you without even trying, “- I’m guessing you know why I’m here. Show me who is available.”

“Of course. Follow me.”

It hadn’t been your intention to even look at the brothel’s sex workers - you had come to scope the place out so you could tell your friend that you had done it and she could get off your case already - but that little pit in your stomach was growing with desire, and it needed to be filled. You needed to be filled. While you weren’t the type to cave in to your carnal desires, that damn receptionist had a voice that sent heat straight to your groin.

There were a few gorgeous women and some pretty boys lounging in the large room the receptionist had led you to. Even though there was nothing wrong with them per se, none of the people inside the room were doing anything to stroke your metaphorical fire and liberate that insatiable monster known simply as lust. They were just kind of there. They looked beautiful and seductive, sure, but none of them appealed to your tastes at all. The one that could rev your engine was standing so close yet so far, untouchable like the forbidden fruit.

With a sigh, you turned back out of the room and prepared yourself to leave until your eyes met his once again and you could feel yourself melt under his heavy gaze.

Damn him.

“I, uh, it doesn’t matter who it is, as long as they don’t mind getting a little weird, I guess.”

“Weird?”

“You know, like blindfolds and gags and shit.”

He chuckled as a light blush dusted across your cheeks, the topic edging toward the border of your comfort zone. The deep, hearty sound sent another jolt straight to your pulsing nether regions. Once you realised your eyes were looking anywhere except his unnerving stare, you gave yourself a mental kick. This wasn’t the time to get flustered.

“You think that’s weird? How cute.”

“What’s cute?” Act cool. "I mean, besides me.”

He quirked his eyebrow for a brief second but otherwise ignored your comment. “Any of them will do it for the right amount of money.”

Failed it.

“Any of them?” Act cooler. There was no rule that said you couldn’t sleep with the receptionist… Unless there was, you hadn’t looked.

Closing the gap between you and ignoring how small you felt next to his strong, broad frame, and gave him your best bedroom eyes. “They don’t interest me. I need a real man, so I guess the only question left to ask is if I can have you instead?”

Nailed it.

Your face lit up when you saw his lips quiver toward a smile. Even when his face returned to its usual stoic expression, you couldn’t stop yourself from feeling triumphant. You weren’t sure why you felt that way, but the thought of spending the night with the smoking hot receptionist felt like a prize and you’d hit the jackpot.

“Sure, for the right amount of money. I don’t come cheap, however.”

“It looks like I won’t be cumming for cheap, either,” you laughed, flashing him a wink before turning on your heels and throwing him a small wave over your shoulder. “I expect quality service when I get back.”

“Where are you going? I don’t have all night.”

Was that irritation or impatience you heard? It could’ve been both, or neither. Looking at the big picture, it didn’t matter which it was. What did matter, however, was that you weren’t going to forget that small act of disobedience anytime soon, and therefore he wasn’t going to forget it either.

“I didn’t withdraw enough cash to cover such a fine piece of ass. I’d hate for you to feel underappreciated. You just get yourself ready, handsome, and I’ll be back before you know it.”

You didn’t see his eyeroll as you strolled down the hall, confidence and excitement rolling through your body in waves.

#kakuzu x reader #kakuzu #akatsuki #akatsuki x reader #naruto #naruto shippuden #kakuzu akatsuki #animetrashlord-007

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chemicalarospec · 4 years ago

Text

Genuinely Don’t Say Anything Interesting Here But I Like Talking So Thus I’m Posting This

okay I did like nothing productive today but have a ramble on youtube fanbases, specifically the new gen of mcyt. This was two posts and then I made it one so sorry when I repeat myself. I did edit it tho lol. But that means I also inserted more, so this is just all over the place now.

me from the future: oh god. all over the place. wait wtf this is so long. I don’t even have much to say I just like writing the same sentence three different ways and refusing to cut any of them. I’m sorry; I don’t know how to edit; this is informal AF. (can I use three semicolons? at least one of those is wrong anyways lol.)

edit: I’m so sorry I forgot about having a “read more” last night laksjdflksjad. Also idk if I even agree with myself lmao.

it’s so funny how mcyt is like The Thing now. It’s not cool to like it anymore lol, cuz everybody does. (This is a me thing. I like being special lol. I also self-define “cool” so you should not take it to heart when I say it’s not cool.)

I mean, just thinking about the Dream SMP as something I *do* want to get into, it doesn’t feel like “our thing” -- it’s has the feel of a HUGE fandom. Seriously, I’m in the phandom, which ngl has been dead since 2018, and the fanbase for the SMP has a much different, bigger feel. Idk what i’m getting at, it feels imposing? looking at the Dream SMP fandom seems similar in scope and slightly in atmosphere to pre-2019 phandom, at least to me, and it’s actually making me grateful that I joined now and not all that time ago.

Also I brought up the “our thing” bit because of the mcr post that goes “funny how MCR seems like our little secret and the biggest thing in the world at the same time” and I kinda thought that was just how all fandoms worked? idk I was going to assert that the truth is different but I thought some more and now I’m not sure.

but yeah I like the “our little secret” feel and somehow the phandom has (re)gained that while technoblade (and the new gen of mcyt as a whole) is loosing it.

I mean, I’ve been watching Technoblade since the bedwars winstreak. He had less than a millions subs but most people I brought him up to actually did know who he was. He was big but he wasn’t *famous* -- we all knew about him and we all cared. Like the only person who knew who he was and didn’t care had a little brother(s?) that loved him (wait why is this all in past tense this is all still true). (Yes AFC this has become a callout post for you mocking techno lol.) (If you’re still reading my miNeCRaFT yOuTuBeR fAnBaSe MEta. cringe culture is dead tho; I don’t have to say it like that.)

Anyways, I didn’t follow Technoblade’s Dream SMP streams and now I feel like I’d just be tagging along if I did get into it. (also didn’t watch SMP Earth lol.) This is because I’m a gate-keeping jerk. Or hate missing out. One of those two things.

(awkward transition where I don’t know how to make my tangent meaningful and have to make it back to the original train of thought I violently interrupted)

As a long time Techno fan, I’m really proud of the growth he’s experiencing, but a little sad too as the community is being -- well, I don’t want to say “infiltrated,” as I don’t want to shade anyone who was simply late to the party -- perhaps diluted? overwhelmed? yeah, overwhelmed by newer fans, and becoming “unmanageable” in a sense; it feels like we’ve lost a bit of our sense of community with the influx of new fans -- no shade to any new fans! This is just the way fandoms work. When the crowd is larger, it becomes harder recognize each member as a person, even if everything else is the same. (”The death of one man is a tragedy, the death of millions is a statistic.”) (look this is how my brain works deal with it)

I just really like this small community feel, and it’s a bit daunting looking at the smp fandom.

Also the growth Dream experienced this year is genuinely ludicrous. I mean, the wide appeal of shipping is part of it, not going to beat around that bush, but there’s just so much and I wanna read an essay from a long-time fan who saw it on why he’s got so much growth.

I really hate to shame fans and stuff, but part of it, at least for me, is that most of these new fans probably aren’t “minecrafters” like we were. I doubt the majority of them grew up on Stampy, DanTDM, and whatever the other ones I didn’t watch were. I mean, some of this is because Child. For them, the distinction is really pre-quarantine post-quarantine i guess? Really, whether they played Minecraft or not. Again, I know it’s bad to shame fans, but apparently I’m just a terrible person and I feel like it’s more shallow or disingenuous to get into MCYT when it’s popular without already being into Minecraft.

WAIT that’s it -- Minecraft community, as a whole, is special. It’s a LARGE umbrella of fandoms in general, but that’s the thing: they’re all more communities than fandoms -- from the casual builders to the pro parkour players to those who watched the og youtubers to those who followed the Great Potato War, there was Minecraft Culture.

And the expanded fandom that’s sprung up around the Dream SMP and possibly Dream in general (???) is more of fandom. It feels like a fandom. People treat it like a fandom, they talk about it in fandom spaces, it is fandom, a modern fandom. Not a quaint “little” Minecraft community.

I’m not going to say it’s because of the shipping, but... I have no data but at least I can say that it certainly creates an appeal for Fandom People as opposed to Minecraft People. And then also it’s just a fandom thing so it makes the space more fandom.

Also I realized this is all based upon a feeling, so where did the feeling come from? I was reading in-fandom texts a lot today, and I think the storyline actually might have something to do with it. Also maybe the “talking behind their backs”? I can’t be bothered to remember what I’m comparing to what at this point but that’s definitely done in a lot of other spaces I’m in, so idk.

OH FRICK I’ve mostly been *in* the fandom spaces for real things lmao. (Read: I’m 100% making up everything at this point.)

(awkward transition because I inserted the last two paragraphs later on)

And really, I played minecraft today for the first time in months. But it’s still with me, you know? The memories of being introduced to it, growing up with it. Going to the Nether with my cousins, my uncle’s giant survival mode cathedral. Mojang being bought by Microsoft and everybody hating it. (... me, my brother, my two friends, essentially... how did we even know??)

[I had part about the minecraft.net writers here but it was completely unrelated so it became it’s own post. I should do that more.]

(With every sentence the target audience of this post gets smaller.)

What was I saying? I’ll just wrap up.

TL;DR: Dream SMP fandom feels like a fandom and not a Minecraft community and while that’s not necessarily a bad thing, I’ve realized I prefer a community feel, which makes me grateful I joined the phandom now. Also I shouldn’t be allowed to post things past 9:00pm.

Oh my god I’m so sorry to all my mutrals. My tired loquacious reflex has kicked in. This is essentially a dan and phil stan blog, and though I know a few of you know what I’m going on about, I’m so sorry to the rest of you.

Well, at least *I* think I’m a fascinating person with interesting things to say hahahahha.

This is like a diary post. Should I post this? Yeah, other people should share my thoughts lol. OH NO: Late-night Tumblr fandom ramble posts are the new social-justice tirade/generally useless blog-like Goodreads reviews. At least it’s what Tumblr’s made for :P.

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anonbebe97me · 5 years ago

Text

𝓗𝓪𝓹𝓹𝔂 𝓥𝓪𝓵𝓮𝓷𝓽𝓲𝓷𝓮'𝓼 𝓓𝓪𝔂! (MX Reactions || Hyung Line)

A/N: Long reactions ahead. No smut, but is suggestive! Also, this includes Wonho bc I’m #OT7 5Ever. || Maknae Line found here ||

It’s Valentine’s Day, and he’s had a long day at work- he walks into your shared apartment, throwing his duffle bag on the floor and kicking off his shoes. He looks around for you, but you’re not there. Quietly, he makes his way to the bedroom to see if you might’ve fallen asleep waiting for him, but when he opens the door, he sees you sitting on black, silk sheets, in that teeny tiny lingerie set that, when your sister had gifted it to you, you swore you’d never wear…

1.) 𝓢𝓱𝓸𝔀𝓷𝓾:

“Wait…Y/N, what is all this?” He stands at the doorway, hand still on the knob, a dumbfounded expression on his face. You suddenly feel self-conscious as you lay there awkwardly,

“It’s Valentine’s Day…did you forget?” You ask, biting your lip in fear that he had, in fact, forgotten.

He shakes his head, though the expression never leaves his face, “No, I didn’t forget…I got you this,” He takes a little brown teddy bear out from behind his back, though he’s hesitant in really showing you.

“Hyunwoo,” You smile, sliding across the cool sheets to jump off of the bed to admire his gift.

This time, it’s him biting his lip.

“What’s wrong?” You ask, raising a brow at him.

He looks down at the bear in his massive hand, embarrassed, “Nothing, it’s just…I wanted to be able to do something special for you this year, but we have rehearsals and recordings and interviews- I feel like a dick that I couldn’t really do anything…I’ll make it up to you, I promise.”

You take in his disappointed expression, understanding the guilt he’s feeling, but you can’t help but think about how absolutely sweet he’s being.

“I’ll tell you what…” You gently tug the bear out of his hand and take it over with you as you sit on the edge of the bed, “How about you come over here,” you scoot back to sit in the middle of the bed, and then spread one leg, and the other, “and make it up to me right now…”

He stares at you for a moment, admittedly a bit confused as to what you mean, but when he finally realizes-

“How about I do.”

2.) 𝓦𝓸𝓷𝓱𝓸:

“Jagiya, are you asleep-” He freezes when he sees you, your beautiful body on full display as you lay there waiting

All day, you were rehearsing various sexy lines or phrases you could say when he would open that door, but as he stands in front you, your breath seems to catch in your throat and you can’t even manage a simple hello.

Stage fright, I suppose.

You’re not usually like this- in fact, in the three years you two have been dating, he’s only ever seen you in the bras and panties that you get in a set from a department store; not that he’s complaining, of course. You’re still the hottest ass he’s ever seen, and it all ends up on the floor anyway. But tonight, you’re in that little set…

for him.

He slowly makes his way over to you, and you feel your stomach do flips. He slides onto the bed and settles in next to you, leaning back so that he’s propped up by an arm.

His gaze burns through your entire body and you have to force yourself to meet his eyes, “You’ve been working so hard lately- I wanted to do something special…” Your shy voice comes out almost like a squeak, and he can’t help the urge it ignites within him.

“Something special, huh?” His smile exposes his canines, and the added smugness he’s displaying only makes it more attractive,

“Do something special for me then, princess…”

3.) 𝓜𝓲𝓷𝓱𝔂𝓾𝓴:

“Babe, you won’t believe the shit Changkyun pulled today-” When he sees you, he feels his heart skip a beat, completely forgetting whatever meaningless and unimportant story he was about to to share with you.

“Hey…” You say softly, a gentle smile on your face as you sit cross-legged in the center of the bed.

“Hey.” He smiles back, a glint in his eye as he makes his way over to sit next to you.

Your heart is beating pretty quickly too, but you try to hide it- though when he reaches to graze his thumb over your cheek, he immediately feels the heat radiating off of you.

You blush, looking down at your hands in your lap. Usually, sex with Min is lighthearted- playful, even. But as he sits there next to you, eyes glued onto your pink-stained cheeks and timid smile, you feel something different.

Gently, he turns your face toward him, allowing only a second to go by before he’s leaning in, eyes traveling to your lips. You close your eyes, awaiting the soft pressure of his mouth against yours, and when you finally feel it, your entire body seems to melt.

Without pulling away from the intimate kiss, he’s pushing you backward into the bed, his hand traveling to the warm skin of your bare waist, but as you begin entangling your fingers in his hair, he pulls away abruptly, wordlessly staring at you for a moment.

“Is- is everything okay?” Your lips are red from the bloodflow, and you’re a little breathless.

He smiles, “Everything’s perfect.”

Your eyes search his, “Then- why are you looking at me like that?”

“Because…you’re just so damn beautiful.”

4.) 𝓚𝓲𝓱𝔂𝓾𝓷:

He’s fully expecting you to be fast asleep, as it’s almost 12:00am.

Before the photoshoot had even begun that morning, he’d stopped by the store to pick up a balloon, roses, and chocolate; he’d carried them around almost all day, occasionally checking up on the balloon to make sure it wasn’t deflating- all for you.

Quietly, he opens the door, intent on setting everything up on the chair at the corner of the bedroom, but when he sees you laying there, one leg crossed over the other, red fingernails raking gently through your hair as you move it aside to be able to see him better,

“Kihyun,” You can’t contain your smile, and evidently, nether can he.

“I was gonna surprise you- but I guess you beat me to it.”

“I guess I did,” You smirk, standing up and walking over to him.

Your eyes light up as you grab the balloon and the chocolates from him, shifting them to your other arm so you could grab the roses too, but he holds up his hand slightly, “It’s okay, you go set that stuff down and just sit down.”

You raise a brow at him, a bit confused, “It’s cool, I can take it all to the chair-”

“Y/N,” He says impatiently, though his smile is just as bright as before, “Just go sit down.”

You furrow your brows, “Okay, weirdo.” Quickly, you set the stuff down and then turn back to go sit next to him on the bed. The chill of the silk sheets forming goosebumps on your bare legs.

You look over at the plump bouquet of flowers set down against the sheets, and then look up at him, waiting for him to speak.

His smile never leaves him, though you see a change in his eyes- a sort of nervousness.

“Are you okay, Kihyun?” You ask, reaching over and gently resting your hand on his.You tilt your head slightly-

God, you look gorgeous.

And in that very moment, the nerves melt away.

“Y/N…you know how much I love you?”

You blink in confusion, though you nod your head slowly, “Yes, but-”

“No, I mean- do you know just how much I truly love you?”

Your confused expression softens into a gentle smile, “Tell me.”

“Alright, but after I tell you, you have to read the card, okay?” He says, motioning to the flowers.

You raise an eyebrow and glance at the bouquet, and sure enough, the corner of a tiny, white card peeks through from amongst the flowers.

“Alright.”

“Before you, Y/N, life was good. I mean, really good. I had my hyungs, my fans, even a couple girls-”

You reach over and smack his chest playfully, rolling your eyes. He chuckles and clutches at his chest, though he continues,

“But there was always something missing. It was like this…gaping hole in my heart that I didn’t even know I had- but then you came along. Having you by my side seemed to magnify everything; I treated everyone better, I stopped being such a fucking narcissist- even food seemed to taste better…and whenever I’d go on tour, and you couldn’t be by my side, I felt it again- that hole...”

His eyes lower for a brief moment, and you barely even notice him pull the card out of the flowers before he’s gently pushing it toward you, motioning for you to grab it.

“I used to only be able to sing about love- but now, I live it. Every single day. And not some romanticized version of it- I mean the real thing. You are the most real thing in my life, and…”

You narrow your eyes at the small card, focusing on the small, black letters:

╔═════ஓ๑♡๑ஓ═════╗

𝐼𝒻 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝓌𝒶𝓃𝓉 𝓂𝑒 𝓉𝑜 𝓈𝓉𝒶𝓎 𝒻𝑜𝓇 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓇𝑒𝓈𝓉 𝑜𝒻 𝓂𝓎 𝓁𝒾𝒻𝑒, 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝑔𝑜𝓉 𝓂𝑒.

╚═════ஓ๑♡๑ஓ═════╝

Your heart is pounding in your chest, and immediately, your vision is blurred. You think you know what’s coming, but you almost don’t even want to look up from the fear that you might be wrong.

“Y/N…” His voice is so steady, so sure…

You gather all the courage in your being to look up at him, and the tears start flowing when you see that he’s climbed off the bed and gotten on one knee.

“Will you marry me?”

________________________________________________

That wraps up part one!

Hαρρყ Vαʅҽɳƚιɳҽ'ʂ Dαყ, Bҽαυƚιϝυʅ <3

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writing-the-end · 4 years ago

Text

WS Chapter 37: Seasons Change

Previous Chapter

Masterpost

So anxiety’s been a real pain lately, but i”m not going to let it stop be from writing. I did get an ao3, though I’m just putting up LoL on there right now.

either way, another hermit meets the wanderers! Reminder that all of this was written at the beginning of s7, so this is before Keralis became stupid rich.

Red belongs to @theguardiansofredland

Ecto belongs to @cooler-cactus-block (red teach me your waysplz)

“You keep disrespecting the magic, Grian, some day it’ll come back to haunt you.” Scar hums, still put off by Grian trying to get rid of the crystal he’s been giving him. These are priceless, and yet Grian finds so much joy in tossing them around like trash.

“Sure it will, Scar.” Grian chuckles, kicking the sand of the desert beach Iskall has laid claim to. Grian holds the rowboat over his head, rolling his eyes but smiling.

“You of all people should know not to challenge magic- you’re a magical creature yourself!” Scar turns around, putting his hands on his hips and jutting out his chin.

“Just get in the boat, Scar. You’ll ‘ave lots of time to berate Grian in there.” Stress points out, tossing her vessel into the water with relaxed ease. Avon sets down the fresh jungle boat carved for her and Ecto. Mumbo plops down his boat, looking at Red.

“Getting in?” He questions. They have just the right people to fill every boat.

“Red doesn’t need the boat.” Ecto chuckles.

“What do you-” Red’s holler cuts Mumbo off as he goes running into the Hermiatic sea, leaping into the warm waters. “Right, fish person.”

Red swims through the water, her streamline from cutting through the sea. Water rolls off her scales and skin, tossles her hair, and clings to her clothes. Welcoming the kipling back home. It’s a welcome return to her natural habitat, with dolphins squeaking and whistling to greet her and a curtain of tropical fish becoming a mosaic around her. But it feels like a hollow return. This isn’t her ocean. When she gets home, will it still look like this? Is it already destroyed by that Blu?

Red rubs her eyes, exhausted from everything that’s been happening. They were attacked, and Red was helpless as her friends were gravely injured. They managed to escape to this world, only to lose each other. The fear of losing Ecto and Avon, even for just a short amount of time is terrifying. What would he do without them now? Without Ecto’s keen observation skills, or Avon’s unrelenting determination.

He grabs hold of his backpack, surfacing quietly and watching the hermits and his friends. He sees Ecto, wounded across the back. He watches Avon’s hand grip her side, covered in bandages. Losing his friends would be just as bad as the knowledge that he may lose his family. His friends are his family. Red’s fingers run along the emerald eyes of the statue Scar gave him. The smooth gold and polished emerald have become a way for Red to calm down by rubbing it. Fred may be creepy, but he’s helped him through a lot.

Red swims up beside Scar and Grian’s boat, poking her head out and kicking her legs to keep up with them. “So where are we going? Do we need food? I’m really good at fishing, I really am.”

“Keralis lives on another shore of the Hermiatic sea, and he definitely should know where Xisuma is.” Grian answers.

“I would love some fish. I didn’t bring any more potatoes.” Scar chimes in, hearing his stomach growling at the mention of food.

“How many people live on this hermiatic sea?” Red questions. She feels like she’s met so many already, are there more out there?”

Grian taps his finger, letting go of his oar. “I think we’re twenty two strong this time around?”

Red’s eyes widen at the thought. So many people, all gathered together. Red isn’t sure she’s ever seen that many people apart from villages. But these guys definitely aren’t village folk. She dives back underwater, zipping ahead and snatching fish with her teeth and claws. She drops her catch off with Scar, leaving the freshly caught cod on his purple robe. She’s like a cat, leaving fishy surprises in all of the boats. Ecto and Avon know to protect themselves from a fish, but Mumbo can only whimper and groan as a scaley salmon is tossed into his lap.

The group of travelers follow the shoreline, watching the beach change to jungle, and jungle to savanna. Acacia trees sparsely cover the rolling, dry grass. But for the wanderers, it leaves a bad taste in their mouths. It reminds them of Blu, the whole reason why they’re here, why they aren’t continuing their journey to Red’s home. Avon tries to feel better by reminding herself that they can at least gather information while they're here. Learn more about who that person was.

“So...who is this person we’re going to see? To show us the way to the world wizard?” Ecto isn’t sure she likes how many people are joining in on this journey. Her fellow wanderers were already a handful to remember and keep track of. Adding in Grian and Scar, previous people she had come to know and trust, was about the most she could handle. But now she has to worry about this Iskall guy, Stress, and the creature they call Mumbo.

“His name is Keralis. He’s a master builder. Honestly sometimes he puts me to shame when it comes to house designs.” Grian states, pulling up to row beside Ecto and Avon.

“We may have locked him up like we did you guys as well.” Scar winces, offering an apologetic smile as everyone glares at him. Still some negative sentiments there. “I mean, when you see the man, you’ll understand why we thought it. He’s like...twenty percent eyeball and thirty percent mouth.”

“There’s his base. Or… at least his starter home.” Iskall points to the hillside near the water. Blue containers stack atop one another, and construction machines sit idle in the turned up dirt. A few villagers are hard at work in the construction zone, though they all stop and stare at the incoming strangers. When Avon draws close, the villagers back away. Even in another world, they still fear her. Even in another world, she’s still a monster. She can never escape it.

“Hello my beautiful friends! Oh, and some new faces!” Keralis leans out a window, waving his hands vigorously. He leans farther so that they can see him more, and loses balance out the window.

The band of hermits and wanderers all wince, the heavy thud of Keralis hitting the ground below the open window. Stress rushes over to help, but Keralis is back on his feet before she can grab his arms. He wipes dirt from his wide eyes and gives the crew a wide smile. “Aww man, I had a record going...three days without an accident.”

“Damn, that’s a pretty good record around here.” Iskall hums.

“Who are these guys? Beyond new friends?” Keralis creeps closer to the wanderers, his curiosity met with the same from Red. The two look at one another, sizing the opposite up before breaking out into giggles. Apparently both deemed the other a worthy friend.

“I’m Red, the tall one is Ecto and the scary one is Avon. Trust me they’re a lot nicer than they look. They’re awesome friends.” Red squeezes her friend’s hand.

“Ah, well welcome, welcome. I hope my friends have been treating you well while you’ve been in our world.” Keralis shakes hands with Red and waves to those that don’t seem interested in interacting physically.

“Oh, ah yeah about that…” Scar grimaces, hoping to pave over such a sensitive topic.

Unfortunately Grian beats him to it. “Scar thought they were aliens too. Locked the wanderers up in Area 77 too.”

Keralis’s eyes and smile freeze, becoming cold as he turns his head from the wanderers to Scar. Keralis’s voice hisses through his teeth, dripping with anger. He still holds a bit of a grudge. “Did he now?”

“Whoa, hey we all cleared it up, right? We’re all friends now.” Scar backs off of Keralis, knowing the man can be particularly vicious if he wants to be. Behind those bug eyes and agape mouth is a killer. He’s a master at Head Hunt.

“Scar let me pet his cats!” Red coos, and luckily for Scar her cheery attitude towards him seems to be enough to quell Keralis’s blade.

“Alright, alright. New world, new leaf.” Keralis pulls off his helmet, tousling his hair free from the yellow safety hat. “What can I do to help you guys? Wanna buy a book?”

“Actually, we were lookin’ fer some info. Do you know where Xisuma is based?” Stress rubs her neck. She actually could use another mending book, but she isn’t carrying the diamonds on this journey.

“You want to see Bee-shwamy? What fore?” Keralis tips his head, sitting on a barrel next to his heavy work machinery. He was just with him the other day.

“He may have information that our friends here need.” Grian fills.

“He’s the smartest guy in the world when it comes to general facts of life. Man’s a wizard for a reason.” Iskall adds. “Sorry Scar...a real wizard.”

Ecto steps forward, bumping a mumbling Scar out of the way. “We were attacked in our own world by these creatures from the nether. They destroyed my home.”

“You mean pigmen?” Keralis frowns, looking over the hillside to see if Porky’s there. He didn’t think pigmen were that organized.

“He wasn’t a pigman.” The winged one, Avon, hisses. “He could talk, and he definitely wasn’t zombified or anything.”

Keralis rubs his chin. He has no clue about anything of that sort. The only person he could think that may know more is either Xisuma...or perhaps Tango. “That’s definitely some strange news. We should get to see Bee-shwamey to get this sorted out. Follow me!”

Keralis hops off his boxes, waving for the team to trail after him. Across the grasslands, another jungle rises. Trees with high canopies and vibrant leaves brush in the dry savanna wind at the interface between plains and forest. Avon is quick to grab onto both Ecto and Red. She’s not losing them again. If she had a lead, she’d put them on it.

The other hermits stick close as well. All of them have gotten lost in their own jungle, it would be so much worse in a jungle they have no knowledge of. Keralis, however, has no trouble hopping over short oak trees and swinging through the vines. His cheeky grin never falters, constantly wide eyed and taking everything in. Observing every inch of the world around him.

The jungle doesn’t stop, even when construction starts. Vines and trees creep around the white concrete, and pathways arch over the leaves below. The forest is as much a part of the construction as the scaffolding. Just as much a part of the build as the chests and lighting. Somehow, the sleek, futuristic style perfectly blends with the chaotic, ancient patterns of nature. Whoever has built this is in tune with nature.

“Oh hello there friends.” Xisuma waves, tangled up in vines that he has gotten caught in while flying. His pockets are filled with jungle saplings, clumps of dirt falling from the roots and across his mask. He spits out a pebble. “What can I do ya for?”

#hermitcraft #wandering stars #hermitblr #ecto #avon #red #mumbo jumbo #grianmc #gtwscar #keralis #stressmonster101 #iskall85 #minecraft #mineblr #mcsona #minesona #writing #writeblr

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