#and being perceived as way way shallower than they really are)

[conduitandconjurer]

How do I even articulate this?

Basically I continue to think Klaus is very fucked up but not in the same way that 90 percent of the fandom seems to think (or prefer) and it is the WEIRDEST experience. I'm just constantly like, "oh yeah, I guess that IS how most fans perceive this character."

Does ANYONE else (aside my long-trusted mutuals) get this?

[khywren]

it's time for some more astarion analysis~

making this a separate post in case people wanted to reblog just the gifs on their own and don't care about the extra fluff. i'm certain this scene has been analyzed to the hells and back by this point, but when i was making this set something really stuck out to me and i wanted to throw my two cents in anyway.

this is the tail end of the mirror scene from act 1, where you catch astarion looking in the mirror and lamenting about not being able to see his reflection or knowing what he looks like anymore. and while that alone is sad enough, it gets SO MUCH WORSE.

if you express genuine interest in his predicament (i.e. asking him if he misses his reflection and what color his eyes were before he was turned), you get to see the mask slip. it's one of the first times in the game that he's not hiding behind his quick wit and silver tongue.

if you tell him you'll be his mirror, you can see the change in his demeanor immediately. his face softens, the cadence of his voice changes; you can literally hear the vulnerability in every word he says. huge props to neil and the rest of larian for making the distinction between these dialogue options, of course. it's the little details that really make moments like these shine.

but there was something else i noticed in the footage i recorded as well that i hadn't picked up on any of my other playthroughs. i've spent a lot of time staring at this man's face, especially while capturing idle animations for gifs and wallpapers, and most of the time it's what you'd expect, with minimal face movement, expressions changing, etc. most companions i record seem to behave the same way, with similar expressions/blinking/eye movement.

but just look at astarion's face here. this feels deliberately unique. he is SO anxious, so worried how you'll perceive him. the rapid blinking, the nervous darting of his eyes… it genuinely breaks my heart.

(tumblr will only let me upload one video per post, but just look at any other idle footage of him and you'll see the difference)

and the second you tell him what he thinks he wants to hear? that he's very attractive? he slips right back into his suave, flirtatious persona, and even praises you for complimenting his looks. even if you eventually ask him if all he wants is shallow praise, he still deflects and isn't completely honest with you.

note that if you choose to take the less compassionate route and simply tell them that he has a "very good face," he will still prompt you to tell him what you see when you look at him, and the delivery of the line is subtly but noticeably different and more guarded. similarly, if you poke a little too much fun at him by calling him old and draw too much attention to his mole, he gets very flustered and ends the conversation immediately. understandable, since he's relied on his appearance for so long, and hearing (even jokingly) that even that might not be something he can use anymore must be at least a little terrifying for him.

so naturally, you might think that by being truthful with him would perhaps net you a better result -- after all, you're telling him what he asked for, what you really see, that you see him as more than just someone to lust after -- but it doesn't. he actually seems a little upset if you choose those dialogue options. in that moment, he wants to know that you find him attractive, because he thinks that's all he's good for. because if you find him attractive, there's a chance that he could seduce you and use you for protection against cazador. i do think he also genuinely wants to know that there's so much more to him than just a pretty face, since that's a big theme of his entire story/romance arc, but that's not at the top of his priority list this early in the game. he's relying purely on instinct. he knows how to respond to people telling him he's attractive. accepting genuine compliments about the person beneath the mask? that's probably not something he's had much (if any) experience with in close to two centuries. he didn't have the luxury of being able to let anyone see who he really was.

all that to say that this interaction is really heartbreaking. he wants to be seen, wants to be understood and possibly loved, but at the same time he still thinks he needs to put on a front to ensure he can keep himself safe. watching him slowly start to unlearn those habits during the course of the game has been one of my favorite things about bg3 and a huge part of what's really endeared astarion to me as a character.

[blindmagdalena]

The Dark of Sleep

18+ 3k homelander x reader. no pronouns, no y/n. established relationship, angst, referenced child abuse, referenced sleep deprivation, insomnia, lactation/nursing (no pregnancy referenced), somnophilia, sleepy comfort sex, cream pie, cock warming.

Homelander wakes from a nightmare and seeks comfort in your ever welcoming arms, not minding that you haven't quite woken yet.

Settling has never been an option for Homelander. He has always needed someone who is fierce and will love him until death, who will be on his side no matter the shadow that befalls it. Someone who will destroy and be destroyed by him. He has always needed you.

Homelander doesn't sleep well.

Vought was always testing the boundaries of how human he really was. There came a time when he was a boy they began to reduce his sleep by an hour every few nights.

Each day they would repeat the same grueling tests to see at what point the lack began to affect not only his cognitive abilities, but his powers.

Given the sheer amount of Compound V in his system, there were some who wondered if he really needed to sleep at all.

It would have been miraculous if he didn’t. It would be one more aspect of his perfect design that they could pat themselves on the back for. 

Unfortunately for both him and them, it was not so.

When they realized the deprivation did affect him, they wanted to understand how badly. They continued the deprivation until they had reduced his sleep to nothing at all, keeping him awake by any means necessary. He begged for sleep. 

It’s a marathon, John, Vogelbaum told him. Eleven days. That’s the record for a human. You can beat that, can’t’cha, tiger?

Tiger. It always made him feel stronger when Jonah called him that.

Ultimately it was less about his perseverance and more about his endurance. He didn’t have much choice in the matter of whether or not he would fall asleep.

Every time he started to doze off, an alarm would blare in his room, startling him back awake. I’m sorry, he would sob, riddled with guilt for the perceived failure.

There was never any answer.

His memories of that particular stretch of time are few and far between. He knows that on the fifth day, he started hallucinating. Only then did they finally allow him to sleep, realizing that–in his delirium–he could potentially destroy the facility if they didn’t.

Ever since those experiments, he’s had difficulty falling asleep. Guilt worms its way into his stomach each night, a cold dread that builds the closer he gets to a doze.

He never entirely got over the feeling of disappointment that came with the revelation he was indeed afflicted with this little aspect of humanity.

The scientists had seemed so excited by the prospect that he wouldn’t be.

He often wishes he wasn’t. The guilt is nothing compared to the nightmares that precede it.

Things began to change when you entered the picture.

Unlike him, you love to sleep.

He’d begun to think you might suffer from low grade narcolepsy with how easily you fall into it. Any time you’re being driven in a warm car, snuggled against his side watching television, or you’ve simply been stationary too long, you start to doze off with an ease that he’s never known.

It’s just really easy to sleep when I feel safe, you told him when he called you on it. I feel safe with you.

He had no choice but to kiss you senseless for that.

The time he spends with you changes his perception of sleep. Instead of viewing it as little more than a necessary evil to maintain the condition of his body and mind, he thinks of feeling your body against his.

He thinks of your breaths, deep at first and then growing shallow as you begin to dream.

He thinks of the way he holds you and–even more wonderful–the way you hold him, inviting him into your arms again and again for the explicit purpose of sleep.

No lingering threat of alarms or disappointed looks through a pane of glass. Just you. Just this.

I feel safe with you.

The nightmares lessened. Nowadays he generally sleeps however long you do, but old habits die hard. 

Homelander startles awake, heart racing, the after-images of his nightmare still flashing behind his eyelids every time he blinks.

It takes a moment to register his reality: cuddled up snug against your back, wide awake too early in the morning, the sun only just starting to rise. He exhales roughly, nuzzling at the back of your neck, then your bare shoulder.

The weight of you in his arms is a constant warm comfort, the smell of you intoxicating. He's not even sure he could sleep at all without you anymore. 

Even the way you snore endears him.

He holds you close while the nightmare fades into the back of his mind, his pulse gradually slowing, soothed by the steady beat of yours.

Given the chance, he can't help but explore you. He runs his hand along your naked side, trailing the slopes of your body from your ribs to your outer thigh, then back up. He knows the shape of you as well as he knows the New York skyline.

At times he feels like every curve of you was made just for him. Under the sensitive pads of his fingers he can feel little goosebumps prickling along your skin where he touches you, featherlight and ticklish.

You make a soft sound in your sleep, giving him pause. The corner of his mouth quirks slightly.

Mmm...

He kisses the junction between your neck and your shoulder, ghosting his hand back down your body. On the slide back up, he cups your breast. Supple and full, with every drop of it dedicated to him.

That you do this for him is still a wonder. That you would allow him this forbidden thing without judgment or agenda. It leaves him awestruck: one more trauma that you’ve spun into golden comfort.

He thumbs gently at your nipple, coaxing it until wetness seeps onto his thumb. His cock gives an answering throb at the feel of it, of your body responding to him involuntarily in your sleep. 

"Babe," he whispers against your skin. No response. He licks his lips, his own heart rate picking up with excitement. He kneads your breast slowly, his mouth bone dry, achingly thirsty for the answering rivulets of milk that drip onto his hand.

Still you don’t wake. He gingerly lifts away from you, helping you to roll back into the dip in the bed his hand pressed into it creates, your torso turned towards him.

You’re deep asleep, your head lolled to one side. 

Leaning in, he meets your pearl-soft skin with a kiss just at the swell of your breast, peppering more further down. Your scent fills his nose, sharpest in the line between your breasts. He runs his mouth slowly over them, between them. You smell of maple and summer rain. Heady, sweet, wistful.

“Babe,” he says once more, voice too soft to actually rouse you.

Just enough that he’d be able to say he tried to wake you. That you’re not even conscious adds to the taboo nature of what he’s about to do, thrilling something deep inside him.

Despite your encouragement, getting what he’s always wanted has never stopped feeling like thievery. Like something he was never meant to have.

His stomach flips while his cock throbs as he takes your nipple into his mouth, eyes fluttering shut. He rumbles a quiet moan for the taste of you filling his mouth, tongue pressing against the firm bud.

You taste sweeter than you smell, your skin even softer against his tongue. He sucks slowly and gently, flooding his mouth nearly to the point of spill before he swallows, greedy for the taste of you.

You sigh a sweet little noise and his heart jumps again, lids flickering open to glance up at you.

Still asleep.

He rolls your nipple with his tongue, presses it into his top teeth just enough that more nectarine warmth spills into his mouth and you shiver against him.

Fuck, he thinks, nearly moans the thought aloud into your skin. Arousal mingles with the cream-sweet smell of you and it sends a pang of heat through him so intense that his body curls against yours, his hardening cock pressing into the curve of your ass. 

He moves his hand a touch more firmly down your body, over your stomach, further until his fingertips brush your clit. He begins rubbing slow, gentle circles while he continues to suck.

You moan so very sweetly, a breathy sound pulled from deep in your chest even as you sleep.

Resisting the urge to bite, he holds you to him, grinding against your ass.

He's achingly hard now and more than a little desperate for your active participation. He lifts from your breast with a wet pop, panting softly.

"Babe," he murmurs, louder now, more urgent. "Honey... Wake up," he says, breath tickling the shell of your ear. He rubs more firmly between your thighs, coaxing you in more ways than one.

With a sharp inhale you finally wake, disoriented with sleep.

"Mmm, wha—Nnnngh..." you moan, reflexively grabbing him by the wrist.

He always runs warmer than you, but even so he can feel how hot your skin is against his. You come out of sleep with feverish need already in full gear, your cunt velvet soft against his fingers.

He exhales a heated sigh along your neck. He uses the arm crooked under you to catch hold of your jaw and turn your head to face him, kissing you fervently.

"Need you," he murmurs between kisses. "Couldn't help myself," he says by way of half-hearted apology, the words tumbling out in an urgent stream of desire. “M’so hungry.”

He craves more than milk, more than a fuck, more than pleasure and flesh. He knows there is an emptiness inside him–knows even the people who put it there–and that so few things in this world have ever scratched the surface of what it would mean to fill that pit.

Your love has come the closest.

Settling has never been an option for him. He has always needed someone who is fierce and will love him until death, who will be on his side no matter the shadow that befalls it. Someone who will destroy and be destroyed by him. He has always needed you.

Still half asleep, you reach between your legs, beyond his hand, and grasp blindly at his cock, surprising a breathless little moan out of him. Parting your thighs, you guide his cock between them and then tighten them back together.

"Don't stop," you tell him, voice frayed with sleep and arousal in equal parts.

He eagerly puts his hand back to work massaging circles over your clit, stopping only briefly to bring his fingers up to his lips, sucking them into his mouth, savoring the heady flavor of you while thoroughly wetting them before he puts them right back where they belong.

He thrusts against you, fucking the plush, warm space between your thighs, your cunt wet and perfectly soft along the top of his cock.

Hooking your arm over the back of his neck, you slide your fingers into his hair and grip it gently, bringing his mouth to yours. He licks your own taste into your mouth, groaning his pleasure, his fervence. You clench your thighs until he breaks from your lips with a gasp.

“Inside,” you urge him, licking your lips. He stares at the shine of them, transfixed by how kiss-swollen and delicious they look. “I want you inside me.”

He nods deliriously, pausing his stroking of you in order to align himself, letting out a shaky breath for the wet heat of your cunt against the head of his cock.

The novelty of this never dies; how fucking good it feels when your pussy opens to him, the silky pull of your quivering walls stealing the breath from his lungs.

The hungry flutter of noise that scrapes up your throat as he bottoms out nearly makes him come then and there.

He screws his eyes shut, filling both palms with the weight of your breasts, kneading with tight restraint, spurred by the quickening breaths that bloom from your parted lips.

Your eyes meet his, bleary and wild.

“I love you,” you say breathlessly. “Mm, you feel so good. Harder, wanna feel your strength,” you moan, breath hitching when he obeys you, when he lets go just a fraction more of his power and his skin slaps against yours with force enough to make you gasp.

Your words wrap tight around his heart like a fist. He swallows the lump in his throat and kisses you once, twice, thrice, each one more desperate than the last.

He holds your stare, lips parted, brows furrowed. He’s never fucked someone who holds his gaze the way you do. It’s as if you don’t want to miss a single moment of the pleasure you give him.

It drives him insane.

He wants nothing more than for you to never take your eyes off of him, to shower him always in your love. Your attention would be wasted anywhere else.

You were made for him.

“I love you, too,” he says, voice strained, hips rolling in sharp, deep thrusts that really make you start to sing for him. "Ffffuck, fuck," he moans, thrusts turning jagged the closer he climbs to his release. He slides one hand down your side, hikes your leg up so that he can fuck you deeper. 

He's determined to bring you to the edge with him, adjusting until he finds the angle that makes you cry out and yank his hair.

"Homelander," you gasp, your skin pricking with goosebumps, pussy locking up around him the closer you get.

You're fully awake now, shaken from the haze of sleep, but helpless to do anything but hold on against the onslaught of his thrusts. You squeeze his hair with one hand and grab his wrist with the other.

"Oh, god. That feels so f-fucking good, gonna make me, make me—"

He doesn't get to hear the rest of it, but he feels it.

He feels your whole body tense in exquisite agony; your hold on his hair tightening, your nails biting ineffective crescents into the invulnerable skin of his wrist, but it’s the soaked convulsing of your cunt quivering tight all around him that hurls him over the precipice of his own release.

His brows knit tightly together, eyes screwing shut right before that last tether of control snaps and he drives his hips up. He comes hard on that deep thrust, spilling load after load into you, your pussy greedily milking his cock with the aftershocks of your own climax.

He forgets to breathe for a solid minute, the orgasm shaking him to his core. He sucks in a shaky breath when the tremors settle, exhaling roughly as he gently rocks his hips into the wet mess he's made of your cunt, burying his face into your chest, nuzzling at the same breast he’d had his lips on.

The two of you spend a few moments just breathing, gradually floating down from the high of it, peaceful silence falling over you both. He nuzzles you, smiling dreamily in the aftermath of his pleasure. He kisses your breast as you stroke your fingers through his hair. 

When you cup the back of his head, subtly pulling him to your chest, he takes the hint and sucks your nipple back into his mouth, exhaling a deep breath from his nose.

He falls into a near trance like this, his eyes heavily lidded and glazed over. Your fingers card through his hair, your body a warm sanctuary that he keeps himself buried deep within, your limbs slotted perfectly against one another.

Each stroke along his scalp sends pleasant tingles down his spine. You bring him a peace that he once could have only imagined for himself.

He feels your love in every tender touch, hears it in the steady thrum of your heart. He's thoroughly addicted to you, intoxicated by the effortlessness with which you soothe him, with which you love him.

“God, that was amazing,” you murmur. The praise is so tender, so earnest that it helps him come down slowly from his high, turning his freefall into a gradual descent. “You're amazing."

Once satiated–at least for now–Homelander pulls from your breast with a soft pop, placing a kiss upon it before adjusting properly behind you, allowing you back onto your side. He nuzzles at your neck, kissing the shell of your ear. He moves to pull out, but you stop him.

“Stay,” you tell him, voice wrung out and as sweet as a vanilla milkshake. You stroke his thigh, nails scraping exquisitely along his skin. He loves the way you feel against him after he fucks you; warm and thoroughly claimed. “Feels good.”

Smiling���amazed by all that you are–he eases himself flush to you once more, wrapping both arms around your middle and squeezing as tight as he dares, wringing a cute little hum from you.

You interlace your fingers with his, squeezing his hand in turn.

“You’re perfect,” he murmurs at your ear, brushing his lips over the shell of it. He’s been in relationships before–he’s loved before–but it’s never felt like this. It never felt like something eagerly shared with him until it was coming from you.

Now that he has it, he’d sooner burn the whole world down than ever be without it again.

You give a ticklish little shiver against him. “Go’sleep,” you tell him, snuggling into your pillow. “‘Fore I get grumpy.”

He laughs, settling his head down on the pillow behind yours. “Is that a threat?”

“Mmhm,” you say, and before he can respond, you–in all your delicious cruelty–clench down on his spent cock hard enough to make him groan.

He buries his face into the back of your neck, exhaling a rough little breath. It won’t be long before the wet heat of you riles him right back up and he’s ready to go again.

“Gonna make me hard again,” he warns, licking his lips. He’d much rather go for round two than go back to sleep.

“Gimme another hour,” you say, the words beginning to slur as you fade back into it yourself, a smile audible in your voice. “Then you can make that my problem.” He grins, those words like music to his ears.

Just as he said–you’re fucking perfect.

[punksocks]

Astrology Observations No.27:

*just based on my observations, pleas only take what resonates

(Trying to write more posts and answer more asks lately, everything has been so busy omg- hope you all enjoy what I can put out there tho! c:)

-A perspective but I think Libra placements (big 6 but especially Venus and mars) are attracted to harmonious/balanced appearances, like I think having that glow from confidence in your aesthetic and it fitting you and things like that can make you just as attractive to Libra placements as conventional measurements of beauty

-Sun Conjunct Venus makes you really charismatic and you probably attract a lot of people by being yourself, and sometimes these natives can be people pleasers especially if they’re trying to impress others

-Quietly I associate your mars sign and your MC the most with the work you’ll do. Mars because you can’t divorce your passion from your work (says the Capricorn). And MC because it’s what you’re known for and that’s often tied to some sort of work/action. North node is tied in there too but it plays out so long term it can be harder to summarize. (I can do a post about the general fields that placements tend to go towards if folks are interested?)

-Aries and Sagittarius Mercury tied for most likely to accidentally blurt out your secrets

-Chiron Venus aspects (especially square, opposition, and conjunction) may find themselves undoing a lot of pressure around their looks or being especially hard on themselves over their perceived flaws/imperfections

-The sign over your 5th house may denote if you have many or few casual romantic connections (Saturn/Capricorn pointing to fewer one end of the scale and Jupiter/Sagittarius pointing to many at the other end of the scale, depends on Venus and mars too)

-You may find yourself accidentally pouring your heart out to water moons (especially cancer over how emotionally in-tune they are and scorpio over traaaaumaaa oml)

-I feel like Sagittarius can feel less mutable because Jupiter makes some of the forms of expression so big (ex. A Sagittarius Mars can get so mad at you and blow up, Sagittarius Mars/Venus typically date many partners, Sagittarius moons can express their emotions in a big way- I probably feel this way bc I’m Sag Pluto, the extremes lol)

-I’ve noticed that Venus dominants can seek more attention compared to like Leo/sun doms

-Fixed Venus can become codependent on their partner, putting heavy exceptions on their person for them to be their everything if underdeveloped— but if developed they can be very loyal to their person

-Mutable Venus aren’t quite commitment-phobic but they tend to be looking for a really special combination of traits to actually settle down with (when they’re monogamous), otherwise they get distracted very easily (or they treat their romantic options, and sometimes friends, like very temporary things- for better or for worse)

-Cardinal Venus are most likely to really go after what they want romantically, I think out of all the Venus modalities they have the most accurate idea of what they want at heart, from the start. But on the shadow side of this, they may be manipulative or try to conform their partner into what they want. (may play out differently for moon opposition/square Venus)

-I feel like where ever Venus is heavy in your chart may be how people assume you’re gracious but in a somewhat shallow way (ex. Venus conjunct mercury, people may find your voice and expression charming but assume you’re not that smart)

-Venus/Saturn aspects/ Capricorn Venus tend to have a lot of unrequited love interests and crushes that don’t reciprocate their affections when they’re younger but as they get older they tend to get the most affection from suitors that are older than them (be careful out here! Sometimes these old folks don’t know anything and they have bad intentions- girl when I say I had to take my own advice)

-Leos (big 3, especially sun & Asc) often know the right thing to say to charm you, it’s like when they want to they hit that sweetspot dead on. So do Libra’s (big 3) but they tend to approach things less directly, like compliments that really sit with you and come onto you in quieter, sometimes less serious way (if they have both in their big 3 then they’re just -a charmer- and idk I take that at face value 80% of the time lol but I’m a skeptic)

-I find that Pisces and Sagittarius placements (big 6 but especially sun for identity and moon for emotionality) often get VERY into spirituality at some point in their lives

-People with Jupiter in Virgo tend to work very diligently, almost too hard sometimes and they can be prone to burning themselves out from this behavior (something something don’t burn the candle at both ends- hypocritical from a Jupiter in Capricorn person lol but still)

-We talk about how Scorpio placements observe every detail about you, but I like Pisces placements (big 6 but especially sun, moon, Venus, and mars) have told me things about myself and habits I have that I’ve never noticed about myself. They’re super observant they notice a lot. I think they have this in common with their sister sign, Virgo. But I noticed Pisces will use their intuition in their observations instead of just analyzing. (I.e. you do x when you’re angry, is it because you feel defensive? Or I noticed you light up when you talked about him, you must really like him)- can also apply to Neptune Conjunct your big 3 (especially moon), and big 3 in 12th but it’s a bit more second nature to them than Pisces

-The season of your Venus sign is the time you’re most likely to indulge in self care and purchases for yourself (Sag season started and all of a sudden I was like I need makeup now, even though I hardly wear it in the winter lol)

-The season of your mars is the time you’re most like to take major actions (starting a business, going on solo adventures, etc)

-The season of your sun is when you’re most likely going to receive the most public recognition (also when the sun is transiting your MC/10th house)

[lizardkingeliot]

So it's already been discussed to death by myself and many others that the whole rockstar persona Lestat is going to adopt in season 3 will mostly be to take the heat off Louis. I mean... there are other reasons too. Lestat loves attention and playing music. But as with everything else Lestat in this show, Louis will be his number one motivation.

Anyway. I've been thinking a lot about that and how it has the potential to mirror some of Lestat's past behavior on the show. Namely what he does in 1x03 when he calls out Jelly Roll Morton's playing. On the surface, it looks like he's doing it just to be a brat because he's angry with Louis. But as Louis' narration continues he reveals Lestat actually did it to save Louis the embarrassment of Jelly Roll leaving him high and dry.

What's really interesting about that moment is that Lestat does this in the immediate aftermath of being rejected by Louis. Louis says he doesn't want to kill anymore which means he doesn't want to hunt with Lestat anymore which means he's rejecting his vampirism which means he's rejecting Lestat and the life they promised to build together in the church, on the altar...

And Lestat's immediate reaction is to do something that not only gets him attention and allows him to act out a bit but also allows him to Do Something For Louis. Even though he's just been rejected. Even though he's hurt. Probably even because he's so hurt and because he's been rejected. Louis hurting Lestat, in so many ways, only seems to amplify Lestat's feelings for him?? Makes him love Louis even more? Makes him want to do things for Louis even more than he already did???

This quote from 1x03 is his thesis statement tbh:

Which leads me back to Rockstar Lestat. Sponging up the adoration and getting to be Lelio again but really doing it all for Louis. Even though he's not with Louis and they're Totally Just Friends Right Now Guys. Even though Louis has maybe rejected him??? Or at least he perceives it that way? We'll have to wait and see how they play their dynamic when the season starts to be sure. But even if an outright rejection isn't the case...

The book is going to be a factor. Not just what Louis said about Lestat that's on those pages, but what the Talamasca made Daniel edit out. I think it's a definite possibility Lestat is going to come off much less nuanced than he appeared even in season one tbh. And even if he knows about the edits (or if the edits end up not mattering at all) the very idea of Louis sitting down to do an interview that led to their story being exploited in such a way is going to hurt.

And then for his reaction to be putting on this dramatic rock star spectacle that on the surface looks like a shallow bid for attention when in reality it's going to be... Lestat protecting Louis from the vampires who want to skin him alive. Doing everything for Louis. Even when he's hurt. And maybe even because of that...

[pomefioredove]

yeah the other characters think he's a loser, but I never really see anyone talking about how idia is perceived as like. mean? and rude? and selfish? and egotistical? by his classmates?

leona, vil, riddle, ace, and (I'm sure) others have all made comments on this multiple times. idia's social anxiety is, to the others, selfish. his avoidance is selfish. his awkwardness is selfish. people perceive idia as being pretentious and rude for "refusing" to speak to his classmates or go to events/classes/meetings in person. just as much, if not more, than they perceive him as a loser. it's such an interesting dichotomy. idia is constantly blamed for his own struggles in a specific way other twst characters really aren't. "if he was more social, he would have friends. if he tried harder, he would be liked. if he showed interest in other people, they would accept him" which is obviously not true and hurtful to idia. even when it's supposed to be helpful, it's ignoring his wants and struggles and personality

I just think it's a really good representation of introversion and extreme social anxiety because that's literally what it's like- there's a point where being "shy" isn't cute or charming or comical, it's just annoying, and people get frustrated with you. they treat you like you're doing this to yourself, like you're choosing to be socially inept. and yeah awkwardness does make you come off as cold and weird, even and especially when you're not trying to be. but. I don't know... this is a super shallow analysis, this is just a really specific thing about idia I latch onto

despite pretty much every piece of media ever having introvert characters, this is something I've only ever seen represented in one other thing. even though I think it's pretty relatable?

[mihii-i]

hey hey, I saw your post about Mizu and I'm going to make a request of a oneshot, feel free to not do it if you want (my english is terrible i hope you understand)

It would be a modern AU where Mizu is in a "relationship" with the reader, but they both want to take the relationship further, become girlfriends or something like that, it could have an NSFW beginning if it fits with what you're writing.

I would also really like to see your hcs for a modern Mizu, but maybe that can be in another post 💕

juxtaposed.

Pairings: mizu x fem!reader

CW: nsfw, mostly sfw tho, female reader, afab reader, fingering kinda idk bro, situationship sorta??? fluff, slight angst, modern au, GIRLS KISSING OH NO, sitationship, wuh luh wuh, i have no warnings for this so im just gonna lose my shit over this gorgeous woman, this is worse than my furina obsession fyi yes your welcome for letting you guys experience this, might change my blog name to mizu’s wife instead lol, support my endeavors, the way I licked my phone when I saw her, not proofread.

A/N: OPEN THE FLOODGATESSSSSSSSSS AAAAAAAAAAA I’m so sorry whenever I rewatch bes I have the worst fucking mizu obsession and I plan on letting the whole world know about this one cause GOOD LORD HOW DID I NOT THIRST OVER HER EVERY SECOND THE FIRST TIME I WATCHED. Anyway I love her sm u guys don’t understand like I started eating my pillow 🕯️

Shallow gasps flowed out of your lips in a sudden jerk as the ridge of Mizu’s fingers nudged against your insides gently, her knuckles that were pressed against your cunt decorated with glossy heaps of your juices. Chest heaving, you could only take in your mind swirling with the rush of ecstasy that clouded every fucked our crevice of your mind, heaps of the bedsheets bundled in your fists as your eyes traced over the woman breathing heavily above you with her head lowered.

For quite some time, the two of you found yourselves drawn to each other, your own thoughts constantly racing with every aching second you spent near Mizu without holding her in some way. You couldn’t help the maelstrom of your vivid imagination racing through your mind each time you lost yourself in those icy blue eyes, utterly transfixed on the thought of her hands roaming your figure—the set goal being not to leave a single spot on you untouched.

Of course, you had always found yourself strangely attracted to her in a way apart from your carnal desires screaming within you. There you lay on the couch whenever she wasn’t in the dorm, every fiber in your body craving her arms hemmed around your waist behind you, nose buried in the crook of your neck as she would only respond to any remark of yours with a low hum. To put it simply, any action of hers, whether it was ravaging you like an untamed beast or ghosting her nails along your back to hold you close—all of them made your knees weak, chest fluttering at mental image alone.

Despite the euphoric waves that washed over you in the midst of your sexual passion, it was clear that nothing could amount to how your heart thudded in your chest at the thought of pouring out your heart and soul to her, spilling out every last drop of affection you had for this woman. Silence would frequent your reactions outside of the dorm however, typically not speaking to one another in public.

Although you wouldn’t admit such vulnerable expressions, you couldn’t help but feel a sting of sorrow whenever Mizu’s shoulder grazed past yours, acting as if you were nothing but a shadow of a human being. Sure, she opened up quite a bit around you in private, even then you acknowledged that she wasn’t a huge fan of public affection nor interaction in general. Yet you couldn’t help the burning sensation coiling within you, paired with the longing desire to scream out everything you felt until your voice went hoarse.

You knew the truth perceived in your head however. You knew with a shining clarity, clearer than the fresh water descended from the sky, of a truth that drilled a hole in your chest at the mere prospect. Her unrequited feelings should be of no importance to you, yet you could never comprehend the brimming tears that rolled down your cheeks whenever you were alone with this realization. At this point, you would sell your entire soul just to love her past this caged sexual situationship, silently longing for her love like a damned beggar.

It was of no use, was it?

Cautiously, you elevated your body off of the bed upon being able to catch your breath, gaze still fixated on her lowered head. You swallowed thickly at the sight of Mizu’s face locked onto dampened sheets below her, eyes empty as her breath didn’t seem to even out after a while. Her demeanor nearly made her seem unapproachable, of course anyone who was this stoic and menacing appearance wise would repel anyone close by, so saying it was surprising wouldn’t be a the best choice of words.

“Mizu…?”

She didn’t respond.

Your blood ran cold with each lingering breath that hung in the air as Mizu’s gaze hadn’t once rose to meet yours, her ragged pants becoming more and more prevalent in the ghastly silence enveloped the two of you. You felt your stomach uncomfortably churn as you gazed upon her, skin flushed and hair spilling along her shoulders. Finally, she raised her eyes to meet your gaze.

Her irises bore into you with a piercing glint of an unreadable sense, goosebumps blooming your skin as an uneasy chill trickled down your spine. Mizu’s quiet demeanor only served to accentuate the discomfited flurry racing in your head, your mind scrambling together every possible thing you could’ve done wrong. You looked her up and down nervously, glancing down at the blanket fitted snug over her chest until she finally opened her mouth to break the silence.

“(Name).”

She dragged her bottom lip between her teeth in a pause, her voice slightly shaky. Mizu’s fingers curled around the blanket heaped over her chest, grasping onto it to compose her thoughts. This might be the first time you’ve ever seen her this apprehensive, especially after sex.

“I can’t do this anymore…I don’t want to do this anymore.” She breathed out, swallowing back her usual stoic demeanor to leave herself open to you as she shifted closer, shoulder pressing to yours. Initially, her words formed a lump in your throat with the wrong idea. Did she want to stop? Were you pissing her off? What the hell did you do different this time that she hated? Damn it- what made her snap?

You swallowed back the sob crawling up your throat, threatening to spill out. The intense pulsating sensation in your chest from perturbation juxtaposed the initial throb that resided in your chest from pleasure. Yet you kept your impulsive reaction to yourself, taking in a breath to hear her out as you were sure she wasn’t entirely done with her sentence. To which, you would in fact be right.

“What do you mean by that..?”

“I can’t keep up this whole sex without feelings shit. I can’t keep pretending towards you like this.” She sighed, eyes heavy and clouded with something you could only observe as guilt.

“You have no idea how much I care for you, no idea how much I’d give for you. I think I like you more than just wanting to have sex with you.”

Mizu stated her feelings bluntly, muscles visibly tensing upon articulating her thoughts out loud. She awaited your response, a sour expression on her face to prepare for an inevitable rejection or negative response. Much to her surprise, you felt a strange warmth bubble up within you at her tender words, each string of things she said sparking a feeling rich like velvet.

Your fingertips danced along the defined skin of her cheek, pinky finger slipping below her jawline to caress every bit of her face with nothing but pure adoration. Mizu’s breath hitched at your feather light touch, involuntarily leaning into it-—craving more. Oddly enough, her initial anxiety built up was washed over with an unfamiliar fluffy feeling, a sort of flame ignited within her as your fingers traced the ridges along her face.

Smiling, your eyes roamed over her lithe yet muscular figure, taking in her entrancing beauty as if you were eating her up with your eyes alone. God, she was perfect. You found yourself questioning whether you were enveloped in the grace of a dream right now, blinking twice to affirm that this woman did in fact love you back. You reached over slowly, inching your hand closer and closer to her resting hand before running your palm over the top of her hand and tracing along her knuckles.

Fingers laced in hers, you took in a breath, lips ghosting over her cheek at a dangerously close level. Mizu’s face grew hot from your proximity, strands of hair shrouding the sides of her face to shield her embarrassing expression atleast a little, anticipation piling in her stomach. She leaned on the weight of her arms a little, anything to gain some semblance of stability as her usually stoic self completely crumbled near you in this moment. You hummed softly, drawing your lips back to speak.

“Well…do you wanna try it then?”

She glanced over at you with a puzzled expression, cocking her head.

“Try what?”

“Dating, obviously. I think we could work out honestly, and I’ve been dying to be your girlfriend for a while- you don’t even know.” You admitted, stumbling over your words a little at that last part.

Your heart nearly melted at the sight of the rare, small smile on Mizu’s face that met your statement. It was clear by the look in her eyes that she was genuinely happy. A rare occurrence. Unable to help the affectionate chuckle that left you at her expression, you gently cupped her face on both sides, palms flat against her cheekbones as you pulled her in for a brief kiss against her smooth lips.

Mizu closed her eyes, exhaling at the endearing gesture that ended as quickly as it began. She let out a quiet laugh in response, arm snaking around the curve of your waist as she reclined back into the comfort of the bed, sinking into the plush mattress in bliss. You rested your hand atop the edge of the glass window near the bed, lifting it up to allow a relaxing jet of wind to glide along your face. Falling back into the covers beside her, you draped your arm gently over the edge of her shoulder.

She aimlessly stretched her palm flat against the bedside table, shuffling for her tinted orange glasses situated next to the digital alarm clock. Grasping her hand, you coaxed her to stop her from grabbing her glasses, using your freehand to turn her head towards you.

“Don’t. I want to look into your eyes a bit longer.”

Mizu blinked, before her gaze was consumed by a sort of dreamy appearance that allowed you to get lost in those sky blue eyes, as if you were staring out into the vast ocean itself.

Nothing mattered in this moment. Mizu’s love was more than enough for you to fall back into a trace in her arms.

A/N: um hello I love how this turned out ANYWAY I LIED IM NOT GONNA LEAVE UNTIL 2025 THAT WAS ME BEING DRAMATIC IM BACK BEFORE CHRISTMAS EVEN probably cause im far too obsessed with mizu

Anyway I can’t give a full list of hcs here but here’s one headcanon for modern mizu—I feel like she would get really easily annoyed in public spaces around obnoxious people, like she’d hold herself back from slapping someone in a bar full of drunk boys.

I got so frustrated over my homework I started cussing at it in telugu help

also I might change my blog name from k0yaz to mihi or smn close to that (probably cause it’s literally my nickname and I’m at risk of someone homophobic finding my account if they see k0yaz) SOOOOO if you see a username change ITS STILL ME PLEASE anyway bye love yall im totally normal over this woman is it obvious ngl this fic looks short I hope it’s not pls don’t be short I spent so much time on this.

[princessjojo-x]

10th House Synastry

these are public rxships that are very seen by the outside world. this couple may put on a performance for others, which can eventuate in a negative way; for instance scandals & situations that effect reputations & careers.

both partners may care more abt how others perceive the rxship rather than the actual condition of the rxship, which leads to them putting up a facade & fabricating the rxship.

you may share this synastry with whoever you start a family with bc they’re literally changing your status & legacy by marrying & breeding you.

your partner holds the ability to influence others to feel & act a certain way towards you. your partner will shift the foundations of how you’re perceived (inc self-perception) & ultimately change your social status (for better or worse). in my experience, those i share this synastry with tend to talk, gossip or brag abt me immensely!

your partner may admire your reputation, but that could be their only point of attraction, leading to a shallow & fleeting connection. your partner may even put you on a pedestal (the same way we idolise celebrities) which could indicate a rxship bordering obsession.

partners may connect or succeed together in terms of: goals, business, fame, career & so on - partners tend to push each other to grow in these areas.

if not accompanied with warmer aspects elsewhere, this synastry can create a very cold chemistry (esp if mars is entangled here). both partners are equally detached & have no clue what they want from one another, with a tendency to be too logical & nitpicky with each other. this is the type of couple that are known to be arguing all the time; typically it’s power imbalances & big egos that cause these arguments.

Venus:

house is the dominant partner for some reason (possibly due to experience or age). consequently, venus perceives house as mature. venus feels like this rxship can change their life in some way (career, status, etc).

Mars:

mars has a somber approach to house. mars can seem unbothered to an untrained eye, but the calmness emitting from mars isn’t discontent or disinterest, it’s merely admiration for house. mars wants to impress house but wants to bring house down too. house is everything mars wants to be & how they want others to perceive them. it can be really tiring for house to hear mars trying to make them insecure. consequently, house often finds themselves leaving their walls up around mars more than they would anyone else. on the bright side, sex is very passionate & long-lasting.

Moon:

moon feels uneasy abt house due to the lack of emotional closeness between partners. moon eventually grows tired bc they’re never emotionally noticed & their needs are not being met enough.

Lilith:

lilith feels the need to prove themselves to house.

Mercury:

this is an awful placement for mercury. mercury is going to speak to house like corporate professionals.

[davidtennantgenderenvy]

Addressing The Tinhatters: A Statement in Solidarity With @dtmsrpfcringe And Others

I've been active in this fandom for a little over a year, and in my time here I've kept my slate pretty clean. I try not to involve myself in drama and discourse, and when I see something I don't agree with online, most of the time I keep it to myself. I've been aware of the blogs I refer to in this post basically from the onset, but I've stayed quiet, partially to not come across as disrespecting others' opinions and preferences and partially to protect my peace and my own life as a creator. But what started as mostly harmless, if a bit unhinged and delusional, behavior, has turned on some fronts into unimaginable cruelty the likes of which I never imagined this fandom to be capable of. As someone who it seems people in this fandom have come to respect, I think it would be unfair and selfish for me to stay neutral any longer.

Fanfiction has been a genuinely transformative force in my life. It has helped me discover so much about my own relationships to love and desire, and I would never want to tell anyone that it is wrong for any ship to be that source of inspiration for them, including RPF. Nor do I think, as I've said, that it's inherently wrong to have speculative thoughts about David and Michael's sexualities. As someone who has been lucky enough to interact with David several times now, and probably will again, I choose not to do so myself in a public forum out of respect, but curiosity doesn't have to be invasive, and David and Michael being in loving partnerships with women certainly doesn't mean they can't be attracted to other genders too. There's nothing wrong with liking the idea of a relationship between David Tennant and Michael Sheen, or even, really, with believing they might have feelings for each other. If that's all you're doing, this post isn't about you. What I absolutely cannot excuse is the proliferation of hypocritical, nonsensical, and nasty rumors about the women in their lives.

Nothing Georgia Tennant or Anna Lundberg seems to do is ever good enough. Every expression of positivity is curated and phony, anything that could be perceived as negative vile and mean. I see these women attacked on a daily basis as partners, as mothers, as actresses. Georgia is simultaneously presenting a false ideal of a perfect, happy family for her own gains, while somehow at the same time being too irresponsible and incompetent to be a proper parent. Anna, a still young and up and coming actress herself, is expected to perform the ideal of an affectionate partner on social media, is perceived as unsupportive of Michael when she doesn't, when in reality she may simply be trying to make a name for herself in the industry without people solely associating her with the man she loves. Both of these women share in David and Michael's advocacy for marginalized communities, sometimes in different, more or less obvious ways. David and Michael are always brave and sincere, while Anna and Georgia's actions are always self serving and performative, though no evidence is ever given to indicate that the things they post or charities they support are any sort of cover or deflection. Nor are there ever any reasons given for their perceived lack of onscreen talent, other than that they're "boring" or don't have as many jobs as their husbands- never mind that both of them are in an extremely competitive industry and get perfectly respectable amounts of work, especially for mothers of young children. Worst of all, I've seen them accused of things as awful as child abuse and rape, all for the crime of simply being married to the wrong men. It's all so horribly gendered too, David and Michael often referred to as the "men" while Georgia and Anna are reduced to negative stereotypes of nagging, shallow gold diggers. As a fandom populated with so many queer people, many of whom, myself included, have found freedom from gender roles with Michael and David's characters' help, I thought we knew better.

I've been lucky enough to meet both David and Georgia now, and have witnessed firsthand the easy, joyful affection they have for each other when no one of consequence is watching, the way they giddily hold hands on the street and make each other laugh while tenderly looking into each other's eyes even and especially after sixteen years together. Georgia when I met her was incredibly kind, down to earth, and approachable, and my partner, who's met her several times more than I have, gushes about her constantly- how funny, authentic, and intelligent she is, and of course, how much she and David love each other, how they look out for each other and adore each other's flaws and quirks. David of course still gushes about Georgia every chance he gets in speeches and interviews, her strength and brilliance as well as her beauty, and Georgia, while maybe not always as effusive, shows her love for David in plenty of ways, the beautiful candid photos she takes of him, for instance. There's such a soft, painterly tenderness and fondness in them, for the man, not just the dazzling star everyone else gets to see. Her David, gentle, devoted, goofy, aging, melancholy, imperfectly perfect David. Where would we be without Georgia giving us these little glimpses of him? I suspect the same people who deride Georgia's social media presence as try-hard, cringeworthy, artificial, would feel a bit differently if one day they stopped coming.

I can't speak as clearly on behalf of Anna and Michael, but the accounts I've gotten of her and Michael's relationship from eyewitnesses have presented it as no less loving than David and Georgia's, albeit in slightly different ways. Even then, why should I have to? She doesn't owe me anything. I doubt anyone who's made the posts accusing Anna and Georgia of being nasty baby trappers has ever had children. There's no such thing as a perfect mother, and even one child is a massive task. It's normal to not be a shining ray of affection all the time, and Georgia I know more than makes up for it with her fierce love and support for her children in all of their endeavors. Georgia is also a diagnosed neurodivergent woman, and so many of the remarks I see directed at her are clearly discriminatory and often directed at women with her diagnoses. Everyone coos over how charming David is when he shows signs of being AuDHD, but the second his wife does too, she's careless and cold. And don't even get me started on when photos of Michael and David looking anything less than beatifically happy get interpreted as them being miserable due to their wives treating them so poorly. THEY'RE HUMAN BEINGS!!! NEUTRAL FACIAL EXPRESSIONS EXIST!!! WOULD YOU BE A SPARKLING RAY OF SUNSHINE IF YOUR DISNEYLAND RIDE GOT STUCK!!!

I say all this now not even because I think I have any hope of stopping the people in question, but because one of the main fighters on the front of the opposition, @dtmsrpfcringe, has been both a wonderful online friend to me and dealt with even worse abuse than that which gets hurled at Anna and Georgia on the daily. When my blog was briefly overrun by TERFs in light of the Tennant/Badenoch/Sunak drama, Tori was the first person to stand up for me, and as she recieves more vitriol in one day than I've ever experienced in my entire life online, I think I've taken far too long to do the same for her. This woman has dealt with doxing threats, attacks on her character, and most horrific of all, wishes of death upon her and her baby. No one would blame her for stopping, but she has remained steadfast in her mission to call bs where she sees it, and she shouldn't have to do it alone. Tori, I think you are so brave, and I am proud to stand in solidarity with you against the misinformation, meanness, and misogyny that threaten to corrupt this fandom we call home.

Even after all we've been through over the past couple of months, I still believe the Good Omens fandom and David and Michael's individual fandoms to be places of kindness, empathy, and inclusivity. Which is why such cruel behavior (because there's no other word for it) is utterly disappointing and baffling to me. You should be utterly ashamed of yourselves. You're the exact kinds of people David and Michael speak out against on a weekly basis, and I guarantee that if you engage in the kinds of behavior I've highlighted here, they would be disgusted with you. Or maybe they'd simply pity you, because your lives are so empty that you've decided the only way to fill them is to sacrifice the reputations and peace of innocent women on the altar of a relationship that in all likelihood takes place solely in your own heads.

And if you read all this and find you still ship David and Michael, which even I do sometimes, well, there's always polyamory.

I'm sleepy! good night and kindly fuck off! - Lauren

[merakiui]

Hi Mera hope you had a wonderful day night!

I was wondering who you thought, out of the test boys, would be the most likely to try to steal you away from your partner? (Also can I be >_< Anon?)

Hi hiiii, >_< anon!!!! :D omg this is a fun question!!! I think these are the characters who would try to steal you from your partner:

✧ Riddle - if your partner is anyone from Octavinelle (i.e. the trio), Riddle is working overtime to find a way to get you out of there... T^T he will not have you succumb to the bad influences that are the Leech twins and Azul. Riddle has such strict criteria a person must meet in order for them to even be perceived by him as your partner, and no one's managed to earn his approval yet, thus your current partner is not worthy of being called your partner. Quite ironic how he's the only one who can fit into his own criteria. Perhaps he's just destined to be your boyfriend after all. :)

✧ Ace - it's for such a shallow reason, too. He just wants what he doesn't have. T_T especially if you're Deuce's partner. Ace just likes to be a menace, but in being a menace he unintentionally falls for you and now he's really determined to make you his.

✧ Trey - he does it so subtly!!!! You won't even know Trey's aiming to steal you from your partner when he packages leftover baked goods and sends them your way or when he texts you good morning/good night. He's just being friendly, but Trey knows the way to anyone's heart is through delicious food (his boy-next-door charm is just an added bonus). He's hard at work learning all of your gastronomic preferences so that he can effectively win your affections. That, and he's surprisingly discreet with his flirting (whether he intends to be or not).

✧ Cater - it really depends with Cater. He's so good at being a social butterfly, and he knows just how to pop in and snatch you away from your partner for fun photo ops. He just loves being around you, so much so that he may end up third-wheeling you and your partner. He invites himself into your life and before you realize it you're hanging out more and more with Cater than you are with your partner. But it's okay! You don't really need your partner anyway, do you? Not when you have Cay-Cay!

✧ Leona - he knows he's king in Savanaclaw, so it's absolutely mind-boggling to him that you'd settle for some herbivore at the bottom of the food chain. Leona doesn't even have to try very hard to steal you from your partner. He has such an enticing, confident energy about him. That, and no one's going to try to go against the Leona Kingscholar. You might as well start calling yourself (Name) Kingscholar now because your partner can never hope to compete with Leona. <3

✧ Ruggie - also another one that's situation-dependent. If Ruggie truly does like you, then he's willing to exert the energy to come up with a sly scheme to separate you and your partner. He's very good at it, too. Immensely sneaky. >:) you'll never even know he was the reason for the inevitable split.

✧ Azul - it's tako. Envy and greed are such a potent, destructive combination, and he wants you all to himself.

✧ Jade - he's willing to play the long game. Jade will make your partner wish they never even fell in love with you. He is so refined and ruthless in the way he goes about pursuing you while also pulling strings to slowly but surely integrate himself into your life. Your partner won't stand a chance.

✧ Floyd - he's quick with it. No mind games or elaborate cons needed. He'll beat your partner up and collect you in the aftermath.

✧ Jamil - he's doing everything behind the scenes, and it all comes together in a devastatingly neat package. Jamil keeps track of his lies, expertly weaving a web that ultimately leaves you ensnared and partner-less in the very end. You don't need to worry about details. Jamil will be vague and terse about it. :)

✧ Kalim - he does it unintentionally (or maybe he's fully aware of it). Kalim has so much love for you, so it hurts him when he sees how happy you are with your partner. :( he wants to be in that spot! He wants you to call him your boyfriend and he wants to be able to hold and kiss you and take you on dates. He lavishes you with extravagant gifts under the guise of friendship and constantly shows up to your dates. It's pure coincidence, but Kalim has a way of making you and your partner feel so suffocated because neither of you can ever get a word in with him. In the aftermath of your heartbreak, Kalim's there to pick up the pieces.

✧ Vil - ooooo Vil....... he has so much to say about your partner. So many critiques to give. He is the biggest hater when it comes to your relationship. It should be him you call your beloved, not that sorry spud who calls themself your partner. Vil knows his worth and that it’s pointless to compete when he will ultimately be the victor. He constantly checks up on your social media to see if that taken status ever changes, but it will in due time. Vil knows how to play this role flawlessly.

✧ Rook - it's Rook. If Rook doesn't drive your partner away because of how strange he is, then he will stalk you from the shadows until paranoia and dread nearly consume you and drive you into isolation. You'll spend less time with your partner because now you're too afraid to go out, lest you run into your stalker. Rook will come to collect you soon. He shan't make the love of his life wait any longer!

✧ Epel - maybe he's trying to prove that he can get a partner, or maybe he's just feeling competitive knowing that your partner has you and he doesn't. Epel knows he should be your partner, so he's determined to win you over, even if it means he has to act, Great Seven forbid, cute to achieve his goals.

✧ Malleus - it's likely unintentional. Perhaps a passing comment about how he's interested in you and suddenly all of Diasomnia is vowing to bring you and Malleus together. Whoever was dating you immediately breaks up with you when they find out Malleus is crushing on you. There are just some battles you shouldn't fight...

✧ Lilia - love is war, so Lilia might play a little unfairly when he finds himself enthralled. He can't help it for being so devilishly cute! Of course you'd fall for him and his adorable charms, too. Who wouldn't? He's old, so he has plenty of experience in the art of romantic warfare. He's determined.

✧ Neige - it is absolutely intentional and he's so obvious about it. >_< Neige is so obsessed with you!!!! He wants you all to himself, so could your partner do him a favor and break up with you so that Neige can have you instead? :D and no one could possibly say no to Neige! He's just so sweet and so famous and he could ruin your partner with his sheer influence alone. But he won't. <3 so long as he gets to have you hehe.

✧ Rollo - he disapproves of everyone you date. It doesn't matter if they're a decent person; he dislikes them regardless. Anyone who isn't him is undeserving of being your partner. Only Rollo can fill that space, and he fully intends to do so in his own little ways. You'll tell your partner that you're only joining the student council president for breakfast because you want to be friendly, but it's during these meetings where Rollo acts like his charming, cordial self. He reserves rare smiles for you and is genuinely upstanding and sweet. But only for you. And soon you'll fall for him. At least, that's what he hopes will happen. If not, he can resort to drastic measures. Anything for you.

[dutchdread]

Ouch, that's gotta hurt.

Watching Cleriths celebrate NPTK these past weeks, knowing they'll, as always, be proven incorrect has been an exercise in patience. Sometimes it's just clear that you won't be able to convince people of a complex truth when so often discourse is limited to 280 characters. The reason Clerith exists is that people are unable to see the big picture, it survives by people squinting and not seeing the "but" that's located right after every piece of evidence they put forward. This means that you'll often be perceived to be arguing against what is to them the blatantly obvious. It's futile, nuanced argument never wins from emotion, so often you just have to take solace in the idea that "well, it will be fun to see their surprise 4 years from now". So when you get an interview like this, mere weeks after the game releases, which confirms everything that Clotis had been saying about, and had been mocked for, NPTK, you can't help feel a sense of schadenfreude.

Man that's gotta hurt. This is the difference between Clotis and Cleriths. Cleriths don't really like Aerith, because they want to assassinate her character. Rather than a sad tragic tale of a lifetime of love and loss they want to reduce her character to a shallow cliche rom-com about a capricious girl whose fickle affections change by the hour. The fact that the first person Aerith starts developing feelings for after 5 years of pining after Zack is a man who is almost literally channeling Zack becomes a meaningless coincidence in the story. The fact that she knows Cloud for 2 weeks, most of which is also spent pining over Zack is viewed as confirmation of how special their love is. It doesn't matter that Aerith doesn't even know who Cloud is. It doesn't matter that Cloud is shown to very obviously be in love with another woman. It doesn't matter that Cloud is clearly losing his mind. It doesn't matter that Cloud is constantly show as being apathetic towards her advancements. Even them fighting is recontextualized as "good chemistry" just to avoid facing reality. Usually nonsensical romances are seen as bad-writing, but here the cope makes people excuse all the nonsense as "how brilliantly written is this story? They love each other despite it making no sense, now THAT is romance". Zack is called irrelevant, CC is a "ret-con" and can be ignored, ACC is about how romantic it is to want to die to be with someone. The reason Zack is so predominant in Rebirth is in no way connected to Aerith yearning for exactly the bond he's constantly showing to have with her. The contrast with Clouds apathy means nothing, he definitely isn't there to have some sort of pay-off with Aerith in part 3. Nah, he's just there to give Cloud and Aerith his blessing and to F-off. The reason Tifa is silent and heartbroken at the end has nothing to do with her best friend dying and the man she loves losing his mind. The distance between her and Cloud at that moment is totally not used to illustrate the severity of the situation, or to set-up Tifas importance in the events for part 3. Nah, she doesn't get lines because she's just a side character duh!. That is how they think, every single character and story is assassinated, everything happens only to service Cloud and Aeriths romance, even Cloud and Aerith themselves are pushed through the mud. Screw the death of Ifalna, screw the death of Zack, screw the complexity surrounding Clouds Zack shaped psychology, screw Aeriths childhood and desire for real bonds of friendship, screw even the story of Aerith dying and how maybe, JUST MAYBE, the scenes surrounding Aeriths death have SOMETHING to do with the strong emotions surrounding death rather than just being "a cute romance scene uwu". Never have I seen any story interpretation reveal such rampant hatred for a character as Cleriths reveal for Aerith. To them, Aerith is totally the kind of person who would bond with Tifa, hear the very personal and intimate story about the promise shared between her and Cloud, hear that Cloud thinks that Zack is dead, and not 5 minutes later write a story about how "she loves Cloud and they wouldn't need no promises like that other girl". But sure, I'm the one who hates Aerith, not the people who think this is who she is, but me, the person who assumed she'd be less vile than that and that any song she'd write would encompass more than that. I stand up for her character and get mocked, called an Aerith hater, and called "toxic"....and then you get an interview like this. God it feels good to always have all your positions validated by future content. One has to wonder if the people still arguing for Clerith ever sit back and think "wait, the last 100 times I dismissed these peoples arguments I was proven wrong almost immediately, I am constantly having to shift my goalposts while they're just happily sitting there laughing as they consume media about Cloud kissing Tifa, or proclaiming to become her special existence....maybe I am the delusional one...." God I can't wait for part 3, it will be hilarious.

[wheelsnipecelebrini]

I failed at not throwing my hat into the ring about That Article. Whoops!

It's truly been fascinating to see the number of angles from which the writer has managed to piss people off. Like damn! That was not a brief post, but I could probably write 6x its word count and not be done saying things about it, and frankly none of them are particularly kind. It's hard to know where to start.

But I think neonfretra hit the nail on the head when they said that probably a core reason this article is pissing everyone off is that it's not doing what it asserted. It's not in any way a successful analysis of masculinity in hockey, "changing" or otherwise, because that's ultimately not what it's about. Of course its gender analysis is flimsy as hell and its dashed-off references to race and xenophobia feel emptily perfunctory and it seemingly thinks the writer and his friends invented woman+ interest in sports and its supporting proof of hockey's changing standards (my guy are you seriously asserting the boston bruins invented goalie head taps or whatever in 2022) all seem to be from three years ago, because it's about a particular subset of stan twitter trying to make sense of and defend their love of the game and the fandom. Which imho is actually a good thing; I think self-reflection is great, but in order to do that successfully you have to be clear on what you're looking at. "Why do I like this thing?" is a different question than "why is this thing so gay, actually?" I'm a gay person, I can make anything gay. Me making it gay and it being gay are not the same thing, actually, and it's a real unforced error to confuse the two. The piece itself comes off as pretty confused on that point despite defining the distinction in its preamble.

So that's one thing that I'm stuck on, the way these assessments of gender and queerness seem to take for granted that they're grounded in factual observation / serious study and not projection.

I don't know how you look at a group of like-minded people all deciding Quinn Hughes is eldest daughter-coded and never entertain the idea that this says a lot about those people and really nothing at all about Quinn Hughes. Fixating on the idea of Mitch Marner being the first male victim of misogyny is pretty shallow and unserious in part because that's kind of one of the core foundations of the enforcement of masculinity, that the worst thing a man can be is a woman; neither hockey nor sports generally invented it and the last few years of hockey fandom didn't invent calling it out. Mitch Marner is not remotely close to the first male person who gets shit shoveled at him because he's perceived to be doing personhood in a feminine way, and I shouldn't need to explain that to someone who is positing that they've unlocked hockey gender with One Weird Trick.

I'm not the first to point out that the writer confidently describing Brock Boeser's reaction to his "Mr. Sensitive" nickname as "playful" seems like a serious misreading. You can be very happy to see something in your favorite fixations that makes you feel seen etc, but you feeling seen or validated does not mean that that's what's on offer. I'm glad that people find it relatable, interesting, and wonderful to see men crying, but I'm uncomfortable that they seemingly haven't entertained the idea that the crying men perhaps conceive of their public tears quite differently than the gender studies enthusiast and/or fandom critter observing them might. Do you get what I mean? It feels, to me, akin to someone without prompting telling a fat person that the bravery they exhibit by wearing a crop top and not hiding their belly rolls makes them, someone seeing said fat person, feel better about their own bodily imperfections. Like maybe that's true, but you might wanna sit with that for a second and also conclude that it's an inside thought. "You're so brave for not being able to stifle tears about your dying father, it makes me feel like your gender is getting less problematic to enjoy" -- thanks I guess??? In some ways, all of this is basically agreeing with the regressive enforcement and conceptions of gender but doing it with a thumbs up. "Yeah man we all agree Mitch Marner is a girly little fruit, but when I say it I'm being approving."

Again, you can have these conversations, you can force-femme hockey players to the ends of gender and back with any degree of sincerity that appeals to you. These are public people, you ain't hunting them for sport. Go ahead! It's fun! But being convinced that your identification with or fixation on a public figure you do not know says something definitive about them or the milieu in which they exist and were formed is not particularly, uh. Good. To say nothing of the fact that "man is the Bad Gender and being Less Man is intrinsically Better" plays into some really, really tired transphobic nonsense. If you need to mitigate the man-ness of your blorbos in order to feel like you're enjoying them in a god-honoring way, then that's a you thing and I think it might be preferable to leave Johnny Gaudreau out of it. Somewhat relatedly, a cursory skimming of more than the last few years might have lead you to the treasure trove of fics and other fandom errata about the dainty woman-coded sensitivity of a certain player formerly on the Chicago Blackhawks, and I think we all know how insightful that perception ended up being. Many such cases, as they say.

I could go on and on and on in What The Hell Are They Teaching In Gender Studies Classes These Days and so many other ways, but I think it's probably good to cut myself off here, especially because it's all already been talked to death. Dear god do not release the next two parts, this is not the enrichment any of us need in any of our enclosures.

[joelsmochi]

Playing Dangerous

SUMMARY: female Reader, who works for the Cartel, received instructions to burn down a house for her boss. Javier went to arrest her, but once she realized he wouldn't play the same games as her, she knew she needed to offer up something else as her ticket to freedom... WARNINGS: 18+, no use of Y/N, power play, prostitution & bribery if you look close, unspoken degradation, handcuffs, unprotected piv sex, creampie, lots of good girl bombs, car sex (one day i’ll write good smut in a bed…one day) WC: 4.9k - It is finally here. The second story in my LDR series. So sorry for the long wait, but I hope you enjoy ♡

masterlist

You just can’t stay out of trouble, can you?

You were standing on your small porch with an admirably handsome DEA agent questioning you about a fire. You knew you had the upper hand here when you noticed his eyes casting over your half-naked body that glistened with a light layer of sweat.

“Do you know anything about that, ma’am?” He asked you softly; you knew he knew it was you, but what proof did he have?

You just smirked and shifted your weight from one foot to the other. “No, sir,” you cooed while pursing your lips.

He cleared his throat hastily and his eyes narrowed. “Really? Because witnesses say you’re the one responsible.”

Apparently, he had enough proof.

You shrugged, maintaining eye contact with him. “Everybody knows that I’m a good girl, officer.”

His body tensed at your voice’s softness but he maintained his composure for the most part. A breeze passing by gave your skin goosebumps and made your nipples perk up; he briefly daydreamed about his tongue twirling around it, feeling annoyed that he was thinking about something like that during a stressful time for him.

“It’s Agent,” he corrected.

Your eyebrows raised and you gave him a fake apologetic look. “Oh, my apologies.”

“So… It wasn’t you?”

“No, I wouldn’t do a thing like that.”

And it was mostly true. You preferred a less obvious way of taking out enemies and outposts, but your boss’s boss wanted everyone to know who was still in charge here. You disagreed with the approach but didn’t argue. After all, they do pay your bills.

“Are you sure?” He edged, sensing how you wanted to play games with him. He was over it, and to be frank, your short and thin nightgown had his head full of inappropriate thoughts that made him want to hurry up and get home to fuck his fist.

He hated how pretty you were in the moonlight with your makeup from the day still on, but his wandering eyes saw how fresh your lipstick was. He perceived it as your way of trying to seduce him, or whatever officer came by, and being turned on by it pissed him off even more.

“I heard from the neighbors that the house was already on fire,” you said simply with a swift shrug, but his warm and inviting eyes suddenly turn shallow and cold; you were thrown off of your game of lies so you attempted to change the subject. “Gosh, I’m all exposed here in my nightgown… Do you mind if I go and cover up? You’re more than welcome to come inside.”

Yeah. Right. Javier may be attracted to you, but he’s not stupid. You could take this as an opportunity to shoot him or kidnap him.

As harmless as you look, you were still one of Escobar’s employees and they typically did whatever they needed to survive with confidence. This just wasn’t a chance Javier could take.

“Nice try. Come on, hands on your head,” he said contemptuously while unveiling his handcuffs.

You frowned feeling confused at the sudden shift of his energy, stuttering over your own words as you defiantly obliged.

His eyes avoided yours as he readied the cuffs and stepped closer to you to make the arrest official. He didn’t care to be gentle with you either — why should he?

After all, you did almost kill someone tonight.

His slender fingers jabbed at your ribcage as his hand forced your body to turn around; you felt a few knuckles crack uncomfortably from how hard he pulled your hands from above your head to the small of your back.

“Do you really have to put those tight handcuffs on me?” You asked when he clicked the cuffs a little too far. He didn't respond.

He tried to keep his eyes off of how plump your ass looked beneath the thin gown, but it was hard when the force of his hands moving your body as he cuffed you made your ass jiggle effortlessly.

But still, he maintained composure.

You accepted your fate, but you still wanted to try to earn your freedom. Something you’d never done before but weren’t ashamed to do. Not when a man this handsome wears his heart — or rather, his cock on his sleeve.

He pulled at your arm roughly and began walking you to his car. The lack of communication from him only prompted you to speak even more.

“Please, I’ll do anything,” you said.

Still nothing.

“Please, officer, I will do anything.”

Fuck… How he would give almost anything to bend you over and—no.

He knew that you were just trying to get off scot-free, and he couldn’t—wouldn’t let that happen.

“Anything you like, sir,” you cooed oh so sweetly it nearly gave him a toothache.

He stopped you right in front of the car to glare at you. At least he tried to. Your smile was smug yet innocent, and your eyes expressed an eagerness foreign to him.

You weren’t a prostitute, and he knew that from your record. You weren’t the type to sell your body, so… Why do it now? He wondered if you were trying to be let go or maybe…? No, no, it can’t be that…

He realized he’d been in thought too long when he looked back into your eyes, and that eagerness hadn’t left. Was it possible you really just wanted to have sex with him?

The light in your eyes gleamed different than most of the women he’d been with — he just couldn’t put his finger on the particular emotion.

“Nobody has to know if that’s what you’re worried about,” you whispered as your eyes faltered to his partially exposed chest.

Oh.

The excitement and eagerness and anticipation he was picking up from you? It was rebellion. You didn’t want to have sex with Javier. What you wanted was to lay in bed with the enemy. It all made sense.

And it made him undeniably weak in the knees. His stomach flipped just thinking about it.

“Sounds like that’s what you’re worried about,” he retorted.

A flicker of vulnerability highlights your eyes that wasn't unnoticed by him. He didn’t understand why his body was under so much hesitation by your damsel in distress act.

Maybe it was how you called yourself a good girl even though everything about you screamed otherwise. Your short gown and your evilly beautiful smile… Your cockiness and playful personality…

Or maybe Javier had just gone too long without any.

“Let’s get in the back of your cop car, officer,” you keenly propose; though the repetition of officer had him gritting his teeth, he no longer wanted to hold off your fantasy of betrayal. “You can ask me anything you want.”

“Anything?”

You simpered at the way his eyebrows raised and nodded. “Anything.”

He didn’t hesitate with your negotiation, using his broody arm to swiftly pull you to the side of the Jeep before he opened the door for you.

He shouldn’t be doing this. No, Steve is gonna kill him. What kind of person takes sex from an arsonist as a bribe? Had his standards for morality really dropped that low? But he caught a glimpse of the still-burning fire in the distance and decided: what the hell?

He climbed in after you and shut the door, thankful you live in a more than secluded area. He could have been a gentleman and taken you to your bedroom. He just didn’t want to.

He studied you like any of Escobar’s other men — and you surprised him tonight. You were notorious for being hardheaded (that had only been proven correct tonight), but you also had the reputation of making men your bitch.

So he couldn’t help but wonder… What made him so different that you’d degrade yourself for an arrest that probably wouldn’t have even held up anyways?

Were you that desperate? Didn’t matter. He was going to find out.

“Do you have a girl?”

Your question threw him off. “Hmm?” He raised a questioning eyebrow.

“I don’t see a ring on your finger,” you said instead of repeating yourself.

“Uh, no,” he said though he wasn’t entirely sure what the truth was at this exact moment. “No Misses… Is that seriously where you draw the line?”

You grinned and giggled loudly, shifting to find comfort within your current restraint. “No, but that does make this a little less fun.”

He couldn’t ignore how his cock antagonized his jeans, enthusiastically twitching against his zipper. He cleared his throat and spread his thighs to try and give his member some room to breathe, to no avail.

His tone was mean and cold as he spoke. “Is that what this is? Fun?”

Your smile faltered almost entirely, replacing itself with a much more shy one. No man who was only minutes away from fucking you had ever spoken like that. You couldn’t deny the insecurity that suddenly rose inside of you.

“It doesn’t have to be,” you said bashfully, unintentionally batting your eyes at him and cowering your head down. As embarrassed as you were, you almost enjoyed it: the shame and the submission eradicated any impulsiveness within you. 

This was no longer an escape plan but a mere effort to make him remember you.

“…I can ask you anything?” He asked after squinting at you. He tried his best not to smile when he realized he was getting to you.

“Anything you want,” you said just barely above a whisper.

He watched you look at him through your eyelashes with admiration glowing in your pretty eyes. He took your chin between his thumb and index finger to tilt your head up a little; he gave you a crooked smile before asking, “Are you a good girl?”

Your heart leaped inside your warm chest. You wanted to stoop to his level and be mean and taunting right back, but you just fucking couldn’t.

God, he was handsome. So dark yet so bright. With a mysterious charisma that no other man could possess, he had you wrapping yourself around his finger. So… You try to appease him.

“That’s what I said, isn't it?”

You didn’t hear how harsh it came out, so it was a surprise when his gentle fingers wrapped tightly around your jaw below your chin. You whimpered and leaned your chest to his forearm, giving him goose skin.

“I’m sorry,” you breathed out. “I didn’t mean to—“

“Shh,” he whispered, “I know.” He teasingly moved your head around and half-smiled again. “Did you set the house on fire?”

“I—“

His grip tightened, resulting in your cheeks and lips being squished up a little. “I’ll know if you’re lying.”

“Y—yes. I did.”

“C’mere.” His hand remained clamped around your jaw while he managed to guide you atop his lap; he used his free hand to undo the button and zipper on his jeans and then reached beneath your nightgown and rubbed your panty line. “Good girl… Right?” You could only nod at his question, untrusting of your voice. His grip loosened so that he could trace his thumb over your tinted cheeks. “S’this what you really want?”

You gave him a daunting smile and nodded once more. “Yes.”

His hands disappeared below your gown; his right arm wrapped around your hips to lift you slightly while his left hand reached for his semi-hard length, pulling it out with a hard tug.

He kept his pouted brown eyes on yours the entire time, wanting to see every movement your face made. He pulled your panties to the side and let his swelling head meet your entrance.

Javier admired your patience — even dragging the head of his cock back and forth along your pussy lips for a minute wouldn’t make you act out of line. You wanted to prove to him how good you were so that he could forget all of the bad things you did.

He carefully placed his cock head at your entrance and slowly let go of your hips so that you could take your time to adjust to him.

A contentious sigh fell from his lips when he felt how tight you were compared to his girth. He took the liberty of undoing the rest of his shirt while you tried to gather enough stability to fully sink onto him, but with the lack of foreplay, a pain-filled hiss was heard by you.

“Take it slow,” he instructed confidently. “Take what you can.”

A sense of relief washed over you, and for the time being, you only took a couple of inches inside your needy cunt. You exhaled softly as you raised your hips kindly and slid back down.

Javier watched with attentive eyes, finding the little frown forming on your face adorable. Your eyes were shut with focus as you tried to maintain balance and a slow but consistent pace.

“Fuck,” you whispered, feeling the slight burning sensation of him stretching you out slowly dissipate into pure pleasure as your slick walls relaxed around him, allowing you to take more of his length in.

Even though his eyes were on your face, all his focus was on how tightly your sopping pussy squeezed around him. He loved how your pussy clenched around him to adapt to his girth. If your pussy felt this good now, he couldn’t wait to know how much better it’ll get when you come.

“Why’d you set the house on fire?” He asked randomly.

“What?” Your movements faltered, and you frowned at him. Is that seriously what’s on his mind right now?

“Did I say you could stop?” He said darkly.

You hesitated, stuttering out a, “N—no.”

But you were too lost in his stern eye contact to start riding him again.

So with one brief movement, he forced your hips down so that his cock filled you. A cry of pain left your lips, and you unintentionally tightened your knees against his thighs, which he didn’t seem to mind.

You were sure to not waste another moment, so you lifted your hips and took everything in again, but he filled you to your brim.

The bulbous head of his dick grazing against the peak of your cervix became more comfortable within a few more movements, and you finally gained enough composure to answer his question.

“I do everything the boss tells me to. Mnh…” You breathed heavily and settled at a steady pace, feeling your arms beginning to lock up behind you. “I don’t question it. I just do it.”

He surprised you by thrusting into you once as you were lifted, but he was careful not to go too deep. “Okay… I believe you.”

You grinned and sank onto him completely. “What’s your real name?” You asked him, leaning your face closer to his.

He stared plainly at your eyes and held his breath for a moment. “Javier.”

You rewarded him by going up…then down again. You watched how his body responded to the slow but forceful movement. “What a pretty name,” you complimented. “Do you prefer Javier… Or something else?”

“I’d prefer it if you stopped teasing me,” he groaned through clenched teeth. You felt his body tense up despite the lack of physical contact.

Your eyes battered back and forth in brief ponder. You wanted to tease him a little longer, make him beg for it even, but you had to remind yourself that he was in charge whether you liked it or not.

“Can you hold onto me for a second?” You asked, which he seemed happy to do.

Something about feeling up the smooth fabric that clad your body sent shivers down his spine and straight to his dick.

His long fingers found their way around your waist, and you trusted his grip enough to shift onto your feet so that you were squatting on him.

“Okay,  now I need you to put your arms under my thighs,” you instructed, praising him when he listened. “Just hold me steady, okay?”

You didn’t give him much time to respond before raising your body until his cock was almost entirely out of you, then you slammed your hips back down so that he filled you again.

He couldn’t prevent the pathetic and loud whimper that escaped his throat. The slight change in the position provided more than enough pleasure to make his entire body jerk. His hands instinctively grabbed the cuff of your ass as you repeated the motion at a relentless pace with an intense force every time you squatted.

At this angle, your walls gripped around him so much he grew afraid he would come too soon, but he couldn’t stop — he didn’t fucking want to.

Everything felt too good. You were so wet for him, and he felt your hot precum leak out of you and coat his balls. Your ass was warm but still covered in goosebumps from how his cock stretched you out so sweetly — nothing was painful anymore. Not even your handcuffed wrists.

Seeing the pure bliss spread across his face was motivating you to continue. His eyes were shut, and his eyebrows were raised with concern. You watched as his tongue flicked across his bottom lip between the helpless moans he let out.

When he noticed how quiet you were, he looked at you worriedly, but you were just focused on being good for him. He saw how heavy your eyes were and how you were almost biting back your moans.

“That feel good?” You asked when you saw him look.

His eyebrows stitched together as he profusely nodded and gripped even more of your ass. “Yes, fuck yes, keep going,” he encouraged.

The strap to your gown slipped down your shoulder enough to reveal part of your nipple. Javier was inclined to fully unveil your breast, but something about almost seeing all of you was more invigorating, at least for the time being.

All these feelings were too much: he had to come, but he didn’t want to stop. But your velvety walls only felt like they were getting tighter and tighter.

You felt him getting close with how his body kept twitching, flinching, and tensing up with every squat. His moans grew breathy and hitched rather than full of bass. He wouldn’t be able to hold off any longer.

He let you get him as close as possible. So fucking close. His body was on fire, and his head fell back against the seat again.

His cock was tortured by the slickness of your walls that dared him to empty himself inside of you, but when an inch of his orgasm had begun, he was quick to push your hips up and slip himself out of you.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he shouted. You chuckled, shifting back to your knees for comfort, then leaned forward to kiss him. He looked up at you again and gave you an embarrassed smile. “Fuck, sorry,” he laughed against your lips. His laugh was so sweet and gentle.

You loved the way he talked and how hollow his voice sounded. His words were bitter, but his voice tasted so sweet.

He gave you another kiss while lifting you off his lap; he guided your body so that you were on your knees facing the window before pulling your panties aside again to slip back into your glistening pussy.

You gasped at the newfound depth and rested your head on the seat, smiling when you felt him tug at the link connecting the handcuffs.

This was wrong.

The lack of respect you had for your colleagues and bosses got you here. Fucking ‘the enemy’. It felt so good to decide on your own, to betray them. It was like Javier took a lighter and ignited every flame inside of you again.

He pleased parts of you that he wasn’t aware of, and you couldn’t be bothered to let it end so soon. Not when rebellion tasted so sweet and fucked you so good.

Javier noticed you biting your lip again to quiet yourself — yet another habit you picked up on from previous partners — and hated it. He loved having vocal partners, even if words weren’t being said. He felt a little insecure, wondering if he wasn’t doing a good job, but your trembling body told him otherwise.

“Com’ere,” he said, lifting your upper half from the seat. His clad chest pressed against your back with the cool metal of the handcuffs hovering over your ass, and he kissed your jawbone before trailing a lick up your ear. “Don’t hold back for me, baby. Let me hear you,” he pleaded weakly.

Shivers trickled down your body, and you shuddered at the feeling. He smelled of expensive cigarettes, a light layer of musky cologne, and sweat. His scent was so intoxicating and made you even more needy for his touch. His calloused hands grazing over your ass beneath your pajamas tickled your skin and made you exhale loudly.

You felt his hand snake between your bodies before he lined his dick up with your entrance. He pushed it in at an achingly slow pace, making you whine and pout.

“That’s it, that’s my good girl,” he said in a way that sounded like he was laughing at you. His hand palmed your hip as he began thrusting inside you, filling you up nicely each time. “That feel good?”

You nodded and held your breath, making him punish you by reaching around your hip to land firm a smack against your clit. You yelped and flinched, yet found the pain to be a turn-on.

“Yes,” you said, not wanting to be scolded by him any further. “Yes! It feels good.”

He chuckled wryly and began pounding into you at a relentless speed. His thighs slapped against yours, and his grip on your hip tightened.

You let out noises you didn’t even know you could make. Squeaks, yelps, falsettos — all this for Javier, and oh my God, did it bring him close to the edge again.

He wanted you to feel him, touch him. No. He needed you to. He needed your hands to undress him. To tug at his hair and claw at his back. He needed you to hold his face in your soft and clammy palms. He wanted to watch your pretty fingers work patterns on your clit while he bent your legs to your head and fucked into your stomach.

Then, suddenly he began uncuffing your wrists. You were thankful for the relief but tried to contain your excitement. He held the handcuffs in front of your face, then whispered, “You misbehave, and they go right back on. You understand?”

You nodded, shouting out, “Yes,” before gripping his hand on your hips as he still pounded your squelching pussy.

Your eyes rolled to the back of your head when he began hitting your favorite spot at a new angle, fulfilling your need for pleasure in the deepest parts of your heart.

He moved his hand to grip your jaw and pulled your head back so your forehead pressed against his chin. Your back was in discomfort from the arched position, but his cock made up for it.

“Look at you…” He grunted. Your mouth was agape, and your eyes were clenched shut as your raspy moans filled his ears. “So fucking helpless,” he whispered, leaving soft pecks against your forehead. “Fuck, you feel so fucking good, baby girl. Oh.”

You cried out his name as he continued to speak sweet nothings to you. Your nails clawed at his hand at the rise of tension building inside of your stomach.

“You treat me so well, Javier,” you breathlessly spoke. “That feels so good.”

“Yeah?” He kept his momentum up as best he could when he felt your walls flutter around his shaft. It made his head feel dizzy, and his cock ached from wanting to release inside you.

The pressure began to release itself, and you weren’t sure how much longer it’d be before you came. “Can I—fuck! Can I cum? Can I please cum?”

His plump lips neared your ear as he said, “Yes, yes, yes, you can cum for me, pretty girl. You’re such a good girl for me.”

You screamed embarrassingly loud as your pussy flexed and contracted against him at his words, amplifying the orgasm peacocking throughout your body. He released your neck and ran his hands over your shoulder blades as you bent over and fucked him back to ride out your orgasm.

He looked down where you two were connected and saw a thick, white ring of cum wrapped around the base of his cock. He listened to your lowering volume carefully, waiting until you were finished as he didn’t want to overwhelm you.

At least not yet.

“Good…” He paused to land a firm smack on your ass cheek. “…Girl.” Another smack.

You flinched both times, making you both lazily giggle. He nibbled at your earlobe and kissed your neck before directing you to lie down.

You made sure to slouch down a little so that your back was against the seat and your legs up in the air; he rid you of your panties before cupping the back of your knees. He kept your legs pushed back and spread wide open for him as he slowly dipped his cock inside you without assistance.

You watched in awe as he stretched you out again, humming when he filled you and yelping when he pulled out. You laughed when he repeated the action a few times: fill you up, leave you empty…

He loved watching your muscles twitch due to his movements, such as your clit throbbing and your entrance clinging to him.

Finally, he went as deep as he could reach and watched the peak of your belly rise a little. He looked into your eyes and gave you a reassuring smile.

“You okay?” He asked quickly.

“Yeah,” you assured, “that feels good.”

His smile turned to a smirk, and he rocked his hips slowly. “Yeah?” He laughed.

You reached out to hold his face in your hands while biting your lip. He leaned into your touch, closing his eyes. He allowed himself to fall into the euphoric feeling of you.

His mind wanted to remember how all this felt: your walls were so warm with soft edges, but your hands were so smooth against the grain of his beard. Your moans were intoxicating and addictive.

It was all he wanted to hear at this point in time. Who you were before didn’t matter anymore. Fuck no. You were Javier’s newly founded favorite priority, and he’d do anything to feel this good with you again.

He felt he was also rebelling against his morals and nature. How could he resist you, though? Standing there in your cute little nightgown and fresh lipstick on… So naughty and daunting yet so beautiful and obedient.

He reopened his lust-filled eyes and watched you moan and cry for him and for more. Your eyes were narrow, and your lip was swollen from where you were biting. You looked so pathetic beneath him, and it stroked his ego a little too much.

“Look at you.” He leaned his chest down to yours and gave you a sloppy kiss. “Look at you taking my cock like a good girl, hmm?” He laughed bullyingly and smacked the back of your thigh while he rose again. “Play with your pussy, baby girl,” he told you; you obeyed without a second thought and gave yourself the added pleasure. “That’s it, good job… Yeah, keep doing that. Oh-ho, you look so pretty like that.”

You rubbed your clit like you do any other time you touch yourself, but your nerves were already so overwhelmed that you went in a little more rough than usual.

You twisted, pinched, smacked, and rubbed relentlessly at your innocent clit, almost like you were punishing yourself. Javier saw how needy you were to come again and couldn’t hold out much longer.

He was preparing himself to ask you where you wanted him to finish, but he felt you gather some of your cum up from around him before you shoved your slicked fingers into your mouth while maintaining eye contact with him.

He couldn’t control nor stop it.

He was a whimpering and moaning pathetic mess above you.

He collapsed on top of you and finished his orgasm with lazy thrusts, feeling overstimulated sooner than he would have liked to admit.

He lifted his head shamefully and rolled his eyes when he saw your arrogant ass smile.

“Shut up,” he said though you hadn’t said anything. He felt guilty for not giving you a second orgasm, but you were already reaching for your panties and slipping them back on. He sat beside you and tucked his faltering erection in his jeans before zipping them up halfway.

“Gonna keep you inside of me as long as possible,” you whispered seductively in his ear after he lit his cigarette. He rolled his eyes more playfully this time and simpered bashfully. “You still gonna arrest me, Javier?” You chirped after facing him and sitting on your knees.

He breathed out the smoke from his lungs and looked at you while rubbing your half-exposed thigh. “I thought everybody said you were a good girl?”

You grinned, a blush spreading rapidly over your cheekbones. You responded to him by subtly nodding.

“Come ‘ere.” You two shared a kiss that was full of post-sex love and excitement. “If I have to put these handcuffs on you again, I won't be so nice."

[bonemarble]

love all your posts on pb’s books! I’m so glad I came across your blog! what’s your opinion on Leah’s relationships with men outside of bran and Charles? namely Sam, Asil, and Tag? to varying degrees they’re pretty contentious (I’d say with Tag being the least threatening towards her)

not many thoughts about tag and asil! sorry! i never stopped to ponder about their relationship with leah too deeply as they are not very relevant to her overall story. i will keep this ask in mind for future re-reads and post something once i form a more definite opinion.

sam's trickier. his dislike for leah seems stronger than charles's and yet more shallow. a couple of reasons for this, i think:

1) charles dislikes leah as a person. he may not spend much thought on the finer points of her subjectivity and there's a rigidity to their interactions partly engendered by leah's role as bran's wife. but this role is something charles heeds mostly as a practical consideration in order to avoid his father's chastisement. overall, he sees leah as a human being not as bran's appendage. on the other hand, anyone correct me if i am wrong, i think i have only seen sam refer to leah in relation to her impact on one of his family members. somehow telling.

2) sam's relationship with bran has some ideological fractures, but it is not strained by a lack of love or respect: he perceives his place in bran's heart to be very secure. charles, who has suffered firsthand from bran's neglect and has spent a lifetime executing his darkest endeavours, is in a better position to empathise with leah and mistrust that bran's actions towards leah have the best intentions.

3) sam is also much more callous in the fundamental belief women are sexual objects and reproductive factories over which men have automatic rights. if he wasn't, he would have been much less casual and much more conflicted over his treatment of mercy, a teenager he seduced by deliberately assuming a protective role with the sole intention of making her bear his children. leah "refusing" to mother charles and "depriving" bran of the chance for a happier union must mark her as very unnatural in his eyes. and this opinion would have been reinforced by leah targeting mercy since she was young. that she tried to harm mercy is maybe the only element of personal offence he can muster against her. still it seems he only started intervening when he had the brilliant idea that mercy would make a good mate, so...

i don't think there is much more than this on his part tbh, he doesn't spend enough time considering her (as far as i can tell) for anything else to be there.

as for leah, i think she is jealous of him too, but it takes on a different quality compared to her jealousy for charles. sam was in some ways the closest thing bran had to an equal before sherwood reemerged. despite being the third to charles's second, the fact he and bran are so close in age and have so much shared history leaves an understanding between them that no one else can really penetrate. when leah came to live with bran, charles was a child and his opinion probably mattered as such. sam was already sam and probably the only person bran really trusted in the entire continent. i am theorising here, but logically i think at the beginning leah must have been simply intimidated by him and his disdain, probably angry too. overtime, as the goal for her to be bran's life partner became clearer, i think she must have started to resent his role in bran's life. with charles the competition is a bit more fair: bran loves him and will never love her, but at least the playing field to earn his respect trust etc started out somehow more even. how do you compete with samuel?

[local-critter]

Angst alphabet for Asra please.

Which latters? D! And anything else you'd like to do for Asra.

Aside from D for Death, I want them all as Asra, but also know that's way too many. So D.

I'm a little overachiever at times so I did the whole alphabet LMAO

Asra Alnazar Angst Alphabet

A - Austere (what makes them feel uncomfortable and unwanted?)

Being ignored or straight up ghosted; Asra doesn’t like being perceived too much but you’re his whole world, he wants to savor every moment with you to make up for lost time and he feels so shitty when you don’t return the sentiment

B - Bad Habits

Ironically, ghosting. They’ll forget to tell you about a trip until the last minute, or maybe forget to tell you altogether, leading to them just up and disappearing for sometimes days at a time. It’s common when they’re upset or really stressed

C - Crying (do they cry easily? What causes them to crack? How do they cry?)

Asra kinda hates acknowledging most emotions he perceives as negative, so it takes a lot for him to cry. If it’s just because maybe things have been building up for too long but not one specific thing that set him off, just silent tears running down his face. If it is one specific thing he can’t run from, like your death, he just breaks down; it’s messy, there are tears and snot everywhere, his shoulders are shaking violently from the force of his sobs, his breathing is fast and shallow and when he’s done he has a headache from hell and he feels completely hollowed out; he’ll be walking around in a numb daze for a few days afterward, because he just released all the emotions that have been building up for months, maybe years. The first type of cry is a little stream and the second is a raging river; there is no in-between

D - Death (how do they handle the topic? What would they do if their s/o died?)

They don’t handle death well; Asra, post (upright) route holds their loved ones as close to their heart as they can; the thought of any of their loved ones dying can send them straight into a downward spiral of anxiety and dread. Conformation of death sends them straight into either dissociation and denial or a week-long breakdown and then dissociation and denial for a little before they start looking into necromancy with a frantic look in their eyes and terrifying determination. If their significant other died though? Oh boy

They were bad enough the first time but the second, it kills them. Their grief would actually kill them if they lost you again; they would not survive knowing you’re gone and there’s nothing they can do about it because they know they can’t make another deal.

E - Emotion (an emotion they try to suppress)

Anger; he tries so hard to never get angry. He allows himself annoyance, irritation, but never ever anger. Asra is not an angry person in general, there are few times he’s been truly angry at someone, most often Lucio, so he’s come to associate his anger to the former count

F - fights (how do they argue? How quickly do they start an argument? Are they patient with their s/o’s feelings?)

Asra has seemingly endless patience; especially when it comes to you. They were your caretaker for at least a year, probably more, so they’re familiar with your moods and act accordingly. Typically, they let you yell for as long as you need to then when they see you’re done they’ll try and soothe you or give you space, depending on what you need. But when they actually fight back, shit gets real ugly real fast.

You know Asra better than most people in their life; you know Asra better than their parents, you’re second only to Muriel. But Asra knows you too, knows you better than you know yourself sometimes, which means that when you’re both aiming to hurt, it’s all too easy to hit where it hurts for the both of you

G - Guilt (do they feel guilty over something? How do they handle that feeling?)

He’s still guilty for leaving you behind when he left Vesuvia during the plague; he will carry the guilt of your death with him for the rest of his life

H - heartbroken (have they had their heart broken before? Does their S/O have the power to break them?)

Absolutely yes to both. The first time they were heartbroken was the ‘deaths’ of his parents, then when Muriel was in the coliseum, then when you died. And yes, you absolutely have the power to break them; again, you know them better than practically everyone because they’ve never allowed anyone else to truly know them. They’ve given you so much power over them and they’re aware of it, but they gave it to you in the first place because they trust you won’t hurt them.

I - Insecurities

I honestly don’t think Asra is very insecure to be honest; I think he has his moments, like anyone else, but those are few and far between. I think he’d be insecure of leaving you behind and what happened, and afraid you’d leave him for his need to travel. He left you behind and you died; he’s terrified you think he’d leave you to suffer a similar fate again.

J - Jaded (how easily do they become jaded? How do they attempt to get out of that?)

Asra has been jaded for almost their whole life; orphaned and growing up with Vesuvia’s forgotten doesn’t lead to having the happiest outlook on life. Especially since they’ve seen firsthand how cruel the world can be with the Coliseum fights and how Muriel has been treated his entire life

K - killed (what have they killed? Figuratively or literally)

I don’t think Asra has ever killed someone literally. Hurt people before? Absolutely, a gang was after them as a child, so they were forced to be well-versed in self-defense, but never took a life. They definitely killed their morals when you were dead though; they crossed several lines they never wanted to cross before nor again to bring you back

L - lies (what lies do they tell their s/o? Are they a good liar?)

Asra is the best liar you’ll ever meet, but he absolutely hates lying to you. The lies he’d tell you were during your recovery, whenever you’d ask about your past or your memories; he lied only to protect you. After you prove you can finally handle your memories and your past, Asra stops the lies; if there's ever something he doesn’t want to tell you he either tells you he doesn't want to talk about it or deflects and changes the subject

M - mono (do they ever feel alone?)

Not post upright route, not anymore; they know by then that they have a lot of people in their corner, a lot of people in their life; more than they ever thought they’d have. They’re only alone when they want to be because they know they have plenty of people they can seek out if they feel lonely; you’re at the top of that list, of course

N - nightmare (what’s their worst fear?)

Death of a loved one

O - Obstacles (what things have they overcome? How much does it still affect them?)

He’s overcome a lot in his life. The loss of his parents, growing up a homeless orphan, teaching himself and Muriel magic, Count Lucio, the plague, losing you, beating the Devil; Asra has always been a survivor through and through. Of course some of that affects him still; he has nightmares, he has trust issues, he has issues expressing some emotions, but he has people wish shared experiences there and it helps

P - panic (do they panic easily? What instincts do they have? (fight flight, freeze, or fawn))

Asra is typically calm and collected damn near all times, so no, they don't panic very easily but when they do, their first instinct is flight. They avoid conflict whenever possible

Q - quiet (secrets they have)

I don't think Asra would like keeping secrets from his partner, especially after knowing you for almost a decade. I think Asra has things he hasn't told you yet, most likely pertaining to his childhood as one of Vesuvia’s orphaned children, but most likely it's because he doesn't want to acknowledge just how rough his childhood actually was or maybe the right moment to bring it up just hasn't happened

R - rejection (how do they handle rejection of any sort? Have they had a big moment of rejection?)

Asra handles rejection pretty well; they travel a lot so they meet plenty of new people but that also means that if they get rejected they can just leave lmao. If the rejection happens in Vesuvia, they’ll be a good sport about it and won’t make anything awkward, they know they’re not gonna be everyone’s cup of tea and they’re cool with it. They appreciate the honesty too

S - separation (how would they react to a S/O breaking up with them? What would it take for them to break up with their s/o?

If you broke up with him, Asra would be absolutely crushed; he'd respect your decision, maybe try to ask if he'd done something to warrant the breakup, but if you tell him it's because you fell out of love or something he'd never recover; you would deadass never hear from Asra again. He loves you so much still that he can't be part of your life anymore, he can't just be a friend or someone you see every once in a while, it would destroy him; he'd leave Vesuvia all together and probably take Muriel.

I can't really see Asra breaking up with you; he loves you so much, it would take a lot to get him to consider ending it, but I can't think of anything specific

T - trust (how do they break their s/o’s trust? How easily is their trust earned/broken? How would they react to being betrayed?)

Asra's trust takes a long time to earn, so I think it's pretty hard to break. But once it's broken, Asra would never be able to trust you fully again. After the first time there's always going to be lingering doubt about you, I think. They may not even be entirely conscious of their wariness, but it's there all the same.

If you betrayed them, it would destroy them; just crush them completely. It depends on the betrayal itself, of course, but Asra would definitely run. Depending on what you did, they might come back, but it's entirely possible they won't.

Asra would treat your trust like it's fucking frost; the most delicate thing ever. They'd never ever willingly break it, not if they could help it; you mean too much to them for them to ever willingly hurt you

U - urges (what’s something they want but cannot have? Or something they lost and can’t get back)

Asra will always miss the person you used to be; the version of you he left behind. He loves the version of you he has now, he loves you more than he will ever be able to say, but some small part of him will always miss who you used to be, and some part of him will always grieve the love you had/could have had back then

V - volatile (how quickly do they anger? What do they act like when they’re angry?)

Asra doesn’t often get angry; it takes a lot to push them to that point, typically. If you want to them angry fast, bring them to Lucio; he’s practically the only one who can piss them off by merely being near them. Otherwise, it’s incredibly difficult, especially if it’s you that’s angering them. You, Murial, Nadia, and maybe Salim and Aisha are the ones they find it the hardest to get mad at; they love you too much.

But because it takes so much to anger them, when they finally let it out it’s very…explosive, but it’s their magic mainly that’s lashing out. Asra will shout a little, pace around aggressively, but will never really do more than that, and especially won’t get close to you when they’re mad.

W - weak (what makes them feel weak?)

Lucio, typically. He lied to him about his parents so easily, he blackmailed both Asra and Muriel without batting an eye, he killed thousands, you included, without even trying. And Asra couldn’t really do anything about it because, powerful magician he may be, he had no political power while Lucio was the Count. Lucio has hurt almost all of the people Asra cares about and he feels like he wasn’t able to do anything about it

X - X-ray (how readable are their emotions? How good are they at reading their s/o?)

Asra reads you like you’re a picture book tbh because to them, you might as well be. They knew you for several years before you lost your memories, you had to relearn practically everything and Asra was there for every single mood, they saw your new tells and expressions develop, so they know you practically better than you know yourself, meanwhile Asra themself is very difficult to read unless they’ve actively trying to display their emotions. They learned a lot on the streets and few of those lessons were kind.

Y - youth (what kind of childhood did they have? At home and at school)

At home, before the ‘deaths’ of his parents, Asra had a happy life; two loving parents and a home. Afterwards, he had no one and almost nothing, until he met Muriel. Safe to say the majority of his childhood and teenage years were really rough

Z - zero (what would they do if they lost everything)

I truly do not think Asra would survive that; losing everything, they could probably come back from, but losing their loved ones, all of them, would actually kill them.

[otaku553]

The way you described sarie in the tags of your Sabo au reminds me a lot about boa and my favorite interpretation of her love for luffy: that boa isn’t really in love w luffy, she’s just so traumatized that she thinks she’s in love the first time she meets a guy that sees her for the person she is and doesn’t judge her for her past. Sarie seems like she’s the same way, with Sabo treating her well and making her believe that she’s in love when she’s rlly just experiencing decency for the first time

Heheheh yeah! I agree strongly on that for Boa and Luffy, I think that Boa does not actually feel romantic attraction to luffy but is just so alienated from this feeling of platonic friendship as a result of being the object of other people’s attraction and having been exposed to that for so long, what she has with luffy is unique and she comes to perceive it as “love,” just not necessarily the kind of love she thinks it is.

That said, with Sarie, I do feel that it is a bit different! It’s not so much “decency” that she is experiencing for the first time from Sabo, but rather honesty. The problem with being a princess is that everyone tells her that they love her, and at some point, she must realize that these are shallow words that people use to endear themselves to her for ulterior motives. I’ve been turning around this phrase in my head: ‘the realm of nobility is not one in which truths are said.’ Sarie herself is such a strong example of this in canon with her verbal tic of triple negations which make it very difficult to understand her, so playing on that, I think she would also have an intimate understanding of the ways nobles twist words and never say things straight out.

Now take Sabo, who has been one of her suitors for the better part of their teenage years, who she knows his parents have been trying to get with her to get an in to the royal family for ages, and he talks to her the night before she makes the decision on who to marry as the princess, who to choose as the third heir to the throne, and he says: “look. We both know that this is something my parents have always wanted more than me. You don’t have to choose me.” And she asks what he would do if he were king, and he answers about all the people he would help and all the ideas he has to better Goa for the masses, and. She’s charmed. I think Sabo is, if nothing else, capable of being extremely extremely genuine about the good he wants to do in the world, and he makes clear to her, in no uncertain terms, that he would be a good king, but doesn’t want to be king because he both respects her choice and knows that he is doing this for ulterior motives.

That honesty, in his moment of vulnerability, is what wins her over. But not quite just that— it is the way that he is so determined to save others, when she has been thinking for the past years about how miserable he looks and how she wants to save him somehow.

Now also, imagine that Sarie has been told for all her life the words “I love you.” And not a single time has those words been said in truth, in full genuine affection and care for her as a person rather than her as a princess, her as a vehicle to the throne, her as a political token for the royal family, her as a mascot and mouthpiece. I think this honesty that Sabo shows is a lifeline she clings onto, because she knows after his confession that he is capable, in moments of vulnerability, of being honest. And I think she truly wants to hear Sabo say to her, honestly, the words “I love you.” I think she wants to know that there is at least someone in the world that truly loves her, and she just thinks it will be easiest with Sabo because she can give Sabo everything he wants: means to help the people through political authority. She just gives it in what she hopes will be an exchange for his honest love.

I have very many thoughts about Sarie haha :) I don’t think she’s a good person, but I do think she has the potential to be a very complex character. This au is largely my way of examining the ways growing up with nobility might have affected the characters that are most closely associated with nobility. I think they must be very fucked up but in different ways from the main one piece cast and its usual supporting characters.