#and also wishing desperately to have that power
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the essence of sauron's feelings for galadriel makes him the perfect partner for her.
galadriel's greatest desire is to be a queen in her own right, to have power over all else in the kingdom of her own.
and this is sauron's proposal to her.
sauron is not proposing to make galadriel subservient to him, to make her into a consort. he is proposing to give her that which she desires. he would be her consort in that scenario, her queen-maker. he promises to make her stronger than the foundations of the earth, to bring all middle-earth to its' knee to worship the light of its' queen. this is not a description of a queen consort, but of a god queen.
trop doesn't change lotr!galadriel's greatest desire, it just adds more context to it - sauron himself becomes her temptation for power! her desire for him represents her desire for power.
we don't talk enough about how galadriel sees herself as the chosen one. she has a god complex. she believes that there is this greater than life reason why she alone is destined to defeat the darkness and protect the middle-earth, and everyone should accommodate her in her quest of a great glory.
and sauron knows her mind. he sees who she is and who she wishes to be. and he wishes to make galadriel into a great authority she desires to be. he chooses her as his god to worship.
the truth is that they couldn't be any more compatible with one another.
there is more nuance to it. sauron sees his likeness in galadriel, and he empathizes with her when she opens up about being alienated bc of her darkness. he genuinely repents for causing it and chooses to help her achieve her ambition by following her lead. and that is the feeling he wants to bind to his very being, the feeling of being forgiven by the one he had helped ruin when he served the darkness as he helps her heal by serving her light, the feeling of being free of morgoth's darkness through binding himself to galadriel's light. bc in his mind, he can be absolved of this darkness through serving galadriel. in his mind, to heal himself he needs galadriel to need him.
in his mind, galadriel is the one being who is his mirror, she shares his darkness, and yet, she overpowers it with her willpower. so it makes sense that sauron believes only galadriel can free him from morgoth and do so by binding him to herself. sauron sees galadriel as his savior.
sauron's proposal is literally him begging galadriel to bind herself to him by accepting power he offers her. binding that feeling to his very being = bending his knee to worship the light of his queen. and sauron expresses care through servitude and experiences love through worship.
so, subtextually, sauron asks galadriel to accept his love.
his feelings for her border worship and possessiveness, and since she rejects his worship, he resorts to desperately trying to possess her. but the undercurrent of his groping is the same - she is the only one who binds him to the light. as in, the part of him that loves her is the only part of him that is absolved of the darkness. and he wants that feeling back the way he felt it when he fought at her side.
subtextually, it is underlined that sauron tries to recapture her being in his creations, and it is the feeling of being bound to her that he covets. he holds onto their connection and keeps it with him always.
also, sauron and galadriel's compatibility and connection don't make for an inherently corrupt dynamic. in theory, she can be a great leader and he can be her good follower. but as it is, sauron would inevitably cause galadriel to succumb to the darkness and she would never outgrow her pride and greed.
#haladriel#saurondriel#sauron x galadriel#the rings of power#rings of power#sauron#galadriel#trop#galadriel x halbrand#rop#haladriel meta
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May I have a berry crumble please?
[Afab reader]
Just thinking about being angel reader again!! That gets all jealous whenever someone flirts with Jingyi! Little wings behind your ears fluttering and stomping your foot on the floor because can't they see your feather around his neck? It's the same color as yours!!>:[ So the next time these customers come in, the hickeys you left all over his neck are more obvious to them! You're also there hanging onto his arm, huffing and puffing with fluttering little wings. Giving them your best glare through your pout!!
-🍄
˖⁺. ﹙ the greedy demon alchemist x afab reader. ﹚ .𖹭 ݁
. . . why should i look at them when you are here? !! 🍒 : demon ˖ alchemist﹙ verseless jìngyí. ﹚
being his little angel assistant has its perks
“Head alchemist. . . who would this be?” The demon to the left asks, with the clearest hints of disgust on their face.
Mere sightings of angels within the abhorration makes most of it’s denizens wish to barf up yesterday’s dinner and today’s hunt meals.
“My assistant and partner,” he replies with no interest in the customer.
He rarely does show any interest, what is the point of doing so? There is work to be done and potions to be made. Though there is a deep mutual understanding for your agigtation when demons cannot catch the hint.
Power hungry, that is what they are. They see his position in rank and believe they have a chance to rise in demonic hierarchy.
It is a blatant thought to have. As if he would even let them try.
With a loud scoff from the demon on the right, you look over at them. Eyebrows knitted together, while angelic eyes stare back with wide irritation.
“What?” You snap quietly, cocking your head to the side.
Unfortunately, there is no fight to erupt. All it takes is one flick of his hand and the two demons are forced to leave. Feet dragging across the ground. They whines and cries for him to forgive them following them out of the door.
Deep breaths sound from your lungs as you watch the scene unfold and end as quick as it was put on. A clawed hand wrapping around your chin delicately to make you look up at the demon next to you.
“My pretty little darling bird.” He mutters, dipping his head down to meet your lips. Taking away your breath again and pushing you into the counter.
“I am yours.”
A whisper full of such love. Back in the day, you would have believed fully demonic descent would be incapable of displaying such emotion. Let alone feel it.
Yet you realised it was very much not what you had thought when you first met this charming man during your fall.
“And you are mine.” He groans against your lips, pulling you close by your collar with the claw of his index. Tearing away at the fabric of your shirt.
You let out a small squeak at the sting that meets the feathers behind your ears as he bites down. Hands roaming possessively.
“Now.” He tuts, pulling away and gazing back at you with half-lidded eyes.
“Get back to work hm? We have a busy day ahead of us.” The sight of your wings drooping slightly left the already boiling cauldron from within his heart spilling over completely. Such a beautiful sight to admire. The frown on your lips and the desperation in your eyes growing.
“And please wake Alessio up too, baobei.”
#﹙ cupcake rush. ﹚: jingyi versless 𖹭 ݁#monster boyfriend#teratophillia#monster fucker#monster x reader#alchemist x reader#necromancer x reader#monster oc#oc x reader#original character x reader#x reader#reader insert#jingyi verseless#asterism#demon x reader
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James stood in the dimly lit cabin, fists clenched at his sides, trying desperately to keep his composure. Every fiber of his being screamed with humiliation—he, Commodore James Norrington, reduced to this. His gaze burned holes into the floor, refusing to meet Killian’s eyes, because if he did… well, he feared what might break inside him. The shame of being at the mercy of pirates—no, of this pirate—was almost too much to bear.
Yet the soft, broken apology that fell from Killian’s lips cut through James like a knife. The raw, almost childlike regret in the pirate’s voice was a sound he hadn't expected to hear, not here, not now. His teeth ground together, jaw tight, as he slowly lifted his head to finally meet Killian’s gaze. Seeing the guilt swimming in those blue eyes he once knew so well—a younger, more innocent version of the man before him—only made his fury flare brighter.
“Yes,” James hissed, his voice like ice. “I would have preferred that. I would have mourned you, yes, but at least I could have honored the man you were. The naval officer who once fought with honor, who had a chance at a respectable life. Instead, I stand here, looking at a wretched pirate who preys upon his own kind.” He spat the words, hoping to wound, to lash out, anything to regain some semblance of power in this crushingly humiliating moment.
But then, that satisfaction withered as he took in the slump of the other man’s shoulders, the way his eyes refused to meet his. And damn him, damn him—Killian Jones had grown into an infuriatingly handsome rogue over the years, the sort of man whose charm and intensity made people follow him, whether they were pirates or otherwise. The same dark, tousled hair, that sharp, chiseled jaw, but now there was an edge to him—a dangerous, magnetic aura that made James’s stomach churn for reasons he wished he could deny.
God, what a wretched fool he was, even now, to find some twisted flicker of attraction to this treacherous man. Just like with that blasted Jack Sparrow, whose infuriating grin and boundless swagger had also stirred something in James he refused to acknowledge. But this—this was far worse. Because this was Killian, the man he had once respected, admired, even… perhaps cared for more than he ever admitted.
James swallowed hard, trying to douse those thoughts with the cold water of anger. “So, this is your grand mercy, then?” he said bitterly, his voice low and tense. “Looting my ship, branding my men as captives, then towing us to port like some charitable rogue? How noble of you, Captain Hook.” He practically spat the name.
But beneath his biting tone, there was a flicker of something else. The reluctant gratitude that Killian’s words stirred—offering aid, sparing his men. It was so unlike what he expected from a pirate. James’s heart twisted painfully, hating that he had to rely on the mercy of a man who should have been an enemy.
In the quiet that followed, James found himself softening, if only slightly, against his will. “Do what you will, Captain, this is .. my fault regardless” he said, the fight drained from his voice, leaving behind only a hollow weakness. "I-- I am.. at your mercy. "
He could feel the shame of the man he once held in such high regards. Killian still did, even in these years as a pirate he often thought back on James and hoped that he had succeeded and living a good life. It seems he had, having gotten to a high ranking but now it seemed he had fucked that all up with this random encounter. He kept his smug look on the way into the cabin where they could talk privately, but as soon as the door closed that all dropped.
Killian's shoulders slumped and he stared at the commodore with crushing guilt. He hated the british royal navy, he hated the king and all of the men that wanted Liam and him to fail, but he didn't hate James. Now he's hurt the man he once looked up to, humiliated him and essentially destroyed his reputation. He felt so awful that it looked like he might shed some tears. Something that hasn't changed, Killian had always been emotionally driven.
"I'm so sorry James." He said softly, his voice cracking a bit. "I hoped that we'd never meet like this. I'm sure you wish I had actually died in that voyage then standing here now as a pirate..." Killian took a deep breath trying to compose himself, looking anywhere other than the man before him. "We'll just take what we need, tow your ship to the closest port to get some help so you aren't stranded out here in the middle of the ocean."
Killian wouldn't loot them then leave them dead in the water to starve to death. This was an exception he was willing to make for James and his men. "Heh. This'll mark Jolly as a pirate ship and you now know who Captain Hook really is. Not leaving witnesses I've managed to stay under the radar in most ports as a trader ship." He leaned back against the closest wall and sighed. This was bound to happen, running into someone he previously known. Why'd it have to be James of all people?
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FUCKIN GODDAMN FUCKVLHXTKSTSIRSRJSDIFYFCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY HOT WOMEN FROM 🏳️⚧️ AND WHY TF CAN'T I BE ONE?!?!??
Life is truly neverending agony... But at least there's women 🤷🏻♀️ fair trade I suppose
#mika-talks#i am both desperately smitten by trans/enby folks in general#and also wishing desperately to have that power#not because I intend to use it - but because I wanna feel like I see a gorgeous emo chick when I look in the mirror#but Christ on a cracker does my body hate estrogen#transgender#transfem#trans girl#enby#lgbtqia
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So this:
Leads to this:
Which leads to this:
Which allows vecna to do this:
Right? Right………. So then this:
Leads to this:
Which leads to:
???????????????? 👀👀👀👀👀
Will has had powers.
#will has powers#no - he had powers. he probably displayed them when he got taken in to the upside down. and vecna wanted those powers. so he took them.#this also opens up to the possibility he could get them back somehow. with el it was through memories of her mom when she was born. love.#when she relived her younger self opening the gate for the first time through the power of love#so Will could get his back through strong feelings of love. just saying.#stranger things predictions#stranger things theories#byler#byler tumblr#so the cool kids can find this 😌#I HAVE ANOTHER THING TO SAY!!! Els powers are strong from negative emotions - hatred. anger. vengeance.#but they’re even more powerful from feelings of love - familial and platonic love (mama. hopper. max. etc)#so if Will did show his powers to vecna (accidentally) when he got taken then those would have been from his most common negative emotion#fear#El is anger. hatred. will is fear. anxiety.#so will will get his powers to their fullest strength only with Love. romantic love. feeling wanted. useful.#familial/friend love was something El needed in her life and she against all odds managed to find it#she got the love she desperately needed and deserved (not romantic like the Melvin’s seem to think)#will has all that in buckets. he has friends who love him. the best mom and brother anyone could wish for. but he feels unworthy of love.#feels like all the bad things that happened to him were deserved. so him receiving and accepting what he desperately needs and deserves#will fully unlock his powers - if he has them.#thank you for coming to my Ted talk
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it also once again makes me painfully aware of the woes of being a dragon age dwarf enjoyer (<- being starved for proper lore) 😔
#cant believe they will just say yeah they have all these very strict rules and structures that dictates pretty much all life in orzammar#(and even outside of orzammar!)#and then didnt even think through how that would affect society and life and everything let alone give us more info on it#lay rambles#literally even the 'children take on the caste of their same sex parent' which comparatively comes up very early and very frequently#and is a pretty damn significant part of how orzammar is structured!#is very obviously not thought through#because that would have a huge impact on the balance of sexes in different houses and on caste and family relations#among other things#or how orzammar is desperate for children and yet if a child is born casteless the casteless status is still more important#the combination of how important social standing is but also they cant let casteless die out because they are integral to how orzammar func#*functions#in general the role of the casteless is so juicy and interesting honestly#or say. how does a society that puts so much value in reproduction treat those who cannot reproduce#and how does all of that affect gender#is there a separate role/gender/whatever for people who cant have children?#would they be ostracised because of it or maybe even held in high regard bc they are the ones who can do The Dangerous Jobs#like joining the forces who protect the thaig against darkspawn or mine lyrium without having to risk loss of fertility?#(but would then ofc be *expected* to take on those jobs)#would it make women be held in higher regard and men more expendable?#imagine if houses had matriarchs who have a lot of social influence and power regardless of their actual rank within the house#because they successfully produced and raised a lot of children#but yeah idk i'm just rambling now lol#dragon age dwarves are cool i wish bioware wouldn't forget them all the time. is what i'm saying
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just going about my day idly contemplating how some of the ways hawke can interact with a romanced anders are not at all unlike how they interact with leandra (and a bit of carver too, especially with a purple hawke), and then thought about my hawke in the timeline where he romances anders and was hit straight in the face with 'was he ever actually in love, or was he just desperately trying to renegotiate with his mother's ghost in any way he could' and now i need to lie down. this is the power of dragon age 2
#'you don't know my mother' haunting me through the years#dragon age#dragon age 2#hawke#On second thought let's not go to Kirkwall; it is a silly place#there are of course as many ways to do/read that relationship as there are players to interact with it haha and all valid!#but my personal version of handers is sooo fucked up and bad times for everyone involved and I love it haha.#this is a relationship neither of them should have been in and that made everything worse and everyone unhappy in the end#locked tomb levels of the horrors of love. i ship it but in the way that I want to make it sadder and more gutwrenching each time#to be clear this is a very mutual two-way kind of fucked up but I think varric in his loyalty and love would downplay hawke's side of it#for huge swathes of their relationship anders is not in a mental place to be a good partner and the emotional blackmail is Not Okay#(but it's just like how mother used to make it! hawke's soul cries sadly as it reaches for it hungrily)#which is in some ways fair enough no one could accuse him of not warning you ahead of time fjskda#but hawke is messy about it in a way only available to a covert people pleaser who has never had a millisecond of therapy#with some added stuff that my hawke is always acespec in some form and when he gets together with anders...#is the sex something he doesn't particularly care to have or not have but it 'makes anders happy'/he longs to feel wanted *and* needed#and also a way he gets out of ever being *actually* vulnerable (which I think he'd had to be with varric for example if he Went There )#'you want the hawke who's in your head so badly and I kind of wish I were that hawke too. so let's be collaborateurs with that fantasy'#(and then maybe if I do it right every time you'll finally be happy hawke says in his heart looking at this leandra-anders phantom form)#(and echoing stuff in varric's relationship to hawke but I think the important distinction there is that varric -- is a craftsman haha#he KNOWS when he's lying/making up a story he KNOWS the difference between what is and what he wishes the world was#(I think there's some deep longing there to not know; for it to blend together or have the power to change things. but he always knows)#which ironically leaves him in a better position to actually see and understand hawke the person#even as he is creating hawke the literary figure. almost to protect him in some ways? god da2 is so full of STUFF!!! I adore it)#and of course anders gets so disillusioned with hawke's inertia and lack of action (you all but married this man anders!#you should know this about him he's already carrying the whole family and city on his shoulders if you add a gram more he'll collapse!)#and hawke feels so desperately hurt that the promise anders seemed to make that he'd be enough -- that he could fix things for him --#('I'm the one bright light in kirkwall and that apparently doesn't count for shit so I'm just slowly turning to ash for you')#turned out to be untrue. anyway. sad now. imagine them meeting like twenty years on what the fuck could you even say to each other then#(I can't imagine Hawke ever physically hurting anyone he loves so he just tells Anders to leave at the end of DA2. they COULD meet again
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uuuuuhhh no reason just wanna see the robot get preggers because nobody is really taking advantage of the narrative consequences of the robots of ULTRAKILL having fleshy bits inside them (in my humble opinion hahahaha...hahaha....hah....). Anywhosen also a sucker for general Bad End especially when it involves a psycho-sexual (breeding) binding to a greater entity but also I wanna see the murder-robot get knocked up. And the galaxy brain bit of this is instead of calming down they just get Worse.
YEAH NO ONE REALLY TAKES ADVANTAGE OF THAT. and well i mostly assumed a very small percentage of people actually want to breed the robots like that which is why.
also i don't think this as a bad end, but a bad path that can lead to some other.. inch resting things (my stupid ass is trying to craft a plot with horror and drama from this path and how it'd change the story slightly despite knowing I will never get around to writing it in fic form except tiny excerpt ideas and art)
also i have so much to say abt the 'it doesn't calm down it just gets worse' bc its So true
#kicking my legs. it sooo genuinely gets worse i think it believes its actually in “love” with hell. and maybe it is.#gets worse and loses itself more and more. abandon any last trace of identity that had never been regarded anyway by anyone#its easy to let something guide you and instruct you in nearly everything if it feels too painfully good? and why spend more power thinking#altho for the. plot i was conducting in my head it was msotly involving gabriel and the primes bc of an idea my friend gave me which was#that if this occurred before v1 reached the prime sanctums it could have been guided or instructed to go to the sanctums but at the time#it does its currently carrying a child and because of that both the primes and v1 itself are spared because. i dont know if i think#the kings would fight a pregnant person . i at least think sisyphus Wouldnt because wheres the fun in an opponent who appears to already#be disadvantaged. (even if it can fare just fine.)#if any friendships were able to be made (cough . i like sisyphus qnd v1 platonic and romantic) itd be kind of. sad from an outside perspect#ve to watch it deteriorate into being less of its own entity and becoming slowly just another extension of hell. even in fighting it shows.#i wish i could explain it all better#and sorry if this ask is late to be answered i was writing my rwsponse at a con LMAOOO#.txt#ask#i want to write i have no timeee no energyyy but hear me out there is potential for crazy wackjob shit#ive decided also not to kill gabriel i think i should do somethign fucked up with him and his inexperience in relationshios#i forgot who suggested he should get so desperate that he begs for hell to take him as well. (which i cant decide if it would or wouldnt bc#its kind of really funny and mean if it#says no)
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Another terukaneaoi au because I'm slowly going insane over them.
Aoi gets bored one night and being the 'supernatural' enthusiast she is, decides to summon a demon, just for fun cause she doesn't believe she'll actually summon one. But the thing is that she does.
Teru, a very powerful demon that gets summoned every once in a blue moon for a wish gets summoned by this innocent adorable sixteen year old that doesn't look much younger than him if it wasn't the fact he wasn't human. He asks what her wish is and of course she was clueless and decided after a whole day, that Teru was interesting to her and she wished for him to stay with her (of course Teru can't deny her wish when she uses those pleading eyes no matter how hard he tries).
And the same exact night, he finds a small little angel, in its cookie sized form that was meant to disguise and protect it, Akane. The angel had been looking after Aoi (stalking) for about a year now. (He saw her and just had to stay with her; he didn't know what he was feeling but he decided to leave heaven's gates to be wherever she went).
They fight and Teru thinks he's cute in his little form and all, he decides to keep him for Aoi. So, the next morning Aoi questions why Teru is holding a small little angel that is very much alive (and very angry as well as chatty) and not a stuffed toy. Akane is automatically drawn by Aoi, going over to her, basking in her presence. Aoi decides he's adorable and to keep him, she gives him a lot of attention and even Teru complains that the small little angel gets more love than him. (Just imagine Teru pouting as he complains).
At first, for a week, Teru just hides in the closet while Aoi is at school, always happily greeting her when she gets home while Akane gets to come with her since he's tiny and normal humans can't see him.
Only for a week, until Teru wouldn't stop complaining so Akane (albeit for the first time) got so annoyed he went into his normal form, and pulled some special amulets from his robes pockets (Teru knew that special amulets can make angels and demons make you seem human but they were very rare and rarely even accessible, he doesn't understand how Akane easily had so many).
#now teru can come to school with aoi now#he was very happy#also teru never really enrolled he just fooled the school into thinking he was already always there since hes powerful and powers center#around fooling others since he grants wishes of the desperate#also akane is very powerful as well although him and teru have the same power level akane just makes better use of his#aoi just thinks there silly and adorable#teru and akane just fight all the time#teru finds it cute because akane is almost always in his smaller angel form#there just all adorable in here#tbhk#jshk#aoi akane#teru minamoto#aidairo#akane aoi#terukane#aoikane#terukaneaoi
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VAMP ROGER AU QUESTION! how would he and barnabas interact together (if they ever interact)? :3 💜
tagging @tortoisesshells because she's my co-conspirator <3
excellent question! this family and their sharp-toothed men will be the death of ... well, several community members of Collinsport, i suppose.
to start — Barnabas gets out of the box slightly differently than in canon, which colors his relationship to Roger and the rest of the household. Roger kills Willie after his attempted assault on Carolyn and Vicki (who is, by that point, his wife); Willie's mysterious disappearance and Roger's suspected involvement makes Jason that much more panicked, desperate, and correspondingly aggressive. Liz goes searching for the lost family jewels in a last-ditch attempt to buy Jason off, and, inadvertently, lets their ancient family sin out of the tomb.
ergo she's made Barnabas' thrall instead of Willie, but this goes unnoticed for a while — even though her brother would, in theory, recognize the signs, and his suspicions are raised, but she's already acting so much unlike herself with Jason around that he doesn't suspect anyone else of doing her harm. yet.
at the start, he and Barnabas get along very well, even before they discover their shared affliction: they're both relatively sophisticated, well-traveled, intelligent people, and for all that Roger decries Liz's emphasis on the Collins name, he leans towards familial connections instinctively (Roger hasn't got much in the way of friends outside of the house even in canon, and he's even more isolated as a vampire).
after he finds out Barnabas is also a vampire, things get a little more complicated, but overall, they're still friendly. Roger doesn't have much sympathy for Barnabas' relentless self-pity and decrying his doomed fate to live as a monster, because Roger on the whole enjoys his vampirism and has made a decent un-life for himself out of it (thanks in no small part to Vicki). but having someone like him around is a comfort in ways he wouldn't have expected, he's no longer solitary or uniquely monstrous out of the Collins family, he has someone else around through the night, and someone who understands the sufferings of bloodthirst and being shut out of the sun.
furthermore, Roger's very much interested in his family history and stories of the past, the building of Collinwood, Jeremiah's ships – and Barnabas was there. there's potential for some very interesting conversations about the past, and the arc of the Collins family history to the present, not to mention literature, travel, fashion, politics and the rest. Roger's his cousin's mirror in modernity in many ways, and that's something potentially interesting to explore: the world changes around them, but Collinses do not.
as an aside, they both have a funny sort of relationship to Burke. Barnabas hates him for his resemblance to Jeremiah and envies his friendship with Vicki and thinks he's crude, and Roger ... well. it's complicated. it's closer to antagonism than not, and Burke has tried to kill him once in this au, and Roger resents his flirting with Vicki, but then there's everything else with their past. so I don't think Barnabas' treatment of him would sit particularly well with Roger, he'd take the attitude of hey, only I can be a dick to Burke >:(
the definite fracture point is Barnabas imprinting on Vicki. Roger's already jealous and possessive by nature, and it's amplified by the supernatural nature of his relationship to Vicki (being closer, bodily and mentally; being necessary to each other; being, quite literally, sustenance) so he's already a little on edge when Barnabas starts paying attention to her, giving her presents, and appreciating the scenery — Barnabas doesn't, exactly, tend to have much in the way of moral inclination to leaving women alone when they have prior engagements, but it's fair to point out the irony of everything Roger was doing with his bloodbag governess when he was still very much a married man.
anyway: Roger finds foreign bite marks on his wife's neck, and he's understandably immensely upset by this. partially out of territorial sentiment, but he also knows Vicki, and he knows that she wouldn't have invited another vampire willingly — which means that she was forced, or hypnotized, or attacked in secret, and there's only the one potential suspect. this is already enough to lose his good will, but he might have been willing to let Barnabas go with a "hands off," had this discovery not lead to finding out what he'd also been doing to Liz. the combination of the two is unforgivable, and it's Barnabas' error to have made an enemy who is very personally aware of all his vampiric weaknesses, and Burke's already carved a stake.
#THANK YOUUUU for the question :D i love talking about this au kskfgd#devilagent#vamp roger au tbt#➤ answered. ┊ Collinsport 4099.#i do think the barnabas and roger relationship is an interesting one even though there's not much going on there in canon.#(canonically speaking roger is just sort of... there? even during cassandra he doesn't ever pity him for being a victim in the scheme;#it's grrr angelique is here messing with *Me* again. who cares about my oblivious dumb blonde cousin)#but there's a lot of parallels going on there which I never shut up about: the way that roger will drain life from a man#to preserve his own; or manipulate and throw others (vicki) under the bus;#or makes david (not biologically in human reproduction) into a monster just like him — forming him and burke in his image.#roger is Modern in ways that barnabas is not — the sports cars; the en vogue suits and turtlenecks; his flippant relationship with his vows#and his (relatively speaking) more-or-less open queerness.#but he's also a creature out of the past; an antiquated speaking pattern; an embrace of old family stories (particularly tragedies);#not to mention he plays the role of a byronic hero practically straight out of the novel just without any sideburns.#roger simultaneously wishes to be free of that family root system; but falls back on it in desperation because it's only because his#ancestry and family wealth and power exists that *he* exists at all.#and in the same way that joshua cannot shoot barnabas for becoming a monster; neither can liz condemn her brother for his manslaughter#(or david for patricide)#but even though they don't die; they are exiled — to the tomb; to augusta — and return as mere shadowed and monstrous versions#of their former selves.#many of the differences between vamp roger and barnabas I think can be partially explained by: roger did not have the 150 year gap between#being turned and coming back; he returns to essentially the same world he knew just ten years ago#and; two; that roger has his great yearning love *after* he's turned; and not before.#there's nothing about his life with laura and david that he particularly mourns or wishes to recreate.#and; as already noted; roger has vicki — who serves as necromancer;#which... I suppose parallels julia; in an odd way.
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Cap marvel headcanons I Will integrate into a fic one day but also have Zero basis in canon to my knowledge (this ended up being LONG):
The living lightning is an ancient force akin to the speed force, and the 'true' guardian of magic, being possibly the first 'magical creature' ever created.
The rock of eternity only recently became based on earth, in the past several thousand years, with the planet's deities acting as mountains in the rain cycle - funnels to safely channel the magic back into the Champion. It's a fully symbiotic relationship that benefits the planet and its people immensely.
This means previously the rock has been based on alien planets. Previous champions are ancient aliens, many from species that no longer exist, either because the species died out or evolved into something unrecognisable.
The champion of magic may have inspired the oua (?), the creators and high council of the green lanterns. Ooh maybe an oua was selected as champion, which is how they learned of it!
The living lightning, when not in a mortal vessel, rests in the heart of the Rock in a large brazier, with a smoke lid of white edged with gold in a familiar pattern. It is tradition, or perhaps instinct, for a Champion to light the brazier whenever they visit the Rock. It will be lit for as long as the visit lasts, and be extinguished the next time they come.
Should it choose to take form, the living lightning resembles a washed out combination of each of its previous Champions. Its form is solid and clear, strong and made for battle, but distinctly uncanny. It doesn't leave its brazier, nor speak.
The 'ideal form' of a hero varies all the time, doesn't it? Especially if you're a kid still growing and learning about yourself and the world. Headcanon cap ever so subtly changes features sometimes. Gradually. Height and build changes sometimes. One of the league members has noticed but they really can't prove it to themselves and it's driving them crazy. Billy has no idea.
On that topic, the 'ideal form' also includes the clothes, right? The red costume? If Billy transforms with the intent of doing something outside his normal hero things (ie, attending a celebration), the outfit has every reason and ability to change to reflect that! Everyone expecting cap to show up in his normal gear and ready to throw a formal suit at him to wiggle on over his costume and he shows up in a red and gold set with a little one shoulder cape like 'yeah I have no idea either'.
Cap marvel Is An Adult. Billy isn't, but cap is in every single way that someone could count. This is probably canon but in some fics I think the jl forgets lol. It's still the same soul, just, with an adult filter instead of a kid one. However that filter manifests.
Not sure this is canon too, but the idea of the mind/soul/whatever of cap manifesting as this great impossible mass. A storm, or a tiger, or a barrier of lightning. This giant, untouchable, dormant mass of power and implied Danger™. Again, Billy has no idea. J'onn is eying warily from a very safe distance.
His wiki practically waxes poetic about his abilities and skills in strategy, mathematics, nigh precognition from ability to spot and manipulate patterns. Captain marvel is unbeatable at chess. Batman has lost to him. Billy cannot do fractions and it drives him up the WALL.
The champion, and ONLY the champion, can share his powers. If shazam wants a second champion he has to give a new set wholesale or convince the champion to share. Similarly, those patroned by the champion cannot transform unless the champion is also transformed. Because otherwise that would be too easy for Billy lol.
Every time Billy asks, tawky gives a different canon origin story. Billy has no idea which is true.
Billy's parents died accidentally freeing Adam on their expedition. Probably crushed by rubble :(. The wizard is the only one who knows and really isn't inclined to share, and Adam either hasn't connected the dots or never really noticed they were there.
Cap and Billy love each other, regardless of whatever version their whole thing is. They're the only reason the other remembers self care and that kind of self love, even if he's not sure he deserves it, makes a world of difference with how they portray themselves to the world.
Cap doesn't need to breathe to speak but he never remembers that and has repeatedly choked in water and space. Superman empathises but tries not to find it funny after the third time it happens.
Billy has showed the wizard memes.
The wizard internally refers to Billy as the 'sassy, lost child'. He has a pointy hat like any good wizard but refuses to wear one since Billy keeps asking him to, pretty please.
Cap once won an arm wrestle with superman by pretending to lick his hand. He didn't. Billy would have.
Cap marvel CANONICALLY bites but after the first time he regulates his jaw strength. Thankfully it was Black Adam so no one lost a hand. He had him in a headlock so who's fault was it really.
Ebenezer doesn't have a strong opinion on cap marvel either way. Billy thinks that's almost worse.
The living lightning isn't lightning. It was around before lightning. It is living, however. It is that 'living' that forms the main consciousness of the Champion form, in this case Marvel. Its not sentient or sapient itself, that's the vessel, but it is the building blocks of it.
In dc (again no idea if this has any basis in canon) magic is the fifth state of matter, above plasma. Yes this interferes incredibly with quantum physics and theoretical science. No the magic users don't know how it works either. No they will not help you they have their own research (into the exact same thing) to do.
If the Rock is obliterated cap marvel will die (along with pretty much everything else but irrelevant). However, if he manages to save the brazier, he will continue on. Magic as a whole deal won't be very happy and aeons of magical knowledge and history and artifacts will be lost, but cap will live and can rebuild from the ashes. The brazier is Heavy but enough super strength can move it if you don't mind bringing a chunk of floor. And the rock is so weakened it's literally falling apart but those are the right circumstances anyway so.
#We should be able to put multiple read mores in posts#I had more headcanons than I thought#If anyone has anything proving/disproving any of these PLEASE let me know :D#I'm still pretty new here and I don't know a lot of the canon material#Wish we could get post checks from others without having to @ them I'm not RUDE#but fr if anyone wants to whip out their reading glasses and comically large Well Actually book of references please do#dc comics#captain marvel#dc captain marvel#billy batson#shazam#headcanon#long post#I REPEAT LONG POST#also blanket permission for anyone to use these if they give you Ideas#I really want to write a fic where the jl (mainly superbat) help cap with saving the Rock and fail#But at the last second he swaps to desperately trying to rescue the brazier but his powers failing and he can't move it he's in tears#And superman has to haul it out while someone else carries an inconsolable cap#And when they get outside to safety they're like 'so what's the deal with this over literally everything else in there' and poor Billy just#Has had possibly the worst day of his life his powers fading just tries to scrabble into the brazier (he needs help and its uncomfortable#for everyone involved) and curls up like goodNIGHT and pulls his cape over his shoulders which turns to stone and he dissolves#To sleep and recharge and now the jl is stuck with the source of all magic which is big and heavy and has their unconscious teammate in.#And also it can't leave earth so no watchtower to put it! Very angst hurt comfort identity reveal methinks. HEA ofc#So.... Yeah
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it is unfortunate when i go to prayer and cry my eyes out and the only response i really hear is that i simply have to bear it. like usually i can get my emotions out and once they’re settled i hear a rational solution but it sucks when i don’t get the answer i want. i just have to keep waiting. like normally i hear something that gives me strength but wow apparently i’ve hit a new low
#literally all my problems would be so much easier to deal with if i had friends#and normally i’d be told ‘do this and you’ll probably find friends’#my plan has always been just to wait for someone to find me bc i’m horribly shy and antisocial#even though logically i know that’s a bad way of going about it#my logical rational analytical brain has always been obsessed with finding concrete answers. it’s always been ‘what can *I* do’#so even when i suffer there’s a part of me that says ‘it’s ok once i’m done crying i can work this out and go right back to trying’#i’ve been emotionally dead for years but i’ve always held onto faith like that#tonight i feel like i’ve been brought low. i feel like i’ve finally been told that i might just have to wait after all#which i might think would be comforting bc it absolves me of responsibility#but it’s actually crushing bc it absolves me of power#i feel like i’m finally facing the realization that i’m powerless and pathetic and i’m never going to be able to fix myself#that i can try as hard as i want but i can’t shake off this cross#but i don’t know how long i have to wait for someone to find me#and even if they find me how do i not fumble it#my first instinct is to push people away bc i assume they’re not really interested they’re just trying to be nice#which is usually true#i don’t even know how to sustain casual friendships and im so desperately in need of deep ones#i can’t open up to someone without just breaking apart and making it clear how pathetic i am#one would think i ought to find someone better than myself who can fix me#but on the other hand i think the only time that the good parts of me come out is when im facing someone even worse than me#like i have a tendency to morph into the opposite of the other person in any given situation to maintain healthy balance#so like when surrounded by extroverts which is almost always i become an introvert#it’s rare to meet an introvert but then i become stronger and more extroverted around them. like something in me just loves helping others#even though i can’t help myself#what do i pray for? a fellow pathetic person? or someone with the patience and kindness and life knowledge of a saint?#will either of them really be found just by chance in my life?#and even if i do meet someone. truly i wish they’d also be lonely. i want them to need me#i don’t want to be a pity charity case. like a side project for someone with real friends already
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Oh my Godddddddd, another day, another confirmation that, in terms of parent quality in terms of my young relative it goes:
Me
our cat (look, she thinks she's responsible for us, and she does a good job!)
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the other potential parental figures, including their actual biological parents and their legal guardian
Just...fucking absolute ghouls. Levels of selfishness that go beyond comprehension. Sickening cruelty. I want to tar and feather them. Jesus Christ.
#Turtle with knife.jpg#C'est moi#They like... fucking badgered them into revealing something traumatic and then wouldn't stop talking about it even though it was triggering#And also uhhhhh fucking track them sometimes#And I desperately wish my relative would just stop seeing them but I obviously respect my relative's autonomy and they do still love them#But MORE than that they are extremely freaked out by any anger or displeasure so they literally cannot say no without having panic attacks#And these freaks who call themselves parents are all freakishly possessive - literally like they're a possession - and instead#of being grateful that I've tried to protect my relative the parents keep getting angry at me and AT MY RELATIVE for letting me protect them#They would literally rather my relative had no protection in fucking horrific situations than have help from anyone except them#I can't comprehend the selfishness and cruelty#The stuff that this kid has gone through the stuff they were badgered into revealing they've gone through 🙃 and their parent still going on#to say that they shouldn't let me protect them or help them or support them#I'm literally the only one who doesn't see this kid as a possession and the mere subject of a power struggle#Which makes them all furious at me and accuse me of trying to steal 'em 🙃#Well I'm not the onnnnly one - the cat is good too; she doesn't see them as a possession she sees them as a very large kitten#Yeah#Sigh
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#desperately trying to create interest in the assignment i'm doing because i've had not one not two but three extensions for it#and somehow i'm still struggling to write#i'm normally better at powering through within a few days of the due date but i just#can't.#i suppose it's to be expected given cognitive decline with my condition and given this is my first assignment since i got worse#in addition it's a difficult assignment#but it still feels. bad.#the thing is is that i *like* stuff like this! i like having to use my brain for assignments. i chose the option to make myself think hard#rather than an academic essay#i now wish i'd just picked the essay#especially since i also had a topic i was interested in#urgh#suffering brought about entirely by myself and i'm sitting typing this not my assignment! what the fuck!
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anw i'll stand by it until the day i die that it should've been orihime who beat ulquiorra in the end and not ichigo
#bleach#orihime inoue#ok so hear me out. the shun shun rikka is confirmed to have ridiculously powerful abilities especially the healing ability which has been-#-said to 'trespass into God's territory'. the offensive ability is curbed by orihime's own intentions though right? and since she's more-#-of a pacifist character she doesn't usually fight often. however. however. one of the few (and first) times we see her actively ready to-#-fight someone is chapter 42 when tatsuki is injured and getting mind controlled. like. im just saying. we couldve had chapter parallels#and like i reallly reallly wish we had been able to see the full extent of orihime's offensive ability too like. the way the scene couldve-#-played out is so clear in my mind. though tbh its been months since i read that arc so like. maybe this idea 'goes against the themes' or-#-whatever. and like this doesnt even have to change her character like genuinely have her take down ulquiorra out of like. desperation and-#-then have her grapple with the enormity of her power and once again chose kindness instead of violences like she has before#anw i have more notes/better plotting out scene in my notes app if anyone wants to see....also fuck you again tite kubo for this<3#jfc i havent done a tag rant like this in a while
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me like four days ago to an old friend who msged me to reconnect: "yeah no i think things are settling down maybe after this last month of actual hell"
today: mother's medical situation has been handed a kablooey and the next few months are going to be Even Harder
#she is getting a biopsy tomorrow. and um. medications are being fucked with to drastic degrees#and we're going to have to wait several months for surgery when she was supposed to originally get it next month#fucking hell i am so incredibly stressed fjjfkdl i dont want this to be happening at all#i am the caregiver who is in charge of making sure she's conscious and okay at all times when dad's not available#i.e. he is at work or sleeping (shift worker)#and then bc of this im also on 911 calling duty if she ever does have smth happen#which isnt entirely out of the question. augh.#its uhm. a rly fucked thing to have to be the caregiver for ur abuser. im not doing very well tbh fjdkdl#this is also why hiatus is happening rn dhdksl things are so incredibly nightmarish rn#idk how im doing as well as i am <- is incredibly out of touch w reality and dissociating to dangerous degrees#idk!! i am frightened and exhausted and i just am begging whatever higher power may exist to let this be over one way or another honestly#get me out or get me gone or do smth to another of the chess pieces in this game so it can all finally stop#i need to go do 1k more words before bed tonight if i want to keep on track w november writign month#but i also desperately am needing to do my nightly drawing+decompressing fbfjdkdl so idk what to do its already 9pm augh augh#luckily i have dbt tomorrow so i will get to See real live ppl again tomorrow#its been a week since i talked to or have seen anyone outside of family face to face fbkfdl#god i am so fucked fjkfdl this is so so so bad and i cannot do anything abt any of it#i rly fucking wish dbt was helpful for ongoing situations but it seems like its only for short term bad times fjfjdldl#im so gjfkdld this is so fucked and i am aaaaaaaaa#pippen needs 2nd breakfast#vent tw
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