#and also how alphabets were invented

[gothneighbor]

Doing the course eval for the basics class: yeah it was fine. The physical projects kinda sucked. (Forgets to mention how making videos also sucked)

Doing the course eval for the history class: FUCKING LOVED IT. NO NOTES. 1000/10 CANT WAIT FOR NEXT SEMESTER IM FOAMING AT THE MOUTH

[heart-of-the-morningstar]

✨Lucifer Morningstar NSFW Alphabet✨

Hey hey! Soooooo I saw some people doing the NSFW Alphabet for some of the Hazbin cast so I thought I would toss my hat in the ring! And of course I'll be doing it for the LOML Luci 💖

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

You already know, the King of Hell is the King of aftercare! Your sessions can go on for a while, so more often than not, you're absolutely spent. Luckily, Lucifer is at your beck and call. He'll give you whatever you need; cuddles, a bubble bath, a massage, a snack, and water of course! You're his Queen, after all, he'll sure as hell treat you like one!

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

I think Lucifer's favorite body parts are his hands. Not for the way they look, but for what they can do. He loves that his hands can roam every inch of your body, make you moan and whimper, make you scream his name, mark you. The fact that they can bring you so much pleasure makes him giddy! It's almost impossible for Lucifer to choose his favorite thing about you because he loves every bit of you! But if you pressed him about it, he would have 2 answers. The first is your lips, because the man is obsessed with kissing you! He'd do it all day if he could! Plus you have the most infectious smile, it warms his heart every time he sees it. The second are your thighs. Look me in the eye and tell me Lucifer is not a thigh man, you can't, it's impossible! Your lap is his favorite place to sit and to rest his head. Of course he LOVES plantings little kisses and hickies on your inner thighs when he's about to eat his favorite meal ;)

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

This goes without saying, Lucifer could survive on your cum alone if he was so lucky. Man is pussy drunk! He'll coax so many orgasms out of you just so he can get his fill of your juices. It's basically a drug to him. And of course he has no problem tasting his own once he's filled you up, definitely a different taste but one he enjoys nonetheless!

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

It's embarrassing for him, but Lucifer was smitten with you since he first laid eyes on you! He couldn't help but imagine all the things he would do to you and have you to do him if you ever gave him the chance. He mentally smacked himself for seeing you that way in the beginning, but GOD you were just an absolute angel! The amount of times this man jacked off to the thought of you before you were even together is way more than he'll ever admit to. If you accidentally bumped into him or touched his shoulder, rest assured that man was cumming into his hand that night because of it.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Lucifer is legitimately older than dirt, and had a wife for 10,000 years, he knows EXACTLY what he's doing! He makes it his personal mission to have you cum multiple times every session! Man invented eating pussy for Christ's sake!

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Old school as hell (literally lol), Lucifer loves missionary with you, but it's never boring! Every session with him is intimate and full of passion. He LOVES looking at when when he thrusts into you over and over, the facial expressions and noises you make when he makes love to you makes his heart melt! That being said, he loves any position where he can see your beautiful face, so PLEASE climb on top and ride that man into the next afterlife!

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Lucifer is the goofiest man to ever goof! I'd like to think once you two are super comfortable with each other, initiating sex becomes sillier. He would use old timey phrases like "hanky panky" or "horizontal mambo", but most of the time he would say something along the lines of "how's about you and me partake in a little bow- chicka-bow-wow :)"

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He has blond hair so his pubes are no different! Lucifer is very well kept and tidy in that area, the minimal hair he has down there stands out a little bit do to his pale white skin, but it's always perfectly trimmed!

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Intimacy master, let me tell ya! Lucifer has such a bleeding heart and is a hopeless romantic for sure! He only says the sweetest things to you when you make love. He hardly uses the term "fuck" as he thinks it's a bit too harsh considering how deeply passionate your sessions are. His praises are endless for you; "you're so beautiful", "you look like an angel", "you feel so good"

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

I touched on this earlier, but his masturbation sessions definitely lessened when you two started being intimate. Before that, Lucifer would probably masturbate to you AT LEAST once a day before you were a couple. When he started courting you, it got even worse because God forbid he initiate anything with you out of fear of scaring you away! But once you initiated, oh he was putty in your hands! After that, Lucifer gains a lot more self control, but he can't help but jack off to you every once in a while, but he'd much rather it be your hand~

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

PRAISE KINK PRAISE KINK PRAISE KINK!! Did I say praise kink?? Please praise this man when you're with him! Lucifer loves to know that he's doing a good job with you. Absolutely melts when you call him a "good boy". He adores hearing things like "You make me feel so good, Luci", "You're doing so well for me, my darling", "Just like that, sweetheart, just like that."

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

His room, of course! His bed is wide enough, for sure! But Lucifer would never restrict himself to just the bedroom. I hope you're ready to defile every flat surface in that mansion of his because he's fucking you in every single room. He has A LOT of rooms~

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

You. You turn him on. Every move you make, every sway of your hips, every laugh you make, Lucifer is GONE. But of course, teasing this man is a sure fire way to get him going. Wearing a short skirt around him and bending over seemingly innocently or placing a kiss on the pulse of his neck, dude is hard as a rock and you're so gonna get it when you two are alone! Good!

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

I feel like there isn't a lot that Lucifer wouldn't try at least once if you asked him to! But a big turn off for him is any mention of his ex-wife Lilith during an intimate session. He'd rather not think about her in that way anymore, he still hasn't fully recovered from her absence.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Oh baby, oh buddy, oh pal...you already know what I'm gonna say here! LUCIFER 👏🏻 IS 👏🏻 THE 👏🏻 KING 👏🏻 OF 👏🏻 CUNNILINGUS!!! This has already been said a million times but I'LL SAY IT AGAIN! He could live off eating your pussy alone!! Man needs his fill AT LEAST once a day, he absolutely WORSHIPS your pussy! He has a forked tongue and he knows PRECISCELY how to use it! Your womanhood will never know peace when you're with Lucifer Morningstar! Your pleasure always comes first pun completely intended but he'd never turn down a blowjob from you! He always gets so red in the face when he watches you suck him off~

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

You can count on one hand the amount of times Lucifer has been rough with you during sex, because it's extremely rare. He treats you like glass for the most part, always wanting to make the moment last as long as possible. He's VERY sensual when it comes to love making. Oh but when he's close to an orgasm, his pace picks up tenfold, almost too fast for you to register the amount of pleasure you're receiving. Almost~

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Quickies are definitely not Lucifer's thing. He views sex as a declaration of love, so to speak, it can't be rushed. However, there have been occasions where your over abundance of teasing caused him to snap and he had to push you onto the nearest surface and take care of you right then and there!

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Considering he's the literal King of Hell, Lucifer can take as many risks as he pleases. Who's going to stop him? Although he doesn't like to push it, he'd rather keep your love making sessions private. But, semi public sex is not out of the question, especially when he wants to pound you on the balcony of his mansion where the entire Pride Ring can hear your moans.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Lucifer's stamina is God-like, literally! He's not bound to the same restrictions as mortals so this man can go for literal hours if you let him! Of course you need a lot more breaks than he does and that's perfectly alright with him! But once you're ready to go again, it's off to the races!

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

You would definitely be the one to bring up toys in the bedroom with Lucifer. At first he might feel insecure because he thinks you need toys to help get you off, but that's the furthest thing from the truth! The first thing you bring up is a strap on, and oh my God, he's beet red. THIS MAN NEEDS TO BE PEGGED, DO YOU HEAR ME?? Pound that ass, he will fall even deeper in love with you than he already is!

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Lucifer isn't much of a tease himself, that's your department! The worst he'll do is squeeze your ass or place his hand a little too high up your thigh for it to be considered casual touching. His go to move if he's in a frisky mood will be to flash his signature V-shaped fingers over his mouth once he knows no one is watching.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Oh let me tell you something, this man is LOUD. Not in terms of actual words, but his sounds! Lucifer cannot help himself, his moans and pleas and whimpers are so fucking cute, you know for sure that you're doing something right when he mewls at the top of his lungs! It's music to your ears, this man is DESPERATE for you!

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

I made this headcanon a little bit ago, but I'm a firm believer that Lucifer is really not a fan of doggy style. He's such a romantic that his desire to see your face when you have sex is EXTREMELY strong. Sure you have a great ass that's fun to smack and grab at, but nothing compares looking into your eyes as you both cum.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Oh you know Lucifer is packing! He's not hung like a horse, but he's definitely larger than average, I would probably say around 7.5 -8 inches. Uncut. I will not explain further lol. His dick is slightly on the skinnier side in terms of girth but he knows exactly how to use it to make you scream~

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

When it comes to you, Lucifer's sex drive is through the roof! Sex marathons are not an uncommon practice between the two of you, a few had gone on for days at a time! If he could spent the rest of eternity inside of you, it would not be long enough for him.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Lucifer usually falls asleep after you, not just because he has stamina of heavenly proportions, but because he wants to make sure you're taken care of. You tend to crash pretty fast after a long session and he wants to make sure you're cleaned up before you zonk out. Once he knows you're alright, it's cuddle time baby and you know he uses his wings to cover the both of you when you drift off to sleep together.

[lancermylove]

Random HCs

Fandom: Obey Me

Pairing: No pairing. Featuring DB and Royals.

Warning: None

Prompt: Random HCs for chuckles and giggles.

A/N: For all those who are exhausted, having a bad day, and struggling, I hope this makes you laugh.

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Mammon

Mammon once tried to make a pyramid scheme business involving selling rare pebbles he found in the backyard.

He secretly practices his cool guy poses in front of the mirror every morning.

Mammon has a collection of sunglasses, each pair named after a famous celebrity from the human realm.

He’s convinced that adding “The Great” before his name on all his social media profiles will make him go viral. Asmo has told him many times it won't work, but Mammon is determined.

The brothers catch Mammon often talking to inanimate objects, like convincing his wallet to magically refill itself. Asmo even has a few videos of these conversations on his phone. If you want to see it, Asmo is taking a payment of cheek kisses for each video.

Mammon once got stuck in a vending machine while trying to get a snack that got jammed. It turned out the vending machine was a mimic. His brothers still tease him about it.

Mammon thinks he’s a master chef because he can make instant noodles without burning them.

The second brother invented a new dance move called "The Mammon Shuffle," but it looks suspiciously like him tripping over his own feet.

Barbatos

He has a hidden talent for stand-up comedy but only practices in front of his mirror when he’s sure no one’s watching.

Barbatos has a secret collection of novelty aprons with quirky phrases, which he wears while cooking when no one is around.

Barbatos keeps a detailed journal of all the times he’s had to clean up after Diavolo’s “enthusiastic” projects, complete with the commentaries from the peanut gallery.

He also keeps a list of all the times he had to intervene in the brothers’ schemes. That too by rank of how ridiculous they were.

The butler has a secret talent for juggling, which he practices with kitchen utensils while he waits for dishes to finish cooking.

Barbatos has a habit of organizing the pantry alphabetically, and he gets annoyed when someone messes it up.

He once tried to teach a cooking class to the brothers, but it turned into a comedy show with flying ingredients and accidental fires. Then, Solomon showed up the next day asking for cooking lessons, and Barbatos disappeared into thin air. Now, Solomon is permanently banned from entering the royal kitchen.

For the rest, visit my website: Random HCs

———————————————

➣  Please visit my website for the full masterlist!

[odinsblog]

Funny how SCOTUS “originalists” ignore this history

Benjamin Franklin is revered in history for his fixation on inventing practical ways to make everyday life easier. He was a prolific inventor and author, and spent his life tinkering and writing to share his knowledge with the masses.

One of the more surprising areas Franklin wanted to demystify for the average American? At-home abortions.

Molly Farrell is an associate professor of English at the Ohio State University and studies early American literature. She authored a recent Slate article that suggests Franklin’s role in facilitating at-home abortions all started with a popular British math textbook.

Titled The Instructor and written by George Fisher, which Farrell said was a pseudonym, the textbook was a catch-all manual that included plenty of useful information for the average person. It had the alphabet, basic arithmetic, recipes, and farriery (which is hoof care for horses). At the time, books were very expensive, and a general manual like this one was a practical choice for many families.

Franklin saw the value of this book, and decided to create an updated version for residents of the U.S, telling readers his goal was to make the text “more immediately useful to Americans.” This included updating city names, adding Colonial history, and other minor tweaks.

But as Farrell describes, the most significant change in the book was swapping out a section that included a medical textbook from London, with a Virginia medical handbook from 1734 called Every Man His Own Doctor: The Poor Planter’s Physician.

This medical handbook provided home remedies for a variety of ailments, allowing people to handle their more minor illnesses at home, like a fever or gout. One entry, however, was “for the suppression of the courses”, which Farrell discovered meant a missed menstrual period.

“The book starts to prescribe basically all of the best-known herbal abortifacients and contraceptives that were circulating at the time,” Farrell said. “It's just sort of a greatest hits of what 18th-century herbalists would have given a woman who wanted to end a pregnancy early.”

“It's very explicit, very detailed, also very accurate for the time in terms of what was known ... for how to end a pregnancy pretty early on.”

Including this information in a widely circulated guide for everyday life bears a significance to today’s heated debate over access to abortion and contraception in the United States. In particular, the leaked Supreme Court opinion that would overturn Roe v. Wade and states that “a right to abortion is not deeply rooted in the nation's histories and traditions.”

Farrell said the book was immensely popular, and she did not find any evidence of objections to the inclusion of the section.

“It didn't really bother anybody that a typical instructional manual could include material like this,”she said. “It just wasn't something to be remarked upon. It was just a part of everyday life.”

(continue reading) more ←

[victorie552]

Ok, so Noldolantë, "The Fall of the Noldor" is a lament composed by Maglor about what happened before, during and after First Kinslaying at Alqualondë. It's such a good song that it's played regularly in Aman and Valar listen to it often (I swear, I swear it was in the Silmarillion I just can't find it now).

It's also a more or less common fanon that Maglor continues writing Noldolante through the whole First Age. Makes sense - it's about fall of the Noldor, and Noldor did a lot of falling back then.

Headcannon time: So my first thought was that Noldolante must a long, long, long epic of a song. So it probably has many parts, right? Iliad has 24 books/parts, somehow I think Noldolante would be at least just as long, and there are longer epics. And again, just like Iliad, unless you're a scholar, in the daily life you don't really listen to/read the whole thing, just reread and repeat the most dramatic fragments. What I'm trying to impress upon you all is that the story would have different segments, or chapters, if you will.

And if Maglor continues to write the story during the FA, there would absolutely be a moment in the lament where the OG Noldolante becomes Noldolante 2, and even Noldolante 3. There may be the same musical motif or something, I decided that Maglor IS that good of a bard to keep it all consistent enough so you know it's all the same story, but the style changes a lot - it's been 400 years in the making, let The Music Elf have fun!

So, Point 1: Many, Many Parts, basically Maglor's FA WIP

My second thought was that, while Feanor invented his alphabet, elves learned their history mostly through oral tradition aka songs and spoken stories. Noldolante is definitely a historical record, where a historical event was archived for future generations.

(It was a also a way to deal with grief, guilt and blame Maglor and all Noldor have faced regarding First Kinslaying - free therapy! But that's not what this post is about)

Archived.

My 2.5 thought was that Noldolante isn't just recallings of how pretty and horrified the beach looked during the murdering or how mad and sorrowful the sea was at everyone during the voyage or even how awesome and charismatic Feanor looked during his speeches that every single Noldo was ready to fight Morgoth barehanded in his name - no, this is a record of who killed who, who got killed by whom, and how.

Noldor and Teleri knew each other (were friends, even!) before the First Kinslaying, so I'm confident that after a lot of interviews, detective work, and cross-referencing, Maglor could and would create a very good... name list. Practically every Noldo and Teler present during First Kinslaying would get a stanza in a song, more if he killed someone, most if he killed many people. Killers and killed would show up twice, first in a fragment listing the killers and their victims, then in a part listing the victims and their murderers. Basically it's the same thing twice, but from different POVs. With when, where and how included.

(It was seen to be in bad taste to compare kills during Maglor's Regency, when most of his interview-part work happened. People did it anyway. There were a Saddest Kill, Funniest Kill, and Weirdest Kill discusions. There was a Tier List. These were weird times to be a Feanorian Noldo.)

(It WAS in Bad Taste, but at least people talked about it. I cannot stress enough how much free therapy this lament provided)

(Little did they know, when Teleri started getting reembodied in Aman, they had very similar discussions, but more in a "I can't believe he killed me like THAT" way. Long, long, long after the First Age. Noldolante is a gift that keeps giving)

So, Maglor had all the historical grith and no common shame to create a "We Killed All These People And We Feel Bad About It" banger of a song, and every Noldo had a very personal reason to at least remember the fragments they are in. It's a hit on a scale never seen before.

(I'm not sure how to tackle the issue of Nolofinweans and Arafinweans learning about Noldolante after crossing the Ice. But there were discussions. There was anger, there was "????", there was controversy. Basically, the song got bigger and bigger rep no matter what your opinion on it was. By the time of Mereth Aderthad it was an important cultural and political piece and at least Fingon's forces were included in the main song. It had parodies.)

Point 2: Archive Function/Kill count storage. Cultural phenomen, every Noldo included

This is where my personal nonsense begins: Main Noldolante was done, there was nothing more to say about First Kinslaying, all killings and deaths were well documented.

But the Siege started. And the Noldor kept dying.

It was less dramatic than it sounded - between the big battles the siege was maintained, but orc raids also happened and sometimes one to few Noldor died in skirmishes. The legal procedure was to document the death of a fellow elf and send a word to king Fingolfin. The cultural procedure, technically started by Feranorians but adapted by many more, was to send the name, common characteristics and cause of death to Maglor's Gap. After few months, King Fingolfin would send reinforcements, short condolences and financial compensation if they had family. After few months, family of an elf would also receive a personal lament for them and a place for them in a Noldolante.

Yes, every lament Maglor created in that time was technically part of the Noldolante. Noldolante 1.5, if you will. Laments make in that time were very customized, and simpler than Noldolante Main, but were still considered a part of the same song. Of course, nobody was expected to know and remember laments for every single Noldo, younger Noldor born in Beleriand could even only know fragments about their family members. Only Maglor would ever know Noldolante in full, but it was understood that everyone had their place in The Song.

The results of Great Battles were harder to document, but Maglor did that. Of course, Dagor Bragollach was hard on him personally, but he worked his way through.

(High King Fingon forbade creating laments for his father. There were no songs for Fingolfin. Apart from in Noldolante, of course. Of course. Maglor did not share the lament with anyone, but he sat long hours and many nights with a blank paper before him, looking at the candle flame and thinking of the past and the future. The song unsung, but there)

Nirnaeth was... Maglor was never more hated and more approached at the same time than then. Still, Noldolante grew and grew, as if people knew the end was near.

It was Second Kinslaying that destroyed the myth of Maglor's song. Feanorians didn't know the Sindar they killed, but surely, they couldn't just left their names unmentioned like they did with orcs? So, Noldor talked, but the battle happened in caves - it wasn't uncommon to find dead bodies in empty rooms, with no witnesses to what happened. Surviving Sindar didn't want to share any names, even when Maglor strong-armed some into talking with him, and good for them. Maglor made a big lament anyway. Maglor, wild, with no shame and dead brothers, with legacy crumbling around him. Noldolante, with holes.

After Third Kinslaying, Noldor didn't want to talk. Lament for Sirion didn't have any names. Clearly, songs weren't a way to go anymore, it was always about live witnesses. And so Maglor raised the twins.

Lament for Maedhros was sung repeatedly. There was no one to hear it.

Point 3: Only Maglor knows Noldolante in full. But that doesn't matter, because everyone knows the important part: the Noldolante is finished. The Star of Hope rises in the West and the story goes on. The Fall has ended.

[schrodinger-swriter]

Hello! I just saw your fluff alphabet and would like to request A, I, K, O, P, Q, and U for Sir Pentious. Thank you! :)

I, K, O, P, Q, and U for Sir Pentious

You can find A in the previous alphabet post for Sir Pentious, I hope you don't mind not having it all in one post!

I hope you enjoy this, Anon C:

INJURY:

He would cope.. not very well if you were to get hurt. Given that it was hell that was a likely probability. He often sends one, or even up to three, of his egg boiz with you to keep an eye on you when he isn't around. He may even scold his eggs for allowing you to get hurt, no matter how unfair it would be. He would fret over you, treating the most basic injury as if it were a death sentence. You will more than likely have to tell him that you're not dying, and that he needs to calm down... just a little bit... If he were the one injured, I can see him trying to walk it off in the beginning... but seeing the attention he's getting from you, he might try to milk it.. just a tad. He won't ask you to do every little thing for him or overplay some of the pain, but he will definitely ask for more affection than usual!

KISSES:

He loves taking your hand and kissing it, likely dipping down as he does it to really push the dramatics. He loves kissing you on the mouth, too. Short pecks, long kisses, anything in the middle, he loves it. Going into the relationship he didn't think he had a preference of where he was kissed, but he quickly learns that he loves receiving kisses on his cheeks. Please give him a peck before you go out to do something, his hood will fan out in an instant as a grin tugs itself over his face.

ODDITY:

Everything. He's a creative and an inventor, it's kind of in the job description to be at least a little odd! He will approach you in excitement as he rattles off about an idea for a new invention he's come up with (and also, to seek for your approval if it's not meant to be a surprise for you..)

Sometimes he will go on a tangent about an invention and the skills needed for it, which might lead to him having to explain those smaller details.. has a habit of sometimes overexplaining or underexplaining.. he doesn't mean to, he's just so excited and is a little all over the place as he doesn't get much of a chance to ramble to someone about this interest of his!

He has a habit of tugging on his hood when he's embarrassed or stressed, sometimes even pulling it over his face if he's feeling particularly flustered.

PETNAMES:

"My Darling," "My Dear," "My Love," and above all else, he calls you his Beloved. He almost completely replaces your name with them when you two fully establish your relationship, only reserving your actual name for rare occasion.

As for what he likes being called... Naturally, he has a soft spot for terms of endearment from his time, but I think he would be just as ecstatic if you called him anything sweet. I like to believe he likes to be called "Sweetheart," or any variation of the "Sweet___" nicknames!

QUESTION:

Hmm... this one is a hard one... but I think sometimes he would ask for reassurance. Not just that you still love him, but to confirm things about you. Totally not because he's making something for you... and he wants you to confirm a hype specific question of what your favorite color is down to the pantone code or something along those lines... heh..

I think at some point within the series, depending on where it is in the timeline he might start asking you if you believe it's possible to ascend to Heaven after being sent to Hell. Things about the quickly approaching extermination. A lot of those questions turn into promises of victory.

UPSET:

When Sir Pentious is upset he tends to seek you out, whether he be angry or sad or stressed. He finds comfort in you, and spending time with you is by far the best stress relief for him than anything else in Hell. Usually, to cheer him up you two just talk or do an activity together! Though if he's feeling worse than usual, he might have himself sit alone in his room for a while.. this is more common before the relationship/within the early stages of it.

If you're the one upset he's going to try his best to make you feel better. Making quick inventions to bring a smile to your face, letting you vent to him.. and perhaps, if someone upset you he would try to confront them... that... usually doesn't end in his favor, leaving him bloody and bruised... but hey if he can survive getting blasted into the sky by Alastor, then he can survive most anything!

May send one of his egg boiz to keep an eye on you and/or check in on you if you're upset with him. Being apart is killing him inside, and he feels so so bad. He's already doing way more than he needs to in order to win over your forgiveness. He will grovel, too.

[literaryvein-reblogs]

Virginia Woolf: On Words

Listen to the only surviving recording of Virginia Woolf’s voice.

A transcript of Woolf’s broadcast, ‘On Craftsmanship’, BBC, 29 April 1937.

Words, English words, are full of echoes, of memories, of associations.

They have been out and about, on people’s lips, in their houses, in the streets, in the fields, for so many centuries.

And that is one of the chief difficulties in writing them today — that they are stored with meanings, with memories, that they have contracted so many famous marriages in the past.

The splendid word ‘incarnadine’, for example — who can use it without remembering also ‘multitudinous seas’?

In the old days, of course, when English was a new language, writers could invent new words and use them.

Nowadays it is easy enough to invent new words — they spring to the lips whenever we see a new sight or feel a new sensation — but we cannot use them because the English language is old.

You cannot use a brand new word in an old language because of the very obvious yet always mysterious fact that a word is not a single and separate entity, but is part of other words.

Indeed it is not a word until it is part of a sentence.

Words belong to each other, although, of course, only a great poet knows that the word ‘incarnadine’ belongs to ‘multitudinous seas’.

To combine new words with old words is fatal to the constitution of the sentence. In order to use new words properly you would have to invent a whole new language; and that, though no doubt we shall come to it, is not at the moment our business.

Our business is to see what we can do with the old English language as it is.

How can we combine the old words in new orders so that they survive, so that they create beauty, so that they tell the truth?

That is the question.

And the person who could answer that question would deserve whatever crown of glory the world has to offer.

Think what it would mean if you could teach, or if you could learn, the art of writing.

Why, every book, every newspaper would tell the truth, or would create beauty.

But there is, it would appear, some obstacle in the way, some hindrance to the teaching of words.

For though at this moment at least a hundred professors are lecturing the literature of the past, at least a thousand critics are reviewing the literature of the present, and hundreds upon hundreds of young men and women are passing examinations in English literature with the utmost credit, still — do we write better, do we read better than we read and wrote four hundred years ago when we were unlectured, uncriticised, untaught?

Is our modern Georgian literature a patch on the Elizabethan?

Well, where are we to lay the blame?

Not on our professors; not on our reviewers; not on our writers; but on words.

It is words that are to blame. They are the wildest, freest, most irresponsible, most unteachable of all things.

Of course, you can catch them and sort them and place them in alphabetical order in dictionaries.

But words do not live in dictionaries; they live in the mind.

If you want proof of this, consider how often in moments of emotion when we most need words we find none.

Yet there is the dictionary; there at our disposal are some half-a-million words all in alphabetical order.

But can we use them? No, because words do not live in dictionaries, they live in the mind.

Look once more at the dictionary.

There beyond a doubt lie plays more splendid than Antony and Cleopatra; poems more lovely than the Ode to a Nightingale; novels beside which Pride and Prejudice or David Copperfield are the crude bunglings of amateurs.

It is only a question of finding the right words and putting them in the right order.

But we cannot do it because they do not live in dictionaries; they live in the mind. And how do they live in the mind?

Variously and strangely, much as human beings live, by ranging hither and thither, falling in love, and mating together.

It is true that they are much less bound by ceremony and convention than we are.

Royal words mate with commoners. English words marry French words, German words, Indian words, Negro words, if they have a fancy.

Indeed, the less we enquire into the past of our dear Mother English the better it will be for that lady’s reputation. For she has gone a-roving, a-roving fair maid.

Thus to lay down any laws for such irreclaimable vagabonds is worse than useless. A few trifling rules of grammar and spelling are all the constraint we can put on [words].

All we can say about them, as we peer at them over the edge of that deep, dark and only fitfully illuminated cavern in which they live — the mind — all we can say about them is that [words] seem to like people to think before they use them, and to feel before they use them, but to think and to feel not about them, but about something different.

They are highly sensitive, easily made self-conscious.

They do not like to have their purity or their impurity discussed.

If you start a Society for Pure English, they will show their resentment by starting another for Impure English — hence the unnatural violence of much modern speech; it is a protest against the puritans.

They are highly democratic, too; they believe that one word is as good as another; uneducated words are as good as educated words, uncultivated words as cultivated words, there are no ranks or titles in their society.

Nor do they like being lifted out on the point of a pen and examined separately.

They hang together, in sentences, in paragraphs, sometimes for whole pages at a time.

They hate being useful; they hate making money; they hate being lectured about in public.

In short, they hate anything that stamps them with one meaning or confines them to one attitude, for it is their nature to change.

Perhaps that is their most striking peculiarity — their need of change.

It is because the truth [words] try to catch is many-sided, and they convey it by being themselves many-sided, flashing first this way, then that. Thus they mean one thing to one person, another thing to another person; they are unintelligible to one generation, plain as a pikestaff to the next. And it is because of this complexity that they survive.

Perhaps then one reason why we have no great poet, novelist or critic writing to-day is that we refuse words their liberty.

We pin them down to one meaning, their useful meaning, the meaning which makes us catch the train, the meaning which makes us pass the examination.

And when words are pinned down they fold their wings and die.

Finally, and most emphatically, words, like ourselves, in order to live at their ease, need privacy.

Undoubtedly they like us to think, and they like us to feel, before we use them; but they also like us to pause; to become unconscious.

Our unconsciousness is their privacy; our darkness is their light...

That pause was made, that veil of darkness was dropped, to tempt words to come together in one of those swift marriages which are perfect images and create everlasting beauty.

But no — nothing of that sort is going to happen to-night.

The little wretches are out of temper; disobliging; disobedient; dumb. What is it that they are muttering? ‘Time’s up! Silence!’'

Source Virginia Woolf: The Censorship of Books

[insomniac-djmm]

Dr. Gears relationship headcannons? :3

My first request for Dr. Gears! He's one of my absolute FAVORITE characters, I'm so excited to write for him! ^^

(My best friend, @shslbunnylover, makes fun of him and says he uses Life Alert and that he's so old, he invented the alphabet ToT) Also, thank so much for this request, I absolutely love your account, as well! (*´∀`*) Merry Christmas!! <3

Dr. Charles Ogden Gears Relationship Headcanons

• Gears is notorious for being expressionless to the highest degree, so when you were the only person he'd give a half-smile to, rumors started.

• And those rumors were correct: Dr. Gears had a thing for you.

• Of course, the man himself confessed to you before word got around to your ears.

• It was blunt - short and sweet.

• "I have an interest in you. Would you be interested in beginning a relationship with me?"

• Perhaps a rose as well! A small token of his affection (｡•̀ᴗ-)

• During the relationship, there was a bit of a change in his behavior, both towards you and his coworkers.

• He didn't seem as uptight, but of course, he still was. Just not as much.

• Even his reactions were finally slightly noticable!

• And with you? You could probably get a full smile out of that man. Maybe even a little chuckle.

• Others found it impressive, you thought it was sweet.

• He will always check on how you're doing, even if it's obvious how you are.

• "How are you doing today, my dear?"

• He likes hearing it from you.

• It also gets you to talk about your day as well, and he enjoys listening to your voice.

• You guys have a Talker X Listener dynamic.

• He takes note to do research on the things you bring up during your conversations.

• He even has a piece of paper where he lists things to look up for you.

• Hand-holder. No notes.

• Just kidding, I'll give some notes.

• I think he's left handed!

• So, for example, while he's doing some paperwork, he'll hold his paper down with his right hand, yeah?

• He likes to place your hand on the paper and then place his hand on yours.

• He especially likes rubbing your hand with his thumb a bit.

• His absolute favorite thing is hand-holding, at least, with you it is.

• To him, it's a nice thing, feeling the warmth of somebody else.

• The constant feedback that they, too, are alive.

• He expresses his affection with little gestures.

• Opening the door for you, bringing you a cup of coffee in the morning, waiting for you during lunchtime.

• Every little thing matters to him, and he wants all the little things to say that he loves you.

I had so much fun writing these! I had a ton of headcanons from my self-ship with him, so I got this done super quick! I absolutely ADORE Dr. Gears, so thank you so much for this request! I really, truly hope you enjoyed it! Merry Christmas!! <333

[t0ta11y-n0t-cup1d]

!!!!! hi !!! :) can u maybe write rise leo & donnie hcs (separate pls) with a reader who's super affectionate and just loves tf out of them.!!! like!!! reader is head over heels!!!

also i hate that u were self conscious while writing totally platonic ;( it was so great, i rly like the way u wrote it!!!🥹 made me feel all warm n' fuzzy n' shit

Touchy-Feely

꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡ (seperate) don + leo hcs w a supez affectionate reader!!! (physical touch, gift-giving, words of affirmation)

req ;; yes/no

g/n reader!! they/them prns

warnings ;; swearing, kinda ooc??

leo ;;

- so leo is naturally ALL over people he loves (think climbing all over raph, draping himself over mikey + donnie, etc)

- it'd be really accurate to say he's the same way with you!

- whenever you're in the lair, or just around the turtles/leo, you are going to be snatched up and there is nothing you can do about it!

- standing up? okay, leo's just gonna wrap his arms round your waist and lean his head on your shoulder.

- sitting down? either you're sitting in his lap or he's sitting in yours— or, he sits on the floor beside you so that he can lean his head on your thighs (i love doing that)

- laying in bed? CUDDLE TIME!

- that's all just to say that leo himself is very physically affectionate ;; if he got the chance he'd hold onto you and never let go

- with leo's self-esteem problems, i think it really helps to have a partner who's super affectionate!

- leo's the kinda guy to have doubts/ be like 'why are you even with me? i'm so lame and my brothers/literally anyone is so much better than me'

- so to have someone who time and time again shows how much they love him and proves that they only have eyes for him?

- it actually really helps! of course, those thoughts do come back sometimes, but it's nothing that a few kisses and a cuddle session can't fix!

- not to mention how you're always, always willing to tell him own much you love him!! because you do, you love him very much and will do anything to get those bad thoughts out of his head

- if he ever feels bad about himself or something he did, he always comes to you to get some comfort bc you comfort him in the best way

- like i wrote in Totally Platonic, leo's prone to subconsciously wagging his tail, making chittering/churring sounds at you, even fluttering his fingers around your cheeks bc red-eared slider DNA go brrr

- something that i think leo would be self-conscious of is money and ish, bc its not like he can really get much?? with the whole turtle situation

- but you, of course, being the angel you are, constantly reassures him that you don't need materialistic things for him to prove his love! you just want him, not anything else

- he sobs on the spot

- leo's the type of guy to fall HARD, so to know you're the same way? to know that you're as crazy about him as he is about you?

- he swoons, and wonders what he might've done to deserve such a wonderful partner.

- (literally save the world twice but who's counting?)

donnie ;;

- everybody, EVERYBODY KNOWS that donnie ain't a very touch-oriented guy, so at the start of the relationship, he'd deffo be overwhelmed by all the love and might ask you to tone it down (not in a mean way)

- once he gets comfortable tho he's all up for affection and cuddles :))

- you do ruin his bad-boy image tho. how is this man supposed to be dark and mysterious when your sweet self is out here making him absolutely melt???

- donnie typically shows his love through gifts and words!!!

- alike leo, he could spend HOURS singing your praise and just saying everything he loves about you (he's actually made a list organized by his most favourite qualities alphabetically.)

- i personally think that for donnie, being a middle child, he didn't get too much attention and we know for a FACT that he yearns for praise and love

- so you KNOW he's going feral if you so much as say 'wow, that's cool!' to one of his inventions

- donnie, while a little overwhelmed by all the love you show him, is really happy to have it

- don can get really stressed when doing his experiments/making his inventions, so it helps to have you around!!

- comes to you for cuddles and to rant when stuff doesn't go his way or an experiment fails

- DEFFO appreciates how affectionate and lovey-dovey you are.

- (also like leo) he can get down in the dumps and insecure bc he believes that his tech is the only 'useful' thing about himself

- so to hear you constantly being like "ahhh my bf!!! my wonderful talented smart funny bf!!!! my love my light of my life!!! i love you i love you i love you :DD" to him really brought up his spirits

- how could they not?? you're just too cute and so sweet!!

- it also helps if he feels kinda insecure in public!! people trying to flirt w you? you don't even notice because you're too busy looking at donnie.

- donnie totes makes you gifts and stuff (little robot to help you out w chores, maybe one to remind you every day how much he loves you :])

- unlike leonardo however, don prefers to keep pda to a minimum;; he likes having certain things to himself and in private

- that doesn't mean that he don't love it tho!!! he just prefers that some stuff stays behind walls

A/N ;; SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG!! but thank you so much for the request :DD im so eepy jssbbfjs,,,, anyway MEOWSSSS can't wait to work on more fics :]] they might come (even) slower tho bc im starting classes again (AGHHHHHHH)

LUV FROM ;; CUPEZ

[nogenderbee]

♡˗ˏ✎*ೃ˚ 𝕐𝕒𝕟𝕕𝕖𝕣𝕖 𝔾, ℙ, 𝕋 ₊˚ˑ༄

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ anon request: Hihi !! I see ur reqs are open, so could I request letters G, P and T of the yandere alphabet with Rui, please? Ty!

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ Hello! Yeah absolutely! I didn't do yandere alphabet for a while and I feel like I may need to get used to it again because... I dunno it kinds feels cringe ToT Anyway, I hope it's just me and it's actually not and hope you like it!

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ TW: unhealthy obsession, yandere, stalking, mentions of killing, mentions of body parts

Not putting affiliation because I'm aware of how triggering this could be.

✧ Gross = What is something they think is really romantic/sweet but is actually horrifying?

Rui has real talent for creating robots, and he's also quite obsessed with making sure you're always safe. So why not mix those two for your own good, he thought? And that's how he one day announced that he invented a drone who'll follow you around and explained all the functions... it had camera, it could scare someone away but it could also kill... he assured you it'll never harm you but how can you not feel a bit startled knowing that murderous robot follows you 24/7?

He on the other hand thinks it's act of pure affection, love and care to you. He thinks he's just proving how much he wants to take care of your well being with that. So expect him to not understand when you ask him to give it up, no matter how hard you try convincing him.

"Stop it? Oh my darling... but I can't. What if someone approaches you when I'm away? You need protection. It's enough that I turn it off when we're together and it's for your comfort only."

✧ Please take it = What presents they usually give you? What's worst and best gift you got from them?

The best gift Rui gave to you would be something you were just eyeing in a mall. You didn't even had to be with him... he just had his connections and ways to observe you~ Maybe it was a bit creepy but there was nothing weird about the gift so who are you to refuse such a generous gift? It's not like he'd let you not take it either way...

But the worst gift would only happen if you have an enemy or a bully in your life. Once he hears stories from you, others or sees on his own two eyes what's happening, he promised himself to get vengeance for you and make you proud. So one day, when you were curious how could it be person you hated stopped appearing, he presents a little gift for you. Small trophy left from your, as well as his enemy. Little... part of their that he cut off.

✧ Type = What type of Yandere are they?

Rui would be the dependent and possessive type. Due to his middle school experience, he feels stronger need to be around you and not let go of you, so you want push him away. He's willing to try anything to keep you closer to him, be it slowly working for you to trust him, bribing you or even forcing you. He's good as long as it works.

But he doesn't have that sort of patience with strangers... if you approach someone, maybe he'll trust you. But if someone approaches you? He has all sorts of scenarios in his head and would kill them with a smile for even daring to speak with you.

"No, no, you don't need to go anywhere. I already took care of those papers. Someone less busy can do it, don't you think? You should focus on me, darling..."

﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌

@bleachtheidiot @yulikesminori @toyaswif3y @bl4cktourmaline @infernoram - come get your crazy inventor~

[idontmindifuforgetme]

Do you have any poetry recommendations? The poem poll made me realize that I like. ONLY know Iraqi poets. Like the only non-Iraqi poet I can name off the top of my head is Robert Frost

i'm literally hooked on poetry. even on days where i can't sit down to read a book, i try to consume at least one poem a day bc it keeps me sane. it actually does. i recommend signing up to one poem a day newsletters--those have been a game changer for me. as for recommendations, my favorite poems change every week, but current faves (whose authors i regularly go back to/are a good starting point) would be:

elegy for my sadness - chen chen (Who invented the word / “ennui”? A sad Frenchman? / A centipede? They should’ve never / been born. They should’ve seen me / in Paris, a sad teenage / exchange student. I was so sad / & so teenaged, one day my host sister / gripped my hand hard & even harder / said, SOIS HEUREUX. / BE HAPPY. & miraculously, / I wasn’t sad anymore. / All I felt was the desire to slap my host sister. / See, I was angry in Paris, which is clearly / not allowed. One can be sad in Paris (I was) / & one can be in love in Paris (I was not), / but angry? Angry in Paris?")

a pity, we were such a good invention - yehuda amichal ( "A pity / We were such a good / And loving invention / An aeroplane made from a man and wife / Wings and everything / We hovered a little above the earth")

like a small cafe, that's love - mahmoud darwish ("I say to myself at last / Perhaps she who I was waiting for / was waiting for me, or was waiting for some other man / or was waiting for us, and did not find him/me.")

bible study - tony hoagland ("Who knows, this might be the last good night of summer / My broken nose is forming an idea of what’s for supper / Hard to believe that death is just around the corner / What kind of idiot would think he even had a destiny?")

mother and child - louise gluck ("Why do I suffer? Why am I ignorant? / Cells in a great darkness. Some machine made us; / it is your turn to address it, to go back asking / what am I for? What am I for?")

america, america - saadi youssef ("We are not hostages, America, / and your soldiers are not God's soldiers... / We are the poor ones, ours is the earth of the drowned gods, / the gods of bulls, / the gods of fires, / the gods of sorrows that intertwine clay and blood in a song... / We are the poor, ours is the god of the poor, / who emerges out of farmers' ribs, / hungry / and bright, / and raises heads up high...")

the duino elegies (seventh elegy respectively) - rainer maria rilke ("Not only the devotion of these unfolded forces, / not only the paths, not only the evening fields, / not only, after a late storm, the breathing freshness, / not only approaching sleep and a premonition, evenings... / also the nights! Also the high summer nights / also the stars, the stars of this Earth! / O to be dead at last and know them eternally, / all the stars: for how, how, how to forget them!")

the endlessness - ada limon ("How was i supposed to feel then? About moving in the world? How could I touch anything or anyone without the weight of all of time shifting through us?")

psalm - adonis ("Open my memory and study my face beneath its words, learn my alphabet. When you see foam weaving my flesh and stone flowing in my blood, you will see me. I am closed like a tree trunk, present and ungraspable like air. Thus I cannot surrender to you.")

the war works hard - dunya mikhail ("The war continues working, / day and night. / It inspires tyrants / to deliver long speeches / awards medals to generals / and themes to poets / it contributes/ to the industry / of artificial limbs / provides food for flies / adds pages to the history books / achieves equality / between killer and killed / teaches lovers to write letters / accustoms young women to waiting / fills the newspapers / with articles and pictures / builds new houses / for the orphans / invigorates the coffin makers / gives grave diggers / a pat on the back / and paints a smile on the leader's face.")

[arshipweek]

AR Ship Week - Scorpia Backstory in the Book and the TV Show

This is the last weekly post in the lead up to Alex Rider Ship Week. Only one week left!

This week we have a guest post by @icebluecyanide​ about the differences between Scorpia in the book and TV canons.

Scorpia Backstory in the Book and the TV Show

After two seasons of ominous statements and mystery, series three of the TV show finally dove deeper into the criminal organisation known as Scorpia, and the way their history intertwines with Alex’s. But what is their backstory, and how does it differ from what we see in the books? 

In this meta, I will be diving into some of the changes in how Scorpia is presented in the book (Scorpia) and the TV show. Since this is a rather broad topic, and could potentially lead to me listing every single difference from the book, I will focus specifically on the Scorpia backstory and on the structure of Scorpia as an organisation.

I’ve used book quotes throughout this meta, including page numbers. The page numbers refer to the 2014 Walker Books (UK) edition.

Scorpia 

Let’s start this off by taking a look at how Scorpia is described in both the book and the show. I’ll first give an overview of Scorpia in the book, then move on to the TV show and do a comparison.

Scorpia in the book

Scorpia was all over the world. It had brought down two governments and arranged for a third to be unfairly elected. It had destroyed dozens of businesses, corrupted politicians and civil servants, engineered several major ecological disasters, and killed anyone who got in its way. It was now responsible for a tenth of the world’s terrorism, which it undertook on a contract basis. Scorpia liked to think of itself as the IBM of crime - but in fact, compared to Scorpia, IBM was strictly small-time. (Scorpia, p. 39)

In the book, Scorpia is a criminal organisation that has its roots in the early 1980s, during the last decade of the Cold War. As we learn in Scorpia (2004), it was founded by people who were involved in the Cold War as spies or assassins or secret police for various governments, and who realised that as the Cold War came to an end, they would be able to make more money going into business for themselves.

It was a fanciful name, they all knew it, invented by someone who had probably read too much James Bond. (Scorpia, p. 38)

The name of Scorpia is taken from their four fields of operation: Sabotage, Corruption, Intelligence and Asassination. They will take on any client that is willing to pay them, and don’t care about who gets caught in the crossfire. They’re a powerful organisation, and as Julia Rothman mentions, sometimes even the intelligence agencies make use of their services for jobs that cannot be traced back to them. They operate very much as a business, and they don’t make things personal, but they also are ruthless in getting even and don’t make hollow threats. Scorpia don’t forgive and they don’t forget.

Scorpia is led by an executive board consisting of the original founders. Of the original twelve, only nine remain at the time of the book, including Julia Rothman (the only woman on the board) and Max Grendel (the oldest executive). The executives on the board are equal partners, but for each project one of them is assigned as the leader, in alphabetical order. (It’s unclear how this works for The Australian, who in some editions doesn’t have a name.)

At the time of the book, the project that Scorpia is focused on is Invisible Sword, and the executive in command is Julia Rothman. There is a client, who is offering a great deal of money for Scorpia to break the special relationship between the UK and the US, and most of the Scorpia board seem unconcerned about the principal target of the weapon being children. The only exception to this is Max Grendel, who is old and has grandchildren of the same age, who has enjoyed getting rich working for Scorpia over the years, but who now wants to retire and not be a part of the new project. Sadly, his retirement gift is a suitcase full of deadly scorpions, so his retirement is rather brief.

Scorpia are an international company, with offices and people all over the world. However, Alex first runs into them in Venice, where Mrs Rothman has a large mansion on the grand canal that is referred to as the Widow’s Palace. On the island of Malagosto, near Venice, Scorpia also has a school where they have a training and testing facility for their assassins. This is where John Rider and Yassen Gregorovich were tested and trained, and it’s where Alex also takes part in lessons. 

Scorpia in the show

Blunt: At that time, we already knew that SCORPIA were the single most dangerous emergent threat since the Cold War. (3x07)

At first glance, the Scorpia we meet in the TV show appears to be from a canon divergent AU where the organisation was all but destroyed around the time when Alex was just a baby. This is a fascinating change, and also makes intuitive sense, as of course the third series of the show came out twenty years after Scorpia (2004) did. From the start, we get hints that Scorpia in the show is different from the one in the books. 

We first learn of the name Scorpia at the end of s1, as Mrs Jones and the rest of the Department realise that Yassen Gregorovich was behind Ian’s death, and that he is still alive. Going by the descriptions we are given, Scorpia was as powerful in the past as they were when Alex met them in the book:

Smithers: I know the file, of course. At one point, they were responsible for a tenth of the world’s terrorism. 

Crawley: And political assassinations, personal vendettas. All available to the highest bidder, without remorse or compunction. (1x08)

In 2006, Scorpia was taken down by the Department, in a well-coordinated operation based on the info John Rider was able to gather. Alan Blunt was in command as all over the world, the bases and known locations of Scorpia were raided. In the chaos, some members of Scorpia went missing and managed to escape, such as Julia Rothman and Yassen Gregorovich, but when they failed to resurface in the five years that followed, their files were closed and they were assumed to be dead.

After this, Scorpia seem to have retreated to the shadows, and operated almost entirely in secret. While they no longer have the same presence in the world, they still have both funds and technology to continue their work. They have no problem spending several millions to fake the payment for the assassination of the US president in season 2 at Yassen’s request, and they have a system set in place with a phone line that can be reached only with a specifically assigned code, or else the number will be disconnected, as we see when the Department pretend to call as Martin Wilby to determine who he got his orders from. In the first two seasons, Scorpia took jobs such as helping with Dr Greif’s plan at Point Blanc, and Damian Cray’s Eagle Strike plan, and they still appear as ruthless as in the book, not caring about the deaths those plans would cause.

At first, we mostly encounter Scorpia in the scenes with the Department, where Scorpia (through Yassen) have turned Martin Wilby to pass on information about the Department and got him to lure Ian Rider to his death at Yassen’s hand. Interestingly, Ian appears to be the only person still looking for Scorpia:

Crawley: I don’t think they ever went away. I think they just got better at hiding. And we were so confident we’d finished them. Only Ian was still looking, of course. (1x08)

Ian seems to have been aware of Yassen’s survival, and presumably who he works for (“Oh Martin, you have no idea who you’re working for.” - 1x01), but none of the rest of the Department have any idea until Alex mentions having seen Yassen at Point Blanc:

Blunt: Scorpia.Mrs Jones: It explains everything. The sophistication, the global reach, and Wilby. Given our history, of course they would target us.Crawley: But we finished them.Blunt: Well, clearly not. (1x08)

In season three, we see Alex (together with Tom and Kyra) actively looking for Scorpia by visiting old locations mentioned in the files on Smither’s phone (that Kyra stole). These include Berlin and Venice, where presumably Julia Rothman had her Palace like in the book. They end up finding Julia in Malta, where she is from. This is a change from the books, where she is Welsh. We meet Nile, her apparent second-in-command, and Max Grendel, who apparently also survived the takedown.

As Alex is pulled into Scorpia, we also learn that they are planning an operation called Invisible Sword. Unlike in the book, this is not a job they took on for a client, but something Julia Rothman came up with personally. As the season goes on, we discover that while she explained it as a way to demonstrate Scorpia’s power and boost their reputation, the real objective was to take revenge against the Department for the blow they dealt Scorpia seventeen years ago.

Scorpia Leadership

Let’s narrow in further for a moment on the question of who is in charge in Scorpia. There do appear to be some changes in the leadership of Scorpia in the TV show, and part of these can be explained by the canon divergence, while others suggest that perhaps this has always been a different Scorpia. Firstly, it’s good to note that instead of talking about an executive board, the leadership are referred to as council members:

Nile: I wondered if perhaps one of the other council members decided to push their luck. (3x01) 

In general, the show appears to have less of a ‘business’ vibe compared to the book. It may be that this is a change that only came with the new Scorpia, but this may also always have been different in this universe. Similarly, we hear that Julia Rothman was elected as leader, which suggests that also the way of picking a leader isn’t the rotated schedule from the books. It appears that Julia Rothman has been elected after the failed jobs with Dr Greif and Damian Cray, in an attempt to bring Scorpia back to prominence.

Razim: We elected you because you promised to restore our influence globally. And so far, we have seen nothing. (3x01)

Speaking of Razim, we get another change from the book. The name Razim is a reference to one of the new board members brought on in Scorpia Rising in the books, and he wasn’t present in the original Scorpia book. It makes sense that with most of the organisation taken down years ago, they will have filled their ranks with new members. However, there is some suggestion that perhaps Razim was actually part of Scorpia leadership before Julia:

Julia: Razim’s always resented me. He thinks when Nicolai died, inherited my place at the table. (3x01)

Julia Rothman

Max: And besides, we both know you earned your place. (3x01)

It appears that unlike in the books, Julia Rothman was not a founding member of Scorpia in the show. This also matches up with what we learn about her from the Department file on her, where it states she ‘possesses broad knowledge of Scorpia Operational Structure and is being groomed for command’. She was most likely part of the inner circle through her husband Nicolai, given the comment about inheriting her place.

Nicolai Rothman/Mrs Rothman’s husband definitely appears to have been alive and married to her for longer in the TV show than in the book, although in both she is eventually known as the Widow.:

Mrs Rothman’s multimillionaire husband had fallen to his death from a seventeenth-storey window. It had happened just two days after their marriage. (Scorpia, p. 45)

Also an amusing detail is that in the book Nicolai Rothman is a multimillionaire, while in the TV show he’s referred to as a billionaire. Julia Rothman is canonically richer in the TV show!

Malagosto

Let’s take a moment also to look at the differences in how Malagosto is portrayed in the two canons. In both the show and the book, Malagosto is a training facility for Scorpia operatives, but that appears to be where the similarities end. The location is different in the two canons, with it being on an island near Venice in the book, and on Malta in the show. Specifically, we discover that there is a Scorpia base located underground in an old Cold War listening post on Malta. It might be that the original location had to be abandoned after Scorpia was raided, but the fact that The Department show no recognition to the name later suggests that they have never heard of it before. Definitely, the base in Malta was not known before. 

This raises some questions about whether John Rider actually trained at Malagosto in the show as he did in the book. We do have the following quote from Julia Rothman, which if taken literally suggests that he was on Malta with Alex:

Julia: Twenty years ago, your father stood where you are now. Ready to join Scorpia. (3x04)

However, if John trained at Malagosto, it is strange that this location wasn’t known to the Department or raided in the operation to take down Scorpia. So perhaps the quote should be taken metaphorically, with Alex being about to join Scorpia as his dad was, and perhaps John never trained with Scorpia. After all, in the book, he was likely only tested rather than trained, so he may have been tested elsewhere and simply put to work.

THE STUDENTS

Another difference related to Malagosto concerns the students or recruits who are present when Alex is there. In the book, d’Arc (the principal or headmaster of the school) mentions that there are usually around ten to fifteen students. Most of them appear to be people who were either part of the intelligence world or soldiers who have defected:

Alex knew all of them by now. There was Klaus, a German mercenary who had trained with the Taliban in Afghanistan. Walker, who had spent five years with the CIA in Washington before deciding he could earn more working for the other side. (Scorpia, p. 174)

They are people similar to John Rider, who already have had training of some sort that makes them suitable for Scorpia. In this sense, the school is firstly a testing facility, where Scorpia checks if people have the right skills to become part of Scorpia. Alex himself is an exception due to his age, but as d’Arc and Mrs Rothman discuss, he already has experience from both his missions and his uncle’s and MI6’s training. The other students are all older, but treat Alex surprisingly well and are friendly to him.

In the show, the recruits are all orphans and likely closer in age to Alex himself. There is no indication that Alex himself is an outlier in terms of his age. The other recruits also don’t appear to have had prior training if we take Alyona and Oleg as examples. They seem to have been children without families, either taken from orphanages or similar. Some, like Oleg, may have shown a propensity for violence which drew Scorpia’s interest, but they were not the trained soldiers or intelligence agents we see in the books.

This change could perhaps have been a result of Scorpia needing to operate from the shadows. While in the books they could recruit rather blatantly and without worrying about being noticed, they have tried to keep a low profile in the show. Perhaps they have shifted to training teenagers into operatives instead, as they have ‘No baggage, no background. It helps.’ (3x04).

It’s also noteworthy that there are only four other students aside from Alex present at Malagosto. Again, this is easily explained by Scorpia having shrunk in size and operating in more secrecy, and no doubt it made it easier for them to make the commitment of training teenagers. Sadly for Alex, they are not as nice as in the book, and he gets beaten up for being seen as weak on his first day there.

THE BUILDINGS

Another change seems to be in the buildings themselves. As mentioned, Malagosto in the show is located in an old listening post dating back to the Cold War, and that’s reflected in the lack of natural light and the bare, metallic and industrial vibes of the interior. The listening post also appears to be on a remote part of the island, but all that’s visible on the surface is a few abandoned buildings, and Scorpia seem to keep their presence low-key. 

In the book, we see the same outside appearance of abandoned buildings, as Scorpia has retrofitted an old monastery for their needs. The appearance is deceptive, however, as the insides have been modernised and Alex’s own room is much more luxurious than the one he gets in the show:

They left the main building and walked over to the nearest apartment block that Alex had seen from the boat. Again, the building looked dilapidated from the outside but it was elegant and modern inside. Jet showed Alex to an air-conditioned room on the second floor. It was on two levels, with a king-sized bed overlooking a large living space with sofas and a desk. There were french windows with a balcony and a sea view. (Scorpia, p. 164)

Alex was left alone. He sat down on one of the sofas, noticing that the room had a fridge, a television and even a PlayStation 2 - presumably put in for his benefit. (Scorpia, p. 165)

The other buildings are similarly updated, and students can train outside as the island is sheltered by trees and away from the mainland. It makes sense that in the show this is less of an option, because Scorpia are much more motivated to keep their presence hidden from the authorities. In the book, they have a legal reason to be there, as they bought the island on a lease from the Italian government, but in a world where Scorpia is assumed to be destroyed, they would need to be more careful. This explains why we only see the students go outside once for training, and that was during a night incursion exercise.

THE TEACHERS

Malagosto is a training facility, and a training facility needs instructors. This plays a larger role in the book, where we are introduced to several of the teachers at Malagosto in Alex’s time there. There is Gordon Ross, the technical specialist who teaches about weapons and explosives, Professor Yermalov, who teaches martial arts and practical skills, and Ejijit “Jet” Binnag, who teaches Botany (focused on poisonous plants). There are classrooms and textbooks and lessons as if it were a real school, but also more practical lessons such as diving and gun practice.

In the show, it’s a bit unclear who normally teaches at Malagosto. We only see two people acting as instructor – Nile and Yassen – and Yassen appears to have been assigned to Alex as a tutor rather than having general teaching duties. Nile appears to take on the role of instructor, but we also see him running around taking care of things for Julia Rothman outside, so he can’t be a full-time teacher. Perhaps we simply don’t see other instructors (much like how we don’t see the catering at Malagosto), or the training is handled more informally, with students working on their skill individually as we saw Syl doing in her first appearance.

One other thing related to the teaching at Malagosto is that in the book, John Rider is mentioned to have been an instructor there. During this time, he was also in charge of Yassen’s training for a while. This isn’t mentioned in the show, and while we get Alex asking if John trained with Yassen, we never get an answer. As Malagosto wasn’t known to the Department, as mentioned before, John was probably not a teacher in this universe.

Since we already touched on him briefly, let now take a look at John Rider and his mission to dive deeper into some of the changes.

John’s mission

Blunt: The intelligence John gathered during that time enabled us to strike at the very heart of Scorpia. Within months, we’d dismantled their entire operation. (3x07)

Based on what we are told, John’s mission is largely the same in both the book and the series. We learn that John was a decorated soldier who was in the Parachute Regiment and had seen combat before (in Afghanistan and Iraq in the show, Northern Ireland, Gambia, and the Falklands in the book). But everything seemed to go wrong for him when he killed a man in a bar fight, and was sentenced for manslaughter. 

He goes to jail for two years in the show, while in the book Mrs Rothman claims he was there for less than one, and there is some ambiguity about whether he went to jail at all:

“Everything Julia Rothman thought she knew about your father was a lie.” Mrs Jones sighed. “It’s true that he had been in the army, that he had a distinguished career with the Parachute Regiment and that he was decorated for his part in the Falklands War. But the rest of it — the fight with the taxi driver, the prison sentence and all that — we made up. It’s called deep cover, Alex. We wanted John Rider to be recruited by Scorpia. He was the bait and they took him.” (Scorpia, p. 347)

Scorpia took the bait, and John was recruited by Scorpia. In the show, we learn that John spent three years embedded in Scorpia, learning names and details about the organisation, including their long term goals and ambitions. In the book, the timeline is fuzzier, but we know he spent several months in the field as an assassin before working as an instructor at Malagosto. We are simply told that he ‘had told [MI6] as much as [they] needed to know about Scorpia’ (Scorpia, p. 348).

The reasons for breaking off the mission were similar then in both the show and the book. The risks were increasing, John had discovered most of what he set out to discover, and Helen was pregnant with Alex and John wanted to be with his family. In the book, we also specifically learn that there was a risk due to Julia Rothman, who had fallen in love with him. 

This is a point where the canons seem to deviate slightly, because the show is more explicit about John being asked to get close to Julia Rothman. The file on the Widow (Julia Rothman’s codename) mentions that a Department operative Hunter (John Rider) was assigned to develop a relationship. Julia Rothman herself told Alex that his dad was a ‘very close friend’ of hers, and showed him what are clearly love letters describing John’s feelings for her (3x03). 

Now, some of this is also in the book. Julia Rothman tells Alex she was very attracted to his father, and that he was a handsome man. And one of the letters from the show is taken straight from the book: 

My dearest Julia, A dreary time without you. Can’t wait to be at the Widow’s Palace with you again. John R. (Scorpia, p. 151)

Interestingly, we do see that Julia apparently went by her code name despite the fact that she and John became close enough over the years that she passed him information about Scorpia. John himself was known as Hunter to the Department rather than this being his Scorpia code name like in the book (although the code name isn’t mentioned in Scorpia itself). He signs the letter with his initials JR in the show, and she clearly knew him as John Rider.

It’s well possible given the way Julia Rothman doesn’t mention Alex’s mother in her initial story to Alex about John, that she was not aware at the time that he was married or that John was already with Helen. In the book, she specifically mentions that while she was attracted to him, he was married to Alex’s mother, suggesting that they never acted on the attraction.

The story of John’s capture is roughly the same, there is a trap set for him (on Malta in the book), and he is captured. A few weeks later, Scorpia kidnap a senior British civil servant (or his son, in the book) and MI6/The Department make them an offer to return John Rider to them in an exchange. This takes place on Albert Bridge in the book, while in the show it’s on another bridge somewhere. John’s death is faked, and the idea is that he will be given a new identity along with Helen and Alex so they can live quietly and without Scorpia knowing he was actually a spy.

This is the point where we get the biggest divergence in the backstory, as in the show the information gathered by John’s mission is enough to take down most of Scorpia. The operation is largely orchestrated by Alan Blunt, which is part of why Julia Rothman’s plot in the show is also aimed at him:

Mrs Jones: I’ve been looking at how we brought down SCORPIA 17 years ago. Really was an astonishing operation. Dozens of agents. Coordinates across three continents. Forty-seven key figures, dead or arrested. The entire SCORPIA hierarchy decimated overnight. You waged a private war against Scorpia, made it your mission. (3x06)

It’s not specified whether the take down of Scorpia happened before or after John and Helen’s plane was blown up by a bomb. Blunt tells Alex that ‘within months’ they were able to dismantle Scorpia’s entire operation, while Julia Rothman took six months to track John down. It seems more likely that Scorpia was taken down first, as this would give the Department an extra reason not to suspect Julia Rothman as being behind the bomb on the plane. Blunt’s reaction to Alex’s suggestion that it was Julia Rothman suggests that they didn’t have a clear suspect for all those years, which makes sense if Scorpia were believed to be defeated and not heard from again (aside from the bombing of the plane itself). WIth Scorpia gone, it also makes sense that perhaps someone became too careless in hiding the fact that John Rider is alive, as there would have been less reason to worry. 

In the book, we are first told merely that there was a bomb on the plane, which exploded and killed John and Helen and the pilots instantly. Mrs Jones and Alan Blunt seem to have no doubt about it being Julia Rothman, who had discovered the truth, although they are not clear on how she learned about it. MI6 learned valuable information about Scorpia through John’s time as an undercover spy, but they either don’t know enough to take Scorpia down for good or they don’t act on their information. 

In a way, the book takes a more cynical approach to the relationship between Scorpia and MI6. Scorpia are too large to take down completely, and any half-hearted effort to destroy them will lead Scorpia to seek revenge. And if you can’t beat them… As Julia Rothman herself points out, the secret services may nominally oppose Scorpia, but they are not above making use of their services:

The secret services can’t do anything about us. We’re too big and they’ve left it too late. Anyway, occasionally some of them make use of us. They pay us to do their dirty work for them. We’ve learnt to live side by side! (Scorpia, p. 132) 

Wrapping it all up

So what does it all add up to? As we’ve seen, the show’s portrayal of Scorpia shows an organisation that was nearly brought down seventeen years ago, and that has been operating in secrecy ever since. This single divergence explains most of the differences that we see in the present day structure of Scorpia, from younger recruits to the new leadership. However, we also saw that some aspects have always been different in this universe. The code names for both Julia Rothman and John, as well as the fact that John never mentioned Malagosto show that the backstory in the show was different even before Scorpia was taken down.

In the end, Scorpia is a different organisation in the book and the show, but in many ways it is also still the same. They are a group of people who are ruthless in their pursuit of power and money, who have no compunction about killing and even enjoy it. Scorpia may have been brought to the brink of destruction in the show, but even while hidden from the world, they have been able to keep up their activity for seventeen years. 

Until they encountered Alex Rider, that is… :) 

[rosesloveletters]

1971!Willy Wonka SFW Alphabet.

Pairing: 1971 Willy Wonka x Reader

Word Count: 2,319

Warnings: no major content warnings apply.

Summary: Filled out SFW alphabet template.

Author's Note: Just a little something-something since my next full fic won't be posted until Wednesday.

divider created by @/saradika on Tumblr.

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

Once he has settled into the relationship, the amount of affection his partner receives from him is boundless. He prefers private intimacy rather than PDA – casual touches, chaste kisses and quick hugs are alright, though. He also likes to kiss the back of your hand. 

When you are alone, you can expect a lot more from him. He will cuddle but prefers to do so in bed before you both fall asleep rather than at any other time. If you’re sitting by him, occasionally he’ll just drop his head onto your shoulder. 

He is casual and somewhat indifferent; he is comfortable with any kind of affection if his partner is as well. 

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

Willy has not had a best friend since boyhood. He has been isolated inside his factory and therefore has not had the opportunity to make friends as an adult and, even if he had, he was far too busy and concerned with his business and inventions. That being said, it would take him some time to settle into having and/or being a best friend. 

Whether you had met him in your youth or were lucky enough to befriend the reclusive chocolatier later in his life, he would always be considerate of you and would do his best to make sure that you were comfortable and safe. He is a bit unpredictable, so you can expect some surprises along the way and it would take quite a bit of time for him to show you his true nature, but once you’ve achieved mutual trust in each other, being friends with Wonka is very rewarding and one of the most exciting and fun aspects of your life. 

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

In short, yes.

Willy Wonka is a very private person and would appreciate the intimacy of cuddling. He likes when his partner lays on top of or against him with their head on his chest. Sometimes he’ll spoon you, but when he does that he almost always falls asleep. 

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

I think settling down is something he never gave much thought to. If the right person came along, he would be open to it, but he does not prioritize finding a relationship. 

Since he has spent so much time alone inside his factory, he is responsible for his own meals and cleaning, even though he could easily hire someone else to do it or have the Oompa Loompas take care of him, he much prefers doing it himself. 

He is an excellent cook – his skills of making delicious confections extends to making proper meals. 

He keeps his living space very tidy. Despite the mess that is his Inventing Room, if his living area was that messy and disorganized it would drive him crazy. He keeps his person and his home very neat and clean. 

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

Willy would take this very seriously. He values honesty at its core and he would want to be upfront about ending things.

If he chose to end things, you most likely would not see or hear from him again. 

When Wonka makes up his mind about something, especially something this serious, usually a tremendous amount of thought has gone into it. 

He won’t make this decision lightly.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Once Wonka trusts you implicitly (and it takes a long time to get to that point with him) you won’t be able to get rid of him. He holds fast to those he trusts because it is so rare that he finds someone who is not out to get him or make a profit off him or his ideas. 

However, the idea of getting married is somewhat daunting to him. As someone who does not trust easily at all, marriage would be a huge step and he would want to be absolutely certain it was what he and his partner both want. He would not want to rush and would take his time, but if and when he proposes, his partner would know without any doubt that he meant it. 

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Willy is very gentle. 

His natural speaking voice is very soft; he has always been tenderhearted, for the most part. 

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

He adores hugs. 

Innocent acts of affection are his favorite. 

His hugs are usually warm, tight and all-encompassing. Sometimes you’ll get a brief, almost hesitant little hug or side hug if the two of you are in someone else’s company; the lingering hugs are saved for when it’s just the two of you. 

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

It takes Willy a long time to say it, but when he does, there’s no regret or doubt behind his words. He never does something so serious on a whim; it takes him quite a while to build up trust in a person, but hearing him say “I love you”, no matter how long it takes to hear it, is proof that he feels comfortable and that his feelings run deep. 

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

A bit surprising, but Wonka is extremely territorial. 

What’s his is his and he is not sharing. 

He doesn’t mind if you have friends, even if they are the opposite gender. The only time he gets jealous is if he notices someone trying to flirt or showing romantic interest in you. If this happens, he never gets upset with you and is quick to put an arm around you or any other innocent touch to assert that you are taken. 

If it happens in front of him, expect him to make snarky little quips like he did throughout the factory tour. 

His voice is always so polite that there’s always a delayed reaction to his insults. 

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

Willy is a little stingy with kisses, especially on the lips. 

Chaste pecks are okay, but he keeps the full-blooded make out sessions to a minimum. 

He prefers cheek kisses or to kiss the back of your hand. 

When he’s feeling especially affectionate, he’ll kiss you anywhere that you’ll let him. 

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

Willy is good with children who are respectful, sweet and polite (i.e. how he treated Charlie at the end of the film.) 

He doesn’t mind being around kids, but if they are disrespectful and don’t heed his warnings or follow his instructions, he’s swift to deliver consequences. 

He knows how to speak to children and how to interact with them, but he does not have plans to have any of his own. The best part about being around children that aren’t his is that he can spend time with them and play with them, but they go home at the end of the day and he then has time to himself. 

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

You won’t usually see much of Wonka in the mornings. He is an early riser, sometimes even waking up before dawn. His mind is fresh early in the day and he does his best work when he’s wide awake. He’ll head down to the Inventing Room pretty early to get started, especially if he’s on the brink of some new creation. 

If you’re up early, you might catch him, but if you prefer to sleep in, you won’t see him unless he pops in to check on you or you go looking for him. 

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

Willy’s schedule is practically nonexistent, so it really depends on whether he’s in a creative mood or not. On nights that he doesn’t stay up inventing till all hours, he’ll spend it in your company. 

He doesn’t like to watch television very much but will watch it if you’ve got it on. 

He loves reading and will sit for hours with a cup of tea and a good book (he might even read to you if that’s something you like.) 

He likes cuddling in bed with you at night until both of you fall asleep.

Sometimes he has a bit of trouble winding down, especially if he’s been tinkering or has ideas for new treats, so on those nights you might have to help him settle. Run him a bath, read to him, tell him about your day, etc. Anything helps, as long as it’s quiet and relaxing. 

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

You’ll get bits and pieces from him, but it takes a while to connect all the dots. 

Wonka is an enigma and never gives away all his secrets at once. It takes a very long time before you start to see his true personality shine through. He likes to keep people on their toes and trying to guess his next move. 

You can learn a lot about him if you listen, so pay close attention.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

Patience is a virtue that Wonka has plenty of.

He is extremely patient; it takes a great deal to get him to the end of his rope. 

He can be pushed to his limits and he still won’t snap, but once that fuse is lit, he has quite a temper. 

When he does break, he shatters.  

He does not yell or shout very often, but when he does is almost frightening. At these times is he incredibly blunt and brutally honest, which can and has offended people in the past.

Once he calms down, though, he will be extremely apologetic. 

Fortunately, it is rare that his anger ever gets to that point.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

Wonka’s mind is his greatest gift. 

He never forgets anything that you tell him, which is both a blessing and a curse. 

He might seem scatterbrained when he’s working, but that isn’t because he has forgotten. If his mind is preoccupied with other things, it might make him seem forgetful, but you best believe he remembers everything. 

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

Willy does not pick favorites when it comes to the people he loves and trusts; there are not very many people allowed into his inner circle, so he considers every moment a gift. 

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

Willy is very protective. 

Security is very important to him, not just for you, but for him too. 

You are safe inside his factory. No one gets in or out without his knowledge and direct approval. 

He does not leave the factory often because of his status; he would be swarmed by adoring fans, which would not offend him, but when he wants to spend time alone or with his partner, this would get tiresome. 

He’s at his most comfortable inside the world of his creation. 

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

When Wonka does something, he goes out of his way to take things to the extreme i.e. the construction of his Chocolate Room. 

He would put much effort into dates and anniversaries. His gifts would be thoughtful and considerate of your likes and interests. You can almost always expect some sweet treat of some kind. 

He is helpful with daily tasks, having been used to taking care of himself on his own and enjoying his own independence. 

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

Willy has a bit of trouble being open, especially about himself. 

All things considered, it is understandable, given that he has been taken advantage of. So many people have tried to use him for their own gain and it is sometimes difficult for him to put things into perspective and understand that not everyone wants something from him. 

He is not very forthcoming with information about himself and this might lead to disagreements. He does his best to listen to you and communicate, even if it is hard for him to open up to you. He wants your relationship to be as healthy as it can be and that means learning to trust that you have his best interests at heart. 

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

He is a bit vain. 

He cares about his appearance and his outfits, though eccentric and somewhat extravagant, are tasteful. He likes to match garments i.e. his shoes with his hat or he’ll pick accessories to match his eyes. 

Sometimes he tries to style his hair a little bit, but his curls are so unruly that most days he’ll just wear his hat and leaves his hair alone. 

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

I think that Wonka would not have realized how incomplete his life was until he met you. 

The irony is that his imagination has imprisoned him. He became so successful that his competitors tried to take advantage of him and he was betrayed by those whom he trusted. He can do absolutely anything that he wants and yet he will never be able to truly be free because he must isolate himself so that the world does not ruin him. 

Wonka could never be free in the sense that he might someday have a normal life. All his happiness and joy are manufactured; he does not know a life outside of the factory. 

Nothing is an impossibility for him and yet the one thing he cannot do is create love. 

Love is something that must be found and cultivated over time. 

A romantic partnership with him would take a while to grow, but with time, it would blossom into something beautiful and he would come to realize how much he had been missing. 

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

Willy says in canon that his Chocolate Room is where his dreams become reality and some of his realities become dreams…

What if the boat ride scene are his nightmares?

It would make sense, considering that every room in the factory contains things that he has invented or dreamed up out of his own head. 

It would only be right to assume that the boat ride scene is something that has manifested from inside his mind. 

These are the things which frighten or torment him. He purges them and gets them out of his mind so that he can focus on more wholesome things. We all have troubling thoughts from time to time and we can either put them out of our head or bottle them up; Wonka chooses to store them away where he can confront them by healthy means and step away when it gets to be too much. 

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

In general, Wonka hates: bad manners, questions, untrustworthy people and people with no imagination, to name a few. 

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

He doesn’t sleep very much.  He would be fine with seven hours of sleep at the most, but he’s capable of running on no less than five. 

[weolucbasu]

So, @da-proti-toku-grem kind of inspired me to make a lengthy post, sharing some positive vibes across the fandom, listing the reasons why I love each member of Joker Out and why I would go full mom-mode on them and cook for them and bake them gluten-free cookies.

Anyway:

A Joker Out, brain-rot, appreciation post

(members listed in alphabetical order)

Bojan

First up - as someone who had the chance to see them live, he is an insane performer

His ability to enchant the crowd is insane and you can tell really well that he has great acting abilities too

Watched him in Gospod Profesor too, spot on for someone who is a so-called amateur

His singing voice is... amazing to say the least, it feels really unique

Also, the way he talks, the sound of his voice, the words he uses, his pronunciation, if there were awards for talking he would get one

The languages he speaks, I want to study him, linguistically, he is truly a phenomenon

We of course love a bilingual king

He looks like he has his priorities straight

I also respect him so much for how open he is about his mental illness

I might relate to him a bit too much at times whoops

And the fact that he can somehow befriend literally anyone??? Love that

His friendship with Jere is the main one of course

Oh yeah and the fact that he literally helped people who collapsed at their gigs a few times

Bless him, he deserves all the rest he is hopefully getting

Jan

First things first, I have a soft spot for math guys

And the way he talks about math is fascinating (but you still won't get me to like it Jan)

Cat dad???? We absolutely adore Igor and a man loving cats is such a green flag

I know people say he mumbles a bit and it's hard to understand him at times, but idk, he talks nice and slowly, so it's still really easy to understand him

He comes from my home region, so I am very biased haha

Also, every band needs a guitarist with luscious locks

He absolutely owns the colour red, that colour was invented specifically for him

The nose ring suits him so well too, this man KNOWS what fits him

And if that ends up being jackets with nothing underneath when he performs, THEN SO BE IT

I know people call Kris the lesbian icon, but from what I've seen lesbians are very drawn to Jan as well

Oh, and he gives me Klaus from the Umbrella Academy vibes (I blame the hair and the pink boa)

Jure

Holy shit, sunshine in human form????

The most underappreciated one in the band imo

His surname literally means 'cat' and I am so normal that Jan has called him 'muca'

He also comes from my region haha, bias again

He's really good at filming, he actually shot a few things for RTV (national TV station) and edited them as well, god, talent

Also playing drums... I have sang, I have played guitar, played bass, but drums is something I feel like I could NEVER do, so hats off to you

As @da-proti-toku-grem pointed out, THE MOLE ON HIS LIP? weak knees, yes

He also reminds me of a good friend of mine and I vibe with him so much, I feel like I would vibe with Jure as well

I really don't like the fact that drummers tend to get ignored and I just wish there was more Jure performing content

Though I love it how every time, during Novi Val, he comes to the front and hangs with the others

His hair also looks so soft and fluffy aaaaaa

Again, biased but he resembles my bf the most out of everyone so hmmmm

Kris

The baby of the band! (and the only one in the band I could actually call 'mulc')

In case you didn't know yet, he's half Dutch

And he speaks Dutch, which, as someone who speaks Dutch (in theory, not in practice) makes me really happy

I wish to study him linguistically as well

Also his parents' story feels very close to me, as I'm dating outside of my culture as well

According to him he was menace as a kid and I think we should normalise the fact that you can become a better person as you grow up

But pls don't honk at me on the road Kris, pls, I will cry

The songs he wrote??? NGVOT and Vse kar vem??? Oh boy, I love them, adore them

His holey sweaters are also a vibe

Dutch fans, if you don't shower him and the rest of the band with gifts at their Dutch concerts, I will be mad

Also gotta honorably mention Maks

They gotta be my fav nepo-but-not-really babies out there

Kinda like Maya Hawke?

I am ranting

He also looks like the only member of the band that I would fight, and idk why

Also, I must know if he supports Max Verstappen haha

Minus points for chemistry though, I cannot with that

Nace

Okay everyone

Here we go

We have reached my beloved

I love all of them, but Nace just a bit more

It was love at first sight, I cannot lie

I have a soft spot for bassists and he might actually convince me to try and play bass again

He has been playing it for so long too??? like wow

Oh and of course; THE TATTOOS, BLESSETH BE THE TATTOOS

I will always go feral about his tattoos

At every concert

I know he was the last to join the band but it looks like he fits in so nicely, it's beautiful

Strong mom-codded dad friend vibes

He kinda is the dad of the band haha

And he looks like he gives amazing hugs (lucky all of you who had managed to get one already)

A nice addition to the band

Oh and he's apparently shit at sports which is like... felt

Plus the fact that he wanted to be a vet?

Me too boo, me too, but neither of us is there now

Anway, I'll stop now. In conclusion, this band has my whole heart and they deserve every good thing that happens to them and so much more.

[melonthesprigatito]

My idea on who I think would make the PERFECT villain for The Incredibles 3 (not that they're ever going to make one***, this could also just be a fanfic idea)

***EDITOR'S NOTE: THIS WAS WRITTEN IN NOVEMBER 2023, NEARLY A YEAR BEFORE THEY ANNOUNCED INCREDIBLES 3, I WAS A FOOL FOR DOUBTING IT WOULD GET MADE

NaNoWriMo somehow dragged me kicking and screaming back into my The Incredibles hyperfixation that I haven't thought about since 2021. Drafting up a long Tumblr post in my Notes app for a few days totally counts, right? (Probably not but whatever, I am fukcing passionate about The Incredibles lore, I need to ramble)

So, the villains of The Incredibles and Incredibles 2 are both genius inventors with no superpowers who use their technology to fight the heroes. What if, for the third villain, they ditched that idea and had a villain who was a Super?

Who'd be able to fill that role? Would they invent an entirely new character who is a Super? It wouldn't be too farfetched of an idea, they did invent two new Super supervillains in Lego Incredibles, The Anchor Man and Brainfreezer, one with hydrokinesis and the other with.... functionally cryokinesis like Frozone except she controls ice cream. 

But what if... the villain was an already existing Super? That already poses a problem, a majority of the Supers in the present day of The Incredibles are either dead from Syndrome's Omnidroid or an unfortunate cape snag. The only surviving Supers from the pre-Super Ban Glory days are Mr Incredible, Elastigirl and Frozone and possibly Fironic and Plasmabolt (and only because they never showed up in Syndrome's Operation KRONOS database.)

Fironic is pretty ambiguous if he's still alive or not, but Plasmabolt for its practically a 100% chance of survival for a few reasons:

1. Her profile says she keeps her hero and civilian lives strictly separate, so she might have had no desire to go moonlighting as a hero like Mr Incredible did

2. She's a forest park ranger. She probably lives off-grid in a shack in the woods or something. 

3. The way Psycwave, Everseer and Macroburst are killed one after the other, but Plasmabolt isn't counted with them. All four of these Supers were part of a superhero team called The Phantasmics. Mirage probably used their connection to find all of them, maybe Plasmabolt fell out of contact with her old friends.

Plasmabolt herself might have been a good villain candidate, having lost faith in humanity after learning how the National Supers Agency failed to keep track of her old friends, of all the Supers, and didn't notice that Syndrome was picking them all off. 

Buuuuuut she's not the one this post is about. There's another that would probably be an even better villain, mostly because she has a personal tie to one of the main characters.

This is one of the features on the bonus disk of The Incredibles: a full set of character files and audio interviews of most of the Supers (except for Tradewind, Vectress, Blitzerman and Fironic. They didn't get profiles.) 

It's listed in alphabetical order, featuring Apogee, Blazestone, Downburst, Dyna Guy, Elastigirl, Everseer, Frozone, Gamma Jack, Gazerbeam, Hypershock, Macroburst, Meta Man, Mr Incredible, Phylange, Plasmabolt, Psycwave, Stratogale, Splashdown, Stormicide, Thunderhead and Universal Man. 

The one I want to draw attention to is this one. 

(Side note, it’s kinda frustrating that the only way to find images of most of these guys in colour is to look for random comic strips and the freaking Lego game of all things. I’m just gonna link this fan art too because I think it rocks and is probably the best image of her https://www.tumblr.com/pazam/183219465026/no-gadgets-no-gimmicks?source=share)

THIS, is Blazestone, the blorbo- I MEAN, the Super I think would make a great villain in a hypothetical third Incredibles movie. Or a Frozone spinoff movie. Either works. 

I think she'd make a good villain for a number of reasons.

1. SHE'S ALREADY BEEN THE MAIN VILLAIN OF ANOTHER OFFICIAL THE INCREDIBLES STORY. 

Let me highlight something important from her profile. "ARRESTED AND JAILED. RECRUITED BY NSA. WATCH CLOSELY TO ENSURE SHE OPERATES WITHIN NSA GUIDELINES" 

That's right, Blazestone is actually a reformed criminal. This one little detail from her profile is a major plot point in the novel Elastigirl: A Real Stretch.

She was paired with Universal Man as part of her rehabilitation. In the novel, they're constantly arguing, they constantly insult each other. Universal Man is an incredibly strict rule follower and tries to keep her in line. He thinks she'll never make it as a true Super if she doesn't follow the guidelines and acts recklessly ("THESE TWO WOULD BE GREAT IF THEY DON'T KILL EACH OTHER FIRST")

She hates being constantly monitored and forced into teams with other Supers and wishes they'd give her the freedom to do what she wants, as opposed to being constantly badgered into being a better person and following the guidelines

Eventually, Blazestone gets so sick of the National Supers Agency that snaps and decides that the only way she'll be able to do what she wants is to KILL ALL THE OTHER SUPERS SO THERE'S NO ONE TO STOP HER FROM TAKING OVER. 

In fact, her plan involves 

1. Steal a shipment of the ZAP chemical (the novel's McGuffin, a radioactive chemical used as a superpower enhancer that has various effects depending on which Super it's used on. For most of them, it disables their powers entirely, for some it makes their powers malfunction and Apogee is the only Super who's powers are actually enhanced by it.) 

2. Secretly recruiting all the criminals she jailed as her henchmen and breaks them out of jail on the day of the Super Appreciation Day celebrations. These henchmen are disguised as other Supers and blend in with all the other cosplayers entering the Costume Contest. 

3. Attack the Supers Appreciation Day celebration at the pier. Trap EVERY SINGLE SUPER inside a band shell covered by a net that's coated ZAP which basically fucks up all of their powers. She then lifts the band shell off the ground and was heading towards the ocean to drop it in and drown them all.

 (a few pages later)

.... I'm serious, that's what actually happens in the climax. 

Never mind the fact that she's touching the net covered in the chemical that needed to be handled with heavy gloves WITH HER BARE HANDS BECAUSE HER SUPERSUIT HAS SHORT SLEEVES in order to lift the band shell. ...And the fact that she has no super strength so shouldn't have been able to carry the weight of a structure and 20+ Supers.

Blazestone actually mentioned earlier in the novel that ZAP had no effect on her, and while the novel never mentions it, my theory is that Blazestone is the only other Super who's powers are enhanced by ZAP. Apogee was also powered up by ZAP... in small doses but being that close to the netting enhanced her powers too much so she couldn't assist in the climax without incinerating everyone with the power of the sun. Blazestone must have lied about ZAP not having an effect on her to eliminate her as a suspect for the theft of the ZAP. 

ANYWAY, Blazestone went full supervillain and that's the last we heard of her until she showed up dead in Syndrome's Project KRONOS database. Between Supers Appreciation Day and the beginning of the Super Ban, she might have resumed her criminal activities and became part of Municiberg's Rogues Gallery. 

As the Super Ban went into effect she might have been kept in a maximum security facility for a few years until she managed to break out into a world where Supers are in hiding. She might have used her powers to commit smaller robberies to survive, which might have been how Mirage tracked her down..

But wait, she's dead isn't she? So how could she possibly be the main villain of Incredibles 3 if she's dead?

2. SHE'S ONE OF THE FEW SUPERS WHO COULD HAVE PLAUSIBLY SURVIVED THE OMNIDROID BY FAKING HER DEATH.

She's the 6th Super to have been killed by Syndrome, and is probably the Super Syndrome tested the Omnidroid's fireproofing on, hence when it's immune to lava. 

Except.... Blazestone could have been marked as "Terminated" when she really wasn't.

But how, exactly? The model of Omnidroid that killed her was v.X2 (the highest being v.10) so it was a VERY early model. Too early to have all the little issues ironed out. Perhaps there was a flaw that Blazestone exploited that kept her alive. 

There's also Blazestone's powerset.  She has a threat rating of 5.5, which sounds low until you realise that the highest is Gamma Jack with 7.9 Her powers are listed as pyrokinetic discharge, heat control, heat resistance, high agility and flight (by riding on heated air) which is pretty OP by itself but there's one power not listed on the file that Blazestone mentions having.

From the Bonus Disk Audio Interviews: (sped up because she was talking through the entire interview on 2x speed) "Wait what, do you want me to say the whole thing again? I thought I was completely clear, are you- Do you want me to go back again? The whole thing? I don't understand... (back to normal speed because she realised she wasn't in the dimension where people talk really fast, I guess?) "...OH, okay. *laughs* I am so sorry, I know what the problem is! I can't *laughs again* I keep on forgetting which dimension that I'm in! Wait, which... Which dimension am I in?"

From Lego Incredibles: "Wait, which dimension is this? Never mind, I’m sure I’ll find out soon enough.”

That's right, apparently Blazestone has the ability to warp herself to other dimensions. And this isn't an out of the blue thing that probably isn't canon either, Incredibles 2 shows off exactly how that power would function.

(Transcript from Incredibles 2)

Escaping by warping to another dimension is a VEEEERY good method of hiding your own body.

Picture this: Blazestone is contacted by Mirage. She's told a lie about the Omnidroid, it's the government's secret project and how it's went rogue. She gets told they looked for her because she's the only Super who defected from the NSA, they need her specifically. If they approached any other Super they might contact the NSA and expose the secret project. So they need her because she won't tattle. 

Blazestone goes to Nomanisan Island and is told to go to Room A113 to wait for instructions. She gets bored and hates being told what to do so goes to explore. She finds the lava waterfall and flies through, only to find Syndrome on his computer looking over his Operation KRONOS files. She realises that they lured her to die, that she's not the first one they called to destroy the robot, they lied to her and now she's trapped. She goes back to Room A113, and while they're unaware that she found out, she starts asking too many questions. 

The Omnidroid x.V2 is sent after her. She's not fighting to disable it for a sum of money, she's fighting for her life. Blazestone is agile, she flies out of reach of the Omnidroid, and hurls fireballs at it as it has no methods of hitting her back. Until it learns to throw its own projectiles at her. It uproots trees, throws rocks etcetera. It gets an unlucky hit in and knocks her to the ground. Suddenly Blazestone realises that it's getting more accurate, it's predicting where she'll fly next. There's no winning against it. They're near the volcano at this point so Blazestone makes a beeline towards it, if she could just reach the lava.... 

She's inside the lava caves, she flies directly over the lava. She's heat resistant. She baits the Omnidroid into throwing one more boulder and allows herself to get knocked into the lava. She's entirely submerged. Syndrome is watching the fight through hidden cameras, waiting for her to emerge, but she doesn't. Syndrome makes a quip about how the lava must have been too hot for even Blazestone to handle and marks her down as terminated. In reality, Blazestone warped to the other dimension the second she went under, tricking them into thinking her body melted away in the lava. 

As for how Syndrome didn't know about her dimensional warping power, the fact that it's not listed on her National Supers Agency file kinda feels like the NSA didn't believe she had that power. She's a former criminal who probably figured that she she'd defect from being a Superhero at some point. If she ended up in a jail cell, she could teleport out of it. If they knew she could teleport they might have found some way to neutralise that power before sending her to jail. So Blazestone kept it a secret in the even that she'd need to escape from some where. 

So Blazestone lives and freaks out about her near death experience. Except... She draws the wrong conclusion about Syndrome. She doesn't know that the government is actually oblivious to the fact that Syndrome is developing a robot strong enough to fight Mr Incredible using Supers as test subjects. She thinks the government is hunting down Supers and killing them with the Omnidroid. 

She goes cold turkey on crime in case the government finds her again, but after all that, a deep resentment and rage bubbles up inside of her. 

Flashforward to after Incredibles 2, when the Super Ban is lifted and the National Supers Agency is re-established and is recruiting Supers again. The details of Project KRONOS are released to the public. Blazestone's rage boils over. 

She hates that the National Supers Agency is up and running to control Supers again like how they suffocated her with their rules and trapped her in a dysfunctional partnership with Universal Man, she hates that ordinary people tried to wipe out Supers when THEY should be in charge. 

Remember in Incredibles 2 when Evelyn mind controlled Mr Incredible, Elastigirl and Frozone and made them forced them to say something into the camera during the public broadcast before they hijacked the hydrofoil to make them look bad?

Yeah, Blazestone ACTUALLY believes that. 

As far as anyone is aware, Blazestone is dead. She might hide her face to make sure nobody figures out it's her. She could target the DevTech/Wannabe Supers (Voyd, Screech, He-Lectrix, Brick, Krushauer and Reflux) and shake their confidence in the Supers Agency or the public's faith in Supers, after all, the Supers Agency let all the old Supers die, they public turned on you years ago, who's to say they won't turn on you again? Look, there's already politicians who disagree with the Super Ban being lifted and want to put heavy restrictions on Super activity. I think she'd be after Voyd specifically because she's an anxiety ridden easily manipulated mess who is also potentially a threat. After all, Voyd's power is portals, and she can follow Blazestone when she dimensional warps...

She rallies a bunch of other young Supers who felt betrayed by the government banning Supers, perhaps she even manipulates a grieving Plasmabolt who's still mourning her teammates' deaths into acting as a mole in the National Supers Agency. She wants Supers to be on top while all the puny normals get subjugated like they deserve.

Baaasically she becomes Pixar Magneto? ... I'm not 100% certain, I'm not all that familiar with X-Men? I just kinda know who he is from watching one movie years ago. I don't know, I suck at writing allegories, I just have the vague idea in my head and I dunno how to put it to paper properly. If I've said something bad or made a bad comparison, I'm sorry. I'm writing this section at 3am.

3. SHE HAS AN EMOTIONAL CONNECTION TO ONE OF THE MAIN CAST.

If The Incredibles was about Mr Incredible and Incredibles 2 was about Elastigirl, who's the third member of their trio who hasn't got a chance to be a protagonist yet? Let's bring up the profiles again, shall we?

Notice anything?

"ONCE PARTNERS WITH FROZONE. BUT RELATIONSHIP RAN HOT AND COLD."

"FORMER PARTNERS WITH BLAZESTONE (ROMANTICALLY?)"

OH SNAP THAT'S RIGHT, FROZONE AND BLAZESTONE USED TO BE PARTNERS. POSSIBLY ROMANTICALLY.

Blazestone was partnered with Frozone first before the NSA shoved her into the Beta Force with Universal Man. This is purely headcanon, but I like to imagine the Frozone/Blazestone team was known as the Alpha Force because Beta comes after Alpha. The sentence "relationship ran hot and cold" aside from being a bad pun, kinda implies that at some point the fluctuation led to them having a huge falling out and splitting their team apart so the NSA could try again with Universal Man.

I found this on Reddit's Tumblr sub and honestly, my thoughts exactly.

Imagine the DRAMA of Frozone finding out that his former "Enemies to lovers to enemies" partner who tried to drown him on Supers Appreciation Day that one time who he thought was dead is suddenly alive again and is currently leading a gang of Supers to attacking people. There could be a deep dive into what their partnership was like, how he reacted to her fall from grace and all the mixed feelings of seeing her alive again in the present day.

Maybe this could finally be the opportunity to show Honey on screen. I mean, she HAS a design now and an entire deleted scene that they cut out because it caused pacing issues

Imagine Frozone lying battered and bruised on the ground from Blazestone fighting him, and Honey runs to his defence. Blazestone mocks her like "What could you possibly do to me? You're powerless!" and then Honey takes her completely by surprise by pulling out a metal baseball bat or some other mundane household weapon and beats the ever loving shit out of her.

Another idea I had that doesn't really fit into any section is the idea of bringing the Deavor siblings back. Winston and Evelyn having a fractured relationship after the events of Incredibles 2. Winston visiting her in jail trying to understand why she'd risk their father's legacy and endangering DevTech by connecting it with the attempted mass murder with a boat. Evelyn snapping back that he never noticed how she was feeling as they grieved for their parent's deaths because he was too focused on thinking that they died because there was no Supers around anymore to save them.

Blazestone kidnapping both of them and forcing Evelyn, the one who hates Supers with her entire being to remake the Screenslaver technology by threatening to burn Winston to death if she doesnt comply. Why does Blazestone need the hypnosis tech? Because she's aware that some of the Supers she recruited might not be 100% loyal and wants to control their minds to keep them in line if she has to. Because she doesn't care at all about any of the other Supers, she just wants to use them for her own gain so that SHE can control the city. Plasmabolt is definitely going to be the one to betray Blazestone in the end. She realises that Everseer, Macroburst and Psycwave wouldn't have wanted her to harm innocent people to avenge their deaths, so she'd fight alongside The Incredibles family, the Wannabe Supers, and Frozone.

Aaaand that's all I have to say, it somehow took me three hours to move all this text from Google Docs to Tumblr and find accompanying images.

Hope you liked my probably badly written sequel idea

[syn4k]

any headcanons on minecraft writing systems?

yes! sorry for the late answer i just rambled out loud for fifteen minutes about this but okay so naturally occurring languages such as Sumerian, Latin, Chinese, etc are strongly influenced by the medium they were written in

for example, take Old Norse, a language whose characters (runes) are very stiff and angular. as it goes, these were carved into rock a lot, as i dont think the Norse had paper. this makes sense because a straight line is easier to chisel into rock than a curved one. there's an indigenous language i read about where they carve the letters into leaves, so the shapes are like that to avoid tearing the leaf! the Chinese invented paper and their script is long and flowing and traditionally painted with a pen and ink.

the Standard Galactic Alphabet, the alphabet written for Commander Keen, was adapted to Minecraft to be used as the enchanting table script. it is is very angular and contains almost no curving lines. see below:

you would have no problem carving this into a wall. pretty cool how well that works out, yeah?

now with all of this said, my theory is this: the Minecraft Enchanting Table Language was a naturally constructed language and was originally carved into hard things before it was translated to paper. given most people's ideas of how enchanting works in-game (inscribing it physically directly into the object in question), this lines up perfectly, and also fits with the Grindstone: grindstones irl do exactly that, use a rough edge to grind surfaces clean. it fits!! it all fits!!!! waow!!!!

so yeah. langage 👍