#ana mate

[painted--smile]

🦋 𝑪𝒛𝒆𝒔́𝒄́ 𝑴𝒐𝒕𝒚𝒍𝒌𝒊 𝒊 𝑮𝒂̨𝒔𝒊𝒆𝒏𝒊𝒄𝒛𝒌𝒊 🦋

Kiedy ostatnio pisałam? Jakieś 3 tygodnie temu? Nie do końca już pamiętam. Zauważyłam że moje przerwy są głównie spowodowane bingem. W tym przypadku nie jest inaczej. Jest mi po prostu wstyd za siebie. Nawet dzisiaj rano wpierdoliłam całe pudło lodów, ale wreszcie mówię sobie koniec.

Dam radę.

Będę silna.

Nie dam sobie odebrać kontroli chociaż nad tym jednym aspektem.

Dla jednych może to być tylko wymówka, ale moje objadanie się niemal non stop wynikało u mnie z naprawdę MASY problemów, którymi nie chcę Was zanudzać (chyba że chcecie jednak posłuchać jak bardzo źle się u mnie dzieje od jakiegoś czasu). Mam nadzieję, że już teraz uda mi się nie zajadać stresu i wrócić do regularnych fastów.

🦋 𝑻𝒓𝒛𝒚𝒎𝒂𝒋𝒄𝒊𝒆 𝒔𝒊𝒆̨ 𝒄𝒉𝒖𝒅𝒐 🦋

[painted--smile]

⬆️⬆️⬆️⬆️⬆️⬆️⬆️

W 100% się zgadzam, mój narzeczony niemal każdego dnia powtarza mi że jestem piękna (nie zgadzam się z tym) mimo, że jestem ulaną świnią

Co jak co, ale miłość nie patrzy na wygląd 🤗

Jeszcze raz zobaczę jakieś rozjebane motylki które piszą "on mnie zostawi jak nie będę chuda" czy "mama znowu mi powiedziała że jestem za gruba", wyjebane w nich, matkę zignoruj a chłopaka w chuja zostaw. Prawda jest taka, że nieważne czy ważysz 100 kilo czy 39, jeśli ktoś traktuje cię jak gówno to żadna twoja zmiana wyglądowa tego kurwa nie zmieni.

Jak ktoś cię kocha, będziesz dla niego zawsze piękny.

[sluttybibuck]

carson the electrician joins the ranks with the christmas elf as a canon buddie warrior ✊🏼

[miyamoratsumuu]

I haven't stayed up past midnight in months???? who knew the reason I'd end up doing it again is bc of an umbrella design

[matthesoundless]

a bit overdue for another OC dump, let's go!

[firewoodfigs]

ma'am..... ma'am please may i have some more good food (a sneak peek if possible of the next chapter of a study in reformation 👀) 🥺🤲 (no pressure ofc if ur not ready to share tho MWAH ILY YOU'RE THE BEST 🩷 AND THIS AU HAS ME BY THE THROAT (UTMOST AFFECTION) 🥰🥰🥰)

FOR YOU EMMA ANYTHING!!! ilysm and I hope this brightens up your Sunday 🥰🥰🥰

here's a snippet of what is currently going on in the monstrosity of a google doc (aka the only thing I've written thus far for the next chapter with coherent grammar):

“Hello?” Riza mumbles groggily. A cursory glance at her window suggests dawn hasn’t even broken. Annoyance pricks at her as a dull ache starts in her head, but she pinches her brows and brushes it aside. If it’s spam, she’ll personally dismantle her phone. “Who is this?”  “You’re alive!” Riza groans, rolling onto her other side as she holds the phone a distance away. “We’ve been looking all over for you — where did you go? Are you okay? Are you with Roy? Are we interrupting some—“ “Rebecca,” she cuts off, as gently as she can in her sleep-addled state. “No. Before you get any wild ideas, I’m at home. In bed. Sleeping.”  “Oh.”  “Alone.”

also canon pics with zero context (but are meant to be an actual hint LOL):

[quemirabobo]

Me: *at my fucking limit*

My professor and boss: Hi! We should have a reunion so we talk about how your project is going!

Me: ( ⊙‿⊙)

[thinnestboy]

my meal. 120 cal total.

[tenth-sentence]

Occasionally, males even try to mate with dead females.

"Biological Exuberance: Animal Homosexuality and Natural Diversity" - Bruce Bagemihl

[wileys-russo]

Alessia Russo, "i want you, nobody else" at a party

prized cow II a.russo

"what about her? or him? or her? or her? or him?" you rolled your eyes at the younger girls insistent pointing, smacking her hand down and shaking your head.

"none of them?" vic gasped in shock, two drinks too many having her squinting up at you as you couldn't help but chuckle. "no shock you're single mate, standards are too high." kyra added on with a tut as you shoved her where you were stuck sat between them.

"its not them-" "-its you!" kyra and vic chimed out in sync, sharing a look and bursting out laughing causing your cheeks to heat up bright red. "shut up! i'm not that predictable. am i?" you mumbled, necking your drink as the dutch beside you patted your leg.

"you are." both of them spoke in sync again, their loud rambunctious laughter having you wince, thankfully drowned out by the thundering bass pumping in the club you'd all met up at for katies birthday.

thing one and thing two still continuing on their mission to hook you up with a stranger, something you'd long given up begging them to stop, you caught lia's eye across the room as she glanced over, giving her a pleading look which had her lips curling in amusement.

"you two!" the girls beside you fell silent as the swiss appeared, giving them a stern look and pointing her thumb behind her, how quickly vic and kyra cleared off making you grin as lia replaced them sitting beside you.

"what is wrong hm? you have been sat here all night!" lia questioned as you snaked a mouthful of her drink before she snatched it away. "i have not! i was dancing with your girlfriend and laia just ten minutes ago. the girlfriend you haven't even told half the team about!" you teased as she gave you a look.

"stop deflecting." "i am not!"

another look.

"fine. i'm just sick of everyone trying to set me up with someone, why won't they just mind their own business and leave my love life to me?" you huffed moodily, crossing one leg over the other and exhaling.

"they're just trying to help-" "i don't need help! i'm happy, i am." you pushed with a frown, lia slinging an arm over you as you sighed and leaned into her.

"i will have a word to the girls about backing off." the older girl murmured, pinching your cheek as a small smile crept back onto your face. "thank you." you gave her a side hug, a sense of relief beginning to settle in.

"besides. i already told you, ana is single!" you leapt away from the swiss with a grimace on your face. "lia!" you huffed in betrayal as she grinned, downing the last of her drink.

"only joking." she assured patting your knee and starting to stand to head over to the bar. "you are not her type anyway!" the swiss winked, disappearing to grab another drink as you shouted after her and flipped her off.

catching kyra and vic speaking to rosa you noticed all three seemed to be trying to sneak glances over to you, and not wanting to wait around and see what they were plotting you quickly stood and made a beeline toward the bathroom.

once inside you exhaled heavily, the moment the door slammed behind you the quiet that followed much needed to help you clear your head as you started toward the sink.

before you could even take another breath the door banged open again, a blonde blur zooming through and slamming it closed after herself as bright blue eyes met yours.

"hi." "hi."

you couldn't help but smile as you noticed the slight blush on her cheeks, the same you could feel creeping up the back of your neck as she stepped closer.

"i feel like i haven't seen you all night." alessia pondered, her fingers nudging yours where your arm by your side and you'd be lying if you said you didn't feel the bolts of electricity which shot up at your arm at her touch.

"i've been avoiding you." you spoke bluntly, her face falling before she noticed your grin and her eyes rolled. "hilarious." she muttered sarcastically, shoving you and smiling down at the floor as the pair of you stood side by side leant against the sink.

"has kyra been bothering you?" alessia questioned softly, and you could feel her concerned gaze pan over the side of your face but as soon as you turned to look back at her it was trained to the floor again.

"jealous?" you smiled softly, bumping your shoulder gently into hers, your fingers now brushing against hers where your hands hung side by side, pinkies slowly intertwining making butterflies flutter in your stomach.

"no!" alessia answered quickly, the two of you finally sharing a look and a grin before returning your gazes to the tiled floor as if it was the most interesting thing in the room.

"she's been trying to sell me off like a prized cow, vic too." you chuckled, the electricity bolts returning as alessia now properly took your hand in hers.

"well now i'm jealous." alessia admitted quietly though you didn't miss the way her lips curled upward. "should be, i'm worth a fair bit of money russo." you teased softly, squeezing her hand and bumping your hip into hers again.

"oh i know. who went shopping with you yesterday?" alessia challenged looking up as you scoffed. "i told you i would pay for my own stuff! but you-" you started to argue, a laugh and a pair of very familiar lips shutting you up as they pressed against yours.

"we could just tell them about us." you were again caught off guard by the words that followed, alessia's taller form caging you in against the counter you were pressed against, pulling away and speaking up.

"i thought you weren't ready yet? there's no pressure less, i know i said that stuff about kyra but-" again, cut off with pale pink lips moving against yours.

"well i've been thinking about it and we could start with just a few of our close friends, our parents have kept it hush." your girlfriend mused making you smile, her hand dropping yours as they both settled on your hips, yours winding around her neck.

"our friends mouths are much bigger than our families." you reminded with a snicker of amusement making the blonde chuckle. "well we have to start somewhere, and i think i'm ready. if you are!" alessia clarified quickly, worry flickering momentarily through her eyes as you nodded.

"i am. this is still...new, but i like it." you assured with a nod, pecking her lips twice and enjoying the way the tips of her ears reddened.

"new? babe its been two months!" alessia laughed as you rolled your eyes which flickered to the door as you thought you heard it open but it stayed closed.

"maybe, but its your first time dating a girl!" you reminded poking her nose as she rolled her eyes but nodded, unable to argue the fact that all of this had indeed been something new for the pair of you.

"well i am ready, at least for a few of the girls to know. i want you, nobody else." alessia assured as you blushed and she beamed, kissing your flushed cheeks.

"and then maybe they'll stop trying to sell you off like a prized cow." your girlfriend teased as you gasped, opening your mouth to tell her off but once more your words were swallowed by her lips locking with yours.

"you can't just kiss me to shut me up whenever you want you know?" "oh no? watch me."

[signfromeywa]

Rough concept!

My OCs Ana and Ean'tu while mating in front of Eywa 💜Now they are officialy husband and Wife, mated for life 🥰

[painted--smile]

🦋 𝑪𝒛𝒆𝒔́𝒄́ 𝑴𝒐𝒕𝒚𝒍𝒌𝒊 𝒊 𝑮𝒂̨𝒔𝒊𝒆𝒏𝒊𝒄𝒛𝒌𝒊 🦋

Wiem, że to może głupie (chociaż jeśli coś jest głupie i działa to nie jest głupie), ale w apce to śledzenia postępów w utracie wagi ustawiłam sobie, że mam 134.2 cm wzrostu. Po co?

Po to:

Teraz będzie mi się pokazywać otyłość/nadwaga do czasu, aż nie schudnę do mojego ugw (ustaliłam sobie taki wzrost, żeby 45 kg to była górna granica normy).

Nawet nie wiecie jak mnie to motywuje. Pewnie dlatego, że serio się czuję jakbym miała otyłość albo co najmniej nadwagę.

🦋 𝑻𝒓𝒛𝒚𝒎𝒂𝒋𝒄𝒊𝒆 𝒔𝒊𝒆̨ 𝒄𝒉𝒖𝒅𝒐 🦋

[mrabubu]

*comes skidding into your inbox with a pant*

okokokokokok ok

Sorry to bug ya again but Protective Casey vs Leo has been rotating in my head all day and I can’t stop giggling at it.

Hear me out:

So Red Eared Sliders will rapidly tap the face of another turtle that they’re A) Trying to Mate with or B) Trying to assert dominance against

And I can’t get the idea that the turtle part of Leo’s brain yelling at him to fight the smol child (Casey Jr.) who keeps challenging him for the affections of his mate (Ana)

Leo’s like “I’m not about to throw hands with a toddler, I am full grown adult that would never slink to such childish tactics”

And then one day Ana turns around and find Leo and Casey going at it like this

AnYhOo, feel free to tell me to scram but thought this was funny and wanted to share with the class!

I think it says a lot that I myself have been giggling the entire time while drawing this-

LOVE IT DFPISDOPFSDOPF[SDIF

[transdas0kcal]

Dicas Para Auxiliar Na Perda De Peso! ˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗

Intrudução ೀ

É de grande importância aqui na nossa comunidade ED alguns conselhos para nós ajudar às vezes, não é? Então, eu estou aqui hoje a fim de dar algumas dicas que eu e algumas pro-anas usam para emagrecer com mais rapidez.

Sempre que houver um descontrole ou compulsão, leia alguns meanspos: Parece não tão importante, mas olha, ajuda bastante. Se você se descontrolar, leia algumas palavras ruins e veja também uns thinspos, ajuda muito.

Anote: Se você tiver um descontrole ou compulsão, escreva o que você sentiu depois dela ou em um diário, ou bloco de notas, ou qualquer coisa. Quando sentir vontade de comer, sempre leia, certeza que desistirá!

Se não conseguir, diminua o tempo: Se não conseguir fazer um NF de 24h, 48h ou mais, faça um menor, tipo 16, até 12h. Tipo, se você estuda de manhã, até às 12h, se você não comer desde 00:00h, e ficar sem comer até o fim das suas aulas, já é um NF de 12h!

Quando não houver opção, coma o mais limpo possível ou a menor quantidade: Se em fins de semana seus pais ou pessoas que moram com você te fizerem comer, coma o mínimo possível! Por exemplo: uma colher de arroz, meia de feijão, um pouco de salada. Nada de se aproveitar dessas oportunidades para se encher de comida!

Em caso de seu peso acabar se estabilizando, dietas para platô: As dietas para platô são um déficit de calorias, onde um dia você consome bastante e no outro quase nada, ajuda MUITO a sair de imediato a sair do peso que se estabilizou.

Compre laxantes e diureticos: Se você comer, tome um laxante (remédio que estimula os movimentos intestinais, produzindo fezes), se beber algo, tome um diurético (remédio que estimula a necessidade de urinar). Ambos são bem baratinhos, o meu laxante eu comprei por R$ 18,99. Minhas indicações de laxante são o Lacto-purga e o Repilax, que é o que eu tomo; os que tem um efeito mais rápido são os líquidos, que tem um preço um pouco maior, porém, efetuam mais, e já de diuretico, como não uso, não sei recomendar, mas se sintam livres de comentar os que usam, até irá me ajudar!

Sempre tenha um motivo para gastar calorias: Se te pedirem para ir ao mercado, ou ao algum lugar, sempre vá! De preferência, com um relógio contador de passos ou um aplicativo que faça isso; eu uso o "Contador de Passos - Pedômetro" e acho que ele conta direitinho.

Tome chás que auxiliam no emagrecimento: Bom, eu vou listar aqui alguns chás para vocês! (Lista no final do post)

Não se pese todo dia: Se pesando todo dia você criará uma pressão em si mesmo/a sobre emagrecer (mais do que você já tem) então se pese NO MÁXIMO, JÁ ESTOURANDO 2 vezes por semana.

Quando quiserem comer algum aperitivo, veja receitas Ana: Como a sopa Ana, por exemplo. Eu postarei algumas das minhas "receitinhas" quando as fizer

Tenha aplicativos sobre: No meu post fixado, mostro alguns aplicativos que podem lhe auxiliar, como diários para marcar o peso, aplicativos de jejuns, exercícios, etc. Dê uma olhada lá e vê se gosta de algum!

Se sentir fome, tome alternativas: em jejum, se sentir fome, durma, vá se distrair, fazer uma aeróbica, andar, tudo para não comer! Também masque um chiclete e beba água, se tiver, com gás, ajuda demais a mascarar a fome!

ೀ Mega Thinspo!

ೀ² Nome dos chás!

Chá de Gengibre com Abacaxi

Chá Verde com Amora

Chá de Hibisco com Canela

Chá Mate com Limão

Chá de Feno Grego e Alcachofra

Chá de Cúrcuma com limão

Chá Preto com Laranja e Canela

Chá de Oolong

Chá de Cavalinha

Chá de Açafrão com Gengibre

Chá Vermelho

Chá Capim-Limão

Chá de Oliveira

Chá de Orégano

Chá de Dente de Leão

Chá Matcha

(Em alguma hora, farei um post sobre os ingredientes de cada)

[latinotiktok]

Propaganda:

The Magnus Archives dudes

-Martin(cho) Blackwood de The Magnus Archives. Arranco como meme en el fandom latino de TMA que era argentino por su nombre, realmente no hay mucho en la serie que banque esto, pero sería cagar a los ingleses y eso siempre está bien. Igual luego el fandom se armó alto lore de que era de Argentina y cuando su padre lo abandonó su mamá lo obligó a emigrar a Inglaterra, es re mentiroso así que la rompería jugando al truco y en general tiene todas las vibras de argento fan de los pimpinela y las novelas turcas, de boquita y el mate con don satur.

-Martín Blackwood (The Magnus Archives) es argentino y emigró a inglaterra de chiquito y yo se que esto es real porque me lo dijo Ami (@hiherami) acá: https://archiveofourown.org/works/33681655/

-Jonathan "Jon" Sims de The Magnus Archives es el archivista. Recolecta ,inicialmente contra su voluntad, el trauma supernatural de la gente. Y es un mamón <3. Es mexicano namas pq sería divertido ( la verdad no tengo tanta justificación, a mi me gusta porque soy mexicano). En la temporada 4 lo tratan bien mal y su amorcito no lo pela, el señor es la gata bajo la lluvia, es Ana Gabriel con el cigarrillo, es bandera de Porter, es Selena con no me queda más. Pedí ayuda a amigues latines aqui su propaganda: -literalmente vive del chisme (la entidad que sirve se alimenta de experiencias supernaturales que le han pasado a otras personas) y los latinos somos chismosos -"Su tipo de cansancio sólo lo encontrás en gente que ha tenido que vivir las ocurrencias de la política latinoamericana" A, y Martín Blackwood(el novio) es Argentino.

-MARTIN BLACKWOOD de The Magnus Archives (podcast). Ele é um inglês daqueles que adoram chá, mas tem muito inglês na Argentina por conta das Malvinas e seria no mínimo sensacional que parte do chá que ele tome seja Mate Na Cuia™️. Além do mais não temos muita informação sobre seu pai, e "Martin" é um nome que funciona em espanhol e inglês. Grashias por el servicio de ti blooog

-Tim Stoker de The Magnus Archives. 1. El chabón más filo y letras del podcast, conozco como tres tipos como él 2. Canónicamente bisexual need I say more? (? 3. Razón meta pero como es bi la mitad del fandom se pone bien pelotuda y lo caracteriza con todos los estereotipos habidos y por haber, que también coinciden con estereotipos y malas caracterizaciones de personajes latinos en general (lo tratan de boludo, trolo, violento etc y es tipo gente escuchamos el mismo podcast? mátense) 4. Su backstory es básicamente que al hermano lo desaparecieron y el chabón se pasó años buscando a ver qué pasó con él, a pesar de saber que probablemente murió, lo cual siempre me pegó bastante como argentino 😔 (@mods si el último punto es muy heavy para este evento más en joda siéntanse libres de dejarlo afuera u_u pero ES una de mis razones) 5. Siempre es moralmente correcto hacer q un personaje ingles sea argentino 😤

Godot

-Godot Ace Attorney. A personalidade dele é tomar café. O cara é de são paulo certeza

-godot de ace attorney. literalmente se llama diego armando. i rest my case

-No sé si cuente xq si es canon implicitamente que es latino pero Diego Armando /Godot de ace attorney , los juegos no especifican su nacionalidad específica tho

-Diego Armando, de Ace Attorney. Porque qué es mas argentino que el que tus papas te pongan el nombre de Maradona ⚽️

-godot de ace attorney. literalmente se llama diego armando. i rest my case

[yamumsyadadd]

the forgotten girl (6)

originally posted on my old account :)

As the clocked clicked closer to the time I needed to leave, the more anxious I got. This would be the first time in Barca colours and the first time on a game sheet in three and a half years.  

Keira had picked me up and taken me to the stadium, she wanted to make sure I didn’t ’run away’, the vibes in the locker room were amazing. Everyone singing and dancing, after a while they started to stop. The music got turned down and everyone started their pre game rituals. I did not have any. Never really did to be honest. I was ready after 5 minutes and decided to just watch everyone else. 

I’m not exactly sure when things started to get overwhelming, but they did. Slowly but surely my breathing increased, my heart rate too. Next was the sweaty hands and the leg bouncing. Jona had come in for the pre game talk, followed by Irene and Alexia. I tried to listen, but I couldn’t. 

“Amelia? Are you ok?” Looking up I realised everyone had left, expect for me and AMC. 

“Hmm? Oh yeah no I’m fine thanks Ana! Just taking it all in you know. I’ll meet you out there?” 

The thought of walking out there and warming up was really making me panic. So many people, so many cameras, so many questions. 

“Mil! Hey mil look at me. Focus on my breathing. You’re okay.” Alexia. 

“I- I can’t do t-this ale. I can’t.” 

“You can Mil. You belong out there. You belong on this team. You’re the best mil. Trust what I am saying.” 

It look a bit but my breathing slowly calmed down. The tears on my face were dry but my eyes were puffy, a tell tale sign I was crying. I was already exhausted and I hadn’t even stepped foot on the pitch yet. This was going to be a long day. 

“Okay, let’s go.” 

As Alexia and I walked out, the crowd cheered. Most likely for their Reina but I could hear a few people yelling out my name. She gave my arm a squeeze before we separated and started warming up. 

Before I know it, it’s time to start. I go to the bench with the rest of the bench players and the starters go into the tunnel. As they all line up, Kei sends me a smile and a wink. 

The game starts slowly, Sociedad flood their defence with players so getting a shot off is difficult. In the 13th minute Lucy sends a cross in the finds the head of Alexia and lands in the back of the net. By half time, Alexia has a hat trick, Salma has a brace and Caro has scored too. It’s 6-0 going into the break. 

True to his word, Jona subs me in at the 60th minute mark, taking Salma off. As I run into position, Keira stops me. 

“Show them how great you are.”

That was all I needed. Playing with my best mate was surreal. I felt guilty for being so happy but I wouldn’t let everyone see that. It took a few minutes to get settled into the game but once I was, it was like I never stopped. With Alexia, Keira and Aitana in the mid field, the ball was continually fed through on a silver platter. The first opportunity to score was when the Sociedad goalie had dropped the ball, it bounced away from her and I was able to capitalise. The ball hit the back of the net and the girls surrounded me. 

A few minutes before the end of the game, I was running down the left wing, Alexia slightly in front and Keira directly beside me, a dirty tackle from a Sociedad player sent me flying. One set of cleats went straight into my ankle, the other on my calf. It fucking hurt, trying to bury my face into the grass to get myself to calm down, I hear Lucy and Keira running up. Right as they get to me the Real Sociedad player screams at me. 

“It’s your fault she’s dead. Remember that. You did this.” That’s when all hell breaks loose. Before the words settle in my brain, Keira shoves her over, the player is quick to get back up, shoving Keira, then Lucy rugby tackles her to the ground. Suddenly all 21 players are fighting, the refs are doing the best they can, Irene and Marta are trying to pull Lucy up. 

“For fuck sake that’s ENOUGH.” My voice is hoarse from the silent tears. 

I gently pushed the physios off me, wincing slightly as I put pressure on it. 

“Are you calling the game?” I asked the main ref. 

“No”

“Okay, can we get on with it then?” A large amount of cards were given out. Lucy, Keira, Claudia, Patri, AMC, Mapi, Ingrid and Alexia all received one, as did 7 of the Sociedad players. What a debut. 

After 5 minutes the game ended. I left the field, not bothering to shake hands or talk to the managers. The words playing over and over in my mind. Was it my fault? Am I the reason Emily was dead? Who the fuck is that player? Breathing got harder and harder, my vision became blurry and I could feel my heart beating, it was almost painful. I needed to get out of here, to go home. 

This was all a mistake. 

I tried to hurry to pack my things up, but the blurry vision from my tears was making it difficult. I could hear loud yelling and cleats on the ground making their way to me. I knew who it would be and I didn’t want anyone to see me like this. It was all too much. 

“Mil. Mil! Amelia stop!” It wasn’t until Keira’s hand was holding my arm that I stopped. I needed to leave. 

“Get out.” No one moved, waiting in horror. “Everyone get OUT!” Alexia’s captain voice sounded through the locker room then suddenly everyone was out. It was just the three of us. 

“Talk to me Milly.”

“Did I - did I get her killed? Was it because of me that she’s dead?” 

“What! No! Amelia listen to me, none of it was your fault. What happened to Emily and to you, was not your fault. Do you understand me?” 

All I could do was nod my head. “Can I help you shower? Then I’ll take you back to mine okay?” 

“Okay” 

Keira lead me to the showers, making sure to grab my toiletries and a towel. Slowly she helped take off my clothes, asking along the way for each item. As she got to my shirt, she asked again, I nodded and squeezed my eyes shut. Only Alexia had seen the scars. I could hear her breathing hitch and sniffling. She was crying. She didn’t say anything and neither did I. After helping to wash my hair, she left me to do my body by myself. 

“Is she ok?” Irene asked, the team was slowly making their way back in. 

“No. If you could just wait a minute before you shower. She doesn’t want anyone to see her scars.” They all nodded in understanding. Not once had they seen me change, always going into the stalls. The scars were my biggest insecurity. 

“She shouldn’t be alone tonight” 

“She won’t be Ale. I will take her to mine and she’ll stay with me for a bit.” 

I was exhausted. I couldn’t stand any longer and with a thud, I landed on the floor, my Shampoo and conditioner went crashing. This caused Keira and Alexia to run in. Keira worked fast, turning off the water and helping me up, wrapping a towel around me. Alexia stood there, frozen. Eyes stuck on the scars that littered my torso. Keira looked at me, fresh tears running down my face, then back at alexia. 

“Ale, I know you want to stay but you need to get out” Keira spoke so incredibly softly to her. It was hurting them both to see me like this. I knew that but I couldn’t stop it. After she dried and dressed me, she ushered me through the locker room. Not stopping to talk to anyone or grab our bags. 

The car driving lulled me to sleep. The subtle vibration and warmth was all I needed. Kei woke me up when we got to her apartment and helped me out of the car. She held me right the entire way up, almost as if she was scared I’d break or run away. She guided me through to her room, putting me straight under the covers and climbing in the other side. She held me as I cried, whispering sweet words into my ear, after a while I fell asleep. I wouldn’t wake until morning.