#an hour is so little time
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I feel like being in therapy is a lot like watching serialized TV. I get to work through a very small chunk of the story for an hour, and then waiting to suspense for a whole another week to see where it goes.
For once, I would like to binge. Let me get through all this shit in like 12 hours and be done.
#I know that's not how it works#but I really really wish it was.#right now I'm on an emergency cancellation list with everything that's happened#and my last session was literally just catching him up on the last week since the fire#he asked what I was doing to ground myself and cope#which I do very much appreciate thinking about#nice continuation from last episode where we were talking about ways to ground myself#also I would very much like to continue with this Arc#I do need to just bring a list#I think that would be immensely helpful in keeping me from just rambling#an hour is so little time
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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again
#yeehaw#1k#5k#10k#posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference#edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense#also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags#1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now#he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic#2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use ���?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign#like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock#3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing#it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is#extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once#it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life#i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about#Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect#if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it#aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week
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I love how Gerald was trying to keep Shadow from spoiling anything about the future meanwhile literally everything Shadow says and does around Maria is the biggest death flag ever
#in fairness i’m sure both past robotniks just assumed her illness would be what killed her h a#sxsg#sxsg spoilers#sonic x shadow generations#shadow the hedgehog#maria robotnik#ark siblings#sonic#comic#my art#doodles#so this was pretty much entirely done 24 hours ago#but ironically was distracted from posting earlier by playing sxsg#and then watching snapcube play it cause her delight is addicting#i’m missing 2 chests and 2 bolts and I wanna see if I can pull it off without a guide haha#anyways now I’m thinking about the fact that maria and gerald probably went back to their time assuming maria would die of her sickness#and how that would change their respective behaviors#i bet gerald would be holding out that maria would still live a bit longer#just cause shadow inadvertently revealed he’s from at least 50 years in the future due to having met black doom before#(which rewatching cutscenes to remember this quote he Did try to play off a little bit with some sort of#‘oh what do you think the alien squid meant by ’this time i’ll beat you’ that’s so crazy’ comment)#so hey maybe it wasn’t a perfect cure but she managed to live another 10-20 years at least?#all the more reason to press harder surely!#meanwhile maria is coming to terms with her mortality at age 14 or whatever she is#frankly I bet she came to terms with it long ago the way she seems to be written#okay back to snapcube
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Also increasingly aware that a LOT of people "manage" getting through the 40+ hour work week by sleeping less than is healthy and relying on stimulants like coffee and energy drinks to keep them going.
For people who are unwilling or unable to do this...work really does just dominate your life. Like we really should not have to rely on unhealthy practices just to have a social life or keep on top of housework or whatever.
I know I post about this a lot but I'm so TIRED all the time and it's just so depressing that this is how we're expected to spend the one life we have.
#i have to get at least 8 hours of sleep a night to even barely function#with sleep#getting ready for work#commute#cooking#and errands#I typically have maybe 2-3 hours to actually do what i want in a day#and I'm usually too tired to actually do the things i want to do#and that's with a very short commute#if i actually had a long commute I'd basically do nothing but work#i see my friends like once every few weeks or months#because we're all so fucking busy with work and have such little time for socialising#and none of us even have kids or anything!!
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[Toon x Mobster] A tender moment.
[Animation timelapse here!]
[AUDIO USED:] Chet Baker - Almost Blue Sound Effects edited by me!
#toon x mobster#jack desmond#gavriel huffman#original character#original characters#original character art#oc#ocs#oc art#oc animation#oc animatic#I made a little animation about them because I was craving it#I needed to see these two being soft and very loving towards each other#HEY YOU KNOW WHAT THIS IS REMINDING ME#it's like one of those videos back in the early internet years with fandom characters being animated by fans kissing each other HAHAHA#2012 aesthetic <3 two anime/game characters being animated kissing and everyone either screaming from loving or hating it#ooohh those were fun times..#again. I had so much fun with the sound effects [YAAYY I MADE THEM REAL ARE YOU SEEING THAT I DID THAT]#I'm so proud of myself [took literal hours browsing through sound effects with tears slowly sliding down my face]
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Man is it just me or are a lot of TV shows nowadays are written to have big emotional episodes in scenes with very little build up.
#txt#i have some thoughts on a certain show.... maybe i'll talk about it lol#like you would think with shortened seasons these writers would try to limit the cast so that big scenes feel more earned... but they dont?#they want these big massive expansive casts with big emotional moments by episode 2 and then every episode needs that Big Scene#i noticed this especially with a lot of indie animated shows#pacing and build up is sacrificed so we can have big emotional scenes with characters we know very little#even indie shows i enjoy im just kind of like “wouldnt this feel more earned if i actually knew this character”#and sometimes it works. pluto made me cry in the first episode! but it also spent so much time with these characters because#they're an hour long each
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Learning to celebrate the little wins!
#fersona#While I don't have the capacity to do Hourly Comics Day#I did journal my day hour-by-hour and the sheer difference in my self-care and routines is *staggering*.#Honestly both Feb 1 2024 and 2025 were rough days...but this year I had a far better outlook on it all.#The funny part is that when I drew this a few days ago I actually *was* celebrating not crying.#Might have still cried on Feb 1st. A meagre 4 times. But I also had lot of good moments!#January is a very hard month for me and frankly I've been in a fugue state for most of it.#Drawing helped me pull through these last 2 years but this year I've been finding myself so upset at how I can't seem to focus anymore.#So updates and posts have been slow. I'm just slow. I'm tired and burnt out from work and grieving.#But you know what? The days I do manage to post; I'm never shamed for how long it took. You're all just as excited and kind.#I'm coming home and eating better and sleeping more and spending time with loved ones.#This is all to say; you can be a lot happier when you realize that life can be taken a little slower.#I'm more grateful that words can possibly convey.#If you related to the mindset of constantly feeling like you've 'failed' the day; please know you have done more than you realize.#I'm struggling with it everyday! I'm in the trenches with you!#Life is too short and painful to not celebrate what you *do* accomplish! It's hard work but it is worth it!#Bit by bit...we will learn to live. *Really* live. And enjoy it!
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summer of junior year 06/11
#dimension 20#fantasy high junior year#fhjy#gorgug thistlespring#riz gukgak#kristen applebees#figueroth faeth#fabian seacaster#adaine abernant#the bad kids#this is like. the First time I put down a palette for the kids lmao#I thiiiink its pretty consistent with the tones I did with my early sketches? iirc#gods. Ive been staring at this for Hours. I need to sleep lol#summer... it is happening. I feel like that always brings with it big emotions for me#it is. a little bit funny to me that whether these kids get a peaceful summer or not depends fully on how many roll20 campaigns happen#between now and a definitive end/last season of fh lmao#but also the last ''summer'' movie I watched was uhhh summer of 84. which. mmmmm#grim affair! so I'd need to stock up on less gloomy stuff to even think abt this...#well. what I need right now is sleep. so sleep I shall. thank u for tuning in today. see u again I think
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I see a lot of fics n such where the parents are taking care of the trio when they’re ill but I propose the alternative…
#sonic movie#tom wachowski#maddie wachowski#sonic wachowski#tails wachowski#knuckles wachowski#knuckles the echidna#miles tails prower#it’s about the joys of parenthood and having the little ones come back to help you in a time of need#letting you know that you’ve done a good job despite feeling like you have no idea what you’re doing#they love you anyway#gets me ya know#sonic the hedgehog#I’m coming down with a cold so naturally I project it onto the current blorbos of the hour#sth#scu
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out of the frying pan and into the fire and into another frying pan that's also on fire
[id in alt text]
#dungeon meshi#dungeon meshi spoilers#dunmeshi#this past year i decided to get into some of the manga i hear people really rave about#and dunmeshi was the first one i read and i adore it so much i don't have the words#gosh ryoko kui is such a huge inspiration.. i hope i can save up and get physical copies of the manga some day#ohh and daydream hour if it ever releases in english...#and sorry toshiro doesn't have his armor. i always remember him in his disheveled casual arc#fan art#my art#i think i've just completely stopped trying to do a clean flat style... i've just started painting over my sketches now#it looks a little messy but it's so much more fun#this was the first time in awhile i looked forward to continuing a drawing
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practicing self care (projecting my stims on my blorbos)
greyscale vers below the cut!
#marshdoodles#isat#in stars and time#writing these tags like. an hour before posting. it’s 1 am rn#i do that little kieran pokemon hip tap sometimes so bonnie gets to do it too#they’re a kid!! they have a lot of energy!!!!!#i realize these are the first proper drawings of isa and mira ive posted here#i’ve drawn them before but they’re from like. May. and i’ve improved since then#so i don’t. really feel like posting those#idk. maybe one day i’ll say fuck it and drop that doodle page
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yes, I've watched the video. now this man is my new hyperfixation. expect more art of him soon I suppose.
#maskerat art#turbo#turbo wir#wir turbo#turbo tastic#turbotastic#turbotime#wreck it ralph turbo#turbo wreck it ralph#may i just say the video was such perfect enrichment for my stupid autistic brain#i swear i analyse every content i watch/consume but sadly am restricted most of the time#so watching a 2 hour vid about some disney villain having all the little details#made me rlly happy and content 👍#digital art#illustration#but NOW im horribly hyperfixed on this idiotic man#i dont know what i see in him lmfao
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these two are so interesting to me
characters belong to @canisalbus
#clenches fists. im so sosososo normal about them. i think about them a normal amount (lying)#actually the 2nd image is based on some sort of anime couple pose template(?????) that i saw a while back and wanted to draw them in it#but i swear to god i CANNOT FUCKING FIND IT. i was literally knee deep in yuri and yaoi fanart for hours trying to find that god damn photo#but i dont even know who the characters were and pinterest just shows me bakugou and deku making out sloppy style whenever i try#so i gave up an tried drawing it from memory and cried the whole time. i hate anatomy.. but they look so happy so its fine#god whenever i see Lore or sweet little tidbits for these two i want to tear into something with my teeth and throw something /pos#i genuinely want to study these gay little renaissance dogs under a microscope#what fucks me up is the fact that we all know it ends horribly but u cant help loving them anyway.. they are so. incoherent hand gestures#my art#myart#others ocs#vasco#machete#vaschete#furry art#fur#anthro
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―I used to know two people, and your eyes reminded me of theirs. What happened to them? They disappeared.
Link Click: Bridon Arc · S3EP1
#时光代理人#shi guang dai li ren#link click#linkclicknet#time agents#anisource#dailyanimatedgifs#animangahive#fyanimegifs#dailyanime#linkclickedit#animeedit#donghua#anime#chinese animation#chinese anime#*4#s3ep1#cheng xiaoshi#lu guang#this entire episode from beginning to end is 1 hour long pain and crying stop it get some help 🤗#what is this supposed to mean????!!!? helppppp why is this doom is the 2 people xiaoshi's parents????#i tweaked the translations ever so slightly to fit the original just a little bit more
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these fuckass robots that I hate /aff (Ultrakill x PHIGHTING!)
the girls are PHIGHTING! again
#WOOOBOY was this a pain in my ASS to make#I had to remake the Wip for it like 3 times because I kept hating how it was coming out#And this beast actually took 11 hours in itself#Was it worth it? I would say so!#Even though it did take a LONGGGG time I feel like I improved A LOT with it#My robot anatomy/my ability to only work with two colors and mimic the ultrakill album style really has improved a bunch :3!#There’s also a lot of fun little parallels and bits I hid in this as well#If you can spot them all props to you :3!#Also yeah I hope we can all agree that this is the most unfair fucking fight of a lifetime#V1 would win hands down LMAOOOOOOOO#ANYWAYS tag time!#artists on tumblr#phighting#phighting fanart#roblox phighting#phighting art#phighting roblox#roblox#phighting!#digital art#art#ultrakill#ultrakill fanart#ultrakill v1#v1 ultrakill#v1 fanart#ultrakill art#fan art#artwork#my art
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Little practice animation to satisfy some brainrot
#i may be just a little abnormal about anxiety inside out 2#I can't defend how many hours this took to make#learned a ton tho! learning more and more about comping in toonboom that's gonna save so much time w future animation#colour selector node goes HARD#inside out 2#anxiety#pixar#animation#my art
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