#am rambles

[hate-letmetellyou]

My prisoners have gotten to the point where they roll their eyes when I compare them to food in my belly. So today I likened the situation to a pregnancy and Ted immediately vomited.

I'm knitting you a onesie, Ted...

[crystalsamethyst]

Me? Thinking about pregnant Hua Cheng? It's more likely than you'd think.

[analogwriting]

obviously im alive now. lemme tell you, that clopen into a 16 hour shift led me to not sleep for 36 hours. and some other crazy fuck shit happened. but it's all fine now lmao. back to a regularly scheduled program. (that's the joke. there's no schedule. just my own impatient ass posting whenever I want)

[hate-letmetellyou]

"smart printers are also morally evil" hold my beer

stumbled across some of my printer opinions that i don't recall writing but am correct about

[goldensunset]

you! tumblr user!

[anishenanigans]

they're adding new pvp features to pinterest

[sapphicdib]

tumblr is the worst designed website on the fucking planet bro

[radioroxx]

[rovermcfly]

proud to say that I have never once in my life figured out the whodunit in any crime story I've read or watched. I just let the facts and clues wash over me, absorbing absolutely none of it. I am the audience they think of when they throw in red herrings, in case you've ever wondered "who would fall for this obvious false lead". it's me. I am the idiot viewer/reader. not once has an obviously framed clue revealed anything to me. my head is completely empty when I consume these stories.

[lazylittledragon]

can't believe we're all adults being forced into the club penguin level of censorship in 2024

[nikoisme]

fucking hate how cats think they can mrrp their way out of anything because yeah, they fucking can.

[hate-letmetellyou]

Benny I know you want a tail, but that's just an extra limb I have to paralyze when we play Operation on you. Not to mention an advantage in Twister. I know you don't want to ruin family game night.

[crystalsamethyst]

Ugh having pre-canon Fenglian thoughts with some headcanons involved...

But like from Feng Xin's POV, there's a person you are protecting and you end up loving them so much too but you know he's not and will never be yours because of many, many reasons, but you sometimes imagine maybe one day you'll just like run away together and idk hunt and stuff, you're both just so good at fighting, you don't even know WHY he has a guard since you've never even been able to beat him in a fight and you've never seen him lose against anyone else.

Before you even work up the courage to say anything about it after you've both worked so hard for years and years to achieve his dream and fill your life's purpose, a war happens, and then you see his dreams shatter, and it breaks your heart to see him so badly, and there's even more of an impossibility for the both of you. So you take comfort in one of the few people from old Xianle that isn't trying to kill you, and she gives you something close to what you wanted to feel, and it's a betrayal in your heart but at least it's nice.

And then something happens while you're gone so often. Every time you return, your main love is more and more different, and then disappears completely leaving you to take care of his parents. The other love dumps you for some reason. You're hurting. But you stay and take care of the prince's family because you're hoping he'll come back, and maybe then you can talk about things.

He does eventually come back, but completely changed and angry, and he demands you leave. You feel like it's from the bottom of his heart, and so you do. You really can't take the heartbreak. Maybe you'll return in a while, but when you do, the house is abandoned with horrifying context clues.

Then you see him again 800 years later and he's back to the kind person you knew, but it's awkward the way things were left, and you want to help him so you hide yourself. And it turns out he'd rather be frolicking with someone who's tormented you for centuries than trust your judgement.

And then they're in love and happy and you're happy for him but it also tears you up inside. If you'd said something back then, before the war, would he have chosen you instead? Were you ever as important? Could you have been?

[midnight-coffee94]

No single line has ever wrecked me as hard as this one from the Good Place and I think about it constantly

[maythedreadwolftakeyou]

Viago, when playing as Rook De Riva: you IDIOT you were my favorite fledgling why did you have to make a mess of this now I have to jump through all these convoluted hoops to keep you safe. Teia stop telling Rook how much I missed them it's not funny they could have DIED. also your room is exactly the way you left it please come home

Strife, when playing as Rook Aldwir: Why hasn't this weird bug i kicked out of our camp ages ago died yet :|

[adrianfridge]

Height gap romance except the shorter one is frequently depicted in situations where they are contextually taller. The taller one sitting while the shorter one looms over them. Both of them lying in bed with the taller one’s head pressed to the shorter one’s chest. The shorter one straddling the taller one’s lap and leaning down for a kiss. The taller one on their knees as the shorter one tilts their head up. Please, it makes me go feral