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Chocolate Mint

Wherein the Drifter and Eris Morn inspect the Drifter’s garden after dinner.

Link to Ao3 if you prefer to read it there

*** Content Warning: Mature language, sexual topics *** (They keep their clothes on but they do discuss sexual topics and sex with each other in the immediate future.)

“Rub the leaves then smell your fingertips. They got oils on them and just a little rub lets them free.”

“Hmmm…”

“Peppermint. Spearmint. Lemon mint. And our plant of the hour, chocolate mint.”

“Where did you find them?”

“The ground, mostly.”

She smirked.

“Mint grows all over the place on Earth. Most of my plants are just shit I picked up. Sometimes gardens from ruined settlements. Sometimes wild. The chocolate mint is recent though. I got it from a market in the city. Someone was selling plants and I thought it might make nice tea for ya, seen as it’s not sweet but still has that smell. Like a dessert but none of the lies in your mouth.”

“It lies in the nose instead.”

“Is it really lies, though, if it’s just being what it is?”

She slid her arm around his waist and held him close.

“You’re right. It’s not lies. Just filled with contradictions.” She smiled at him over her mug. “I do like it.”

“Figured you would. That’s why I got it. Do you want some? Like the live kind? I can sprout one for you easy.”

“It would die under my care, I am sure.”

“I mean… might be a good excuse to let me visit ya on the moon more often, keep it alive, if you wanted.”

“Hmmm…”

“This here.” He pulled off a tiny leaf from a small bush of tiny leaves and held it under her nose for her to smell.

She cocked her head as she inhaled.

“This is thyme, which was in your dinner tonight. And this,” he pulled off a much larger leaf from a bright green plant,” is basil, which were the bigger green leaves in the sauce.”

She smiled, rubbing the leaf in her fingers while smelling it. “This one smells especially good.”

“Basil’s a workhorse. Goes in lotsa things. Good on a sandwich too.”

Eris detangled herself from him and walked over to a different shelf covered in plants and poked a fuzzy leaf.

“That’s a tomato,” he explained. “And this mess of vines is cucumbers, which is the thing those pickles you like so much are before I turn them into pickles. Watch out though… cucumbers are mean little bastards. They got spines.”

“They also have little ropes that spiral.”

“Yup. Cucumbers climb. Slowly of course. That’s why they have that net there. So they can climb it.”

“Are these also cucumbers?”

“Nope, those are beans. They also climb. They’re not spikey though. Beans will strangle other plants. Wrap those little tendrils around the other plants’ stems till the top just pinches off like a garotte slicin’ their little plant necks open, but they at least have the decency not to make you bleed when you pick ‘em with yer bare hands.”

“Hmmm…”

“Plants are violent fuckers. Any time you see plants out in nature, lookin’ all peaceful-like, that’s a war going on. They’re fightin’ each other for their survival at all times, just real slow.”

“And yet they don’t have to fight here. You’ve given them peace.”

“They still will kill each other if ya don’t keep an eye on ‘em. Just not quickly.”

“Are the lights timed?”

“Yup. Sixteen hours on, eight hours off.”

“Do you water them?”

“I’ve got that on automatic. Runs under the dirt.”

“Don’t they need insects for pollination?”

“Every once in a while I manage to get some bees or something going but they always die off. I’m still working on that. Don't have any right now. I mostly use a paint brush to brush the flowers.”

“You paint the flowers.”

“Yeah. Plant fucking. Some of ‘em can fuck themselves, but most of the ones with flowers need some assistance.” He held out a small paintbrush. “Behold the instrument of plant fuckery. The plant dildo, if you will.”

He reached out and brushed the tip of her nose.

Eris smirked. “So crude.”

“Not as crude as ‘cum on my thighs.’ You do realize that based on my previous and varied professions, you have literally made a sailor blush.”

She put her mug down and put her arms around his waist, pulling him close. “I can appreciate crude in certain circumstances.”

“Clearly,” He put his own mug down next to the beans. “You love me.”

“I do.” She pulled him into a long slow kiss.

“Mmmm… You know what we should do?” He whispered after a few minutes, kissing her neck.

“Hmmm?”

“We should go camping.”

“Camping?”

“Yeah. Like Europa, only not freezing fucking cold, and not needin’ to fight off patrols of Vex and Fallen every few hours.”

“Now?”

“We could stay here tonight, get some supplies in the morning, be out there by afternoon. Make a nice fire. Pitch a tent. Bring some fishing poles and a cast iron pan. Kettle for your tea. Stay a few days. Ikora could spare you for a few days, right?”

“Hmmm…”

“Come on… now’s the time, right? When’s the last time Eris Morn got a vacation? You could bring some books. I got a folding table and chairs. You can read in the sunshine by the lake. We can snuggle by the fire under the stars. Lots of tea.”

“That does sound appealing. I owe Ikora a report though.”

“You can write it while we’re there. Bring a data pad or hive leather or whatever you wanna write your report on.”

“Hmmm… would you consent to letting Ikora know where we’re going? She will worry.”

“Yeah but then she’s gonna spy on us. I don’t think you want anyone hearing the noises I’m intending on gettin’ you to make.”

“I’m sure we could arrange something less invasive,” she whispered between kisses.

“We can stop by her office in the morning when we’re on our way out, does that work? But we are going, right? You’ll come camping with me?”

“Mmmhmm…” She nodded through a kiss.

“Do you… actually… want me to cum on your thighs? That do something for you? Cuz if that does something for you…” He twisted her hips back and forth.

She laughed. “No, not especially. There are… other things I’d prefer.”

“Such as?”

“Us both having fewer clothes would be a good start.”

“Here with the plants? The potatoes have eyes you know,” he said conspiratorially, “Bed might be more comfy. Unless you are enticed by the vegetables in some way.” He winked playfully.

“I’m enticed by you.” She pulled him closer.

“Even with a candle in a soup can?” It was only there for a moment, but for just a moment his confidence slipped, his eyes pleaded for acceptance, and she realized he was holding his breath.

“Yes.” She kissed his lips softly. “Even though you only have a candle in a soup can, you made a candle-lit dinner for me, and you made me something that hasn’t been made in a thousand years, from memories that are precious and painful, and every bit of it suffused with affection and care.”

His nose brushed against hers. “That was the idea, yeah.”

She reached a hand up to caress his face. “For someone with as many layers and masks as yourself, there is such exquisite beauty in the naked honesty with which you love me.”

He turned his face and kissed the palm of her hand. “Speakin’ of… let’s take off some of these layers, shall we?”

This is part 2 of 3 in Dinner for Two. However please do be advised that part 3 will reference happy fun sexy times which occur "off screen." This is not an explicit story series but they do end up being sweet and cute and naked together. Anything straying into actual depictions of happy fun naked sexy times will remain on Ao3 where you need to click past an age verification and agree you want to read that content, as well as include tags so you can know exactly what the story contains before reading, if you so choose.

#destiny 2 #drifteris #eris morn #the drifter #the drifter/eris morn #drifter/eris #ao3 #fanfiction #writing #chocolate mint #dinner for two series #imonthemoonitsmadeofcheese #spicy #cs member writing

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imonthemoonitsmadeofcheese · 1 day ago

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Secret Food

Eris and the Drifter. Dinner for two.

Link to Ao3 if you prefer to read it there

*** Content Warning: Mature language - sex jokes ***

“I have never in all my lives tasted something this good.”

The Drifter’s eyes gleamed with pride while he was chewing, watching her from across the table in the galley of the Derelict.

“It is so good,” she mumbled, her mouth full.

“Way too early for me to be pulling out something like this for ya… but this is a special occasion so something special had to be made and, well, this is the most special thing I know.”

“I did not expect to be this impressed.”

“It’s pretty good, not gonna lie. This one’s a show stopper.”

“What is it called?”

The Drifter blinked and swallowed.

Eris tilted her head.

“The dish I’ve made for you tonight,” he smirked while reaching across the table to wipe a tiny bit of sauce from her chin and then lick his finger, “is composed of chicken, in a cream sauce, with sun dried tomatoes, red pepper flakes, parmesan cheese, basil, garlic, and thyme… the plant, not… how long it took to make.”

“Hmmm…”

“I put it on top of linguini, which is just the name of this noodle,” he held one up on his fork as an example, “that’s halfway between spaghetti, which is the round one, and fettuccine, which is the flat one. Although both of those are good too, hell any noodles or rice or just about anything is fine under this. It’s pretty great.” He returned to twirling his noodles in his fork.

“Hmmm…”

“What?”

“I asked you what it was called and you told me the ingredients.”

He paused, the food on his fork held mid-air. He put the fork down and took a sip of water.

“Has anyone ever told you that your level of attention to detail is frightening?”

“What are you hiding from me, Rat?” Eris prepared another mouthful of food on her fork. “Are you… blushing?”

“Feels like it, yup. Probably am.” He nodded.

“Is it named something excessively lewd and inappropriate?”

He shook his head and took another sip from his glass.

She studied her plate. “Chicken thighs in a cream sauce... cum on my thighs?”

He started coughing as water went up his nose.

“Dammit.” He took a few moments to breathe. “No, it is not.” He laughed. “Where the hell did that come from, Moondust? Damn!”

Eris continued eating, her face impassive. “Were you under the impression that my command of language only extended to words of more than three syllables?”

“Holy shit, Eris,” His face was red. “This is not how I thought this dinner was gonna go.”

"Hmmm… you are disappointed."

"Nope. Didn't say that. Don't feel that. Just surprised as all hell at what just came out of your mouth."

"Hmmm…"

"Cum on my thighs," he whispered, still baffled, shaking his head.

"Your request will be taken under consideration."

"Now you're just fucking with me."

"We should at least finish dinner first."

The Drifter coughed, laughing so hard tears were coming out of his eyes.

"Dammit, Moondust, I was tryin' for romantic here. This is our first actual legit date. And you just got back from takin’ out two gods and bein’ the most powerful hive that ever hived. It’s supposed to be a celebration. I even got us a candle and everything."

Eris looked over at the single candle sputtering to itself in a metal can on the table between them.

“I mean yeah, it’s in a soup can, but it's still a candle. That makes this a candle-lit dinner for two. By definition, as you so like to say. "

Eris smiled. "Yes, it is. And I do like it."

"Do you?"

"Yes."

She reached out and took his free hand, twining her fingers between his.

"So, what is the name of this dish that is not…” She broke off as he looked away. “That… actually offends you.”

He sighed. “A little, yeah. Not you talkin’ like that, that’s hilarious. Please do that more. Just… not about this.”

She rubbed her thumb against the side of his hand.

“I’m sorry. You made something very special to you and in my attempts at humour I’ve ruined the mood completely. Please forgive me.”

"You’re forgiven, but… I’m not comfortable sharing the name of this particular dish with you and I am asking you to please accept that and respect that I am keeping this one from you.”

“Because of what I said?”

“Nope, not related.”

“Hmmm…a secret food, then.” She continued eating with one hand while holding his hand in the other.

“Yeah. A secret food.”

“You’ve fed me a secret food, won’t tell me the name of it, although you freely give me the ingredients, you blush deeply when I ask, and it isn’t something horrifically crass. It is in fact the opposite… very special to you. Extremely so. Deeply personal.” She squeezed his hand.

“Yeah.”

“What a fascinating puzzle.”

“Uh oh. Moondust, I want you to promise me something.”

“Hmmm…?”

“Promise me you won’t go looking this up. It’s an old, old recipe. Pre-golden age. Anyone who knows about it is long dead by at least a thousand years. There’s no way in hell you’d find it. But now I’m actually concerned. You are like a fish in water in a library and if anyone could determine what it is, it would be you. Will you promise me? Please?”

She smiled, chewing slowly, looking away for a moment, enjoying his discomfort, before returning her gaze to him and lifting his hand to her lips, kissing one of his knuckles and swallowing her mouthful of noodles and chicken.

“I promise I will not research the name of your secret food. But, does this mean I do not get to eat it ever again? It’s so good. It was never my intention to insult it or you.”

“I’ll make it for you again.” He gave her hand a squeeze and let go. “I know it’s good. I’ll make it for you lots. As long as you don’t call it… that. And again, I ain’t complaining ‘bout you talking like that, just the application to this dish, specifically.”

“And will I ever get to know the name?”

“Ha!” He laughed nervously. “I uh… I don’t know. Um…" His eyes briefly unfocused. “Maybe?” he whispered. “Didn’t think I’d ever share this with anyone and here I am sharing it with you, so…” His eyes refocused and he looked at her like he was trying to calculate something. “Maybe.” He said the word softly, like a prayer.

“Hmmm…” She rested her chin on her hand, observing him as she ate.

“Tell ya what.” He poked the air between them with his fork. “Ask me again in… a hundred years… and we’ll see where we’re at, ok?” He returned his fork to the chicken.

“A hundred years.” She said incredulously.

“Yeah… at that point if I’m still feeding you this, you’re entitled to know the name of it.” He grinned at her and ate another forkfull.

“You really mean I cannot research this for a hundred years.”

“Yup. You promised.”

“We could die at any point before then.”

“Fine, if we’re about to die I’ll tell you the name of it then too.”

“What if I find out by accident?”

“You won’t.”

“How did you find out what it is and what it’s called if everyone who has ever made it is long dead?”

“A farmer taught it to me. His father taught it to him, and his father before him. It’s… a family recipe… and for a while that family had unofficially adopted me as one of their own.”

She drew in a sharp breath. “It was them.”

“Yeah.” He looked down at his food. “It was them.”

“I feel terrible now. Have you never shared this with anyone else?”

“No one.” He looked up into her eyes. “Only you.”

“I am… honoured.”

“Yeah, I guess it is a bit of an honour thing.”

“You don’t do honour.” She shifted her voice to match his cadence. “That sorta shit gets you killed.”

He laughed. “Well, apparently in this one specific case, I do. And also, that’s real cute, what you did just now. You should do that more too.”

“But I have made you regret sharing it with me.” Her voice was tinged in sadness.

“I… no… you have not. Not one bit. Ain’t no one else I’d want to share this with. Very grateful you’re here sharing it with me now. This is a happy thing. No amount of random, unexpected, fuckin’ hysterical, cussin’ from your oh so sophisticated mouth is gonna change that.”

She smiled again. “I didn’t know honour could taste so good.”

“It really is tasty. That’s… why it’s called what it’s called. Gimme your plate?” He stood with his empty metal plate and fork in one hand.

“Hmmm… sadly, yes.” She placed her fork on her empty plate and passed it to him.

“I will make it for ya again, I promise,” he said, taking their plates to the sink. "Felt real good to make it for you. What’s that word, cathartic? It felt right. Safe, even, if that makes any sense.” He looked back at her. “Tea?”

“Yes.”

“I got a special one for you to try, and a backup if you don’t like it. Chocolate mint.”

She wrinkled her nose.

“But before you go judging it, it’s not sweet, not at all.”

“I am willing to try it, although chocolate does not sound like it belongs in tea.”

“The chocolate isn’t added to the tea. The plant the tea is made from is called chocolate mint. Ain’t no actual chocolate involved.”

“Really.”

“Yup. Mint is fuckin’ weird like that. Oodles of different kinds.”

“Oodles.” She spoke the word as though she were rolling it around on her tongue.

“Oodles. And it’s super aggressive, for a plant anyway, so I have to keep it in its own box on its own shelf or it just takes over everything… slowly of course, cuz it’s a plant. Grows over top of the other plants to steal their light. Mint is vicious. Doesn’t play nice with others. I like it.” He handed her a steaming mug and sat back down across from her.

“It smells like candy.”

“Yup. Nothing in it though. No sugar, no honey. Just dried leaves and water. I put milk in mine. Cuts the bite. Not in yours, though.” His eyes glittered. “You like stuff that bites.”

“Hmmm…” She smiled and took a sip.

“You can try mine if you want to know how it is when it’s more creamy-like.”

“No. I like it as it is, without alteration.”

“Thought you might.”

“And it just… grows… like this…”

“Yup. Wanna see it? I can give you the plant tour. It ain’t long.”

“Yes.”

He stood up and held out his hand. She took it and laced her fingers between his. Mugs in their other opposite hands, they walked through the doorway together.

This is part 1 of 3 in Dinner for Two. However please do be advised that part 3 will reference happy fun sexy times which occur "off screen." This is not an explicit story series but they do end up being sweet and cute and naked together. Anything straying into actual depictions of happy fun naked sexy times will remain on Ao3 where you need to click past an age verification and agree you want to read that content, as well as include tags so you can know exactly what the story contains before reading, if you so choose.

#destiny 2 #drifteris #moonrat #eris morn #the drifter #the drifter/eris morn #drifter/eris #ao3 #fanfiction #writing #secret food #dinner for two series #imonthemoonitsmadeofcheese #cs member writing #spicy

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