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#am a little confused but im having a good time
pjsk-headcanons · 3 days
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How did (some) characters find out they're gay
Ichika: in middle school, she listened to Magnet. Really. She was like "wait i can do that?" Then looked at Saki (since this is middle school) and her brain exploded.
Saki: she kind of. Always grew up talking about marrying girls and thought it was normal also until middle school when one day she just started thinking about it and went "oh. Yeah that makes sense" and kept going with her life, probably the first in leo/need to figure it out.
Honami: it was in high school because Saki kept flirting and the rest of leo/need just looked too damn gorgeous and she went through a whole crisis before reaching acceptance in like 30 minutes.
Minori: Haruka. Thats all.
Haruka: in middle school, Haruka wanted to figure out if she's gay so An had an idea, they could kiss, so Haruka would think of her feelings and realize them. So they kissed, Haruka thought it was nice but didn't have much more feelings about it so she thought she was straight. Years later she met Minori and oh, she was a fool.
Shizuku: she was too busy trying to make Shiho come out that she never really thought about herself, she knows it in some way but she never thought about it and never will, it'll take her like 2 years dating Airi for Airi to call them both lesbians and Shizuku stops like "wait I am? Wait wanting to kiss you is not normal??" (I know Shizuku is smart but come on she's an airhead + this is for funnies)
Kohane: An smiled at her the first time and I think her brain exploded in purple, blue and pink (bi) glitter. "Dads im bi" "SHE'S NOT STRAIGHT IM SO HAPPY" (i stole someone's headcanon with her having two dads sorry)
An: she spent half of her childhood saying she'd marry Nagi, and her street usually had a pride parade every june, so she just. Kind of always grew up knowing she liked girls? The shock was her finding out she's bi in high school.
Akito: a few weeks after meeting Toya he's just sitting on his room thinking about how cute the boy is and how his hand is so soft and how- oh shit Ena would make so much fun of him if she knew (she knew before he did).
Tsukasa: the boy has yet to figure it out, despite Saki trying to say he's gay every day. Give him a few more years. Or a Rui kiss. Both works.
Nene: somewhere in high school she looked at Emu, looked at Ichika, thought back on her little mermaid obsession with the actress and went ".. oh. oh"
Rui: probably kind of always knew, but he did have a time where he got confused bc he dated Mizuki for some time in middle school but then Mizuki came out as trans so he was like "... What if i only like girls and just had a really good radar?" Nah. He's just bi/pan
Mafuyu: once as a kid she mentioned she wanted to marry her elementary school best friend and Mafumom started talking about dishonor and that she cant and blablabla so she just locked that up. When Mizuki and Ena said something about liking girls and Mafuyu looked around at the feelings the three girls give her she just. remembered everything, both the feelings for that friend and her mom's talk. She started having a panic attack then because one girl was bad but THREE??
Mizuki: always knew she liked girls so it took the transition to call herself gay. However Rui did make her realize she also likes boys.
-anon anon
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dandelionlwt · 1 month
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I may be stupid bottom text
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whyyyyy are dog people so obsessed with their pet taking a shit...
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permanentreverie · 6 months
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#ok so mini rant session#i am doing a bit better today - little less distraught over getting fired from a job i thought i was doing pretty good at and i was trying#really hard and genuinely enjoying#and just more baffled because truly i had no warning and i was completely blindsided#i was in the middle of a 3 month trial and i would have a review at the end in which i would be offered a permanent position if it went well#and i thought i was making my way towards that! granted i was still making mistakes but genuinely not of such a great scale i thought it#called for my immediate dismissal#that being said i was still VERY MUCH IN TRAINING. i had only been there A MONTH AND A HALF learning COMPLETELY NEW SYSTEMS#and i was told that i had been there a few weeks already and that i wasn’t catching on quick enough. that there were some areas i was#understanding and others i just simply wasn’t#and i asked what areas specifically so that i could learn more and try harder#and they didn’t give me a specific answer.#ok and so. so. i have this insecurity.#that at first impression people will like me. that they may think i’m pretty or kind or funny or whatever#but then they spend time with me or get to know me and realize that that’s all bullshit.#that i’m actually not pretty and im mean and loud and selfish and lazy and rude and etc etc etc#MASSIVE fucking insecurity in that like that’s why i genuinely don’t have friends or a significant other#and that genuinely i’m just a Bad Person#and when i was fired? i was told ‘a persons true colours show after a few weeks’#so that’s MAJORLY fucking me up.#when i was hired i was boasted to about my boss’s hiring process and how she’s ’only been fooled twice’#and the morning before i was fired in a meeting my supervisor told everyone that i was doing quite well.#so yeah i truly had no fucking warning. at fucking all.#hurt and confused and angry and baffled and did i mention hurt#anyways if you’re still here i’m sorry i know this is not a good look for me
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sporesgalaxy · 1 year
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i shouldve played pokemon violet in spanish....
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girlcrushau · 6 months
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#me? about to use tumblr as a diary again? in 2024? unfortunately:/#but here have a waterfall i saw on a hike last week as payment#i am sO tired and exhausted emotionally after dating#there's this guy that i fr thought was going to last and be around for a long time. we spent like every moment together that we could for 2#months straight and if we werent physicaly together we were texting or calling or on ft . just every part of our day had the other in it#not once did i ever feel unwanted undesired or uncared for. not once did i feel that i wasnt sure of his intentions. i felt safer with him#in those 2 months than i ever did with any one else i could think to compare to.#until one day he just didnt think it important to communicate any more. after 3 days of nearly nothing .. hardly any talking . i asked if#he was ok if we were ok. what was going on in his head. he said some ive just been with my buddies and family and havent been on my phone#and just. immediately thats heartbreak yanno. thats :// thats what they say when theres a new girl. but there'd never been a reason to think#there was another girl so i was like ok we're gonna trust bc this dude has been So good in every way. so i said imy but i understand. enjoy#your time with your buddies and with your fam -- i cant wait to hear about it (and hold you)#and i havent heard from him in the 3 weeks since. just randomly#so last night#i send the dreaded 'i miss you' text.#i dont expect to hear back and i accept the hurt that will come with that and the confusion that i've felt settles deeper into my heart#until this afternoon i hop on ig and see a hard launch that was posted an hour after my text was sent#that shit kinda hurt different. but also sent me into a bit of a delirious state where all i could do is laugh bc are you for fucking real#did she see my message? i know it. bc i know him and i know that he wouldnt hide anything from the person he's giving his heart#and his softness to. i can almost imagine how he showed her and promised her theres nothing to worry about#and there really isnt anything to worry about because he genuinely is the type to give his all to the relationship he's in#which feels silly to say after what happened w us. like no there wasnt a title ever#it sucks to call it a situationship because a month ago we were laughing in bed together about how we could never bc we were all in.#just the timing of the hard launch makes me giggle. did my text push them to have a conversation about what they are. was she really the#reason that he went away on me.#im trying not to blame myself . trying not to think about the phone calls i didnt answer. about what i could have done differently. trying#not to think about where we would be if i didnt let my anxieties hold me back. if i wasnt scared about what he'd think of the parts of me#that i keep hidden just a little bit longer than the rest.#and at the same time im trying not to put him on a pedestal. but that pedestal is just where i wholeheartedly believe he belongs#he set the bar for me. he set the standard. i was never too much. i was never too little. he made me feel perfect just as i am
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southern--downpour · 2 years
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pros of new hyperfixation: dopamine :) 
cons of new hyperfixation: i cannot focus on school work all i want to do is read trigun nothing else is interesting rn
#i have so much classwork i need to do but all my brain can do is go 'hehehehehe vash :)' and i cant do Shit abt it#I HAVE *THINGS* TO DO#last time i fixated this bad was dsmp and i literally failed a math class bc of that#and like. logically i know i should be doing stuff. i know this is probably gonna make me crash and fail. however.#entire rest of my brain is in fact still going 'hehehehehe vash :)' and i Cannot Do Anything About This Other Than Read More Trimax#shut up virgil#anyways. hehehehehhehehehheheheh vash :)))))#i started reading trimax ofc and i am fucking in love w/ the black/blonde hair he looks so cute dude#i really liked seeing nightows artsyle improve so far too#love the early art still ofc but its a little inconsistent in quality? + the text placement was SUPER confusing at times#like. it was just hard to figure out who was talking#that was like the main problem ive had reading it so far#but like thats been gettin progressively better and the art has gotten INSANE and im barely into maximum#also. that one page. where wolfwood tells vash to shoot him. yk the one.#that is all.#trigun :))))))#actually no that is not all that entire interaction has been rotating in my brain nonstop#holy shit its such a good scene#i really love wolfwood man#hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh this series is going to fucking kill me#/pos#this motherfucking hyperfix is here to stay apparently esp w/ stampede and the influx of new fans#like if this happened when i first watched og trigun i wouldve just been digging through old content and fan content#and probably wouldve drained it of dopamine pretty quick#but theres NEW content? that i can watch while its AIRING??? im not going to shut the fuck up!
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xoshepard · 5 months
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i have eediat syndrome and didn't go to bed until 1am bc i said "one more hades run" and even tho i'd been getting shit boons all night i suddenly got a rly good combo to the run was supposed to take like 10-15 minutes but i made it all the way to hades instead smdh
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idledreams4 · 5 months
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I know I'm spending too much time on Tumblr cause y'all just call me Harlenn
I just got caught off guard when someone who I know keeps calling my by my dead name did exactly that.
I'm so used to hearing the name I want to that I got blindsided and also it's making me re-evaluate my friend choices...
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crescentmp3 · 1 year
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ehehe...
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munamania · 2 years
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ok had another ‘deep’ convo or whatever with this girl (until 4 in the morning amazing since i had to be up early today) and she really is a lovely person. and i still like her so much. but i feel like i had this sinking feeling of oh jesus christ i don’t know if i can ever say something to you about this
#i mean. we talked about a Lot clearly and i feel like. idk if she is really truly just straight and im an idiot#or if she’s maybe. bi and not willing or needing to like worry about it. yk#and i’m genuinely so happy after everything we’ve talked about that she’s in like a good place and i really#do adore just. this strange dynamic we’ve built. but how much did i overestimate how much it meant to her?#ok well hang on. how much did i possibly mistake tension for… well idk. her just being someone that likes attention and us both enjoying#just talking about whatever. lol#because she is very kind and even if i am mistaking the feelings she’s still very thoughtful toward me and i appreciate that#like she’s a good friend. that unfortunately i’ve had the thought of. oh no if we keep talking am i gonna fall in like one sided love here#hopefully i can keep that under control if i can keep the expectations managed lol#i don’t know what to think whatever!!!!!!!!!!!!#film girl saga#like it feels like we’re building this foundation of trust and comfort and we’ve talked explicitly about sexuality and perception and#idk a bunch of shit. idek how many times now. and i just don’t. sigh#i don’t think she would stop being friends with me but it’s the classic well great now i don’t want it to be weird#and maybe we have a strange enough dynamic that it could easily pass lol idk.#she unfortunately knows how overthinky i am now and i know a little more abt how her thought process works#and it’s like we’re circling these conversations and i’m petrified to know if she ever. has Perceived the feelings. and either#gotten caught up in that and confused or still just enjoyed the conversation enough to look past it. or whatever another altnerative could b
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piplupod · 2 years
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also i miss my extensive vocab i used to have when i was in grade 4 and younger :(
i was made fun of (bullied? idk) for how overly formal i spoke though so now im just a fucking goober who talks as if theyre trapped inside a tumblr meme 24/7 bc kids-teens in school wouldnt make fun of this way of talking. but now im in the adult world and i have to find a middle ground to avoid trouble but thats so impossible for me esp bc i have such terrible word recall now (thank u memory issues)
i just miss how clear i used to speak and how much i delighted in expanding my vocab and finding new words and putting together sentences in really pleasing ways. sobbing wailing crying pounding my fists on the ground etc :/
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pepprs · 2 years
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um… bad jew moment 💃🏻
#purrs#food#ed tw#<- ​just in case#delete later#every time i go to complain about yom kippur or pesach on here i hesitate bc imwlike god im not gonna be inscribed in the. book of life bc i#dared complain about it and im not even observing them as strictly as i should which i know is a flawed way to even think about it bc it#doesn’t matter or whatherr bjt like. god. the food related holidays are so fucking hard. i am not going to go eat something or stop observij#them or whatever bc the discomfort is the point but girl i am taking 3 hearts of hunger damage every minute and i haven’t even reflected and#i can’t think bc im shaking w hunger. idk. it’s not even a big deal but also like none of the other jewish ppl i know observe the high holid#holidays or like any holiday and it’s just very uhmmmm. isolating. im not that religious i guess or like spiritual or anything but this fee#feels important to me even though i kinda hate it and it’s like a little confusing that no one else is doing it and that’s not like a jusgem#judgment of them as much as it is of me like what am i even doing this for if it’s just my family and we’re miserable and starving all day.#idk. i am about to get smited for having these thoughts let alone posting them on tumblr ♥️ but every yom kippur i get depressed about my#jewishness and i know it’s like up to me to make it fit or whatherr but i feel um… bad and disoriented bc i can’t even think straight bc im#starving and missing everything. like how am i supposed to reflect atone repent etc if my brain is crashing. idk *struck down by god for#being the wicked son when really i think i just have a good question and i am allowed to question it maybe. idk. lol*#it’s like *learns over the course of my college career that when i don’t eat i am more depressed and more likely to fall into harmful think#thinking patterns and to spiral into pits of not taking care of myself* *fasts on yom kippur* *doesn’t eat bread during pesach even though#bread is like the most filling thing i eat* and i know im complaining about like. 9 days out of the year but. it’s bad lol
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fardf150 · 3 months
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fuck
#like idk i never realized just how bad she hurt me. i didnt even rly realize she hurt me at all#bc there are so so so many ways she sldve reacted so much worse. but like i never thought someone cld just straight up ignore it.#like i get the way i told her was dumb and confusing. ok. i can understand that. whatever#but idk. she said she wished my sister had told her years earlier so that she cldve helped her back then#but then suddenly it's different when it's me. suddenly it's 'but youve always been my little girl' and 'oh i dont know that sounds dangerou#s' and 'are you sure?' and 'how long have you felt like this'#well it's been almost 5 fucking years now and it hasnt changed. i havent changed. fuck#i trusted her. i trusted her to be there for me and to support me and to accept me and she threw it back in my face and never even blinked#i can never ever trust her again and she doesnt care. she doesnt even know bc shes so wrapped up in all the fucking lies she tells herself#fuck. she did everything wrong. fuck. i can never fully trust anyone with this part of me again bc of her#and it's awful bc it's such an important part of me. it brings me so much joy and i think on it often and i love myself for it#but it's just simmering in my chest and every time i think of letting it hit air again i freeze bc i thought it was safe once and it WASNT.#i wanted to get my name changed before high school. i wanted to start the medical process. i wanted all the thing i thought shed do for me.#my wants and my understanding of my identity has changed now but it still hurts.#it hurts so bad to see other ppl my age get all of that and to have the support of their family and to not be afraid to put a name to it all#im happy for them. but it's so awful hearing her point those ppl out w no self awareness like oh thats so good for them isnt that sweet#I AM RIGHT HERE! YOU COULD BE DOING ALL OF THAT! I NEEDED YOU TO BE THAT FOR ME!#and every time she does acknowledge it she gets it completely wrong or it's just to bemoan how little she understands#'oh everyones changing their name now its so confusing' 'im really trying i dont know what else you want from me' NO YOURE NOT! YOURE NOT!#YOUVE NEVER BEEN WILLING TO TRY. NOT FOR ME.#you never fucking loved me you loved the idea of what you thought i would be and you cant fucking let it go even when the truth is staring#you dead in the face. fuck. you complain about how i 'hate you' or 'think youre stupid' well maybw treat me with an ounce of respect and act#like you understand the things youve EXPLICITLY BEEN TOLD. even a little.#but honestly it's too late. if she were to suddenly have a change of heart now i wouldnt give a damn.#the damage is done you dont get to have this part of me and act like youre such a good and supportive mother.#i cant even say i hate her. i love her but shes hurt me more than anyone else ever has and i can never trust her to actually love me or even#fucking see me or support anything about me that actually matters to me#i dont know. i dont know. thinking about it again.#ive thought abt telling my dad. not bc it wld do any good but bc ik he values honesty and maybe hed throw me a 'damn that sucks'#my sister said this is something i have to fight on but she doesnt get it. i have no ground to stand on as far as shes concerned
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dxsertrot · 6 months
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Actually everything has been too complicated and now that the sun is out I've decided that everything is actually easier than I thought and nothing has to hurt me unless I let it
#drinking coffee and smoking in the sun after a decent day of work#i got to work ot this weekend and do a tough job and the day after i hiked w my mom and ran along the beach w the dog#the longer i keep myself away from the narrative the more further removed and at peace i feel#although sometimes its somewhat distrupted when i see them but i reel it back in real quick#it just feels good to know that i dont have to let anyone in and that i have my people and thats all i need#im goung to carry myself the rest of the way through like i always have#and i dont need anyone elses validation#things will come to me when im ready and its right#if i dont want someone to hurt me then i simply dont have to allow them to hurt me#and if i hurt them then oh well. i need to protect my peace and my self esteem#i have things that i would like to work out but i need to accept that everything i want to have happen i cant make happen#ive been through too much and worked too hard and loved too hard and learned too much to let things like this touch me anymore#my self perception cannot hinge on anyone anymore because only i know what ive done and seen and felt and thought in every momemt of my lif#and how i look is not a solid descripter of all the aspects of me#it is not the bulk of my humanity it is hardly a grain of sand#im not angry or sad im just indifferent and ready for something better and healthier and more secure#and the things and people that i can have by relying on my looks do not hold much value anyways#besides. i am pretty. and im healthy and im good w my money and i laugh w my belly and i know a fuck of a lot more than i ever thought#and ive done more than i ever anticipated#i have a lot of things to be so okay with that i shouldnt even have to think about it#and the fact that i ever do is a luxary not given to the bulk of humanity#ive had the privledge to love many times and learn the lessons that accompany losing#and the privilege to make my own decisions and have my own priorities#i have the time and money to worry about frivolous things just like ive had the same to experience some really cool things#i am full of energy and opportunity and love and i get to decide when and where i want to direct that#if i direct it in a place that leave me feeling sad and empty and confused i can put my focus elsewhere unless i deem it worthy enough to#work at#and when ive poured too much in and got too little back ill know to reframe things#its not that complicated and its not that messy#it just is whatever i make it out to be and im tired of making everything out to be more and allow it to define me
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willowrites · 2 months
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𝐢𝐧 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐡 … you’ve never been eaten out and matt’s never tried…so firsts all around
you and matt had been hanging out in your room for the past hour. you had just gotten home and he decided to stay over for a bit.
you were watching a show that had a tiny sex scene in it.
“it cannot be that good.” your jaw was dropped as the actress was screaming.
matt laughed at your comment. “that guys ego is definitely high if he’s getting a reaction like that.
“yeah, like she’s practically screaming and shouting. although, who am i to judge. i wouldn’t know.” you shrugged. “but i mean if she’s screaming that loud at being eaten out, imagine how good the sex is.”
unfortunately that comment you made had matt fantasizing about how it would be to eat a girl out and it was odd because he saw you as the girl.
he was fidgeting with his shorts as he felt himself harden at his thoughts. he decided to try to ignore it until you asked him an interesting question.
“had a girl ever screamed like that when you had given her head? i’m curious.” you popped a popcorn in your mouth.
he hesitated. “u-uhh, i’ve never really…” he didn’t finish his sentence. you gulped.
“really?” you asked in shock. “sorry, i just…i’d just thought that you have.”
“no..have you ever..you know..” he didn’t want to say anything else.
“ever…” you were waiting for him to ask.
“been eaten out.” he blurted. his boner making things worse.
“oh! um no i haven’t. i’ve like imagined it but nope, never happened to me.” the movie was the least of both of your worries now that you were both thinking of the same topic.
matt couldn’t help but imagine how you’d be in that situation. someone’s head in between your thighs — preferably his head.
“all quiet now.. have i made things awkward.” you pretended to wince.
“oh, no sorry i was just thinking… i kinda wanna know how to. like how to eat a girl out, it’d be good to have some experience i guess.” he confessed.
“uh huh…” you nodded slowly. “maybe…you can practice? on me.”
his eyes widened at your proposal. “you don’t think it would be a little weird?”
“no, im just gonna tell you what feels good and then we’ll both get what we want! given you make me cum, duh.” you laughed.
keep it cool. you thought.
“are you sure?” matt asked again, not wanting for this to be something you’d regret in the near future.
you nodded and that’s how you got to the position in which you were leaned against the headboard waiting for matt to take your underwear off.
“go ahead.” you reassured him as he toyed with your waistband.
“okay.” he whispered pulling your panties down slowly.
the suspense of the situation had you aroused. you were excited but at the same time nervous. you kept telling yourself, he’s your best friend, it’s okay. he won’t do anything you’re uncomfortable with.
your pussy and matt were face to face. he gulped a little intimated because he wanted to be good at it.
“sooo i just, go right in?” he asked pursing his lips.
“i guess so… maybe idk, foreplay? or wait is this considered foreplay?” you asked confused.
“i don’t- im not sure.” he said, unable to tear his eyes away from your center.
“okay, so maybe like use your fingers first?” you knew it was seconds away from being awkward.
as you were about to just say forget it you felt matt’s finger ghost over your leaky hole. he gathered some of your arousal and lathered it over your clit. he then continued to stimulate your clit. your legs bucked up at the sensation.
“am i doing okay?” he whispered, the only thing illuminating his face was the sunset lamp in the corner of your room.
“y-yeah.” you moaned slightly, as he continued to stimulate you. you looked down at him, his fluffy hair and his beautiful eyes. the sight alone had you wanting to just-
your thoughts couldn’t even complete because you felt matt’s hot tongue on you. you let out a deep breath as you leaned back and closed your eyes at the pleasure.
his tongue flicked over your clit as he looked up at you for reassurance that he was making you feel good. while matt was taking his time, his thoughts were elsewhere enjoying the way you tasted. in seconds he was devouring you, addicted to the way you tasted.
he licked a long stripe over your center pulling your thighs toward him. he sucked on your puffy clit. “r-right there. fuck—” your eyes tightly shut.
“you taste so fucking good…” matt muttered against you. he was consuming you. it was as if he lost all control in himself. he couldn’t get enough. “tell me how good i’m doing.”
you nodded quickly. “you’re doing s-so good.” you threaded your hands through his brunette hair. yes you had fantasized about this situation — not with matt specifically but this situation for sure.
matt’s ego boosted as a spurt of whimpers escaped you as he entered his middle finger in you. he pumped it in and out whilst continuing his previous work on your clit. he had been doing so good, you were on the verge of cumming.
matt could tell too — by the way your thighs were starting to close around his head and shake. he didn’t know how he had lived without the taste of you on his tongue. he didn’t ever want to stop. he wanted to do this everyday of his life.
you tried to blurt out the words but you struggled; sensitive to how fast he was flicking your clit. he looked up to see your struggle and grinned against you.
“go on, cum on my tongue. i wanna taste it.” he begged. matt needed to taste you. he enjoyed seeing you writhing underneath him. the way you were struggling to grapple onto reality.
you nodded finally feeling your body seize up as your orgasm washed over you like a big wave. you were tugging on matt’s hair trying to get him away from your sensitive pussy but your orgasm made him want to push you further.
you had begun to feel so sensitive you tried to push his head away as much as you could while whining. “f-fuck — sensitive matt.” you begged and he finally pulled away.
your chest was heaving up and down. you had started to slow your breathing and opened your eyes. matt with your shiny substance drooled and covering his mouth and chin. he had a smug grin on his face symbolizing he was definitely pleased with himself.
“please tell me you’ll let me do that again.” he licked his lips.
you took another deep breath and combed through his hair with your hand. “how could i not?”
© willowrites
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