#am I gonna have to tag all the fandoms and characters?
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8 years of trollhunters and 4 years Since i Starting watching the Series it was blast. Despite the Movie that shell not speaking off tainted the the Series name but i was glad to meet a lot of you.
so Blu if you See this i hope you're doing good and thanks you for Supporting Jimtober This Year you truly gave hope to the people of the fandom Despite your troubled life
@gh99st thanks for being good friend and Supporting me when i needed it especially in hard times.
@albentelisa- i miss you i hope you Showed up i always Love your headcanons about Jim and Clairebear as well as toby and the Palchuk
@averagechickenenjoyer - palchuk is the best he is already perfect so he can kick Merlin ass and he gonna take care of Bassey
But in all seriousness you're of the people I respected the most in reddit so I glad to have you also in Tumblir
@lemon-drop8 i know you're not active as you used to be your art is always Amazing and you're fun to talk to
@tr3xinfinite it's good to make for you that Jim video Your art style is one of the best i've Seen and you truly give it your all
@pinkytoothlesso11 your Passion for Characters even those who aren't Strickler Jim and Blinky are impressive i wonder about that Claire Changeling fic tho. and Also the fact that movie never Killed you
@lloyd283 it's good to have Someone who have a good heart and big dream in the fandom
@seekerofblades @yanana i hope that Strickler and Barbara
@aevykcreates i Love your art about Jim Claire and a bit of 3below
@iseeyouopel thanks for the Amazing Claire fan art She Lovely a colorful girl but Also a bit of a weirdo and you making her even more cuter and beautiful
@sweet-void-princess - you've Questionable Taste in Merlin Jk i know i am not active that much in your Server but i always happy to See your art and
@rise-of-arcadia it always good to tag you with your girl Zoe. i hope she would have more Screentime so then he got Zouxie and maybe She Claire and Aja could be girlfriends
@daydream358 @girlgomitroll it's Always Nice to have you here in the fandom
#trollhunters#tales of arcadia#jim lake jr#claire nuñez#toby domzalski#jlaire#Aja Tarron#Krel Tarron#hisrdoux casprn#Steve Palchuk#eli pepperjack#creepsalyers
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Me: Auntie still doesn't know what to name her kids and she asked me for suggestions two days ago and it's like.. what does she want me to say? What to name girl-boy twins– idk, Eska and Desna?
Vi, stifling a laugh: Dipper and Mabel?
Me: Edric and Emira??
Vi: Oh, oh, Ruffnut and Tuffnut!!
Our mom, passing by in the background: Osman and Huricihan
*cue her chuckling, my dying hyena sounding laughter, and Vi's confusion bc she's not versed in Period Drama Lore*
#main blog post bc I did mention Eska and Desna#actual video call convo we had today#sometimes family is good. actually#of course. vi proceeded to ruin it in the next 5 minutes by calling me 'Anne of green gables looking ass'#in reference to the nightgown our grandma gave me to wear to bed tonight#not that she's too wrong in that assessment but still. ffs vi can we have one civil conversation#(/j we both laughed about it)#am I gonna have to tag all the fandoms and characters?#okay fine#the legend of korra#eska and desna#gravity falls#dipper and mabel#the owl house#edric and emira#how to train your dragon#ruffnut and tuffnut#magnificent century#osman and huricihan#not tagging anyone separately idec
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Noah fence but if you can't handle thinking about the actual story of Mouthwashing and you just want to imagine silly found family scenarios with the crew on the Tulpar then maybe you shouldn't be engaging with HORROR media...... just a thought.
#mouthwashing#100% gonna regret tagging it but whatever it's been on my mind a lot recently#i feel like mouthwashing absolutely should not have been fandom-ified the way it has been#I'm not saying that no one should enjoy it. I'm not saying that no one should make silly memes or hcs or fanart#I just feel like all the people who are like#“mouthwashing but nothing bad happens and everyone has a good time and Jimmy is a normal person and/or dies”#are kind of..... severely missing the point of the game#it feels almost disrespectful in a way. this game was clearly trying to communicate some heavy stuff#and ppl are just throwing that all away to play with the characters like dolls#I mean obv it's not really my business how other ppl engage with media but scrolling through the tags I'm like. man cmon#anyway Daisuke is my newest chew toy blorbo but if I try to draw him I need to actually be put down for real#rambles#(it's too late btw I already sketched him bc I was annoyed by seeing all the fanart where he just has a gash across his face)#(he got an AXE TO THE FACE)#oops it's 5 am lol
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I love fandoms, especially witnessing what fans take away from source material and how fans interpret it based on their experiences. Not to mention the stark difference of interaction between new fans, casual fans, experienced fans, and long-term fans.
I say this because the SVSSS fandom has continuously fascinated me in insisting in discussions that there are parallels between Shen Jiu and Luo Binghe (tell don't show), but in their fanworks, I just see parallels between Luo Binghe and Yue Qingyuan (show don't tell).
And it's not even (fully) a case where they're blending character personalities because they want what the other dynamic has, it's just how the characters are based on canon in two different timelines.
All of this to say, perhaps original draft PIDW (NOT original!PIDW nor pre!SY PIDW which are completely different) was supposed to revolve around the dynamic between SJ and YQY vs SJ and LBH. Perhaps YQY was to be the last hour mastermind, the true foil to LBH.
And fandom is just circling this idea without realising it because, once again, the unreliable narrator that is SY has already convinced this fandom that any version of SJ has to be a/the villain, regardless if it's through his own actions or baseless rumours.
Warning, run-on sentence ahead.
I don't know, mans, but it's gotta mean something that LBH and YQY have such similar life beats of being orphaned and having a tough life but remaining kind/compassionate because they had someone to live for until they didn't which left them empty until they found (or refound in YQY's case) one (1) man to obsess over in an uncomfortably intrusive way with no regards for his feelings and rejections, eventually reaching a position as the most powerful being in existence with a huge caveat that their sword is 83% of that power and is slowly killing them which did nothing to soften said man of their obsession's into showing them kindness leading to the ultimate confrontation between the two in which only one could survive and keep their obsession, not that it mattered because neither of them got to experience his feelings reciprocated, except in another timeline where the same things are happening until their obsession suddenly stops rejecting their (still intrusive) advances even if he is acting a bit silly, but hey take advantage while you can and take advantage they did because now they have that reciprocated feeling (except one still "won" as he gets to keep him for himself) and be thankful that all it took was, in their perspective, a near death fever that drastically changed his personality and most likely left him crippled in some other way, preventing their obsession from not NOT needing them anymore, all-in-all fulfilling their desire to be relied upon again, hooray! 😋😁✌🏽
In all seriousness, at the end of the day people are going to draw connections between characters that fit whatever narrative they understood from the story. SVSSS fandom just seems to be trying to convince others of one narrative while believing on a deeper level of another narrative. It's amusing and makes following the fandom fun.
#the hippo speaks#shen qingqiu#shen jiu#luo binghe#mxtx svsss#svsss#svsss fandom#yue qingyuan#i am never going to get over that the fix it for the pidw!timeline proposed by svsss#was to put its titular character through traumatic brain injury that changed his personality and scrambled his memory#all so these two overly attached men could have their feelings returned#i know that's grossly simplifying it but sometimes you gotta do that#to understand the sheer horror of what actually occurred#sj: I hate men because they've ruined me to get what they want. i will never again give men what they want.#system: well that's not gonna fly buddy so we'll just replace you with someone who will give men what they want#also system: but the kicker is your replacement won't know he's giving them what they want because he doesn't understand your trauma 😁#system cont.: so it'll actually be super romantic and just a hint traumatising here and there for when he doesn't give in#system cont.: but thats ok because he's soft so he'll bre- ahem fall for one of these men soon enough#system: and then all will be saved 🥰 just like the replacement sqh accepting his man's abuse instead of fighting it teehee 😋#telling y'all the system is a reference to ill advised fans who think being stalked is a complimemt and being abused is protective#and being gaslit is just how people talk 🥲#the hippo tags
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while it’s perfectly fine to have your own headcanons that are non-canon compliant — by all means, go wild. recognizing pieces of yourselves in fictional characters can be a very healing and validating experience. this is nonetheless a casual, well-intentioned reminder that gale, in fact, does not have bpd.
bpd is a pervasive pattern of instability affecting interpersonal relationships, self-image, and mood. the disorder is marked by impulsivity beginning in early adulthood and is present in a variety of contexts. a diagnosis requires at least 5 of the following 9 criteria to be met:
Fear of abandonment
Unstable or changing relationships
Unstable self-image; struggles with identity or sense of self
Impulsive or self-damaging behaviors (e.g., excessive spending, unsafe sex, substance abuse, reckless driving, binge eating).
Suicidal behavior or self-injury
Varied or random mood swings
Constant feelings of worthlessness or sadness
Problems with anger, including frequent loss of temper or physical fights
Stress-related paranoia or loss of contact with reality
source: [x]
i highlighted the criteria that do apply to gale in one way or another in a pretty purple.
i personally believe that it’s rather harmful to equate his relationship with mystra with her being “his fp”. she is a deity, his goddess, and the source of his powers, who is in in full control of the magic he wields.
gale: mystra commands all magic. salvation, if such a thing exists, is hers to bestow or withhold.
gale has been effectively groomed and conditioned to serve and revere her at every turn since early childhood. imo this comparison really undermines a lot of crucial points in gale’s story that deal with his overall trauma and abuse. after all, you wouldn’t call shar sh*dowhe*rt’s fp either.
gale doesn’t revile mystra, nor does he commit benevolent deeds solely motivated by the secret hope that she will somehow notice and take him back. when you meet gale in the game he has already fully come to terms with the fact that he has been abandoned by mystra with no hope of reconciliation whatsoever. he also had some very fitting lines in ea regarding this topic that i'm sad haven't been repurposed in the full release in some way.
gale: [the tadpoles] don't know that some things are impossible. they don't know that... they don't know. player: what is impossible about what you're being shown? gale: forgiveness. gale: it is mystra i see. and yet it cannot be her. there was a time when i would have believed - but no longer. gale: suffice it to say she would not bestow upon me the favors promised in these dreams. that is how i know they are delusions.
he has already reached the stage of acceptance. moreover, gale only starts to realize that mystra might have been in the wrong for requesting his death once the tadpole squad & tav speak some sense into him. and even then he doesn’t ever show that his emotions regarding mystra are anywhere along those lines. he is instead rightfully angered that she only saw value in his death, after he had been worshipping her loyally for years.
gale: i worshipped mystra loyally for years, and in that time she granted me the barest sliver of the power i was ready to wield. gale: even with the fate of the world at stake, she had little more to offer me than the means of blowing myself up at a more convenient time. she's done nothing to help us.
gale: you abandoned me in my hour of greatest need. i had no obligation to help you in yours. gale: because you had no right to ask that of me. you cast me out, remember?
gale doesn’t display rapid changes in mood either. he is a character who is generally very composed and has been known to remain nonchalant even in the face of utter horror. tim downie himself even commented on this once. source: [x]
the only instance i can think of is his sudden switch from resigned-to-death to utter-eye-sparkling-enthusiasm once he spots the crown of karsus. apart from crucial story reasons that i won’t touch upon in this post, i’d also like to add that it’s a rather common phenomenon for people who have just barely survived a suicide attempt to suddenly be filled with zeal and unbridled energy. he doesn't display impulsivity without thorough consideration when it comes to its acquisition either. he considers this a golden opportunity and is positively enthusiastic and elated that this might prove an alternative to him ending up in a cloud of netherese smoke. nonetheless, he knows what he is doing. evident in him actually succeeding in ascending in one of his endings.
gale: this is no passing whim, trust me. if i can obtain that crown, it will affect us all. it is not a decision i'll take lightly. gale: it's our future that i'm thinking of - we can't rely on anyone else to do it for us. gale: for now - we've learned all we can.
neither are his relationships that we do know of (namely elminster, tara, and morena) frequently changing. they are marked by years of mutual respect, care, and consistency. there is nothing unstable about them. while it's important to note that his relationship with tav is still in its honeymoon stages during the main game, there is no inclination of any push-and-pull dynamic between them whatsoever.
gale isn’t preoccupied with keeping up some sort of benevolent act in order to win (back) affection — he genuinely IS a good person and he proves this at every turn. moreover, to have a tressym become your familiar you must be of Good alignment.
(taken from tumblr user galedekarios's post.)
there is never a moment where his ideals or alignment suddenly change. in fact, i’d argue that he and wyll are most consistent in this regard when compared to the rest of the companions. gale makes his moral standpoint very clear from the beginning on and also explicitly states that he believes that in order to survive this entire ordeal it would be selfish of him if he wouldn’t be willing to compromise on his morals. this isn’t a sudden bout of ✨muahahaha wizard hubris✨ that he barely contained to hold in before, this is yet another act of selflessness — it is what he’s willing to do for the group and subsequently, the welfare of faerun.
player: i love unsavoury things. don't feel guilty on my account. gale: that's good to know. although i should say i do what i do out of a sense of utility and pragmatism, not a love of the unsavoury. gale: we're up against the greatest threat faerun has ever faced. i don't mind getting my hands dirty if it gives us a better chance of surviving. gale: whatever advantage i can gain for us. i will. and i refuse to feel guilty for it, no matter how much mystra's chidings might echo in my skull.
this is him, once again trying to be useful in whatever way he can. to give them an advantage, a slither of hope against seemingly impossible odds, so they might make it out of this in one piece. gale wouldn’t approve of those actions under normal circumstances, but their predicament is as far from any definition of “normal” as it can get.
gale is no fool, he realizes this is essentially about survival. he knows that he has no option left other than to tolerate, which is why he can be convinced to not immediately depart tav’s company even if they choose to commit atrocities. this is no character flaw of his or him displaying a previously dormant openness for cruelty, this is about recognizing the necessity.
player: you don't stand a chance alone. you're free to go. i dare you. gale: gods damn you - you're right. few things are more powerful than the will to live.
gale: i thought the orb to be the greatest of my sins, but i see now that there are darker depths to which i might yet sink. you may be content to sink into that abyss, but i assure you - i am not.
gale doesn’t lead a split existence. he has a very strong sense of identity. he knows what he wants, what he doesn’t want and he isn’t shy in expressing his boundaries either. which he has especially shown when it comes to his relationship with tav. i originally had intended to touch upon this in another post entirely but: i firmly believe his entire Gale of Waterdeep™ persona is more of a performance than him struggling to find a sense of identity and trying them on for size. it is an intentional decision to separate gale dekarios from the great wizard of waterdeep, to create distance and make sure his family name remains untarnished in case things should ever go sideways.
gale: i agree. and on the plus side, if i get myself into any truly cataclysmic straits during the remainder of our journey, my family name will go untarnished.
there is also a deep-rooted feeling of unworthiness and his firm belief that love and praise are conditional resources that he will only be granted through his talents alone, naturally. presenting himself as gale dekarios, the man, would mean highlighting his shortcomings and very human flaws, while distracting from the aspects of himself that are deemed praiseworthy, the ones that actually matter: his magical prowess.
i personally believe that part of the beauty of gale’s story is him realizing just how “little” it takes for him to be truly content. he gets his happy ending, with someone at his side who truly sees him, understands him and unabashedly commits to him. they worship and adore him in return — and it is well deserved. he isn’t reduced to be constantly and restlessly searching for some unattainable ideal to fill the gaping void within himself. he doesn’t secretly thirst for more power still or believes that in being with tav he is settling for something. instead, he is finally happy to just be. be and be accepted. teaching a class of unruly wizards and coming home to his spouse each day already fulfills him.
gale: that's how i feel with you - content. it's a rather unfamiliar feeling, i must say. not something gale of waterdeep ever craved.
even if he doesn’t pursue a romance with tav, he reaches a realization of “oh, it appears i am not irredeemably flawed and only able to reach true redemption through my own death. what i needed was actually with me all along.” throughout their journey and through his friend's support. i think that’s a very powerful and comforting message. he is very well capable of finding peace within himself.
devnotes: his default state is that he returned to waterdeep and became a professor of illusory magic at his former school, blackstaff academy. general vibe here is that this is a gale who's found peace with himself - he's a great teacher, one his students are mostly in awe of.
to repeat myself: sharing your headcanons is all in good fun, nor should you ever be discouraged from doing so. this is your personal tumblr experience, after all. but i personally think we should be mindful of unintentionally perpetuating negative stereotypes, such as narcissism being a general indicator or being deemed a classic depiction of bpd. i think we can all agree that the continuous longing for acceptance, connection, praise, and approval is something we all have in common deep down, regardless of whatever disorder we may have. [insert victoria justice meme here]
gale may be many things to many people, but he is no entitled narcissist.
#with love. a person diagnosed with bpd <3#this turned much longer than i originally intended it to be (aka less of a reply and more of a character study)#by now you know that i am incapable of cutting myself short. i’m so sorry#i debated if i should put this in the tag at first#but i personally think that this is a very interesting discussion#also to reiterate: this is by NO MEANS a slight at the original poster#i just thought it more respectful to make my own post instead of invading theirs with my ranting#fandom is all about fun and escapism.#if you interpret characters in a certain way that i personally disagree with that is a-okay#BUT i’m also gonna have my own specific brand of fun by pointing out why you’re wrong (affectionately)#also i quickly want to add that if you're interested in a very accurate and respectful portrayal of bpd: watch crazy ex-girlfriend!!#its on netflix and genuinely such a funny and unapologetically weird show. the writers have really done their homework#bg3#baldurs gate 3#gale dekarios#gale of waterdeep#bg3 meta#character analysis#it speaks#long post#suicide mention
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Ever see your favorite character get so mischaracterized that you just have to stare at a wall for 5 minutes?
#Am I sane? Idk#I'm not even gonna tag a specific fandom bc all the fandoms im in have this#characters
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Tumblr is way chiller than Twitter for sure but sometimes I see a post and I'm like. Y'all DO remember this is a block game, right? You're not gonna get legitimately pissy and passive-aggressive over characters doing things in a block game, RIGHT???
#i talk#qsmp talk#Chatter: Jaiden don't do this— twitter will cancel you!#The rest of us in chat: Why should she care about anything Twitter says#People on frickin twitter AND tumblr: *whining about Jaiden*#LIKE BRO YOU CANNOT BE SERIOUS LMFAOOOOOO#fandom wank#I'm gonna start unfollowing people#not even just for bad opinions I'm just tired of seeing people being mean and bitter#I'm just here to have fun I don't want to constantly see whining#Critique characters and stuff all you want that's part of the fandom experience but some of y'all are so damn mean for no reason lmao#Touch grass and seek therapy#I know me posting this is part of the ''too many people complaining'' problem but Jaiden's my gal I am a little bit annoyed by that#Again: character critique is fine#but sometimes it's just so passive-aggressive and like. written like the character did a personal attack on YOU#<- the last tag is the most important point here I think
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every day i wish the princesses had like any character at all and werent just there to be girlfriends
#they could be so COOL#THEYRE SO AWESOME IM LIKE IN LOVE WITH THEIR DESIGNS but theyre never once not just#generic wife characters.#i feel like the closest theyve gotten is in the comics they have like the TINIEST sliver of personality but even then its barely there#dunno if this is applicable to face the music i havent seen it in four years#but goddddd. let them have like any personality at all PLEASE#bechdel test who. whats that. gone. never existed#i mean its understandable its some movies and shit from 89/91 its not gonna be that good#i feel so awful like completely ignoring them for bill and ted but also theres like nothing there to do anything with.#theyre basically not there in the actual media anyways#forced to be a steryotypical fandom m/m shipper by the horrrible writing of the women#rip#either that or make them lesbians that always works. not with eachother cuz theyre sisters but just like in general. i feel like thatd help#slash half jay#jello shut up challenge#bill and ted#mmm late night inability to sleep fueled tag rambling my favorite pasttime#tehy are sisters right im not making that up. i dont think i am. anyways done talkign now
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maybe i shouldn't draw them before even knowing what this game is about
#idk i don't wanna draw much serious stuff#yes i call those silly comics as serious stuff#also should've reread my anatomy books#and actually find a proper reference instead of coming up with shit in my brain#ykw im not gonna draw mithrix in the following months anyway and all other characters i draw don't even show an inch of skin so whatever#also it's the beginning of the semester so#hmm i guess i never even had my summer vacation to begin with and i don't have any class this semester#im just simply depressed i guess#do you even use the word simply to describe depression#i ramble too much again#im not even gonna tag this i think i will be murdered by ror fandom for unknown reasons#especially when i don't even know who i am drawing#my art
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still haven't moved on from zane in this episode (aka I hit tag limit again and am unhappy about it)
#alek insanity#not gonna main tag this but prepare for a tiny rant#home is actually really good zane characterization and its super cool to me how it holds up to this day#s1 characterization is very specific to me because the behaviors displayed by the ninja there (mostly) isnt bc thats how they really are but#its due to societal pressure. cole originally being more 'stone faced tough guy' -> 'down to earth' -> 'really sensible easy to talk to guy'#is because hes always been a sensitive guy... but he felt he couldnt express that true version of himself. thats the whole thing behind his#true potential. jay going from s1 -> s6 -> now is less of societal pressure and more teenager figuring himself out but it still applies. ish#seeing how much the ninja have changed or grown from then to now is amazing because back then they all wore masks. they didnt know each#other all that well. but theyve gained that comfortability with each other and also have grown and matured as people#some seasons / eps characterization for certain people im not a fan of (lloyds random misogyny arc in s13) but i mean the overall trend here#and then there is zane. zane in home was pretty dead on to how he behaves now (at least... when it comes to his faults?) and i dont want to#say people skim over that but i am the sf proclaimed n1 s1e2 fan and overthink every scene. zane's early characterization is some of my fav#for him period. he also goes through a ton of traumatic stuff and a ton of bad writing bouts but why he acts so 'weird' or 'distant' has#always been a thread sewn in. he changed so much he stayed the same in a way... if that makes sense. -> ohhh the ninja get mail and he#doesnt? oh he has no family? he quite literally walks away from that situation. oh the ninja are yelling in his face and asking whats wrong#with him? he literally walks away from that situation. he says its to follow the falcon but seeing how he apologized to them by not only#baking a ton of pies (cough... the food fight is what led to him leaving at first) but he also found them a whole entire new house.#zane is unable to truly value what he does for others. insert him in s11 saying he 'tried' to fufill his goal of protecting others.#everything he has ever done still isnt good enough. then the ninja tried to apologize and he didnt really... let them.#that one post about characters putting on facades and that facade being how people really see them. even in fandom. thats zane to me#the guy who lies about being upset and avoids his problems ran away after being yelled at? and he said he wasnt really mad? that is a lie!!#him being a ~360 when it comes to his character development is neat to me because he never hid behind a mask in the same way the others did#cole wanting to seem tough vs being really soft? kai wanting approval so bad he starts being selfish? kai isnt selfish usually!#he is self centered but that is a whole different thing. just wanting to fit in and breaking free of that. zane's true potential came in the#form of 'i finally know why i am not normal' instead of 'i will be my true self'. zane never pretended to not be weird#(instert book) states he literally didnt know why people got mad at him. he just existed and it was 'wrong'. the mask he hid behind was#avoidance. he was pretty open about how he actually was (most of the time). when he was upset he would audibly sigh and walk away lol#but for him saying he wasnt upset / saddened by the ninja... it felt like a moment of selflessness. if that makes sense. he blamed himself#for the monestary burning down. so he didnt deserve the apologies (ish) in the virtues of spinjitzu zane is shown as the generous one iirc#he puts the needs of others over his own. he will bear whatever burden he needs if others are happy. at that same time he doesnt allow
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while i'm on my bullshit, I want to extend a special 'fuck you' to whoever it was on the Larian team that made the companions nicer and propped one up over the others. Give me Bitch!Shadowheart back, I want Sassy!OG!Wyll, where is MEANER Lae'zel, put Astarion back in the pod I don't like his 'knife to the throat' introduction, Give Minthara's extra scenes and snipped dialogue back - remember she had TWO sex scenes. WHY are we treating the ORIGINAL script like its some sort of taboo thing that needs to be repulsed.
#[ 🕷️ ] —— out of character#[ I swear to God if I see one more person say 'oh this was cut cause it was an old line' Im going to tell them to fuck off ]#[ since when are ORIGINAL lines bad? I WANT the original shit ]#[ la*rian stop doing major updates where you're revamping a whole game that wasn't even complete when you released it challenge ]#[ stop babying ONE companion over the other- no offense my as*tarion fan mutuals but goddamn ]#[ I just learned the other day his origin has so much extra shit in it and now I blame this guy for why ]#[ all of the other companion and shite are neglected and glitched to hell or lacking ]#[ ASTA*rion rpers save me I'm this close to hating your boy outside of RP because of general fandom and l*rian favoritism ]#[ and BECAUSE I like you my as*tar*ion peeps I will make a special tag for YOU when I btich about him because o Boy am I gonna start soon ]#[ thing is you have to ask me to do it ]
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not even gonna tag this properly bc i don't wanna get Involved but i do have some Thoughts i need to get out into the void so here we go
(aaa quick edit: CW for mention/discussion of Boothill leaks)
#today's gone Badly and i'm upset but instead of venting abt it i'm gonna channel that energy into doing a bit of tag rambling abt Boothill#well. less abt Him and more abt uh. self-analyzing my anxiety surrounding contributing to fandoms. he's just today's catalyst#like. i know it's mostly a me thing. i'm hypersensitive to criticism and very conflict avoidant + socially anxious + perfectionistic etc.#so I'm the one that keeps myself from posting more stuff out of fear of being criticized or called-out for what i've made#bc inevitably Someone's gonna see it and think its OOC or a problematic take or they'll misread my intent. etc etc what have you#but like. that's inevitable. there's no way to communicate every single thing with all of the nuance required to avoid misunderstandings#and other times it's not a misunderstanding it's just a difference of opinions and that's Fine!! there's no accounting for personal taste#there's no accounting for several things actually. taste‚ bias‚ lore-knowledge‚ differing levels of chronic-online-ness‚ etc#so this isn't me complaining abt the state of fandom culture (although i do think. sometimes. ppl take shit a bit too seriously)#but anyways all of this is mostly just anxiety-fueled. it's not like i very often actually even receive negative feedback or anything#if anything ppl tend to tell me that i'm overthinking it and killing my own fun and worried that my stuff is more OOC than it is#which like. yeah. Yeah u right :) but that's just the way that i am! always losing the idgaf war i suppose#anyways what's Boothill got to do w this ur wondering. well. i've been thinking abt the quickly emerging concept that he's illiterate.#and it just. has me feeling a lot of ways. and watching ppl disagree over it has me feeling some Bad ways. bc it's def a loaded topic!#if you'll pardon the pun there. and i don't rlly have anything new to add other than that i'm conflicted abt it.#like yeah i saw the leaks days ago. of him mentioning 'not hitting the books' much as a child when we ask him why he sends voice messages#or voice Transcriptions ig. ykwim. and like. *braces for impact* ...i liked it? like. it doesn't feel right to call it endearing#i'm not trying to infantilize him. ok that's not the right word either but ugh. you know? what i mean?? who am i kidding even i don't know#it's not quite right to say that it feels like Representation either. but it's something close i guess#as a southern person myself who didn't receive a 'complete' education due to factors that weren't to do with my intelligence#the concept of seeing him as a capable force to be reckoned with and respected who also happens to have not received much formal education#i like that. i do. but there's so many issues w it at the same time. like. as i said‚ being southern myself has me Wary of the way Hoyo is-#writing him. as well as of the way that the fandom is taking the bits of his lore and running away w them. and i'm Very aware of how ppl-#will see a southern character and be All Too Eager to agree that they're lacking intelligence based on our Redneck™ stereotype#sigh. and before we even go too far with this. it's not even confirmed that hes completely illiterate. which is a valid criticism i've seen#there's Multiple reasons that could make him prefer voice to text. but regardless. i'm just worried that ppl will misconstrue my intentions#like. example: that edit i made the other day of him saying 'no thanks i can't read'. wasn't me playing into the stereotype of-#'haha dumb country boy can't read!' it was. in my eyes. something he'd say as a joke to make light of a potential insecurity#like. i think there's far more depth to Boothill's character if ppl could look past the surface. and i dont wanna contribute to the problem#but sometimes ppl Will have stereotypical traits and i wish the same could apply to characters as long as it's done Thoughtfully.
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im so used to how finely curated my fandom experience is with star wars that im actually suffering trying to navigate the fallout fandom rn.
#cy speaks#i am having a bad time#think im just gonna do what i did with my sw blog and like just bulid my own little sandbox and ignore people for the most part lol#write my fic and ignore the majority of the fandom#also im begging people to tag shit properly#tired of being jumped scared by untagged vaultgh*ul in the main tag#i have avoided so many tags for it already#i dont care if you ship it but i cannot get behind it#lowkey gives me the ick bc i only got platonic found family vibes with cooper and lucy#also some of the fans of that ship are very weird and rude about maximus#for reasons we all know (racism) but so many deny#and the way so many are treating lucy like just some insert and disregard her character doesnt sit right with me#but now im just rambling in the tags so im gonna stop <3#gonna build my little sandbox
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SHUT UUPPP LOOK AT THEM
#i don't know this fandom's stance on if press releases r spoilers yet so i'm just not gonna tag anything#i cropped louise out sorry i don't care abt her#slash jay#i just like gene and tina a lot more (but louise is the breakout character so it's okay this all just cancels out like bodmas)#i AM drawing their new costumes but between dumb shit like uni coursework and applying for jobs i don't have much time to draw the sillies#((also to the person that requested alex I AM DRAWING HIM!! i like him a lot i'm just a slow drawer + busy thank u for being patient xoxo))#sorry for the rambling in tags just know i am very NOT normal abt this (tina and gene crumbs)#spoilers#(< just in case)#bb
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I’m never gonna get over the guy in s3e15 who, when asked if he wanted to catch the guy who stole his kidney, asked if it would get him his kidney back and when he was told no decided he didn’t care that much ab catching the guy bc what’s the point
#it’s genz culture actually#like. ig u can find the criminal but not if it’s too much work !!!#who needs two kidneys anyway#he’s all like well yeah it hurt like a Mf but what am I gonna do now it’s already GONE#most relatable spn character#10/10 tbh#spn#supernatural#dean winchester#sam winchester#this is actually the first post I’ve ever tagged Sam in and I feel a little bad but#90% of my spn posts are me comparing this fandom to others#and the other 10% is the destiel confession meme#I also personally believe sam would hate tumblr#don’t get me wrong him and Dean both have accounts bc. they can see posts ab demons and shit#but neither of them rly care#meanwhile cas has a small corner of Tumblr fame#he doesn’t post any specific thing it’s just so random#tags are longer than the actual post#i’ll shut up now#threefuckencrows watches spn
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At this rate I'm not gonna be able to unmute Gaiden spoilers before adding Infinite Wealth spoilers am I
#smol speaks#I'm gonna be waiting ages before I can click spoiler tags on Discord cgfvbhjnghbjnk#but like i AM kinda sad cause it's like the brainrot is fading? but it's not? the problem is it hyperfocused itself onto a character who wa#there for 2 games. yes i can say 'he's alive to me' as much as i like but it's funny coping denial. i am still legit upset by this fact lol#AGAIN ik it's dumb but he means a lot to me and i love him and it does make me sad when people go 'HES DEAD LMAO' and like. that's the joke#in and of itself yknow? like im somehow dumb for wishing a character received better? but that's a different post entirely#POINT IS im already bored with 6. im bored of Kiryu. i want to see Ichiban but we dont play JRPGs so that may take a while as well. and THE#we play Gaiden. oh fuck when are we gonna play Ishin??? damn there's a lot to play#anyway all this to say Nishiki is still my gf but something about the games and fandom are slowly losing me but not just the regular#'hyperfixation is dying down' way cause i still have a lot to say i just. am i having less fun? maybe? a little bit?
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