#also clears bad end (which i was SPECIFICALLY trying to avoid) was the very first ending i got i wanted to kms

[cameleonvermillon]

Playing through Dramatical Murder and Koujaku's route is my favorite so far 😭

[antihbki]

Hi. I am here to discuss the tumblr users @/kotocest, known mainly in the radqueer community as Ciel, and his girlfriend @/radikyuu, who is known mainly as Kyuumi or Opphie.

Potentially triggering content ahead. Please read forward with caution.

I met Ciel and Kyuumi in September of 2023. I met Kyuumi first in a syscord/system discord server (which I will not be naming for the safety and privacy of the staff and server members), and was later introduced to Ciel.

From the start, it was obvious things were a little off. Kyuumi would often vent in the previously mentioned server about feeling gross or horrible about doing things or behaving a certain way and included that she doesn't think she could change because "he" wouldn't like her anymore. A little down the line, I found out that "he" was referring to Ciel.

Her vents weren't the only concerning aspect, though. It was clear how unstable she was when Ciel wasn't around or when someone said something about him that ticked him off. Anytime someone pointed out his toxic behavior towards her, Kyuumi would get super upset and would eventually spiral and break down because of it. Ciel would use this to his advantage and claim that she experienced such strong feelings regarding him because she was a "part of him" or because she was a "clone" of him, which would only serve as a way for Ciel to strengthen the leash he already had on Kyuumi. These are still things Kyuumi still seemingly believes, which only leads me to assume that he is still pushing this belief onto her.

There would be numerous occasions of Kyuumi coming to panic to me in DMs about these things, too. One time was especially alarming, and I am only comfortable talking about this because she herself has publicly admitted to this situation taking place. Kyuumi messaged me around 2 in the morning, telling me that she thought she was going to die. Her messages were vague and barely readable, but from what I could understand, she had injured herself in some way and was losing a lot of blood. I told her to call an ambulance, to which she responded that she couldn't. After asking why, I was blocked. After hours of staying awake, waiting for her to tell me that she was okay, I received a message from Ciel at around 10 pm. He informed me that Kyuumi was in the hospital but claimed he didn't know what happened. I asked why she blocked me, but he told me he didn't know. The next day, he admitted to encouraging her to harm herself, saying that he never intended for her to be harmed so bad, but said he didn't know why she said she couldn't call an ambulance.

Fast forward to Kyuumi coming out of the hospital, I approached her about the topic and told her what I knew, and this was when she told me about Ciel threatening her into not calling an ambulance. According to Kyuumi, the two of them were in a vc when he encouraged her to do it. Here is a screenshot of what she said to me.

|| start ||

|| end ||

While I am going to try to be neutral for most of this post, I fully believe that he was trying to kill her. This is not the only time something like this has happened.

As you can see in that last message, Kyuumi had told me before about the fact that she had sent pictures to him. She came to me after she sent them to him and told me about what she did, and said it made her feel disgusting and horrible about her body. When I tried to comfort her, she broke down and told me the things he said about her after he saw the pictures of her. She also told me about some transphobic behavior he was displaying. Here is a screenshot of her explaining that to me.

|| start ||

|| end ||

I point this part out because Kyuumi is a trans girl. She mentions in the screenshot that she asked him to avoid making comments about that specific part of her, and he disrespected that boundary and made those comments anyway. After this, she was left feeling very dysphoric and did not speak to me much.

This part is especially upsetting because Kyuumi was closeted about being a trans woman at the time. She was going by he/him pronouns and was almost exclusively using masculine terms and publicly claimed to be a trans man, but Ciel and I (as well as one other mutual friend) were aware of Kyuumi's identity. Despite Kyuumi trusting Ciel with such an important part of her identity, he went out of his way to upset her and make her uncomfortable.

She forgave him for this situation very quickly, but this behavior from Ciel continued and went unaddressed.

I witnessed Ciel manipulate her on many different occasions, and he was comfortable doing it with me present. Oftentimes, when they would argue, he would briefly mention the argument to their mutual friends, but he would always paint her out to be the one in the wrong. This led to many of our mutual friends hating Kyuumi for a while, and we even had a group chat made for the purpose of discussing what we thought was Kyuumi being an abuser. After a while, and after multiple friends cut Kyuumi off due to her supposed abusive behavior, Ciel confirmed himself on a call with me that he had been portraying her like that with the goal of isolating her. I tried to speak up and tell him how wrong that is, but I was threatened with never hearing from either of them again.

I didn't believe that he would make her stop talking to me, but I didn't take any chances and instead spoke to a friend who went on to confront him. After xe confronted Ciel, xe was blocked by both of them and removed from all of their group chats and servers. As far as I can tell, this is still something he has her do (cutting off people who call him out or who he doesn't like).

Ciel's emotional and physical mistreatment and abuse of Kyuumi is something that I have kept my mouth shut about due to the fear of being cut out of Kyuumi's life, but that ended up happening about a month ago anyways. I no longer have contact with her or Ciel, but given some of the things I have heard about their relationship, this abuse is still going on, and Kyuumi has begun to claim it is consensual.

I am not expecting this to be spread or have much attention paid to it, but I made this because I am tired of being quiet.

Thank you for your time.

[tyrannuspitch]

How do you HC the conversation where Thor finds out Loki is a Jotun foundling went?

Oh this is a VERY interesting question, and not one I have a full answer to yet.

First of all, since some people have very understandably suggested otherwise - I do think Thor knows. No, he never acknowledges Loki's species specifically, he just talks about "adoption"... but A) I don't think Odin would send Thor out in The Avengers without telling him everything he told Loki, because otherwise he'd be handing Loki a way to manipulate Thor; and B) Thor looks *decidedly* anguished (actually close to tears!) when Loki is talking about ~mindless beasts pretending to be people~ in The Avengers, which would make no sense if Loki were really only talking about Bruce, a mortal Thor's only just met.

So I think it's clear that Thor knows that Loki is Jotun and understands that internalised space-racism is a huge part of what's "wrong with" Loki. He just doesn't know how to help, so, in classic Odin fashion, he's avoiding it for fear of making it worse. (And probably also wrestling with his own lingering space-racism, guilt, denial, etc.)

As for the conversation itself... I'm not sure. I do think it happened very promptly, because Odin was right there and Thor was devastated and confused and would demand Answers. What the hell just happened to my brother?!

I think realising that he's been lied to his entire life by both his parents would be a major blow to Thor, after his trust has already been shattered by his father apparently leaving him on Earth to die and by, uh, pretty much everything Loki did. On its own, the lie wouldn't be as powerful to Thor as it was to Loki, but in context... Thor's entire world has been turned upside-down repeatedly in a few days. He lost his home and identity, he thought his father was dead, he thought his brother was going to kill him, now his brother IS dead and perhaps he never even knew him... He just has no stability left at all.

And I think that's why he expresses such faith in Odin in their final conversation: "There will never be a wiser king than you, nor a better father." It seems like a really odd thing to say after everything that's just happened, and a lot of people get outraged on Loki's behalf, but... I think it makes sense, psychologically speaking. From Thor's perspective, questioning Odin's will was what nearly ruined his life and ended his brother's. The lies plus the exile make it suddenly really clear just how far Odin is willing to go to enforce his power over his children, and Thor is the only child he has left. What further disasters could further resistance bring? So Thor gives in, and chooses to believe what he's giving into must be good and wise and necessary, because he just can't go on otherwise.

(Thor often reminds me of a quote I once read about how abused children hating themselves is really a survival strategy, because their parents have such power over them that they're effectively their entire world. So, from the child's perspective: if the child is "bad" but the parents are "good", then it is at least within the child's power to try to be better; but if the parents are "bad" while the child is "good", then the world itself is broken, and the situation is hopeless.)

So... I don't think Thor would be angry. I think he's too shocked and shaken to express anger, or to really blame anyone but himself. But I think Thor might still have a hard time accepting that this is the truth, as in... believing, understanding, and coming to terms with it.

Like... Thor has definitely not unlearnt all his prejudice against Jotuns in a handful of days on a completely different subject realm. He's probably not far off from where he started at all - sure, he's seen a few Jotuns face-to-face, so they're probably realer to him now, and he wouldn't accept Loki's plan for total annihilation... But in his mind, they're still enemies, still a grotesque, frightening Other, almost certainly still monsters.

So hearing that Loki is and always has been a Jotun will be really, really hard for Thor. He's going to be in utter turmoil over this, and there isn't any comfortable answer to settle on.

So... maybe Loki's not really Jotun. Okay, he can't see any reason why his parents would lie again, but maybe it's only true on a technical level, maybe Loki's really more like "one of us" than "one of them", on the inside. (But what actually makes a Jotun a monster? Is it behaviour? Culture? Biology? Is it some inherent property of their souls?)

Or maybe Jotuns aren't monsters, not all of them, not inherently. But everyone on Asgard has always acted like they are. If this is true, Thor has blood on his hands, and so do his parents, and his friends, and their entire society, the society Thor is responsible for and beholden to.

Or maybe Loki is a monster. (Was a monster.) He always seemed like a person, and Thor loved him, but apparently Thor barely knew Loki at all. In the end, Loki violently rejected Thor's love and did monstrous things, and it seems like he was lying very well for a very long time before that. Maybe Thor has been played for a fool, and he never had a brother at all.

Or maybe Loki was a monster, but he didn't want to be one. Maybe it wasn't entirely his choice; he was delicate, and their parents were trying to protect him, but Thor was careless and he broke him (by revealing his heritage; by leaving him alone in a crisis; by whatever long-standing failure he still doesn't understand that made Loki hate him so much and so personally in the end.)

Out of these, I think Thor ultimately settles on a mixture of #1 and #4. But there's so much going on here (grief for Loki; anger at him; fear of him; guilt in completely contradictory directions) and no way to really work through it or understand what's true that I think it takes a very long time. And there's probably a great deal of rain in Asgard in the meantime.

--

Anyway. This is... a very long reply that manages to avoid ever really being an answer. But here are some musings on Thor's state of mind in the wake of this revelation.

[supercalime]

I can’t believe I found people who think about this the exact same way as I do. I don’t get these hardcore buddie stans who suddenly try to make it look like buckTommy shipper are the toxic ones. I haven’t seen a single BuckTommy shipper who was rude without a reason (maybe a bit defensive about their CANON ship). Whereas I’ve seen plenty of incredibly toxic buddie stans who insult everyone who doesn’t ship their ship or share their opinions.

Another thing and don’t get me wrong Im not defending anyone. But I’ve seen many people heavily bullying the marisol actress because she’s apparently homophobic (not saying she isn’t or is) and wanting her to be gone beacause of this reason but totally ignore the alleged racism of ryan (again not saying he is racist or not, i dont know them personally) just because he is part of their beloved ship. By their logic Ryan should leave the show too.

Hey anon, it took me some time to answer your ask (chaotic life stuff lol) but I’m glad to finally have time to talk about this first part with you.

I’ll preface by saying I won’t get involved in actor drama, no matter how true or toxic it is because I don’t have enough information nor am I qualified to talk about the issues they mishandled. I’ll just say that, no matter who does bad things, they should be held accountable.

Okay, back to the main point: yes, it’s very strange how b*ddie st*ns are behaving towards the canon bi!buck thing. Both with people who ship bucktommy but also with the creators and actors on the show. Regardless if they are right or not about b*ddie being canon, this is not how you act with entertainment, specially with the people giving the content.

I hate to bash but it looks and sounds a lot like a toddler throwing a tantrum because they didn’t get a specific toy.

And toddlers only throw tantrums because they are brand new humans who are learning how to behave. They don’t know any better so they react with outbursts and repeated demands because it’s the only way they know to get the attention of the person taking care of them.

If I’m not mistaken, the main audience for the show is 18-45. NO ONE here should be yelling in comment sections “we want buddie! we want buddie! we want buddie!” as if they would immediately get it. It’s not how it works and it’s frankly embarrassing to see a bunch of adults acting like that for everyone to see.

And I can’t stress it enough, I’m not putting myself on a high ground here and saying I’m a better person by shipping bucktommy, as I’m sure there might be a percentage of fans out there being rude and annoying as well. But at least I’m keeping my conscience clear by not acting like me shipping two characters is something big enough in my life to ruin my enjoyment of a whole show in case my favorite ship doesn’t become canon.

I hate how fandoms behave as if they can have control over the content they are consuming. We aren’t entitled to anything and if there is supposed to be ANY discourse about which character was supposed to end with, that should happen AFTER the show ended! The story isn’t over yet! So why are b*ddie st*ns so stressed? If a show is making you this angry and demanding, please step aside a little, give it some distance because that’s not how consuming content is supposed to make you feel.

And I say that last part with sincerity because I too got way too involved with fandom discourse in the past, to the point that I had to distance myself from certain shows because being that involved made me upset.

Im just tired at this point you know. Im trying to protect myself as much as possible. Im not in the bird app, I don’t follow the show or the actors on social media, im avoiding interviews like the plague. All I want from this experience is to watch the show, gather my thoughts, form my opinions, log onto tumblr and reblog the cute stuff I see about my favorite ship without having to worry about whatever the hell is going on outside my pretty little bubble

[theanxiousghostartist]

TMAGP 27 Spoilers

(Theories and reactions)

Ooooo this was a good one!

Pre Case (Lena, Gwen, and Sam):

Lena is freaking out about the Minister's visit, and Gwen is doing so on ger behalf. I think this is Gwen trying to get closer to Lena and earn her trust. I'm definitely riding on my theory that she is planning on destroying the OIAR from the inside out - Gertrude style, with her interactions thusfar.

Lena really doesn't want Colin to return. It makes sense, but it's still interesting.

Lena also doesn't want any extra oversight - she seems very scared of the idea. We already know that Lena is afraid of her superiors to a degree, so I wonder if this could cause her to get on their "bad side."

Sam's in a good mood because of Celia, he really does like her!

I like how we can tell Gwen is drained from dealing with Lena and preparing for the Minister's visit. Phenomenal voice acting!!

Gwen giving Alice hard tasks is so on brand;I love their interactions.

Case (Augustus):

A Jonah case????

So these are excerpts from the Mangus Institute's Founder's journal/diary. I'm going to assume this is Jonah since the Institute's name remains the same. He is getting frustrated with the failures in the Institute's experiments with alchemy and transmutation. Specifically, he mentions, "...and-thus far are still unable to effect transmutations beyond those endeavors we each undertook alone." This reminds me of how Jonah, as well as some of his friends/partners (like Hailey), were marked by the Fears, which led them to further investigate/worship the fears.

Jonah runs into a Clarence (a sort of cab) of the Stranger (and perhaps the End or Lonely), which he avoids due to odd features (like the cabby only lookinb straight forward), and watches someone else get in and disappear. He runs into this again and again sees a man disappear, following a trail of blood to a hidden alleyway, where he finds the man's coat. He convinces a young coworker (who he thought was making some of his older friends "soft hearted"), Archibald Cameron, to ride in the cab and take notes. He mentions that Cameron "...loss of skin, and it's clear from his handwriting exactly when his eyes departed from his skull." This makes me lean towards the End more than the Lonley in conjuction with the Stranger because it reminds me of its domain during the Eyepolcolypse. Jonah basically discovers the fears, noting that Cameron wrote how he saw that his increase in fear led to the Clarence "eating him" faster. Jonah leaves off by basically saying that these "forces" could help them achieve their goals, whatever they might be.

I wonder if Jonah and Cameron is a parallel to Gertude and Michael. Both Jonah and Gertrude sacrificed a young member of their staff to a fear in order to learn more about it. While Jonah did it out of pure curiosity, Gertrude did it to stop the Spiral's ritual. While trying to learn about it wasn't her first intention, it still was an intention, as it acted as sort of a test to see if outside involvement in a ritual could stop it.

Theory: Based on what we know, I think that Jonah's goal is the opposite of his in TMA: he wants to create a utopia instead of a hellscape. However, his motivation is the same: he wants to be a god. My theory is that TMAGP!Jonah and the others want to make themselves gods of a utopia, with "gods of love" (as Gerry put it in TMA), helping them rule over this. So, while his goal is the opposite of TMA!Jonah, he still has the same characterization and motivations, although the technique to achieve this is different, as TMAGP!Jonah is using alchemy. Because of the involvement of alchemy, I assume TMAGP!Jonah is trying to bypass the alchemic rule of equivalent exchange "Humankind cannot gain anything without first giving something in return To obtain, something of equal value must be lost." (This is a quote from Full Metal Alchemist XD).

Jonah is most definitely still Eye aligned.

Post - Case (Alice and Gwen):

Alice canonically said she was trans!!!!!! 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️

I love this interaction (I feel like I say this about every Alice/Gwen interaction, lol. I love how their personalities contrast!!)

Gwen getting information from an email with gibberish??? I wonder if it's Jonah since Jon signed his email to Sam...

Oh! The documents are important, and she still has them, and she's lying to Alice... these have to be Institute documents. Since she knows Sam is into this stuff, I wonder if she will bring it up to him. Or perhaps she will tell Alice at a later point? I really like how she automatically goes to Alice for this sort of thing!

Post - Case (Sam, Celia, and Alice):

Ooo Helen's papers!

I wonder if the Institute needed to see the constellations. Like they know they're there, but they need to make sure it is a clear view for some sort of alchemy experiment.

Perhaps the perchloroethylene machines are to be used in treating fabrics as preparation for an experiment?

Sam and Celia communicating!!!!

So they want to pursue their relationship further? Oooo, interesting! I do appreciate Celia letting Sam know that Jack is her number 1 priority. I wonder if this relationship is going further because it helps her manipulate Sam more easily? (Also, when I say this in my posts, I mean it as something she is doing, but not negatively. I am rooting for her to be as manipulative as she wants/needs to be!)

Hilltop Centre???? As an outreach center??? Ohh, I wonder if this is where Celia is getting pulled to at night. Perhaps, it was an "outreach center" to the fears or other universes?

Trevor Herbert??????? As the Minister???? I did not have that on my bingo card!

Trevor Herbert was the vampire hunter in TMA who partnered with Julia Montauk in America. Both were aligned with the Hunt. Julia was killed by Daisy when she became an Avatar, Trevor was killed by Basira in the Hunt domain, while they were tracking Daisy (Trevor wanted revenge, Basira wanted to fulfill Daisy's final wishes). Perhaps the higher-ups and Lena's superiors have experienced hunting avatars, and that's how they got them under control? Maybe Lena is aligned with the Hunt as well? (I previously theorized that she was Web aligned, but both could be true)

Yay! Alice is getting involved. Hopefully, they will find a way to stop [Error].

Celia seemed mad when she realized the two went into "The Archivist's" office. She made a statement at the Institute - when Jon wasn't there about Agnes's ghost, I wonder if she saw something in Jon's office? Or maybe she's realizing that [Error] isn't necessarily Jon?

This episode was so good, and we got a lot of information from it!

I want to add a little note here that my theory posts may be shorter and/or at different times because I'm starting college next week and might not have time to listen 😭

[blueskiestarot]

Hello blueskies tarot! First of all I would like to say that I really love your readings and I’m finally caught up on all of them heheh. 🌷🌷

But recently I’ve been having a really strange experience and I would love to share my story and hopefully get insight or an answer from someone reading this and to see if someone had the same experience.

I’ve been having a huge crushes and infatuation on someone who was inaccessible to me, but the weird thing I always kept receiving signs and messages that this person is for me and that they will make a move towards me really soon, like for example in one of your readings it said they are coming towards me and the description fit this person exactly along with other signs like repeating numbers.

This is not the first time this thing happens to me, it happened before where I would start receiving many signs related to a certain person telling me that they are my soulmate and then after a few weeks a revelation happens and I figure out that this person is not for me. This has made me feel very hopeless, stuck and delusional. I felt like I can’t trust the universe and that all the guidance I received from spirit is deceptive. Honestly I feel like there’s something wrong. Why does spirit keep showing me signs and syncs that lead to a dead end? It happened several times before, where I discovered the truth of the situation and then the signs stopped then kept coming back referring to another. Is spirit leading me on?

This has been wrecking my mental health really bad, I’m starting to feel hopeless because I just keep engaging in limerence.

The last time this happened I frantically opened an online tarot deck and picked a random spread I got a card, but I can’t remember which one that said what seems to be random might not be random at all.

The only conclusions I can come up with are either that I’m interpreting the signs wrong, or I’m engaging with a deceptive spirit that’s pretending to be my spirit guide or in a false matrix.

However I really doubt that I’m interpreting the signs wrong because all of them have keys that point to something specific about each person.

Thank you if you’ve read this far. I really don’t know what to do, I feel so hopeless about my love life, and I’m scared to believe any signs that I receive from the universe :(

Hi, love!

I'm sorry you're going through that and feeling confused. I hope I can help! Just know that these thoughts are purely my opinion and my own experiences. ♥️

So, first of all, when you start to feel like your mental health is being negatively impacted by readings, that is a clear sign that it's time to take a break from reading and/or watching readings for awhile. I would suggest taking a week off and trying to avoid pick a pile readings as much as possible. You can always come back to them after that and see if things have changed or if you are in a better head space. Never consume media that is making you feel bad in any way.

Secondly, it's SOOOOOO important to use your discernment when reading pick a pile readings. These readings rely heavily on your intuition because you're picking the pile you are intuitively drawn to. So, if you know that a connection with someone is not possible, I think it would be safe to say that the reading is not for you even if it sounds like the person you are connecting with. Keep in mind that many people pick the same pile as you. So, they may be dealing with similar people. Just think of how many people you've met that could be described using the same description, you know? So, just be super weary of if it really sounds like that person or if it's a general description and you just want it to be them. Again, it's all about being self-aware and using your discernment.

It's also important to note when you are infatuated with someone as opposed to having a real connection with them. If it's someone you've never talked to and the reading says they are thinking of marriage with you, that's a clear indicator that the reading is not for you. So, use your judgement to know when messages are for based on what is going on in your connection. One of my favorite readers on YouTube is Shadow Play Tarot and she always includes a "delulu checkpoint" in her videos when she says something that she feels may mislead someone into giving into delusions. It's just a checkpoint to sort of bring you back to reality and check in with your current situation so that you can ask yourself "does this really resonate with me or do I just want it to?" Readings should never tell you how you feel or what's going to happen. They should simply confirm what you already know and/or feel. So, for example, if I had a connection that seemed to have ended on bad terms and the other person seemed to hate me but a reading said that they were going to come back in a week, I would ask myself "is that really true based on what I know to be true?" I hope that makes sense. I guess what I'm trying to say is that you should see evidence in real life of what the reading is trying to tell you or it should confirm your intuitive feelings.

Always check in with yourself and observe how a reading is making you feel. If it's triggering or doesn't confirm what you already feel, then it's not for you.

Also, detachment is your friend. Sometimes we're too close to the situation and can't see what is actually going on. I feel like we can manifest what could be mistaken as signs from spirit by thinking heavily of someone. So, if you are constantly thinking of a person and are completely lost in the sauce when it comes to them, you could potentially manifest seeing signs of them in your outside world. Try detaching from them for a bit by distracting yourself with other things. If you're still seeing the signs, then they are likely from Spirit.

Lastly, in my own opinion, I do not think that Spirit is above lying to us in order for us to learn a lesson or to get us to do what they want. So, if you are meant to learn a specific lesson from someone but they aren't "your person", I fully believe they will lie and trick you into believing that person is for you until you've learned that lesson. Same goes if someone IS for you. If you're too attached and f*cking up the connection by overthinking, being super fearful, or doubtful, they will trick you into believing you need to let it go in order to get you to detach so that your energy is not sabotaging things. So, my point is that Spirit can and will manipulate you into believing something so that they can guide you toward learning a specific lesson or toward doing a certain action. It's all done in the name of your highest good but that doesn't change that the fact that they are lying and manipulating you. It's not malicious at all. So, if you do feel like you are being lied to in a malicious way like there is a spirit posing as your spirit guide, make sure you are clearing the energy out of your space regularly and make sure you are protecting your energy as well.

I hope that helps somewhat! And if anyone else has any advice, that would so helpful! 🫶 Love, Tara

[edsbacktattoo]

ok i was kind of purposefully avoiding the details of the gravy basket theory because it's sounded so dumb but holy shit i really didn't know the extent of it. sorry in advance to be rambling in your inbox.

i thought if i wanted to talk about it i should read the post in full but honestly that was a struggle on its own. it just completely misunderstands the way the show uses ed experiencing purgatory as metaphor. like, the innkeeper does not show us this sort of wish fulfilling dream state at all, and ed externalizing his self hatred into the figment of hornigold is a simple, concise idea that the show specifically goes out of its way to make clear. episode 8 just doesn't have this. like, you'd have to make the argument that literally EVERY CHARACTER PRESENT IN THE EPISODE is somehow representative of an aspect of stede's psyche. it's not just a matter of him projecting his desires into a falsely constructed space, it's a matter of internal issues manifesting from the subconscious, which is what the show has established. it's particularly bizarre to me that they don't make any effort to argue what izzy is meant to represent in this theory, or what him dying could mean symbolically (which is. y'know. the point of the gravy basket as it's been explored). also there's just a complete disregard for ed's arc in the finale which is. eugh. come on.

and this is all still being generous in taking the idea of the "gravy basket" at face value. like, it feels a little ridiculous to even entertain the idea enough to try to argue it. i'm just so baffled.

(it did make me think about psychonauts to the point of wanting to replay it, so. i guess there's that.)

PRECISELY!!!!!!!!! don’t apologise for rambling in my inbox when you’re so correct my dear friend <3

i can’t believe that this theory has such a vice grip on some people. when it first appeared on my dash (and it did, not because a mutual reblogged it, but bc i follow the ofmd tag, and tumblr is evil and gave me the post bc it thought it was being helpful) i thought it was. a joke. i thought the op was having a laugh. but the more i read the more i started to worry. it takes a very distinct lack of media comprehension to come up with something like this.

now, i want to make it clear that i do feel for the people who enjoy izzy normally. like the folks who just like him because he’s interesting and fucked up and strange. the people that don’t woobify him, ya know? those guys are all right.

but the kind of devotion that leads to behaviour like this? threatening and belittling the writers of the show? calling ed violent and thinking he’s going to be an abuser to stede, the man he’s in love with? if you genuinely believe that then there is something seriously wrong with you, and i think you ought to look introspectively <3

also, as a side note, a large criticism i’ve seen for season 2 is poor writing (which is just not at all correct) but to make up for said “poor writing” the theories that people are whipping up are genuinely like. worse? imagine if they did the gravy basket thing again. gravy basket 2: electric boogaloo. that would be bad writing. that would be lazy!!

no, what they did instead was deliberate and careful and beautiful and hopeful. open ended and bittersweet. and yet. AND YET!!!! you get folks trying to cope so bad it makes them look stupid.

and this is all that i will say on the matter. tho, ive never played psychonauts and this might be the thing that makes me dive into that :)

[paragonrobits]

What are your thoughts on a certain online video essayist’s hot take that “the biggest crime to the Jedi is giving a shit”?

I’m personally not that fond of the Jedi myself, but I’m still curious to know what your thoughts are on a hot take like that.

In all honesty I'm sort of curious why but the other hand I'm not sure I want to know, given how defensive I think I am about the Jedi. "Don't ask questions if you might not like the answer" and all that!

the joke response is that I want to say "CLEARLY SOMEONE WASN'T PAYING ATTENTION TO THE SERIES" or something a bit more cranky, since after so long of almost every single comment about the Jedi being to imply their way of life was inherently wrong or misunderstanding the concept of attachment despite it being an incredibly simple concept to understand after maybe less than five minutes searching up attachment in Buddhist philosophy or... the actions of every on-screen Jedi, its just plain exhausting dealing with the fandom. So, in the interests of sincerity, I'm not about to do anything like that.

So. This kind of take. I'm not sure who said it (but I'm assuming its probably the sort of reviewers I've already complained about, or who think that the Dark Side needs to be treated fairly), but its by far a common attitude in fandom.

It's also explicitly, inherently wrong.

A lot of people don't understand what 'attachment' is, in this context. Its common to refer to having an emotional connection to something, or caring about something, as being attached. This is not what attachment means, in this context; Lucas has always been very blunt about how its more or less directly lifted from Buddhist philosophy, and the Jedi are for the most part pretty much a mix of Buddhist monks, the romantic idea of the wandering knight in shining armor, and samurai movies. In this context, attachment refers to the fear of losing something, of literally being tied to it, driven to possess or claw at it, and suffering because you're so scared of losing them.

That drives people to do terrible things because of that fear, or to suffer terribly once they DO lose them. Because they will. All things end; relationships end, romances die, friendships fade away or someone involved passes away. All is transitory, and the inability to truly accept that and the pain or tragedy that results is what I think attachment refers to, in this context.

The Jedi accept that this is so. But because attachment is conflated with caring, you get bad takes like this ad nausuem! And to be clear, its wrong.

Part of it is also that the Jedi do not permit romantic involvements, though the specifics about what this means is pretty fluid; we see that Jedi have romantic feelings for others without it seeming to be a big deal, but the most logical conclusion is that they're not allowed to get married while being part of the Jedi order. and people obsess so much over romance that they feel that not allowing marriage while in the order (which is a VERY COMMON THING in orders like this) is some kind of crime. It's not hard; you want to get married, leave the order. At its most basic, it means you can't prioritize your romance or their well being above your duty.

'Giving a shit' is basically what the Jedi are all about. And its something I think the people who think the Dark Side has anything good in it refuse to see, because they conflate what the Jedi don't allow with Good Things. But the Jedi are commited to peace and justice in the universe; their calling is to help others, at their own expense; to battle tyrants, to create diplomatic solutions in order to avoid violence when at all possible. To refrain from striking the first blow, to act only in defense of oneself or another.

They very much do give a shit. Compassion, mercy and helping others is the core of the philosophy; to be in harmony with the living Force, not to try to control it but to accept it as an ally. Part of the dislike for the Jedi is likely because of Lucas' writing direction being... not the best, and often very unclear or hard to figure out. So much problems have been caused SPECIFICALLY because of the wording being weird and not as explicit as it could have been; attachment as in being tormented by inevitability, not attachment as in informal uses of the word.

(Also there's people who think that instructing children in a world view that is not so much a religion as objective truth through the lens of the Force is indoctrination, but that's another topic.)

The flipside of it, of course, is people thinking the Sith can be good, and the Dark Side is better because you can be selfish. Both are wrong.

The first part is that the Dark Side is often assumed to be inherently good or better than what the Jedi offer because it relates to anger, desire and, THEY assume, romantic love. In this context, none of these are applied in a positive sense, as the Dark Side is opposed to DISCIPLINE. To self control. To not acting on your impulses the second you have them. The Dark Side is mostly about suffering; immersing yourself in the worst parts of yourself, simmering in pain and hate and becoming consumed by it, until its all you have. The Light Side is all about harmony; the connection between things, compassion and non-romantic love. The Dark Side is the absence of those things, and its all about control. About POWER and the use of that power.

People love to go on about how 'the sith code is so much BETTER, PASSION WILL SET ME FREE'. First, possibly it means passion in the archaic term, as in 'agonizing pain and suffering'. But if that's not, what does it MEAN by passion? By all accounts, its a LACK of control. Of feral, uncontrolled feelings and desire, of being completely driven by your feelings and nothing else, just unfettered selfishness and compelled to act upon a thought or feeling as soon as you have them.

Have you ever had an intrusive thought? Or a horrible desire festering in your brain? What would happen if you were COMPELLED to act on those thoughts the moment you had them?

There's a reason I say that you can't be a good Sith. Every single canonical Sith is a horrific person to the core; their philosophy all but demands the absence of compassion, restraint and encourages hatred and selfishness. Anger might be a tool, but unrestrained hatred consumes you. Passion, without restraint or direction, is just feral lashing around.

I remember years and years ago, I lived with my sister. Her boyfriend at the time was the kind of guy who took pride in being an asshole and outright said so, multiple times. He had no sense of restraint and was casually, violently abusive. Regularly erupting into screaming fits at his children for being mildly annoying or their beds falling apart because he put them together wrong, and most famously, one time he got furious at my sister for buying him a christmas present when he hadn't bought one for her, so it made him feel bad, so he threw a glass ashtray at her head so hard she almost had to go to the hospital.

I bring this up not as a sob story of some kind but to illustrate a point. That kind of lack of self control, self important egotism and violent impulse are the inevitable result of Sith doctrine. The Sith may imagine that they give a shit, but in practice they're self-absorbed, violent assholes who only really have hatred and ambition. And heck, are so violently prone to backstabbing each other over the tiniest gain that they couldn't stop backstabbing each other while they were in the middle of a massive war. The Rule of Two exists more or less because of a combination of their survival of the fittest mentality ("whoever survives must DESERVE to live by being stronger or smarter") and because they couldn't stop betraying each other so they wound up making it a feature instead of a bug in their outlook.

The Sith code, the famous "passion shall set me free" bit, was created for the game Knights of the Old Republic. It was, by word of the author, expressly based on fascist recruitment tactics meant to make young people feel powerful and fall for their rhetoric. Everyone who obsesses over the Sith code has fallen for the bait.

Another example: there is a former Sith in the Knights of the Old Republic games, who acts as a mentor of sorts and while not a Jedi, does seem to be a walking criticism of the idea of Grey Jedi who use the Dark Side and the Light Side at the same time, as this character comes off as 'too much of an asshole to be Jedi, not enough to be a true Sith'. They absolutely despise it whenver you do any kind of compassionate thing, criticizing you for working for ecologically minded aliens, giving money to homeless people, or not just callously using everyone around you or manipulating people to serving your goals. This character doesn't approve of randomly killing people just because you can, but this character DOES callously penetrate the minds of people in a way that is explicitly painful.

Limited use of the Dark Side is still use of the Dark Side. Jabbing a fork into a light socket only a little bit will still severely hurt you.

In conclusion; the Jedi are ALL ABOUT giving a shit, its the core of their philosophy, the people who obsess over the assumed good aspects of the Dark Side need to read upon on attachment and actually take a look at all canonical Sith and contemplate that maybe idolizing the faction whose iconic technique is a torture beam might not be a great idea.

(Also while lots of people think the Jedi brought their own doom with stuff like being critical of Anakin when he was brought to them, it reads to me more like 'given that he wound up becoming the biggest mass murderer in history and the boot-stepping enforcer of a galactic tyrant who wound up murdering the children in the temple, Yoda was absolutely right')

[queen--kenobi]

Can you explain more about this Tymon and Elayna dynamic? I'm curious how this all gets going. Like I've picked up on bits and pieces and Elayna's deep hatred of the Lannisters, SO I WOULD LIKE TO LEARN MORE

Ehehehehe yeeesssss time to reintroduce my terrible awful evil son

So. Tymon is Jason and Tyland's younger brother. He's a year older than Elayna. Tymon is... well. The best way I can describe Tymon is That Annoying Rich White Guy? Like in a modern AU he's the lacrosse player who got into an Ivy league because his family is a legacy family. He is actually smart and charming on the surface but underneath all that, he's absolutely awful. The type of guy who's never heard no in his life and has a meltdown because of it

Elayna gets warded to the Lannisters when she's about 8 or 9. Alon has his first major sickness so Elayna’s older brother sends her to the Lannisters. Since Tymon is about the same age as her, they do gravitate towards each other. When they hit 12/13, Tymon realizes he's attracted to Elayna. And being an entitled 13 year old decides yeah, he's going to marry Elayna

It gets complicated because they're still basically kids. Elayna doesn't necessarily know what she really wants or likes. Also she thinks she knows him, and this is the first guy who's shown interest in her in a not overtly creepy way. So she's receptive at first and she ignores some red flags that crop up

I haven't exactly figured out what the specific thing that makes her go "wait. Hold up" is yet? At least, not for canon. Based on what I'm thinking for other AUs, like him branding someone in the Western AU bc lbr that's some shit the Lannisters would do, it has to be Bad. I have some ideas floating around. But yeah. Tymon does something that is a very "oh fuck he's dangerous, and he will hurt me" thing. Elayna had been having doubts anyway, but this just freaks her out. She starts spending less time with him and in general trying to avoid him

Elayna also notices he doesn't care about her in a love way but a possession way? There's some discussion of her marrying a Tarbeck, and Tymon flips the fuck out over it. It's very much in an abusive partner type of way even though he and Elayna were never technically together

Elayna tries avoiding him but a) Tymon has made it clear he's the only one allowed to marry Elayna and will get violent over it and b) Elayna is literally living with his family so there's no one she can turn to. Since Elayna is saying no, Tymon bounces between love bombing Elayna and trying to make Elayna’s live a living hell

Mind you. She's 12? 13? When this starts. And she endures 3-4 years of psychological abuse. And unfortunately she does have to learn to be like the Lannisters to survive during this time period. The only person on her side seems to be her dad. Seban, her older brother, is even kinda like "what's the big deal? It'd be a great opportunity" blah blah blah

Eventually Alon gets Elayna under the guise of taking her back to Castamere, probably so as "not to tempt Tymon" or w/e. But as soon as they're on the road Alon tells Elayna he's set everything up so Elayna can live in KL as either Helaena or Jaenna's lady-in-waiting. Obviously once Tymon finds out he's on his way to KL but like. Tripling down on everything because how dare she run away

(Bonus fun fact: in the modern AU they go to high school together, they have this weird relationship of like... they're not actually dating but also they kind of are? They keep on saying no they're just friends but they make out at parties. But then the next day in class they'll be at each other's throats for who has the best grade and being super competitive in a nasty way. They end up deciding to go to prom together but... They end up sleeping together and being each other's firsts. Which then less than a week later Tymon tells Elayna no he's not taking her to prom, someone like him doesn't take girls like her to prom, and anyway he's had a girlfriend this whole time. And he does this several days before the SAT/ACT. Which Elayna realizes later he timed it in an attempt to make her so upset she'd completely bomb the test

Bonus bonus: unfortunately. Tymon is Hot.

This is his FC, Brandon Sklenar. Imagine him but blond)

[sleepingdeath-light]

stardust cookie + face sitting hcs ; 18+

requested by ; 🐜 anon (14/05/23)

fandom(s) ; cookie run

fandom masterlist(s) ; hub | specific

character(s) ; stardust cookie

outline ; “hello yes hello yeah

can i get uhhhh... stardust.. facesitting.. smut headcanons.. 🤕

like he just, eat reader out like that, is that aloud

but like maybe stardust just randomly suggested it and is like super down for it and reader is kinda a little nervous

fem reader

i confirm that i am over 18

also can i be 🐜 anon?”

warning(s) ; sexually explicit content, oral (fem receiving), face sitting

minors and ageless blogs will be blocked

he was the last person you expected to bring up a topic like this because of how generally inexperienced he is when it comes to sex — hell, you weren’t even sure where he could have learned about it from

so needless to say you were more than a bit startled when your boyfriend turned to you, straight-faced, whilst you were sat reading on the settee and asked if you’d like to try sitting on his face

the question threw you of for very obvious reasons, but stardust cookie took your silence for confusion and elaborated on his reasons for wanting to try it

he loves going down on you, he loves pleasuring you in general, and he’s more than strong enough to hold up your weight — and he wants to see how it would impact your experience as well as his

and you’re still nervous, because this is fully uncharted territory, but he’s insistent

of course he gives you an out, he’s not pressuring you, he’s just making it clear that you shouldn’t be nervous or anxious on his account because he wouldn’t suggest something he didn’t want to do

then, after some more back and forth and the establishing of a safe action (which stardust knew he wouldn’t need to use), you were on your bed, completely nude and hovering over your fully clothed boyfriend’s face

you felt a bit bad for not being able to pleasure him in return, but he brushed it off by assuring you that he didn’t want any pleasure for himself at the moment and he just wanted to eat you out

and then, finally, you lowered yourself down onto his face and tried to let go of your inhibitions as he delivered you to your climax

the first few stripes that he licked along your slit were faint and quick, testing the waters as he looked up at you with those beautiful eyes — gauging your reactions to see what felt best and what to avoid — before he settled into something much more confident and present

damn near pressing you against his face with how tight his grip was on your waist, only allowing you the room to squirm and roll your hips against his mouth as he licked and sucked and kissed his way along and inside of your pussy

licking thick stripes along the length of your sex with the flat of his tongue

thrusting his tongue into your dripping hole and somehow managing to find your g-spit with every penetration — seemingly going off of muscle memory

wrapping his lips around your clit and sucking hard

or, if his mouth was occupied lower down, bumping the bundle of nerves with his nose as he ate you out

eventually getting so into the moment that he closed his eyes and started to groan and moan against you as he devoured your cunt and greedily, eagerly, drank up all of your juices

one hand slowly migrating upwards from your hips to start playing with your naked breasts — groping, pinching and rolling your nipples and generally doing anything to get you to make more noise

revelling in the way you kept grinding down against his tongue and moaning and pleading for him

complying with your every wish as best he could because, at the end of the day, this was about you more than it was him

so he went faster, went as deep as he could, sucked harder on your clit and sloppily stimulated your sweet pussy until your hands were buried in his soft white hair, pulling it tight as you screamed his name and soaked his mouth and chin

even his eyelashes, just squirting and sobbing and whimpering and moaning like a whore as he tenderly guided you through your orgasm

with a skilful tongue and stunning eyes that drank in your expressions as you trembled and shook and sobbed your way through your overwhelming end

only stopping when you were starting to get too overstimulated — slowly pulling away and kissing each of your thighs before carefully, gingerly, lifting you off of his face and laying you down beside him

keeping an eye on you to ensure that you were recovering safely as he spoke, calm as he usually was, about wanting to do that again soon

and if you were lucid enough to understand him, you’d have agreed

[actualaster]

I really want to get into tales of symphonia because you have increased my background exposure to it enough but is the anime a decent place to start??? Or should I go find ye olde emulator?

I haven't actually checked the anime out myself, so somebody who's actually seen it should be better able to tell you but from what I gather it's better to give the game a play if you can.

The original game is available on GameCube, PS2 (Japanese-only), PS3, PS4/5, PC, Xbox One, and Switch--though from what I've heard and seen the Switch version is a mess of a port with genuine major performance issues. So you've got options for which version you're interested in (regardless of if you emulate or not). Just, like I said, maybe steer clear of the Switch version lol.

The sequel didn't ever get an anime adaptation as far as I'm aware, and the game is sadly only available via Wii and PS3 (and considering the quality of the TOS Switch port, I'm thinking it doged a bullet there lol). The PS3 version is good, no major technical issues in it or anything.

The sequel game did also get a manga that was part prequel, part interqeuel which ran in the Tales Of magazine (then got published in 2 volumes), of which there is a scanlation though I would suggest avoiding that unless you play the game first due to massive spoilers. But if you do check the sequel game out, it fleshes out a character significantly vs their in-game appearance (which makes sense for plot reasons I won't spoil for you here!)

The sequel is personally my favorite game, I liked the cast more than those in the original though many people like the original more (and an annoyingly large number of them are very rude about making sure people know it). But I would definitely suggest, if possible, checking out the original game first because it will give a lot more depth to things. Though you definitely can jump into the sequel if desired and not be totally lost. But it will dramatically change your perspective on various early-game events depending on what you know of thr first game and it's cast.

That said, expect it to be a fair time sink (especially if you want to try for the multiple ending variants--they aren't for the most part wildly different but there is one specific route that will change if a character kives or dies) and also as it's 20 years old now, it'll have some various technical limitations on the gameplay that aren’t present in more current entries in the series.

The sequel isn't as much of a time sink--however, while the restructuring of how Bamco classifies the games now puts it on more equal footing with the original, it was developed as more of a side sequel and not given the full resources of mainline game and it shows at various points. It does, however, have 2 different endings (and a "bad" game over end unique to one specific part of the endgame sequence) which are determined starting earlier in the game. So, if you want to go for both that's still more of a time sink than just one.

You could, though, if you opt to play one or both just do one playthrough on each or either and then look up alternate scenes via YouTube or something.

(Also, however, keep in mind when deciding if you want to play them or not that both games do have missable side quests that will flesh out characters and such so having a guide handy may help--or, again, you could probably find YT vids of them)

[whisperingwisterias]

Eden of the East and Fighting Oppressive Systems

There are many things about this anime that make it an interesting watch: the mystery surrounding Takizawa, his past, and the strange group he seems to be a part of; the technology of the phones and the endless possibilities they provide; the characters and their wildly different backgrounds and motives. However, despite the plot being mainly centered on trying to unveil the mysteries of all these things, the anime also provides a very clear commentary and criticism about how government involvement affects society and how that society in turn affects the upcoming generations.

To begin with, The Game itself and the person in charge of it, Mr. Outside, acts as an allegory for the government. Throughout the show we see many characters, mainly Takizawa, criticize this system. In the beginning of the show, Takizawa is told that if he wants to get what he wants, he needs to play by the rules of the game, even if he wants nothing to do with it. As he learns more about the game, he deems it unfair, preposterous, and idealistic. The Game interferes with their lives, expecting them to literally change the world with the opportunity it gives them, but when they mess up it is ruthless with its consequences. It claims to want to make things better, but it only becomes another oppressor.

There’s also a lot of criticism for the actual Japanese government in the show, which is a big aspect of neoliberalism. A comment was made in the first episode that no one can do anything by themselves anymore in Japan. When talking about her interview gone bad with Takizawa, Saki talks about another job she had looked into that was just trying to exploit the naivete of young adults trying to enter into the workforce, giving them long hour with little pay for it, and says that she doesn’t want to enter into a system like that. A Seleção exclaims that Japan preaches equality but continues to exploit its citizens, using his parents dying from overworking as an example, and refusing to let it put him into that same cycle.

However, the show also has its own criticisms for the neoliberalism mindset, and specifically the way society looks down on and blames those who avoid working in corporate jobs. When the Eden group first learns about Takizawa, their first instinct is to criticize how he doesn’t seem to have a job and just goes off doing his own thing, but one of their members points out how well-off he is despite that and how driven he seems to be, qualities that people only attribute to those that have jobs. People also criticize shut-ins like Yutaka for being leeches upon society who contribute nothing useful to it and simply waste their time on their own entertainment. However, Yutaka defies this stereotype; as despite being a shut-in and living a bit of an unhealthy lifestyle, he doesn’t laze around all day, and instead is an extremely intelligent researcher who spends his days immersed in his craft. In the end, he’s also the one that finds out about the missile attack in time to warn everybody, indirectly saving many areas of Japan despite being labeled by society as useless. Takiwaza also is a huge advocate and supporter of NEETs, saying that voluntarily becoming one is an act of resistance to their oppressors, and enlisting the help of the 20,000 NEETs that the other Seleção look down upon to stop the missile attacks from landing.

In the end, I think this show does a great job discussing the flaws both of the government system and of the neoliberalists who oppose it. Whether entirely rejecting the workforce and collectively becoming NEETs is the true answer to the problems these two sides cause is hard to say, but I think the discussion itself is a good first step into making a change to these systems.

[muthaz-rapapa]

Hirogaru Sky Impressions (1/5)

We're in for 48 episodes so I'll do these after every 10 episodes until the end.

And I'll try to keep it short since I'm sure most of the major topics have already been discussed in great length anyway so I don't want to add to the redundancy.

Simply put, this anniversary season has been a blast of heartwarming fun so far. Not to mention, quite innovative in regards to the franchise as a whole. The breaking of old trends is excitingly refreshing while the show is still keeping it very Precure in spirit.

If anything, SkyPre (HiroSky? HiroPre? which way are we calling it?) feels the most Precure to me since probably StarPre and I think that's due to how the writing is handled this year.

Story format changes

I'm very happy that they went for spreading out the introductions and pacing the debut schedules instead of bunching the first four episodes with one new transformation after another.

True, this technically started with DeliPaPre but last season was rather weak in the characterization and group chemistry departments that the effort seemed almost wasted.

Of course, I'm not saying the DeliPa girls were a poor team or anything. They were alright.

But when you watch SkyPre, the development just feels so much more satisfying, don't you think?

Starting the season off with paired Cures (as a tribute to FutariWa, kyaa! 😆) was a great idea because it gave a lot of time for Sora and Mashiro, the first members, to bond and find their groove as partners while establishing their characters through their individual personalities, goals and inner conflicts.

Then incorporating more Cures as we go along (Tsubasa/Wing and later, Ageha/Butterfly), we have something to look forward to every week instead of letting the hype die down right after everyone debuted already...until it rises up again with the reveal of the next stock footage only to go down again and repeat.

Precure's strongest trait as a magical girl series has always been its theme of friendship and teamwork. However, you can't achieve a solid execution of that theme well if you don't actually devote time and focus to the build up of genuine camaraderie.

And the basic foundations for that lies in everyone acknowledging each other's different strengths and demonstrating how vital and valuable those are to the group.

Ep 10 really reinforced those principles (even letting Sora and Mashiro dismiss the villain cuz their friendship moment with Tsubasa came FIRST 😤) which is great cuz with Ageha's debut coming up around the corner, we can rest assured that this aspect will remain steady for at least another 10 episodes.

2. Characterization

To have a good diversified team, naturally you would need distinctly carved out characters (in other words, more than just archetypes).

SkyPre does display some old patterns but that's not a bad thing since the show largely avoids over reliance on them by giving each Cure a significant amount of depth to work with and specific goal(s) to aim for.

For Sora, Tsubasa and Ageha, their personal character arcs are quite clear and they all fit into a type of hero to go along with the season's motif. Cure Sky being a traditional ally of justice, Cure Wing as the knight to Elle-chan's princess. And Ageha wishes to become a nursery teacher, which is a very admirable ambition as teachers can serve as role models to children.

That leaves Mashiro, who's been troubled on several occasions for not having a dream of her own.

But I don't believe this means an absence of a character arc for her. At the very least, there's certainly no lack of conflict since she realized the "problem" herself and has been given screentime to address it and overcome her own doubts.

Perhaps this is also indicating that "finding her dream" is her goal and learning to accept her own "light that illuminates others" is part of that discovery process.

Mashiro's personality and drive is very supportive in nature, after all. We saw that in how she was very welcoming and accommodating of Sora and Tsubasa, residents from another world. We saw that in how she was the one to comfort Ageha, who is older than her, in the past when they were both small children.

And that is a type of hero, too.

You don't have to be super confident or bold and forthright. You don't have to be a leader or force stereotypical notions of heroism onto yourself to be a hero.

You just need a good heart and to be able to act on it.

Chances are, if you were kind to someone in need or helped someone less fortunate because you knew it was the right thing to do, then you already qualify as a true hero.

I believe that is the message of Mashiro's story.

That said, we already got so much good content and we still have so much to look forward to. Yay! 😆

Ageha/Cure Butterfly joining the team foremost (sometime after ep 15 apparently since the next announced titles don't list her name yet)

More villain generals appearing soon and therefore, more insight into what they're really after (though it's probably gonna be generic evil as always but eh, whatever cuz everything else is awesome).

More on the person who saved Sora and inspired her to become a hero, Tsubasa accomplishing his dream of being able to fly w/o the assistance of magic.

Ellee-chan's mysterious powers, oooh~

First group attack, group power-up + power-up attack, ultimate power-up (??)

Midseason Cure already spoiled but we all know who it's going to be anyway and the question if her debut will fall around the early 20s or later with the shift in narrative arrangement (see above).

Hehe, yep it's gonna be great 😁

(on another note, they now have 38 more episodes to fix Prism's transformation sequence cuz god, did they do her dirty. Especially her going MIA on the "JUMP" platform did she jump so hard she went to Skyland?! and the static split screen. I can let go of everything else but PLEASE. FIX. THOSE. DAMMIT!! 🫵💢)

[sharonisthebettercarter]

So much suffering could've been easily avoided, had Billy's musty ass learn to calm the fuck down and instead of moping around, he should've took anger management classes before s3 ep 3. I understand it's very common for younger kids to look up to adults because Ryan probably admired Billy and now he let Ryan down.

If Ryan shuts Billy (and Shitlander) down next season, I'd say he deserved it. I know Billy's life have been hard too and I had compassion for him as well, but that's never an excuse to treat others like Billy did to Ryan in ep 3, s3. (I'd be) Glad Ryan (might be) mature enough to realize it was Billy's own fault that he decided to gaslight him.

Ryan has every right to cut billy off because at this point Billy is going to deflect and turn his back on everybody (like he did in the comics). Billy (like 🍇lander) will just brainwash Ryan with his own issues and turn him into a minion and i will never trust him around kids after using that infant and threatening to unalive children too. Yeah he didn’t kill a child (yet) but Ryan (nor any child) should get mixed up in his toxic bullshit. I wouldn't be surprised if he successfully unalives Neuman's daughter, like the unsentimental douchebag he is.

holy fuck anon! putting all your asks together in this but i'll try to respond as best i can between them (gonna put your shizz in italics), lmao there is a shit ton of ranting and i may do a little myself, don't mind me~<3

first off, that grapelander killed me because i have a sick sense of morbid humor but also wkuk the grapist

but i feel you, i get what you mean and for sure, billy is an enraging character that somehow manages to be less well adjusted and more fucking damaged than homie while having genuinely less garbage to show for on his 'shit has happened to me' roster. not even saying that as a dig at the guy but it becomes very very clear (and infuriating) when you actually read the comic or even just watch back the show. specifically, he doesn't have a single soft moment where he's being genuine with someone that isn't becca and it dives hard into that disturbing element.

the difference being that homelander has the power to do far far worse with much greater ease, but the craziest thing about that is that he generally doesn't and even in some cases (obviously not always, but james stillwell even mentions this in the comics, that homelander has incredible control over his temper) shows a remarkable sense of self control. and i think it shows for more that there's so much homelander chooses not to do at any given moment while billy is spending 1000% of his time and effort working towards these things, including chipping away at homelander's control (which as everyone keeps warning him is gonna fuck EVERYONE over!)

but billy is pretty much the next stage of what would happen to homelander if he actually did earn someone's love/learned to actually love them back. he latches on hard and it's borderline parasitic with how bad he can be and how he makes them his lifeline without actually addressing or working on any of his issues. his whole damn schtick is to drag homelander down to his level so they can duke it out. losing becca was a catalyst, but the reality is that it stopped being about her a long time ago. the real issue is his pride

that should be clear enough in his willingness to alienate ryan AND potentially and actually destroy whole buildings full of thousands of innocent bystanders just to get to ONE guy.

and the thing is, alienating ryan was completely unnecessary. it was billy being a preemptive cunt of 'i'm eventually going to hurt/disappoint this kid, so let me just make it easier on myself by doing it on purpose now instead of actually trying because trying is too hard.'

WELP. y'know billy, maybe if you hadn't done that, the kid would have kicked his grape daddy in the balls and left with you at the end of the season instead~!

but it should say enough that he actually said the words (more/less) "nah, it'll be years before ryan can take him(homelander) on" in regards to using him like a weapon against said grape daddy...

I hope fans turn against trashlander when seasons 4-5 rolls, after its revealed homelander is a shitty, unsupportive parent who's ruining his kid. I also hope they realize Creeplander was given a choice to go to the light side, leave vought, and call them out on their shit, numerous times, yet he refused and then killed or tried to kill the people who offered him such. This man has made his choice MANY TIMES, AFTER choosing to fall to the dark side in the first place. Why should he be offered yet another chance? And why would he expected to make a different choice? And even if he did, why should he be considered eligible for redemption? He can’t un-murder all those innocent people, he can’t un-torture his victims. He does not want to be redeemed.

But if they wanna keep having the flying creep in a wholesome light, then go do that, mother teresa. Imma see this dude get folded by kryptonian dogs

listen... i gotta level with ya...

as much as trashlander is accurate, and as much as i look forward to the coming chaos and destruction and blood and death~<3<3<3 excuse me~

that is an unlikely hope when we got fucking rape apologists in fandom. just. i gotta be real.

and homie's not gonna be the shitty unsupportive type parent. don't get me wrong, he will absolutely be shitty. but less 'you're a fucking disgrace and i'm going to abuse the shit out of you' so much as... 'my kid is perfect and can do no wrong ever' entitled parent nightmare. he's going to be supportive... in all the worst and most horrible ways, enabling the shit out of ryan to be terrible (you remember that little smirk ryan got at the very end of s3? think more of that type of shit, tho i do think it may become too much for ryan to handle, right now, homie is the only person telling him what he would want to hear and providing him with **dangerously unconditional 'love' while he's in a very vulnerable place)

that being said, there haven't been instances where homelander's been presented with any real chances to leave vought. and i'm going to say this because it comes from a place of first hand experience with abuse.

homelander is trauma bonded to vought. yes, they abused and did so much terrible shit to him, but they were still his 'parent', his 'mother' or 'creator'. and when someone is trauma bonded to family? especially in a place where *family* and love is the ONLY thing you long for and the ONLY thing that you have? it is NOT that simple to be presented with an 'out' and just take it.

especially when you have nowhere to go.

abused is a precarious place to be put in (never say that people choose this, they don't). because it is not always obvious, it is not always painful, but it is unbearably blinding. it is a vicious cycle that continually hurts you. but it also offers you comfort, and love, and everything you could possibly want... without ever actually following through or instead giving you the bare minimum to keep you addicted. and most people don't realize they are STUCK in the cycle until it's dug its claws in and won't let go, or until it's gone too far.

but it is NEVER a choice. it is a specific psychological response and preconditioning that is extremely difficult or even impossible to break through and break free from.

abuse victims never want the abuse. what they do want is to *fix* the situation and not abandon the people they love, even if they shouldn't love them. but it is not an easy place to be in, and it is not a choice either.

homelander doesn't want to abandon vought because they are all he's ever known, he doesn't want to be abused either. he wants to fix it, and even if that's a lost cause, he doesn't see that because vought robbed him of the ability to see that. by making him BELIEVE in them and having control of his life since before he was even born.

he never had a choice and he still doesn't have one because no one has shown him that he does.

sorry for the lecture, but for me that subject hits way too close to home and any time i can correct misinformation or prevent victim blaming, i am who i am.

anywho. agreed that 'redemption' may still not be the best choice for homelander's situation. not to say it's impossible, but he also DID become an abuser and has hurt countless people. and you're right, none of those people will get a second or their lives back. but i think there is also something to be said about what homie could do to make up for it/how many more he could save if he did make different choices (even if unlikely, lmao)

comics homie is actually a different (even more fucked up and tragic story) who honestly might have chosen to go back to being 'good' post epiphany/reveal if he'd had the choice, but i digress.

i am looking forward to him flying off the deep end tho~<3

Ryan needs to ditch Homelander (and Billy) to secure his future and live his own life because at the end of the day, it's all about control (especially when it comes to the flying cunt). Ryan will not only lose his childhood, but lose his adulthood as well, the past and future being stolen from him, unless he manages to escape the flying cunt (and Billy too because fuck him and Ryan has every right to not forgive a poor excuse of a human being too) to make his future secured and his life not ruined any further than it is. Also, tell vought to fuck off too.

I also hope he find some strangers who will genuinely help him and treat him right than those scumbags (and Mallory too because she sus).

Get orchiectomy when he's of age because if I came from a fucked up bloodline and surrounded by fucked up people on a daily basis, I'd do the same too (I mean I wouldn't blame him at all if he did that)

Change his identity legally and move to a different ass Country because start anew.

agreed that ryan is pretty much better off without any of those mofos lmao. like honestly, he's too good for half of fandom advocating for his fucking death as they dick ride soldier boi. i don't care how handsome any of them are, ryan is a fucking child, becca's child, not a goddamn hot potato to be tossed around or cooked.

castration is a little extreme even with his powers i'm gonna say. i mean i kinda get what you mean but at the end of the day, we are not our bloodlines. ryan isn't his father and you def recognize that so i think he could move on with his life without necessarily going that far.

mallory is def sus but i still love her and i actually think the likeliest option is that ryan ends up saved after the whole scorched earf debacle (for real this time) and then adopted by annie and hughie in the end.

Despite the fact that Ryan really has been given the shit end of the stick in the reality he calls life. I wouldn't be surprised if he eventually becomes something without forgiveness, and he certainly becomes a part of some unforgivable acts, but really haven't been given the chance to thrive and succeed. It's gonna be sad, because I think Ryan would have been entirely different had he been given a chance. But chances can possibly be too late for him, or something will happen that emphasizes that.

However, depending on how seasons 4-5 goes, he should grow a backbone ditch both homelander and Billy because he can do better w/o them because all that poor boy wanted is to find a place where he is loved, safe, and appreciated. Yet, every time he finds that, it gets ripped away from him. I can't imagine what outcome he will have to suffer next. I fear what comes.

...

i almost don't want to do this to you but the irony is just too fucking poetically palpable.

LIKE FATHER. LIKE SON. and so the cycle fucking continues... jesus fucking christ fuck me.

'growing a backbone' is easier said than done. one of the pain points of the general hero genre is to teach us to protect those who cannot protect themselves. and what the boys does is take that ideal and put it through the meatgrinder of reality. we often don't do this in real life.

that's supposed to sorta be the lesson taught with lenny. he didn't 'choose' to 'sink', no one does. you could argue that the world is tough and people need to be stronger (like billy's toxic piece of shit sperm donor), but i would argue the world needs to be softer for those that won't be able to keep up or who are vulnerable.

one suicide is too many. what are we really doing if we let so many people fall that far?

EVERYONE deserves to feel loved, safe, and appreciated... and it's the lack of those things that CREATES monsters of men.

I've seen kids manage to leave their fucked up situations, despite difficulty. It's going to be simple though. Besides, not all strangers are bad, right? In fact Ryan had better luck with those he doesn't know very well- like kimiko- than he has with his own family. Buuuut, who knows how long can that 'luck' last.

Sure he has his maternal aunt and grandmother, but welcome him w/ open arms?? If a child comes to your doorstep, saying they're you're nibling (the child of your sibling) and grandchild, along w/ your sister and daughter dead because they accidentally killed her?

Because his entire life has been out of his control from being raised in a hermit place because of satan dad and vought, to the death of his mother, to his mom's so called 'husband' gaslighting him, and now satan dad most likely forcing Ryan to distance himself from others, and then said father involving Ryan in murderous plots and promising him family in return which he will never provide. Yeah, Ryan had zero control.

If it ever happens, a group of people (or supes such as super-duper), could be the point where he actually has a say, his freedom, and a support network and hopefully he embraces it but... It might not be a happy ending, depending on how things go in his future. And that is depressing.

Better to leave the hell he's in now than staying. Also, he can defend himself (for obvious reasons), until he finds some strangers who genuinely want to help him, rather than hinder him and the best way to survive in a new environment is to learn from the locals. He should fight tooth and nail to cut ties w/ shit from his past and no longer associate with it as he starts to get better because if I was him, I wouldn't even go back.

Unless something in him clicks in, which he feels he has to go back, as if there's (a) haunting shadow(s) constantly following him. People underestimate the power abuse can have over a victim. You even got oppressed nations or people glorifying their own oppressors/abusers in the real world. he might not be raging and trying to kill anyone right now, but he might clearly mistrustful.

i'm gonna take a moment to get a bit more serious and mention survivor's bias. (i'm also assuming you mean '*not* that simple' hopefully??)

but keep in mind and this more a guesstimate outta my ass so don't quote me on it. but while it's great that those kids get out of those shitty situations, keep in mind that for every 10 kids that do, you might have a 100 more that don't. (just look at the foster system or pedo church rings, sorry, yuck, i know... but there are a lot more child victims that suffer in silence than we could ever know)

and for ryan, yeah, i for sure hope that he is able to get out of it all and get into a better situation, at the same time you have to remember that he is a just a child. he is not going to manage that on his own and things are likely to get worse before they get better.

i don't think becca's family would reject him tho because shocker, i REALLY don't think they'd be like BILLY~! especially with ryan being the last piece of becca left. i do think they might have some fears or be wary, but i do think grams and sister would just be happy to have him and the closure

LMAO AT 'SATAN DAD', can vouch for that. tho to be fair... satan is a GREAT daddy~ but an AWFUL dad... ;)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) (i cannot resist and i am not sorry.)

but yeah, i think the ideal here would be for ryan to NOT become either of his 'father' figures

and what is all this shit at the last part??? see you DO get it! just try not to forget that billy and homie are also products of their upbringing. but they WERE ryan at one point too. innocent kids that didn't deserve what the world gave and *didn't* give to them...

billy got out of it but carries every fucking scar with him and it still has an ironclad hold on him. homelander still hasn't gotten out. ryan is a snowball waiting to happen.

ugh, this shit gets depressing but you ranted, i ranted, we all had good fun and great discussion of these shitheads and i am looking forward to the new season~!

fuck me this is long, and thanks for comin' to my ted talk.

[lazinesswrites]

Writing Patterns

Rules: list the first line of your last 10 (posted) fics and see if there's a pattern!

I was tagged by @auburnlaughter a little while ago; thank you! ❤

I'm doing the latest 10 fics I've posted to Ao3, oldest first, and I'll include links because... every excuse to self-promote? Everything here is Star Wars, most of it Bad Batch (from before s3, save the last two), and most of that is more or less Crosshair-centric.

Sunrise Caf (TCW post-war AU, pre-CodyWan, 1k, G)

“Do you still prefer your caf black, now that you have access to more options?” Obi-Wan asks as Cody sits down at the small kitchen table in Obi-Wan’s new apartment.

Labor of love is ours to endure (TBB s1 finale AU-CD, 4.6k, T)

Wrecker watches as Hunter talks to Crosshair about chances; watches as Omega says her piece too.

To feel your heart as it's keeping time (TBB, Batch twins, 3.3k, G)

Since Crosshair’s recent and long-awaited return to their squad, Tech has found that treating him like one would a feral tooka has been relatively successful in getting the sniper to relax around him.

Don't You Doubt (TBB, Cross & Hunter, 2.5k, T, part of a series)

Pabu is very quiet at night.

And please be there; I can barely hang on (But oh I wait 'til I break) (TBB, h/c, 3.8k, T) (this one's in Russian too!)

Crosshair didn't know they'd be here.

Mirjahaal (TBB, pre-show, 2.1k, G)

Echo doesn’t know what Crosshair’s problem is.

Breakthrough on Bracca (TBB, AU-CD, 4.6k, T)

Crosshair wakes to a face on fire and a clear mind.

Change of Heart, Change of Plans (TBB, AU-CD, 5.6k, G)

A flash of white armor in his periphery, accompanied by the sound of familiar voices – or rather, one familiar voice from multiple people – has Hunter diverting from their route, leading his siblings into a dark and dank alley, waiting for the troopers to pass.

We're Still What's Left (TBB s3e4 cont., grief, 1.7k, T)

“But… how did you escape?” Hunter asks the kid, and Crosshair figures that’s his cue, even if he’s not sure he’s quite ready for whatever awaits him out there.

Homecoming Heroes (TBB, sequel to above, 2.8k, T)

Pabu is… nice.

Thoughts and tags below the cut:

So... Patterns? I was gonna say something about fairly long sentences, but then half of them turned out to be pretty short, actually 😅

I guess I try to set the scene: Who's there, what are they doing, what's the Problem (if the characters know, yet) etc. Try to make clear what canon scene we've jumped into, when relevant (I.e. in Labor of love, which picks up towards the end of Kamino Lost, when Hunter has just said something like 'you gave us a chance Crosshair; this is yours' and Omega has said 'they're still your brothers, Crosshair. You're my brother too.', which is what Wrecker's thoughts are referring to.)

I also tend to start right in the middle of Something, especially in the more action-filled ones. This is both because I then avoid losing people to "boring" exposition or world-building or descriptions right out of the gate, and also because beginnings are Hard, so the way I typically start writing a fic (or anything, really) is to start with whatever scene I've got in mind that sparked the idea for the rest of the fic, regardless of when it actually takes place, and then build the rest around it. Or by writing notes/something like an outline if I don't have a specific scene in mind but more just a sort of general feeling or plot or theme or something I want to write about, and then expand those into text-text. This approach means I often end up explaining the things that need explaining throughout the fic, so there's no need to put it all at the beginning. And also - it's fanfic. By far most of my readers will already be familiar with the characters and general setting; I just need to make clear where and how we might deviate from that.

That's all, I think. But hey! if you got this far and you noticed something I didn't, why don't you tell me? (please be nice, though, I'm not looking for critique; just curious)

NPTs: @whimsicalmeerkat @hxad-ovxr-hxart @spacemagicandlaserswords @battlekilt

[spookfished]

nov 2023 media roundup

hello again :3 welcome to the world from 2024!! im doing backlogs of media reviews lol. well i was really busy. and then i was super busy playing umineko!! looking back at this month, it seems like i didnt read a whole lot this month, but then i forgot that ruzhui is literally 300 chapters long. so.. a couple of these i read uh quite a few months ago by now so the review might be a bit stale. however i had like 80% of this written for several weeks so theres only a couple! this will be posted on my neocities at some point

books:

ruzhui by please dont laugh: f/f. after a terrible breakup, college yun an is happy to leave her life behind for some TIME TRAVEL! but while disguising herself as a man to avoid discrimination, she gets looped into a matrilocal marriage with businesswoman lin buxian?! intended as a fluffy palate cleanser after pdl's previous work a clear and muddy loss of love, i think it still kinda ended up getting mired in politics two thirds of the way in, when a lot of us were here for the moments with miss malewife yun an and her powerhouse wife? on the other hand, its hard to stretch out fluff for an entire 300 chapters without contriviances. i also really enjoyed how it managed to balance like. idk. 'returning to the simple emotions of the past' with 'holy shit guys the past actually sucked ass lmfao'. its a pretty relaxing read, so id recommend checking it out if youre into f/f!

the devil comes courting by courtney milan: f/m romance. can romance bloom while trying to create the first telegraphic encoding for chinese...? sooo cute im a huge fan of courtney milan as always. surprisingly goes into some pretty heavy topics including like. forced assimilation via child stealing?????? i thought it was well handled though the ldr stuff and the way amelia grows as a person was soo nice

the marquis who mustnt by courtney milan: f/m romance. the son of a conman returns home for one final trick. meanwhile, naomi just wants to take her medic class. the two become engaged on false premises and of course, catch feelings. once again extremely cute im very charmed. also liked the pottery details :3 i think in every fake engagement the whole 'pretending to themselves they dont have feelings' is a little ridiculous so i liked that they just like. acknowledged it at the outset. i think its honestly more compelling to be like 'yes my feelings are sincere and true however X still outweighs '. loove a guy shackled by duty

wandering souls by cecile pin: follows anh and her two siblings, refugees of the vietnam war. ok honestly i dont remember a lot about this book :( sorry but i did like it! its a really fast read and made me really sad so id recommend. (DISCLAIMER: AMERICAN) i also feel like i dont read a lot of non-american diaspora books so thats pretty interesting as well. nice prose also :]

detransition baby by torrey peters: a trans woman who yearns for motherhood, her detransitioned ex-boyfriend, and his pregnant partner struggle to find a way to live--together, or apart? ok sorry this is another review written in january so its kinda weighted more negatively. i had a LOT of thoughts about this in november but i forgot most of them. this novel is a deep look into a very specific kind of queer subculture--a subculture which is both very white and very annoying. sorry. the characters feel like a vivid, true-to-life depiction of the poeple i try to avoid at my little liberal arts college. however, it ALSO feels like the kind of really good gossip that you love to hear secondhand. also, the author shoehorns in discussions of race in ways that are really jarring and also, kinda bad? i honestly really loved the inner voices of all the characters which is why it sucked when i got to suddenly read a copy-pasted twitter thread about intersectional oppression instead. (especially coming from the mouth of a cis wasian woman..?) it feels all the more tokenistic since we immediately go back to the inner struggles of ames and reese instead. ugh. however, it sparked some really interesting conversations with me and my friends. i also got to learn more about ah i guess transfem detransition? as opposed to transmasc detransition. they are very different! um but i guess id recommend?

comics/manga:

surviving romance: action/horror webtoon?? the woman living in the body of a romance novel character is determined to get her picture-perfect happy ever after-- at all costs. everything goes according to plan until the day zombies attack the school. chaerin is forced to bond with the faceless extras of her story, and find out what is rotting at the core of *love every day*. very solid writing!! i like how the author gradually introduces characters, and how the tension ratchets up as more people to care for becomes more people that can be lost. definitely goes into some orv-lite type themes, which i appreciated. i guess my only complaint is that despite the solid execution it didnt really ~wow~ me in any way... still worth checking out though :3

run away with me girl by battan: f/f romanceish? two high school lovers meet again after midori decided that their relationship was just a childish whim. but even though midori has decided shes straight (and is married with a kid on the way!), maki still has feelings for her. dude soooo cute the art style is not personally my thing but i felt like all of the characters were really grounded and the introspective parts were really interesting. some beautifully atmospheric parts! would recommend :3 witch hat atelier kitchen (reread) by shirahama kamome: a spinoff of witch hat atelier, where the two teachers qifrey and olrugio make food together after hours! gorgeous art as always, and some cute recipes too! i reread this since an official english translation came out lol. monotone blue: short furry m/m about apathetic, aloof cat hachi, who meets aoi--a shy transfer student who happens to be the only lizard in the whole school. pretty lighthearted for the most part, but also heavily implied a sexual assault scene?? or at least the vibes?? in a way that treated it far too lightly and left a bad taste in my mouth. possibly worth reading for the art, but idk :/ definitely falls into the romance trap of having a love interest go "ill save you from these bad guys!" for like a cheap plot device and then not really going into it

movies/tv:

parasite: class-focused comedic thriller? the kim family finds a way out of choking poverty by working for the extremely affluent park family. its almost too easy--until it isnt. man everyone says parasite is so good. AND IT IS!!! i cant believe i took so long to see this movie i got to see it with some friends over thanksgiving break and it was so good :] had me stressed for my fucking life sitting at the edge of my seat. has a lot of meat to bite into analysis-wise but is also just so crushing in many ways.. the ending stuck in my head for a long time. rewatching it this january was honestly more stressful in some ways haha

revolutionary girl utena: allegory-heavy commentary on shoujo and princess narratives and the nature of heroism and-- f/f. utena is a girl who aspires to be just like the prince of her dreams. she is somehow wrapped up into an engagement with anthy himemiya, who calls herself "the rose bride." ahhhh i still havent watched the last two episodes actually. people always say "utena is a fantastic show but PLEASE mind every single trigger warning" and its true! utena tackles some really heavy subjects in a way that is delicate, understated, and vicious. i watched a bunch of these episodes late at night in the computer lab and they honestly left me breathless. has so many layers of symbolism to dig through that it can honestly be overwhelming, but also very compelling just on the surface! watch utena. also watch this amv https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=THN3gYKYojs

the wonderful story of henry sugar: a netflix adaptation of one of roald dahls stories (within a story). it was cute :3 not a lot of sticking power lol but i think this is the first wes anderson production ive ever watched. very visually distinctive!

video games:

lethal company: cooperative horror game about trying to collect garbage in a dystopically capitalist world ft. proximity chat! dude this game is blowing tf up i tried playing it with neil but 1. we are huge pussies 2. its really only feasible with 3+ people

music:

TILT by nanoray: anime breakcore is one of my truly guilty pleasures. i see the anime girl on the cover and cringe a little bit HOWEVER nanoray is a really good artist. the intro is so liquid... i think the album as a whole really just sweeps you up into a groove. some of my favorite tracks are into and DOGWALK2000 THE LONELIEST TIME by carly rae jepsen: i was so mean to carly rae jepsen in middle school. im so sorry miss jepsen i was just so tired of hearing call me maybe everywhere. im now a changed man. just a really well constructed pop album 👍admittedly not as iconic to me as emotion, but joshua tree and talking to yourself are my favorites atm SAYONARA WILD HEARTS OST: ive never played sayonara wildheart, but i think its a rhythm game about girls fighting each other on motorcycles? with bisexual lighting and tarot cards? but anyways this is a synth-y lush pop album thats super fun! it feels like it tells a story (probably bc it does) and it always makes me want to listen all the way through :3 my favorites are sayonara wild heart and their clair de lune remix

anyways if you read to the end, thanks as always! its really interesting to try and condense my thoughts about something into one paragraph.. sometimes its easier than others huh! im almost done with the december one so please look forward to that 👍