#alfie comic

[burntpink]

[genericpuff]

living for these kinds of scenes lmaoo

me 99% of the time ^^^

[sifefoinun]

I feel like her so much right now.

[acrobaticpirouettes]

Alfie (2010) if it was also an isekai

Stop me if you hate the concept: short, fat, hairy lady gets isakai'd into a high fantasy, and instead of "oh look at all these ethereal elves woe for I am but a flawed mortal" routine she lands in Dwarf territory and is immediately revered as the most enchanting and desirable maid in all the land. This immediately becomes a zesty romantic drama. Thoughts

[prlssprfctn]

Alfred, who tries to punish little Jason for something he messed up with by using the same methods he used on Dick — aka. ground him, make him wash dishes and clean the house, or just watching some old reality shows with him — expect... it never works. Jason is actually fucking excited about all of these things.

Alfred: To my attention was brought a fact that you smoked with Commissioner Gordon again. Jason, stuttering: I mean- I- Alfred: Thus, you are punished. I expect all dishes to be cleaned by the time I return home. Jason, confused: Really? Alfred: Yes. Jason, beaming, because cleaning makes him feel better and helps to distract himself: Cool! Thanks, Alfie. Alfred: Excuse me?

Cut to Alfred, who stares in shock as he finds Jason actually enthusiastically washing dishes, while singing along with Whitney Houston.

Alfred: For this punishment, you will... be grounded. Jason: Oh, thank god, guys from school invited me to the cinema, but I didn't want to go, anyway. Alfred: ...And clean up the whole cave. Jason: I actually did this morning! But I can do another round of quick cleaning session if you want, Alfie. Alfred: ...And then you will watch another soap opera with me, lad. Jason, squealing: Cool!

Bruce, staring amusedly on Alfred and Jason, who sew Batman's and Robin's suits, while discussing the new episode of their favourite show: Al, I don't think that's a punishment for a kid... Alfred, frowning: Of course not. I am just spending time with my grandson. Bruce: Mhm-m. What about the punishment for your favourite broken vase? Alfred, who promised to punish anyone who did it this morning, because he thought it was Bruce, and not Jason, who accidentally knocked it off with the tip of his cape: ... Alfred: What vase? Jason: *beaming*

Alfred, solemnly: My boy. I am afraid, this time you truly need to serve your punishment in the order to understand your mistake. Alfred: No Jane Austen adaptations marathon for this Sunday. Jason, in horror: Alfred, no. Please. Alfred: Even more, you are obligated to go out on Sunday, and stay away from doing any additional homework. Jason: NO-O. Dick, who came for holidays, witnessing this for the first time: ... Dick: I think this kid is broken or something.

[mylifeingotham]

[violent138]

Dick, eye twitching a little: "So kids are a little..." *hand gesture* "How the hell did you put up with me?"

Bruce, keeping his voice low, surveying the inhabitants of the Cave: "It wasn't easy, I thought of leaving you at a fire station once a week."

Dick: "Did you get that line from Alfred?"

Bruce:

Dick: "Nice try. Alfred told me I was a saint compared to you."

[not-another-robin]

Today on comics that only make sense in my beautiful mind

[oat-pup]

what the fuck

[chemicalcindercat]

Ethereal/Deity Batfam AU I'm playing around with:

-Bruce is a karma deity, meaning he can sense how good or bad a person is. It's way more complicated than that, because humans are complicated, so most of the time he ignores peoples' auras. However if someone is particularly good or evil, Bruce can pull some strings in the universe so that they will be rewarded or punished appropriately.

-This comes in handy during his work as Batman because he can sense which of the criminals are decent people acting out of desperation (and send some good vibes their way so hopefully they can make a better choice) and which ones enjoy hurting people (to which he will send the bad vibes towards). He doesn't kill, but on the rare instance he feels someone really deserves it, he can pull some strings to make their life fall completely apart.

-Dick is a sleep demon. He can make people fall asleep or wake up, can influence their dreams (sometimes even weave them from scratch), and on occasion he can view or enter someone's dream (he could theoretically also use this to communicate with someone in a coma). When Bruce approached him that fateful night at the circus, Dick was crying because he thought his parents were dreaming but he couldnt see their dreams or wake them up.

-As Robin, he can easily put a group of people into a deep sleep and give them good dreams while he's at it (or terrible nightmares if he's pissed off). He also uses this ability on Bruce (and his future siblings) a few different times when the man is denying himself sleep.

-When Bruce finds and adopts Jason, he's a normal human kid up until his death. He is resurrected and given a job as a reaper. His task is to collect people's souls as they die and take them to the afterlife to be with their loved ones. He looses his physical form after he dies and becomes formed from literal shadows; however most people can't see his true form, so when he collects souls he takes on the appearance of either the person's closest loved one, or whatever idea of the grim reaper/death they believe in. (Dick, Bruce, and Alfred still see him as the Jason they knew before he died, because of how much they loved him.)

-When he collects the souls of criminals or other people he feels don't deserve eternal peace, he simply decides to keep their souls for himself. (Perhaps he keeps them locked up, or devours them, idk how dark I want to be with this yet.) Sometimes he has to collect the souls of children too, and it's his least favorite thing in the entire world, but he does his best to make them feel safe and comfortable as he carries them to the afterlife. (He always takes kids to the afterlife.)

I'm not sure about the rest of the bats yet, so if anyone wants to share their thoughts or ideas please feel free! I'd love to make this into a series once the rest of the ideas form, but for now I have a different Batfam WIP to focus on.

[alfiethaddeuscranepennyworth]

I just learned that the joker is insane now... This is bullshit.

[burntpink]

Alfie herself and the comic as well. I'm addicted!

you're welcome for that 😌

and noo, i can't accept that comparison, Alfie has huge boobs!!

[genericpuff]

i need alfie to come back already goddamn-

the wait is fr killing me （；´д｀）ゞ

[draconifay]

How did Hal's current form come about? 💫

[gothamsmom]

Alfred

He looks like an evil edgelord, Goddamnit Alfie

[renegade-hierophant]

I'd die for Alfie!