#adhd meltdown

[welcome-to-the-agender-agenda]

I don't think anyone talks about ADHD meltdowns enough.

I get them 9/10 times when I try to do homework.

It's not just crying because I do that every time I get frustrated with work and that's quite often.

It's not just accepting defeat and being angry with yourself because I do that a lot too.

It's breaking down sobbing, bending over and hugging yourself as snapping at anybody who tries to get you to continue working.

It's repeating I can't I can't over and over and feeling so ashamed whilst you're doing it.

It's feeling so angry with yourself because you know you can do the work you just can't do it like this and you're taking out your anger on other people.

It's other people trying to be helpful by saying that you can do it and there isn't much left so we have to crack on but that only makes you more frustrated.

Because they don't understand.

You want to.

But you just can't.

[autismdoll]

a person speaking about their experiences having and distinguishing ADHD based meltdowns and ASD based meltdown

i relate

[brain-drippings]

Meltdown

I had a meltdown tonight while playing D&D.

Today was a really long day. I got up at 9am so I could be out the door less than an hour later so I could stop by Starbucks to grab breakfast and drive 40 minutes to teach a class at 11 am.

On the way home from teaching, two gas stations of the same company did not want to take my PayPal debit card, which was extremely frustrating.

Once I got home, after picking up some amazing lunch, I ate and got ready so we could go grocery shopping. Somehow I was more anxious about time than my hubby. He's been looking forward to finally being able to hand out candy for trick-or-treat, but I seemed to care more about the time.

Once we got home, we had around an hour to finish getting ready for trick-or-treat. Again, I seemed to be more concerned about time. I saw kids a few places down and quickly got the candy ready and outside for them. He completely missed them.

Once trick-or-treating was done, we had a little time to relax and eat dinner. Soon after that was D&D. We are now at 9:30p. Notice the lack of a nap for me at this point. The DM isn't ready yet, which is getting really frustrating. So I decide to go "Let me know when we're ready to play" and leave the voice chat. My hubby's also in the game, so he let me know when we were ready. Except we didn't start yet.

By around 11:30, we were rounds deep into an annoying battle. Things were taking forever. Side discussions were happening. I was getting really tired. And my Stimagz were in the car because they fell out of my bag on the way home. I cast a spell. Everyone goes "Are you sure?" so I go, "Fine! Different spell!" It gets countered.

It wasn't that it got countered that set me off. It was that the way the DM worded it, I wasn't sure if there was backlash on me or what. Once he explained, I muted myself again (partially because the mic was also being weird all night) and sent my hubby a chat saying that I'd be right back, I wanted to get my Stimagz from the car and I'd let them know.

I was so overwhelmed at this point that I was crying. I know part of it was how much happened today. Part of it was that I was running on less sleep than I really should have. Part of it was I know the meds had worn off. But I knew the Stimagz would help.

They did. Just finding them helped. I sat back down, got out the Stimagz, put on High Drama, and breathed. I felt so much better. Thankfully soon after the game was done for the night.

Today has not been a good day. I'm going to try to go get some rest now.

Oh, and here's the link for the Stimagz in case anyone is interested. I'm really loving them: Stimara | Magnetic Fidget Toys for Better Focus & Stress Relief

[gryphonlover]

Whumptober 2023 Day 9

Prompt: polaroid

Victim: Wind

Words: 623

Notes: We're pretending that polaroids and pictoboxes are the same thing. Also, ADHD!Wind is something you can pry out of my cold, dead hands.

Wind loved his pictobox. He didn't have the greatest memory for details, so if he wanted to really remember something and make it impossible to forget, then he took a picture of it. Problem solved.

Growing up with an abundance of extra energy and a lack of memory required some work-arounds. He figured that the memory he didn't have had somehow turned into that extra energy somewhere along the way as a baby. 

Grandma said that wasn't how kids developed, but it was a good enough explanation for him. 

So the pictobox was, understandably, very important to him. It wasn't as important as his sentimental items, like the telescope, or his shield, but it definitely made his life better. He had a system that his Grandma had helped him out with, using a journal and the pictobox and colored pencils to keep his life organized. It didn't work as well traveling around, because it was so much easier to lose his stuff, but everyone knew that the journal, pictobox, and pencils were off-limits.

I had only taken one incident to firmly cement respect for his boundaries, and he was pretty sure that Legend still had a scar from getting bitten after the game of keep-away had gotten out of control.

So he was <i>pretty sure</i> that none of his brothers could possibly be dumb enough to touch any of his things on purpose. Which led to the question of how had his things gone missing? 

Well, the how wasn't currently as pressing as the where. He needed to get his things back and then he could figure out who took his stuff and pound some sense into them, provided that he hadn't just lost them from sheer stupidity and absent-mindedness. 

This resulted in the messy process he was now completely engrossed in. Searching through the entire camp and trying to go about it methodically. 

Everyone else was out and about, leaving him free to lose his mind.

He dug through the laundry pile again, sticking his hands frantically into every pocket and hoping that maybe the pictobox or the pencils had ended up in his pants or something. As he pulled another tunic out of the heap, he could feel his eyes prickling with tears. 

He just wanted his things back so he didn't screw things up by forgetting stuff again, but he couldn't remember where he'd put them in the first place!

"Wind?" Hyrule's voice floated through the air uncertainly. "Is something wrong?" 

Wind sniffed and swiped the tears away before standing up and turning to face Hyrule. "I… I just lost something." 

Hyrule's brows furrowed in concern. "What thing? Your sword, or your telescope?" 

Wind shook his head. "No, I– my things, the journal and pictobox and pencils. I can't find them!" His voice got louder and more distressed against his will, the roiling emotions taking over. He buried his face in hands, embarrassed that he was having a meltdown over losing something so <i>inconsequential</i>.

There was a soft crunch of grass, and the calm aura that Hyrule always put off settled next to him. Wind leaned to the side, just letting himself completely flop onto his brother once he made physical contact.

Thin, warm arms wrapped around him, gently rubbing at his shoulders in an attempt to soothe him. 

When he finally cried it all out, Hyrule helped him up to wash the tear-stains off his face and resume looking for his things. It still sucked, it still sucked <i>a lot,</i> but at least now he had his brother as back up, and between the two of them he was pretty sure that they'd find his stuff. Even if it did take a while.

[thecanadianweeb]

Nearly died again today. Turns out my cherry allergy wasn’t just a rumour I made up.

Oh I also had a panic attack to the point of death. The whole campus had to be closed down for an hour.

I’m good though but I ended up getting expelled from psychology class.

[shortylikestea]

Today im posting 2 cuz yesterday I was really overstimulated and didnt post

4 oct: open fracture / head trauma / juggling

5 oct: stitches/shakey hands/halloween decorating

Im happy with day 5. It helped regain confidence. I do wish I'd made the eyes more distinct from eachother so its clear the parts come from different humans.

[realisationanddoubt]

The ADHD marathon

You live in a world where everybody runs

Running is a part of life

To succeed you need to run

To survive you need to run

Everybody can run

You can not run. Not like they can.

Your muscles are torn, you can not run

It is painful

When you do run your muscles tear

It takes weeks for you to recover

"Everyone can run" they'll say

People will sneer or roll their eyes

"I've seen you run."

"Just keep doing it"

"Nobody likes running but that's life"

You see the doctor

With a condescending grin he says

"It says here you've ran before.

We'll do a blood test just in case

But you can definitely run"

You just need to run to the test

But you can not run.

So the test is lost

There is no follow up

Everyone can run

After years you are sure

You can not run

You see a specialist

"Of course you can't run!

Just look at your muscles!"

Finally vindication

You tell everyone

See! I just couldn't run!

They smile "Always thought you ran weird!"

"This makes so much sense!"

Everyone knows you can't run

Finally it feels like freedom

The next day at work there's a foot race

"Don't worry" they'll say

"You just need to run"

[cherrybombfangirlwrites]

All Eyes on Me

School was an absolute bitch, So I went on another hiatus by accident but hey, at least we get a angsty snippet for Triveya out of it :D. And school won't be an issue for a while. No prompt for this one, just my little wizard Triveya having a mental breakdown and all that fun angsty shit.

Wordcount: 987

Warnings: autistic/adhd mental breakdown, self hate, rejection sensitive dysphoria, implied panic attack, and just mental health issues in general

FSF Taglist: @rose-bookblood @chalcid @evethenovicewriter @writing-is-a-martial-art @mjjune @fiercely-raging-writer @wildswrites @corishadowfang @surroundedbypearls @serenanymph (comment or send me a message to be +/- from the taglist <3)

General Taglist: @enchanted-lightning-aes @thatprolificauthor @wip-nook @writeblrsupport

Triveya sighed, slamming the book shut and throwing it onto her bed. She walked across the short length of her cabin, picking up a nearby mug filled with a relaxing tea. The ship swayed gently, waves lapping loudly and harshly against the hull. 

Two lanterns were lit, one next to the door and one above her bed. Her bed was a mess of books, blankets, quills and pots of ink, stray charms and potion bottles- all strewn about on the bed haphazardly. Torch was sleeping peacefully on the pillow, his small red scaly body curled up in a ball, blowing a small puff of smoke out his nostrils as he snored.

She folded her arms, glaring at the map of Eltya pinned to the wall. It was marked in blue ink- with possible locations where she and her friends had hidden the other two pieces of the amulet thousands of years ago. The original map had been done in brown and green colors, with black ink, all faded now.

Of course like an idiot she had forgotten where the other two pieces were hidden. Finding the first was easy because Cassandra and her crew had almost found it before. That piece now hung around her neck, sparkling bright blue against the other charms she had on her. Unfortunately the others would be expecting her to reveal the locations of the other two pieces any day now.

The pieces of the one thing they needed to take away the dark magic from The Witch Queen and imprison the magic. The spell was too long and complicated to make another. It had taken them a year to craft the amulet out of special metal and gemstone alone, and the spell had taken nearly all their energy from her and her friends who had cast it. The dark magic would have grown too powerful and have consumed all of Eltya by the time she’d be able to even find a suitable artifact for such an enchantment.

They needed to find those other two pieces, otherwise The Witch Queen was going to kill them all (and the dark magic would consume all of Eltya of course, but that was a secondary priority really). Triveya was the only one who knew where those pieces were.

And she had no clue what to tell them.

She rubbed the sleep from her eyes and ran a hand over her frizzy red curls, desperately trying to come up with an idea. 

She took a sip of her tea, kept warm with a little charm she’d put on the mug. It also had a small charm that made it impossible to spill the liquid in the mug, perfect for sailing on the sea, and another charm that made it indestructible. The drink did little to help her nerves and internal turmoil.

Triveya picked at her hands and nails and bit her lip until they were bleeding. It stung a little, but she’d stopped noticing a long time ago. She stared at the map intensely, willing something to jump out at her, willing herself to remember something- anything.

The map was marked in red, with places she remembered going to with her two friends during The First War. 

She’d managed to narrow it down to a few major locations that would make good hiding places for a powerful magic artifact: deep in one of the swamps of Greyvenhill, up in the Big Mountains that divided Goke and Dinvirty, Dryklan’s mines, deep in the forest that was once Farkle- perhaps even deep under the abandoned castle, and on the other side of the cliffs that surrounded the Sands of Doom.

It would take too long to go to each place and scour it, she knew that.

Why did she have to be so stupid?

She could do any spell out there, knew everything there was to know about magic and enchanted plants or animals- but she couldn’t remember two locations.

She’d always hated feeling stupid and forgetting the simplest things, but this time took the Witches Delight.

She took a shaky breath as something hot rolled down her cheek.

Mother Hallya, when had she started crying?

Triveya quickly wiped it away with her sleeve, trying to keep it together.

For some reason, the tears kept coming, faster than she could wipe them away. 

She pulled her sleeve up over her hand and used it to muffle the small sob that tried to escape. Triveya flapped her hand and the sleeve, trying to shake off the overwhelming feeling.

She was a forgetful idiot. 

She always had been.

Everyone was counting on her for the next step to stop the Witch Queen from killing them- and she had nothing.

She hated it.

She hated forgetting things.

She hated how stupid she was.

She hated that everyone needed her and she couldn’t meet their expectations.

She hated that this was the thing making her fall apart, after everything.

She hated that the one thing she was good at wasn’t enough.

She was useless and stupid.

Letting out a scream of frustration and rage, Triveya chucked her mug at the map as hard as she could.

Of course, thanks to the enchantments placed on it, the mug didn’t break, and not so much as a drop of tea spilled.

It fell to the trunk on the floor with a dull thunk.

She punched the door, wincing at how much it hurt to punch the solid wood but not really caring.

All the energy suddenly leaving her, Triveya sunk to the floor. A sob escaped her, and she pulled her sleeves over her hands and buried her face in them.

They couldn’t see her like this, falling apart on the floor and crying over something so stupidly easy and basic to remember- that for some Hallyasus reason, she couldn’t remember.

She couldn’t remember.

And the others were going to hate her for it.

[pigeon-cave]

Spectrum of overwhelm, now in triangle form due to popular demand

[Image description: A triangle chart titled, ‘Spectrum of Overwhelm.’ The three points are ‘404 Error,’ showing a person with an empty thought bubble; ‘wet beast,’ showing a person sweating and sobbing; and ‘rage beast’ showing a person clenching their fists in an outline of orange fire. The peak is the ‘404 error’ vertex, and the inside of the triangle here is coloured beige and labelled, ‘shutdown.’ The lower half is labelled ‘meltdown’ and is red on the rage beast side and blue on the wet beast side. \End description]

[brettbrainrot]

i was recently diagnosed with adhd, which pretty much explains everything about my personality, and people are exhausted to hear me rant about it (apart from my neurodivergent sister, who loves rambling about how life is difficult with me) so i’ll be talking about my daily life experiences on here.

for starters, i am at my first semester of college and i’m studying psychology. i love reading, i really like the career and it’s not a big deal for me to lock in with “big” readings for assignments i like, like this one called “history of psychology” (i am roughly translating it bc i am mexican and titles are in spanish here). what is hard is starting to do my assignments, so i usually procrastinate until it’s the day where it is due and i used to had time to finish them… until my teacher changed the delivery time from 12pm to 10pm. her reasoning? to make us to stop procrastinating till the very end, which obviously didn’t work for me and just made me turn in a bunch of unfinished assignments, hoping that at least she can see the effort made or smth.

i think this monday i had a meltdown too. i had to turn in a very big assignment that i procrastinated for three days, i usually don't push things this far but i had a problem with a friend that i was very focused on — and i obviously couldn't finish it on the spot bc it was very long and elaborated task, so i started crying and hyperventilating and it was horrible because that just slowed me more.

i know that i should try harder or something but i really feel like i’m overwhelmed all the time, sometimes i sit at my desk for hours hoping that inspiration will eventually come to me but the only thing that i find is frustration and with frustration comes more inability to just function. i feel like i am just lazy, sometimes i see other people with adhd that can manage themselves more and i feel like then it's just me? but i try to be gentle with myself, bc i know that a lot of adhders feel like this too and ik i'm not alone at very least.

i am on atomoxetine, but i am barely seeing results and for some reason i am very. very. sleepy. i fall so deep in sleep that sometimes i skip lunch bc even if i’m hungry, i’m way more sleepy. i just feel like i can force myself out of bed better, which is good bc i used to skip class for this problem, but yeah.

yeahyeahyeah wait they don’t love like i love u

[birdhism]

[therelatablestudent]

Thinking about how chaotic the 10th Doctor was toward the end where he just had a HUGE meltdown. He’s like “I am god I can bend time to my will” and suddenly hes chillin wearing a lei in the snow thinking the height of entertainment is locking the TARDIS like a car

[desultory-suggestions]

Pay attention to what makes you feel on edge. If you’re feeling angry try to stop and assess what is triggering that anger. It doesn’t have to make sense. Is the sound of shoes squeaking on the floor grating? Is the way someone is asking you for something upsetting even if the ask isn’t? Understanding what is bothering us is the first step to diffusing our anger.

[my-autism-adhd-blog]

Autism Meltdown Early Signs

Confusion & brain fog

Dissociation & memory issues

Mutism or speech delay

Paranoid & self-conscious

Higher sensory sensitivity

Increased stimming

Positively DBT - BPD, Autism, ADHD Peer Support

[surrah698]

[existennialmemes]

My Brain: [teetering on the edge of meltdown]

Me: What's wrong, we had a good day??

My Brain: Nothing!!! We just did A Lot of Things and now I would like to cry and scream about it!!