#abandonment wound

[unwelcome-ozian]

[fractal-unfoldment]

Unresolved abandonment is the root of self-sabotage.

Susan Anderson, The Journey From Abandonment to Healing

[the-healing-mindset]

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A post shared by Kasturi M ~ Indian Relationship Therapist & Coach (@heymisstherapist)

[seeyatellite]

I release myself from the burden of expectations and hobbies shoved down my throat from birth.

I release myself from feeling the need to make people happy at the expense of my identity.

I release myself from the grief and profound sadness of a father wanting me to be a “car person” or a “boat person” so badly that he cannot hear my protest.

I can say no. I will say no.

I release myself from the grief of saving my father’s life as he fell into a coma and not being there for my mother when she died.

I can turn down any requests to work on a car without shame. It’s okay to turn down involvement with my father’s recently purchased 1950’s scrapyard-looking pickup truck and there’s no shame in it. I refuse to burden myself with the same shame and self-loathing anxiety I felt every time I told that man I don’t want to be involved with a boat day or a car project and he used words of disappointment and guilt tripping that cut like knives.

There is no need to be a mechanically inclined person just to make one man happy. His words, beliefs and expectations are his own and do not need to reflect on me in any way.

There was plenty of other essential knowledge that man neglected to teach. I don’t need to get hung up on his responses to me refusing to celebrate his way or share in his definition of fun.

[charliebraincharliebrain]

I do not wish I was different. I am doing the best I can. I am excited to continue to grow and evolve into the best version of myself, but I do not wish I was a fundamentally different person because then I wouldn’t be me.

Someone in the meeting today said our identity is constructed by our experiences and our environment; my identity is, for better or for worse, constructed around my abandonment wound. This means I love and feel things very deeply, which makes loss and grief feel especially difficult and makes the happy feelings all the more joyful and all consuming.

I am glad to be who I am. I’m not going to change that for anyone. I am going to get better at processing it and communicating, but I am not going to change who I am or apologise for it. I will apologise for causing harm, but I am not going to apologise for who I am.

[patience-hope-strength-courage]

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A post shared by Dr Lalitaa Suglani (@dr.lalitaa)

Shared From Instagram, Not My Own Post.

[insomniadude]

it’s hard to not give in to the collapse of my abandoned foundation when those who have once felt at home in my arms have all found a new address

[unwelcome-ozian]

[fractal-unfoldment]

If rejection, desertion, or betrayal played a part in your loss, it is not just your sense of security that has been shattered but your belief in yourself, your sense of self-worth.

Susan Anderson, The Journey from Abandonment to Healing

[cheesy-cheddar-sadness]

imagining your tragic death because your boyfriend told you to go away is irrational

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

How much longer 'til your luck runs out?

[First] Prev <–-> Next

[n03t1c]

Dear mom,

I’m not a balanced person. I’ve become corrupt and unsettled.

It’s you who fucked me up on a daily basis.

For years I made excuses for you, tried to convince myself you didn’t hate me.

The evidence proved otherwise.

I took all the sadness. I took all the fear. I took all the pain.

I turned it into a wall to protect myself.

I’m so protected now, sometimes I feel like I’m barely alive.

And I hate you for it.

[charliebraincharliebrain]

Im realising the songs that make me cry are hooked into my fear of abandonment (as most things are), but they’re all also deeply calming and weirdly regulating songs too.

If We Were Vampires

You’ve Got a Friend

Leaving on a Jetplane

You Are My Sunshine

Enchanted

Transatlanticism

A Lack of Color

What You’re Thinking

I’m Afraid of the Things I Can’t Control

[wanna-say]

As much as I say I hate the idea of being in love

I long for love with very same depth I hate it.

I know love doesn't exist but I am still ready to walk on the eggshells with a person who if can't heal my wounds can see it without turning eyes

[patience-hope-strength-courage]

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A post shared by Dr. Nicole LePera (@the.holistic.psychologist)

Shared From Instagram, Not My Own Post.

[lostmf]