#Zack Fair let's play | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

rivkae-winters · 3 months

Text

Zack Fair, Violence, and Tragedy

Over the last month or two I’ve seen several posts about the nature of Zack Fair’s tragedy and his seeming heel-toe-turn and thought I’d chime in.

Also like last time: this is only my interpretation of canon, there is no one true analysis to take as gospel. If you disagree/differ in opinion/even just want to talk please reblog or dm! I enjoy talking to other people about this sort of thing, fandom is all about discussion after all!

While I agree with the sentiment I’ve seen going around that Zack’s relationship to violence plays a role there are other nuances and factors at play here. I’d argue that it’s more accurate to say that Zack is becoming more aware of personal and professional culture outside of SOLDIER and outside of both ShinRa’s constraining grip and Angeal’s attempts at protection. Even then it takes great personal tragedy caused by the inherent contradictions of ShinRa’s reality for him to realize that he has functionally been on the wrong side.

Sure he’s not callous like Cloud is in the beginning of original and Remake, but he certainly isn’t horrified at his actions just because there is violence. I’d argue the violence of his actions isn’t the main horror to him in isolation. I’d argue that even the death that results from violence isn’t what the core of the issue is either.

Zack’s hinging point is more his loyalty and his pride. What he does for other people and what he believes in and of himself. Specifically these things in conjunction with his desire to be a good person.

The language of Pride, the non-localized direct translation of the word hokori or 誇り(JP CC Script), is what’s going to be used here rather than Honor.

誇り | Hokori - To take pride in; To boast of

Definition Sources: 1, 2, 3

Just keep in mind that I’ve written this from as neutral a point of view as possible on the matter of pride since the Western perception definitively does not apply. To be proud is not a crime and it is not foolish it simply is.

Zack initially places his pride in SOLDIER- in what being a SOLDIER means to him. In how being a SOLDIER is his and that they are his people and thus he lets ShinRa policies define how he frames his morality. Thus ShinRa defines good in Zack Fair’s life.

Zack wants to be a hero. He wants to help people. He is trusting and kind and respectful to people consistently outside of the conflict of the mass desertion. Zack genuinely wants to be a good person and help other people, good or otherwise. He is led to believe by ShinRa propaganda that the best way to help people or to be anything meaningful in this world is through them. This is a baited trap that he falls into, Zack is prime prey this trap was intended to catch.

He is angry at Genesis and horrified by Angeal, especially at the beginning, not for cruelty or violence or even really death… He is angry at them for their betrayal. Sure he is violent and angry in the instance he thinks Angeal has murdered his own mother, as with Genesis and his parents, but that does not define his antagonism, his hatred, his regret, his sense of justice with them at all.

Zack does not raise his sword at Genesis for the people of Banora, he raises his sword for SOLDIER.

Zack understandably feels, and has been, betrayed.

He is hurt and angry and alone in a way he’s never been since he got into the SOLDIER program. He falls deeper into the illusions of ShinRa for that reason, angry and hurting and grieving the life he had with people in it who will never return. There is a deep sense of nostalgia throughout Crisis Core in the sense of the word’s initial meaning: the pain of missing home. Specifically the homes we find in people.

Even as he believes in ShinRa's twisted reality Zack wants to help. He wants to protect those he cares for. Zack wants to be good. Unfortunately in Zack Fair’s life the undisputed definition of good is now written by the ShinRa Electric Power Corporation alone.

Then he meets Aerith.

Suddenly ShinRa’s version of right and wrong have opposition but the control that ShinRa has over his life, total and complete as it is, prevents that from sinking in. Zack is perceptive though, around Aerith he is her version of good and then he has to go back to what equates to his phase of reality. A sanctuary is not safe, not truly, when watchers are peering in through the back door ready to drag you out by your feet if you misstep.

Zack wants to be a man Aerith or anyone won’t be scared of. He wants to do that not because he is suddenly horrified at his own violence but rather in consideration of others. Zack is highly empathetic after all once he can see someone else’s perspective. He wants to be what Aerith wants, even if he doesn’t really and truly understand it yet, because he cares about her and cares about her opinion. He cares about her comfort. Zack still puts most of his pride within SOLDIER though. That means that Aerith’s morals cannot sink through his skin to his center, not like Angeal’s had. She makes him think but she is not shaping his mind, he is left to do that himself.

Zack spends a lot of time questioning Angeal and being upset at and about him off screen even more than on screen. We don’t get a front row seat for all of it. The big takeaway is that Zack doesn’t shed Angeal’s morals that he’s taken on himself. He can’t after all, not with ShinRa only just seeming tarnished. ShinRa would need to rust and crumble fully before he actually can let them go. Before he can be free in his own mind.

ShinRa chips and rusts in an instant under Sephiroth’s hand. The last holdout crumbled in the fight of two victims of ShinRa and someone who will become one soon. ShinRa is no longer the defined of good, not after what Zack sees is the response to the Nibelheim Incident.

ShinRa not being good, worse even ShinRa being bad breaks the entire morality system. The illusions crack and Zack is forced to examine himself, his actions, and his biases in ways Aerith made him want to but that he couldn’t afford to truly indulge in. Even more that he was scared of self introspection in a sense, of the paradigm of his reality shifting even further.

He eventually truly reframes his actions and has to reckon with them (and himself) at the end of the game, chapter 9 and onwards. It is only then that he actually LOOKS and is fully horrified by what he sees of himself. That horror only progresses as he fights for both his and Cloud’s lives. That horror only builds as he realizes he’s exactly the person who his girlfriend SHOULD be terrified of despite his best attempts- that he’s everything she was talking about. He’s everything she was talking about even after trying to change the way he acts around her.

To abuse the innate metaphors: Zack Fair goes to Nibelheim, a well trained attack dog, still seeing relatively little wrong with fulfilling ShinRa’s orders. Zack is only then on the cusp of figuring out that he does not want to be there, that he is the antagonist of the planet’s (and Aerith’s) story unwittingly.

Zack Fair leaves Nibelheim beaten. He tries to go back to the safety of what was once his home prior to ShinRa only to be waylaid.

Zack Fair leaves Banora free and irrevocably changed.

He is free in the sense that the illusions he held himself too are crumbling even more with knowledge that his demons are men too. He is free through the knowledge that he is one of those demons. , that he has been shaped to be one, and that good intentions pave a terribly walkable path to hell.

Zack leaves with the knowledge that he was the monster in the closet. The knowledge that his sword was not just the executioner’s blade but the enforcer’s. The sword kept clean in favor of bloody hands and higher risks is now drowning in pools of it. Zack leaves with the knowledge that he never would have been truly free.

Yet he is in the sense that he can choose- actually choose- what he wants, what he values. He chooses Aerith and he chooses Cloud as he has each time before. He chooses violence. It is something he knows and among what he is good at. It is not all he is but it is a tool he can use.

He chooses to pay the price of freedom.

Crisis Core is a tragedy and Zack and Genesis both are tragic figures at its center. Zack’s arc is angled to the viewer for maximum effect but Genesis’s does mirror it in a way just on an offset path already initiated. Sephiroth is also a tragic character, undeniably so. However structure wise his role is more murky given the way he has the ability to be the god waiting in the machine, a guaranteed victory or unavoidable altered trajectory should he choose to act, for most of the story.

And that’s a large part of why I love Zack as a character, aside from things I’ve said before about what makes him such a good narrator. Zack is the unlucky prodigy at the center of a story about wars, abusers, connections, and perspectives. He wants to be good, he wants to be a person that helps.

He can’t, not really, not in the way he wants.

Crisis Core is a cautionary tale about exactly that going wrong and how anyone can be taken advantage of.

#zack fair #ff7 #ffvii #crisis core #ff7 crisis core #angeal hewley #genesis rhapsodos #rivkae writes #long post #Sephiroth is the deus ex machina functionally for cc and I adore that and about him #and what it does to his arc #If anything it aids in his feeling alienated since his power and control over the narrative LITERALLY separates him from the world #puts chasms between himself and the people that he considers his fellows that he despises but that is a post for another day #i need a tag for analysis or something #random unprompted essay be upon ye #riv’s lil rants

135 notes · View notes

cobaltperun · 9 months

Text

Lost (9) - Lost

Tara Carpenter x Female Reader

Summary: To anyone on the outside, and to Tara’s friends, you were Tara’s fierce protector, the MMA fighter who’d take anyone on for Tara. The Guard Dog, as Amber called you. You had no idea you’d have to protect her from people who claimed they loved her. It didn’t matter. As long as you and Tara had one another there was nothing you wouldn’t be able to survive.

Story warnings: Scream violence, family issues, trauma, angst, certain sensitive topics

Word count: 6.9k

Story masterlist / First part / Previous part / Next part

-I'm lost in these memories living behind my own illusion. Lost all my dignity living inside my own confusion-

It was suffocating, the entire house, the clean, white walls let like they were closing in on you, the furniture, custom made and as huge as the ego of your parents felt like it would fall on top of you any moment now, and you were stuck there, unable to move.

You were ten and your entire world fell apart. It wasn’t fair, it just wasn’t fair. Zack wasn’t dead, he couldn’t be dead! Your father had to be lying!

“He’s dead,” he repeated, looking like he was talking about spilled milk, and you felt sick, you felt lightheaded, your legs couldn’t hold your weight and you dropped to your hands and knees, sobbing uncontrollably, your fists clenching as your body shook. “Stop crying, Y/N,” he ordered, his tone harsh and unforgiving, and it made you flinch as you covered you mouth to stop the sobs, but you couldn’t stop the tears, they just kept falling.

Your mother grabbed your shoulders and pulled you to your feet so hard you nearly fell back. “Go to your room, your father is expecting important guests,” she ushered you to go upstairs, to be the obedient daughter. And you did just that, running up the stairs while your legs felt like they would crumble under your weight, just so you could get to your room.

Once inside you stumbled to your bed and pulled a small toy boxer from behind your pillow. Tears fell on it as you held it close. The only gift Zack gave you that you managed to keep, to smuggle into your room without your parents noticing. Anything else they took, and you never saw it again, photos, toys, books, it didn’t matter what Zack got for you, it was gone. So, aside from the toy boxer, he gave you his time, as much as he could, and he gave you the basics of martial arts, he taught them to you, he taught you discipline better than anything your parents ever signed you up for. You buried your face in the pillow, muffling your cries and screams, you were alone now, you lost your brother.

You didn’t know how long it took you to stop crying, by the time you did the Sun was getting low and you were just too exhausted to keep sobbing.

Even now, at ten years old, you felt the room you were in wasn’t who you were. It was, as your mother described it, a girl’s room, flowery and colorful, filled with clothes appropriate for your parents’ wealth and a customary violin they wanted you to learn how to play. You were meant to grow into a young lady that scoffed at anything even mildly violent, someone who relied on other people to cook and clean for you, and if you really wanted to, you would get the education needed to take over your father’s company.

That’s who you were supposed to be, but meeting Zack changed that.

And you found your passion in martial arts and the vision your parents had of you would never come true.

But, just like you took away their vision of their perfect daughter, they took the toy boxer away, taking the only remaining physical reminders of your brother away. Only allowing you to go to the funeral because you wouldn’t shut up about it. And to completely remove you from those memories they chose to move, hoping that maybe, leaving the city you spent so much time with Zack in, would made those memories fade away. At the start of 2012, two months after Zack’s death you and your parents moved to Woodsboro.

Woodsboro was a strange experience at first, a small town, with people suspicious of anyone new. You didn't care, you were still shaken by the loss, shaken by being torn from the life you had. Looking back now, there wasn't much of a life there, but to a ten-year-old you that was all you had. Especially after losing Zack.

Two weeks into your time in Woodsboro you just walked around, figuring out where what was when you noticed a tiny girl pushing a bicycle and carrying a bag. She was alone, and she seemed to be struggling. Why was a girl who didn't look older than seven all on her own with a bicycle that looked like it would be too big even for you?

The girl your parents raised would have minded your own business and avoided any attention. Zack taught you to be better than that.

"Uh, hey," you approached her awkwardly. She raised her head when she figured out you were talking to her. The first thing you noticed upon a closer look were her expressive brown eyes and freckles on her face. "Need help?"

She seemed genuinely surprised, but at the same time looked weary. You couldn't blame her, this was the first time she had seen you. "No, but thanks for offering help," she gave you a small, shy smile and walked by you.

Well, you weren't about to force her into accepting help. You offered, she didn't accept it, so you shrugged. But then she began coughing and dropped to her knees, her bicycle falling to the side as some of the content from her bag spilled out. You ran up to her since there was no one nearby to do it instead.

"Hey, are you sick or something?" you had no idea what to do, you were ten and confused and not used to situations like this one.

The girl nodded, pulling out something and taking a breath. Something that helped her breathe? "Asthma," she muttered. "I'm fine now, I'm sorry," you didn't understand why she was apologizing, but you began picking her things up. You noticed it was mostly food that was quick to make and cheap, but you didn't comment on that.

"Hey! Stay away from Tara!" health complications weren't something you were used to reacting to, but sudden fights definitely were. You jumped to your feet, grabbing the fist before it could reach your face. The girl that attacked you was a few inches taller than you, and she was definitely stronger as she pushed you back hard enough to make you stumble and fall.

"No, Sammy, she was helping," the smaller girl quickly hugged this ‘Sammy’ from behind.

"Oh. Sorry, I didn't recognize you, so," she trailed off, looking uncomfortable all of a sudden.

You frowned and huffed as you got up, really not liking that she went with the 'swing first, ask questions later' approach. "Right, I'll be leaving now," you just backed away and left the two. Hopefully, you won't run into them that often, because this was not a good first impression.

~X~

Something really seemed to push you and the girl together, because it only took a week at school to see her again. Or, well, she bumped into you.

"I'm sorry! I'm late for class!" she ran off before you could even comprehend what just happened.

"Huh, her again," you mumbled to yourself and then realized what she said. "I'm late!" there was no time to think about another chance meeting.

Ever since then, there have been small encounters, seeing each other in the hall, and coming across each other on the street. Never a conversation though, you still didn't exchange names, though the girl that attacked you said 'Tara' so maybe that was the girl's name. You really liked that name for some reason. You felt like it fit the girl.

The first time you spoke it was actually December of that year. So, nearly a year went by with occasional glances here and there, simply acknowledging that the other existed. The school had this kinda awful karate class, but it was the only martial arts they had, so you went. Which was why you stayed at school after classes. It was a downpour outside, and you were not eager to leave, but, there was no telling if the rain would slow down. So, you pulled your hood over your head and stepped outside.

That was when you noticed her, trembling at the entrance, clearly not dressed for this cold, well she had a jacket on, that was too big for her, but it wasn’t much of a protection from this. She was soaked from head to toe from the rain, alone. Again.

"You'll get sick, at least get inside the school," you tilted your head to the side as you spoke to the girl. And she had asthma, and you didn’t know much about it, but you knew enough to understand getting sick especially bad for her.

She looked up. "Mom won't see me if I'm inside and she'll leave," the girl said as if it was the most obvious reason in the history of reasons.

"Since when are you waiting?" you asked, honestly hoping she also had some after-class activities because the alternative was her freezing in this rain for an hour and a half.

"Since school ended," yeah, you doubted her mother was coming. What kind of parent would make their child wait like this? At least your parents made it clear they wouldn’t pick you up from school, regardless of the weather.

You frowned, wondering if there were any alternative solutions. The school bus was long gone. You didn't know if the local bus went near the girl's house, and you didn't have a phone. "Can you walk?"

She shook her head. "I'm tired," now that you paid a bit more attention to her you figured you were wrong. She wasn't going to get sick. She already was. Her face was red, and her voice was a bit raspy. And she just spent an hour and a half standing in the rain. "Mom isn't coming, is she?" she asked, her eyes brimming with unshed tears, but she tried to stay strong. What else could she do, she was on her own, too tired to walk to her house.

"Probably not. Come on, I'll take you home," you took your bag off and turned your back to her. "Get on," when she didn't you figured she maybe couldn't climb on your back as sick as she was, so you crouched down. "Sorry, I wasn't thinking."

"N-No, it's okay, I, I'm fine," she stammered, and you only held your umbrella out to her.

"You're light, I won't even feel you," well, you would, after some time, but you could handle it. Hey, it would be a good exercise. "I'm Y/N, in case that was weird because you didn't know my name."

You turned your head around and saw she had the same expression she had when you offered to help her when you first saw each other. Like she hasn’t experienced more than basic kindness in a long time.

"Please, I wouldn't be able to sleep well if I just left you here," you tried, offering her your hand. Reluctantly she took it and took that step closer to you. Seeing that she agreed with your idea you went back to the previous position and waited.

"Thanks. I'm Tara," she sounded really shy all of a sudden. "I'm sorry Sam pushed you before," you wondered why she still remembered that when you felt her get on your back and put her hands on your shoulders. You got up as if she wasn't even there. Just how light was this girl? Definitely too light. Even for her age. You wondered for a moment if she had proper meals. Given her mother didn’t come to pick her up you weren’t so sure she was being properly taken care of.

"Don't worry, as long as she doesn't do it again," you chuckled and handed her the umbrella. "Uh, my hands are kinda full, so if you don't mind?"

Tara nodded, taking the umbrella and opening it just as you stepped into the rain. It didn't shield you much, but it helped. "How old are you?" you figured you might as well pass some time while you were walking to Tara's house.

"I'll turn ten in a week," she said. "You?"

Ten? She was about to turn ten?! This girl? How?! She was tiny! You thought she was eight at best!

"Uh, Y/N," she squeezed your shoulder a bit.

You cleared your throat awkwardly. "Sorry, I thought you were younger. I'm eleven," you finally replied.

"Mean," oh, she definitely understood what you were implying.

"Sorry, sorry, look at it from the brighter side, if you were bigger I wouldn't be able to carry you home," you tried to cheer her up a bit.

"Yeah, that really makes up for being short," ooh, sarcasm, you liked that.

"Exactly!" you chuckled as if you thought she was serious.

Tara groaned and hid her face behind your shoulder, but you heard a tiny giggle despite the rain.

And that was the start. The actual start.

~X~

Tomorrow you didn’t see Tara in the halls, you expected as much, but yesterday she told you what class she was in so you went and asked one of the kids in her class if she came to school. That’s how you confirmed she didn’t come to school, so, without bothering to tell your parents, because they wouldn’t notice anyway, you made your way to her house.

Boldly and without a hint of hesitation you walked up to her front doors and knocked a few times. No one answered, so you tried again, and again until finally you heard someone yelling they were coming. The woman that opened the doors looked somewhat like Tara, with dark hair and eyes, but she didn’t exactly look sober.

“What do you want runt?” the woman asked, confused by your presence.

“Good afternoon. I’m sorry if I’m bothering you, I’m here to see Tara,” you went for the polite approach, not really sure what else would work.

The woman nodded. “She’s a bit sick, but sure, go upstairs, you’ll hear her,” you raised an eyebrow at that. You’ll hear Tara?

“Thank you,” you quickly thanked the woman and slipped your shoes off before going up the stairs. You did hear Tara, as the woman said you would, because she was coughing. “Shit,” you cursed under your breath. Just how sick was she? You approached the doors and knocked.

“Come in,” came raspy and confused voice.

You opened the doors and waved at the girl. “Hey, you, uh, didn’t come to school, so I figured I could drop by to check on you,” you smiled sheepishly at her astonished face, but she didn’t sit up, she was too sick.

“Y/N?” she rubbed her eyes as if she couldn’t believe what she was seeing.

“One and only,” you grinned as you approached her.

Tara giggled a bit, but that made her start coughing again.

“Easy,” you were reminded of Zack a bit before he died, and you remembered he would sleep while half-sitting up when it became too difficult to breathe. He said his body was exhausted fighting the heart issues, and because of that he easily got sick near the end of his life, only making his life even shorter. So, remembering that you went up to Tara and lifted her upper body up, much to her confusion, but it stopped her coughing for a bit while you looked around for something to prop the pillow up with. Eventually, you noticed a smaller pillow next to her and used it to lift her pillow higher. “This should help a bit, I think,” you lowered her back to the pillow and she smiled weakly.

“Thanks, it’s easier to breathe now,” she whispered and patted the spot next to her. “Stay with me for a bit?”

You nodded, and the two of you just sat there in silence, already strangely comfortable in each other’s presence. Half an hour later the doors opened again and you turned to see Sam standing there, baffled and confused.

“You’re… the one from that day? The girl I pushed? Y/N?” she asked, not sure how to react to you being there, but then she looked at Tara and visibly relaxed.

“Yeah, nice to meet you, properly I mean,” you grinned a bit and Sam just nodded.

~X~

After that the chance meetings turned into quick chats between classes or at least a high-five and a smile as you passed by one another. By the end of the month, you sometimes walked Tara home, carrying her if she was too tired and just chatting and joking on your way home. It didn’t matter your house was in the opposite direction, because you enjoyed her company way more than whatever was waiting for you at home.

Before you knew it, sometime after the holidays were over, she was tugging on your sleeve to meet a group of kids that were a bit younger than her.

“This is Y/N, my best friend!” she introduced you and you couldn’t hide your surprise. You were her best friend?

“Hey! We heard you like karate!” one of the boys, Chad greeted you cheerily.

You could work with that. “Martial arts in general, but sure I like karate as well,” you grinned, though your grin dropped when he rushed at you. You just pulled Tara to the side and let him run by you. “Uh, what were you trying to do?” you asked, chuckling uncomfortably as he tripped and fell into the snow, causing the other three kids to laugh.

“I was trying to tackle you! You like martial arts so I wanted to see if you were any good at it,” he got up and brushed the snow off his pants and jacket.

“So, don’t rushed at her like Pikachu!” the girl that looked a lot like him, his twin Mindy, from what Tara told you, teased him, causing another round of laughter.

That was how it was back then. Chad had Wes, and Mindy had Amber, so, before you came along Tara was the kid with asthma they met because Sam used to babysit them that was now in their grade because she had to repeat a year. Amber took liking to Tara and pulled her into the group, but Tara didn’t have her own best friend at the moment. So, you filled that gap. You were her best friend.

That being said, Amber was still the one who gave name to the role you played in Tara's life.

About half a year into the newfound friendship Tara invited you to go to a picnic with her and her friends. It wasn't even going to be much of a picnic since there wouldn't be anything to eat other than some snacks, but it was a chance to get out of home, so you accepted.

You joined the group at the park and high-fived Tara before waving to the other four. "Mindy, Chad, Wes, Amber," you grinned and sat down next to Tara as the four greeted you back.

The day was going the same way it usually did, usual banter, usual jokes, Amber trying to keep Tara's attention on her, Mindy teasing Wes, Chad trying to get into a joke scuffle with you and you, of course, not backing down from said competition, all the while Tara caught you up with what happened to her over the past few days.

Eventually, Chad, bored and mischievous as he was, grabbed Tara's bottle just as she was about to take it.

Tara was still tiny, and Chad didn't have to try to keep the bottle away from her. "Just say please Tara," Chad teased her by waving the bottle just out of her reach.

Tara smirked a bit. "Please, right?" she asked and Chad, now slightly confused nodded. She glanced at you, smiling as she saw you looking right at her while you lay down on the grass. "Y/N."

You couldn't help but snicker as you sat up, really impressed by how bold she got when you were with her. Chad caved in before you had the chance to get to your feet and you all shared a laugh.

Amber shook her head. "I'm telling you all, Y/N is Tara's guard dog," Amber laughed to cover it up as a joke, but there was a bit of malice behind those words.

You turned to Chad as soon as the laughter settled down. "Woof, woof?" and the six of you were once again laughing.

It became a bit of a running joke, really, that Tara only had to say your name in some situations, and you'd be right by her side. 'Tara calls and you bark,' was the original joke. The guard dog never bites though because it was always with friends. It was always small things that couldn't lead to violence. Guarding Tara from a stray ball in the park, or keeping her from falling if she tripped next to you, small things like that were why Amber began calling you the guard dog and others accepted the nickname.

And then the joke changed into 'Tara barks and you bite', because the guard dog bit. You got into a fight.

~X~

You were a couple of months away from turning fourteen and you just found out your parents chose not to help Zack. Your father wouldn't help to pay for the medicine and Susan had no way of getting enough money. She was already in debt for medical bills and couldn't even sell the house. Your father came from money, not old, old money, but his parents were rich enough to help him get very rich. To the point where he wouldn't even feel the medical bills.

He and your mother, plain and simple, didn't want to do it. 'Good riddance,' your father said. 'No son of his was a barbaric, violent no-good fighter.'

Your temper was short, you could feel anger rising within you in less time than it took to snap fingers. That's how short your fuse was. Somehow, the only exception to that anger was Tara.

Woodsboro was usually quiet, but a new Stab movie had just released, and some tourists were bound to come by. One of them got you to snap.

Tara had begged you to go see The Babadook with her when it finally came to your local cinema. So, you, of course, went with her. It was a good movie, though you probably wouldn't go to see it if it wasn't for Tara. Tara loved it though, it was her new favorite thing, and from the looks of it that wouldn't change any time soon.

"Man, that movie sucked!" someone complained as you were getting out and Tara turned around.

"No, it didn't!" she immediately argued, being with you gave Tara more confidence, the girl that was startled and timid when you met and when you finally spoke again that day in the rain was nowhere to be found. She was getting bolder, more confident in herself, and you being with her gave her that sense of safety that allowed her to act like that.

"What?" the guy that said The Babadook sucked was maybe two or three years older than you.

"It's a great movie," Tara declared boldly.

The guy laughed and was probably about to dismiss her, but then he raised an eyebrow. "Aren't you Samantha's sister? Tell your sister to get me my money for she'll know what," he suddenly got really serious and you stepped between him and Tara.

"Back off," you firmly stated.

"Yeah? Or what?" he challenged.

"Sam doesn't owe you anything," Tara said as she stepped next to you.

That, apparently made him angry. "Really now? She doesn't? So maybe you can give me my money?" he reached forward, and you just went and did it. You slammed a right uppercut into his jaw, and he fell on the ground. Security got called, he didn't want to call the police, for his own sake, and you got off with a warning from security and a year-long ban from the cinema. What a tragedy that was.

Perhaps it was because she could tell how tense you were, but that was the first time Tara held your hand as you walked to her house. It was a loose hold, but it was a hold, nonetheless.

"Sorry, I lost control there," could the guy get violent? Maybe. Would he? Perhaps. He still didn't exactly do anything that warranted a punch like that.

"It's okay, thanks for having my back there," she whispered and tightened her hold on your hand.

"Well, Amber does say I'm your guard dog," you chuckled, gradually calming down now that you were sure everything was okay. Rumors spread eventually and by the end of it, the tale of punching a slightly older guy turned into getting into a fight with two adults. Well, at least it got the message across as you officially became her guard dog that day. Don't mess with Tara.

~X~

Sam left about a year later, shortly after Tara turned thirteen, you and Tara kept spending time together, you made a deal with your parents that you’d be free once you turned eighteen, that you could leave and that you would play your role of a good daughter until then. And you did, for about three years you did just that, only breaking that deal once, a few months before you turned eighteen.

Tara came over to your place for once. You’d watch a movie in your room, eat a lunch, and then you’d do some homework together. You had an assignment about movies and Tara could easily help you with that and you would help her with some homework she was struggling with at the moment. The day was going great, until it was time to eat lunch, and since it was Sunday both of your parents were home.

You were getting better and better when it came to cooking, and today you were making a risotto for Tara and you. In a way you were lucky that Tara didn’t question why you didn’t make any for your parents as you set the two plates down.

Your father came into the kitchen to make himself a tea, it was one thing he always made for himself, because he had a very specific amount of milk he wanted added to it. And he came in with his cigar freshly lit and you saw red.

“Get out,” you warned, already getting up to open the window.

“No,” yet he refused, exhaling a long puff of smoke as he poured water into the kettle.

You didn’t want to even spare the time to argue, he knew Tara had asthma, you made it clear several times that you wouldn’t let anyone smoke near her. So, you just briskly walked over to him, grabbed the cigar before he could react, put it out and chucked it through the window.

Tara gasped, seeing the anger flash in your father’s eyes as the two of you glared at each other, you weren’t backing down.

“I told you to get out. I told you I don’t want anyone smoking near Tara,” you reminded him as he bared his teeth.

“Insolent child,” his tone was low, but you’ve learnt a long time ago that it was more of a bluff than anything, a tough act of a coward.

Tara didn’t know that. She just saw you and your father being tense, as if you would start arguing any moment now. And she got up, running up to you and pulling you back. “Y/N, please, let’s just go to your room. Or to my place, please Baby,” she tried to get you to look at her, but you just made sure she was behind you, and not between you and your father.

“Baby?” your father’s eyes widened. “Baby?!” he yelled and Tara flinched, hiding behind you and you saw red. He scared Tara. “You are going to stop associating with this girl, Y/N!” he ordered.

“I’m sorry,” Tara whispered just loud enough for you to hear and the red haze faded away, you couldn’t lose it now, it would only make things worse.

You just took her hand, squeezing it gently while glaring at your father. “Try to stop me, see what happens,” you warned, daring him to try and do anything, to raise his hand, to even try to hit you. He wasn’t stupid, by that point you’ve already spent over half your life training martial arts.

He snarled, but seeing he couldn’t intimidate you he just backed away, leaving the kitchen as the kettle whistled.

With him gone you pulled Tara into your arms and the sixteen-year-old girl clung to you as if she was afraid you’d vanish if she let go of you. You held her just as tightly before tucking a stray strand of hair back to its place. “I don’t care what he says,” you assured her gently and felt her relaxing a bit at that, but she still held onto you and you, honestly, didn’t mind. And as you held her in your arms, as her presence alone calmed you down from your anger, as you felt how wildly your heart was beating at her proximity, you realized what you should have realized some time before that, you realized you were in love with Tara.

~X~

Half a year later you had your first fight, you won, but you came back to Woodsboro a day later with bruises all over your body and several nasty swellings. Your lower lip was busted, and not just a bit. There were a few small cuts on your face, from punches and the one on your forehead nearly cost you the fight. Overall, you were in awful shape and just wanted to get into your apartment and sleep through the pain. You didn’t expect to see Tara outside your doors, chewing on her lower lip as she waited for you.

“Hey,” you spoke softly, trying to smile, but it kinda hurt to do that, so you winced instead, and Tara turned to you with an unreadable expression on her face. You could see the worry and hurt in her eyes, but you struggled to identify anything else. “You should see the other woman,” you tried to joke lamely, but she just grabbed the keys you prepared and unlocked your apartment before dragging you inside.

You figured just behaving would be your best option, so you let her silently take care of you. She placed several ice packs on you, one over your eye, the other on your hurt left wrist, and the third she just applied on whatever bruise she could see for a few minutes at a time.

“Thanks,” you eventually said as you lowered the ice pack so you could properly look at Tara.

“Please don’t fight again,” she looked like she couldn’t take it, she was shaking, and frankly you were worried her asthma might get triggered.

You never wanted to get into this position, to basically choose between the memory of Zack and Tara. To choose between the only family that ever cared for you and the girl you loved and at the end of the day that was exactly what this choice was. It was painful, and you’d forever remember the look of utter rejection and even a hint of betrayal on Tara’s face when you finally replied

But… you couldn’t give up, even if Tara asked you to. You had to give it a shot, for Zack. “I can’t, Tara. This is what I chose to do, I just love fighting too much to stop after one fight,” you could only hope that she would understand, that this decision wouldn’t cost you your friendship with Tara. Given the look in her eyes, it wouldn’t go that far, and even as she nursed you back to health, she still looked unhappy, because you chose fighting.

Because you didn’t choose her.

~X~

You were Tara’s guard dog, you were her protector, you were a skilled, almost ridiculously trained MMA fighter, but you couldn't keep her safe. Not from Amber and Richie, or their sick plan, not from the trauma, not from what she was feeling. You couldn't punch her way out of this problem. It made you feel weak and helpless, it was like an overwhelming weight you couldn't shake off, and a part of it was your fault. Because you betrayed her trust by not telling her about your troubles sooner, and now she couldn't believe you.

You glanced at Tara, knowing full well she was still awake. You were fairly certain she spent some of the night crying, but she never called out to you, and you weren't about to push her into contact she didn't want. Her pushing your arm away, even if you understood to an extent, hurt no matter how hard you tried to reason with that choice.

~X~

Tara thought everything was getting better, or as good as it could get, but it just felt like every time she felt things were about to get better something happened and made it worse. Sam was back, her mother couldn't help herself and screamed at Sam almost any chance she got. Tara's wounds healed, for the most part, her left hand was damaged beyond repair. Your heart was healthy, you were fine, you were forced to retire from MMA. It all came back to her. Sam would have left by now, or rather she wouldn't have returned in the first place if it wasn't for Tara. Her hand was self-explanatory. You would still have your career if you didn't choose to get involved with Tara.

A voice in her head kept telling her she was the one to blame. That she couldn't get her father to love her enough to stay. That she couldn't be there for Sam. That she wasn't there when you needed her. That Amber maybe wouldn't have done everything she did if Tara was a better friend and then a better girlfriend. That so many people died and maybe there was something she could have done to prevent it. That you nearly died and that she shot you and that she had no right to say anything about your mark being the only one she'll ever wear.

She curled up as much as her leg allowed her to and clenched the sides of her head, thankful that you were getting ready in the bathroom. She pulled the blanket over her head, fearing that she really pushed you too far this time. You didn't even sleep in your own bed last night. She curled the fingers of her right hand around the collar of the shirt she wore that night, your shirt.

Your apartment, your bed, your shirt, your mark around her neck. You were her safe space, yet ever since she finally had a bit of time to think about it, she ended up convincing herself she wasn't giving you anything in return. Or if she was giving you something back, it wasn't enough.

"Tara?" she didn't even notice you coming back. She wished you would just reach out and touch her, but as touchy as the two of you were you never initiated contact unless Tara saw it coming. It wasn't just since Tara was first attacked, that's how it's always been. She didn't move, she didn't want you to see her face right now.

She heard a sigh and then what sounded like you just dropping to the floor. Scared you somehow got hurt, Tara turned around and saw you sitting on the floor with your back pressed against the side of the bed. She could see how tense your muscles were even with the shirt you had on; she could see how exhausted you were.

You needed rest and Tara was convinced she was the reason you needed it. Well, of course you needed rest. You’ve been taking care of Tara while recovering from your own wounds. Sam couldn’t carry Tara, so you did it. Sam felt guilty over Tara being attacked, and had troubles looking at Tara’s wounds, and since so many years passed Tara herself wasn’t entirely comfortable about being naked in front of Sam, so… you helped her when she needed to shower or wash her hair the first two weeks. Tara’s injuries and lack of anyone else but Sam that could help her made you act as if you weren’t injured at all, you barely rested at all.

You sighed and she couldn't remember ever hearing you sigh like that, like you were just about to reach your limit. "Tara, what do you want from me?" no, you were at your limit.

Tara, unsure of what exactly to tell you now, just went with the first thing that came to mind. "The truth. I want you to be honest," she only now realized how raspy her voice was. She reached for the water bottle on the nightstand only to see you already grabbing it and handing it to her, all without turning to look at her.

Your laugh was humorless, hollow, she hated it. "Well, there's our issue right there. You'll only trust a lie," you curled up, letting your forehead rest against your knees as your arms just dropped at your sides.

For a moment Tara thought that maybe, just maybe you were honest last night. That you really were fine with retiring. But she realized MMA wasn't just something you loved. She realized you did it as a way to remember your brother. "There's no way that can be the truth," she knew how protective of her you were, how you would keep what was bothering you inside just so she wouldn't be worried.

Your reaction was instantaneous. You got up so abruptly and forcefully that Tara felt the bed hitting the wall. "Why can't you just accept that I'm fine with retiring?" you still wouldn't look at her, but you began pacing around in what little space the apartment offered. Your movement was rigid, eyes clamped shut as you ran your hand through your hair, more frustrated than Tara ever saw you before.

You were tired and frustrated. "Y/N, please," Tara wanted, needed you to calm down. She wouldn't be able to reach you if you were this frustrated.

"Y/N, please," you repeated dejectedly. "Please what exactly? Please say you aren't fine?" you finally looked at her, your jaw clenching so hard Tara was surprised you didn't crack a tooth. And the way you looked at her. Frustrated, exhausted, pleading for her to trust you.

Tara met your eyes as much as it hurt to see you like that. "You said you were fine before. You weren't." she choked out.

You turned your head to the side, blinking rapidly. "So what? Now you'll think I'm going to fall apart every time something doesn't go my way?" you asked incredulously, there was clear accusation in your eyes, anger directed right at Tara, caused by what she just said.

It wasn't that! You were strong, you weren't going to, fall apart, as you put it! She just wanted you to rely on her enough to trust her with how you felt. "It's not that!" she had no idea what she was thinking as she, without her crutches, stumbled to her feet.

You froze only for a moment and then rushed to hold her. "What are you doing?" you hissed, holding her up. You didn't lift her, but almost all her weight was on you.

Despite the warmth of your skin seeping through the shirt she was wearing she still felt cold. This wasn't the usual way you touched her, there was restraint, anger, reluctance, behind the way you held her. She hated that you felt all that and still went to hold her. That's what frightened her the most. That you'd keep doing it like this, that you'd hold her and love her despite blaming her for what was happening to you. She feared that she wasn’t good for you, and that you’d still love her anyway.

So, she made a split-second decision. "Y/N, if you really are fine," the words got stuck in her throat.

"What?" the question came out harsh, impatient, pushing the words she struggled to say out.

"Leave me."

You froze, your hold on her loosening enough for her to pull back and stumble to her crutches. This was the best option. You'd either be honest with her, or you'd continue the lie and leave. Both would be good for you, Tara figured. She's been nothing but the reason for all your pain lately. She's been that way before she was attacked. She's been that since she got together with Amber. So, this was what it was. The lost MMA career was the last drop. Your wounds healed, your time apart could be made up for, but she couldn't fix this. "I'll call Sam to pick me up," she reassured you, frankly, surprised at how shell-shocked and still you were.

You didn't say a single word and from the corner of Tara's tear-filled eye she saw you just taking a deep breath and nodding to yourself as if thinking: 'Yeah, should have seen this coming,'

You asked her what she wanted, and she told you to leave her. Those words immediately hurt her, yet it would take two days for those words to start haunting her.

Story masterlist / First part / Previous part / Next part

#tara carpenter x reader #tara carpenter x female reader #tara carpenter x you #tara carpenter #scream #jenna ortega x reader #x reader #x female reader

286 notes · View notes

missyandthemisfits · 7 months

Text

FF7 Headcanons – Do They Like Their Partner Playing In Their Hair?

I write sometimes so Imma put some Final Fantasy VII headcannons here in honor of tomorrow’s release 🍷🍾

Cloud Strife – He absolutely does, he also absolutely won’t own up to it because he’s EMBARRASED. That said, if you really wanna hear him say it that badly, you can always threaten to never do it again. He’ll pout, complain softly, and confess. THEN he’ll immediately ask you to do it.

Tifa Lockhart – YesssSS, she adores it! But she makes you wait until you’re alone to do it because she is CONVINCED she makes questionable faces when you do it. She does. She does make those faces-

Aerith Gainsborough – You’d better believe she does and is happy to return the favor! She might actually be better than you at it though…awesome scalp massages.

Barett Wallance – Not really…? But he can be convinced. Especially after a long, hard day and a hot shower.

Cid Highwind – NOPE. Don’t even try it, you’ll get an earful and will NEVER hear the end of it, I assure you.

Vincent Valentine – He is FIRMLY on the fence about it. On one hand, it feels amazing and he really does love it. On the other hand, he’s still convinced he just doesn’t deserve that kindness, from you or anyone. You may or may not be able to get him to agree to it, depending on the day.

Reeve Tuesti – He does indeed like it and he is also not afraid to ask for it. Hell, he’ll ask for it mid-speech sometimes, right in the middle of the explaining something to the party members. You will probably say no.

Reno Sinclair – YES, for the love of God, PLEASE play in his hair. I cannot stress this enough, HE HAS NO SHAME. He will beg, with or without company, outside or inside your home. He does not care how it looks to those around him, he’s a man that knows what he wants an when he wants it.

Rude – I wheeze, but yes. He enjoys…scalp massages.

Elena – She actually only likes it when and if you wash her hair for her while you’re doing it, something about the combination of nails and water – she’s a little strange, but it’s cute.

Tseng – Another fence straddler, but he’s a lot easier to convince. For him, it’s about intimacy, something you two share that he doesn’t wanna share with anyone else so it stays in home – because he’s a little possessive.

Rufus Shinra – Oh yes, he definitely enjoys it – he’d ask for it more if it didn’t mess up his hair so much before meetings. He’s always got this smug look on his face when he teasingly asks though, so that’s a thing. Also possessive.

!! BONUS !!

Zack Fair – He’s got this lopsided grin on his face when you first ask him because he’s never had someone ask. But after the first time, he’s almost like a puppy.

Genesis Rhapsodos – He does like it, but he saves that sort of intimacy for after…‘The act’. Makes it more special. I think he’s just dramatic, honestly.

Angeal Hewley – Apprehensionnn, but if he’s feeling particularly stressed he may let you do it. It’s a hard sell though, be strong soldier.

Sephiroth – YES, thoroughly enjoys someone playing in his hair but understands they could be there for a while given the length of his luxurious locks – not that he minds. He could sit there all day, grinning and praising you for your time and effort. Unnecessarily suave, always.

——————————

Pictures aren’t mine, Headcannons are!

#final fantasy vii #final fantasy 7 #ff7 remake #cloud strife #tifa lockhart #aerith gainsborough #cid highwind #vincent valentine #ff7 crisis core #reno of the turks #reno sinclair #rude ff7 #tseng of the turks #rufus shinra #angeal hewley #genesis rhapsodos #sephiroth #zack fair

157 notes · View notes

c0smoshit · 11 months

Text

Cuddling with ffvii boys!!

⋆ ࣪. ℂ𝕙𝕒𝕣𝕒𝕔𝕥𝕖𝕣𝕤 ≫ Cloud Strife, Zack Fair, Sephiroth and Angeal Hewley

⋆ ࣪. 𝕎𝕒𝕣𝕟𝕚𝕟𝕘𝕤 ≫ fluff, fluff and more fluff, not proofread!

⋆ ࣪. 𝔸/ℕ ≫ enjoy!! :))

Cloud

★ Obviously he had to be the first one I'll be talking about

★ Yeahh... If you want to actually touch this guy without him freaking out, you'll have to wait for him to finally give in to his desires

★ Once he's warmed up, may god save you from his wreckingly long cuddling sessions ( poor baby he's so so so touch starved )

★ He doesn't care about the position, he just wants you close, really close to him ( paying off for all the times he has dreamt about you in his arms )

★ Will probably fall asleep very soon once he's got you trapped

"Feeling better?"

A low grumble of approval made your belly vibrate. His head was laying down on your stomach as you were sat on the headboard of the bed, your legs placed by his sides as he had his arms hugging your middle part.

He hugged you as if you were about to leave the room ( which was indeed, not happening ). His eyes were closed and his breathing was serene too, taking the chance to play with his hair meanwhile.

You were both winding down from the day, his hair still a bit damp from the shower he had just taken. And god did he look cute all sleepy on your belly.

You smiled, enjoying one of the very few moments Cloud would let you see his soft side.

Zack

★ My baby 🤧

★ Where do I even start, well, should we be asking him?

★ Because the moment your arms would welcome him in a maze of softness and care, this boy would be down bad

★ Automatically would have you trapped bellow him or viceversa, he likes physical touch maybe a bit too much

★ Is also one of the very few moments where you can actually hear silence again besides him, just the sound of his breathing mixed with yours

"Zack! I'm hom-"

Not even 5 seconds after you had shouted that into what you thought was your empty living room, he was already hoisting you up in the air by your waist like the puppy that was waiting for his owner he was.

. . .

"I missed you"

"I know, I know"

You tried to shush him, but it was quite a dificult task since he had his whole body on top of you on the sofa. His arms embracing your back, almost as if he didn't care about the cramps he knew he would get, he just cared about you.

He looked at you over where his head was laying on your chest, pointing out how pretty you looked when you smiled. God he is such a dork.

Sephiroth

★ Okay so this guy is... big

★ Not a fan of hugs but god, he lives off your arms wrapped around him

★ He would carry you bride style even when you both are cuddling on the bed. Keeping you close to him by your back and knees

★ You should be proud because this guy... this guy isn't really a big fan of having company nor physical touch with them

★ Once he is alone with you, he is a whole different man

Silence fell over your cute and tidied up room, Sephiroth's best music to listen to.

Your cheek met his collarbone, he was sat on your headboard as he kept you close to him with both of his arms. One by the back of your knees and the other on your back.

His heartbeat made you almost fall asleep by it's lulling trap, and you were sure you wouldn't last any longer either way.

Quiet nights like this before sleep were your absolute favourite and you could tell by the way he spoke to you with such honey bathed words that he enjoyed quite as good as you.

Angeal

★ GOD

★ He loves, loves, loves holding you

★ Anywhere and whenever, his arms would be around you. You're just too sweet not to be held, he thinks

★ But he also loves having your soft hands caressing his skin too, whenever you would let him lay his head down on your thighs as you caressed his forehead and hair.

★ He just loves keeping u close ;)

"G'mornin love"

Your mumbled out response was enough for his heart to melt over your weary eyes and softened voice.

Your arms were curled up in his chest, his strenght not failing him as he kept you close even when he was asleep. He wishes he could stay like this with you forever.

Curled up in his arms as the sun bathed your pretty face, the soft whines you would let as he tried to get you off the bed.

Bonus!!

His hands felt cold at first against your belly, but soon a scorching warmth would start to envelop your guts.

His breathing was serene against your nape, your back against his front. Almost poetically implying that you trusted him, that you cared about him.

No matter how deeply he would have fallen asleep, he still would and will keep you as secure and close to his body. Under the warm covers of your bed, everything felt nicer anyways.

So when you felt his characteristic blonde locks trickling your neck, you felt at home.

315 notes · View notes

jtgunner · 2 months

Text

youtube

What's up? I'm now live with my birthday livestream of Final Fantasy VII Rebirth for the PS5 on YouTube! I really liked Remake, so let's see how Rebirth holds up! Come hang out!

WATCH IT HERE: https://youtube.com/live/ZpbL9-ZlG2s

4 notes · View notes

ariseur · 5 months

Note

id like to request a zack fair x reader... they're college roomates and zacks a total flirt and while reader denies it for funsies, after a really bad date with some frat boy, zack comforts her and she changes her mind?

micellar water 𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪

zack fair (ffvii) x fem!reader

┊ ˚➶ notes ｡˚ 🎼

hii!! i didnt really specify that they were in college or who it was that reader had a bad date with, this is kinda in zack’s pov and him just being super whipped for you!! this is probably like the longest fic i’ve made so far soo.. i hope you guys enjoy lol

┊ ˚➶ warnings ｡˚ 🎼

mentions of crying, mentions of kissing (eww!! cooties!!), zack’s just super sweet but also super goofy— like he’s the dude to say ‘scruba dub dub’ in the shower type goofy, him waiting for reader and utterly being the ultimate retriever bf (or more so friends to lovers in this), lmk if i missed anything 💕

┊ ˚➶ word count ｡˚ 🎼

1789 words, 9782 characters

. ˚◞♡ ⃗ *ೃ༄ . ˚◞♡ ⃗ *ೃ༄ . ˚◞♡ ⃗ *ೃ༄ . ˚◞♡ ⃗ *ೃ༄

“woah, you look hot—!” you scoffed, hearing the grin in zack’s voice from behind you while he sat on the couch. you looked at yourself in the mirror, seeing how the sleek dress hugged your figure as you fixed your hair, curves shown on display.

you snickered as you watched zack stare at you, feigning awe with his jaw dropped low and a hand hovering over his mouth. “yeah, yeah. save it for later, i got somewhere to be.” you tsk’ed as your eyes flickered around the living room, searching for your shoes. walking down the hall, you shouted, “did you hide my shoes again, zack?”

a beat of silence passes before you zack’s guilty voice traveled from the living room into the hallway, “maybe.”

zack pouted as you made your way back, huffing as you spotted your pumps placed not-so-subtle-y under his sword. “maybe i just don’t want you going out with another asshole again.”

“he wasn’t that much of an asshole—“

“he smelled like it—“

with the glare you gave him, zack decided to shut up seeing the heel protectively clutched in your hand. sure, you went out with a lot of shitty guys, zack thought. but it was nothing you couldn’t ever handle before.

your face quickly shifted to a sly grin, standing upright as you primped once again, perfecting your look. “why, you jealous, zack?”

“no, just being the cool ultimate amazing friend that i always am.” he stated it so matter of fact like— when really, the word “friend” left his tongue rather thickly, the word almost dying at the back of his throat. he’d never tell you, he thought. he didn’t want to ruin what you both had with some stupid feelings of his own.

you let out an unconvincing, “sure, sure.”

zack surfed through the channels on the tv, sprawled out on the couch as he still felt his legs burn from the amount of squats he had done after training. he pressed his lips disappointedly at how the tv lacked any good shows before he heard you yelp, “shit! it’s eight—!”

tilting his head at your clambering, he sat there in bemusement as he watched you run out the door— until your head popped in one last time, “food, fridge, i’ll be back before midnight!”

but as the door shut in a hurry, zack leaned his head back against the arm of the sofa. the apartment was silent except for the low crackling volume of whatever crappy show played on tv. his chest rose and fell as he let out a big sigh, slumping against the couch as his eyes drifted towards the wall.

great, he was alone and his unceremonious attempts at hiding your shoes failed. he almost felt dissatisfied, why couldn’t you just see that he liked you? or better yet, why couldn’t he just admit he liked you so you could reject him and get over it? zack wore his heart on his sleeve, so why was it so difficult now?

one hour turned into two, and two into three. it took everything for zack just to keep himself occupied. he moved around the apartment restlessly— doing squats, watching shit tv, even trying so far as to try making a new dish. keyword: try.

after a whole day of pretty much doing nothing waiting for you to come home, he decided to just tire himself out enough to pass out on the couch, sleep being his last resort. he lolled his head on the arm of the couch, resting it in the dent left from the hours before. zack took one last look at the clock as it read eleven o’clock. letting out a sigh, he closed his eyes while shifting on the small sofa trying to get comfortable. nothing much better to do when waiting then take a nap to speed up the process, yeah?

but when zack jolted awake at the sound of the door slamming, he sat upright while his eyes searched the room. not even having time to rub the sleep from his eyes, he looked around.

now dark with only the tv as his light source, the clock on the wall now read twelve o’five and your heels were now carelessly thrown against the door. zack turned his head towards the new source of light and was met with the bright luminescent rays of the bathroom accompanied with your silhouette in the doorway. and at first glance, zack would’ve brushed it off as you just being lazy— but his thoughts changed when he heard the wet sniffles and broken sighs, his ears perked up.

his back hit the cold air once he got up, leaving the warmth of the couch and making his way over to the lit bathroom. mako tinted eyes adjusted to the light as they settled on your blurry figure, hunched over the sink with eyeliner smudged across your eye while you tried to catch your breath— and that woke him up real quick.

“zack—!” you said, and god, did your shaky voice make his heart ache. his body reacted on its own accord, arms immediately reaching out towards you and embracing you. zack put one hand on the back of your head as your body shook with silent sobs. he could feel the tears starting to stain his shirt, one of his favorites although that didn’t seem to matter now that he didn’t mind it being coated with your sorrow.

he heard a small voice next to his ear, wavering as you tried maintain your composure as you said, “i’m sorry i woke you up.” with a comforting hand on his back, you rubbed at the trail of his spine, unknowing that zack’s eyebrows were knit together with a strong bewilderment— you’re over here crying, and you’re apologizing over waking him up?

“don’t say that.” he told you, and you could’ve sworn his arms locked around you tighter. trying to lighten the mood, he gives a weary chuckle, “i needed to wake up anyways.”

you didn’t laugh though, simply soaking in the affection brought upon you until he finally pulled away. the hand that kept you at arms length squeezed your shoulder while you sniffled and wiped under your eyes. “‘m glad i wore waterproof mascara, today.”

his lips twitched downwards, watching as you made a weak attempt to brush his concern off. “what happened tonight?”

and that seemed to make you cry even harder, making zack curse himself as his eyes widened. “okay—! okay! don’t answer—don’t answer that!” he stammered, trying in a desperate attempt to get you to stop crying. he didn’t know why he’d even ask that to a person who was currently sobbing and probably needed space?

“here, just..”

a loud yelp left your lips once you felt zack’s hands lift you up from the underside of your thighs and place you on the bathroom counter, the cold ceramic a deep contrast against the warmth of your skin.

you let yourself settle as you watched zack rummage through the wooden drawers of the sink, grumbling something along the lines of, “where’s that stupid water..?”

you cleared your throat, “what water?”

“the stupid water you use when you have the waterproof thingy on.”

“..micellar water?”

“yes! that—!” he pointed his finger at you in agreement, watching as you leaned over and opened the first drawer and pointed out the small clear tub of the product. he looked around in search of something— before letting out a small, “aha!” sound once he found a small towel. you softly grinned as you watched him douse the rag in a copious amount of

makeup remover, not even bothering to wring it out before turning towards you with a triumphant grin.

you closed your eyes, relishing in the feeling of his calloused hands— gentle under your chin while the other one wiped the makeup off your face. he made sure to softly pat your eyes, making sure to try and rid all the mascara off your lashes as best as he could without being too rough.

“y’see? i told you i was the coolest awesomest friend ever, didn’t i?” zack finally said. even with his teasing grin, his tone remained uncharacteristically soft.

“‘cool ultimate amazing friend’.” you corrected him, the corners of your lips quirking upwards while you talked. zack was lucky you couldn’t see his smile right now, just happy to admire yours in the dim white lighting of the bathroom. “right.” he said, nodding his head as if you could see him now.

he set the towel down as he examined your eyes, making sure he got all the makeup off. fluttering your eyes open, you gazed back at zack. in any other scenario, he would’ve brushed his staring off and used the makeup as an excuse— but really, even with your puffy eyes and swollen lips, and even in the cheap apartment complex lighting, he’d still think you’re beautiful. maybe the dingy details of the bathroom and the close proximity made it more intimate than needed.

leaning forward, your eyes flickered between his lips and his eyes, ensuring that he wanted the same thing as you. and when he had met you in the middle, bridging the gap between your parted lips with his own, it’s like a wave of coolness washed over his body. your hands came up to rest upon his jaw while he thought to himself; this was all he ever wanted, his dream girl right in front of him let alone kissing him.

sighing, you pulled away for a moment— hands still rested on his face. his eyes held nothing but adoration for you when he gazed up at you, the small height difference causing his eyes to look even more ethereal in the light, swirls of mako and the overhead bulbs evident in his dazed eyes. he only chased your lips for a split second before you let out a small laugh and a sniffle. he wasn’t just a ‘rebound’, you thought to yourself, zack fair was a man worth much, much more.

he closed his eyes and leaned in for one more kiss, hand on the back of your head as it buried itself in your hair, but not before mumbling against your lips a quick, “am i still the most ultimate awesomest friend ever?”

you grinned, “do you wanna be?”

“you’re over here sat on the counter kissing your ‘cool ultimate friend’—“

“‘cool ultimate amazing friend’—“

zack pouted, tilting his head before you leaned in for another kiss, removing the dramatic curve of his lips. you groaned in exasperation once he pulled away again, he was just teasing at this point, wasn’t he?—

“i think cool ultimate amazing boyfriend sounds better.” he grinned cheekily.

96 notes · View notes