#What could all of this mean...? 🤔
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Anime only watchers and people who aren't caught up with the Manga, BEWARE... Cuz I'm about to discuss Spy X Family Short Mission 11... You have been warned...! 👌
[SPOILERS AHEAD FROM THIS POINT ON]
Today's chapter may have been a Short Mission + a Special Illustration, but it may have given us some interesting tidbits to think on...! 🤔 So let's talk about it, shall we?
First up, let's discuss the Special Illustration:
🥲 Why, Endo...? WHY ARE YOU HURTING ME LIKE THIS...!?!? 💔😭💔
The Special Illustration is of Anya looking at the front door of the orphanage that she was left at and it really has this very melancholic feel to it... 😞 In fact...
This may be the saddest Special Illustration we've ever had in the series thus far... 😢
It makes me wonder if we're going to be getting more information on Anya's past soon...? 🤔
Now let's talk about the Short Mission...!! 👍
It starts by letting us know that it takes place when Anya was first going into Eden Academy...! 👀 This is somewhat of a first because the Short Missions usually don't state when they take place, but, there are some that can you clearly tell where they are supposed to be placed in the story...! 😁
Then, we learn that this how and when Anya gets her name plate for her bedroom door...!!
It makes sense that Anya would want a door plate because she saw it in a cartoon!! 😄
And when she gets it, this is how she carves her into it:
Which is not only how it was written in the early chapters...: (As seen here in Mission 10:)
But... It's also how Anya's name was originally spelled in the first translation of the manga...! 😲
Some time after, Twilight brings up the misspelling of her name:
AND THIS IS HER REACTION:
Then, we see that the name plate was changed to "Anya"...:
And finally, we end this Short Mission in Anya's room laying on her bed like this...:
WHY DOES THE END OF THIS SHORT MISSION FEEL REALLY SAD TO ME...!?!? 💔😭💔
Is "Anya" not her really name...? What does all of this mean...!? 😫
And that was Short Mission 11... Usually, Short Missions are just fun mini adventures, but this one (and it's Special Illustration) have a very melancholic feel to me... 😓 And like I said earlier, this could potentially have something to do with Anya's past, maybe in the near future...? 👀
Anyway, this was a very interesting Short Mission that I'm curious to see if it'll play a part into the overall story at all...!! 😄 So until the next Mission... Take care, be safe out there, be kind to one another...!! Later!! 🤗
P.S.: I didn't get around to doing a review for episode 33 of the anime because I was extremely tired yesterday... 😩 Hopefully, I'll get around to writing it today...!! 😊
#spy x family#sxf#spyxfamily#spy x family manga#sxf manga#spyxfamily manga#anya forger#yor forger#loid forger#Short Mission 11#What could all of this mean...? 🤔#Are we gonna get a Anya related Arc soon...? 🤔#manga spoilers
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Columbo and the Knight (1984)
put me in the universe where Columbo ran through the 1980s and had a crossover episode with Knight Rider. I think they deserved it, and I am not just saying that because they're my two favorite Old Shows. @telebeast wrote a little fanfic blurb about it and I HAD to visualize it into a comic (which is also the longest comic I have finished thus far at five pages...), so writing credit goes to them.
Autism W!
#columbo#knight rider#art#michael knight#kitt#comic#highlight reel#crossover#telebeast#there are two small easter eggs here. can you find them. they were somehow not Entirely lost when i resized these for the public#this is what i mean when i say I Draw And It's Everyone Else's Problem. look at my INCREDIBLY niche crossover comic boy#if the knight rider fandom has like 12 people in it. how many of y'all have seen columbo#this comic is for like 4 people and me and phoenix are already two of them#niche is my specialty lets be real. weird niche obscure shit and ships nobody's paid attention to yet#not to suggest this is ship art. columbo has his wife and michael has his car lmfao#stylizing real people is EXTREMELY hard btw sorry for when they get off model. its partly a 'better imperfect than never finished' situatio#cant tell you how much i redrew some of these panels. weeps#this took me 2 weeks but i think i thumbnailed it all in may and the ideas been rollin around in my head since march#is anybody good at editing. please edit michael and columbo into an image together like its a screenshot. NOT generated. edited.#it would be so cool#ive drawn columbo a lot but i haven't drawn a lot of michaels. i was learning things about his outfit AS I WAS DOING THE DAMN#COLORS ON THIS. all the lines done. it was too late to change anything. i did all the lines and colored page by page#i realized my mistakes on like page 3. 1 and 2 were already done. it was Too Late.#imagine it though. them working a case together. switching between the more serious tone of columbo vs the goofier#action antics of michael and kitt. columbo being so impressed by Modern Technology. there's more i could say but phoenix may write#more of this crossover and i don't want to spoil it :'3#there's opportunity here though i swear. there's gold to be dug.#i like how kitt gets shading but columbo's junker peugeot doesn't. kitt looked wrong without any. columbo's car is matte and dirty#i also applied effects to this to make it look a little film-grainy and VHS like. some CRT TV vibes#the only question left is. did they put knight rider into columbo; or columbo into knight rider 🤔
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honestly um ,. one part of me understands why those posts were made but, are these poser incest enthusiasts in the room with us now
#jcdrgcy#like where do you get these people from and are you sure they're real and it's not a misunderstanding#i do think it still doesn't get you clout and just because now a community exists in a form it didn't 3-4 years ago*‚ this doesn't make it#mainstream ahaha#*: this is just according to my observations like i'm sure there were communities at all times on the internet‚ somewhere‚#of various sizes‚ many different ones of them‚ i meant the circle of 20smth mutuals we have now which isn't a circle because some bloggers#are just tangentially related or just in one fandom and it's debatable if it could even be called a community#i just know i didn't have so many friends who agreed with me and accepted me a few years ago and now a lot of us interact regularly#but i don't see how.. dead dove or grooming or necro or even the genuinely gothic or tragic would be. becoming cooler?#🤔#idk enlighten me about what all of this means if you can and you want to#kata.txt
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For the FFXIV ask thingy: 8, 14 & 20~
Ohh nice, a triple~
8. Biggest Accomplishment?
This is a hard one since I don't do any savages or extremes or any of the "hard" endgame content people usually say as their big accomplisments haha. So I guess uhh, idk, getting all jobs to 90 during EW? (six to go till all jobs at 100) Or that 5000th commendation I got last month? Figuring out how to do old content (and maps) with just the 3 of us? Still playing this game after 5 years?
14. Favorite Raid?
Alliance one? One of the Nier raids, probably Copied. Ridorana, Orbonne and Aglaia are good too, but there's just something that sparks joy whenever I see Nier raids come up in roulette.
8-man ones? Uhhh..... Pandae 9 (Kokytos) or 11 (Themis)? P4 (Hesperos), 6 (Hegemone) and 7 (tree) were nice too, and I kinda still like getting Eden Titan on rouls.
20. Favorite Limit Break?
Hmm, summoner one is very neat! Not that you get to use it that often, but it's fun to finally become Bahamut.
Fav tank one is drk, melee on is ninja (*angrily does really fast hand signs at you*), ranged is bard (its the bow at the end) and healer is whm. Almost all of them are good tho, only ones I'm meh about are the more "boring", non flashy ones (pld, mnk, sam)
#for someone who logs in almost daily for the past 5 years i'm very much a casual#so all “big things” are really mundane eheh#5k comms was pretty good i think#i haven't been waiting for them after dungeons since that last mount at 1.5k#but some people have fast fingers lol#one could say “having a house”#but that was back when there were tons of them still around light#like you'd go to any non-odin or phoenix server and there'd be smalls sitting in almost every ward at min price#also... as i'm writing this i'm having this weird realization that almost every raid i like is one that is fun to play as blm#what could it mean? 🤔 /s#no seriously i just like raids with fun music neat mechs and spots that let you dodge with minimal movement so you look really cool ahahaha#honestly brd lb is close second#as is blm lb#and i do enjoy a good ver-flashbang#anyway! thanks for the ask#answered ask
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hiii!!!!! for the hc ask game: 🧸 A headcanon about their childhood for muu, and maybe 💔 An angsty headcanon for any prisoner (or prisoners) of your choice? your writing is AMAZING btw, i really adore it
AH thank you so much!! I'm glad you're enjoying :D These were interesting ones to think about, ty! The ideas themselves are simple, I'm just long-winded, sorry 😭
🧸I like to think that Muu was just as shy/unwilling to leave her comfort zone as a kid, despite doing a lot of activities with her parents. This, combined with her parents giving her whatever dolls she asked for, results in her clinging to those for support. She has names and personalities for dozens of dolls, and talks to them all the time. She has one in particular she carries around everywhere she goes when she gets scared. The habit lasts a bit into her older years, but she's so downright cute that it only ever earns her doting instead of scolding.
💔 Immediately following the T2 attacks, I feel like Mahiru’s condition is bad enough that Shidou warna everyone there's a high chance she won't make it through the night. There's a solemn, grieving silence as everyone prepares themselves for another death. Shidou is wracked with guilt because he doesn't know if he can save her. Fuuta is dealing with his own injuries, but he and Amane get a kind of survivor's guilt that it could have easily been them on their deathbed. (And now with canon support) Kotoko didn't mean to kill anyone, just rough them up, so she's haunted by guilt/panic that she tries to cover up with a brave face. Kazui takes it the hardest, nearly breaking down in his cell because he blames himself for not getting to her in time.
#milgram#muu kusunoki#mahiru shiina#shidou kirisaki#kazui mukuhara#kotoko yuzuhira#fuuta kajiyama#amane momose#i know muu mentions having a lot of friends in her interrogation questions but this still stands to me#she would still need to face a lot on her own (surrounded by only adults)#so she could still get very attached to her dolls#i cant decide of shes a stuffed animal girl#or the type to have a little girl doll who she does her hair and gets matching outfits and all that#you all decide and tell me what you think 🤔#and yeah i think especially if kazui was a cop hed take it really hard that he didn't protect mahiru#im pretty sure kotoko has specifically said she has the intent to kill 🙃 but for now i like to think she wasnt going for all that#i need deep cover to come out so i can finally get into her head for t2...#gonna be traveling/visiting family tomorrow into next week :]#i hope it means more writing time but who knows with my family adfgvhh#im almost done with my next request (amane my beloved :'))#and then i want to do the purge march section for 'lights camera sing your sins' hehe#thats enough rambling rip -- goodnight 🌙👍#but thank you sm for the request!! it was so fun to think about >:3#headcanon time milgram
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[just venting a bit into the void you understand you understand 😌] Lately I've been feeling very caught between "I have a lot of thoughts on Sparrow and Normal and all that with the ending and teen talk and feel like I need to get them out and voice them for my own piece of mind and resolution" and "I am lacking the strength and energy to actually sit down and write it all out and kind of really just want to fully move on to other things (AUs, fics, anything else)" but my brain can't seem to commit to either and that's quite frustrating cause it's just left me very restless. *Sigh*. Idk! Just needed to complain about that a bit ig, it's silly but this is what has been ailing me as of late.
#Then there's also a part of me that's like “does anyone even care at this point? haven't I already talked about them too much?”#but I have seen many a take that irk me...#and perhaps at the center of it all nagging at me is that persistent conflation of love and pride#Less about that in Normal's mind so much as in Will's and the fandom's 🤔#Also that reoccurring issue of the fandom going ''Normal thinks this therefore it is The Truth'' though I believe I've discussed this befor#And... Hooks Will could have grabbed onto but didn't... Quite a few of those...#And the double standard/negativity bias in fandom of ignoring that Sparrow says both that he loves and likes Normal while doodlerized#But not treating those with the same legitimacy we do the pride thing. And ignoring Sparrow's demonstrations of love and change...#And what the love wolf scene actually implies about Sparrow (as I see it) with his own explanation of the pride thing in mind#But also!!! Also on Norm's epilogue and how despite everything taken at face value (i.e. no teen talk influence) I don't actually hate it#and I think it's plenty salvageable#And gah also that like *regardless* of how things turn out with Normal and his dad-#Well I haven't listened to much of the teen talk just the directly Sparrow-relevant clips#so I don't know quite how cynical Will is or isn't about Normal's future#But like. UGH. What I'm trying to say is even if things didn't find resolution vis-a-vis his dad#(which tbh I could go either way on- it's the meta misinterpretations of Sparrow that Bother me not so much Normal's)#(Well that's complicated. Again it comes back to the love vs. pride thing gosh this is so vague of me lol)#With all the positive influences in his life (and just the fact that life is long? and therapy is a thing?) I just don't see Normal-#being Miserable for the rest of his life. Like. I mean I won't elaborate here really but damn it no he can absolutely turn out alright stil#blugh#BUT YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN THAT'S A LOT OF STUFF AND THAT'S ONLY VAGUE RAMBLINGS ABOUT *SOME* OF IT#Like I'm proud of a lot of my essay posts (which I'm hoping to eventually compile in a masterpost eventually actually) but they take a whil#And if my heart wants to do other things... Ah idk...#ANYWAYS a vent to vent a vent to vent
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Don't know whether it's a product of my upbringing or just part of who I am, but I really do tend to shrug off things that seem to send others into massive guilt spirals. Like, what's the point? Either you meant to do it or you didn't. If you meant to do it but regret it now, make what amends you can & resolve to do better, then move on. If you didn't mean to, be honest about it, apologize if need be, & try to do better. Then move on.
Beating yourself up truly serves no purpose. What are we, catholic? If there is a god, I truly don't think they'd care, anyways
#speculation nation#religion might have some part in it. i was taught a flavor of christianity that portrayed god as loving above all else.#portrayed god as *forgiving*. thats the point of jesus dying on the cross? forgiving your sins?#i was taught that so long as you tried to do good and believed in god then you would go to heaven.#none of that internalized guilt shit. it really serves no purpose.#this could potentially stem from prior abuse too. in which case. well. i hope people can break out of those patterns of thought. sincerely.#i have a history with abuse but idk ive run under a 'fuck those people' mentality. why should i run by the way they treated me?? genuinely.#no one person is singularly horrible and irredeemable. no not even you.#youre your harshest critic. you have front row seats to all ur nasty thoughts. things that most people dont say out loud.#everyone has nasty thoughts though. some more than others. but what matters is what you *do*. not what you think.#no one is gonna know any mean or awful thoughts you have if you dont tell them. thought crimes arent real. what matters is what you *do*.#and even for the things you do wrong. everyone makes mistakes. just work to do better next time.#genuinely makes me so sad to see polls asking about ppl's self perceptions & seeing majority of ppl so down on themselves.#like come on. i used to think i was an awful person bc i knew all the mean and kind of manipulative things id think.#but eventually i recognized that no one is perfect and everyone has ugly thoughts. just do your best to do good & learn from your mistakes.#if you do that much then youre a well-meaning human being. not perfect but no one is. that should be enough.#maybe if i exhibit enough of my 'idgaf' attitude about this kind of thing i can influence some other ppl with it as well. 🤔🤔 hmmm
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WE USED TO BE MUTUALS BEFORE I STOPED USING MY ACCOUNT AND MADE A NEW ONE! I CAN'T BELIEVE I FOUND YOU IN THE WILD! MY FRIEND!
😄 WELCOME HOME MY LOVE! ♥️🩷
🤔 I hope I haven’t changed too much since your departure, clearly you recognized you so that should be enough 😄 I still haven’t changed my url which is nice but anyhow I’m glad you’re home. Maybe a tad bit late but hopping around the dashboard like a frog trying to cross the road must be exhausting so I made you dinner
🍺🍷🍸🍹🥂🥃☕️🍵🥤🥛🧃🧋
🍗🍔🌭🌮🌯🫔🥙🥗🥪🍕🍟🍖🥓🍜🍝🍣🍙🍚🥟🫕🍲🍛🧆🥘
And here’s some desert ♥️🩷
🎂🍪🍩🧁🍦🥧🍮🍬🍡🍭🍫
#😄 no seriously hello hi!! I find it so funny that you remember me from long forgotten times#I don’t think I’ve strayed by my overal demeanor to much 🥺 so it means a lot you even looked at me and said ‘I know her!!’#😄 I hope the new blog is much cozier than the last#also I am NOT surprised you found me out in the wild 🗣️ if there’s one thing I’m good for it’s yapping on the internet#my boop day posts got a lil further than my usual ones 😄 the first especially I saw a lot#of people were confused like me on how to boop and went OH when I figured it out so I wanted to help others and it took off LITTLE DID#I KNOW THAT THERE WAS ALSO EVIL AND SUPER BOOPS#also 🤔 I wasn’t sure what food you liked so all the food emojis I could click#welcome back 😄♥️🩷#mys mail 💌
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[161] hermit redesigns 18/26: Stress!
I'm really happy with this one! She's very smoll :]
Smoll fairy lady!
Oldddddd ddddddesign!
#daily doodles#hermitcraft#stress#redesigning all the hermits#redesign#i love the golden design on the wings!#she also uses a lot of potions#i wonder what that could mean... 🤔#also the poofy shoulder thingies! i love them! :]#And the shorts are also very cool#they're the very poofy ones that look like a skirt!
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one of my many many many arr*w related grievances is that people in the fandom (including in the laurel lance sub fandom) are very hesitant or even outright refuse to admit that quentin lance was an extremely emotionally abusive father. i still don't understand why that is.
#the thing is it's not like you have to go deep to see the abuse#it's actually quite in your face literally from day one which is why i'm forever raising an eyebrow at all the praise he gets#he was an extremely emotionally explosive man who constantly verbally or emotionally abused and manipulated laurel#he shredded her self esteem and confidence#he kept her shackled to him out of selfishness and made her small so he could continue to control her#and eventually he was the direct cause of her violent death#like what's not clicking?#he's john winchester* and yet for whatever reason he still doesn't get the john winchester treatment and i'll never understand why#is it because he more openly loved his children? because abusers often love their victims. it doesn't change the abuse#this rant coming to you because i'm trying to shift back into htlgi mode for the new year so i can at least try to get something posted soo#and i know i've talked about how i'm going to be tackling laurel's mommy issues but with the mommy issues come the inevitable daddy issues#and something i'm currently struggling with is that i....don't think laurel will ever be able to save herself from that man#especially not htlgi laurel#she is simply not capable of removing herself from that cycle of abuse. not where she is right now. maybe not ever.#which means 🤔#what if - and i'm just spitballing here - i kill him off?#........����#oh that does sound satisfying ngl#it's not like i've given him much else to do#he mostly pops up every now and then to trigger both dean's fight or flight daddy issues and his overprotective husband issues#hmmm#anti quentin lance#arrow discourse#(*my hot take is that i think quentin lance is worse than john winchester. disclaimer: yes i'm aware that's an unpopular opinion.#i'm also aware it's ~cringe~ to be arrow posting in 2023 almost 2024 but this is how long it takes me to write lol)
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Against my own will, I haven't seen the afternoon in a week
#I CANT KICK THIS JET LAG AUGSHSKDBX#it was so easy adjusting when i was at the philippines like two days max i was already good#HERE THO??? I AM A SLEEPY GIRL#once the clock strikes 2 PM i blink and suddenly im all swaddled up in bed and its fucking 10 PM AAJSJDHDJ#i wont lie i only like it bc that means i get to see sunrises 🤭🤭🤭#BUT I CANST STAY LIKE THIS#EVERYONE ELSE HAS ADJUSTED LIKE NORMAL AND IM OVER HERE BEING A NIGHT OWL LOL#im gonna try to draw tonight ehehehe might as well#the only thing about being the only one up at night is im trying to vibe downstairs by myself right??#and its a vibe dont get me wrong#however i am what the young people call extremely paranoid#so i carry an emotional support knife around as i watch my silly modern families and scroll and tikkytok#if i at least had my 3 big akitas with me id feel a little bit less ummmm like i need to be on guard#but they go up to bed with my parents every night 😞😞🥲#i tried drawing last night and i doodled a genya but that was all i could muster :(#so maybe DS isnt the best thing for my art block right now 🤔🤔#but idk if im feeling SDV 😩#once i fall for 2 ✌️ sibling-like characters that would die for each other and are like a gold mine for angst i am GONE from everything else#its funny cause ive liked DS for about 3 years but when i first got into it i just COULD NOT get into making fanart#and even tho i loved the charas i was like nahhh none of them are hiting the right chord for me to full on hyperfixate and build my own aus#but i got back into it a bit ago cause i was like alright if the world insists i read the manga thru for the 4th time WHO AM I TO SAY NO LOL#AND SUDDENLY THE SHINAZUGAWAS CAPTURED MY HEART AND THEYVE BEEN ON MY MIND EVER SINCE#HOW COULD I HAVE BEEN SO BLIND TILL MY 4TH REREAD#🤔🤔 hmm maybe its cause we finally got to see genya in action with the 3rd season#they did him so right bros i LOVE HIM HE IS MY SON#anyways thats all for now#gonna go get comfy and make my nest on the couch to try to draw again >:)
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so in regards to the bat charm, esp in the hella awesome banquet mv!!!!
the tag itself is called ofuda, a protective talisman!!! there are many different types of ofuda (omikuji are also classified as a kind of ofuda for instance) and throughout the hella awesome banquet mv, we do see the bat charm used as said various types!!!!
here in these two shots, we see the bat charm used as a senjafuda!!! senjafuda are these talismans with personalised designs that, once upon a time ago in japan, were passed around in secret councils like trading cards. ofuda typically have a deity written on it to call for luck, wealth, health, whatever said deity presides over. senjafuda, however, tend to have the person’s name on it and when people would go on pilgrimages, they’d stick the senjafuda on temple shrine gates like a very decorative ‘we were here’ tag lol
fits with the journey to hell narrative that seems to be happening in the mv!!!
and this type of ofuda is known as fuin no ofuda!!!! this one is used as a type of seal to keep evil, vengeful spirits enclosed and away from humans. the more powerful the spirit, the more seals are required to contain in the enclosed space. it’s already a little worrisome to see imagery of kuukou getting killed but this puts a evil spirit/vengeful spirit spin on top of it 🤔
#this is vee speaking#and i want to say there’s a traditional buddhist ofuda in a shot with jyushi#where the will o wisps are blazing on the charms behind him#those ofuda are imbued with the spirit and virtues of different buddhas and buddhist deities#but will o wisps are dead spirits lingering so hm 🤔#and lol ofuda (お札) and bank notes in jp are written the same way (お札=osatsu)#so anytime the bat charm was falling on screen was bat making it rain—#i’ve been thinking if kuukou does have progressive memory loss that part in the mv could be a ref to it#it hasn’t REALLY been that long since we’d had kuukou associated with some sort of death imagery when the mv came out#like kuukou had thrown out the name of the tree gautama buddha died under in his cross a line verse lol#but MAN it feels like it’s been a minute since i had to think about it lol#still hoping all these death red flags kuukou waves around like a pro flag bearer don’t mean anything LOL#EDIT: posting as is but even tho this may have been only a hint to kuukou’s ability#i am still concerned WHY it needed to be depicted this way#it could be a red herring kinda thing to throw you off the trail and that might be what i’m hoping for lol#c: kuukou👑#c: jyushi#c: hitoya
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me when a new (god-tier, galaxy-brained, divinely-inspired, etc) fic gets slapped into my merlin-rotted brain:
#me: minding my own business#my brain: hey actually what if it was ygraine that lived instead of uther#it’s literally at 3 pages already JUST THE OUTLINE i literally can’t#what is it about this show that makes me go ‘hmm love it! but what if it was just slightly different 🤔’#mine#anyways itllbe a while before i have time to write or post it#i still have the rest of lesbian arthur to post (and ‘the rest’ is ummhaha. well it’s like 3 fics and several hundred thousand words)#but then i also have a pre-series like backstory that ive been building up#that one i still have to write but the outline and the few scenes i have written are ridiculously long so im expecting it to be a long fic#i would need to write that before this one i think to get a better feel for ygraine as a character#and her relationships with those around her#so much would change without uther tho! like even on a massive scale - no purge means no need for merlin to be so damn powerful right?#no uthers guilt means gorlois never gets sent off to die#and then on top of that like personally all offense i think nimueh was in love with ygraine because i say so#now ygraine is in this position where her closest and slightly homoerotic friend who is indirectly responsible for the death of her husband#and then i also personally hc that ygraine is from europe like one of the frankish kingdoms - just based on de bois#so like. not only is she ruling a VERY NEW kingdom like uther has JUST retaken the throne#this cannot be politically very stable yet. on top of that shes this outsider! i think it could be very interesting indeed#add that to the like. you know ‘when youre a child your mother is your mother. then you grow up and realize that she was a relatively young#woman. with a child’#beloved#brainrot i swear to GOD why do the worms in my brain fixate on this show instead of LITERALLY ANYTHING ELSE#anyways#merlin
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Sai che @mipiacerebbestringertiame
@spettriedemoni
@undiariocheparladime non scrivono mai a @claramente97? Che ne pensi?
Mi dispiace! Non parlo Italiano! 😖👉👈
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Me and my issue with always overcomplicating every character I make smh smh
I mean I think part the issue is that I wouldn't even know how I myself would react in a lotta situations cuz you have to think about the specific person, the environment, how I'm feeling in that moment (emotionally and physically), if other people are around and also the type of response I'm looking for
Like in the moment it's a no brainer for me but if I think about a moment in THEORY then I overthink it
Which also leads to me overthinking every possible interaction and response a character will make like idk how they would act in that situation! Is there some sort of backstory reason that they might have a certain reaction to that thing! Have they thought about this interaction before or are they going in without any preperations for this interaction! Do they think before they speak!! How am I suppose to write a character who doesn't think before they speak while I am literally thinking before they speak
#yeah haha and it's only gotten worse the older I've gotten and I mean if you have any tips for me to NOT do this I'm all ears#I've never been super good at doing this kinda stuff tho regardless#I can somewhat do it if I'm thinking of stuff ''in theory'' but to make anything canonical or set in stone is very difficult#backstory stuff easy tho it's just the present that I tend to have issues with in writing#like what should I just make present stuff into a backstory for me to be able to write it properly? I dunno man I dunno#then that plan doesn't work on characters in other stories tho where I don't have that insight#🤔🤔🤔 well whatever maybe I'll figure it out one day either that or I just need to take smth for my anxiety lol#this is why I like choice games you get to explore every possible decision you could have made and see the results afterwards#don't ask me how many hours I have in Minecraft Story Mode
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#I think most people my age are still figuring out who they are#But for me#There's never been a shred of doubt as to who I am#Only what I'm meant to be doing#It's... Something#Knowing yourself and trying to improve that version of you but not knowing how a career ties in with any of it at all#Just... Thinking out loud 🤔#I guess one could argue that part of discovering yourself is finding a fit career path too#But I don't have any desires or wants or ambitions like that#It's scary#I just want to support the people I love#And a career is the means that'll help me achieve that#Tired#Wish I wanted more for myself tbh#Wonder what that's like
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