#Walls of text

[zarla-s]

[DELTARUNE CHAPTER 3+4 SPOILERS]

Thinking about why I like Tenna, he's fun, but he doesn't grab me like Spamton does, in spite of them both being OTT flashy weirdos who are sad and attention-starved. On the surface they act pretty similar, to the point where I thought of Tenna as Diet Spamton, but the more I think about it they actually have a lot of really big differences between them. They're almost opposites, actually. What I think it comes down to is their greater themes. Tenna, King, and Queen are all about abandonment/neglect. Spamton, in comparison, is all about failure.

Spamton is a persona non grata in Cyber City, no one ever talks about him and the Addisons refuse to if you try and confront them about it. He has a strange and quirky battle, but if you forget to follow up on him later, he's a footnote in the whole chapter. He's a tiny guy in a big world.

Tenna is the absolute ruler of TV Land and the entire reality of it bends to his whims. He's huge, bigger than life, everything revolves around him at all times. Everything has his face, everyone does what he wants under restrictive contracts even if they don't want to. Tenna IS TV World.

You meet Spamton at his lowest point. He's living in the garbage, no one will talk to him, he has no control or power over anything without manipulating them into giving it to him (usually unsuccessfully). A lot of his dialogue implies he's beaten by other people regularly. He's angry and frustrated and desperate, and he knows he needs a patsy to get out because he can't get out himself.

Tenna in comparison is living the high life. Almost everything is showy and glamorous (except the Z room, which is associated with Spamton). He IS the Big Shot Spamton used to be and wants to be again. He can, like Jevil, do anything.

Spamton wants to be BIG, partly for the attention and power but mostly because he wants to get OUT. He wants to LEAVE the Dark World and become real, not just an object in the shadows trapped by how Lightners perceive him. He wants to escape the fantasy world into reality, ascending into what he thinks is Heaven. He's the only boss that seems to want this, rather than validation from Lightners.

Tenna wants a past that's gone, where he felt like he glued a family together and everyone was happy watching him and being with him. He wants attention and validation and love from Lightners again, promises that he's still relevant and useful as an escape from reality. Tenna wants to stay in an eternal fantasy world and expand and enable it.

Spamton feels trapped by the voice on the phone and reaches out to Kris by saying he can't force them to do anything, that he can tell Kris is desperate for freedom just like he is. He asks Kris to do him favors to get him the body that he thinks will let him become real. He gives himself into their hands as the LoadedDisk because he can't do it himself (normally). Spamton treats and talks to Kris like a potential partner/customer to scam.

Tenna actually seems scared of Kris, saying that he did everything that they told him to. Kris was the one giving the orders, not Tenna. Tenna's desperate to bring Kris back to a time when their family was intact and they were happy and he was valuable and needed, and he tries to force Kris into more games to try and keep them there. Tenna treats Kris fearfully, like his boss or a sponsor he needs to please or he'll suffer the consequences.

Spamton started as a failure and needed outside support from the voice to become a success, which eventually exerted total control over his life, driving him right back into the dumpster. When he was about to share the secret of that "success" with Tenna, the voice scared him into running away, abandoning him.

Tenna was always successful. It seems like rather than a parabola of failure-success-failure, he's just in a steady decline. Tenna has complete control over his Dark World but it doesn't matter, he can't actually change reality in the Light World. Tenna is in the process of failing when we meet him - Spamton has already failed.

Spamton is obsessed with money. The absolute core of his being is scamming people and making money, it defines his existence. He will do literally anything for it.

Money doesn't even work in TV Land. Instead you get points that Tenna doles out (completely at his discretion) that are worthless outside of TV Land. Tenna gives away prizes and points as incentives to stay and pay attention to him. He wants attention more than anything else.

Spamton is a member of a group of Darkners, the Addisons, who all look very similar to each other with some small variations. He spent a lot of time with them as loverscoworkers. Another instance of being a little guy in a big group.

Tenna is one of a kind. There's no other being in TV Land anything like him. Nothing even comes close. He's completely unique.

Spamton doesn't want validation from Lightners. What he wants is the power to get out of the Dark World and become real. He has his own entirely self-focused goals that don't involve Lightners or the Dark World at all.

Tenna will do anything for validation from Lightners, they define his entire existence. Without them he feels purposeless. He's desperate to give Kris the world they want and for Kris to tell him he's doing a good job, essentially. In this, Tenna is very much like Queen and King. He begs you repeatedly to say you love him and to never leave him.

This is just funny to me but Spamton mentions Tenna rarely but Tenna talks about Spamton constantly lol. Spamton just lives rent-free in Tenna's head.

When you beat Spamton, Kris has a breakdown about it, presumably because they see a lot of similarities between their situations (unwilling puppets trapped by forces controlling them, usually coming from a phone) and how Spamton in the end couldn't escape his strings.

Kris on the other hand doesn't seem that upset about what happens to Tenna, even if he dies. Maybe Kris just didn't have a chance to, given the Knight jumps you almost immediately, but that kind of connection that Spamton and Kris have just isn't there with Kris and Tenna.

Spamton can understand the voice on the phone. Tenna, Blue Addison, and the Player cannot.

Tenna (and his death) are foretold in the prophecy. Spamton, so far, is not.

Television was a massive success and defined multiple generations, and, while diminished, still plays a massive part of the media landscape. Spam email has always been a nuisance no one likes and has a very low, if any, success rate, even though it's inescapable. Television platforms ads, Spamton IS an ad.

Spamton has connections to a variety of other Darkners, like Queen, Swatch, Jevil, and the Addisons. Tenna, being the complete center of his Dark World, really only has a connection to Spamton. (They do share a connection with Mike but that's a weird case.)

Tenna is very isolated in his world, with only his lackeys around him that he treats rather badly. Spamton in comparison is surrounded by other people constantly but all of them deliberately ignore him, isolating him in a different way.

Thematically, this matches their respective mediums. TV is a self-contained passive entertainment source that's primarily solitary, although it can be shared if others are nearby. The things you see on TV are tightly controlled and structured. The internet in comparison is a massive eternally expanding collaboration of people constantly interacting with each other - by its nature it's inescapably social and uncontrollable.

Spamton was always doomed to fail. In the end all his dreams are shattered and all he can do is give himself to you as an item to try and help you achieve yours. He can come out of the glasses on occasion but his life on his own as far as we know it is over. This tragedy (and presumably the sick irony of gaining control over Spamton as an item when all he wanted was freedom) is what leads to Kris's breakdown.

Tenna nearly dies but recovers (usually) and starts a new life with Mettaton, who appreciates and promises to care for him. When we leave him, Tenna is off to a brand new fresh start to a happier life. It's a hopeful and heartwarming conclusion to his arc.

Tenna is intact. He's lucid and coherent, he speaks clearly, he adds graphical and audio flourishes to his text with no issue. He worries about burn-in and being old, but none of that is present in his Dark World form. He's fine.

Spamton is broken. He glitches and falls apart, he can't speak clearly at all. His bracket words are like uncontrollable tics that obscure things against his will. At times it seems like he's being entirely taken over by other forces that speak through him.

There are a lot of things they have in common too of course. They both do like slapping their faces on everything, including their own branded products, haha. They also both want to be successful, in their own ways. They seemed to really like each other at one point and had a good time together! And despite the vast discrepancy in power between them, they're both very alone in their worlds. They both have abandonment issues, although Tenna's manifests as desperation and clinginess while Spamton's manifests as anger and bitterness. They are both in denial about it though lol.

The key thing that broke them up was the person on the phone scaring Spamton into abandoning Tenna right before he was going to tell him the secret of his "success". It seems rather deliberate on the voice's part... I wonder why they did that? I wonder if Tenna knowing the "secret" would have changed the prophecy...

[taintedsoul-if]

I won't try to mince or sugarcoat my words; I'll just get to the point. Just know this is going to be a long one.

In the past, there was a lot of confusion about the world I am trying to shape in Tainted Souls. Honestly, from a reader's point of view, I found my writing lacking in a lot of areas, and because of that, I was between emotions about whether or not I should just delete my blog and my IF and just go back to lurking. Tainted Souls has been around for 3 years or less, I think. And even though it has been around so long, I am new to this whole choice concept.

Once upon a time, I had a Wattpad account where I would create stories. I lost motivation because my editing skills suck a lot, but there was this published author who would read my story and just, you know, she would push me, and sometimes she'd even tell me to send the chapters I would be putting out so she could edit them. Yes, I have a tendency to give up easily, and yes, my motivation isn't.... ugh.

In my last demo, I did a summarization of basically what happened to the original owner before you, the protagonist, transmigrated into the body. At that time, I just wanted to add a few choices even if those choices didn't do shit for the story. During my break, I got down to thinking a lot... I've always been a lover of Chinese novels' reincarnation, transmigration, plot holes, those things, and usually, I'd meet all these systems that were just so full of life, narcissistic, dense, downright evil you know and I always just had this plot in my head where I just started shaping my mini world. Nothingness is different it's not just a system. For every Chinese novel that I read, the backstory is usually something that is just dealt with immediately. Feeding bits and pieces as one goes along just breaks immersion as far as I'm concerned. And I know that it is hard to focus sometimes, especially when it comes to reading... but if one is going to be reading and cannot even remember basic things about the plot, is that book even worth one's time and energy?

Let me just be honest: I've read hundreds of books and best believe just by looking at the synopsis of book books that I've read in the past, I can remember every single important detail of that book that I read. Whether I enjoyed it or not. Books and I are tight... 😂😂

The back story is important even though it is a wall of text because I feel as though it would be weird to just give one line... example...

***

Before ${he} could act, ${he} was knocked unconscious and thrown into the gates of Ostror.

When ${he} woke, a Gorewing descended upon ${him}. No escape. No mercy. The Original Owner perished in agony, ${his} body left to rot. Three days later, the Prime Minister rushed the funeral, eager to bury his disgrace of a ${son} before rumors could spread.*

***

😤😤

What I do best is write. What I do best is to explain things even if it isn't important to the plot at the moment. Down below, I will add a few screenshots of the unedited backstory of the Original Owner's backstory, and you can all make your decision...

Yes, pronouns are incorrect and there are overused words like Original Owner.

Whatever your choices may be I am already prepared. So, please do not be afraid to give your honest vote opinion. Anyway, thank you for taking the time to vote, and please enjoy your day.

[fayet]

The Kpop Experiment: Musings on Ateez in Cologne

Okay. I think most of you won't care for this, so keep on scrolling for your regularly scheduled posting. This is a very, very, very long wall of text. You've been warned.

Anyway, if you're still here - hi! I decided to write up my musings on my Cologne concert experience, mostly because I was asked to and also to keep a few notes for myself. Here's the disclaimer: I'm a little bit into kpop as part of a sort of sociological research thing. I'm fascinated by Kpop, the structure of the industry, the status of it in the west as a cultural export and part of Korea's soft power, the crossover of fancultures and international ties, the performance aspect of it as a very visual art while at the same time being kind of, well, music, and the status of Kpop artists as a product in a capitalistic society.

I started listening to kpop as a means to connect with a family member who is really into it, and then travelled across South Korea and realised how present kpop is in korean everyday culture, even from what I could see as a stupid tourist. So the spiral began... and here we are. I'm not going to touch on any of that here, but, yk, as a little disclaimer it might not go wrong. I also might have some controversial opinions, so read at your own risk.

TL:DR: I'm not a "real" fan, but I wanted to see a kpop concert and I like Ateez' music. Also they are good looking. And I could get tickets, which is also no mean feat.

As a general side note: the organisation in Cologne was kinda meh. We stood outside the arena for quite a long time, and I felt very sorry for the fans who'd gotten dressed up. A lot of young women wore costumes with skirts or other short clothing items, and a lot of them were very cold. I had seats, so I arrived two hours before the show, but I think others were waiting for a long time and I have no idea how the standing room people fared. It just generally seemed like the organisation could have been better.

I went to the concert for the atmosphere almost as much as I did for the music. And boy was it interesting! Fandom is an interesting thing, and I was very impressed by how creative people were. A lot of people were dressed up to the nines, dressed to fit in with some sort of theme/concept (usually either pirate/bouncy area/IOMT style outfits), but there was so much creativity - a lot of people had clothing styled to show their bias, reconstructed garments, patches and names embroidered onto jean jackets, lots of extravagant cowboy hats, it was really impressive to see. Plus the complicated make-up, hair in all colours of the rainbow, funky shoes and bags, glow-in-the-dark accessoires, people were going all out. There was also a generally friendly atmosphere at least where I was hanging around, people talking to each other, chatting, swapping information that could be useful later on. (Side note: there seems to be a rather large overlap of Ateez-fans and Stray Kids-fans, because a lot of people mentioned they'd be going to the Stray Kids concert to be held this summer).

I've never been to an arena concert, and boy was Lanxess big (and it's not the biggest one around), and packed. I'd always wanted to see the sea of lights from the lightsticks, and it did deliver - it looked fantastic, with the colour patterns and the movement and everything. Do I still think lightsticks are a cash crab? Yeah, I do. Does it look amazing? Absolutely.

Speaking of cash: kpop is a business, and groups tour to make money. I would murder someone to have the numbers behind the recent Ateez tour, how much everything cost, how much stays with the company, how much the members actually get. Seriously, that breakdown would make me weep with joy, I'm so damn curious.

I wager most money comes in via the ticket pricing, but I'd guess the merch sales also bring in a ton of moeny, because people had MERCH. in capital letters. So much merch. The average person I saw had a lightstick, maybe some accessory for it, maybe a t-shirt or a hoodie, some keyrings to their bags, maybe a fan with their fav printed on it, one of these plushies and so on and so on. I checked the prices, and d'uh. I have no idea about the quality of the stuff, but fashion has incredible margins and makes money easily, so they do have that going on for them.

I also nearly had a heart attack when I saw the price of the lightsticks. I'd say the average fan i saw dropped around 150 Euros on Merch - e.g. if you bought one lightstick and a t-shirt you'd be roughly in that price area, and a lot of people bought a lot more. There were long lines with people waiting to buy stuff, and I got told by various people where I could find items that were sold out at one stand (without asking them specifically, everybody just randomly told me where I could buy merch). Besides the stalls at the arena there was also the pop-up store, but I didn't go there. I saw people with Ateez merch all over Cologne the day before, so, ka-ching! Those fur coats are purring, baby.

(This is not a dig towards Ateez, obvs - all bands make money via merch, and I think all big name artists are riding this wave. Munich was flodded with people carrying Adele totes last summer! Apparently Taylor Swift sells light sticks shaped lke stars? I just noticed that there seemed to be a lot of merch sales here, unlike e.g. the concerts I usually go to, where there seems to be a lot less merch.)

So we had no merch and weren't dressed up, which was a little dumb later on because it turned out I had accidentally booked seats very close to the stage (disclaimer: i knew we had good seats and they were very expensive, I just hadn't realised they were this close.), and with very close I mean three rows up, basically on eye height with whoever happened to wander over to this corner of the stage. Which was basically almost everyone (besides Mingi, whom I had specifically wanted to see up close - he passed by a few times and jumped around close to us, but he didn't look at my section. Bro. Why. I came to stare at your incredible face.)

It kind of was nice to be this close, but it also meant we saw the show from the side and not form the front, and everything that happened on the part of the stage jutting out into the arena was basically not in our line of sight. The big screen was directly above us so we could watch there, but it also meant it was hard to keep an eye on the stage and watch the screen. I basically ignored the screen after a while in favor of watching what was happening on the other side of the walkway stage, so I saw most of the formations, well, from behind. And that was super interesting because it showed a lot about the spacing and the synchronisation, but also, d'uh. I'd been looking forward to see the "Say My Name" choreo (because, well, Mingi, you catch my drift), but like this I kinda saw it from behind (and Mingi tends to wear longer costume pieces that cover his backside all the way down to mid thighs, so no staring at that, either. Oh, well.).

Yeah, anyway, the seats were still good because up this close I got to see some interesting choreo things closer up (I have a lot of thoughts on Yunho vs Mingi's dance styles now), but also experience the magic of a kpop group working their crowd. And boy are they good at this, it's incredible. I'm fascinated by the whole parasocial relationships kpop as an industry fosters, but the way the concerts deepen this already existing relationship is incredible.

The concert was clearly seperated into the strictly choreographed parts (songs/dances/interludes) where everybody as focused on getting everything right down to the second, and then the "freeform" parts where they were just walking around, working the crowd. But these are of course also choreographed, and I think rather tightly so. There was the obvious mandate of everyone having to work every side of the stage at some point and they were really good with it. I kept count of who came to my side of the stage to wave at my block, and besides Mingi (who for some reason didn't really drop by, but then I also think he wasn't having a great day at the Cologne concert - incidentally I also watched him to track when exactly they were doing tightly choreographed parts and where they were moving into the more "freeform" moments because it was very obvious when he went from 'I gotta be there do this move look at the camera' to 'okay, chill, hit your mark but otherwise it's fine' mode just by the way his eyeline would change when his focus shifted).

Okay, so since this is getting very long, here's my favorite example of why working the crowd is such a brilliant move, beause it works even on someone who isn't a fan: my poor partner, whom I had more or less forced to come with me despite his dislike for popular culture in general.

He had no former experience with kpop, he didn't know Ateez (I gave him the task to pick a bias during the concert, which lended some fun results). So we were generally not blending into the crowd very well because we did not have merch, no lightstick and we were the only ones in our block who did not have phones out. I took three pictures in total, but then I just put my phone away. But we were also very much in sight of whoever came to the side of our stage, and I could tell we were getting noticed for not performing fandom properly, to the point where clearly at least one member - Seonghwa - apparently started to wonder what the hell we were doing at the show (though we were both vibing, whopping and generally showing obvious signs of having a very good time - at some point I was grooving to the beat and Hongjoong came up and laughed at me, grooving along).

So one time Seonghwa came to our side of the stage, and simply stood there waving - and he didn't stop until my utterly confused partner realised that he was the target of the whole thing and waved back. Then Seonghwa pointed at my partner and made a heart, my partner made a heart back, then Seonghwa gave him a thumbs up and raised an eyebrow, and my partner did some combination of a thumbs-up and a heart to convery that he liked the show, and Seonghwa actually laughed, waved once more and wandered away.

It worked fantastically, on both of us: my confused partner spent the rest of the show manically giggeling (because Seonghwa kind of came over to ask him if he liked the show??), and I was so stunned having witnessed Seonghwa beaming at my dude (like, wtf, how did my man not faint) that I missed half of the next song. My partner was stupidly proud of himself for the remaining evening, and nearly bought a t-shirt on the way out. (He still didn't pick Songhwa as his bias, which will never stop confusing me. After all of that?! I'd also like to add that Seonghwa is really and seriously drop-dead gorgeous.).

Okay, this is getting way out of hand. Let me sum up the remaining thoughts with bullet points: the sound quality was the best I've ever experienced in a concert; please wear hearing protection if you're ever going to a concert of this type; they were indeed singing live, Hongjoong asked us to sing "Lemon Tree" bcs it's from a german band and then was confused when the whole arena started to belt the entire song out forming an impromptu 20.000-ppl-strong choir; I felt like Mingi had an off day and needed some time to get his mojo on; Yeosang is a fantastic performer and while I never been interested in him he really caught my eye on stage because he was so good; San really looks like that (what the hell); I felt there was an interesting dichotomy of those members who were playing to the audience around them and those who were more focussed on the camera (Wooyoung being the latter one, for example); BBTripping were amazing, holy shit; Ateez' english was difficult to understand but I guess they tried.

And everybody kept talking about the energy in the room and I've read reviews of people being amazed, but I thought the crowd was a bit lame (please note that I am old, I have experienced boyband concerts in the late 1990s and I thought I'd once more witness an entire arena loose their fucking shit over some hot guys - but they didn't! Girls and Boys and Queers, what's wrong with you?! Everybody was dressed so amazingly and showed so much creativity, and then? Sure, there was some screaming, but I'd expected more hysterics, more hype, more party? Everybody just stood around waving their lightstick a bit or maybe some jumping, but they couldn't dance because they would have dropped their damn phones and missed out on the twentieth picture of San smiling. Today's youth, I don't get it.)

I also have thoughts on the performance (concert vs musical style) and because I spent an insane amount staring at Yunho's feet and Mingi's arms on those two and their very different dance styles. But this is too long. Let me know if you want a second part, and also, why did you read all of this? You're insane. G'night!

[queer-crusader]

Look I don't wanna bitch but if your Tumblr fic takes longer to scroll past than the Do You Love The Colour Of The Sky post then it would be kinda appreciated if you put the majority of it under a Read More button

[shyhandart]

#STIMMING!!

[hinamie]

post-graduation trip airport looks

[bruciemilf]

I think it’d be so funny if Bruce just refuses to disclose the existence of Robin to the league. He knows it’d take less than a minute for them to form a wicked mock club against him.

Except he just? Carries Robin around. Under that endless void that is his cape. Clark pinches the stress point between his brows. “Batman, is that a child under your cape?”

“No.”

“Bruce I can HEAR his heartbeat.”

“I think the long exposure to kryptonite partially damaged your brain. There is no child here, Clark.”

“He’s literally drinking Barry’s coffee right now.”

“He’s WHAT-“

[starii-void]

going to chb must be crazy like imagine sharing a camp with

-one of the strongest demigods ever who's saved the world like at least 3 times, fought multiple gods & titans and WON (and is a tartarus survivor)

-the literal main architect of OLYMPUS who's also saved the world multiple times (also tartarus survivor)

-THE lord of the wild who's also close friends with the first two (and has helped save the world multiple times)

-an emo kid from the 1930s who again helped save the world and is also a tartarus survivor (TWICE)

-a son of apollo who survived tartarus with nothing but cargo shorts and sheer will (pun intended)

-the main designer and builder for the argo II, also the first hephaestus kid to have fire powers since hundreds of years ago (did i mention killed gaea? no? yeah he did that too)

-a girl who somehow charmspeak-ed gaea into falling back asleep (also side note daughter of super famous actor because why not)

-pretty much everybody is a two-time war veteran

-THE GOD APOLLO who just sometimes comes down to visit in the form of a teenage boy

-did i mention dionysus, god of wine madness and theatre

-also chiron, trainer of pretty much every greek hero ever

[danmeichael]

love triangle to ot3 not as in "i just think these characters should kiss" but as in there is a special bond between two people who love the same person more than themselves, more than anything else and eventually the rage and possessiveness will evaporate, you can't be scared and snarling forever, and when it does they will be left with the understanding that this is maybe the only person on earth who gets it. who gets what it means to be utterly consumed by this person, to love them so much you would open a vein at their request. this person, your "rival" perhaps understands you more than even the object of your affection. they have felt the same longing and the same fear and the same anger and the same desperation as you. they will go to the same lengths to keep your mutual beloved safe. and isn't that a little bit like looking in a mirror. isn't that a little bit like love.

[zarla-s]

I haven't updated this in a while, but that's a good thing! No news is good news when it comes to the bot warfront, haha. There are still some scattered reports of bots, but I haven't seen any personally when I check and the people I ask haven't see any. Is this the new status quo...?

The big thing is that it has now been TWO MONTHS of botfree TF2! TWO MONTHS!! This was an absolutely IMPOSSIBLE dream back then, and even now I still can't believe it. After years of neglect, two whole months!! There's a real chance this could last all the way to the Halloween event! I know this is the bare minimum of care and it's appallingly late on Valve's part, but still! Two whole months after years of torment... make sure to enjoy it while you have it if you haven't played it yet, haha.

[Second post with new updates]

Valve went through and banned a whole bunch of bots yesterday and when I last checked a couple hours ago, the Casual servers are still 99% actual people! If you want to try out TF2 DO IT NOW while you have the chance! Believe me when I say that having matches this clear of bots is RARE. They'll be back in force inevitably in probably a couple days so the window of opportunity here is small. Take the chance to play a normal round of TF2 Casual while you can!

[pakchoys]

there’s poetry and clarinet on that tape, greg

[pears-palette]

Here's to 10 years of being in the Unknown!

I tried to incorporate something from every episode, and while it was tedious, I am so proud of this piece!

[ID in Alt]

[mari-lair]

the sound of fondness

[tiffycat]

Learning the hard way that comic book physics don't apply to real life

[bacchuschucklefuck]

january month of yuugi

[salamispots]

speedrunning a bday gift for bb nephew hjdfgjh