#WHY DOES MY BRAIN HATE ME LIKE THAT
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was reading a text for a class and started to cry bc I remembered Missy’s face and soft voice when she said “Me too” in The Doctor falls
#😭😭#posting this made me start to cry again#im in my missing Missy hours#should I study or should I watch s10 again ?#haha joke#or not…#COME BACK TO ME MY BEAUTIFUL WOMAN#doctor who#dr who#dw#the doctor falls#missy!master#missy dw#missy doctor who#gomez master#the master#THE WORST PART IS THAT THE TEXT WAS ABOUT ARISTOTLE#NOTHING TO DO WITH MISSY#AT ALL#WHY DOES MY BRAIN HATE ME LIKE THAT
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[spoilers for arcane season two]
reference to transformers: one
I just thought that this scene suits them very well 😔


if I had a nickel each time my favorite pair ended up breaking up because one of them had chosen violence and prioritized revenge over their partner I would have 2 nickels which is not much but it's weird that it happened twice


#transformers#arcane#shitpost#transformers one#tf one#tf one megop#megop#megatron x optimus prime#the urge to draw jayce biting the curb is killing me#arcane spoilers#arcane season 2#caitvi#caitlyn kiramman#vi#does anyone else see the vision#caitlyn arcane#vi x caitlyn#i'm mentally unwell#after season 2 act 2#did gods thought that I'm too easily getting over megop and decided to smack me with caitvi angst#well in ep 6 they seem to be back but uhh#I hate this autumn#LIKE HELLOO VI LITERALLY QUESTIONING HER WHY DOES CAIT ACT LIKE JINX IF SHE'S THE ONE SHARING A BLOOD WITH HER???#ISN'T IT'S THE SAME SCENE BUT IN DIFFERENT SETTING??#my brain isn't braining#league of legends#league of legends arcane#fanart#artists on tumblr
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Aroace Sonic Pt 7
Sonic the Hedgehog everybody
#KNOX ART (me)#Sonic the Hedgehog#Amy Rose#Aroace Sonic#coughs coughs#can’t let it get too real y’know?#something about how he’s just enough of a jerk to make sure people don’t care TOO much or look TOO deeply into why he does things#I’ve rambled about it before#him being kind and good enough that his friends will rely on him but JUST enough of a jerk that they don’t feel the need to check on him#everything about this guy scratches my brain look at him#he’s deranged he’s whatever you need him to be he’s taking Amy on a friend date to cheer her up after a long day and then making fun of her#for liking him#he’s terrible he’s literally the best thing that’s happened to most of his friends they hate him they love him he’s a mess he’s untouchable#seriously tho these two just remind me of cotton candy im ;-;
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the idea that demise controls not just ganondorf but really anything deemed 'evil' seems to be very widespread in the fandom and im wondering where that came from?
demise was one throw away end boss that, even with the unfortunate lore implications and damage it did to any other antagonist even in retrospect, was never associated with controlling others? (isnt it mostly ghirahim that summons or corrupts things in skyward sword too?) is it just bc he is the (said to be) the ultimate origin of all things "bad" so clearly he is the one controlling everything even post mortem? he is never relevant again and plays an honestly tiny role in the very game he is introduced in (the only one too)- we dont even know what he is capable of given how little he does even in his own fight- he very clearly dies at the end, doesnt fi even say whatever is left of him will be fully eradicated within the master sword??
...
is it bc of the one line he is always reduced to? (its the damn line he always gets reduced to isnt it..)
#ganondoodles talks#zelda#yes this is the demise apologist in me speaking#SOMEWHAT#bc really ...HES DEAD leave him alone :C#demise of all characters being your fav really is a burden sometimes#i cant hate people that hate him for what he did to the lore#but also ............... its not his fault he was written that way#as if there was much thought put into him anyway :/#but it does annoy me he is always the scapegoat for EVERYTHING#like ganondorf cant even be a villain in his own right or whatever no hes clearly controlled by demiseeee the big puppet master#soemthing he is never associated wiiiiith#also if we were to go with the thing of ooooh theres always an incarnation of light and bad and all#whats to say he IS the origin of all things deemed bad#maybe hes just another guy in the row of 'against the gods' so clearly hes eviiil#he got fucked over by the gods so he is full of hate for them- why wouldnt he be-#(do not tell me about the manga stuff- zelda manga doesnt exist for me)#.... demise still switches my brain on#theres arguably the least amount of stuff to him and yet .. i will find a way to yap hours about him ...#he still carries the title of blorbo for a reason after all
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i enjoy this scene in average amounts
#URRRRGHHH I HATE THEM. I HATE THIS#I NEED TO TEAR UP A BRAND NEW SOFA WITH MY TEETH DAWG#me when the uncle & niece enemies-slash-besties local problem havers are having problems [inhuman grin]#their dynamic is so good. every interaction is so rich#i just . i can feel all of the love and care that went into this show esp with scenes like this#why tf does the lore have to go so hard. how come they’re all written so spectacularly#idk. idk man . they are my emotional support fucked up found family and frankly? i need a lifeline rn#can i get uhhhh massive dr two brains and wordgirl 2 hour clip comp IV drip. now please#wordgirl#dr two brains#no id
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Continuing the JJK posting: Gojo is such a mystifying character.
Action show where swinging out the gate you introduce a character who is so incredibly powerful you then have to, before every fight, establish why Gojo can't just show up and fix the problem in seconds. His existence weakens the stakes of everything. The rest of the show you are backflipping ridding yourself of him. He jobs two major bad guys off the gate and every subsequent extensive fight with them feels like cleaning up his leftovers. Put him in a box, he's ruining the game balance. So absolutely broken. As a writer it makes your job so difficult, but it's also the entire point of him. "Hey I want to write the single most badass character of all time who can do the most insane shit but I will also engage with that", rock on king.
I think he's most interesting when understood as somebody who is fundamentally alien and removed from ordinary human thought processes. In his world there is absolutely nothing he cannot do, and the thought 'maybe I can't do something' just doesn't occur to him. He is capable of doing whatever he wants and of killing anybody who tries to stop him from doing what he wants. If he is not doing something, it is because he does not want to do it. If he wants to do something (kill all of his superiors) and he's not doing it, it's because he doesn't think it's the most effective route towards what he has decided to do. I think this informs the majority of his actions (and, importantly, what he doesn't do)(murder). I think he's reasoned out that you should have a general reason to do things, and it feels like sheer luck that he places value and meaning in human life, and as such you shouldn't kill them without a strong reason. Watching the flashback arc, if I hadn't seen a) JJK and b) Naruto and you asked me which shitty teen became a law abiding school teacher and which became a mass murderer I would have guessed the wrong ones.
Anyway, the way I like to think of him, he's a raging narcissist with a god complex to match. Horrifically, he's actually a good teacher, but he is also a teacher as an ego/'raising my child army' thing. He would be the kind of mother who is a good mother but lowkey had kids also as an ego/unconditional love/lots of attention/'surely my child will worship me' thing. Gets randomly into new hobbies, obsesses over them, gorges himself on the novelty factor, before dropping them in a week once he gets too good at them. Rinse and repeat. The only hobby that does not eventually grow boring is annoying people, so it's his only hobby. Geto told him age 15 that he'll never have any friends if he keeps on casually reminding people that they live on his sufferance, so he developed another back-up hobby more conducive for friendship of helping people forget that they live on his sufferance. This has convinced him that he's a god of subterfuge, intrigue, and trickery. Does eat women out, but is convinced that this makes him God's gift to women, and is actually pretty terrible in bed because his partner's desires never even occur to him. Is convinced he's as good at sex as he is everything else. Sex is actually the one thing he's bad at, but he's not ready to hear that.
In S1 he overall left me with the general impression that his entire idea of how high school worked was sourced from anime, and as such decided that being a teacher involved nothing but field trips, sports games, beach episodes, sports festivals, etc. Did not know how the classroom component worked so he skips it. Jossed, but also left me convinced that it would be very funny if he was an immortal 150-whatever years old and had founded the high school himself out of, you guessed it, an ego thing, and never once properly learned how high schools worked and just arbitrarily made his own aging students the new principals so he could continue engaging in training the kids who are too Misfit (TM) to get apprenticeships and living his fun slice of life anime life and raising a child army of kids who will worship him any day now. Annnyyyy day now. Any day now.
#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#gojo satoru#jjk gojo#jujutsu gojo#my posts#this makes it sound as if i hate him and think he's a terrible person#to be clear i think he's great and i just find characters most interesting when theyre terrible#watching the show i was just generally waiting for it to follow up on his established teenage homicidality#explain why and when he stopped being two thin hairs from murdering everyone he disliked#but they didn't so i have to suppose he's just chilled out a little#fic authors arent going far enough with him. i dont think his brain should resemble a human persons.#the 'i am above humanity' thing shouldn't be an angst thing it should be a factor of his psychology#thank you dora for stealth co-writing this post love you#might write the immortal thing might not. writing such a weird POV does sound fun to me though; id like to do it#itll either be very easy or very very hard#it feels like genuine straight-up luck that gojo's an active good guy. liike what.
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i once read a fic with an EXTREMELY twinky ooc Erik Lehnsherr
Wow, you never would’ve guessed this is Magneto, Master of Magnetism.

#i was goong to pick out one of his more ‘intimidating’ pictures but this one called out to me#btw i read said fic like months ago i do not remember the name of it#so don’t ask me ❌#my brain likes to remind me who exactly i’m reading about#‘YASSS BITCH’ WHO ARE YOU????#Erik Lehnsherr IS a happy bunny???? 🤨🤨#no hate to the author i’m sure you were doing your best ❤️❤️😔😔#what is it with people needing to feminize/twinkify one half of a male relationship 🤨🤨🤨#why are we bringing heteronormativity into my gay ships 😧#i did not ask for this 👆#cherik#erik lehnsherr#magneto#x men#wish does not shut up
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you say they can’t put telepaths in marvel rivals, yet we have some very credible leaks that jean grey and emma frost are gonna be in the game soon.
that being said, jean has telekinesis (and the phoenix force) and emma has her diamond form. telepathy is all charles has, lmfao. odds are pretty low for him, but maybe not zero if they give him telekinesis!
if yall have me say he got psionic blasts one more time i am going to scream HE HAS MORE THAN TELEPATHY . LIMITED BUT HE HAS IT <- he has gone against sentinels and disabled armies with it before HE CAN FIGHT I PROMISEEE
and technically they did give him telekinesis in krakoa (and very weak telekinesis sometimes before krakoa) so .... not my fave move but he does have that ...... and ig they give him a gun sometimes ........ last resort type shit but he has options ..
#snap chats#area man gets too passionate about charles xavier more at 12#also did i not say emma had her diamond form or did i delete that tag#omg no i deleted the tag fuck my life. please believe me i did say emma had her diamond form i didnt think anyoned care tho#but with charles. as i said before. he has more than telepathy ...#limited but .. it exists options exist ... he can also Arguably control machinery#i say Arguably cause im still figuring out how he controls machines he says he does with his mind#then he can Also read like ??? SOME kinda waves in sentinels ??? that was a thing im p sure#BUT YEAH NO LISTEN this is what im saying when i say he could be a support character and not a duelist#as if anyone was contemplating duelist charles ........#lol i love how i call 'vanguards' tanks and 'strategists' supports but i stick with duelist for damage. sorry duelist better#anyway let charles be support it'll never happen because this game hates me but i can dream#listen im just saying maybe charles can have a move that disables machinery or something#like punisher or iron man... maybe like a temporary lock on weapons... just one target#lmao wait im just thinking of sombras ult from ow arent i. yeah fuck it why not he can have a disable-all-skills ult idc vejRLKAERJE#sounds bout right for how sneaky he is sometimes .....#his left and right clicks could lit just be psionic blasts of varying strength and speed#doesnt even have to do physical damage ... mental damange .... what the difference right the brain sayin There Is Pain anyway..#maybe charles could have a sonar ability that lets him (maybe nearby allies too) see through walls for like. three seconds... 50M range....#like yk what i mean he can sense where people are thats my idea...#LIKE LET ME COOK MARVEL LET MEEE IN <- dont ill make him busted or horrible there is no in between
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But like
Why chronic illness?
Why chronic fatigue?
Why body suck?
#sincerely me#why does my body hate me#why does my brain work like this#why#chronic illness#chronic fatigue#I’m always sick 😭#whyyyy#depression as well lol#chronic depression#pcos#insulin resistance#pre diabetic#spoonie#spoon theory#spoons#undiagnosed chronic illness#I got something more I know it#I’m thinking pots#maybe?#pots#pots syndrome
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also i hate to admit it and i swear i DO understand the importance of them but fellas i fear i may be steadily morphing into a humanities hater
#the lack of required humanities teaching is likely directly related to why things are so fucked up stupid right now and they are SO crucial#but it is a fact that now every time i think about writing an essay i get slightly nauseous#specifically avoided taking any humanities classes this semester & ONE of my classes has an essay and im genuinely nervous abt it#i'm not a math whiz but at least it's more justifiable to be bad and hateful of numbers. shit has me- the chronic rambler- scared of words#im so. so sick of final projects. just give me a fucking bubble sheet i'm so serious it is significantly less stress and effort#why do professors act like writing a 5 page essay for 4 different classes is easier than filling out a piece of paper & leaving in an hour#and why does it feel like most of my peers AGREE. WHY WOULD YOU PREFER THAT#I GET THAT A LOT OF PEOPLE GET TEST ANXIETY BUT THAT IS LIKE TWO HOURS OF STRESS VS TWO WEEKS TO A MONTH OF STRESS I DONT GET IT#this is not a tangent because humanities classes will almost always have an essay instead of a test and it will almost always be an essay.#eye twitch. but as long as everyone else is happy about not having to circle things on a piece of paper i guess. its okay. its fine#anyway my other reasonings are that shit really is boring im sorry i cant. i cannot get into it i really do try my best#and also all the classes are annoyingly early which just really does not help their association in my brain#sigh. the humanities play a very important role in education and society as a whole and they deserve to be mandatory. get them away from me
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I occasionally wish to reach out to old friends/acquaintances I haven't spoken to since high school/some other even earlier time in my life, but I have SOOO little social energy even for required tasks (like making dr phone calls or etc), I never have any leftover for extra ones, and it would be very odd to message someone I haven't spoken to in like 5 years out of the blue but then take 4 entire months to respond back lol.. My natural curiosity with nostalgia/collecting details of the past/etc. (literally if I were born a little earlier I would definitely do scrapbooking or something lol) is very strong, but, alas, not strong enough to beat out the Social Issues Demons apparently
#facebook always does that 'here's a post from this day 8 years ago' thing. and I see old comments interacting#with people and it's so like.. OOOOO~~ where are they now?? what's going on? how much have they changed as people?#how much are they the same? this is fascinating. i should contact them!!' but then it's like... take that to it's logical conclusion though#you would contact them and then IF they even responded it would take you 80 years to respond and then they would#think there was something wrong or that you were trying to be insulting or something. To contact anyone I need to include an 85 page#disclaimer of all of my social issues & mental illness things. 'If i take 3 weeks to reply I promise it has nothing to do with u' etc lol#THIS is why more people need to be into phone calls/voice calls/some form of audio real time communication/etc.#I think one of the main things that's hard about messaging through text for me is it's so unscheduled and open ended#(plus it takes forever if you're talking about anything in detail and gets very long very quickly)#because like you can send a message and then just get a reply whenever. and then you're expected to reply back whenever#so it's like you never know when the response will come or when a new obligation to reply can come up? so it's like this sudden thing with#no outline?? if that makes sense. whereas a phone call is very like 'hello let's schedule a call from 10am - 2pm on thursday'. And you know#EXACTLY when the interaction will start and EXACTLY when it will end and you can plan around it in your schedule easily.#I have the reverse thing of a lot of people (how people don't pick up phone calls/hate calls/only text)#I would literally talk on the phone with a stranger. I would have a discord voice chat with someone I barely know.#if someone I hardly even remember from elementary school asked to have a voice call with me out of nowhere I would do it.#but if a stranger MESSAGED me?? or someone I barely know sent me a TEXT or something?? I will never reply probably#It's just too vague and weird. and you can't read voice tone over text. and the interaction could last forever with no clear end#point and etc. etc. But a call is like. set. established. clear boundaries. you can read the flow of conversation better. rapport. etc. etc#I get that I guess people feel more anonymous or distanced over text?? but you can have fake phone numbers on the computer. or do like disc#rd calls. or zoom without a camera or etc. etc. Also the distance that's present in text is BAD distance because it just means that tone is#not conveyed properly and you will never truly get a sense of the person's conversational vibe or mannerisms or how well you really click.#ANYWAY ghgjh...... I'm so so so interested in concepts of like.. How did that one kid I used to talk to in elementary school#but then they moved away in 5th grade - how did they end up? what are they doing now?? etc. etc. Like despite the severe social anhedonia#and general lack of connection with others I'm just really fascinated in like.. idk. the human development of it all and like#the concept of how we're actually a million different people through the course of our lives ever evolving in different iterations and etc.#PLUS again. i love nostalgia. sometimes old peple you know might remember a shared memory or can tell you about something you forgot#or etc. like it's SUCH A COOL THING in CONCEPT but I am too socially inept generally speaking lol. which people I still talk to today are#familiar with my 'phone call once every few months' communication style. but strangers would just be like... wtf. And I don't blame them#Sure I literally cannot change the physical health + brain issues i have - but also I know enough to not put others through that lol
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youtube
Ngl I’m tempted to animate something from that one canon au where Kusuo dies with this cover
#I will never not take an opportunity to post about Will Stetson#I typically don’t care for English covers or dubs or anything but holy shit man he’s an exception for me#I’m a little ashamed to admit he has some covers that I actually prefer to the original#Like “nothings working out”#Which is also a very Saiki brothers coded song tbh#Specifically Kuusuke coded#WHY DID TUMBLR TAG THIS YOUTUBE DONT DO THAT WITHOUT MY PERMISSION ??#Oh actually speaking of English covers (I really like the art of song translation sorry) there’s actually one that’s not by Will Stetson#that I really like#The rolling girl cover by lollia#she makes it like? Rock? It’s so cool#and back to Will Stetson he does a cover of hated by life itself that has rap and when I first saw that I was like hmmmm how is that gonna#work out yk#BUT ITS SO SO GOOD? AND IT KIND OF ENHANCES THE EXPERIENCE ACTUALLY#That song (the original moreso) is also imo saiki coded#Hey can u guys tell my brain is rotted#i love translation one of my fav external/non story parts ab the saiki manga besides Asous ramblings is the translators notes#Like them explaining how the joke works and the context behind it and why a joke might be hard to translate#its so interesting to me
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just read the new mutants issue where Charles chose to stay behind in space and my god the juxtaposition between Charles trusting Erik and Erik joining the hellfire club and wondering at his own trust worthiness. I wonder how much of Charles decision was him ultimately trying to avoid the fact that his first class had seemingly betrayed mutant kind and not be willing to face them and how much of it was Dani and Illyana's reaction to him having Karma mind control Illyana. the fact that Illyana was depending on him to ease her mind through limbo and in choosing to stay he forced karma to do it instead, probably fucking up their relationship in the process.
I love him, this is crazy, how much of this is him trying to runaway and how much is this him not trusting himself to fix things and how much is it just him trusting Erik?
i keep trying to put into words my exact thoughts about the sitch but there really is a lot for one issue aintit... oh charles you and your brain...
#snap chats#thats why we have tag rambles AHAHA#ok so to tackle things one at a time charles ultimately deciding to stay in space despite his expressed want to return to earth#obviously it was when lilandra pointed out if her sister took charge of the shi'ar then the universe- earth included- would be in peril#charles notes his position as a losing one: whichever choice he makes he loses#he goes to earth then the universe could be at stake/he stays in space he loses his kids#of course charles COULD just put his faith in the starjammers but is that a risk he wants to take ? evidently not#charles' reoccurring flaw is he's willing to sacrifice personal relationships for the greater perceived good#even lilandra acknowledges this- that charles' homesickness for earth was an inevitability just as she is indebted to protecting the stars#so now his ruptured relationship with illyana and co- esp right after comforting a split illyana last issue#we've seen charles act more coldly/rashly when he's about to lose people (i think of his first death with the og5 mostly)#i mean it's a key part to charles' chara that he doesn't favor mind controlling others and im sure he has the same regard for his students#he's aware of the damage it can do and in this instance- for one reason or another- he orders it to be done regardless#im sure he does this as a form of defense: if his kids are upset with him they won't feel too bad about losing him and it'll be less painfu#obviously we still see sam wish charles farewell and wish for him to come back soon but yk.. worthy attempt..#and it's not as if charles wants them to hate him ENTIRELY.. he's still touched by sam's goodbye no.... fickle man he is..#i dont think charles is totally afraid to confront the og5- its what made him want to return to earth with the nms initially#tho again.. could his decision to stay in the stars be influenced by that? that maybe he ISNT prepared to confront them like he thought?#who's to say... not me i dont got that psych degree yet..#erik being charles' trusted confidant definitely made his decision easier on top of that: i mean is he needed if he has a substitute#i think charles DOES wholly trust erik: charles really doesnt approach his x-men half heartedly. from his pov ofc#if he didn't genuinely believe in erik's potential he wouldn't have picked him; hes a comforting thought when charles decides to depart#'although i'm gone erik understands me and my goals enough to continue my work as good as i would have so i have nothing to worry about'#which. yk. makes the whole White King thing kinda awkward VJAELVJEAKL charles you fool#i have no idea how this saga ends though... tbh im only on ish 45 of NM i just read 50 and 51 to get context for this ask#so i can only wait and see how this saga turns out... once i finish reading house of m/secret invasion stuff jvLKEJKA#idk im tired and rambling dont pay attention to me.. ramblin bout charles' brain is a good day for me regardless if i make sense jVLAJ
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People talk about fast metabolisms like it's all fun and games and eating whatever you want but they fail to remember that it also means your body is Incredibly Stupid and decides that you become deficient in everything in a couple or so days where it takes most others a week. Or months compared to "oops you forgot to photosynthesize sufficiently :( no i don't care that it has been freezing and overcast for the past week, you didn't absorb enough sun. Perish Badly."
Or at least it would be if i didn't like citrus fruits so much, probably
#glaring at whatever secret brain section is in control of my body resource management. why am i iron deficient again. it has been 2½ days.#and all that has been spent mostly SLEEPING because GUESS WHAT ALSO DOESN'T WORK RIGHT BECAUSE OF METABOLISM.#SLEEP AIDS. LIKE MELATONIN#i have to take a double dose if i want these fucking dumb ass gummies to do anything. otherwise they don't do shit unless I'm already asleep#but guess what? i can't get to sleep :) because another thing in the list of Patch Problems is chronic insomnia. and i can't sleep#so the melatonin does ✨️NOTHING✨️#same goes for pain meds and local anesthetics because my metabolism is so so good at it's job :) when it does not need to be#like bbg we are not poisoned we are at the dentist CALM THE FUCK DOWN??? SO I DON'T FEEL THE DAMN DRILL IN MY TOOTH?????#hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhg#i do not need so many issues stacked on top of eachother#istg i would not have survived in any century before this one. what do you mean i get sickly deficient in things in less time than Normal™️#i can't even drink plain water or it makes me nauseated. body why are you Stupid#patchy rambles#is this slightly incomprehensible? probably#but it is 1 in the morning and i am pissed at my own body for hating me so much and this is My Blog so i put My Problems on it#rgrgrgrgr
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Had such an awful terrible dream that I'm scared to go back to sleep 😮💨
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I never asked to be here
#why does hating working make me a bad person in their eyes? it isnt my fucking problem you worked until your brain broke and were committed#if anything i think they're stupid for that#and yet they call me worthless. like im a piece of garbage on the side of the road
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