#why does my brain hate me

[faulty-rob]

Virgil just go to sleep istg

(Also can I just say I’m rlly proud of the lighting in this :D)

[dramaticallycryingblood]

Sometimes I’m having a nice day, and then I suddenly remember that four of my favourite characters are canonically active members of a kkk type of racist cult

[louferrignojrofficial]

24 hours to write 2 essays and i have an 8 hour shift. can i do this? probably not

[corky-chicken]

For some reason my brain woke me up with a terrifying image of Officer Bailey.

See I've got a thing about eyes. I call it Elton John Syndrome cause I first noticed it about him. In short, it's were someone wears glasses for so long that seeing their eyes is genuinely terrifying to me. To me examples of those with it are Elton John (duh), Ringo Starr, Engineer, and Sniper from TF2.

And now, for some reason, Bailey has that, in my head. But it's weird for him because Curt does not have EJ syndrome and my favorite scene/pic of Bailey has him showing his eyes! I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY NOW HE'S GOT TERRIFYING HYPER-REALISTIC - TO MUCH SO EVEN FOR A HUMAN - EYE BALLS!??

[asmolboi]

Not sure if this is just me but istg neurotypical people dangerously underestimate how easy it is to break my brain.

Like if someone tells me to do something and I don’t trust them enough to ask for help because my brain is hardwired against assistance then I’ll do it, sure, but if I get some sort of roadblock or something I’m not sure how approach on the way to doing it? Hooooooooo boy you bet that I’m gonna get stuck in a feedback loop of not being able to do it on my own, not asking because I don’t wanna come off as stupid or provoke the person who set me the thing to do, and not NOT finishing the thing before doing other shit cause “Well this person told me to do a thing and I should do it first to get it out the way right?”

Inevitably leading to me not getting ANYTHING done for a worryingly large portion of the day until I either get past the thing I was stuck on or just go “Fuck it” and take a shower.

[anthro-cat]

okay so.

me being useless: NOT MY FAULT me falling off: CAUSED BY CIRCUMSTANCES me thinking im lonely: JUST BAD SELF ESTEEM

im thinking maybe its all just a lie caused by my brain to conspire against me

[caesariawritesstuff]

I had a dream last night that someone on TikTok absolutely tore Cat & Mouse to shreds and even rewrote parts of the story to make it "better" so let me tell you I woke up in a panic like

[warmpeachxo]

My mind is a prison these nights…

[notastraykid]

My brain is fucking with me. It reminds me that I'm not anyones first choice, that there are better people that can and will replace me as the better choice and I will simply fade into the shadows and out of thoughts.

Wwhhyy am I like tthhiisssssss....

[the-bot-marg0t]

''''''''''

[tokalayips]

you ever just remember something really embarrassing you did a while ago and then get second-hand embarrassment all over again?

like, I'll just be binge-watching a musical series *cough cough, nightmare time, cough cough* and then remember that one time in a performance I did where my crown kept threatening to fall off my head, so I had to keep adjusting it, which probably looked really weird to the audience.

[gildedphoenix]

My fic should be somewhere around 15k. So If I do a thousand words every day, I should be finished by .... pulls out a calculator and adds the ADHD modifier December!

[torifuckingspring]

so there's this thing that antidepressants are supposed to make you hungrier right? yeah it's working the other way around for me

[antisoucials]

does anyone get anxiety the day before they go on a trip?

[onlyhereforghost]

Sometimes, my gob gets me in trouble.

Let me explain. I said something about wanting to do something to someone. (I don’t want to use the exact terminology I used for fear of someone I know in my day to day life working out who I am) but it was along the lines of “that person is gorgeous and I’d like to have relations with him should he be interested”. I used no swear words. I said it with a jokey tone in my voice. But apparently, someone who heard it found it to be offensive and inappropriate and reported it to my boss.

The boss called me out on it. I apologised profusely. I explained it was in jest. A laugh. I now realise that yes, anyone who doesn’t know me well could misinterpret what I said. Again, I apologised profusely. It upset me to think I had hurt someone.

What upsets me the most, is that I wasn’t confronted immediately about my comment. At the time it was said. The offended party didn’t say to me “hey, can you not say things like that? It upsets me” I would have immediately apologised to them directly. I would probably have made them a coffee and apologised again.

I sometimes feel very alone, and like everything I say should be monitored. I suspect everything I say IS being monitored to tell you the truth. I am neurodivergent and sometimes my gob overrides my brain. Not an excuse, just a fact. I’ve been masking my entire life, pretending to be normal just to get by on a day to day basis.

I wish I WAS normal. I wish I could be NOT ME for just five minutes. I wish that my brain wasn’t filled with rot sometimes, and that I could function in public like a regular person. But that’s not who I am. I am an idiot.

If you’ve read this, thank you. I appreciate you.

I’m going to go crawl back into my bed and cry some more and look at pictures of Copia. If you’d like to leave me Copia pics I’d appreciate that too. Thanks.

[iwilltrytobereasonable]

hmm I think I will try to sleep so I can wake refreshed and ready to watch OFMD

Brain: Hey How Would You Like To Imagine Explaining To The Important Ex What It Was Like Having The Nervous Breakdown That Led To Your Breakup And Start Weeping Uncontrollably

hey brain fuck you