#why does hating working make me a bad person in their eyes? it isnt my fucking problem you worked until your brain broke and were committed

[dolfin]

I never asked to be here

[revscarecrow]

hi rev i just wanted to come here and rant for a second because i feel like you'll understand. i hope you dont mind.

i'm really, REALLY frustrated that a lot of the current culture around artists complaining about ai is people being like "ugh artists are so sensitive, this use case isnt even that bad, its just funny, its just a meme, etc etc"

as an artist myself i feel like i cant even complain about it in my current online social circles because i will be met with people being like "its not that serious when its used to make memes"

i fucking hate seeing ai. period. it doesnt matter if its google gemini, or chat gpt, or some rancid ai meme, or an ai voice. i hate ALL of it because it reminds me that the ONE THING i thought couldn't be taken from me by robots (my ability to make art/video) is being taken from me in front of my eyes.

even my other artist friends partake in this culture. i seriously dont understand it. it is DEEPLY upsetting and makes me feel so hopeless and powerless.

maybe it's an "if i dont laugh, i'll cry" situation. i dont know. i want to hear your thoughts on it. much love

I talk about AI "art" on my art youtube channel. Suffice to say that generative AI and neural nets can be used for good things like mapping the human brain to help better understand the systems at work and how to help with dementia (this is a real thing that's being done and it's rad btw). While this tech does a lot of energy I think it's worth it to learn how to cure horrible diseases. The tasks that this can do helps solve problems that are either too complex or time intensive for humans to do. Art is about expression to some degree. Some people are just about the aesthics but for me personally I think that the process of coming to and finishing the idea is the art and the canvas is the record of the process happening. As such the spirit behind the creation of an object is core to the aesthic of the piece. If I make a painting out of shit or blood it's going to have a very different vibe than one done with paint. Why was that choice made? Artists make these choices at every step. Some just pick things as a default but that is in itself a choice. I use acrylic when I paint canvases because of the drying time and because I fear my cats will attempt to eat the sugary smelling liquin medium used with oil. The nature of my work area I have means the canvases I paint are smaller. These are choices that change how my work looks but also speak to who I am as a person. AI art does not consider this because how could it? It does not think. It's a disgusting similacrum of the human experience. Memes still gross me out I'll be honest.

[teddy-feathers]

i hate my aunt.

she made another comment on if i wanted to take more pills or if i wated to grow up and deal with shit.

she does not get that if i didnt have the pills id already be dead. this is not hypothetical. i have wrecked my car on purpose several times, I have too many knives and access to medication and im just smart enough to be a danger to myself. one day i took like a handfull of my actual medication because it was going to fucking help or the next handfull of pills i took wouldnt be to help. and you know what. it fucking helped.

and its not oh youre just reacting badly to stress. no. even when everything was fine id find ways to be stressed or miserable or apathetic. in fact when things were at their best i was often at my worst - and that was after i got back reconnected with family got past the shame started working with a therapist had a job was doing good... and i was still thinking of killing myself. still having days where funtioning was too much like being skinned alive. still being fucking at war with myself from being too up and too down at the same time. and i was doing good. everything was finally better and had been better for a while and i was actively or passively sabotaging that.

and you know what? if there was a possible way to bootstrap myself better, idve fucking found it by now. so being medicated is like actually good for me. and i know it is because when i forget to take my meds or like right now when im switching meds and im fucking miserable and struggling to even pretend to be a person. like im managing to maintain an illusion but its not my best work let me tell you.

that and my best fucking friend are the only reason i called my shrink to say "yeah i actually am not okay" after a week of fucking going "dying sounds nice right now" like honestly and truely if it werent for my best friend id just give up trying.

like i get it. im in a bad place right now and youre worried and you think you know best. but the second you said that snide fucking comment i basically stopped listening. im so fucking furious.

ill give you drug seeking behavior. ill give you taking the god damn easy way out. (she did not say this but you can understand why i think its implied from her fucking attitude)

like. god i want to tell her so bad to stop making comments about it, to just fucking forget im medicated if thats what it takes. because the next time she makes a comment about it that will be the end of the conversation. that is the boundary im setting. that will be the end of the conversation.

but i dont have the fucking balls to set boundries do i.

like. i am sick right now. mentally.

im glad my knives are mostly in the car. im glad my best friend expects me to get up in the morning and gibe her a hug before work. im less glad that i cant bring myself to do things i need to keep my life running but ive got some leeway and hopefully my meds will level me out soon enough that no actual issues arrise. im glad that i might get out of this without fucking up my life or whatever. im glad that this isnt a couple of years ago where suicide seemed like an actual option and i couldnt roll my eyes as i lay here and rot and go "Yeah whatever your being dramatic" and that i know and *can* get up and get fluids and food when im rotting so im not actively making myself worse while i want for it to pass.

i hate that i do have to wait for it to pass. that i feel like if i do certain things it will trigger my own personal apocalypse or breakdown or something. i hate that my thoughts are variations of "i wish i was dead"

but because of the medication, even not at the right level, im not going to drive off the side of the road to deal with my problems.

i hate myself yeah but i hate my aunt and her shitty ass comments.

[inventedfangirling]

ofts episode 7 thoughts in short : 🥺🥺🤌🤌😤😤🤔🤔🤬🤬🤬💯💯😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

in detail :

ohmygod that boston nick confrontation scene was sooooo good...both mark with his hurt and neo with his anger...and all the other underlying emotions all coming to a head...gosh they killed it...i was on the edge of my seat through out!!!

ohemgee and right after that we get that top and mew scene!!! its just the 1st part of the episode but the acting has been phenomenal. force in this portion especially...SO DAMN EMOTIVE just with his eyes. i LOVE IT

okay as much as i LOVE khao and i know its not a huge thing but i cant accept his free movement of his injured hand like that...is is just for show within the show's universe itself so he isnt really hurt cos how could he make such an acting choice otherwise

ray is being such a baby...ohmygod WHAT SMELL ME??? that escalated fast!??!

that few seconds sand took to just ogle at ray's upper body like lmao calm yourself baby there's more to come...pls he even licked his lips...im ded but also i geddit😭😂😭

pls ray in the bathtub and sand next to him had so much potential for cuteness but they chose to make a very valid point about addiction and healing abd what family means and ykw i respect that

boston is such a sick person who treats people like shit but he is so straightforward about it and i cant hate that at all...like pls the way he just coolly walked to the house after the reveal...i wish i had even half his confidence

omg cheum finding and using her voice to yell and curse at boston YES YOU GO GIRL

gawd the one on one scenes in this episode just too damn good??? nick and sand scene just a minute or two but soooo impactful!???

man top really liked mew huh

omg mew on revenge rampage i cant believe nick just gave that info away does he think boston who will lose everything if that video comes out will come crawling back to him!???

um drake is so hot wtf why is this just striking me??? men really shouldnt allow their hair to cover their forehead like puhlissss why you so hell bent on hiding that youre attractive!?!??

okay gap attractive but gap also dumb whatdoyou mean you just left your computer with all this risque videos unattended in front of a random hook up stranger!??

ohemgee mew went straight to ton's house and is now oozing nonchalance as he responds to ton im dyingggg

"for the sake of our friendship" he said🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

ohh they decide to work together and BAM top shows up

ohnoo ray mew im not liking this my raysand feels are getting hurt🤧

wtf wtf wtf was that ending pls tell me it was a bad dream i legit screamed into my pillow no wtaf this isnt whats supposed to happen...messy gays the show messing with me and im shocked for what😭

and the preview for episode 8!?!?!?? ray you seriously treating sand like that??? why am i surprised and not surprised at the same time....the show is playing me and my boy sand so well it actually is homophobic😭

[misspickman]

moss might i please have some trans tim headcanons. or trans kon if you’re feeling it.

Hii blink thank you blink i always have those<3

Kon is nonbinary and transfem to me and i do have a more specific way this happens in mind which is he starts questioning his gender after already figuring out hes not straight, and this is a few years down the line post sb 2011, so hes getting comfortable living on the farm and having a group of friends there, being a part of the kent family (hes never had a family before!!) and its because of that new personal comfort and safety that he can think more about himself as a person and not just. An icon with a role.

I read his tt03 era as his big Repression Period (along with cassie) where he figures he has to be a Normal Real Boy so he ditches the 90s superboy charm for a more traditionally masculine look, which maybe works for his secret identity but isnt what he actually enjoys. So later he starts growing out his hair and tiptoes around more flashy costumes which are daunting now, because kon has a lot of hate for his younger self for being foolish and a try hard, and this all reminds him of himself back then.

Its a slow process but he will get there eventually and i think living with ma helps a lot. Being away from the public eye and with someone who wouldn't judge him for not wanting to look as masculine would do kon wonders. Also he hangs out a lot with the yj girls, and i imagine cissie would eventually she starts putting makeup on him for funsies (and bc cassie doesnt let her) which kon has many feelings about. No worries! Anita braids his hair like she did cissies so many times and kon goes haha does this mean im one of the girls now as a joke and then has many feelings about that too bc what if he Wants to be one of the girls? Uh oh

I have less of a specific timeline for tim so some scattered ones are:

It would take her a long time to make peace with being trans and to come out, bc imo tim would not be a fan of the Coming Out Process. Would hate to do it. Would only do it once its the last feasible option bc shes sick of lying (again) and being seen so wrongly by everyone. I think she just writes cassie a note or something like it would be funny.

Jack having been so obsessed with tim being his perfect masculine son would make all of this especially hard but also make certain stuff make more sense in retrospect. Its impossible to think about tim being queer in any way without thinking back on jacks behavior.

Theres a v sweet image in my head of helena braiding tims hair bc once she lets it grow out tim does not know what to do with it and helena has to do something about that (set in a future where helena knows tims identity. The cowl doesn't really show hair. But boy it must be sweaty gross in there).

While i think kon would be big into makeup and all sorts of fun clothes and shoes i dont imagine tim being That much into it, is not as much of a makeup girlie, loves a nice dress but mostly for occasions and such.

One of the reasons why itd take her so long to figure herself out is she mostly didnt get body dysphoria until she thought of the possibility of Not Being A Man and then started noticing little things that bothered her, bc tim would be very aware of which traditional standards for being a woman she is not fulfilling. Very aware of and held back by the Issue Of Bodies And How They Are Perceived, as you do.

The initial realization would probably be something sudden that she refuses to think about for a while bc tim v much lives by that post thats like i may be trans but i have a job so idc about that rn. Its in the back of her mind and she is Not examining it when there are bad guys to punch out there.

[penisliker-moved]

also isnt if crazy glasses are. the goasses being the crazy thing i mean. who thought of that.... how did they figure out the like.. thick glas thang.... insane. i need glasses rly bad and i have them. but wuy do they hurt my eyes thats so fucked! they should make a glaases that doesnt hurt your eyes. whatever i need to fucking drink more..i hate my job btw i fucking hate guests and theyre always like omg can i get towels. can you hand me a garbage bag Shutttt the fuck up go away idc..... my boss found a gun in a room the touer day !?!?!? it was in the closet on the shelf. so she ws like check the shelf in the closet OR ELSE! and we have to check all th drawers extra carefully. but she ws like. it could go off at ANY MOMENT and im very pro gun safety but i feel likee. probbaly not unless you pull th trigger right..but thats so scary eho would just leave their gun in the room.. bc tgeyre probably like

expensive right woaahhhh de javu. not how thats soelled probabkly. hut like guns r probably like..125$.... mijimum. bc they woudlnt just sell them for like 2dollars. and also why would you 1. bring yr gun on a trip 2. put it on the closet shelf ???? but shs ws like if u find a gun DONT TOUCH IT !Nwhich is a good true thang. but she told us t go gether which is likeee is she allowed to touch it.. or does she jurt fall th cops and go Gunt trigger warning. and the cops take it? and do i atill have to clean the room if i find a gun.. or is it like an ooo (out of order) bc th cops have to come like.look at it. also i was watching buzzfeed hnsolved Sorry but the compilatons are good to listen to at work. and they were like So many murders at hotels.. and well ive never found one... idek what id do like would i cry ??? no bc idk the cunt and also i hate guests. a lot of ppl r like I WS SO SCARED!!! but why be scared girlboss. persons already dead and rh killer isnt gonna just stand next to ir like yas 👍 i did that. laso i think a lot of rhe fear of like. dead bodies. is rly upsetting bc before we like. has wakes and we took carenof our dead n everything... before burial..and i miss that well i wasnt akive. bur i hate the funeral industry a lot and i think ab i need to do a paragrsph break ive been talking for so long.

so like i think abt the funerao indistry a lot bc its so sucks like. I get why some ppl would want the body prepared and stuff. but i think th like. mourning epriod is so important and totally ignored by society... when in olden times theyd like. Be with the body and stuff and i think thats rly important for like..coping with the death.... i miss my grannt so fucking much thats mostly unrelated but i think a lot abtike. i wonder how decomposed she is... idk if thats weird but i think that helps me rationalize it but there arent a lot pf sources on how decomposed shed be. since she ws prepared and everything. but its almost. 2 years now fuck..i rly rly miss her so bad i cant believe shes never comjng bacm. yk. when it happened i dont think it set in bc it ws so sudden and i ws like. like i knew she was dead and ik death is permanent but like. shes rly rly fucking gone. yk

[nonclassyparty]

and the san part 😭😭😭 it's all what yn could do for san but what can san do for yn? love sometimes just isn't enough

Well I assume what yn can do for san is love him whatever he does, and what he can do is at least get to know her? give it a go? see what they can be? ofc if he can't then he can't, he doesn't owe her love & can't be forced but he should at least grant her the possibility as all he's been doing is saying no with no explanation. he's been judging her for so long

tho his kinda guys quickly get swallowed by their pride and just bc homegirl is rich they'll have this inferiority complex and make everything a problem. what if her parents disown her or she decides to go make a life of her own, which will make her financially san's equal, what then?

& what can mingi do for yn? what can yunho? what can any guy? a relationship goes both ways and being there is already giving. but legit question bc I'm curious, what in your eyes can the other guys give?

I think I should get a diary instead of making your ask page my brain dump place hahaha

the worst thing you can possibly do for san is love him no matter what he does bc he said it himself in the teaser (and we'll learn so much more about him in the next chapter) he is selfish and he will use that love to his advantage bc he knows she'll always take him back/forgive him. and san is san, he'll fuck up and he'll hurt people and he'll hate himself but he still won't stop doing what he knows is wrong because some cycles are simply too much work to break and hating yourself is easier. this does not make him a bad person (please however reads this do NOT come into my askbox dragging him😭 idk why im so weirdly defensive over him, probably bc im the one who created his character but also bc i usually dont think people like that are bad people just really sad people)

he doesn't dislike that yn is rich, he feels like yn is ungrateful.

and what can mingi and yunho (still cant believe im even counting him in this it rly came out of nowhere) can do for yn is show her what it means to be loved. they dont struggle with the concept of it, i'll use yunho for example bc he's barely mentioned in the story so far but yn already managed to figure out that he's not scared of commitment, dating, even knows the type of girl he usually goes for etc etc (altho the way yn explains it in the first chapter sounds rly bad but thats bc its her perspective of him which isnt exactly good at the moment). and all this sounds like im saying u shouldnt date people with baggage or something and thats not what i mean at all bc yn has a ton of baggage as well so i just keep wondering how can two people with so much baggage and who are confused about love as much as they are know how to love each other and for it to be healthy? who is going to show who what is the right way you should love someone or how they deserve to be treated or that theres no reason to be scared if they're both scared??

like i genuinely keep going back and forth these days bc i had one ending for the series but recently i've been thinking about another one and i keep trying to figure out how to give yn a happy, healthy relationship with any of these three guys and for it to still stay true to all of their characters even after 2-3 years of a time skip and some very much needed growth..

also i totally don't mind these thought dumps in my inbox bc it really got me thinking a lot 😭❤️

[grzlyinc]

HELTER SKELTER (2012) REVIEW!!

(includes spoilers)

i watched this film for the first time two days ago and it is seriously good. important warning before anyone dicides to watch this with their parents or anyone you dont want to watch two or three graphic sex scenes with. I was like ooh a psychological thriller, my mum loves psychologica thrillers! i learned fhe hard way that the 15 rating was generous.

starting off with set! this film has some truly great set designs. so incredibly 2012 if that makes any sense to anyone but me. the ones that particularly stand out to me are as followsss:

-the bathtub scene, oh my goodness it looks perfect. the petals, the colours. wow this movie uses colour so well it really does, the reds pop so much.

-Lilicos apartment in general honestly. i adore the giant rosary hanging from her mirror and just AHHHH its so perfect

-the podium near the end. this is so different to alot of the sets that are sort of poorly lit and crowded. its so empty in an unnerving way, and the fact there are so many microphones and cameras for just lilico stood alone at the front its just so perfect for this scene it put you on edge

-this is just a comment on the scene in general but the shop window where she cries and gets rained on and yadda yadda yadda. beautiful scene in a depressing kind of way, the way the lights make the rain appear red and gold is so nice

SPEAKING OF CAMERAS woweeeee this movie uses camera flashes and sounds really well. dont get me wrong lilico is crazy and most of the things she does i HOPE most people wouldnt do, but the way they often hyperbolise how loud amd bright the cameras are really makes you think wow id go crazy too. near the beginning she says “everytime the shutter clicks its like my brain is melting out my ears” (may not be exactly what she says but you get the idea) and honestly she might be right about that.

COSTUMESSSS okay wow. my favourites have to be her final outfit when it is revealed she is still alive. the eyepatch? ate. the dress? incredible. what i said before about the REDSSS! red is just her colour.

anyway now some stuff about the actual movie and not just the aesthetics. i spent alot of it feeling so so bad for Hada. But then hada just continued to do her bidding and at the end of the day, if she had quit, what would lilico even have been able to do about it? Hada is aware lilico is nothing without her so why not just leave? so then i kind of stopped feeling quite so bad. i think a sane person would quit once it got to acid throwing territory.

Plot wise i think its great, i do think that this movie would not be made the same now, because a key part of the story is that once people find out about her surgery, they all hate her, which i suppose does happen but not really on the same level. these days its become the default that a celebrity has had plastic surgery and its a suprise if they HAVENT, but also i wouldnt know if celebrity culture and plastic surgery are the same in japan as they are here so maybe this hasnt changed as much there

when lilico stabbed her eye onstage my first thought was “well would that even kill her?”. but then i thought “its a movie. it looked good for the scene that way, movies arent always accurate” and guess what. she wasnt dead. my second thought was “why was there no security at a such a huge press event? why did no one do anything when she pulled out the knife? why did no one move a muscle when she stabbed herself or even when she fell?” but i guess because the scene with the feathers wouldnt have looked so good. which is a good enough answer for me.

i was slightly confused to what her plans were at the end because she revealed the fact the was alive to kozue but where was she going to go from there? just go back into her career like nothing happened? how the hell is that going to work? i guess she isnt the most foreward thinker but still. i loved this ending but it left me with alot of questions, but i suppose they didnt need to be answered. also this movie was seriously long which i loved but if it had gone on for any longer my mother would have gone to bed.

this is a poorly organised review i know, but i wanted to get my first post out the way, in the future i will plan and organise! but anyway. i live this movie and i seriously recommend but also am sorry if you read this before watching because you got alot of it spoilt.

-GRZLY

[aangtheairbender]

This is what I mean with the cookie-cutter perfect main protagonist. We fell in love with those characters because they had flaws like us, but managed to evolve and grow in a positiv way that both benefitted themselves and the others in their life.

I want to see a characters that is like me. That has faults and sides that aren't some attraktive; but can show with hard work and a change of both heart and mindset- are able to accomplish the things they set out to do.

Having perfect characters from the starts, doesn't really do much for a show. Why should I follow the "growth" and progress of a character that is already at the goal.

I'm also so against the way tv production make fictional character. They make them spotless. Everything is practically perfect and yet, people finds way to complain about them. We need characters that can grow and people needs to realise that showing bad or negative traits in a character is important for the story building and for the audience. Showing bad traits and how to overcome them is a good thing. If you want a generation that isnt sexist (in this case), you don't show a character that is not. You show what they do and say to overcome that hurdle.

Even as a child, when I first watched ATLA, I was never unsure that sokka was out of line to mock Katara in that way or that is was childish of him to not accept that the kyoshi warriors were all young women that captured them. But it was still important to see that growth in him, because I knew that were negative traits and a bad mindset to have towards women; I wanted to see him overcome it and be better person.

This is why i think "wokeness" ruins remakes and new tv shows. Because, people just can't handle very "human" faults in character. We see this with every Disney remake. With new shows for young adults. Every line and every point of progress is basically spoon fed to the audience, soi there wont the any interpatation of what is wrong and what is right.

I just think we need dynamic characters that clearly has sides to them that every person can relate to. I mean, is sokka is a "problematic character"....why not just drop Iroh and Zuko that literally was hunting the avatar to kill/capture him. But they wont do that, because then the movie doesn't have a conflict and you droop two of the most likes character. It just doesn't make sense in my eyes.

We need characters with faults. I think if you are either scared that you or your close ones (children etc) are going to be influenced by watching a character like sokka; maybe you don't have the maturity to make you own morals stance and shouldn't watch a show like that.

Tv shows and movies are there to place your morals for you. If you can't pick what's right and what's wrong between being a sexist and not; you shouldn't watch a show like that. If it upset you that much, the solution isn't to get rid of those traits. It is to not watch it.

Also, I think it's wrong to remove Katara's more emphatic and sympatic sides in the name of "modern feminism". I hate when film producers do that. They want strong females, so they give them the traits of toxic masculinity. When Katara's motherly sides was never a weakness for her. It made her strong and it made her fight for people she cared about.

That is just mu thoughts. I'm never really for the remake of things. I don't really think it does any good and nobody likes them, it seems like. Why not make new plots and stories. Like they could have made a film out of the comics or something. I don't think I will see the movie, just because I don't the necessity of having it made and because I will literally be watching new characters just with the same name.

Just read that the live action Avatar the Last Airbender is making Sokka less misogynistic which I think is actually a poor choice

Part of what made Sokka a good and interesting character was seeing him grow from a boy who often insulted women into a man who regularly drank his respect women juice

We need to allow people to be shitty and yet grow into better people and Sokka was a good example of that because he was generally still likeable as a character overall, even when he was being kind of a dick

Giving him the chance to learn and grow as a person was part of what made him a well rounded character and to remove that is likely to make him a flatter character overall

[winderlylandchime]

2/2 Emmett just popped up on screen with that black eyeliner look ‘OKAY EMMETT! LOOK AT HIM! This might be the only good part of this fucking episode’ Em/Ted tell Brian he must be sad over the break up ‘of course he’s sad! And i am too! Finally someone acknowledges his feelings! (Brian says he’s not devastated and theyre not sorry) you know he might be onto something there besides that one little lie. Why is Emmett being passive aggressive towards Brian about Blondie? Bri Bri isnt gonna be happy about Mike and Ben. Fuck them both. This is partly their fault’ And we are now at the Lindsay dinner scene ‘what the actual fucking fuck is happening this season?! Did i have a fucking stroke? What the fuck is happening?! SEE I TOLD YOU HER MOM IS A BITCH’ And we are at the second worst scene aka Brian/Mikey ‘Brian! And he’s drunk. Fuck you Ben! He has every right to want some answers. CALL HIM OUT BRIAN! FINALLY! Whats wrong with enjoying clubbing at 30…..5? TELL HIM BRIAN! EXACTLY BRIAN! HE WAS PERFECTLY HAPPY! Yes, he was happy! What the fuck would you know Mike?! Oh Mike is still upset because Brian never told him he loves him in that way?! (Mikey says Justin left because of Brian) *gasp* what the fuck? (Mikey says who wouldnt) *bigger gasp* WHAT? (It shows Brian’s face) you can tell mike is the last person he thought would say that. Punch him again please. He looks completely broken(It shows Justin) *even bigger gasp* oh i just lost a very tiny bit of love for him because why would you allow him to say all that? What the fuck? *looks at me with teary eyes* why would they say that to him? Who would write such horrible things? Why is everyone okay with people talking that way to him’ Lindsay comes on ‘oh get lost with your bad haircut! I need Brian to make sure he’s okay’ ‘BRIAN! Ignore what Mike said, he doesn’t know anything. (It shows Brandon getting head on the dance floor) HA HA he’s getting kicked out. Fuck you baywatch’ Ben shows up on screen ‘i will pay to never see Ben and Mike again’ and we are at the scene with Jen/Justin and his loft(?) ‘This is an infection waiting to happen. I MISSED JEN! He wants to live here?! (Justin says jen wasnt happy when he moved in with brian) but now they are best friends and that’s all that matters. EXACTLY JEN I ALSO WISH THEY WORK IT OUT! And they will! So he is fully aware of everything Brian did for him but it somehow isnt love? And he still allowed Mike to say all that to him?’ Justin says thats not love it’s sacrifice *long pause* ‘damn it, i hate that he’s right BUT Blondie’s change came out of fucking nowhere this season and Brian’s change doesn’t count cause clearly writers are on drugs.’ And the Brian/Brandon scene is up ‘fuck off Baywatch. HE IS THE HOTTEST GUY! THATS RIGHT! Were? Brian hit him with the stick, i am begging you! Baywatch, on your best day, you are still less hot than Brian on his worst. Theyre gonna bet? Im confused (Mikey pops up on screen) man, fuck you’ ‘i dont wanna sound rude but why is the show political again? Cant we focus on Brian and Justin? I get it was real life cause I remember that…kinda..but we kinda did this already’ and the Britin scene is up again ‘BRIAN! JUSTIN! Please make up! Im begging you. (Brian says hes not rage and justin looks away) okay but why does everyone expect him to save the world all the time? (Brian asks if Justin is okay) no, he isnt! He lives in a dump! Hepatitis C waiting to happen!’ *he pauses the episode after justin says he has to go and they just look at each other and he puts his cast to his face* ‘look at them! Look how theyre looking at each other! LOOK AT BRIANS FACE! That is not a person who is okay. He looks broken.’ *you are my sunshine starts playing and he immediately gets teary eyed* ‘DO THEY THINK THIS IS A FUCKING JOKE?! HES HIS SUNSHINE AND THEY TOOK HIM AWAY! WHAT THE FUCK DID I JUST WATCH?!’ He then looked at me and just went ‘i can’t continue this shit if they dont get back together in the next episode. I cant do this, man.’ And then he got up and went outside

Sure Brian's not devastated. I mean he does just want Justin to be happy even if it's at his expense but also god forbid he even think about what he wants (in terms of a relationship, obviously when it comes to material possessions Brian is in the Donna and Tom camp of "treat yo'self.")

His commentary about the Brian/Mikey scene is completely and totally correct. It is such a heartbreaking scene. And yet everyone can look at Brian and somehow still believe he has no heart and that it cannot break.

Jen defending Brian this season is everything! I am glad we get that AT LEAST.

Blondie’s change came out of fucking nowhere this season and Brian’s change doesn’t count cause clearly writers are on drugs. <- I need that on a t shirt, thank you.

OHHHH AND BROTHER'S HEART IS BROKEN with that last scene. I am so sorry.

[teeto-peteto]

Question: Has there ever been a champion that you've wanted to like, but due to one reason or another, gameplay, design, voice performance, it just couldn't get all the way? Does that make sense?

augh a lot of them sadly.

Briar is the most recent one, i already adressed it in a recent post. I dont like they just made her anime highschool girl shaped, i think her design would have been stronger is she was uncanny skinny, it would fit better on her 'failed experiment with terrible hunger' concept and its a lost opportunity to make a character creepy and unsettling as Fiddlesticks was on its release. Im very bothered by her body type (wich is not bad but you know, repetitive), and if your team picks her its an insta loose so let me tell you its also not funny to play with one, i dont think she's well designed in the abilities department. I tried to like her because well, she's ''''''unusual'''''', but the type of unusualness that turns boring after a few days and then you just realize that she's just another pretty girl with Patrick Star personality.

aside from that i think i have opinions that most of the community would highly dissagree on so, sorry.

Irelia's rework didnt stick good on me. And i wanted to like her very badly but there's things that i just dont like on her that make me go 'eh' and play or think about another toplaner. Aside from making all of her skins exactly the same (you know, exact hair lenght just put like buns or other minor additions to the hair, the exact same dress piece, etc). I appreciate the rework in the artistic department but... I think her old blade was way more interesting that what she has going on right now, i understand why her blades are like this now, resembling the floating stones and all the 'power of nature and flow' that Ionia has around... but, i just dont like it. Her new lines are an improvement though, i cant really remember any lines from the old Irelia so, it's interesting how she gets to talk about her family, war, etc. One thing that bugs me the most is the Ice blade Irelia splashart... You know exactly what im talking about. I just cannot wrap my head around it. Actually imagine going to the artist and telling them 'Hey we need this new splashart for this Irelia skin, but like enhance her ass the most cause fans really loved it' ...bruh.

I know its a unpopular opinion and that she is a fan favourite and anyone could stab my throat if i say it but... I cant stand Akali. Like, at all. And i desperately tried to like her, i tried to like her on K/DA but it never works out. I tried playing her trying to somewhat bond and understand her but it doesnt work out. Look, original Akali wasnt good. I admit it, she was a copy and paste of Jade from Mortal Kombat. But the rework... It hurted me. I just couldnt understand why did they make her so... bratty, so 'pick me' type of girl, this kind of 'im rebel blehhhh' kind of person... Wich isnt bad in essence but, they made her so utterly exaggerated that it annoys me. I dont understand why they made her fall off of the Kinkou that badly and make her relationship with Shen this father-bratty daughter that rolls her eyes everytime he talks it makes me want to peel my skin with my nails. Her model update was definetly a glow up that im thankful for and she looks amazing, but... she is a pick me girl. She's the 'im not like the other girls' 'im not like my mom' 'im not like the other girls in ionia who believe in balance' and it hurts. There's a lot of positive changes on her i appreciate and i applaud, i just decide not to test it on my own because i know i wont enjoy it. I tried liking her on K/DA cause WELL at least she's interacting with 3 more people (4 with Seraphine) without being a literal child in rabies. But yeah, didnt quite work, she's better, but i dont want her near me. Her glowup is good, her emotion on the lines is amazing, but her personality kicks my ass badly. And i just hate the way Riot makes all her skins exactly the same just like Irelia, almost always the same type of dress piece (literally no matter if she's wearing a suit like crime city, a witchy design like coven... its literally the same shit) and the same type of haircut, copy and pasted but with different colours.

If anything, i could never take Sona seriously, her voice lines were bad already and her update just kept being bad or even worse. I try to like her but again, sexualized and basic. Nidalee is in the same category, playing her its fun but would you sacrifice that to hear sexual innuendos every 10 seconds?

woah noticed how the champions i mentioned are female? gee i wonder why....

am i the 'mysoginistic' one because i dont like the female champions? Or are Riot the mysoginistic ones because they think making champion splasharts with special enhance on their bodies and private parts is okay and that they can make them cold-hearted emotionless specially women because making them feel a bit of emotion makes them believe that it doesnt fit what they think feminism is about but yet they decide to give them bratty/unhinged rebelious personalities so they can raise the cocks of the disgusting male fanbase so they can go 'oh bbygirl is a feisty one what a brat' and buy skins and then produce/pay for porn of these characters? hmmm....

[the1975attheirverybest]

Sorry its a bit long but...

Honestly, people will always dig up the past whether thats a few months ago or several years ago. No one besides the ones involved will know why rina decided to do it when she did whether right or wrong. It does seem a little strange but like stated multiple times before no one knows what happened behind closed doors.

Does matty need to learn that words have an affect? Yes. But he does not deserve the hate and threats hes been receiving or has received over all. Yes people are allowed to be upset and yes Its easy to say yes we are human, we make mistakes because we do. Being a frontman i think he at this point knows what comes with that considering they've been together for this long.

Honestly staying silent, letting it die down a bit i think will be a bit beneficial. Like stated before i dont think he needs to do a general apology because yes that can seem insincere to some and maybe forced by management. You can't take back what was said, and not saying he should change how he act/ what he does but to at least acknowledge it and move on.

There is no sense on harping on the past. We make mistakes and we learn. As far as questioning if he is who we really think he is. I think hes been pretty willing to show us who he is. He isnt a bad person, he does make some bad decisions in the public eye but then again like he tried to show with the magnifying glass, who likes to live with everyone watching their every move, every sentence waiting to just tear them apart. I love giving a benefit of a doubt and will defend him (do every day at work even though my co worker says he wouldnt like me since im asian) because not everything is black and white as media likes to portray

Do i feel bad for Matty, of course. He's become ( as well as the rest of the band) something i (as well as thousands of other fans) rely on to make me smile when in a bad mood or get me in a good mindset to go into work or take on whatever the world may throw at me each day i wake up. But Matty knows whats best for him as well as the band and only time will tell whats going to be next. Overall hopefully it dies down quickly and EVERYBODY can move on from this situation and the podcast and whatever he might had said prior.

Yeah, regardless of the context, I trust that Matty knows the difference between criticism and reactionary drama. And he’s a good enough person to know how badly to feel about it without letting it consume him and without turning the whole thing into a conversation about how he’s a victim or whatever.

On the whole, it’s gonna feel bad. It’s a shit situation of course he’s gonna feel shitty. And he SHOULD. But I think he’ll be alright. And he’s handled it the best that he could so far.

It’ll all be alright. Everything feels weird in this specific moment, but he’s gonna be fine and the fandom is going to be fine.

[kusundei]

its just everything is . attached w a sort of guilt. a doubt. i could probably work through it like i did in the beginning but this is also just incredibly different. because there was no reason for me to be so doubtful then. it truly was just a self hatred and it went away as easily as it did then because of how we were moving and i didnt even really have anything to condemn myself over. now i do. i really really do. i can shake off the feeling momentarily but it just keeps coming back and i mean its okay? im supposed to feel like this i just. truly am just hoping jt doesnt stick to me forever. i just feel too selfish if i get over it now and this quickly. of course i’ll always sort of be repenting over jt but j dont want him to think that i think everything is okay bdcause im acting normal. because jt rlly isnt okay and im not giving myself the benefit of the doubt. id just rather do everything in my power to make it better for him. i would truly do anything and give up anything for the sake of him and i think this has also just festered some old ideals of mine. trying to remain less self sacrificial as i did before and less overbearing and desperate and burdening but its all sort of just coming back to me. that i truly have taken hundreds of steps back from where i was before. ir isnt even an issue within the relationship entirely - like i know . i knowww what i did and yeah it did change something for us and holy fuck do i feel horrible about it because j hate. hatehatehate change especially change that takes me back to a worse position but its just an issue within myself where i. failed again. i try sososo hard each time to be different. to change something , to be as small as possible , as helpful as possible , to help and not to hurt but god forbid. hurt people hurt people? but even then that saying doesnt help me at all. nothing really lessens the blow if you truly consider it because it is just all the same and im just learning to acknowledge my faults without trying to sugarcoat it

i dont know. i just. really really hate myself. but its not like this is a new feeling? its just worse because its related to the fact that i hurt the one person i never wanted to hurt but jts always like that isnt it? i will always. find a way. to hurt someone. because unfortunately at my core thats just kind of who i am. i can try as hard as i want to prove to other people and to myself that im not the way that i am but deep down i do still acknowledge it. the reason why id always rather hurt myself over and over again because why should it be at the cost of others? and even now ive just done it again. again again and again. but no what cycle? there is no cycle? surely? im just perpetuating something that isnt true. hell and w my doubts as well i mean like im . realistic. i know he probably does still mean it its just the fact that its probably less is whats bad. but then again of course that was bound to happen? its just upsetting. i just feel so hypocritical. whenever he says things like that i so desperately want to believe him like i did before but i just cant get over myself and jts honestly sickening. i mean i just. idk. its happening exactly how i said earlier how if im alone too long i’ll just start thinking ab it again but im trying to remember today as well. i felt better after a while. could look him in the eyes again. felt sorta okay and better ab touching him and being physical i suppose. started talking more and was joking w him and being. normal. its just at moments during that id think about it again and be like? who am i? why am i being normal again? but i kept just trying to ignore jt. sorta just a refusing tk let myself think before i do anything which is honestly the same thing as me being delirious and preferring it that way i judt wish i could get it all to stop or something. idk im just running in circles. i just feel so. bittersweet. looking at things still. that i miss him and that i wish he was here and i want to be around him all the time and talk to him and etcetcetc. i truly ammm just. not letting myself get over it because im being stubborn but i also still just feel condemned. of course not by him jusr truly by myself? idk i jusf. im normal. but who am i. ? i still probably wont let myself be. myself. for a bit. just feels like too much. even in private i do feel guilty just looking at things. being like ohhh my boyfriend ^_^ like. god. i still have a boyfriend? but thats too condemning im. getting that ache again. idk ive flung the hoodie to the other side of the bed because i still feel too bad about it. wont go through my photo gallery wont sleep to his voice till i am. more deserving. i suppose. till i know for sure its okay and i condemn myself a little less

iiiii. am. normal. i mean? as normal as i’ll ever be.? its just like. yeah no i feel better sort of but thats also the bad part. oh bcuz who am i.? im trying again not to condemn myself over it but i cant exactly help feeling bad whenever iiii feel okay again. who am i to be normal??? to act like everything js okay and nothing happened?? its just. incredibly selfish. half the reason i keep just kind of distracting myself is because if i am alone for too long j will start thinking about it and i’ll be evil but isnt that whats supposed to be happening anyway? im not relinquished of anything. he can be as kind and sweet as he wants because he truly is just at his core but he is. way too kind to me when i am so incredibly undeserving.

ive always sort of felt undeserving of everything regarding him but i chose to look past it because i am better. i am a good person i am okay and i can be better and im not condemned to my past but idk. this just reminds me that no i am still selfish and i am still not . really a good person. it really has just kind of brought the attachment style and allll my doubts back into the forefront of my mind ljke it was before. like when we first started dating and i was horrified. didnt believe anything he said really but i worked through it its just like? why am i doubting him now? i was the one who hurt him so why is it making me? falter?

i mean im just asking a rhetorical question because i know. iiii always know. its just that i truly dont believe he means any of it anymore because j huuurt him. the one thing thats always sort of bothered me is when he deemed me perfect, which is such a nice and flattering sentiment but i think it weighed down pn me this feeling that i HAD to be perfect when i knew deep down i had already made such a bad mistake. which is why it was so scary? i knew how he was going to take jt and j tried to just accept it and work through it and j AM. i am i am i am but i keep going back and forth on how i want to deal with this. do i keep acting like im okay and everything is okay and live like that? because it would work and it would probably help him so much more than me focusing on how much i hate myself now but i just feel. horrible if i do do that. but is that me self sabotaging again by truly preferring to condemn myself and let this kill me? like it did last time?

i dont know. again it kind of has just reminded me of last time. but the issue with this compared to how it was with jd is that that issue w jd happened about a year and a half into our relationship and the worst part? it ruined it. it festered there and grew more and more till it killed both me and her because it stuck. ajax and i arent even at 2 months yet and jve already? done? something? that detrimental? its just like. i need to change something. find something. DO something different. because i know what i did with jd last time and jm trying not to repeat a cycle. i’ll be different ill try ill do everything i can because iii cant. as selfish as it is i cant let. this . go. i cant let HIM go either and j feel horrible about it again but i just i dont know

its just so weird because. its all came back. and its so unhelpful. because i KNOW hes still going through it and he doesnt believe me and things r just different but why is it also different for me? i should just be focused on him. doing the most i can to make him feel better and really emphasize that nothing has changed in me especially regarding how much i love him. its just i also keep just feeling. so. so guilty. it comes and goes in waves again. it truly is just the fact that hes right. because if i do love you this much then why would i do that to you? why did i do that? and my only answer is just that i am selfish. because i didnt know how to keep my mouth shut and i made such a personal thing out to be just another thing i could just say because iiiii trust them. but HE doesnt know them. j told her for what? because i needed her to know? she didnt need to know that. even if i was as shocked as i was and still processing it and wanted to talk about it i shouldve kept it to myself and processed it silently. instead i put him last and ignored the matter of fact that this would affect him badly just because iiiiii wanted to talk about it . i was selfish and put myself before him and this always happens when i do so. truly why dont i ever learn? what is wrong with me?? i keep kind of forgetting about it all and then it comes back. then goes then leaves. what sucks is truly that . im so doubtful again. its not that i dont trust him and i dont believe him its just that i hate myself. i hate myself all over again and its making me unable to believe that i deserve any of this AGAIN. that no. hes lying to me. he doesnt mean it hes just saying that? ive hurt him too much . because theres no way he just has no negative feelings toward me when i was the one who did that. and let alone if he IS telling the truth then thats worse because why am i spared? why am i given the benefit of the doubt when he has vocalized that if it was anyone else he wouldve hated them? so why is jt different for me? you SHOULD hate me. thats the problem.

[gwaaaaar]

fma word vomit!1! Mostly a rant bc i have been rewatching it and thinking about things. Fma critical but i am ranting from a place of i genuinely want better for a media i like. I am a person of color and these are my thoughts personally, feel free to disagree.

Iirc, hiromu arakawa wanted fma to be a criticism on ainu colonization as she had ainu family and wanted to pay her respects to them. Which is Awesome in concept, i think its important to want to make something out of compassion and respect for others. I think she had good intentions when creating the base morals of her story.

(Edit, apparently shes yamato and not ainu, i only heard that she was distant ainu from an interview or something but yeah thats probably wrong so sorry abt that)

Heres where the problem kicks in.

Sometimes she does it poorly, really poorly. "Ignorance isnt a sin" but what happens when that ignorance hurts people?

Fma is in the end a story about redemption and humanity. It is a very idealistic /optimistic view of the world. And sometimes that wide-eyed optimism is blind to reality.

Enter the entirety of the amestrian government. One thing i HATE HATE HATE, is the fact that the white characters are given more sympathy than scar, a colored man who had his race brutally genocided by those characters. Roy and gang do feel bad for what theyd done, theyd felt bad about their war crimes their murders their sins everything. He himself says scar was justified in his violence. And edward, a 15 yo twerp was like "thAts nO exCuSe."

This is where the optimism comes in. "Murder is murder! All murder is bad!" Thats a genocide victim. Of course when scar goes after literal children and decides to solve all his problems with violence, thats when hes losing it. That should be disconnected from the whole government corruption bit.

And then winry. Winry comes in, cries her eyes out and shes the victim. Scar went through worse quite literally. And we dont see him get afforded that. And in a way, it feels like white woman tears. I can understand why winrys upset but jesus have some empathy would ya?

The main problem i think, is how little ishvalan characters there are, there isnt enough to have a full story. There isnt enough to see their pov. Its just roy and the gang and armstrong. And doesnt olivier get mad at alex at one point for not participating in the genocide? Stan alex for not wanting to kill people and backing out, wish other characters could say the same huh?

Maes. Maes. Grips him. Maes.

He doesnt give a shit about the ishvalans, what he was a loving dad but does he ever care abt his literal war crimes? Probably not. He only cares about roy.

In the end its an idealistic world where cops would actually work against the system. There always was something unsettling about the way the goverment worked and i think its because it follows the lines of "not all cops are bad!" Which, which isnt true.

Cops are bad because they promote and enable a system that was corrupt in the first place.

FMA technically goes against the grain with that, because the "cop" characters do go against the government. I think its important to have an ideal to work towards. I think its important to have positive examples, and fiction is a playground. Its a literal fantasy to get a corrupt government overthrown. But having that hope somewhere, may be good. Because at least we can hope for a better future. Roy and his gang work towards a future where they would get sentenced guilty which is a good thing i wont deny. I think its good that they fight for that.

Im not here to talk about that.

This combined with the fact that only white characters have a truly active presence in overthrowing the government (besides scar vs bradley that was awesome and very good), it just feels, unsettling.

Its like making a movie abt the civil war only to have white people star in it ignoring the black people that did work for their liberation.

(If thats an uncalled for comparison let me know ^^ i can edit it, its just the closest i can think of)

White characters and their emotions are always getting prioritized over colored ones and its alarming.

Then theres the whole if you work hard youll get something in exchange.

Hahahahha if only it really was like that for the majority of minorities hm? The world really would be a better place. 2003 fma you actually did something with that.

I dont think fma is entirely bad, it does good things sometimes! And i appreciate the message it tries to portray, i just think it has its priorities askew sometimes...

[soft-boi-eli]

OMG CAN I REQUEST CC!PHILZA INTRODUCING HIS ADOPTED EMO CHILD TO THE REST OF THE SBI/DSMP

Gender neutral pls they/them

Of course! I've been having a bit of shortages on ideas. So this is so fucking welcomed.

Anyways

Father CC!Philza x Emo! Reader

Pronouns:they/them

Summary:your old parents gave you up as a teen, overflowing you with emotions, causing depression, mood swings, and quite a bit of anxiety. When you got adopted by a man and a lady,both seemingly very kind and understanding. You felt happy. They didnt expect the sleepy bois to come and visit so soon.

Tw:anxiety attacks, mention of depression, loving clothes (not a tw but damn I sometimes miss my old fashion sense.), mention of trauma, swearing!

A huge new family

They dont blame their biological family. They knew that they were being overwhelming. Slowly shifting into a state of mind where fluffy black and colored hair was their favorite. Their outfits became more extravagant and their makeup took a turn for the darker. But they didnt have to put them up for adoption.

About a year in and out of foster families, a few months in an orphanage, then one more foster family. It was official. They were the new child of philza.

Your life got better. Both of them accepted your choice of clothes and makeup, even supported it!

They helped with everything in the first few weeks. Giving you space, letting you know that they were there. But you nor phil knew that three boys were heading down to visit.

So when you answered the door to see three faces demanding philza minecraft and one just looking awkward. They were also changing about him coming and join them you felt panic flood through you. Slamming the door on their face you held near your chest.

Your uneven breathing was heard by your father and he was quick to scoop you away from the door and have kristin answer the door.

He was sitting next to you hand lightly rubbing your shoulder and he guided you through the panic attack. "That's it. In through the nose. Hold it for a few second. Breathe out." His voice was calm.

It took less time to calm you down then you've ever had. "There ya go mate. Just keep breathing." He kept coaching you through you panic attack.

Kristen let the four in with their promise of keeping calm. Your shaking form brought major concern to the two older ones and confusion to the two younger ones. "(Y/n) I want to introduce you to the four behind us. Technoblade, wilbur, tommy, and tubbo. They are really good friends of mine." Nodding lightly you sat there, not wanting to turn because if you did the panic would strike harder. Remembering what happened before you parents left you.

A huge group of people basically shunned your for your choices and didnt want to take you in because 'trash like you' wasnt accepted in the family. But these two were different. Supporting you with your choices. How different were their friends? "Hey I think you shirt is cool! Who's on it?" A slightly hyper voice broke through the silence. " black veil brides." It was quite but a start. "Cool! So their a band right? What kind of songs?" The brown haired teen was trying to communicate with you. "Uhm. Rock." It had started small but you opened up to the teens. They were about you age and they didnt bash what you decided to like. The two older ones hung out with phil and Kristen. You three hung out in your room which was kind of softer then your appearance. It was to reflect a bit deeper into you. Bookshelves, a desk, reading corner, and a bed. Not fully knowing what to put in there.

But you, tommy, and tubbo were almost the best of friends when they had to leave. Techno and Wilbur it took a bit. After the two teens left you had came out of your room, no makeup, hair had all products removed, and your clothes changed from Jean's and a black veiled brides shirt to a black tee shirt, grey sweat pants, with a book in hand.

Before sleeping you just chilled in the living room, reading while basking in the presence of your adoptive parents. You did not expect wilbur and techno to still be there.

Plopping down on the couch next to phil you opened your book and tried to zone out, to get engulfed into the book. Nope. Two sets of eyes just watching you.

"So you like poems?" The book you were reading was a massive collection of poems. Looking up to the two on the couch you nodded lightly.

Looking back down you felt nervous. "Small talk is awkward." Looking up to the brown haired guy with an American accent you nodded. "Same." Once more you looked down at your book. You already had issues focusing but you tried to work though it. "What kind of poems are you favorite?" You sat there for a second. Trying to think of something that catches your attention.

"Mainly ones about trauma. It reminds me I'm not the only one in the word that went through something I have. It just makes it more interesting when I can relate." It was true. Sometimes the poems you liked ring a little to close to home.

"Good choice. It does really intrigue the audience when they can relate." Nodding you closed your book. "Especially when you relate. It's a must for me. Other wise I get turned away from it and just cant focus. But if I like it then I am just dead set on that poem."

You and techno bonded over poems and wilbur brought up some songs. "So what is you song preference?" "Hollywood undead, black veil brides, other then that its random. If I like the song it's in my playlist." With no other preferences with music other then it had to sound good to you there was honestly no judgement for other people's taste in music. There were little treasures from almost all genres.

For a while you talked about poems and songs. It honestly helped you feel safer with them. They didnt care about what you found intriguing. Or why. You even went on a rant and there was no care. They just listened.

But sadly they had to leave. Bit they promised that they would visit more. They were like the brothers you never had.

"So I see that you were able to talk to all of them." Nodding to your father figure you smiled "they were nice. Honestly. I cant wait to see them again."

He found joy in you wanting to hang out with his friends/technically children too.

Now meet the rest of the dream smp. It was very fast. Meeting almost all of them at the same time.

Phil was streaming and no one except for the sleepy bois knew about you. So you walked into his stream, book in hand and sat on the couch behind his set up. You liked having another person on the room. You just hated being alone. It gave you really bad thoughts. "Who's that behind you phil?" A random donation read out. Phil looking behind himself saw you in the corner reading and you normally did. "Ah that's my child. They like to have company. So sometimes they come in here to read." "Wait you have a child?! Since when?" The voice made you jump. Your book fell out of your hands and you looked at your father's screen. A green man with a weird white blob for a skin on minecraft. "Yeah. I took a break to pick them up from the orphanage." All hell broke loose. You ran while phil answered questions. You were not dealing with that. No way. Nuh uh. Nada. Zip. Zilch. Not today satan. It took phil bribing you with a trip to hot topic to get you to come back in. I mean hey you get to score a few shirts and hats. Might as well.

Meeting the server wasbt too bad. But the questions were weird. You didnt answer the ones you were uncomfortable about and they didnt care. Your boundries were up. And when tommy, tubbo, willbur, and techno revealed they knew of you they were yelled at. It was funny. Watching people say they should of said something. But it resulted in alot of compliments and Phil's chat loving you.

You were now the older sibling of the chat. Why? Cause chat said so.

When you come in from now on the chat is chanting for you. Just "(y/n)!" Over and over.

Your life? Crazy. But it became a bit better after you were living with your new parents. It was heaven.

I'm sorry if its awkward I'm not good at introductions. And I am tis but a sleep deprived human. I need sleep and so do you have a nice day and once more I'm sorry if this isnt up to what you wanted.

[imsociallyanxiousgetoverit]

Im finally watching The Owl House instead of just seeing spoilers on Tumblr so Im gonna live-post my reactions cuz Holy shit do I have some things to say right now-

1. Camila sounds nothing like I imagined

2. LUZ DONT THROW BOOKS AWAY WHAT THE FUCK

3. Eda sounds nothing like I thought????

4. Luz… baby… you didn’t see the door with a giant eye and- ya know what- not worth it

5. Why is Eda not sus about a human? I am definitely missing something

6. Is Alex Hirsch the voice for the guard?

7. Why hand come off?????

8. Luz is self aware. This is good.

9. HOOTY??????? THE FUCK????

10. Luz! Don’t just grab people and creatures!

11. Wait- have I been mispronouncing Luz’ name? I thought it was Luhz not Looz

12. Eda! Blackmail and manipulation isn’t cool!

13. by the way both Earth and Boiling Isles conforming places are so disgusting like the fuck

14. Luz I love you and im concerned by your lax reaction to this new world

15. the warden is disgusting

16. h- thats not how physics work??? how are the doors opening???

17. Eda you’re great for protecting the child first

18. Luz is so cool for rebellion tho

Done! I think Im gonna rewatch each episode again when I don’t pay attention enough so I can write these. Hard to remember my questions if I pay attention too hard but ya know I wanna express how I feel too

1. wait these people are overreacting sometimes. the snakes and spiders? yeah absolutely valid to run. The sausages and eyelids???? Y’all overreacting. I mean the wasted food sucks but like its obviously just sausages guys. The eyelid thing is just something at least one kid does every year and its gross but not scream and run worthy. These people are so rude. At least the principal and Camila are concerned about Luz cuz of her seemingly not recognizing what is and isnt real vs just being dicks about her hobbies. It could be much worse in that way. Also Camila worrying about Luz’ lack of friends is good, too. Some kids do fine alone, but most really do need a support system other than family.

(ugh why is the next line down here thats so annoying)

2. Boiling Isles is like- lawless??? Clearly the warden gets away with his crazy arrests (kinda like Warden from Danny Phantom) cuz he’s just a dick. Like how is the guy selling person-eating icecream allowed but a fanfic writer isnt???? Like this is all clearly a reference to queerness cuz like fanfic doesn’t bother anyone else unless you see it out whilst that icecream could absolutely hurt some random civilian. The shit queer people used to and still get in trouble for with no valid reason- this also could be referencing race as well cuz it is disgusting how many POC are arrested or hurt due to plain racism rather than justice by law.

3. oh my godex I have been saying Luz’ name wrong! I thought it was Luhz! Is it Looz cuz its short for Lucida? Also the fact Eda thinks she’s clever for a human makes me worry everyone in Boiling Isles will think Luz is dumb just because of her species which is hella speciest and yeah im worried

4. ): giraffes are cool. Eda why

5. I kinda hate Hooty not gonna lie. Also ??? Eda why you leave your stuff outside ???

6. I just realized that the Conformitorium may actually be a proper prison that just has too many lax laws. Also how tf did does Luz open and close the door????

7. Luz’ willingness to just trust Eda is concerning. Also the BK crown is funny. Eda is a softie

8. oh the doors are opened normally itd just hurt ouch. Is the scene of them falling done by that Baxter dude cuz its kinda smooth af

9. I really hope Luz’ speech means something to kids and teens. It feels cringely bad to me but im also literally 20 so its not meant for me

10. Luz… you cant just offer up your services for ANYTHING! Standards! Boundaries! Her age is showing here. (what is her age? is she like 12?)

11. That photo thing is absolutely real. Some people think its a dramatic movie thing but Ive done it genuinely. Who had the sleeping bag? Eda or Luz? Also love her phone case. Cannot imagine sleeping without a blanket.

Properly done this time! I think I’ll watch the next one once through then ask questions though cuz this took far too long. Ill remember the questions eventually.