#UHHH WAIT WAIT I CAN EXPLAIN I SWEAR

[disposal-blueeee]

halloween thing i drew for an art trade with @cherry-207 ! she asked for edgar and scri dressed as angel and devil . you can see her part here !

edgar vargas belongs to jhonen vasquez

scriabin belongs to @zarla-s

[mixed-messages]

Chip and Dip

Lando Norris x snowboarder!reader

Author’s Note: In honor of where I live getting around 11 inches (28 cm) of snow over two days, here’s a little social media au about an Olympic snowboarder, who also happens to be sponsored by Monster Energy. Just like Lando. None of these IG stories are real. I made them with my need for detail

I haven’t done an smau in so long, so please bear with me and the fact it doesn’t really have a plot

General Notes: no use of yn, a nickname is used instead. no faceclaim, but there’s some skin showing in a few images! swearing, she/her pronouns used, yc is your country but you can pretend it’s just a snowboarding team or smth!

Liked by mclaren, lando, chipnflip, and 567,832 others

monsterenergy Two of our favorite snowboarders will be heading out with a few other Monster Energy athletes for a snowy getaway. Stay tuned for clips, tricks, and videos

Tagged: chloekim, chipnflip

user02 stfuuuuuuu omg omg who are the other athletes???

user78 CHIP AND CHLOE MY FAVE DUO 👹

user34 wait can someone please explain why she goes by chip???

↳ chipfan omg it’s so stupid (affectionately). years ago she was a guest on a youtube channel (forget which one) and she tried to do a trick and fucking ATE it (not the good ate) and chipped her front tooth. everyone just calls her chip now

↳ user04 it was that one trickshot channel

chipnflip let’s get ittttt 🏂 Liked by author

chloekim So excited! We’ll have to teach these skiers how to snowboard 🥱 Liked by author

user18 I SEE MCLAREN LIKED. PLSSSSS TELL ME LANDOSCAR WILL BE THERE

↳ monsterenergy we can neither confirm nor deny 👀

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Liked by mclaren, chipnflip, oscarpiastri, and 1.3m others

lando the boys on the slopes

Tagged: oscarpiastri, patriciooward, nolansiegel, monsterenergy

user167 PATO IS THERE TOO? IM GONNA COMBUST

user16 is it just mclaren and the two snowboarders?? 🏃🏻‍♀���

↳ monsterenergy We can assure you there are more than just the five of them! There are ten in total!

user74 Not them becoming a clique 😭

user55 have they taught you guys snowboarding yet???

↳ chipnflip I fear we haven’t been able to teach them yet! We wanted to get to know each other first! Hopefully tomorrow 🤞

↳ lando @.chipnflip If it’s like anything today, I’m worried I’m gonna become scared of the snow

↳ user67 LANDO WHAT HAPPENED TODAY?

↳ lando @.user67 snowballs to the face 😔💔

user178 so you’re telling me 10 athletes had a snowball fight and no one posted about it???

↳ chipnflip I gotchu!

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Liked by nolansiegel, patriciooward, lando, and 678,438 others

chipnflip The snowball fight that occurred between 10 professional athletes last night. To our managers, no one got injured 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️

Tagged: lando, chloekim, patriciooward, and 6 others

lando Speak for yourself 👎🏻👎🏻

↳ chipnflip dude, be so for real, it wasn’t even packing snow. it was as light as a feather

↳ lando MATE YOU LIFT

user137 LANDO GETTING HIT IN THE FACE JQICNDOW BYEEE

oscarpiastri As Lando’s teammate, I must say, I do believe there was a small piece of ice in one of the snowballs

↳ chipnflip Ope— uhhh I was unaware of that one

ycnowboarding We’d like to formally apologize to McLaren for any harm our athlete may have caused to your very expensive driver

↳ mclaren we accept the apology. Liked by author

↳ lando says WHO?

user33 not her bullying Lando 2 days after they met 😭😭

↳ user77 and him clapping back 🏃🏼‍♀️

user88 OFFICIAL YC SNOWBOARDING ACCOUNT APOLOGIZING IS SENDING ME

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12,458 likes

f1gossipupdates Some of Chip’s recent IG stories! There are lots of theories after Monster Energy uploaded a video of the winter getaway/vacation. While other athletes were being interviewed and Chip or Lando could be seen in the background, the other was always close behind. Leading some fans to suggest that there might be something going on between the two of them.

user009 omg can’t two people just be friends?? even if they’re more than friends should we even care??

hater17 i get a weird vibe from her. idk. i dont like her

↳ hater62 no bc i totally agree. there’s something about her that bugs me and i can’t put my finger on it. i hope she doesn’t take advantage of lando 💔

↳ user72 “take advantage of lando” 🥱 puhhh-lease you’re saying that like she’s not an incredibly successful athlete that has 3 Olympic gold medals and is as well known, if not more, than lando

user90 does anyone know why she rarely shows her face??? I wanna know what she looks like so badly

↳ user108 I mean… did you not watch the video monster put out?? Her face is clearly in that 😭😭

user779 chip and lando this, chip and lando that. but we should talk about the sibling-like banter between her and pato. they’re kind of iconic 💔😔

↳ user028 PLEASE. when Pato was “bullying” her and then she just… pushed him off his snowmobile??? 😭😭 and then Nolan and Chloe started to chant “fight, fight, fight” ???

hater59 she’s actually so annoying. she can’t stay away from any of them and it’s so cringe

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Liked by chipnflip, chloekim, maxverstappen, and 1.6m others

lando Truly an awesome experience! Huge thank you to @.monsterenergy for hosting this event, will forever remember it!

Tagged: chipnflip, oscarpiastri, chloekim, patriciooward, and 5 others

annika.overtomorrow It was great meeting everyone!! We’ll have to do something again! Liked by author.

↳ lando gotta get the gang back together sometime soon!

↳ user2 THE GANG. ARE THEY ALL BESTIES NOW??!!

user14 SEVENTH SLIDE. SEVENTH SLIDE

chloekim You weren’t a horrible snowboarder, I’ll give you that.

↳ lando You honor me greatly

user85 call me crazy, but is that chip in the seventh slide???

↳ user23 I was thinking the same thing but she doesn’t wear those types of goggles 💔💔

chipnflip Will forever laugh at your hair in pics 1 and 4 🫵🏻🤣

↳ lando You’re just jealous 🥱🥱

↳ chipnflip whatever helps you sleep at night!!

user65 Still obsessed with the fact Nolan casually pulled 10 McLaren lego sets out of his suitcase

↳ user17 No bc I cackled when that happened

↳ nolansiegel what can I say? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I come prepared

hater9 Praying seventh slide isn’t… her. Was literally hard for me to watch the videos they posted bc of how obnoxious I found her. like wtf even is that nickname???

↳ user56 that’s not very girls-girl of you like your bio says. Liked by author

↳ user56 LANDO?????

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Liked by lando, nolansiegel, maxfewtrell, and 578,491 others

chipnflip Was definitely a fun time! Met so many new people and was able to catch up with some longtime friends :,) My runs weren’t too bad either 🥱🥱

user92 max f in the likes????

↳ user10 RIGHHHHTTT???

chloekim she’s an icon, she’s a legend, and she is the moment 😍

↳ chipnflip i’m gonna kiss u

↳ lando @chipnflip eh? 🤨

↳ user6 lando 💀

patriciooward It was great meeting you! Even if you did kick me off of a snowmobile!

↳ chipnflip booooo 👎 you’re making me sound aggressive

↳ patriciooward @chipnflip Good!

↳ user65 helpppo i love their friendship

oscarpiastri Pretty sure Lily has been attempting to subtly ask to meet you

↳ chipnflip Oh my gosh that’s so sweet 😭😭 text me!!

lando bet i could do the trick on the second slide

↳ chipnflip omg I bet you could 🤩🤩 bet I could win a grand prix in less than 110 races

↳ lando @chipnflip low blow :(

hater8 gosh, she’s so fucking rude.

↳ user14 girl, I think she was joking Liked by author

↳ hater8 but how are we supposed to know that??

↳ user14 as long as lando knew it was a joke why does it matter???

↳ lando I knew it was a joke. I was sitting right next to her.

user54 hold. lando and chip. hanging out. together. alone???? 👀

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+ stories from lando and chip during the trip

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okay, so I’m thinking of doing a part 2, maybe with some writing. just because I think the ending to this as of now is a little bland and I want chip and lando to do the classic soft launch photos (I have some cute ones).

Please let me know if you’d like another part!

[itzy-bitsy-spidey]

"Old enemies and spilled coffee pt.4"

Or "Something made a hole in my backyard pt 4"

Shadow the hedghog x reader (platonic)

Notes: I know I´m taking my time to actually make Shadow, well, do something, but we are right there, I swear. As always, if you want to be on the taglist leave a comment, and if you just want to leave a comment I don´t mind either.

Btw, idk if this is obvious but I am NOT proofreading anything of what I'm writing. Enjoy!

Part 1. Part 2. Part 3. Part 5.

You had already taken your alien-ish friend out of the box and laid it down on your bed so that it would be more comfortable. Once again you had doubted yourself over how comfortable it could possibly be, but as long as it couldn´t act in a way that showed uncomformity then it would have to deal with what it was given.

You had agreed to have lunch at your uncle´s house the next day. But in the meantime you had texted your aunt Maddie to ask her to come over to the house you were staying in under the pretense that you would share some pastries and talk about life for a while.

And so you sat on the couch waiting for time to pass and hoping that Maddie would be there soon. And, just like an angel sent from heaven, the doorbell rang and you sprinted to open the door.

On the other side awaited your lovely aunt with a huge smile on her face which reflected your own excitement. Hugs that lasted a little more than necessary and greetings were exchanged, you invited her inside and prepared tea, all while she talked about how much you had grown, how much she had missed you, etc.

"So how´s life? Any cute work friend I should know about or something?" Of course that would be between the questions, it was an aunt´s classic.

"No, everything has been rather boring actually, I mean, I was working at the salon back at home last month because they were short on staff, but truthfully? The gossip was the only entretaining part" You answered as you stirred your coffee, she had chosen chamomille tea.

"Uhhh, does that mean you can braid my hair now?" She asked with a smile as she sipped her tea and proceded to add more sugar to it.

That was one of the reasons you loved Maddie so much (not the sugar part) but the fact that she never juged your style of working, you were a freelance artist, so all the time you weren´t actively working on a project you would spend doing some minor jobs. Usually people would be all over you telling you to ´get a real job´ or stuff like that, but never Maddie, she was your ride or die, you could tell her that you were gonna climb the Everest and she would cheer you from the bottom.

That was why it came so handy that she was a vet. She probably wouldn´t even question the fact that you had brought a weirdly shaped animal all the way across the state. She trusted you, and you trusted her.

"Maddie, there´s something you should know, and I need you to remain calm and trust me, okay?"

She looked at you for a few seconds, her expression getting serious, and as she looked you dead into your eyes she asked softly:

"Is it that you are gay?"

"What! No!"

"OH, sorry, I thought this was like you getting out of the closet or..."

"No, I didn´t mean that I´m not gay, that was not what I was going to tell you!"

"Wait, so you are gay then?"

"Does it matter?"

"No, I just thought that was the topic we were discussing"

At some point between the exchange you both had broken into laughter, and somehow half of your coffe laid then spilled onto the table.

"I-I am so confused hahaha" she tried to speak in between laughs, but you could see how she was struggling to breathe, laugh and talk at the same time.

While still in your happy state you cleaned up the coffee puddle with a rag and took in a few breaths to relax. Once there was air in your lungs once more, and she had calmed down as well, you continued.

"I brought an... animal with me from home, and it kind of seems to be in like a coma? I would appreciate it if you took a look at it." You explained.

"You brought an animal in a coma all the way to Green Hill? That could be very dangerous for it" She scolded you slightly as she got up from her seat to follow you to the bedroom.

"I know, but it´s like nothing I had ever seen before, and I only trust you for this"

"Does this have something to do with your mother not letting you keep pets? Because you are an adult, you can have pets if you take care of them"

You stood in front of the door and looked at her a little bit as if she had lost her mind.

"No, that´s not it, but you have to promise that you won´t say a word to nobody"

She answered an "I promise" under her breath and you opened the door slowly, allowing her into the room. Maddie didn´t scream, neither did she look back at you as she entered the room. You stayed a little behind, just waiting for some type of reaction.

Maybe if you had been by her side you would have seen the way she frowned, as every little detail on the creature in front of her fell in place perfectly with the description that Sonic, her son, had given her about the hedghog who tried to kill her husband.

She knew it was a dangerous being, but laying down on that bed among the fluffy pillows he just looked... so calm.

Silence reigned the room for a few moments, and for some reason you felt that as if the air had become thick. She approached Shadow and lifted his limbs one by one, making sure that none of his bones were broken, even squeezing a little harder than necesary. And then, Maddie turned around with a smile, walked up to you, ruffled your hair, told you that it was unlikely that the thing would be asleep for longer than three days and left with the excuse of having to buy groceries.

And so, after the sound of the front door closing, as you were looking the way your aunt had left you were once more on your own.

And, if you hadn´t turned back around, you would have probably missed the sight of red eyes fluttering open.

Taglist: @boogiemansbitch @vxllys @whoisgami @baby-bloos @sapphireravensworld

[peachy-wolfhard]

just like heaven

Domestic life lawl, toge’s is mainly texting, sorry if u dont like the cure im goth and didnt know what other band to put

Includes in order: Megumi Fushiguro, Toge Inumaki, Yuta Okkotsu, Noritoshi Kamo

Warnings: food mention, halloween in noritoshi’s, one swear word, skeleton in the bath drinking a martini

It's finally starting to cool down. The once humid and sticky house was now cool and chilly, the rain outside growing louder and louder. The occasional lightning strike and thunder boom sends you cuddling closer and closer to your boyfriend.

“If you get any closer you're gonna be in my skin,” he chuckles, wrapping his arms around you. 

“What do you want for dinner? I was thinking of ordering since we're being lazy today,” Megumi stretches his arms out, back arching off the bed and then flopping down with a groan.

“Mmm, fries,” wrapping yourself around him again as he orders dinner.

“Who’s gonna get it?” “Rock, paper scissors?” “sweet”

As you two play, best two out of three, the delivery driver knocks on the door. Taking the loss, Megumi opens the door.

----

If you have anything u want from da store lemme know pookie :3 lub u

Uhhh….hmmmmm.

Those noodles i rlly like and popcorn plzzzz :3 lub u too

WAIT!!!!! lemme get uhhhh those rlly fat apples

How many fat ass apples light of my life?

Oml i love u sm erm like 2 ! thank u babylub

I love U more. Be back soon !

“Stinky boy, I'm home!” you call out, setting the small amount of groceries down. Toge hops down the stairs, three at a time, his stomps echoing throughout the house.

“HONEY!” he shouts as he lunges for you, tackling you to the ground.

“Did you miss me?” “Salmon,” he hums nuzzling into your arm.

----

“When have you EVER wore this?” you shout from the closet, lifting up a gaudy hot pink and yellow Hawaiian shirt. Your boyfriend gets up from the floor, leaping over the massive ‘donate’ pile.

“OH! We cant get rid of this one,” Yuta explains, taking the shirt from your hand to look at fondly.

“This was the shirt Toge got me when we went on vacation!”

Yuta throws it in the ‘keep’ pile. Yuta goes back to his spot organizing the under the bed drawers. Turning on the TV, you start to play your joint playlist. Tossing Yuta the remote so he can change the song. Shuffling through the many songs, he stops on The Cure. Getting up Yuta joins you in the closet, asking to dance.

----

It was finally fall, despite being a month early you and your boyfriend were decorating for Halloween. Noritoshi thought it was a little early for halloween celebrations however.

“Love, the leaves aren't even falling yet. Don't you think we should wait a bit?" he calls, setting the ceramic light-up cat down.

“The calendar says it's fall so the Halloween decorations are going up,” calling back, setting the dancing Hello Kitty zombie in the entryway. Noritoshi playfully rolls his eyes and continues grabbing random items. Opening one of the many small boxes and unwrapping it, he reveals a small skeleton in a bathtub drinking a martini.

“Do we need to put him out this year? It’s uncomfortable seeing him when I'm taking a shower,” he tries to say, laughing every time he looks down at the skeleton.

[clovesnz]

don’t really know how to write smut (finally edited this)

it's very heterosexual and also there is no actual spelled out sneezing. lots of nosefucky and snotfuckery. very self inserty for me. lots of uhhh dry humping? idk guys.

“Oh my god you can’t just sit there in front of me like that my horny brain is going to actually fucking explode”

He sits at the edge of the bed. She is leaned against the headboard, blushing in spite of herself as she watches him sniffle and scrunch his nose up and down, over and over, in an obvious exaggeration of what are, to be fair, very real allergy symptoms. He lets out a long, labored sniff and scrubs at his nose vigorously.

“What? What am I doing?”

His eyes are twinkling, mischievous. He’s watching her practically squirm. She can't take her eyes off his nose. It’s glowing pink from all the rubbing and irritation, and as she watches, he pinches it between two fingers and locks eyes with her, one eyebrow cocked in amusement, and wrings his hand back and fourth, producing an obnoxious, messy squelching noise.

“Stopppp oh my god you fucking evil bastard” 

“Whatt why am I evil?” 

He puts on an ironic grin of feighned innocence, eyes wide, lip slightly curled. 

“I can’t help it. It’s just…” another sniff. Another theatrical scrub.

“...my nose”

“Oh my GOD no stop it”

She’s waving her hands in his direction, feebly attempting to shew his hands off of his nose. He really is laughing at her now, the fucking asshole, and she starts to laugh too. But he’s not gonna get away with it. She scoots towards him on the bed. They’re both completely cracking up now, and between breaths of laughter she struggles to grab hold of his hands, still going at his nose. 

"You’re so…mean this is not…not…okay just…get...no no no, uh-uh… there”

She’s half on top of him, and has managed after a bit of a struggle to get his hands pinned behind his back, away from his itching nose. There. No more teasing. They are both grinning silly at each other, their faces close. Close enough that she can see a little dampness around his nostrils. But just as she’s going to kiss him, arms still holding him firmly in place, his face changes. His upper brow wrinkles, and he looks genuinely panicked enough that she loosens her grip in concern. She is about to ask what’s wrong, when he tilts his head up and takes in a sudden breath, and she realizes, completely entranced, that he’s fighting the urge to sneeze. 

His teasing facade has completely disappeared, replaced with a frantic sort of embarrassed concern.

“Shit, I swear this wasn’t…I didn’t…”

It’s like she sees it in slow motion. He brings one hand to her side to brace himself, leans the other way, takes two more wavering breaths, and then lets out a harsh, wet sneeze into the back of his wrist. She feels her stomach drop, down, a sharp ache that pangs harder when he lowers his hand to reveal two strings of clear snot running from his nose. Holy shit. Her head rushes, and her heart races, and she just…stares, frozen.

“Sorry, does that make it un-sexy?”

He cringes down at his hand, face full of the self disgust of someone who's body has made a mess that they can’t control.

“What, no! I…sorry,”  

She doesn’t know how to explain, but she also doesn’t want him feeling that way, because god, she would watch him do that all day if she could. She tries anyways,

“It got a little too real and my brain kinda short-circiuted”

But he just looks more concerned, for her now instead of himself. Fuck why can’t she get the words out right.

“Shit, I’m sorry. Too real how?" He looks down at his hand again, deciding that must be the culprit.

“Here I’ll go get something to -”

He makes to slide off the bed and grab the tissues on his desk, but she tugs him back to her by his shirt.

“No! No wait, please.” 

He turns for her, and lets her take his hands, looking back down, eyes searching. She takes a calming breath, but before she can try to make words out of the paralyzing waves of desire coursing through her, another drip of snot slides out of his left nostril, and he winces, “Ugh, sorry,” and lets go of her and reaches a hand to swipe at it. But now her brain is working enough to send signals to her body, at least, and she stops his arm, firm but more gently than when he was doing it to tease her.

“...no.”

He obeys, and lets her pull him down to her level again. He’s holding her gaze, curious. Waiting. For her to explain, to communicate. Her whole body is shaking, just a little.

“Just…”

She reaches one hand up and cups his cheek for a moment, letting her thumb graze the very edge of the sparkling wetness covering his upper lip. He accepts the touch, leaning into it,  but his eyes are still searching.

“Wh-”

Before he can ask, she lifts her other hand, and gently, methodically, the way someone might delicately run their finger over a beautiful piece of jewelry, touches the pooling snot with the tip of her pointer finger. She breathes in and shudders, her whole body zinging and tingling at the feeling of it on her fingers, and that’s when she can see it click for him.

“....oh.”

She takes another shuddering breath. She wants to do more, wants to swipe at his nose, to cover her fingers in his snot, to make him blow into them, to have it in her mouth, but it’s all so much and it’s so…it’s so odd, it’s got to be so add, to him, and now she’s too embarrassed to keep going but also too captivated to stop and she drops her hand a lets out a whimper of frustration that is maybe actually just neediness and he looks at her, just as enthralled. He’s not laughing anymore, he is all attention, his own breaths picking up pace with hers.

“Yeah?”

He’s asking her without asking. Yeah, you like me like this? You like all of it?

“....um. Yeah.”

His eyes sparkle, fiery and exited

“Oh, fuck, okay. What do you…what do you want me to do?”

It’s such an open-ended question, and a dozen deeply held fantasies, the kinds of things she never thought she'd ask of anyone, flood through her mind. But the thought of speaking to them is so scary, it’s so ingrained in her head that she’ll gross him out, that he’ll find it all too weird, and she feels that rising panic again, and it makes her want to stop all of this and curl up in a ball and hide.

“I’m..oh my god no I’m embarrassed”

She breaks away and falls back onto the bed, covering her face defensively, her cheeks prickling and burning in mortification. But he just follows, propping himself up over her, and some of her embarrassment vanishes as he lowers himself against her, because holy shit, apparently it’s not just her who is wildy, embarrassingly turned on right now. He leans down to one of her ears, and she feels the dampness of his upper lip pressed, purposefully, almost nuzzled, against her cheek as he whispers, not teasing this time but tantalizing, serious, like he’s daring her:

“Stop being embarrassed”

And it’s too much, he’s too good like this, she can’t…she wants it too badly. She groans and rocks into him, and when he gasps a little in response she catches his breath in her lips. She feels her whole body tingle and sparkle as she realizes she can taste the bit of salt still on his lips. She can’t help it - she whines, and thrusts against him again, and kisses him deeper, and steals herself and lets herself nip at his upper lip, and god when she does it she feels it, like really feels it, the snot smeared onto her own lip now. And she wants to do it again, wants it in her mouth, wants to have it, his cute red nose and his snot, so she kisses him there, right under his nose, and she feels him smile beneath her but he doesn’t flinch away, and it’s not enough so she does it again, and when he brings her back to his mouth it's encouraging, and kind of messy, and he breaks away by running kisses down her chin until his dripping nose is pressed up against her mouth. Now she’s not thinking, she’s not thinking at all she’s just wanting and so she nips at the tip of his nose and oh god she likes it so much, so she does it again but lets her tongue feel it too, and he just nuzzles into it so she lets her mouth explore. Nipping and his nostrils, gently squeezing them together with her teeth, running her tongue up his septum and around one nostril and then the other, peppering his upper lip with generous, licking kisses until all the snot there is gone, so she follows it’s path, slipping her tongue ever so slightly up to one nostril. She feels his nose twitch as she does it, and it sends a thrill through her body so she does it more, flicking it back and fourth at the opening of it. He gasps,

“You’re gonna make me…oh fuck I’m…”

And he leans to the side, disengaging to let out a forceful sneeze into his elbow. He stays turned away, frozen with his face turned upwards, building to another one.

“Hey - ”

She reaches for his crooked elbow, gently bringing it down from his face, and he catches her meaning and turns back to her right as it hits him, pitching forward into her chest with the force of the sneeze that spills out of him. Strings of snot wet the front of her t-shirt and she feels her hips thrust reactively at the pleasure of it.

“Fuck me, oh my sweetheart…” she coos, and he whimpers a little at the pet name and lets out snuffling little squeek as she presses into him harder, bold enough now to tenderly, adoringly swipe at the snot running from his twitching nose. 

“Oh..fuck, oh my darling, can you do that again?”

And he does, bending forward into her again with the force of another sneeze, and holy shit she doesn’t know if her cunt can take it she's aching so badly but he’s so preoccupied, hitching and blinking and twitching, and when he starts getting close again he leans into her again but she doesn’t want to stop watching this time so she asks,

“Hey…look at me”

And he does, obedient, meeting her gaze and keeping it until his eyes are forced shut and he sneezes, barely turning away this time, misting her face in spittle and sniffling helplessly at the aftermath. 

“Bless you”

She gasps, and his face is already crumpling again but he keeps himself level with her, and this time the spray is thicker and hits her face and god the way his whole body tenses and releases and his cock presses against her with the force of it and if he doesn’t start touching her she going to have to start touching herself.

“Uhhnn, bless you. Fuck, I-I can’t…this is…fuck”

He grins at her loss of composure, teasing again even as he fights back another sneeze, and she gasps and cries out a little as he moves against her, wrapping her legs around his waist. He laughs a little,

“Y-yeah?”

She just nods, yes, thrusting harder to emphasize the point, and god this is stupid why don’t they have their fucking clothes off already, and he’s still sniffling and hitching but he props himself on one arm and reaches to the button of her corduroy jeans and she can’t bare to wait for him to fumble with them one handed so undoes them herself and and slides them off, and he groans a little between hitches when he slides his hand under the waistband of her boxers and lets out a breath, like he's relieved to finally be there. She sucks in a breath as he begins to he tease the opening of her cunt, infuriatingly. She whines in protest and he obliges quickly, slipping two fingers inside of her and pulsing softly against her, all the while still hitching and blinking, building up to sneeze again, and she realizes after a few moments, in complete amazement, that he’s going at her harder the closer he gets to sneezing. She gasps,

“Keep… keep doing that”

And he does, faster and faster and then pulling up with his whole arm as his body shakes with it, spraying her in snot and spit and she cries out and begs, cause he’s got her so close and she needs more but he’s slowed again. He's slowed and she’ll have to wait, have to wait for the tickle to built up because that’s how this game works now. But two can play at that, so she reaches for the back of his neck, a little forceful in her want but he lets her, and she flicks her tongue against the opening of his nostril, fast, like she did before, and he matches the rhythm of it with his fingers. It’s getting faster, and she’s so fucking close with him on her and inside of her and under her tongue and she’s breathing so heavily it’s hard to keep her tongue moving but she does until he pulls back, only slightly, still going at her faster than her fucking vibrator, and his eyes flutter shut and oh god she wants it, wants to feel it, to hear it to see it to taste it and she does, right as she hits her peak, screaming out as he erupts once more, the spray landing against her open mouth, and she grabs for him desperately, ravenously, and kisses him, deep and sticky as she rides out her orgasm on his fingers.

**************

Epilogue: he pulls off her shirt and blows his nose in it and then she makes him do the same thing with his own shirt and then his pants and then her underwear and then she gets on top of him and fucks him while he sneezes all over himself but she stops before he cums and finishes him off with her hands so that she can see him make that much more of a mess of himself and then she takes him to the shower to get cleaned off and the sneezing has died down but they fuck again in the shower anyways and then she lovingly rubs soothing lotion around his irritated nostrils and forces him to take the Claratin she bought him because the whole thing started when he ran out and forgot to buy more. The end.

**************

anyways so yeah. sorrry for the weird formatting. ya girl used to read a novel every week back in high school but still doesn't know how to structure dialogue. if u read this i love you <333

[fanfictiongirlie]

Twilight: Your World -Request-

Parings: Embry Call x Reader

Request Prompt: (Requested by anon)

Any ideas for Embry fics? What about him and his imprint found out they are going to have twins, but maybe the imprint isn’t sure she wants to be pulled into the wolf stuff..angst and sweet ending plsssss!

Rating: General Audiences

Warnings: Swearing, Emetophobia warning (Some words and the act happening), fighting, no beta!

Words: 2,463

This was a requested work! I had so much fun writing this, I may have gotten really into the argument. Anyways, thanks for requesting anon, hope it's to your liking!

Completed One Shot

You and Embry had met in High School and dated for a while, and then he became a wolf, and truthfully you avoided him for a while, the idea that wolves were real. It was too much to handle. 

A few years later when you were both twenty you got back together, he explained imprinting and that you were his. And truly you loved him, but his world scared you. And now, you both lived in a small cabin together, married.

Embry found you sitting on the couch with a large blanket around you, the last few days had been rough, you were feeling a little out of it, sickness mostly. He climbed onto the couch and pulled you close holding you against his chest whilst he rested his chin on your head. 

"Hey" You whisper, sighing contently at his warmth. 

"How are you feeling?" He murmurs, pressing a short kiss to your hair.

"A little better, it's fine in the evenings, it's the mornings and during the days I feel awful" I explain. Embray frowned a little, and held you a little closer. 

"You haven't been sick, have you?" He asks quietly. 

"Uhhh, yesterday, noon but that was it" You answer quietly, your eyes now closed whilst your head rested on his arm. "Let's go to bed"

Embry smiled and scooped you up, holding you easily in his arms. You giggled softly and held onto him, snuggling him close as he carries you to your bedroom. 

The next day, Embry was gone by morning, off patrolling with the pack, you swallowed down the annoyance and anxiety you felt and tried to not think about it, burying your thoughts deep down. Your day had been relatively normal until noon came around, where you found yourself fleeing to the bathroom to empty the contents of your stomach. You cough and splutter into the toilet bowl, groaning. 

You clean yourself up and decide it was time to do the thing you had been dreading, the thing at the back of your mind the entire time you had been sick. You rooted through the draw in the bathroom, finding the pregnancy test you usually kept for emergencies. 

The test felt like forever, you waited with your heart pounding, and when it was time you looked at the test, and it was positive, you weren't shocked. You didn't know how you felt. 

You sat on the couch for the rest of the day, with your knees close up to your chest, tears staining your cheeks as you waited for Embry to get home. You didn't know how long you sat like that, so when Embry walked in the door, you had no idea the time. He noticed you crying and seconds later he was sat on the couch next to you. 

"What's wrong?" He asks. 

You move slightly, grabbing the test from your pocket and then you held it out to him. Not trusting your voice right this second. You watched as his eyes widened. 

"You're pregnant?" He asks, he sounded hopeful, it broke your heart. But you weren't sure why. You nodded, tears still coming from your eyes. 

Embry was quiet for a moment, you could tell his mind was racing. Finally, he wrapped an arm around you, pulling you in close. 

"Is...its this a good thing?" He murmurs, his voice a little softer than usual. 

"I thought so.. at first" You whisper, your voice cracking slightly. You couldn't look him in the eyes. 

"You thought so, at first?" He asks, he had moved his hand to stroke your cheek gently. 

"I don't want to hurt your feelings" You mumble. 

"Baby, what is it? You can tell me"

You waited for a moment, trying to figure out how to tell him this without hurting his feelings, but there wasn't a way, so you just said it. 

"I don't want a wolf baby"

"You...you don't?" He asks quietly, you could hear the hurt in his tone. 

"I mean...having a family with you, I love that, you're my forever...But Em, I can barely handle you being a wolf, I don't want to watch my child grow up and become one" You say quietly, the words hurting you as you say them, so you know they were hurting him. It was the truth, you were his imprint, he was truly your forever, but the wolves...the supernatural world, it was never something you wanted. 

Embry was quiet, trying to process. And then he sighed. 

"...I guess I get that"

"I just..I don't know" You mutter. 

The silence between you both was tense, the anxiety and pain was evident in the air, Embry moved slightly, no longer was his arm around you, he still sat next to you, and turned his body to face you more. 

"So...what do we do now?" He asks quietly. 

You take a deep breath, and answer. 

"Nothing, we're having a baby Embry, we have to suck it up because I don't get to have a choice in this stupid wolfy world of yours"

You hadn't realised the words until you said them, it was like word vomit, you couldn't stop it, and after you saw the look on his face and felt terrible. Embry winced at your words, you could tell he was trying to not get annoyed. 

"...Is that really what you think of me?" He asks. 

"N-no..I mean..kind of? I hate that you're a wolf, I'm sorry, but I do...I don't want to know about supernatural things, I wanted a normal life" You say truthfully, you hated hurting him, but you needed to get these feelings out. Embry stood up, pacing for a moment before looking back at you. 

"Then why did you...stay with me? Why did you want to be together if you hated what I was so much?"

"Because I love you...the human part of you" You say quietly, you hated yourself for disliking his wolf side, but that was normal. Normal people didn't like scary things like wolves. 

Embry looked away from you, you could tell he was angry now. 

"I understand you didn't want this. Hell, I didn't really expect it either. But you...you don't get to hate me for something I didn't choose" He grumbles. 

"I never said I hated you!" You answered, your voice a little louder than before. 

"Then what the hell was that comment 'I don't really like what you are'?" He snapped. 

"Okay, yeah I get that sounds bad. But Em, come on, wolves, vampires? It just feels like too much" You answer a slight whimper in your voice. 

Embry huffed, his irritation growing. 

"Yeah it does, doesn't it? It's a lot, but it's my life! These things are a part of me, whether you like it or not-" He pauses, sighing, he takes a deep breath, obviously trying to calm down. "Whether you like it or not, you're a part of it too now"

"I don't want to be a part of it!" You snapped. 

"Well, it's a little too late for that, isn't it? You're pregnant with a werewolf's kid, this is your life now" He answers, his voice stern. 

"Yeah..."You mutter, not knowing what to say anymore. You hated fighting, you knew he hated fighting, and this was the worst argument you had ever had. 

"I can't believe you" He mumbles, running his hand through his hair. He looked frustrated and hurt. He was sharking a little, and you knew that meant one thing, yet you stood up and took a step closer to him. 

"Embry" You whisper. 

He was stood stiffly, his fists clenched by his sides. He noticed you step closer to him so he stepped further away. 

"I...I'm sorry"

He laughed a little bitterly at your words. 

"Sorry? You're sorry?" He snapped, his voice got progressively more agitated as he spoke "You don't get to apologise for this, do you have any idea how it feels to know that the person you love hates such a big part of you?"

"I don't you...I didn't mean it like that...I hate...I hate that wolves are real, I hate that vampires are real" 

"You think I asked to be a werewolf? You think I wanted this curse? I deal with it, I always have and always with. And now I'm stuck with dealing with the fact that you, of all people, hate me!" He snaps. 

"No...I know you didn't, but neither did I.." You whisper. 

"Yeah, yeah...Neither did you.." A silence came between you again, the tension heavy. After a few moments, he spoke again, his voice strained. 

"I don't get it...Why did you stay with me? Why didn't you leave if you hate it so much?"

"Because I love you" You answer quietly. He was silent again for a moment. 

"How am I supposed to know that anymore...How do I know that will be enough? How do I know that when that kid is born, you won't hate them as much as you hate me?"

You sigh heavily thinking for a moment, this argument was getting worse, and you needed to get yourself out of it, not only for your safety from Embry's wolf side, but also the babies. Embry may be mad, but he'd never forgive himself if he hurt either of you. 

"I think...we both need to cool down" You say quietly "I'll be at my sisters tonight" 

You walked to the bedroom, not waiting for an answer from him, you packed a small bag and left the house, your sister only lived a short walk away so it didn't take long. 

However you couldn't sleep, it was dark outside now, and you hadn't stopped crying. You were mad at yourself, and hated that stupid argument, you wanted Embry. So stupidly you decided to walk home, and part of your walk to the cabin was through the woods. 

You knew it was a vampire, from it's red eyes, it was stalking towards you, smirking heavily. You whimpered pathetically and walked backwards until you hit a tree. You weren't far from the house, five minutes maybe? The vampire got closer, toying with you, so you started screaming, calling for Embry, hoping he would hear you. 

The vampire had it's hand around your throat now, holding you tight against the tree, you whimpered and choked a little. You closed your eyes, not knowing how to escape, but then the vampire was ripped away from you. You opened your eyes seeing Embry's wolf self ripping the vampire apart. You fall to the ground. You watched as Embry killed the vampire, easily. 

He disappears for a moment, a minute max and then his human form was walking to me, he wrapped his arms around me, and held me close. 

"Are you okay?"

You didn't answer him, tears falling from your eyes again as he held onto him, he scooped you up into his arms and started walking home. 

"I was so scared" You whispered against his chest. 

"I was terrified when I heard you...I thought I was going to be too late"

You didn't talk anymore until you get home, Embry takes you straight to the bedroom and place you on the bed, sitting close by you, still holding you. Your breathing was heavy, and your chest hurt. 

"Shh..I've got you, it's okay" He whispers. 

"I'm so sorry Embry" You whimper. 

"We were both being stupid"

"Yeah, we were...I'm sorry, it's just your world, it scares me..I don't want our baby getting hurt by a vampire, or becoming a wolf and hating themselves, or being in danger" You say quietly. 

"Do you...Do you even want this kid?" He asks, his voice breaks slightly. 

"I do...I'm sorry I made you feel like I didn't, I want a baby with you" You say, holding onto him a little tighter. 

"I'm sorry for everything I said, I love you" He says. 

"I just want us to be a nice normal family, but your wolf life, it does scare me Em. Everyday you go on your patrols I get so scared, what if you don't come home? I can't be left alone, not with a baby, I need you" You whisper. 

"I'll be careful, always...I promise you, nothing will happen to me" He promises, holding you a little tighter. You spend the night holding onto one another, crying a little, but no longer arguing. 

A few weeks later, Embry and you sat outside the Doctor's office, you had a little bump now and today it was time to find out the gender of the baby, and though still scared, you were beyond excited. 

Embry's hand was laced with yours, and his foot tapped impatiently. He was more anxious than you. 

"Patience" You remind him. He groans and leans back in his seat. 

"Yeah yeah. I know. It's just...this waiting is killing me" He said, squeezing your hand again. 

Finally your name was called and the two of you walked into the Doctor's office. You climbed onto the table and lifted your shirt, your little bump visible. 

"It's gender day" The Doctor said excitedly to you. The Doctor started pushing the wand over my stomach and then they turned to me "Sorry, genders day"

"Genders? As in plural?" You ask, thinking you had misheard them. 

"Plural, as in more?" Embry repeats. 

"Yes, twins, see look here" The Doctor says, pointing at the screen at the two little blops. Both yours and Embry's jaws dropped for a few moments. 

"T-twins. We're having twins..?" Embry choked out after a while, he was grinning like an idiot. 

"Yeah, Em...twins" You whisper, tears in your eyes. Embry then turns to you, a worried look on his face. 

"You're...you're happy, right? Even though it's twins?" He asks, a hesitant expression over his face. 

"Yeah I'm happy...I mean double scared about them being in your world, but I'm happy" You say quietly. 

"Don't worry okay? I'll...I'll keep them safe, and I'll keep them away from my world, I promise" Embry whispers to you. You smile, feeling as if you had heart eyes whilst you looked at him. 

"I love you" You whisper. 

"I love you, forever" He whispers back. You then turned back to the Doctor, who was smiling softly at the two of you. 

"So genders?" They ask, and you and Embry nod eagerly. 

"I hope it's two boys" Embry says grinning. 

"Or two girls?" You ask excitedly. 

The doctor moves their wand over your stomach again, moving around both blobs. 

"We can....looks like...two little girls" The doctor answers. Both you and Embry were speechless, but had silly grins on your lips. 

"Looks like your outnumbered" You say to Embry, giving him a playful grin. He responds with his own playful smirk, shaking his head a little. 

"Oh yeah, I'm in big trouble" 

[fandoms--fluff]

Shopping or Babysitting?

Flufftober, October 10th

Female vampire reader x Josie Saltzman x Hope Mikaelon x Lizzie Saltzman

Summary: You guys go shopping and you and Josie end up more like babysitters

Warnings: swearing, other than that just cute and funny and fluffy

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Why the hell does Alaric need all this shit again?" You groan while pushing a shopping cart around Bells grocery store.

"Something about a fire happening in the kitchen and burning all the food and the counters and cabinets, everything really" Josie answers, feeling the same way as you. She places a carton of blueberries in the cart.

"Ooh, we should get whipped cream" Lizzie says, walking over to the refrigerators. "It's not on the list" Josie calls after her twin.

"Wait, where's Hope?" You look around all the displays from where you're standing. Your eyes land on the auburn headed girl distracted by rearranging an end cap shelf of pancake mixes.

"You know what, how about you grab a box, and Lizzie, you can get one can of whipped cream" you sigh, calling out to them both. Josie looks at you with a confused look on her face.

Hope and lizzie come back with their item and place them in the cart beside eachother.

"Now, if you both don't get distracted and we get the hell out of here quickly, then I'll make vampire pancakes for all of us. Got it?" You explain and look at them as if they're children.

They both excitedly agree right away. "Good idea" Josie whispers to you and you nod your head, agreeing.

"What's next?" Hope asks. Josie looks at the list in her hand "uhhh, tortilla chips. Wow, now that I look at this list, it had the most random order" Josie answers and tilts the list over for you to see. "Huh, it does. Almost as if Jackass just wanted us out of his hair" you say as you turn the cart into the chip isle.

"You know he's my dad, right?" Josie says, trying not to chuckle at how you casually talk about him in such ways. "Oh, I know, but you've got to agree that he's a dick most of the time" you tell her, keeping a close eye on the other two teens in front of you both.

"Hey! Put those down, we're down here for tortilla chips, not any of those" you exclaim, making Josie look at what's in their arms. "How did you guys grab that much so fast?" Josie lightly chuckles. Lizze and Hope have their arms full of different chip bags. They have small pouts on their faces while you make them put the bags back on the shelves.

"Wait, do we still get the pancakes?" Lizzie asks when they walk back over to you and Josie. "On one condition" they both nod. "You each have to have on hand on the cart for the rest of the time we're here" you cross your arms.

"We're not five year olds!" Hope exclaims, Lizzie agreeing with her. "Do you guys want the pancakes? Yes? Then one hand on the buggy at all times" Josie raises an eyebrow.

"Fine" they both mumble, taking a hold of the cart on either side.

You guys walk out to your car with the shopping bags in your arms. Once you place everything in the trunk, Lizze and Hope start to have an argument. Over what? You and Josie have no idea.

"I'm starting to feel like more of a babysitter than a personal shopper now" you sigh. "Glad I'm not the only one" Josie closes the trunk. You open one of the back doors to the car. "Okay you two, shut up and get in or no pancakes and I mean it. And if you're really good during the forty minute drive, then maybe we can watch Harry Potter" you nod for ghem to get it.

"Okay, Mom" lizzie says jokingly, and Hope nods her head. They both climb in the back and start doing up their seat belts when you close the door.

"Remind me to never have kids" you groan. Josie chuckles, "Same here" she says, making you chuckle as well.

You both get in the car, and the drive back was surprisingly peaceful.

Once you get back, you guys bring all the groceries inside and to the slightly charred kitchen. "And you guys paid for it using the card I gave?" Alaric asks, stepping into the kitchen.

"Sure we did" you roll your eyes, sliding things onto a shelf in the fridge. "What did I say about compulsion" he grits his teeth.

"Oh fuck off about that, compulsion is way easier, plus no money was spent, you're saving money" you throw the credit card to him.

"Don't fall into the trap, Dad, we both know you'll lose" Josie says, closing one of the pantry doors. Alaric groans and leaves the four girls alone again.

"Hey! Why did you get to go against the rules and not get in trouble?" Hope asks from where her and lizzie are sitting on one of the counters. "Because I'm older then all of you, and Jackass" you answer them. "...fair enough" Hope mumbles.

"Pancakes?" Lizzie perks up. "Of course, you two weren't horrible, so it wasn't that bad" you get all of the ingredients and materials onto the counter you and Josie are standing at.

"All you guys have to do, is stay there and don't touch or try to help with anything" Josie says, getting a mixing spoon from a drawer. Hope and Lizzie can't cook for the life of them, so it's best to keep them far away as possible whenever you and/or Josie are cooking or baking.

"Alright, here you guys go" You and Josie hand Hope and Lizzie their plates, the opening credits of Harry Potter playing on the screen. "Thanks" they both say, already entranced into the movie.

The pancakes all have a smiley face out of blueberries, and vampire teeth made from the whipped cream. Something you annoyed Damon with until he gave up and then he started annoying Bonnje with eventually in the prison world. (Yes, you teased him endlessly when Bonnie told you about it).

"You know, we're a pretty good team" Josie sits beside you. You wrap am around her shoulders, your plate in your lap. "Hell yeah we are" you kiss her on the cheek, playfully.

"Gross" lizzie icks. "Yeah, we're right here" Hope swallows some pancake.

"Yep, never having kids" you mutter under your breath. Josie hears and chuckles, making you smirk.

[writing-rat]

Childhood Crush

Pairings: Pippa x Reader

Content: Pure fluff

Summary: You have had a crush on Pippa for years. You finally interact with her...

WC: 1154

You had known Pippa since she was 8. Well, she didn’t know you but you knew her. She was always hanging out with her friends and you never had the confidence to talk with her like that. You just admired from afar. You were happy enough with that… 

You were now 17 and doing your A-levels. You tried focusing in classes but couldn’t, especially when Pip was sitting in front of you. You always admired her from behind, writing down everything you could as quickly as possible. “Miss Y/N, Miss Fitz-Amobi, can we talk after class?” Mr award called as the bell rang. 

“Yea sir,” you spoke immediately, embarrassed. You thought you had been caught staring and would get in trouble.

“Of course,” Pip answered, smiling. Everyone soon exited the classroom, you packing up slowly as you wanted to delay. Pip was already at the front though, talking to him. You were soon there too, nerves hitting you like bricks. 

“What is your grade at?” Mr Ward asked. You immediately knew at that point it was about tutoring but with your crush.

“It’s a… 2 sir,” you answered. 

“Yours pip?” he asked though he already knew. 

“A 9!” She answered. “You want me to tutor Y/N?” she asked bluntly. 

“As smart as ever Pip. Yes, please. Are you ok with that?” he asked you.

“Yeah, of course,” you answered flustered. 

“You may go now,” he offered. Pip nodded and smiled as she left. “Go get her,” he stated to you once she was gone and you blushed. 

“What?” you asked.

“I assume you have bad grades because you admire her a lot since you don’t struggle in classes when she isn’t there,” he offered. You groaned. 

“I’ll see you later,” you spoke and left.

 

Pip was seemingly waiting outside for you, on her phone as she was furrowing her eyebrows. You stopped in your tracks, shocked. “Uhhh… new evidence?” you offered. “How’s your EPQ doing?” you added. Pip, in her own trance, jumped before she nodded. 

“It’s going well. I was hoping we could start today if that’s ok?” Pip offered. You nodded, still embarrassed Elliot knew of your crush.  She also didn’t say what the evidence was which was rightfully so. You could be a suspect for all you knew. 

“Where at and right now?” you asked. Pip nodded. 

“I was thinking my house? We can study in my room,” she offered. “I can drive you if you don’t have a car too,” she added. You were shocked but nodded. 

In the car, it was quite nice. You felt more relaxed there, Pip putting on her playlist as she hummed to herself. You, meanwhile, were gay panicking but didn’t say anything. She reached her place after 15 minutes and you both got out. “My room is the first door on the left,” she explained. You nodded as you walked inside, waiting for her as you didn’t know how to face her family without her. You could hear them inside the house. Pip was soon next to you. 

“As a warning, Josh can hear anything and everything now. He heard me swear once and got me in trouble,” she spoke, a soft smile on her face. 

“Ok, I’ll keep that in mind,” you chuckled, going inside with her. 

“Mom! Dad! Josh! I’m home,” she called out, the pittering pattering of paws running towards you, where a golden retriever jumped up onto Pip and knocked her down. 

“Welcome home, who is this?” her mom asked. 

“This is Y/N, I’m tutoring her now for history,” Pip explained, greeting the dog, who you heard was called Barney, 

“Hello ma’am,” you spoke politely. 

“Hello, and don’t call me ma’am. That makes me feel old, call me (her name,” she responded. “Honey, Victor is out shopping for dinner. Are you staying?” she informed Pip then asked you.

“Uhhh,” you responded before Pip replied for you.

“Yes,” she answered. “Now I’m gonna get on with tutoring,” she spoke, practically dragging you up the stairs as she was smiling. You could tell she loved her family a lot.

Once inside her room, you saw her hurriedly drop her clean underwear and bras into the wardrobe, embarrassed, and also flip the murder board around. “Nice room, I see you’re very dedicated to the case,” you spoke, smiling softly.

“Thank you, yes I am,” she spoke and sat down at her desk. She got a second chair out and offered it to you. “Should we start tutoring now?” she asked. You nodded, groaning as you hated studying. “It won’t be that bad!” Pip responded. You nodded and sat down, ready. 

Pip lied. It was hard, and it was that bad. She was a hard teacher but it was working. Also mainly because you admired her in class didn’t help hence the studying. You were smart after all. “I don’t see why you struggled that much if you got it just now,” Pip asked confused.

“I just… zone out in class,” you half lied. Yes, you did, but it was over Pip. 

“I see,” she responded. “Can I see your grade sheet?” she asked. You could see the cogs turning in her head. You couldn’t just say no though, so you did as told and got your grade sheet out for her. She saw the pattern, you knew from the look she gave it.

“I’m going to the bathroom,” you immediately spoke, not wanting to hear the rejection. You had crushed on her for 10 years after all. She nodded, analysing the paper. You rushed out, feeling your heart beat faster than it ever had, even when you accidentally looked at Pip in the changing room that one time. After what felt like forever, there was a knock on the door. “It’s Pip. You know… it’s ok, right? No need to panic,” she offered support. You just whimpered in response, feeling tears. “What if I say I had my eye on you too?” she offered. You froze and suddenly opened the door. Pip, not expecting it, fell into the bathroom as she was lying on the floor. 

“Sorry,” you immediately apologised, going to help her up.

“It’s fine. That was a dumb place to lean against anyway I’ll admit,” she chuckled, letting you help her up. “I was saying the truth though. I saw you stare at me more time than you think and I could feel it. You intrigued me,” she spoke. 

“Why didn’t you talk to me?” you asked quietly, wondering if she was lying.

“Because I didn’t want to misinterpret it. I, Pippa Fitz-Amobi, am bad at reading feelings,” she answered. You were shocked. “So… want to talk more, see how it goes?” she offered shyly. You nodded.

“Yes please,” you answered.

“Then that is in order. Now dinner is ready, it’s tacos. Are you ok with that?” she asked. You nodded. 

You hoped it would work out…

[joyful-soul-collector]

Eclectic Ensemble

Pairing: Steven Grant, Marc Spector, and Jake Lockley x gn!reader (reader wears slightly more masculine clothing but other than that it's pretty neutral)

Summary: Reader decides they're going to ask the moon boys out on a date. Things do not go perfectly to plan

Tags: SFW, asking out, neighbors to lovers (is that a tag??), swearing, uhhh reader is a major fucking dork who talks to their cat like it can understand them, no TWs it's all fluff

Wordcount: 1288

Read on Ao3

You couldn’t figure out why you couldn’t stop thinking about him. You’d had crushes before, and those were tolerable, you would daydream, but you’d snap back to reality at some point, and go about your day like normal. 

With the man across the hall though… that was something else entirely. 

You tried to convince yourself it was just the mystery of him, the fact that he seemed to have three different accents depending on the day, how one day he’d be cheerful and awkward while the other he’d be suave or stand-offish or nervous. 

But you couldn’t convince yourself of that, because even after he explained to you that he had DID and was not in fact a method actor of some kind, you still found yourself fascinated by him despite the mystery being solved. 

Fascinated by all three of them honestly. 

You’d talked to each of them in the hall before, learned things about them, even visited Steven at the museum a couple days ago. That’s what started it honestly, you’d chatted for hours after he got off work, each of them periodically switching out to have turns to speak with you. Sitting next to them by the fountain, rambling on about anything and everything as the sky grew darker and darker, it was the most fun you’d had in ages. And by the end of the night, with the way you couldn’t seem to shake the thoughts of them, you’d think you were in love with all three of them.

Which is also part of the reason you were so nervous to be doing this. 

You folded the collar of your dress shirt down, sighing at your reflection in the mirror on your closet door. 

“What do you think? Too much?” You turned to look at your cat, who was sitting on your desk, not at all minding that she was wrinkling all your papers. She stared at you for a moment, then licked her paw. “Yeah. Too much.”

There’s no way they’ll say yes, you thought as you unbuttoned your shirt. Even if one of them likes me back, what’re the chances the other two will be willing to date me if they don’t like me? Even lower chances that two of them will be interested, and definitely not all three of them. This is such an awful idea, why the hell am I doing this?

As you were undoing the third button you heard someone walking down the hall outside your front door. Normally this wouldn’t be cause for alarm, but you recognized the voice drawing closer and closer. 

“Yeah, I know it’s your turn to choose dinner tonight, but I’m just saying, could you maybe not go wild with the hot sauce this time? You always do that and then leave me and Steven to deal with the stomachache after--”

A voice speaking in Spanish cut him off, and you would’ve started laughing if the panic hadn’t seized you right in that moment. 

They weren’t supposed to be home this early! You were supposed to have another hour to get ready, to rehearse what you wanted to say, to work up enough courage!

You didn’t even stop to think about what you were doing because you could hear them getting out their keys, and if you didn’t do it now you weren’t sure you ever would. So you sprinted to your front door and flung it open. 

There stood the man you’d been waiting for. It was clear that Steven was the one who dressed them that day, wearing his oversized clothes, but the perpetually frowning face 100% belonged to Marc right now. He glanced over his shoulder at you. 

“Oh, hey Y/N! How’re y--” He cut off as he fully turned around to see you, and it was only then that you remembered exactly what you were wearing. 

Not only was your shirt halfway unbuttoned, but you were wearing a rather old tank top underneath it, your bedhead was not the hot kind, you didn’t have any shoes or socks on, and of course, you were wearing a pair of fluffy blue pajama pants covered in cat fur. 

Marc was clearly trying not to smile, but it wasn’t working very well, and for a moment you were glad for it, as Marc seemed to smile the least out of the three. 

“I uh--Well I--Okay I was going to ask you something,” you said with an embarrassed laugh, running a hand through your hair as a nervous habit, but also just to try and get it under control a bit. “But just--Just hang on, lemme put on actual clothes--”

“Pfft, you’re fine, we don’t care about that, you should see the things Marc tries to make us go out in some days,” Jake said, his Spanish accent replacing Marc’s American one. “He would wear pajamas to work if me and Steven didn’t stop him. Go head, what’s up?”

You stared at him for a second, and in that moment you remembered exactly why you hadn’t been able to stop thinking about them. 

Because no matter who was talking to you, each of them had that same soft look in their eye. The one that made you feel instantly better after an awful day, that made you smile when you were worried, that made you feel like you could be yourself in a way no one else did.

The one that didn’t care at all how disheveled you looked right now, only about the question you wanted to ask him. 

“Do you wanna go out sometime? Maybe for coffee?” you said. Jake blinked, and immediately his demeanor changed, his head tilting to the side as fidgety fingers rose up to touch the strap of his bag. 

“You mean, like a date?” Steven said in his British accent. “You’re asking us out? All of us?”

You nodded and suddenly felt like looking anywhere but at their face, running a hand nervously through your hair again. 

“You uh, you guys can think about it of course, you don’t have to answer right--”

“We’d love to,” Steven interrupted. You looked up to find him smiling brightly at you, the excitement so evident in him he practically glowed. 

“Really? ‘We’ as in, all three of you?”

“Yes, yeah, er, well we've been meaning to for a while really, we wanted to ask you at the fountain the other day but… I dunno, we weren’t sure you liked any of us that way, much less all three of us.”

You gave a small laugh and leaned your arm up on the door frame, shaking your head. 

“I honestly don’t know how I couldn’t like all three of you. Really it’s a surprise that all three of you like me.”

You gestured pointedly to your rather comical outfit, and Steven laughed. 

“I dunno,” he said, tilting his head and gazing at your eclectic ensemble. “It’s kind of cute, in a messy sort of way. Jake and Marc think so too.”

“Oh? Well maybe I’ll wear this on our date then.”

He laughed again, and you chatted for a few more minutes, long enough to set up a coffee date for Sunday, before Jake said he needed to get started on dinner (much to Steven and Marc’s annoyance). 

Once you were back on your flat with the door closed behind you, you punched the air with triumph, letting out a laugh of both relief and excitement. 

“YES, yes yes yes! Fuck yeah!” 

Your cat stared at you with her head cocked as you did a victory lap around your living room, before returning to licking her fur, and you liked to imagine she silently believed in you all along. 

THE END

If you made it this far, congratulations, you have read the first x reader fic I have ever written lol. Lemme know what you think, I hope you enjoyed!

[jazeswhbhaven]

An Unlighty Guy | React | Spoilers

I decided to wait and do day four and five together because these mini parts are so short.

Another "sunny" day in Gehenna where there's nothing but fucking angels coming in here and screwing up things as per usual. I'd still like to know why it is that they attack Gehenna so frequently...like do they just have beef with Satan that badly?

I feel like this was explained in either the Halloween event from last year....or chapter one but I digress.

Anyways the units are out fighting and then they spy this little adorable soul that I will be adopting

Like??? I know at a certain age any devil can possibly sign up to fight for Satan's army but he's clearly young based on his horn size and face. :( he's just a child.

We also find out that he's part of Amy's unit. The commando uniform is suppose to mimic Amy's/Satan's jumpsuit. So it's a wonder how this youngin' got separated from everyone.

Sitri is here to the rescue! So we see the details of the Iron Maiden, and we are aware of how it works based on the gameplay of the battles. I feel it's really cool the devs gave a sprite for it. I wish we had a sprite for the other weapons used for reference.

The angels are being stubborn meat shields, claiming it doesn't matter what he does but one thing about Sitri? He's gonna give it all he's got until he can't and that's one of the things I like about him.

And things are starting to look bleak, Sitri getting bad wounds, thinking he should take refuge in the Iron Maiden if all else fails while protecting the young devil...he's prepared to give his life for Gehenna because that's what Satan would do and his purpose is similar if not the same.

Now here...I thought Sitri was going pale from blood loss and I was worried like??

Oh...I know that he means...

Here come Amy with his headass (aave for one who is foolish/stupid) self LMAO

I swear. And I call Amy foolish because of his pranks mostly lmao I actually don't think he's that stupid of a devil. Just to clarify. Also uhhh ya left ya boi here when he's part of your command like how you fumble that badly?

So Amy's unit pretty much killed the remaining angels, Amy goes to see why Sitri was there by himself and then he sees our boi and he's confused because well...he's one of his lol

Like yes my guy one of your bois are not with you and you're out here being all loud and bad for what? Left someone behind...

Sitri, within his right, is very upset about this. He goes on to reprimand Amy that he shouldn't of left his comrade out here by himself and wondered what it is that he was doing to even not notice that he did. It does come off as poor leadership. And this is one of the moments where we see the clear difference in how one leads. Sitri is pretty in the know of where his subordinates are and notices if someone is missing. Amy was being so rash and bold riding around with his commandos that he didn't notice the little one being left behind.

This that we also see, is that even though Amy apologized for not noticing, the devil boy in a nice way says that he doesn't accept his apology and that it's not a big deal. To him it was a big deal, he left him out there on his lonesome, he hasn't had his name stitched on his uniform yet and he's a rookie. So yes, he definitely needed guidance if this was his first time out on the field.

And it wasn't the fact that he was in danger, the boy was upset because Sitri was injured so badly protecting him.

Also Amy went to tell Satan about what happened, and this is one of times where we get to see how he deals out punishments. Satan was annoyed and basically...

I couldn't help but laugh. He literally said his ass wouldn't be kicked a month. Gehenna is truly fucking wild because getting kicked by their king is literally praise and something good like a pat on the back.

We know how hard Satan kicks, I'd secretly be happy he ain't kicking me around for the month cause then my ass can heal. ;w;

But anyways,

Amy's subordinates are trying to stick up for him, but he doesn't want that kind of sympathy right now. He keeps focused on the fact that in that moment he lost to Sitri by being the biggest "jerk" for what he did. That's also how he felt too. He had nothing to say, he couldn't defend himself nor his actions because he knew deep down he is responsible for all of his units and his men. He's a leader and in this moment he wasn't one. No matter how much disdain he holds for Sitri.

This is something I liked reading about because Amy was holding himself accountable instead of being up his own ass about it and saying it wasn't his fault. This is how we are aware that Amy doesn't just think about being the best, he wants to truly be the best he can and do right by himself, his unit, and most importantly Gehenna.

If he can't even do that, then what's the point of this beef he has with Sitri?

so remember how they say, if the person who always gets on to you never does anymore that's how you know you've lost them? this is true for platonic, romantic, and business relationships and I believe that phrase myself.

Sitri literally is ignoring him. He feels that incident was the worst possible thing he could have done and he had to step up risk his own life facing those angels all alone.

So here...I'd say sorry Amy stans but ya man's fucked up big time.

But it seems we're left with Sitri hearing some troubling news when he's almost done healing....

Let's see what awaits our blue haired boi on day 6!

Btw, how are ya'll liking the story so far? I've seen some good observations and reactions floating around ^^ but I was just curious.

Is this event a yay or nay? Or is it too early to tell...

[randomsloredrops]

Random's Lore Drops - Cnaonfell Papayas WOOOO-

i'm running out of shit to name these you gotta give me suggestions as to what I can name these lore drops. fish lady's next so literally ANYBODY who's reading this gimme a funny name to call undyne in her post. ANYWAYS, Howdy hey fellas, name's Ran- wait no, that's my intro in my soundcloud FUCK. Anyways, name's Random, you know this, you read the fucking title, let's get to the point. BRING OUT THE PICTURE OF THE... wait... just Papyrus? He doesn't have a canon nickname? Fuck... BRING OUT PAPYRUS!

(Design by THE one and only Vic The Fella/Underfella/Underfell.) You dont understand how long it took me to get the small amount of sans out and all of the information arrows, holy SHIT. anyways cue the uhhh read more

alright time to act formal now that the curtains are down or some shit idk. Papyrus T. Skeleton, also known as Papyrus, Pap, and also... bonehead? wait am i reading this right? damn,, alright, so basically fuck the formality. alright jackasses, let's get yapping. if you know papyrus, then you should be able to tell that, well... he's a skeleton. hence the last name "skeleton". but, unlike undertale's papyrus, canonfell papyrus... is a part of the fucking royal guard. IN FACT! he's second in command, which means he's actually pretty cool and... cool. yeah, that's it. anyways, you might have noticed the weird wonky armor that just looks like an evil papyrus armor, HOWEVER, he does have official "Royal Guard" armor that he despises wearing. Unless he's on official business, such as with Asgore or Undyne, he won't wear it. Design is HERE. You're prolly wondering where Papyrus got his scar from. Well, basically, to put a long story short, his brother was about to get killed by uhhhh Asgore because he couldn't break the barrier like Gaster said they would, and so Papyrus stopped Asgore. Guess what HE gets? A position in the Royal Guard, and his eye being stabbed in by Asgore's claw. Sans gets POWERS!, thas it. Unlike most Monsters in Underfell, he feels remorse- hold on, what's that word mean? what the fuck does remorse mean, google dot com... found it. so basically, he feels regret any time he HAS to kill, and he also swears the least out of everybody. Oh, right. CHECK OUT BROTHER RELATIONSHIP HERE FUCKHEADS! k, i dont have to explain. Oh yeah, Papyrus laughs really fucking weirdly, going "HAW HAW HAW" instead of "NYEH HEH HEH". According to fella, it is a "very powerful ugly laugh". It makes him hate when people try to make him laugh. According to my sources (canonfell wiki)... Ahem... "Papyrus likes evil puns, but will not get regular ones". I am going to kill somebod- Oh YEAAAH, papayas cooks lasagna instead of spaghetti. He also cooks chimichangas, which Sans sells, and he... wants to write his own cookbook? I mean, shit, I'd buy it. Also, in terms of, like, AUs meeting AUs, Underfell Papyrus is friends with Horrortale Papyrus and "Trades" recipes. He does not accept Horror Papyrus' recipe for... obvious reasons. Papyrus is an AMAZING actor, being able to pretend that he's this menacing Royal Guard, and pretend he does the killing he's forced to do for sport. Don't forget that his voice is canonically deeper, but he can LITERALLY just raise the pitch in his voice whenever he wants and shock people. Lastly (because it's almost 2 AM)... Papyrus is Asgore's number 1 hater, and he can't do shit about it (if Papyrus is weaker than Undyne, and Undyne's weaker than Asgore... Well, obviously he won't win). Anyways, fuck you, I hope you have a wonderful rest of your week!

[roses-r-rosie3]

Two Animal Obsessed Idiots

Jason Todd x M!/GN!Reader

Warnings: Crack and swearing

Summary: The reader and Damian are both obsessed with animals, so while Jason is out on a mission, the reader and Damian start to go to all different types of animal stores and little do they know there’s no more room left in Wayne Manor nor Jason and the reader’s apartment

Quote: “Hold on Damian is in on this?! Oh that little brat is gonna- HOLY SHIT IS THAT A LION?!”

✁ - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

When Jason first introduced you to his family, everyone in his family loved you. But one person in particular was really interested in you, and his name was Damian. You both shared a love for animals, so it wasn’t much of a surprise for anyone in the family when you and Damian got really close.

Some days, Damian would come to both you and Jason’s apartment just to hang out with your pets. Talking about your pets, you already had at least 4 dogs, 2 cats, and 1 bunny. But it never really felt like you had enough animals, of course you loved all of the animals you had now, but you needed more. And when you asked Jason..

��NO! NO! NO! WE ARE NOT SPENDING MORE MONEY ON ANOTHER ANIMAL!” Jason yelled.

“But just look at it!!!” You said as you pulled up a picture of the 2nd bunny you wanted.

“Most of our apartment is already filled to the brim with animals! And you want more?!” Jason asked.

“Yes! You can never have enough!” You tried to explain.

“I can’t do this right now y/n, I have to go on a mission today” Jason sighed.

“Fine” you pouted.

“Don’t be such a big baby” Jason smiled before kissing you.

“See you in a couple weeks baby” Jason smiled before leaving.

After Jason left you were left on the couch petting your dogs and wondering what to do with your free time. But that’s when you got a phone call from Damian.

“Hi y/n, Todd is out on a mission, and I was thinking that we go to all types of different pet stores and getting more pets” Damian suggested.

“I would love to, but Jason told me I couldn’t get any more animals” You sighed

Damian just bursted out laughing.

“What is he? Your dad? Come on! It’ll be fun” Damian said.

“Fine, why not, what’s the worst that could happen?”

You ended up picking up Damian from Wayne Manor, and you guys ended up with at least 16 new dogs, 17 new cats, 5 new bunnies, 3 new birds, 23 new pet fishes, 13 new hamsters, and somehow you both adopted 2 lions(don’t ask how, but just know it wasn’t an easy process).

When you both got to Wayne Manor, you two could let half of the pets there, so you had no choice but to take the rest to your house. Surprisingly, all of them fit in your apartment, sure you probably didn’t have much space to relax but who would need to? To your surprise, the lion was rather friendly with the rest of the animals, And then you heard a knock at the door.

“Y/n? Can you open the door for me? I think I left the keys in there while I was out on the mission” Jason asked.

“Uhhh, yeah! In a bit!” You yelled out as you tried to shove all the animals into one room.

“Oh never mind it was just in my pocket!” Jason said.

“Wait! Uhh! I’m.. uhh… naked!” You said.

“Y/n I’ve seen you naked before, I’m pretty sure it’s fine” Jason sighed as he opened the door to see new animals in your apartment.

“Y/n! I thought I told you that we couldn’t get new animals!” Jason scolded.

“Yeah, but Damian said it was fine and we could-”

“Hold on Damian is in on this?! Oh that little brat is gonna- HOLY SHIT IS THAT A LION?!” Jason screamed before running off to the lobby.

The lion tilted it’s head in confusion and you laid next to it, petting it.

“Don’t worry buddy, he’ll warm up to you” you smiled as you patted it.

Extras:

[starplusfourletters]

I finally finished the last command

and it was a romp (spoilers)

Chewie spends the whole book on the edge of a nervous breakdown but buddy you very much did that to yourself. Sure, you swear a life debt to a guy who turns out to be One of the People in the Galaxy That Things Just Keep Happening To. Bad luck, bound to happen sometimes. But then you decide that life debt extends to his wife knowing FULL WELL that Even More Things Just Keep Happening to HER, and then they go and have TWINS? That’s on you, bud.

Mara “I still do want revenge on Luke Skywalker yes definitely now hold that thought I need to go risk my life to save Leia and the twins” Jade. Mara you’re embarrassing yourself.

Actual conversation:

Leia: Thanks again for saving my life. Mara: Don’t thank me until after I’ve killed Luke which I still absolutely want to do. Leia: So uhhh why’d you do it? Mara: I’m just opposed to kidnapping. Leia: Were you kidnapped? Mara: I dOn’T wAnT tO tAlK aBoUt iT yes. Leia: ... Mara: YOU THINK THIS IS ABOUT MY TROUBLED PAST?? Leia: … Mara: BECAUSE IT’S NOT Leia: … Mara: Anyway here’s the information only I can provide that will turn the tide of the war. It’s free. Friends and family discount. Leia: Thanks. Mara: I’M STILL GOING TO KILL YOUR BROTHER Leia: That’s nice, dear.

MY KINGDOM FOR GHENT. His dad boss forgets to pick him up from AV Club so he spends two months wandering unrestricted through the capital building and then cracks Enigma because he’s bored

A TWELVE-DAY Character Bonding Hiking Trip??!? Zahn’s really outdone himself this time

WAIT THIS WHOLE TIME MARA DIDN’T KNOW LUKE AND VADER ARE RELATED?? Omigod that’s HILARIOUS. I mean, yeah, I guess it just never came up? And she didn’t watch the OT movies? That’s very funny to me for some reason. I definitely assumed she’d gotten that memo

Oh man it really feels like I should have seen that reveal coming and I absolutely did not. Gawd I love the 90s. Wowowowowowow. Chef’s kiss. I have so many questions about the Bespin janitorial system

“LUUKE” I’m dying

Admiral “It appears to be a trap.” Akbar

We interrupt your regularly scheduled Good vs. Evil Star Wars content to bring you “the two Evil factions getting in each other’s way vs the two Good factions getting in each other’s way until they all realize we’ve hit the end of the book and just start attacking everything indiscriminately”

The Climactic Battle Scene:

Luke: Fighting his clone! Han: Pew pew pew pew! Mara: Psychic defense! Psychic attack! Leia: Dual wielding blaster and lightsaber! Karrde: In the back, petting his doggos and talking on his phone I was legit worried about his safety in this book. But he's not dumb; he knows he doesn't have enough plot armor to take on the Big Bad. He is simply the best there is

Wedge / Aves is the rarepair I didn’t know I needed

RUKH!!

Oh thank God the doggos are okay

So as far as I can tell Thrawn made one mistake that wasn’t just bad luck and it was doing a shit job of getting Mara out of the way. The dude really should have had MORE of his enemies killed

Thesis statement: Aww Themb! <3

Now I just need to watch someone explain this series to Ep9-era Palpatine. Preferably in the style of Worthikids.

[tangledinink]

Chapter Eleven of I'm Sorry, Teenage Mutant What Now? is here!!! The gang's got a new lead, and the first step is to re-group and re-plan... which is a little difficult given their current, uh, whole situation. But they'll be fine, probably! Read it on ao3 or below the cut!

[ prev ]

After drafting and deleting seven different texts to the quote-unquote "Mad Dogz" group chat that did not even come close to summarizing the conversation she just had, April finally gave up, instead just texting, "where is everyone???? emergency huddle asap"

Not more than fifteen seconds after she sent that off, her phone started buzzing with a call from Raph. Y’know, she wasn't sure what she had expected.

 "Are you okay? What's goin' on?" Raph demanded the second she picked up the call, and she had to bite back a breathless, shaky little laugh. She knew it wasn't nice, and that he was just wound up and worried, but she was still just buzzing from the conversation she had just had with Sunita. It wasn't him, she was just-- overwhelmed. In a good way?

"I'm fine! I'm fine. It's-- it's a good emergency, I swear. Where are you?"

"I just ducked outta class. I'm on the third floor. Where we meetin'?"

"Okay. Uh. Head towards the south stairwell, and I'll figure out where the others are and we'll go from there." 

"Raph's got it! See ya soon."

April ended the call, heading off in the direction of their agreed rendezvous point with hurried steps, struggling to find an appropriate pace. She fought the urge to sprint through the halls, knowing that this was just going to bring unwanted attention her way... but every bit of her body was absolutely alight with energy. The exhaustion from earlier had melted away. Her entire circulatory system had all been replaced with adrenaline, and she was just shining, all lit up in every sense. 

Things were gonna be okay. Things were gonna be okay. Things were gonna be okay.

Raph beat her to the stairwell, and April was thrilled because there was no way she could stand to sit around and wait for anything right now. The second the door to the stairwell was closed behind her, and they were away from any prying eyes, her carefully measured steps turned into an ecstatic bounce-and-hop motion, closing the small gap between the two of them with an excited squeak as she threw her arms around her brother and squeezed him as tight as she possibly could.

"Whoa," Raph blinked in surprise, shifting slightly to correct his footing and prevent his older sister from straight-up tripping over him. "Did somethin' happen?"

"YES!" April exclaimed. "Yes, yes, yes! It's-- it's a really long story and I really really wanna tell you absolutely everything right now but it's gonna be so much easier to wait until we have everyone even though it is killing me but it's-- it's good! Raph, I think everything is gonna work out!!!"

Her cheeks ached from grinning.

"It's not simple or anything, but I just-- I really, really, really think things might actually end up being okay." 

His expression wasn't quite readable to her-- it was somewhere between excited and confused and hesitant, with stress and exhaustion coloring it all, but it was still the best expression she had seen on him in over two weeks and it made all the hair on her body stand up with goosebumps and just.

God.

She wanted her dumb extended family back together and happy again so so so bad.

"Wha--?! April, you can't just say that and then not explain nothin'--!" Raph protested, and April shook out her hands, flicking her wrists back and forth as if to shake away the excess energy.

"I know! I know, I promise I'll explain everything! We just gotta get the rest of the guys first! It's really complicated... did anyone else text back yet?"

"Uhhh..." Raph fished his phone out of his pocket, and his eyes immediately bugged out of his head. Oooh, that can't be good. April leaned over to see.

[ Mikey: principals office :p i can prbly sneak out tho

Donnie: I'm currently occupying Supply Closet 33C, located on the left side of the second floor of the East Wing. It is labeled as such on the school's blueprints.

Leo: lmao wtf y'all

Leo: im on the roof tho ]

"WHAT THE--!?"

"Oh my god," April groaned, burying her face in her hands.

"IT'S ONLY BEEN ONE DAY!!!"

"It's-- it's fine! We can go get 'em, it'll be fine!"

"WHAT HAPPENED TO THE PLAN?! AND TEXTING IF ANYTHING HAPPENED?! HOW DID HE GET ON THE FREAKIN' ROOF!?--"

"RAPH!" April grabbed the other's shoulders, shaking him briefly. "Chill! It's fine. Okay? We'll kick their asses later. Let's just go collect them first and get out of here, okay? Way bigger fish to fry, remember?"

He groaned loudly, tilting his head back, biting his lip, all but sulking with his arms crossed over his chest. "... Fine."

Thank god. Raph may be a dumbass sometimes, but he was way more reasonable than he let on... usually. April sighed softly, offering a fist to bump.

"Come on. Team Big Sibling?"

"Yeah... okay. Team Big Sibling. Let's go bail those knuckleheads out."

---

Raph watched the cup fall, but he still jumped and winced at the sound of ceramic shattering on the ground.

“Oops,” Leo said. Suddenly he didn’t want to be standing on the counter quite so bad anymore, and quickly scuttled his way back down.

“Leo!” Raph huffed in annoyance, immediately on his feet. “I told you you were gonna knock somethin’ over!”

“Yeah, but I wanted to--”

“Raph doesn’t wanna hear it! Go get a broom or somethin’ so we can clean it up before Dad sees!” Raphael insisted, all but shooing his brother away. Leo groaned loudly, rolling his eyes and scowling, but obeyed regardless, running off to go and retrieve the requested tool. Raph huffed, moving to begin cleaning up the evidence of the crime… this was one of Dad’s favorite mugs. Hopefully, he didn’t hear the shattering glass from the back garden with Mikey. Mikey was pretty loud. With any luck, this secret would die with them.

“... How do you do that?” April questioned after a moment, tilting her head to the side, leaning over the side of the couch as she observed the exchange from the living room.

Raph paused slightly, his brows furrowing. “Do what?”

“Get ‘em to listen to you like that.” 

“Oh,” Raph said. “Well, they don’t always listen to me.”

“Yeah, but they do when you really want ‘em to.”

Raph frowned a little, considering this for a moment before shrugging. “Because I’m the biggest, I guess.”

April laughed, “Like you’ll beat them up if they don’t do what you say?”

“No!” Raph protested. “... Well, I mean, yeah, kinda. But also ‘cause I’m the big brother! They have to.”

“Why?”

“‘Cause. Dad said I’m in charge when he’s not here. I’m responsible, and all that other junk,” he explained proudly.

“Well, like, yeah, but why? Why do you gotta be the responsible one just ‘cause you were born first?”

“Uh… I dunno. I guess just ‘cause they’re littler and they don’t know as much stuff yet,” he said. 

“But Donnie is really smart. He knows lots of stuff.”

“Well…”

“He wins at the trivia games every single time we play. And Scrabble!”

Raph hesitated a bit, shrugging a little as he picked up pieces of ceramic off the floor. “I guess there’s stuff that they know that I don’t. But I still gotta take care of ‘em and protect them and stuff. It’s just what big brothers do. It’s our job.” 

“You can’t have a job,” April said with a snort. “You’re eight.”

“Yeah, but I want to,” he said. “... I like taking care of ‘em and stuff. I dunno. Maybe you just do that when you’re born first. Automatically. Like, just ‘cause they’re littler. And so you wanna keep them safe and make sure no one hurts them and nothing bad happens or anything.”

April narrowed her eyes slightly behind her glasses, and Raph looked slightly to the side.

“And I kinda like getting to tell them what to do sometimes!”

April laughed, and this time Raph joined her. “Well, sometimes they deserve it!” He insisted, tossing the mug pieces in the trash, taking care to drop them in such a way that they would fall down to the bottom and not be visible from the top. As biggest brother, he knew by now how to destroy evidence. He flopped back over onto the couch with April once he was done, jostling her slightly, leaning into her on purpose as he did so. She squealed in response, pushing him back, and the two shoved and pushed in between giggles for a moment before they finally settled in a heap across the cushions, sort of splayed out across one another and staring up at the ceiling. 

April breathed in deep before giving a very soft sigh.

“I wish I was a big sister.”

Raph glanced over at the other, hesitating a moment before he spoke up again.

“You kinda are, though.”

She paused, moving to meet his eyes with a look of surprise.

“You think so?”

“Well. Yeah! I mean. We hang out all the time,” Raph said, shrugging. “And you come to our house after school. And we go to your house on the weekends. And you eat dinner with us sometimes, and we do sleepovers, and we have all our birthdays together… And they listen to you, too, when you want ‘em too. And you know how to talk with Donnie, and you keep an eye on Mikey, and you laugh at Leo’s jokes--”

“I’m not being nice! I really do think they’re funny!”

“-- so I think that basically counts, probably.”

April wrinkled her nose up with thought.

“Does that mean you’re not the biggest brother?”

“Wait, what!?” Raph floundered for a moment, rolling back over onto his stomach so he could face April properly. “No! Raph’s the biggest brother!” He couldn’t not be the biggest brother! He had always been the biggest brother! It was his job to look after his little brothers, to always protect them and take care of them and make sure they were safe. That was what Raph did! And he was good at it!

“But you can’t be the biggest if I’m your sister!” April argued. “I’m seven months older than you are!”

“Yeah but-- but that’s different!”

“Why? You just said I’m a big sister.”

“Yeah, but, I meant, like… like to everyone else!”

“So I’m not your sister?”

“No! I mean-- you are-- but--” Raph screwed up his face. “I still wanna be the big brother, April! You can’t just un-biggest me!”

April frowned, looking the other up and down, considering for a moment, before she finally sighed.

“Okay, fine. I guess we can probably both be the big siblings together, then. Deal?”

Raph sighed in relief, flopping down on the couch again and extending his hand.

“Deal.”

---

After assuring their little brothers that they were on their way, Raph and April had started on the journey towards the Principal's office to retrieve the littlest Hamato, taking care to dodge any hall monitors, faculty, or staff, and intensely plotting their rescue mission as they went.

"Alright, and you're sure that you can do a believable impression of Hugh Jackman?"

"Yeah, of course I can!" Raph blustered. "I mean... how hard can it be? It'll be over the phone anyway. You know stuff always sounds weird over the phone."

"Raph, come on! If we can't get the secretary to go look at her car's check engine light, this plan is never gonna get Mikey out of there!"

"Raph can do it! I swear! And if this doesn't work, we still have the backup plan--"

"No, we don't, remember? I only brought the strawberry chapstick today, my peach-flavored one is at home--"

"What are you guys talking about?" Mikey interrupted, poking his head from around the corner. April and Raph both jumped.

"MIKEY!" Raph yelped, struggling to keep his voice level. "We-- you-- what are you doin' here?! I thought you were in the principal's office!"

"Well yeah, I was, but then I left to come meet you guys!"

"How'd you get out!?" April questioned, and Mikey shrugged.

"Oh, it's easy. You just have to cry hard enough that the receptionist offers to go get you some water, and then you walk out," Mikey explained. "That's what I always do."

"What you always do?!" Raph spluttered. "What do you mean what you always-- what the heck happened, anyway?! Why were you in there in the first place? Are you okay? Did you-- what happened to your hand?!"

Raph wasn't meaning to, uhhh, spiral like this exactly, but they were all valid questions, he was pretty sure! He grabbed his little brother's wrist to examine his knuckles, which were somewhat bloodied, scabbed, and swollen. 

"I'm fine!" Mikey whined in protest, trying to wriggle his way out of his brother's grip. "It's not a big deal--"

"Did you get into a fight?!"

"Well--"

"Mikey!"

"Calling it a fight might be a little generous,” Mikey muttered, rolling his eyes. “Honestly, Raph, I'm fine! I can take care of myself!" He insisted, squirming away, darting behind April as if to shield himself. Raph was feeling that eye twitch coming back on. ‘Not a big deal!?’ What did he mean, ‘not a big deal!?’ They had talked about this before!!! What if he got hurt!? And this kind of thing went on his permanent record, you know, didn't he understand that they weren't little kids anymore!? He could get into real trouble--

"Can't we talk about this later?" Mikey insisted, holding his hands up to plead, batting his eyes. "Leo and Donnie are still waiting! Remember?"

"Okay, look," April interrupted. "Mikey has a point. Let's get Leo and Donnie first, and then you guys can do your whole... whatever this thing that you’re doing is. Okay?"

Raph groaned, grinding his teeth, scrubbing at his face with his hands. Right. He still had two other little brothers he had to round up... and one of them was on the roof. Aw, man. He swore he could feel himself going gray...

"Fine. But this conversation is not over," he hissed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Where next?"

"Let's go grab Leo," April sighed. "Since he's probably freezing his butt off, and then we'll snag Donnie on our way back down and skip out of here. Sound good?"

"How did Leo get onto the roof?" Mikey questioned, already making his way towards the staircase, the other two following after.

"I. Don't. Know." Raph grit out as they made their way back into the stairwell, heading on up. He had never been up to the roof before-- could they even get up there? Surely they must be able to, given that Leo had gotten up there in the first place, right? He could only assume that the door had locked behind him. He wondered dimly how long he had been up there, wrinkling up his nose with worry. Leo got cold pretty easily... all of them did, actually, it ran in the family, and it wasn't exactly nice outside. Certainly not freezing or anything, but brisk. The last thing they needed was for him to get sick or something...

He picked up the pace, taking two steps at a time. Mikey kept up with ease, and April complained from behind them, lagging somewhat. Sorry, Apes! Little brother to rescue. 

Like most buildings in NYC, their school was big and tall, so it was a little bit of a trek to get to the top of the staircase. Luckily, they had already started about halfway up, and, just as Raph had been hoping, the door did, in fact, open from the inside. Thank god. Raph made a mental note not to let that shut behind them and trap all of them up here.

"Leo!" He called, looking around frantically. He had to be up here, right? They only had one roof? He was almost certain-- wait, what if there was a second roof he didn't know about?! And they were on the wrong roof?!

"Hey, big brother." Leo's voice was a lazy drawl, and he peered from behind the door, where he had been posted up against the wall, just out of sight once the door had swung open. "Took you guys long enough."

Oh good. He was here. He was okay. 

This was ideal because this way Raph could throttle him.

"Leo!" He exclaimed, turning to face him properly. "What are you doin' on the roof?! How long have you been up here!?"

"Uhhh..." Leo had the audacity to check his watch. "I dunno. Like. Four hours?"

"FOUR HOURS?! Leo, it's freezin' up here!"

"It's n-not that b-bad," Leo insisted, giving a wave. "It's, like... peaceful or whatever. I took a n-nap."

"You took a--?! How did you even get up here!? Why didn't you text somebody!?"

"Uhhh..." Leo pursed his lips, tilting his head back, staring up at the sky. He rolled his shoulders, humming softly, shuffling his feet a bit. "... I dunno!"

"You don't--? How can you not--?!"

Raph caught his tongue. He took a long, deep breath, and then sighed in an exhale. He shucked off his flannel so that he could wrap it around his younger brother instead, adding it over top of his hoodie and pulling him inside before he could protest-- dragging him into the building where it was safe and warm, closing the door firmly behind them.

Leo could act and put on airs all he wanted, but it was obvious just from looking at him that he was cold. Raphael wasn't that dumb. He didn't consider himself to be smart, exactly, but he wasn't dumb, either. 'Least not about this stuff.

“Raph, I’m fine, I don’t need--”

"Raph doesn’t wanna hear it. Keep the flannel on, you’re freezing. Come on. Let's go get Donnie."

---

Raph held the dustpan while Leo swept, repeatedly shifting his position to catch any remnants of broken ceramics that were left behind. 

“Is that all of it?” Leo questioned, leaning over to see, and Raph gave an affirmative nod, getting to his feet and moving to dump the last of the evidence in the garbage can.

“Yep! All set!” Raph affirmed, giving his younger brother a thumbs up. “No one’ll suspect a thing!”

Leo didn’t look so sure. “Yeah, but won’t Dad notice that the mug is missing?”

“Nah, don’t worry about it!” Raph assured, slinging an arm around the other’s shoulder. “We’ll just come up with a cover story. Like. Uhhh. We’ll say someone broke in and stole it or something! Or… well. Raph’ll come up with a plan! Dad’ll never know,” he insisted. He’d have to work on that later. He really wasn’t very good at that kind of thing, and he had no idea what he’d say, but he’d figure it out. He always did! Leo laughed a little bit, wrinkling up his nose with amusement. 

“Are you sure?”

“Course I’m sure!” Raph declared, puffing out his chest a bit. “Don’t worry. Raph has got your back. Even when you’re bein’ stupid.”

---

It wasn't that Casey didn't understand that the grand mission that her Clan had in the wings demanded sacrifice. She was well aware, and furthermore, perfectly willing to make those sacrifices. She had already made many over the course of her life, and she didn't regret a thing. Her former life, her education, former hobbies... none of that mattered even half as much as the path she was on now. She understood sacrifice. She was willing to sacrifice. 

But dammit, did she always have to be on lookout duty!?

Casey grumbled softly to herself, shifting her weight from foot to foot. She could only sit in one position on this dumb rooftop for so long before her legs started to go to sleep. She had been tempted for over an hour now to take a quick lap around the block, but she didn't dare leave her post. She was tasked with watching the Hamato household-- so watch the Hamato household she would. 

She had been doing this for days now, though it felt like longer, sharing shifts with other recruits of the Foot Clan. Though, of course, now that Jocelyn had been promoted to a full member of the Foot Clan, she would no longer be subject to such menial tasks. Cassandra had nearly broken a tooth this morning when she took over the other’s post-- the last one Jocelyn would ever have to endure-- biting out a strained congratulations to the other through a clenched jaw. Spoiled, stupid, undeserving, bratty little--

Casey was just on the brink of a total temper tantrum when she paused, a sudden realization smacking her in the face. Wait. 

Where was the big red one?

She paused, glancing at her watch and back up at the apartment several times, straining to peer through the various windows. It was noon. Cassandra hadn't been doing this for that long, but when you sit and watch the same family for days and days on end, you pick up on their habits and routines pretty quickly. And every single day since she had started watching them, without fail, the biggest Hamato would emerge from his room, head to the kitchen, retrieve a protein shake from the fridge, and go up the stairs to the third floor. She couldn't see from the windows exactly where he was going, but it was like absolute clockwork. She suspected that he must have an alarm set with how consistent this was-- him fetching a drink and bringing it to, she could only assume, one of the other members of the household.

But it was twelve-oh-five. And there was no sign of him.

A sinking feeling thudded through her gut. Now that she was thinking about it, she hadn't seen any of them the entire watch. Not even once. The woman she had seen several times, working on her laptop in the living room and occasionally puttering around the apartment, but... No Hamatos.

None at all.

Spluttering a bit, Casey reeled, jumping up to her feet. They weren't here!? But she had watched the entire time! She hadn't taken her eyes off the building-- she had been so vigilant! Did they know the Foot was watching them!? Did they sneak out somehow--

She set her jaws, hackles rising as she reached yet another epiphany. A strangled shriek of frustration escaped her.

Jocelyn. 

Oh, she knew she wasn't taking this lookout thing seriously! Casey had wasted the past three hours of her life watching a building that didn't even have the targets in it--!!! Swearing loudly, she wrestled her phone from her bag, nearly dropping it in her haste. 

"Hello--? Sir Baron Draxum? This is the Hamato Lookout team reporting--"

---

Leo had asked Donnie what he was doing in a supply closet. Donnie had, in response, asked what Leo was doing on the roof, effectively eliminating any further questions, though April was certain that all three of her younger brothers would be answering to Raph later. But not right now. There were way bigger priorities right now. Luckily, the upside to attending an absolutely massive school in the middle of NYC was that there were a ton of kids, the building was huge, and it was actually quite easy to just walk off campus. Only three blocks away from their high school was a local skate park: a popular destination for the group, so much so that it sported multiple murals and tags from Mikey, and almost sure to be sparsely populated at this time of day. Meaning it was quiet enough for April to finally recount her recent conversation with Sunita, through excited, frenzied whispers, stumbling over her own words as she attempted to explain.

"So Sunita is a... slime monster?" Mikey questioned, tilting his head to the side slightly.

"Well-- kind of. She's a 'yokai,' I guess? But she has this magic thing called a Cloaking Brooch that lets her disguise herself as a human."

"Whoa!" Mikey gasped. "They have that?! So mystic people can just... look like humans?"

"Fascinating," Donnie remarked, tapping out a few notes on his phone. "Imagine how many citizens of New York could actually be yokai in disguise..."

"I wonder how many other kids at our school have secretly been, like, mystic creatures this whole time, and we don't even know it!" Mikey awed.

"Well, I guess cloaking-brooch-crystal-things are, like, really rare, or something? And, like, crazy valuable," April explained. "It's kind of hard to get a hold of them, Sunita said. I mean. She also said some yokai can just do it on their own without any crystal magic or whatever, but if you can't, then you need a crystal, and they're hard to get. Sunita said her’s is a family heirloom, but they've only got one, and she gets it right now so she can go to school."

"What, they don't have yokai schools in the Hidden City?" Raph questioned.

"Uh. Kinda," April said, leaning back against the skate ramp they were huddled behind. "I guess it's kind of... uh... a little chaotic over there. I mean. I dunno. I guess the police don't do a lot, and also the city is basically under the control of a super-powerful crime boss? And she basically runs everything. And also bloodsport is, like, super a thing that they just do, and that's fine, so like, there's not really a lot of 'law' or 'order' or whatever? So if you have a chance to send your kid to the surface instead, it's sorta a no-brainer."

"Okay, but, like, how is that that different from New York..."

"I'm serious, Leo!" April insisted. "And it's, like, super against the rules to tell anyone who's not in the know about the Hidden City or yokai or anything, so we can't tell anyone that Sunita told us or her whole family could be in danger! This is a take-it-to-your-grave kind of secret, okay!?"

"Okay, okay," Leo said, holding his hands up in surrender. "I get it. Seriously. No jokes or quips, even. It's a secret. We won't tell a soul, April. I promise."

April sighed in relief, tilting her head back slightly. She totally owed Sunita a pizza night or something after this... 

"Okay... so… that's where Dad is? How do you know?"

April took a long, deep breath. "Okay, so, you know how I said that there's a super powerful crime boss? And that bloodsport is a thing?"

---

Weirdly enough, the cool concrete floor below him felt really good on his back right now. But maybe that was just because he was sore. Or because he was exhausted. Probably both. And though his previous stint in the Battle Nexus involved him flip-flopping back and forth between Luxury Boxes and cell blocks, Yoshi had a sneaking suspicion that it would be in his best interest to get used to his current dungeon-esque accommodations, at least for the foreseeable future. He doubted he would be being invited to any red-carpet events or dinner parties by his employer any time soon. He wasn't sure if he was upset about this or not. He didn't think he had the energy to socialize, let alone with Big Mama or any of her various acquaintances or cohorts. 

But it was far too quiet down here, all by himself, with only the echoing rumbles and cries of the Battle Nexus in the distance for company. He relished what little time he had outside of the ring, certainly, but… Though his body was crying for it, he found it difficult to sleep. His mind was too often occupied, mostly with thoughts of his children. Wondering how they were doing. Wondering if they were still looking, or if the police had already closed the case and assumed him dead-- again. 

How long had it been now? It was somewhat difficult to keep track of the exact passage of time down here, and he had to think on it for a moment before he came to the conclusion.

Eleven days, he believed it had been. Eleven days since he had last seen his children. He sighed softly through his nose, allowing his eyes to slide shut, to give himself a break from staring at the stone ceiling and take some time examining the backs of his eyelids instead.

This was the longest he had ever been away from them in all their lives. 

"The next-door neighbor's daughter is very good friends with the boys, so you can call or text them if you have any questions and can't get in touch with me, but I will have my phone on me if anything happens..."

"Right--"

"Their child, April, comes over often, and they like to play in the basement with her. Just keep the door open so you can hear any screaming."

"Okay, got it--"

"And these are all the emergency numbers. This is their doctor, this is Donatello's counselor, this one is Mikey's… this is the school, this is the director's number, my agent, my lawyer, the hotel I will be staying at..."

"Right, I--"

"And this is their schedule. It is very important that you stick to it! Especially this week. Purple will get very upset if things change too much, so make sure they are able to get to all of their activities. Orange has ballet on Tuesdays and Thursdays and art classes on Mondays. He and the twins also have gymnastics on Fridays. They all do martial arts together during the weekends. Oh, and Red just started clarinet lessons, so make sure he is practicing!"

"Okay, I'll--"

"And do not let them convince you that they are allowed onto the roof! They are not! And do not let Donatello take the toaster into his room, under any circumstances! And--"

"Mr. Hamato!" 

Yoshi paused in his long-winded explanation, blinking widely at the flustered-looking babysitter, whose face was pink.

"Sorry! Sorry, I don't mean to, uh, interrupt, but..." She offered him a somewhat nervous smile. "I promise I've reviewed all the paperwork you sent. I've got their schedules saved, all the numbers are already in my phone, and I reached out to Adam to introduce myself and coordinate everything for the week already," she assured, referring to the young man Yoshi had hired years ago to help taxi his children about the city and get them to all their various after-school activities. Yoshi swore, every other month, one of them would try something new on a whim (usually a sport of some kind,) only to discover yet another innate aptitude and then beg to start taking classes. Adam was something of a cross between a chauffeur and a babysitter, helping to cart kids to and from various lessons and clubs when Yoshi couldn't do it himself. Yoshi would have happily hired him to babysit for the coming week, but unfortunately his college classes kept him too busy for such a commitment. Likewise, he would have liked to leave them in the O'Neil's care, but with both parents working full-time, they had concluded that the Hamato childrens’ demanding schedule would leave them a bit out of their depth. 

And so he had hired Emily.

It was not the first time he had hired Emily. Emily had babysat for him in the past whenever he needed someone to watch some or all of the boys. But never for more than a day. Never overnight. Certainly not for a full week.

"Right. Of course," Yoshi laughed nervously, pinching the bridge of his nose slightly. "My apologies. A week is just… a long time."

"I know. But we'll call every evening!"

"Yes, yes," he sighed a bit. "... Right. You are perfectly capable! I'm sure you will be fine!" He said, his voice a bit clipped. "And if you have any questions, you can call! I will have my cell phone on me!"

"Of course!" She assured with a gentle smile, beginning to gather up and organize all the various papers and forms Yoshi had provided her, making one last final review before he took his leave. Yoshi sighed deeply, glancing down at his watch. He could only afford to drag his feet for so much longer before he missed his flight. Emily politely kept herself busy and pretended not to notice him reorganizing his suitcase four different times before he finally zipped it up for good, leaving it by the front door.

"Boys!" He called. In a similar fashion to him pretending not to be stalling his inevitable exit, they pretended like they had not been hiding in just the next room, trying to eavesdrop on the two adults. They were all gathered up at his feet in a snap, with Mikey leading the charge and Donnie lagging behind, and Yoshi kneeled down to meet them.

"Alright, my sons. I will talk to you all on the phone later tonight. Be good for Emily while I am gone, understand? I have already told her she is allowed to sell you to the zoo if you are not good listeners, so best behavior!"

This got a giggle out of at least half of them, so he'd count that as a win. Mikey wrapped his arms around Yoshi's neck, tugging at him slightly and pulling himself up so he could climb on him, clinging to his neck. Yoshi thought to himself that he was starting to get too big to keep using him as a jungle gym, but… there was still time. He wasn’t too big yet. At least not today.

"Where are you going again, Daddy?"

"To California."

"How far away is that?"

"Hmmm," Yoshi pretended to think. "Well. It is farther than New Jersey. But it is closer than Japan." 

"Do we get to watch your new movie when you get home?" Leo demanded, leaning on his father's knee. "I wanna show everyone at school! Justin didn't believe me when I said you were gonna go make a movie!"

"It will take a little longer than that, Blue," he laughed. "But we can all watch together when they are finished making it. In the meantime, make them watch The Rabbit Bodyguard. I was very cool in that one." This new job wasn't actually a very large role-- there was no way he could film in only a week otherwise-- but he felt no need to explain that to Leonardo, who was absolutely beaming, giving a nod of affirmation.

"Are you sure it's gonna be a whole week?" Raph fret, his mouth curved into a frown.

"Yes, Red, I am sure. But you boys will be so busy with Emily you will not even notice I'm gone!"

"Yeah we will," Raph muttered, crossing his arms. 

"Oh, but you boys have so many activities!" He declared dramatically, before leaning into Raph, almost conspiring, to stage-whisper to him. "I did not want to say it in front of Emily, but I think she may need your help, Raphael. She is not used to how busy you boys all are. Or dealing with your little akuma-chan brothers! You may have to help make sure everything goes smoothly while I am gone."

"Hey!" Leo protested.

Raphael glanced over at Emily from across the living room, where she was still organizing papers in the kitchen, before turning back to Yoshi and giving a firm nod. Mission accepted. Phew. Yoshi knew he would be far less anxious over the coming week if he was instead focused on time management and keeping his brothers in line. 

"Why can't we come with you?" Leo questioned, sulking slightly. "I wanna go to Hollywood!"

"Akuma-chan children are not allowed in the state of California. It is against federal law," he replied easily.

"That's not true!" Leo protested.

"It is. Only the best-behaved children are allowed to go to California. You have to submit an application. With referrals from teachers and babysitters saying you should get to go in," he explained confidently. "Perhaps if you boys are very good, then we can take a trip there someday..."

"And see Hollywood?"

"Yes, and see Hollywood."

"And sea lions?!" Mikey squealed. 

"Yes, sea lions as well."

"Okay!" The two agreed, and Yoshi smiled a tiny bit to himself. They were getting older now, and he doubted that Leo actually believed the story he was weaving, though Mikey might. But Yoshi would be hard-pressed to find any joke, game, or bit that Leo wasn't willing to play along with.

He gave Raph a tight hug, assuring his oldest that he trusted him to keep an eye on the family in his absence, that Emily would take good care of them, and that he would be home soon. He scooped up Leo next, agreeing to all his demands for souvenirs, and promising that he would, in fact, call every day. He squeezed Mikey close, and confirmed that yes, Emily did know how to make all the foods they liked, and she would play with them and give hugs, and that Daddy would come back home as soon as he could, for sure, he promised. 

 Donatello was last, still lingering to the side even after his brothers had all turned their attention to Emily instead, staring down at his feet.

"Purple," Yoshi bade softly. Donnie grunted in response.

"I will be coming back home on the 11th. My flight is at 4:15 PM in California time. It's flight 983. And today's flight is 212. You and your brothers can track it on the computer if you want." 

Donnie nodded a tiny bit, not yet looking up.

"I will call you all every night at bedtime. And you can always ask Emily to call me if you need me. Even if I don't pick up right away, I will call you back." 

Donnie hummed quietly, shuffling his feet.

"And Emily is going to take very good care of you boys. You like Emily, don’t you? She has watched you before. And I know you like it when she performs the musical parts of movies with you. And she lets you ask her questions about her architecture degree. And she knows how to do you boys' hair better than I do," he smiled softly. "So you will even get to have special things this week."

Donnie wrinkled up his nose, swaying back and forth for a bit before he finally signed.

'Stay.'

Yoshi sighed.

"I can't stay, Donnie. I have to go to work. Just like April’s parents have to go to work. But I will come back. I promise. It will only be a week, and then I will be back, okay?" He hummed softly, leaning in close. "But I know you will be okay while I'm gone. You and your brothers are going to take care of each other. And April and her parents will help take care of you, too. You will still see her all this week and get to play with her. And you will still get to go to school, and to see Mossy, and to go to robotics club and gymnastics and all the other things you like. Even if I'm not here, you and your brothers will be okay. I am sure of it."

Donnie sniffled a bit, screwing up his face for a moment before he finally moved, all but bodily walking into his father, burying his face against his chest and curling up against him. Yoshi wrapped his arms around him tight, giving him a squeeze.

"Promise you'll come back?" He whispered.

"Of course I will," Yoshi whispered in reply. "I promise I will come back."

---

"I never get to use my algorithms..." Donnie sighed very softly, looking longingly at the spreadsheet on his phone as they trudged through the alleys of the city. And after Mikey had gotten all this data for him, too...

"Donnie. This is a good thing," Leo said, raising a brow and giving his brother a look. "Finding Dad was our goal, remember?"

"Yeah. I know," Donnie sighed, slumping a tiny bit. "But must science always be on the backburner?!"

"Aw, cheer up, Dee!" Mikey chirped, nudging his brother gently with an elbow as he trotted along. "I'm sure you can come up with some sort of mystic-scanning machine to put in your goggles or whatever after we get Dad back!"

"Yes, yes, I will add it to my itinerary," he sighed, rolling his shoulders slightly as they marched. "How much farther do we have to go to find this hidden doorway anyway, April? I thought you said it was close."

"Chill. We're almost there. Uh. I think," April said.

"You think?"

“Look, I've never located a secret mystic doorway before, okay?" She huffed, scowling at her younger brother. "Sunita’s directions were clear in theory, but in practice, it's a little more complicated! If you wanna take a turn leading, then be my guest...!"

"Don't worry! I'm sure we'll find it!" Mikey encouraged, bounding over to match April's pace and fall into stride next to her, a bright grin lighting up his face. He had practically been bouncing around like a kangaroo ever since they left the skatepark, overflowing with hopeful excitement. "There's no way anything can stop us now when we're this close to getting Pops back!"

"Right... and what's our plan again, when we do find this supposed secret doorway?" Donnie questioned, arching a brow.

"Ninja in, kick some yokai butt, rescue Dad, and ninja out," Leo supplied with a shrug. "Simple!"

"Exactly!" Raph agreed. "We know where Dad is-- so we go get him! He needs us! You guys just be careful and let Raph do all the smashing, and we'll be fine."

"Right..." Donnie mumbled, rolling his eyes a bit. Note to self: do not join any action squads with his brothers in the future. Risk of serious injury or untimely death: high. “In any case, we should still, at the very least, come up with some contingencies should we get separated or anything else go awry. We’re heading into unknown and supposedly magical territory, most likely populated with a bunch of yokai creatures, apparently half of which are criminals, so who knows what we may run into. So it may be wise to all be in agreement as to what we’re doing should anything happen--”

“That would be wise,” agreed a voice from behind the group-- far too deep and foreign to be any of his siblings. Donnie froze, a chill latching onto his spine, and he felt his family do the same before collectively turning to face the stranger.

“I knew you would have to come out of that apartment eventually,” the yokai observed, tilting their chin to look down at them through the glassy screen of their horned helmet-- eyes slitted, mouth fanged, their hair long and magenta, tall and familiar and terrifying. Donnie tensed.

“I’ve been hoping to get a chance to speak with you four.”

[ next ]

[extreme-unorthodox-cuddles]

HEY YOU!

YEAH YOU I'M TALKING TO YO-

No this isn't an infomercial.

Have you ever felt tired, but no matter what you do or where you try to relax, you just can't seem to rest? Nothing is ever quite comfortable enough? Or maybe you feel like there's just something missing?

INTRODU-

I already told you, this isn't an infomercial, I swear.

INTRODUCING:

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Whatever. *Ahem*, Anyway...

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What terms and conditions? Seriously who wrote this?

Hey you've been quiet for quite a while now are you o- oh they're gone.

This was a stupid idea why did I agree to this

[sparklypinkflightsuit]

Drugs, Thugs and Pilot Kelson Hugs: Part 3

Pairing: Pilot Kelson x Reader

Warnings: Smut, Sexual Themes, Drugs, Alcohol, Swearing, Violence, Cheating

Summary: Quite a smutty chapter, with also a lil bit of fluff.

- Part 2 Here -

——————————

18+ Only beyond this point

——————————————

The day after the work event, you went to see Zack, and you apologised for the misunderstanding a few nights before, but ultimately made him aware you could no longer see him. In his sober state he took it well and apologised to you for how he acted.

You felt lighter leaving his apartment and the week that passed went well. You got a lot of compliments at work about the cute guy you brought to the event and they asked if you were together. You explained you were just friends, but your colleagues hardly believed you.

That weekend you’d opted to stay at home, the last few weeks having exhausted you. You showered and then threw on an oversized T-shirt over your panties before sitting down on the sofa, finally relaxing while watching your favourite movie.

Your mind kept going back to the work event, your fingers running over Pilots hairy chest, the soft moans he made, his lust filled eyes. You felt yourself struggling to focus on your movie.

About halfway through, there was a loud knock on your door. You weren’t expecting anyone so you got up and looked through the peep hole. Your heart jumped, and you opened the door a crack, hiding your bare legs.

“Pilot? What are you doing here?” You asked, surprised.

“Hey… I felt weird leaving things how they were the other night. Can I come in?” He asked.

“Uhhh… yeah just gimme two minutes?” You asked, he nodded with a smile.

You ran off and threw on a pair of shorts before coming back to unbolt the door.

“Come in.” You smiled, stepping aside.

Pilot walked into your apartment and looked around. Your apartment was neat and bright and smelled nice.

He turned to face you as you closed the door.

“You look pretty.” He said, hands in his pockets. Your hair was down and slightly messy, you were free of makeup and in a big T-shirt. You certainly didn’t feel pretty.

“Thanks.” You said coyly, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. “You don’t need to feel weird about the other night, I had a great time. I think maybe I’m the one that made it weird.” You admitted.

“No you didn’t, I was… I really liked.. being there with you.” He said stepping closer slowly.

“You did?” You smiled, leaning up against the back wall of your hallway.

He nodded. “I actually wanted to tell you something, but I’m kinda nervous about it.” He bit his lip.

“What is it?” Your heart was colliding with your chest, as Pilot stood over you. His hand gently moved to your waist, his fingers sliding gingerly underneath your T-shirt and skimming your bare skin.

You pulled in a sharp breath as you waited for him to continue. Pilot thought for a moment, before his fingers flattened on your lower back and his thumb came round to rest on your stomach.

He took a deep breath as he looked at your lips and then into your eyes.

“I wanted to tell you… that when I touch you, it feels like an electric current running through my veins.” He mumbled lowly, his eyes moving back to your lips. “And when you look at me, my skin burns, but in the most incredible way.” His other hand moved to your hand that dangled freely next to you and tangled his fingers in yours.

“And when you speak, my ears ring so loudly that sometimes I can’t hear what you’re saying.” He chuckled, “but the ringing makes me dizzy… drunk… like I don’t want it to stop. Like I don’t want you to stop.” He leaned closer, his face inches from yours.

“And when I look at you… when I really look at you, I feel like my heart might explode. I don’t think my body can handle it for much longer.” He whispered, his lips skimming yours, and suddenly you couldn’t take it anymore.

You pushed up on your tiptoes and kissed Pilot with such hunger that it surprised him, but he moaned and kissed you back, pushing you gently up against the wall.

The hand on your waist moved up over your ribs slowly. Your hands both came up to tangle in his messy hair, and you whimpered into the kiss when his body pressed firmly against yours.

His hand gently slid up until his thumb caressed your under boob. He groaned as he realised you weren’t wearing a bra.

You kissed him desperately, tugging on his hair gently. You bit his bottom lip and he shivered, his free hand tugging on your shorts. You complied and slid them off, leaving you back in your underwear and T-shirt. His hand ran softly up your thigh before sliding back to grip your ass firmly. You jumped and he lifted you up to wrap your legs around him. You licked his bottom lip, and he opened his mouth allowing you access.

Your tongues explored one another before Pilot broke away and began feverishly kissing your neck, sucking wet marks into your skin.

His pupils were blown and you imagined yours were too as you pulled back for a second to look at one another.

“Take these off.” You said, tugging at his jeans. He complied and quickly removed them, kicking them across the room, followed by his T-shirt. He quickly went back to kissing your neck as he gingerly explored your body with his hands.

Finally, his hand cupped your boob, and you moaned, your back arching into his touch.

“Fuck..” he breathed, absolutely filled with lust and unable to contain himself any longer. He kissed you deeply and then pulled your T-shirt over your head. He admired your body, pinned up against the wall as you panted, desperate for him to continue.

He kissed you again, harder and hungrier this time, one hand on your ass and the other pulling his underwear down before moving yours to the side.

He slowly entered you, inch by inch. You both moaned and bucked into one another at the feeling, your bodies flush as his length stretched you out.

“God, fuck yes..” you cried, throwing your head back, back arching as he thrust into you slowly. Pilot’s mouth hung open as he watched you, unable to get over the sight in front of him. His pace began to quicken as he lost all control, eyes rolling to the back of his head. Your bodies crashed loudly against the hollow wall and the grunting and moaning noises coming from both of you only spurred you on.

You tugged on his hair as you bucked into him, and he dipped his head so he could take your nipple into his mouth. He gently nipped you, moving one of his hands to rub your clit in small circles.

You threw your head back as you felt yourself coming, your breathing irregular and shallow, tightening around Pilot’s big shaft.

“Oh shit!” He cried as he felt you tighten, feeling himself going over the edge. He pumped faster, moving a hand to the back of your neck, he kissed you passionately as he let loose, his load filling you up, leaking out of you as his pumping slowed to a halt.

You both panted heavily against one another, you still pinned up against the wall. You were both slick with sweat and your underwear now soaked.

You both chuckled breathlessly, and Pilot gently pulled out of you and lowered you to the ground.

Pilot kissed you softly this time, his arm wrapping around your waist and pulling you against him.

“I have never… ever… experienced anything like that before.” He breathed.

“Can’t say I have either.” You laughed, caressing his sweaty face. “Shower with me?”

———————————————

Pilot stayed at yours that night, and you spent most of your time on the couch, laying inbetween his legs. You spoke about deep things, like his childhood and your life before Vegas. You spoke about what you wanted from life and how Pilot still wasn’t sure what direction his was going in.

You had sex again, on the couch this time, and you rode him until his eyes rolled into the back of his head. Afterwards you lay on his chest and his hands gently explored your every curve. You kissed so much that your lips became swollen, and your bodies sensitive from the constant touching, yet you couldn’t bring yourselves to stop.

Over the next few days, you and Pilot found every opportunity to see one another. He showed up at your work and you snuck him into the bathroom to make out. He knocked on your door late at night, not leaving until the next morning.

By day 8 of your ‘courtship’, while you showered together, hands exploring one another, Pilot suddenly stopped and stared at you under the warm stream of water.

He cupped your cheek and gazed at you lovingly.

“Are we like… together together or?” He questioned, you laughed.

“I don’t know Pilot, what do you wanna be?” You said, kissing his chest.

“I wanna be together together. I wanna be yours only.” He admitted, so serious it made your insides clench. You nodded and stood on your toes to kiss him.

“Then that’s what we’ll be. I promise to be yours and only yours, as long as you promise me the same thing.”

He smiled, his forehead resting on yours, water running down your faces. “You know I’m all yours, (Y/N), there’s nobody else for me.”

Your relationship grew over the weeks, going from strength to strength. Everyone was sick of the two of you and the constant gooey looks you gave one another from across rooms. If it wasn’t that, you couldn’t keep your hands off of one another. Pilot was always kissing you, holding you or trying to dance with you, it was your cute little thing.

One night however, everything was about to change. Someone had noticed Pilot, and once she had her eyes on him, she wasn’t willing to let go so easily.

You were at the bar with your usual group, and Lucy, Pilots ex girlfriend from 7 years prior, noticed you all standing around the bar. She had come out for her best friends bachelorette party and immediately recognised the familiar, handsome face.

Lucy had grown her hair out and looked good, but was nowhere near on your level. You were the girl of Pilot’s dreams, but what you didn’t have in your favour was Lucy’s newfound determination.

Over the years she had learnt to get exactly what she wanted, and she was fierce about it.

Walking over to where you and Pilot stood, his arm draped over your shoulder as you laughed about something, Lucy cleared her throat.

“Well well well. If it isn’t Pilot Kelson himself.” She smirked, crossing her arms to push out her breasts.

Pilots smile fell from his face as he stood upright.

“Hi Lucy, it’s been a while.” He said awkwardly. You looked between the two of them before sticking out your hand and trying introducing yourself politely.

“Hi! I’m (Y/N).” You said, shaking her hand.

“Ah yeah, sorry baby, this is Lucy, my ex. Lucy this is (Y/N), my girlfriend.” He said, reintroducing you two properly. He looked tense, and the smirk on Lucy’s face made you uncomfortable.

“Nice to meet you Lucy. I need to use the bathroom, why don’t you two catch up and I’ll meet you back here?” You smiled. Pilot tried to stop you but you decided they needed to quash whatever weird tension there was and you wanted to give them the time to do so.

You pulled Carly and Cassie with you to the bathroom to tell them about the weird encounter. Cassie laughed and told you not to worry, she had briefly met Lucy once years ago right before they broke up, and she was nothing to worry about, a nice girl apparently. You felt better as you fixed your makeup in the bathroom mirror. You trusted Pilot, you knew how he felt about you, it was hard not to see it.

Once you were all finished in the bathroom, you made your way back out into the busy bar. Your eyes scanned the room for Pilot but he and Lucy were nowhere to be seen.

You walked around trying to find any sign of them, eventually deciding to try outside. You gestured across the bar at Carly to let her know where you were going and she gave you a thumbs up.

You squeezed past the sweaty, drunken patrons and out into the fresh, cool air, taking a deep breath, which was immediately knocked out of you when you saw what was unfolding in front of you.

“Pilot?” You cried.

———————————————

- Part 4 Here -