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just-random-obsessions · 4 years ago

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Funny Moments In Thor Ragnarök

Thor 1

Thor 2

Avengers 1

I know I said I was gonna do Avengers Age of Ultron too, but because it didn’t have Loki in it, I decided to scrap that idea because this series is mostly focused on the relationship between Loki and Thor. So without further ado, all the funny moments in Thor Ragnarök. Side note: This accounts for all the moments were SUPPOSED to be funny. However these are mostly toilet humor, so whether or not it was actually funny to the viewer just depends on that person’s taste in humor. Funny moments listed below cut line which is underneath the tag list.

Edit for clarification: This is not a post supporting Thor Ragnarok. This is an anti post. In another post (that I’m too lazy to write right now) I will be explaining the difference in humor tones between this movie and the previous three. I will also be explaining why this tonal change is hated by anti Ragnarok people.

Tag List: @fyrecrafted @lokijiro @nikkoliferous @miskiett @icyxmischief @iamanartichoke @juliabohemian @official-and-unstable-satan @darthxerik @melodylnoelle @just-another-human-2019 @fandomsandfanfictions @mentallydatingahotcelebrity @cateyes315 @burningarbiterheart @imnotacreepijustlikeyou @usedtobegoodfriend96 @alexakeyloveloki

~ “Where I met you :)” *skeleton’s jaw drops*

~ “Surtr. Son of...a bitch you’re still alive?!”

~ *The chain keeps spinning Thor around and interrupting Surtr

~ “And you’ll grow as big as a house-?” “A mOuNtAiN”

~ “Oh that’s a crown. I thought it was a big eyebrow”

~ *Thor’s timing being wrong when he says “that’s what heroes do”

~ “oh I make grave mistakes all the time. Everything seems- *shit that’s a bg dragon* -to work out”

~ “Behold!!! My stuff!

~ *Pronounces Texas wrong*

~ “I call them Des and Troy. Together, they Destroy”

~ *Thor drops the hammer in the dragon’s mouth* “Stay!”

~ *The entire Asgardian play*

~ *The woman in the audience emotionally grabbing Thor’s arm*

~ *Thor being all wtf???*

~ “Father” “Oh shit”

~ *that smile!!!*

~ *Out of breath* “Behold!! Thor! Odinso-” “You had one job”

~ “I swear I left him right here” “right here on the sidewalk or right here where the building’s being demolished?”

~ “Can’t see into the future. I’m not a witch” “No? Then why do you dress like one?” “hEy!!!1!!!1!!”

~ “I can’t believe you’re alive. I mourned you! I cried for you!” “I’m honored??”

~ *the two girls who approach Thor to take a selfie*

~ “Sorry to hear that Jane dumped you” “She didn’t dump me. I dumped her. It was a mutual dumping”

~ *Thor poking the piece of paper cause he thinks it’s Loki*

~ “You can put down the umbrella”

~ “So Earth has wizards now” “The preferred term is Master of the Mystic Arts” “Alright wizard”

~ *Thor fumbling with the cool spikey things*

~ “I don’t drink tea” “Well what do you drink?” “Not tea”

~*the self-refilling beer*

~ “No I don’t have a phone but you could’ve sent an electronic letter. It’s called an email” “Right do you have a computer?” “No what for?” *confusion*

~ “My hair is not to be meddled with-OW!!!!”

~ “We could’ve just walked”

~ “Don’t forget your umbrella” *the awkwardness between them as everything crashes*

~ “I hAvE bEeN fAlLiNg FoR tHiRtY mInUtEs!!!!1!!1!!!!”

~ I’m pretty sure Odin’s death scene was the only scene to not have any humor in it.

~ “Who are you?” “I’m just the janitor”

~ *Valkyrie tries to do the Badass Walk but falls off the edge*

~ *Val keeps stumbling*

~ “But we’ve already got him” “Alright then. I guess I go through you”

~ *The guns not working at first*

~ *Val’s smirk*

~ *Thor’s mashed up face on the window of the ship*

~ “Whoever you are.” “Whoever I am?! Did you listen to a word I said?!”

~ *Thor’s scared screaming turned into a confused and awkward screaming as he is introduced to the Grandmaster*

~ “He’s wonderful. It is a he?” “It is a he”

~ “She is the- and it starts with a b” “Trash” “Were you just waiting to call her that? It doesn’t start with a b” “Booze-head”

~ “You’ll pay for this” “No I got payed for this”

~ “I am the god of THUNDER” *sparkles*

~ “OH MY GOD I’m stepping in it!!!”

~ “I’m going back to Asgard.” “Assgard?”

~ “Loki!” “Shhh!”

~ *Loki and Thor start arguing*

~ “Get me out!” “I can’t!” “Get me out!” “I can’t!”

~ “I’ve never met this man in my life” “He’s my brother” “Adopted”

~ “Let me introduce myself my name is Korg. I’m kinda like the leader in here”

~ “I tried to start a revolutions but I didn’t print enough pamphlets”

~ “Oh no. Doug’s dead”

~ “That’s exactly what Doug used to say. See you later New Doug”

~ Infinity Gauntlet: “Fake!!”

~ Casket: “Weak!”

~ Surtr’s Crown: “Smaller than I though it would be”

~ *Thor throwing rocks at Loki*

~ “Piss off ghost!!”

~ “It would pull me off-” “Oh my god. The hammer pulled you off?”

~ *Thor fumbling with talkin to Val and doing the thumbs up*

~ “By Odin’s beard you shall not cut my hair” *2 seconds later* “Please kind sir do not cut my hair”

~ “I have to get off this planet”

~ “Loki! Look who it is!” *NOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENO

PENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPE

NOPENOPENOPENOPE

~ *Thor gets whacked around like Loki did in Avengers* “YES!!! THATS HOW IT FEELS*

~ “Not just to execute people, but also to execute their vision. But mainly to execute people”

~ *Hulk being naked in the hot tub* “That’s in my brain now”

~ “What are you crazy?!” “YES”

~ “Hulk like fire. Thor like water”

~ *Thor stumbling around Val again*

~ “Because that’s what heroes-” *gets bonked in the head with the ball*

~ *the voice activation being “Point Break”*

~ “What happened to your hair?” “Some creepy old man cut it off” “It looks good”

~ “Banner” “Welcom strongest Avenger” “Uhhh what?”

~ “You and I had a fight “ “Did I win?” “No I won” “That doesn’t sound right”

~ *Topaz trying to hand the Grandmaster the meltsick*

~ “I don’t wanna fight your sister that’s a family issue”

~ *Thor and Bruce arguing like children*

~ “It’s my disguise” “I can see your face” “Not when I do this”

~ *Bruce complimenting Valkyrie*

~ *Thor stealing the name Revengers from the Avengers*

~ “Where are you at these days?” “It varies from moment to moment” *NOPE*

~ “We are going through the big one” “The Devil’s Anus?!”

~ “I’m asking for safe passage. Through the Anus”

~ *The snake story*

~ “You guys have a beast :D?!!!!”

~ *”I’ll explain later”*

~ “I don’t like that word” “Mainframe?”

~ *Thor and Loki step out of the elevator* “Hello” “Hi”

~ *get help*

~ “Alright I can figure this out it’s just another spaceship”

~ “Did she just say the Grandmaster uses it for orgies?!!” “Yeah. Don’t touch anything”

~ “Use one of your PhD’s” “None of them aRe FoR FLYING ALIEN SPACESHIPS”

~ “Well you do seem like you’re in desperate need of leadership” “Why thank you”

~ “Not that [Asgard’s] not nice it’s just that it’s on fire”

~ “I love what you’ve done with the place. Redecorating I see”

~ *heroic music plays* *Bruce falls flat on his face*

~ “I’m Korg. This is Miek. We’re gonna jump on that spaceship. Wanna come?”

~ “Your savior is here!!! Did you miss me?”

~ “You’re late” “You’re missing an eye”

~ “I think we should disband the Revengers”

~ “Hit her with a lightning blast” “I just hit her with the biggest lightning blast in the history of lightning”

~ “So what do we do?” “I’m not doing Get Help”

~ “You can’t defeat me” “I know. But he can”

~ “We’re fulfilling the prophecy” “I hate this prophecy”

~ “For once in your life! Don’t smash!” “Big monster?!”

~ “It will become a haven-” *Asgard explodes* “Yeah no sorry”

~ “Oh Mieks dead. Yeah I stomped on him on the bridge. I felt so guilty I’ve been carrying him around all day.” *2 seconds later* “Oh Miek you’re alive!! He;s alive guys!! What was your question?”

~ “Do you really think it’s a good idea to go back to earth?” “Yes of course, the people of Earth love me”

I FINALLY FINISHED IT!!!!!

#that took forever to do too #Anti Chris Odinson #anti chris hemsworth #anti-ragnarok #anti ragnarok #anti thor ragnarok #anti taika waititi #im finally finished!!!!!!

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btssmutficslovingfan01 · 5 years ago

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King of Love (Oneshot)

Summary: Ironically enough, the well known “king of love,” (Kim Seokjin) a popular matchmaker during the 1970’s, has a non existent love life but then he gets sent into the future, where he meets the love of his life.

Promised I’d release this! Wait no longer, sry if it’s bad/cringe I’m still new to writing bxb.

Pairing: Jin x (Male) Reader

Genre: Time Travel, Non-idol au, Fluff, Smut, Slight Angst

Warnings: Sir kink, creampie, fingering, blowjob, anal, Dom! Seokjin, Sub! Reader

Words: 4k+

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“You’re a star, Seokjin. A real star.” The happy couple walks out, hand in hand.

“You’ve done it again, you made them happy,” His assistant walks into the office, his short blond hair neatly trimmed. “And me.” The young man beams at his boss, as he takes a seat in his swivel chair in the corner and spins around.

“I take it the ring is a good sign?” Jin smirks at the blushing blond.

“Yeah. Yoongi’s treating me real well.” He replies under his breath.

“Promise rings this early? Wow, you must really like each other.” Jin stamps his paper, and he pushes his glasses further up the bridge of his nose.

“We do. I know we can’t have this kind of relationship in public but it’s thanks to you that I was even able to tell him how I felt in the first place. You’re so cool, Jin.” His assistant’s praise makes his cheeks turn pink and his eyes form small half-moons as he looks in the direction of the blond.

“You’re even cooler for finding clients and promoting me through your dad’s company.” Jin’s compliment has the man in tears, crying from joy. His dimples are fully visible under the dim-lit room as he smiles wide enough for the United States to see his shiny white teeth.

“Seriously, thanks a lot, Jin hyung.” The man locks eyes with him, just as his boyfriend walks in through the door.

“Yoongi,” He smiles at the older man, as he walks in through the door.

“Seokjin. I see that you’ve certainly taken your work to another level,” Yoongi kicks aside a file from a previous client aside. “Perhaps this is too much, why don’t you take a break and try finding someone for yourself?” Jin freezes at the comment. He’d definitely thought of dating way back before he even became a matchmaker, but nothing worked out for him. All of the men he approached just ran away claiming he was too “narcissistic” and “self absorbed.” He loves himself, but every single guy he meets says he’s too selfish. So what? He has a stable career, money, a house, and a snazzy new car. He doesn’t need to date to be happy. But he has to admit, seeing his friends in love and holding hands and stealing kisses is kinda cute. Just a little bit. But nothing Jin wanted for himself-he just wanted to see people in love with his efforts, of course. Whether it’s a man or woman, a man and another man, or two women, Jin tries to keep everything fair and equal within his office. That’s why he has such high ratings. He has even been scouted by tv show producers to film a reality show about him, but he wanted to keep his business low on the radar, since some of what he was doing was illegal. He helped people run away before, and start lives anew. He’s even helped a couple prisoners escape, but that was only because he knew they were innocent. Seokjin is a good man. And his friends wanted someone else to see that too. A special person to change his life for the better

“I appreciate your concern, Yoongi. But I simply don’t have any interest in dating right now. Look at this, all of this research! Not only am I matchmaker, but I am also documenting human behavior. This is a study, Yoongi. I’d like nothing more than to dedicate the rest of my life to research.” Yoongi gawks at his friend as he sits down and begins scanning the papers, taking up every single detail with his eyes and ignoring him in the process.

“Let’s go have dinner. It’s getting late.” The younger man looks down at his worried boyfriend as he grabs his arms.

“This isn’t good for him. The King of Love not having a partner? It’s a bad image, Joon, a bad one I’m telling you!” Namjoon interrupts him with an abrupt kiss. Yoongi blushes before being dragged away from the office, to a nearby restaurant.

“He’s right, you know?” A deep voice resounds through the room.

“Taehyung? What are you doing here?” Jin looks at his younger brother as the man with wondrous grey eyes strolls into the office.

“I’m trying to convince you to get some pussy. Leave before it gets too dark. You know how there’s a curfew now.” His eyes darken as he takes a breath and grabs a folder from the desk.

“That can’t be the reason why you’re here.”

“You’re right. Give me some money,” Seokjin raises an eyebrow at his brother in disbelief. “Just kidding, I just wanted to see you again.” He smiles warmly and Jin sighs in relief. He almost panicked for a moment; almost.

“Aw, you’re so cute for coming to see my handsome face today, but I have to really work on this report, alright?” When Taehyung refuses to move, Jin stands up and starts pushing him, trying to get the younger male to leave the room. “I’ll...talk...to...you...when...I...get...home.” Jin gasps for air after he practically pushed his brother out, surprised by the brute force of the man. He was not aware of Taehyung’s raw power. He must’ve bulked up a lot more from the last time they saw each other.

He sits back down at his desk and begins writing.

“Love is not over until the two parties decide it is officially over. Even when broken up, a boyfriend may still possess some sort of control over his former girlfriend and they go through this phase of denial where neither of them want to admit that they are still in love while they are trying to move on.” He sighs before writing again. “The proper way to break off a relationship is by healing. People may use this time to talk to new people, explore their life as a single person, etc. However, it is never good to distance oneself fully. People are usually attracted to someone they see a lot, perhaps a coworker or classmate. But then they are less likely to be attracted to someone they don’t see very much. Distancing oneself from their ex-lover requires discipline, and harmony between the body and mind. They must be able to stand in the same room without feeling anything. Most issues arise in a breakup when two partners physically separate themselves for a period of time right after the breakup, but then when they see each other after that, the feelings come back. All of the moments and precious feelings arise and they both are back at square one. But then they must consider the reason for why they broke up. Was it worth it? Was it unhealthy? They need to know what’s best for them, individually, and grow from there.” Seokjin yawns as he finishes writing his 45 minute piece, setting his pen down and resting his head on the surface of his hard wooden desk. He closes his eyes briefly, seeing a flicker of light from the corner of his eye.

He sees it again, except this time it’s brighter, bluer, clearer. He stands up, inching towards the door that leads to the hallway. He opens it, finding a man standing directly outside of his room, one hand up, his palm facing Seokjin. Blue dust surrounds him, glittering magically and making Jin’s eyes widen in awe. He looks up and recognizes the face.

“Again, I’ll say it--you need a boyfriend.” Yoongi pushes his palm towards Jin, and Seokjin is thrusted against the wall, his head thudding against the wall as he sank deeper and deeper into the floor.

Seokjin awakens to find himself right outside of his office, except it’s a lot more different now. The hallway is cleaner, and there are more people. The first thing he notices is that the door no longer says “Kim Seokjin.” It says “Men’s Restroom.” What could Jin be doing in front of a bathroom? He remembers the weird flash of light outside of his office and then he woke up here. He shrugs and begins to walk towards the waiting room, where his next clients would be waiting. He doesn’t bother with changing or brushing his teeth; he is a very busy man.

“Mr. Ford, your appointment is scheduled for Saturday, the 14th.” He overhears a receptionist speaking. That’s strange, he didn’t recall hiring a woman on staff.

“Thank you, I will see you then, Linda.” Linda? He doesn’t know anyone with that name.

“Y/N?” He sees you look up at the sound of your own name, as you quickly pick up your book before running to the desk.

“You said they do therapy here, right? Like not massages, but with a chaise, and a person to talk to?” Jin listens in on the conversation, hiding behind a plant.

“Yes, uhhhh, let’s see, Dr. Harry is busy, and so is Patricia, let me see if-”

“I’ll take him!” Jin finds himself moving before even thinking. “Dr. Seokjin, I’m a local therapist working in...Kim Enterprises.”

“Never heard of a Dr. Seokjin.” The receptionist simply blinks twice before nodding. “Okay, you can go.” She slightly winks at him before letting him walk you towards the direction of his old office.

“Um, do you work here?” You ask.

“Yes. I’m actually a matchmaker, but I also study human behavior.” He truthfully explains it to you.

“Thanks for agreeing to help me. I’ve just been stressed about life, you know?” Jin nods, as he guides you to a seemingly empty room, with a bed, a chair, and a setup of a typical Doctor’s office.

“Lie down here. You can tell me about your troubles. Everything is confidential and safe with me.” Jin reassures you. You simply give him a smile and follow his instructions.

“Let me see...so my day started out great but then my mom called me and told me about how she’s disappointed that she had a son like me and she wishes she had a daughter instead, and then my father stole some money from me last month, that was bad. And just a couple hours ago, I found out that my best friend died in a car accident.” Jin’s eyes widen as you pour out your feelings. He’s mostly surprised with the trust you have in him, as if you already know what kind of person he is and enough about him to tell him all of these private things.

“I’m sorry. On a scale of one to ten, one being the best and ten being the worst, how do you feel right now, emotionally?” Your eyes glistening with tears as you try not to cry.

“Ten thousand,” Jin wipes a couple of your tears before reaching into his pocket and handing you a handkerchief. “You have a custom handkerchief?” You ask him after realizing his initials were stitched into the fabric.

“Yep. I always carry it, it’s like my good luck charm.” He winks at you as you laugh, the direness of the moment wearing off as you speak to Jin.

“I wish I had something like that. So, didn’t you say you were a matchmaker?” You try changing the subject, now focusing more on the incredibly handsome man in front of you.

“Yes, I am. I normally help clients get the person of their desires, confess, or sometimes, even mend struggling relationships.”

“That sounds like a bunch of jobs smushed together.” You tap your chin as you fall deep in thought.

“It’s the 70’s, so they have one person do all the doctor’s work.” Seokjin gives you another charming smile.

“Haha, you might be right about the doctor’s wor—wait did you say 70’s?” You ask, making sure you weren’t tripping on acid.

“Yes. Is there something wrong, Sir?” He asks, his tongue running along his plump lips.

“It’s 2019. Why are you referencing the 70’s out of nowhere?” Jin’s face turns as white as a sheet. He looks like a ghost. You watch as the poor man excuses himself to the restroom, and how he fails at trying to conceal his panic around you. It’s actually kind of adorable, in a way.

Meanwhile, Jin splashes water onto his face, trying to make sense of the situation. 2019. He said 2019. There’s no way that could be true unless--last night was not a dream. Yoongi actually did magic and cast a spell on him that made him come to the future. Jin was still unsure but the room he is standing in is proof enough, that he traveled in time. He now has to break it to you, tell you the reason he is actually here. You might run away like the others, but it’s his job to be honest with his clients. It may be one of the hardest things about being a matchmaker. His job is very much like a doctor’s, as he can’t promise good results 100% of the time, but he can make assumptions on the “diagnosis” and process reasons for failure.

“You aren’t from around here, are you?” Your words astonish Jin, as he walks back into the room and closes the door behind him.

“What do you know?” You fold your arms and lean back into the wall, your feet a couple inches off the ground.

“I know you aren’t a doctor, and you used the term “matchmaker” which means broker in this day and age, but back in the 70’s it was basically a glorified therapist.” You smirk as Jin’s mouth opens wide and he gawks at you, eyes twitching.

“H-h-how…?” The only thing he could think of was: witchcraft. Except you whip out your phone and prove him wrong.

“I’m not stupid, you know. We have something called the internet, which allows us to search anything up.” Jin grabs your cell phone and presses the buttons, surprised that your screen was responding to his touch, and that he could do so much with just hovering his fingers above the keys.

“A typewriter.” He gasps.

“A digital typewriter.” You gently take the phone out of his hands, laughing at his adorable demeanor as he recites the word “digital” like an incantation.

“Since you know what’s going on, I need to ask: when can I go back?” You look at him with confusion.

“What do you mean? I just figured you were cosplaying.” Your words astonish him, since he had never heard of the term.

“No! I am from 1972, and I work here, the King of Love? Ever heard of him? It’s me. I’m Kim Seokjin.” He tries to explain it but you simply wave him off.

“I don’t believe you’re from the 70’s.” You simply state, shutting him down completely.

“What can I do to make you believe me?” He asks.

“Vocab.” You snicker, knowing the man is sure to fail now.

“I have no idea what you’re trying to say. If anything, it looks like I’m the one who is in need of assistance.” His quality of speaking is very different from any other man’s voice you’ve heard, and it makes him sound sincere and more trustworthy.

“Look, bro, I needed a therapy sesh. Not some weird time travel shit. Now can we please--”

“That is not very appropriate, correct yourself.” His sudden command silences you, as you stare him down, a blush settling on your cheeks.

“Y-yes sir. I apologize for my use of profane language.” You feel strangely aroused, as Seokjin circles around you, making you feel slightly inferior to him.

“Good boy.” He smirks as your gaze falls down to his shoes, and you admire how neat it looks. Wow, it almost looks like an original pair. But you can’t get too distracted. “Maybe if you’re good for me, I’ll give you a reward?” You nod slightly as he scans your body, mentally undressing you with his eyes. He steps forward, and before you know it, his lips are on yours, pink, plush, velvety lips pressing against your skin. You’re burning up, and he’s doing this to you.

“Seokjin, please.” You whine as his fingers make their way down your jeans, unbuttoning them and sliding them down your bulge through your boxers.

“Please what?” He teases, repeating the gesture a couple times until you’re grinding against his hand, waiting for something to happen as you rutted against him lewdly.

“Please sir. Please make me cum with your fingers.” You mewl as he kisses you roughly, and his hands squeeze your ass lightly. “F-fuck.” You gasp as he spanks you with aggression.

“Take it off your clothes. I want your entire outfit on the ground. Right now.” You find yourself mesmerized by his authority, as you quickly obey his command, and you strip for him as he scans you. He was truly the most beautiful man alive, at least in this time period. You wonder if there are other attractive men in his time period. But then again, the really attractive ones usually don’t come around very often. He may be one of the exceptions.

“Sir...your fingers!” You look up to see that his eyes are filled with lust, all the compassion and softness gone. All that’s left is a lustful version of him, with hunger. Hunger for sex.

“On the bed, on all fours, right now.” Your eyes widen as your body moves on its own and you lie sprawled out for Seokjin, as your therapist stretches out your asshole with his long fingers. You shudder from his warm touch, unusually comfortable as he takes care of you.

“You’re such a good little boy, with an ass like this, you’re surely bound for great things.” What’s that supposed to mean?

“Um, thanks…?” Your entire body clenches as Seokjin adds a finger, and you let out a painful whimper as Seokjin proceeds to thrust his fingers in at an irregular pace.

“No problem.” He licks the rim, puckered and red for him, and he tests it once again, pumping his fingers in once more.

“Ah, fuck!” You cry out in pain.

“Shhh, it’ll be over soon,” He reassures you, kissing your ass before turning you over for a long kiss. “Are you ready?” He hovers over you, and you gulp as his dick aligns with your hole. You press another kiss to his lips before nodding, and allowing Jin to slide into you by lifting your legs up high and making your hole visible to him.

“Nice and tight. You’re so warm, wow Y/N, I don’t think I can go back. After feeling this ass, there’s no one I’d rather be with.” You were confused at this point, as well as aroused, very aroused. You thought this was a one-time thing, but Jin sounds like he wants more. You don’t care, though, it was probably in the heat of the moment.

“AHHHHH!!!” You let out the most sinful moans as he thrusts into you, his skin slapping against yours, making you scream from pain and pleasure. Jin moans predominantly from the tightness of your ass, and how despite prepping you, your body was still reacting to him in ways that were unexpected. You love this, it’s too good.

“I’m gonna cum, and fill up your ass.” Jin says, the filthy language making your dick erect once more. You never were soft with him.

“Do it, cum in my ass and make me your bitch, sir.” You smirk, challenging Jin as he flips you over, and changes positions. You close your eyes as he begins pounding into you, your ass in pain but it’s so worth it when he cums.

“Y/N…” He groans, pulling out and releasing the rest of his load onto your back. Shortly after, you have your own climax, cumming uncontrollably after seeing Jin reach his high. He kisses you passionately, wiping a tear from your eye. One more time, he slips into you as you climb on top of him. He watches you with a smile as you bounce on his cock, his balls slapping your ass you went up and down. Your ass is basically numb at this point, from being spanked so much. And your dick is pointing straight up, as Jin rubs it between his hands, up and down like how you were moving. You start moving quickly, now the two of you moaning each other’s names like madmen. You slow down when he cums again, making sure the cum filled you up for good this time. This time he continues moving, making you scream out in pleasure, loud enough for all the people in the building to hear. No other man has ever been able to make you orgasm like he could, you know in your heart that Seokjin must be the one.

“Did that hurt?” He asks, all of the lust disappearing from his voice and being replaced with compassion.

“Just a little at first, but it was fun.” You moan as he kisses your back, his plump pink lips leaving a thin layer of saliva as he does.

“You’re very tight, you know? I could warm my dick in there for hours and it still wouldn’t be enough.” You blush at his romantic words. No man has ever been so soft with you, sure you liked it rough since you were a guy, but you also had a strong attraction to the more feminine side of men. That’s how you found out you were gay. You dated girls that looked more like men, and then eventually had your first experience with a guy. Sure, you weren’t focused on finding a relationship at the moment, but tender-hearted Seokjin is the perfect man in your eyes.

“Mmmm, I have to go back now. I see the light.” Jin moves away from you unexpectedly, making your skin go cold as you wrap your arms around yourself.

“N-now?”

“Yes, but just know that I think you’re pretty cool. Any guy would be lucky to have you. Take care of yourself, Y/N.”

“Okay Jin. When will you be back?” You ask, hoping for the perfect answer.

“Never.”

***

It had been about two weeks since Seokjin left the future, and work was as dull as ever. After his experience with you, he couldn’t stop thinking about the future. How you could’ve possibly been pregnant after he released his seed in you twice (Yes Male pregnancy is a huge problem in this world) Yoongi and Namjoon hated seeing him like this, Taehyung even tried cheering him up with pink cupcakes but the only thing he could think of was his princess.

“He’s miserable.” Namjoon sighs.

“I wish we could help him.” Taehyung frowns.

“Maybe we can…” Yoongi wiggles his fingers and lets out a giggle.

Ten minutes later, Seokjin hears a knock on the door.

“Come in.” Even the enthusiasm is gone from his voice.

“Did anyone call for a therapist?” The shock on Jin’s face when he sees you is laughable.

“Y/N!” He runs to you, pressing endless kisses to your face. “I missed you so much, my prince.”

“I missed you too, Jinnie.” Your nickname for him makes him smile.

“It’s been too long.” He slowly moves down, kissing every inch of your body. He looks up at you for permission before removing your pants. He looks at your lace panties and pulls at the band.

“Dirty boy.” He strips off your underwear and leaves you to stare at your own rising erection, making your cheeks flush and your pores open up to sweat.

“Ahhhh, Seokjin.” You close your eyes as the slurping noise resounds, bouncing off the walls and letting everyone in the building know how well Seokjin fucks you. He continues rubbing your cock between his hands as he takes you into his mouth.

“Cum in my throat, baby.” He demands. Your body shudders and you let out another moan as you have an orgasm. Jin licks you clean and then you lean in to kiss him.

“This time, I’ll be the one who stays.” You say, yanking his tie off.

#jin smut #jin x reader #male reader #bts #btssmut #Smut #jin

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elejahfanfic · 4 years ago

Text

Hello Love/2

Fanfiction

Part 2

AU story with tvd characters

Miguel Galindo x Elena Gilbert💖

Ft. Klaroline, Kennett

It's a love story -no vampires. Human.

Featuring a song by David Bisbal_Me enamore de ti

Also, Yemaya is played by Zoe Saldana.

♡□

So much is going on in this ch, there is so many characters - I hope it still has a coherent flow - 😅

Thanks for reading. 😀😘

Tag_@miguelsbrat

♤♡◇♧

Niklaus, or better known as Klaus to his family and friends, just taken a cab to take him to the Mikaelson residence.

He still wasn't sure if he made the right decision to return home after so many years abroad, where he had built a very good reputation and established himself as a prominent young architect making his firm The Wolf Group, as they called themselves, one of the very best. He left it to be run by his partner, Marcel Gerard.

It was one morning after he spoke to Miguel that he made the abrupt decision to take a sabatical year and spend time with the family. Actually, to be precise, with his siblings, as his relationship with his parents was not a good one.

***

Meanwhile

In Rebekah's office, she was looking at the photographs that were to go in the next issue.

"Get me Damon" she said to her assistant Vicki.

"Anything else?" Vicki asked.

"No. I'll be working till late, so you can go. Thanks" Rebekah said.

The eldest of them was Finn, who tragically died in a car crash, at the age 20. Niklaus was their second child. He was three years old when they adopted Miguel.

Rebekah chose to work hard to prove to her father that she can get the fashion magazine up and running and make a huge success of it when she took over. So, at work she was known as the shrew, some of her co-workers would refer to her as a blood-sucker at times. The Mikaelson family was regarded as the most ambitious when business was concerned. Their parents taught their children to be excellent, to strive to excel. To be the best. And they made them proud.

After, Kol, Rebekah and finally Henrik followed.

Miguel fell in love and chose to go to live in San Diego to work after he married. And as his wife died, instead of returning to New York, he chose to go to Mexico City. As for Klaus, after finishing his studies decided to travel the world, finally settling in Europe starting to work as an architect in a small firm.

The Mikaelsons were a big family.

But lately, work was all she had on her mind.

Damon got to her office in a little while, and as he entered the first thing she said was-

"We are professionals and personal stuff should never affect the work-still- I am going to say this, because Elena is my friend and I love her dearly - you're an asshole! If you weren't so damned good at what you do I would kick you to the curb."

"That's not bad. I kind of thought you would dagger me!" Damon said.

"Let's get to work. Look at those", she now showed what she didn't like about those photos and asked for a new photo session with the next month's cover person.

***

Elsewhere

Bonnie and Caroline met Elena for some good old retail therapy. The best remedy when trying to kinda mend a broken heart. A change in style, hair was Caroline's suggestion. Also, they all had already received an electronic invitation to the Mikaelson cocktail night. And they need great dresses for the occasion.

Elena kept quiet about her unusual meeting in the cafe.

In the Upper East Side, Miguel met his son at his new school. Cris as he and all his family and friends called him didn't want to go to a private school, and so Miguel enrolled him in the public school recommended by Rebekah.

Cristobal, looked a lot like his mother, very savvy, goodhearted teenager, who knew exactly what he wanted in his life. He was very close his father. The death of Emily, cut them both and glued them even more together. Sometimes Cristobal took more care of his father, than the other way around. Mostly because Miguel was very dedicated to his work.

There were certain things he still needed to do regarding the transfer, and he now dealt with all that.

"There something different about you dad" he said to him when they got out of the school.

"In what way?" Miguel looked surprised at his son.

"I don't know. But- different! You have a happy face."

"I have a happy face?"

"Yes. Usually it's - just serious." Cristobal said as he opened the car door.

Miguel looked at the watch and he had promised their housekeeper Senora Vega that they would be on time for the evening dinner. "Come on, we are late."

And there was a certain truth, he felt different. The woman Elena that he had met in the cafe was not getting out of his head. He had not felt a tingle in his heart for a woman for a very long time.

***

Greenich Village

Elena returned home later that evening and looked at the dress she chose for the cocktail party. Then at her new hairstyle, running her hands through them, inhaling deeply.

"Stop it!" she said to herself in the mirror, "stop thinking about him. Don't need anyone right now. Good-he looked so good in the three-piece suit- too good. "I am going crazy- what's wrong with me?!"

This man was not even her type. She prefered guys in jeans, with a badboy vibe about them. 'Mike' was completely the opposite. What was happening to her. Rebound thoughts. Totally crazy. Sliding the dress safely into the small closet, she went to the living room and put one of her mix playlists on.

Taking her laptop, she made hetself comfortable on the sofa. It was time to do some work. Lena's Cookie website needed updating. Browsing through the photos of her recent cookie creations made her stumble on a few she had done for her friend Yemaya's birthday. Though she was from Brasil, she was very much into mexican art and so she had requested mexican sugar cookies for her birthday fiesta.

Thinking of 'Mike', she looked up a recipe from her notes.

Me enamoré de ti, jamás lo imaginaba

Que algun día yo, de amor iba a vivir

***

A couple of blocks away

"Move in with me" he blurted out inbetween kisses and half way to bed disregarding supper.

"Enough of work." Bonnie said closing Kol's laptop nestling comfortably on his lap, pulling him into a kiss.

Kol finished writing the draft of his last research paper. Bonnie sneaked up on at him with a trey of food and wine.

"Who is joking? Move in with me. I'm serious. I want you here - all the time. It's crazy paying for two apartments, sleeping ovet here- there."

"Ok," Bonnie said,"yeah, let's be practical"

"This is not about being practical," Kol drew his fingers up her cheeks, looking at her dreamily, "I really want you here with me all the time."

"When you look at me that way, I could never say no."

"You drive me crazy" Kol smiled, "At times I can't believe you are real - and you are with me"

"Shut up and kiss me" Bonnie pressed her forfinger on his lips.

She was a person so very open hearted, giving and so loving. He met her accidently, so he thought, as he waited for Rebekah to meet him for lunch at the bar. He didn't know that the Rebekah and the others set Bonnie and he up on a blind date. He complained to Rebekah that he had no luck in the love department and that he had enough of dates that led to nowhere.

He kissed her, and he took that as a 'yes'.

***

Stefan met his fellow journalist Yemaya for a last minute check before he gave in his article for print.

"Stop joking"

"Want to grab a drink?" he asked casually.

"Just one!" she stressed out, "Last night I had one too many"

"Wow- in the middle of the week ?!"he teased her as he knew her rule not to drink during the week.

"We took Elena out to kick her shoes off. She was really down."

"I heard," Stefan said, "I cannot make excuses for my brother, he is not bad-but he makes hell of mistakes."

"All the time!" Yemaya added.

"Yeah, but I am not really into the Damon- Elena talk. Actually, I need a date for a cocktail party?!"

"You got invited too?!" Yemaya was surprised.

"Maybe it was some mistake, but it came from Mikael's official e-mail!" Stefan said.

"Yes. I would like to be your date!" Yemaya accepted happily.

"Good!"- Stefan smiled, and now waited for her to finish off what she was doing.

***

Days went by in a flash, and everyone had mostly work on their mind. Well, not everyone. Elena had something else on her mind, or rather someone else.

The Mikaelson cocktail party started to be the thing everyone started to talk about.

Esther and Rebekah were deeply immersed in the event. Everything had to be perfect.

Esther had invited all her family for a family brunch the day before.

Kol, Miguel and Cristobal arrived an hour before the meal. Cristobal immediately went with Henrik, who was two years older than him and that was a bit strange as he was in actual fact his uncle.

"What is not weird with this family" Cristobal said looking at Henrik wide-eyed.

"I kind of have to get to know Klaus and Miguel- they look too serious" Henrik said.

"Dad can be fun-he just doesn't like to show it much!" Cristobal explained. "Show me the last vynils you’ve bought."

"Come on" Henrik said gesturing to follow him to his room.

Rebekah walked in the living room all chirpy, "Gossiped much?!"

"No. Why would you think so?" Klaus said. "Then you have changed- you always had something smart to say about me"

"I did hear already comments about what a dragon you are at work, " Klaus teased, "it's only fashion, but I guess it has to be run with military precision. Father must be very proud!"

"There-you see" Rebekah looked at Miguel, who wanted to stay out of it.

"I hear you have new friends," Klaus said,"kicked the old snobby ones to the curb, I hear"

"I am sick of her snoby friends- yes-I have managed to make proper friends, and if you behave, maybe I will introduce them to you!" Rebekah shot back at her brother tapping him on the shoulder.

Esther walked into the Salon and there was gladness in her heart. All her children were there, and that was a rare occasion in the last years.

Her husband now joined them and they sat down for a very different brunch they all were used to. It was warm, chatty and quite lively.

Esther was counting her blessings, though her heart was not entirely at ease.

***

The next day, the pre-cocktail buzz was already in full flow with both the hosts as well as their invites.

Caroline talked to Elena over the phone about the cocktail party and Klaus.

"He looks really good," Caroline said, "you should check his site- he has done some amazing stuff."

"Caroline, you are telling me that I get into things head over heals like instantly. Rebekah is great, but he is a Mikaelson. Do you really want to get involved with one of them?"

"Elena, I know what you're thinking. Too close to home. Could mess up a great friendship if things go bad"

"Not thinking anything. Ok. I got to go. See you later"

"I will pick you up," Caroline said, "oh, I went back and changed the dress. I am wearing the blue dress - right- Jess is hear to do my hair. I will see you soon."

"Ok." Elena put the phone down.

Elena went to do her hair and make up herself. She was good in anything creative. She decided to wave it a bit and pin one side. She was going for a more natural look, and yet looking glam.

Simplicity has always been her motto. And yet, everything she did never looked simple. From her range of cookies to her relationships.

The door bell went and Elena was surprised to see Yemaya at the door. She had already been ready and dressed.

"Hey- Sorry. I just had to come" the woman stormed in.

Elena could see that her friend was all flustered. Something major must have happened for her to be coming and not calling.

Elena now waited to hear her spill the beans.

"Ok -I am going to say it- huh- I slept with Stefan. We went for a drink and it was just one drink -and we talked and he drove me home and then we kissed and then we kissed some more and- you know the rest."

Elena didn't understand what was so bad about it. He and Yemaya were work collegues. And that is exactly now what was Yemaya's concern.

"I said I would never get involved with someone I work with."

"Shall I guess what you told him in the morning?! Exactly that?! Right?"

Yemaya nodded.

***

In the Mikaelson Mansion, Esther Mikaelson was going through the list with her personal party organizer for the afternoon cocktail party the family was hosting for an exlusive charity event for the hospital Miguel and Kol worked for. Just one look from her said volumes when she was displeased with something. When her favourite sister died in the car crash, everyone thought that she would retreat and never come back, as she did go away for a year to grieve and be by herself. The grief changed something in her, she became a recluse, but adopting Miguel, brought her back to life. As he now walked out into the garden, greeting her with a small kiss on the cheek.

"How are you, querida madre?"

"Very well - even better now that you and Cristobal are here." Esther replied.

"This looks beautiful. Thank you for doing this."

"Darling, it is nothing. It's my pleasure. Where is Cristobal?"

"With Henrik" Miguel said and now greeted Kol and Bonnie.

Kol then went on to introduce Bonnie to Klaus and Miguel. Rebekah quickly snatched Bonnie away from the men.

"So, I'm hearing wedding bells from the distance!" Klaus teased Kol.

"Unlike you, I actually want one woman for myself!" Kol threw back at him.

"You haven't changed at all!" Klaus said. "I will leave you two to discuss whatever medical thing you will discuss"

"Bonnie" Miguel started, " she seems to be lovely!"

"What about you? Are you never going to find someone again?” Kol asked his brother.

"I don't know," Miguel said, "maybe"

"What does that mean? Have you met somebody?" Kol continued with the quizzing. "Dr Ruben has set her eyes on you. She's been asking me if you were dating anyone?"

"Please don't play the matchmaker." Miguel warned.

"Don't worry -"

Cris and Henrik came up to them and Kol now turned to them, quizzing them about the band they were forming.

The guest started arriving and Cris now observed how Esther and Mikael, together with Rebekah glided among the guests and how masterfully they played the hosts.

Damon and Stefan arrived together. Krystal made a solo appearance.

Elena, Yemaya and Caroline entered like a grand trio.

Rebekah was there like a shot and greeted her friends.

"Who invited Krystal?" Caroline shot at Rebekah straight out seeing the woman mingling with some of the guests.

"Father's office - she is the best model and it's about business -if you thought that this was a family thing only, then you are mistaken -come on -let me introduce you to Miguel and Klaus."

Elena's heart dropped when she heard the name, but when she actually saw that it was the man she had met in the cafe, her heart started beating uncontrollably. She tried to keep her composure as Rebekah officially now introduced them.

"Hello" Miguel said, curling a smile at the brunette.

"Hello" Elena muttered and smiled back at him, “I thought your name is Mike?!”

"Uhm - it's Miguel - when we were kids Rebekah would call me Mikey - uhm - I don’t know why I introduced myself using my childhood nickname - just felt like - I suppose being back in New York”

"Oh, you've met?" Rebekah said slightly wide-eyed.

"Yes- a few days ago" Miguel said, his eyes still fixed on Elena.

Se pinta de colores toda mi alma

Con esa dulce luz de tu mirada

Y al verte sonreír, vuelvo a tener fe

Elena nodded, confirming it was so, looking at her friend and then at the suave looking cardiologist.

The waitress with champagne cocktails approached them and Miguel now took the glasses and offered one to her.

"Strawberry Bellini! I think you will like it." Miguel said to the brunette.

"Thank you!" Elena took the glass. She was at ease now. His charm just enveloped her and she didn't care anymore that she had seen Damon and Krystal at the party.

Not standing far from them, Caroline already chatted with Klaus as if they knew eachother forever. He offered her a Mimosa cocktail.

"You are looking in the direction of that brunette like she had done something to you so disgracefully" Klaus commented since Caroline looked at Krystal off and on.

_ to be continued

#miguel galindo #elena gilbert #fanfiction #klaroline #kennett #rebekah mikaelson #alternate pairing #alterntive universe #the originals imagine #the originals fanfiction #crossover au #crossover fanfiction

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iguessishouldbethankful · 5 years ago

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HI I HAVE TWO! What kind of dates do you think Falco and Lucy would go on? Mostly asking because you're turning me very quickly into a Falucy shipper.~

SHIP ASKS:

YOU SAID YOU HAD TWO! You liar jhsbfjhdslfsdh

It’s okay. Hmmmm...

You know, it’s an interesting to think about Falco asking someone on a date, especially someone like Lucy since she’s kinda the daughter of Peppy Hare. You know, the old man that seems harmless but is able to bench press Wolf and he has done so in front of everyone and Falco was like okay then.

But depending on how the relationship starts, and yes I have thought of other ways they could get together instead of the one from this ask, it will determine on who asks first.

I usually see Falco approaching Lucy after the events of Command, so a lot of the dates would usually start out as official “you need a date for this military event.” And Falco would get invited because he is a former Star Fox member and someone that’s almost a son to Peppy. So he would need a date. And of course sure he could ask Katt, but either she’s busy or she’s already an item with Kool. So that’s a no go. And Fox isn’t really giving Falco the chance to say no because he doesn’t want to be the only one in a stuffy room full of old men for the gods HELP ME FALCO-

Okay geez. Then Falco just calls up Lucy. Please tell me you don’t have a date yet.

...Are you serious?

Yes.

...You could have asked me without sounding desperate.

Listen-

So it becomes a thing where they would sort of pair up during official events because Lucy ends up not caring for her father’s position and Falco absolute dislikes formal occasions. So after a few drinks and hellos, they would both actually ditch the fancy parties and fuck around downtown. Poor Fox is sweating bullets next to Krystal. You can bet Amanda is chatting up a storm with the older ladies who are cooing at the first tadpole she had with Slippy, and Slippy is grinning all proud.

...Wait we’re here for Falco and Lucy. Lmao.

But yeah, since the wedding situation, Falco and Lucy find this comfortable and surprisingly beneficial relationship of ditching what doesn’t make them feel good and exploring things together. Lucy in expensive dresses and Falco in tuxedos, going into clubs to dance and drink, sometimes getting junk food, play arcade games where Lucy somehow always beats against Falco because he’s a scrub at these.

How are you bad at these?

Don’t rub it in!

No this is a legitimate question Falco, how are you terrible at these? Did you fail every simulation in the Academy?

NO-

Playing pool also, and Lucy taking arm wrestling challenges at bars for free drinks because she is very strong. Falco also makes sure no fucking creep approaches either of them while they are out since, well, they sometimes don’t exactly mix in because of how they are dressed. Not that Lucy would exactly need help but his mom taught him how to be a gentleman fuck you-

But of course, spending more time together will lead to more intimate thoughts. Neither of them thought they’d have that much in common, really. Lucy being an ice queen, the good girl or the stern teacher at the Fichinian Academy. Falco being the cool hot shot fly boy, solo spacer and rebellious. Instead Lucy was surprised to find someone that was a bit more sensible, that paid attention and didn’t mind being humble when the time asked for it. And Falco was surprised to see that Lucy did have a more adventurous side, wanted to spread her wing and explore the universe like he did.

Hey Luce?

Yes sir?

...First of all, no.

I’m sorry it’s a habit!

You don’t see me addressing you as ma’am.

Unless you’re in my class room.

Now that’s different. Look, let’s skip this. Do you wanna do something a bit more, y’know, not this?

...I’m not understanding....

Do you want to get off this rock and disappear for a while??

....

Listen, I get it if you say no. Just seemed like you needed a vacation or something fro-

Yes.

Huh?

YES! I said yes! When? Where? Now? I need to send out emails and find a substitute for my classes but I can to this now I-

Whoa whoa! Take it eas-

Where are we going??

I-... You know what, we’ll cross that bridge when we get there. Send those damn emails.

Yes sir!

DON’T-

#star fox #falco lombardi #lucy hare #my drabbles #meme stuff #headcanons #falucy #i have way more than this but it's getting late and I need to go to sleep ; v ;#long post #an-actual-overlord

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fanficsaremylifeline · 5 years ago

Link

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, Spider-Man - All Media Types, The Avengers (Marvel Movies) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Ben Parker & Peter Parker, Peter Parker & Dum-E, Peter Parker & Morgan Stark (Marvel Cinematic Universe), Peter Parker & Tony Stark Characters: Peter Parker, Ben Parker, Dummy (Iron Man movies), Morgan Stark (Marvel Cinematic Universe), Tony Stark Additional Tags: he likes to talk, who cares if nobody answers, Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV) References, whump warning: fire, ironfam, Irondad, IronDaughter, spiderson Series: Part 12 of Ironfam Summary:

Not everybody Peter enjoys talking to always answers. Doesn't mean that Peter can't talk to them though.

“Hi, Uncle Ben”, Peter smiled, somewhat awkwardly. “Happy birthday!” He toyed around with the card he held in his hand. “Unfortunately, they didn't have any 'For the awesome Uncle, who is practically your father' , so I went straight with 'For the world's best Dad'. I mean it's true on any level except genetically. Though I'm not sure how human my genes are any more, so I guess that's even true of my parents... Sorry, I'm digressing.”

Gently, he placed the card just by the bouquet of daisies, Uncle Ben's favourite flowers. They were somewhat wilted, but Aunt May was sure to come by later, and get him a fresh one for his birthday.

“Don't tell Aunt May that I skipped school, though”, he pleaded as he sat himself down, just by the head stone. “She'll ground me from Ned, or Spidermanning, or the Avengers and that's not cool... Oh yeah, that's right, I'm an official Avenger now!”, he beamed proudly, after having made sure that nobody was around to listen in on Peter talking to his Uncle's grave. “I know, it's so cool, right? And woah, you should have seen Aunt May, when she took on Tony Stark, and made very clear that every little thing that'll happen to me, she'll make sure he'll suffer too.” Peter couldn't help but giggle at Tony's grimace. A man who didn't seem to be afraid of anything was seriously scared of Aunt May. Not that Peter could blame him for that; he'd rather go up against the Vulture again, than Aunt May when she was angry with him.

“She's alright. I know I don't have to, because she's like the most badass woman out there, but I'm still looking out for her. And she is doing good.”

There was just this big, burning thing, looming in Peter's mind. “So, this might be a little awkward, but she's seeing someone again. He works for Tony, he's a really good guy, actually. And yeah, it's plenty weird. But Aunt May says, that he's not here to replace you, or anything like that, so I guess that's something...”

Fidgeting nervously with his fingers, Peter looked down on his hands. “I'm not gonna do that, I promise”, he vowed, “I'll never forget you, and I'll always love you and as good of a guy Happy is, you'll always be my Uncle, and you'll always have that place in my heart that nobody ever can have.”

At this point, Peter wasn't sure if he assured Uncle Ben or himself. Him it definitely helped; things were sort of out in the open. It'd be so much easier though, to hear some sort of answer, get some kind of reaction. But that wasn't gonna happen, was it?

“What? No!”, Peter groaned and dropped to the ground. “Why, WHY?”

At his outburst, Dum-E wheeled over, looking at Peter with a somewhat tilted head. Not that he really had one, but he definitely seemed to be curious what had Peter so frustrated.

“It's not working Dum-E. Nothing is! So, you see, that thing here is supposed to light up.” He pointed at the robot he built for the science fair.

It was slightly embarrassing, Peter had worked on far more advanced projects in here, mostly with Mr Stark, but also when by himself. “And I can't just ask Mr Stark, it's way to easy.”

Dum-E followed him around the table, curiously inspecting everything Peter explained to him. “So you see, with these cables connected, it should react to my commands! Ugh.” He rolled his eyes at his own idiocy and turned to Dum-E looking at him somewhat dubiously. Great, even the robot thought Peter was an idiot.

“Don't look at me like that”, Peter made clear, pointing at him.

The way Dum-E looked up at him, with his head somewhat tilted to one side, it reminded Peter of a puppy dog, realizing that something was wrong, but not really understanding what it was.

“I'm sorry”, Peter sighed and patted the little head, “I'm just stressed and annoyed and...” He just let out a deep sigh. But, all moping wouldn't help him, so he went back to disassembling the circuitry.

“I know you're not gonna answer”, Peter eventually remarked, “but I think I'm gonna keep on talking to you.”

The beep that came from Dum-E sounded to Peter like the robot consenting to be talked to.

“Great. Alright, so the idea is that the robot can walk and follow a few simple commands. It's not like I'm creating an AI here, so it shouldn't be too complicated. I know, I know”, he hurried to say, when he felt Dum-E looking at him all funnily. “I shouldn't give too much thought to the aesthetics, but it's a damn science fair, so I'll just have to bother with that, even if the rest suffers for it.”

“Beep.”

“Come on”, Peter rolled his eyes, “that was really uncalled for.”

“Beep, beep.”

“Wow, Dum-E, there is no need for name-calling”, Peter shot back, staring the robot down, who eventually dropped his head.

“Beep.”

“Yes, of course you're forgiven.”

“Beep. Beep, beep.”

“Omigod, yes, that's it!”, Peter cried out, leaned over to press a kiss on Dum-E's head, before turning back to his own robot, where – whether by himself or with help from Dum-E – Peter had finally found the mistake.. “Thanks so much, Dum-E, you're a genius!”

“You full?”, Peter asked, looking down on the six months old girl, who dejectedly threw the biscuit through the room. “I guess that's a yes”, Peter snorted and repositioned her on his lap.

“So, Morgan, as your honorary older brother, it's my duty to teach you the important things in life”, he explained. “And one of these things I need to introduce you to is Brooklyn Nine Nine.”

Peter didn't even have to ask FRI to play it, Netflix opened automatically on the big TV screen. He was on his umpteenth rewatch, currently somewhere in season 1 again.

“So, that's Jake”, he explained.

“Shdkpf.”

“Yeah, he's pretty smart”, Peter agreed with her. “That's Amy.”

“Giggidgsh.”

“Exactly!”, he grinned, “he's totally into her. But he plays over it, because, well, he's a little awkward.”

“Pfffrm.”

“I'm not awkward!”

“Gskgsk.”

“Oh, that is so unfair of you to bring up”, Peter complained. “And it's totally not the same! I kept on lying to MJ to keep her safe!”

“Mmmhpff.”

“I can't believe that you would say that to me, when we both know what your Dad did for you Mum.” He looked down on Morgan who beamed up with wide eyes. “He got her an oversized stuffed bunny. I got MJ a necklace.”

“Brrrrrrrrm.”

“Thank you, Morgan. But now let's get back here. See, that's Teddy.”

“Pshhhmmm.”

“Mo! I know he's not the greatest, but we don't say words like this! Anyways, he's also into Amy. And she's kinda into him. And Jake doesn't find that so great.”

“Gshkshsga.”

“No, it's nothing like me, MJ and Brad. I don't even know where you'd get that idea. Besides, Brad doesn't even matter any more. And Teddy won't matter for too long, either.”

“Gashmmmm”

“Sorry, spoiler alert”, Peter apologized and tapped his finger on her hand, prompting her to grab it, squeeze and pull on it. “Dude, we can be happy I got superpowers, otherwise that'd probably hurt. Like a lot. You're really fierce, hey?”

“Hmmmmpf.”

“Yeah”, he beamed, “exactly like your Mummy.”

The first thing Peter realized, was something or someone holding onto his hand, and a soft voice talking to him.

“How often have I told you to call me when things go pear-shaped? I'm a genius and I can't even count how high.”

That sounded a lot like Mr Stark. Why was he holding Peter's hand, and why were his eyes so heavy?

“You really are an absolute pain in my ass, Parker”, Mr Stark continued. “I mean, I'm absolutely impressed by how smart you are, by your innate desire to help people, but do you have to be so damn self-sacrificial? Remember, I got a heart condition and that shit just ain't good for me!”

A calloused thumb gently stroked the back of his hand. “Fuck”, he mumbled, “I guess I should probably tell you how awesomely you did, how you saved all the people from that burning building, but did you have to breathe in that much smoke? You're lucky you got your spider-healing, things could have looked very differently.”

Slowly, things came back to him. KAREN directed him to some office building, where a fire had broke out, trapping a bunch of people on the top floors. Peter didn't even think twice before climbing up the wall to get everybody out.

“And by the way, I'm not the only one who thinks that”, Tony made clear. “Your lovely girlfriend said something along the lines of her going to kill you if you end up dead. And Aunt Hottie... Damnit, I really should stop calling her that, especially in front of you, it's just all shades of wrong... Well, she definitely agrees with Michelle, as does Morgan. In summary, you've got three of the fiercest women on this planet on your ass.”

“That being said, I am still so proud of you. And I really am one lucky son of a bitch to have such an exasperating, snarky, pain-in-the-ass Spiderling in my life. So please, to all that's holy and good in this world, please, just please...” A deep sigh followed, before Mr Stark continued to speak: “Kid, I love you. Which means I worry so damn much. And as good as I look with grey hair, there's no need for you to give me any more of those, you got that?”

“Yeah”, Peter mumbled and squeezed the hand that was holding onto his.

“Wha...” Mr Stark jumped, clearly having thought Peter was asleep. “And how long have you been awake, mister?”

“Long enough”, he sighed, feeling himself already drifting off again. “I love you, too, Mr Stark.”

#avengers #ironfam #peter parker #uncle ben #dum-e #morgan stark #tony stark

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nightmare-grass · 5 years ago

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So I’m officially Spidersona trash

Here I have compiled the main characters, their abilities and personalities, and their relationships within the story I am currently working on and have been working on ever since the Spidersona movement of 2018.

1. My personal OC

- Name: Nora Weaver

- Age: 19

- Alias: Jumper

- Based on the Bold Jumping Spider

- Quirky, inventive, sneaky, caring, impatient, smart, and kinda egotistical

- Saw the Prowler fighting Prism on tv one time and thought, ‘hey, those rocket-boot things are pretty cool’

- Later on she made her own rocket boots for a college science fair (it’s a high school science fair, tbh, but colleges scout for talented students to give scholarships to), she promotes them as footwear for rescue efforts and stuff like that

- At this science fair another kid was doing experiments on spiders and one escaped and bit Nora, giving her spider powers

- Since Nora’s thing is mechanics, she got her more chemistry-inclined older sister to help make her web fluid

- Sister’s name is Amelia

- She eventually designed her own suit and was from then on known as Jumper

- Only her sister knows her true identity

- She has arachnophobia (coincidentally)

- She’s adopted and it turns out her biological father is Dr. Octopus

- Her birth mother is a woman named Mary Alice Anders (Otto and Mary split up in Otto’s tragic villain backstory)

- She gets scrap and parts from an auto body shop and the son of the guy who owns the shop is really cute and Nora has a crush on him. His name is Dominic Mazzetti.

- One humid summer day Nora drops down in an alley in her spider suit and peels the spandex off to sit at her waist, having been wearing a tank top underneath, in order to cool off. She realizes too late that she’s right next to the auto body shop when Dominic comes around the corner, looking to take a shortcut, and sees her. She webs him up, jumps onto the rooftop with him, and starts freaking out, but she makes him promise not to tell anyone her secret. From then on they work together more closely.

- Gwen Stacy is kind of the designated bully, seeing her as a rival for good grades, so she mockingly call her “Snora” since Nora falls asleep in class quite a bit due to her hero work

- Eventually Gwen and Nora become friends

- Nemesis: Doctor Octopus

- Recurring Villain: Screwball

“Alright, lets start at the beginning one last time. My name is Nora Weaver. I built some rocket boots, was bitten by a radioactive spider, and for the last year and a half I’ve been one of a few spider-themed heroes in my city. I call myself Jumper. I’m pretty sure you can figure out the rest. I saved some people, joined a spider hero team, graduated, started college, nearly dropped out, and now I’m in the process of saving the city again. By the way, I was in the middle of that. Catch ya later!”

2. Peter Parker Gender-bend

- Name: Penelope Parker

- Age: 18

- Alias: Ladybird

- Based on the Ladybug Mimic Spider

- She was the one with the spider science project

- when one of her spiders bit her, it momentarily distracted her and she let two more escape, one biting Nora, another biting Skylar

- Wears glasses

- When they get to community college Penelope meets Harry Osborn and after a while of being friends they start dating. This will not end well.

- Nemesis: Green Goblin

- Recurring Villain: Black Cat

“Alrighty then! I guess we can start at the beginning one more time. My name is Penelope Parker, and for the past year and a half I’ve been the hero known as Ladybird. I was experimenting with some spiders and radioactive elements when three of them got out and bit me and two of my now best friends, and so we decided to form a superhero team. I figure you know the rest; we saved the city, started college, I got an internship that ended up being a trap, my aunt May died, and now we’re trying to save the city again. Yeah, it hasn’t been great.”

“AGH, Harry is such a dreamboat!” Penelope twirled around gaily and flopped onto her bed with a sigh. “I don’t deserve him,” she murmured with a smile.

Nora rolled her eyes. “Of course you deserve him, Pen! In my eyes, you deserve the world,” Nora said matter-of-factly.

3. OC

- Name: Skylar Tran

- Age: 19

- Alias: Spider-Shine

- Based on the Mirror Spider

- Non-binary, they/them pronouns

- Black hair dyed blue

- Filipino

- Reflective/shiny skin (yes, like the Twilight vamps, get over it)

- Cocky, flamboyant, funny, millennial humor, depressed but doesn’t wanna show it, being a superhero gives them something to live for

- Has scars from depression on their arms

- Very much an anime fan

- Starts out as a “Hero for Hire” where they got paid for rescuing people but quit that as soon as they found out about Tombstone and how he scares the people of NYC into paying him so he doesn’t let worse things happen to them

- Nemesis: Tombstone

- Recurring Villain: The Tinkerer

4. Symbiotesona

- Name: Amber Herald

- Age: 31

- Alias: Prism

- Symbiote

- Bonded with Prism when she was 23 and working for the Life Foundation

- They’re lesbians, Harold.

- Prism’s thing is light refraction, so she can turn invisible

- She’s an established hero when the three newbies get bit

- Their origin story is kinda like the Venom movie except they don’t take down a big bad corporation or stop an alien invasion

- Prism is a forced spawn of Venom

- Life Foundation captured Venom to make more Symbiotes but Prism was one of the few Symbiotes that escaped with a host

- Dreamcasting Idina Menzel as Amber

- Nemesis: Any evil Symbiotes that happen to pop up.

- Recurring Villains: Prowler and Kraven the Hunter

Side Characters

1. Harry Osborn

- Son of Norman Osborn

- Has a degenerative disease that Norman tries to fix with experimental science

- Goes mad, becomes Green Goblin

- Before he’s the Goblin, he and Penelope start dating

2. Gwen Stacy

- daughter of Police Captain, George Stacy

- Gifted in biochemistry

- Wants to become a forensic scientist for the NYPD, following in the footsteps of her father but in her own way

- On weekends she is the drummer for MJ’s band

- Sees Nora and Penelope as her academic rivals and sometimes bullies them

- Loves music

- Is a lesbian and has a crush on MJ but she’s still in the closet

- If I ever want to make her into Spider-Gwen, I could kill off Amber and have Prism bond with Gwen

3. Mary Jane “MJ” Watson

- Intern/reporter for the Daily Bugle

- Sometimes self-absorbed, mostly self-assured and witty

- Has a band called The Mary Janes where she’s the lead singer and lead guitarist

- Keyboard player is Glory Grant

- Drummer is Gwen Stacy

- She’s bisexual and she has a crush on Gwen

- With her hot temper and Gwen’s bull headed stubbornness, they have quite a few disagreements

4. Felicia Hardy

- becomes Black Cat, an antihero

- Her dad used to develop tech for Oscorp when he was found “stealing” some of the tech he worked on and was laid off

- Her dad used the tech he’d developed to aid him in cat burglary because he couldn’t find a job and had to support he and his daughter but he was caught stealing from one of Kingpin’s businesses

- Felicia used her dad’s tech to steal enough money to pay for his bail but kept stealing afterward

- Takes up a Robin Hood-like role where she steals from rich assholes like Kingpin and Norman Osborn and gives back to the homeless of NYC

- She’s really quiet as a civilian, almost unnerving, but that’s because she spends all day coming up with cat-related quips and catchphrases to use when she goes out as Black Cat

5. Screwball

- I want to add more to her character, really dig deep and find the person behind the vlogger/criminal nut job

- Her crimes are just stunts and dangerous pranks on important figures

- She live-streams every crime

- Started off with a prank channel on YouTube but when she started drawing the attention of Jumper and the bunch for her dangerous stunts, her videos started to get more views, so she just scaled up her pranks to draw the attention of the heroes even more

- Expert Gymnast and Media Influencer

- Some of her fans are so rabid for her that they’ll commit murder at her slightest suggestion

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isolctions · 5 years ago

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y’all ain’t really ask but i’mma talk abt it anyway.

i’ve already started to tag things for them bc i had the idea formulated in my head since...the literal inception of the vaughn siblings, but being that bakari is the most reckless of them all, it kinda felt weird that one day i could potentially write his death (which, by the way, i will.) & feel like there’s no one set in stone in his life like with the rest of the siblings. so before any of bakari’s current ships, relationships, or any connections gained through writing him on my blogs, bakari has one other person as his confidant — nikita simms.

bakari met nikita the way he met a majority of the people in his life that he considers close friends, people outside of his family members that know him best, people that he treats as if they were his own blood: on the playground of a church down the block from the two bedroom project apartment that the vaughns were living in. they played together, sure, but he didn’t actually come to know nikita until the passing of cartier led the siblings to enter the public school system for the first time.

since bakari was six, he, nikita, and zay attended the same school, even if they didn’t have the same teachers as grades progressed. and while at first, bakari tried to pull the tough act by stealing nikita’s things on the playground, she essentially beat his whole ass during recess for trying her too many times and he respected her for it. zay included, they were a team, all throughout sixth grade — until, as they grew up and developed their own interests (zay with art, bakari with putting katya & damon’s drug dealings on a pedestal, nikita with writing clubs afterschool), they drifted apart. it didn’t officially start until the summer of seventh grade when she admitted, rather awkwardly after their first kiss, that she wouldn’t be going to school with him anymore.

from then on out, their relationship had been rather similar to the characters from the movie ‘the wood’, ronald & alicia. yeah they saw each other from time to time on the block...but not often. as for zay’s perspective, being that she’d been part of his first real friend group, felt so betrayed by her leaving suddenly and doing her own thing that he took to calling her ‘sugar hill harlem’ — when in reality, she’d still been living in harlem with her grandmother at the time, who sent her to a catholic school further uptown. but because bakari knows this, he defended her without looking ‘soft’. and yeah, they kissed that one time over the summer, but they don’t talk abt that! nor do they talk abt how irritated they get with the other while discussing their crushes or anything. just casual friend things.

their tenth grade year is when shit got tough for them. she hadn’t known, and had inadvertently found out from zay, that bakari chose to drop out of high school in favor of selling drugs. so at that point, their friendship had been low blows, arguments, and passive aggressiveness. they didn’t fully talk about this either, until one night at a house party where nikita got waaaaasted. and when she confronted him, she ripped into him. all his potential gone, all the hope to move in footsteps away from his father’s, and instead he went to sell drugs. she’s crying, he’s fuming, they’re upset — but he still got her home safe. cause, y’know...that’s his home or whatever.

and the next morning, they talk abt their lives now again. how this changes shit. bc no matter how mad she was at him for his decisions, she’s still in his life & still wanted be. that’s what friends are for, right? and through this vulnerable ass discussion they have, they happen to kiss...again...and again...and again...then they just ask: ‘what are we even doing?’

and so they have sex.

they both have done it before, so it was just whatever. life went back to normal. they still hung out and got dollar pizza every now and then. nikita still sat with zay, despite their differences, to help him study for shit he wasn’t planning on applying. and when she graduated high school, nikita got a full ride at spelman. bakari hadn’t seen nikita since 18, and that was just how it was.

fast forward to the tail end of 2017, october to be specific, when nikita finally graduated from spelman and took time off before starting her internship at a writing company in atlanta to come home to harlem — or, back to earth, as he’d call it. and they changed. he had a tattoo shop now, and the first thing that nikita does is get herself inked with her first tattoo at swavey’s. then, bakari invites her out to celebrate down at damon’s nightclub, 92nd’s. she’d only been in town for a few days, so why not? they dance, they smoke a few, they share a few drinks and memories and life stories since she left, and it felt just like they’d been on the block again, chasing after the ice cream truck and splitting their quarters for a sundae.

and then, when he drives her back to her hotel room in a damn porsche, they have sex. again. and they text in the days afterwards, and off to atlanta she goes.

2018, he gets the text from nikita that she’s pregnant. they’re both stubborn and hard headed, though, so he takes the first flight to atlanta despite her telling him not to, and they just...figure it out from there. and although he’s still working and moving weight and attending meetings for and with katya, and while he’s still the most reckless fucking sibling out of all of the vaughns, he tries his best! he keeps this mostly under wraps from the rest of his family though, bc he prides himself on being the only one aside from ni’kyah to not have kids yet. cause he’s just a lying ass bitch.

july 31st, bakari & nikita had themselves a little leo!! amari marquel vaughn came, with bakari in the room to witness the birth of his son and be with his best friend. he may be a piece of shit, but he still a good dad!

these days, their son is now one and a half, and they still maintain that same close ass friendship. nikita has considered moving back to new york just to make the distance between them bearable, because she really does hate him not being around his son although he surprises her with visits often to make that happen. he used to think that his death wouldn’t mean much of anything to the small circle of people he keeps close to him, but now there’s amari he has to think about. imagine finally growing up at a whole 23, almost 24 fucking years old.

and when does his family, namely his mother, find out about this? fucking thanksgiving dinner, when nikita surprises him with a visit for once with amari in tow.

and like i said...the relationships that are established for the vaughns in canon (aka my head) kinda come first to me. it’s what i immediately think of with certain things. so just know that i’m not invalidating any ships that he may have within indie, but nikita is a presence in his life that is seldom going away any time soon. so there’s that.

#family — the vaughns #npc — nikita simms #brotp — bakari x nikita #xoxo

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didon · 5 years ago

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My two cents on this whole Taylor Swift drama

I normally only reserve my rants for tv shows, but I’ve seen enough crap in the last day that I kinda want to add a little to it.

First of all, I’m not a swiftie or whatever her die hard fans call themselves. Do I like some of her music sure, but there are other songs that make me cringe the same way there are things that happened with her that made me dislike her and others where I’m now looking back at and thinking that it was just me wanting to fit in and that it was ‘’cool’’ to hate on her. Cause I think that there really is a movement where you have to hate on successful women because they are not perfect until the point where they are no longer human beings but actual mythological creatures that we must revere or die otherwise (Beyonce and the Bee Hive come to mind). Has Taylor always been right? Nope. It’s that simple, she has done some not so great things and instead of trying to understand them, I just went with the motion of hating her because I thought it made me special (it did not).

Secondly, to the people saying that he didn’t bully her, that it was his client, remind me his job again? Dudebro is a manager. His job is literally to MANAGE people, to make sure that the celebrities he has under his care not only receive the best but are also perceived as great. Seems like him allowing Bieber to post a dig at a woman for no reason and then not issue an apology right after was a bad managing decision because the only thing it did is make him and his clients seem like pissy little boys that can’t take people not agreeing with him. Him allowing Kanye (because tell me how he could not have vetoed that whole video that I’ll talk about later) to show someone that he knew Kanye had a troubled relationship with naked WITHOUT that person permission is a bad management decision. Especially since it could have led to more than one lawsuits toward his client. I feel like a manager normally tries to avoid his clients getting sued. So either he allowed her to be bullied by his clients and probably had his own hand in it or he’s shitty as his job and should not be allowed to manage anybody. Because it has to be one or the other, there is no third options where he didn’t advise his clients not to do bad things and had no knowledge of it. If anything, he could have at the very least if that was the case wrote his own appology for being in Bieber instagram. No instead he chose to stay silent, giving his approval toward it and to keep people that were attacking a female celebrity for pissy reasons as clients.

Thirdly, concerning the whole Bieber thing. Dude has to stop talking. He is not someone that can truly speak having grown up being influenced by Dudebro. Didn’t he sign Bieber when he was still a minor and everything? And yet he allowed him to make a fool of himself more than once, to be agressive toward more than one person knowing that it could cost sales. Dudebro was both a bad manager and a bad friend toward Bieber. Bieber who seems to act as if a lot of his fanbase isn’t young influencable girls that he is pushing toward not only bad decisions like bullying someone else because the friend of a friend doesn’t like them and also supporting people that are homophobic. Because let’s remember that for a long time (and I think still now but I’m not 100% sure), Bieber was friend with this pastor who was known for being homophobic. You can’t call someone coming at your friend a bully, but then have one of your close friend be someone telling others that something they have no choice in makes them bad, evil in some cases and that the one person that is supposed to love them (I’m talking about God here for the Catholics) hates them. How many queer people are we going to lose to suicide because they are constantly told by some biggots that God hate them, that they are going against everything that is good, that they shouldn’t be allowed near children, etc.? And no saying that just because you attend his congregation and hang out with him doesn’t mean you don’t agree with him. This isn’t the same as someone prefering strawberry milk over chocolate milk, this is someone spewing hate to who not only are you giving a platform by being near them (because yes it does), but are listening to. How many young teens are going to see that guy and go ‘’hey Bieber follow him so maybe he’s right’’? When you chose to be a celebrity, yes it means that you lose part of your privacy, but it also means that you should be obligated to lend your voice to those who aren’t listened to. Taylor Swift did that with her letter against homophobia, with her video and her support of queer artists. Bieber does that by giving a biggot relevance and then getting mad when his ‘’friends’’ are called out on their bad behaviours.

Fourtly, the whole Kardashian/Kanye thing. I can’t believe it’s 2019 and it has to be addressed but it is NEVER okay to showcase somebody else’s naked body even if it’s for ‘’Art’’ without their permission. His video was not only revenge porn, it’s an attack on her. Revenge porn is mostly defined as sharing private pictures of someone. This isn’t the case. She didn’t send his a naked wax art of her body. As far as I’m concerned, this is straight up violating her privacy and her body. And not only hers but the one of everybody else included in that video. Sure he probably has the signed statement from his wife saying it was okay, but does he has the one from every single other person? Also stating where their wax double would be placed? Because I’m pretty sure that Rihanna wouldn’t have said yes to her body being exploited by a man and placed next to someone who’s biggest relevance is the fact that he ABUSED her. It’d be the same as a celebrity asking fans to stop drawing porn of them and then getting backlash from their fans because they believe that they own that celebrity body. Your body is your own and no egomaniac should be allowed to have a naked wax statue made of it and put it in his video. Speaking of videos, Kim’s one is void. Not only is it clear that the video has been edited, but it was ILLEGAL!! A court would not take it as proof of anything just based on this alone. This is the same as a cop breaking and entering to get proof to arrest someone because a warrant takes too long and he’s sleeping with the other suspect. I don’t care if she actually agreed to one line and not the other or whatever. The whole video is void and should never be mentionned because it’s something illegal that again violated someone’s privacy which a celebrity should really know about. Especially Kim. The whole claim that Kanye made Taylor famous is ridiculous too. Bitch didn’t make her famous, he made an ass of himself. She became famous with her own hard work and good strategy (something her manager might have a hand into). What he did at that award show was just stealing a moment from a woman because he was prissy he didn’t get his way. There’s a reason why Beyonce gave the stage to Taylor and that everybody got mad at him. He took a young woman achievement and try to ruin it because it wasn’t what he wanted. That shows clear immaturity and if anything it made him more famous that it made her. She wasn’t known as Kanye’s victim, she was known as a singer while he was known as the guy that made an ass of himself and ruined a 20 years old big moment. I don’t care who deserved the award more or if he was right, nobody else does it and for a good reason. I may not have always have agreed with award winners, but you haven’t seen anybody stopping Matthew McConaughey speach saying sorry to interrupt but Chiwetel Ejiofor had one of the best performance ever. It’s almost like his manager should have stopped him from making a fool of himself.

Fiftly, just a little mention for Demi Lovato that came to Dudebro defence. Girl is coming out of a very emotional situation, is probably not 100% okay yet so don’t send her hate. Plus, she has known him about two months and he makes money off her so he has probably not been a dick to her. Her entire defence may even have his hand in it since people around her may be employed by his company. I almost killed myself over a year ago and I know that I’m still very emotional and that people can still have a big influence on me depending on how I’m feeling. I can’t imagine being around people that may not have your best interest 24h/7. On her claim that he is not homophobic because he signed her though, I will say that she can’t refute somebody’s experience with the man simply based on her own especially since she’s a famous artist that probably brings him a lot of money. Plus, while she’s a queer woman that consider herself fluid (and good for her tbh), it doesn’t mean that she has the same experience as a gay person. She has (mostly) dated men in the recent years and biphobic people will use it as an excuse to say that while she is ‘’fluid’’ she’s mostly straight (which is bull, but that might be how they see her in her mind). She can’t come at a gay man and say that because she’s also queer, the man cannot be a bigot toward anybody in the queer community. Heck, queer people in the queer community are bigots toward other members. How often do we hear transphobia or biphobia coming from queer people? The answer is too often. Especially black queer people who are often erased from their own history (*cough* stonewall and camp *cough*)! My own father was super friendly toward a trans tennant he had, calling her by her name and the right pronouns like it was nothing, only using her deadname on the official papers since it wasn’t officially changed, but to me he told me that if I came out as trans he would kick me out because I am his daughter not his son. If you asked that woman than yeah my dad is a great ally, but she wouldn’t know how he interacts with other queer people including his own daughter.

Finally, on the whole master thing. Shut up. She wrote the songs so I don’t care who owns the right right now or if they gave her a chance to ‘’buy’’ them back. This is her own work. When Devianart started selling artists art without their consent because they ‘’owned’’ it, how many people did I see on this website calling for a boycott? How many people were pissed and swore that it was horrible and that no artist should ever lose the right to their own art? Well, it’s exactly the same for her. Yes even for those songs of hers I hate. She put her time, her effort in them and so they should be hers. The idea that some white dudebro has right over them is ridiculous. The fact that he will own her feelings, a part of her soul should be upsetting especially since one of his artist already violated her body by showing it naked without her consent. I would be furious if I was raped and a friend of my rapist got the right to some of my writing. Heck, I would probably be a lot more agressive than she was in that post. The fact that she managed to stay polite and calm is a miracle if you ask me. Especially since he will be making money of a video that his friend and client didn’t even deem good enough to win an award!! Cause let’s remember that as cringy as it might be to look back at how we were all obsessed with some of her music video (god knows I was even though I would have never admitted it at the time), a man representing someone who put her down for one of them is going to make money off them.

This is in no way acceptable and I encourage people to raise their voices against this and to keep those boys (because they are not men let’s be honest) accountable for their actions. Cause when Kesha needed help getting away from her rapist, Taylor Swift gave it to her and no matter how famous you are, you deserve to have people stand up for you. I’m not saying send hate, but keep holding men accountable for their shitty behaviours and for the creepy thing they say about women. We are not their objects, they do not own us in any way and we need to unite to stop them disrespecting us!! No matter your feeling on Taylor Swift and her music or her previous actions, this is something hateful that’s happening to her and women need to stand up and support each other! We own it to each other!!

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elizabethrobertajones · 6 years ago

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14x07 watching notes

In Which It Is Now Completely Apparent Which Of Buck And Leming Are Writing A Scene At Any Given Time

A Tale Of Lizbob Being Tormented By Toddlers

Hello it is 3:32am and I am awake from a dream of what the episode might have been (plus side: overt Destiel motel room sharing, downside: Jack accidentally killed Dean) because my tantruming toddler neighbour who just moved into the haunted house next door was screaming, and threw something at our adjoining wall. At 3am. So I'm not exactly well-rested and I'm kinda pissed, which isn't the best combo for a Buckleming episode, but when you wake up with a scream and a thump, you aren't going back to sleep for a lil while :P

Kudos to the rest of the writing team, we're 7 episodes in and I've thoroughly forgotten Nick exists. I've just been assuming he was caught, featured on a true crime program, and is already gone and locked up for the new murder and likely solving of a cold case.

Ahahahaaaa the opening of the recap is "when it comes to killing you, I'll be the one to do it" so that's ominous. As you might tell, my psyche is utterly wrapped around this whole Shakespearean tragedy of Jack vs Dean, and perhaps they're not gonna murder each other today but the constant reminders they're living in a murder or get murdered delicate thematic plot balance is exactly the sort of thing that we need to have hanging over their dynamic, as well of course as being the start point of their relationship to show how far they've come and how much they've changed and now love each other and how just last episode Dean got in his "fine i have a son now" episode a season or two later than everyone else and just in time for it to be "so now you bonded with him of course he's caught Doom because you can't have nice things for literally a single episode and this is your fault for bonding with him, Dean"

This recap is designed to wound me, a Jack fan and lover of how TFW loves their son

Ew, it's Nick. The first time in my life I've been tempted to skip at least a lil of the recap.

Imagine how tight it would have been to just do a 10 second "here's Jack" recap and cut to the action

and the action includes an episode without Nick stealing time from the boy

You know i spend exactly 0 time speculating on how Eugenie might write her personal fave bits of the episodes but if you had to throw together "nick is now a serial killer ritually murdering priests on a satanic bender" then that would have been a pretty close thing to what I could have come up with as distilled Buckleming essence. (gross)

There's a vague continued overlap of the human!Cas arc with the parallel to the open of 9x03 and the general aesthetic of season 11's Lucifer's satanic rampage bender thrown together but you know what that's more meta than this arc deserves and my boy is sick

OH NO CAS IS THE ONE WATCHING OVER HIM ABORT ABORT

His grace looks pathetic. Maybe he's trying not to wake Jack up. Maybe he doesn't have a whole lot left.

That's not helping, Cas

ANXIOUS PARENTS OUTSIDE HIS ROOM

I bet Cas sent them away because they were hovering

Dean this is not what happens to kids, stop trying to kid yourself that this is like having a regular demonic toddler

Man am I glad I do not have kids right now both because I don't have to worry about them and also because they scream and throw stuff at the walls at 3am

Dean angry at Cas cuz he's worried about Jack oh no oh no oh no look at these stressed parents. Cas is forced into the doctor role because he magic but he is just as stressed as they are and tensions are high, and then the boy starts convulsing

Oh my god they snapped, they are actually bringing Jack to an emergency room. This is horrifying and kind of a trip to imagine what they're going to tell any authority figures about who this guy is and what their relationship is to him.

Do they remember that he has barcode fingerprints and probably is gonna be Medically Weird just as default?

(Alex is 29 like me and Misha is early 40s and Jimmy is canonically a year older than Misha for some reason, so at a push Cas could be his dad and have made some very early mistakes but the boy is biologically only like 10 years younger than them on average... JACK looks another half that at times but this is a hospital so idk if "smiles like a toddler" "early teenage adorableness" is a good measure of age)

(I'm stress-typing)

"His full name, please"

All 3 dads look at each other baffled.

Sam goes with Jack Kline, which, a season and a bit later, is the first canonical use of it as Jack's surname

They're cautious about using Winchester, understandably, but it's a nice reminder that Kelly is family too and as the dead parent, naming Jack in tribute to her should have been something they were doing all along (like, season 13 all along), especially as he even visited the Klines earlier this season. Sam being the one who thinks to do this is nice because he's the most dad-aligned to Jack in a traditional sense when it's come to raising him (Cas got the pre-birth role as the traditional father role) and Cas obviously had the strongest connection to Kelly before that but this isn't a moment about her so much as these 3 stressed dads.

LOL Date of birth. Sam wins another point for knowing it, while Dean makes back and forth guesses on '99/2000, making Jack 19 or 20, which would at least mean any one of them could have fathered him and chopping 10 years off Alex's age to compromise between look and feel.

Given Jack's symptoms the nurse should have been a lil more concerned asking about trips to West Africa or other likely Ebola places lately. (This may be poor timing on the show's part but isn't there a fresh outbreak right now?)

(Oof I googled it and there's "Congo Ebola outbreak 2nd worst in history" articles dated 6 hours ago... Maybe a bad year to write haemorraghic diseases for fun and also how comes no one is talking about this in the news and it's all blah blah brexit... Have we just stopped fearing it now a few outbreaks have shown it mostly stays contained in African countries so now they can just suffer it on their own? I'm making a 4am donation to relief efforts)

*returns from the doctors without borders website* anyway back to the fictional sick white boy

And his very stressed dads

I have no idea how much of this is medically accurate but I feel like this is particularly dramatised to match hospital visits people have experienced which did not involve bringing in a stumbling, feverish, person who is having seizures and coughing blood

it's still objectively sad to see TFW lined up all stressed out and Cas and Dean holding hands while they stare through the giant window

The doctors aren't wearing masks even though he has been COUGHING BLOOD

sheesh this entire hospital is in quarantine now

Nick saying he was "getting hammered" the night of the murder isn't super subtle

Cas aggressively still trying to watch over Jack even though they won't let him in the room. Dean paces and talks about ghouls in the middle of the hospital to let off stress.

Cas goes to watch over him in person while Sam and Dean have a personal chat. This is awful D:

I appreciate the sentiment of busting Jack out before they pay the hospital bills because they're running out of medical options and need to turn to magic ones, a la every dramatic event ever in their lives except that one time Dean broke his leg and Sam was too out of it with the Hallucifers to sell his soul to make it better, but if Jack's in system shutdown wouldn't at least keeping him with state of the art equipment mean things like transfusion and machines that keep him propped up?

Mind you his bloodtype is probably, like, X evil negative or something Bucklemingy

It's in his DNA... He might be cute but he's still born of their episodes and wacky non con ideas... It was gonna catch up to him eventually D: You can't outrun it forever!!

I accidentally hit a button and 8x02 started playing on VLC

"DEEEAN" Cas shoves him through the portal out of purgatory, credits roll, this was officially the weirdest episode ever.

(No I didn't watch the whole thing, I was literally paused on the last shot from where I was about to gif it last night when I fell asleep)

Sam already called Rowena... Smart cookie

obligatory yell at Cas shedding the coat to put on Jack so they don't walk him out in a hospital gown

Oh my god Jack's so sick he's white as a sheet and being carried out by 2 of his dads and he still has a lil well of snark to be like "fine we're leaving" to the doctor.

"There's just no talking to him when he gets like this"

We're at the promo scene and I'm still not 100% sure after sleeping on it that Rowena definitely did not have the Book of the Damned, and that she hadn't been able to make off with it at the end of season 11, never for it to be seen again, because she was very much in the process of stealing the Black Grimoire in 13x22, but this does, I guess, make sense in regards to which book would serve Jack better, and Mittens tried her best to convince me that Rowena plausibly did not have it because the Winchesters did... I'm still suspicious because I really did just assume that she took it and the implication was we didn't see it because SHE had hidden it, and from a line in a Buckleming episode as well. And either way around her showing up with it makes sense that she had it but I'd have occam's razor'd it that she stole the obvious books at the obvious times and not that 13x22 became a BotD heist on top of everything else :P

Jack is up and about!!

He's using a more gravelly voice and it's actually a really hot voice and for literally the first time the Alex/Jack divide (gulf) in my head that one is my age and hot and the other is a 12 year old is a bit shaken. I mean Jack's canonically now supposed to be around 19-20? Which explains why he has a "wooo spring break" attitude when we see in the promo he snaps and wants to go to Vegas.

They grow up so fast.

Anyway considering he was in total organ shutdown a lil while ago it seems a night's rest has done him well if he's wandering around the bunker

Can't tell if we swapped writers or what... well, it seems like it's possible given Jack's fluctuating sickness, which of course could just be a plot thing but also a mark of the inconsistencies in Buckleming episodes. It's still odd to me that in the filming process it didn't occur to them that Jack might not at least sway on the spot at little, but he's really standing there like a little trooper, upright and talking confidently.

And betraying to Rowena that his dads like her and say nice things about her behind her back, which is catastrophic for them. How dare. You're damaging the foundations of their relationship.

*cough cough*

"Bollocks"

Yep, her heart has softened, Jack won her over in record time, and she's just thinking about that time she adopted a wee Polish lad and loved him as her own because Jack is genetically engineered to be a blank slate son version of a Mary Sue. You take one look at him and he is Your Son in whatever way will most harm you.

Good grief I wish Crowley was still around to see what HILARIOUS overlap with Gavin we'd have wrung out of Jack's main superpower.

Cas offering his grace to stabilise Jack on the spot. Halp. It's more important to him that his son lives by miles, that this isn't even an internal debate for him. In a way, obvious that Cas would be like this as a parent, in another, Cas just offered to give up his grace live on TV

Rowena shoots down the obvious solution (oh and thank god that for once the show actually even references obvious solutions) and starts talking about how we need archangel grace and as soon as she says that I think "oh, Michael" and Dean starts to come over weird with a wooziness that makes me wonder if that was timed for the audience "oh there's one out there right now" and why would DEAN be personally affected right thiiiiiis second..............................

When they go on spring break together we're getting right to the murderin

I mean SOMETHING is up and Dean's right now having his own weird moment as Rowena talks about how Jack will now have a fluctuating set of symptoms for the sake of the plot so

It's possible this is just his internal POV emotional reaction to bad news because this is what happens to me when I hear it but I suspect Dean is a lil more healthy than me in the first place so doesn't verge on passing out whenever a catastrophe happens regularly. And also Sam and Cas aren't similarly struck with physical symptoms at the news their son is dying.

Ya know, Buckleming, or probably Eugenie specifically which makes it all the worse, writing this woman taking a call in a dark alleyway, then not being terrified to be approached by a weird man and on top of that stopping and turning to invite him to join her in the club... this is the kind of thing where they're writing someone going against all natural instinct that it's bad characterisation for someone we've literally never met before just to put her in danger.

I mean at least they didn't make Nick stab a random woman (and a black woman at that to add to their overall awful stats)

I like how Jack's just decided Vegas or Tahiti are places you just kinda go to die... I mean I don't know what he's learned about them but it all has to be absorbed through the media in his most innocent way. I feel like there's something very sweet about whatever he thinks you do in these places of reputed sin and blaze of glory live fast die young lifestyles, but also utterly tragic. Consumptive tragic hero but with a twist of the reckless and dangerous later tropes of... It's 5am and I can't think but like. Vegas. Drugs and gambling high life style tropey films and books from the American tradition.

And of course it's Dean (who utterly fits into this trope and even has yearly Vegas trips with Sam since discovering his psychic powers back in season 1 and also lives a blaze of glory mindset) who brings him the deadly glass of milk (film trope about innocence but also like, people dying) and a sandwich loaded with salami. Dean went all out to make that for Jack - a couple of episodes after sending a woman off to "make him a sandwich" and regretting it as he spoke, we see the yank the cloth away reveal of Dean's nurturing side where he is the caregiver who shows affection through food and will go to the trouble of making his boy a delicious sandwich.

"Nice." See? He's Dean's son and Dean approves his choice of places to die. "You sure this is the best time?"

"Pretty sure it is," Jack says, backpack on, already almost out the door. He's found a brown corduroy jacket which is both unlike his beige jackets and suits from the rest of his life aside from the blue apocalypse world one, and also very very much like Sam's iconic season 1-2 brown corduroy jacket that he mostly stopped wearing although I think was the one Dean wore in 4x01 as one of its sporadic dwindling appearances, if I'm not wrong.

I probably am but either way, it's a change to darker colours, something Sam-associated to fit the gap of this smol dangerous dying kid Dean has to deal with, and puts Jack in thick earthier tones, thicker clothes to ward against the cold of death, and dressed more like TFW than normal as he usually has quite a distinct child-like version of their clothes.

Jack's concept of life and mortality is fucked, possibly because he was a functioning being after a day or two of gathering his thoughts and starting to come to terms with asking deep philosophical questions about himself, so in a way discovering he only has a couple more weeks to live is hardly anything. He's a fucking mayfly.

Ugh it's now solidly 5am and I am clearly not going back to sleep so I give up, I'm finally getting coffee. The rest of the notes will be maybe a wee bit more coherent :P

Anyway kettle thought: due to Jack and Dean's murder or be murdered relationship (lordy how is this the only way you relate to fatherhood, my guy?) I kinda suspect that Dean's about to abscond with Jack without even telling dad 1 or dad 2, because he is dad 3 and that's totally cool and he's a responsible adult, but, you know, woozy and doomed while Jack is also consumptive and doomed. BAD COMBO.

I charge you with grounds of diminished responsibility due to mutual murder narrative doom

"I'm done being special. Before my life is over, I want to live it"

Okay remember in season 1 episode 14 where Dean was like "LOL WE SHOULD GO TO VEGAS BECAUSE YOU ARE PSYCHIC"? and I referenced that like 5 minutes ago so you should, obviously I've only ever been able to headcanon the reveal of Vegas Week in season 7 (Dabb episode, take a shot) dates back to that and is one of their between episode activities which makes sense that since they only started travelling as adults together in the canon of the show (and Sam 1 year older than drinking age) that it might as well have been when they started the tradition?

Well Jack here is reacting like Dean would have if HE were the one in Sam's shoes in 1x14, and being the fun lil brother who actually would be like fuck it let's go to Vegas and see how psychic I am in the casinos! In the context of season 1 Sam is waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too angsty and tragic to do anything other than come across as a stick in the mud who thinks Dean is joking and they're gonna carry on being tragic and hunting monsters instead. Dean in season 2, episode 9, also wanted to fuck off and go have fun when Sam's scary destiny got too much for him to carry, and that was when he was locked in the murder or save him vow from John's last words, which is a similar burden to the narrative bind he's in with Jack.

Jack, all of his fathers' son, finally shows up as the god damn first person to take his doom sensibly and actually want to fuck off to Vegas, and that's demon!Dean levels of fuck it.

Incidentally I half-suspect that Crowley, who has billions of dollars and once bid the moon in an auction (hi I watched 99% of 8x02 yesterday and 1% of it just now) probably was steering demon!Dean waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay carefully around the thought of wait a minute I have an extremely rich and powerful sugar daddy and no responsibilities... VEGAAAAAAAS.

Like, any time Dean started to form the thought, bam, naked triplets show up in their room.

Anyway Jack's busy being tragic, talking about wanting to get a tan (Beach now linked to something to do before death) or see a hockey game (oh shit we forgot Adam) or get a parking ticket (oh so that's why Dean murders him)

"And when it's all over... die."

Dean looks over his shoulder, mind made up to abduct the boy and take him joyriding

"So that's your plan, huh?"

"I don't want to waste time arguing"

"Did I say I disagree"

jack, this is Fun Dad

I know, the concept is completely radical and you've never seen Dean be fun but trust me.

Even with your very, very limited options, Sam has literally had 3 episodes about how he's Scrooge, and Cas is... Cas. But Dean is legitimately fun dad when you get him on a good day. Trust me.

No one's speaking to Rowena??? How wild.

Poor thing is never going to get her mega coven

Dean (who has rocked up already wearing his jacket) spaces out as Sam starts blahing on about the culturally appropriative shaman Ketch has located.

Same, buddy

At least Dean isn't lying to them about stealing Jack. Somewhat. Not the whole Vegas plan.

Jack smiles at Sam and Cas in a kind of way that somehow conveys in its entirety "this may be the last time you see me but I'm cool with you NOT seeing me die of coughing my lungs up and fun dad has this covered and we've always had a weird death cult about our relationship anyway so I'm okay with it and you guys were the best dads but now fun dad is going to take me out back and shoot me where you can't see and I love you bye"

"Why don't you drive?"

Jack is like ?!?!?!?!? D:

EVEN ON HIS DEATHBED he hadn't figured this would ever happen

It's the make a wish foundation :')

This is, of course, the ultimate sign of Dean loving you and caring for you in Dean's own special way of not telling you he does but showing it with a gesture of absolute confidence and letting you in, and in the vast annuls of the show dates back to the second ever episode where Dean let Sam drive at the end for all of 1 shot (seriously, they've swapped back by the long shot at the end of 1x02 where you can't see them in the car but the prop drivers are definitely doing a generic Sam in the passenger seat Dean driving routine for stock footage :P)

Anyway Dean loves Jack enough that he's letting a kid who does not know how to drive learn to drive in the Impala, like he and Sam did.

I can see Alex sweating bullets about being seated next to Jensen in the beloved Impala and having to mess up turning it on... never mind the fact that both Jensen AND Dean will murder him if he harms the car, and being murdered on both levels at once is spiritually unsettling and he will probably end up an unquiet ghost.

And yet, the glee at being behind the wheel of this legendary gal

TRAGIC NYOOOOOM

"It's like I'm you! :D"

"No, it's not! :D (but with implied murder)"

"THIS IS THE BEST DAY EVER"

Look if he survives this, you're creating a speed demon who will want his own classic car

And then you'll have to teach him how to maintain it

oh god

But yeah, non-toxic parenting in the John Winchester As He Could Have Been style.

At least as long as Dean is in the Make A Wish mode and not back to tragic murder mode

And that wooziness that he may or may not be associating with no sleep and too much stress suggests this isn't going to last as a Fun Day Trip For The Boy

"Cas are you sure you want to handle this alone?"

NO HE NEEDS A HUG HIS SON IS DYING

Sam, go hug him, you need a hug and your son is dying.

Also, of course, you mutually need each other in this instance and Sam is reaching out to Cas with presumably the intent that he wants to be in on it but is asking as if just concerned about Cas

Cas, being Cas, has somehow deduced that Dean is "taking this particularly hard" despite the fact all three of them are Concerned Dads and CAS WHAT THE FUCK are you doing being selflessly concerned about DEAN and sizing up his emotional state when all three of you are wrecked and your son is dying?

You literally have 3x the sitting at his bedside holding his hand moments of any of them and montaged the heck out of the concern at the start of the episode

I remember way back someone wankily made a chart of how often people talked to Dean about stuff and other people talked to each other about Dean, and Sam is now crying about Dean beating himself up over being mean to Jack at the start of season 13 and regretting it, so this entire conversation is Sam and Cas man paining at each other about how much man pain Dean is in.

I say with no wank in my heart, just sheer horrified amusement at this data point if they still are hate-watching the show and being horrified about how Sam never gets stuff for himself etc (I mean. He and Cas both have had extended chunks of seasons about them parenting Jack and this is Dean's time to come belatedly to what the two of them already had)

Cas finally says "son" a season and change after Jack was wandering around calling him "father" and Sam doesn't seem inclined to disagree that this is how it feels for all 3 of them.

Obviously he's crying about Jack and it was just the context above that made it look like he was crying about Dean and I always knew that, I'm not a monster, I'm just deflecting because owwwwwwwww this hurts

HUG EACH OTHER YOU DUMB FUCKS SO I FEEL BETTER

Cas walks off instead and Sam finally after 1000 years discovers how Dean feels when Cas does that when he was angling to come along and they miscommunicated and didn't say what they meant. Except Sam wanted to come out of mutual Dad Angst comfort while Dean normally wants to go with Cas places so he can hold his hand.

Jack's so proud of himself for being able to drive.

"Born with a wheel in your hand"

He literally stole the Impala from you when he was 7 months in the womb

Dean is like, we could get you laid? And Jack is like. Nah. I have a better idea.

No idea what right now but he still doesn't wanna bang anyone

Ugh a Nick scene. Tag yourself I'm the old tyre in the foreground

Is this the house from Family Remains aka the self-admitted worst episode of the show by Kripke and Carver's explicit design

I am going to puke Jack wanted to go on a fishing trip with his dad

There were spoilers about them doing this but I repressed it the fuck down and lied to myself that Jensen was randomly teaching Alex to fish on set because I didn't want to think about Dean doing this with Jack because oh my god someone has taken my heart and gouged it out with a rusty spoon.

Also: someone design Jack a t-shirt with a witty slogan about fishing rather than hook ups. Like, dude bro fishing culture but in a world where you're as likely to get dumb slogans about not wanting sex as you are for it making you a babe magnet

"I'd rather be fishin" is a thing people get on mugs for the workplace but we could start with this sentiment and play

ALSO AS I MENTIONED I WATCHED 8x02 IN THE LAST 24 HOURS AND DEAN NEAR RIVERS SUCKS. We also have 10x01 and Daniel the fishing angel (who was the pizza man from Monster Movie, see above: slogans about fishing, pizza man innuendo, we got a thing going here) who was happy on Earth just fishing and enjoying the planet and not wanting to go back to Heaven, in a very heavy metaphor for Cas to deal with, as the angel who once compared free will to teaching poetry to fish. Lots and lots to unpack here, when we turn this into a Dean and Jack father son bonding moment and throw in Dean's peaceful dream of fishing in 4x20 that Cas interrupted. Fishing is about peace and idyll and comes as a temporary respite in this show. Traditionally, also, of course it's a sport of patience, and a classic father son bonding activity as the long stillness allows for both manly silence and sharing beers in peace, but also talk if they want to open up a conversation.

For Jack, it's an overlap of both Cas and Dean parental stuff, Cas's issues with angelic nature, where he wants to be, WHO he wants to be (just OFFERING to give up his grace to save Jack) and then with Dean we have more classic human cultural tropes but none less painful for Jack's nature and relationships. Especially throwing in that this was his choice and Dean is indulging him completely here.

John may or may not have taught them to fish but I feel like it may have had a "so you are dying in the woods" aspect to it rather than for peace and bonding. BOBBY taught Sam and Dean some basic woodsmanship so he was more likely to be the father figure teaching them to fish if anyone did.

Okay so obviously I typed that just after clutching my heart at the reveal and hitting pause, as Jack immediately goes on to say that John DID teach Dean how to fish and that it was his happiest memory of him - and it comes as a surprise for the expectations (like, that the above paragraph now stands as what I would expect of canon if I was only taking from it and not as an actual writer of the show being allowed to insert new details in which challenge us about the characters, which is where I find the line between fan fic and original fiction really is when it comes to characterisation... Anything out of left-field and you have to tag it as an AU version or explain why instead of just writing it as taken for granted).

And it's unexpected in the sense that it is such a peaceful thing and above all I think the message is that Jack intuited from whatever Dean said about it that it WAS a happy peaceful memory of John which stood so much at odds with the rest of his life. Filed under as well the thing where Mary started talking about how nice John was to Sam and Sam recoiled in confusion until Mary clarfied it was her John, not theirs. Good memories of a gentle soft John are alarming, and yet perhaps this is a way to really confront and exorcise his ghost more than anything - the sort of funeral servive memorialising of the good with the bad and working through it to come to peace in a different sort of way that lets the wounds heal and the anger leave those scars.

"It was how you said it. I could tell." He's such a smart cookie and I think that often takes Dean by surprise in the sense that Jack has been very shrewdly watching him and learning from him and absorbing anything and everything he does, which unfortunately gives him the ability to cold read Dean like very few people do, seeing past the layers and bluffs and into Dean's core.

Jack just murdered Dean by saying if he doesn't make it he wouldn't miss Tahiti or the Taj Mahal or implied going to seedy bars and hooking up, he'd miss more time with Dean.

I mean that's not a literal way to kill someone but you should see Dean's face. He's been shot.

And again, it's a metaphor for what you want from life for DEAN to absorb, the prompt that his family is right here and he doesn't need to chase pleasure outside of them, that hook up bar nearby their home base where he never strikes out, that's irrelevant to the family he has built and it's been put in the subtext of what Dean goes after that's empty pleasure when he has this core family unit around him, by the way Jack has also rejected it and is explaining to Dean the real meaning of Christmas.

Of course, this all gets a bit weird unless you account for the fact he has an angel wearing a trenchcoat made of husband material waiting back at the Bunker because the chronic singleton life otherwise probably ought to account for an outlet for Dean like a hook up bar if his happy ending is a platonic family bond so, you know, end the show 10 minutes from now with everyone happy and alive and not dying, and all Dean's learned is they're 3 dads, one son, a mom and her AUBobby, but he still has unused romantic potential and for seasons and seasons they've been trying to close the door on him seeking out random hook ups in the subtext of what Dean WANTS vs what he thinks he can have. This frank conversation about what Jack wants from life before it's all over is once again ignoring fleeting human connection for the family bonds he values above everything.

"I've had a good life, Dean" the other reason they're having this sentimental conversation by a river is because Jack is a fucking mayfly and I hate this

@ Dabb please never make me see Cas driving this car ever again

Why are you irritating Cas like this. First boring holy fire oh it must be thursday followed by the indignity of making him sit on a pouffe? Listen, when Cas gets irritated he gets snarky and then people die because he snarked them to death. I saw it he did it to the Empty. And Lucifer in 13x12. And Kip.

I just feel sorry for Cas. Why can't he go on fishing trips with the boy. Oh no he has to sit on a squishy pouffe that won't let him be intimidating so that he can cure the boy even though Jack's already decided he's gonna die and will probably Ophelia himself into the river at the end of the fishing trip.

Sergei is basically like "Have you tried turning it off and on again"

Nephilim have a reboot button on the back of their neck, if you get a paperclip and poke it in there.

At least Sergei is so... whatever he is... I can't even tell who he is supposed to be offensive towards :P I guess with the name, I lean Russian, and then he has world esoterica and occult nonsense in his caravan...

The real question is how does he know anything about Nephilim and why hasn't Cas asked that already.

LOL he has a vial of Gabriel grace just lying around. Of course, because Gabriel was just offering it up to everyone.

Considering how he was exploited for it by Asmodeus there's a weird tinge of retconning his own abuse by saying he was going around giving it to everyone before Asmodeus ever bought him and started stealing it on the regular.

Still, it IS awfully tempting a fix to have Uncle Gabriel help Jack out from beyond.

/distantly: "I'm not dead!"

sometimes I can still hear his voice.

It's way more likely Shit Goes Down and this is lost but then Cas has learned what to do with archangel grace to fix Jack just so long as they can pin down Michael and grab his instead.

But I guess in that circumstance at least once again Gabriel gave them part of the answer from beyond the grave as he did in season 5.

("Still not dead!!")

shush Gabriel. The show wants us to think you're dead and my complete disbelief in that doesn't change anything for now.

Except that maybe Gabriel came back, is fine, but has been removing his grace and selling it in the here and now while claiming not to be Gabriel and that he just haaaappens to have it and because he has no grace he could just be any old guy who happens to have an endless renewable resource of archangel grace secretly on tap to sell to fund his life of laying low. Sergei even says HE got it as part of keeping Gabriel hidden.

I'm kind of assuming Sergei isn't Gabriel unless he offers Cas kielbasa

I mean unless later I get a bonus cookie for immediately assuming Sergei is Gabriel based on the holy fire he just happened to have prepared and how similar it looked to Gabriel being trapped in 5x08.

On the other hand this may be the first time this season but pointing at literally everyone and going, that's probably Gabriel, will get old and also dock me cookie points the more wrong guesses I throw out there. Still, this one has pretty strong evidence, from messing with Cas to making him say "Porn stars"

To, um, having Gabriel's grace

Okay so Sergei gives Cas all of this out of the goodness of his heart and a "you owe me" and I AM wondering if that's a Buckleming special because remember in 8x19 where they were like hi we need to go to Hell immediately, and Ajay was like sure, I will take you to Hell and this episode is even titled after me so clearly I am an important character who *stab stab reaper dying noises* wow look I guess we don't have a bargain after all despite me saying you owe me but then Crowley just maaaaagically made it so you never had to find out what a reaper would want in exchange for taking you to Hell off the books.

Also fuck you I never got to finish my pizza

While I've been typing some random ass justice for Ajay screed, Nick has revealed a flashback to 14x02 where it turns out his neighbour said it was a cop who he saw coming out of the house. I literally went back and checked the episode and that wasn't in it, so perhaps it's a new flashback for here, fleshing out that conversation and revealing more for us, and changing the narrative of what Nick's up to, but honestly who cares enough about all this... I was double zoned out for flashbacks I'd already seen for a side story i don't care about

Wow, Nick, demons killed ya family. Could have told you that.

Aw, Dean brought Jack home. No dying out in the wilderness for you, clearly Cas phoned up before Jack could work out his plan to fling himself into the river.

Also Nick has taken up too much of this episode so there's no room for complicated twists and turns, if Buckleming are banned from introducing too many of them.

It's incredible how subdividing them so Eugenie writes all the Nick stuff and Brad writes the rest has elevated the parts of the story we care about to pretty much passable, give or take whatever Sergei was and who he was offensive to aside from the whole concept of calling yourself a shaman because you travelled the world collecting occult stuff in a sort of Aleister Crowley way.

'cept you can't namedrop Aleister on this show because both Alastair and Crowley have stolen too much from him.

So you get a knock off Sergei instead.

Jack hasn't been having as many of the supposed fainting fits that had everyone dogpiling him as I thought - maybe that's next episode too. Could have had one at the start but that doesn't seem enough to be a repeated annoyance of Alex's life :P

Anyway I was just going to comment on his sweater but that thought hopped in there first wondering if the spell was about to knock him flat, as he's sitting on a chair instead of safely in bed.

All the more dramatic for flinging yourself around if the spell messes you up

(honestly if the spells don't work, and they took him out of the hospital, how much of a bizarre commentary is this on trusting modern medicine and vaccinating your nephilims?)

It's 7:20 and my neighbours are yelling again

At least being awake since 3 meant I got a bit more peace and quiet than normal. I feel gross but I may go to yoga just to not be stuck in this room with such awful screeching on both sides of me >.>

Oh I can tell Sergei is Gabriel, he put the grace in a gold container instead of the silver ones

I'm sorry for the expenses, Zerbe

I wonder if they use her products on the show and I'm gonna go on my dash and find her beaming about a specially commissioned shiny gold grace that she made for them :P

"Here, hold this bottle of your uncle's essence"

".... okay I understand how weird that sounded on hindsight"

I love the idea of Jack's grace now being fuelled by Nice Uncle Gabriel who felt kindly towards him, even if this can't be a permanent fix, it changes his internal make up just a bit so that he symbolically has his grace stolen by his shitty bio father but the power only came from him in the first place and there was all the hoo ha about if Lucifer as his father made him inherently evil. Now whatever happens to Jack, he's had a grace transplant from a suitable donor, very much like a parallel of say he needed a kidney transplant and his 2 viable donors were his shitty deadbeat dad who gave him the kidney condition in the first place and his nice dead uncle who happened to have been an organ donor and was the only other one with the same type (if Lucifer's was X evil negative, then I guess Gabriel's is like X tricksy negative which has enough receptors to be a compatible transfusion, while Cas has like, Z dumbass positive grace and no compatibility)

And Gabriel is a beloved character who proved his kind feeling towards Jack even if they had very little bonding overall, he clearly cared and there was an immediate sort of uncle-y kindness about him in relation to Jack (just the comment alone about identifying that Jack liked shiny things and magic tricks is very much how uncles view small children who they may watch and entertain but not in the end have parental responsibility for), which is hilarious to me because Gabriel deeply reminds me of all 3 of my uncles on my mum's side, who are all 3 different shades of trickster god in their own right, and he always has reminded me of them, and now the show has sort of made Uncle Gabriel his new legacy.

I mean. I love it to bits.

It's not a sacrifice FOR Jack like Cas would have given up his grace, but it's still a part of him passed on to Jack.

I am very very aware that like me running my mouth about John (ironically the name of one of my uncles) while hitting pause, I've stopped while Jack is looking up with glowing eyes and he's almost certainly about to spew a fountain of blood across the room and fall on the floor. But I like that the grace even interacted with him and lit up his eyes and unless he physically barfs out the grace to I'm sticking by that ramble.

Cas smiled!! That's the once per season and we already hit it at episode 7, woe betide us

This does look, however, like the scene where they were all looking on from the door so... blood spew in 5 4 3 2 1...

DOGPILE THE BOY

Er, I mean, help him

God I would not want Jared to dogpile me, the man weighs literally as much as an actual moose

Uhoh Sergei made Cas mad

I mean

he made him sit on a pouffe, this was always coming

What do you mean Eugenie can't let Lucifer go wow what a shock

*kicks a pebble*

Ah, here's the concerned dads scene. I'm just going to let that be a balm to my soul while Dean laments ever taking Jack out to have fun.

"You made him happy. You did more for him than any of us"

1 dude you tried, 2 you took him on hunting trips and had fun already this season so he got his Cas Time before he died like he wanted 3 just fucking abduct him wrapped in a duvet and go fishing in the dead of night if you have to, trust me, he'd love it and your family is such a mess he wouldn't even think it's weird.

I mean you've literally absconded illegally with him before, what's a trip up to that beach where he was born and some fishing gear really going to cost you with annoyance from Dean

"What can we do?" "Watch over him," Rowena says with Cas in the background, and continues to carve me out with a rusty spoon

"As he dies"

Nah he'll be fine shut up Rowena D:

*whimper*

Well that was a very good episode if you act like me and pretend that none of the Nick stuff happened at all.

#14x07 #season 14 spoilers #my stuff

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tarisilmarwen · 6 years ago

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I’m late for #rebelsremembered ‘cause I had to be a responsible adult all day but now I’m here and Imma just talk about my favorite episodes because cripes this show is so good uhhggnnnn.

And there are honestly so many episodes I love so I kinda had to narrow it down to just three per season. So here they are!

Season One: “Gathering Forces”, “Path of the Jedi”, “Idiot’s Array”

The midseason two-parter that was “Empire Day” and “Gathering Forces” was when I knew the show was playing for keeps and getting serious about consistent continuity and dramatic storytelling. “Gathering Forces“ is my favorite of the two, mostly due to the culmination of Ezra’s character growth moment and the deepening of his and Kanan’s master-padawan surrogate father/son relationship.

The moment where Ezra channels the Dark Side to save Kanan is Iconic(TM) and totally a scene I’d show to an outsider to sell them on the show.

“Path of the Jedi“ continues the dramatic fun and character growth and also gives Ezra his unique lightsaber which is just awesome and satisfying to watch.

And “Idiot’s Array“ is just hilarious and fun.

Season Two: “Legends of the Lasat“, “The Call“, “Twilight of the Apprentice“

Journey Into The Star Cluster baby. Just... the music and the gorgeous animation and the deep lore dive into the mysticism of the Force outside the traditional Jedi-Sith dichotomy aaaaah it’s just a beautiful episode.

I always loved “The Call“ and what it did for Ezra and his character development long before his connection to the purrgil became plot relevant lol.

And of course I would be remiss if I didn’t mention “Twilight of the Apprentice“. It’s a popular choice but I like it more for the change in status quo, the effect on Ezra and Kanan’s character development, the reintroduction of Maul as a personal threat to the Ghost crew, rather than the Ahsoka-Vader confrontation. (Though that’s good too.) It’s dark and bleak and it’s the death of innocence and such a good mature story all around.

Season Three: “Imperial Supercommandos”, “Through Imperial Eyes“, “Twin Suns”

It was a hard toss-up between “Imperial Supercommandos” and “Visions and Voices” because on the one hand you have Ezra and Sabine battle-tag-teaming and being awesome together and on the other you have creepy horror-movie-esque peril with Maul. Ultimately I’m gonna hafta to go with the episode that officially made me ship Sabezra. Stupid cute dorks in love that own my heart now how dare you two.

“Through Imperial Eyes“ stressed me the hell out when it aired because of how tense the intrigue and close calls were, and it was such a rush all the way through. Add in Thrawn being his creepy awesome self and the delicious Ezra peril and you have the perfect recipe for an episode I rewatch over and over again.

“Twin Suns“ is one of the two Rebels episodes that made me cry. Like, gasping sobbing tears, gotta-pause-playback-and-compose-myself kinda crying. Ezra’s spiritual journey across the desert, the symbolism and arc-welding, his character growth, it’s all just so so good.

Season Four: “Flight of the Defender”, “The World Between Worlds“, “Family Reunion and Farewell“

I had been looking forward to “Flight of the Defender“ all season and it did not disappoint, with cute Ezra-Sabine interaction, Thrawn being stoicly implacable, awesome flying action sequences, and the first glimpses of the Loth-wolves. Plus cute Loth-cat bits. It’s very rewatchable.

“The World Between Worlds“ is just... there are no words to describe how much it adds to Star Wars’ lore and mythology and how beautiful it is. It’s got beautiful animation and music, the themes are pitch perfect, it’s got EMPEROR PALPATINE freaking menacing our heroes. And that ending sequence is just perfect signature scene material.

I WILL FOREVER LOVE THE FINALE TO THE END OF TIME. Beautiful and poetic and amazing and thrilling and oh my gosh I love Ezra so much you guys haskfhkajfsh. This episode is pitch perfect and I love it to pieces.

#star wars #spoilers #rebelsremembered #sabezra #ezra bridger #star wars rebels

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icharchivist · 5 years ago

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hey icha whats hypmic??

Heyaaa and ooooh dear where do i even begin…..

Erg so in very short it’s a musical mixed media story that have kind of a corny set up that is mostly an excuse to have fictional male characters of different background involve themselves into rap battles? Most of its content comes from songs and drama CD, even if there are a few manga adaptation covering a couple of the drama tracks (albeit all those covered are how the teams got together and all).

In a little more depth: Basically a group of 12 Seiyuu decided to band together into a principe of rap battle, that would also give a spotlight to multiple rap artists in Japan, as they do collaboration by writting/composing the songs. All of the Seiyuu play different characters divided in 4 divisions: Buster Bros!! for Ikebukuro, Mad Trigger Crew for Yokohama, Fling Posse for Shibuya, and Matenrou for Shinjuku. Each divisions/characters have distinct styles of music or text to differenciate them.

The idea is that, after World War 3 and a lot of the population dying, weapons causing harms had been outlawed, instead remplaced by what we call Hypnosis Microphone (or Hypmic), weapons that attack the brain via its sonic vibes, thus are more powerful depending on how savy you are with words and sounds and all of that. (like i said, it’s corny, it’s really just a pretext for the battles ahah)

The Government, that is kinda shady, took hold into Chuuouku, the center of the city, and the rest of the towns are left to fend for their own, indulging in territories battles. By the time the story start, 4 teams have taken a hand into 4 divisions where they try their best to low the crime rate and make life better, this sort of stuff. Recently however, the Government decided to keep a closer eye on the Rap Battle themselves, organizing huge Event in Chuuouku for the Divisions to fight each other, and the winner can therefore have major impact on what gets developped in the city and all.

It’s also important to know that the 4 leaders of the divisions, Ichiro, Samatoki, Ramuda and Jakurai, used to be in a band together, The Dirty Dawg, and they were very close - Something ended up breaking up the band (it is unsure what it is exactly) and left them with sort of bittersweet relationship with each other as they’re now in a position where they have to fight each other.

Again though most of it is mostly a pretext for songs and character driven plotlines for those 12 to fuck shit up:

youtube

(here a link to the translation, and here’s a link for the playlist of the songs they put on youtube - mostly previews except for the Ensemble songs - i can send the full songs/drama CDs but in private since it’s… illegal and all.You’ll find all the translations out on this website, and here you’ll find the drama tracks. And there for the solo songs only but idk how long this website will keep them up.)

(btw here’s the second ensemble song and here’s the third one - i tend to prefer them to the first one so here they are)

So like i said, corny, but character driven and i love those morons, and the songs are bangers, and i ended up loving it ways too much.

I’ll enter more in depth on the Divisions under the cut bc i do think knowing a bit the characters give a better idea but yeah kdjfhd my latest obsession rip.

If you’re reading this i’m so sorry i’m going to geek out over my 12 stupid sons.

btw (MC: ___) is their scene names, basically.

And erg while i try to avoid spoilers from the latest season, there’s a lot of “spoilers” from backstory exposition or information spreads through the drama tracks and the songs, so either just scroll to see the name and all or read at your own risks?

Buster Bros!!! representing Ikebukuro Division - in red, Ichiro Yamada (19yo) the leader,in blue, Jiro Yamada (16yo), in yellow Saburo Yamada (14). (Previews of their solo songs, preview of their first group song Ikebukuro West Game Park, their second group song: Ohayo Ikebukuro!)

Ichiro, Jiro and Saburo are brothers - they are orphans (unknown why but since Ichiro rejects any fathr figure p strongly i think it’s linked to their father) and Ichiro, the eldest brother, had taken care of his two little brothers most of his life to the point of being a delicant before being recruited by the Dirty Dawg. Before the story started the boys weren’t all that close, but by now, both little brothers want to prove their worth to their eldest brothers and when the Dirty Dawg broke up and Ichiro had to figure out which team to make for the Rap Battles, both brothers offered to help. Despite both being ways too young for this they still both ended up proving themselves. They also tend to fight for their big brother’s attention a lot.

Ichiro (MC Big Brother) himself seems to be a rather warm and friendly person - he works odd jobs all around town, kind of like a mercenary but doing just… any sort of work being asked of him, just not in the illegal stuff when he can avoid it. He’s rather hot headed. He used to be very close from the Dirty Dawg who took care of him when they met, especially Samatoki, but since the band’s break up, it seems there is a particularly sour relationship with Samatoki neither of them are over with. Ichiro often disses Samatoki out of nowhere in his raps lmao. Aside from that he’s a complete geek and loves manga and anime and video game - all the stuff you’d expect.

Jiro, (MC Middle Brother) the second, tends to follow Ichiro’s path a lot, being a bit in delincance and stuff, creating himself a web of contacts. He tends to copy Ichiro in his passions in order to impress him. He’s also very social and get friends very easily. He’s constantly bickering with Saburo who seems to see their “brotherhood” as a competition. They used to be very close when they were younger but now they’re always at each other’s throat.

Saburo (MC Little Brother), the third, doesn’t really want to follow the path of his brothers but he wants to be useful in his own way. Incredibly clever, he is a very good hacker and can find information very quickly. He also has some of the sickest burn of the lot but i’m biased. Unlike Jiro, Saburo is really not social at all and has very few friends. His whole world is about being the best he can be for Ichiro.He likes things that can stimulate his brian, especially board games and the likes.

Mad Trigger Crew, representing Yokohama Divison- Center in white, Samatoki Aohitsugi(25) the Leader - with glasses, Juuto Iruma (29), in military uniform, Riou Busujima Manson (28).(Previews of their solo songs, preview of their first group song: Yokohama Walker, their second group song: Dead Pools)

If The BB are linked by the fact they’re brothers, MTC is linked by being….. Involved in armed illegal activities? Samatoki is the second in command of a Yakuza family, Juuto is a corrupted cop who is close to Samatoki because of… work…. and Riou kinda ended up tagging along. Anyway they’re in charge of Yokohama which seems to be a part of the city that suffered pretty badly from the war and have high crime rates.

In more details, Samatoki (MC Mr Hardcore) is involved in the mafia. He explains in his personal song that his mother killed his abusive father before killing herself, leaving him to take care of his little sister, Nemu, which is what led him to a life of crime. His Yakuza clan seems to have a honor code though so they’re not involved in too much dirty stuff. Every sacrifice Samatoki did was for his sister. So obviously he saw a bit of himself in Ichiro when they originally met, and was one of the influencial force to keep Ichiro out of the crime life knowing pretty well where it’s headed. The Band breakup left a particularly sour taste in Samatoki’s mouth regarding Ichiro, feeling betrayed by whatever happened back then, and since then he tends to be. touchy. when it’s question of Ichiro. As in, almost caused a car crash while he wasn’t driving just thinking about Ichiro. He’s a mess. He’s also very short tempered.

Juuto (MC 45 Rabbit) is a corrupted cop: while he works with the police and all the stuff, he has ties with Samatoki’s yakuza clan and will do shady stuff in order to maintain this alliance. Mostly blackmail, bailing Samatoki out of jail, all this sort of things. He seems to have a specific reason to accept it, a necessary evil to get rid of wickedness in the city. Juuto’s backstory was only developped in the latest drama tracks so it would count as spoilers but let’s say he has reasons to do so.He’s generally more down to earth and more tongue in cheek. He knows how to pick up people’s weaknesses let’s say.

Riou (MC Crazy M) is an army man who isn’t aware the war is over. He has been living in survival mode in the forest of Yokohama for the past few years, having also one of the prototype Hypnosis Mic, with more raw power. His hobbies is to cook from… unusual sources. Samatoki and Juuto are terrified by his cooking. There isn’t much revealed yet about Riou’s backstory however. Juuto found out about him and put him in contact with Samatoki when it was question to develop MTC, and they have since then developped a companionship of sort.

Fling Posse, representing Shibuya Division (also they’re my favs❤ which will be obvious in two mins bc i rambled much more about them holy fuck)- In the middle with pink hair, Ramuda Amemura (24), with brown hair, Gentaro Yumeno (24), with blue hair, Dice Arisugawa (20)(Previews of their solo songs, preview of their first group song, Shibuya Marble Texture, their second group song: Stella (aka my most listened hypmic song that made me unhealthily obsessed with the series) )

I don’t even know where to start with them. Don’t be fooled by how cute they look, they’re the most shady group. Officially, they’ve all been recruited by Ramuda “only for the thrill of it”, “To kill boredom”, but it also happens that they are the three with the most ties to the government. But none of them tend to really talk about it. Not really. They are very “living in the present” kind of people, even if it comes with risks. Ramuda gathered them for his own agenda. Neither Gentaro nor Dice knew each other before Ramuda put them together and neither know why Ramuda gathered them aside as “for the thrill”. Gentaro however has major doubts over the kind of person Ramuda is.

Ramuda (MC Easy R) is their leader. He is a fashion designer. He was the one who put the Dirty Dawg together back in the days, and seems to have… weird reasons to do anything he’s ever doing. Honestly i don’t know how to even touch how shady he is, but he’s all shade of shady. He will however always sound super cute. The only person he seems to not bear the sight of is Jakurai, his ex-teammate from the Dirty Dawg. They used to be very close but now things are very tense in between them, mostly with Ramuda setting as much distances as possible he can and hardly managing to remain cheerful around him.

Gentaro (MC Phantom) is a writter and also a chronic liar. You litterally cannot trust a single thing coming out of his mouth, he’s always making something up. His personal song is supposed to talk about his past but there’s like, a big lie in the begining of it (”I was born in winter” yOU’RE BORN ON APRIL THE FIRST.). One thing that is certain about him however, is that he has a friend who is very sick and at the hospital and that it seems to be the motivation behind all of his lies, as he started to make up fictions to cheer up his friend and turned his own life into a fiction by extension. There’s more shady stuff about him and his past, i could discuss it for hours (he’s my fav kdhfd). But mostly, he’s just the kind to tease people a lot and to not really expect to have friends that stick arounds, considering himself a untrustworthy unredeemable trash. He has a weird dynamic with his own sense of self, always making up false selves. I legit could talk for hours about it kdjhfd. He tends to over-tease Dice because Dice falls for every single of his lies, and he tends to have a soft spot for him. He’s also extremely observant since he writes story he makes up from people he observes, so he catches on stuff more easily. Gentaro’s lyrics are often more inclined toward poetry or well, work of fictions (he wrote Stella in verse and Stella is kindof a Posse!Au of how Gentaro sees the Posse. Stellaaaaaa)

Dice (MC Dead or Alive) is… a professional disaster? Joke aside, he’s a gambler who tends to push his luck a loooot. (there’s a lot of implications about how he doesn’t have a stable place to crash in because most of his rent money go into gambling). His outlook on life are really mostly that he wants to live a life that gives him legit thrills. He hates being bored. It’s heavily implied that he comes from a rich, influencial family but threw it all away for his addiction. The only reason he agreed to join the Posse was for the thrill the rap battles would provide. He also kinda considers himself a lowrate trash due to the lifestyle he’s living.He’s rather guilible, falling for every single of Gentaro’s lies despite how obvious they are, and gets teased a lot by both of his teammates. He’s also fiercely protective and combative. He is also the king of bad decisions and of having to drag his posse in them. (well mostly Gentaro). He’s also loves the Posse in itself and is the one who’s the most likely to brag about how great his band is. He genuinely loves his teammates and it makes me so soft,,. He’s also very perceptive, realizing very quickly when his teammates are changing their mood. And again he protecc,,

Matenrou - Representing Shinjuku DivisionCenter with purple hair: Jakurai Jinguji (35), the blond is Hifumi Izanami (29) and the gingerhead is Doppo Kannonzaka (29)(Previews of their solo songs, preview of their first group song, Shinjuku Style, their second group song: Papiyon that wasn’t put on youtube yet but should in a couple of weeks)

Matenrou is the band with the darkest aesthetic, protecting the Shinjuku’s division that came to be known mostly for the health problems, if i understand well also because the only functioning hospital is located there. Jakurai is a doctor and Doppo is his patient, while Hifumi is Doppo’s childhood friend and roomate. They end up tangled together after Hifumi gets threats on his life pushing Doppo to reach out for Jakurai, who took an interest on them as possible teammates when everything unfolded.

Jakurai (MC ill-Doc) is… an interesting character i dare not to spoil the backstory of but let’s say he has some dark past. As a person however, he is fascinated by people’s psychee, how they work, what pushes them to do stuff, and is therefore attracted to “interesting people”, people that makes him want to explore human’s psychee. Back in the Dirty Dawg’s day, it was what drove Jakurai to be very interested in Ramuda…. Until he considered Ramuda’s humanity too lost to be saved after the band broke up, which Jakurai blames partially on Ramuda. Ramuda remains the only person to have ever made Jakurai lose his patience. Otherwise, Jakurai is a rather collected and a very kind man, who tries to reach out and help others when he can. But again, dark past and stuff and some shady stuff went on with Ramuda. He found an interest in Doppo and Hifumi as he got to know them and now is rather protective of the two of them, often going fishing with Hifumi and doing anything to uplift Doppo.He’s also a terrible drinker. Don’t let him drink.He has one of my favorite solo song though and he has a sort of goth existantialism vibe to him i just love.

Hifumi (MC Gigolo) is Doppo’s childhood best friend and roomate. Now Hifumi’s story is a bit huh.. particular. When he was very young he had had a very traumatic experience with women that led him to be utterly terrified of being even nearby one. When he reached adulthood, he considered he couldn’t keep going like that and forced himself into a woman dominated space by becoming a Host, to overcome his fear. It was so hard on him however that he ended up… coping by considering that when he was wearing the Suit of the Host, he was a complete different person. Not quite split personality, but autosuggestion mostly. He gets into all sort of troubles with the suit on however. The only person he relies completely on is Doppo, whom he knows from childhood and with whom he lives. Hifumi is a good cook, and is always trying to cheer up his friend. because…

Doppo (MC Doppo) is an anxious disaster of a man. He’s your typical overworked office worker, who is handling this life pretty badly. He feels like his whole life is something he should be apologizing for, which he does all the time. He’s honestly unhealthily anxious and that’s why he is Jakurai’s patient. He’s seriously a depressed, anxious disaster who’s only light seems to mostly be that Hifumi cheers on him all the time… when Hifumi doesn’t create a terrible situation Doppo feels like he has to apologize for. However Doppo is someone you can rely on, with a lot of frustration bottled inside him to the point of it becoming an amazing weapon once unleashed with the rap battles. He’s very quick and ressourceful when put into extreme lifethreatening situation, which got Jakurai’s attention a lot.

So this is the main divisions and characters. There are more developped via the drama CDs obviously, more plot and all, but that’s the gist of it. Honestly again it’s just a pretext for characters and songs that fits their characters.

I personally never expected to care about it that much - i have friends who had been talking about it for over a year and i just knew it a bit in passing until i started to casually listen to the songs - and then i went down the rabbit hole when i ended up loving the songs too much to not care for the characters. (Stella was my breaking point though. The moment it came out I was lost. This was the moment i dedicated myself to it. I could go on a full ramble just on Stella alone.)

And yeah it kinda shows i have a major bias but my favs are truly the Posse - both as characters and as music style goes. Close second is Matenrou though i love their aesthetics.

the first battle season is over, it’s easy to know from their youtube how it unfolded ahah. The first round was BB VS MTC, the second FP VS MTR. Each rounds came with drama CD setting up the dynamics of the characters in and out of their bands, which was pretty cool.

After the First Battle Season ended we were blessed with a drama track and song from the Dirty Dawg era which is why i cannot stop shutting the fuck up about it dkjhfd it makes me so sad to look back to how close they were and how they threw all of this away….

Now a new season is starting but this is where we’re missing translations so we just… wait.

There are a few manga that covers a few of the drama tracks but not all, and there will be a mobile game soon.

But yeah that’s. that’s basically the basis.

And it is far too entertaining to me kdjhfd

and i probably shouldn’t have written all of that with a killer headache but i,, love they,,,

so yeah this is all there is to know. If you’ve read it this far… i admire your patience. Thank u

And take care!

#ichafantalks hpm #ay ay ay!#long post for ts #if the cut doesn't work dkfhdf #draculater #ichareply

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btssmutficslovingfan01 · 5 years ago

Text

King of Love (Oneshot)

Pairing: Jin x (Female) Reader

Genre: Time Travel, Non-idol au, Fluff, Smut, Slight Angst, Oneshot

Warnings: Sir kink, creampie, cunnilingus, fingering, blowjob, Dom! Seokjin, Sub! Reader

Words: 3k+

A/N: Happy Jin day!!!

“You’re a star, Seokjin. A real star.” The happy couple walks out, hand in hand.

“I take it the ring is a good sign?” Jin smirks at the blushing blond.

“Yeah. Yoongi’s treating me real well.” He replies under his breath.

“Promise rings this early? Wow, you must really like each other.” Jin stamps his paper, and he pushes his glasses further up the bridge of his nose.

“Seriously, thanks a lot, Jin hyung.” The man locks eyes with him, just as his boyfriend walks in through the door.

“Yoongi,” He smiles at the older man, as he walks in through the door.

“Seokjin. I see that you’ve certainly taken your work to another level,” Yoongi kicks aside a file from a previous client aside. “Perhaps this is too much, why don’t you take a break and try finding someone for yourself?” Jin freezes at the comment. He’d definitely thought of dating way back before he even became a matchmaker, but nothing worked out for him. All of the girls he approached just ran away claiming he was too “narcissistic” and “self absorbed.” He loves himself, but every single girl he meets says he’s too selfish. So what? He has a stable career, money, a house, and a snazzy new car. He doesn’t need to date to be happy. But he has to admit, seeing his friends in love and holding hands and stealing kisses is kinda cute. Just a little bit. But nothing Jin wanted for himself-he just wanted to see people in love with his efforts, of course. Whether it’s a man or woman, a man and another man, or two women, Jin tries to keep everything fair and equal within his office. That’s why he has such high ratings. He has even been scouted by tv show producers to film a reality show about him, but he wanted to keep his business low on the radar, since some of what he was doing was illegal. He helped people run away before, and start lives anew. He’s even helped a couple prisoners escape, but that was only because he knew they were innocent. Seokjin is a good man. And his friends wanted someone else to see that too. A special person to change his life for the better

“Let’s go have dinner. It’s getting late.” The younger man looks down at his worried boyfriend as he grabs his arms.

“He’s right, you know?” A deep voice resounds through the room.

“Taehyung? What are you doing here?” Jin looks at his younger brother as the man with wondrous grey eyes strolls into the office.

“I’m trying to convince you to get some pussy. Leave before it gets too dark. You know how there’s a curfew now.” His eyes darken as he takes a breath and grabs a folder from the desk.

“That can’t be the reason why you’re here.”

He sits back down at his desk and begins writing.

“Again, I’ll say it--you need a girlfriend.” Yoongi pushes his palm towards Jin, and Seokjin is thrusted against the wall, his head thudding against the wall as he sank deeper and deeper into the floor.

“Mr. Ford, your appointment is scheduled for Saturday, the 14th.” He overhears a receptionist speaking. That’s strange, he didn’t recall hiring a woman on staff.

“Thank you, I will see you then, Linda.” Linda? He doesn’t know anyone with that name.

“Y/N?” He sees you look up at the sound of your own name, as you quickly pick up your book before running to the desk.

“You said they do therapy here, right? Like not massages, but with a chaise, and a person to just talk to?” Jin listens in on the conversation, hiding behind a plant.

“Yes, uhhhh, let’s see, Dr. Harry is busy, and so is Patricia, let me see if-”

“I’ll take her!” Jin finds himself moving before even thinking. “Dr. Seokjin, I’m a local therapist working in...Kim Enterprises.”

“Um, do you work here?” You ask.

“Yes. I’m actually a matchmaker, but I also study human behavior.” He truthfully explains it to you.

“Lie down here. You can tell me about your troubles. Everything is confidential and safe with me.” Jin reassures you. You simply give him a smile and follow his instructions.

“Let me see...so my day started out great but then my mom called me and told me about how she’s disappointed that she had a daughter like me and she wishes she had a son instead, and then my father stole some money from me last month, that was bad. And just a couple hours ago, I found out that my best friend died in a car accident.” Jin’s eyes widen as you pour out your feelings. He’s mostly surprised with the trust you have in him, as if you already know what kind of person he is and enough about him to tell him all of these private things.

“I’m sorry. On a scale of one to ten, one being the best and ten being the worst, how do you feel right now, emotionally?” Your eyes glistening with tears as you try not to cry.

“Yep. I always carry it, it’s like my good luck charm.” He winks at you as you laugh, the direness of the moment wearing off as you speak to Jin.

“I wish I had something like that. So, didn’t you say you were a matchmaker?” You try changing the subject, now focusing more on the incredibly handsome man in front of you.

“Yes, I am. I normally help clients get the person of their desires, confess, or sometimes, even mend struggling relationships.”

“That sounds like a bunch of jobs smushed together.” You tap your chin as you fall deep in thought.

“It’s the 70’s, so they have one person do all the doctor’s work.” Seokjin gives you another charming smile.

“Haha, you might be right about the doctor’s wor--wait did you say 70’s?” You ask, making sure you weren’t tripping on acid.

“Yes. Is there something wrong, Miss?” He asks, his tongue running along his plump lips.

Meanwhile, Jin splashes water onto his face, trying to make sense of the situation. 2019. She said 2019. There’s no way that could be true unless--last night was not a dream. Yoongi actually did magic and cast a spell on him that made him come to the future. Jin was still unsure but the room he is standing in is proof enough, that he traveled in time. He now has to break it to you, tell you the reason he is actually here. You might run away like the others, but it’s his job to be honest with his clients. It may be one of the hardest things about being a matchmaker. His job is very much like a doctor’s, as he can’t promise good results 100% of the time, but he can make assumptions on the “diagnosis” and process reasons for failure.

“You aren’t from around here, are you?” Your words astonish Jin, as he walks back into the room and closes the door behind him.

“What do you know?” You fold your arms and lean back into the wall, your feet a couple inches off the ground.

“H-h-how…?” The only thing he could think of was: witchcraft. Except you whip out your phone and prove him wrong.

“A typewriter.” He gasps.

“A digital typewriter.” You gently take the phone out of his hands, laughing at his adorable demeanor as he recites the word “digital” like an incantation.

“Since you know what’s going on, I need to ask: when can I go back?” You look at him with confusion.

“What do you mean? I just figured you were cosplaying.” Your words astonish him, since he had never heard of the term.

“No! I am from 1972, and I work here, the King of Love? Ever heard of him? It’s me. I’m Kim Seokjin.” He tries explaining it but you simply wave him off.

“I don’t believe you’re from the 70’s.” You simply state, shutting him down completely.

“What can I do to make you believe me?” He asks.

“Vocab.” You snicker, knowing the man is sure to fail now.

“Look, bro, I needed a therapy sesh. Not some weird time travel shit. Now can we please--”

“Young lady, that is no way to speak!” His sudden command silences you, as you stare him down, a blush settling on your cheeks.

“Y-yes sir.” You feel strangely aroused, as Seokjin circles around you, making you feel slightly inferior to him.

“Good girl.” He smirks as your gaze falls down to his shoes, and you admire how neat it looks. Wow, it almost looks like an original pair. But you can’t get too distracted. “Maybe if you’re good for me, I’ll give you a reward?” You nod slightly as he scans your body, mentally undressing you with his eyes. He steps forward, and before you know it, his lips are on yours, pink, plush, velvety lips pressing against your skin. You’re burning up, and he’s doing this to you.

“Seokjin, please.” You whine as his fingers make their way down your jeans, unbuttoning them and sliding them down your slit through your panties.

“Please what?” He teases, repeating the gesture a couple times until you’re grinding against his hand, waiting for something to happen as you rutted against him lewdly.

“Please sir. Please make me cum with your fingers.” You mewl as he kisses you roughly, and his fingers rub your clit until you reach your climax. “F-fuck.” You moan, gasping as he helped you get closer.

“Cum all over my fingers, princess. Maybe then I might reward you.” The juices gush out of your hole and onto his hand as you have your climax. Jin looks at you, satisfied. You recover after kissing him for a couple minutes, and then your hands travel down to his bulge, and you can feel his erection poking you.

“May I?” You ask, under half-lidded eyes.

“You may.” He allows you to unzip his pants and pull down his boxers to reveal the hairless dick. It’s pink, coated with precum, and just as perfect as the rest of him. In your mouth, he’s even bigger than you expected, and he seems to grow. His fingers are knotted up in your hair as you deepthroat him. You start getting more adventurous as he gets closer. He thrusts into your mouth gently as you slam down on him, feeling the heat coursing through your body, blood rushing to your head as you fuck him with all your might. “I’m close.” He lets out a heavenly gasp, before cumming into your mouth. You happily drink up the cum like juice, tasting the sweet semen on your lips before sitting back onto the bed.

“You taste really good. Sir, there’s one last thing I want to do.”

“Bold of you to assume that I’ll let you take control when you please.” Seokjin’s harsh tone sends butterflies to your core, making your womanhood even more drenched than it was before.

“Take me, Sir. Take me to Hong Kong. I want you to fuck me. Fuck me hard.” You spit out the words, as Seokjin’s eyes narrow with lust. He’s looking at you like a predator stalks prey, and then he snaps. He rips the clothes off you, and then removes his own shirt. After becoming fully naked, he kisses you gently and makes sure you’re adjusted to his size before moving.

“You asked for this, remember slut?” You moan underneath him as he bites your nipples and sucks them tenderly, his face buried in your chest.

“Fuck, sir, I think I’m going to cum!” You moan as he increases his pace, until the two of you reach your climax.

“That was good. Now, turn around.” He doesn’t give you enough time to recover before pushing you down and turning you around so that your backside was facing him. He takes a deep breath and admires your flawless back before spreading your legs and pushing himself in. He was fucking th same hole, except it felt different this time, you were tighter, all of your muscles clenching as Seokjin fucked you from the back.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck that feels so good sir!” You moan uncontrollably, Seokjin roughly kissing your neck and leaving hickies as he thrusted.

“You’re so tight for me, such a good slut for me, so good.” Jin’s moans echo yours as your skin slaps together, the wet noises growing louder as you both got increasingly close to your climax.

“Sir, I’m close, fuck!” You’re nearly weeping tears of joy as Jin pounds into you mercilessly, your pussy stretched and wet, yet still tight for Jin.

“Ah, Y/N!” He moans as he cums, and you gasp when you notice there is no condom.

“Jin, Jin, Jin!” You call his name three times as he continues thrusting into you, making you pant and moan like a bitch in heat.

“Fuck, gonna make you cum again, cum on my cock.” Jin’s words make you gasp and all you can do is moan for mercy as he gives it to you the way you like.

“Condom….no….Jin!” You moan, finally giving into your inner lust demon. He cums again, and as soon as he pulls out, cum shoots out of you onto the floor, and you know it’s not yours. It’s his. Jin’s cum. He came inside you. Twice.

“That was fun.” He kisses your cheeks and wipes your tears away. “Such a good girl for me. Now, why are you crying?”

“I’m on birth control, but the condom...what if I get pregnant?” You ask. Jin’s eyes widen in realization.

“Then I’ll stay. I’ll stay and raise a family with you.” He rests his forehead against yours as you pant heavily, trying to calm down.

“You mean it?” You ask.

“Yeah,” He smiles sadly when he sees the familiar blue glow in the hallway. “It looks like I have to leave now.” He looks at you with a frown as you grip his arm tightly.

“Please don’t go. Stay, Stay in 2019, with me.” You beg. He purses his lips, considering it. He was already falling for this girl, despite having known her for only 2 and a half hours.

“I wish I could,” He pushes your hand off him, gently. “But I can’t.” Your face falls as he leaves you, after putting his clothes back on.

┈♔◦☓◦☙◦♔◦☙◦☓◦♔┈

It had been about two weeks since Seokjin left the future, and work was as dull as ever. After his experience with you, he couldn’t stop thinking about the future. How you could’ve possibly been pregnant after he released his seed in you twice.Yoongi and Namjoon hated seeing him like this, Taehyung even tried cheering him up with pink cupcakes but the only thing he could think of was his princess.

“He’s miserable.” Namjoon sighs.

“I wish we could help him.” Taehyung frowns.

“Maybe we can…” Yoongi wiggles his fingers and lets out a giggle.

Ten minutes later, Seokjin hears a knock on the door.

“Come in.” Even the enthusiasm is gone from his voice.

“Did anyone call for a therapist?” The shock on Jin’s face when he sees you is laughable.

“Y/N!” He runs to you, pressing endless kisses to your face. “I missed you so much, princess.”

“I missed you too, Jinnie.” Your nickname for him makes him smile.

“It’s been too long.” He slowly moves down, kissing every inch of your body. He looks up at you for permission before removing your skirt. He looks at your lace panties and pervertedly licks your inner thigh.

“Ahhh, don’t judge.”

“I’m not, just admiring how beautiful you are.” He kisses your clit, removing your panties before moving his juicy lips to your womanhood. His tongue darts inside you skillfully, making you arch your back on his desk and moan as he eats you out.

“Ahhhh, Seokjin.” You close your eyes as the slurping noise resounds, bouncing off the walls and letting everyone in the building know how well Seokjin fucks you.

“Cum on my tongue baby.” He demands. Your body shudders and you let out another moan as you have an orgasm. Jin licks you until you’re clean again, and then he stands back up to kiss you.

“This time, I’ll be the one who stays.” You say, before yanking his tie off.

_______________________________________________________

A/N: Male Version here

#jin x reader #bts #bts jin #jin smut #au #fluff #angst #bts smut

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rezilient-m3 · 2 years ago

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Aug 2

Been a long time. I didn't want to update till I had something to update about, but I'm sitting here on night shift, tired asf. Lol.

S is the guy I was complaining about in the previous post. It's still weird. I get so upset, or have been, but when he comes back, I'm back "in like" with him. Lol. Geez. We go weeks sometimes without seeing each other, but speak more often. His bday was on the 23rd of July. Days before that I msged him and he didn't open it, I thought whatever, he must be busy. Then seen him at the casino that night. I seen him see me, then act like he didn't and walked thee other way. I was upset about that (today I realized I might have over reacted lol). But I didn't talk to him there. I did my own thing. Weird thing about that was, he never opened that msg (it was on snap). I just feel he must have felt stupid a out it and didn't know how to handle it. 3 days go by and it's Friday, day before his bday. I replied with "Do I know you?" But he laughed it off, and so did I. I said hbday. I didn't see him his bday cuz he went golfing with his sisters, then worked at 5 to 1am. Next day is when I start my shifts (Sun-Thurs, I'll come back to this). So, before I was done at 2pm, I tell him I'm going to bring him a coffee. I went buy a cupcake and a candle to surprise him cuz he never got a cake. It was cute. He was tickled. I almost chickened out cuz it felt lame lol. Anyways, the Frday night, when his bday was at midnight, he mentioned he wanted 35 kisses. So, before I left him, he asked where his kisses were. I kissed him on both cheeks then the lips. That was our first kiss.

We hung out once, again since, but still act like we don't know what we're doing lol. It's so dumb. We're on opposite schedules though, so it makes it difficult. Plus, I know we both want to ask to hang out, but we never do. Lol. So, I'm just being patient. Not really giving other men the time of day. Being loyal when I'm not even in a relationship yet lol. But he's cute. And really genuine, I'm pretty sure.

Anyways, about work. I went to a career fair May 5th, right after graduating. (Grad day was great!) Gave my resume that day. Got an interview May 17th. Offered the job June 7th, and officially started July 5th. That whole ass process took me two months. That was stressful. Anyways, I work Sun to Thurs, on rotations (6am-2pm, 2-10, and 10-6am). This week are nights. It's not bad. I'm in an emergency home that houses 15 kids in care. 3 groups of siblings and two singles, all ages from 1-11. Think it's meant for 0-12. I just do whatever I'm told. Mostly it's just babysitting and cleaning.

I feel like this isn't my calling tho. I've mentioned that I am meant for something big. Something to make a difference in this lifetime. So, I applied for social work to a university in the city. I got accepted, and I registered for my classes, but haven't heard about the funding yet. (My dad is an important man in our reserve and said that he'd talk to the chief and tell them to fund me. Talk about nepotism. Sorry, kinda.)

The big thing I thought about was, maybe it's working with families. In the beginning of my educational career, I thought of working with kids to try redirect them from a life of adversity might get them. Give them advice and be that positive influence. That's what I wanted, but I don't feel like I can do that here. So, I went back to the thought of helping mothers and fathers, or any care givers, to try bring back that "it takes a village" mentality.

I don't know if people have been keeping up with my story, but I have mentioned my personal story about this. In my counseling sessions I talked to my therapist about how it was for me being a young 19 year old mom, out on her own (with my pos bf at the time). I talked about how guilty I felt about not doing the things I should have been doing for my 1st son, who was just a baby. Then, for not raising my girls when they were with their dad. Then she told me about how long ago, in our culture, everyone had a village. Every child was taken care of by a community. We all know that by history. But it's so beautiful to read about. And she said that even though it was my choices that have led to those things happening, that I shouldn't take all of the blame for it. Meaning, I did not have a village. I didn't have anyone to guide me, or lean on, or to just be there when I was struggling. So, I shouldn't blame myself for all of it. And it only mattered to what I was accomplishing now. I have good relationships with my kids, I am sober and I am doing my best to give them a good life. Proud.

Now, as for this village concept, people everywhere should have this. Too many people are left to their own device's, trying to navigate through their addictions, while not learning the proper ways to raise these children. Which might land these kids in homes like these. Everyone needs to feel loved, unjudged, belonged, and accepted. Why can't we have that kind of community everywhere? I want to try. Seems like hard work, but if I at least reach as much people as I can and change this for them, then I'd be happy. So, I'm going to get that degree.!

Idk what else... Alex went to BC with our son. They were gone for over 2 weeks. They got home 2 days ago. We're still ok now. I think. I didn't do anything with my lawyer regarding custody or taking half his possessions lol. Still contemplating.

As for James and the girls' court. That's on Sept 9th. I need 5k to give to the same lawyer to help me to change the order, but I don't have that kind of money, and running out of time to get it. Makes me nervous and stresses me out. Cuz if he walks away from those charges, he can bring a cop to our house and take the girls. Cuz last court order is still the same from the last time we've been in court, and says I only have them for every second weekend, and he is primary caregiver with the decision making. Rank. I hate that. And need to figure this out soon.

There's my current events in a nut shell. I wish it were more interesting for y'all lol. But I'm done. And tired.

#allofme #thisisme #goingplaces #prayforus

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ladyautie · 7 years ago

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Okay, so I finally, finally, finished to watch Atypical and it was not a pleasure. Anyway, I’m going to start with its qualities, because, well, it’s going to be shorter than starting with its flaws.

1) They are accurate about autism. Sometimes. Not often.

There are a few moments I legitimately related with Sam, the main character, like when he’s trying to fill his dating profile and doesn’t exactly know how to do so or when he’s laughing by himself or the short moment when he said he remembered that his girlfriend’s father’s name is Mario because of Super Mario (I’m awful with names and I’m using this kind of tips to remember them).

2) The sister is mostly endearing. Mostly, yeah. Her character and backstory are really lacking of originality, but I still found myself getting attached to her and some of her scenes with Sam (like when she tells him that if he doesn’t have anyone to eat with, she’s here and he can come with her. That’s sweet).

The actress is pretty good for what I think is her first gig. She’s doing with what the script is giving to her and she’s okay. The character is okay. Mostly, I insist. I’ll get back to it later.

3) Paige. PAIGE. Sam’s love interest. You know that this tv show has an issue when the supposed Neurotypical character makes a better autistic character than the one we have officially. The show could have been AMAZING if it has been centered on her and if she were officially autistic.

She’s the type of “extrovert autistic person” we don’t get to see AT ALL in media (the only one I can think of is Mary from “All about Steve” and she’s not even officially autistic either).

She’s lively, she’s stimming (jumping up and down, mostly), she has troubles with boundaries, but can learn from her mistakes, she’s very talkative and doesn’t always know when she’s talking too much or she’s bothering people, but she can understand social cues here and there.

She’s highly sensitive and you can even argue that she has a meltdown onscreen (after Sam has broken up with her).

Paige is LIFE. With a few changes here and there and better writers, Paige could be an amazing autistic heroine. But no, we have Sam instead. Anyway, let’s move on to the flaws.

1) The ableism. So, so much ableism. I can’t even tell you everything because there’s too much. From the language policing (”No, no, we’re not saying “autistic”, we’re saying “person with autism”, we have to put the person first”), to the infantilization (the mother treats her 18 years old son like a six years old kid, it’s awful to witness), it’s a mess.

You don’t have one episode without someone saying how hard it is to live with an autistic person, how much they have to sacrifice, how much it has changed their lives.

The parents are viewed as heros and martyrs at the same time and I felt really awful hearing them talking about their son, and what they missed, and how it affected their relationship and so on.

When you make a show about a topic so sensitive, you can’t just spit on the people that are directly concerned by it. You can’t just tell us like that that we’re a burden to you. It’s unfair. It’s awful. Do you really think that none of us will watch this show ? Do you ?

This tv show caters way too much to his neurotypical audience, so much that, as an autistic person, I feel excluded. I can’t laugh because they’re laughing about us.

I can’t relate because they never bothered to talk with autistic people and they’re just doing what they feel is accurate about autism. I can’t feel happy watching this because the show is literally telling me that I’m making life harder for everyone else.

2) The characters. Dear god, the characters. It’s a mess. I’m supposed to feel empathy for a mother that is downright abusive (she’s reading her daughter’s texts, she doesn’t let her close her door when she has a boy with her, she’s almost refusing to her son to buy his own clothes and so on and so on.

I’m supposed to like a mother that is selfish, that wants to be seen as a tragical figure because she “sacrificed everything” for her autistic son.

I’m supposed to like her, even though she’s accusing everyone of her own mistakes. She’s one of the worst characters I’ve ever seen in a sitcom and I watched the A word with its awful mother. The one from Atypical is far worse.

The father is not better. He’s just a cliché. And he likes to complain too, and he’s ableist, and he’s mimicking his son’s behavior to not say the r-word (which isn’t better).

By the end, I still kinda let myself get attached to him a bit, just a little bit, because he has to put up with being with his wife and that’s the worst thing I can imagine for someone else.

The sister is mostly good, but she’s also a bully sometimes. And she has an entire scene where she literally says that, when she was little, she thought the word “NT”, that Sam and her mother used, meant “empty”.

And that it made sense to her because Sam was taking up so much space that everyone else around him was empty. This is even worse in french because they decided that it sounded like “haunted” and that being around Sam made people feel like they were “haunted”.

I... I’ve never seen a scene so ableist, especially in a recent tv show like that. I really, really felt hurt by what she said. And this is from a show that is supposed to highlight autism ? To make it seem “normal” ? Because they sure as hell are pathologizing it during the show.

As Sam, he’s just a textbook of symptoms. No, even worse, the way they’ve written him, he feels like a creepy asshole.

He’s always saying awful stuff to everyone, including telling to his girlfriend in front of her whole family that he doesn’t love her and leaving her like it, he’s violent (he pulled a girl’s ponytail because it gets in his face.

Dude, you can just... move. Sit down on another place. That’s terrible), he’s always talking about sex (sometimes, I felt like I was watching American Pie, seriously...) and so on.

He’s not a good character. And he’s not a good autistic representation. At all.

As for the psychiatrist, she’s awful at her job. Seriously, she doesn’t even notice that her patient, not subtle at all, is in love with her and then, she’s yelling at him and blaming him when he’s confessing to her. Like... wow.

3) The humor. It’s not funny. Not funny at all. I didn’t expect to laugh out loud like I did while watching Speechless, but wow. They really failed on this point. The delivery is awful, the humor is either childish (like “Ha ha, he said boobs”) or downright sexist/racist.

Between the hooker that is flashing Sam like it’s an American Pie movie and Sam’s best friend, who is Indian, talking about a woman who called him “brown sugar” while they were having sex, I’m like.. wow.

And I didn’t even mention the guy that Casey met to have her interview for her future college. He’s black and, obviously, he feels the need to mention that immediately by saying “I’m black, so they put me on the cover of their presentation”.

The delivery is so forced, it really feels “whitey”. I’m not going to talk much more about it, because it’s not my place as a white woman, but I really felt uneased.

Even in the autism subject, they missed so much opportunities. Sam experiencing echolalia and repeating a word in its head again and again and again until he can’t handle it and has to shout it ? It could be hilarious.

Make the word a very random thing and the situation during which he’s shouting it even more random. I don’t know, like “Falcon” and he’s shouting it in the middle of the night or something, waking up everyone.

But no. The word has to be “twat” and he has to yell it at a random girl. It’s... It’s not funny. At best, it’s childish, at worst, it’s offensive. And it’s always like that. They’re always laughing at us and they aren’t even doing it properly.

This tv show is a mess. Watching it was painful, so much that I literally had a nosebleed just after finishing it. I don’t have the spoons to make this review longer, but... don’t watch it. It’s not worth it. Not even as a “bad tv show” that you think you could mock. It’s not funny that way either. It’s just... bad.

#actuallyautistic #actually autistic #Atypical #autism #ableism #neurotypicals #autistic character #autistic headcanon #long post

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