#The Zambonis

[cymk8]

they are practicing their lifts don't tell coach jaheira

more of this self-indulgent ice skating au

[usnatarchives]

Zamboni, it's cold! 🧊🥶❄️🏒

Did you know the National Archives Catalog holds the coolest records—including the Zamboni patent? Frank Zamboni’s invention hit the ice in 1949, revolutionizing rink maintenance and keeping hockey and skating fans gliding smoothly.

[gurbs-blurbs]

We made pants to go with my jacket

I have not tried them on yet but when I do I will do a photo shoot.

Lyrics are from

By @narcissistcookbook

Also for a funny haha both the narcissist cookbook and bug hunter are going on tour and I found a haha funni

Yes I bought it and yes I am going to drive this bad boy around.

Go listen it's good

In honor of that I made this shirt

Though it might be funny

[annieqattheperipheral]

nhl players: i permit the nhl to use an image of my likeness in promotional materials

the nhl:

"hockey players have no personality" nhl: i beg your fucking pardon???????

[catfindr]

[snoopylovessoup]

[punkitt-is-here]

first from da new batch of comms.....discord on da zamboni

[samgirard]

└ kochetkov manning the door | round one, game one: car vs. nyi | 4.20.24 + bonus: sorokin stuck behind the glass

[edgecallskating]

"Hey Shoma, could you do a little something after the exit on the quad flip? Nothing much, just some character in the choreo?" Shoma:

[mamawasatesttube]

i just think that after all the shit he's given both clark and kon, martha kent should be allowed to run bruce wayne down with her tractor or something. (l'oreal voice) john deere. because she's worth it

[wikipediapictures]

Ice resurfacer

[spineless-lobster]

Charmes skating au where hermes is a professional figure skater and charon is a zamboni driver send post

[weirdmarioenemies]

Name: Zomboni

Debut: Plants vs. Zombies

Plants vs. Zombies is such a silly game. Silly is baked into its very code. And I love that! You know me! I live under rotting wood, eating silly and breaking it down into nutrient-rich soil! But I think Zomboni has the honor of being the silliest thing in this already-silly game!

There is no way Zomboni would exist if it weren't for the wordplay. So thank goodness for the wordplay! A zombie, on a Zamboni. Though, we are informed that it is actually "more closely related to a space ogre than a Zombie". What impeccable word choice! So it's not even actually a space ogre. Just some weird guy creature. Awesome

Zomboni drives an ice resurfacing machine, and I have no idea what the general public's knowledge level of these things is. Does the average person know the exist? I knew, but I played and hated playing hockey as a child so I got to watch the ice being resurfaced, which was the best part. Some guy who may or may not be tangentially related to space ogres will drive this machine around the ice rink, cutting down the surface and laying down fresh ice to make a nice and smooth surface, I think. Now, I may be using the generic term for this product, but commonly, there is one brand name that is used commonly, like Band-Aid or Q-Tip or Velcro, and for that we can thank...

Name: Frank J. Zamboni

Debut: Utah

Frank J. Zamboni! Hooray! What do you have to say, Frank?

Wow. So true, Frank. I'm sure this message is reaching its intended audience in this post. Anyway, ol' Ice Tank Frank made such an iconic machine that it is THE ice resurfacing machine in the public consciousness, and there is even a trademark for its iconic shape! That seems unnecessary but ok. Now, when the ghost of the Zamberino was scrying the mortal realm for references to his work in media, he came across parody in a funny video game, and OBVIOUSLY something had to be done about that!

And from then on, Zomboni's description was updated to reflect that it is NOT to be confused with a Zamboni® brand ice resurfacing machine, you silly billy, why would you think that? And they also plugged the Zamboni website in-game, so that the audience of, I must emphasize, a silly video game, would be more likely to buy an entire ice resurfacing machine, or at least its related merchandise. I really would think this would all be fine under parody law, but maybe it has to do with the shape trademark. Whatever. To the Zamboni company's credit, they have some incredible merchandise.

What a powerful item. With this, the course of a baby's life can be changed forever...

Zomboni with an O, I mean with two Os, approaches while creating a trail of freshly laid ice that cannot be planted on. The brand-ambiguous ice resurfacing machine is quite tough, but instant-kill plants are effective, as are Spikeweeds and Spikerocks, which will instantly pop its tires!

Zomboni is a considerable threat, instantly flattening any plant it reaches before its destruction, though the player should be pretty well-equipped to combat it, and the ice is laid on the right side of the screen, rather than the precious left side. Pretty manageable! But Zomboni is only the beginning, and as much delight and intrigue as I have gleaned from Zomboni's existence, it's what FOLLOWS Zomboni that is, in fact, my favorite zombie(s) in the game.

If Zomboni is allowed to create an ice trail, it will be used by Zombie Bobsled Team! Yeah, Frank got a whole "name/debut" section and these guys just get a bolded name in a sentence. You never know what I'm gonna do next! Hee hee!

Zombie Bobsled Team is exactly what it sounds like! A team of zombies, in a bobsled! So that's four zombies, with a defensive vehicle that has to be destroyed before they can be harmed! Zomboni was already over-the-top silly, and then Zombie Bobsled Team goes even higher over that top. And it's a Big Top, where they keep all the clowns. There is not much else I can say about Zombie Bobsled Team, but it really speaks for itself!

For some reason there exists official art of "Mullet Zombie", the Zomboni driver without his vehicle and hat. And for an even somer reason, they put it on the box art for the DS version! PvZ1 is simply very strange when it comes to official key art. Messed up.

[gurbs-blurbs]

I ZAMBONIED

This was so fun! Thank you @thetimeofsome for taking the video and thank you @narcissistcookbook for letting me crash your show with my zamboni!

I regret supping up the zambos power it was to fast and as you can see I had to awkwardly do 3 point turns. Almost literally crashed multiple times! But still so much fun!!

You're cool as fuck Matt! I'll see you in Orlando!

[incorrect-hs-quotes]

EQUIUS: D -> Boar of STRENGTH and boar of POWER

EQUIUS: D -> HEAVY training every hour

EQUIUS: D -> Huge and fat my awesome pig

EQUIUS: D -> I make it large I make it big

KARKAT: SANG THIS SHIT EVERY TIME I WENT UP THE MOUNTAIN TO MAKE MY PIG DRINK FROM THE STREAM FOR MONTHS. IT WORKED *BUT* MY WHOLE BLOODLINE IS CURSED NOW SO LIKE. MAYBE NOT WORTH IT. 6 / 10