#THIS IS SO LONG EFF DUDE.....

[huldine]

I was originally going to put this in the tags, but then realized that I had about 3 pages worth of frustrated, pent-up emotions that were pouring out... and I might as well just add it to the post!

I feel so confused by the insanely pervasive headcanons that exist about Solas in fan spaces, and are repeated as if they're fact or canon in game-- whether to degrade his character or try to defend him!

I've played this game for almost a decade now and one thing that I always remembered and knew about Solas, was that he had an incredible amount of banter and conversation pertaining to ALL peoples-- whether dwarven, human, qunari, elven, etc. that talked about UNIVERSALS.

The Qunari baker who presses a single pinch of sugar in each loaf of bread as she starts her day? He speaks with such OPEN admiration of her, because he FAMOUSLY admires that resistance no matter who it comes from!! He admires and is interested in UNIVERSALS, despite his resentment and regrets about his own actions that reshaped the entire world.

He discusses faith with Cassandra, and admires the strength of her spirit and convictions-- even if he has disagreements with the Chantry itself, or the Andrastian faith and it's frequent attacks against dissent (especially towards elven communities).

He doesn't want to "bring back the old world" because he thinks that the ELVES are the best, or that he wants to kill every other race-- he wants to REVERSE the action that he made which fundamentally changed the world forever, and for the worse (in his eyes).

I truly believe that this (in my opinion) mischaracterization happens because of his race-locked romance, which gives this really strange habit of discourse claiming that "only lavellan opens his mind to the idea that modern people are actually people" despite him having a similar if not IDENTICAL conversation every other befriended Inquisitor! And you can believe that the conversation is condescending or offensive, but the fundamentals of it are the same for every race-- he grows to admire you as a representation of what the modern world (that he incidentally created) has wrought.

Solas is at his core a NUANCED individual, and that's exactly what makes his character so interesting and able to spark all of these discussions and discourses about his intentions, beliefs, and motivations. It is such a huge disservice to morph him into this simplistic individual that hates other people when he is genuinely a curious person, who sees connections of the universals between all people.

P.S (i ran out of space in the tags again...): If he actually hated other races or more specifically in this example QUNARI then we would not hate the Qun as much as he does. It is BECAUSE he dislikes the Qun because of it's (in his belief) repressive and controlling nature over the individuality of the soul, that we can understand that he 1) DOES see qunari (as a race) as people that have the same universals as himself and 2) ADMIRES the resistance that he can recognize within his own nature shared among people such as the Baker.

^^^ and this is NOT targeted against people that critique his interactions with qunari or beliefs about the Qun, because trust me as an arab I understand the parallels between this and a lot of anti-Islam rhetoric which parades right-wing and racist rhetoric beneath claims of "compassion."

This is specifically for people who reduce his character down to a simplistic headcanon that fits into a neat little box of "he just likes elves da most," ignoring the most fundamental aspects of his world view which are again based in UNIVERSALS, his own sense of morality and ethics, and most especially RESISTANCE against injustice.

Once again genuinely confused by people who claim Solas is obsessed with empire and elven glory and restoring Arlathan the way it was??

[eff-exor]

when she knows i’ve had a weird day, and she gets on all fours, presenting her pretty holes to me. ever so sweetly telling me “it’s okay, let me help, you can fuck me if you want to,” so of course, starting in doggy, i thrust into her and watch how well she fucks herself back on me. it’s not long before my mind is filled with nothing but the sounds escaping the both of us, and the sound of her ass hitting against my hips. i find my hands gripping at her, beginning to lose myself completely. “it’s okay” her voice replays in my head. she knows how i get when i’m like this. i try to keep myself in control, sane enough to know when to stop. but on days like this, watching her cunt stretch around me, how could i?? she is perfect. my hands run over her back, pushing her shoulders down, face buried into the pillow. her soft moans now muffled, but somehow louder than before. she tries to keep up with my pace but it’s hard when i’m gripping onto the scruff of her neck so tight and rutting into her deeper and harder, as if it’s the last thing i’m ever going to do. her body collapses under me and i lean back slightly, watching her now limp body bounce with each movement, her fucked out gasps and whining are the only sign that she’s still conscious. the love i feel for her suddenly takes over my body, my thrusts become slow but deep, my hands no longer groping, but running over every bit of skin they can. telling her how good she is for me, how much i appreciate and care for her. leaning forward to place kisses across her shoulders and spine. she is my peace, and she knows exactly how to make me feel better. she is perfect

[mintytealfox]

NORTON'S 2025 LETTER

"Investigation Field Notes 1" 👀🙏🙏🙏

My THOUGHTS:

So its sounding like Alice showed up to look into the mining industry and the corruption there instead of looking into the accident itself! So a good amount of time could have passed since the accident 👀and judging how Norton had '1 Para' on him, sounds like he was traveling and traveling FAR.

This has me wondering what were all the places he went to before returning to find Benny rotting away in an alley. And what drew him to those places 👀🙏 Mans has his drive to grind for that money so why go all the way out there? the pay off must have been worth it to do all that travel. Then what brought him back to Benny? It isn't likely anyone contacted him to say that 'Benny is hella dead'. Maybe he was returning to check on him only to find him laid out and abandoned in such a horrible state. Which then makes me think that he wants to despise Benny so bad but he can't help himself, he cares and he can't help but care ;; He tries so hard to be dead inside to match how he looks on the outside but he just caaannnn'ttttt ;; BUT I wonder what would have happened if he returned and Benny was still alive? Cause again, there was no way anyone was like 'this dude dead come get him' he was returning to see an alive Benny. What was his plan? Was he actually returning to potentially get Benny out of there to somewhere better? Did he find something on his travels that made him go back to Benny??

(I still think Benny was manipulating Norton to do all the work and Norton peaced out of there after everything was said and done. But the fact that he returns to Benny after all that....gosh)

Cause by the sounds of it Norton would bring the freshest bread to Benny and not bother getting any for himself. He would save up to give Benny the best. That is NOT the actions of someone only there to use and take. He would have had some fresh bread for himself as well, but he didn't, he would eat nasty bread always and then only Benny got the good stuff ;; LIKE?? Makes me think that maybe Benny was getting dementia or something and thinking that Norton was just using him and yelling and screaming about Norton being a thief but maybe Norton was legit trying to do it for the both of them and not just himself 🙃 ITs difficult dealing with elderly who are loosing their minds.... Getting berated and accused of stuff simply because they are throwing a tantrum in the moment just 180 flip flops in mood and actions ;; So Norton not visiting as often when Benny started to get too much, makes perfect sense to me. Life is hard enough without the person you view as family loosing themselves and attacking you now cause their brain is just gone ;; and you just want to remember them for who they were. And maybe he got so desperate to get them both out of there that he locked the eff in so he could get Benny to a doctor instead of this nasty moldy place they are currently in. But Benny and his twisting thought process, due to illness, thinking that Norton was just doing all this for himself and going to abandon him -sigh-

ITs just the fact that Norton returns after his travels makes me think he found something for Benny and was coming back for him orz but was obviously too late

and just became another nail in his own metaphorical coffin that leads him to agree to anything for money so he doesn't end up like a dead rat in the street. Just the massive disrespect to human life to have Benny just left out there for so long just to decompose in the alley like that is just beyond horrible.

---- Extra Thoughts: Norton bringing those Hades vibes back again ;; Tied to death and paying Benny's way into the after life ;;

I also think its interesting that the other miners are talking about Norton like he is some mythical creature that they think they have spotted pff

[missuswalker]

Kyle dating hc's pleaaaaase 🧎🏼‍♀️🧎🏼‍♀️🧎🏼‍♀️

meow meow meow 🤭🤭

relationship headcannons || kyle broflovski x fem reader

✮ summary: kyle as your boyfreind ✮ warnings: i was gonna do what i did for the clyde one but changed my mind, so nsfw content, reminder that characters are aged up (i'm too much of a kyle girl to pass up the oppurtunity)

sfw

before ya'll started dating he did your homework for you as a rizz tactic

he thought it would make you want him

turns out you wanted him even before he started doing your homework, so he starts making you do it yourself

but kyle would do anything for you, so if you ask him with that pretty face of yours, he'll do it anyways

ya'll had a long "are we dating are we not phase"

he's been screwed over so many times that he wanted to make sure you were the one

you definitely were

after much convincing from stan and a couple hundred "no balls, you wont"s from cartman, kyle finally asks to be his gee-eff (girlfriend)

over text in your instagram dms

LOOK, HE WAS TOO NERVOUS TO DO IT IN PERSON

he did it very romantically though

loooooooong paragraph about how much he likes you and wants you to be all his

ends it with "And I know you piss me off sometimes, but I think I could really make us work."

as SOON as you say yes

"Come over. You have my address."

anyways, moving on, he acts like he thinks pet names are cringe, but he can't help but call you that goody goody shit like "angel"

do you hear purring? sorry

anyways, he spoils you to death, like what was in my love language hcs

"oh wow that's so cute" "what color do you want it in" "kyle 😟"

loooves when you wear his boxer shorts around his house, he thinks he's THE man when you do

his mom likes to talk to him about embarrassing things in front of you to mess with him

"hi boobala, your spiderman underwear is fresh out of the dryer 🥰" "ma, that's ikes, get out 😡😡😡😨😰"

when you guys cuddle, he puts his hand up your shirt and rubs your back

he has cold ass hands though

kisses the top of your head all the time

he's like 6'2 so if you're shorter than him he's all like "aww elf 😻😻" when in reality he's just tall

nsfw

WOOF WOOF WOOF AWOOOOO

damn

first time he was suuuuuper sweet and gentle

after that he puts his temper into it

its like theres an earth quake from the bed rocking

ike ain't a snitch though 🤐

he is rough, hoowee

grunts, huffs, groans

all the good shit

probably says some good girl shit at some point

if he's actually upset, he rather you take control

lets you do whatever you want and whimpers

he whines yall

but if cartman pissed him off, its not the same

has you in doggy style and goes WILD

he don't care if you're screaming

yeah he does, when he's finished he STRESSES about sheila

"dude, you were fucking rabid, i'm so fucked 😰😰"

sheila side eyes him at breakfast but doesn't say anything

makes gerald give him the talk

gerald makes randy give him the talk

randy informs him of new positions

someone on wattpad said "jew in the streets, freak in the sheets"

[sluttywonwoo]

The Reaction of them walking in on you was so much fun 😂 Can I ask about how they would react if you walked in on them?

seungcheol: “notice how the door was closed? yeah, there was a reason for that.”

jeonghan: he walks around kind of naked anyway so neither of you are surprised

joshua: “you don’t have to leave if you don’t want to, i don’t mind. no, i don’t mean it like that! unless…” 👀

jun: “you’re so lucky my dick wasn’t out, jesus christ.”

soonyoung: “you like what you see?” 😼

wonwoo: “oh hey.”

jihoon: he’d act all scandalized but lbr he doesn’t spend all of that time in the gym for people not to look

seokmin: reflexively throws whatever it is he’s holding at you and only apologizes once he realizes it’s you

mingyu: it could go one of two ways— 1) he gets all shy and covers himself up or, 2) he’s cocky about it and makes fun of you for getting flustered

minghao: he could not care less tbh. as a performer people see him in various states of undress all the time. sure, it matters more because it’s you but as long as it doesn’t make things weird between you he wouldn’t mind all that much

seungkwan: oh you’re getting cursed the eff out even though it was an accident

vernon: high-pitched whining at you to get out (add it to the ‘vernon never beating the maknae allegations’ compilation videos)

chan: he’s a confident dude. he’d probably flex at you to make you laugh and show off simultaneously… two birds one stone type beat

[nifreti-ii]

Reactions to Day 3 !!!SPOILERS!!!

SPOILERS! EFF OFF IF YOU HADN'T PLAYED YET!!!!

Little blurbs from day 3

Mmm bbg, but bbg girl is more frustrated than usual

Nuh uh bean, dont care if its meant to be, that rabbit is being put down. It’s better to just put something out of its misery rather than letting it suffer (bombastic side eye)

THE ANIMATION JUMPSCARE :0 I was not expecting that nice touch :3

OH SHIT! Dont give a fuck about how sweet and caring this boy is, only known him 3 days. The second he yells at me I am in complete panic mode and running ( ✨trauma ✨but like no, the way I genuinely got scared fam) tbh my chest is still tight :<

Jelly fish huh… I bet it’s that immortal jellyfish. He’s not immortal (I assume) but long-lived so I can see it.

HA his disguise is so cute! He looks all bundled up omg. SO CUTE AAAAA THE LIL GLASSES AAAAAAAAAAAA. 

THE BLEP! THE BLEEEEP!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH-

OOOOH THE WAY I CLAPPED YESSSSSSSS!!! I wanna see you again sweetie omg! So CUTTTTE LAJKHWGDKLJAWHGDJKAGHW!

VIDA? They kind of look like alma? OH MYCHEAL MY HEART AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA, he totally got jealous didn't he?

Second run

Oh boy he really is not happy, he’s being eaten up by his thoughts, just wanted to be a silly sleeve flapper :<

OH cutie! So cute when he laughs and smile UGH MY HEART!JKLHG (he’d be the cutest inmate) 

Cool weird word in his language ( I wanna know his real name) and cute lil ticklish mushroom boi (he’ll die of giggle) 

Cant knitt BUT I CAN CROCHET : D (What’s in the box, Mycheal.)

Jesus dude! Don't give me a love confession without the word love in it omg MY FACE!!.

Note, to effectively flirt with mycheal, refer to his appearance positively.  His language is cool and weird af, I like it. OMG HIS FACXE SO BLUE OMG A LIL BLUEBERRY AH!

(THEORY) oki, when we step into the mushrooms on the first day and pass out. Mycheal gives us a tea of some sort that gives us control of our body again. When he overdoses us on the brain effecting stuff, we get nausea the next. He gives us THE SAME tea from before and we feel better again almost immediately. AND THEN when we encounter the mushrooms again he gets MAD, yells at us mad. What if… The ring mushrooms are somehow associated with his species (we know through the blog that Mycheal HATES others of his species 0. 0) and maybe why he gets super territorial about them being in his portion of the forest. This green mushroom cutie intrigues me more and more.

[candywife333]

Red Riding Hood

"Scary" wolf hybrid Namjoon x red riding hood chubby reader

Inspired by Cupcakke's new song "Little Red Riding Hood"

Triggers: cursing,, period sex mentions

Debating on a part 2

Blood hell! It was already 7:00 in the evening and it had gotten so dark out, I had hardly kept track. I was supposed to go to grandmother's house to deliver a batch of double chocolate chip cookies that I had just made.

Period cramps were the worst, and the only way I could fight them was by eating so many chocolatey foods that I felt like throwing up. I usually have horrible pain like someone stabbing me with a sword fifty times in my gut as I squeeze out blood clots the size of blueberries😣. I know, my life is an entire travesty.

It's as thought my body was punishing me for not being pregnant😭. Whatever I guess, such is life. I ceased my philosophizing and grabbed a raggedy red hoodie , holes and loose strings all over, that had seen better days honestly. The main reason I planned to wear it is so that, just in case I leak, it is long enough to cover my butt. Therefore, it would almost be as though..........I never leaked.

Grabbing the basket of delectable baked goods, I started walking onto the cobblestone path to grandma's house. I was second guessing my decision to go to her house because it had gotten way darker than I was expecting it to get. And, my period cramps had started up again, slicing me up internally like a guillotine.

As I cringed in pain and felt the cold sweat trail down my temples, I still persisted in walking at a faster pace so I could make it to her house in at least half an hour. The old biddie lived out there in the middle of nowhere ready to be stabbed by a bloody serial killer. It is as though she saw all the horror movies and still decided to have a death wish. Swear on my mother, I loved that old lady. But sometimes she just acted so senile you could question her sanity.

I mean what business did she have living out here in the middle of nowhere, being a living, walking health liability? As I continued musing, I failed to notice the shadow lurking behind me in the growing darkness of the night. I was startled , almost dropping my basket when I heard a deep, rather seductive voice rumble out, " What are you doing here in the dark, pretty girl? Are you lost in the woods"?

Now, correct me if I am wrong. I usually don't judge people. But did this dude have a health condition? Or was he big-foot? Because he was the hairiest human being I had ever seen in my short life---and mind you, I know its a little TMI, but I grow hair on my butt and one day, to my great consternation, I even found a hair on my bellybutton😱. Yeah, we can freak out about that at a different date. So you see, I know what hairy is. But this man doesn't look hairy, he looks almost as though he is covered in fur. A 6 foot dude covered in fur. Worthy of the Guiness book of world records if you ask me. And he stank like five hundred period pads on a vacation in the Bahamas.

Chiding myself for being such a judgmental b****, I said in a confused manner, " Do you need anything Sir? Because I have a place to be, and no, I am in fact not lost. But if you push me a little further , in the rather sensitive state I am in right now, you might........find lost yourself..........if you catch my drift". He gasped , looking rather shocked, "Little lady, are you implying that you will make me disappear---that you will kill me"?

I continued walked at a faster pace away from him as I spelled out in a curt tone, " I can neither confirm nor Deny Mister".

He was really testing my patience right now. I am leaking like the bloody niagara falls and he's trying to interrogate me. Like what the eff did he want from me right now? When I had places to be. Is this how men flirt? Because he was doing a horrendous job at it. He was messing with the wrong b** right now. I am not in the mood for this tomfoolery.

He trailed after me at an equally hurried pace, "Are you not scared of me? Worried that I will kidnap you"? I groaned as I kept walking, huffing out, "If you had that many guts you would've just done it by now dude. Why make threats when you can just do it? Actions speak louder than words. And right now, your actions are telling me that you are a wimp".

He seemed rather affronted, eyebrows wiggling together in a menacing frown as he bit out in a menacing tone, " Did you just call me a coward, young lady? Do you even know who you are dealing with"?

What an irritating numbskull?!!Couldn't he see that I had places to bloody be?😡🤬

I turned to him one last time, taking a cursory glance at his hairy ass and hairy legs. This man did not keep shaving as a priority. "Look bruv, you are doing the most right now. Now, I am not one to mince my words--so I will tell you in the politest way possible right now, since as you can see---I was brought up with etiquette and manners".

I took in a deep breathe to calm myself as much as I could, "Your ass stank like a hundred buckets of sardines left out to dry on a hot summer's day. You talk too much and I am hemorrhaging into my butt crack, which is right now defying all laws of physics. I feel nauseous looking at you, as I am bleeding to death. The least you could do is leave me alone, so I can deliver these gosh darn abominable cookies that I should've just eaten and period pooped it out myself". I started sobbing and crying, so saddened by how much this fool was holding me up ....on my period....in the forkin' darkness.

He looked utterly shook at my monologue. Frozen in place as I continued moving away, weeping into the night, bleeding torrentially as I ran away . Mother fu*** couldn't even give a girl a lift to the place she was going to go. He failed at even being a proper kidnapper. I mean what was he even good for if he couldn't even be a good criminal??

______________Finally at grandma's house🍪_________

I finally got to this old b****'s house. Almost bursting a blood vessel in my forehead. Why the f did she have to live so far away? This is odd, her door was already open. Strange. She never did that. Very uncharacteristic of her. She was all about safety and keeping windows, doors locked --- as though that was going to save her ass from dying in the middle of nowhere.

Pondering upon the morbid nature of my thoughts, I walked in absent-mindedly through her cottage till I got to her living room. There she was, wrapped in a blanket sitting on the rocking chair. She looked rather thick, if you get what I mean. I don't remember her packing on this much weight, or being this tall. She was known for being frail. Something was up.

Maybe she decided that thick thighs save lives or something and started fattening herself up. Who knew the body positivity movement affected grannies too? "Grandma, what are you doing on that chair? Did you have dinner yet? And why is your door open"?

As I got closer and closer to the chair, whoever it was sitting on there, looked less and and less like a grandma, and more like wolf. I froze, confused. What the hell was that on the chair?

The thing on the chair started cackling as the blanket fell to the floor. I yelled in indignation, my patience for life finally cooked to smithereens "WTF ARE YOU DOING IN MY GRANDMA'S COTTAGE YOU HAIRY CREEP? DID YOU EAT HER"? The hairy man I had seen in the woods was dressed in my grandma's nightie , looking at me hungrily -- as though he were a starving waif who saw tiramisu for the first time in his life.

He drawled out in rather disgruntled, irritated voice, "Your grandma is on vacation in Bora Bora little lady. She left me to watch her house. Did you not receive the text last week from her"? I huffed out, annoyed at the blase tone he was using with me, "you freaking liar" as I checked my phone. As he had said, the old biddie had texted me last week about her vacation, and it had gone into my spam.

I straightened up, feeling a little bad for yelling at him. "Then why are you dressed up in her nightie dude? Are you into cross dressing or something"? He looked even more irritated than he did before, eyes shining with frustration as I continued, gesturing with my hands ,"I won't judge you for it. We are totally pro LGBTQ in this household you know".

He suddenly got up from his chair and snatched me up by my waist. He smelled way better than he did before, faintly of lavender as he laid me up on her bed. Wait, her bed? Whoa, Whoa. What the hell. This becoming 365 days way too quickly.

I squeaked out in confusion, "What the hell you doing man? I am on my period. You can not squeeze and manhandle me like that. I WILL LITERALLY SQUIRT ON YOU LIKE A KETCHUP BOTTLE"!! He paused for a second, looking like he was going to die of laughter. As he collected himself slowly, he warbled out, " Look, I am not trying to manhandle you. It's just that I am a straight man who is just in his werewolf form. And you are judging me when I am on my rut".

I bent my head, questioning him, "AND what's that supposed to mean? You get hairy and horny"? He nodded, as though it was all self explanatory. I seethed , metaphorical steam coming out of my ears, "Look dude--I see that you are babysitting my grannie's cottage and you are on your rut, but what does that have to do with you following me, wearing a nightie , and acting like an overall creep"?

His eye twitched as he bit out in an exasperated tone, " I fell into a pile of rotting salmon at my friend's fish farm and came to your grandma's cottage , that I had to check on anyway for the night, saw you ambling down the path and wanted to make sure you were safe in the dark, and then washed off all of the scent ---realizing her nightie was the only clean thing I could wear. That is why you are seeing me here".

I sniffed, astounded at his rather logical explanation, "Fine, then elaborate to me, why you called me pretty lady"? He scoffed, guffawing ,"You mean to tell me, that you are offended that I called you pretty lady? How am I supposed to know that you are on your period and are having a horrible mood swing. I ain't telepathic".

I stared at him, ready to fight him. Yes, he was supposed to know that i WAS ON MY BLOODY PERIOD, BECAUSE HOW COULD HE CALL HIMSELF A WOLF OTHERWISE ? "hOW COULD YOU NOT SNIFF THE BLOOD SEEPING OUT OF MY VAGINA, YOU FOOL"?!!!

He yelled out in panic, " Of course I can SMELL IT WOMAN!!! IT'S DELECTABLE AND YUMMY! BUT I'M TRYING TO AVOID SNIFFING IT FOR YOUR OWN SAFETY , SO I DON'T RUT YOU AND MAKE YOU MY MATE!!! STUPID GIRL, CAN'T YOU SEE THAT I'M ALMOST GOING TO SNAP"?!!!

I settled down, exhausted and almost yawning from this tirade, "You could just ask if you want to eff me you know? I wouldn't mind".

He stared at me in confusion, "Woman, you are unhinged and if I wasn't so desperate, I would walk away. But since I have no choice", he threw me on his lap bringing his arms around my plush waist to make me sit upon his length "Let's get this over with".

[lost-walmartbag]

Prom with Tolkien Black

Song: Loving is Easy - Rex orange county

Warning: Swearing

Background: Tolkien tries everything to win a contest at your expense.

Status: Request Open

Previous part

Next part

Prom was coming up and with it came a million different pre-prom challenges, competitions, and activities meant to get everyone excited. You never wanted to participate in them it felt pointless. But your friend Tolkien was into it mostly due to his competitiveness. With every new challenge or competition announced Tolkien was determined to be the first one to finish or be the one to win.

He often included his entire friend group in winning these challenges. When it was announced that the best-dressed group at prom would receive a prize he made Craig, Tweek, Clyde, Jimmy, and you shop with him in the most expensive store he could find.

"Come on guys we have to look good to win!" Tolkien said from outside the dressing room.

"Dude it's not a big deal the prize is probably just like a gift card," Clyde said struggling to change into his suit inside his own changing room.

"Y-yeah i-i-is it wo-wo-worth all this eff-eff-effort?" Jimmy asked inside his own room.

"Yes! It's not about the prize it's about winning," Tolkien said tapping his foot impatiently.

"You're not hearing any complaints from me. If you're buying a dress that makes me look this good then I'm on board." You said stepping out of the dressing room in a long, low-cut, tight-fitting purple dress that matched Tolkien's suit accents.

It was a coincidence that you would choose to wear the same colors as Tolkien. You really did just like the color, but the other guys said it would make you look like a couple. Tolkien stood there speechless. He just stared at your figure in the dress, making his face heat up. He put his hand up to his mouth as he cleared his throat.

"Y-yeah guys you need to look as good as Y/N!" He shouted to the other boys in their room still changing earning a groan in response.

That wasn't the end of him using you all to win these challenges. When it was announced that, anyone who could manage to run through a crowd of students throwing water balloons while holding someone in their arms bridal style without falling, could win free tickets to prom you knew Tolkien was going to as someone in the group to be his partner. You were the other guys and they groaned hearing the announcement knowing at any minute Tolkien would walk in and force one of you to do it with him.

"I'm not doing it," Craig said scrolling through his phone.

"M-Me either!" Tweek said hiding behind Craig his eyes darting around the room looking for Tolkien.

"Oh come on guys you know how much Tolkien loves these things." You said with a sigh.

"T-t-then you d-d-do it," Jimmy said frustratedly as he had been the one Tolkien used the most for his challenges.

"Yeah come on Y/N take one for the team," Clyde begged.

"Fine, I'll do it!" You say throwing your hands up

It didn't take long for Tolkien to find the group with a determined look on his face. Before he could ask you cut him off putting your hand up.

"I'll do it." You say with a sigh.

Tolkien's face lit up and without a word, he took your hand dragging you to where the challenge was held. As the challenge began Tolkien held you in his arms tightly. It was different but you couldn't lie, you loved it. You had a tiny thing for Tolkien that you chose not to pursue but being in his arms made it hard to ignore those feelings you had.

You two won of course but not without your face turning bright red. When Tolkien was handed his tickets he gave them to Kenny. It truly wasn't about the prize he just wanted to win. You admired that about him, but you didn't know how much longer you could keep doing this it was just making it harder to stay friends with him without wanting more. So your stomach dropped when two weeks before prom a promposal contest was announced.

You knew he was going to do anything to win. It made you nauseous thinking about him asking someone else, but honestly, him asking you was worst. You knew if he did ask you it would only be to win the competition so when Craig, Tweek, Jimmy, and Clyde ran over to you with panicked looks on their faces you knew what was coming. It all felt like it was in slow motion. Tolkien comes through the front doors holding a bouquet of a hundred flowers, wearing his suit, with a band playing a sappy love song behind him. It was beautiful.

You felt your heart just break at that moment. You didn't expect Tolkien to feel for you the way you felt for him or even understand that you felt a way for him, but god you just wished he would understand how fucked the situation was for you. He walked up to you with a confident smile that made you cringe. You just wanted to cry but nothing came out. You just watched him get on one knee and hold out the bouquet out to you as the band started to quiet down.

"Y/N will you go to prom with me?" He asked looking up at you as the other guys were behind you looking at you.

"I-I.." You say as tears well up in your eyes causing Tolkien's expression to change. "No."

A gasp filled the room. The band had completely stopped playing and Tolkien looked at you confused. You just shook your head and turned to the other guys. They were well aware of your feeling and how fucked up this situation must have been for you. They all pulled you into a hug and Tolkien stood up just staring at you all with a confused look.

"I-I don't.." Tolkien started reaching out for you but Craig stopped him.

"Just stop," Craig said making Tolkien's hands start to shake.

Did he say something wrong? Did he do something? He thought you'd like this. He got your favorite flowers he played your favorite song. He didn't understand. Luckily it was the end of the day so you didn't have to stay there long. The guys took you home leaving Tolkien to wrap his head around what just happened.

"You should talk to him," Clyde said walking you up to your door.

"S-she do-doesn't have t-to," Jimmy said.

"I just don't know what to do." You say wipping away your tears.

"Look Tolkien doesn't mean harm. He's just not that smart sometimes." Craig says with a sigh leading you inside your house.

"Y-yeah j-just not to think about it right now," Tweek said as softly as he could.

You nod and sit down on the couch. Your head was reeling why did he have to do this to you? Why couldn't he ask anyone else why did it have to be you?

"We can stay if you want," Clyde said softly.

"No, it-it's ok." You said. "Thank you, guys."

They nodded and left. You sat on that couch for what felt like only seconds. It was hours of you just thinking about how stupid you felt. You heard a knock on your door. You groan and get up walking over.

"I told yall it was ok." You say as you open the door revealing Tolkien.

"H-hey." He said looking down at you.

"Hey." You said softly.

"Can we talk?" He asked reaching for your hand.

Your hands start shaking and you lead him inside. "I guess."

"Look I'm sorry. I don't know what I did but I know I hurt you." He said turning you around to face him.

You look up at him and shiver under his gaze. "Why me?"

"What? Y/N I.."

"No Tolkien why the fuck did you choose me to help you win some stupid fucking contest!" You yell your tears welling up again. "I have loved you for years you fucking idiot and you do this? I'm not here to help you win some stupid fucking 10-dollar Starbucks gift card! Is that all I am to you?"

Tolkien grabs your wrist and pulls you in close to him. He crashed his lips onto yours. You melted under his touch it was all you wanted. You didn't want to pull back but you knew you had to.

"W-what..."

"I love you too Y/N. I didn't ask you, to win I asked because I want to go with you." He said holding you tightly. "I'm sorry that wasn't clear I am a fucking idiot."

"I-I'm sorry I said no." You said softly.

"No, I understand why you did. Maybe the band was a bit much." He joked making you laugh softly. "There she is. Now will you please go to prom with me?"

You smile softly and nod. You and Tolkien went hard on the prom challenges after that. The other guys were happy to see you both were happier and that you both were finally together. You two hadn't made it official yet but you knew you wanted to. On the day of the prom, Tolkien picked up the entire group in a limo. You stepped out and when you get into the limo the guys were happy to see you.

"You look amazing," Tolkien said sitting down next to you and holding your hand.

When you guys got to school you all stepped out hand in hand with your dates. You guys were definitely the best dressed which made Tolkien happy. As you guys walked inside people couldn't help but stare.

"God we're gonna win this best-dressed thing." You mumble with a smile.

"We're gonna win prom king and queen," Tolkien said with a smile.

Sure enough, he was right you guys ended up winning almost everything that night. When it came time for the king and queen Wendy announced your names. You and Tolkien walked up on the stage and let Kyle crown the both of you.

"Is there anything you want to say?" Wendy asked you both holding the microphone to you both.

Tolkien looked at you with a smile and you gave the same one back. "We won bitches!" You both said in unison.

"Join your king and queen on the dancefloor!" Wendy said.

You all flooded the floor and danced. It was an amazing night being with all the guys. But especially with Tolkien. He did everything to make the night perfect for you. As the night winded down one last slow song played. Tolkien took you in his arms and lead you.

"You have fun?" You ask him softly putting your head on his chest.

"I still am." He mumbled stroking your hair. "I love doing this with you."

"Me too."

"We can do this again." He said lifting your chin to face you. "Be my girlfriend?"

You smile and kiss his cheek softly. "Of course, Tolkien."

A/N: Hey guys thank you so much for reading I am both very sleep deprived and have a headache, so my apologies if my work has been booty cheeks. Also, I feel I have to say this because some of you might be wondering why I'm so bad at spelling, but I write these and don't look them over before posting because if I do I would not publish them because honestly, I do not like my writing so I post them and edit them after. Ik it's annoying so I'm sorry for that. But thank you so much for reading I hope you all have a good day. Love you all 🩷 🩷

[waitmyturtles]

SPOILERS AND ANALYSIS FOR THE EIGHTH SENSE, EPISODES 9 and 10. TURN AWAY IF YOU HAVEN’T SEEN IT YET! LONG POST!

MY HEART. IS. SO. FULL. 

Episode 9 almost (ALMOST!) reached Bad-Buddy-episode-10-level for me. That was a hell of an episode. 

And I am so thrilled, SO FREAKING THRILLED, to have been proven wrong about my theories as to whether or not episode 6 was “real” to the series. It was very real, and clearly so meaningful and contributive to Jae Won (as well, of course, to Ji Hyun), that... it sent Jae Won running, literally.

One more passing thought before I dig into the meal: 

I haven’t dug into this at ALL yet, but I think there might purposefully be a lot of similarities between The Eighth Sense and Where Your Eyes Linger, which (I think this is accurate, but PLEASE correct me if I’m wrong) was one of the first non-Strongberry Big KBLs to come out. I went back to Viki to make sure to confirm this, but Jung Seo In -- the restaurant ahjumma and Ji Hyun’s boss in T8S -- also plays a restaurant proprietor in Where Your Eyes Linger, and actually asks Han Tae Joo and Kang Gook “who’s top and who’s bottom” when she first meets them in WYEL (a little squick but she made it cute for that time). The promo picture for WYEL on Viki is of the two leads lying on the floor with their heads touching.... a different orientation, but a lot of the same feeling, as the opening of episode 10 of T8S. And, finally: Han Tae Joo of WYEL and Jae Won of T8S are both “the chairman’s son.” They are both sons in need of care.

That’s enough for a comparison for now to WYEL, because I haven’t spent enough time digging into it, but I’ll return to Ji Hyun’s ahjumma in a second, because she’s a badassssssss. Anyway:

Episode 9: What can I say. As with Bad Buddy episode 10, I’m struggling to get words down. I love a ride to a gorgeous union. 

And Jae Won, HONEY, Y’ALL TOOK ME ON A HELL OF A RIDE. DUUUUUUUUUUUUDDDDDDDDDDDEEEEEE. DUDE. I wanna be friends with you!

We learned some things. Ji Hyun brings light into Jae Won’s life. When we saw Jae Won with Eun Ji -- it was always in darkness (except for surf club earlier in the series, but Ji Hyun was there with Jae Won). jae Won eats with Eun Ji in a pojangmacha at night. He sits with Eun Ji in a dark library. He walks with Eun Ji on dark streets. She tries to kiss him in the nighttime. 

Ji Hyun sees that -- and something twists inside of Jae Won.

Then we get Jae Won and Eun Ji in the dark library. And, JEEEEZUS. WHOA! UM! I. did. not. expect. the. long. game. to. be. played. LIKE. THAT.

Motherfucker played a LONG-ASS, I’M A NAVY VETERAN, I CHASED AFTER YOU, I SAW YOU WITH ANOTHER GUY, I WAITED FOR YOU, I WAITED UNTIL MORNING, I SAW YOU WERE STILL WITH HIM, I SAW YOU WALKING OUT OF THE MOTEL WITH HIM, I SAW THAT, I CAME BACK, YOU TOOK ADVANTAGE OF MY FEAR ABOUT JI HYUN AND THE ACCIDENT, AND I REVENGE-DATED YOU, KINDA GAME, HEADSHAKE, SHRUG, I’M LOOKING AT MY NAILS, PSH.

BRO. WHAT. THE. EFF. 

I want a Cardi B song about this shit. Dude, you played that better than ANY female character in a K-drama that I have EVER seen, my man! You actually WENT AND DATED HER, LIKE KINDA LITERALLY-BUT-MAYBE-YOUR-HEART-WASN’T-ACTUALLY-INTO-IT-SO-MAYBE-IT-WAS-FOR-THE-ASSIGNMENT-DEALIE??? Good lord. 

Like, can that become a K-drama/KBL trope? Hot DAMN. ANYWAY. (Actually, one more reference to this for episode 10, but enough of the all caps, ha.)

You know what that means, right? While all that was going on, Jae Won’s heart WASN’T with Eun Ji. He was processing his stuff with Ji Hyun on his own, and with his therapist (once more, lol, @emotionallychargedtowel, take me to your analysis! I gotta know what you thought about the therapist calling Jae Won selfish!). 

Jae Won said it himself. He’s rooted in depression. He’s rooted in guilt about his brother’s death. He’s rooted in guilt over Ji Hyun’s accident. I will posit that episode 6 still felt like a “dream,” likely because of meds, likely because of Jae Won’s headstate. It was a “real” moment for the series but for where Jae Won’s head was at, he was likely battling a depressive episode with the continued, chronic guilt of his life. So things seemed fuzzy and jumpy -- because they were fuzzy and jumpy for Jae Won. 

(Whenever I try to describe these states to people, I try to think of relative moments... like being at work with four hours of sleep. Driving while your contact lens has something in it. You’re fuzzily in and out of reality. Jae Won’s depression is deeper than that. But I try to relate to it somehow with those metaphors.)

So the therapist does her own thing by calling Jae Won “selfish” for rooting in his pain. How we choose to judge her behavior is whatever -- it still gives me the jibbles, and I lean towards the utterly wonderful @emotionallychargedtowel for better analysis about therapy than me.

But, as we very clearly saw -- Jae Won’s breakthrough came through the restaurant ahjumma. Remember: she represents a break from tradition, as I said last week. She’s done with the bullshit of living by the rules of others.

She sees university students in and out, everyday, eating samgyupsal and drinking their sorrows away. She sees former students coming back to say hi. 

She’s been around the block, and has seen people get around the block themselves. She knows the advice that she’s giving to Jae Won. Unlike the therapist, she’s not gonna make Jae Won feel bad about himself. She’s just going to feed him and HELP HIM.

LET GO OF IT ALL, HONEY. GO AND GET YOUR MAN. 

And Jae Won finally let go. He went to the water. He took us with him to a flashback to the sea, to the light, where he’s the happiest. He took us to where he’s the freest that he can be.

And Ji Hyun called him back to Ji Hyun’s side. Called Jae Won back through music, and Jae Won heard him, and ran to Ji Hyun, and they embraced -- and it was perfect. 

I’m gonna be that auntie when I grow up.

Episode 10: There are a couple of side discussions with friends that I want to refer to, but let me say first that I have zero issues with this light, lovely conclusion. I am a SLAVE for K-drama tropes, and I didn’t mind that this episode had a few. This series did so beautifully to NOT hew to tropes, and to create a new paradigm of filmmaking in KBLs, that I was TOTALLY FINE with seeing some sweet tropey behavior -- the drinking, the partying, the dancing, the dance music. The love games. The heads leaning on shoulders. Coffees in cans. Let me give you my jacket. 

Friends @shortpplfedup and @lurkingshan and @wen-kexing-apologist: I’m okay with the forgiveness to Tae Hyung and Eun Ji. Because. 

I think Jae Won’s being a little shady, come awn. I think he popped his umbrella open. Just a little. Ji Hyun ADMITTED to being sassy, but I think Jae Won knew he was being just a little bitty-bit shady, and I’m gonna let the man have his. He’s a game-player. 

Eun Ji HAD TO ADMIT that she got her ass handed to her. And Ji Hyun and Jae Won both knew she’d have a hard time, internally. I’m fine with her being calm about it. She knew she fucked up the game, hard, when she got her ass caught cheating. We know she’s lame, she knows she’s lame, let’s live and move on.

I thought Jae Won’s read on Tae Hyung was great. Tae Hyung IS someone who wears his heart on his sleeve, however misguided it is. Humans are not perfect. Jae Won wants to be with honest people. (That’s why he dumped Eun Ji’s ass and handed her the receipts. He can forgive her, but he certainly AIN’T going out with her again.)

As Bed Friend ended with happy moment after happy moment -- I believe the filmmakers knew exactly what they were giving us with this finale. How we came to SUCH a happy ending just boggles me, but it was a loving and a sweet one. GO YOON WON AND JOON PYO. COME AWN. GO GO GO. (And go Bit Na! Reject that motherfucker. AND AE RI! GURL! I’m gonna miss you, nothing slides by you.)

And I want to refer back to something about the therapist conversation in episode 9 that got concluded in episode 10. I think it’s really important to note that BOTH Ji Hyun AND Jae Won took care OF EACH OTHER in these last two episodes.

Jae Won was rotting in guilt over not being able to TAKE CARE OF JI HYUN during the accident. Jae Won arguably got Ji Hyun in trouble. 

Ji Hyun, upon his recovery, TAKES CARE OF Jae Won. Ji Hyun handled the disciplinary committee. He gives Jae Won a disposable camera and encourages Jae Won’s photography. He continues to send Jae Won text messages, songs. Sending messages of hope and light and love. I’m still here, Jae Won, I haven’t left. Jae Won’s brother might not be here. Ji Hyun never left. 

What shocked Jae Won out of his stasis was the ahjumma’s words. I think Jae Won realized at that moment that -- AS AHJUMMA WAS SAYING ALL ALONG -- THAT JAE WON WAS OVERTHINKING THINGS. Once Jae Won could 

SEE. THE. LIGHT.

he was able to take off, and finally go back to Ji Hyun, in whole. 

(I think we know why the therapist’s office was dark. Jae Won couldn’t see the light in there. 

His light comes from Ji Hyun and the water.)

It’s a rarity, but I’m putting this on my short MUST WATCH list. This BLEW away any filmmaking expectations I previously had about KBLs. This was SINGULAR, groundbreaking, the actors ATE their roles, ATE THEM -- and it was utterly fulfilling.

PHENOMENAL SHOW. I’m going to miss this one TREMENDOUSLY. 

[elizabethplaid]

morning convo in the kitchen - march 20, 2025

Woke sometime after 10:30am and spent a bit lounging. I realized Neighbor-J was in the kitchen, chatting with dad, so there was no way to avoid being seen. I figured "eff it" and had my breakfast at the table with them.

We ended up chatting for about 3 hours (11-2), having a really great discussion. I was literally shaking out my hands to quell my utter glee! when my dad mentioned how Da Vinci's "Mona Lisa" needed to be cleaned, and I got to explain why they can't clean it (effectively).

Long-story short, I was able to weave a lot of ideas into things I'd already been contemplating lately. I specifically mentioned some "Pride and Prejudice" analysis, and J agreed that it's such a great story. (It's his wife fav story, too.) He has purposely curated a blue-collar appearance externally, but he's a very well-educated and intellectually curious guy. He can also be an ass for fun.

I appreciate that we can challenge each other and keep it jovial. I also played Tom Cardy's "Flirt (with your Dad)", because J is just a few months older than me.

Longer discussion below the cut

Neighbor-J is republican and sometimes says things that I clash with or irk me. (He also said something to purposely piss me off today, and I said "fuck you" to him.) But his understanding of the arts and philosophy is enjoyable in conversation. I was trying to understand his nuance of "labels" versus "descriptions" (eg "identity politics"), and I liked how we were able to break it down. The phrase "rationality versus intuition" paralleled "hard-strict rules versus flexible guidelines", and both kept coming up again and again.

The more we broke things down, the more we/things clicked. It was great! But his wider perspective still makes me flinch, when things get brought up. I better understand why/how he approaches things (eg school board policies), but they are nuanced situations that cannot be discussed in broader terms.

I don't have (close) siblings, but I'm assuming our dynamic might be like siblings? My half-sister is 9 years older than me, so we don't really have a lot of banter. I've never had a brother, either. Meanwhile, Neighbor-J is one of like 4 or 5 kids. He also has 5 kids, and most of his siblings have multiple kids. He's a rascal or scamp, in an amusing sense. I appreciate him, begrudgingly. He's pissed me off in the past, too.

In a heated conversation, a few years ago, I mentioned I wasn't straight. It was kind of brushed off and never referenced again. And my dad was not in the room, though J's wife heard it. I kept my distance for a few years, but I was able to hold conversations with him later. (The Excessive Stick Project is what "united" us, oddly enough.)

Sometimes I wonder if he ever told my dad, because I'm technically not out to him. I only considered I might be bi in the last several years, and I never discussed it with my dad. I've given hints it's a possibility. Even on tumblr, I don't talk about it much. It's not really any of my dad's business, especially when I'm not actively seeking out people to date.

I know he'd still love me. It's just when conversations about gays and gay culture, from whatever dad's read online, come up and I chime in with what I've learned via tumblr. There's a clash, and I want to say, "Dude, that is not what these people really want or how they think." But that's also the generational clash.

It makes me wonder how much of what I thought I was taught by my dad was actually things I learned from PBS or books or school or friends. And how much is just him aging and changing priorities.

To wrap back around to my original point, I guess that's why Neighbor-J isn't all bad. He's like a median point between me and dad. He connects with us both, particularly in ways that I might not relate to dad and vice versa. So he can sometimes be a bridge or a translator.

This is fodder for counseling, to be sure.

[7grandmel]

Rip of the week: 25/11/2024

Slope Dude

Season 4 Episode 2 Featured on: Summer-Colored Smiles ~ The SiIvaSummer All-Star Festival Collection

Ripped by eg_9371

You may notice it's been a while since the last post, as it was with the post before it, and so on. Truth be told, the switch to weekly posting came with its own set of issues for my flow of work; mainly, that I've gotten too damn ambitious in my writing for some of these posts. I'm incredibly happy with the end results of a lot of them and feel more confident in being able to wholeheartedly recommend reading any of my post-hiatus posts than I do a majority of my pre-hiatus posts...but it also means that I'm met with self-induced hurdles on how and what to write about. I can't just cover a rip that I just find funny and neat; It has to be historical, it has to be magnificent, it has to have immaculate pathos, has to tie into the SiIvaGunner spirit or whatever else I find myself waxing on about...

No, you know what? Screw it. I'm behind on my posts anyway. We're doing a simple goodie today. Writing the same day it's posted, of a rip I just keep returning to for a good laugh, with no strings attached. Old-school style. Slope Dude.

Back on Lagplane, I mused a bit about the novelty of memes that leave us almost as quickly as they arrive, the consequences of the intensely rapid meme economy born from modern social media. It was a lot of waffling to justify writing about a flamboyant Andrew Tate impersonator, but it's hardly as if these trend-based jokes are a new occurrence on SiIva. I'm reminded of how 2016 saw a handful of rips poking fun at then-notorious online figure Keemstar, for instance – but perhaps stranger than these, are when jokes on SiIva crop up without any recent relevancy, are incredibly prominent for the length of a season or so, and then fade away just as suddenly as they appeared. Unlike Stuck Inside of FEEL SO FINE STUCK INSIDE fame, unlike the Mad Mew Mew Becoming Uncanny rips, unlike so many other jokes on the channel...the appearance of Game Dude on SiIvaGunner throughout Season 4 felt as if it came out of nowhere, made even stranger by just how limited its presence felt. We got a handful of rips, a bunch of appearances in medley rips, a cameo in a lore video, and then the tune was out just as quickly as it had entered. No relevancy, no big explosive tie to the themes or intent of Season 4 Episodes 1 or 2 in particular; just a silly theme with a handful of rippers who decided to play around with it.

Part of me wonders, akin to rips like old town ribbon race, just how much of the appeal of the joke here becomes lost without whollistic knowledge of its lore. The tale of Game Dude is one of the internet's many bizarre sidequests, long overdue for a YouTube video essay a la HBomberGuy's body of work to truly bring it all to light, yet for now still remaining obscure enough to only be spread in whispers between those who know. It was the kind of thing I myself was given the "privilege" of uncovering on my own terms after first watching a Game Grumps episode built entirely on indirectly mocking him and growing all-too-curious about what he's up to; one of many Angry Video Nerd Clones trying and failing ever so badly at being funny playing bad video games, Game Dude's last legacy online would be to be known as the guy who fled his home state when called to court over stalking his ex-girlfriend. It gives the imagery of a bumbling, somewhat pathetic figure, someone who tried and failed to find online fame through poor mimicry and wound up unable to take proper responsibility for themselves. Like the aforementioned Lagplane, it adds just that extra aura to the theme song attached to the character, the original intro to his theme songs; once a song with the levity focused on the games and show now feels as if its mocking the very person making the videos themselves. Indeed, few things are as certain as life, death, and the Nostalgia Critic effect.

All that is to say, that I get a lot of amusement from the Game Dude theme, and of all its handful of rips focusing exclusively on it I think eg_9371 hit the nail right on the head with Slope Dude. There's no gimmicks, twists or turns; its as simple as a melodyswap/arrangement rip can be, an Outertale or Jesus of the Underground that trades in the pathos and nostalgia for a complete commitment to the silliness of the bit. Slope from Super Mario RPG, like much of the game's soundtrack, already has such a bombastically silly tone to it; the buildup to the main melody finally kicking in at 0:14 in particular sells the joke so much harder, a marching band drum roll all to introduce the fucking Game Dude theme. The instrumentation feels absolutely perfect for the tune and is matched equally as perfectly by the context said tune appears in in the game, running after Booster up a slope midway through the game. The hummability of the melody, the context of Game Dude's situation and the silliness of the sound means the jokes write themselves; as one commenter says, "He is the Game Dude // He is so rude // He flees the country // when his court date is due".

As per expected of eg_9371 and his ripping prowess, Slope Dude is about as pitch perfect as it could be, an idea pursued to its logical endpoint much like Forest of Tears or dong music. Regardless of scale or time invested, the rip ends up being enjoyable in such a simple way, applying the perfect amount of levity applicable to such an absurd figure of YouTube's past. It's likely a lot of SiIva viewers completely forgot that Game Dude was at one small point considered a reoccurring meme on the channel, and he never quite got anywhere past his introduction the same way something like the similar-in-spirit Minecraft With Gadget of Season 2 got with Become as Gadget. Yet the small handful of rips featuring him were still there, all condensed all into Season 4 Episode 2 in particular; and though he's likely to remain forgotten by most fans, I'll remain a loyal Game Dude – and Slope Dude – fan until nobody else remains.

[madraleen]

Genshin Impact - Cyno’s Second Story Quest A Fond Commentary

(*from a Cynonari shipper)

-ASJFNJDFK, we’ve grown so close to Cyno over time, he’s so soft compared to when we first met him, he calls us friends, he invites us along, I cry. I remember thinking in his first quest, “We’ll win you over, we’ll win you over,” and now look at us :”).

-The fact that that man raised Cyno is hilarious to me. Their vibes are so different, it’s delightful.

-ASDKNDFS, “Bring Tighnari along too.” CYRUS!! Feed me, Cyrus!! The parental figure approves!!

-The fam is eating with Cyrus, I cry. Also, wdym they were both students together, you’re blurring the timeline again, argh!

-Kaveh!!

-Yes, we have some “us time” with Cyno, Tighnari and Collei, ily. Wtf is happening, they’re taking us camping?? Hoyo, you feed me so well!

-We’re all so happy, are we gonna get murdered or something

-I can’t believe we’re seeing Cyno jokes in an actual quest and not just in events, is this real?! Are we really getting soft Cyno, soft Cynonari, what is this, is this reality?! I’m so happy!

-Ahahaha, “it looks like we’ll get told off” and Tighnari’s face omg, I love this fam.

-Dude, this is so fun. And Hoyo knows exactly what they’re doing with the “three tents,” you can’t change my mind. Who shares?

-Cyno smiles at us, my heart, I cannot (*Cyno smiles a lot in this quest :’))))

-Kaveh and Alhaitham. Hoyo knows. 

-Everyone’s so domestic, thank you Hoyo, thank you. Kaveh and Alhaitham actually having calm conversations, calmly living together and putting their minds together, Kaveh sitting on the table, it’s so nice.

-Cyno: “Don’t come after me.” Literally everyone: “Yeah, so, anyway, how do we find him?” <333 Like, they don't even discuss if they should, Kaveh just goes "typical Cyno" and they move to action. What a great little extended fam, Cynonari, Collei, Kaveh and Alhaitham (and later Candace and Dehya, and Faruzan. What a great little found fam).

-Tighnari is coming to the desert himself??? For Cyno??? I cry. (Yeah yeah and for Cyrus. Would he be coming along if Cyno wasn’t involved? I don’t think so.)

-We’re meeting Naphis!!! What is this blessing of a quest!

-Like, I love intrigue and mystery and so on, but our bonds in Sumeru are just so pure and precious to me. This clear-cut “We’re transparent, we have each others’ back, and that’s that” of the Sumeru cast, I love it. And I love that it’s an ensemble cast quest, it’s so long since we’ve seen everyone together.

-Like, Tighnari could leave this to us, or to Kaveh, but no, absolutely not, he wants to PERSONALLY be with Cyno in this, like??? Tighnari ily???

-Sethos!!! Hi, bb, whoever you are <3.

-Sethos is a medium model, right? He looks so much smaller than Aether, Cyno and Tighnari. Younger even, even though he’s around the latter two’s age.

-I love that Cyno and Tighnari are equally clueless and are learning about Cyno’s past together. I always wondered - is the Temple of Silence thing something that Cyno hides? Does Tighnari know? Why do his character stories say so little on that, is it a secret? Turns out no, he’s just as clueless as everyone.

-Cyno’s parents essentially sold him…??? Huh?! I wasn’t expecting that!!!

-No, you didn’t borrow the Ba Fragment “for a decade or so,” Cyrus, don’t blur the timeline ffs! Unless we’re talking until Cyno became of age or something, or unless that "or so" is a big understatement.

-Everyone is tense and dramatic and “power this, fragment that” and Tighnari is like, “Sumanai, but u dumb.”

-Doctor Tighnari strikes again!

-Such a beautiful temple and it’ll just disappear after the quest?

-Lmfao, what is that pose before the duel, are we “the challengers” preparing to drop an album ahahaha

-Oh eff off, Cyno saying “I am more than a warrior. I am my own person,” and cutting to Tighnari saying “...Exactly”. That was SO UNNECESSARY! HOYO YOU FEED ME WELL

-Looove how Cyno won via polearm and not via Hermanubis or vision. Also lil Sethos is one of those multi-weapon users, huh

-Oh that’s such a nice conclusion, Cyno and Sethos not being enemies and now the Academiya and the Temple can be partners again. I like Sethos, I'm looking forward to us seeing him again and him making connections in Sumeru. Hopefully we'll get a hang-out next patch?

-Lol, Sethos granting us access to the Temple, catch Alhaitham moving in here smh

-Faru :”). All the familiar faces, I miss them :’)

-THEY HAVE A SIGNAL! CYNO AND COLLEI HAVE A SIGNAL! HELP!!! Pity that Collei had to be sacrificed for the sake of her guardians.

-HELP, they have their own code words as a family, they are so soft, they are so adorable, they are my favorite genshin fam, my favorite genshin ensemble cast, i love them so much. Like, Hoyo didn’t have to go that hard on the intimacy of it all AND YET! THEY DELIVERED! Also, pls, the timeline, wdym you were in school with Cyno when in Tighnari’s stories it says that student Tighnari attracted the attention of General Mahamatra Cyno, omggggg. Unless you’re saying that Cyno was simultaneously a student and the General Mahamatra at some point, OR that Cyno had the General Mahamatra mentality as a student and conducted his own investigations.

-I’ve seen too much fanart to believe that you’ll just “put the books back” in the House of Daena, Kaveh and Alhaitham. I know exactly what you’re gonna do there. We all know. -CYNO HAS A SECRET PLACE AND TIGHNARI KNOWS IT AND NOW WE KNOW IT THIS QUEST IS SO SOFT ASKJSFDNK

-BABY CYNO OMGGG SMOL. And them talking about Lisa, so sooooft :”)

-Color me elated.

[doctorstrangereview]

0049: Strange Tales #155

Cover Date: April 1967 On-Sale Date: January 10, 1967

We're at the penultimate installment of the Umar arc; Ms. Severin starts to let her hair down an bit and her freak flag flies a bit, artistically speaking. It's nice to see our resident artist get somewhat more comfortable with the material. As a bonus, Doc and Clea actually get into each others' physical presence! What lies ahead? Let us see.

When we last left our hero, Umar had cast a deadly spell towards Clea through one of the Dark Dimension's smoky, floaty TVs. Doc ain't having it. He goes racing after Clea so fast that "she is suspended in time" and Umar doesn't notice his absence. She only see's his speed lines. Heck, she's still casting her spell when this happens. He's giving Quicksilver and The Flash a run for their money! Like Superman or Green Lantern moving the Earth out of the way of a deadly meteor, Doc manages to shove Clea out of the way Umar's deadly beam.

Once Clea is safely out of harm's way, Doc is taking no crap and sends the spell back to Umar when she doesn't exactly have a pleasant experience about it.

I always found this interesting. Dormammu and Umar are massively powerful entities. Why is she calling on other entities? Considering it's her own spell, you'd think she could just absorb it back into her. The incantation itself is also interesting in light of what will be revealed in the future. Dormie and Umar will eventually be revealed as members of the Faltine. I guess it would make sense to call on them. More than a decade after we learn Umar's origin, we also learn that Satannish is one of Dormie's creations, from billions of years ago. Umar is essentially calling on her nephew.

As Umar recovers, Doc and Clea reunite. Ms. Severin draws her like H. G Peter drew women in Wonder Woman. Sadly, she omits the wonderfully funky giant collar that was her trademark for her first couple of decades.

So now what? Doc and Clea gotta split this crazy dimension. Of course, crazy things will happen along the way. Doc initially tries the speedster trick again attempt to get the heck outta Dodge before anything has a chance to be naughty to them.

This has unexpected results.

This probably would have looked cooler as moebius strip with their duplicates appearing upside down relative to our duo. (I didn't say the other side of the strip, because, technically, a moebius strip only has one side.) The All-Purpose Amulet comes to the rescue. Not only is Ms. Severin a bit lazy drawing the amulet in action, but it turns everything monochrome and the colorist gets a break for a few panels.

Doc and Clea confront their Road of Repetition duplicates and merge with them. Now that their whole, a recovered Umar resumes her attack on the pair. The ground itself rises up to attack them. Doc fends this off with a circle of The Flames of Faltine! These Faltine aren't too discriminating about to whom they send their power. Maybe I should try calling on them the next time I buy lottery tickets.

Clea is starting to despair ever getting the heck outta Dodge and Doc is like "eff it, I'm calling for help." Doc's call looks a lot like Aquaman's sea-creature telepathy and heads across the cosmos to The Ancient One. The old dude responds with a magic bridge that looks like a series of glowing interlocking circles. Whatever the looks, it serves it's purpose.

Doc get's through both Umar's dark and scary clouds and the giant wall of text he spouts that really don't add much to the situation. We get to see The Ancient One in the next panel showing him maintaining the bridge. Instead of a frail, centuries old man, he looks like a hot, mature daddy! Especially with the long beard and bald head.

Marie, this panel makes up for your previous deficiencies on this series! Thank you!

Next, Doc returns to the old dude's pad and Marie gives us another wonderfully dramatic panel! You go, Ms. Severin!

The Ancient One tells Doc he must rest up and then perform a spell of vanishment to keep Clea safe. This is the most dreaded spell of all, until the next most dreaded spell of all comes along. Doc is sent out of the room so Clea and the old dude can have their fun. He reads the spell and the scroll it's written on follows Clea to wherever they go. Stan gives us a "it's so dire that we can't reveal the spell here"

How does a one use spell even work? How would you know if it's most dreaded spell if it's never been used before? Are there other copies of the scroll somewhere? Is there a temple or cave somewhere with stacks of these things?

It's just moments after their reunion and Clea is gone again. We won't see her again for quite awhile. But when we do, her awesome giant collar will have grown back.

Doc and his mentor now have a wordy argument with Doc wanting to take revenge on Umar while The Ancient One is like "nah bro, she too powerful and is evil incarnate." Doc insists and the old man gets all shady.

Naturally, Doc can't attack his teacher. There's a very wordy exchange between the two of them with The Ancient One telling Doc "this is for your own good and it hurts me more than it hurts you" while explaining he must banish Doc as well to keep him safe, but not to the same place he sent Clea. Why? Because Umar walks the Earth! Stay tuned!

I have a certain affection for this story. Back when I first discovered Doctor Strange, I had only read a couple of contemporary appearances (around 1979-1980) and the half of the original Ditko stories from the Pocket Book reprint (Strange Tales 110-129). A reprint of this story appears in Origins of the Marvel Comics. It was the first non-recent, non-Ditko story I read. It was also completely out of context and I wouldn't read the rest if the arc for years.

Ms. Severin is improving and her Dark Dimension is more imaginative than in the previous story. He style is still shaky. Her use of negative space is less effective than Ditko's. The actually dark Dark Dimension conflicts with Ditko's very bright rendition creating a conflict in readers' minds between the name and physical appearance. The overall style is a bit shaky, lacking Ditko's bonkers imagery and Everett's precision. But, she is progressing.

As for the story itself, it drags at the end. I get the feeling that Stan was attempting to fill the 10 pages without thinking up more plot. It gets very wordy without adding to the story. But the two creatives do give us a memorable final panel.

[paisholotus]

Zintlanu

Wakanda

Stella's Pov

3 weeks later

 

It's been extremely difficult. Little N'Jadaka has been grieving his father's death. Every night, he cried for his father. My heart was broken.

 

I'll never forget his face when I told him we were going to Wakanda.

 

Flashback 

 

Narrative 

 

It warmed her heart to see him light up with the biggest smile. When Stella introduced him to Queen Mother, his aunt, and his cousin T'challa, he was excited. Little N'Jadaka was overjoyed to finally see his Wakandan relatives.

 

T'chaka, however, was enraged after Stella disobeyed him and brought the boy anyway. Regardless of his threats, N'Jadaka had asked where his father was, but Stella told him that he was away on a mission and would be home soon. Stella told N'Jadaka to play with her grandchildren and his cousin while she talked to King T'Chaka privately. He smiled and ran off to play.

 

She gave a big smile to Queen Mother and asked how she and the little one were doing, rubbing Ramonda's stomach. She kissed Stella's cheek and asked what she was doing in Wakanda.

 

Stella quickly told Ramonda that she was here because N'Jobu left little N'Jadaka behind in her care while he was here on a mission. But Ramonda looked at her confusedly and said that she thought he was being punished for betraying Wakanda.

 

Stella told her it was a misunderstanding, and they caught the actual person who was trying to frame N'Jobu. That's when T'chaka sent N'Jobu on another mission, so N'Jobu wanted me to watch N'Jadaka while he was away. But he's on his way here.

 

Ramonda looked towards T'chaka in response and asked him why he hadn't told her. He looked at Stella and quickly smiled, telling her he was going to tell her it was a misunderstanding, but he didn't want to stress her and the baby more than she already was. Plus, N'Jobu coming and bringing his son was supposed to be a surprise.

 

Ramonda nodded understandingly and groaned, rubbing her stomach, saying the baby was kicking. She went over to hug Stella and kissed her cheek, saying it was good to see her again. Then she walked over to her husband and kissed him goodbye.

 

When he made sure Ramonda walked out, he turned, gave a harsh glare, and said, "MY STUDY NOW!" He growled. Stella glared at him and held her head high, walking out of the room.

 

She followed him into his study, and as soon as they made it into the room, she watched the Dora Milaje close the door and turned to look at T'chaka when, in instinct, she caught his wrist that tried to go across her face.

The Dora Milaje stepped forward in retaliation. But her eyes began to glow a white color. She raised her hands in the air, and the wind circled the room, picking up Dora Milaje and having them drop their weapons. She backed T'chaka against the wall; a gust of wind surrounded him, lifting him from the ground into the air.

 

She gave him a deadly glare and said, "YUH TEK HEED FOR WAH MI BOUT TUH TELL YOU! IF YOU DO ANYTHING AN MI MEAN ANYTHING TO HARM DIS BOI, IT'LL BE YUH LASS DAY BREATHING MI AIR THROUGH YUH LUNGS!" She said, dangerously low, walking towards him.

 

"I will remain responsible for Di Boi, but he will be part of my family! HIS FAMILY! Migon to get his madam out of prison. That dude only has one parent left! AN MI BE DAMN EFF YUH BE DI REASON OF DAT BEING TAKEN AWAY FROM HIM!" She said she was bringing him down to eye level, staring into his eyes.

"Do I make myself clear?" T'chaka didn't say anything but glare at her. She grabbed him by his suit and pulled him into her face. "Yuh, Betta, act like it." She said it sternly. She backed away, letting go of him, stopped the air swarming around the room, and put Dora Milaje down.

 

They had a little glare. Stare off before T'challa busted into the room, asking his father if he could give N'Jadaka a tour around Wakanda. T'chaka looked at Stella, giving him a look. He hesitantly looked at T'challa and smiled, saying it was fine. As long as he went to the places, he was allowed to go.

 

The kids followed T'challa out of the room except for N'Jadaka, who ran and hugged Stella and thanked her for bringing him to Wakanda. Stella bent down, kissed the top of his head, and told him to go on with the rest of the kids.

 

She smiled, watching him run off; at least he'll be with family when she tells him about N'Jobu.

 

End of flashback

 

It's been like this since we've been in Wakanda for four days. I rubbed Erik's back soothingly as she silently cried in my lap. I told Erik his father was killed on a mission. I said he died saving a lot of people. I've never seen a child so heartbroken; it tore me apart to see him like this.

 

All this was caused by a hateful man. I don't care what anybody says; killing someone in cold blood and then trying to abandon a child is not king-worthy. And he should not be sitting on that chair.

 

I looked down at Erik and frowned. I lifted his head and made him look into my eyes. "Erik, sweetheart, yuh memba dat promise mi made?' He nodded, wiping his eyes.

 

"Mi pramise mi will get yuh mada outta jail, okay, luv? But til then, mi pramise tuh luv yuh, tuh care fi yuh, an tuh kip yuh safe, alright." He nodded and hugged me tightly, laying his head in the crook of his neck.

 

I held him tightly, humming and rocking us side by side. I heard a knock on the door and told them to come in. I walked into T'challa with my grandkids. They walked over and climbed on to the bed, watching me comfort Erik. T'challa crawled over to me and pulled off Erik, giving him a hug. My heart melted at T'challa's telling Erik it was going to be okay.

 

I got off the bed and smiled at the kids. "OK, how about we get a midnight snack?" They nodded and got off the bed, except for Erik, who grabbed my hand and raised his hands up, telling me he wanted to be picked up.

 

I chuckled and picked him up, kissing the side of his head, and walked with the children out of the room.

[valeriefauxnom]

i just caught up to your post canon dragalia fic in one day and hollyy shit dude. i am on the edge of my seat!!!! its so enjoying and well versed and i cannot wait for the next chapter

Ahhh! I always am ecstatic to hear reviews or even just random thoughts of any kind regarding my work, but hearing people like my work on Scaling enough to binge it is even crazier! I will forever be more and more amazed people have done that as the length increases, like don't they say an average novel is like about 50k words?? That would mean you've just binged 3 novels of my crazy assortment of thoughts on a possible post game scenario for a dead game in 1 day, which is nuts!

With Scaling in particular having such long chapters I worry sometimes that I'm getting a bit too lost in all my thoughts for it and getting too wordy, so it's always nice to see people are still enjoying it after it has grown increasingly complex, even if we are starting to get closer to a more definitive break in the case, were it a proper mystery novel.

You're the first person to send anything on Tumblr about it (or anything in general really), too, so this message is precious in another way! I'm always glad to field questions (though of course would shy away from spoiling my own works) or explain more about why x decision was made because boy I think I should just make 'overthinking' my hallmark at this point!

As a treat for how much this makes my week, here's a little snippet of a dragalia fic in progress that will probably be a long time in the making yet if it ever does see the light of day on AO3 properly, (so I don't get distracted by yet another thing instead of working on Scaling and/or finishing Control). It's a tentative collection solely based around the concept of the siblings finding out just how weird the Halidom is, especially Leonidas and Chelle since he was in charge of it for all that time and she's always poking about for info.

---

But when he looked back up to the expenses log, all the expenses listed were sky-high as well. The food expense, dragon expenses, aid expense, equipment expense, everything was all exceedingly high for such a small nation (as they should be, given what he knew about Euden’s governance). But to still draw a profit if expenses weren’t being understated meant an even more ridiculous income. 

Sure enough, the few categories under income were even more egregious. Tax revenue was relatively moderate, but other revenue sources like ‘precious gems/mining products’, ‘gifts’ and ‘tourism income’ were far, far beyond what was rational in a kingdom engaged in war for its entire history. 

Just as he was about to start demanding explanations for the inflated income, he spotted yet another egregious, incomprehensible bit to the income column. “Pipple?” He said, almost hostile, “What exactly is a pipple, and why is it on the income statement, let alone for such riches it is supposedly bringing in? No, no, I think I understand now.” Not waiting for an answer, Leonidas began to speculate. He’d never heard of anything sounding like ‘pipple’ before, and Leonidas boasted quite the vocabulary as crown prince. He was expected to have a suitably verbose and eloquent bank of words with which to communicate with foreign heads of state and domestic nobility alike. That meant this was likely something of a new invention in language.

A new invention, and something that brings in exorbitant funds…something very well hidden, if Chelle did not report on its trade or presence in a service business when we made joint moves on the Halidom, and it’s that sizable of an industry in New Alberia…Ah. 

Quite devious of you, brother. I never expected for you to become so involved with such a shady industry, but it explains a great deal of their surprising shadow wealth.

There was only one thing this ‘Pipple’ could be: some sort of newfangled illicit drug his brother was putting to market as a supplier, raking in rupies hand over fist as people learned the effects of whatever potent cocktail this Pipple was composed of.

Desperate times called for desperate measures, and a new nation in war against a vastly more powerful, established land was desperate indeed.

---

So yeah, thank you again for your message! Not to toot my own horn too much, but if you're eager for maybe a bit more dragalia fic from me as you wait, I've got another fic up on AO3, though it's not connected with Scaling or even canon in general as a bad-end au what if! It's also likely not quite as polished, being written in like 2 days, but hey I'm just too happy about the two artworks my best friend made for it and now am legally obligated to try and show the art off at any given moment!

[pesterloglog]

Roxy Lalonde, John Egbert

Act 6, page 6453-6459

ROXY: hay look

ROXY: its jake stuffed in a blue windsock

ROXY: heheheh

JOHN: huh?

ROXY: n/m

ROXY: so what kind of hot god tier trix can you teach me

JOHN: tricks...

JOHN: i guess i don't know any actual TRICKS per se, aside from how to use some of my powers.

JOHN: but i don't know if the same tricks apply to using your powers...

ROXY: u said u could help tho

JOHN: i said MAYBE i could!

JOHN: i dunno, i was just throwing it out there.

JOHN: like, maybe if i told you about some of the experiences i had when i was learning to do my windy stuff, you might have some kind of... voidey epiphany?

ROXY: a voidey epiphany

JOHN: yes.

ROXY: k then

ROXY: im all ears johnny windsock

ROXY: let loose ur wisdom whilst i rake in the epiphanies

JOHN: ok, um,

JOHN: i've noticed whenever i learn to do new things with my powers, it's usually in response to something. like something important that has to be done.

JOHN: so why are you trying to make this spike ball?

JOHN: and how important does it feel to you?

ROXY: well at first i was mainly tryin to make it because dog girl was forcing me to

ROXY: but now i think i keep trying because im gettin obsessed with making this dumb spikeball and PO'd that i cant do it

JOHN: i see.

JOHN: what actually IS this spike ball, if you don't mind my asking?

ROXY: its an alien egg

ROXY: 4 tha trolls

ROXY: to hatch em all back to life

ROXY: but only to be ruled by an evil witch so its gonna be shitty for them

ROXY: so yeah its kind of an important thing

ROXY: but at the same time it would probably be terrible if i actually made it so...

JOHN: then maybe the fact that you're conflicted about it is why you're having trouble?

ROXY: yeh maybe

JOHN: if you think it's important to make, but don't want to give it to the bad guys, why don't you just...

JOHN: break out of jail?

JOHN: then you could try to make the egg at your own discretion, and use it however you think is best.

ROXY: idk

ROXY: i broke outta here once already and the fuckin witch just nabbed me again

ROXY: and that was BEFORE she recruited jakes omnipotent goofball grandma to zap me back here the moment i step outside

JOHN: yeah. it is a tricky situation with grimbark jade on the loose, that's for sure.

JOHN: but i've been managing to evade her.

JOHN: i just swoosh the breeze around to hide my scent, and dissolve into wind and fly away if she finds me.

JOHN: maybe you could do something like that too?

JOHN: it seems to me if anyone should be able to avoid detection using their powers, it would be a void player.

JOHN: get it? a void... as in, avoid?

JOHN: heh.

ROXY: that is legit sound reasoning yo

ROXY: + a way lame pun 2 boot

ROXY: but remember how we were just talkin about the fact that when it comes to god tier shit i dont know what the eff im doin??

JOHN: oh.

JOHN: right.

ROXY: anyway

ROXY: i thought you were going to regale me with stories of your ascent through the windsock tiers

ROXY: such that i may through osmosis glean the vagaries of godhood

ROXY: then all i got to do is wait for this rude tidal wave of epiphanies n junk to wash over me and get me hella wise

ROXY: then and only then

ROXY: i will b able to make this shitty egg happen

ROXY: k?

JOHN: ok. where should i start?

ROXY: at the beginning!

JOHN: you mean like when i first became a god tier?

JOHN: that's a long story... i was kind of tricked into that.

JOHN: it might take some setup to understand.

ROXY: dude look

ROXY: i dont have grand illusions that this yarn you spinll be like some actual efficacious tutelage on fuckin pajama spells

ROXY: i just want to hear u talk about stuff

ROXY: wanna kno ur stories!!!

ROXY: go :3

JOHN: alright.

JOHN: in that case, i guess it all started on my thirteenth birthday.

JOHN: which was three years ago, by the way.

JOHN: i heard about this awesome game, or at least one i thought was awesome, and i wanted to play it with my friends.

JOHN: but it wasn't so easy to start. i had to get it from the mail, which meant sneaking around the house while avoiding my dad.

JOHN: which was kind of stupid and childish in retrospect, but blah blah blah.

JOHN: blah blah blah blah blah.

JOHN: blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah.

ROXY: hmmmmm

ROXY: go on

JOHN: blah blah blah blah blah blah blah meteor.

JOHN: blah blah blah.

JOHN: blah blah blah blah blah nannasprite blah blah blah blah oil everywhere blah blah blah blah blah blah imps blah blah blah.

ROXY: m hm

JOHN: blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah.

JOHN: blah blah blah your daughter blah blah at least i think she is blah blah blah blah.

JOHN: blah salamanders blah blah blah.

JOHN: blah blah blah blah blah trolls blah blah blah blah blah rocketpack blah blah blah died.

ROXY: rly

JOHN: blah blah karkat blah blah blah blah blah ectobiology.

JOHN: blah blah blah jack noir.

JOHN: blah blah blah blah blah blah blah queen's ring blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah my dad blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah a girl named vriska.

JOHN: blah blah blah blah windy thing blah blah blah blah blah blah ocean of green fire.

ROXY: wow

JOHN: blah blah blah quest bed blah blah blah blah blah.

JOHN: blah blah prototyped blah blah blah blah blah blah blah jade's omnipotent dog.

JOHN: blah blah chess guy blah blah blah blah blah flying around in my dad's car blah blah blah blah blah blah blah liv tyler.

JOHN: blah the battlefield blah blah blah blah huge wind drill blah blah blah blah the tumor.

JOHN: blah blah.

ROXY: pls continue

JOHN: blah blah blah followed rose blah blah blah blah blah blah blah mom and dad died blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah kissed her back to life.

JOHN: blah blah blah blah the scratch.

JOHN: blah blah huge record blah blah blah blah blah blah giant needle.

JOHN: blah blah blah blah blah green sun blah blah blah blah blah reset blah blah blah blah blah god tier jade blah blah blah blah blah blah blah golden battleship.

ROXY: ur kiddin me

JOHN: blah blah blah blah blah through a giant window.

JOHN: blah blah three years blah blah blah blah blah blah con air.

JOHN: blah blah thought it sucked blah blah blah blah but eventually came to my senses blah blah.

JOHN: blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah ghost busters 2 mmorpg.

ROXY: mm

JOHN: blah blah blah blah blah blah DUEL WITH JACK NOIR!

JOHN: blah blah blah TURNED INTO WIND AND ESCAPED blah blah blah blah blah blah.

JOHN: blah blah blah blah COOL HAT WITH RABBIT EARS!

ROXY: oooh

JOHN: blah blah blah CRACKS IN PARADOX SPACE blah blah blah ENCHANTED DESERT blah blah blah MAGIC RING!

JOHN: blah blah ADVENTURE ON THE HIGH SEAS blah blah blah blah blah blah GHOSTLY TROLL PIRATES!

JOHN: blah ULTIMATE WEAPON blah blah blah blah blah blah DEFEAT LORD ENGLISH!

ROXY: !!

JOHN: blah blah blah blah HOUSE SHAPED THINGY!

JOHN: blah blah POKED MY HAND INSIDE blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah UNSTUCK IN CANON!

JOHN: blah blah blah TURNED BLURRY blah blah blah blah CLOWNS ON TOP OF THE WHITE HOUSE blah blah blah blah VAMPIRE HISSED AT ME blah blah blah blah LITERALLY INSIDE CON AIR blah blah blah GLITCHY BULLSHIT blah blah blah MET MYSELF blah blah blah blah FINALLY FOUND YOU HIDING IN THIS LITTLE GREEN PYRAMID! WHEW!

ROXY: omg

JOHN: so that's...

JOHN: pretty much the whole story?

JOHN: i left a bunch of stuff out though.

JOHN: if more important stuff that i forgot occurs to me, i will let you know.

ROXY: hey no thats fine

ROXY: that was all great and exciting as heck

ROXY: it sounds like you guys got up to a lot more crazy shit than we did

ROXY: for us its been mostly dicking around in a session full of spooky skeletons for half a year

ROXY: then fefeta died

ROXY: the end

JOHN: fefeta?

ROXY: fefeta was a dear sweet precious dear DEAR friend of mine

ROXY: she was beautiful and sweet and lovely

ROXY: she sploded

JOHN: wow.

JOHN: i'm sorry.

ROXY: oh we also became tricksters which as far as things that happen go was sooo dumb

ROXY: i guess thats kinda the epilogue of our story?

ROXY: oh yeah then we had hangovers and went god tier accidentally

ROXY: thats the double epilogue

ROXY: the end ex two combo

JOHN: i don't know, that all sounds pretty interesting to me.

JOHN: sometimes in life, when you look back on things it can feel like it was all boring and uneventful.

JOHN: but when you really think about it, you remember all these cool things that happened you forgot about.

ROXY: hm yeah

ROXY: them wise words j sock

JOHN: anyway, if you remember more about your adventure and want to tell me some time, i would love to hear it!

ROXY: haha ok

ROXY: um but hey

ROXY: i could not help but notice in ur story you was talkin about my mom sometimes

JOHN: your mom?

JOHN: well, yeah. but i know her as your daughter.

JOHN: but i mean, who the hell knows at this point?

ROXY: i know rite

ROXY: the curious case of the mutual moms

ROXY: it is

ROXY: the biggest mystery?

ROXY: u no

ROXY: once i even caught wind of some lore that implied i might even be my OWN mom

ROXY: (fefeta hinted that @ me once during a long spiel DAMN that girl could talk)

ROXY: how messed up would that be tho

JOHN: there is probably something to that actually.

JOHN: you were all the first batch of babies, after all.

JOHN: i think you were literal copies of yourselves?

JOHN: that's what it supposedly means to be a paradox clone.

ROXY: babies

ROXY: wat

JOHN: oh.

JOHN: i guess i kind of glossed over this stuff in my story.

JOHN: but i was the one who made us all in the first place, with a weird cloning machine.

ROXY: no fuckin shit???

ROXY: *is impressed*

JOHN: it was no big deal though. i was just messing around with a control panel, and some babies appeared.

ROXY: so we already met huh

ROXY: and i dont even remember because i was just some idiot bb

ROXY: that aint fair!

JOHN: come to think of it, we met one other time too.

JOHN: but you were asleep.

ROXY: ??

JOHN: you were floating around in purple pajamas, and i pushed you out of the way of a flying fork.

JOHN: i almost forgot about that. but yep, that was you alright.

ROXY: you shoulda woke me up then

JOHN: i might have, but the fork stabbed me in the chest, and dream killed my sleep ghost. or something.

JOHN: you know how it is with dream logic.

ROXY: u mean how it makes lil 2 no sense ever

JOHN: yes, exactly.

JOHN: i guess i didn't think much about it at the time, but i had a sneaky suspicion that's who you were.

JOHN: you really look a lot like rose.

JOHN: she is looking for you, by the way.

ROXY: yeah?????

JOHN: she told me to go find you. and i did.

JOHN: so, she says hi.

ROXY: o man

ROXY: what else did she say

JOHN: uh.

JOHN: she said...

JOHN: she's looking forward to meeting you?

ROXY: awwwwww

ROXY: well if u see her again before i do tell her i cant wait to meet her too

ROXY: though tbh im kinda nervous about it but dont tell her that part haha

JOHN: sure!

JOHN: there's nothing to be nervous about though.

JOHN: she's just a nice nerd who likes to read and knit.

ROXY: i shouldnt be surprised to hear that

ROXY: me and all my friends are a bunch of silly nerds too

ROXY: even dirk who thinks hes 2 cool 4 school

ROXY: when in reality he is nowhere close to clearing the coolness threshold which exempts one from attending an educational institution :p

JOHN: speaking of which...

JOHN: i've been wondering where he is?

JOHN: i know jade's grandpa is in jail too, getting badgered by my evil nanna...

ROXY: u mean jake n jane

JOHN: yes, sorry.

JOHN: but i have not seen hide nor hair of dave's bro yet.

ROXY: i figured he got thrown in jail too

ROXY: although come to think of it i probly would have heard a bloody ruckus by now resulting from his inevitable escape attempt

JOHN: hmm.

ROXY: im not that worried about him though hes good at takin care of himself

ROXY: in fact i feel like all of us will be ok now that you guys are here

ROXY: but

ROXY: there is still one of my friends im worried about the most

JOHN: who?

ROXY: shes my best friend

ROXY: well ok

ROXY: i got a few best friends u know?

JOHN: yes.

ROXY: but she was always kind of a special best friend

ROXY: and last time i saw her she was in big trouble

JOHN: oh no.

JOHN: where is she?

ROXY: in the afterlife

ROXY: being dead

JOHN: ...

ROXY: her bro killed her

ROXY: which is bad enough

ROXY: but now hes out there

ROXY: hunting for her ghost

ROXY: shes doing her best to hide

ROXY: but her bro is an awful and relentless piece of shit and im afraid

ROXY: im afraid she might be already gone :(

JOHN: you're right, that is very concerning.

JOHN: who is she? would i know of her?

ROXY: dunno

ROXY: how in the loop are you on cherubs?

JOHN: oh!

JOHN: surprisingly, i know a LOT about that subject.

JOHN: for instance, did you know they turn into gigantic snakes when they have sex?

ROXY: :O

ROXY: :O

ROXY: :O

JOHN: i know. weird, right?

JOHN: that's probably not very relevant to the topic at hand, though.

ROXY: yeah prob not

ROXY: anyway u know about lord english right

JOHN: uh huh.

ROXY: ok well

ROXY: shes his sister

ROXY: her name is calliope

JOHN: ohhh.

JOHN: ok, this is starting to make sense.

ROXY: yep

ROXY: shes supposed to be critical to defeatin him somehow

ROXY: shes going on some quest out there to find a deadlier version of herself or whatever

ROXY: i dunno that could be all be true...

ROXY: and maybe its selfish of me but all i rly care about now is if shes ok??

JOHN: i understand. she is your friend.

JOHN: i would feel the same way.

ROXY: :)

JOHN: wait a minute...

JOHN: i've got it!

ROXY: got what

JOHN: i have such a good idea that would solve your problem.

ROXY: ????

JOHN: all you have to do is bring her back to life!

ROXY: how

JOHN: easy.

JOHN: i have a magic ring!

ROXY: what

ROXY: u have one too

JOHN: yes!

JOHN: wait. what do you mean too?

JOHN: you have a magic ring??

ROXY: i HAD one

ROXY: fuckin lost it though

ROXY: made peeps invisible who put it on

JOHN: ah.

JOHN: no, mine doesn't do that.

JOHN: it brings ghosts back to life!

ROXY: FUCK

ROXY: no wai

JOHN: yes wai. way.

JOHN: it's back at my house.

JOHN: i could go get it right now!

ROXY: damn son

ROXY: i find this 2 be some truly baller happenstance

ROXY: if ur claim is true im.......

ROXY: im cry :')

JOHN: it is quite true.

JOHN: it should be a piece of cake.

JOHN: you just wear it when you go to sleep, and it comes with you in your dreams.

JOHN: then you find your cherub friend, put it on her finger, and bring her back!

JOHN: i think you can only use it once though. so once she's wearing it, it would be hers forever, or at least as long as she wants it.

ROXY: yo

ROXY: yooooo

ROXY: john thats amazing

ROXY: i dunno though that sounds like

ROXY: such an obscenely precious commodity

ROXY: u sure you want to let me use it?

JOHN: sure.

JOHN: it's no big deal, really.

JOHN: for a while i was hanging on to it, thinking that i might give it to...

JOHN: aw man, this is going to sound dumb.

ROXY: hm?

JOHN: there was a girl who i was considering giving it to, for some reason.

JOHN: remember? she was the diabolical one who figured prominently in my long story.

ROXY: um

ROXY: oh yea

ROXY: fresca right

JOHN: yes, close enough.

JOHN: see, she REALLY wanted that ring.

JOHN: and she found out i had it, and...

JOHN: honestly, i'm not sure why it even crossed my mind to give it to her?

JOHN: i guess i was just used to the idea that i liked her for some reason.

JOHN: at least i thought i did.

JOHN: it was a stupid idea based on hardly anything. like one day of conversations.

JOHN: but since i've gotten to know her better...

JOHN: i don't know.

JOHN: i think i might actually...

JOHN: kind of hate her?

ROXY: yeah?

JOHN: yeah, she's...

JOHN: actually pretty awful!

JOHN: she's so full of herself, and mean to her friends, and...

JOHN: dangerous.

JOHN: really, really dangerous.

ROXY: ouch

ROXY: well what can i say john

ROXY: love sux

JOHN: yeah. it does.

JOHN: anyway, i don't think i can let anyone like that have the ring.

ROXY: but u dont mind trustin me w it?

JOHN: no!

JOHN: it's funny, after spending some time with a person who is legitimately crazy, it becomes easy to tell right away when someone...

JOHN: isn't?

ROXY: lol

ROXY: u sure about that

JOHN: well, yeah, everyone is a little crazy. i just mean not BAD crazy.

JOHN: besides, you don't even want the ring for yourself.

JOHN: you want to give it to someone you care about.

JOHN: that is what makes you one of the good guys.

ROXY: what a nice thing to say

ROXY: i bet sayin stuff like that is why ur their leader

JOHN: what makes you think i'm the leader?

ROXY: come on dude you are obvs the leader of otherkid teamsquad

ROXY: i can just tell

JOHN: haha, ok. i'll take that as a compliment.

JOHN: anyway, i'll go get the ring now.

ROXY: yay!

ROXY: ill wait here

ROXY: no need to set off the alarms with a daring escape just yet

ROXY: lets keep em lulled into a false sense of control over the sitch

ROXY: we can start scheming under their nose while u keep sneakin around undetected

ROXY: the last thing we want is for all hell to break loose before we know what were doin

JOHN: yeah, that's a good plan.

JOHN: if i had to guess, i'd say you must be the leader of your team squad too, right?

ROXY: naaaw

ROXY: that's jane

ROXY: as you can see shes the one with a knack for ruthless executive authority

ROXY: is a shame she only uses it when evil tho :(

JOHN: yeah.

JOHN: but maybe we can do something about that, if we work together.

ROXY: :D

JOHN: alright. off i go.

JOHN: keep practicing your powers!

JOHN: see you, roxy.