#Source: Superstore

[waterfire1848]

Sokka: No! Iroh and my dad left us in charge so it’s up to us to be responsible. Everyone: Sokka: I’m kidding. Obviously we’re going to have some fun.

[incorrect-bridgerton-family]

Cressida: I know we’ve always had this unspoken rivalry-

Penelope: It’s not a rivalry, you’re just always mean to me.

Penelope: And it’s not unspoken, you talk about it all the time.

[incorrectbatfam]

Diana: Clark, what was it you were complaining about yesterday? Remember?

Clark: Yeah. Why are our villains so ugly?

Bruce: No, how the Justice League keeps us under forty hours so they don’t have to give us benefits?

Clark: Oh, right, yeah. That sucks too.

[i-only-see-daylight]

Manon: Elide, your husband, Lorcan, is a loser, Aelin and I both agree.

Elide: You do?

Aelin: No, uh-uh, I never called him a loser!

Manon: Sorry, I’m the one who called him a loser. Manon: Aelin called him a clown.

[incorrectstarwarsquotess]

Anakin, on his communication device: Come on, what would you do if you were me?

Obi-Wan: If I was you, I would’ve killed myself years ago.

Anakin:

Anakin, tearing up: *voice cracking* Why do you even bother calling-

[angelofthenight]

Vance: We're not leaving this room till we figure out this whole will they, won't they, Kermit and Miss Piggy thing we got going on.

You: Wait, sorry, am I Kermit or…

Vance: Yeah, 'cause you're smart with skinny legs and I'm Miss Piggy because I'm a star.

[bwaybby09]

During a Tornado Warning:

Les: What do we do if the tornado hits us?

Spot: Uh, what do we do if the tornado hit us? I'm not sure, maybe get blown away by it?!

Race: No, no, you hide under a doorway.

Katherine: No, no, no. That's an earthquake.

Davey: Actually, they say you're not supposed to do that anymore.

Albert: Who cares what they say not to do for something that's not happening.

Jack: They say that you should go towards the eye of the storm.

Spot: Where’s the eye of the storm, Jack?

Jack: I don’t know…

Spot: That’s what I thought.

Crutchie: Tell someone you trust.

Jack: No Crutchie, that's only if the tornado's molesting you.

*bonus*

Race: Okay, this is just a drill! Everyone grab a clutch buddy!

(Race grabs onto Spot)

Spot: Oh, get off me! No!

Race: Hold on to me!

Spot: Get off me!

Race: I am saving your life!

Spot: I don’t wanna be saved by you!

[the-black-bulls]

Asta, hyping up the squad to exercise more: Getting 10,000 steps a day reduces stress, it lowers your blood pressure and increases your lifespan!

Gauche: Yeah, I don't care. I don't plan on living past 30 anyway.

Noelle: 30? You're, um, you're under 30?

Gauche: What?

Noelle: Nothing. Wow. [to Asta] I'm in, I don't want to look older than my age in my twenties.

Gauche: What?

Noelle: Nothing, nothing.

[doctorwhoincorrectquotes]

Clara: Are we gonna stand around and just point fingers or are you gonna help me fix this?

12: I was thinking we could point fingers for a few more minutes.

[incorrect-tmnt2012-quotes]

Mikey: Shut up. Sugar Logs? Do you remember Sugar Logs? Oh, I used to love these before everything had to be so damn healthy!

Donnie, reading the package: 300 grams of sugar?! A can of soda has like, 40.

Mikey, eating one: Mmmm, oh my god, so good!

Donnie: Most of these ingredients are just colors.

[waterfire1848]

[ Azula is scared of giving birth. ]

Azula: Mom, can I ask you a question?

Ursa: Of course.

Azula: When you were pregnant did you have any feelings of, I don’t know, overwhelming panic and a desire to flee.

Ursa: That’s normal with some moms. If you’re this scared, a c-section might be good. When I was in labor with Zuko I was in labor for 36 hours. I finally bit off part of my tongue and passed out.

Azula: C-Section. Ok-

Ursa: Although. You were a c-section and the healers struggled with fixing my body after they got you out.

Azula: S-struggled with fixing your body?

Ursa: Oh, yeah. They just tried shoving everything back inside me and-

Azula: No! No, absolutely not.

Ursa: Did I make it worse?

[incorrect-bridgerton-family]

Eloise, holding a crying Auggie at arms length: Hey, listen to me. You’re out of control, okay?

Eloise: You’re a baby. Your life is not that hard.

*Auggie cries louder*

Eloise: YOU’RE EMBARRASSING YOURSELF!!!

[daemon-is-perfectly-unhinged]

Rhaegar: This is a mistake.

Jon: A mistake we're gonna laugh about one day.

Rhaegar: But not today.

Jon: Oh no, today's gonna be a mess.

[cowboymephisto]

Mammon: Is something going on with you and Solomon? Asmodeus: No. What? No. Mammon: I don't know man, you guys are exchanging little peek-a-boo glances, and it's making me uncomfortable. Asmodeus: Okay. The other night, when we were all locked in at RAD Solomon kind of... came on to me. Mammon: Wow. Asmodeus: Yeah, right? Mammon: I didn't know Solomon was into fancy little porcelain doll-men.

[angelofthenight]

Tommy: Your husband Alfie’s a lunatic, Arthur and I both agree.

You: You do?

Arthur: No, uh-uh, I did never call him a lunatic!

Tommy: Sorry, I think I’m the one who called him a lunatic.

Tommy: Arthur called him a clown.

[amazing-spiderlad]

Vaggie: Super mario is an offensive Italian stereotype

Lucifer: What? That's ridiculous... Let's ask Angel, he's Italian- Hey man, super mario is okay, right?

Angel: I've actually thought a lot about this- Mario bros? Amazing. Mario kart? Great. Mario party? It's like- what happened?