#So it’s important to be careful with what we create

[aihoshiino]

chapter 161 thoughts

Chapters Since The 143 Kiss Happened And Went Entirely Unacknowledged And Unaddressed Count: 18

Aqua Hoshigan Status: For the future

Never has an OnK chapter gone from It's Hoshinover to We Are Oshi no Back quite as hard and fast as this one. I have issues with this chapter in terms of what it implies about the story's overall structure and the fact that it sort of ruins 153-4 by association but this chapter's back half is so fucking good and the chapter itself works so well in isolation that much like 153-4, I kind of uhhh don't care about the structural issues because the story's heart is, for the most part, not just intact but beating harder and more passionately than it has in a long time.

To get what I don't like out of the way, the story seems to have settled on Super Evil Serial Killer Mastermind Kamiki as his final form characterization with some helpful Tsukuyomi exposition to just straightforwardly Tell Us things the manga probably should have spent some of the last 70something chapters Showing Us about Hikaru. The basic idea of Hikaru being some sort of serial killer so dedicated to upholding Ai's legacy that he kills women with the potential to surpass her was more or less always where I expected his character to land and this settling of his character does at least preserve what I think is the most important thing: that he genuinely loved Ai and his bent towards villainy only came after her death.

What I don't love as much is that this chapter seems to continue leaning into Uber God Manipulator Mastermind Kamiki like last chapter. I already talked at length about my issues with this framing in my previous chapter review so all I'll reiterate here is that the story's attempt to frame Hikaru as being equally or even more culpable for the actions of Nino and Ryosuke fall entirely flat to me, especially when the manga itself does such a pisspoor job of actually explaining how or why Kamiki was able to control and/or predict their actions to the extent that he supposedly did. And ESPECIALLY especially given that Nino and Ryosuke seem to have already been dangerously obsessed with Ai by the time they approached him.

In general, Hikaru's character is honestly just so inconsistent at this point that making any sense of his actions feels fruitless. If I really dig into what's going on, I can infer that maybe he fell into the same trap as Aqua by overcompensating for his trauma-induced helplessness by becoming overly controlling and guess that his fucked up trauma response to Ai's death combined with those terrible words Kindaichi gave him at Airi's funeral lead him down he road he's traveling now. I can even extrapolate that Aqua showing him the DVD message in 153-4 pushed Hikaru to this extreme and now that he has nothing to lose, he's lashing out at his children too - though, it should be noted, that the manga still hasn't actually established what Hikaru's culpability is in Nino's attempt on Ruby's life, outside of Aqua saying "well you didn't use your psychic powers to perfectly predict nino's actions so it's on you".

But like - this is all stuff I'm having to infer and extrapolate and guess, reverse engineering logic from our end point in an attempt to create a stable foundation for this characterization. The manga has done such a poor job of properly establishing Hikaru both as an antagonistic force and as a consistent character that I feel like I'm trying to assemble a coherent image from two different puzzle sets with all the fucking corner pieces missing and that's with Crow Girl looking into the camera and Explaining Him to me.

And listen, I am a bitch who LOVES to infer things. One of my absolute favourite pieces of fiction of all time ever is Umineko no Naku Koro Ni, a mystery story that literally does not contain any straightforwardly explicit, textual confirmation of the culprit's identity or motives because it believes so strongly that you, the reader, are smart enough and empathetic enough to put in the time and effort necessary to understand it regardless and it deeply, deeply values being able to give you that experience. But OnK feels less like it's intentionally encouraging me to think hard and enjoy the process of putting my head and my heart to work - it feels like it's leaving its homework unfinished and letting the reader do the actual hard work of sewing up the internal logic.

I probably won't talk much more about Kamiki this chapter cos I'd just be saying all this shit over and over but I really just am struggling to understand from a perspective of authorial intent what the vibe is even supposed to be. Like I mentioned in a previous ask, if this is where Kamiki's arc is reaching its conclusion then it means that the Movie Arc was essentially a whole-ass waste of time in and out of universe. Blech. Hate that.

Also, before I move on, I don't want to leave this just implied - making Kamiki explicitly a CSA victim and then ending his arc on Aqua (and implicitly the narrative) dismissing him as being too broken/corrupted to be saved is a really major misstep that I think represents a huge black mark on OnK's handling of CSA as a topic. The idea of an eternal defilement or an unfixable core wrongness in the self is already something real life CSA victims struggle with in the process of unpacking their trauma and having our likable and supposedly morally superior protagonist espouse this unchallenged in a work as prominent and relevant as Oshi no Ko is irresponsible bordering on dangerous. It's incredibly disappointing that after all the care Aka and Mengo seemingly took in handling this topic that it was whiffed so badly at the last second.

ANYWAY!!! Now all the beef's been dealt with, we can cleanse our palettes and move onto everything else I liked which was… basically everything else in this chapter!

Admittedly, Aqua's overall arc is still suffering from us being kicked out of his head from like 123 onwards for no real apparent reason and while 150 was a welcome refresher on where he's at in this part of the story, it still feels a bit like the story is prioritizing preserving the surprise factor of its twists over making these surprises feel earned. Compare it to volume 1 - you are basically told exactly what is going to happen to Ai, especially in the manga when Saitou and Gotanda outright say as much - but her death is still incredibly impactful and upsetting. I think this chapter is very effective, but could've been a lot moreso if we'd spent more time in Aqua's head leading up to it.

THAT SAID… If the intention of keeping us out of his head was to recontextualize Aqua's behaviour across the past ten or so chapters in this new light, I don't hate it as much as I might have. I initially took issue with what felt like the story off-screening and not addressing the resolution to Aqua's suicidal ideation so whipping back around to prove that it was still very much present puts some particular Aqua moments over this past volume into a very different light. As some people pointed out, Aqua missing Kana's pitch - literally dropping the ball in responding to her feelings - and his wide-eyed look of alarm in 151 seemed very ominous omens for the success of her confession and that beat of him covering his face when Kana approves of his dream… very incheresting knowing Aqua was still struggling with 'love or revenge' at this point.

Most interesting of all to reconsider is Aqua breaking down in tears in Miyako's arms in 155 when she addresses him as her son for the first time. At the time it read like catharsis but now I can't help but wonder if this was Aqua grieving for something he desperately wants but thinks is out of his reach.

i do have to say though. i get the general vibe of this plan and think it works fine as the apex of aqua's self-sacrificial protectiveness for the people he loves but how is being the daughter of a serial killer somehow any less scandalous for her career than being the sister of someone who killed one dude. does aqua think they just won't notice that kamiki happens to be their biodad or something. wasn't that the whole point of the movie. goofy ass plan.

What really saves this whole scenario is the emotions at play, though. This really does feel like Aqua at his most Aqua in a really long while and this chapter has so much love and respect for his life as Aqua and the bonds he has formed as a result. The dreams Aqua lays out are so agonizingly simple, too - he wants to pursue the career he finds rewarding. He wants to date the girl he likes. He wants to accept Miyako as his mom and Himekawa as his brother and to make things right with Akane after hurting and using her. He wants to see Ruby achieve her dream and be there to support her when she does.

But Aqua's always considered his dreams impossible, hasn't he?

I fully admit; I got spoiled with the full page spread of Aqua stabbing himself way in advance of the chapter and initially hated it as a twist. But with the full chapter as context and the sheer weight of Aqua's longing to just fucking live and find joy, it's not just effective but absolutely gutwrenching. It is the synthesis of Aqua's series-long battle to choose love or revenge and it resonates perfectly because it has never been one or the other for him - Aqua's revenge has always been rooted in the fact that he loves others so wholly and completely and hates himself so utterly that he thinks sacrificing himself to preserve their futures is the only path for him to take. It's the culmination and final release of the suicidal ideation Aqua has been dealing with since he was four years old and like Ai's tragedy before him, there's a horrible sense that maybe there really was no other way this could've gone.

Aqua being the character who actually takes the knife also firmly cements him as Ai's narrative echo in the text which has me barkin and howlin because it's what I've been saying all this time. Not just that, but so many of Aqua's expressions in this chapter pointedly and deliberately echo Ai's after she was stabbed. Not just that, but Aqua's achingly simple dreams echo Ai's own heartrendingly simple regrets - all the two of them ever wanted was to be happy with the people they love.

This also reframes the story's prior establishment of Ruby as paralleling Ai and seems to place the twins in the position of echoing not Ai in her entirety but Ruby as 'Ai of B-Komachi' and Aqua as 'Ai Hoshino'. This was actually something I outlined in one of my very first meta posts on the series, but I think making it more specific to 'Ruby as Ai the idol' and 'Aqua as Ai the human', this actually gives Ruby's arc in relation to Ai a bit of breathing room. Don't get me wrong, everything I've said about her post-BH writing being underbaked and inconsistent is still the case, especially when it comes to how confused the story is on whether Ruby is her own idol or New And Improved Ai 2.0 but giving it less ground to cover helps in terms of her writing no longer being spread quite as thin.

Speaking of Ruby, that beat of her seeming to react or sense something is up the moment Aqua takes the stab. 'Something happened to my loved one far away and I just Feel It' is a trope I'm always a sucker for and I really dig it here.

"The public don't care about the truth, so let's tell them a lie" is such a crazy hard sentiment to go out on too. Holy fuck.

There go our boys…!!! Quite a few people predicted they might go over the edge when Aqua showed up in his Mephisto fit (Mefitsto) and I'm interested to see if we get any parallels to the ED's imagery in the next few chapters. Overall, though, I'm really excited for where things are going - I don't think Aqua will die, but I do have some theories about what might happen. I can't think of a more traditional misogi purification experience than the middle of the ocean in late December, after all…

No break next week! Woohoo! While the delay of episode 12 means we won't be getting them on the same day, that is the same week S2 of the anime will be concluding and Aka does like lining up his bombshells with the anime. So who knows what we'll see.

seriously tho aqua. everyone already knows kamiki is you and ruby's biodad. HOW IS THIS ANY BETTER THAN HER BEING THE DAUGHTER OF A SERIAL KILLER AS IT ALREADY STANDS

[districtscare]

the hunger games, for all its adroit, nuanced storytelling about capitalism and how it crushes those under it by the heel, oppression, war, death, cruelty, love, and the means of power and how those equipped with it do wrong, — even after seeing how it burns a hole in society, also gives you room to root for and care for a minority that is not often thought about, and is continually showcased in media as one of the most villainized types addiction. alcoholism.

through collin's portrayal of haymitch, she paints a picture of a man who we'd supposedly find lazy, writhing in his pathetic nature at the hands of — what? we don't learn right away. haymitch is sharply presented as the only living victor of district 12, the maudlin, roguish pariah who is consistently deluged in the throes of inebriation. his entrance is unattractive and far from pretty as his drunken way leads him to babble what we think is incoherency, the mouth of a drunk is an unsmart one — until we get, “she's got spunk! more than you! more than you!” and he's pointing at the capitol's cameras. katniss says here,

“Is he addressing the audience or is he so drunk he might actually be taunting the Capitol?”

this right here is our first clue on haymitch being in the rebellion, and of his intelligence. many would think of this as a throwaway line, but for what comes later? it is significantly important. moving through the story, haymitch as a mentor is harsh, sharp-tongued and equally hard-fisted after katniss and peeta end up having to near-attack him in order to earn his mentorship.

realizing their potential, a sliver of his story is already told. swayed simply by action, and not pleas, haymitch (as katniss eventually says,) was likely a mentor who dedicated himself to seeing his tributes’ success, each time with no avail. what we as a reader, and katniss as a narrator is yet to find out until catching fire, that it's one of the most correct statements about himself. disproving the lazy, dissmissive stereotypes, almost immediately does haymitch jump into action in order to benefit katniss and peeta, sobering up enough to keep clear minded (which is already a feat under the influence,) and giving genuine, life-saving advice.

their win is due to the advantage of the year — stylists with an eye of precision in which create a glowing impression of the tributes, but it also all comes down to haymitch's compliance as a mentor, and how his ability to get sponsors is doubled in comparison to former years. he is the first to have 2 tributes, after 46 passed in prior years during his consistent solo mentoring, equally win the hunger games within the same year, although displeased to put them through that suffering.

haymitch’s flaws don't just stem from his addiction, they do come as a result of trauma. closed-off and stoic, he objects himself to a life of depravity — both coming from his victory during the premise of the 50th hunger games and second quarter quell, or even a long while after. able to piece together the way he not only outsmarted the likes of 47 people in arena where the odds were double, haymitch's surface layer peels off to show the claw marks in which his life experiences have wounded him with, which only becomes apparent due to the third quarter quell and his fellow victors, including katniss and peeta returning to the arena. his depravity comes from constant grief, constant losses, constant failure.

[mychemisgay]

Yuji, the main character of the story is the son of Kenjaku (big bad mastermind of the series) and part of Sukuna's soul (final big bad in the series). These seem like important plot points, right? Wrong, they go exactly nowhere.

If you think about it, the story would've been the exact same if Yuji was just an unusually strong human. He gets told he's a really good vessel for Sukuna, most other people probably wouldn't be able to contain him, but no one, not even Yuji questions why that is. It's just accepted at the start, so they start feeding him the fingers. No one thinks it's kinda suspicious how strong he was even as a non-sorcerer. Literally no one cares, it's just accepted in the manga, quirky main character syndrome I guess.

Then why make these interesting plot points about his parents as one off remarks? The reader gets baited into thinking these will all tie together, then gets blue balled.

Why did Sukuna mention towards the end of the whole manga, that Yuji was made from part of his soul (his would-be twin that he consumed before birth) and that Kenjaku wouldn't make a kid for no reason? We could see Sukuna hated being in Yuji so what was Kenjaku's plan? As soon as he could Sukuna dipped and posessed Megumi instead. So what even was Kenjaku's plan with creating Yuji? Even Sukuna said he doesn't fucking know, and that's where we as readers are left at.

Also, we got the conversation with Yorozu, Sukuna told her she could do whatever with him if he lost. What was the point of that out-of-place conversation in the middle of a mediocre fight? Logically it could have been foreshadowing as to what will happen when Sukuna is actually defeated in the series.

When Sukuna lost against Yuji, he could have done anything with his body, and with Yuji wanting to help him, he probably should have eaten him. Even the deal they made in Yuji's domain went something like "give back Fushiguro and come back to me OR I will kill you." Sukuna gave back Megumi, so by that logic he should have gone back to Yuji, probably by Yuji eating him. But no. Nothing comes from this at all, he just fucking dies.

Man, Gege is the true potential man (gn).

[hugemilkshake]

Just thought of something funny based off an artwork someone did but I don't know where it is so imma just day joke...this is based off the fact that gingerbrave and dark enchantress both know the reasons why cookies were baked buuuut aren't telling anyone. Btw this is a full parody so it isn't word for word for gingerbrave and dark enchantress.

Dark enchantress: I know why we are created but I'm not telling. >:)

Gingerbrave: I know why we were created to but I'm not caring...I'm also not telling.

Y/n, being naive or stupid or whichever is funnier: I KNOW WHY WE ARE MADE AND IM GONNA TELL EVERYONE! HEY Y'ALL-

*Gingerbrave and dark enchantress both run over to y/n and cover their mouth it shoves a treat into their mouth.*

Both of them: SHUTUPSHUTUPSHUTUP!

My point...a new type of y/n but idk what to call that y/n lol: a y/n who is like a young child learning a cussword except secrets instead of cusswords...like they won't blurt out personal secrets of cookies but generalized secrets about why cookies were made aaaaaand how dark enchantress is white lily! Like can fully imagine during the scene at the meeting of the ancients with Clotted cream, y/n is the one to blurt out the white lily thing like:

Clotted cream: you don't even realize that one of you has already-

Y/n: Wait, are we talking about the thing about dark enchantress being white lily?

Pure vanilla: *looks horrified* Y/N, NO!

Clotted cream: 0-0

Hollyberry: y/n, not again!!!

Enjoy the milkshake! Reader is basically just a troll

Reader who can’t keep secrets

-platonic-

After spilling a bit to many secrets you’ve not been invited to any important events like meetings since you can’t keep any secrets

Like your a kid so you can’t help it but still

Sometimes it’s shocking how you know some of this

Like you are an enigma

You are slightly feared

But your just a kid so it’s chill

[azrielgreen]

random question, but why Nebraska? I live in the US and often forget Nebraska even exists, but you happen to have two stories set there. Do you have a connection to Nebraska, or did you just choose a state at random in the middle of the country? Or do you find something poetic about the expansive nothingness of the Cornhusker state?

just curious.

So, it's really strange but Nebraska holds a deep emotional meaning in my heart that involves Ethel Cain, Billy Hargrove and 'Rooms'. Apologies for the little ramble ahead, but for those who enjoy such things, gather round.

When I first started writing Rooms, I was experiencing a lot of burnout, very much questioning myself as a writer and also recovering still from a near death experience. I had made a new friend who became such an important and beautiful part of my life, and it was in this time of loss, self-doubt and awakening that I felt comfortable enough to share with my new friend that I loved the character Billy Hargrove. This sounds so stupid even as I'm writing it now, but I had been made to feel that liking him was this extremely taboo thing and that I should be ashamed of it. Even a former friend I thought I was close with often made me feel terrible for liking him. My new friend was not like that. We talked for hours and hours about the things we liked, and I felt brave enough to admit that of all the characters, every single one, in ST, Billy is my favourite. My friend was kind and open and supportive and it was here, around this time that we started writing a story together that would later become Prism and coming up with all these incredible ideas and perspectives I had never considered. Although people credit me with much of Prism Eddie's creation and expansion, always remember it is @thorniest-rose who invented him.

This is when I wrote Rooms.

This is also the time I discovered Ethel fucking Cain.

A House in Nebraska and Sun Bleached Flies altered my DNA and I listened to them both back to back on a loop while writing Rooms. It became something so meaningful and personal and beautiful, and all three are tangled up together. Inextricable connections between these things I love so much and at the heart of it all, is Nebraska. I've never been to Nebraska, but I imagine it to be exactly as you said. The great, vast nothingness, the absence of any significant pull to visit or tour there. It's sort of branded into me, the line about 'I'm still praying for that house in Nebraska, by the highway on the edge of town,' and it's all tangled up with Billy Hargrove and the possibilities of an abused kid making good, coming through the other side, learning and growing. Longing for this quiet, no man's land of blue skies and endless horizon. I would often dream of such things myself. Just a house. Somewhere I was safe. And I wrote all this at a time when I met someone I came to love and care about so much in mutual support and kindness, and it's why Rooms is gifted to her.

Opening yourself up to new things is such a beautiful and important phenomenon, especially when you're grieving or recovering. Rooms to me is a touchstone of reassurance that I can write whatever the fuck I want and anyone who tries to tell me different is not my friend. Nebraska has become an almost nebulous place in my mind and heart, to the point I get excited when I hear anyone even mention it in passing. I think we put meaning where we need to, anthropomorphising and humanising and telling stories to get through the hard parts of life. Nebraska is the core of that for me. Synonymous with self-acceptance, growth, positive change, releasing what doesn't serve, embracing who you are, saying fuck you to those who would police your joy and creating whatever the fuck you want without needing it to be liked, but also this deeply sad part of myself that acknowledges what I went through as a child and what I experienced at the hands of people who were supposed to take care of me. I have at this point in my life lost a huge amount of my childhood memories all the way up to my late twenties. Nebraska is the long distance friend I never had, the moon watching over me, the place I go to in my mind to make it all go quiet and calm. I feel like I've written this huge story around a place I've never been to and for some reason, it just stuck hard.

Like many British kids growing up watching America on our screens, I always wanted to live there and although I'm now glad I don't, I'll always be in love with the country and all her patchwork quilt states, these weird little lands sewn together that are so different, almost like a world unto itself. I never choose a state randomly, but Nebraska is laden with meaning and woven with feeling, all of which I'm sure seems massively unearned as I'm just another person who grew up in a rainy country, longing for blue skies, with a tendency to love abandoned things.

Thank you for asking.

All my love, Az

💜💜💜

[sunnyshinesunshine]

Okay so I’ve finally solidified my opinion on The Rings of Power and given that it is my opinion it is therefore very important and I’m sure everyone is dying to hear it (this is sarcasm)

I’ll start by saying I’m not a critical person when it comes to things. I consume media to enjoy myself, not to pick apart its literary or thematic flaws. It’s fine if you do, but that’s just not me.

I will also say I’ve never read the Fall of Númenor as its own story, so any Tolkien primary sources I’m vaguely alluding to (this isn’t a research paper been there done that got the high school diploma I bake cookies for a living I ain’t citing shit thanks <3) are the Silmarillion, LoTR, and The Hobbit.

I didn’t like TROP for the first season, but after catching up on S2, I’ve come to enjoy it.

S1 is the full of world building, setting up the political stage and the relationships between the characters that lead to the creation of the rings and all the other bad hullabaloo that ends in the Last Alliance.

Safe to say, I spent the whole time going ‘what? why is he/she/them saying/believing/acting like this? why is it/this portrayed like this???’ and felt very irked by the whole thing.

S2, the rings are being created, familiar events start happening, the puzzle pieces from S1 that were so unfamiliar and bothersome to me then come together to create a picture that I knew.

Once I got to thinking I realized I actually know a whole lot less about the fall of numenor and the creation of the rings than I thought I did.

When Tolkien writes about those events, he gives the broad strokes in a very history-book way. Celebrimbor creates the rings because he is deceived by Sauron. Tar-Míriel is overthrown by Ar-Pharazôn and marries him against his will. Elrond is with Gil-Galad as his herald.

These are the things, amongst others, that we know. Unlike in the Hobbit or LoTR, we aren’t given any glimpses into the heads or relationships of the characters in anything other than what amounts to almost a timeline of events.

This, of course, leaves a lot of room for Tolkien fans to ask questions. Questions that can be answered through imagination. Imagination becomes ideas, ideas become discussions, discussions become a collective understanding of what happened (fanon*. I’m talking fanon. please read the note at the end because I think fanon is awesome and deserves to be defended)

For example. We know Celebrimbor and Narvi built the Doors of Durin together and added possibly the most ridiculous riddle password possible.

When the Doors are first introduced in LoTR, it is also in the middle of Gimli and Legolas’ semi feuding, and before both of them have some serious moments regarding their histories and cultures (Khazad-Dûm and Lothlórien respectively).

All of this to conclude that at some point between Gigolas’s inter-species feuding and the password to the damn doors being ‘mellon’, as Tolkien fans, we came to the conclusion that Celebrimbor and Narvi were close friends.

Celebrimbor and Narvi are not really much more than acquaintances in TROP. And that isn’t inaccurate. The source material doesn’t have an opinion on it really.

Fanon says Celebrimbor and Narvi were pals. TROP says they weren’t. Canon doesn’t care either way.

I mention this example to explain why TROP felt so wrong especially at the beginning. Essentially we, or at least I, had this idea of how things should be, and when TROP diverged from that I felt lost and annoyed.

Now, I find watching TROP to be honestly kind of fascinating, like watching someone else painting using a model and comparing it to the painting I had already created of that same model.

It’s kind of fun. And every Elrond deserves all of us cheering him on.

*about Fanon:

I love fanon it’s awesome and great and it’s fucking collective story telling in a way that hasn’t really existed in modern times. Thousands of people from all over the world create and agree and discuss and add on to stories. The marauders fandom is almost completely fanon and that’s wonderful. Every single one of you who share your ideas about characters or settings or clothes or even (especially) who create the elleths who exist in the Silmarillion but don’t at the same time, you are awesome.

You’ve created a story and world together. Without being paid. You’ve agreed and created simply for the love of creation. And that’s so amazing.

Fanon is awesome and I don’t care for anyone who calls it cringe.

[sapphicseagoat]

Ruminations on Saturn

As a Saturnian person, it has taken a long time to embrace the lessons that Saturn has consistently tried to teach me. The responsibility of Saturn certainly makes it feel as though it's not an enjoyable part of your life to partake in.

Saturn is stability. Many of the things that we take for granted are Saturnian. The stability that comes from building the underlying support structure of your life, especially early in life when it is often built for you, makes it easy to not think about it. Stability is a state that you don't have to think about until it's gone or disrupted.

Saturn is diligence. It is the feeling of looking forward at your life & it feeling insurmountable, like you don't know where to start. But when you do & you work consistently, it goes by quicker & easier than you expected. It is the joy of routine - of understanding that routine & diligence builds a form of power. It is the art of being thorough, working to the point where you learn about every crack & crevice, & understanding deep intricacies that are only learned through experience.

Saturn is neglect. The flip side of diligence. Saturn compels us to acknowledge the things that we need to be diligent & consistent in working on - but if those things are instead neglected, you might not notice a difference at first. Sometimes things degrade so slowly that it never feels as if it's change day to day, but it is. & when that neglect builds, it can become catastrophic if left unchecked.

Saturn is boundaries. Boundaries require diligence. They are a day-in, day-out negotiation of learning about someone else, their boundaries, & also enforcing your own. Knowing what, ultimately infringes upon your self & being. Boundaries are not a one-time event. But, once again, if neglected, you shrink yourself in your relationships & aren't able to display your true essence. Saturn provides the protective boundaries needed to be yourself.

Saturn is slow, Saturn is methodical, Saturn is cold, & Saturn is unforgiving. Listen to Saturn.

Saturn is transition. It is the small changes day by day that we adjust to. The ones that add up, making us look back at our lives 3 years ago, & realizing that we couldn't imagine it anymore even if we wanted to. It is the realization that change will always occur, & our structures of support are integral in helping us adapt to that change.

Saturn is the endless passage of time. Knowing that nothing will be forever, knowing that we are insignificant in the grand scheme of things, but also knowing that your commitment is what builds a legacy that changes the course of history. The power of routine builds over time, creating generational change through diligence & consistency. Saturn rewards this type of behavior, reminding us that the responsibility we feel for ourselves is important and helpful to make our lives better & more stable. That stability provides the foundation on which we can change the world.

None of the accomplishments we see & learn about coming from other people are done in a day - they are a result of the Saturnian pull - a need to contribute a legacy, to look beyond ourselves at generational change. It is slow, it is methodical, it is cold in nature. But don't let the coldness of Saturn fool you. That coldness is needed in order to think about how to contribute to the world in a loving, & caring manner.

[sketchingstars03]

tbh, on the topic of ink’s memory??? so many people use it for humor or angst for others because he forgot them, and i get it! but. but as someone who struggles with their own memory, i can say that realizing you forgot something a minute or even a few seconds after saying it or thinking of it is humiliating, if not devastating, depending on what’s going on or even how i’m feeling in the moment (because sometimes it can be the straw that breaks the camel’s back, you know?). it doesn’t feel funny, it just makes me feel like shit and like an idiot, and i can’t help wondering if half of the reason ink brushes off his bad memory so much and in the way he does is to try and suppress that.

it probably doesn’t help that so many people use it as an excuse to call him an idiot (even though, given his… well, everything, he’s probably forgotten more than most of the multiverse has learned combined). his memory being bad doesn’t mean he’s stupid! it doesn’t make him incompetent or an asshole! it’s just something that sucks that he has to deal with and and i really doubt he enjoys it.

idk, maybe i’m overreacting or getting to emotional, it just. hurts, i guess, to have a shit memory and have other people make fun of you for it or roll their eyes like they think you’re lying. also i just really love ink-

I don’t think you’re overreacting at all Anon. It’s reasonable to feel hurt in a situation like this, seeing the way others react to a character you relate to and can see yourself in.

And you’re right. Ink isn’t stupid or an asshole for being forgetful (nobody is <3). It’s outside of his control. He loves learning new things, he’s a smart guy! I definitely think that Ink’s memory problems deserve to be explored more than just for a gag or angst purposes. I absolutely plan on putting more thought into my portrayals that’s for certain.

But yeah, I think he probably doesn’t like it when people think he’s an idiot just cause he’s forgetful. Thank you sm for your insight! If this is too personal I can delete this answer if you want.

[fortes-fortuna-iogurtum]

I've been reading Exodus lately and I've just gotten to the portions where God gives the first commands to the people via Moses (twice), and then goes on to give detailed instructions about the tabernacle and how it should be built, and I'm just... we think art is unimportant?? we think things only mean as much as their functionality?? we so easily fall into the trap of believing that beauty means nothing, that it's cheap and only worth whatever mindless distraction it brings, that it's barely more than a cheap sensual thrill, that buildings should just be practical and plain and cheap, that everything should be functional but ultimately disposable, that paintings and dresses and mugs and curtains and carpets are just pretty but have no real value, that beauty is fleeting and vain and therefore shouldn't be thought about too much, if even looked for at all... we fall into these traps so easily, and we forget that there are chapters upon chapters of painstakingly detailed plans to build one portable worship tent, and those plans have been handed down through thousands of years of human history, because beauty and art and skill in craft is important

[aroaessidhe]

2024 reads / storygraph

Outdrawn

f/f contemporary romance

two cartoonist who’ve been rivals since uni, and now have competing webcomics online, have to work together on the relaunch of a cult classic at the comic press they both work at

they both struggle with art-related physical and mental health issues, and complicated families

[stellerssong]

ok sorry the OTHER thing about lucienne is like. as previously stated she is dream's handpicked emissary from the waking world to the dreaming she's the diplomat in chief she's the translator she's the bridge. because the dreaming is, in a very real way, dream's own psyche, this is tantamount to giving lucienne a tremendous degree of access to his interiority and by transitive property also tantamount to entering into a deeply emotionally intimate relationship with her (unimportant for the purposes of this post whether that relationship is platonic or romantic).

now, in general, looking at the pattern of dream's close emotional relationships—dream doesn't share himself with people as a rule (beyond the access that all things that live have to the dreaming; but i'm talking about his self here, the one he doesn't like to acknowledge he even has), but when he does share with people, it's with people who have some shadow on the soul, so to speak. just looking at attested relationships in show canon, his deepest emotional connection seems to be with death, who embodies the duality of light and dark even better than he does himself. calliope is the muse of epic poetry—heroism and tragedy—and also bears the sort of divine pride that led her to cut dream off for hundreds or thousands of years when he wronged her. the less said about that other guy, the better, but he's no sunshine-rainbows-unicorns type—he's a soldier of fortune, a bandit and a killer, a man who profits from the sale of human life. even best bird matthew, in comix canon, had a sordid past that will maybe be partially retconned for the show but has still been gestured at.

dream likes the complicated ones. he's drawn to them. they speak to something in him that he won't acknowledge in himself (he has to be Whole, fully integrated, without reservation, because he is the king and he is the dreaming and if the dreaming ain't whole then the universe is in trouble—but he feels that ache nonetheless).

all that is to say: when people try to portray lucienne as dream's Designated Well-Adjusted Neurotypical Friend, i begin to harm and maim.

[mabaris]

alright so now that we’ve gotten some actual crumbs, it feels like it’s a good time to lay out my prediction for what da4 is going to look like. writing this in a letter and mailing it to myself

we are part of an underground organization formed from the ruins of the inquisition to stop solas from ending the world

meanwhile the wardens have been researching the blight/the location of the archdemons and discover some secret about the location of the black city/what is actually contained in it

we’re supposed to be shocked at the reveal that the evanuris are trapped in the black city and the maker doesn’t exist

the ancient elves were in control of some crazy mutating technology (like in hormak) and that was the original source of the darkspawn. the whole thing about them being from the deep roads and a dwarf concern was actually just a red herring, they’re just underground because they’re powered by lyrium and this has ALSO been an elf thing the whole time :)

anyway, now we need to Double Make Sure the veil stays up because the evanuris have something even worse cooking up in the black city and we need to prevent them from unleashing a super blight and destroying all life, and our job is to convince solas to give up, not because we disagree with his plan but because his actions will have unintended consequences. even if he doesn’t care about everyone else and wants to rebuild the world, he won’t even be able to do THAT because the super blight will kill elves too. so although we WERE enemies we will have to band together to defeat the greater threat etc. it will be optional to recruit him as an ally/advisor, or you can just fight him directly and take control of his forces

we will have to cross into the fade AGAIN and storm the black city directly to put a stop to whatever’s going on in there

[purplelea]

I see people getting enthusiastic about the player polycule but will they still be there when I'll start talking about JoshBeat, BeatShiki and Joshiki? not so sure. a shame since those three ships are extremely interesting as well

[nightshadeowl]

11 for the artist asks

11. Favorite comment you've ever received on your work?

I said the Reddit Monet comment last time I did one of these (which is true, I do really love that one) and right now I feel like showing off just a smidge so I'm gonna say the time Scar QRTed me.

[orcelito]

I've kinda been existing in the realm of "everyone I know is going to die, many sooner than I expect" for the past few years. Considering. Ykno. But I don't register that's not the norm most of the time. I lived 22 years of my life not experiencing proper grief, after all. Only a few people I barely knew had died. No one I was ever close with.

One of the first things my new therapist said when greeting me (after having reviewed the preliminary questionnaire I filled out) was something about how sorry she was at my unimaginable loss. And I just had a moment of like. Huh. No, it really Isn't normal to lose 6 members of my family and 2 cats in the span of 5 years. No, that isn't normal at all.

I hope I don't have to experience any more unexpected losses anytime soon. I'd like to have faith in people's permanence in my life again.

[goldentigerfestival]

boy does Fluri make me feel things. a lot of things. i love. them.