#Remus loves books

[lulublack90]

Prompt 3 - Library

@wolfstarmicrofic June 3, word count 904

Previous part First part

The arts and crafts hadn’t been that bad. Remus thought it had probably been designed for younger campers, but each of the inhabitants of Gryffindor cabin now sported a red and gold woven friendship bracelet. 

“Shall we do the tour?” Sirius asked James. 

“Might as well,” James replied, looking at his watch. “We’ve still got about an hour until dinner.” 

“Where should we start?” Peter said, standing up from tying his shoelaces. 

“We’ll start with the boring and end with the good stuff.” Sirius grinned, grabbing Remus’s hand and leading him away from the main hall. Remus’s stomach flipped, and he willed his palms not to get sweaty. 

“This is the storeroom, don’t bother trying to get in, it’s really boring,” Sirius declared, not stopping. “There’s the kitchen. If you get hungry, the cooks are lovely and will make you something between meals, but don’t let Albus or Minnie catch you, because they will give you chores, and you do not want to do the chores,” Remus grinned, beginning to enjoy himself. “Then there’s the library,” Remus planted his feet at that one.

“A library?!” He asked excitedly. 

“Oh, don’t tell me you’re one of those,” Sirius rolled his eyes, but took Remus inside anyway. 

It was small but had a good selection of books. There were books on local flora and fauna, local hiking paths, emergency first aid books, but also novels. It was Remus’s turn to drag Sirius this time, as neither of them let go. 

Remus ran his fingers across the spines of the books in front of him and picked a few to pull off the shelves. 

“Can I take these with me now or should I come back?” He looked to Sirius, as he seemed to have taken over the tour. A crooked smile spread across Sirius’s face.

“You can get them now,” Remus’s face lit up. He picked up three and let Sirius lead him over to the stern-looking librarian.  “Irma, my sweet forest flower, how are you this morning?” Sirius crooned at the scowling middle-aged woman. 

“It is Madam Pince and you know it, Mr Black. Do not make me tell McGonagall on you.” She narrowed her eyes at the books in Remus’s hand. “What do you want?”

“Remus, here wants to take some books out. He appears to be a bit of a bookworm. Should have guessed really, he looks like a bookworm.” Sirius teased. Remus quietly handed the books over to Madam Pince. 

“You’ll need to fill out this form before you can take them.” She said, passing Remus a sheet of paper asking for his name, date of birth and address. “If you lose or damage a book you will be expected to replace it.” Remus nodded. He’d have to be careful, his dad would blow a gasket if he had to pay for new books that Remus wouldn’t even be keeping. 

“Yes Madam Pince,” He said politely. 

“Hmmm,” She grunted at them. She peered at Remus's form, but unable to find anything wrong with it, she made a note of the books Remus wanted to borrow and handed them over. 

When they came out of the quietness of the library it was to shouting and swearing. 

Peter and James were rolling around on the grass, wrestling. 

“Oi, you two, pack it in. Let’s finish this up, Remus wants to read his books.” When they didn’t listen, Sirius let go of Remus’s hand and launched himself on top of James and Peter. The shouting intensified until Sirius managed to separate them. They were all laughing and joking. Remus relaxed as he realised they’d been messing about and not actually fighting. “Right back to the tour!” Sirius exclaimed as he took Remus’s hand again and dragged him to the next stop.  

“That’s the dock, that’s the boathouse and, obviously, that’s the lake. I’ll tell you about the monster that dwells in the depths of it later.” Sirius grinned wildly at Remus over his shoulder. “Okay, next is make out point.”

“Yeah, but it’s pretty useless until the girls come over for the dance,” Peter groaned. “It’s got a nice view when it doesn’t have couples all over it,” Peter added. Remus looked down at his and Sirius’s entwined hands and gulped. Sirius caught him looking and waggled his eyebrows, making Remus blush from his head to his toes. He tried to pull his hand away, but Sirius held it tightly, not letting him let go. Remus had no idea what that meant. He had to force his brain to not start picking that apart now.

“And finally, my most favourite place in the entire camp. Our den.” Sirius pulled Remus through a line of trees and into a tiny circle with a ring of logs to sit on. It felt very enclosed as the surrounding trees had almost woven together, forming a shelter of sorts.

Sirius led him over to a log and pulled him down next to him. James and Peter came and sat opposite them. Sirius let go of his hand and leant backwards, moving a few rocks out of the way and picking up a small metal box. “And this is what we do in our den.” He opened the box and inside was a lighter, a pouch of loose tobacco, papers and a small baggy of green buds. Remus instantly knew what this little group got up to in their den. 

Next part

[professor-geen-berries]

Remus, Sirius, and books

Remus grew up in a lower class setting, and so didn't have access to too many books. He would read whenever he got the chance, though.

Sirius's family were constantly trying to force him to read classics like great expectations or pride and prejudice.

When they went to Hogwarts, his family would send him a book every so often with instructions to read it and report back on it by letter the next week or so. Sirius, out of sheer defiance, would never even pick them up.

Then one day, Remus picked up one of the books he'd been sent, and asked if he could read it. Sirius shrugged, muttering about why he'd want to, but told him to go ahead.

Soon, Remus began reading all the books Sirius was sent. He would take the book, read it in a week, and write up a short synopsis for Sirius to copy and send a letter of to his parents - a small but effective act of rebellion which wouldn't get him in any trouble.

Remus did it partly for this, and always claimed he just didn't want Sirius to get in trouble unnecessarily. But he wasn't fooling anyone. Part of it was for Sirius - even then he would've done anything for him. But mostly, it was for the books. He couldn't get enough of them. It was a whole new world of literature for him. He would devour book after book after book.

Soon, it became second nature for Sirius to throw whatever new book he'd been sent onto Remus's bed, and for Remus to pick it up and start reading it without a word of discussion. It became a sort of ritual for them.

All the way through his teens and adult years Remus loved classic literature. He read any and all Jane Austin, Charles Dickens, and H.G.Wells book he could find.

[marlsswrites]

Regulus: Effie said she’s on her way.

James: How do you know?

Regulus: She… texted me?

James: Why would she text you? I’m her son?

Regulus: Yeah well I’m clearly her favourite.

James: How-

Regulus: Look *whips out phone* she has TWO hearts next to my name.

James: WHAT?

Regulus: See.

James: I only have ONE??

Regulus patting James on the back: Shhh, it’ll be okay.

[ye-olde-trojan-horse]

remus was james’s gay awakening (he’s the casanova of gryffindor tower, so duh)

sirius was james’s gay ‘confirmation’ (they kissed once, and james knew he wasn’t straight)

then james said hmmmm I want a combination of both, and ended up with regulus.

[moonyviiew]

💔💔 everything works out nice in the end

[hazy-cosmic-skies]

au where remus grew up with his muggle mum so he has a super deep interest in something like star trek, or like ancient egypt or lord of the rings, and sirius, who had never heard abt these muggle things could listen to him talk for hours

[analogicalreasoning]

He would.

He needs that wine.

[thisfeelslike-iykyk]

love languages ࿐ ࿔*:･ﾟ

hp boys x reader (ft. harry potter, ron weasley, fred weasley, draco malfoy, cedric diggory, remus lupin, sirius black, james potter, tom riddle) backtrack: inspiration: my post for pjo (here) that has the same concept

harry potter

giving: acts of service

harry always fights to protect those he loves, lest we forget the battle in the department of mysteries to “save” sirius, and even those he could not care less about (ahem draco). he’s self sacrificing, literally walking to his own death in the last book to save everyone else. and on a day to day basis, he goes out of his way to include or be nice to everyone, especially those who don’t really have friends, like luna or neville. he’s less about grand gestures and sappy love, instead preferring to care for his loved ones in practical ways.

receiving: words of affirmation

before harry went to hogwarts and met his friends, he literally received no love. petunia, vernon, and dudley would emotionally and physically abuse him. for that reason, I think harry would really appreciate someone praising him or just simply saying an “I appreciate you” or even “I love you”. also for that reason, I think physical touch might be a receiving love language for harry too.

ron weasley

giving: acts of service

oh gosh here we go, I already know there’s going to be so many “acts of service” guys on here. ron’s one of the most loyal people in the series, he’s always there for his friends and he is super selfless and protective of them. curse the movies for taking away his moment where he stands up on a broken leg to protect harry from a literal serial killer (well not really, but they didn’t know it at the time). he’s not the most, uh, articulate should we say, but he always helps his friends out.

receiving: words of affirmation

growing up in a family as big as his, ron got cast aside a lot. I mean, his literal deepest desire was to be noticed by others and not be overshadowed. and deep down he definitely knew that his family loved him, it was just kind of hard to see sometimes since his parents’ and siblings’ attention was always so divided. (side note, as an only child I could not imagine being in a family of ron’s size; one of my best friends has two sisters and she’s one of the nicest people I know, and I definitely think there’s a correlation) so if someone were to finally notice him and genuinely love him for who he is and tell him that, it would make him so happy. finally, he’s enough as he is. finally, he feels like someone loves him.

fred weasley

giving: quality time

quality time and acts of service are the big ones for fred. he’s willing to put himself into dangerous situations during the war (rip fred weasley, you deserved better) and the battle of seven potters. besides that, he thrives on bringing people together and making connections. he’s super friendly to everyone, a classic jokester, and he shows his love through the time he spends around people, especially george. they were always together. it hurts that they can't be anymore.

receiving: quality time

fred spent like all of his time with george when they were first starting weasleys’ wizard wheezes. granted, that was because starting a business takes a lot of time and effort, but it shows how fred is willing to spend time focusing on his passions. that led me to think he’d find it super important to spend time with his loved ones, and he would want his partner to spend a lot of time with him too. he uses humor as a defense mechanism and a coping mechanism, but deep down he knows that the war is actually dangerous and will have real consequences, such as bill getting mauled or george losing an ear. (or, you know, FRED LOSING HIS LIFE.) so he treasures every little moment with his loved ones.

draco malfoy

giving: acts of service

thinking about this was actually really hard. draco’s such a cold person, and he’s never shown love; all his selfless actions can be chalked up to fear and having no choice. so I had to look at when and why he married astoria. and this meant dipping into the cursed child, which I’ve never read fully but have read enough to be able to say I hate it and I don’t accept it. he truly did love astoria, even when his relationship with his parents suffered because of it. he became a better person because of astoria--miss  girl really said “I can fix him”. he even went so far as to disregard his father’s wishes when he wanted to let the malfoy line die with him. so I think when he really does find someone he loves, draco can be a pretty selfless person.

receiving: words of affirmation

gosh, just how much do people suck up to him? he was treated like a king in his early hogwarts years, and he loved it. I think the deeper reason is that he grew up without a ton of verbal affection from his family, so that’s something he craves from other places--a partner, or peers. the first time he hears an “I love you”, he’d be absolutely shocked and maybe turn cold or shut down. after some time and patience from both of you, he’d slowly begin to accept praise or loving words. if he’s feeling brave, he may even reciprocate them. only when it’s in the middle of the night and he’s pretty sure you’re asleep, though.

cedric diggory

giving: quality time

cedric spent a lot of time with cho when they were together; they would always go on dates and spend a lot of time together in between classes. it shows how much he values spending time with his loved ones. another giving love language of his is definitely quality time, because cedric is 100% a giver. he tipped harry off about the golden egg. he wanted harry to take the cup when they were in the maze. he’s just such a nice guy.

receiving: physical touch

this is for two reasons. one because I want it to be, and two because did you see his face when rita skeeter ruffled his hair in the movie? the guy was not having it, but I bet if the right person did it he’d be all blushy and smiley. also when harry went to the courtyard to tell him about the dragons, he was literally laying in his friend’s lap. and I can’t remember correctly, but wasn’t it said that he and cho would constantly hold hands? yeah. enough said.

remus lupin

giving: acts of service

remus does so much for others. he was one of the best defense against the dark arts professors for a reason. and even if his competition wasn’t so poor, I’m sure he would’ve been just as popular. he’s a natural mentor and caregiver, always there for others and sometimes neglecting his own needs because of it. he engages with his students on a personal level, especially harry, and he is always willing to put himself in danger for others, as seen in the battle of seven potters and the battle of hogwarts.

receiving: words of affirmation

this and quality time. for quality time, he spent a lot of time with his friends in school, and he spent a lot of time with harry when he was the datda professor. this time really helped grow his relationships and helped him feel close to his newfound family. as for words of affirmation, I think it’s obvious; as a kid, he never really had friends, and as a result he secretly yearns for encouragement and emotional support. kind words and whispered promises that everything will be okay. that is how remus lupin feels loved.

sirius black

giving: quality time

sirius spent so much time with his friends when he was young. he had a really rocky relationship with his family, so he gave all of his love to his friends. he and james were practically inseparable, they had such a nice connection. on top of that, after barely any human interaction for twelve whole years in azkaban, he treasures every single moment he has with his loved ones. it’s like every time he and his partner are together, he looks at them and can hardly believe this is real. but it is real. he’s out of azkaban, he’s free, and he has such an amazing partner to spend the rest of his life with. that’s decades! (I can’t with sirius’s death, I--no. he did not die.)

receiving: words of affirmation

sirius spent his childhood and adult life being rejected and ridiculed. that’s got to hurt, especially when he was literally in azkaban for something he didn’t do. he was so deprived of love and general human interaction for twelve years that I imagine he’d initially be kind of awkward or even scared when his partner first shows him love through praise or verbal affection. after a while though, he’d warm up and hopefully show that youthful, happy side of him again. also, he’d probably be big on quality time, since he got none of it at all during his azkaban years.

james potter

giving: words of affirmation

ah, finally someone who’s not acts of service or quality time! at this point I think maybe it’s just me. james is teasing and playful with his words; he’s very vocal about his affection and appreciation for his friends and loved ones. he did, after all, ask lily out pretty much every time he saw her. not at all like remus, who is a love letters and secret admirer kind of guy.

receiving: words of affirmation

james loved hearing praise and support. especially when he was in school. fuel his ego. that’s it.

tom riddle

giving: words of affirmation

I don’t think voldemort could physically feel love. I sometimes wonder if tom riddle and voldemort were different people, and honestly that’s a can of worms I don’t want to get into right now. I believe there’s some sort of theory that he can’t feel love because he was conceived while his dad was under a love potion? I have no idea. the important thing is that we all know how good tom riddle was at manipulating people. flattery gets you nowhere, they say, well clearly not if you’re tom marvolo riddle, because flattery got him everywhere. so he would use words to flatter people and show his admiration or appreciation of them, but was any of it actually real? I doubt it.

receiving: words of affirmation

honestly kind of the same deal with draco, but he's a lot worse. he wants to be treated like a king--scratch that, he wants to be treated like a god. he craves affirmation for his greatness and abilities. all his followers praise him endlessly, calling him “my lord” and sucking up to him. he also wanted his ideologies to be affirmed and supported by others. let’s face it, words of affirmation were just another way for him to prove to himself that he’s the greatest.

just a heads up guys, I'm so tired as I'm writing this so it was unedited

divider by @enchanthings

taglist: @loveinalocket, @raysmayhem-72, @stars-tonight, @toooster, @soft-likethesunset, @sheisntyou

[bagelmist]

Man I wish gay people were real

[chocolateremus]

Secret admirer.

Pairings: Remus x Fem!reader

Warnings: Weirdo reader, sh, scars. Slow burn but it's worth it please trust me ☹️💔

Summary ! Remus found himself slowly falling inlove with you, but doesn't have the courage to tell you the reason he has so many scars, but what happens when he sees you do too?

Word count: 5.92k words

Masterlist

Early morning, the cold air hit, the smell of fresh trees and rain hits so perfectly, he saw the same girl from yesterday spoke to Lily. You. Remus stood several feet away, pretending to be doing something else as he watched Lily and the strange girl speak. He continued to feign interest in a nearby tree as he watched them out of the corner of his eye, listening to their conversation.

Every time he looks toward your way, he feels his heart skipping a beat. Always. Remus's attention was brought away from the nearby girls as he heard James and Sirius's voices carry over from a short distance away. He turned his head, watching as James and Sirius argued with each other, obviously challenging each other on something that Remus couldn't hear. After a moment, he turned back, only to see that Lily and the girl were gone now.

Remus stared at the empty spot where the girls had been standing moments ago, feeling a strange sense of emptiness now that they were gone. He had a lingering suspicion that he was forgetting something, but couldn't quite place what. He ran a hand through his messy hair before looking back down at his book, trying to focus on the words on the pages, but he couldn't help but remain distracted, his heart still feeling weird and a slight ache in his chest.

Remus found himself drawn to the sight of this mysterious girl. Every time he sees you, your sweet shy smile, the way you elegantly carried herself. He often found himself wondering how he had never noticed you before. Every morning, he would wake up early, just to catch a glimpse of you. Today, he found you in the common room, having tea with Mary. He made his way over to them, under the guise of wanting to get some tea.

Remus couldn't help but smile as he heard your laughter, your soft, melodious giggles carrying themselves through the air. The smell of your sweet scent filled his nose as he got closer and closer to the pair. His heart rate slowly picked up slightly as he walked over, wanting to be closer to you.

"Oh- Hi Remus!" Mary greeted him, Remus snapped out of his own thoughts as he heard Mary's voice, realizing that he was now standing in front of you two, tea completely forgotten.

"Hi Mary. How are you?"

His eyes darted to the mysterious girl, noticing the way your face lit up when you saw him, your sweet smile making his heart flutter in his chest.

"We're doing great. Tea?" Mary asked, the mysterious girl has an odd sense of style, something you would see outside of Hogwarts, lots of beads, bracelets or charms on your wrist, necklaces, color mix.

Remus nodded, his eyes remaining fixed on the mysterious girl. He didn't know why, but he couldn't help but be drawn to you. He watched the way you fiddled with the bracelet charms on her wrist, all while watching the light play in your eyes with the smile on your face.

"Yeah, some tea would be great. Thanks, Mary."

"It's mountain tea, Lyn got it from her trip to Athens." Mary said, Remus smiled at the mention of the mysterious girl's name, Lyn. It was a pretty name that seemed to fit you so well. You muttered a hi, Remus saw that you were shy, and soft-spoken too. Anyone could tell from the first look, giving a sense of comfort for some reason.

He watched the way your eyes darted to the tea, a soft, shy smile on your lips, but there was something else, something that drew him to you even more.

"Hey ho Moony!" A slap on Remus back made him spit the drink out slightly. Remus's eyes widened in surprise as he felt James's hand slap against his back, the sudden action causing him to spit out some of the tea.

"Prongs, what the hell was that for?"

"Sorry, we just pranked Snivellus,and it was totally the best prank ever." James said, before plopping down next to Remus, so did Sirius.

"Oh, really? What did you do this time?"

He asked, before noticing Sirius sitting down next to him, the two of them now effectively sandwiching him between them.

"It's a secret!" Sirius said, before snatching the tea from Remus hand and chugging it. Remus scowled as Sirius snatched the tea from his hand, the last drop of his tea now being quickly siphoned up by his friend.

"Hey! That was my tea, you arsehole."

"no worries yea? Sweet Lynnie has more yes?"

Remus rolled his eyes again, before looking over to 'Sweet Lynnie' as Sirius called you, noting the way the nickname seemed to cause your pale cheeks to flush with a slight blush.

"Get me more would ya darling?"

Remus rolled his eyes at Sirius's request, knowing that his friend could easily get tea himself instead of having the girl do it for him. He looked over at you, watching as your cheeks flushed a little more with a soft blush when you were called 'darling.' Remus continued to watch the girl as you hesitantly agreed to get more tea for Sirius. He noticed the way you fidgeted with a bracelet on your wrist as you pushed yourself up out of the chair, the action drawing Remus's attention again to the several charms, beads, and jeweled bangles that adorned your delicate wrists.

Remus couldn't help but notice the bandages that peeked out from beneath the bangles on her wrists. He wondered, somewhat concerned, about what type of injury she might have that would require bandages.

He found himself watching the way she moved and carried herself, the grace and elegance in her every action. Remus found his eyes constantly drawn to her, like a moth to a flame.

˚₊‧꒰ა 𐙚 ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

It's been a while since, Remus tried to talk to you but never had the big courage to, always chicken out at the last moment. Well. Until now.

The picnic party held by Lily was fun, really. Near the lake, Remus said James and Sirius competing to see who could swim the farthest. Remus watched as James and Sirius competed with each other in the lake, their friendly competition putting a smile on his face. But his focus was soon drawn away from them, towards the tree line, when he noticed you. Seated on a swing, idly swinging back and forth, looking so isolated and lonely. He couldn't explain why, but the sight of you alone on the swing, all by yourself, tugged at something in his chest.

Remus watched you on the swing from afar for a few more moments, feeling the odd aching feeling in his chest grow stronger. His eyes lingered on your lonely and isolated form by the tree line, before slowly finding the courage to walk closer to you. His heart rate becoming increasingly faster with every step. As he approached the swing where you sat, he couldn't help but notice every little detail about you, the way you looked, your hair, your eyes, the way you held yourself, everything. Finally, he came to a stop right next to the swing, a small distance between the two of you.

Remus hesitated for a moment, gathering up the confidence to speak to you, before finally breaking the silence that hung between the two of you.

"Erm... mind if I..."

He motioned towards the vacant swing next to you as you nodded. Remus gave you a small smile in response and muttered a soft 'thanks' before carefully sitting down on the vacant swing next to you. The two of you sat there together, a brief moment of awkward silence between you, before Remus opened his mouth to speak once more.

"So... why are you all alone over here?"

"Oh I just like being alone.. y'know?" Remus nodded a little bit in understanding, his eyes continuing to dart around your form, not able to help himself from noticing your appearance. He found your answer a bit strange, but he didn't comment on it further.

"Y-Yeah, I get that. Nothing wrong with a little peace and quiet... although, being alone at parties can kind of, y'know, suck sometimes."

A brief moment of silence fell again as Remus struggled to find something else to say, wanting to continue the conversation. He searched his mind for something, anything, to fill the silence that settled over the two of you, but nothing came to mind. So, he ended up just staring at you for a moment, studying your features and looking at how the soft light of the sun played across your face.

"Hey how'd you get so many scars..? Your face.." *Remus's head snapped up as you suddenly spoke, the question slightly catching him off guard. He automatically reached up to his face, gently tracing a finger along a few of the scars that marked his cheek, before letting his hand fall away once more.*

"Ah, these? It's... kind of a long story, actually." Remus's head snapped up as you suddenly spoke, the question slightly catching him off guard. He automatically reached up to his face, gently tracing a finger along a few of the scars that marked his cheek, before letting his hand fall away once more. Remus mentally cursed to himself slightly as he tried to think of what exactly to say. The truth was definitely not an option. You were a normal student, someone who clearly knew nothing of the magical world, let alone a werewolf. He couldn't exactly just say 'oh, you know, lycanthropy.'

So, he tried to think of an excuse, a reason for the scars on his face other than the truth. But unfortunately, it wasn't coming to him.

"Ah, these? It's... kind of a long story, actually."

Remus's eyebrows furrowed as he noticed the glimpse of white once again peeking out from under your bracelets. That same aching, fluttery feeling in his chest returned, stronger than before as it ached at the thought that you might be hurt, that something was wrong. Without thinking much, he spoke before he could stop himself.

"Hey, erm... those bandages-" He gestured to your wrist. "Are you... okay?"

"Uhh.. yea."

Remus studied your face closely as you spoke, not quite believing you. He couldn't explain why, he just felt his protective, over-worried nature taking over. He couldn't bring himself to look away from the bandages on your wrist, the faint ache in his chest refusing to go away.

"You sure? I mean... you're wearing bandages for a reason..."

"Yea.. it's just I'm really clumsy. I have bruises here and there."

Remus didn't seem fully convinced by your answer, his eyes still trained on the bracelets around your wrist. He noted the way your fingers instinctively fiddled with them, as if trying to conceal something.

"You sure it's just from being clumsy...? Seems a little excessive just for some bruises..."

"No .. this one I fell off my bike around some branches." Remus watched you closely, his heart rate picking up a bit at your statement. Something was off; he could tell that there was something more to the story than you were letting on. He wanted to press further, to ask more questions, but he held himself back, not wanting to pry too much.

"And what about the other one? The one on your other wrist...?"

"same thing.. I was holding onto my bike handles."

Remus studied your face, his eyebrows furrowing once more. He wasn't quite sure if he believed what you were saying, the way you fidgeted with the bracelets around your wrists setting off alarm bells in his head. He decided to press a little further, wanting to get to the bottom of the mystery.

"And how often does this happen...? You falling off your bike and ending up with bandages on your wrists...?"

"Just this once.. my brakes broken and I didn't notice."

Remus nodded slightly, digesting the information. He still had a lingering suspicion that there was more to the story than you were letting on, but he didn't want to seem too pushy or nosy. He let the silence fall between the two of you as he continued to watch you, studying the way you fidgeted with the bangles on your wrists and the way the sunlight played across your face. Purple cardigan, mesh skirt over jeans, hair charms, sun symbol necklace and tons of charms, bangles, beads and metals on your wrist, nothing about you looked normal. Rather odd.

Remus let his eyes roam over your form, taking in every little detail about you. He found himself slightly fascinated by you, the way you looked so different from all other girls at Hogwarts, with your own unique, and slightly strange, style. His mind was filled with so many questions. Who are you? Where are you from? Why do you look like this, act like this? Why does his heart always flutter whenever he's near you?

"Do you think I'm weird?" Remus blinked slightly in surprise at your question, his thoughts being interrupted by the suddenness of your words. He looked at you, studying your face, noticing the insecure, hesitant look you had. He felt his heartstrings tug at the sight, something inside him wanting to reassure you.

"No, not weird... just... different." He answered honestly, a small smile on his lips.

"...Are you different too?"

Remus paused at your question, his eyes darting away as he considered his answer. In some ways, he was different. He knew that much. His condition made sure of that. He was a ticking time bomb, cursed to transform into a mindless beast every full moon, unable to control himself. He looked back at you, his eyes meeting yours, a small smile on his lips.

"Yeah... I guess you could say I'm different too."

"Do you like being different?" Remus let a moment of silence fall again as he considered your question. It was something he had thought about before, whether he liked being different or not. Being different was what set him apart from others, made him unique.

But at the same time, it also made him an outsider, an outcast. Someone who didn't quite fit in.

He looked back at you, his eyes locking onto yours, before he answered.

"Sometimes. But it can also be lonely."

"But we can be weird together right?"

Remus couldn't help but let out a soft, light laugh at your comment. He felt his heart flutter a bit in his chest again, the small, almost vulnerable, smile on his lips growing wider in response to your words. The suggestion that the two of you could be different and weird together, that he wasn't alone in his loneliness, filled him with a strange, comforting warmth.

"Yeah.. I think I'd like that."

˚₊‧꒰ა 𐙚 ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

Over the weeks Remus felt like he couldn't ever think he could like you more. You were fun, shy, soft-spoken and so lovable, but him disappearing for about 3 days and coming back with scars wasn't really the best thing to do, it gravelly concerned you. Sitting in the common room, Remus couldn't help but feel your stares on his scars.He could sense the curiosity and concern in your gaze, as you studied the new scars that adorned his face. He fidgeted uncomfortably under your stare, his hands instinctively coming up to cover the scars, as if he was trying to hide them from your eyes. He didn't want you to see him like this, to see the evidence of his curse.

Remus let out a small sigh of relief as you finally looked away, the weight of your gaze lifting from him. He couldn't help but feel a twinge of sadness at the sight of you avoiding his eyes, though. He found himself wanting your eyes on him again, yearning for that familiar sense of warmth and comfort that your gaze provided. But he knew that he shouldn't keep this up, knew that he couldn't, no matter how much he wanted to. Remus's eyes couldn't help but be drawn to the new bandage wrapped around your wrist again, peeking out from underneath the bangles and charms that adorned it. He found himself feeling a pang of worry and concern at the sight, the nagging thought that there was more to your story than you were letting on, still lingering in his mind. He had to resist the urge to reach out and ask what had happened, to gently pull back the layers of metal and beads that hid the mystery beneath.

The sound of your bracelets clinging together as you flipped the page of the book on your lap filled the otherwise silent room, creating a light, almost melodic sound. Remus, seated on the sofa next to you, found himself unable to focus on the book in his hands, his mind too distracted by your presence next to him. He snuck a glance at you out of the corner of his eye, studying your face, noting the way the light played off your features, before quickly looking away again. Remus watched as you stood up, closed your book, and headed towards the stairs to your dorm. A small pang of disappointment filled him at the thought of you leaving, not wanting you to leave just yet. He found himself wanting to keep you there, talking with him for just a bit longer.

"Night, sweetheart." He said in a soft voice, his eyes following your movements as you walked away. The room was quiet and still, the late hour leaving most students sound asleep in their dorm rooms. However, Remus found himself wide awake, his mind still in turmoil.

A small part of him yearned to be there, to hold you close and whisper silly words into your ear, to watch over you as you slept. But he knew he couldn't, no matter how badly he wanted to.

˚₊‧꒰ა 𐙚 ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

The days continued as the heat and humidity of summer slowly started setting in. Remus found himself often in a state of sweat and discomfort, the heat not exactly helping his restlessness at night.

His eyes couldn't help but be drawn to your wrists, where the bandages around them peeked out from underneath the bangles and bracelets you still wore. The nagging feeling that there was more to the mystery of your wrist continued to linger in his mind.

Remus couldn't help but notice the way you were dressed. Weird clothing combos with all your jewelry and bracelets made for an endearing combination, not to mention the adorable way you held the popsicle up to his lips, offering him a taste of it. A small smile tugged at his lips at the sight, and he couldn't help but feel his heart flutter at the gesture.

"Trying to cool me down, princess?"

"It's really hot. Give it a taste! It's strawberry."

Remus chuckled softly, amused at your insistence that he try it. He leaned in and took a small bite of the popsicle, the sweet and tangy taste of strawberry hitting his tongue. He let out a small satisfied sigh, feeling the coolness of the treat bring a small relief from the heat.

"Mmm, it's good. Thanks, sweetheart."

Remus could feel his heart flutter in his chest as he watched you sucking on the popsicle, your stained lips and tongue making him feel a faint sense of jealousy. He tried to ignore it, telling himself it was silly, but he couldn't help it. The sight of you with your lips stained red and the popsicle stick in your hand was making his heart race.

His eyes still lingering on your lips, silently wishing he was the one you were sucking on instead.

˚₊‧꒰ა 𐙚 ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

"Remus..."

Walking out of hogsmeade to Hogwarts was always a long way, it was even harder with the heat. Remus let out a soft sigh as he felt the heat press down on him once again. Sweat dripped down his forehead, causing his shirt to stick to his skin. He looked at you as you spoke, a hint of concern in his eyes.

"Yeah, princess?"

"M'legs are tired."

Remus chuckled softly at your declaration, a gentle smile forming on his lips at your admission. He couldn't help but find your slightly whinny tone slightly adorable, a small part of him finding it endearing.

"Tired already? We're only halfway there, sweetheart."

Remus couldn't help but let out another chuckle as he saw the way you were standing, your legs bent and a slightly pleading look in your eyes. He knew you were tired, the heat and the long walk back to Hogwarts taking its toll on you.

He stopped walking for a moment, studying your form, a mixture of fondness and slight amusement in his eyes.

"Come here, princess." Remus held out his hand, gesturing for you to come closer. He had a small smirk on his lips, his eyes scanning your form, taking in the sight of you, tired and slightly whinny.

"C'mere. Hop up on my back."

You went over to him like a puppy before jumping on top on his back, your arm laid out to his neck, Remus wrapped his arms underneath your legs, securing you on his back as you jumped up on him. A small smile tugged at his lips as he felt your hand around his neck, the soft bandages on your wrist brushing against his skin and reminding him of their presence.

He started walking again, supporting you on his back, carefully minding your legs hanging over his arms.

"You comfortable up there, princess?"

"Yes.." Remus felt a small hint of relief at your response, glad that you seemed to be comfortable on his back. He carried on walking, the weight of you on his back not as heavy as he'd expected. Feeling your arms around his neck and your legs around his arms, he found himself liking the feeling of having you close to him.

He glanced down at the bandages on your wrist, his thoughts drifting to the mystery of what those scars were from. He wanted to know, but didn't want to pry.

Remus noticed your silence as he walked, a small pang of concern nagging in his mind. The usual chattiness that he had come to expect from you was strangely missing, and he couldn't help but wonder if something was bothering you.

He glanced at your wrist again, his eyes lingering on the bandages, before he spoke up, breaking the silence gently.

"You're quiet today, princess."

"M'tired."

Remus nodded in understanding, a small smile tugging at his lips at your tired confession.*

"I know you're tired, sweetheart, but we're almost back to the castle. We can rest then."

He found himself enjoying the weight of you on his back, the feeling of you so close to him somewhat comforting. He continued walking, slowly nearing Hogwarts.

˚₊‧꒰ა 𐙚 ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

Remus's body was battered and bruised, the full moon transformation having taken its toll on him as always. He staggered into the prefect bathroom, the warm water running, and sank down into the bathtub with a sigh.

Hot baths had become something of a comfort for him lately. The heat soothed his aching muscles and numbed the physical pain, although the sight of the fresh bleeding scars brought a small pang of disgust.

His wet drenched hair didn't bother him, he wanted to go and collapse straight into his bed, he changed into his clothes and jumped straight into the bed alone since Sirius and James were sleeping at their girlfriends. but a familiar ring was heard, like noises that would come from your bracelets that clink each other, Remus's ears instinctively perked up at the sound of the clinking noise, the familiar ring instantly recognizable as it broke the quiet of the room. He sat up in his bed, his weary gaze scanning the room in search of the source. His tired mind quickly made the connection, knowing that sound all too well, a knock before the door opened, Remus already knew who it was.

"Hi.."

Remus smiled weakly as he heard your voice, his expression showing a mix of fatigue and relief as the door opened and you appeared before him.

"Hey, princess..."

He sat up a bit straighter in his bed, a small hint of sleep lingering in his eyes. Despite his exhaustion, seeing you brought a familiar sense of comfort.

"I've got chocolate.. uhm.. mind if I sit?" You asked, despite knowing he would say yes to you sitting on his bed, before giving him the crinkly golden wrapper inside with chocolate. Remus chuckled softly at your question, a small smile playing on his lips. Of course he didn't mind if you sat on his bed. In fact, he secretly found it endearing when you did.

"Of course. Come here, sweetheart."

He patted the empty spot next to him, beckoning you to sit down. His eyes stayed on yours, watching as you approached with the crinkled golden wrapper in hand.

"You okay..? I've noticed you've always been gone during the full moon.. and I just ..." You said, as you sat, his body tensed up. Remus's expression softened as you spoke, a pang of guilt tugging at his heart. He knew you were aware of his monthly 'disappearance', and he knew you must be worried about him. He let out a soft sigh, his gaze fixed on the empty space ahead of him for a moment before answering.

"I'm... I'm fine. It's just the full moon taking a toll on me. I promise I'm alright."

His voice was tired, but he tried to hide his exhaustion as best as he could from you.

"You're bleeding y'know?"

Remus was caught slightly off guard by your comment. He had almost forgotten about the fresh cuts and bleeding scars that marked his body, so used to them now that he hardly noticed the pain or the blood.

He looked down at his arms, the slashes and cuts still weeping blood, some already starting to form scars. He let out a small sigh.

"Ah...yeah, I guess I am...it's nothing, though. I'm fine."

"D'you have more of them..?"

Remus's eyes met yours as you asked your question, a flicker of vulnerability and hesitation in his gaze. He knew you meant well, but he didn't want to burden you with the knowledge of the full extent of his scars and the truth behind them.

"Yeah...I do."

He looked away, avoiding your gaze. The thought of showing you the rest of his scars was both terrifying and oddly comforting. He didn't want to see the look on your face once you had seen them in full. You knew that. You looked down as if thinking of doing something. Something that could change his view. A moment of silence before you spoke up.

"I'll show you mines if you show me yours."

*Remus's eyes widened slightly at your unexpected suggestion. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. You were offering to show him your scars in exchange for seeing his.*

*A part of him wanted to protest, to resist the notion of revealing such intimate and vulnerable parts of themselves to each other. But another part of him, a larger part of him, couldn't deny the strange sense of comfort and understanding your offer had brought. He let out a shaky breath.

"You sure about this, princess?"

"Mhm.."

Remus's heart thumped heavily in his chest. Your agreement had both surprised and relieved him. He could see the sincere determination in your eyes.

He took a deep breath, steeling himself for what was about to happen. With a mix of hesitation and courage, he reached for the hem of his shirt, grasping it tightly.

"Alright then, sweetheart...but you first."

Taking off the bunch of bracelets he had never seen you took of before, the same white bandage there had stains of red and orange, before peeling it off, deep red raw scars that's were in the process of healing appeared. Both sides of your wrist, his heart skipping a beat as the deep red, raw scars came into view. He had never seen your wrists bare like this before, so the image of the healing cuts was both shocking and distressing. He fought the urge to reach out and touch the fresh wounds, his hands clenching into fists to keep himself grounded.

"Sweetheart..."

He whispered, his voice thick with a mixture of pain and concern. He couldn't believe what he was seeing.

".. I.. I wanna see yours."

Remus's heart ached at the sight of your wrists, but he knew that he had promised to show you his scars in return. With a mixture of reluctance and determination, he slowly lifted the hem of his shirt, revealing his own collection o scars that adorned his chest and arms.*

The scars were a stark contrast to his usually unblemished skin, a permanent mark of the pain and suffering he had endured. Deep cuts, scratches, and pale white lines were scattered across his body in various sizes and shapes. You stood quiet, the both of you did. Before your hand reached out, uncertain.

"Can I..?"

Remus's breath caught in his throat as your hand reached out towards his scars. He wasn't used to people seeing them, let alone touching them. But he nodded, knowing that he had agreed to this. He trusted you.

"Yeah...you can."

His voice was soft, a hint of trepidation mixed with a hint of relief. He watched as your hand inched closer, anticipation and nervous tension building in his chest.

Remus's breath hitched as your soft touch grazed over his chest and torso, his body responding to the gentle sensation with a mix of comfort. No one had ever touched his scars like this before, with such care and tenderness. It was an odd feeling, both intimate and soothing.

He closed his eyes, savoring the feeling of your hands tracing over his scars, like a salve to his wounded body and soul. A small sigh escaped his lips, tension melting away beneath your feather-light touch.

"My wrist are no the only ones though.."

Remus's eyes opened slowly as your words hit him, his mind registering the implications of your statement. He looked up at you, his gaze curious but caring.

"There's more?"

He whispered, his voice gentle and concerned. The revelation that there were more scars beyond your wrists caught him off guard, and a protective instinct stirred within him. Remus's heart ached as your silent indication confirmed his suspicions. His eyes trailed down to your stomach, even though he had already guessed where the scars might be.

A mixture of sadness and anger stirred within him. He had never guessed that you carried more scars than he had thought, but he was also strangely glad you had chosen to share this part of yourself with him.

"Can I...?"

He asked, his voice barely more than a whisper, his gaze fixed on your stomach. Remus watched as you nodded, giving him permission to see the scars on your stomach. He took a deep breath, his heart pounding in his chest, before gently lifting the hem of your shirt, his hands trembling slightly.

He felt the smooth skin of your stomach beneath his fingers, a marked contrast to the scarred skin of his own body, as he slowly revealed your hidden wounds. He braced himself, preparing to see the evidence of your pain.

it wasn't deep, but they were long thin white lines over your stomach, long strides of it across your body. Remus's breath caught in his throat as he saw the scars across your stomach. They were long, thin, and white, evidence of past pain and struggles that hadn't faded completely from your body. His heart ached at the sight, and a mix of sadness and anger rose within him.

He traced his fingers lightly along the lines, careful not to press too hard or cause you pain, but unable to keep himself from touching them. The urge to comfort and protect you was strong, but he knew he had to tread carefully.

"Rem.."

Remus looked up from your stomach, his gaze meeting yours. A mix of emotions swam in his eyes - sadness, anger, and a deep sense of empathy for you. Your voice saying his name in such a soft, vulnerable tone made his heart ache even more.

"Yeah...?"

He whispered, his fingers still gently tracing over the scars on your stomach, his touch like a feather, his eyes not leaving your face. You held his face for a while, your hand rested against his cheek, before leaning closer and closer, uncertain. Remus didn't pull away as you held his face in your hand. He leaned into your touch, his cheek resting in your palm, the warmth of your skin against his a soothing comfort. As you leaned closer, he could feel the soft puffs of your breath mingling with his.

He could sense your uncertainty, your hesitation, and his heart hammered in his chest, a mixture of desire and nervousness coursing through his veins.

"I'm sorry I shouldn't-" Remus didn't allow you to pull back, his hands reaching up to grasp your wrist delicately, keeping you close to him. His eyes locked onto yours, his voice low and earnest.

"No, don't apologize...don't pull away."

He didn't know where this moment was heading, but he knew he didn't want it to end, not yet.

Remus searched your eyes, trying to understand the unspoken emotions and thoughts that flickered there. His heart raced, caught up in the intensity of the moment. He could feel your wrist beneath his fingers, the rapid pulse mirroring his own. He wasn't sure what was happening between you, but he couldn't tear his gaze away.

"Princess..."

He whispered your nickname tenderly, as if it had become a prayer on his lips. Remus leaned in, closing the gap between you. His lips gently brushed against yours, at first hesitant, but then more confident as he gave in to the desire that had built between you. The touch of his lips against yours sent a shockwave through his body, and his grip on your nape tightened slightly, pulling you even closer, as if he never wanted to let go.

˚₊‧꒰ა 𐙚 ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

Remus's head rested on your stomach, his chin resting near your hips as your fingers gently caressed his hair. The early morning light streamed in through the crack in the curtains, illuminating the room with a soft, dim glow. His body was warm and relaxed, the weariness from the night before fading as he found comfort in your touch and the intimacy of the moment.

He couldn't imagine anything more perfect than this - the feeling of your fingers running through his hair, the gentle rise and fall of your breathing beneath him, the scent of your skin surrounding him like a comforting blanket.

You let out a soft gasp as Remus's lips brush against your scars, sending a shiver down your spine. His arms wrapped around your hips, holding you close against him, and you melted into his embrace.

His kisses were light, but each one sent a small jolt of electricity through your body. The way he so tenderly kissed your scars, as if they were delicate treasures to be cherished, made your heart swell with a mix of emotions.

Falling asleep bare together, tangled limbs to let the rest of the marauders find the two of you like this in the afternoon, James can't help but let out a cheerful grunt as he has won the bet against Lily.

Please don't repost my fics on other platforms !

[here-am-i-sitting-in-a-tin-can]

Headcanon that after Sirius left Grimmauld Place, he started writing letters to his brother, but never sent them and after Regulus died, he started to burn every new letter he wrote, hoping that his brother could read them somewhere.

someone write this and tag me bc i won’t do it to myself

[outromoony]

Wolfstar in the Harry Potter books

[mystical-night-madness]

Sirius: Why do you have to be so tall?

Remus: *smirks* Would you prefer me on my knees? *winks and leaves the dorm to go study in the library*

Sirius: Wh- i- you- *red cheeks and screams inside as he watches his boyfriend leave*

[potions-of-dark-devotion]

Everyone Dreams of Going to Hogwarts

Every fan of Harry Potter has indulged in the fantasy of waiting for an Owl to deliver the fateful letter that will declare your future as a witch or wizard at Hogwarts School of witchcraft and wizardry. Every one of us old or young had dreamed of riding the train at Kings Cross Station, taking the boats across the black lake and seeing the castle for the first time, of having dinner in the great hall, of finally figuring out where you belong in the world and it just feeling right. They fantasize about seeing their common room for the first time finally feeling that warm sense of belonging and meeting the friends that you will keep for the rest of your life. Every single one of us had fantasized about meeting our professors, exploring the grounds and discovering our latent potential. It’s a comfort for many of us and happy place to go in our minds to escape reality.

For the witches and wizards of the Wizarding World that childhood fantasy is their reality. They too wait with bated breath for their letters. They too fantasize about finally feeling that “at home” feeling, the feeling that you finally belong to something bigger and more wonderful than their wildest dreams. The chance to prove themselves. The chance to start over for many, the chance to leave their sometimes abusive homes for a place that finally actually feels like home to them. Harry was one of those people. Dumbledore was one of those people. Hermione, Ron and even Neville all find this sense of belonging sooner or later. They all find their forever home at Hogwarts the way we all dream.

Now imagine being Seveurs Snape.

You live in a house with a father that doesn’t understand you and screams and yells at you and your mother on a daily basis and you feel so alone in the world. You have one peer who appreciates in you the magic that allows you to rise above the squaller and cruelty in which you live. You have one friend who sees you for who you are and appreciates that about you truly, while being forced to inhabit a world that not only doesn’t understand you but is actually often openly hostile to you. Hogwarts, you beleive, will be your escape from this hell, and best of all you get to take this wonderful friend with you. You are being whisked away to a fairy tale castle where dreams come true and you will finally feel safe and finally feel a real sense of home. You stay up all night all week waiting by the door in the early morning for the letter that is finally going to change your life. You pour over it with your best friend, going over every aspect of this incredible opportunity in your mind over and over. You’re planning how you’ll make the most of it. You finally let yourself look forward to something, to open your heart to something, to dream of something. Your greatest hearts desire to this moment is finally coming true.

Then you get on the train.

And the hell begins before the first day has ever even started. Your friend is angry at you for something entirely out of your control, and even though you make up destiny has deigned that on this day you will meet the person that will destroy any hope you ever entertained of Hogwarts being a home at all. His name is James Potter. His partners in the crimes which will forever change your life are Remus Lupin, Peter Pettigrew, and Sirius Black. From the moment you meet you are ridiculed by them, physically abused by them, and the worst part is from this day forward it is never going to end.

Your best friend is put not just in a different house but in the house that hates your house the most, and from this day forward you will forever have a strain on the only true friendship you’ve ever had. From this day forward you will have to meet them either in secret or at least in private to avoid angering both your houses at best and facing ridicule at worst. The moments you stole with this friend in the muggle hell will ironically be the only moments of peace you’ll truly have with them. Not only that, but they are sorted into the same house that 4 of your worst tormentors reside in.

But it’s even worse. Because although at home you can escape form your father and potential school bullies by hiding yourself away in some nook or cranny, making yourself scarce, staying out late at night in the woods or just being as quiet as possible; you will never be able to escape the torment that now awaits every day. You have classes with them, you run into them, you see them trying to take away the only friend you have every day. And it doesn’t even end there, now they have a tracking device that you don’t know about, but somehow they manage to find you no matter where you hide. No matter where you go they are somehow always there. No matter who you talk to, they all act like you’re crazy. Because none of the other professors or students know about the marauders map they find you strange for jumping at every blow of the wind. Because they don’t know about the map they don’t believe you at all when you try to explain that somehow James Potter and his gang seem to pop up conveniently every single place you go to hide and they even blame you for trying to figure out how to protect yourself. They tell you you’re bringing it on yourself for being too weird or too jumpy or too nosy. Even your best friend in the world is starting to doubt you. You feel like you’re going insane.

So you try to have your tormentors expelled. You try so hard to figure out something, anything that will end the days on end of suffering and abuse. But you’re the weird kid. You’re the ugly kid. You’re the emo goth kid. Nobody gives a shit about you and you know it. You know you’re on your own. You’re a half blood, so the the people in your house who were supposed to have your back ignore you at best and tease you about it at worst for letting Gryffindor students get the best of you. Any hope you had of Hogwarts being your home has been destroyed.

So you try to follow James and The Gang around. Yes everyone sees you as creepy for this, becusse you don’t have a map that magically tells you where they will be at all times. You have to go about it the old fashioned way. You hide behind bushes, you peak around corners. Yes everyone finds you creepy now on top of everything else, but it’ll be worth it if you can finally enjoy what was promised to you at age 11, a home. You’ll finally be able to breathe.

But no. Instead what happens is your tormentors figure out that you know that they are putting the lives of students in danger by wandering the grounds with a werewolf against the wishes of the headmaster. You know that if you can just prove it that the torment will be over, but what you don’t know is that they are one step ahead of you, and for the unimaginable crime of trying to thwart them; they are going to plan to inflict a dangerous illness of lycanthropy on you at best, maul you to death at worst. You are close to both your proof and your death when one of them gets cold feet at the last minute and decides he doesn’t in fact want to go to prison.

You think “maybe it’s finally over now”, “maybe everyone will see now that they are cruel, that this is what they’re really like”, “maybe I’ll finally get a moment of peace, maybe Dumbledore and Lily will finally beleive me”. But no. Of course not. Because remember, you’re the weird emo Slytherin kid and your life is secondary. It always has been. Dumbledore swears you to secrecy to protect one of your tormentors, so you get no justice for the attempt on your life. Because Dumbledore had forbidden you to speak about your traumatic experience of almost being murdered, your best friend doesn’t beleive you at all and instead blames you for sneaking around. They don’t even give you the chance to defend or explain yourself. Instead you’re made out to be the creepy bad guy who wants to destroy the Potter Gang out of jealously.

Worst of all you secretly suspect that your best friend has a thing for the person who makes your life a living hell every single day. You see the stolen glances and the way they look at each other, the way she is never totally on your side. You tell yourself that this is all in your head, that Lily would never betray you that way. That all the hours you spent dreaming of Hogwarts together will mean more than a crush. But oh, sadly you are very wrong there too.

Not even a few months after attempting to take your life your abusers are back at again. Remorseless as ever they hunt you down like dogs and follow your every footstep. You haven’t a moment of peace even to do your normal school work. The only place you are safe is your common room, and even then you can’t let your guard down.

Then one day it happens.

The little pieces of happiness that you’ve managed to tuck away from yourself are cruelly ripped away. They manage to find you again. The torment us as usual. They all gang up on you, each taking a go for their own amusement. They fling you on your back, force you to vomit, force you to listen to their emotional abuse while they make a go at hitting on your best friend, and the torment does not end there. Now they are picking you up off the ground and taking off your clothes. Now on top of every other humiliation they have amused themselves by sexually humiliating you in front of everyone in your class including your closest ally. Every part of you is on fire inside and out and the depth of horror and hurt inside you is so big you don’t know what to do with the feeling. Then your friend finally steps in. But now you’re so hurt and angry that it’s bursting out of you in the worst possible ways.

Now the worst thing finally happens.

You call your best friend a slur; something you know will hurt them more than any other thing, because you’re destroyed, because you’re angry at them for letting it get this far, because you’re humiliated and because you’re tired of not being held in a higher regard than the person who has ruined your life; because you’re sick of their moralizing and their pitty.

Now you’ve lost the only person you’ve ever really felt close to. Now you’ve lost any human sympathy forever.

And it’s not over yet. Now you’re upside down again. And this time they aren’t content with exposing the rest of your body for the world to see. Now they are out for blood, and the revenge they have settled on is Sexual Assault. They remove your underwear to expose your most private parts to the world and there is nothing you can do about it. Nowhere you can go. No one who cares. No one who will come to your rescue.

Snape must have felt so hopeless it’s a wonder he didn’t try to end his life. People have done so over much less.

Hogwarts was never truly a home for Severus Snape. Even in adulthood he works in the place that was the site of innumerable traumas and heartaches. Everyday he faces trigger after trigger of the worst day of his life, while protecting the progeny of the only person he ever felt close to and the person who cruelly ripped away any chance he had at normal life. This is why I feel for Severus Snape so much in every scene. He is confronted every day with the worst memories a person can endure yet he chooses to be brave anyway. He chooses to do the right thing anyway. He puts other people’s well-being first anyway. He chooses the side of the light beyond all that had conspired to make a sociopath out of him. He holds a place in his heart for love and he protects that love with his entire being. Platonic love is just as powerful as romantic love and Severus Snape is the perfect example of this. A person even in the worst circumstances can still make the most difference in the world, can still choose to be their own person and make their own choices. Even when the world is wholly against him, Severus Snape is the pinnacle of integrity.

This is why he’s my favorite character. He’s the bravest character in the narrative, but he’s also the character with the most integrity.

[vinylfoxbooks]

October 28 - Quiet | @into-the-jeggyverse | wc: 852

James doesn’t like the quiet, Regulus knows this. He knows they’re typically talking only moments into a silence that they deem uncomfortable -- which is most silences. 

But what he didn’t know before recently is that thone of the only times that James likes silence is when they’re trying to read. It’s the only time that they can focus on books, when there is absolute silence except for the sounds that they make. This was a realisation that Regulus came across several months into their relationship when Barty and Evan kicked him out of the dorm so they could shag so he found himself heading up to the Gryffindor tower. To either sit with his partner, his brother, or his brother’s boyfriend -- who he is with more often than Sirius. 

Only to find James settled on Remus’ bed with the taller man, the two of them leaning into each other with their own separate books -- this is something that Regulus will often find with this group, any variation of them will be curled up together on the couch, on one of their beds, wherever. And while he hated it in the first few months of them dating, and hated it even more before he and James started going on dates, purely from jealousy that he refuses to admit to out loud, but he’s gotten used to the sight. He knows, now, that there’s nothing, he knows that Remus and James wouldn’t do that to him or Sirius, and it’s the same with all four of the boys. 

So what he’s more confused by in this circumstance is James with a book in their hands. A large, obviously fictional -- it doesn’t have the normal cover of a textbook or a school book -- book that they’re intently reading. Remus glances up at his entry and puts his finger to his mouth, telling him to be quiet, before holding up a finger to signal that he waits. 

And wait he does. Regulus waits until James seemingly finishes with a chapter before they finally look up, grinning when they see him and putting a leather bookmark in the book. They practically fly out of Remus’ bed and gently toss their book onto their bed before pulling Regulus into a hug while the man himself goes back to his book. 

“Hi baby,” James smiles when they pull away, “What are you doing?”

Regulus hums, “I got booted from the dorm, what are you doing?” 

“Reading. It’s a new book that my dad sent me and I wanted to get to reading it as soon as possible.” 

“I didn’t know that you read.” Regulus furrows his brows.

James shrugs and guides him over to their bed, sitting down on it and grabbing the book so Regulus can see it, “Only when it’s really quiet. Usually I’ll read with Remus while Sirius and Pete are out or if its late enough.” They once again shrug with one shoulder, “It has to be silent for me to be able to focus.”

“Other than the noise you make,” Remus hums, flipping the page. He takes a second to glance up to Regulus, “They click their tongue and tap their feet or their fingers on the book when they read.”

At that, they rub the back of their neck, “Yeah, I don’t know how Remus puts up with me reading with him.”

“Remus can read while my brother is literally throwing himself all over him, getting up to his usual dramatics,” Regulus hums, “I’m sure Remus could read just fine in the middle of a tornado.” James laughs softly at that, letting the book fall from their hands when Regulus reaches out for it. Carrie, by Stephen King. Not something that Regulus would pick up himself, he’s not a modern horror reader, but he could see how James might like it from what he’s heard of it. 

And now James reads with Regulus, because Regulus has to have relative silence for him to be able to properly focus on his book, although not as much as James needs it -- he can still read in his classes sometimes and in the library, James can’t. Which is why when the sun goes down and it's just them together, or them and Remus, they’re finally able to settle down and read. And Remus was right, they always click their tongue and move their feet around. They’re always making a noise, which really doesn’t bother Regulus all that much, but he can’t help but think that it’s both cute and incredibly on brand for them. It makes sense to him, with how hyper aware they are of their surroundings and what everyone around them is doing, that they’d need silence to be able to properly focus on what’s happening in their book, but it also makes sense that they make noise to fill the silence because James doesn’t like silence. They’re always talking, they’re always making noises of some sort, like humming, to fill the silence and it’s no different when they’re reading, those noises just turn to something more subtle and gentle than their actual voice.

[courfee]

For day 14 of @jeguluskinktoberr