#RELATIONSHIPADVICE

[datinghotgranny]

Important Tips for Mature Women Navigating Online Dating

1. Be Authentic: 

- Share your true self and interests in your profile. Authenticity attracts like-minded individuals and fosters genuine connections.

2. Choose Reputable Sites: 

- Opt for dating platforms that prioritize safety and user verification, like OlderWomenDating, where profiles are thoroughly vetted.

3. Engage in Meaningful Communication: 

- Initiate conversations that go beyond small talk. Ask questions and discuss your expectations to gauge compatibility before meeting.

4. Trust Your Instincts: 

- Pay attention to your gut feelings. If something feels off or uncomfortable, don’t hesitate to move on from that connection.

5. Keep an Open Mind: 

- Approach online dating with flexibility and a sense of humor. Embrace the journey and enjoy the new connections you make, even if they don’t lead to romance.

[bychiamaka]

The relationships you have with other people is a direct expression of the relationship you have with yourself. What you allow, tolerate, & maintain with other people is the expressed manifestation of what you internally allow, tolerate, & maintain with yourself.

[thequantumnotebook]

Love In Action

Every relationship has its cracks; it's how we fill them that counts. How do you and your partner mend the gaps? Share your tips below!

[sk-lumen]

Do you have any advice around how to screen men for unprocessed baggage when dating/getting to know them? I’ve just come out of a 6 month relationship with another seemingly high value man who in the end got cold feet about us continuing to build a future together because of his unprocessed grief and trauma around his family falling apart (ex-wife and young son they still coparent) - which happened 5 years ago. I have a consecutive pattern of men I’ve been with in the past year and a half pulling the rug out from under me after 3-6 months suddenly, realising they actually aren’t ready to build something with someone, even though they all seemed so certain they were ready and looking for that in the beginning. I’m arranging to go to therapy of course to work with a professional through this, but wanted to know if you had any thoughts and tips around this!

Hi love,

There's really no exact science to vetting a partner with 100% success. People have free will, and they can pretend or put up masks, or they can just change their mind. You can't control that.

But you can do your part: it's a mixture of common sense, listening to your intuition, paying attention to their ACTIONS (not words because anyone can say sweet things), review the list of green flags in dating, and hope for the best.

If you want to go the extra mile, extend the dating process to 3-4 months, and make sure you're dating multiple people (this means no kissing or anything physical, just classic dating) so you're not stuck on any given guy, and if anyone walks away at any point you'll just be unbothered.

Therapy is definitely helpful to process your side of grief/trauma in dealing with this pattern. Perhaps ask yourself, what do you truly gain from repeating this pattern in dating, and see what comes up deep inside? How is "men walking away 6 months in" keeping you safe? Why do you consider yourself unworthy of being committed to? There's always a reason for our shadow patterns.

-L.

[marixxxo]

Kanye really had a GOAT twitter lmao

Gems on gems

[introspectconnect]

Deja Vu Love: Why We Repeat Relationship Patterns and How to Change

Love, while enchanting, can often feel like running in circles. Have you ever found yourself drawn to the same kind of partner time and time again? With a sense of déjà vu as you repeatedly find yourself with eerily similar partners. Why is this?

Once upon a time, I can confess I had a "type." I was irresistibly drawn to people's pain. It wasn’t a drive to 'fix' them or some dark intrigue, but rather, seeing a mirror image of my own internal turmoil. I could see it in their eyes, it was evident in their smile, it peeked through in their laugh, and it was obvious we wore the same burdensome mask to hide our scars. I naively believed building a bond based on shared trauma would help us understood each-others better and that we would guide each other on a road to healing. Instead, our pain inflicted more wounds on each other, that reinforced our negative beliefs and justified our unhealthy behaviors.

At the time it made sense, though looking back the flaw in my logic seems clear: Like the blind leading the blind, how can those equally lost, lead one another to light? This personal revelation reflects a challenge many people face in relationships. Chasing after partners based on idealized fantasies rather than real-world truths. It's easy to say, "I have a type," confidently stating our preferences, but do we ever pause to ask why? Are we genuinely yearning for a compatible soul, or are we simply seeking the traits of a person who idealizes a fantasy?

We must find the courage to question our desires. Only then can we uncover whether we're pursuing shallow ideas, or true compatibility and genuine connection. Consider someone who's always wanted a stable, money-wise family because they didn't have that growing up. They might be drawn to a potential partner’s flashy lifestyle. But does a flashy exterior equate to genuine financial security? How can they spot traits of financial stability if they've never known what it looks like? This logic can be applied to many different scenarios.

The cure to break free from that same old love loop comes down to being brave enough to dig into our wants. Learn what the healthy version of our desires looks like, so we don’t get lured by cheap imitations of it. Failure to do this keeps us entangled in familiar, yet potentially toxic patterns. The path to healthy, sincere, and nurturing relationships begins when we discern the real needs beneath our desires.

If you’re stuck in a loop of similar romantic choices, remember acknowledging the pattern is the first step. Dive deep within, challenge your reasoning, and aim for authentic connections. Together, we can break the cycle of déjà vu love.

[reverend-white-rabbit]

[tmarshconnors]

“They forgot that the world doesn’t run on information. People don’t make decisions based on truth or facts. They don’t spend their money based on data. They don’t connect with each other because of some higher philosophical truth. The world runs on feelings.”

Mark Manson is an American self-help author and blogger. As of 2024, he has authored or co-authored four books, three of which, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fck, Everything Is Fcked.

Bestselling Author: Mark Manson is the author of the bestselling book "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life," which was published in 2016. The book became an international sensation, topping bestseller lists and receiving widespread acclaim for its candid and no-nonsense approach to self-help.

Popular Blogger: Before writing books, Manson gained a significant following through his blog, where he shared articles on personal development, relationships, and life advice. His blog posts often challenge conventional wisdom and encourage readers to embrace discomfort and uncertainty as part of the human experience.

Philosophical Influences: Manson's writing is heavily influenced by existentialist philosophy, particularly the works of philosophers like Friedrich Nietzsche and Albert Camus. He explores themes such as the search for meaning, the nature of suffering, and the importance of personal responsibility in his writings.

Emphasis on Authenticity: Manson advocates for authenticity and honesty in all aspects of life. He encourages people to confront uncomfortable truths about themselves and their circumstances rather than seeking superficial happiness or validation.

Continued Impact: Beyond his initial success with "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fck," Manson continues to have a significant impact through his writing, speaking engagements, and online presence. He has authored other books, including "Everything Is Fcked: A Book About Hope" and "Models: Attract Women Through Honesty," and remains a prominent figure in the self-help and personal development community.

[fujupro]

Make Him Worship You: The Secret Formula to Unlock Unshakable Love and Devotion

[elfony]

Unveiling Fling: Discovering the Chemistry Behind Fling and a Turn Into Something More 💖

Dive into the intricacies of modern romance with "Fling". A captivating exploration of the chemistry that ignites fleeting connections and transforms them into something more meaningful. This insightful book delves into the dynamics of casual relationships and the potential for deeper emotional bonds to emerge. With clarity and depth, the author navigates the complexities of love, desire, and commitment, offering readers a compelling glimpse into the transformative power of connection. Whether you're navigating the early stages of romance or seeking to deepen an existing relationship, this book is your guide to understanding the alchemy of attraction and the potential for lasting love relationship to blossom.

[heartfelthints]

Navigating Modern Relationships: It’s All About Communication

In today’s fast-paced world, relationships can feel more complicated than ever. But one thing that remains constant is the importance of communication. Whether you’re in a new relationship or have been with your partner for years, here are a few key tips to keep your connection strong:

Be Honest, but Kind – Speak your truth, but remember that how you say things matters just as much as what you say.

Listen Actively – Don't just hear, but listen to understand. Let your partner feel seen and heard.

Set Boundaries – Healthy boundaries help maintain balance and mutual respect in any relationship.

Check-In Regularly – Make it a habit to ask your partner how they’re feeling, and share your feelings too.

At Heartfelt Hints, we believe that communication is the foundation of a lasting relationship. What are your thoughts on communication in relationships? Let’s discuss in the comments below!

Click here for tips to help solve everyday relationship problems!

[bychiamaka]

It is a thorn in your side, but you gotta walk with God through it. The pain is deep, but you gotta allow God to do the work in you to strengthen & develop you. It doesn’t make sense right now, but it’ll all be clear one day. Just continue to surrender to God & trust the process.

[fuckassthefrog]

I consider bringing my bf rocks sometimes he's cute and needs a little stone from time to time

[relationshipsway]

7 Ways To Improve Your Relationship

Good relationships don’t just happen. I’ve heard many of my clients state that, “If I have to work at it, then it’s not the right relationship.” This is not a true statement, any more than it’s true that you don’t have to work at good physical health through exercise, eating well, and stress reduction.

There’s a relationship “secret ingredient” that a man craves in order to feel intense, committed love. Without it, he will always keep one foot out the door.

I’ve discovered, in the 35 years that I’ve been counseling couples, 7 choices you can make that will not only improve your relationship, but can turn a failing relationship into a successful one.

TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOURSELF

This is the most important choice you can make to improve your relationship. This means that you learn how to take responsibility for your own feelings and needs. This means that instead of trying to get your partner to make you feel happy and secure, you learn how to do this for yourself through your own thoughts and actions. This means learning to treat yourself with kindness, caring, compassion, and acceptance instead of self-judgment. Self-judgment will always make you feel unhappy and insecure, no matter how wonderfully your partner is treating you.

For example, instead of getting angry at your partner for your feelings of abandonment when he or she is late, preoccupied and not listening to you, not turned on sexually, and so on, you would explore your own feelings of abandonment and discover how you might be abandoning yourself.

When you learn how to take full, 100% responsibility for yourself, then you stop blaming your partner for your upsets. Since blaming one’s partner for one’s own unhappiness is the number one cause of relationship problems, learning how to take loving care of yourself is vital to a good relationship.

KINDNESS, COMPASSION, ACCEPTANCE

Treat others the way you want to be treated. This is the essence of a truly spiritual life. We all yearn to be treated lovingly – with kindness, compassion, understanding, and acceptance. We need to treat ourselves this way, and we need to treat our partner and others this way. Relationships flourish when both people treat each other with kindness. While there are no guarantees, often treating another with kindness brings kindness in return. If your partner is consistently angry, judgmental, uncaring and unkind, then you need to focus on what would be loving to yourself rather than reverting to anger, blame, judgment, withdrawal, resistance, or compliance. Kindness to others does not mean sacrificing yourself. Always remember that taking responsibility for yourself rather than blaming others is the most important thing you can do. If you are consistently kind to yourself and your partner, and your partner is consistently angry, blaming, withdrawn and unavailable, then you either have to accept a distant relationship, or you need to leave the relationship. You cannot make your partner change – you can only change yourself.

There’s a relationship “secret ingredient” that a man craves in order to feel intense, committed love. Without it, he will always keep one foot out the door.

LEARNING INSTEAD OF CONTROLLING

When conflict occurs, you always have two choices regarding how to handle the conflict: you can open to learning about yourself and your partner and discover the deeper issues of the conflict, or you can try to win, or at least not lose, through some form of controlling behavior. We’ve all learning many overt and subtle ways of trying to control others into behaving the way we want: anger, blame, judgment, niceness, compliance, caretaking, resistance, withdrawal of love, explaining, teaching, defending, lying, denying, and so on. All the ways we try to control create even more conflict. Remembering to learn instead of control is a vital part of improving your relationship.

For example, most people have two major fears that become activated in relationships: the fear of abandonment – of losing the other - and the fear of engulfment – of losing oneself. When these fears get activated, most people immediately protect themselves against these fears with their controlling behavior. But if you chose to learn about your fears instead of attempt to control your partner, your fear would eventually heal. This is how we grow emotionally and spiritually – by learning instead of controlling.

CREATE DATE TIMES

When people first fall in love, they make time for each other. Then, especially after getting married, they get busy. Relationships need time to thrive. It is vitally important to set aside specific times to be together – to talk, play, make love. Intimacy cannot be maintained without time together.

GRATITUDE INSTEAD OF COMPLAINTS

Positive energy flows between two people when there is an “attitude of gratitude.” Constant complaints creates a heavy, negative energy, which is not fun to be around. Practice being grateful for what you have rather than focusing on what you don’t have. Complaints create stress, while gratitude creates inner peace, so gratitude creates not only emotional and relationship health, but physical health as well.

FUN AND PLAY

We all know that “work without play makes Jack a dull boy.” Work without play makes for dull relationships as well. Relationships flourish when people laugh together, play together, and when humor is a part of everyday life. Stop taking everything so seriously and learn to see the funny side of life. Intimacy flourishes when there is lightness of being, not when everything is heavy.

There’s a relationship “secret ingredient” that a man craves in order to feel intense, committed love. Without it, he will always keep one foot out the door.

SERVICE

A wonderful way of creating intimacy is to do service projects together. Giving to others fills the heart and creates deep satisfaction in the soul. Doing service moves you out of yourself and your own problems and supports a broader, more spiritual view of life.

If you and your partner agree to these 7 choices, you will be amazed at the improvement in your relationship!

[bootleg-nessie]

Petty tip: if you make a playlist for your SO change all the songs to breakup songs when you break up

[drkanusinghrajput33]

Erectile Dysfunction and Sexless Marriage: Uncover Causes and Discover Practical Solutions

Erectile Dysfunction and Sexless Marriage: Uncover Causes and Discover Practical Solutions

Erectile Dysfunction in a Sexless Marriage: Underlying Causes and Practical Solutions 1. Introduction: What to Expect from This Comprehensive Guide Welcome to this comprehensive guide on tackling erectile dysfunction (ED) in the context of a sexless marriage. This guide is designed to provide you with: Clear explanations of erectile dysfunction. Helpful insights into how ED can affect marital…