#Sexless Marriage

[theacecouple]

10 Years

Our 10 year anniversary is coming up next week, and we're planning to record a podcast episode to discuss the life changes and milestones we've experienced together!

If we also did a lil Q&A, what questions do you have for an Asexual (ace-ace) married couple of a decade?

Leave a note or drop us an ask!

[love-once-lived-here]

The incongruence of being married and constantly sexually frustrated is one hell of a life to live. I have all of this sexual energy, but nowhere to express it. Instead, I'm sitting here fantasizing about the type of husband I often hear about:

The type men are your best friend as well as your lover.

The men who kiss your forehead, smooth your hair, randomly hug you from behind.

The men who never stop saying you're sexy no matter how many years pass.

The men who still get flustered seeing you naked.

The men who still get handsy when you're all dolled up for them.

I love the "best friends" part. I really really do. But I had no way of knowing that was all I'd be left with...

[danteseroticauniverse]

What do you do when the love of your life meets a new girl friend and you find out from one of your best friends down the pub, that your lovely young wife is working as a high class escort? Not only that, she begins lying to you and pretending to be a trainee estate agent and her new friend Vivien turns out to be a black widow.

Yvette and Steve are in their mid twenties and have been married for five years but after meeting Vivien, things start to change. Enter Oscar, one of Vivien's next victims and owns a beautiful motor yacht Last temptation. Oscar then marries Vivien and invites Steve and Yvette to spend a few days on the yacht but then Steve tells Oscar what he has discovered...

[drkanusinghrajput33]

Erectile Dysfunction and Sexless Marriage: Uncover Causes and Discover Practical Solutions

Erectile Dysfunction and Sexless Marriage: Uncover Causes and Discover Practical Solutions

Erectile Dysfunction in a Sexless Marriage: Underlying Causes and Practical Solutions 1. Introduction: What to Expect from This Comprehensive Guide Welcome to this comprehensive guide on tackling erectile dysfunction (ED) in the context of a sexless marriage. This guide is designed to provide you with: Clear explanations of erectile dysfunction. Helpful insights into how ED can affect marital…

[bucsfan]

Another pathetic night having to jack off alone again. The wife went to our daughters for the night. I tried to put a quick post on Craigslist and it was removed before it even went up.

[mn2020]

[lonelystoner79]

Regaining the Power

Okay, so I've been thinking about this no sex thing a lot like alcohol. And it actually has been making me feel pretty good. I've been getting bursts of feelings - "okay, I can do this." Or maybe it just feels good because I am proactively deciding that I will not be trying to have sex with him, and then I don't have to feel sad when I get rejected. Because the rejection is never going to happen! Just like I don't have to feel bad when I drink alcohol because I'm not going to drink it!

Look, he's not an all bad guy, but I can't live like this. And he has displayed this distrust and disrespect our whole relationship. And even still, that simply does not negate the fact that he just doesn't want me that way. I feel I'm a very generous lover and want to please someone and make them happy, but he doesn't want that from me, so I really have no other choice than to find that elsewhere.

I'm going to take this time to really reflect on myself. I keep saying I need to get some hobbies. Because in a short amount of time, I will only have myself, and I need to make sure that I am a strong solid foundation by myself.

It hurts, but I have to stay focused and seize the day! Go the next right thing for ME! Stop worrying about him and his dick. He locked it up and and thew away the key.

[ebonyandrosewood]

Communication and Sex

Yesterday I watched the first episode of The Big Bang Theory's season 12. In this episode, Sheldon decides each date to have sex with Amy in advance, and puts it on the calendar shared with Amy. However, Amy hates it and their relationship gets strained. Sheldon tries to restore their relationship and he explains to Amy that he is worried that his low sex drive results in non frequent sex and it makes her feel abandoned, so he needs to schedule the date of sex in advance and be sure to have sex regularly.

I guess it is not comfortable for him to have sex with Amy even when he is not driven by sex desire. However, he decides to do it because he loves Amy. Also, Amy also feels a little uncomfortable to know that Sheldon tries to have sex with her without being driven by sexual desire, but she accepts Sheldon's way because she also loves him and she appreciates his effort. I was really impressed by their love to each other and their attitudes of valuing clear communication.

In Japan, not having sex is one of the major issues many married couples have. I think one big reason is that they do not communicate with each other about their sexual desire, such as how and how often they want to have sex. They avoid such communications because they feel somehow awkward explaining their sexual preference to their partners. I think Japanese couples should also make an effort to communicate clearly on their sexual preference and deepen their understanding of one another.

[confessionofaboredhousewife]

Warning rant ahead:

I just wanna feel desired. I just wanna feel wanted. I just wanna feel passion. I just wanna feel obsessed over. I just wanna feel lusted over. I just wanna feel like I've been set on fire. I wanna feel coveted.

But I am not a woman who is.

[love-once-lived-here]

It's crazy to think that just three years ago, I was that bright-eyed, head over heels, "do anything just to see him smile" kind of girl.

I was endlessly motivated to fill his days with as much love as I could fit, plus more:

Cooking and cleaning, even after a full day of work at my job.

Making his work lunchboxes with cute little notes hidden inside.

Making an effort to enjoy his passions (or, at the very least, be positive/supportive about them).

Going the extra mile to learn about his personality, his past, what makes him tick.

Noticing those fleeting desires he mentions only once or twice in a year, remembering them as potential future gifts.

I'd no joke start every day thinking to myself:

How can I be a better girlfriend/fiancé/wife to him today?

How can I love him better today?

How can I show I'm as madly in love with him now as I was at the start?

If he asked me for a favor or our wants misaligned?

I'd typically forgo my wants in favor of his

I'd typically pause my rest or lazy moment to meet his request

I'd think to myself: "What's a temporary discomfort/inconvenience when it brings him comfort, happiness, or just a genuine smile?

I didn't do any of those things because I felt required to. I didn't do them because I felt afraid to do otherwise. I did them because I fully trusted/believed that, if the roles were reversed, he would always try to do the same for me. I did them because I believed we both aimed to give as well as receive.

Those parts of me didn't gradually die from me falling out of love with him. Those parts of me began to die as I slowly realized that life was a dream when he asked and I gave. But that things quickly soured if I asked him to give...

[danteseroticauniverse]

[onehotmessposts]

I published my new episode Rekindling the Flame: Overcoming a Sexless Marriage, please check it out

[soberfructosecornsyrup]

Sexless Marriage - This is Not Love on pink splatter

Thought I missed out on this but Deathwish had more up for sale and I now have a job so here we are. Love the album cover.

[mn2020]

[lonelystoner79]

The Decision

Okay, so per suggestions via Reddit and a book that was suggested, I am taking sex off the table for myself. I will give him just as much affection as he gives me - nothing but pets and pecks. And I'm staying clear of his dick. Abstain, and focus on myself. Sad to think that in reality the next time I'll most likely have sex will probably be a couple years from now, and not with him. Ouch.

If he wanted it, he would come get it, but he doesn't. So I'm going to stop putting myself out there. Just like alcohol, I wake up everyday and decide to NOT drink. I will wake up everyday and decide NOT to have sex with my husband, or think sexual thoughts about him, or desire him.

I really need to get a hobby too to keep my mind off things, but what to pick up? I feel most things won't keep my interest very long.

"Do the next right thing." That phrase is what got me through my first 24 hours without alcohol. And I need to remember that right now, when I feel intrusive thoughts slipping through (not good enough; comparing myself to thirst traps), just focus on myself and DO something for myself! Cross something off my to-do like, stretch, do a household chore, or better yet, get the fuck out of the house and away from him! Alcohol isn't in the house and it's easier because it's not right in my face, so I also need to limit my exposure to him. I'm hoping to get more hours at work. And I need to fit going to the gym into my daily schedule. Even an hour a day just to begin, get me out of the house and moving! Well at least this depression is making me loose weight since I don't really have an appetite, just a giant pit in my stomach.

Anyway, I feel better after writing this, off to do the next right thing, and be appreciative of this day and all that it has to offer.

[oh-dear-so-queer]

Mr Ormrod ruled that marriage existed only between men and women, that sex was established at birth or earlier, by so-called 'biological' factors, and that neither medicine nor surgery could create 'a person who is naturally capable of performing the essential role of a woman in marriage'.

In an attempt to create clarity, Mr Ormrod managed to sow confusion: 'naturally', 'capable', 'performing', 'essential', 'role', 'woman' and 'woman in marriage' – every word begged a question. This rather coy definition of womanhood excludes infertile women (if he was referring to conception) and sexless marriages (if he was meaning penile penetration). It says nothing about people who are born with hormonal or genital variations – the very people who were first supposed to be served by medicine or surgery. Not for the last time did it seem easier to pronounce on transgender issues than to think about them.

"Normal Women: 900 Years of Making History" - Philippa Gregory