#Penn Cake

[savage-kult-of-gorthaur]

POOR GRAHAM -- HIS FATE IS SEALED AS DELICIOUS SUSTENANCE.

PIC(S) INFO: Inspired by Denny's diner fare and the Garbage Pail Kids trading cards of yore, artwork by Justin Gammon for the official Dennys Tumblr blog, c. 2016.

"I never talk about it much, but believe it or not, coming up with new content every single day for a corporate Tumblr page isn’t easy. Well, let me clarify – making good content isn’t easy.

So, once I made all the food puns I could,  I decided to take things up a notch. I paid tribute my introduction to puns – the Garbage Pail Kids. The fun, gross and over-the-top cards were a staple for most 80s kids. They’ve always stuck with me, so I finally had the time and reason to paint my very own. I proudly present to you, the “Diner Booth Kids.” Just like the original GPK cards, I created an A and B version with alternate names – “Graham Slam” ( a play off of Denny’s iconic breakfast, “The Grand Slam”) and “Penn Cake.”

-- JUSTIN GAMMON (illustrator + designer)

Source: https://justingammon.com/dennys-digs-up-gpk.

[thunderstomm]

I’m nothing without you

Well maybe not nothing, But a whole lot less - It’s true…!

[rifewithrifles]

Penn State Blue Band stimboard (x) (x) (x) - (x) (x) - (x) (x) (x)

[wouldntyou-liketoknow]

My EgoPats Meeting the Canon EgoPats (Brought To You by Incorrect Quotes)

Yep, I finally decided that this post deserved to be expanded on. So, to absolutely no-one's surprise, I gave it the ol' college try with memes.

___

[Caliban has just returned from visiting Theory Manor. He’s now ranting to Murdock about WarfPat]

Caliban: Listen to what one of my STUPID doppelgängers did! Caliban: Apparently one of his “guests” ended up dying in his studio, and he offered the body to me. And since we’ve been in-between jobs lately, I was like, “Sure, why not?” Caliban: So, I cooked the best parts, then I went to town. . .and every two minutes, he added salt. Caliban: And it was weird. It almost tasted like sweet potato. Caliban: I asked, “Did this guy eat a lot of candy before he died? Or was he on drugs?” Caliban: And Warf said, “Noooo.” Caliban: Every two minutes, he added salt, salt, sALT, SALT! It was like he wanted to poison me! Caliban: And when I finished eating, he asked, “How did you like the human flesh wiTH SUGAR?” Caliban: . . .HE USED SUGAR INSTEAD OF SALT! Caliban: *starts shaking Murdock by the lapels of his overcoat* SUGAAAAAAAAAAR!!!!!!!

___

[The EgoPats are using an Ouija board] The Detective: Tell us. . .is there an otherworldly creature in this house or on its grounds? LeviathanPat: *is right outside the nearest window, but has decided to use his powers to speak through the board before he actually starts talking* ¥ê§. MadPat: Great! Rent is due on the first of the month. WarfPat: Oh, and movie night is on Friday if you want to hang out. LeviathanPat: *genuinely caught off-guard* . . .Wåï†, WHĆ—?!

___

Mack: So, for that party I told the guys about. . .do you, uh. . . Patty/DancePat: Oh, are you not sure how to dress for it? Mack: *panicked* WHAT IS CLOTHES???

___

[Caliban and The Hermit’s first meeting is going pretty well.]

The Hermit: —and then I said, “I didn’t realize that I would be having some guests. . .for dinner!” Caliban: *laughs* Ah, that’s a classic! Mack: *watching from a distance and ranting to The Detective* —no nO NO, we are NOT dealing with TWO OF THEM!

___

WarfPat: Hey, new guy! Trick or ye— LeviathanPat: *conjures an Uno Reserve card* ñÖ

___

The Detective: If I have to clean one more bloodstain from this carpet, I’m going to murder someone. Caliban: Sounds a little counterproductive.

___

The Detective: I'm not doing too well. Penn/Pennsylvania: What's wrong? The Detective: I have this headache that comes and goes. [LeviathanPat manifests outside the nearest window] The Detective: And there it is again.

___

The Hermit: What is toothpaste if not bone soap? Caliban: . . .You are a complete and total treasure. Never let anyone tell you otherwise.

___

Penn/Pennsylvania: We call that a traumatic experience. Penn/Pennsylvania: *turning to The Detective* Not a “bruh moment” Penn/Pennsylvania: *turning to The Hermit* Not “sadge” Pennsylvania: *turning to MadPat* And DEFINITELY not “oof lmao”

___

Mack: *scoffs* Clearly, you don’t own an air fryer. Clearly. Caliban: *chuckles dryly* I’m not gonna be talked down to by some arrogant, condescending, delusions-of-grandeur-prone SIDE-DISH. Caliban: If you want to insult me, go right ahead. But you have no idea how brutal that’s gonna get. You don’t even know my name! Caliban: *steps closer to Mack, almost getting in his face* I ' m t h e c o m b i n a t i o n o f y o u a n d a c r a z y i s l a n d h e r m i t f r o m a d i f f e r e n t t i m e l i n e .

___

The Detective: Define “dream”. LeviathanPat: Ðrêåm—†hê £ïr§† †hïñg þêðþlê åßåñÐðñ whêñ †hê¥ lêårñ hðw †hê wðrlÐ wðrk§. The Hermit: Oh, c’mon! That’s just too dark!

___

Ness: Do you support LGBTQIA+ rights? Patty/DancePat: . . .I’m literally a girlypop and exotic dancer?? WarfPat: He’s avoiding the question!

___

MadPat: Gatekeep, girlboss, and. . .what's the other one again? LeviathanPat: †hêrê ï§ñ'† åñð†hêr ðñê. ¥ðµ'rê ¢råz¥.

___

Patty/DancePat: He doesn’t deserve you! If he doesn’t treat you right by now, you’re gone! Ness: *taking a deep breath* I’m gone. Patty/DancePat: *nodding and grinning* Now gO CHOP HIS DICK OFF—

___

Penn/Pennsylvania: I can’t tell if you’re a genius or just incredibly arrogant. Mack: Well, on a good day, I’m both.

___

[The EgoPats are discussing a plan. Ozzie has taken his turn to speak, standing with a whiteboard at the head of the room] Ozzie: Anyone have any questions? Ness: Is this legal? Ozzie: . . .Anyone have any relevant questions?

___

The Detective: Are you seriously making human-bacon for breakfast?! Caliban: *looking away from the bacon-filled frying pan he’s using* Yeah. What’d you have for breakfast? The Detective: . . .Nothing. Caliban: *shrugs, returning his focus to the frying pan* I’m doing better than you, man.

___

Penn/Pennsylvania: What’s up with you? Mack: What do you mean? Penn/Pennsylvania: You’ve been nice and helpful and considerate all day. What’s your game?

___

[The Detective recently griped to Caliban about a recent case. Now Caliban is trying to convince The Detective to do something highly unconventional to make progress with said case.l]

Caliban: DO IT! The Detective: NOOOOO! GOD, PLEASE NO! Caliban: MAKE YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE! The Detective: NO! Caliban: JUST— The Detective: NO! Caliban: — D O I T ! The Detective: N O O O O O O O ! ! !

___

Patty/DancePat: I can't believe you've done this. . . Ness: I'm sorry, I didn't know—! Patty/DancePat: *on the verge of tears* YOU CAN'T JUST BUY ME A GIFT OUT OF NOWHERE WHEN I HAVE NOTHING PREPARED FOR YOU IN RETURN! NOW I FEEL LIKE A HUGE JERK!

___

The Hermit: Onion rings are vegetable donuts. Mack: Sure. . . The Hermit: Your stomach thinks all potatoes are mashed. Mack: Okay? The Hermit: Lasagna is spaghetti flavored cake. Mack: . . . The Hermit: Lobsters are mermaid scorpio— Mack: Jesus, that one is a little— Caliban: *was just passing through but is now interested* No, no. Let him continue

___

[A plan involving paranormal investigation has gone terribly wrong, and The Detective is almost out of options]

The Detective: *begrudgingly holding a dark ritual* If you are here, speak to us! LeviathanPat: *slowly manifests outside the window. . .and starts singing “Don’t Stop Believin’.” With each lyric, his voice shifts in a very disturbing way* JÚ§† Ä Ç̆-Ä¥ ßÖ¥! The Detective: *grinds his jaw, having even more regrets than before* LeviathanPat: ßÖRñ ÄñÐ RÄ̧ÈÐ Ìñ §ÖÚ†H—!

___

WarfPat: What kinds of sounds annoy you? Ozzie: Are we talkin’ real sounds or imaginary ones? WarfPat: *now interested* Lets say imaginary. Ozzie: Spiders wearin’ flip flops.

___

[MadPat is trying to talk killer-to-killer with Caliban. So far, he’s only succeeded in annoying Caliban]

MadPat: Every time I go out there, I feel like I do my best and they don’t! Caliban: *has heard all about how sloppy Mad’s methods are, how much evidence Mad always seems to leave behind, as well as how Mad trapped himself in a fire only to get caught by the police* Let me ask you a very fair question—What do you do successfully? MadPat: . . . Caliban: *raising an eyebrow* QUICKLY. MadPat: *scowls and storms off*

___

The Detective: You need a hobby. LeviathanPat: Ì ålrêåÐ¥ håvê å hðßߥ! The Detective: Terrorizing people is nOT A HOBBY!

___

Ness: Ducks are better than rabbits. Penn/Pennsylvania: What? Rabbits are adorable. Have you ever been in a fight with a duck? Ducks are jerks. WarfPat: Duck is delicious! Rabbit is all gamey. Ness: We’re not talking about flavor, Warf! WarfPat: Flavor counts! The Detective: Who carries around a duck’s foot for good luck? Anyone? Mack: You wrap yourself in a comforter stuffed with rabbit hair. I’ll wrap myself in a comforter stuffed with duck feathers. Who’s cozier? Penn/Pennsylvania: Okay, but— Mack: NO, NO, NO, NO. WHO’S COZIER? MadPat: Why don’t we just take a rabbit and a duck, stick ‘em in a cardboard box and let them fight it out? Penn/Pennsylvania: BECAUSE THAT’S ILLEGAL! MadPat: ONLY IF WE BET ON IT! Caliban: *sitting in the adjacent room, listening in on the debate. He’s not sure if Snare could get roped into it, because Snare is a hare and not a rabbit, but he’s still holding him protectively* . . .

___

Ness: *calling up the stairs from the kitchen* I made lightly-fried fish fillets for dinner! The Detective: . . .Ness, it’s one-fifteen AM. What the hell? Ness: Do you guys want the lightly-fried fish fillets or not? Ozzie: *pokes his head out of one of the guest rooms* Well, I mean, yeah. Ness: So come downstairs before they get cold. Penn/Pennsylvania: *comes out of another guest room* Wait, you just made them? Ness: Yeah, I wasn’t tired, so I decided to make lightly-fried fish fillets. LeviathanPat: *has been watching/listening to all of this through the kitchen window* §å¥ "lïgh†l¥-£rïêÐ £ï§h £ïllꆧ" ðñê mðrê †ïmê.

___

Patty/DancePat: When you’re shopping at Lush and another customer comes in and bites one of the soap options because they think it’s cheese. . .I talked to one of the employees about it, and apparently this sort of thing happens way more frequently than you’d think. Mack: Well, if Lush stopped literally presenting soap as deli food, then this wouldn't happen so frequently. Patty/DancePat: Who goes into a bath store and thinks something covered in glitter is cheese??? The Detective: . . .Who goes to the deli section of a store and just takes a bite out of the cheese?!

___

[MadPat keeps trying to antagonize Caliban, as if THAT will somehow change Caliban’s opinion of him]

MadPat: *pacing the floor in front of Caliban* And I’m not gonna conversate with you! I’m not gonna invest time in— Caliban: *organizing some Black Market stuff on his laptop, not paying Mad too much attention* I think it’s “converse.” MadPat: . . .Huh? Caliban: *rolling his eyes* Just say “talk.”

___

Penn/Pennsylvania: I haven't slept in seventy-three hours. Ozzie: Eighty. Democratically elected leader of insomnia over here. MadPat: Bitch, it's been ninety for me. I'm going for an even one hundred. Ness: . . .You guys can be terrifying sometimes.

___

The Detective: Oh, you’re back from that outing. What’d you think of that Patty guy? Ness: I can’t remember how we got on the topic of beaches, but he referred to sand as "heterosexual glitter." The Detective: . . . Ness: I don't know how someone so awesome can be so anxious all the time!

___

Mack: You’re making fun of me now, aren’t you? Ozzie: What? Oh, no-no-no, Mack. I’d never���*suddenly points past Mack* MACK LOOK IT’S CALIBAN! Mack: *turns around in a panic* WHERE?! [As it turns out, Caliban is, in fact, nowhere to be seen] Mack: *blinks, pretty much frozen in place* Ozzie: *falls to the floor, laughing hysterically*

___

The Hermit: Let's all agree that going up the stairs on all fours is actually the best experience on earth. Penn/Pennsylvania: Conversely, going down the stairs on all fours is actually the most terrifying experience on earth.

___

Patty/DancePat: Yeah, so, my latest shift at the club was a little rough. Heh. . . Ness: *concerned* Why are you looking up? Patty/DancePat: I need to CRY, but my foundation cost FORTY-EIGHT DOLLARS.

___

The Hermit: How do ethical philosophers feel about murder? Ness: Well. . .I mean, it’s frowned upon. Caliban: Yeah, but what if the reason you want to murder someone is to make your life easier? The Hermit: *nodding along* That’s okay, right?

___

LeviathanPat: ¥ðµ kñðw whå† Ì’vê rêålïzêÐ? The Detective: Some thoughts are better left unsaid? LeviathanPat: ñï¢ê †r¥, åñ¥w套

___

Ness: So they were just using me? Penn/Pennsylvania: I’m sorry, Ness. Mack: *trying to contain his amusement* You must feel pretty stupid right now. Ness: . . . Penn/Pennsylvania: Okay, that’s a time-out. Mack: No, I was just trying to— Caliban: *using his meat cleaver to gesture to the corner of the room* Go sit over there! Mack: *walks away in defeat*

___

Mack: *entering the room, unable to see what's going on just yet* I’m going to dunk on you— Patty/DancePat: *is wearing heels AND is currently practicing some new pole-dancing moves* You’d better bring a ladder, then.

___

The Detective: *exhausted from supernatural shenanigans* Please, God, just let me have one peaceful day?! LeviathanPat: Öh m¥ GðÐ, ¥ðµ ågåïñ? Gïvê ï† å r꧆, ßµÐÐ¥! The Detective: I WASN’T TALKING TO YOU!

___

Penn/Pennsylvania: A riddle for you, my friend! So it’s raining, right? And you pass a bus stop. There are three people there—your most trustworthy friend, a pregnant lady who needs to go to the hospital, and the person of your dreams. However, your smart car only fits two people. What do you do? Ness: Oh, I’ve heard this one before! You lend the car to your friend so they can take the pregnant lady to the hospital, and then you stay at the bus stop with your dream person! Penn/Pennsylvania: Oh, so close, but wrong. The correct answer is as follows—you go home and reEVALUATE YOUR DAMN LIFE! Penn/Pennsylvania: *grabs Ness by the collar and starts playfully shaking him* YOU! BOUGHT! A! SMART! CAR!

___

[Caliban leads Mack over to a closet]

Mack: *walks into the closet* Um. . .what’s in here? Caliban: Oh, it’s just—*turns the room’s light off and grabs the door handle* —YOUR DEMISE. Mack: AHHHHH—! Caliban: *slams the door and locks it*

___

@sammys-magical-au @insane4fandoms @b-is-in-the-closet

[tabeojacafe]

All Healer-type Tabegami recipe thumbnails.

[totheseafront]

Penn Badgley in The Birthday Cake

[foodwithrecipes]

Lunch without rice also seems incomplete. If there is pulao or biryani made of rice in the food, then the beauty of the plate increases further. Along with this, the taste of food also increases. For Biryani, Read more

[eldrichhorrornyaa]

@bisexualcharmanderenergy i need your take on this

omg ok put in the tags a food that makes u feel like life is worth living when you eat it. like u eat it and it’s soo good and everything’s fine actually

[saucy-mesothelioma]

This may be the greatest game show moment of all time

[confetti-critter]

Had a momence at the store where I brought up that I thought a certain item was a lower price and followed the cashier to check and he showed me that the price was per 100g and I'm trying not to beat myself up abt it.

[hellonew-yorkgirl]

2. Die Bahnfahrt nach New York und ein erster langer Spaziergang auf der Highline

[tricktster]

my bestie (a man raised in an extremely wealthy connecticut suburb who is generally very capable of remarkable physical endeavors but also does have to wear watershoes in the river to protect his soft nobleman’s feet from the rocks [which I mention only to provide important context for later]) texted me last night to complain that he was in the unpleasant underground pseudo-mall that is penn station waiting for his very delayed train, had purchased a lot of depressing train station food to occupy himself during the wait, had then indulged in a particularly bleak feast for one, and now was uncomfortably full and very cranky.

Naturally I asked him what he’d eaten, then thought better of it and asked if he could describe his feast like George R. R. Martin would. He told me that describing it like GRRM it would make him feel unwell, but nonetheless shared what he’d eaten because he is a good friend.

Because I am a bad friend, I then described his food at him like GRRM.

(it was a bag of pretzels and two Reese Big Cups with potato chips inside and a brownie and a slice of chocolate cake with pink frosting)

(i know i used facsimile twice in one sentence but i was doing this entirely off the cuff so i apologize for nothing)

[bellyasks]

menu for a restaurant that specializes in overstuffing its customers (aka a silly prompt list)

Ask your server about dietary accommodations. Each meal is made to order, substitutions and alternative ingredients are available! All meats may be replaced with plant-based alternatives upon request. (And pick a meal to feed your favorite character--if they can finish it, they get one dessert on the house!)

Breakfast (all orders come with a side of home fries, fresh fruit, or your choice of meat)

Full Stack of Pancakes - Emphasis on "full." Lucky seven big fluffy pancakes, each with a different additive of your choice.

Big Ol' Bagel - A hefty bagel the size of your plate, toasted to order and topped with whatever you'd like.

Ostrich Egg Omelette - Okay, not really, but this omelette is made with two dozen eggs--the equivalent of one ostrich egg--and filled with your choice of meat and veggies.

Loaf of French Toast - A dozen thick slices of French toast topped with whipped cream and fresh berries.

Plus Size Pork Roll - A classic pork roll egg & cheese on our signature giant bagel.

Lunch (all orders come with a side of chips or fries)

Peanut Butter & Jelly Belly - The biggest PB&J you've ever seen, slathered generously on a buttery toasted baguette.

Quadruple Decker Club Sandwich - Your choice of meat with mayo, lettuce, tomato, and bacon, heaped on between four slices of bread.

Piece-A Pizza - This slice is equivalent in size to an entire large pizza and covered with your choice of toppings. Perfect for people who are lying to themselves when they say they'll just have one piece.

Double Footlong - Two feet of classic Italian hoagie on a fresh-baked roll.

Stomach Stretcher - They say eating a head of lettuce is a great way to stretch your stomach out, and that's exactly what this giant salad will do. We bring you the lettuce, you take it to the salad bar and add the rest.

Dinner (all orders come with a side of rice, fries, baked or mashed potato, or a fresh vegetable medley unless marked *)

Sushi Bloat Boat - A sushi boat big enough for a full table, pricey to share but free for any one person who manages to finish it alone.

Box of Pasta - A full 16oz box of pasta (your choice of spaghetti, penne, or linguine) tossed in Alfredo, marinara, or a white wine sauce. Add your choice of meat for an extra $2.

Full Size Fish & Chips* - An entire 10-20lb cod (ask your server about choosing a fish) cleaned, battered, fried, and served with steak fries.

The Whole Farm* - A barbecue variety platter. Pulled pork, brisket, ribs, and chicken breast slathered in our signature sauce, with an ear of corn, baked beans, and coleslaw on the side.

Raised Steak - A 48oz grilled ribeye. Also available as an equivalent weight of seasoned and grilled portobello mushrooms.

Dessert

Paint Can - A creamy and colorful milkshake served in a one gallon paint can. See the ice cream counter for today's available flavors.

Loaf of Bread Pudding - Warm bread pudding made with an entire loaf of bread, topped with an optional scoop of vanilla ice cream.

Root Beer Bloat - A classic float with your choice of ice cream. The twist is that this dessert holds two liters of root beer and a portion of ice cream to match.

Burp-day Cake - A seven-layer slice of chocolate cake guaranteed to be the size of your head or it's free, topped with a thick crust of fizzy Pop Rocks.

Gobbler Cobbler - A pie-sized dish of peach, blueberry, or apple cobbler, topped with three optional scoops of vanilla ice cream.

[qiu-yan]

ok so i found the collab cafe the jiang cheng roll cake is from. and here's the full menu:

english translations (from the wiki):

wei wuxian:

Food: Wei Wuxian's Red Curry (red curry, rice, fried chicken, vegetables, monaka) Drink: Mixed Berry Lassie (strawberry lassie, blueberries, strawberry sauce)

lan wangji:

Food: Lan Wangji's Jingshi and Cold Springs Plate (chocolate brownies, whipped cream, strawberries, cotton candy, vanilla and chocolate ice cream, blue jelly, matcha powder, mint, monaka) Drink: Blue Soda (blue soda, lemon)

lan xichen:

Food: Lan Xichen's One Soup and Three Dishes Vegetarian Plate (simmered ganmodoki and green beans with white dressing, deep-fried tofu, clear soup, multigrain bread) Drink: Blue Elderberry Tea (blue elderberry and butterfly pea flower tea, lemon)

jiang cheng:

Food: Jiang Cheng's Zidian Roll Cake (purple rolled cake, grape ice cream, mint, plum berry sauce, whipped cream, monaka) Drink: Grape Soda (grape soda, crackling candy)

jin guangyao:

Food: Jin Guangyao's Hospitality Lunch Box: chirashi sushi, kinpira burdock, hijiki, fried chicken and shrimp, weiner, vegetables, cream puffs, strawberries, monaka) Drink: Citrus Tea (black tea, orange, lemon, mint)

jin zixuan:

Food: Send Me Your Thoughts! Carrot Mousse Cake Handmade by Jin Zixuan (carrot mousse, whipped cream, blue sauce, sugar pearls, mint, monaka) Drink: Lemonade (lemonade, lemon, mint)

jiang yanli:

Food: Jiang Yanli's Gratin (penne gratin, salad, edible flower, monaka) Drink: Strawberry Milk (strawberry milk, strawberries, whipped cream, strawberry sauce, mint)

[wouldntyou-liketoknow]

My EgoPats Meeting the Canon EgoPats

I saw @insane4fandoms post their thoughts on how the EgoPats would each react when Ness came along as the new kid in the fandom. So, I guess you could say I got inspired. Here's a list of each official EgoPat and each of my fanmade blorbo's (Caliban, Patty, Penn, Ozzie, and LeviathanPat's) thoughts on them.

(I've made a bunch of incorrect quotes to reflect these ideas! Go here if you'd like to see them!)

___

Ness

It'd make a lot of sense for my boys to meet Ness via simply eating at Sparky's. After all, they each need to travel sometimes for their work: Patty's gone on many tours and counting with Delux and the rest of his coworkers at the club, Penn goes on an excavation trip with his team or Illinois at least once a month, Ozzie's learned to cover long distances in short times with all the prison-escapes he's pulled off, Caliban has visited several states numerous times in order to complete a hit-job (whether he's managing it himself or is accompanying Murdock, Azalea or any other members of The Pentas Family). . .

In any case, a roadtrip is fundamentally incomplete without pausing to visit a cozy-looking diner. And it's pretty obvious that my fanegos would all enjoy the fun, uplifting vibes that Ness gives off.

Caliban would find Ness' energy to be refreshing. Since he spends a generous amount of time butchering/preparing his own "food," he knows how to appreciate all the things restaurant workers do. (Plus, I can absolutely see him offering some sly, semi-well-hidden puns in response to the typical jokes Ness likes to make with most customers.) And since the Black Market stuff Caliban is involved with makes such a pretty penny, you just know he leaves some quality tips.

Penn would like Ness' spirit. I know I haven't gone too in-depth with his backstory, but I think waiting tables was one of the many odd-jobs Penn worked while he was still studying for his paleontology/archeology degree. And it's safe to say that he probably didn't enjoy it as much as Ness seems to enjoy his job. So, Penn would respect him for taking such a stressful job in stride. He'd also give excellent tips! He would even if he didn't make a lot of money from his fossil-related projects.

Despite the persona he puts on while dancing, Patty is the type of person who gets nervous whenever he has to order something (I would know, I'm the same way). That being said, he'd really appreciate how kind and cheerful Ness is. The lighthearted banter Ness brings to the table would put Patty at ease. Yep, he'd give some above average tips as well.

Ozzie didn't have very many good experiences with restaurants when he first started out. That hasn't exactly changed nowadays, so you better believe that he knows to be grateful when he finds a joint where the owners/staff don't automatically seem judgemental or suspicious of him. Hell, he'd even take a generous amount of money from his personal stash to leave as the tip. (I think I'm just trying to say that my boys know how to treat retail/food workers.)

___

The Detective

Because I guess I'm predictable—it'd be impossible for the classic Hannibal Lecter And Will Graham schtick to not fall between Caliban and The Detective. (Of course, Caliban isn't nearly as arrogant as Hannibal, and The Detective most likely wouldn't slip into a corruption arc similar to Will's, but you get the idea.) I can see it now: The Detective putting on a pokerface whenever in Caliban's presence, speaking in a clipped tone, trying to keep an eye on Caliban every minute until they part ways. . .Meanwhile, Caliban would be all-too-happy to try and make The Detective question himself, casually recounting the hit-jobs he's worked on with Murdock, making morbid jokes left, right, and center, occasionally using his experience to offer some surprisingly sound advice for one of The Detective's cases. . .

At first, Ozzie would be very much iffy about interacting with The Detective. Sure, his crimes are merely petty ones (in a relative sense), but he's still mistrusting of anyone who works in law-related fields. Fortunately, my personal headcanon is that The Detective is more of a private consultant who doesn't work with cops unless he absolutely has to, so once Ozzie learns that, he might try to engage with him just a teensy bit. For all the stunts he's pulled, Ozzie has always made a point to never, NEVER hide out at a circus. That'd just be inviting some horror-movie-level shenanigans that he neither needs nor wants to deal with. So, it's safe to say that he'd be pretty sympathetic with The Detective's clown-induced trauma.

Patty would have sort of the same outlook. Considering how exotic work can sometimes be on the grittier side, he's had to talk to a fair amount of authorities. And, as I'm sure you can guess, not all of those authorities were too respectful towards him. But The Detective is nothing like those worse examples, and once Patty saw that, he'd be happy to get to know him. Still somewhat shy, but that's just how Patty is with most people outside of the club.

Penn would be fascinated by all of The Detective's stories (granted, he'd feel awful about the terror The Detective had to go through, but still). Considering he's used to only seeing obscure, somewhat magical/cursed stuff whenever he's working with Illinois, Penn would likely call up the aforementioned adventurer and tell him about what he heard from The Detective. Y'know, to see if Illinois has ever discovered anything similar.

LeviathanPat would mostly see The Detective as just another mortal to toy with. I say mostly, because he could still sense all the supernatural juju clinging to The Detective's mind thanks to his past. And he'd just delight in trying to break that mind into a thousand little pieces. . .good thing The Detective already has experience dealing with crimes against nature, at least. . .

___

Mack

Oh damn. Caliban would have So. Much. FUN picking on Mack. Making vague little threats, lurking around corners, fidgeting with his meat cleaver in plain view. . .it'd get to the point where Caliban would just have to flash a sly, sharp-toothed grin in order to send Mack running the other way. That being said, Caliban wouldn't go out of his way to fully harm Mack; remember, while he is insane, he's still logical enough to not want to butcher someone who looks almost exactly like him. But he'd see all his scare tactics as a way to teach Mack some manners. There's always a bigger fish, after all.

I feel like Penn and Mack would have an interesting dynamic. Thank to his career in paleontology, Penn's already seen a generous amount of strange/unique creatures (or, what's left of them, that is). Meanwhile, despite his primary role on the Invincible II, it's very likely that Mack would end up researching or interacting with various alien lifeforms. So, yeah, those two could potentially have some fun comparing notes. Then again, we know Mack's general attitude, and Penn is the type to not have much patience for stuff like that. "Okay, well, this isn't going anywhere. I'll come back if you decide to stop being a prick for a few minutes."

Same goes for Patty's case with Mack. Now, my dear poledancer girlypop is very much empathetic, and he's always trying to be open-minded. Everyone's lives are different, right? Everyone's dealing with all sorts of things, which can obviously influence behavior in various ways. And while it wouldn't take Patty very long to realize how Mack's egotistical mean-streak is likely the result of something deeper (my personal headcanon is that Mack has some serious self-esteem issues and might think that acting the way he does is just another defense mechanism), that doesn't mean he's just gonna let himself be talked down to. (And perhaps Mack could be just a smidge dazzled by Patty, since I think that would be hilarious to see. Plus, I mean, come on. Have you SEEN Patty? If he's not a nice little dazzling boy then I don't know what is.)

Ozzie's opinion also wouldn't be too high. Back when he was still living on the streets, having to dodge cars and pick pockets in order to survive, he'd lost count of all the people who would scoff and look down their noses as they passed him by. Well, Mack reminds Ozzie of those people, so he won't hesitate to call him out (and mock him right back) whenever he's being annoying.

___

The Hermit

Caliban and The Hermit would trade recipes. Because of course they would. In fact, Caliban would probably see meeting The Hermit as a weird-yet-lucky coincidence. Another cannibal to interact with, plus not having to worry about extra competition in the underground business? Awesome! And, on a more wholesome note: The Hermit would be all about giving Snare all the pets and treats he deserves. Caliban, meanwhile, would be intrigued by The Hermit's pet bats.

Due to all the fossil-digging stuff, it'd be difficult for Penn to not be an outdoorsman. Therefore, he'd be very impressed by The Hermit's tales of surviving in the wild. He'd be concerned at first, but then would swiftly realize just how much of a tough cookie The Hermit truly is.

Ozzie would be in a similar boat. He's had to camp out in the woods a few times while running away from cops, but he knows he couldn't handle that as long as The Hermit apparently has. So, he'd have some serious respect for the scrungly feral man.

Patty's relationship with The Hermit would be much more on the random side, but still very wholesome. Why? Well, if The Hermit happened to see Patty practicing his dance routines, he'd probably applaud and go, "Wowie! I've climbed a lotta trees, but I don't think I could pull off all those spinnin' tricks!" (Keep in mind that this would be completely innocent. Nothing more.) Patty, of course, would be flattered by the compliment. What's more, he'd find The Hermit's comment about tree-climbing adorable.

___

MadPat

Most of my EgoPats would have similar reactions to MadPat: "Nope." "Don't engage." "Avoid eye-contact."

. . .Well, except for Caliban. Because, despite the two of them being killers, Caliban wouldn't be very impressed by Mad. From his perspective, Mad's methods are sloppy (and he's got a point. Seasoned Random Encounters fans have seen how much evidence Mad left in/around the pizzeria). And for another thing, Mad is just kinda irresponsible? Like, yeah, Caliban can see the appeal of arson, but he's met other arsonists who didn't accidentally burn themselves like slices of toast. It would get to a point where Caliban would just be irritated by Mad's antics.

LeviathanPat would also have an. . .odd view of Mad. Primarliy due to how brazen he is. Like, I haven't gone super in-depth with Leviathan's lore, but he definitely had a hand in crafting insanity as a concept. Leviathan breathes surreal dread. He's eaten the odd star or two back in the day (as in, pre-pre B.C.) His shape is almost constantly shifting because just one glance at what he truly looks like would launch enough trauma to make your brain grind itself into a paste! And for a mortal like Mad to just. . .not. Be. Afraid of him? To try and make unhinged smalltalk with him? To be calm and even excited while looking at all the nightmare-fuel that LeviathanPat is literally made out of?! One part of LeviathanPat just might (and that's a colossal might) be impressed by Mad's apparent fortitude. Another part would end up being annoyed by Mad, probably likening him to a mosquito. (Sneaking this in because @insane4fandoms put a particular little gem into a recent doodle page with some of my bois. Thanks so much, friendo).

___

WarfPat

Most of my boys would instinctually know to not get too close to Warf. Even Caliban feels the need to walk on eggshells around him. (Sure, he's had to deal with the insanity of others; and like I said before, he has some insanity himself. But Warf is in a completely different ballpark, so. . .yeah.)

The reason I barely mentioned LevianthanPat with any of the previous egos is because he'd see them as a handful of more hopeless little mortals to try his luck with luring closer to the next window he chooses to lurk behind. . .except for WarfPat, that is. Even though he'd deny it, I think LeviathanPat would be ever-so-slightly intrigued by him. That guy's got the mind-breaking stuff that eldritch abominations specialize in, after all. Therefore, the outer monstrosity would be curious; perhaps he'd even settle for just chatting with Warf rather than trying to trick him.

___

@sammys-magical-au @b-is-in-the-closet

[tabeojacafe]

All Fighter-type Tabegami recipe thumbnails.