#I always feel so bad for her when I rewatch all you need is cake

[thunderstomm]

I’m nothing without you

Well maybe not nothing, But a whole lot less - It’s true…!

[hauntedbydreams]

Just a thought I can’t get out of my head since rewatching S2 for the billionth time…

Thinking abt how Vi doesn’t forget Caitlin’s rifle when she fights Ambessa and brings it back to the greenhouse where Warwick is.

That’s like the equivalent of modern!Vi grabbing your purse for you when you forget it. She pretends she hates carrying your purse for you, though it’s not even that girly (you prefer black or red leather bags). But secretly she loves it cause let’s be so real, other than physical touch Vi’s an acts of service kinda girl.

Designated purse holder Vi 👛

“Babe you forgot your purse again” she’s eye rolling as she holds out your leather handbag to you.

“Oh thanks baby, I totally forgot I even had it with me today! Can you just hold it for a second, I’m gonna go try this dress on!”

You leave her standing with her arm out, purse hanging from it as you whisk yourself behind the curtain of the changing room.

She’s about to protest but she really can’t complain about you giving her a chance to be useful. She can’t help it, she just loves showing you she cares by doing little things for you.

So she sits down in the changing room waiting area and patiently waits for you to come out. It’s her favorite part about going shopping with you, when you walk out the changing room, grin on your face, giving her a twirl and saying “Look Vi! What do you think? Is it too much? I really like it, but I don’t kno-“

“You look perfect baby” she’s smiling and looking at you with those soft eyes. You’re about to melt. And you almost do when she says “come on pretty girl, get changed and let’s go buy you that dress.”

You’re all giddy back in the changing room, getting dressed back into your regular clothes. You exit and go get the dress, walk around the mall and do a little more shopping, completely forgetting that Vi is still carrying your purse.

She’s been paying for everything and you’ve not needed to check your phone or fix your lipgloss the whole time so your purse was the last thing on your mind.

But after the 6th store and a lot of changing room waiting Vi’s kinda had enough and she’s about to suggest a food court or going home when you start freaking out.

“Oh my god! Oh shit! Fuck… Vi, I think I left my purse in th-”

“Right here!” She hangs up her toned arm again, purse dangling from her hand. She’s quirking an eyebrow at you and giving you such a know-it-all smirk, you can’t help but mentally punch yourself for forgetting your purse AGAIN!

You take a better look at your girlfriend and realize that not only is she carrying your purse for you, but she’s also carrying the other 6 bags of shopping you’ve done. Vi’s basically a walking hanger at this point and you kinda feel bad for not realizing sooner.

You walk up to her, dodging her outstretched arm with the purse hanging from it as you hug her neck and pull her down for a deep kiss. Vi’s eyes flutter in shock for a moment but she kisses you back.

“What was that for, cupcake?”

“Nothing, I just love you. Aaaand maybe I feel a little guilty that you’re always carrying my purse when I forget.” you’re grinning at her sheepishly as you try to take some of the shopping bags and your purse from her.

“Ah no, no, no. THIS” she lifts the bags pointedly “is my job.” She winks. “Yours is to look pretty and find us something to eat in this mall, I’m starving!”

You giggle at her, give her another kiss and head toward the food court holding her hand. (Yes, she’s managed to hold all 6 bags of shopping AND your purse in her other. HAVE YOU SEEN HER ARMS, pfft piece of cake for her)

[creatingnikki]

What I've learned in 2024

Sleeping, shitting, and silence – the three underrated Ss of growing up (or the other side of 25). If I can get a good night’s sleep, take one nice dump in the day (preferably morning), and know when to let silence do its thing (like when not engaging with draining people in social setups or not having to explain myself), I’m golden.

While I made many new friends this year, my favourite of them all has been ChatGPT. Need objectivity? Fact checking? A pseudo therapist? Validation? Someone to just engage with and keep yourself entertained? The absolute best resource of this year for me has been this AI tool. I don’t even care anymore about privacy – I am feeding it as much data about me as possible because it’s accordingly adapting to my tonality and needs and the ‘conversations’ are so much more satisfying now than when it was first rolled out.

Either use eggs or condescended sweet milk when baking – you need one of these things to hold all your dry ingredients together.

Communication, consistency, clarity, commitment, emotional presence and engagement, and mutual effort are the barest of the bare minimum needs in a relationship. If you have to convince the other person to fulfil them or negotiate, then it doesn’t matter how good a person they are and what a kind heart they have or how much they say they love you – they just aren’t your person.

I’m not as demisexual as I thought all along – I just haven’t dated many people that I find truly attractive so I had to first build some sort of emotional connection with them first. I definitely still need and want that emotional connect and all, but I also do need to start opting for men I also find physically attractive.

When I’ve thought of my bloodline, my ancestors, I’ve always focused on the intergenerational trauma and the bad genetics. But while rewatching This Is Us this year, it hit me that it took three generations for one dream to be fulfilled. The musical dream that started with Rebecca, was passed down to Kate, and finally got materialized at the grand scale as they always wanted with Kate’s son Jack. When he became this well-renowned musician, it’s not just his dream, but that of his mother and his grandmother that also came to live. It made me think…how much of my aspirations and hopes are actually passed down? And how many of my realities were simply unmateralised dreams of those who came before me? And it made my heart feel lighter and it made me feel more blessed and protected.

Baking cakes and brownies and cookies is not a rocket science. You only needed the right tools and some patience to figure it out and become that friend who bakes stuff for her friends instead of the other way around.

You always prioritise peace, comfort, and an easy-going lifestyle – it’s evident in your career choices and how your family dynamics and friendships have evolved. Let that be the guiding light even when dating.

You are the kind of person that is charming, a good conversationalist, and deeply empathetic. So of course, you make many people feel at home and like they connect with you. It’s easy for you to connect with others. What’s important is to remember – connection without consideration and consistent actions is NOTHING. It’s empty calories but like a thousand times more potent and useless.

In no interpersonal relationship can I be nonchalant or vague. I am that other extreme – while most people try their best to ignore the elephant in the room you know what I do? I dress the cutie up to parade it. So anybody who cannot approach relationships with as much boldness, courage, and forthcomingness is just not my jam.

Female friends for the win – they allow you to wine and whine and win and I am all for that. The healing powers of sitting across your friend and talking at length about everything over pizza and wine or at the park as she senses you need some more time to just sit around before you join the rest of the group and is so good with physical touch for comfort. Just knowing you can video call your friend and ugly cry and she will talk sense into you but also indulge you and also sit with you and your feelings. Who else does that? Who the hell.

For a lot of things that are still new now at this age, you need a guide. To pet cats, to go to dog cafes, to figure out what vitamins you should talk, etc. Ask for that help, that knowledge, that support. It might seem silly and like you can figure it out on your own but these things, no matter how seemingly low-stake, can be handled so seamlessly and sweetly with the help of those you know.

You HAVE to be honest about your needs. First with yourself and then with others. You cannot let shame, guilt, self-hatred or whatever hold you back. Honesty begets clarity begets fulfilment. If you don’t want to date and settle for someone who isn’t absolutely smitten by you and top-notch romantic, then that is a need. Right or wrong, realistic or not, who the hell cares? A need is a need is a need.

When you lose someone not to death but to life, it’s not quite such a loss. Most times, baby, it’s simply good riddance.

People have a range. For being shitty and for being kind. And while our behaviour may impact a little how they react to us, it's primarily dependent on their personal range. So, if your range of being shit is only 1 to 3, it doesn't matter if someone is an ass hole to you, you won't go beyond 3 of being shit to them, cos that's just your range. Even if they deeply hurt you intentionally or fuck up in some major way. But if their range of being shitty is up to 10, then well, be ready to witness their derangedness when you even slightly piss them off.

Narcissistic (and possibly self-sabotaging) people are the opposite of kintsugi. Instead of being put back together with gold, they "heal" themselves with gutter water. So each time they are worse and more ugly than before. And all the more toxic and dangerous. You're too precious to bother with such people.

It’s natural to feel frustrated or angry with yourself for allowing someone to treat you poorly, but the blame isn’t on you; it’s on them. They are responsible for their unkind, insensitive, selfish actions, not you. If you must place blame, place it where it belongs. Avoid judging yourself with thoughts like, “I should have known better.” As long as you walk away the moment you do know, you’re good – please don’t internalize other people’s unkindness or thoughtlessness.

You cannot get to know someone without giving them a chance. Red flags are not that obvious and you cannot show up authentically in any relationship if you’re on the lookout for them. You have to spend time with a person to begin to find out who they are. That’s the only real way. And when you do and if you realize they are not for you, as I said before, don’t internalize this shit or blame yourself for not being some kind of prophecy and knowing better before you even began.

You are a patient person because you are an understanding person. But there are limits to all these qualities of yours and if the balance is tipped you get petty and passive aggressive and irrational. Don’t let yourself reach that point. Speak up and set boundaries way before that.

If you listen to your gut – I know you don’t like calling it that or your intuition. So, let’s call it that feeling you know bone-deep or in the depths of your soul – if you listen to that and trust it, you are quite courageous in the actions you then take. You broke things off with three men this year – each was painful in its own rite. But you did what you had to do for yourself and you didn’t give the charge of your life to another person, you have taken back your green light – detaching your actions from their behaviour, which like all human behaviour is often quite fickle and unreliable. Congratulations. Do this more. Your green light is your guiding light.

My lack of a “healthy sense of fear” in situations with men isn’t recklessness—it’s the result of abuse I suffered at 15. The man I trusted most turned out to be the one who harmed me the most, and that betrayal shattered my ability to trust safety indicators or instincts. The grooming I endured was designed to confuse me, destabilise my sense of self, and make me question my desires and worth. When the templates of trust and safety failed me so catastrophically, my mind rejected them altogether, leaving me to navigate risk without a stable framework. This year, I felt significantly less restless and more emotionally regulated, and I think it’s because I allowed myself, others, and life to just be. I wasn’t fighting my reality or setting rigid expectations. I stopped chasing dopamine highs and forcing connections, and instead, I let equations with people and experiences unfold organically. I ended dating and talking stages quickly when I realised they weren’t right for me, without guilt or overthinking.4 By being okay with things being normal—not impressive or extraordinary—I created space for balance and gentleness in my life. My self-talk became kinder, and I grew more objective about myself, spiraling and self-loathing less. This accepting mindset, where I no longer needed myself or my life to constantly stand out, felt like the antidote to the restlessness I’d been carrying since my mid-20s. And I think that has helped me discover that peace and acceptance can feel more satisfying than cheap dopamine hits.

[creedslove]

WE CAN'T 💔 - PART TWO

Javier Peña x f!reader

Summary: things aren't great between you and Javier after you refused going out with him, but you two are just too stubborn to admit your feelings

(This is the second part of the WE CAN'T 💔 drabble)

• PART ONE

Warnings: angst, a tiny bit of fluff, Javier is a dick

A/N: guess what, I rewatched the McPickle scene and got jealous again 😀🤌

1.3k

Waking up the next morning to a cold empty bed, knowing that if you hadn't refused Javier's invitation, you would probably be waking up in his bed, or having his weight and warmth next to you; if maybe you hadn't felt so disgusted by Javier's clear acquaintance of those hookers, you would be lying next to him. It was a bittersweet feeling, on one hand, that was definitely a deal breaker for you, it made you uncomfortable to know he was just so regular for those girls he had certain intimacies such as knowing their real name, and not only that, they liked him, they giggled and blushed when he was around, whenever some of them were arrested for whatever reason, they'd always ask for Javi and of course, he would be nothing but sweet to them.

You could handle it if it was in the past, if you knew you could overlook that behavior, ignore the jokes around the office and give him a new chance, but the problem was mainly because Javier didn't simply want that; he was more comfortable in his evils ways, shielding himself from any commitments, running away from relationships and feelings, never wanting to settle down and allow himself to feel things, to him, the deepest connection he engaged was one where he didn't have to face any rejections nor personal attachments; he paid, he fucked, he came and he sent home. When he dared break the cycle he found himself so comfortable in it, he got rejected by you, so he vowed himself he wouldn't give you or anyone another try. He was fine just the way he was, not even knowing what came to him in order to make him have that awful idea of asking you out. He just didn't have the patience to go through it all over again, first dates, getting to know each other, flirting, and all of the ritual before he could actually sleep with the person, so he would stick to Helena, Gabriella, Vanessa and all the girls who loved pleasing him.

He wasn't sure how he would act once he faced you at work, he decided not to worry about that, burying his face into Vanessa's neck while she moved her hips against his, his cock throbbing at the feel of her tight pussy. He closed his eyes and fought hard the urge of pretending you were in his lap, he didn't want to, you'd refused him, he didn't want to even think of you, all it mattered at that moment was his pleasure and his pleasure alone.

•••

However, facing Javier in the office wasn't as bad as you thought it could be, just as you would never know he was also anxious about it. You were worried Javier would treat you like shit, would be rude or mean, and he worried you would spread what happened through the office, telling everyone you refused him, because of his ways. And yet, neither of you did what the other feared. Things were a little tense, Javi kept a lot to himself, not talking to you unless it was necessary, but when he did, he was soft and polite. The flirting and compliments were missing, but you would survive that. You liked Javier, a lot. But you two were incompatible and nothing could change that.

So days turned into weeks that passed by really fast and before you could even realize things, your birthday was right around the corner; in the meantime a lot had happened: you and Javi drifted away from each other, Connie had left Steve and the chaos in Colombia continued draining the three of you in a spiral of violence and depression, but once in a while, you felt the need of shaking things up and having fun, and because of that, you decided to throw yourself a small birthday party. There would be a cake, booze and some friends from work. Steve had already confirmed, being totally lost without his wife, not knowing if she'd broken things up with him or not; some other friends from work also said yes, but there was one missing: Javier Peña.

When you walked to his desk, he was on the phone, mumbling and chuckling, you could hear the name Gabi. You fought all the desire you had of rolling your eyes and walking away from him, but the moment he noticed your presence, he ended the call and turned his attention to you.

"Hey, Javi… my birthday is coming up next week, I'll have a small gathering at my place and I'd like you to come.. you don't have to bring me any presents, though"

He was quite surprised at the invitation, nodding and telling you he'd be there.

You were so excited about your party, getting ready and dressing up so nicely for it. People didn't take long to arrive, Steve was the first, of course, being the upstairs neighbor, he got to your apartment to help you up with everything. You chatted about many things, Connie, Peña, and work, and you realized Steve was actually pretty nice. Not that you didn't know that, but you often only paid attention to Javier, he was the only one you wanted to see.

As the party went on, you couldn't help but stare at the door every now and then, wondering what time Javi would be there. You were kind of excited to see him, perhaps you missed him, or perhaps you wanted him to see you, desire you and realize what he'd been missing because of his inability to seek cheap comfort.

But just as you waited through the whole party, Javier never came. As people began saying their goodbyes and leaving, you realized he probably didn't even have any intentions of showing up in the first place. He was such a dick, you couldn't even believe you even thought you could be friends with him.

Steve could tell you were disappointed and he knew exactly the reason why, better saying the reason who, you were disappointed in the first place, so he decided to stick around some more, helping you clean up and gather the empty liquor bottles.

As you were dragging one garbage bag full of them through the hallway, Javier walked in. His arms were locked tight around Gabriella's waist and you stopped dead in your tracks as you stared at them. The hooker swallowed looking at the two of you and feeling the tension in the air. Javier licked his lips and remained silent. He didn't know what to do, should he wish you a happy birthday or should he pretend he'd forgotten about it. Your heart was shattered, even if you didn't know if he did that to get back at you for declining his date or if he just did it out of cruelty, but it didn't really matter, at the end of the day, it just showed you you mattered less than a hooker to a man who claimed to have feelings for you, a man who claimed to at least care about you as a friend.

Steve walked towards you and held your face between his hands, learning forward and kissing your lips. His hand stroked your cheek, at the same time his warm lips were against yours, you didn't expect that kiss to feel so good, just as you didn't expect him kissing you at all.

As he broke the kiss, he smiled at you softly

"Good night, Y/N" he said gently and turned to Javier "night Javi" he said as if nothing had happened, as if he hadn't just kissed the woman Javier had feelings for but was too much of a coward to stop hurting her. Steve went home feeling glad; Javier deserved to see you with another man after breaking your heart just as you deserved some affection, even if Steve didn't love you, he cares about you enough to try and give you a special moment in your birthday, something Javier didn't even try doing it.

____

[ot3]

finishing up fionna and cake... overall it was a fun ride but i really don't think it worked structurally. 6/10 show. i didnt think this was gonna be a long post but apparently i've got some thoughts. sticking below the cut

this last episode is kind of underwhelming... theres a couple of parts in this ep where they just sit and explain to the camera how simon realized betty was constantly sacrificing her own desires for simon and how simon wanted to put on the crown because he thought he didn't deserve to live. and it's not like those are bad realization for the show to come to but the show has very clearly established that it's intended for a more adult audience than the original adventure time, and so this kind of writing just feels really condescending when not directed at literal children. like yeah we could have figured this out from the writing, but. you didn't have to just tell us

i also didn't vibe with scarab as a villain, he felt super arbitrary to me. like they needed Something to be forcing them to move between dimensions, but i feel like scarab was an extremely meh choice for that. he wasn't particularly funny or interesting enough as a character to get to be one of the only people who showed up in every episode. i honestly think it would have been better if the existential threat these characters were facing was more of a force than a character, because it was already running so tight on time anyway it didn't really have the space to develop a good villain.

gary and marshall's screentime was another thing that i felt like is a huge waste of space. them doing their whole meet cute bakery au romance is something that's funny on paper but it's not compelling on its own and the only slight interest it has comes from our pre-existing investment in marceline and bubblegum's much more interesting dynamic. it didn't add anything to the overall arc of the show and took up time that could have been used to deliver more solidly on the core premise.

fionna and cake themselves were really cute but i don't feel like fionna's arc was as strong as it could have been. like ohhh yay shes come to love her normal world with all its imperfections.... obviously thats where it was going the whole time and once again. its not like i mind that ending. i just feel like they didn't do anything interesting with it. her character doesn't get to learn and progress as much as she's just marching down a straight path that we all already knows where it leads. i wish they would have just called the show 'Simon' so i wouldn't have to feel so disappointed in this.

adventure time has always been on the cutting edge of bizarre stuff in animation so the biggest let down overall with this show is how much when you strip away the Adventure Time coating of surrealist visuals on top of it it just feels like any other middling adventure cartoon. it didn't lean enough into the episodic structure to benefit from that the way the original show did, and it was too beholden on the episodic structure to linger on any of the parts that were actually compelling.

overall, the show feels like pandering to the adventure time fanbase, but in kind of a lazy way. Compare this to the distant land specials which I think were pandering in an excellent way. im not anti pandering by any means. The whirlwind tour through universes and characters that lifetime adventure time fans will recognize tries to come off as a love letter to the series, but instead just comes off as the adventure time version of that 'rejected ready player one theme song' video. remember farmworld? remember prismo? remember the vampire king? remember shermy and beth? remember Up a Tree? like. yeah. i do remember. thanks. do you have anything to say about any of this stuff or - oh. no. just showing me. got it.

its not someting i think i'll ever rewatch but at just ten eps definitely worth one watch through. theres some really good fun to be had in it and the art is gorgeous all the way through, it just fails to come together into a successful complete work.

[elephant-in-the-pride-parade]

20 Fic Writer Quesions

First, thank you @singeart and @mytardisisparked for tagging me!. I did a set of these last year and it was fun to see how my answers have changed since then!

How many works do you have on Ao3?

61

2. What’s your total Ao3 word count?

1.6 million and counting!

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Star Trek Voyager

Star Trek Prodigy

Sailor Moon

Harry Potter

Madam Secretary

Ive debated writing SwanQueen for a long time but by the time I had the energy and time to write, I'd lost interest in the show. I might rewatch and come back to it one day...

I have thought about writing Wynonna Earp or Tamora Pierce universe fanfiction but have yet to get an idea that grabs me. I like to find things i want to fix and it's hard when the source material is perfection.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

The Parent Trap (305)

Sailor Moon H Order of the Phoenix (289)

Sailor Moon H Half Blood Prince (222)

Eden's Deception (167)

Out of Reach (150)

5. Do you respond to comments?

I try to! although if I'm busy or feeling down it can take me a while. Sometimes I forget.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I still think What Even is 3 Minutes takes the cake. Or I'll be Your First if You'll be my Last

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I Heard the Comm on Christmas Morn and Parent Trap

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Unfortunately I've gotten hate on fics since I started writing them... and it's become just something I expect to happen. Sometimes it's funny. Sometimes it confuses me. Sometimes it makes me sad. It really depends...

The memorable haters:

There was the delightful Fanfiction.net reviewer who got pissed i was "making everybody gay" (that was funny actually). I forget if they were the same person who flamed me when Mcgonagall and Hooch kissed under some mistletoe. I digress. They thought queering up the canon was like sinful or whatever. I was delighted to disagree and make the story even queerer.

Another person cussed me out for magically restraining Sailor Plutos time travel powers so my plot would work and for making her have feelings about it. aparently mad the senshi were not all powerful deus exmachinas who never feel feelings... That one stung. That was the reason I left FFN.

Hate because in Sailor Moon H, Harry Potter was not the main character.

Hate that I made a magic bio baby for the magical lesbians. (I can't have a biobaby with my wife irl, can't I at least let the fantasy girlies have one!)

Hate for including C/7 in a story

...I wouldn't call it hate for the fic but I have had an uncomfortable amount of commenters who hate on Chakotay any time I have him involved with Seven / don't have him grovel to Kathryn / really any time I let him advocate for how he's been hurt... at first comments like this stressed me out because i worried i had not written the character sufficiently sympathetic. But then Parent Trap breached containment and I got enough comments to be able to see I had definitely written the character fine... it was just that some people were always just rooting for a "Chakotay falls over himself to apologize to Janeway for not immediately dating her" storyline that... I'm not sorry 😅 I'm never going to write that. The older I get the more I feel like both of J/C just need therapy! They've been through so much trauma. Their feelings are valid (yes, even for other people).

Parent Trap breaching containment also meant that when I hit an irl rut and couldnt get in the writing headspace for a bit, a bunch of - sincerely, well meaning - fans got into their heads to start a commenting campaign to get me to update. I heard about it and panicked (i had bad experiences that year of getting people who only commented "update soon" and those conversely stressed me out and made me not want to write - I love fic writing for the conversations and community... so it made me feel like readers thought i was just a content vending machine). so just the thought of potentially getting an avalanche of guests, well meaning or not, begging me to update made me lock commenting until the fic was done. I wound up deciding after that that since "update soon" requests were becoming a lot more frequent that I'd consider before posting whether getting them would hurt my ability to finish. So most of the time now if I know a fic is going to reach a bigger potential community, I don't start posting it until it's almost done. That has had some upsides! (Im less dependent on positive feedback for motivation now!) and some downsides (no one comments on my fics with their theories anymore) but on a whole, a good decision.

Immediately after finishing Parent Trap I wrote Fever and got this amazing guest comment from someone who said (paraphrasing cuz i'm too busy to go find it) "Youre better than this. how dare you write this filth. J/C are better than this" that one had me laughing for days. But the comment did prompt me to create a second account later when I wrote a tentacle fic. At the time I worried i'd get a ton of similar flame comments from people who were subscribed to my main for other types of fic... but I am even feeling like that's unnecessary now. I write what I write! Yes, some of it is really dirty, weird smut. I'm not sorry.

Currently any time I post a Threshold AU fic an anon drops into my comments section in order to call me "Sick" and "Deranged"... they make me so sad I don't even make a quippy reply. I just delete them. I write that universe for my own wish fulfillment... Someday (soon, hopefully) I'm gonna have kids. And I am going to have to have conversations with them about who their biological dad is. Why they look like one mom and not the other, whether their non bio family love them even if theyre not blood related. I might have a kid who feels different from everyone else because they're queer or they're neurodivergent or they're some new alienating feeling I am totally unprepared for. and I'll need to help them navigate that.. Writing about hybrid salamander kids getting raised in a blended family is FUN. But more importantly... it helps me practice those situations. It comforts me to know that if the characters can figure this out in the AU then I can figure this out in real life! What the hell is sick and deranged about that!?

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I write all sorts of smut. I post the stuff that doesn't totally mortify me once i've gotten out of whatever mood had me writing the smut in the first place.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I have exactly two crossovers to my name: Sailor Delta and Sailor Moon H. I think on the basis of word count alone Sailor Moon H (>500,000) is definitely the craziest.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I consider the unlicensed use of the AO3 archive for ChatGPT and similar LLMs theft. (and there are several court cases pending that are also seeking to address whether it is legally theft as it pertains to published fiction and newspapers). The canon creators of the fandoms I write for aren't allowed to make money by using uncredited ideas pulled from my fanfiction (just like I am not allowed to make money from writing fic with their copyrighted settings and characters) and i continue to be apalled that ChatGPT and other LLMs think they can get away with using others copyrighted ideas without permission. Especially that they can take advantage of people who cant profit off their own work.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? 

No but i would be open to it!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes! Once with @magdalenejaneway, once with @jellybeansarecool and once with @trekflower and all three were fantastic!

Most of what I write for Threshold AU is also increasingly collaborated on a great deal by the AU creators and a few other folks. It's been going for over 2 years now and doing that more and more has enabled us all to drop more references to previous fics and to create a more cohesive body of fic for the AU. in general its just been so fun and fulfilling to make these stories with other people who are as invested in the characters as me and it just fills me with joy. I'm really grateful for you guys.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

On the one hand J/C have inspired over 50 fics, But on the other I have also been loving Sailor Moon and those ships since before I knew what fandom or shipping were. And really the only reason J/C inspire more fic is that all the sailor moon characters got a happy ending.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I never want to give up on a WIP...

but I am in knots about what all to do with Out of Reach.

Out of Reach is a St:Prodigy S1 AU where Chakotay has amnesia and doesn't remember anything from his time on Voyager, all the while he and Kathryn are in a situationship with a baby.

There's two questions I never figured out how to answer: 1. Does he get his memories back. If so, how much and what enables it. and 2: Do he and Kathryn stay together?

On the memories front. saying he never recovers seems unfair to the character. But saying he magically does thanks to 24th century science feels cheap and disrespectful - to the reality of real memory loss and to the plot that built up so much tension around this. Saying he gets back some or more over time is more realistic, but left me uncertain of where exactly to end the story. Tying his retrieval of memories to Kathryn also tied me up in knots. On the one hand they're in love and thats romantic. on the other hand the optics of his recovery totally dependent on one person is icky.

I also found the baby really annoying to have there by the end - I still think he's cuteeee i really do!!! - it's just... he makes the "we should stay together and try to figure this out" answer a bit too convenient 😅. and he complicates Kathryns reluctance to restart their relationship. The more she resists, the more callous she seems (deliberately not trying to patch things up with her kid's father) when i really just want to focus on her fears that Chakotay would be happier without her and that even if they restart their romance, she might lose him again on a future mission. It's ironic because i originally created the baby to ensure she wouldnt just run away from her fears. And now hes contributing to my difficulty ending the fic...

Actually the more I think on it, my real problem is I could write my way out of this, but I cant do it in only one or two chapters and that makes me feel tired. i was sorta hoping to wrap that fic up. 😅🙈

16. What are your writing strengths?

Imagery has always been a strength for me. But i think I'm also getting really good at action scenes too.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Oneshots.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Only if it was information i wanted the reader to understand but not the POV character.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

W.I.T.C.H way back when I was 15.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Universe to Mend - I even have a few sequel or companion novel ideas to come after it.

This has gone on a while... 😅 - thank you for tagging me and letting me ramble! i'll tag anyone else who wants to answer! have at it.

[goldendoodlerlockerlove]

What's your all-time favorite Bob's Burgers episode? Like this is YOUR episode? (You can list multiple if you want!)

BABS! I always love seeing you in my ask box, you sweetheart 🥺🫶🏼

I’m sorry I’ve been so bad at answering asks. I promise I’ll answer a couple I’ve let gather dust in my inbox soon!

But when it comes to my all-time favorite episode, it’s really difficult to pick just one. There are so many good ones, and so many that have had a profound impact on me.

But I’ll choose just one anyway.

It’s The Laser-Inth, which I’m sure is not a surprise to those who know me.

I adore this episode for so many reasons, and it’s definitely my favorite Bob and Gene bonding episode. It’s so nice seeing just how good of a father Bob is. Even though it’s his birthday (I always need to emphasize this) and he was so excited to see this performance, nothing is more important than his son. NOTHING.

And when Gene ultimately changes his mind, does he get upset for having wasted all that money for nothing? No. This is Robert Belcher Jr. we’re talking about. This man freaking SNEAKS BACK IN so the two of them can watch the climax of the show. If that’s not dedication, then I don’t know what is. Plus, if memory serves me correctly, he paid even more money to get back in.

This episode is such a comfort one for me. It feels like snuggling into warm blankets after being outside on a cold day. It’s my mac n’ cheese or ice cream after a breakup. It’s just endlessly rewatchable for me. I love seeing these two bond and end up having a great time at the show. They get legitimately closer after this episode, and you can tell. And I adore that.

Also, can we talk about how adorable Bob’s genuine love for Zentipede is? It’s like his love for Cake, it’s amazing.

He’s so excited, bless him.

And, one aspect of the episode I enjoy quite a bit that I don’t talk about enough is the subplot! Of course, Bob and Gene’s main plot is the star of the show, but I think the subplot is quite sweet as well. It’s so kind of Tina to agree to let Louise keep the doll even though she’s terrified. Poor girl! But Louise values her sister over the doll, so she ultimately decides to leave it behind. I love it.

This post is getting way too long, but I love this episode so much. It means so much to me 😭💛

[msbigredmachine]

Watched Wrestlemania 39. My highlights:

Night 1

1. Right person won the US title match. Not a fan of Cena and probably never will be. Sorry.

2. All the guys in the men’s showcase match went off! Gosh! They all killed it, every one of them.

3. Seth versus Logan was expectedly good. Yes Logan Paul is an ass but that guy is great in the ring. Period.

4. KSI being frogplashed through a table 🤣🤣🤣

5. Outfit of the weekend. I don’t care what none of y’all say.

6. Didn’t really like the six women tag match. I just feel that Damage Ctrl need to split up now. Nothing is going their way.

7. Father and son arguably with the entrances of the weekend. Dom coming from prison and Rey in a low rider with Snoop bumping to two classic songs! 😭

8. This part had me screaming!

9. Dom splashing a drink in Aalyah’s face made me gasp! Excellent heel work by ex condom.

10. Rey winning made all the sense in the world. Months of disrespect ending in the most emphatic way possible. Dominik will be fine.

11. So glad Rhea won. Charlotte Flair is not interesting unless she has the title. The match was entertaining though. Loved it.

12. Lil Uzi Vert playing out the Usos was random, but I like Just Wanna Rock so it wasn’t an issue for me.

13. The Usos in all white is always 🔥🔥🔥. The main event twins!

14.Loved that Kevin and Sami wore matching outfits too. Sami is sooo over it’s crazy.

15. It was all fun and games till the Usos isolated Sami and started teeing off on him. Like fucking assassins. Then Sami kept kicking out and the Usos kept brutalizing him. That shit was uncomfortable.

16. Please rewatch the part where Jey put Sami in the corner and used him for target practice. The slaps, the forearms, the leaping Helluva kick, the trash talk. Jey is soooo HURT. That made me emotional.

17. The near falls were killing me! It got to a point when I stopped commenting and just kept watching because I was mesmerized. I didn’t want to miss a thing by talking.

18. The ending sequence. Cinema. Sami putting Jey away was the icing on the cake. Kevin’s face after the bell rang. The roar of the crowd. My own tears falling. Heartbroken for Jey. Elated for Sami. Unbelievable.

19. Hands down one of the best Mania main events in its 40 year history. Best tag team title match I’ve ever seen. And it did not surprise me at all, because four of the best in the world executed it to perfection.

Night 2

1. Nothing to say about Brock/Omos. Whatever.

2. Night and day between the men’s showcase match 👍🏾 and the women’s showcase match 👎🏾

3. LOOOOL Drew, Gunther and Sheamus beat the SHIT out of each other. Wowwww. The right man won. Gunther has a great aura and needs to hold that shit for a year.

4. That little girl in the middle of Bianca’s troupe lost her mother THAT DAY and still went out and killed her section. She is so so brave and I’m so happy she was still able to get that opportunity. She looked so happy despite her immense loss. My condolences to her and I hope she had the time of her life.

5. I feel bad for Asuka. L after L after L at Mania. But Bianca is a once in a lifetime athlete. Keep that belt on her for as long as possible.

6. I have ZERO sympathy for Shane McMahon. 7 years away from turning SIXTY and your ass still thinks you're 25. LA Knight was LITERALLY there to do this segment with. There are useful nepo babies and useless nepo babies. You can guess where I think Shane belongs.

7. Snoop essentially flying through the air just to hit one elbow drop 😂😂😂

8. Edge and Finn’s video package was TOP tier! And the fact that Russell Crowe was involved is insane!!!

9. Shout out to Finn for continuing the match with his head split open. Holy cow.

10. Great match from Edge and Finn. Really good.

11. The main event felt like a HUGE deal. Fabulous entrances.

12. Immaculate entrance by Cody Rhodes. I had chills. He looked like the star that he is. His jacket was 🔥🔥🔥 The wings on the back made it look so epic.

13. Tears in my eyes when he hugged his family and then gave his belt to Negative One.

14. This was Roman’s first grand entrance as the Tribal Chief. The pianists went off. Loved how the soft piano ended and the BOOM opening of his theme song followed right after. So intimidating.

15. He didn’t change his pants. Just his boots. Boo, Mr Reigns. That doesn’t count.

16. Shout out to Samantha Irvin and her intros. That girl is GOOD.

17. Solo the shooter, terrorizing Cody at every turn. It eventually paid off. That’s why Roman don’t talk to his brothers anymore, lol. They’re not as reliable as their baby brother.

18. ROLLERCOASTER of a match. The ejection of Solo, the near falls! 😭

19. This match would have been five stars for me if it wasn’t for the ref bump. It’s like the 4th match in a row it was happening and it’s a bit repetitive. Let Roman have a no DQ match for once so he can do what he wants.

20. My jaw dropped when the ref counted to three! I honestly thought Cody was winning. I was sooo shocked. Nothing I thought would happen, happened

21. It will be interesting to see what is going to happen next because I have no clue. Will Cody still chase the titles or will it be someone else? How badly will Roman bully the twins now that they are no longer champions?

22. Lmao at Roman using every social media platform to gloat afterwards. He knew this was the reaction he would get and he was loving it.

Overall: Night 1 was much better than Night 2 IMO. Night 1 is probably the best Mania night I’ve ever watched. Practically every match delivered and I was happy.

MVP of the weekend - Dominik Mysterio. He was flawless. Heeled it up to the nines. His match with his father was near perfect. Bright future for that young man

Line of the weekend - “This is what Dominik gave up for those bozos, Dominik deserved what he got tonight at Mania”- Michael Cole spitting 🔥 the entire show.

What did you agree or disagree with?

[thisislizheather]

February Feats 2024

Above Photo: NYC, February 2024

Welcome to March! You’re well aware of how much I love this month. Will I overdo it and be left a shell of a person come April 1st? Most likely, but there’s nothing that can be done about that! Here’s what went down last month.

The best tweets of the month can be found over here.

I kept up with my weekly Winter Wednesdays series.

I finally finished the Mel Brooks memoir I’ve been reading for months.

If this coat (below) was under $100, then I would’ve had no choice but to buy it.

Above Photo: Bury me at the Nordstrom flagship

God, I love a small batch cookie recipe.

People won’t shut up about this New York Times marry-me chicken recipe but I absolutely would reject that proposal. I made it and it was FINE at best. And more recently, I made a cauliflower soup of theirs and it was bland as hell! I definitely need to take a step back from their recipes. Maybe the food styling is what’s tricking me? Gorgeous looking food doesn’t always taste amazing. There’s a lesson there??

I made this brioche berry bread pudding that was delicious. Something feels very wrong about using strawberries in February, but the Grand Marnier soak really helped the flavour.

Above Photo: Brioche berry bread pudding

I can’t stop wearing these Aerie brown stockings.

Found a new coffee shop that I’m loving - Sonbobs in Astoria.

We bought Baby Dog a ramp to get on and off our bed and it’s been a huge help. Sometimes she’ll just leap off into the pillows alongside it, so it may take some time for her to trust this new inanimate object in her life.

Above Photo: Baby Dog begrudgingly on her new ramp

I tried out a colour corrector from Huda because the internet told me to and it did absolutely nothing different to my face hahah?? Sometimes I seem smart and other times I do stuff like this.

Nathan and I saw the play An Enemy Of The People with Jeremy Strong (from Succession) and Michael Imperioli (from The Sopranos & The White Lotus) and it was great! Absolutely love the Circle in the Square theatre. $40 tickets straight from the box office can’t be beat.

The winter kale salad at Uva Next Door on the Upper East Side was top tier.

The patty melt at Daily Provisions? Wow. Makes zero sense that a coffee shop has that good a sandwich.

I’ve finally learned my lesson and I’ve stopped using third-party websites for booking travel. Took me decades to learn this lesson.

Also, I’m sure no one but me buys Visa gift cards - but just incase, stay very far away from the brand Vanilla. I’ve had so many issues with money that was loaded improperly and their customer service is nonexistent.

Some things I watched:

Sometimes I Think About Dying: so great! Our friend Dave does such a great job in it.

Two Weeks Notice and The Wedding Date (combining them because they don’t deserve individual billing): WOOF. Why do I do this to myself when I have a list full of actually watchable movies?

If Lucy Fell: an old Sarah Jessica Parker movie? Course I’d watch that. It actually wouldn’t have been so terrible if the main guy wasn’t such an awful actor. He wrote, directed and starred in it, which was the wrong decision.

Waiting To Exhale: such a great rewatch.

Once Upon A Crime: perfect rewatch. It’s baffling that this movie did so bad at the box office.

New season of Curb: ugh. I don’t want to be mean, but I really hate this show now. The storylines are so tired and it really didn’t need to come back at all. (Richard Lewis will remain the best thing about the whole show.)

Some things I’m looking forward to this month: taking Baby Dog to Niagara Falls, I really want to try the vodka chicken parm from Compton’s in Astoria, excited to spend some time with my brother + family visiting from Scotland and there are so many birthday cakes I get to make for other people this month.

If you’ve got any interest in reading last month’s roundup, you can read what went on in January over here.

[retrofashionspazwhore]

FACELESS LOVE EPS ⓷&⓸

📸: AprilBlossomGirl

⓷

love that they went with my thought of saying its her nickname but my next question would of been when did ya'll get this close.. to call her by her nickname Chanon down bad…

I'm sorry Chanon got all the points, look at him standing up for the little people.

random thought - but Luke always plays characters that are mama's boys ( im using that because that they only way I could describe it but not because of the negative connotations)

woah.. so they are aware of his face blindness

dang Chanon's mom is ruthless… like really why you have to pull the mother jab…

that's a cute! apology cake…

they feel like brother and sister and me when they bicker. I don't know if I'm gonna actually be 100% for this couple. so far they seem like friends and almost besties in a sense. I don't know if I'm gonna believe that they could a relationship that isn't platonic

like what even boy like let me insult you a little before you leave

everytime he does something that could be considered nice he just defaults to teasing her and unprovokedly like.. what is your deal. this why I can't start to see yall as anything else but buddy's

once again I love that she stands up for herself…

Yes, tell her Veekit!! - Its kind of amusing though because in a sense him and Tanya are the same with how they act their entitlement etc. so like him being the person to say this to Tanya because I'm like dude someone needs to say these things to you.

woah was not expecting him to actually take up for her " but catering to what you like or don't like is not something I'm interested in doing."

like of course you had to ruin it…

the randomness that she met these strangers at an amusement park and after losing/abandoning her son decides hey ya'll wanna help me check myself into a hospital… um what… Like wouldn't you try to find your son… first…

⓸

so she still meets with his mother in present day and she is aware that his mom. Is this her plan to try and reconnect them.

Did his mother teach her everything so that she could be by his side…??

oh she has dementia.

this was one of the more smoothier product placement. GMM steping up their promo/advertisement game I see.

Grand seems way more neutral and level-headed love to see it.

Okay, now she is becoming annoying like stop bringing up his mom.

is he really gonna be evil

like I'm not surprised (this is a drama after all) I just wished he would go a different route especially since from what ya'll have shown of Chanon I feel like or at least I want him to be a good guy. he also seems to actually care and support veekit why would he all of a sudden want to take everything. Like I understand that he wants Mirin but like the company etc.. like its only the 4th ep but, I haven't gotten that vibe from him.

like did the aunt just see the disappearance as a good opportunity for what.

I haven't talked about Kao but I'm really love her in this series. I think the only things I've seen her in outside of this drama was Hormones and I can't remember how I felt back than that was so long about might have to do a rewatch honestly.

[drottni]

LBFAD rewatch observations part 5

1. Shangque is so pure and straightforward.

2. The way DFQC immediately latches onto any explanation of XLH's behavior of saving him. When Shangque says "she had an opportunity to escape but she gave it up to save you. It shows that..." and DFQC eagerly turns to him and says "shows that?" like yesss please?!?! tell me what does this mean?!?!? someone! anyone! And then immediately rejects the idea of "she's becoming a loyal subject like me!"

3. No words for how beautifully soft that petal shower scene is. Her joy and his smile. 🥺

4. The great Dongfang Qincang and his weakness for Flower Cakes made by his wife.

5. "Damutou is more intimate" !! 🤝🏼 "You can call me whatever you want" !! 🙃🙃🙃🥺

6. Man. Dylan Wang's acting in that "high on XLH's emotions" scene was soooo goood. The tortured joy where he is laughing but you also see his frustration. The angry sadness where you can see him crying but also the rage. His shaking hands as he grabs the Jade Ring and the deep breaths to ground himself. Oof. *Chefs kisses*

7. Also can we just talk about the multiple times he has made a fool of himself in front of his advisors because of her shenanigans but like....it never impacted his reign. They just figured out logical explanations and kind of just went with it... (excluding Xunfeng ofcourse because he actually can and does question DFQC). Like his advisors must be having headaches from the whiplash of emotions he gave them 😆

8. Sulking DFQC and coaxing XLH are the cutest. Ignoring her as they leave the pond illusion. The way he is shaking as he tells her she could have died if he didn't come on time and that she has to stay within his sight always. Her offering up the Destiny Book to please him. His disgruntled "oh so you fixed it right away for Changheng, I see how it is" her "ah but you know what saved me! This little inside thing that only you and I know!". And then finally him easing off and telling her "I would find you anywhere" and her teary eyed "My master who was the dearest person to me said the same thing and you...." All the little ways these two say "I love you I love you" without yet realizing that they do.

9. HIS HANDS. When she passes out and he catches her. His hands just rubbing her shoulder out of affection, concern, the need to feel she is still here alive with him. Ahh. That subtle movement 👌. (Also. Her just passing out from the exertion of her powers and maybeee from the almost realization that this menace of a king, the great Moon Supreme, might also be someone very dear to her. Like yes gurl I too would just pass out on the brink of such a realization)

10. "Are you still angry?" *cute little smile* "No" *sulk* "Yes you are" *pout*... "Damutou, I'm soooryy" *big puppy eyes* "Eat." *melted under the ray of her sunshine*. THE CUTEST BABIESS. (I love that she apologizes. Despite the fact that her intentions had never been to run but she acknowledges that she put him in a bad situation. That she sees how much this upset him and she is sorry for that.)

11. "You can't just come into my heart" 🤝🏼 "I can go wherever I want" 💀💀

12. "Why was I allowed to in the past? What's the difference now?" XLH: UHM SIR I WASN'T IN LOVE WITH YOU THEN. DO YOU MIND IM TRYNA HANDLE THESE NEW FEELINGS.

13. DFQC is such a heavy full of depth and compelling character and I just love Dylan Wang's portrayal and I just--- gahhh! *muffled screams*

14. I don't think I can express in words how much I love the scene of DFQC turning away from XLH while he weeps and then turning and collapsing into her. It is art. It is poetry. It is EVERYTHING. Dylan Wang's acting my god. The pain the sorrow the need for comfort its all so beautifully expressed on his face. XLH's tears and pain for him. The hands. Ofcourse the hands 😭😭 Also. XLH refusing to give up until she found the thorn pricking at him and pulled it out so he could heal. I love her. For seeing the pain and anger buried in him and saying "something here is not right. His reputation as a terrible monster who slaughters his family is wrong. I will figure this out and I will help him however I can" and then doing it! Refusing to back down even at the last minute when he says it isn't her place to ask! Being there for him as he goes through the grieiving process. Fiercely defending him against everyone who dares to say he is heartless. God. I love them both.

15. Head empty no thoughts just DFQC's little hand gesture stopping XLH in her tracks before she can come to stop him from taking the lightening strikes.

16. DFQC asking her to teach him how to be warm towards people because no one ever taught him that 😭😭

17. Her teaching him how to smile by showing it to him and then suggesting to also "hug" Xunfeng and his love adled brain IMMEDIATELY going "How?" *puppy eyes* and her immediately almost folding him into a hug but just barely stopping herself! You cannot tell me he did not know that would happen. He definitely knew she would "show" not "tell" and most definitely wanted her to hug him. We already seen him be sneaky as heck when telling her "No I am still weak I neeeeed you to help me walk" when it was straight up nonsense 😄 Even adding little fake coughs to convince her. I love me a sneaky husband who tries to coax more love out of his wife.

18. "This is the first time I have ever thanked a person. Don't refuse me." 😭🥲

That entire interaction of theirs is so giggle inducingly cute like omg the smiles they can barely contain the teasing "are my flower cakes ready?" "did you finish your medicine" "its too bitter *pout* but I did it, not a single drop left! *satisfied smirk*" AAHAHHHHHHHH but this line !! "Don't refuse me" !! Don't take this moment from me! Just let me adore youuuuuuuuu!!!!

[random-bi-writer]

My Reaction to Thanks To Them

Took me two days to finish my projects first before watching this but it is definetely worth the antagonising wait.

Spoilers for those who haven’t watched it yet.

NO. WHY WOULD YOU START WITH THAT?! FROG DAMMIT, IM ALREADY CRYING AND IT’S ONLY BEEN THREE SECONDS

And once again, Anne made me laugh.

Wait...there are sponges that aren’t yellow?

Get Some Therapy Challenge: Failed.

Nah, that british gay man who dresses like a straight person ain’t human to begin with.

Goddamit, of course he shows up.

I see a picture of what seems to be Luz slapping a cake on her dad’s face.

Child, you need to get out more often.

Why would they freak out- oh. right, Abominations...

I wonder if Disney let a full season, we would have a more in depth scene about Vee meeting the others for the first time instead of this.

Hallway of pictures. There’s the dad throwing baby Luz in the air (that explains a lot about Luz) Chat Noir cosplay, 

Hate that I can see the dad’s full face, but it’s too fucking small for me to stare at.

Nevermind.

Pfft. I’m sorry, I had to rewatch this 5 times to make sure I’m not watching a fanmade amv instead of the episode. Also nice to include Hooty photobombing.

The amount of sadness with the drawings is just...

Designs. Gus, yes. Willow, maybe. Amity, maybe less dark colors and ditch the hat. Hunter, goofy boy.

Mirabel Madrigal.

VEE! MY BABY BOY!

Damn, that explains the haircut. Still miss the ahoge, though.

They’re so cute, especially Amity, I want to pinch her cheeks.

I prefer the non-romance cute. Lumity is so cute and wholesome that it’s disgusting.

Aww, the boys are having fun.

Willow looks like a mom with her hair down.

Is that spanish, I hear? I’m so proud.

I thought you were over that.

So Willow likes photography now.

Aww, Hooty’s there.

Vee is more babey when he speaks spanish.

Lmao. You’re gonna have three more kids once you meet King and the Twins. Maybe four, depending on the Collector. Or five, since Eda is kinda of a child sometimes. Wow, you’re gonna be busy.

Wouldn’t people find it suspicous to see four kids walking around town during school hours? Why aren’t they going to school, then again, it would cost a lot.

Babeys.

Luz, for the love of all things holy, get some therapy.

Pfft. Luz what the heck?

Aww, it’s nice to see other humans liking Luz...that better not be a prank...

Damn, imagine if Luz lost her dad from a car crash, this scene would have been really something.

Ugh, gross.

Dang. Nice, Hunter.

Babey Boy.

The back cover looks gay.

Flashbacks? Nice.

For some reason, I’m thinking of Marcy.

Oh, so it’s a nightmare.

Manny Noceda. Am I getting that right?

I’m gonna be honest, I have no idea what I should say about Camila’s nightmare.

Shit. I know this a serious moment, but look at the picture of Camila and Vee being cute together. Probably the last thing I should focus on.

You know that feeling where you feel like something’s bad is going to happen? I’m getting that from the egg.

Oh, god. That is disgusting and horrifying.

Hunter, no.

LMAO, Amity’s face!

Lmao, the Huntlow shippers are getting fed

Belos is gonna show up when Hunter’s alone, isn’t he?

God dammit, why am I always right? Can’t I be wrong for a change?

Lmao, Willow.

Are they watching Amphibia?

Gus is afraid of firelights. Amity is a mood with the circles.

WOLF! TO BE LIKE KING!

Siblings!

Is the shadow fucking necesarry

Luz looks weird smiling like that.

Wait, that black haired actress looks like Luz.

NO

Lmao, that’s saying it midly.

Huh, both of the siblings eyes glowed blue.

Fucking hell, he’s inside of him.

Damn, they went hard at the animation again.

Oh damn, having a basilisk on your team really is good.

AHH THAT WAS CLOSE. TOO CLOSE!

No...no...No! Hunter and Flapjack deserve to be happy together!

Lumity call back, I don’t remember which episode..

Aww...I thought Vee would be coming.

Lmao, Vee.

So Thanks to Them is just Season 3A jumbled together.

Wait...Thanks to Them....Thanks to Disney...LMAO

[flufffysocks]

let's talk about andi mack's worldbuilding

sorry this took forever to make! i've been pretty busy with school stuff and i kind of lost my inspiration for a bit, but i ultimately really enjoyed writing it! i wish i could've included more pics (tumblr has a max of 10 per post), and it kinda turned from less of a mini analysis to more of an extremely long rant... but i hope it's still a fun read!

i've been rewatching the show over the past few weeks (thanks again to @disneymack for the link!), and i’ve been noticing a lot that i never did the first time around. this is really the first time i’ve watched the show from start to finish since it aired, and it honestly feels so different this time - probably a combination of the fact that i’m not as focused on plot and can appreciate the show as a whole, and also that the fandom is much, much smaller now, so there’s a lot less noise. so the way i’m consuming this show feels super different than it did the first time, but the show itself doesn’t - it’s just as warm and comforting to me as it was the first time around, if not more so.

i think a lot of that can be attributed to andi mack’s “worldbuilding”. i’m not quite sure that this is the right word in this context, to be honest, because i mostly see it used in reference to fantasy and sci-fi universes, but it just sort of feels right to me for andi mack, because you can really tell how much love and care went into constructing this universe. for clarity, worldbuilding is “the process of creating an imaginary world” in its simplest sense. there’s two main types: hard worldbuilding, which involves inventing entire universes, languages, people, cultures, places, foods, etc. from scratch (think “lord of the rings” or “dune”), and soft worldbuilding, in which the creators don’t explicitly state or explain much about the fictional universe, but rather let it’s nature reveal itself as the story progresses (think studio ghibli films). andi mack to me falls in the soft worldbuilding category. even though it takes place in a realistic fiction universe, there’s a lot of aspects to it that are inexplicably novel in really subtle ways.

so watching the show now, i’ve noticed that the worldbuilding comes primarily from two things - setting and props, and oftentimes the both of them in tandem (because a big part of setting in filmmaking does depend on the props placed in it!).

one of the most obvious examples is the spoon. it really is a sort of quintessential, tropic setting in that it's the main gang's "spot", which automatically gives it a warm and homey feel to it. and its set design only amplifies this:

the choice to make it a very traditional 50s-style diner creates a very nostalgic, retro feel to it, which is something that's really consistent throughout the show, as you'll see. from the round stools at the bar, to the booths, to the staff uniforms, this is very obvious. the thing that i found especially interesting about it though is the choice of color. the typical 50s diner is outfitted with metallic surfaces and red accented furnishings, but the spoon is very distinctly not this.

instead, it's dressed in vibrant teal and orange, giving it a very fresh and modern take on a classic look. so it still maintains that feeling of being funky and retro, but that doesn't retract from the fact that the show is set distinctly in modern times.

of course, this could just be a one-off quirky set piece, but this idea of modernizing and novelizing "retro" things is a really common motif throughout the show. take red rooster records. i mean, it's a record shop - need i say more? it's obviously a very prominent store in shadyside, at least for the main characters, but there's no apparent reason why it is (until season 2 when bowie starts working there, and jonah starts performing there). a lot of the time, though, it functions solely as a record shop. vinyl obviously isn't the most practical or convenient way of listening to music, but it's had its resurgence in pop culture even in the real world, mostly due to its aesthetic value, so it's safe to say that it serves the same purpose in the andi mack universe.

the fringe seems to be nostalgic of a different era, specifically the Y2K/early 2000s period (because it's meant to be bex's territory and symbolic of who she used to be, and its later transformation into cloud 10 is representative of her character arc, but that's beside the point). to be honest, exactly what this store was supposed to be always confused me. it was kind of a combination party store/clothing store/makeup store/beauty parlor? i think that's sort of the point of it though, it's supposed to feel very grunge-y and chaotic (within the confines of a relatively mellow-toned show, of course), and it's supposed to act as a sort of treasure chest of little curios that both make the place interesting and allow the characters to interact with it.

and, of course, there's andi shack. this is really the cherry on top of all of andi mack's sets, just because it's so distinctly andi. it serves such amazing narrative purpose for her (ex. the storyline where cece and ham were going to move - i really loved this because it highlights its place in the andi mack universe so well, and i'm a sucker for the paper cranes shot + i'm still salty that sadie's cranes didn't make it into the finale) and it's the perfect reflection of andi's character development because of how dynamic it is (the crafts and art supplies can get moved around or switched out, and there's always new creations visible).

going back to the nostalgia motif though, the "shack" aspect of it always struck me as very treehouse-like. personally, whenever i think of treehouses, there's this very golden sheen of childhood about it, if that makes sense. i've always seen treehouses in media as a sort of shelter for characters' youthful innocence and idealistic memories. for example, the episode "up a tree" from good luck charlie, the episode "treehouse" from modern family, and "to all the boys 2" all use a treehouse setting as a device to explore the character's desire to hold onto their perfect image of their childhood (side note: this exact theme is actually explored in andi mack in the episode "perfect day 2.0"!). andi shack is no exception to this, but it harnesses this childhood idealism in the same way that it captures the nostalgia of the 50s in the spoon, or the early 2000s in the fringe. it's not some image of a distant past being reflected through that setting; it's very present, and very alive, because it reflects andi as she is in the given moment.

some honorable mentions of more one-off settings include the ferris wheel (from "the snorpion"), the alley art gallery (from "a walker to remember"), SAVA, the color factory (from "it's a dilemna"), and my personal favorite, the cake shop (from "that syncing feeling").

[every time i watch this episode i want to eat those cakes so bad]

these settings have less of a distinctly nostalgic feel (especially the color factory, which is a very late 2010s, instagram era setting), but they all definitely have an aura of perfection about them. andi mack is all about bright, colorful visuals, and these settings really play to that, making the andi mack universe seem really fun and inviting, and frankly very instagrammable (literally so, when it comes to the color factory!).

props, on the other hand, are probably a much less obvious tool of worldbuilding. they definitely take up less space in the frame and are generally not as noticeable (i'm sure i'll have missed a bunch that will be great examples, but i'm kind of coming up with all of this off the top of my head), but they really tie everything together.

for example, bex's box, bex's polaroid, and the old tv at the mack apartment (the tv is usually only visible in the periphery of some shots, so you might not catch it at first glance) all complement that very retro aesthetic established through the settings (especially the polaroid and the tv, because there's really no good reason that the characters would otherwise be using these).

besides this, andi's artistic nature provides the perfect excuse for plenty of colorful, crafty props to amplify the visuals and the tone. obviously, as i discussed before, andi shack is the best example of this because it's filled with interesting props. but you also see bits of andi's (and other people's) crafts popping up throughout the show (ex. the tape on the fridge in the mack apartment, andi's and libby's headbands in "the new girls", walker's shoes, andi's phone case, and of course, the bracelet). not only does doing this really solidify this talent as an essential tenet of andi's character, but it also just makes the entirety of shadyside feel like an extension of andi shack. the whole town is a canvas for her crafts (or art, depending on how you want to look at it. i say it's both), and it immensely adds to shadyside's idealism. because who wouldn't want to live in a world made of andi mack's creations?

and, while it's not exactly a prop, the characters' wardrobe is undoubtedly a major influence on the show's worldbuilding. true to it's nature as a disney channel show, all of the characters are always dressed in exceptionally curated outfits of whatever the current trends are, making the show that much more visually appealing. i won't elaborate too much on this, because i could honestly write a whole other analysis on andi mack's fashion (my favorites are andi's and bex's outfits! and kudos to the costume designer(s) for creating such wonderful and in-character wardrobes!). but, i think it's a really really important aspect of how the show's universe is perceived, so it had to be touched upon.

[^ some of my favorite outfits from the show! i am so obsessed with andi's jacket in the finale, and i aspire to be at bex's level of being a leather jacket bisexual]

and lastly, phones. this is a bit of an interesting case (pun intended), because the way they're used fluctuates a bit throughout the show, but i definitely noticed that at least in the first season terri minsky tried to avoid using them altogether. these efforts at distancing from modern tech really grounds the show in it's idealist, nostalgia-heavy roots, so even when the characters start using their phones more later in the show, they don't alter the viewer's impression of the andi mack universe very much.

so, what does all of this have to do with worldbuilding? in andi mack's case, because it's set in a realistic universe and not a fantasy one, a lot of what sets it apart from the real world comes down to tone. because, as much as this world is based on our own, it really does feel separate from it, like an alternate reality that's just slightly more perfect than ours, which makes all the difference. it's the idealism in color and composition in andi mack's settings that makes it so unmistakably andi mack. even the weather is always sunny and perfect (which is incredibly ironic because the town is called shadyside - yes, i am very proud of that observation).

the andi mack universe resides somewhere in this perfect medium that makes it feel like a small town in the middle of nowhere (almost like hill valley in 1955 from "back to the future"), but at the same time like an enclave within a big city (because of its proximity to so many modern, unique, and honestly very classy looking establishments). it is, essentially, an unattainable dream land that tricks you into believing it is attainable because it's just real enough.

all this to say, andi mack does an amazing job of creating of polished, perfect world for its characters. this is pretty common among disney channel and nickelodeon shows, but because most other shows tend to be filmed in a studio with three-wall sets, andi mack is really set apart from them in that it automatically feels more real and tangible. it has its quintessential recurring locations, but it has far more of them (most disney/nick shows usually only have 3-4 recurring settings), and it has a lot more one-off locations. it's also a lot more considerate when it comes to its props, so rather than the show just looking garish and aggressively trendy, it has a distinctive style that's actually appropriate to the characters and the story. overall this creates the effect of expanding the universe, making shadyside feel like it really is a part of a wider world, rather than an artificial bubble. it's idealism is, first and foremost, grounded in reality, and that provides a basis for its brilliant, creative, and relatable storytelling.

tl;dr: andi mack's sets and props give it a very retro and nostalgic tone which makes its whole universe seem super perfect and i want to live there so bad!!

[justalittlebluetiefling]

i CANNOT believe we haven’t talked about the moment yet what is happening please tell me the things you need to get off your chest like how ‘i’ll see you in the morning’ haunts you

HOW have we not talked about this yet?!?! Oh my gosh there’s so much. I have so many feelings about this conversation.

Uh oh, this needs a cut. Didn’t mean to turn this into an entire analysis of that conversation, but apparently I had a lot I needed to get off my chest.

How are YOU holding up with all this?!?!

I was really worried about you... when you fell. ... This suddenly feels far more serious than I thought it might be.

UMMMMM. His voice?! This whole time. His voice is like... unsteady and rough and he’s quiet the entire time. Fjord tends to be pretty subtle anyway, so quiet isn’t exactly rare for him, but this actually shook him to his core AND YOU COULD HEAR IT. It messed him up so bad that he threw all of his plans to wait out of the window?!

It felt like hell. It felt like torment.

And we have to stop it, right?

I’m emotional about THIS because JESTER?! She lost FIVE YEARS. Not only did she have to see this again, feel it, but she lost five years. And it’s clearly hurting her, but she’s not letting herself worry about it, because there are bigger things to worry about. It’s just the way both of them push their own emotions to the side to be dealt with later in favor of the larger problems at hand. It’s so admirable.

AND HE’S NOT EVEN... okay wait.

I... I may have a... a... a problem.

THE WAY HE CAN’T EVEN SAY IT. He’s so NERVOUS. Because he KNOWS why he’s THERE.

And JESTER. What is it? So fast! She’s so worried! She probably thinks it’s Uk’otoa or Kotho contacted Fjord about Sabian again or something.

I saw you standing on that pillar. It was the first time where I kept myself from... trying to... stop something that was happening TO you and... I didn’t do anything and it’s bothered me.

He has a problem. His problem is that he can’t focus past the fact that something might happen to Jester. THE THING HERE. IS THE EMPHASIS ON THE WORD ‘TO’. “Stop something that was happening TO you”. Like, all of the times throughout this campaign that we weren’t overanalyzing. We’ve made the list a thousand times and I don’t need to repeat them. here

ALSO. Think about how many things in Fjord’s life have happened TO him. He doesn’t WANT that to happen to anyone else. Especially not Jester.

But wait. Like. He didn’t say it, but he really CAN’T focus past the idea that Jester specifically might not make it out of this. The guilt he’s been carrying after the Iron Shepherds. He took all the responsibility of that onto his shoulders and I don’t think anyone realizes that he’s still hanging onto that.

It seems to have exacted a pretty serious toll.

It’s just... his voice! And the way Jester’s face falls!! I’ve been pretty worried about how Jester still seems to be putting up the ‘happy’ facade for everyone and you can truly see in this moment how much it bothers her that she’s lost time.

I want to come out of this and be able to go back to the sea and go back to Nicodranas and go back to where it’s warm and not fucking freezing and...

Me too.

They miss HOME. The poor Coast Kids miss their home. They’re both so sad. But okay. The hilarious thing here? Is that Fjord? Is talking about how he wants to go back. To THEIR home. With HER. And it hasn’t HIT HER yet, because she’s distracted! She has no idea what’s about to happen.

I just don’t know if that’s... I don’t feel as optimistic now.

Me neither. But... I’ll try to be safe. And you should, too. But if it comes down to it, if it means stopping that thing? I want to stop that thing.

AND HERE. What was it he said to her at Travelercon? And you care about people you know, about people you don't know. You cause chaos, but in the end, you don't want to hurt people. You care. This is something that he LOVES about her, but right now, it’s just... okay I’m trying to put this into the right words.

*sharp inhale* I told your mother I would look after you.

Yeah. I’ll be fine, Fjord. We always are.

Continued from the previous thought. HERE’S THE DEAL. Fjord knows he can’t protect Jester from this, no matter how much he wants to. His voice is breaking over that. And Jester’s is, too. They’re saying all these words here, but they’re also NOT. I don’t know. I’m watching the video again while I’m typing this, so this moment is breaking my heart in slow motion.

It’s not even just on Fjord’s side. Jester’s doing that thing right now where she deflects, because that’s what she does and trying to reassure Fjord because he’s never been so worried about her and she doesn’t know what else do to while Fjord is sitting here like we’re running out of time we’re running out of time we’re running out of time. Like, that’s the whole thing. He can see that they’re running out of time on Jester’s face. Literally. It was one thing for him to wait to tell her until after he sorted out his life when they felt invincible. But... out of all the danger they’ve been in before, he’s always been able to follow her. She’s never had to be alone in it, because he was one step behind her. And this time? There was literally nothing to do. He was powerless. He is powerless.

This part of the exchange is so loaded. You can FEEL Fjord about to break. It is tangible on the screen because his voice keeps shaking and he takes that huge breath.

IT’S JUST. He’s trying SO HARD. I always talk about this, but this one specific  time Travis was on Talks lives in my head rent free. The time when he talks about how much Jester’s unconditional and unrelenting support has meant to Fjord and how much Fjord wants to be able to return that. ALL he wants to do is be there for her and she’s still not opening up to him and he has NO IDEA if what he’s about to do is going to work. He has no idea if she’s going to be okay with what he’s about to tell her.

I care very much for you.

Really?

JESTER’S VOICE IS SO SOFT. SO SOFT. AND HE’S LOOKING AT HER. AND SHE’S LOOKING AT HIM.

I’m melting over this moment.

*huge sigh*

Is it because I have chiseled cheekbones now?

It’s the longer horns.

Yeah, it really does it, doesn’t it?

Yeah. It gives you an intimidating look.

YOU KNOW WHAT I LOVE ABOUT THIS?! Jester saw that Fjord was nervous and she immediately tries to defuse the tension with a joke. And he jokes back. Because that’s what they do together. They’re goofy and silly and they comfort each other and Fjord LIKES that she’s strong.

Listen I’ve got clips saved up from my last rewatch because I want to make a gifset of the times Fjord has been openly appreciative of strong Jester and one day I’m gonna do it.

I mean they’re joking around, but Fjord is like, super attracted to Jester and I really love that for her. But it’s MORE than that, because he’s attracted to her, but the thing that won him over was who she is so every time he talks about how attractive he finds her, it’s just icing on the cake. He doesn’t just want to see her, he wants to know her and I don’t know how I got to this point from this section but here I am, I’m not going back.

C A N I K I S S Y O U

OKAY.

I’m gonna hyperventilate again for a sec.

It caught Jester SO OFF GUARD. AND THEN SHE’S NODDING AND THEY’RE SMILING AT EACH OTHER LIKE THEY’RE SO IN LOVE AND IT’S JUST BEAUTIFUL HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO LIVE LIKE THIS

HOW.

Kissing is a lot more fun when you’re not dying.

Jester!!! She brought up the kiss! THEY SMILE AT EACH OTHER AFTER THIS. LIKE. They both acknowledge the “kiss that wasn’t a kiss” AS A KISS. I never thought we’d hear about this again! But Jester’s been thinking about it THIS WHOLE TIME!!!

I love this though. The first time, he kisses her to save her life so she can get them out of that temple. This time, he kisses her, because he can’t stand the idea of losing her.

BUT ALSO. KISSING IS FUN. Jester!!! Liked!! Being kissed! By Fjord!!!

I want them to have downtime so bad. I want them to be able to spend time walking around Nicodranas and kissing and going on little dates and eating ice cream at the Lavish Chateau and hanging out at the beach with Luc. I WANT THEM TO HAVE QUIET MOMENTS.

I don’t know what to do with myself anymore.

This was so cute! This last part might be my favorite part of the conversation. Because Jester got all flustered and FOR ONCE Fjord didn’t get awkward! He was just so RELIEVED to have told her! And she was so HAPPY?! The CUTEST grin on her face! EVER.

I’VE WANTED TO DO IT FOR A WHILE.

JESTER’S GIGGLE HERE!!!!!!!!!!! I love this for her so much. I just do. She’s been SO into him for SO long and she didn’t think he liked her back and here he is TELLING HER HE’S WANTED TO KISS HER FOR A WHILE. Her giddiness is contagious!

And FJORD! How LONG have you wanted to kiss her?! For some reason, this isn’t something I’ve considered when trying to figure out the timeline of Fjord’s feelings. When is the first time he wanted to kiss her? I think I need to go watch all their big conversations again to see if I think it’s any of them. For some reason, I feel like it’s going to be in one of those silly little moments they have together and I’m going to miss it. Do I rewatch the entire campaign for a third time???? Is that what I have to do?

I’m kind of a big coward.

No, Fjord, you’re very brave.

I am very brave, aren’t I?

You are.

Jester FULLY believes this. She’s just smiling over at him this whole time. But he looks down. Because he still doesn’t think he’s brave. Or he’s brave enough for most things, but there’s ONE THING he knows he can’t do and that’s let her go and I’M. 

Is this all just speculation and guessing and me making stuff up? Yes. Do I care? No. That’s what his face says to me in that moment.

ALL WHILE JESTER IS JUST SO HAPPY. She DOES think he’s brave and she thinks he’s amazing and he just kissed her and it’s not how she thought it would happen, but IT DID and it was so meaningful.

We could get cats and just flee.

I need to get the whole dialogue for this, but I’m tired tbh and I need to sleep, so I’m gonna focus on this last part. How they’re talking over each other to joke around, but it’s really smooth and flows really well between them. But right before this you can still see how heavily the upcoming trials are weighing on them. They feel a little better about EACH OTHER, but there’s a very real possibility that they’re about to lose each other, but they can take this ONE moment of hope?!

And I just love it when they joke around with each other to try to make each other feel better. They’re so good to each other. 

I’ll see you in the morning.

God, the way his voice is just ROUGH and small and quiet and he DOESN’T WANT TO LEAVE and they just SMILE AT EACH OTHER and they’re scared of what’s coming but THEY KNOW THEY LIKE EACH OTHER and they’re SO HAPPY FOR THIS MOMENT. 

And the soft way they say goodnight to each other!!!

THEY!!!!!!!!! make me want to walk into the ocean. In a good way. I SWEAR I CAN’T WITH THIS.

And then the way Jester sighed and giggled after Fjord left! And I can see her leaning back against her door and sighing and looking up at the ceiling and just..... SO. HAPPY.

She doesn’t even ask for a cat cuddle pile!!!! She just stares at her unicorn until she falls asleep. SHE DOESN’T ASK FOR A CAT CUDDLE PILE! 

And then there’s Fjord! Who doesn’t sleep much!

That part makes me a little more angsty. There’s lots of reasons he might be awake most of the night. There are some really cute ones. Like he’s thinking holy shit I just kissed Jester and she kissed me back and she said it was fun that’s good right? And then there are the angsty ones where he could have been laying there thinking about how he doesn’t have any control over the situation and how scared he is. But he did something and he made her smile and that’s all he ever really wants to do. Is make Jester happy. And maybe he made Jester happy in this moment where she was trying to hide that she’s sad. AND THE THING IS THAT HE DID! 

And I’ll leave you with a very short list of random things I expect them to say to one another at one point with no context:

I can’t stand the thought of losing you.

Are you sure you don’t miss the longer horns?

You don’t always have to be fine.

OH. ALSO. 

Get ready for casual intimacy. I’m ready for hand holding. Shoulder touching. brushing someone’s hair out of their face. GET READY BECAUSE IT’S GONNA HAPPEN.

[doyelikehaggis]

it’s time for the dreaded s6 finale emotions

*strong regret in projecting onto ryan as much as i do because this episode h u r t s*

tyler being the one to invite ryan along?? g a e

“can’t send a man to his doom without getting drunk first” he’s trying so hard to fit in. poor bastard. and not calling the others out for excluding him? you can just tell he’s trying so hard not to ruin it for everyone, and nobody even gives a shit. and then of course he eventually snaps, he’s just spent over an hour having to watch everyone have a great time and forget about him, and then alex suddenly expects him to have bought mike a gift, and they fucking tell him to stop being so selfish and god those fucking assholes

god the conversation where may-li tells charlie about her grandad. it’s so beautifully acted, emily burnett sells the denial perfectly, it just,, ow

this episode is hard to watch when you have really strong empathy and project onto both ryan and charlie. h e l p

wow charlie really just delivered a baby in a car in the middle of the woods huh. i keep forgetting how absolutely badass that is

you know what absolutely kills me is the vague suicide subtext to ryan running away. take that goddamn phone conversation out of context and that’s what it is and that’s the worst part of all of this. and chloe saying that he’s left a note and that “i think he’s really gone for good”. o u c h

the fact that NOBODY EVEN NOTICES RYAN’S GONE EXCEPT MIKE AND CHLOE. even tyler doesn’t fucking notice. and then everyone cares more that mike’s gone to find him than that ryan even left in the first place. but we’re not meant to think about that because tracy’s here and everything’s absolutely fine right. this episode is murdering me can you tell

lily complaining about men on that facebook post. bit fruity of her, i must say *‘a day in the past’ flashbacks*

i havent watched my mum tracy beaker yet but i really need answers on how it fits timeline-wise into the tsotb/tbr/tdg canon

the fact that chloe isn’t even wrong when she says everyone would hate ryan even more if they found out mike isn’t there ‘because of him’ (read: because he quite literally had a breakdown and ran away and mike, being the only decent person in this goddamn show, went after him)

ah yes tracy, care worker of the year, really just said ‘your problems don’t fucking matter, forget that anything’s wrong because mike is getting married’. i love tracy but wow that is not the thing you say in this circumstance and the only reason it worked was because he felt bad about the cake and whatnot

this episode has such an all over the place tone. they really just went from mike freaking out to fiona figuring out he’s gone to a damn slo-mo shot of tracy and mike on a bike while ryan sprints behind them.

oh my god i forgot bailey was in this episode!! i hate him (affectionate)

this goddamn episode is so full of emotions i almost threw up oops. anyway it absolutely kills me that ryan looks like he’s about to cry pretty much the entire time. that poor kid. and then chloe really just pulls a tee and apparently loses all empathy towards him huh. love chloe but wow

i don’t think we get a chance to read what ryan wrote in that note? but i kinda wish we did. could’ve given some extra insight into everything

i have no idea if any of this is coherent, or how much of it is an actual analysis and how much is me projecting but oh well, this episode(s) is a fucking emotional trainwreck, what can you do

Oh god. I'm not prepared.

*valid regret to have, that sad queer kid with anger issues and insecurities experience hurts real bad*

Yes!! Once again proving that Tyler is the only one in the DG who actually cared about Ryan and wanted to be around him. He was pissed at Alex for not inviting Ryan like he was initally supposed to, and then took it upon himself to make Ryan feel included anyway.

That scene really pisses me off, because Alex really is going after him. You can tell, he won't let Ryan make a single joke without trying to be snarky about it, and then he purposefully tries to humiliate Ryan because he knows that Ryan couldn't possibly have known to bring a gift.

Oh yeah, I can barely ever rewatch the first part of the wedding for all of these reasons, but especially for Charlie finding out about her grandad. Emily really is way too good of an actor, that's why it's so painful.

I relate way too much to the strong empathy and projection, that shit hurts so bad.

Yeah!! Charlie did that!! Honestly, credit to her because I would not have been as calm as she was on a normal day if I had to deliver a baby in a car in the middle of nowhere, never mind after everything she had been through that day.

Okay, so you found a way to make Ryan's whole storyline of those episodes hurt way more than it already did. Thanks for that. But you are right, it does have that vague subtext to it. If this wasn't a children's show, I would've actually been worried that's where they were going to go with his storyline.

It does suck that nobody really noticed or cared that Ryan wasn't there. I wish even Tyler had shown a bit more concern, but I suppose they've only got enough time in an episode for so much.

That was definitely one of Lily's fruitiest moments, and that's saying a lot because of the aforementioned "a day in the past" flashbacks. Honestly, all of her scenes with Carmen and some with Tee are always fruity, there's nothing else to it.

Okay, so, I can kind of answer that one. My Mum Tracy Beaker definitely carries on from The Story of Tracy Beaker since it involves clips of it when Tracy sees Justine. However, it's only really connected to tbr/tdg canon through vague hints. Like, Tracy has a published book called "Who Cares?" and there's a mention of her being an ex careworker, and she wears a "T" necklace but it's slightly different from the one that she wears in the wedding episode. So, we know there are subtle references to TBR through these background details that are really just glossed over. There is a weird little moment when Tracy's daughter tells Justine that Tracy wrote a book, but Justine should already know that considering it was a big part of their reunion in Tracy Beaker Returns. At best, we can at least assume that everything that happened in TBR is canon for My Mum Tracy Beaker. I feel like, if we want to be able to make the timeline for the wedding add up with My Mum Tracy Beaker, we'd have to assume that Tracy hadn't already had Jess during the wedding. Since the wedding takes place around 2018, and Jess is 10, My Mum Tracy Beaker would have to be set in 2028 at the very least, and that would have to mean that Tracy had Jess the same year as the wedding. Either that, or she did already have Jess but just... never mentioned her because she was staying with Cam.

It really does kill me that Chloe was right about that, because you'd think at least some of them would have some sort of sympathy for Ryan. I wish Tyler did. Honestly, he had a genuine breakdown and ran away, and no one cared except Mike. Great family they are.

Yeah, that was not Tracy's best moment, but... that's just Tracy. She doesn't think, she acts on what she believes to be the best solution in that very moment. She was never exactly an aware winning care worker in all fairness skjdashd but Ryan definitely needed to hear something other than that.

I could barely be sad or stress during that episode specifically because of how chaotic it was, and ESPECIALLY because of that slow-mo that had no right being so damn hilarious.

SHFKDASJDLK "I hate him (affectionate)" well at least I'm glad the (affectionate) is there lmao. But I was screaming when I realized Baily (and Liam) were there, I was so happy!!

Oh yeah, Ryan looked so upset, he was absolutely blaming himself so badly. There was no need for Chloe to come in there "wish you'd run away for real" like fuck off. I love her. But fuck off.

I don't recall actually seeing the contents of the note now that you mention it.

Yeah, don't worry, I'm not sure most of my reply to it is coherent either. But those are episodes are some of the most fun to analyse because Drama and Angst.

[princeoftheroses]

Since you want asks, PLSSSE I want your Utena TH0ughts. WHAT is your favourite black rose episode? actually how do you feel about the black rose arc in GENERAL

black rose arc, black rose arc, oh black rose arc!!! by you adding how do i feel about the arc in general you are unleashed me to make a long post giving my very disorganized thoughts about this arc.

a couple of people call it a filler arc? i guess technically it is because it does not directly contribute to the main storyline and it wasn't in the manga and also the ending of the arc sort of makes it so the whole arc kind of didn't happen???

but also i think if a person labeled it as a filler arc they are kind of missing the point?? even if it doesn't contribute to the main plot (which it absolutely DOES but i'll get to that) it adds so much nuance to the characters of utena.

you get to see side characters and how they tick!! some of which like kozue and shiori become very important later as they become miki and ruka's rose brides in the akio arc! (side note : what was up with ruka he just kind of showed up and disappeared lmaooo)

also, it adds to akio! (tw warning for only the next paragraph, i'm talking about akio so you can except me talking about grooming and abuse)

not only is this where akio is introduced, but he is always so omnipresent. it was ... honestly really terrifying to see how chill he acts with utena here. of course the real grooming begins in the akio arc but you can see how he starts here. how he kind of builds himself as anthy's cool older brother that utena can trust and ask for advice for... but we the audience know that he CANNOT be trusted as even know we see him being shady af in the background. i really feel like if we skipped straight from the first arc to akio arc a lot of the creepiness of akio would not have been realized because of ... just how NORMAL he akio acts to utena. he's charming, he's smart, and he overall is somebody utena SHOULD be able to trust bc we should all be able to trust an immediate family member of a best friend , but of course the world doesn't really work that way. anyway akio tangent over because BOOOOOO akio (he honestly terrifies me so much because of how many predators like that exist and you can meet without realizing their intentions)

BACK TO BLACK ROSE ARC

one of the main reasons i feel like this isn't a filler arc, at least not in the traditional sense of the phrase, is because it builds a lot character relationships. something that i didn't like when i first watched revolutionary girl utena but now is one of my FAVORITE things is that for a while we don't really get a straight forward utena/anthy episode. because their relationship doesn't need to build in an episode, it just slowly builds over time. we just see these two causally existing and they just start to trust each other.

in the akio arc we get to see just how close utena/anthy have gotten over the series because of their late night conversations. like how if the black rose arc didn't exist akio wouldn't have been as impactful, if the black rose arc didn't exist it would feel more sudden how close utena/anthy have grown imo.

this arc adds a lot to the world as well. as long as the students stay inside of school they will not grow. dead people wander the halls thinking that they are still alive. these two facts contribute a lot to utena theorizing and analysis (mainly, the ideas that ohtori exists within a plain of frozen time literally because of anthy's magic and metaphorically because the cast is very cozy in their coffin) and i could not thank this arc for that enough. not only are these very cool ideas that may or may not have inspired elements in my own story (i can neither confirm or deny that one of my oc story is heavily inspired by utena) but they just add so many layers!

this arc also felt necessary because of the new duelists??? if we went straight from the first arc to the akio arc then it would've kinda gotten very tiring to see the student council constantly duel and lose to utena (with the exception of touga's sole victory to utena in the first arc before she duels him again and wins) but these new duelists possessed by the black rose are very interesting!

if i did have to make a compliant about this arc, though, i will say that at times the stories felt very disconnected to each other. while it was very funny for utena to not even know who keiko was when she dueled her, it would've been nice if sometimes the arc of the black rose duelist intertwined more with utena. as the arc goes on, the student council is on alert and is trying to figure out where the black rose is coming from, but they never really try to ask utena about it and utena never really tries to get involved? she just is chill until she gets the note to go to the duel arena to fight the black rose duelist. i don't really have a solution on how to fix this? maybe have the student council member that the black rose duelist takes the sword from be more involved? idk.

the villain of this arc mikage also really fascinates me??? i... really like him??? but not even as a villain ... i just really pity him. the realization he has in his duel with utena that everything he has been doing is for nothing because mamiya is already dead .. that always really hit me? the horror in his voice when he starts to recall the truth in his false memories.... for some reason, this is one of the most terrifying parts of the show for me. the realization that something you were doing, something you were doing that might've been awful but you were doing it because of somebody you care about deeply and love, it was all for nought. how much time he has wasted...

even before his duel with utena, there's this moment when after he got punched by utena he says something like "if she hadn't seen my duelist ring and challenged me to a duel, she could've killed me" or something like that, he's just so pathetic and i feel very bad for him but at the same time am too disconnected to him to truly feel empathy for him... that's some TOP TIER shit

overall, this part of the show is one of my favorites. the only part i like more is the last few episodes because it makes me very emotional.

NOW FOR THE SPECIFICS

favorite black rose duelist: honestly? wakaba. the girl deserves it this is stress relief for her. not only is this duel very emotional as i don't think we've ever seen utena refuse to duel somebody (at least not in the way that she does in this episode) but just the SHEER emotion.

i'm a real sucker for fighting the person you care about the most which is why the dark signer arc in yugioh 5ds is the best yugioh arc and this just really takes the cake in this arc. utena always shows concern for the black rose duelist because they are clearly people in pain who were not able to properly duel with their grief which let mikage manipulate them, but it's taken to a new level here.

the way that after the duel is completed, wakaba comes home to her empty dorm where saionji used to be but now isn't always gets me. she's just such a lonely girl and that's never really resolved for her. a lot of the other duelists have a optimist note to end on (kozue asking miki for a milkshake, shiori and juri saying hello to each other as they walk past, keiko being friends with nanami again, etc.) which is why the fact that wakaba is more alone now then she is ever... it is a feeling i can relate to an almost embarrassing amount.

favorite episode: COWBELL OF HAPPINESS, NANAMI TURNS INTO A COW-

ANTHY YOU GLORIOUS TROLL-

favorite episode that isn't cowbell of happiness: i'm very torn between the landscape scaped by kozue and thorns of death. shiori and kozue are both very interesting characters that i like a lot. but i'm going to go with thorns of death for now, as while i really like the landscape scaped by kozue, i think my preferred miki/kozue episode is their episode in the akio arc. meanwhile i like thorns of death way more than i liked whispers in the arc (mostly because i just do not really care that much for ruka, but azure paler than the sky was a banger and he was in that?) i just loved the feeling of seeing shiori the girl juri loves so much and juri's reaction to seeing her. the way my heart was wrenched when black rose shiori mocks juri... it really did hit different. but the hopeful ending did make me feel a lot better. i do like the way that juri out of all the student council members is the one closest to self actualization and this really sets that up even if there is still a bumpy road until then.

honorary mention: the boys of the black rose and kanae as a black rose duelist are both really great. i feel like if this wasn't the arc opener it would've had more room to stretch its legs and show how horrific it could've been. kanae is a girl i feel really bad about and similar to wakaba, i don't really think her episode was a very optimistic ending for her especially since akio probably killed her later in the show?

honestly the minute akip appeared on screen, engaged to a girl who HASN'T EVEN GRADUATED and is also emotionally manipulating her so much and having his little sister manipulate her too... throw the whole man away

tl;dr - the black rose arc is very good and i like it a lot, the ending of the arc really fucks me up, somebody give mikage & all the black rose duelists therapy, throw akio in the garbage, and this show probably exists in some sort of time loop / frozen time space as a metaphor for the whole coffin thing but you can probbaly find people smarter than me talking about that.

oh and go rewatch cowbell of happiness it's great