#No kidding I was crying for two hours

[danicloth]

I decided to be happy and believe 💙

I know Vander is too far gone and Jinx is probably alive, but the things I felt in that scene… man 💔

[moeblob]

This is all because I wanted to draw Arven with a lil braid and it got out of control with me letting my kids be friends.

Some formal event and Arven is like "I'll bring this along because Penny will probably have one" and then they don't have one so he has to give them his. And he's like "ok so i have heard of a security blanket but not a security boa......".

[lukreziaaa]

Clara…my Clara.

[faaun]

procrastination is starting to have its consequences finally

[britneyshakespeare]

i know i've been very culty on here about period underwear and reusable period products in general whenever i've brought up the topic in the last year or so but i mean it sincerely. i have never spent my money on a product that just simply improved my life so much. game-changing isn't even the beginning of it. i look forward to how much better my periods are now since i no longer have to depend on gross disposables. period underwear is the shit

[spacemancharisma]

.

[anxiously-sidequesting]

So I've been Sinning because I've been making posts on Malorn and Duncan individually but I don't think I ever really touched up on how their relationship with EACH OTHER would be and that's literally the most traumatizing thing I can think of for either of them

This is like, moreso purely speculation and 🌈 imagination🌈 anyways because I don't think there's like any canon material on the two of them interacting and their arcs and backstories are as small as bacteria in the first place but literally those two on their own could have their own fucking show with how much UNTAPPED STORYLINE that can come out of "Borderline child prodigy forced into and struggling with important position" Malorn and "Troubled child with undiscussed emotional issues and a jealousy complex borne from said position" Duncan

Idk about any type of interaction or relationship these two might have had before Malistaire became the Joker, but I can imagine there's ALREADY some type of rivalry (at LEAST one sided) between two guys in the same school in the same class, one of them is blatantly better than the other at everything they do and it's not the guy who says he is. (Like, idek how Malorn himself feels about him being the best in his class, but from what we've seen he doesn't brag about, mislead, or exaggerate about it like Duncan does. And the insane thing is Malorn AT LEAST would have a BASIS on his claims and attitude even if he was being a jerk about it)

But the thing is, Malorn back then as a regular student would not have been in any position to be up close and personal with Duncan in any meaningful way during school hours. Like they're classmates, at best they get grouped on a project together, but Malorn and Duncan being together would not be required and important until AFTER Malistaire dips and Malorn is now Duncan's PROFESSOR. Now in a totally more complicated and intimate way than before, Malorn and Duncan HAVE to interact with each other, speak and work with each other because now Malorn is the new Death teacher and he has to handle the brunt of Duncan's education and progress. GIRLS YOU NEED TO READ THAT LAST PART AGAIN BECAUSE THAT IS SO IMPORTANT!!!!!!!

Malorn and Duncan literally CANNOT escape each other if they wanted to do their jobs (good, unbiased educator and student still receiving education respectively). Yeah they may not be like, personal tutor and student but Duncan is in MALORN'S class now, and just that position alone puts a type of pressure on both of them to still maintain their respective roles and civility while dealing with the person who Does Not Make You Happy on a more personal level than before. That sucks actually

Like, Duncan couldn't even lie to Malorn about how "well" he's doing in Death class when he can SEE his papers. Duncan can't hide his grades papers from his professor, Duncan is no longer able to pull the wool over Malorn's eyes like he does with EVERYONE ELSE. Duncan already had some type of issues with being second best, but imagine one of the people that was threatening Duncan's spot as first place becomes his superior. His superior that can SEE that Duncan is in fact, not the best. Duncan can't even PRETEND that Malorn isn't better than him anymore because it's been proven, when Malorn was made Professor instead of him, and Malorn himself now has an inside view of Duncan's insincerity. What little ""power"" Duncan thought he had was now ALL taken away from him

AND THEN MALORN DOESN'T HAVE IT MUCH BETTER, because here's this little shit that just seems to hate him for no reason???? Idk if Malorn ever knew about Duncan bragging about himself or his jealousy of him in general before Malistaire left, but whether or not he did before he most likely knows NOW. With his new position and him having to care for Duncan as a student rather than a peer, now suddenly Malorn is in Duncan's DIRECT line of fire and he has no wiggle room to step aside or remove himself because in order for Malorn to be a good teacher *he has to be there for Duncan*. He no longer has the luxury to just "ignore" Duncan or even put him in his place if that's what he really wanted, because now Malorn has to be a certain type of responsible and not abandon or get into fights with students that give him any issues (looking at you Malistaire and Mabrose 😒)

Yeah ofc Malorn could always discipline Duncan or smth but what's the use if this one student is just adamant on causing issues? It seems like Duncan has more of a 'hands off' type of technique when trying to get what he wants (using other people to finish his homework for him), but it's super easy to imagine Duncan just doing little or petty things to undermine Malorn's authority in any way he can. Nothing evil but just like challenging or questioning Malorn's lessons during class, mouthing off whenever he can, things that are used to blow off steam and stick it to Malorn in what little way he can definitely sounds like some shit Duncan would do. And what are you supposed to do when this kid, someone who is YOUR AGE but is still essentially supposed to be listening to YOU, is lashing out at you and disrupting class every chance he gets? Discipline him for the hundredth time?

Imagine how this grates on Malorn's nerves how on top of everything else, on top of everyone else already being jumpy and snippy around him, in addition to his entire lifestyle being turned around, even with his tutor and someone he looked up to betraying him in the worst way, even with ALL OF THAT, this *ooooooone* person decides to go out of their way to continuously punish you for it. Malorn is doing his job, what he's expected of no matter how unfair or tiring or unrewarding it may be, and he is being persecuted by someone for a job *he never even asked for*.

Malorn did not plan or hope for ANY of this to happen. Yeah being a Professor sounds cool and shit at first glance but like I've said once before Malorn at that time is still like 12 years old and the change is so absolutely sudden and jarring that Malorn couldn't have even possibly PREPARED for this situation. Whether or not Malorn is actually good at his job now does not push aside the fact that Malorn may not have even WANTED to be in that job in the first place!! We have no way of knowing if Malorn was seriously like "man I wish I was a teacher right now" at ANY point of his life, but it's safe to say he most likely DID NOT because Malorn was never flaunting or showcasing his talent to everyone like Duncan was!! Perhaps the one person who wants this THE LEAST is being unfairly judged by the person who wanted it THE MOST

AND THAT ^^^^^^^ is getting to the core of this Malorn VS. Duncan thing going on here. Two opposites, two extremes that are forced together unwillingly and they're both unnecessarily suffering for it.

And at the end, when The Wizard is trying to do shit and Duncan pops up like "aaayyyy 🤪🖕" and is defeated in 2 seconds, how does that affect them both? Does Malorn ever like, know this about Duncan? Did Duncan even graduate before he was manipulated into a literal cult?

Imagine how messed up Malorn would feel if he ever found out. Would he take it personally, even though none of it was his fault? Would he still FEEL that it was his fault, that the one person who hated him sooo much it became the catalyst to his downfall? Would Malorn feel responsible for Duncan and all the hurt he's caused and all the hurt he's felt even though he shouldn't?

And the saddest part is even if Malorn did suffer any type of way from knowing how Duncan turned out to be, his responsibilities wouldn't leave him that much time to mourn before he had to go back to work. The saddest part is that even though Duncan was told over and over that he was alone and that nobody cared for him, he had Malorn by his side the entire time more than willing to support him. Their relationship is so interesting to me because it's so tragic and multifaceted when ultimately things could have been at least moderately better if the world hadn't let them both down

[gently-decaying-flowers]

i just finished s3 of young royals

i am

sobbing

[good-beans]

👏👏👏

[guinevereslancelot]

being moved to a different classroom for my last week while the head of the program pretends she's doing me a favor but she's really doing my supervisor a favor 🙃

[avocado-frog]

Month old writing share game

Thanks for the tag from @elsie-writes i procrastinated hard on this one but I think that the rules are just to share a bit of writing. So here's a little chunk from something I just wrote:

One time, a few years back, when Logan was nineteen, Lily was twelve, Jaxon was just about eleven, and Dylan was eight, they went to the park. He took them to the park to distract them, sometimes, but he didn't remember the specific reason that time around. Dylan had wandered off a little while after helping Logan pack sandwiches at home- after Lily and Jaxon already left- to go to the garden. Two older men, fifties or sixties, one in blue overalls and the other in a plain, grey shirt were teaching them how to use a rake. A woman a bit younger, dirty blonde hair in a bun behind her head, had a pocket of seeds for Dylan to plant. Logan sat on the bench to watch them, a bit warily. But they seemed friendly enough. Jaxon, usually, would run off to go find people to play with. He was sociable, he liked making friends, but even that day, as sunny as it was, it was still too early for kids his age to start coming over. Mostly, it was the parents of toddlers who wanted their kids to run off some energy. Sometimes, the toddlers would try and get him to play, too, and Jaxon obliged every time, but he seemed content with just his sister today. He didn't have any interest in gardening with Dylan. Lily was by the monkey bars, standing on top of the black platform underneath them. Jaxon sat on the ground, digging a hole in the bark with his hands. Lily jumped up to grab the bars, but she was getting tall enough that she didn't need to jump as high now. Once she had a grip on the yellow metal, she pulled herself up to sit on the top. She sat there for a while, talking to Jaxon about something Logan couldn't hear at the distance he was, and given his attention was split between them and Dylan.  Lily had swung her legs over the bars and leaned down in between the gaps to hang upside down, and of course Jaxon wanted to try.  He jumped up, just like Lily did, grabbed onto the bars, and it should've been a forewarning when his hand slipped before he regained his hold. He jumped up to sit on the top bars, and then his leg got caught in between, and he fell backwards trying to untangle himself.  He had picked the bar closest to the platform. Hanging upside down, right above the edge of the black platform, with his leg stuck in between the bars. He must not have been really thinking past getting his leg unstuck. Logan heard a woah, are you okay, that caught his attention just as he managed to free himself. And then he fell. And hit his head on the edge of the platform and hit it again as the rest of him landed in the bark. Jaxon hadn't even cried, which was astonishing to Logan, who had shot up like a rocket and rushed over to check on him. Because Logan would've cried hard if he hit his head like that. Twice. Lily had scrambled down to see if he was okay, too, but Jaxon only sat in the bark, moved to sit with his legs outstretched, one hand making a circle in the wood bits, blinking like he was confused. There was a steady stream of blood gushing from his nose, too. His eyes weren't quite uneven yet, but Logan didn't think for a second that Jaxon got away without a concussion. He instructed Lily to go watch Dylan, tell them where he went, while he took their brother home to check on him. Jaxon blinked again. Logan grabbed him by the arm, dragged him to his feet, and dragged him home, having to hold his own sleeve against his nose because Jaxon wasn't doing it himself.

Open tag since this is a month and a half old sorry lmao

[god-has-entered-my-body]

pure terrifying turbulence is brat

[nunyverse-scribe]

Me when my head is pounding from crying over a conversation that kinda just reinforced all the shittiness I went through while also throwing me for a loop on whether or not I’m valid for feeling the way I feel, but I have to repress all of that bc ✨employed citizen✨

[listen-to-the-inner-walrus]

me, listening to a podcast about a guy in prison based entirely on a coerced confession: what do you mean the members of the jury still think hes guilty now that they know about coerced confessions??? did you not hear four police officers interrogating and shouting at a 19-year-old while hes sobbing through a story inconsistent with the actual evidence???? there was no other evidence, how do you still think hes guilty???

me, ten minutes later: ...oh, right. if they say hes not guilty, that means they sent an innocent kid to prison. yeah, now that uh makes sense.

[melviships]

I have a secret fixation I won't say the name of out loud because it's pretty... on the nose with writing in spite of being compelling with the concept and world building. It has flaws, undoubtedly, but I love it nonetheless. It is an indie production and falls prey to the "has so much to say but sacrifices clarity in fear of early termination". And it's 3D animated which often gets flack, which I find unfair due to the effort such a style requires. On top of it all, the same production company released a pilot that went viral very recently.

And yet I find myself hesitant to share my love for it, something I find odd given my tendency to embrace unbridled joy even when the subject doesn't seem to warrant such a thing.

Being vague because I see the main characters as my kids and I didn't know what to do about it- and the parents were just shown more in the latest episode and um.

I think I might want to, I dunno, be the third in this ???? My age is starting to show. I don't want kids, I don't want to have kids, I don't want to be a parent. But... consider... polyamory. Consider, they aren't my kids, but I am the partner of a parent.

I hope this makes sense, I'm having a moment evidently.

[wickedhawtwexler]

i'm annoyed by one (1) irritating noise coming from my neighbors' apartment. i'm going to relocate to a coffeeshop full of people and sit right next to a noisy machine.