#ND-coding

[lokiinmediasideblog]

This is not drama. This is prompted by a tweet about someone saying they would write about how MCU!Loki works as a seamless late-autism diagnosis metaphor. But I totally agree! And I am looking forward to their essay.

Whereas the "inter-racial adoption" analogy has a lot of flaws on it, being that MCU Loki is played by a white actor (and other messy optics), the late-autism diagnosis analogy is FUCKING PERFECT. There's also a long tradition of autism analogies being about "different planets", "changelings", and "aliens", which Loki is in cannon.

And I think one of my first posts was a reblog on how he works perfectly as an analogy for the queer neurodivergent experience of feeling like you're unlovable for some elusive reason only you seem to be unaware of. But I am not sure if I should put it here because I am trying not to traumadump.

I know someone who was diagnosed as a toddler for autism but their parents were like "We won't tell them so that they're not hindered and don't feel different." That's basically Loki's whole ordeal.

Because people can somehow tell that you're different and they hate you for it. Your friends are never yours. They're the friends of whoever decided to tolerate you to make you into their little project only to toss you out once they get sick of you.

If you have neurotypical siblings, you constantly get compared to them because, 'Why can't you be like them!?" You feel like they are always expecting the worst from you.

You feel like you are actually a great liar, because you've had to pretend all your life. Everyone makes it clear that they can barely tolerate you. So you play it up to seem amusing and endearing and funny. This even works with Loki's skill set of illusions!

It's just so perfect.

[vanderdyks]

I geniunely cannot stand when allistics try to say Resident Alien is actually making fun of autistic people because they believe Harry is too childish now because I JUST-

In the beginning, Harry tried SO MUCH HARDER to fit in with the humans around him. He mimicked their speech patterns, consistently observed them, emersed himself in their activities so they wouldn't suspect he was different.

The Harry now? He doesn't care. He's loud in places he should be quiet. He talks how he wants. He laughs FREELY. He's learned large crowds of people? Not for him. He doesn't like being touched by strangers.

He's just Harry. Himself. Because he can be. Because he's realized even if some of the people of Patience find him strange, it doesn't matter. They'll never guess he's from outer space.

Have you noticed that every other alien we have seen is not like Harry? Not the greys, or the half human hybrids, not even Heather. When Heather is around humans who know she is an alien, we get to see the difference, but when she isn't? She fits in so well with any other neurotypical human.

Not Harry though. So yes, he is autistic because I said he is. Because I am autistic. And if you're allistic, you don't get to tell autistic people they shouldn't headcanon Harry as autistic (even though it is very obvious they're purposefully playing him as neurodivergent now.)

When you take an autistically coded character that a lot of autistic individuals relate to, and try to argue the character is actually a "child" and being "infantalised," you're actually being ableist.

You're saying that the traits we have resonated with are childish... Harry seems like he's "regressed" because instead of trying to adapt and pretend to be human, he is becoming something else entirely. Not human, but not fully alien either.

The body of doctor Harry Vanderspeigle was once just a disguise. Now it IS Harry's. It's his body, his own skin. And he's gotten comfortable in it and you know this because you deliberately witness times where he might be holding his hands like he would his claws (primarily when he's sleeping.) His brain doesn't realize he's not in his normal form, because in many ways, this is his new normal form.

He has emotions. He cares. He's in completely new territory and finding himself. And in doing so, that carefully crafted human mask? It's fallen a bit.

So that thing you label as "regression" is a thing I label as progress. He's learning still. Let him learn. Let him be. And give it time. And I hope to GOD Harry never becomes fully human to the point we can't recognize him. I hope he never loses his unique inflictions, or his love for pizza and pie. I hope he continues to love the quiet. I hope he ALWAYS laughs obnoxiously. I hope he always runs like he doesn't know what to do with his limbs. I hope you always see his emotions throughout his body because they simply cannot be contained. I hope he continues to jump when excited or pace when he's angry. I hope he stays obsessed with Law & Order forever.

Because if you take all that away, you're taking away the bits that make him Harry. You want a carbon copy human. I want the autistic alien struggling to understand human nature.

That being said, of course you can express your opinion him. And it can be discussed because everyone is going to have a different perspective.

But you don't get to dictate an autistic perspective if you are not autistic. Or try to cancel anyone for it either.

I love Harry. And I relate to him SO MUCH. And I love how much representation I can see him through him for me. Because I personally believe Alan and the writers have chosen to keep presenting this character as ND.

It's okay to dislike the direction of his character development. It's okay to find the flaws. It's okay to share that perspective. What's NOT okay is dictating the feelings of others because they might not agree with you.

I don't find him childish. I see him as an autistic individual trying to navigate a society that his brain hasn't been hardwired to understand.

And if you think he's too childish, please look closer at the why you think he is. Really be introspective on this one.

Because Harry is a parent. And has a child. And he has relationships. And he takes care of himself. Not only that, he is the town doctor and takes care of everyone else too. He is the smartest. He is the strongest. None of the characters have had to worry about the wellfare of Harry specifically. Its why no one realizes the greys have captured him. Because of course Harry would be fine, hes the alien expert. He knows what he's doing. So while everyone else spent so much time worrying about each other, no one was left to worry about Harry.

So ask yourself why you believe Harry has become "too childish" and if your answer comes down to any of his quirky traits or his misunderstandings of human nature, then you really need to consider if what you're actually uncomfortable with is autism/autistic traits.

[benjingler]

Unintentionally trans-coded characters, whose transness is represented by monsters

Drops mic

[matchamiko]

Wriothesley is so husband shaped; those big shoulders for sleeping on snuggled in bed, thick forearms to bite when he’s fucking you down into the mattress, capable hands for kneading dough when you don’t want to, beautiful kind eyes that are the first thing you see in the morning, big wide hairy chest for leaning on in the bath, such a strong back for hoisting furniture around when you want to change the sitting room around, legs heavy and wide enough to sit on as you arrange flowers you’d both bought from the farmers market, fingers weathered from work and age sitting pretty between your thighs.

[rebuke-me]

the pilot program are all autistic in this essay i will

[shiningstarr15]

I am asking, no BEGGING this fandom at this point to PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE start depicting Vanessa more as a silly, dorky, awkward, girlfailure loser. Bc THAT IS WHO SHE IS.

Yes she is attractive, but she’s also just an absolute disaster. She’s a disheveled mess, she has massive eyebags, can’t do her makeup worth shit, pulls her pants up to her fucking belly button, walks like she’s a goddamn question mark, can’t talk to people (or animatronics) worth shit, literally MOCKS people (that is CANON), and literally just has no idea what she’s doing at any point whatsoever.

She’s a dork ok. She would rather play video games than literally do anything else. She has a glittery pink journal with goddamn puppies on it, she bakes cupcakes and has rainbow hair extensions. She put toe beans on a RABBIT costume when RABBITS DO NOT HAVE TOE BEANS. DORK!

Even in the MOVIE, she’s a soggy loser. She threw a man’s sleeping pills in the river, she threatened to SHOOT a man on sight if he ever brought his kid sister back to Freddy’s. She asked said man to dance in the most awkward way possible, and she actively built a fort with a bunch of ghost kids haunting animatronics.

So please. Literally on my hands and knees BEGGING this fandom.. MAKE HER THE SILLY DORK LOSER SHE IS. She’s not a ‘serious’ character. She’s overly anxious and screams at people bc she can’t control her own emotions. Take a better look at her character and I promise you’ll see it!

PLEASE!

[chrliekclly]

oh charlie kelly loose identity tied to emotions nd changing on a whim we're really in it now....

[wildaboutchu2000]

18matsu au....................

reika belongs 2 @mushimatsu :3

[r0semultiverse]

Hey, what the fuck? WHAT THE FUCK??

"12 years ago"

"Open your mind!"

Ice Queen counterpart's ice cream machine is a portal???

[rosemarytales]

Ellie knows the answer

[just-sp-in-inginthevoid]

Autistic (at least ND) Kawata twins:

Smiley can't make eye contact while Angry stares into your soul

smile to mask - resting bitch face (not on purpose)

same thing with their voice (don't control intonation+volume very well)

^ lead to struggle with socialization

low to no empathy - hypersensitive

(drawn by violence, no sense of danger? - dislikes violence; only here to make sure his brother's safe and keeping him in check)

canonically likes plastic models and mangas but hides it to be popular (*cough* hiding your SpIns from others? *cough* being ashamed of them ? *cough* relatable *cough*) (also adds to struggle with socialization)

naturally knows how to make perfect ramen

both have a hyposensitivity to pain (OR - they don't know how to properly express it)

the several moments Smiley sit 'oddly'

cries when overwhelmed and lashes out (in their flashback/when they were young at least), perhaps meltdown

ramen is their comfort food btw. Wakui told me

(not but seriously, they swap expression when they eat ramen, that's so precious)

blunt, very straightforward

[lokiinmediasideblog]

Saw a post that Loki fits in way better with the TVA than he ever did in Asgard, where he's just tolerated,his illusions power-set sounds a lot like masking, and has that whole reveal about being an alien/changeling. And I think this further promotes my belief that Loki is very ND-coded (strong ADHD/AuDHD vibes), given that there's multiple Loki series characters that are very autism-coded (e.g. OB, Casey, Mobius, Timely).

[shadowspirez]

if you aren't at least a little weird about the squip, then honestly what're you even doin!

that tictac is literally a gaslight gatekeep girlboss, mansplain manipulate manslaughter! the potential!!!

you can't hate him, officer, he's literally just a little guy!

[darth-kote]

[shiraishi--kanade]

A little bit concerning now autism-coding evolved from originally meaning "this character is said or implied to be inspired by a real person from the writer's life who later ended up discovering they're autistic or were actually always autistic, or that we can arguably assume were autistic; while this is almost never a conscious writing decision it is a representation of autistic people always being around and someone caring and loving them enough to make them into a story, and are therefore relatable to other autistic people in a unique way because they were never intended to be written as Token Autistic but instead as a full person and avoided the harmful tropes connected to autism" to now "actually this character is autistic and the writers Always Wanted to State That they just couldn't because #evilcensorship. Source trust me bro"

[zmb1eslut]

Luke Castellan x hypnos!fem

tags: non-romantic relationship, fluff, Luke's pov.

summary: Luke Castellan was found by the way out his nightmares.

1,6k words

-

Luke remembered it quite clearly, the night in which the whole... something between them came to be what is now.

He was sweaty and drained, being the only wishful thought he felt brave to feed, for the air to reach his lungs so he could run a little further. He had lost all his will, and he was now running on the only thing stronger than his determination, his fear.

Both Titan and kid could feel it, that night he was fated to succumb to the torture. His mind had already given its last pleadful breath when his foot tripped and his face met the floor. And he now cannot phantom the thought of how different his life would be if he hadn't lifted his head, she hadn't been there.

Luke saw her sitting, with a blank expression on her face, looking down at him. His hand reached for her never expecting to actually be aid, she took it and pulled him towards her. Once they were close to each other she said to him in a bizarrely sweet voice "Your screams were getting too loud". That was the last time the girl acknowledged his presence, as well as the last time he felt that sort of fear.

Somi kept rescuing him like that every night. She never explained why. Luke never asked her either. He would only sit there in what he guessed were the girl's own dreams, and wake up in the morning with just a thin grasp of the events.

Most things about the dreams (and the dreamer herself), were awfully confusing for the swordman-boy. He felt like she looked at reality with an eager infatuation, like she knew that guy better than the arbitrary rules that defined him ever could. Being inside her mind perhaps was making a number on him. Perhaps that's why she at some point stopped posing as the spacey buzzed girl everyone meditated with at times, and held herself in a homely sort of normality he developed a liking for.

She showed a part of her no one else ever saw. Altough it would probably be more precise to say she eventually stopped hiding it. Being honest with himself, Luke admitted that he toyed with the idea of him having found her.

She acted exasperated, bored, mean. She behaved like any person he would never mistake for her on the other world would behave. Their exchange right now was especially out of character.

She had entered his dream, as every night. She stepped in front of him and pushed his shoulders down, when he fell, he was met with the softness of a bed. Tonight's dream was apparently on a room. "Sorry for the mess." She said to the boy's surprise. He wasn't opposed to a change on their routine.

"Kinda used to it and all." he said. She answered with an understanding nod. "Did anything happen?" the Hermes boy asked just to keep this anomaly alive, to which she sighed.

"Evan just left." Curiosity flourished on the boy's throat.

"Like the real one?" the girl took way too long to answer and started stroking his hair while she thought.

"No... the dream one. But I'm pissed at him. And that's a naptime dream" she answered as if it was obvious. Even more questions arose, so she explained "Those are the dreams you aren't supposed to watch." Huh...

"What dreams I'm not supposed to watch?"

"You know, Castellan." she really meant it, he didn't had a clue. She got close to him to whisper teasingly, even knowing no one would really be able to hear. "The inappropriate ones" Oh.

He understood fast though, making sense of what teenager needs usually were. "I was naive on that one, wasn't I?"

"I mean..." she said chuckling while walking away from him. She sat down on a chair in front of a desktop. The place was humorously colorful.

"Ok. But like... Evan? Does that happen often?" He asked almost gossiply.

"I mean! Not anymore! He's a total prick." that made him laugh.

"Is he?" Luke asked, enjoying seeing her so annoyed, especially as he wasn't the cause.

"Yes. And you know what? I hate that, I hate this. Cause he goes around just getting the fuck he wants, and then pretends he 'didn't mean it like that'. Then I get mad, and he thinks I'm pretty when I'm mad, and I get pissed off when he says that, and then I'm horny when I'm pissed. And you know what? He doesn't deserve horny me." Sometimes she just was that unexpectedly honest. Luke just listened amused. She looked up and let out a frustrated groan. "And now I have to take care of you." That made him laugh, but he didn't want her to know that.

"C'mon I'm not that difficult" he pretended to be offended.

"No. But right now you're truly inconvenient" He put his hands up in the air as his sign of surrender before laying down in the bed. She stayed silent for a minute and Luke almost thought they went back to normal. The girl usually was quiet and still, looking lost into the air, or, only the contrary, highly invested in a task and barely paying him attention. Now she was neither, the chair was slowly spinning with her wearing a childish expression. She controlled every aspect of every scenario he had observed, and even when she didn't feel like going strong at it, she would prove her domain by popping something for him to distract himself. He took note of that when he saw a ray of sunlight entering the window, leaving a path she was now following in his direction. She was standing in front of the side of the bed again. "Sit." she said, way too used to having control over here. And, listen, he wasn't about to oppose an emotional all powerful being. Once he stood straight, she st looking taller than him, barely. She supported her arms on the top of his head. And sighed again. "I hate men".

"Oh, they are terrible" he teased.

She stayed silent for a bit, he was just being used as a table. Then he heard her. "What do you think about... weird". He understood perfectly.

"I've met so many demi kids, that word just simply lost meaning at some point"

"Ok, then..." she took a step back and looked at him now, lowering her head a bit. "do you consider me pretty?" He took a second to look at her, then shrugged and nodded. "Great then... tell me when to stop." She said while sitting on his lap, with both her legs at his left side, and reaching for his left hand. The girl held it against her face and started nuzzling against him. He couldn't ignore the thought that her actions weren't sexy at all, not as much as they were needy. She was like a cat looking for attention, and he truly didn't mind. He lifted his right hand to caress her hair, and she gave in to the touch. She had closed her eyes and moved the hand of her face down to her outer thigh.

His strong hand gripped her skin, almost performatively. He flirted using a lower voice. "What do you want?" his nose under her jaw, his breath against her neck.

The answer came only with her voice, as she didn't even bother to open her eyes or explore his touch. "I'll let you know when you're doing it wrong." Moody, bossy, and assertive. This was not more than a game for them. This was just a caprice. What is wrong with wanting things that feel right?

The girl held onto his left bicep and hid her face on his neck. They just stayed like that for a couple minutes. Somi hiding on his arms when Luke faintly felt the scent of her hair.

"Why did you rescue me?" wasn't enough to disrupt the comfortability of their scene.

"I already told you why."

"I wasn't screaming tonight."

Then the silence prolonged itself for longer than he would have chosen. The girl just gently pushed his body with hers, making them lay on the bed, side by side, looking into the ceiling.

"We... don't really know each other." He agreed with the sentiment on silence. "But, we both have been here for years so I know you know me." Of course he did. "And everybody knows you." He felt like he didn't quite know what she meant by it. "Luke 'the greatest swordsman in the last 300 years' Castellan, a born leader whose smile has infatuated half our population of half-bloods, who is always there to help when someone gets hurt."

Luke analyzed those words for a couple of seconds. Apparently not enough seconds. "Do you... like me?" She laughed.

"I don't mean it like that!" She then took a pause and moved her head to look at him, he followed. "What I'm trying to say is. There are so many children looking up to you, learning from your effort, going to sleep smiling because they know you'll be there to protect them, and when they fail... you don't make them feel like they failed you. I guess for a second I realized how much our spirit was relying on you. I thought maybe you needed someone to rely on too. I'm sorry if I'm making it awkward now." He didn't know how to answer, her eyes on his were feeling heavy for a second so he escaped by closing them. He didn't know how to answer so he just breathed and hugged her, hoping she wouldn't tease him about his heart rate. She didn't. She hugged him back.