#Ludwig does everything

[loadingbones]

Skin/hair colour refs for myself

[einaudis]

I honestly love the way "Can You Hear The Music" is/will be carrying the entirety of the Best Score category this season. I mean, the whole soundtrack is beautiful and I know there are other great candidates, but I haven't seen this adoration for ONE piece of an ENTIRE soundtrack in a while.

[sinecosinewheel]

dunno if this is the popular interpretation but i like to think the hunters dream is the doll's dream and her physical form in the abandoned workshop is sleeping hence her finger moving. so flora gave the doll life in part to have a place to put gehrman and give hunters assistance when they dream

[panelshowsource]

random things to watch over the holiday break

happy holidays friends (⸝⸝^ᴗ^⸝⸝)❄️ as many of us have time off from our normal schedules, are taking long-haul flights or car drives, and will be spending hours in broom closets to avoid our terrifying families, i figure this is the perfect time to look back on the year and put together some watch links for over the break ❄️❄️❄️

—

panel shows

the christmas special of never mind the buzzcocks is always...something else

speaking of, icymi in a panel show miracle earlier this year an anonymous source provided beautiful archival copies of the first 12 series of nmtb — so this is the perfect time to revisit its classic era!!

junior taskmaster just wrapped up its first season! very wholesome, for the whole family (don't forget to check out the taskmaster podcast discussions for each episode, hosted by ed gamble!)

there were some great eps of cats does countdown this year but this one was probably my standout<3

because this series is on sky so we have to be careful circulating it, not everyone got a chance to watch rob beckett's smart tv when it aired this year! some of the panel guests include natasia demetriou, nicola coughlan, david tennant, romesh, and alan davies, among others

idk if this is controversial but i think the australian guy mont spelling bee MIGHT be better than the new zealand version... i'm not sure yet... i need someone else to watch every single episode and tell me what my opinion should be. i also want to thank this show for teaching me how to spell vinaigrette

this, this, and this were some of my favourite episodes of wilty this year!! btw the 2024 christmas episode just dropped!

there were a lot of wild lineups on mel giedoryc: unforgivable this year, but i'd recommend just starting with the first episode of the latest series because..well you'll understand when you see it

this year i made three big lists of random panel show moments that, in my humble opinion, you will love wasting your holidays hours clicking through: part 1 / part 2 / part 3

misc. tv

the royal variety performance 2024

the completely made up adventures of dick turpin was renewed for s2 so make sure to catch up!!! it's SO stupid hahaha

on a similar, less stupid note, ludwig will also be back for s2!

we're all still missing sean lock, who passed away three years ago, so it's never a bad time to revisit 15 storeys high — especially now that we have upgraded rips!

listen jon and lucy may be divorced but that doesn't make meet the richardsons any less iconic and the last two episodes just released!

s2 of alma's not normal is out this year and doing such amazing things for our sophie willan!!

this was a bit under the radar but backstage with katherine ryan was really fun! i love the mostly-documentary concept and it's one of my favourite things to see the backstage culture between these random comedians (judi x ivo killed me)

rhod gilbert's stand up to cancer documentary was really beautiful ;;

am i being unreasonable? (written by & starring daisy may cooper, from this country) is one of my underrated scripted comedies of the year

paddy mcguinness on who do you think you are

in the new jimmy carr-hosted game show battle in a box, pairs of celebs (mostly comedians) are trapped in an empty box for 24 hours, forced to play a series of mental and physical challenges. if you like the lineup then it's worth checking out!

it's christmas. just follow tradition and watch fry & laurie.

standup

ahir shah – ends (2024)

fern brady – austistic bikini queen (2024)

harriet kemsley – everything always works out for me (2024)

lucy beaumont – live from the royal court theatre (2024)

john kearns – the varnishing days (2023–4)

rhys james – spilt milk (2024)

suzi ruffell – snappy (2024)

tony law – the law also rises (2024)

films

monty python and the holy grail (1975) dir. terry gilliam, terry jones

withnail and i (1987) dir. bruce robinson

gosford park (2001) dir. robert altman

the personal history of david copperfield (2019) dir. armando iannucci

how to have sex (2023) dir. molly manning walker

rye lane (2023) dir. raine allen-miller

scrapper (2023) dir. charlotte regan

kneecap (2024) dir. rich peppiatt

youtube

been enjoying the dish podcast this year!! some of my favourite episodes include claudia winkleman, jordan north & william hanson, saoirse-monica jackson, gordon ramsay, sandi toksvig, richard e. grant, matthew macfadyen, and stephen fry

sandi toksvig hugging guests (2024 edition)

obsessed with this house tour with richard e grant

phil wang was on jolly?? it was fun to see his house

don't sleep on the taskmaster outtakes content!

radio & podcasts

green wing came back for a 6-part radio series and warmed all of our hearts<3

some of my favourite episodes of off menu this year: elis james, john robins, sam campbell, frankie boyle, lucy beaumont, jess knappett, joe wilkinson, tommy tiernan, ardal o'hanlon, huge davies (one of the all-time clips), danny dyer (this one is truly crazy on the ears can't recommend it enough)

the horne section podcast was back for a few episodes!!! if you've never listened before, start with this classic episode you're welcome

susie dent and phil wang have adorable chemistry on this new radio game show

david o'doherty and max rushden started a new podcast about what people did yesterday that has had lots of fun guests! start here if you need to give it a taste

a few RHLSTP episodes worth giving a listen: lee mack, bob mortimer, armando iannucci, rob brydon, peter serafinowicz, ade edmondson, fern brady, among others. if you find your patience waning, he's doing a couple of 'best of 2024' eps! richard's really been focused on his book podcast this year

books

frankie boyle & charlie skelton – a short history of the apocalypse: the vital guide to your future survival (2024)

miranda hart – i haven't been entirely honest with you (2024)

richard osman – we solve murders (2024)

—

i could go on forever but i've got to stop somewhere heh... looking forward to big fat quiz and more mindless telly in 2025! have a wonderful holiday x sarah

PANEL SHOW WATCH LINKS • NON-PANEL SHOW WATCH LINKS ♥ https://ko-fi.com/panelshowsource

[freakartack]

and who could forget dear ratboy

My popular opinion is that the koopalings are bowser's adopted children. My unpopular opinion is that they all aged up tiny kong style between the events of super mario world & new super mario bros wii and that bowser, suffering from empty-nest syndrome, wished for another baby turtle and soon got one courtesy of a very unfortunate stork. Junior's introduction to the koopalings was a little tense at first - particularly for Ludwig, whose unspoken assumption of succeeding the Koopa throne was immediately shattered - but once everyone got over themselves (including Ludwig, who never really wanted to rule anyway), Bowser Jr. was welcomed into the fold as yet another annoying baby brother.

Reasons bowser jr looks up to his siblings

Larry: knows all the shortcuts to wii games, helps him download secret cartoons without netflix

Morton: big teeth, physically impressive, nice to him

Wendy: highly aggressive demeanor to scare off potential adversaries

Iggy: scary as fuck, invents all types of crazy crap (inspired bowser jr to make the boss robots in super mario galaxies)

Roy: cool with the sunglasses, knows everything (i.e. if you ask him any question he will just make up an answer on the spot)

Lemmy: does not care at all what people think of him, gives good advice

Ludwig: "i don't know. he's kind of a nerd"

[supernova41st]

hiii ‼️‼️ I was wondering if you could do tf2 boys (any characters you want) with Mercy from overwatch reader 😭.

Heroes never die 🪽

Tf2 x Mercy!Reader

Scout/medic

A/n: SHES BAAAACK YUH YUHH BOOM SHACKALACKAAAAA YES GODDDD. Idk what else to say other than I hope y’all missed me!! Idk what my ‘schedule’ will be but just expect more posts in the future

Medic

Do I need to say anything? You don’t fw him at all. The differences are pretty clear, moral and sanity wise.

At first he was pretty interested to have another doctor on the team. But he quickly got jealous because the mercs took more of a liking to you than because of your gentleness.

“You’re with me doctor”

“Jou got it”

“Not you ya four-eyed twap! The angel”

“Oh, thank you ☺️”

Resurrecting heavy

“Doctor! We must try this resurrection thing!”

“You too???”

He hates you now, you’re not really fond of him either. Not only does he practice medicine with no license but his procedures are so inhumane compared to yours.

“Thank my medical professionalism, Ludwig.”

“Oo Klugscheißer, miss perfect!! Fuck you.”

He genuinely thinks you’re an Angel here to make his life more difficult cuz from what I heard he’s had his fair share of dealing with satan.

He’s interested in your work but will never EVER ask you about it because of his pettiness. Will try to recreate your resurrection skills however it looked less like a resurrection and more like dragging a zombie out of its grave.

When he showed it off to you you were terrified

“Now if we just grunt just help our little subject on his feet, he’ll be as good as new!”

“Celestial! Ludwig please put him out of his misery!!”

“Vhat? Nonsense, he’s fine!”

*he says as his his subjects body collapses

He got so thirsty for you when he saw you pistol whipping an enemy scout for him, it startled him so he thought it was hot

“Whew, careful out there Ludwig”

“…please, please take my heart. I vill have it taxidermied for you and everything!”

“What 🙁”

Now he’s become obsessed, pockets you every round and the team is not thrilled about that. It is fun to see you fly around landing headshots at the enemy team tho

Scout

This man had ZERO fucking idea you were even on the team until he began a mission with you. So when he was on the edge of dying and you flew over to lend a helping hand he frl thought god sent an angel to save him.

He didn’t even say anything he was just in shock like

‘😦..I’m the chosen one’

When he got back to the base everything felt so surreal to him, but then he immediately started bragging about it cuz it’s scout.

“Omgg do y’all have a guardian Angel? 🤭No? Fucking losers”

“Are you talking about y/n?”

“Who?”

“Hello”

“..oh”

He was so let down 😭 he had a genuine ‘I’m special’ moment there

You get so tired of him so fast. It’s always something with him, he’s like a little boy always getting injured and crying to his mom to pull out the first-aid kid

“Y/n, I lost a friggin’ tooth again”

“Seriously scout? This is the fifth one this week! Next time you’re going to medic for this.”

Free my boy, he didn’t do anything wrong 😞

Loves it when you resurrect him, makes him feel like a ‘newborn baby’

“Did it hurt?”

“Scout I’m busy I don’t have time for your pick up lines.”

‘:(‘

This bitch will do ANYTHING but stay still so you can heal him. It’s like he’s running away from you??

“🏥🏥🏥🏥🏥”

“SCOUT PLEASE GET DOWN HERE!!”

“THEYRE SHOOTING 🏥”

“YOU THINK THIS IS NEWS TO ME?”

Will try hopping on you when you’re flying, it didn’t go well.

“Are you gonna heal my legs now?”

“No! That’s on you for being stupid”

“When are you gonna give me a pair of those wings doc? I was born to fly 👽”

[angstyhikka]

(Translations are in image alt description)

Continue development of the Colliestrophy :3

His physical form is unstable, dangerous and very chaotic, as you can see. Limbs are twisted at unimaginable angles, joints seem to be missing at all or there are too many of them, facial features are distorted beyond recognition in seconds.

Colliestrophy, unlike Collie, is completely incapable of hiding and controlling his emotions. He is thrown from one extreme to another, one moment he is crying into three streams, and then he destroys everything around, and then he falls into hysterical fun and makes all the islands dance the Abba dance and maintain the appearance of fun, making sure that no one can sleep, so that there is daylight all day long, and so that everything in the area is so bright that it burns your eyes

There is a moment in the plot when Philip needed to hide Collie in a fragment of his old prison so that the boy would not die from the blood of the Titan. After which he mysteriously disappeared, hiding the glass in the hollow three. And so a month passes, and Philip still does not return. And Collie manages to wrap himself up in thoughts that his best and only friend, almost his brother, seems to have abandoned him, and he is left alone again. How else can you explain where Philip could have gone EXACTLY at the same hour when he sealed Collie and swore that they would run away from the Clathornes TOGETHER and hide?

And when Philip finally finds Collie, releases him and explains where he went and what he was doing, this only worsened the situation, and Collie, enraged and exhausted by languishing in the fragment, eventually turns into Colliestrophe.

In this state, he does not want to delve into his feelings. He's offended. He's in pain. And at the same time, he wants intimacy. Colliestrophe prefers to pretend that nothing happened. He maintains the illusion of their perfect life, until his confrontation with Hunter. Pretends everything is fine. He is doing everything to gain Philip’s favor now, and maybe he will allow him to merge with him. He is almost ready to do this against Philip's will. But he is afraid. Doesn't want to become a rapist. He understands that such a screw-up cannot be made up for by anything later. And so he only begs:

“I still want to try. Even if it hurts. I feel like if I don't get this from you, I'll just die. This all feels like the end of the world

- Collie, brother, this is not the end of the world, believe me. Life doesn't end when you get rejected. It's painful, but not fatal.

“Well, if it hurts anyway,” Colley sobs, “ThEeeeen...

And he buries his face in his elbow.

“But I don’t want,” almost in a whisper, which still thunders like a meteor shower, “for you to get hurt...”

In the end, everything will be resolved well, but it won’t be very soon, and who knows how much the heroes will suffer and what they will have to endure until Colliestrophe becomes just a Collie again.

(Dialogue was written by Ludwig aka LasyMit)

[milfstalin]

When I met Stalin, I did not find him enigmatic. I found him the easiest person to talk to I ever met. He is far and away the best committee chairman of my experience. He can bring everybody’s views out and combine them in the minimum of time. His method of running committees reminded me somewhat of Jane Addams of Hull House or Lillian D. Wald of Henry Street Settlement. They had the same kind of democratically efficient technique, but they used more high pressure than Stalin did.

If Stalin has been inaccessible to foreigners—there were exceptions even to this—that does not mean that he lived in isolation, in a sort of Kremlin ivory tower. There were close to 200,000,000 people keeping him busy. He was seeing a lot of them. Not always necessarily the party leaders. A milkmaid who had broken the milking record, a scientist who had broken the atom, an aviator who flew to America, a coal miner who invented a new labor process, a workman with a housing difficulty, an engineer balked by new conditions—any person representing either a signal achievement or a typical problem might be invited by Stalin to talk it over. That was the way he got his data and kept in touch with the movement of the country.

[...]

My first impression of him was vaguely disappointing. A stocky figure in a simple suit of khaki color, direct, unassuming, whose first concern was to know whether I understood Russian sufficiently to take part in discussion. Not very imposing for so great a man, I thought. Then we sat down rather casually, and Stalin was not even at the head of the table; Voroshilov was. Stalin took a place where he could see all our faces and started the talk by a pointed question to the man against whom I had complained. After that Stalin seemed to become a sort of background, against which other people’s comments went on. The brilliant wit of Kaganovich, the cheerful chuckle of Voroshilov, the characteristics of the lesser people called to consult, all suddenly stood out. I began to understand them all and like them; I even began to understand the editor against whom I had complained. Suddenly I myself was talking and getting my facts out faster and more clearly than I ever did in my life. People seemed to agree with me. Everything got to the point very fast and smoothly, with Stalin saying less than anyone.

Afterward in thinking it over I realized how Stalin’s genius for listening helped each of us express ourselves and understand the others. I recalled his trick of repeating a word of mine either with questioning intonation or a slight emphasis, which suddenly made me feel I had either not quite seen the point or perhaps had overstated it, and so drove me to make it plainer. I recalled how he had done this to others also. Then I understood that his listening has been a dynamic force.

This listening habit dates back to the early days of his revolutionary career. “I remember him very well from the early days of our Party,” said a veteran Bolshevik to me. “A quiet youth who sat at the edge of the committee, saying almost nothing, but listening very much. Toward the end he would make a few comments, sometimes merely as questions. Gradually we came to see that he always summed up best our joint thinking.” The description will be recognized by anyone who ever met Stalin. In any group he is usually last to express his opinion. He does not want to block the full expression of others, as he might easily do by speaking first. Besides this, he is always learning by listening.

“He listens even to the way the grass grows,” said a Soviet citizen to me.

On the data thus gathered, Stalin forms conclusions, not “alone in the night,” which Emil Ludwig said was Mussolini’s way, but in conference and discussion. Even in interviews, he seldom receives the interviewer alone; Molotov, Voroshilov, or Kaganovich are likely to be about. Probably he does not even grant an interview without discussing it first with his closest comrades. This is a habit he formed very early. In the days of the underground revolutionary movement, he grew accustomed to close teamwork with comrades who held each other’s lives in their hands. In order to survive, they must learn to agree quickly and unanimously, to feel each other’s instincts, to guess even at a distance each other’s brains. It was in such a group that he gained his Party name—it is not the one that he was born with—“the Steel One, Stalin.”

[...]

Stalin brings certain important qualities to these joint decisions. People who meet him are first of all impressed by his directness and simplicity, his swift approach. Next they notice his clearness and objectivity in handling questions. He completely lacks Hitler’s emotional hysteria and Mussolini’s cocky self-assertion; he does not thrust himself into the picture. Gradually one becomes aware of his keen analysis, his colossal knowledge, his grip of world politics, his willingness to face facts, and especially his long view, which fits the problem into history, judging not only its immediate factors, but its past and future too.

Stalin’s rise to power came rather slowly. The rise of his type is slow and sure. It began far back with his study of human history and especially the history of revolutions. President Roosevelt commented to me with surprise on Stalin’s knowledge of the Cromwellian Revolution in Britain as shown in his talk with H. G. Wells. But Stalin quite naturally studied both the British and the American historical revolutions far more intimately than British and American politicians do. Tsarist Russia was due for a revolution. Stalin intended to be in it and help give it form. He made himself a thorough scientist on the process of history from the Marxian viewpoint: how the masses of people live, how their industrial technique and social forms develop, how social classes arise and struggle, how they succeed. Stalin analyzed and compared all past revolutions. He wrote many books about them. But he is not only a scientist; he also acts.

In the early days of the Revolution, Stalin’s name was hardly known outside the Party. In 1923, during Lenin’s last illness, I was told by men whose judgment I trusted that Stalin was “our coming man.” They based this on his keen knowledge of political forces and his close attention to political organization as secretary of the Communist Party. They also based it on his accurate timing of swift action and said that thus far in the Revolution he hid not once guessed wrong. They said that he was the man to whom “responsible Party men” turned for the clearest statement of what they all thought., In those days Trotsky sneered at Stalin as the “most average man” in the Party. In a sense it was true. Stalin keeps close to the “average man”; the “average man” is the material of politics. But Stalin does it with a genius that is very far from average.

“The art of leadership,” said Stalin once, “is a serious matter. One must not lag behind the movement, because to do so is to become isolated from the masses. But one must not rush ahead, for this is to lose contact with the masses.” He was telling his comrades how to become leaders; he was also expressing his own ideal, which he has very effectively practiced.

[...]

Glimpses of Stalin’s personal relations come chiefly through his contacts with picturesque figures who have helped make Soviet history. Valery Chkalov, the brilliant aviator who made the first flight across the North Pole from Moscow to America, told of an afternoon that he spent at Stalin’s summer home from four o’clock till after midnight. Stalin sang many Volga songs, put on gramophone records for the younger people to dance, and generally behaved like a normal human being relaxing in the heart of his family. He said he had learned the songs in his Siberian exile when there wasn’t much to do but sing.

The three women aviators who broke all world records for women by their spectacular flight from Moscow to the Far East were later entertained at an evening party at the Kremlin in their honor. One of them, Raskova, related afterwards how Stalin had joked with them about the prehistoric days of the matriarchate when women ruled human society. He said that in the early days of human development women had created agriculture as a basis for society and progress, while men “only hunted and went to war.” After a reference to the long subsequent centuries of woman’s slavery, Stalin added, “Now these three women come to avenge the heavy centuries of woman’s suppression.”

[...]

“Comrades! Citizens!” he said, as he has said often. Then he added, “Brothers and Sisters!” It was the first time Stalin ever used in public those close family words. To everyone who heard them, those words meant that the situation was very serious, that they must now face the ultimate test together and that they must all be closer and dearer to each other than they had ever been before. It meant that Stalin wanted to put a supporting arm across their shoulders, giving them strength for the task they had to do. This task was nothing less than to accept in their own bodies the shock of the most hellish assault of history, to withstand it, to break it, and by breaking it save the world. They knew they had to do it, and Stalin knew they would.

Stalin made perfectly plain that the danger was grave, that the German armies had taken most of the Baltic states, that the struggle would be very costly, and that the issues were between “freedom or slavery, life or death to the Soviet State.” He told them: “The enemy is cruel and implacable. He is out to seize our lands, watered with our sweat . . . to convert our peoples into the slaves of German princes and barons.” He called upon the “daring initiative and intelligence that are inherent in our people,” which he himself for more than twenty years had helped to create. He outlined in some detail the bitter path they should follow, each in his own region, and said that they would find allies among the freedom-loving peoples of the world. Then he summoned them “forward—to victory.”

Erskine Caldwell, reporting that dawn from Moscow, said that tremendous crowds stood in the city squares listening to the loud speakers, “holding their breath in such profound silence that one could hear every inflection of Stalin’s voice.” Twice during the speech, even the sound of water being poured into a glass could be heard as Stalin stopped to drink. For several minutes after Stalin had finished the silence continued. Then a motherly-looking woman said, “He works so hard, I wonder when he finds time to sleep. I am worried about his health.”

That was the way that Stalin took the Soviet people into the test of war.

[coeur-de-fruk]

Cardverse: A Case Study (that really isn't one.)

Hello gaymers and happy new year! Today we will be revisiting an old official au called Cardverse. Keep in mind that this is going to be an entirely different version of it rather than canon Cardverse, and 90% of it will be just my sorry behind rambling about the wonders and glories of political relations and why IT SUCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LETS GO.

🔶Kingdom of Diamonds🔶

Ruler: Our Majesty Francis Bonnefoy, King/Queen of Diamonds; Beside him Prime Minister Erika Vogel and Royal Financial Advisor Vasch Zwingli (spelt his name wrong ik.)

The Kingdom of Diamonds; one of the wealthiest kingdoms in the land with a very turbulent history. Centuries ago, the king and queen upheld the most power (aside from Lords and Aristocrats). This imbalance of power would spark a revolt that would last for decades until a new form of government was put into place. (Not really.)

The Kingdom of Diamonds lies South, known for their very warm climates which contribute to their bountiful crops. They are responsible for 75% of the food distribution to other neighboring kingdoms. They are sometimes subsequently referred to as the "Brighter South" due to the amount of sunshine that contributes to their warm climate. However, they are often hindered by bad storms and monsoons from June until November.

While still under a monarchy, the Diamonds kingdom has it's own prime minister that keeps everything and everyone in check, this includes the king (or queen). Erika and Vasch act as some sort of caretaker for Francis, making sure that he's safe and not frivolously spending his inheritance on useless things such as new land, etc. Some have said that the King/Queen is too incompetent to be ruling a kingdom due to several factors: His emotional sensitivity, him being a people pleaser, and his overly flamboyant nature. Other has praised the king in his efforts in helping improve the lives of his people and his kind nature.

♠️The United Spades♠️

Ruler: Commander in Chief and President Alfred F. Jones; beside him Vice President Arthur Kirkland, and Secretary of State Chun-Yan Wang

From a small monarchy to one of the largest democracies in the land, The United Spades (actual name The United Spades of Aces) holds a lot of power than one may know.

They reside North, having to deal with several harsh winters. The Spades Kingdom has many various industrial sites. Unfortunately because of this, it is said to be the kingdom with the highest recorded rate of pollution.

The birth of the Spade's democracy still remains under debate by some historians. Some may have suggested it had ended after the death of the President's mother, who was said to be the last Queen of what once was the Kingdom of Spades. Others may have concluded that it emerged at the end of some sort of civil war; though these events had coincided with each other. Despite these events, the Spades are relatively young.

While he holds much authority over everyone, Alfred does struggle to keep many things in check; some praise him for his hard work while others criticize him for hurting some aspect of his community.

❤️The Kingdom of Hearts❤️

Ruler: Queen S̶͕̯̳͇̰͉̬̻̈́̃̿̈́͌̎͝ä̵̡̡͉̮̦̼̻̬̦̭́̄̓͝ḱ̸̛̜͉̀͑̆̊̈̚͠ų̵̠̤͚̥̻̀͗̋̌͋̇̌̏͋̍r̷͇̫̱̩̗̥̺̋̀͜͝a̵̢͕̯̙̓͐̔̓ ̶͇̜̯͍͍̥̩̟̹̣͗̀͛̔̍͑̈̕H̵̢͖͖͊͘ö̷̡̤̱̟̬̗̲́̆͂̾̇̊̚͠ń̶̢̧̠̓̂̚͜d̵̘͚̟̲̮͙͚̮͚̃́͛͋͒͐̄a̵̢͕͔̜̙͂̈́͌̅̈́͜ Lucrezia Vargas and King Ludwig Beilschmidt of the Hearts Kingdom.

The Hearts Kingdom resides in the western portion of the lands, also known as the "Western Kingdom" or "The Wild West". Much like the Empire of Clubs, they have a very fair climate. Average to the point where there is not much to comment on.

Not much is known about the Heart's Kingdom or what it's known for. It is rumored that the current queen isn't the real queen, and that something must've happened behind closed doors. Despite Ludwig being king and having the same amount of power, Lucrezia has the most authority over everybody. There is something about her that'll give you an aching feeling in your gut. But who is Sakura?

♣️The Empire of Clubs♣️

Ruler: Emperor Ivan Braginsky and Empress Elizabeta Hedevary and Jack of all trades Clubs Roderich Edelstein

The Empire of Clubs lies just to the east, majority of its territory landlocked by mountains and valleys. It's a place where not much goes on, not even among the monarchs who hold the power of the world within their hands. Some travelers from other kingdoms will return with how reserved most of the people are, giving them this quiet reputation.

Although quiet, they are well known for their clean environment and vast green valleys. Because of this they have a very diverse ecosystem and dedicate their fundings to preserving the homes of many species whether by land or by sea. It is even rumored that Ivan has a giant pet polar that was stolen from a neighboring kingdom elsewhere. Although due to the privacy of the royals, this cannot be confirmed nor denied.

[darkbluekies]

Looking at Ludwig and how he reacted thinking that everyone hated him (instead of the little sister) I feel like it isn’t hatred but instead fear, she has her husband, the same person who put her through everything, but now a copy of that completely acting and behaving like him too, it’s fear that makes her scared and look like hatred I feel like darling wants to love her son but past memories and faults and un lying truths has just made darling paranoid which results in only trusting Emund which resulted it being harder to trust others when he only has been spraying blood everywhere

I think darling tries, but can’t because of fear and dread of everything happing again, darling wants to love him, but oh so can’t

Yes, it is! Darling thinks about it multiple times in the story, that Ludwig scares her and it's connected to his extreme similarity with his father.

In the story, Ludwig pulls darlings hand so tightly that he hurts it (not badly, just bruising it maybe) and when edmund asks her if she's hurt, she replies "no" while clutching her hand. Why? Because Ludwig is still her son and the guilt that she feels fear for him makes her feel like a bad mother. Replying no, and saving Ludwig that punishment and rage (which we are familiar with when someone hurt darling) is her way of showing that she's sorry for how she feels about him. She basically saves him from a ruthless punishment. Because she does still care, at least deep down.

It's more detailed in a story that was supposed to come out before "here we go again" (actually last spring LMAO) but it was never done. I can show you some sentences that show that she does love Ludwig, but she's terrified of him and feels such guilt for being that.

Trusting Edmund has basically become her only choice, because she knows that Ludwig listens to him and he would protect her if anything would happen. It's the best choice in a horrible situation.

Thank you for your analysis, I love reading these types of posts and being able to add onto it!!

[hwsing]

nsfw alphabet for germany and/or prussia? thank you!!!!

germany nsfw alphabet

notes: 18+, reader is gender neutral and i don’t think genitalia is really mentioned. includes: germany (ludwig). as always, reblogs are appreciated!

cws: mostly top + dom! ludwig; cockwarming, power dynamics, restraints/bondage, piss kink, pet play, size difference, toys, overstim + edging, pet play. let me know if i forgot any through replies, anon or PMs. wc: about 2k words. not really proof read.

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

king of overthinking so trust that he’s likely to go above and beyond, especially at first. it’s also partially because he’s pretty deep in kink culture, but not quite porn dead brained; instead, he’s like… really conscious of being mindful. he’s not really the type for pillow talk and he can get pretty flustered after sex, so he’s gonna busy himself with getting you what you need.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

for him, it’s probably his overall physique since we all know this madlad works out like the world is about to request him to singlehandedly carry it on his shoulders. as much as he can be self critical, he’s pretty proud of himself!! he likes the confidence he can have in his strength and health and all that good stuff.

on his partner’s, he’d probably say something like their smile in an almost bashful way, but in reality it’s going to be their chest/hips/thighs/butt; whichever catches his attention the most, really. he just feels a bit bad that he’s that perverted, but you’ll know by how much he pays attention to that spot. i think he’s a boob guy (regardless of size/gender) though

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

ludwig is nasty in a way that should be studied. for someone who is so neat, he is very messy with cum — *both* yours and his. the type to kiss you after you swallow his cum, to stuff his fingers into whatever hole he creamed into to ensure it doesn’t leak, make you suck his fingers after getting you off with his hand. he likes to cum in you, but he does like how demeaning it is to cum on your body

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

what isn’t a dirty secret of his would be easier to answer… everything is a dirty secret to him. he’s a private person, okay! god forbid you somehow find his private tab. regardless of if you’ve been dating for years or a short time, he’s so embarrassed that he’ll go red.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

he’s not super experienced because 1. he has little to no game, ESPECIALLY with feminine presenting people and 2. he’s always been pretty busy. by modern day and age he’s by no means a virgin, though. he’s gotten around enough — but he still is pretty awkward and tense at first. knows what he’s doing, but can find it hard to actually go through with it is all. give him a second to hype himself up!

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

anon stop it you’re embarrassing him with these questions :( LOL no but he’s pretty versatile, probably likes positions you’ve never even heard of but … maybe the seashell is his favourite. overall, likes positions where he can more or less go to town and put some weight on you, because even when bondage isn’t involved he’s inclined to pin you down.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

please do not make a joke while his dick and balls are out they’ll literally shiver up inside him and never come out again

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

when he has a partner he’s extremely well groomed. shaves by default but if his partner makes it known they like some bush he’ll grow some out

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

intimacy is something ludwig struggles with a bit. he worries he’s too awkward and just butchers it, completely ruining the mood; still, he definitely tries, especially when things are still just starting. he’s not very smooth with sweet words, and he knows he isn’t either. so, this intimacy is going to come from what he’s doing — the way his strong hands carefully hold you, how his lips kiss up your leg while he undresses you, the feeling of him holding your hands tightly while fucking you.

he does find cockwarming to be extremely intimate. ludwig does like it quite a bit; he’s not easily overstimulated either so he can handle it for a good period of time as well. he likes to big spoon for peak intimacy… holding you makes his heart almost give out

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

this isn’t terribly uncommon for ludwig. his sex drive is high, and he doesn’t get game often. he will use his own imagination, but only under the condition that something is inspiring him; for example, his crush or partner. otherwise, he has plenty of porn saved.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

we would be here all day if i said all of them. so lets just unpack a few

power dynamics: he kind of needs a sub/dom dynamic in the bedroom. he greatly prefers being the dom, but he can find it a bit hard to bring himself to actually act on his desires. and so, he really, really likes when you play up the submissive thing; the more pathetic you are, the more he’s gonna feel the urge to make you a mess. his mess though! he’s likely to manhandle you since he’s… probably stronger than you.

restraints: he’s not super picky with this one because as long as you’re at his mercy he’s satisfied but, he REALLY likes bondage benches. loves them actually. be warned because he’s gonna go to pound town with this one

piss kink: very into humiliation and he’s not above purposely making you piss yourself. the more embarrassed you are, the better, really; he’d entertain the idea of pissing on or in you as a punishment. would understand if you are not into this though because he is self aware enough to know it’s nasty

pet play: feel like this one is a given but anyways, he does like the kitty thing but he especially likes the puppy side so he can train and discipline you.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

anywhere around his or your house/apartment. “risky” sex would spike his anxiety in ways that should not be apart his foreplay… overall prefers a bed but he’s not above fucking you bent over the counter or smushed up against the wallz

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

unfortunately for him, just about anything. he’s horribly down bad. the lingering scent of your perfume/cologne/etc after you leave is enough for him to get him stiff.

i would say his biggest turn on’s though are; times when your size difference (if there is one) is prominent, when you’re struggling physically with something (the small groans/moans/whimpers… his mind travels FAST), and if you wear makeup. he likes the idea of ruining it

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

this is hard because i struggle to imagine him having a big no other than, like, surprises/not respecting boundaries and things of that nature. he’s pretty open minded because he of all people has no room to judge…!

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

here

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

prefers fast and rough for obvious reasons.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

does not like quickies. ludwig can see the appeal but… he’s only going to do it if he gets caught up in the moment enough to. not a common thing to expect from him

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

now you already know. he’s pretty open minded. the main times he’d be hesitant would be if the idea includes him bottoming or subbing, but he’s usually still down to at least try once

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

he generally lasts a decent amount of time, but the first few times he sleeps with his partner he tends to take forever to cum because he gets SO nervous he cannot let himself. he prefers 2-3 rounds generally, but he does draw them out as much as he can. generally, he makes you cum at least twice before he does at all.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

he’s easily one of the most into toys out of the cast in my opinion. he doesn’t like them on himself as much as he likes using them on you. he does have a handful, but will expand the collection with his own money if he discovers more online or his partner shows interest in a new one. i wrote a bit about this here

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

him being a sadist is well known i think 😭 he’s nervous to do it at first, as he is with everything, but once he feels comfortable prepare yourself because this man will not be your peace in the bedroom. whether it’s edging or overstim, making you get off on his boot or thigh, keeping you restrained with one of those fuck machines… he’s awfully creative.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

ludwig isn’t very loud and isn’t very talkative. unless he’s in enough of a headspace to degrade you anyways……. he groans quite a bit when he gets close but he’s not much of a screamer. even when he does talk during sex, it’s pretty much to the point and without many filler words. he does check in pretty often though, just to see how you’re doing.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

gets a lot of dom drops/post nut clarity after particularly intense sessions but he’s very reluctant to share this. he just feels embarrassed/ashamed about reaching out for reassurance or comfort. it’s pretty easy to tell when he’s feeling like this though, he’ll be extremely quiet and have a tense look on his face while he goes extra with your aftercare while completely neglecting himself

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

now rarely do i give a man the credit of being well endowed but… i have to say that he is. i simply cannot picture him without a massive dick. i personally would guess around 8”, thick AND veiny; most certainly struggled to know what to do with it at first but he discovered the power of it soon enough!! actually kind of shy about it because he’s had a notable amount of experiences with a partner being iffy about how big he was. lmao

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

clearly pretty high. he’s also pretty well disciplined though, so it’s not enough to like.. take over his life or anything. ends up sexually frustrated often because of this… he has a poor habit of ignoring his needs

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

ludwig doesn’t usually fall asleep after sex unless it’s like just before his usual bed time. and even then, he probably will fall asleep after you since he’s busying himself with aftercare and whatnot. sleeps the best after getting to empty his balls once or twice though!

[gallusrostromegalus]

all the captains and lieutenants accidentally get slipped some of ukitake's fucked up gigaweed edibles, what happens

First of all, it's not an accident, they straight-up plan a Friday-Night-Of-A-Three-Day-Weekend event of this. Everyone is curious, and Ukitake thinks it will be a funny way to celebrate his Birthday. He is correct: Yamamoto: Veteran of The Dank Arts, gets real high but not unpleasantly so. Would do it again next time he has a long weekend to enjoy it!

Sasakibe: Claims Ludwig Wittgenstein makes PERFECT sense now, attempts to write this philosophical revelation down but is thwarted by the jammed machinations of a clicky pen.

Soi Fon: Gives herself a hernia laughing at one (1) bad pun.

Yoruichi: Used to Urahara's Megaweed Edibles, so approaches the Gigaweed with undue confidence, declares This Edible Ain't Shit five minutes in and eats a second one. She has to be coaxed down from the top of the fridge where she's hiding from The Hatmen by bribing her with a can of Tuna. (Ukitake keeps the $21-a-can Good Shit in the house)

Omaeda: Creates a God-teir marinara Sauce, AND has the good sense to have Nemu pause her Game of Go and come into the kitchen to write down what he did.

Rose: Writes a magnificent new symphony, it's his best work ever, it's life alteringly beautiful, it's effervescent- When he sobers up, it's half a piccolo solo that barely qualifies as a ringtone.

Izuru: In the kitchen crying while eating an inadvisable amount of Omaeda's Spaghetti Marinara.

Retsu: Category Five Mukbang Incident

Isane: Thinks she's filming the Mukbang Incident, actually has her phone open to the calculator app.

Shinji: refuses to touch the Gigaweed because he "Owes The Hatmen Money" and nobody can tell if he's joking or not (he's not).

Momo: Literally Everything is HILARIOUS

Hiyori: Did not know it was possible to have a bigger, gayer crush on Momo, but she somehow opened up a new level of lesbianics. She calls it Gay 2.

Byakuya: Couchlocked for 24 hours straight.

Renji: Couchlocked right there with him, but able to text Izuru to bring them Spaghetti.

Komamura: Can't. Canine Weed Toxicity. (Relieved, offers to spend the weekend watching Toshiro and Yachiru so he has an excuse to go winter camping over the weekend)

Iba: Got High as FUCK. Found out later that the thing he actually ate was a Little Debbie Cosmic Brownie.

Shunsui: his alcohol tolerance actually makes his weed tolerance terrible so he's on the floor from jokingly licking the wrapper.

Nanao: Challenging people to knife fights (Romantic Intent).

Tousen: Immediately passes out because he managed to get his blood pressure down to normal levels, sleeps for 26 hours straight and wakes up feeling genuinely well-rested and in a good mood for the first time in two centuries.

Kensei: Gets his hand bitten at the Category 5 Mukbang Incident because he thought it would be funny to try to snitch off Retsu's plate.

Shuuhei: Attempting to refinance Shinji's debt with The Hatmen. Possibly succeeding?

Mashiro: Said "This Edible Ain't Shit", took a second, and appears to be unaffected. Playing Go with Nemu and winning.

Matsumoto: Makes the Hernia-inducing Pun. Will not STOP making Puns.

Hitsugaya: Being babysat by Komamura, would be madder about this if he wasn't also having a blast doing wintertime camping.

Kenpachi: Attempts to fight his own shadow, loses.

Yachiru: Also on the Wintertime Mountain Expedition, trying to talk Toshiro into joining her and Komamura on an Elk Hunt.

Ikkaku: Has done weed before, but only smoked it, but has a naturally suspicious nature and waits to see how Yoruichi does on her second edible, and avoids running afoul of The Hatmen.

Yumichika: Stays sober to collect blackmail on everyone. Actually films the Mukbang Incident for Isane

Mayuri: This is NOTHING compared to the Quantum Formaldymeth shit he's been on for the last century.

Urahara: from a prominent weed-growing family and lifetime connoisseur of The Herb. Takes one bite and realizes he's in deep shit, lies down on the floor next to Shuuhei and gives him terrible financial advice.

Nemu: Not chemically effected by The Edible but she loves A Group Social Activity so she's a little crunk on Social Recognition Euphoria and it's interfering with her game.

Ukitake, peeling his lieutenant off the floor: Y'all are wimps.

Rukia: has to be peeled off the floor, is affectionately dumped in the laps of Renji and Byakuya, where she forces them to have an emotionally honest and borderline normal conversation.

[gremlins-hotel]

Do you have any gerame/ameger thoughts you’d like to share? 🎤🎤🎤

It’s a solid rizz ‘em with the ‘tism from both sides. They’re both nerds. Engineers but different flavors. Two archaeologists if you’re like me and so inclined. Special interests galore. You can distract two birds with one Wikipedia rabbit hole stone. Just give them the page for concrete and it’s going to be the most focused you see either of them. They will attempt to engineer their way out of many things, sometimes literally.

Ludwig is also the hood to the falcon that is Alfred; he has the steadfast nature to keep that dreamer from flying away, or merely too high. But falcons are strong, able to bear things much heavier than they into the air. Alfred has that easy personable confidence that can drag Ludwig out of the house and out of the shell. I’d like to think there’s some admiration on both sides. “How does he make interaction look so easy?” vs. “How does that guy manage to stay so focused?” Despite Alfred being older, y’know, it’s Lud that’s got the itinerary for everything while the other tries to get him to be loose and wing it. They can balance each other. It helps that they’re both young yet still and contain a lot of energy.

Also autism be damned but both of my boys can GRILL. Maybe this is just me bringing my own Texas history and heritage into it, but we find that many barbecue techniques here stem from our history of German immigrants and settlement (though of course that’s not the only source). Lud and Al are also just peak dad fashion couple, I fear. Give them both a lawnmower and the white Reeboks, your grass will be cut in no time.

[bunji-enthusiast]

Just so yall know I’m cooking up the sequel *rubs hands together menacingly*

Being a former employee for Playtime Co. is one thing to say, but being an engineer was a different process. You were only involved in the works of designing and constructing, not once had you ever really got hand in hand with actually building things. But you were highly proud of the work you had done and completed alongside your fellow co-workers, looking back on it now… all it does simply saddens you.

How it seemed to be the way that the toys seemed to be so lifeless, once so full of joy, love and empathy for everyone in this place all together.

You wouldn’t mind turning back the clock and doing good for once more, the right way this time. When everything was said and done, the toys you came across were well justified in their anger for being abandoned–but you weren’t looking to be on the top list of being killed either. Considering how you had gotten lucky apparently by quitting the day before your co-workers had all disappeared.

Getting through this place was no trouble, you remember some good places of this Factory like the back of your hand. Huggy Wuggy, Kissy Missy of whom is his spouse was rather different to the likes of the tall-blue furred beast. Rather inconceivable in behaviors, Kissy Missy was a perturbed ally, one you didn’t expect. All the toys you met so far, (save for Poppy, and Kissy Missy) had full intentions to kill you from going any further.

This Factory is a whole goddamn amalgamation of mysteries you weren’t sure you wanted to solve anymore. Let alone having any trust in every being you come across now too, how disturbing must this get? You sure as hell weren’t Elliot Ludwig.

[popfizzles]

You said smith x val/sloth was one of your favorite parings with her, what are your other favorite val/sloth parings?

I pair Val with lots of others :)

Val and Smith is the recent favorite, I like the country boy/city girl vibes. They're more alike than they seem, both constantly working so hard and putting others first. Plus, I like Smith, who will readily flirt and make jokes, but crumbles at any showing of genuine reciprocated feelings. Val gives gifts and compliments and Smith just. DOESN'T know what to do about it???

I like Val paired with either of the cup brothers too.

Val with Cuphead is cute! High-school sweethearts who caused trouble together (and continue to cause trouble).

Val and Mugman is cute too, Mugman puts himself in a caretaker role in relationships, and Val gets pampered (something she desperately craves and deserves). Plus, it's slightly scandalous to me >:) Cuphead is Val’s best friend, and Mugman is his twin brother. That's spicy.

I also pair Val and Boba!! Roommates, childhood friends, they know each other better than they know themselves. Plus, Boba is more passive than the others that I normally put Val with, so Val gets to show off a more dominant side. 😌

There are a few others here and there, I think Val and Chalice is a fan favorite, Val and Mac is sooo cute, Val and Ludwig is something I wish I drew more of, Val and Gelati is a new one but just as good..

Val goes nicely with lots of others. I've said it before a few times, it's the lovecore vibes and heart motifs. She just fits perfectly next to anyone 🥰

×××

Sloth is a bit of a different story.

They're a tragedy, all of the sins are, and I try to make that clear.

I think ultimately the end goal for sins (out of their control or not) is to tempt others so deeply with something that people are willing to give up their souls to continue living the life the sins are teasing them with.

So, for instance, Sloth would show Smith how nice it can be to sleep in, to not have to work so hard, how nice it is to not have to worry about things. And Smith would be strung along and eventually be willing to give up more and more things to keep feeling that way. His friends, his job, his brother and sister, his soul.

And I don't think it's really something that the sins actively attempt to achieve or do on purpose. If that makes sense? Like I think everything Sloth does with Smith would be 100% genuine! She does want to relax with him and share drinks and laze around, because she likes him.

But it goes so fast from "just a small break" to Smith going missing for days. No one can get ahold of him, the farm is starting to die, Mac is struggling to get Goldie to and from school. Things are falling apart.

But Smith is finally relaxing.

He's ignoring his responsibilities, and he can't find it in himself to care about the consequences, because it feels too damn good.

And that's just a result of Sloth's nature.

[freakartack]

"I am pretty clever, aren't I? And a good dancer, too." -The quote that was on top of his super mario wiki article for like ten years until they replaced it with something not from a coloring book

Iggy Koopa is a master of machinery but (and?) he is also a complete freakazoid. Praised as "the brainy kid" during his childhood - no doubt to to Ludwig's chagrin - Iggy once upon a time supplied his King Dad with a smorgasbord of Inventions, such as the cloning machine GLOM (my favorite), everything in Yoshi's Safari, and the one that makes you freaky friday switch with a random person (self explanatory). These days, though, his "inventions" are limited to insane rube goldberg machines that do nothing, attempts to break reality as we know it, or dumb pranks. Iggy is completely maniacal and does not give a shit what people think of him; he also considers himself a genius but unlike Ludwig he kind of is. Extremely close with lemmy and loves to show off his instruments of chaos to his easily impressed brother (ironic because when they were younger iggy was the one easily impressed by him). Beyond that though Iggy and Lemmy both deeply admire each other's unflappable strangeness in their own way, and also love causing trouble with each other. Iggy has an affinity for chain chomps and has his own pet chain chomp aptly named Chompy, and he also loves the jungle which is why he made his head into a tree. Oh, and he also has a violent phobia of yoshis as of super mario world because when bowser put him on Yoshi's Island he was scared of the yoshis so he isolated himself on a floating rock and crouched there until@mario came and pushed him off the rock.