#Just clueless

[vilkm]

My Dad, proudly: i know my son very well :D

Me knowing full well he knows very little about his daughter:

[bi-mccall]

rewatching teen wolf 1.01: wolf moon

[drpoisonoaky]

yesterday was asexual awareness day, but i forgo, so i wanted to share with the class the best response i’ve received when i told someone i was ace:

“Why? You’re pretty.”

[illusioncanthurtme]

Ai bootlickers need to go back to preschool, or kindergarten, and they need to be handed some construction paper, and some elmer's glue, and some fucking crayons, and figure out what it feels like to fucking make something. I'm so sick and tired of hearing from people who have no clue what it means, or what it feels like, to be creative.

[angelgigisworld]

[jaybirbie]

DP x DC Prompt.

Deadserious

.

>Danny had a problem. He thought he handled it well. He couldn't tell his civillian boyfriend of his half-dead status.

He definitely couldn't let him find out by being summoned by some culty wannabes who wanted to rule the world.

Easy solution: Volunteer to be the sacrifice, turn his eyes green, and act like a Royal prick and powerful being. Get rescued by one of Gothams 50 vigilantes. And claim no memory.

Boom, secret identity underwraps.

He didn't expect everyone to treat him so fragile after.

>

Damian also had a problem. That problem, being his civilian boyfriend, was obviously possessed by a spirit of the ghastly ghost king and was utterly clueless about it.

And it was all his fault.

Danny Fenton was the next June Moore/ Enchantress. Except he was hosting one of the most powerful beings in the universe.

And that lovable idiot had no damn idea about it.

[dubiousculturalartifact]

do you ever think about how darcy's perspective of the visit to rosings is just... a completely wild time. so like. he and his favourite cousin goes to visit with his weird aunt, and ends up running into this hot girl, that he's really kinda increasingly into? she's staying in the area for a while with her bestie. so like. he was expecting a boring social obligation visit & getting pressure into marrying his other, less favourite cousin. instead, he watches the hot girl hold her own with his aunt in conversation. she banters with him over the pianoforte and they have a Moment™. he keeps going over to the house she's staying at, just to awkwardly chill there, even though he doesn't like the other people there. has a whole conversation with her about how she wouldn't mind living far away from family, as long as she could afford the travel. he extends his visit so he can keep seeing her. when he runs into her on a walk, she makes a point of detailing the exact route she prefers to take while out walking, clearly encouraging him to join her, so he does. he has a really nice time on these walks, they spend a lot of time in companionable silence, but he manages to flirt a little by implying some stuff about the future & what their married life could be like, and they have some conversations about that. and sure, she has some family baggage, but none of them are around so it's a lot easier to ignore, y'know? so eventually he just can't take it anymore, and he shoots his shot. she clearly values honesty so he explains his scruples as well, but he thinks she's been dropping some favourable signals, so he's got a good chance, right?

and then not only she turns him down she ROASTS THE FUCK OUT OF HIM. she insults him. she insults his honour as a gentleman. she flips the fuck out about... oh yeah crap the sister thing, turns out his cousin blabbed, and then I'M SORRY YOU SAID WHAT? ABOUT WICKHAM? THIS IS ABOUT FUCKING WICKHAM, MY FUCKING NEMESIS? HE FUCKING SAID WHAT ABOUT.... OH MY GOD. oh fuck. I've fucked up so badly I need to reevaluate my entire life & risk sending a letter to an unmarried woman who hates my guts, just so i can explain shit. fuck.

[tubbytarchia]

I told you I never stop thinking about merpearl

[cringefail-clown]

post-canon/epilogues au, in which kankri, through paradox space shenanigans, gets revived and comes into his ultimate self, gathering knowledge from all of his past and future iterations - including the signless. now hes on a one-man mission to stop ult dirks plan to start another session of sburb in the bud

[kizzer55555]

The Vampire Aesthetic

Ok so Danny knows two billionaires personally and they really couldn’t be more different. Yet they had one thing in common. A vampire aesthetic. Sam is fully into goth. Spiderwebs, bats, the color black. She enjoys fangs and fake blood and the darkness of her soul. Meanwhile, Vlad is Vlad. If his name wasn’t enough, the dark clothing, pale skin, and flying around with a cape and fangs with coffins in his mansion really sells it.

Danny doesn’t know many rich people so he thinks this might be some kind of trend. (If Paulina is rich, her family likes the chupacabra) So he just thinks that all rich people have some kind of vampire thing going on.

Cue Danny somehow ending in the Wayne household. Maybe he was brought over as a friend of one of the bats, maybe rescued from a field trip/vacation gone wrong, maybe some other situation. But he is there in civilian form with civilian Waynes and Danny just takes a good long look around the inside of the mansion.

“So where’s the vampire aesthetic?

Everyone freezes.

Danny just starts looking around, checking behind paintings and feeling the walls for secret levers. Used to secret passages with Vlad and possibly Sam. The Fentons definitely had them when they were temporarily rich.

“Come on, I know you guys are hiding it.”

Cue the entire batfamily thinking that this is another Tim and that he is fully aware that these people are the batfamily. Danny hangs around the mansion more and the bats just start dropping their disguises and not even bothering to hide stuff around Danny because they assume he already knows. (Possibly even trying to recruit him to be a new bat) Meanwhile, Danny, who does not know these people are batman and his birds, just does not pick up on any of it.

He grew up in a health violation with a giant ballon observatory lab above his head and a portal to the afterlife in his basement. He is a half dead teenager who has tea with the god of time and his godfather is the other parent to his clone child. He’s used to death lazers being scattered across his home and mysterious stains on clothing.

People are weird! He doesn’t judge!

[rheakira]

Based on a conversation I had with a friend.

[jubileepizza]

The absolute crime that was Jack Harkness being a total enthusiastically knowledgable technology geek being written out of his character for torchwood. You wanna write a sex icon without his most attractive quality?? Come on now. Give the man his passion back.

[a-most-beloved-fool]

tos jim kirk is very funny to me because he is so bad with children. you'd think he'd be good with them, but he isn't. i think he probably likes them well enough, he just. doesn't know how to talk to them. not one bit. has no idea how to interact. kids can tell he's trying, but he's bad enough at it that they don't really like him more for it. type of guy who you'd hand a baby to, and he'd hold it out in front of him with stiff arms. like, um. what do i do with this. he could be coached on proper holding technique, but he'd still look visibly uncomfortable the whole time.

tos spock is Not Much Better. i think that he feels more clueless around kids than kirk does, but kids also like him more. he doesn't have it in him to be mean to a child ever, so all the awkward kids adore him, and he spends the whole time with them sending desperate looks to other crew members, being like, 'help, i am ill equipped for childcare' and everyone around him is like, 'nooo, you're doing great!!!' while the child has a blast and he is wishing desperately to be Anywhere Else. however, he does refuse care of babies. somehow, he is even worse with babies than jim is.

bones, though - he's a kid guy. he loves kids and babies. he adores them, they adore him, it's a win win. and he looks over at kirk and spock Struggling and he laughs and laughs and laughs. (the kids, of course, think this is hilarious, and they join in on making fun of kirk and spock, even if they don't really know what they're making fun of them for.)

[wondersinwaynemanor]

one time when Damian was injured during patrol, he snuck into Dick's apartment but his older brother wasn't around because he had a double shift. so he took care of his own injuries and made his own hot cocoa.

while he was sipping on the hot drink, Damian was wandering around the apartment and saw the tape of the movie, Clueless, on the coffee table. he ended up watching it until he was capable to come back home, as the rest of the tapes were taken by Jason.

---

a day at the Manor:

Steph: I think that formula is not right, Dami.

Jason: That lacks more carbon.

Duke: Oxygen perhaps.

Dick: It lacks more than that.

Cass: I'll ask Bruce what we lack.

Damian: I'm right, okay? Why don't you put your trust in me?

Dick: Hey, it's not that we don't trust you. We just want this formula to be as accurate as possible.

Cass: No failures allowed, Dami.

Damian: You know what...

Damian, uses both of his hands to form a W: Whatever.

Steph: Uh???

Cass raises her brows.

Duke: Um....

Jason: The fuck did the brat just do?

Dick: Oh no....

---

Tim: Damian, I swear, I'm not letting you borrow my laptop ever again. Your cat just shit on it!

Damain: It would be wise to investigate your devices before handing them to me. Maybe it smelled like human waste before you handed it to me.

Tim: What are you implying?

Damian only shrugs.

Tim: You know what? I'm not helping you convince B that you need another pet.

Damian: You said you'd help me after I helped you on that Physics project you had for your university.

Tim: I change my mind. You're a brat.

Damian: And you're a virgin who can't drive.

Tim: WHAT THE FU---

[elians-terrarium]

hi hello I have been moved to an open air enclosure where I can interact with the world

[lazylittledragon]

hey idk which anxious pre-t babe needs to hear this but i didn't get to when i was younger so. testosterone will not make you ugly. it won't make you a horrible person. it won't 'mutilate' or ruin your body. if you want to go on testosterone then literally all that happens is it makes you really fucking hot and REALLY fucking happy.