#Im so embarrassed sometimes

[baconcolacan]

Any aus that you're interested in? I would love to see something like police officer/criminal from your hands, whether it be a drawing or a fic

Also, (Regimen) Tord sometimes feels like his only purpose is Tom and all, but does he care about Pat and Paul? Equally as much? If so, Were Tom to hurt one of them (physically) what would Tord do?And would his treatment change, if Toms actions were reasonable (idk like self-defense) or not?

Does regimen Tord still hate "sunshine lollipops?" What would his reaction be were Tom to somehow hack the base's system and have it blasting throughout the whole base/army?

If Tord were to, lets say kiss Tom (in the state he's in now, hospitalized, unstable, and all that) what would toms course of action be?

And lastly, if toms team (the ones he departed from in his capture while being given to the red army) if his men could tell him something before he left, what would each one say? (Including matt)

Also i sincerely hope that you'll be able to take a break with all the work and ur siblings, i honestly admire how u can do all of these things at the same time, you give me strength! Sorry for asking so much, if you want you can respond to all the answers individually/on different posts since its so many!

Whew~! Had to grab my coffee before I answered this one buddy! And don't worry! I'd be happy to answer this in one go, never apologize for asking about my current brainrot no matter the length :3c Warning long post below

Any aus that you're interested in? I would love to see something like police officer/criminal from your hands, whether it be a drawing or a fic

By this you mean AUs that I might want to create myself? Well, at the moment I'm very attached to all the current AUs I have. That being Stay and Military Dads (Regimen if you count it as one, though its canon divergence, but technically thats also AU???). But if you means AUs outside of me, I really like the Frankenneighbors/Stitched Up AU by lunareclipse06, years before this one was Crisis AU by sleepyeule but don't bother them about that, Eule left the fandom long ago. Officer/Criminal hm? Weeelll, I'll think about it.

Also, (Regimen) Tord sometimes feels like his only purpose is Tom and all, but does he care about Pat and Paul? Equally as much? If so, Were Tom to hurt one of them (physically) what would Tord do?And would his treatment change, if Toms actions were reasonable (idk like self-defense) or not?

I wouldn't say he cares about them as equally as he does Tom, if they were all drowning and he could only save two, he'd save Tom twice. Still, he does care about Pat and Paul a lot more than most people, they're friends in some capacity and he has fought with and defended them before. He trusts them, and thats saying a lot for this version of Tord, being that he's so paranoid of everyone around him. If Tom were to hurt them, and he has (see: Pat's nose), he'd probably just sigh and chide at whoever got hurt 'I've already warned you before: Thomas is not to be underestimated.' But he would also probably punish Tom, just a bit of a light smack is all. Generally though, Tord thinks his verbal warning about Tom was sufficient enough, and if people still got hurt knowing Tom can and will hurt them, he'll just think they're stupid for taking it lightly. He'll be very disappointed in Paul or Patryck if they continue getting bodied by Tom though.

Does regimen Tord still hate "sunshine lollipops?" What would his reaction be were Tom to somehow hack the base's system and have it blasting throughout the whole base/army?

Yes he still very much hates it, and for everyone's sake lets hope Tom doesn't do that because it will result in the loss of a significant amount of lives, though knowing Tom he'd do it either way given his whole mental instability thing. But Tord is also mentally unstable, so after the initial damage has been done, Tom is most likely going to suffer something really bad.

If Tord were to, lets say kiss Tom (in the state he's in now, hospitalized, unstable, and all that) what would toms course of action be?

Canon-wise in my fic, Tord would never initiate, but sure I can answer this what-if. Atm, Tom is very very vulnerable, his body is all broken up and mentally, he's not doing well. He'd most likely just let the kiss play out, but he'd probably try to bite Tord if it goes on too long.

And lastly, if toms team (the ones he departed from in his capture while being given to the red army) if his men could tell him something before he left, what would each one say? (Including matt)

Aw you cheeky bastard you :]c Are you looking for unofficial-official closure for this scenario I wrote? You've got a lot of gumption coming to the actual author of the fic for this, as I never ever intended for them to have proper closure, as that's just how it is sometimes, we don't always get to move forward in life with everything tied up nicely. But for you, because you've been so sweet, alright. Here you go, an unofficial-official scene for Regimen:

The snow was too thick to walk through, reaching up to a concerning level at his legs, he feared what that meant for Matt, for what he’ll have to endure once his unit had been given permission to leave, he had hoped that their way out of London wouldn’t be too arduous, but that was a much too frivolous wish on his part, and he knew that.

 The air was so cold that breathing it in seemed to sting at his lungs, he shivered as he walked, breathing out shaking breaths that brought about a fog around his chin, circling his face before dissipating into the air. His injuries throbbed painfully, pulsing against his wrappings, shifting his temperature from hot to cold in quick flashes. The weather didn’t help with this.

Tom squinted against the wind, blinking furiously as his skin was pelted with the sharp chill of the raging snow. He gritted his teeth as the rebel in front of him pulled too hard at his restraints. They had tied him up too tightly, his arms ached from behind him, his joints creaked in protest, threatening to dislodge if he moved the wrong way.

His throat burned, the pressure from the rope around his neck worsening how it tightened with his anxiety. He feared that he wouldn’t be able to breathe, but every time his thoughts began to spiral, the rebel at the front of the group who were guiding him seemed to sense this, and abruptly pulled the rope forwards, like he were a misbehaving dog in a choke leash.

“Watch it, Mask.” The rebel jeered, his smirk only growing at the glower he received in response. “Can’t have you passing out before we get to those dead men you call your unit.” He scoffed, the other rebels around him snickered as they too watched for Tom’s reaction. Now that the once mysterious rebel leader was unmasked, most of the rebels who he had scorned hungered for any kind of retribution.

Tom didn’t give them that satisfaction, instead grinding his teeth against the gag they forced on him as he kept his head down.

“Pathetic.”

Tom heard one of them whisper as he was tugged forward again, though he didn’t expect it this time, which caused him to let out a garbled, choking, cry as he stumbled on his feet. He was able to steady himself before he could fall, but he could feel himself shaking, his body was at its limit, and this rough handling wasn’t helping to stabilize his condition.

One sweeping glance around him revealed an unabashed glee in the eyes of the rebels at the sorry sight of him. Tom committed their faces to memory, a small part of him still raging at their audacity to do this to him. After ALL he had DONE when they were too WEAK, too COWARDLY to do anything themselves.

Traitors.

Traitors the FUCKING LOT OF THEM!

He has had ENOUGH betrayals.

“You have 3 minutes, Mask. Make it count.”

Tom looked at the rebel who addressed him with the barest tilts of his head, but the man had already faced away from him and was opening the doors to Waterloo block without much preamble. The doors opened with a loud creak, the light from outside spilled in like a flood, illuminating weary faces on the other side, squinting against the sudden intrusion and billowing cold.

“Say your goodbyes scum.” The rebel who opened the door addressed Tom’s unit with a sneer, the other rebels stepped up to his sides, weapons on standby, which made those closer to them back away in trepidation.

Tom was pulled into the middle, the rope around his neck tightened too much as it happened, he choked on his spit, his mouth tried to open to take in a gulp of air, but the gag wouldn’t let him. His vision blacked out for a moment as he fell to his knees, unable to cushion himself with his hands tied. His head snapped down concerningly fast, but he felt the rebel pull the rope up, causing his head to lift up with the movement, he let it happen, as he felt his strength leave him exponentially.

He found himself staring up at a blurry ceiling.

“3 minutes.” A voice beyond him said, sounding too far away to his ears.

“What the fuck DID YOU BASTARDS DO TO OUR LEADER?!”

“THOMPSON!!”

“LEADER!!”

“THOMPSON?!”

“HOLY SHIT! WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HIM?!”

“THOMPSON! THOMPSON!!!”

Stop yelling.

Stop yelling.

Stop yelling.

Stop yelling.

Stop yelling.

Stop yelling

Stop yelling.

Stop yelling

Stop yelling.

Stop yelling

Stop yelling.

Stop yelling

Stop yelling.

Stop yelling for him.

He doesn’t want to save you.

This isn’t for you.

This wasn’t ever supposed to be for you.

He’s not a hero, this isn’t a selfless act. He doesn’t fucking care so STOP FUCKING YELLING.

He only cares about…

“…Tom…?”

Hands. Gentle hands on his face. Familiar. Smooth and unscarred by injury. It means safety. It means silence. It means home.

Tom slowly came back to awareness, enough that he realized that his unit had surrounded him, a few of his remaining fellow Corporals had put some distance between him and other panicked unit members, the ones who looked at him in concern, and the ones that looked at him with hope. As disgusting and vile as that is, at the moment, this moment, it didn’t bother him as much.

He looked directly into two blue eyes, shining with tears that fell freely down freckled cheeks. The droplets heavy with grief, and the tiniest sliver of relief at seeing him again.

Not many people looked at him like that anymore, with concern, with happiness….with grief, knowing that they might never see each other again.

The gag was gone, crumpled on the floor next to the person in front of him. He worked his jaw, testing it out as he tried to get the soreness out.

He smiled, small, pained, but happy.

“Hi Matt…” Tom leaned into his friend’s touch, his lower lip quivered as he tried to keep up his smile. Matt’s expression broke out into anguish, crumbling so pitifully that it made Tom’s heart ache. His friend began to shake, shoulders jumping as his sobs began to escalate. Matt bit his lower lip in an attempt to stop himself, his sobs turning into strangled whimpers as his tears flowed out in earnest, a bead of blood seeped out from between his teeth.

The hands cupping Tom’s face were trembling, badly. Tom never let his smile waver even so, he shook his head and made small clicking noises with his tongue. “Shhh, shhh…Hey, don’t cry…” He whispered softly between them, slowly moving forward as he did so. “Matt, come on, shhh its okay. You’ll be okay. Look at me, Matthew, hey. You’ll be okay, I promise…” Once he was close enough, Tom gave him his best reassuring smile as he rested his forehead against Matt’s own. “No more tears now, okay? You’re safe now…”

Matt blubbered, Tom’s words only proving to renew his tears. He surged forward, wrapping his arms around his friend as he cried into his shoulder. Tom grunted, a sharp, short pain lancing through him at the motion, but he didn’t make it obvious as he leaned against Matt’s body.

This was a warmth he was never going to forget.

“W..What about y-you??” Matt hiccupped against his shoulder, muffled enough that only Tom could understand it, being so close. “T-Tom…I can’t- I can’t without-“ Matt let out a pained wail, unable to finish his sentence, his cries muffled into the fabric of Tom’s bloodied uniform.

Tom’s throat tightened, stinging with something sour. He swallowed hard and willed away the tingling sensation around his eyes.

He looked up around them, seeing the saddened gazes of his unit members as they watched Matt cry into his clothes. There was a hint of confusion in their eyes, no doubt wondering why Matt was reacting like this towards him. He wanted to shield his friend from their looks, he knew that once he was gone, there was a possibility of Matt becoming a target, it was obvious now they knew each other on a more familiar level than what they had let on at the start.

He didn’t want Matt to be his replacement. Never.

Tom locked eyes with Corporal Devinson, who was the only one watching them neutrally.

“Devinson…” Tom said, his voice rough and gravelly. “I struck a deal with the rebels, they’re allowing the unit to leave London, on the condition that you never return.” Devinson’s eyes widened at that information, along with several other unit members. Tom continued. “Corporal, do you remember what play our Colonel was fond of?”

Devinson’s gaze sharpened at the coded words. He glanced up at the rebels waiting by the door, watching them intently. He looked back at his leader. “It was cursed.” He replied.

Tom smirked. “You should give it a read, at least. My favorite line was from Act 5, third scene.”

“I’ll try, leader.”

“Good..” Tom felt Matt beginning to settle as his sobs pattered away to small whimpers and hiccupping. He gave Devinson a softer look, wishing he could hold Matt the same way his friend was doing to him. “Take care of the unit, Devinson. Promise me you will.”

Corporal Devinson stood at attention, he nodded his head sharply. “Always, leader.” Then his gaze turned sad. “I’m….I wish we could do something….I’m so sorry Tom….”

They weren’t friends.

Tom didn’t comment on the use of his name. He regarded his whole unit silently before he spoke. “Look after each other, listen to Devinson. I’m sorry it ended like this. At least this way, you’ll be far from the conflict.” He shook his head when some of them seemed to want to protest, Baxton most of all. He clicked his tongue, quieting them. “No. This is how it ends. We failed. I failed. You have to leave. This is my last failsafe, this is my last defense to keep this unit safe.”

It was terrifying how easily he could lie through his teeth.

He couldn’t care less what happened to them now.

But Matt still needed them. Need their protection. He doesn’t trust any of them, but their sentiments were always easy to play to.

Hilarson had influenced them like that.

Tom felt something constrict his heart, but as always, he ignored it.

For Matt’s sake.

“Promise me. You’ll look after each other.”

The unit was silent.

Then they voiced out their agreements, though seemingly strained, as they looked down at their leader and at each other.

Tom sighed, he moved back a bit, causing Matt to sit up a little and look into his eyes again. His friend’s face looked a bit puffy, his eyes were red and still tearing up, his breath shook as he took in air in small gasps. Tom smiled sadly, knocking their foreheads together one last time before he moved to stand. Matt was immediately at his side and helped him up.

But before he let go, Tom whispered into his ear.

“I’m sorry, about everything.”

Matt’s eyes widened, but before he could say anything, Tom was suddenly pulled backwards with a cry, he fell to the floor but was still dragged backwards as he choked and gagged.

“TOM!” Matt shrieked, along with the startled and angry yells of protest from the unit members around him as they all surged forward, trying to get to their leader.

They were stopped as guns were pointed at their faces.

“Time’s up.” The rebel who had pulled Tom back spat. He watched in satisfaction as Tom curled in on himself on the floor, wheezing. He looked back up at the rebels with a scowl. “Get out of London.” He sneered before he jerked his head back, signaling for the others to follow him out while keeping their weapons trained on the unit.

Tom cried out as he was roughly pulled to his feet again.

“YOU’RE HURTING HIM!! STOP!! STO-!”

“Prince.” Devinson stood in front of Matt, who tried to run forward. The Corporal put his hands on Matt’s shoulders, he ducked his head down and shook it slowly. ‘Don’t’ He mouthed as a warning.

Matt’s eyes darted towards his own, panicked. A protest rolled up to his tongue, but in a split second, he managed to catch Tom’s gaze just as he was lead out of the doorway.

Tom’s eyes, despite the situation, was just as soft as it looked when Matt had held him on the floor.

“Shhh…”

Matt wouldn’t hear it, of course, but he knew what Tom was trying to say.

Tears fell freely from his eyes again, seemingly freezing on his cheeks this time, without the warmth of his friend nearby.

Tom smiled at him, sad, slow, final.

Then he was gone. --- OOH MINI FIC? HAHAHA ANYWAYS SOME NOTES: “Corporal, do you remember what play our Colonel was fond of?” "It was cursed." > Theater kids like me know we don't say this play's name: The Scottish play. Tom smirked. “You should give it a read, at least. My favorite line was from Act 5, third scene.” > "Bring me no more reports; let them fly all: Till Birnam wood remove to Dunsinane," - Macbeth Act 5 Scene 3

That whole section was basically just Tom telling Devinson to go to Hilarson's safehouse in Scotland. The SCOTTISH play. Dunsinane Hill is in Scotland. Tada, I'm a fucking nerd. BUT ALSO TYSM FOR THE WELL WISHES!! Im rlly tired these days so Im unable to draw much for the blog but yknow. I'll have my time again.

[anartificialsatellite]

The older I get the more I admire people who are earnestly, genuinely into whatever their thing is. I know it sounds like an annoying cliche but unless you're being cruel or hurtful there is really no need to be normal about things. The dude with the bad fake accent at the renaissance faire is having the time of his life. The people having photoshoots with their fashion dolls are loving it. The old lady with a yard unreasonably full of tacky ass lawn ornaments is having a blast, HOA be damned.

Don't waste your time being too cool to have fun, y'know?

[napping-sapphic]

take your clothes off and get on the bed what no we aren’t having sex right now we’re cuddling and pressing every inch of skin together as close as possible for the next six hours

[sushiisiu]

thisis so fuckin embarrassing but the spirit of jayvik just wormed its way back into me after i realize how close arcane s2 is

[fisherrprince]

Instead of writing a fanfic like a normal person this oneshot turned into two separate, contextless things,

[doomedclockworkdotmp3]

heeyyy gaaanggg

the pose and the background of the album version (left) are based on oingo boingos only a lad album art. not cause i think he has anything to do with it but just cause ive been wantin to draw that pose for like. weeks and i didnt know who to put there. so why not my latest bug man.

[skitskatdacat63]

2011 Italian Grand Prix - Vettonso

[disappearenceofsomeone]

ugh sick silly time wahhh

[wildstar25]

[homemadesterekpie]

sometimes people forget that Stiles is a Derek Hale simp

[good-beansdraws]

It's LOVE that guides my cleaver with such tenderness ♡

From Butcher Vanity 🍽

[valtsv]

i've discovered in the past few months that i actually really enjoy socializing and listening to people, and that people like what i have to say and how i say it and my sense of humor (when i'm comfortable and familiar enough with them to be able to be able to be quick witted in conversations). however i'm unfortunately also extremely unsocialized due to a childhood spent alone almost 24/7 and often emotionally abused and neglected, so whenever i stumble (which i frequently do like a baby deer on ice) i default to word vomit, stock photo formulaic responses i've clearly rehearsed before, and that awful kind of defensive, insincere irony that makes it obvious i struggle to trust people and don't feel comfortable in my own skin. and i'm slowly improving and getting better at recognizing it and practicing so i can be more relaxed and self-assured and charismatic, not because i'm trying to be but because i'm genuinely confident and content with being myself, but it's fucking mortifying having to learn and catch up with like 20 years of experience that a lot of the people i talk to had when they were young enough for people to dismiss it as just the process of growing up and being allowed to be immature and make mistakes because you're literally a child (thank fuck for fellow neurodivergent people or i'd feel incredibly lonely despite my newfound joy in human interaction).

[dollopheadedmerlin]

Gwen really just kissed Merlin on the mouth and he still was like huh what a nice friendly gesture

[medichamcham]

re-uploading an old drawing i did because im reminiscing on the idea that gio is a tiny bit insecure about his skin visibly aging as he gets older. so rose happily helps him out with it !! ^_^

[lesbianfakir]

If anyone is wondering what I’ve been doing I’ve been in full blorbo mode over fucking Skyrim of all things which is humiliating. I may have 4000+ hours but I will be the first to say it’s a terrible game

[jnpje]

a long time ago i said 'the world needs more suggestive papyrus images!' as i was encouraging someone to draw what they wanted. but actually i feel like I'm committing a crime whenever i do it myself