#IT WAS FOOD. THE CAKE WAS VERY GOOD AND YUMMY.

[glitchedsoftware]

FUCK DOES THAT MEAN

[zombie-is-shuffler]

[evilminji]

You know how... world leaders can't just? SAY stuff? Because when they DO it's the Offical Stance(tm) of their Country?

That makes their Fuck Ups(tm) all the more serious. It's WHY they have press teams.

But!!!

WHAT IF?

They said something, PUBLICLY, on LIVE TELEVISION, that? Can not be taken back? Full on "masks off, behold the horrors you have payed for" moment?

Sure, they could SAY "that wasn't me" and "I was brainwashed" etc etc. But? If it's BIG enough? UGLY enough? TRUE??? People WILL find it. Dig and dig and dig like termites in the walls. Hunt like bloodhounds.

Riot in the streets.

Because? All it would TAKE? Is ONE half ghost, a few too many long nights trying to balance college classes and his internship, a bigotry filled call from back home, and staring down that empty fridge with just one box of moldering take out, because he's been too busy and stressed to remember to get GROCERIES AND-

Ah.

So this is what "so stressed you feel calm, I have run out of Fucks too give" feels like. Neat. *picks up phone* Hey, Sam? You still at that protest? Outside the presidential speech? Neat. Don't move.

One Phone Line Express later. SAM is telling him to breathe. Maybe... maybe calm down. Think about this. Others around her can see the same "spark of madness" glint in his almost zen like smile.

It Fiiiiine, Sam.

He's just here to Talk.

He disappears. Sam's freaking out. President stumbles but catches himself on the way to the mike. Up in the watch tower, various Magic users choke on their lunches, because a ghost just possessed the United States President.

ON LIVE TELEVISION.

He taps the Mike, smile, leans in real close like he's gonna Tell You Folks A Secret.... Aaaaand~

"The second you Die, you no longer have human rights. Doesn't matter how brief. Heart stops? You're sub-human scum! Non-sentient by American law. We here in the United Stares PROUDLY desecrate the bodies and graves of the dead. Tear apart the immortal souls of the innocent. And condemn you to oblivion crying, begging, and screaming for mercy! Why, obviously, is an act. Because souls don't have the RIGHT to feel fear or pain!

And YES. We do mean EVERYONE'S. Atlantian, Kryptonian, Martian. Canadian, Mexican, Russian, AND Chinese! I could keep going! Once you die? You belong to the United States to experiment on as we see fit! You're PROPERT now! So turn your nonrights having, nonsentient self in to the nearest GIW! For the good of AMERICA. Ectoplasmic Scum!"

*drops mic*

Jaws are on the floor. This was VETERANS DAY. Dead military Heros and smile for the cameras. A cake walk. Do a patriotism, rah rah. There.... there are DIPLOMATS in the crowd. Sure as SHIT, were more then a few foreign nationals WATCHING. Religious leaders looking on in fury, grief, and horror.

Reporters. Oh sweet Jesus the reporters.

The press secretary faints.

PANDEMONIUM. The president, still dazed and confused from being possessed, gets PUNCHED on live television be his VP, a deeply religious if moderately shady man. Take bribes? VP is cool with that. Bootstraps, peasants, and all that. But how DARE you fuck with the Souls of the dead. How DARE you!

Phones are blowing up, questions are being shouted, the JLA Dark FEEL like they should tell somebody about the ghost kid... but also this feels VERY "Call for help-y" so they might throw their weight around instead and pretend they know nothing. World leader are meaningfully staring at their Dear Beloved Dead Grandmother's photos as they send LIVID assistants to hound the American into answering the DAMN PHONE-!

And Danny?

Danny feels calmer now. He has stolen like....700 bucks from secret security's various wallets. He's going to buy himself BOUGIE groceries. Some...some NICE take out. Maybe a little cake. Yeah~ Cake for Danny~

If anyone needs him? No you don't. He needs to go do some shopping, eat, lie on the floor of his shower and just... vibe for a bit under the spray. In the dark maybe. Sleep for a week. Have his food. Yummy little treats.

Or he's gonna fuckin LOSE IT, man.

(Tucker is actively hacking his college schedule as they speak. He KNEW it. Called it! Too many classes! But does Mr "I can handle it" listen? Noooooooo! Now look what happened! Holy SHIT, Danny!)

@hypewinter @hdgnj @ailithnight @nerdpoe @the-witchhunter

[honeytonedhottie]

honeys guide to fall⋆.ೃ࿔*:･🧸💕

i am so so excited for fall 2024. this fall we're serving bambi doll, cupcake and espresso scented, french tips and nudes, crispy chocolate croissants and coffees, sweaters and mini skirts…💬🎀

FALL BEAUTY ;

♡ soft bouncy curls

♡ nude lip combos

i recommend the nyx butter gloss (madeleine) and the nyx chocolate lip liner for a pretty chocolaty look. if ur looking for another nude lip combo use the nyx butter gloss (angel food cake) and the nyx club hopper lip liner…💬🎀

♡ french tips

♡ nude colored manicures and pedicures

♡ marshmallow scented hand creams

as the weather gets colder it becomes more and more important to keep ur skin moisturized and hydrated. carrying around a sweet smelling hand cream can help your hands to stay soft and not dry…💬🎀

♡ fall scented lip balms, body nectars and fragrances

pumpkin, coffee, vanilla, cupcake, chocolate, cinnamon, caramel and buttercream scents are giving fall…💬🎀

lets talk fall beauty products and scents because my favorite part about literally everything is the pampering aspect and the smelling super yummy so lets get into it. the body products i recommend to capture that fall, bambi eyed, doll scent and vibes are.

the sugar cookie body wash from native

ooey gooey cookie body wash from philosophy

chocolate chip body wash from philosophy

all the cozy fireside s’more scents from bodycology

coco coffee body scrub from victorias secret pink

cupcake swirl body fragrance from bodycology

♡ for nails, tapered square french tips or oval shaped nails in nude colors

♡ claw clip hairstyles including half up-half downs or just a classic claw clip pony

FALL FASHION ;

fall fashion to me is tights and mini skirts. leg warmers and uggs and form fitting sweaters. let’s talk about some fall fashion. the tights and mini skirt combo is a classic and it’s an amazing way to incorporate wearing mini skirts even as the weather begins to get a little colder. the tights add a nice touch, even if it isn’t the color of ur skin tone, tights IN GENERAL look rly nice.

ankle boots, ugg boots, BOOTS are so so fall. i rly love ankle boots that have a heel to them and bonus points if ur fall shoes include fur. the fall shoes on my shopping list are ->

ugg boots

ankle boots

mary jane style shoes

ballet flats

form fitting sweaters and jackets are so in for the fall. along with tracksuits. the color pallete for having a bambi doll fall are very much browns, cashmeres, and baby pink. honestly think of neapolitan colours. pink, brown and an off-whitish almost pastel yellow. think PASTRY PRINCESS.

baby phat puffers are perfect for the transition from fall to winter and a good pair of jeans is CRUCIAL for fall. another thing i wanna talk about with fall fashion is LAYERING. layering is such an important aspect of fashion period but ESPECIALLY fall fashion. experiment with different lengths, textures etc. one of my favorite layering combination during the fall is ->

long sleeve tops with a camisole underneath

a form fitting long sleeve top (the ones with buttons at the front) look so DOLLY and adorable when u dont button it, and wear a camisole underneath. its just MWAH. some more fall fashion details also include ->

fur details

ribbons and lace details

delicate jewelry choices

tights and leg warmers

layering

boots

neopolitan cinnamon princess color scheme

long sleeves

mini skirts + tights combo

HOW TO BE A HOTTIE DURING FALL ;

to be a hottie during the fall lets talk about our fall essentials to be our hottest, healthiest and happiest selves this fall…💬🎀

♡ warm milk and honey with a pinch of cinnamon (a real treat)

♡ warm, buttery croissants

♡ wired headphones and a good fall playlist

a good fall playlist consists of artists like lana del rey, pink pantheress, sabrina carpenter and sade…💬🎀

♡ candles that smell like cinnamon cupcakes

♡ a few juicy novels to read

my favorite genres of books to read during this season include mystery, romance and historical fiction…💬🎀

♡ keep up with ur health

during the colder seasons its important to take good care of ur health so make sure that ur taking ur supplements/vitamins, drinking herbal teas and eating a balanced diet to avoid getting sick…💬🎀

[lunamoonbby]

🌺💖🎀Simon's Little House Wife🌺💖🎀

Gif credit goes to @poohbea

Warning ⚠️: slight body insecurities on Simon's end, female reader, reader is referred to be short like 4'11 height, reader being called wifey or lovie simon is referred to as hubby, reader having a slight belly pouch, and NSFW MINORS DON'T INTERACT

Being Simon's short little house wife who enjoys cooking and baking sweets for her hubby cause he's big and needs a the nutritional food he can get.

Simon who wasn't a big fan of sweets until he tasted a cupcake from his lovie.

Simon who can't help himself to just only one plate and will eat how ever much servings as he possibly can

Lovie who has to cook for a literal army meaning the pot that can have everyone eat the same leftovers for 5 days(I'm pretty sure we all know the pot) cause her hubby has an appetite as big as him.

The pot never really having 5 day leftovers inside but only enough for lovie and hubby to have for lunch the very next day

Lovie who make sure there is always sweets around, like cake, cupcakes, brownies, cookies, pies...just baked goods in general

Simon who starts to gain a bit of weight but doesn't know until someone tells him

Wifey who enjoys seeing the weight he put on cause it was her food that did that, and Simon is much more comfortable to cuddle with since he isn't all muscle anymore and has a nice dad bod going on

Simon who did his on base medical exam finding out he gained weight cause the doctor asked if he was bulking again (doctor was afraid he was going to go from walking brick wall to a walking tank cause he's already menacing enough)

Simon who is confused and when he really sees himself that's when he notice the weight gain

Simon who comes home and eats only a little bit of food and wifey being confused as to why that's happening

Wifey asking simon what's wrong you always EAT my cooking and that looks like a snack for you

Simon who tells her his insecurities saying he gained weight and he fears that he's no longer attractive

Lovie giving him that look before saying that she knows about the weight gain and that he's still the simon she married and that he's much more comfortable to cuddle now that he's not pure muscle, and his body heat keeps her warm at night, and it swells her with pride knowing that her food is that great and that he is getting the nourishment that he needs, and that he also eats her out like a man starved leaving no crumbs behind

So with that said simon is like I want dessert first and lovie being excited cause she made a yummy peach cobbler and Simon having to tell her not that kind of dessert but I will have me a piece of that cobbler when I'm done with you and my dinner

Lovie not being able to wait anymore goes in the living room lies down on the couch and lifts the skirt part of her dress up and removes her panties so Simon can get to eating which he does until reader has to push him away and squeeze her thighs together like she's gonna crush his skull

Simon who is content with his life

Lovie who brought in a batch of cupcakes for 141 cause it was prices birthday and it gave her and excuse to be a little baker

Soap saying that his LT's wife looks like a milf cause the sundress + belly pouch = mom bod and she also mothers the 141 and ghost reprimanding soap

141 getting a taste of lovies cupcakes and everyone telling ghost that they can see why he gained weight cause his lovie just makes really delicious food

Wifey who is like say all what you want about my hubby but I love him just the way he is, he looks even more grizzly, he knows exactly how to satisfy me and I love my walking tank he makes my size kink go brrr and he keeps me very warm when it's cold just like a bear and she just starts singing cuffing season by SZA

Simon bringing his wife in for a hug cause his wife is his hype woman and he can't get over how loving she is

141 wanting to have a wife like Simon's cause they're all jealous of the treatment simon is getting from his wife

[missmugiwara]

Got It Bad ♡ Part 2

Summary: fem!reader x Luffy // please read part 1 first // You need a snack. Luffy needs a snack. You should help each other out, but be careful because you really spoil Luffy too much. Warning: 18+, slightly NSFW, very suggestive, slight dom Luffy, we getting a little freaky with food but nothing crazy Note: Back by popular demand! I don't usually do this, but the amount of love I received from part 1 (which was meant to be a one-shot originally) has really touched my heart. So I am honored to give you more Luffy love. Thank you all so much!

♡ Please read Part 1 first! Here is Part 3! ♡

♡ This chapter is a gift for the lovely @kingofthe-egirls ♡

Oh, Luffy that wonderful tease.

Get him back? Get him back?

How could you possibly get him back for that dirty little stunt? That carefree, dirty, yummy, delicious little stunt that made your heart skip a beat. Let's face it - Luffy was too fast and too silly. An expert at shenanigans. Maybe you needed to think a bit harder, somehow be one step ahead of that goofy man.

Maybe… you needed to think this over while having a snack.

So you merrily walked into the kitchen, and Sanji greeted you with an adoring smile. You smiled back politely and glanced over to the table to see Luffy seated and stuffing his face.

Speaking of snacks, Sanji always prepared a succulent snack every day - one for each of the Straw Hats - but of course, Luffy's insatiable apetite always left said rubber man wanting more. And when he asked the cook for more, he was denied.

This was where you, Luffy's sweet savior, came in to be the answer to his food-related problems.

Sanji obviously had a soft spot for you. So if you asked Sanji for more food, then he gave you more. This was really easy. All you needed to do was whisper hotly in his ear, and he was swayed. Really, you could do anything and Sanji would be spewing his eternal love for you. Yes, it made you feel bad to use him, but you kept doing it over and over.

Why?

Because you were in love.

This was all solely for your captain. That gluttonous, silly, cute-as-a-button captain. The events of a earlier in the day kept replaying in your head. How Luffy grabbed you, how Luffy spoke, how comfortable he was and how…

How much of a hot mess he made of you!

It was truly no fair how provocative Luffy was and how natural it came. He made it effortless whilst you were over here struggling to tell him your feelings. You let out a sigh when you sauntered further into the kitchen at your dilemma, with Luffy so deep in consuming his snack he did not notice you.

Your attention flickered back over to the cook, who let you know he just finished baking a cake. Going back to the point about being Luffy's sweet savior, if you got extra food from Sanji then you gave it to Luffy. If Luffy ate the food, he was happy. If he was happy, then you were overjoyed. You would do anything for Luffy. Plus, Luffy knew you would do anything for him - especially if he asked you to work your magic on Sanji. Goodness, you really were spoiling him.

So when Luffy tugged at the hem of your shirt oh-so innocently, breaking you from your thoughts, you knew it was time for seconds. Sanji started to catch on to this, and when he inquired if you were handing off food to Luffy, you lied. In the end, he'd see you and Luffy cackle away, and he'd curse himself for falling for you once again.

Despite this, there was no problem from Sanji as you walked back from the fridge with an extra slice of cake in tow - chocolate with strawberry filling and frosting. Upon seeing you carry a slice, Sanji quickly excuded himself to go give one to Nami and Robin outside. You hummed as you sat down next to Luffy who had the biggest smile. You forked up a piece and held it up to his mouth.

Sweetly, you called, "Here, Luffy!"

With a big ahhh Luffy stretched open his mouth and chomped down, leaving you to giggle in content. He was too cute for his own good. Feeding him was the best because he was always so appreciative. As of lately, he was reciprocating. Luffy would feed you as well. At first, you both thought nothing of it since it was so innocent, but it was becoming one of these special things that only you two shared in.

For a split second, you two locked gazes. A small blush appeared on the captain's face, and in turn your face was becoming really hot. What was that look in his eyes? Moments like these kept happening more frequently. They were beginning to occur out of pure innocence, but they kept you hopeful that maybe, just maybe this was a sign of affection from Luffy somehow.

Luffy broke your gaze first, looking back at the table to grab a cookie. Trying to shake off this rising heat and a tingle now forming in the pit of your stomach, you quickly glanced back at the table to gain a sense of normalcy back. That's when you got a great idea.

"Hey, Luffy?"

With a mouth full of food, he spluttered out, "What?"

"Boop!"

You leaned in to gently tap him on the nose, wiping a bit of frosting on it. You pulled back to smile at the confused captain. Luffy went cross-eyed trying to stare at what was on his nose until he registered it as cake frosting.

"Hey! Why'd you do that?" he beamed at the spontaneity, trying to sound mad but really was only amused.

"Just thought it would be fun!" you cooed, swiping your finger across the cake to re-frost your captain. Could this really get him back? Probably not, but it was still fun nonetheless. You turned to him, laughing, ready to strike again - but Luffy caught your wrist.

"Nope!"

There was a hint of playfulness in Luffy's tone, and he somewhat roughly pulled you toward him - though he would never hurt you in a million years. Locking eyes with him, you parted your lips slowly in confusion. You stared at Luffy, and he at you for what seemed like forever. He grinned before pulling your hand up to his lips. He stuck his tongue out, and you twitched nervously.

Was he about to…?

And he took a long lick of your finger.

A long, slow lick. Luffy, who did not break his gaze from yours for even a second, watched your expression change instantly. An intense heat fluttered over your cheeks. So many thoughts flooded your brain. The biggest one being - oh gosh, what was that lidded gaze he was giving you? Your heart thundered in your chest and the room was becoming unbelievably hot, and this was unbelievably hot, and-

"Mmm, so sooo good!"

It didn't help as Luffy completely sucked your finger into his mouth, and you could feel his warm, wet tongue move against it. A squeak escaped past your lips, and Luffy only swirled his tongue around your finger before he released you with a pop of his lips, smiling widely at his work. In your stunned state, it was too bad you didn't notice his other rubber arm snaking around you quietly to grab at the piece of cake on the table.

Oh, my god - he really just did that!

What a tease.

What a freaking tease, but you only wanted more. Why stop there? You needed him, desired him. Gladly, you would let the captain put his mouth anywhere he'd like. Any part of your body! Just so long as his lips would -

WHAM!

Luffy was so good at invading your thoughts as well as taking you out of them. He smashed the cake right onto the side of your face. You had just the smallest fraction of time to think, so you raised your arm to block yourself. It wasn't quick enough. Luffy rendered you a mess. Cake in your hair, on your face, neck - all the way down into your shirt.

"Oh, Luffy!" You looked down at the mess that was yourself, "You got me real good, huh?"

You looked back at him with a sheepish smile. Normally, you should have been mad, but it was Luffy. Because of that reason alone, you let him do whatever he pleased much to the dismay of your crewmates. You laughed, and he joined you. It was no surprise that he would do this, however, what was a surprise was the way he seemed to look at you.

It was a different kind of look - a look of hunger, a look of pure starvation yet not aimed at food. Something a bit more hard to define. Perhaps it was a look of being bothered. The captain was staring at you with a sort of devious smirk, brows furrowed together in focus, and tongue sticking out of mouth.

"Uh… Luffy?"

Whatever that hungry look in his eyes meant, the butterflies were returning to your stomach.

"Luffy?" you meekly whispered, face turning hotter and hotter in that second.

Luffy smirked as his eyes snapped to meet yours.

"Still such a dirty girl!"

Lips parted as you released a gasp, face set on fire because - well, you weren't expecting him to say that again! The captain only let out a loud laugh at your flustered expression, and it only made your face heat up further.

"Oh, captain, please!"

Before you could even blink, Luffy's grip on your wrist tightened. He moved so quickly, leaning forward to grab you. Luffy lifted you, swiping his arm across the table to move any dishes out of the way. Immediately, your back was slammed against the table roughly, and your eyes clamped shut at the impact. When they opened, Luffy was on top of you. His hands on either side of your face, holding your wrists down. His knee parting your legs. He let out a small grunt and the corners of his lips curved upward into that loveable smile you adored so much.

"Sanji doesn't like wasting food, ya know!"

If Luffy hadn't spoken, you might have passed out right then and there from this compromising position.

"Well, I know that, but I need to… to…"

To fuck the captain's rubber ass.

Wait! Get it together!

You moved your face off to the side, biting your lower lip in frustration. Need to what? Go take a shower? You could never waste Sanji's food. Ignore the heat on your face? Too late for that. Ignore the heat in your lower stomach as Luffy shifted to press his lower body closer to yours? Ignore how damn hot he was? "I'm not done with my snack."

You froze, snapping your gaze back to him.

"So hold still, would ya?"

You breathed in sharply, and that was it. Your breath hitched in your throat at Luffy's tone. The low, seductive tone. It made your mind reel. He locked you in, and this is the moment where you regretted spoiling him so much. He knew! He knew you spoiled him immensely and you'd always be there for him. He knew you would never disobey, knew you'd practically do anything for him.

"Captain's orders." he smirked again, as if to make sure you heard.

Looking at your captain's lips, you breathed out huskily, "Yes, captain. Whatever you want, I'll do it."

There was that hungry look again. He grinned in response, "Good!"

Luffy moved like lightning. Another squeak came from your parted lips when his face went down to your collar bone, taking one lick from it (agonizing - yet tantalizingly slow) all the way up your neck right to behind your ear. Making sure not to miss a single inch of skin covered in frosting, the captain let go of your wrists to brush a stand of your hair out of the way. The man needed food, and damn it all if anything were to get in his way.

You mewled against his touch, instantly reaching to grab fistfuls of his opened shirt, doing everything in your power to not squirm because Luffy was being quite ticklish. Another squeak once Luffy's tongue stopped, and he decided it would be better to start sucking any cake left on your skin. It all felt so tingly under his touch, and though this was not really a true kiss - every spot his mouth landed on was like fire.

"Mm… Luffy-"

"I'm not done!"

Oh, thank goodness.

He smirked against your neck before moving down further, pressing his lips lightly to a enticingly low spot on your chest. He moved his mouth open, sucking off a small glob of frosting with a pop of his lips. He pulled away to prop himself up by the arms.

"Tastes even better like this!" he smiled widely, a slight blush at his face.

He was waiting for you to say something, yet you laid there with wide eyes. Did that just happen? Because… that totally just happened! Amidst the captain's laughter, somehow in this stunned stated you managed to move your hands to hold his face. His wonderful, wonderful face. Immediately, he froze to stare down at you. With your thumb, you gently brushed the side of his cheek with it, noticing how messy of an eater he was. Crumbs and frosting dusted his cheeks, his lips, almost anywhere on his face. It caused you to snicker, and Luffy blinked at this.

"Hold on, captain. You really are so messy!" you stroked his cheek again, "Come here."

This time, Luffy watched you with intense eyes. Softly, you pulled his face close with a lidded gaze. He was oddly silent and intenly focused on your movements. In this state, you realized your hands were trembling out of nervousness - but you wanted to try. Try getting a taste of him. You opened your mouth as you pressed your lips to Luffy's cheek, sucking off a small fraction of frosting in one fell swoop - and also, maybe just letting it linger in a tiny kiss as well. Once you were done, Luffy pulled back and cocked his head to the side as he seemed to be studying you. He broke out in a warm smile, and you returned it.

There was a pause.

"I like seeing you smile. I like being the reason it happens."

In one swift movement, Luffy was back at your chest to cause a gasp from your mouth and your fingers to clutch his raven locks when his hat fell forward from his head. Luffy really didn't skip a beat, especially when you heard him snicker against your skin again. You wished he would go lower on your breasts with his tongue - oh, please - but there wasn't as much of a mess there. Luffy promply worked his way back up, along your collar bone again and up your jawline, along your cheek until -

His mouth was very close to yours. A small amount of cake just barely touched the corner of your lips. Luffy leaned in to eat this one last bit, and you felt like you were doing backflips. It was just the smallest touch, ever so small, and if he had moved to his left anymore… it could have been a kiss.

But Luffy pulled away.

In the blink of an eye, the sultry look he had was gone. He bore a huge smile and laughed while placing a hand on the back of his head. It seemed he was almost a little bashful, but it was hard to tell with someone as confident and straightforward as he.

"I really like being around you!"

His face was flushed, and yours matched.

"Let's do more of this!"

More? More of what!? The eating or the kissing? Your heart was racing. Before you could attempt to agree (as your mind was broken at the moment, and your heart leaped out of your chest and landed somewhere), he was out of his seat and placed a hand on the kitchen door.

Luffy turned to smirk at you, "Oh, and I'll remember that you said you'd do whatever I want!"

Spoiled.

Again, a rising heat took over your face. You wanted to speak, to ask him what he was takling about - but he was out the door. Luffy left you to wallow in your sexual frustration yet again.

What a tease.

Luffy had to have known what he was doing to you.

[b3ach-bunn7]

CALL ME IF YOU GET LOST

Texts with your best friend Touya (who’s a little bit in love with you)

no quirk au <3

—————————————————————————-

January 9th

8:47 pm

You: OH TOUYAAAAA

You: it’s nearly ur bd 😁 what shall I get u

Touya: Nothing

Touya: Just Ur love 😍

You: ew

You: shall I get u some new earrings

You: OH I COULD PAY FOR ANOTHER PIERCING

Touya: Literally where

Touya: I think I’ve pierced every available location on my face

Touya: Unless… You meant somewhere else 😳

You: EWWWWWWWW

You: UR SUCH A FREAK

Touya: I meant my belly button?

You: stfu

Touya: Get your head out the gutter

You: shut up pooya

Touya: Wow you really got me there!

You: HUSH

January 12th

8:39 am

You: bruh where r u

You: homeroom started like ten minutes ago

Touya: I just woke up

Touya: Leaving onw buy shoti is lissing me kff

You: okay English!!!

Touya: Kys

You: but you can type that right…

January 12th

1:40 pm

You: Touyaaaaaa

You: can we go get food

You: the canteen stuff is rubbish today

You: plz I’m so sos is so hungry I’m dying

Touya: Fatty

You: HEY

You: SO MEAN

Touya: I’m only joking sweetcheeks

You: gross

Touya: You love it

Touya: Shiggy wants to come 2

Touya: Is that Ok

You: sigh fine I guess

Touya: Shall I tell him he’ll be third wheeling if he does 😳

You: yes 🥰🥰🥰😍 he just can’t interrupt our time together my sweet

Touya: Ew

You: you love it

January 13th

7:40 pm

You: GST ON MINECRAFTTT

Touya: I’m doing homework

You: I’m doing your mum OHHH

Touya: Woah

Touya: Telling her u said that

You: PLZ IM JOKING

You: I’ll tell her ur telling porky pies

You: Rei would trust my word over urs anyways 😈

Touya: Lowkey she would

Touya: My own mother 😢

You: I’m just better ig

You: how long r u gonna be

Touya: Give me like fifteen mins

You: BOO

Touya: Bro Aizawa is up my ass rn

Touya: If I hand one more piece of work in late he’s gonna acc kill me

You: idk why u hate him so much

You: i love him

You: and he has that sexy teacher look🤤 those luscious locks

Touya: R u sure u can get off his dick long enough for us to play

You: HAHAHAH

You: STFU

You: ur just jealous

Touya: So very

Touya: Why aren’t u hyping ME up like that

You: cause u smell?

Touya: I’m not playing

You: IM JOKING

You: U smell so good and yummy

You: like cigarette smoke 😍

Touya: 🙄

You: sassy 💁‍♀️

Touya: Stop distracting me so I can work

You: okay smelly

January 15th

2:30 pm

Touya: Y/N

Touya: Y/n

Touya: Y/NNNN

Touya: Queen

Touya: Sweetheart

Touya: Angel

You: if you throw one more piece of paper at my head I’m blocking u

Touya: You won’t check ur phone

Touya: How else can I get ur attention from across the room

You: WE R I. CLASS

Touya: So?

You: think I figured out why Aizawa doesn’t rate u

You: pay attention

Touya: But I miss u

Touya: And I’m bored

You: U LITERALLY SAW ME LIKE HALF AN HOUR AGO

You: AT LINCH

Touya: Ur point?

You: omfg

Touya: So what’s up

You: I’m gonna kill you

January 17th

6:50 pm

Fuyumi: Hi Y/N

You: hey fuyumi!!

You: everything okay?

Fuyumi: Yeah, it’s great!!

Fuyumi: Just wanted to tell u that everyone needs to be at ours for Touya’s party at 5:00

Fuyumi: We’ll tell him to come home at like six so that gives us some time to get everything ready

You: beautiful

You: do u think he has any idea were throwing him a party 🤭🤭

Fuyumi: I don’t think so 😆 we have been very careful

Fuyumi: Even shoto has kept his mouth shut

You: yeah I had to threaten twice a couple times before he promised to not tell

You: IM EXCITED

Fuyumi: Me too!!!

Fuyumi: Can’t wait to see u 😊

You: I can’t wait either!!!

Fuyumi: I hope he’ll like it

Fuyumi: We’re getting mum to drive all across town to get him that cake he loves

Fuyumi: I really want him to have fun

You: don’t worry babe he will have fun

You: and if he doesn’t I’ll force him to 😈

January 17th

7:00pm

Touya: U guys r throwing me a surprise party right

You: what?

Touya: For my bd

Touya: Fuyumi is being all suspicious

Touya: Told me I have to leave the house tomorrow but also come back at six oclock??

Touya: And the little brat keeps giggling at me

You: uhm don’t call little shoto that

Touya: Ur deflecting

Touya: They r throwing a party aren’t they

You: they aren’t

You: idk why you think that

Touya: Y/N

You: WHY DO U HAVE TO RUIN EVERYTHING

Touya: Lol

You: please please don’t tell them you know

You: they’re so excited for do this for you

You: [screenshot attachment]

You: look what Fuyumi said to me

Touya: Oh

You: please don’t spoil 😔

Touya: Don’t worry your pretty little head

Touya: I won’t

You: YAY

You: LOVE U

Touya: Ly2

January 18th

12:00am

You: [audio messsage]

You: enjoy me whisper singing happy bd to u

You: HAPPY BIRTHDAYYYYYYY WOOOOO

You: LOVE U THE MOST

You: okay I need to sleep we have school tomorrow

January 18th

3:07am

Touya: Thank you y/n

Touya: Ly the most too

January 18th

6:15 pm

You: Touya where tf r u

Touya: I’m On my way!

You: we’ll be On your way! FASTER

Touya: STFU

You: U STFU

Touya: U TOLD ME TO MAKE THIS BELIEVEBE

Touya: MY FAMILY WOULD NOT BELEIWV I GOT THERE ON TIME

You: wait ur right lowkey

Touya: exactly

You: well walk faster

Touya: I’m not walking

Touya: I’m driving

You: HOW TF R U TEXTING ME

Touya: Imd riving one handed?

You: GET TF OFF UR PHONE 😭

January 19th

12:04 am

Touya: Y/N

Touya: Thank u for gifts

Touya: The strap for my bass

Touya: And the necklace

Touya: I lowbe them

Touya: and the aprty was so fun

Touya: I lovwd it

Touya: and I lobe you

You: that’s okay 😁

You: are u drunk rn🤔

Touya: Snuch out with bawks

Touya: Hrwks

Touya: Hawks

Touya: Raided fathers liquoye supply

You: you went to your dad’s house????

Touya: NO

Touya: never

Touya: stolen from when he was gere

Touya: fukcing loser 😂😂

You: where r u guys?

Touya: hawks house

Touya: his oarents arent home

Touya: u wanbawcome over

Touya: I’ll kuck him out

You: u can’t kick hawks out of his own house 😭

You: why do u even need to kick him out we’re friends

Touya: he flirst with y so much

Touya: flirts

Touya: pisses me off

You: awwwww r u jelly 🥺

Touya: yes

You: LOL

You: yeah maybe lay off the the drinks buddy

Touya: I live u

Touya: love

Touya: I loved the gifts u got me rhwnks

You: you already said babe

Touya: sorry baby Im so drunk

You: okay I’m going to go before you say something you’ll regret in the morning

You: goodnight birthday boy

January 19th

1:05 pm

Touya: Please erase last night from ur memory

You: last night was a movie 😍

Touya: Yeah a fucking horror

You: HAHAHA

Touya: My head is killing me

You: painkillers?

Touya: Idk where they r and Hawks is sleeping

You: did u guys just wake up 😭

Touya: I think I slept like at like five am

Touya: It’s nice smoking inside a house and not in some alleyway so mum doesn’t catch me

You: BOO

You: ur lungs hate u

Touya: I hate them back

Touya: It’s why I smoke

You: LOL SHUT UP

Touya: Fuck my HEAD

You: that’s what he said

Touya: Ew man

You: you love it

You: go drink some h2o

Touya: Enough chemistry in too tired

You: sigh fine

You: go get some WATER 💦

Touya: Fine

You: bye baby 🤪

Touya: I’ll kill you

You: but I thought you love me??

Touya: Ur dead to me

You: HAHHA

January 21st

7:06 pm

You: Touya

You: can I come over plz

Touya: Erm what 😳😳😳

You: seriously

You: can I

Touya: Yh ofc

Touya: You okay?

You: yh

You: well no actually

You: my dads being my dad again

You: I just can’t be in this house rn

You: I need to get away from him

Touya: Yeah u can anytime

Touya: Yk my family loves u

You: thanks

Touya: You want me to pick u up?

You: nah I wanna walk

You: thanks again

You: love u

Touya: Ly2

January 29th

5:28 pm

You: [image attachment]

You: BRUH HOW DID I LOSEEEE

You: I ATE SK BAD

Touya: Bruh get off dress to impress 😭

Touya: U r beefing ten year olds rn

You: idgaf

You: ten year olds who can’t fucking dress

You: I actually hate this game

You: that is NOT STEAM PUNK WHAT THE FUCK

Touya: Maybe get good

You: maybe kys???????

Touya: Words hurt 😔

You: man up?

Touya: Woah

Touya: Okay just perpetuate gender norms..

You: define perpetuate?

You: YH that’s what i thought

February 6th

7:06 pm

You: bro

You: all my friends have valentines apart from ME

Touya: Get good?

You: okay and where’s urs?

Touya: texting her rn 😍

You: omg 😳

You: but on a real I feel horrifically left out

You: Toga keeps flaunting it in my face

Touya: That little freak got one?

Touya: Who

You: yk that girl in 1-A with the chubby cheeks

You: they r so cute omg

You: how come toga has a lesbian lover and I’m jobless and hoeless 😔

Touya: I can help with one of those things

You: u hiring???

Touya: I’ll be ur valentine

You: I can’t tell if ur joking

Touya: I’m not

You: do u have one romantic bone in ur body

Touya: I can think of one 😳

You: LMAO EW

Touya: Nah fr I’ll be ur valentine

You: okay…

You: ask me properly tho

Touya: Okay

Touya: Hey Y/N

You: oh hi Touya! What’s up

Touya: Will u do me the great honour of being my valentine?

You: 😊 yes!

Touya: Thank you 😊😍

February 10th

2:02 pm

Touya: Omg

Touya: Y/N guess what

You: don’t text me in class lil bro

Touya: Someone asked me to be their valentine 🤪

You: what

You: Who

You: is she in our homeroom

You: did u tell her ur mine

Touya: Woahh

Touya: Jealous much

You: no I just don’t want to be a side piece 😔

Touya: No Dw I told her I’m urs 🥺

You: shush

You: yk what I meant

You: who was it tho

Touya: Idk some girl in my maths class

Touya: She seemed pretty sad when I said no

Touya: The ladies love me

You: she’ll get over it!

Touya: LOL

February 14th

8:03 am

You: OMG

You: ARE THESE FLOWERS MINE

Touya: No I got them for ur dad actually

You: TOUYAAA

You: THEYRE MY FAVS

You: THANM U SM

Touya: Anytime Valentine

February 14th

1:20 pm

Touya: Meet at my car

Touya: I’m taking u out for lunch

You: thank gosh

You: they’re selling some mystery meatloaf type deal and I’m no happy

You: hawksy wants to come too

Touya: No

Touya: Just u

You: girl he’s not gonna do anything

Touya: No this is like

Touya: Hold on

You: okay hawks is looking at his phone and typing

You: r u texting him

You: okay he magically doesn’t wanna come along anymore

Touya: Aw :((

Touya: I’m waiting outside

You: see u in a bit smelly

February 14th

1:50 pm

You: ur such a child

You: IM RIGHT IN FRONT OD U JUST TALK TO ME

Touya: NO

You: WHY

Touya: IK SCARED

You: I can see u smiling

Touya: Shut up

Touya: Okay listen

Touya: If u don’t like what I’m about to say we r going to act like this never happened okay

Touya: I will delete the message out of existence and thus out of ur mind

You: okay…

Touya: Okay so I kind of like actually asked u to be my Valentine not just because ur lonely

Touya: And I like really like you

Touya: As in like like

Touya: But I don’t wanna ruin our friendship because ur the best friend I’ve ever had and will ever have

Touya: So if u don’t feel the same we can just pretend this never happened

February 14th

8:00 pm

You: I’m home safe xxx

Touya: Don’t care

You: okay mr message me when ur back

You: okay mr parked in my driveway to make sure I got in okay???

Touya: Shut up

You: wait hold on

You: is that why uninvited hawks

You: so that u could ask me out

Touya: Yeah and the sky is also blue

You: SHUT UL

Touya: He’s so stupid yk

Touya: It was his idea ??

Touya: And he forgot

You: hey three’s a party!

Touya: So you would’ve kissed me as aggressively as you did if Hawks was there?

You: wait ur right..

You: Oh well

You: it was about time anyways

You: took u like three years and u did it over DMS

Touya: I’m shy 🥺

You: EW TF

You: I take the kiss back

Touya: These hickeys tell me a different story

You: HSUTUP

Touya: You love it

You: I love YOU 🫵

Touya: Yeah

Touya: Love you too

—————————————————————————

This was NOT supposed to end with a confession but I physically cannot help myself 😅 I love these text posts they’re so fun!!

Hope u all enjoyed <3

[kitchenwitchtingss]

RECIPES I KEEP IN MY ONLINE KITCHEN WITCH JOURNAL #2

I love making these oh my gosh.

Why?

It's really fun

It's been a while since my last one

I get an excuse to try yummy recipes

You all are way too good at what you do

It's fun x2

Teas, Drinks, And Syrups

🍊 Orange Peel Tea 🍊

Violet Lemonade

Coconut Summer Drink

Dandelion Honey

The Best Hot Spiced Cider recipe you’ll ever try

Apple Cider is basically a homesteading spell

Rose Lemonade Syrup

100-Year Garlic (Garlic Honey)

Fire Cider Spell for Winter Protection

Blackberry & Apple Jam

Witchy Recipes - Blackberry Lemonade

Baked Goods + Sweets

Prosperity Bread

Lavender Earl Grey Cookies

Easy Rosemary Focaccia Loaf for Love and Protection

Heavenly Lavender Scones

Honey Vanilla Peach Butter 🍑

Pumpkin Pie Dip 🎃

Vanilla-Pumpkin Cupcakes

Soups, Stews, And Dinners

Super simple secret potato soup

Forest Porridge

Heartwarming potato soup

Perfect Homemade Garlic Bread

Creamy vegetable soup

Springtime Soup

Stuffed Maple dijon glazed roasted butternut squash

Summertime stir fry

Sabbat Stuff

Litha Orange Honey Cake

Litha Thyme Chicken

Stuffed Apples for Mabon

Mabon Mug

Imbolc Pretzel wreath

Oatmeal Bread for Lughnasadh

Samhain Mulled Cider

Samhain Irish Apple Cake

Angel's Best

(my favorite recipe posts I've made over the years, plus backstories that sound like your grandmother's reminiscing over the past.)

LATE WINTER BUTTER ROLLS

My first post I ever made. I was pretty new to the tumblr community at the time. I loved kitchen witchcraft, and I'm the type of person who will ramble on about how much I love cooking and baking. This blog gave me an outlet to express my love of cooking, baking, paganism, and witcraft. And these rolls are very tasty, I make them to this day!

WITCHY TOMATO BASIL SOUP

Tasty, simple, and a crowd-pleaser. It's perfect for a beginner kitchen witch! It was also the second recipe I ever posted.

SWEET CREAM BUNS

It was a recipe given to me by one of my good friends at the time. Every time I make it, it gets devoured in less than 10 minutes. It was also my first recipe to get over 50 notes. I was shocked but ecstatic that so many people would even give it the time of day lol.

WITCHY THUMBPRINT COOKIES

These ones were just fun to make and delicious lol.

A WITCH’S COZY BUTTERNUT WINTER SOUP

A quick soup that feeds a lot of people during the fall season. Fall is my favorite season, so of course I'm very biased lol.

SAMHAIN PUMPKIN BREAD

I love pumpkin bread and apple cider... So why not combine the two? This one was definitely one of my favorites of all time. Moist pumpkin bread and chocolate chips have to be one of my favorite things on this planet. It also makes for the perfect gift for friends and family. Yummy!

ANGEL’S AWARD-WINNING LEMON POPPY SEED BREAD

I love dessert loaves of any kind, so naturally, this would be on the list lol.

MAPLE BUTTER COOKIES

Super simple comfort food! I love any time of cookie with brown sugar.

BRING ME POSITIVITY PECAN FRENCH TOAST BAKE

I love French toast, and I love positivity~

SAMHAIN SOUL CAKES RECIPE

These are really good! And traditional. If you celebrate Samhain, I recommend you make some soul cakes and have friends and family help decorate. I give the littles a bag of orange frosting and let them go crazy lol.

FEEL BETTER CHICKEN SOUP

One of my most recent is my witchy twist on chicken noodle soup!

[i-literally-cant-with-this]

Mdni

Thinking about being Kafka's needy, horny little wife.

He surprises you when he comes home for lunch one day. You don't have anything prepared for him A) because he didn't tell you and though you could sling some food together for him really quick, B), because you're too busy in your bedroom running a very precise vibrator over your clit.

You're too busy thinking about how yummy he looked this morning. Too busy listening to your most recent favorite song to hear him unlock and come in the front door.

Your eyes are closed, and your legs are wide open, back flat against the bed. Small, breathy and whiny moans escape your lonely lips. God what you wouldn't give to have Kafka stuff you full of his cock right now.

He said your name, but it was drowned out by the music being up so loud. And rather than continuing to holler for you, he just headed down the hallway to the bedroom.

What he saw when he looked around the doorframe was truly a thing of beauty: Your swollen cunt was pulsing again and again as you pulled away just in time to deny yourself another orgasm.

But you didn't know he was there. You didn't hear anything but the melodic serenade of the song you'd put on repeat.

Once you were sure you could keep going, you lifted your head to see where the vibrator landed on the bed. Instead of seeing that, you caught an eye full of Kafka just standing there. Smirking at you.

"So's this what you do all day when I'm keeping the country safe?" He laughed and ducked down when you threw your toy at him. "Hey! Hey ... I come in peace. I can't say the same thing for you, though. Goodness, kitten. You miss me that much, mm?" He said, his voice dropped to a low tone that would've been almost scary if it wasn't so sexy.

He sauntered over to you in his officer's uniform, undoing his pants when he reached the bed.

You hopped right up and got on your knees on the floor, pushing him back onto the bed, pulling his pants down around his ankles, essentially trapping him there.

Of course, he could've gotten away if he wanted to. But he's never said no to your mouth being wrapped snugly around his dick.

You went right to work, bobbing your head up and down the full length of his cock, moaning against him every time you felt the tip hit the back of your throat.

"Fuh- oh - oh my god, kitten. What the hell's gotten into you to- fuck! Today?"

You looked up at him as your hand stroked what wasn't between your lips, coming off of him with a pop, you said, "I juh- fuck," you wiped the wet mess off of your chin with the back of your hand and continued, "I just want you, Kaf, so fucking bad today, want you so bad."

You turned your attention back to sucking him off, fully enjoying the reactions you were getting from him.

His abs and thighs began to tense up, his cock throbbing against your hot tongue. "Hmm ... kit- kitten, gonna - oh fuck, gonna cum f'ya keep that up ... hoh my god, baby ... please ... please please please doh-hon't stop. Don't ever stop."

So, you didn't. You sped up your movements, pulling him right over the edge. "Cuh-cuh-fuckin' cumming! Oh shit, shit shit shit! Hoh god ... b-babe! Fuck!" It was an explosion in your mouth that you wholly consumed.

"C'mere, you." He pulled you up onto his lap and cupped his hands under your ass, squeezing you impossibly close. "I needa eat lunch before I head back. You wanna help me with that? Maybe gimme somethin' tuh eat, mm?"

You smiled against his kiss and got up off of his lap.

"Aht! Where you think y'goin', uh?" He said as he stood and scooped you up into his arms.

"G'na fix you some lunch ... right?"

"Mm-mm. Tag baby cakes. You're it. Now, get back t'how I found ya and get ready. 'M fuckin' starvin' t'day."

Fuck, you love this man.

_______________________

@witchy-scribblings @kazutora-kurokawa @katkusuo

@delirious-donna @darkstarlight82 @bakubunny

@reiners-milkbiddies @supersecretsaga @trevengersprincess

@breathofthewind29

_______________________

[haveyouseenthisskeleton]

For the bones, grandmas gonna grandma

An old woman who knows very little English keeps giving them treats nearly everyday because they are a lovely young man

The treats are from the grandma's country of origin and are all super yummy

Undertale Sans - He's embarrassed at first until he decides to give something back from the Underground to thank her. Now it's a thing. Sans actually likes her so much that he gets worried when she's not showing up. Eh, maybe he has a thing for old isolated women. What are the odds of something similar happening twice in a lifetime?

Undertale Papyrus - He can tell it's an old lonely lady searching for some company and Papyrus loves to invite her home to spend some time with him. He searched for her family and discovered none of them came to see her anymore, and he just couldn't bear the thought. No one should be abandoned in their most vulnerable moments. After some years, when he notices she can't live alone anymore, Papyrus simply lets her live in his house and takes care of her.

Underswap Sans - It's his obligatory stop during his patrols. He likes the old lady who is always nice to him, and now that's a thing. He does grocery trips for her and takes her to have fun some weekends. He hopes some people will take care of her eventually though. He can tell it's getting harder these days for her and he's not sure what he can do to help.

Underswap Papyrus - Honey is very empathetic by nature to the point he feels deeply attached to the old lady. He loves their little talks and their gifts, which he always reciprocates. He can spend hours at her home just entertaining her. He knows he's going to be devastated when she's gone, he is very self-aware she's very old, but no one should be alone in their last years.

Underfell Sans - He's embarrassed. Is he so pathetic-looking that even an old lady can tell he needs affection? He's a bit defensive around her at first, but then as she keeps insisting, he just gives up and lets her do her thing. It feels kinda nice to have someone genuinely interested in him and he's 100% sure it's not to trap him for once. Maybe he can lower his guard.

Underfell Papyrus - He didn't like how she treated him like a child all the time at first, but after some months... Maybe it feels kind of nice. Edge never had a mom so he convinced himself he didn't need one, but here he is, clearly considering this lady like his adopted mom and spending at least two hours each day at her place to complain about his days and actually get listened to and have pieces of advice. It just makes him sad.

Horrortale Sans - Oh he adopted the lady. She's always nice to him and keeps feeding him, so she's family. Like Toriel and Grillby, she has a key of the house and can come and go as she wants when she needs company. He even introduced him to Toriel, because they're very similar and seems to have a lot of common hobbies.

Horrortale Papyrus - Willow volunteers in a retirement home so he's used to this. It still saddens him to see old ladies so lonely they need to give affection to random people instead of their family. Willow gladly plays along and visits her every day just so she knows she's not alone and that he cares as much as she does. The treats are a good excuse to talk, and he is good at cooking as well so he gladly brings her cakes and pastries as well! He even invites her for Gyftmas to have some fun and meet his family.

Swapfell Sans - He's so confused about why she keeps coming back??? He made pretty clear the first time that he didn't want her here and was as rude as he could to dissuade her from getting close again. But then she came back every other day and Nox is just... letting her??? Is he getting domesticated like some feral cat right now? With food and praise? Why the hell is it working? He's not a feral cat, back off! And then she just pets his head and he's completely in shock. He can't fight a grandma. He can't do anything against her.

Swapfell Papyrus - Rus would have loved to do the same thing for her because not a lot of people are nice to him. But... Uh... He's a bit scared he could accidentally food-poison her lol. So he bought her some potato chips. She looked at him with motherly disappointment and he actually felt ashamed and just nodded when she said that she was going to teach him how to cook properly now. He has no idea how he ended up talking in a different language with her and just cooking local Mexican food, but that happened.

Fellswap Gold Sans - He doesn't understand. What is that old woman trying to achieve? Does she want something from him? Is she a spy sent to gather information about him? Is she trying to lower his guard to stab him in the back? He doesn't understand. She still comes to see him with food and just insists he takes it and starts talking about the randomest things to him. Her strategy to get to him is confusing. And ok, maybe he's falling for it and actually trying to be nice to her, and he doesn't know why. He doesn't even know her name. She just showed up one morning and she keeps coming back. Maybe this human doesn't have any survival instinct? This is awful, he needs to protect her.

Fellswap Gold Papyrus - Coffee wasn't sure what to do about this strange lady in his garden at first, but then she was nice to him and gave him food and affection. Now Coffee is that close to calling her mom and he's eagerly waiting for her each day, getting so disappointed when she's not coming. He loves that lady, it's nice to have someone genuinely interested in him and actually willing to give him the affection he lacked for the last twenty years or so. Like Honey, Coffee is going to get devastated when he loses her.

[namis-gf]

Just saw that you’re open for one piece requests and thought I’d drop by.

Would you consider writing back rub and back kisses hcs for katakuri or marco please? And best of luck with the come back ^^

anon ur so insane how did u KNOW i was thinking obsessively about katakuri for the past two weeks straight... ur too good. i meant to stick closer to the prompt but the plot kinda got away from me, sorry!

summary: strawhat!reader x katakuri meet again after many years apart during the whole cake island arc. luffy has been trying to convince him to join his crew with no success, but maybe he might listen to you?

word count: 969 words / 0.9k

cw: none? i think?

whoever said katakuri was 48 year-old eldest daughter syndrome is absolutely correct. he has so many hangups when it comes to both physical and verbal affection, most of the time preferring to passively sit by and let people bother him. case in point, your captain. instead of immediately setting sail for zou to meet up with everyone, luffy has taken it upon himself to convince the minister of flour that his presence is desperately needed on his crew. permanently.

and, if you're going to be polite about it: things aren't going well. you've watched for two days straight, luffy yelling either to the gentle giant's face (which is still quite a distance from the ground), or attempting to scale the walls of katakuri's home. neither of those particularly difficult for the rubber boy, considering the house slash castle itself seems to be basically falling apart.

you wait. nami often sits by your side, either grouching about the time, plotting your captain's demise, or napping on your shoulder. chopper and brook have taken to an almost betting ring of sorts, getting the remaining residents of komugi island to guess whether their leader will stay or go. so far, the odds aren't in luffy's favour. as usual, you might add.

at the end of their fourth extra night, luffy returns to the sunny. he looks a little downtrodden, yawning, but has somehow gotten a hold of a handful of mochi. "i think katakuri was trying to kill me again, but he lost. the food he makes is really yummy though, shishishi!"

with a sigh of your own, you offer, "let me talk to him, i have an idea."

"you do?" luffy replies, mouth full of sweets, "go ahead!"

"call if you need anything!" chopper chimes in.

nami only shakes her head. "if you don't come back, we'll assume you got trampled to death or something. so don't do that please."

"don't even worry about it, i'm basically a pro social hustler," you tell them, and begin the walk to the castle.

"so you are not a bard, or a songstress, or a very small jester. your presence here confuses me, you did not seem like someone who would ever become a pirate," katakuri tells you, his tone as solemn as ever.

"is this a roundabout way of saying i don't have any talents?" you mock-gasp with flair, "oh you wound me so!"

he stares at you wordlessly. okay, it looks like jokes are off the table.

"but you missed me right?" you try instead, putting on your biggest smile. "you missed me so bad, must be why you look so grumpy all the time."

"is your captain aware of..." he pauses, considers, "does the strawhat know of your past?"

"sort of?" you shrug your shoulders, shifting forward to adjust like you aren't already lying on one of his legs (truly the world's largest couch). "there was never exactly a good time to bring it up, ya know? like how was i supposed to say 'uh hey guys, i used to work here as the world's worst gardener before i got fired'."

"hm, that does seem difficult," katakuri nods. "i could not tell how much they knew, but you are lucky that none of my siblings happened to remember you well enough to say anything."

"small blessings for sure," you do your best to contain a laugh, however the echoing chambers of an empty castle only make it louder. "anyways, cut the bullshit. you're gonna come with me, right?"

his neutral expression shifts into something like a frown, and yet you can tell he isn't exactly angry at your presumptuousness either. "i would like to accompany you. but my duties to my... mother and the family take precedence."

"and if you left, she'd send the whole gang after you."

he sighs again. "yes, that is the most probable outcome. and i would not wish to put the strawhat crew in danger."

"that's charming," you reply, "but also really stupid. and i know you aren't a dummy, right? you've been hanging around this dreary archipelago for your whole life! don't you want to, i don't know, do something? go on an adventure?"

he doesn't respond immediately, but a large hand clumsily pats your head with his pointer finger. you grin, knowing victory must be in sight. "your totally evil mom doesn't even leave her place that often, so she won't even notice that you're gone! and tell me right now that you don't think luffy would be chomping at the bit to fight her again? be serious, mochi-mochi."

all of a sudden the ground shifts under you, and you make an embarrassing yelp as you're dragged up and up and up. katakuri holds your body by the back of your shirt, and you're only partially worried that he could drop you. death by splat on marble floor isn't appealing in the slightest. you're suspended by a shirt pinched between fingers as he squints slightly, as though looking for a secret in your expression.

"fine," he eventually says, "i will go. but if something goes wrong, do not say i didn't warn you."

"ah, you're bringing me back to old times!" you hum, making a familiar grabby hand motion for him to drop you on his shoulder. "except i think uh, the last time you warned me-"

"you got fired, yes," he says amicably, but acquiesces to your request. "left or right?"

"right! i wanna look like a really mean parrot, mr. pirate," you exclaim, laughing as he drops you gently where you'd asked. feeling mischievous, you press a kiss against his neck and watch as his face goes pink. "we should probably go make sure that you won't sink the sunny, though!"

"... and you somehow did not think to check something like that before?"

FIN (FOR NOW)

[hitoshitoshi]

Teacher!Caleb would be an elementary teacher if he wasn't a pilot. He's just so patient with the kids, but he's also stern when he needs to be. Teacher!Caleb would teach kids in a way where they could all have fun so that way, they associate learning with fun, and not feel bored while learning. He would make it a competition for who can learn vocabulary the quickest, and have small prizes for them to enjoy.

Teacher!Caleb would make sure to learn each of the kid's likes and dislikes and incorporating it into the examples that he uses so it feels more personalized. "Mhm, you're right on track there, you have a team of 6 Pokemon, and 4 faints, how many Pokemon do you have on your team? [...] That's right, you have 2 Pokemon on your team! You're so smart. How about if you have 3 Pokemon, and you want to double your team—"

Teacher!Caleb would make sure that during lunch time, no kid would go hungry, so he always had a cabinet of snacks, filled with yummy but also nutritious things for them to eat. He was a kid once too, so he knew how much kids wouldn't eat something if he knew that they didn't like the taste of something, regardless of how hungry they were. Whenever a kid runs up to him with their little legs, he already knows the protocol and pulls out his drawer. "Pick any of 'em you want that you want to eat. The whole world — well, drawer — is yours to choose from."

Teacher!Caleb would make sure that no one gets left out and made fun of. He himself, was an empathetic indivudual, and if he was witnessing any bullying, he was going to stop it right then and there. No one gets put down in when he's around, much less in his classroom. Fun Teacher!Caleb was gone the second that there was disrespect going on. He would pull the kid to the side, and make them understand what empathy was, and how the kid wouldn't like it if someone was mean to the kid, so the kid shouldn't be mean to others. He would make sure the kid apologizes to whoever they were mean to — a proper apology: a sorry, the specifics of what they did and why they're sorry, and what they were going to do to change. Teacher!Caleb wasn't going to let these kids grow up to be people who didn't ever apologize or take accountability for their own actions. He took his job very seriously. Teacher!Caleb would make sure that no kids would associate any bad marks or failure with bad connotations. He knew how some kids depended on academic validation, or was stressing because of their parents, so he makes sure to change that mindset so it wouldn't become worse later on. "No, no, no, don't call yourself a failure for not passing a test. Think about it this way, you know what you got wrong and you know what type of studying doesn't work out for you. Instead of focusing on that, think about what you can do for the re-test. You know what you don't know, what you do know, and what form of studying doesn't work for you! That's called "failing forward". Always, move forward and don't stay in the past." Teacher!Caleb would be the type to use his own money to have end-of-the-year parties. It wouldn't be just pizza, but other food too! Pizza, fries, wings, cake, and more. He wanted the kids to celebrate and have a good time before ending the school year — to relax and hang out with eachother one last time before summer vacation started, where some of the kids would be separated from other kids when they move up a grade. He would play fun music and pull out pictures of his partner (you) and show you off to the kids. "Ahahah, yeah! This is my partner, aren't they super cool? I love them to bits and pieces. They're actually my childhood best friend—" Teacher!Caleb would want to make a difference; to actually help kids grow up. He wasn't just a teacher that taught kids schoolwork, he wanted to teach them the foundations of life through different ways of seeing things and learning. He wanted to be that teacher that made others excited to learn. He wanted to be that teacher that people can rely on. He wanted to be that teacher that helped change and guide people's lives in a positive way. He wanted to be that teacher that helped people discover things about themselves. He wanted to be that teacher that helped people to learn to love and respect other people and themselves. He wanted to be the teacher that he never got growing up. He wanted to be that teacher for others.

If you like otome games, including Love and Deepspace, you should join Linkon Lounge! A discord server that's LGBTQ+ friendly (only serving those who are 18+) where we all can share our interests, talk to roleplaying bots (Caleb, Rafayel, Zayne, Xavier, and Sylus), and have fun game, movie, and stream nights where we stream games and/or cards that we pulled that others want to see. It would be super fun to have you as a member of our server.

Click here to join Linkon Lounge!

Masterlist

[intimidating-fettuccine]

Thanksgiving in the mansion

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! I almost took today off because I have a lot of cooking to do, but I got the idea for this and wanted to do this instead. Happy Thanksgiving to all my fellow people that celebrate it, and if you don't celebrate I hope you just have a great Thursday and eat something yummy.

Thanksgiving in the mansion is one of those holidays that almost always turns into absolute chaos. There's people trying to bake and cook things, there's people trying to steal all of the food while it's being baked, and then there are the people who intentionally try and annoy Slender while he's focused on all of his cooking and end up getting whacked with a wooden spoon because they pushed him too much and made him angry. Needless to say, it's your standard holiday in the mansion.

When it comes to food, Slender cooks a FEAST for Thanksgiving and it's one of his favorite holidays because of that. He makes a giant breakfast, he makes appetizers for people throughout the day, and when it comes time for Thanksgiving dinner, that giant, long ass table that everyone sits at is PACKED with yummy delicious foods and desserts, and Slender fucking loves it because cooking is his passion and he would do this every day if he could. There are also so many desserts??? Slender and Tim both make apple pies, Slender makes a pumpkin pie, Jane bakes a cheesecake, Jason bakes an actual cake, and LJ makes a bunch of candies for everyone, they're really lucky the mansion has so many people living there with how much food there is.

Toby is BANNED from the kitchen. Toby is not allowed in the kitchen because he will eat all of the ingredients and food before it's fully ready or on time, and Slender and Tim get tired of yelling at him to stop so he is simply not allowed in the kitchen, much to his disappointment. This leads to people trying to sneak out a few snacks for Toby to try and cheer him up, and then THEY get banned from the kitchen and eventually, everyone is just hungry and grumpy because they can smell all this yummy food and none of them can go in there unless they're part of the cooking team, which none of the people that were stealing food are. 

Also, Slender does the white mom thing of making everyone say one thing they're thankful for before they're allowed to eat dinner. Everyone is sitting down, plates completely filled up, ready to finally gorge themselves on all of this food, and then Slender's like "Now, hold on. None of you have told me anything you're thankful for yet!" And he clasps his fucking hands over his knee as he sits down and waits for every single person to say something, and most of them end up speedrunning through it to get to the food, but he allows it so long as it's an honest answer.

I think after dinner they all probably get pretty comatose from how much food they all ate, and they'll go to the big living room and either take naps together or just watch shows and movies together as a group. I think when they aren't quite as tired, some of the creeps like Jeff, Tim, Toby, Brian, Liu, Natalie, and Pup will go outside and throw around a football or play some soccer or something to relax and have a good time. Sometimes the others will come out and watch or join in, and Slender usually tries to take pictures and videos of it to save it as a good memory for later to reminisce with.

Thanksgiving is one of those days when everyone is getting along and having a good time together, so everyone is usually much friendlier and happier to be in each other's company. It's a day when there's no sadness, or resentment, no inner turmoil. Everyone comes together and bonds as a family and it's a very relaxing, happy experience, and that's the actual main reason that Thanksgiving is Slender's favorite holiday. Not just for the cooking, but the fact that these people he's come to love as his family are all happy, loved, and cared for. If only Toby would keep his hands out of the cake, maybe then Slender could be at complete peace.

[russellsppttemplates]

Hello, could you write a Lance one where it's Margot's first birthday and reader and Lance have a small family party

"Happy Birthday, dear Margot, Happy Birthday to you", everyone sang to the little one year old.

Margot sat in her father's lap, her face slightly hidden away in his chest even though she had her characteristic beautiful smile on her face, looking at everyone standing around the table, looking at her, "Happy Birthday, sweet girl", Lance whispered and kissed her cheek.

Addalynn was happily helping you distribute the cake slices, "grandpa doesn't have one yet, and neither do I", your oldest said, "Oh, and you and daddy, too", she noticed.

"Good catch, sweetheart", you smiled, cutting back the pieces and asking for help to make sure the plates reached who they needed to reach. The parry was small and gathered both of your families to celebrate your little girl's first birthday.

Sitting next to your mother, you ate some of the cake and looked at the table. Both families got along really well and you were very grateful that you had the opportunity to give this close family time and environment to your kids.

"Do you want some cake, Margot?", you cooed, smoothing down her dress as she beamed at the fork with the sweet food.

Lance smiled and helped Margot straighten her back against his front, grabbing her bib so she wouldn't make a big mess.

You were feeding her the cake when Chloe asked where you kept the kitchen towells, "can you go show her, please? She won't find it otherwise", Lance encouraged, knowing where you kept them and how explaining it would confuse her more.

"It's like a secret door", you sister in-law chuckled, taking the cloth she was looking for, "yes, at first we didn't know what to put there because it's in such a weird and fiddly place, but this seems to work", you added as you walked back to the living area, hearing laughs from everyone.

Right by the spot where you had sat in, Margot had gotten her hands on one of the colourful cupcakes, tiny fingers scooping some of the lavender coloured whipped cream and painting her father's face with it, Addalynn giggling loudly too, "you're looking funny, daddy!".

As you walked closer to them, you smiled as her little chubby hands flew to cover her sister's cheeks and then your own, your reflexes allowing you to lick her finger just before she smeared it on your face, giggling at the feeling of your tongue in her fingers.

"Is that yummy, sweet cheeks?", you asked, grabbing a napkin to clean her hands up, Lance doing the same to himself and Addalynn after your mother snapped a picture.

"Can you believe we have a one year old and a five year old?", Lance said once the girls went to play in the living room with the rest of the guests, helping you starting to clean up the table.

"It seems like it was yesterday when we left Dr. Marlin's office with embryos on your tummy and so much hope for a little one, and then there came Addalynn, and now Margot", he smiled, kissing your forehead, "it's been a journey, but I wouldn't so it with anyone else", he smiled.

"Me neither", you hugged his waist, looking at the way everyone chatted together and played, "Oh no, Scotty and your dad are getting a manicure from Addalynn", you giggled, "your father is getting his hair done by Margot, I'm not sure which one is worse", Lance playfully bit back, "Oh, definitely my dad, look at how Margot is pulling on his hair - c'mon, darling, it's painful just to watch", you cringed.

(Thank you for submitting an ask ✨️)

[kingshovelbug]

forrest!! SOS!! i have no good food to eat!! ik u can cook so can u tell us some yummy recipes?

oh god i feel like senshi because im so so very late to this ask because ive been in a slump with cooking myself and youve definitely eaten by now. BUT i have a few that i make either when i want comfort food that still checks some boxes of being kind of nutritious or that are just fast

i. spam musubi but its not actually

spam musubi are these awesome hand held things. sometimes they have egg sometimes they dont but i will eat a whole can worth in one go. so i do it as a bowl instead

i start jasmine rice in our rice cooker and chop the spam into cubes vs slices like it would be for musubi. fry them on medium high until theyre crispy. then ill julienne an onion and add it to the spam. once the onion is starting to soften ill add the sauce. the recipe i saw was 2tbsp soy sauce, 1 tbsp mirin with like a spoon full of sugar (honestly it was probably just under a tbsp) but ive been cheating recently and using a japanese bbq sauce i found at our local asian grocery store. once everything is coated i cook it a few mins so the sauce thickens up. by then the rice should be done and then you just take a scoop of each and i add seaweed on top

i know its not proper but since will doesnt like the sweet savory combo and im the only one eating it this way is easier for me to handle. i can store the rice and spam separately so nothing gets mushy and even refry the spam when i want to heat it back up

ii. black bean, pepper and cheese quesadilla

this is actually how i got will to try beans. i just take a can of black beans and dump the whole thing into a pot and cook on medium until i can smash them. ill also fry peppers and onions on medium until they have a little char. spices are honestly up to you and how spicy you want it. i usually put salt, pepper, cumin, paprika, chili powder and garlic in with the beans. once the beans are mostly smashed and the peppers cooked ill throw them together and smash them more just so everything is easier to spread onto a tortilla. that plus you can add your cheese. ive shredded my own and used grocery store mixes so its up to you!

iii. spicy garlic tofu

almost no notes on this. i use less maple syrup than the recipe calls for so 1tbsp of everything in the sauce. and instead of gochujang i use a chinese chili paste, imo it ends up less ketchup flavored but if you like ketchup then just use gochujang

iv. https://thecookiewriter.com/roasted-mushroom-pot-pie/

i dont make this as often but this is a recipe i use as a base and then cheat. i swap in frozen veggies and it speeds everything up

v. hotpot

i love making hotpot at home. its super easy skill wise it just takes some time. you can buy premixed hot pot bases from the grocery store if you have an asian grocery store near you and you just dunk stuff in the soup until its cooked. you just need to watch out for the spice level of the broth

will and i will usually get thinly sliced beef, rice cakes, udon noodles, fish cakes, bok choy and mushrooms. all you do is bring the broth to a boil and cook your ingredients. sometimes i dunk with chopsticks other times i cook with a small strainer lol

[chubbycelebs]

Our Changing Bodies (part 1)

I was never one to eat big, to fill my belly to the brim, to feel my stomach push up against my clothes swelling forward with my greed, but one christmas this changed.

Me and my boyfriend were quite slim and fit people. I was skinnier than he was, him sporting a little softness to his middle and thicker thighs and backside. I looked skinny with very little muscle and little to no fat on my body. We enjoyed our bodies though. We loved exploring each other’s bodies and supported each other in whatever changes we wanted to make.

It was a quiet evening with my boyfriend a few days before christmas day. We decided we wanted to trial run making a christmas dinner before we made it for the whole family. We spend hours slaving over the stove top and oven crafting up the most amazing roast dinner we could cook up. We plated all the food up and sat down at the table. The table was filled to the brim with so much good food; big toast chicken, pigs in blankets, yorkshire puddings, cauliflower cheese, stuffing, roasted vegetables, mash potatoes and roast potatoes. We made enough for a family but just for the two of us. We thought we could have some left overs to get it through till christmas.

We dug right in. Our plates pilled high with all the yummy food we had just made. We started shovelling the food into our mouths, hardly talking to each other as we were just so focused on eating this lovely food we just made. I couldn’t stop eating it. The rich gravy that covered all the food tied it all together and made it impossible the resit. I was eating slightly quicker than my boyfriend which was unusual as he always had the bigger appetite. Before I knew it I had polished off my first plate full. I was still hungry so I went back for seconds. I piled my plate just as high as I did the first time. Soon after me my boyfriend followed now onto his second plate too. I stuffed my face full of the roast, enjoying every bite. I began to feel my belly distend. I could feel the button on the top of my jeans slightly dig into my bloated gut. My shirt started to cling to my stomach. I wasn’t full yet though so I kept eating my second plate full. I looked over at my handsome boyfriend who did a little wiggle in his chair and re-adjusted the top of his jeans. I could tell he was nice and full too. He however stopped here throwing in the towel and pushing his plate aside. “I’m absolutely stuffed” he said rubbing his gut. I giggled at him as I kept stuffing my mouth full of food. I finished my second plate whilst looking over at my boyfriends half finished plate. I couldn’t let that food go to waste. “Pass it here” I said holding my hand out. My boyfriend was taken a back by this. Never had he ever seen me eat this much before. He passed it me and watched me dig into the left overs. He watched in shock as I polished off my third plate of food. As I cleaned the plate with a yorkshire pudding and popped it into my mouth and reached down to my jean button. It was digging very uncomfortably into my bloated belly. I slide a finger behind my jeans and popped the button open. I groaned and sank into my seat allowing my bloated gut to fully expand. “Hungry were ya” my boyfriend asked cleaning the plates and giving my belly a little pat. This prompted a little burp to slip out as I huffed in discomfort. “I’m assuming you won’t be wanting my little treat then” just then my boyfriend pulls out a chocolate cake from the fridge. He always did this. He loves baking and would surprise me with his baked goods. Before today I was able to always eat a small slice and give him the rest of it that I didn't finish, but something was different today.

He cut me a thick slice and him an equally thick slice. He placed the plate in front of me and my momentary fullness suddenly stopped making me devour the whole slice. I didn’t stop once just eating the whole chocolaty slice of cake, so rich and thick the perfect chocolate cake. This time though my boyfriend had beaten me in finishing my slice. He was already up slicing two new slices of the cake for us to eat. As I polished off my first slice i was immediately met with my second. I jumped right into it trying my hardest to finish it off. My boyfriend finished his off quickly again and then came and sat next to me. My fullness had come back to me and there was no way I could finish off this slice of cake. My boyfriend took the fork off me and started loading it up. He put the fork to my lips looking at me with devilishly sexy eyes. I opened my mouth as he filled it with chocolate cake. I obeyed to his doing till the very last of my slice was done. I didn’t even notice that my boyfriend’s hand was circling my belly rubbing it gently, slightly pulling my shirt up. It revealed my very bloated slightly hairy belly. I was groaning with how full I was. My legs spread far apart as my gut pushed forward. My boyfriends hands slipped down onto my jeans. He pushed the zip down and started rubbing my cock. I was moaning louder and louder. As he was starting to get faster with it, he got up and grabbed another slice of cake. “Please no mor-“ He didn’t even listen just stuffed the slice into my mouth. I groaned as all I could do was swallow the beautiful cake filling my belly more. He made me sit there till I licked off every bit of chocolate from his fingers. I sucked sensually on his fingers making sure i swallowed every bit of chocolate.

He got up from the chair and pulled off his clothes leaving him in just his boxers. His soft (and much hairier then mine) middle was very bloated too. I could see the fat boy he could become. His thick thighs ass and big shoulders complimented his swollen belly well. “Strip for me” he whispered. I struggled to pull off my tight shirt but I did. My jeans fell to my ankles as I stood up. My belly was just as big as his just less soft. I walked up to my boyfriend till our big bellies touched. He grabbed me by the waist and pulled me in closer. I could feel my self sinking into his fat. He kissed my so passionately, like it was the first kiss we ever shared. His hands moved over my skinny frame but settled on my swollen gut. He rubbed it feeling the round shape of it. Never had we done this before, but it excited me. His hands got lower slipping under my boxers. He rubbed my cock making me moan and my knees start to buckle. He pulled my boxers down and as he did he went down kissing my chest, upper belly, belly button and lower gut till he got to the sweet spot. He was sucking me so sensually I wouldn’t help but fall back onto the table. He sucked harder and harder and as he did he rubbed my belly making me belch between moans. He started trying to shake my gut with very little movement. As he rubbed my gut he stuck a finger into my belly button and something inside my cock twitched. It felt so amazing for him to treat my gut with such love. As he pinched the little fat i had on my stomach I began to come so much into his mouth. I filled his cheeks and grabbed his hair as I moaned loudly, louder then ever before. He came up wiping his face of my sweet seed. Now motivated to give him the best climax, I switched positions pushing him against the table. The cake was on reaching distance. I had a hunch he was into stuffing so I gave him what he wanted. I grabbed a handful of the cake and pushed it into his mouth. My other hand pulled down his boxers and started playing with his insanely hard cock. I was grabbing handful after handful of his rich chocolate cake. “You won’t finish till that whole cake is gone”. He began to eat the cake faster and faster. As he ate the last mouthful I moved my hand over to his much bigger belly. I played with his chubbiness feeling it shake leaving chocolate smears all over it. “Good boy” I whispered as I made him explode all over my bloated belly. We both collapsed onto the floor. I laid in his arms trying to catch my breathe. I looked down at both of our bloated bodies. I saw his belly covered in chocolate and decided to lick him clean. I licked every inch of his body clean of chocolate filling me up even more. He rolled over to face me and me him, our bellies pushing against each other on the floor. We didn’t say anything but the look of lust in his eyes said everything. I knew what he wanted and I was going to give it him

New series started!! Hope you guys enjoy this story. Cant wait to get the next part out to you guys. This story feels very close to my heart and my life so I hope you guys resonate with it. :)