#I'm definitely a lesbian

[catsconflictscopicsandchamomile]

had the opposite of this. best friend of SEVERAL years, we were both exploring our genders, he was already out as queer/effeminate but was wondering how far it went, I was convinced I was a trans guy (not... not quite... yes dysphoria, not gender-related) and still thought I was bi, we tried dating and it was like

the dumbest thing ever

we were SO cuddly/stealing-each-other's-clothes close as friends that everyone thought we were dating already, but as soon as we tried to ACTUALLY date (so, as a gay/nb couple) it was like

*sitting awkwardly on opposite sides of a couch like its the 1910s*

...anyway he's a VERY femme he/they queer nb ambiguousness w at least a few past relationships/flings

I'm an ace butch lesbian with some possible, vague genderfuckery (yeah the dysphoria was abt sexuality. apparently had to try EVERY GENDER before realizing that the gender wasnt the issue) who has yet to ask a girl out or even ask for a girl's number without squeaking and stuttering like a broken Fur Real Friend(tm)

...and we're still best friends

As a lesbian, it’s happened twice already that one “guy” stands out to me and I think “huh maybe they’re kinda cute and interesting, I wanna get to know them” and then I get to know them better and it’s a closeted trans girl who I somehow sniffed with my little nonbinary lesbian nose

[chameleonsallinvermillion]

Normally by this point, dashboard osmosis has given me a rough idea what everybody's latest Thing is. But Dungeon Meshi? I have no idea what is going on with Dungeon Meshi. My best guesses so far are: -

There probably is a literal dungeon that they are in at least some of the time

Food???? Cooking??? Cooking competition?????????

Very possibly lesbians

That one guy who is taller than everyone else

????????????

It's also highly possible that some of the things I'm assuming are Dungeon Meshi related are actually Locked Tomb, because I never figured out what that was about either.

[i-am-a-fish-in-this-univers]

Chat too often I find myself thinking, "man I need the (insert sun character) to my (insert moon character I ship them with), and then I realize just how sad and gay that makes me sound.(I am both sad and gay)

[marzipanandminutiae]

as a woman who grew up with an emotionally abusive mother constantly telling me I needed to wear more makeup/more revealing clothing/date (boys) more/go out to "normal" parties more, I despise "she should be at the club"

god forbid some people- especially young women, who already have to deal with a thousand different behavioral standards from a thousand different directions -not have the same dreams and desires for their lives as you do for yours

fucking hell. the correct response to "women should stay at home and have kids and be submissive wives" prescriptivism was not MORE PRESCRIPTIVISM

(I also just saw a poll asking if people partied as teenagers, and OP responded that the answers were "killing them" because No was winning. like? why is everyone so personally invested in other people having a very specific kind of fun?)

[nighttimenothings]

if any femmes need help zipping up their dress, clasping a necklace or bracelet—y'know, the usual—or even the opposite, i offer my services for the low, low price of 2 kisses per hour!

[elysianmadness]

"Lesbian means exclusive attraction to women!"

"No, it means non-men exclusively attracted to non-men!"

"It actually means queer attraction to women!"

"Lesbian means women and nonbinary people being exclusively attracted to other women and nonbinary people!"

Lesbian is a multifaceted label that can describe many different experiences. There is no one perfect definition of lesbian that will encompass the entire diverse experiences that lesbians can have.

I'm personally a genderqueer woman who's exclusively attracted to other women, but the lesbian next to me might be a transmasc lesbian who loves all genders except for men. And the lesbian next to them might be a bigender lesbian who's both a girl and a boy, who's exclusively attracted to women. Our experiences can all be described by the term lesbian if that's how we wish to describe it, but we might define it differently based on our own experiences. And guess what?

None of our definitions are wrong, but none of our definitions will encompass every other lesbian's experiences. A word can have multiple definitions without any of the definitions being wrong. And those definitions can be very vague or very specific. Labels are made to fit us- we aren't made to fit labels.

People who may have a different experience with the lesbian label are not your enemies. People in lesbian spaces who aren't exactly like you are not your enemies. The problem comes when you try to force one singular definition on every single lesbian. THAT is harmful. Sending death threats to other lesbians because they don't have the same experience as you is harmful. Not another lesbian having a different experience from you.

[baravaggio]

Nana x "Where is My Place in the World? Early Shōjo Manga Portrayals of Lesbianism" by Fujimoto Yukari (tr. Lucy Fraser)

[lesbianinaginkgoforest]

It's leash your service top trans girl and bite their neck tuesday

[gideonisms]

I also love people who are not quite sure if they count as lesbians due to the ever-changing definitions of gender and sexuality but who do have lesbian problems and lesbian relationship dynamics and who get weird looks from straight guys but also sometimes from other gay people and who can't really put into words exactly what they are because that's not exactly the point but it might be nice if it was easier to explain but it is what it is

[luzsadventures]

coming straight from my three page long notes app essay I wrote at 4am after seeing the barbie movie, some thoughts on why barbie is definitely aroace, and why that means the world to me tbh:

BARBIE IS AROACE. TELL ME IM WRONG.

barbie not wanting to be with ken is so important. she never has to explain herself. she’s just not interested. and that’s okay. she’s never shamed or ostracized because she’s not interested in ken. it's not played for jokes. there’s never even a moment of “well, maybe barbie will have a realization that ken's been there all along and they'll end up together”. nope, there’s never any expectation. and it’s not even in a girlboss feminism, “she doesn’t need a man” kind of way. she just doesn’t want that, and the movie respects that. the movie respects what she wants, which is something we don't see much when it comes to aroace rep (or like most rep when it comes to women tbh).

barbie also turns down ken in a way that makes it clear that she's just not interested. there's no hesitation or sugar coating to it. we see this in the "girls night" scene in front of the dreamhouse, when barbie says simply, she doesn't want ken there. even later on when she turns him down in ways that are a little nicer, she's still very firm in her decision. time and time again we see barbie knowing what she wants and asserting it. we live in a world where when turning down men women always feel the need to be nice about it and "let them down easy" either out of being polite or sometimes as a safety precaution. regardless, to see barbie be able to be firm in her decisions is so empowering.

I love how this subverts expectations, bc we know ken is (supposed to be) barbie’s boyfriend. she’s everything and he’s just ken (although we can get into the nuances of that statement some other time). that is the role ken has always played. so to have that subverted, to make it clear to begin with that barbie is not really all that into ken is such a nice change.

this is also SO important because barbie is a beacon of “stereotypical” femininity, and has also been historically sexualized. so the fact that the movie lets her be feminine and girly but she can still not be interested in ken is amazing. she is still allowed to be herself, and her femininity is neither tied to, nor does it detract from her want to not be with ken. the movie said girls can be feminine without being tied to male attention !! girls can be feminine just bc its fun !!

I can talk about this for hours it’s so genuinely healing for me. I doubt many others picked up on it, hell idk that this all was intentional, but I loved it <3

[adustoflove]

I always think well if I dated a man, I wouldn't feel as insane. I wouldn't feel so awful or jealous. And then I remember why I came to the conclusion that I'm a lesbian. I just wouldn't care if it were a man. I just can't bring myself to care about men like that 😔😩😭

[pokimoko]

Hello!! i just discovered your blog and firstly i wanna say that your art is gorgeous! <33 and secondly, if youre still taking requests could i get a lesbian/non binary cheetah? /nf

Thank you! Cheetahs be upon ye!

[2pen2wildfire]

"Transmascs can be lesbians but not trans men!" Ah yes because there's definitely a measurable, quantifiable difference between a trans man and a transmasc. It's not like people have their own life experiences and use the labels they feel comfortable with or anything. Not like someone might have a complicated relationship with womanhood and the sapphic experience while still fully identifying as a man. Definitely never a thing that happens. Jesus christ be so fucking fr.

[esoteric-apparition]

Anti mspec mono people know that mspec doesn't always mean "attraction to men and women" right. I mean obviously other queer people understand that labels can be complex and have multiple definitions. RIGHT??

[enixamyram]

Okay, this has been bothering me for a while because despite having so many people blocked and so many things muted, I'm still seeing a lot of anti complaints. So:

When, exactly, does Andrealphus "flirt" with Stella?

I keep seeing "criticism" that he's supposed to be gay but he keeps flirting with Stella, or that the shows pushing an incest joke with him and his sister or yadda yadda ya- Bullshit. Nothing that he does can legitimately be called flirting.

Andrealphus brings up Stella being attractive for one of two reasons. To insult her or to brag to others about his family being in some way better than others.

Whenever he calls her attractive, it is in the same sentence of either implying or all out saying that her looks are all she has going for her. He constantly refers to her or even straight up calls her stupid to her face and I can't remember the last time saying someone was dumb was the same as flirting with them.

Or he'll refer to her looks to others as another way of bragging about his family (note; he rarely refers to her by name and instead says "my sister", a manipulative tactic that constantly relates her positive points back to him somehow). Even this is insulting her though as, again, as far as he's concerned all she has is her looks and nothing else. That's why it's the only thing he talks about. In his mind, Stella is nothing but a pretty face and so when he talks about her, he needs to remind everyone about her one good quality as another ego boost for his relation to her.

Is it still creepy the way he talks about her? A bit, sure. Is it as creepy as some people make out/undermine him as a gay man? Not even a little.

[weaponizedmoth]

Hook sketch.