#I’ve missed him what can I say
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He’s at the beach with Andrew
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the gorgug-porter conversation is interesting to me because like. yea for the overwhelming majority of the conversation porter’s being shitty & trying to fit gorgug into a box that gorgug just does not fit into by trying to make gorgug’s relationship with his rage more focused on the aggression aspect of it. but then there’s also this specific thing that brennan brought up again in the ap, which is that gorgug’s relationship with his rage is wholly “this is a tool i use to protect my friends.” which isn’t a bad thing! but that’s his Whole relationship with it, & gorgug seems to place next to no value on his rage in relationship to himself. which is problematic, because it’s first & foremost his rage.
being raised in a household with a sort of toxic positivity largely meant that, whether or not it was his parents’ intention, gorgug internalized the message that more traditionally “negative” emotions such as anger are the wrong response to something. part of the reason he prioritizes his artificing is probably because it’s “fixing” things. in comparison to being a barbarian, which gorgug associates with “breaking” things. good vs. bad behavior, in his eyes.
it’s a totally unacceptable bar to measure a 16 y/o by, but i do think part of porter’s reasoning for not letting gorgug multiclass is him recognizing that gorgug generally does not value anger as a valid emotional response to something, at the very least for himself. & that directly conflicts with what being a barbarian is, because whether you like it or not, that rage is what fuels you. but again, barring a kid from pursuing something they deeply care about in part (not entirely, porter has a lot of more bullshit reasons) because of their fundamental values & world outlook is crazy.
so yes, 98% of porter’s reasoning is pretty shitty, immature, rife with a toxic view that there’s only one proper way to access rage, & generally not a good thing to do as a teacher, but also within that reasoning is the 2% of ‘there is a fundamental part of yourself that you only value if you can use it to take care of other people & you need to accept that as something that can take care of you, too.’ but that’s something to discuss with a therapist or a guidance counselor, not something that should hugely impact gorgug’s academic future.
#gorgug thistlespring#fantasy high#dimension 20#fhjy#fhjy spoilers#btw these r just my personal opinions u r 100% free to disagree#gorgug & his rage interest me so deeply because of how deeply that rage existing seems to be against gorgug’s own will#like mechanically classes are choices & you can switch stuff around any time. but gorgug as a barbarian always felt like an unwilling choice#like that 14 y/o kid did not want to have rage. & that really interests me.#i’ve seen people before be like ‘what if gorgug dropped barbarian & went full srtificer’ but i feel like that simply can’t happen??#mechanically yea sure but it always felt like a core part of gorgug that the rage will always be there & it’s a matter of how you channel it#idk. dnd classes narratively being treated as ‘you can not lose this part of you’ even though you technically can#gorgug could be lvl 19 artificer & he’d still have 1 level of barbarian. because that is part of who he is.#btw i don’t think porter truly cares about gorgug valuing his rage only as a way to be a human shield#i think porter just sees that as ‘wrong’ but like. not as in ‘you need to take care of yourself’ & more ‘you aren’t conforming’#he thinks it’s wrong for the wrong reasons. the nastier ‘this is how you should be’ reasons#ppl being like ‘we r being too hard on porter. it’s an 150% courseload gorgug will be overwhelmed’ i think r missing the point bc like.#that is 100% a valid reason to not approve gorgug for multiclassing! but that’s also 100% not the reason porter rejected him.#that whole interaction was basically porter shoving his percieved version of conformity down gorgug’s throat. was v neurodivergent kid coded#no hate to anyone saying that last point btw these r all just opinions#thinking about last ep wilma & digby being like ‘you’re a great barbarian. you’re so great at it. but look at what you made!!!’ like.#they would never mean it like that. but when you only understand half of your son he is going to prioritize the half you do.
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American-validated Frenchge 🥖
transcript below
[Video Transcript begins:
[Video starts mid-sentence]
Etoiles: —and you put this face— next to the camera! Like this!
Foolish: (laughing) You’re so French!
Etoiles: I’m so French, that’s my main problem. Like I’m so French, I try sometimes to nerf myself and be like, less French
Etoiles: But that feels good to hear this because you say I’m so French and like, some racist people in France think I’m not because I’m Arabic too, so—
Foolish: Ohhhh
Etoiles: —that feels good too, you know
Foolish: No dude, you seem like a French ass French person—
Etoiles: (laughing)
Foolish: I don’t know how else to put it. Simply put
Etoiles: That feels good, man. I was saying hello to Tarik and all his chat was saying like Frenchge, the emote they are putting—
Foolish: Oh yeah
Etoiles: —the emote they are putting. Yeah, yeah, yeah
Video Transcript ends.]
#foolish gamers#etoiles#étoiles#be like foolish . don’t be racist ❤️#god when etoiles first showed up on screen he fucken leaped at foolish to hug him it was so <33 missed them and tinza soso much#mostly wanted to clip this because etoiles saying ‘that’s my problem i’m so french’ is exactly what he said to rae during his first stream#ever with the roomies and co streamers over a year ago now . and that was the stream that kinda kickstarted his english streams forever so#it was an awww moment for me :)#though i thought hey its also useful to clip bc etoiles doesn’t really make mention of the racism he deals with when hes doing english#content . in part i suppose bc much of it is inherently linked with the french sociopolitical scene which isn’t particularly accesible to#anglophones . but since i’ve seen some erm . ignorant takes sometimes over the past year and months i think it Could do some people good to#actually hear about the shit he deals with . like he gets the ‘go back to your country’ type shit too yknow it was especially bad during the#french elections this past summer#it is crazy tho how racist politicians can debate the validity of your nationality back home while foreigners if you spend time among them#in their country will wholly accept you and your nationality with it#5/11/24
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just remembered a wip i had which was jay at uni meeting normal people and desperately trying to act cool and normal whilst internally screaming about being in a whole new place with all new people and not having his gang with him
#i only wrote one scene where jay meets one of his flatmates#and he’s trying to make casual normal conversation & asks her who her parents are#bc that has always mattered! on the isle or at auradon prep your parentage was also a Conversation Starter#and the girl is just like ……what. why do you want to know that#but she tells him and jay makes it into a joke like hehe oh yes i met them at a soirée once. amazing company#and the girl is like ok who are YOUR parents. knowing full well who he is#and jay says that his dad fosters puppies. and the girl says that sounds like a good life and he’s like ohhh just the BEST#i really. love exploring jay at uni i’ve written a couple of things i’ve never finished#like!!! for the first time for years he’s well and truly all alone!!!!#and at least the isle & ap had similarities. uni is just full of very normal people who don’t particularly give a shit#and jay who is like THE guy who cares about everything so much all the time and how people are reacting to him and he’s desperately trying+#to be so cool and unbothered whilst trying not to revert to his isle tactics regarding people who may be threats#just. being somewhere so so new. with no one he knows. everyone else is so far away. and jay is missing his gang like he’d miss+#his body parts. and it’s like. jays always buried his own emotions & hurt so he can better protect his gang#and now he has no gang to protect#and he is just laid absolutely bare. and also constantly stressing about not being there for the others#i just think he’d have an absolutely awful start to uni <3#descendants#jay son of jafar
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Oh look, another art piece-
He a little confused, but he got the spirit
WOO! After getting confirmation on details about the character, I finally allowed myself to draw this! It was originally going to be a mini comic, but I just decided to draw the last panel with a lot more detail.
Blue belongs to @creatively-cosmic. They have an Ask Blog by the name of @themissingnumbers, so go check them out! Their content is great!
Aster belongs to me.
[Extras and whatnot below the cut!]
[Extra Bonus!:
If you actually looked under the cut, you get to be blessed with a little nugget of information about Aster!
Aster doesn’t know jack about sexuality or gender identity (don’t worry, he’s learning!) But what he does know are the colors! Aster can tell you what colors or flag represents which sexuality/gender—but he couldn’t actually tell you about them. He doesn’t know what each of them mean.
Lots of people in his life and around his home have little desk flags or wear pins with different gender identities or sexuality’s on them, so he knows that it isn’t a bad thing. He thinks all the colors are pretty and unique and should be supported and celebrated!]
[Also, for those curious, here’s the symbolism for each flower. I wasn’t the most confident in drawing some of them, but I did my best to pick good ones!:
Blue Morning Glory: Encouragement, Power, Enduring Love
Pink Roses: Appreciation, Recognition, Happiness
White Daffodil: Rebirth, Good Fortune, Resilience.]
#This took all of my energy for today lmao-#I’m so happy that i could draw this after the idea was chilling in my head for the better part of a month#I know we haven’t met him yet In Missing Numbers#but I had to#Plus he’s my second favorite#Had to make up for all the Fire fanart somehow haha#Please excuse any mistakes in the actual art I’m running on hopes and dreams over here-#My wrist hurts but I’ll be okay#The art is worth it! and so is Blue!#Also yes the art name is a pun#EDIT: went back and fixed some coloring mistakes everything should be good now :)#Aster is an ally#He will be your friend no matter who or what you are#Everyone is a potential friend to Aster!#(He just so happens to get along the best with any Blue variants he comes across-)#(What can he say—It’s programmed in him.)#[I just realized that I’ve unintentionally made Aster a way to interact with the main cast of Missing Numbers-]#[Whoops!]
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I left my purse at the restaurant and my classmate had to drive me back and he said he didn’t mind because we could spend more time together and I wanted to say I agreed but I’m so socially stunted that I could only dumbly titter
#putting my head through a plate glass window#all through dinner and drinks and second drinks I was looking at him like I want to kid you I want you to kiss me I want to hug you and kis#and then he jokes that he’ll have to kidnap me to spend more time with me and I can just go ha ha hm.#god I feel like a moron like#I agree!!! please let’s just keep driving!!!!#but I am apparently scared of intimacy!!!!!! for no good reason!!!!!!#I think he likes me. he said he wants to spend more time together to watch our movie list. even if we can’t. because we have no place to#watch them. but man. I could not say anything intelligent at the end. also I’m tired which didn’t help.#if I were different person I would have tried to kiss him I’m sure.#I’ve literally never been like this before. I missed what he said a couple times because I was just looking at him like hmmm my head would#fit so well on your shoulder right there and I’d put my face in your neck and kiss your check and then#man anyway. I’m such a fucking moron.#I should just text and confess my stupidity. but then I’m afraid I’ve completely misread the situation#aaaaaaaaa#I think this would be easier if either of us had an apartment to have a more private conversation in
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I got an email from my grandpa today and all the draft responses I’ve been working on in my head sound like an 18th century letter that’s going to have to travel for months to reach him.
pandemic year 5 really has me feeling like me and a very small handful of people I know are living on an entirely different plane of existence than everyone else
#like I haven’t seen him in over a year. I’ve seen him 3 times since 2020#so I guess on the isolation and slow communication front it’s pretty similar#he used my chosen name. I haven’t changed my email yet but he used my chosen name#I don’t even care at this point if he never gets my pronouns right#I thought I’d never be able to tell him. I didn’t want to find out his politics were more important#he’s quiet and kind and he gives people expensive gifts any time he can afford it but he constantly forgets people’s allergies#so he might get you something you can’t have but whoever you pass it along to will love it#he cries at weddings and during church services and sometimes random holidays#he passes out in his rocking chair at every family function#he’s the unofficial photographer of every gathering ever since my great grandfather stopped being able to walk as much as the job requires#and he voted for trump in 2016 and has afaik an active nra membership#he once complimented my outfit by telling me he’d call me a stud if I was a guy#which like. ok. I have some notes#but uh. thanks?#idk I’m just. it sucks being so far away from everyone and everything because the rest of the world is ignoring an ongoing pandemic#I’m missing so much of my life and others lives and even parts of my own transition#I can make steps to reach out but it only goes so far if poeple#are unwilling to mask or vaccinate or even just ask what needs to happen to make it safe#so I don’t. idk. kill my partner#or become even more disabled than I currently am#my family’s been making steps and they’re taking me seriously but it’s all so slow and I’m still sore from bracing for rejection#I’ve been bracing for rejection for so so long it’s terrifying to reach out. about anything#this is not condusive to a healthy relationship lol#not sure what to do other than bonk myself on the head and say ‘get better’ tho#*bonk* ‘try again’#one step at a time ig#ahshitherewegoagain.jpg#.txt
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i won’t screenshot the dms bc i don’t feel like opening the latest message but EYE posted on my story abt the tiktok pictured below basically about how i got horny thinking abt someone working through a difficult math problem lol don’t worry abt that anyway sam slides up bc i cut part of it out so as to avoid insta censors and my slight embarrassment lol and was like does that say c*m and i was like well yes and then he was like haha what you’re into math… girl u have to walk w the thought process 😑 which i know you’re incapable of anyway so i vaguely responded like ah yeah what being away from stem for so long will do to u and he responds with like ten messages. including. ‘you gotta do it yourself’ that’s not the point 🙄 ‘you know how i’m terrible at talking to women’ wow really ‘so i realized i can calculate the speed of cum’ ‘bc i have some data’ DID I ASK?????!???!?!!!?!!!!! hello there’s oversharing and then there’s this… does the girl you’re having sex with know you share to this extent. and then he said how he accidentally brought this up to someone irl to be like haha awk whoops and i was like yeah well there r times where perhaps we need to self censor. and then i also get a message that’s like ‘hang on im doing the math’ IM NEVER EVER EVER GONNA BE ATTRACTED TO U I HOPE U KNOW THAT SCREAAMMMMM (and u need to know bc he’s genderfluid. im only using one set of pronouns for clarity on here ok i promise im not a dick. but he thinks he’s like. an exception for lesbians basically… like he doesn’t Count…. and like look im no essentialist im all for like freaky gender sex but also at so many other turns you do take advantage of being seen as a white male so. i don’t. yeah.) he’s kind of like the creepy dude at the edge of the friend group in high school named matt who would constantly harass me and my ex but like tried to be so lowk abt it. and it’s so bad basically. ‘17mph is crazy’ i hope you fall in an intersection sorry i can’t do this anymore 😵💫😵💫😵💫😵💫😵💫😵💫😵💫😵💫😵💫😵💫 so pissed i have to see him tmrw i should be able to watch mmxxl w scully in peace
#like. WHAT possesses a person to say all this#it’s not like i’ve never talked abt sex stuff w sam or friends i mean look at my major and shit we’re watching we’re all adults here#but like HUUUUHHHHH???? on my silly little story about wanting to watch someone do calc or some shit… shut up…#it’s actually insufferable and i need u all to know. it has not always been to#like. this egregiously bad. certainly there are some flags i missed over time even when we first met maybe but he was significantly#more chill last year.. at least as far as i interacted w him. this is like. yeah idk#and just any time we’re together in person now he launches into whatever is on his mind or he’s up to at that moment what happened to hello#how are you etc. not that i can even like stand conversation esp like. dude we haven’t talked since the day we recorded the podcast#assignment which was also egregious. why would you start off like this. hello#abby talks#i hope his other roommate like beats him up or something. wont happen but well#AND more importantly. do i wear a mini skirt tmrw if i’m seeing roommate#we’re supposed to but we were also hoping to hang outside and now it’s gonna rainnnn but we’ll see#i don’t usually go for a cunty little fit on a monday. but i could. AND i get to go to class a half hour late
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ayyyyyyy I set up an appointment for medication this Friday (telemedicine but whatever) and I get to see my former therapist again later this month. I’m kind of excited. More than kind of. Little sad, but I’m lonely and want to talk to someone. He’s a real cool dude. I’m a little worried to trauma dump the last 6 months on him, but whatever, it beats sitting there for an hour feeling like I’m wasting his time and struggling to think of things to say. dang dang dang, I’m excited.
#I’m excited to tell him about my mom’s transplant. less so to mention all my dark moments since we last spoke.#ok so I gotta wait a week for antidepressants and then a couple of weeks for them to take effect#that’s a lot of waiting#especially with how rough I’ve been these last couple of weeks#I probably have more appointments I should schedule but we’ll see#I’ve only been able to sleep sitting up#like the dang elephantman#something about laying down freaks me out#it’s uncomfortable and not very restful and just thinking about sleep gives me anxiety#brains are fucky#oof… now it’s setting in. I’ve got an appointment but it’s 5 days away#5 days of… this. anxiety and distraction and my sick brain#this is my fault#well… no. yes. I don’t want to COMPLETELY beat myself up for it#I should have been managing my mental health better instead of waiting until I spiraled out#I should have been managing my health better in general!#this isn’t sexy to say but I hate my body. I’ve run it down. and it’s going to be so much harder getting back to something semi healthy#but I’m trying now 😕 so maybe that’ll count for something#I’ve been realizing that I really really miss going to the gym late at night#that’s what I need now. been doing these little drives at night to distract myself but having an actual place to go would be much better#BUT! too expensive. need to work and make some money. not excited for that but I needs it. I neeeeeeds money. for burgers. and distractions#this is too rambly. I’m sorry. I thought about counseling and got too excited to talk and talk#I talk too much#you can ignore this#text
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18 + swaymark!!
oooo thank you!!
#18 - pleaser, wallows + swaymark
okay i know they are canonically obsessed with each other but. the song is in some ways about feeling like you’re failing in your relationship and being not quite as obsessed with them as they maybe are with you, and in this video of them talking about being a tandem, there is the slightest pause before swayman answers “do you miss him?” that makes me want to probe a wound. we’re not talking irl reasons of how that’s an absurd question (how do you miss him. you’re coworkers you’re seeing each other all the time) we’re talking that maybe this whole goalies-in-love thing got blown out of proportion and now swayman’s having to buy into the bit too hard. linus loves it & everyone’s asking about their bromance & how they love each other so much and the thing is—linus is safe. he’s got a wife and plausible deniability and jeremy? jeremy is gay. sure, he can crack jokes and people-please but the more people ask the more they're going to find out until maybe they find out something jeremy doesn't want them to know. and the longer this goes on, the more jeremy has to sit at linus' dinner table with linus and his beautiful wife and pretend like he isn't a little bit in love with him. and you know what? the longer it goes on and linus doesn't dial it down jeremy does stop being in love with him, because it just feels cruel, until he finally is done enough that he stops biting his tongue and ruins the moment.
#…this so is not a five sentence summary but ALSO this manages to perfectly align with something i was obsessed with (that media video)#like yeah is that pause reasonably a buffering time to a weird question? yes!!! do i want to read into it & make swayman a bit uncomfortabl#also yes!!! sorry i decided to give them tragique but they were assigned by spotify. the other option for this song was an ED fix-it fic#about healthy sex and learning that it can be a part of a normal relationship!! sex is weird and fucked up!! but like. that’s just because#i have always interpreted this song as a) unrequited best friend love & you’re worried you’re gonna fuck it up b) virgin who doesn’t know#what sex is and is scared to tell anyone and then option c) people pleaser keeps going along with it but can’t anymore#also OBVIOUSLY they end up fine. whether that ends up being jeremy finally telling linus (oblivious) i don’t want to do this with you#i need to get over you & them creating a platonic space & sway ends up with someone else OR linus has the oh. true. i simply never#considered that i could be gay for you option OR the one i have just invented but is now my favorite because i love a good polycule is that#linus & his wife simply add jeremy to their relationship. and then this song becomes jeremy scared to have sex with linus’ wife at first lo#liv in the replies#the interviews in that video doing the lord’s work fr but also that ‘do you not miss him’ feels SO uncomfortable. say no! but then he leans#in with the dirty jokes comment & i know i’ve made like eight variations already (sorry. that’s how my brain works) but it is soooo fun#to me personally if they are broken up but now have to act nice & keep doing all these rituals & sell us on the narrative & they’re just#trying to see who’s going to crack first. needle each other into laughing or getting irritated enough it shows through & the other one wins#do even more aggressive hug rituals!! get a medical warning from the athletic training staff!!!#moregraceful
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If I think about Hesh for too long I think I’ll burst into tears. This poor fucking guy. He has to sit helpless while a monster forces his little brother to shoot their dad. All he can do is scream. And when it comes time to kill that monster he barely makes it out alive, and then only thanks to his little brother. And the nightmare is over but it isn’t because the monster cannot die and takes away the only family Hesh has left. He has to sit helpless while the monster drags his little brother away. All he can do is scream.
His story ends bleeding and orphaned and alone.
#ra speaks#cod#call of duty#cod ghosts#call of duty ghosts#david hesh walker#I’m abnormal about an old video game what else is new#*head in hands* I get that it’s a really good set up for a sequel that never came to pass but jfc poor hesh#Riley isn’t even there and that dog is all he has left#(yes yes the other ghosts are alive but they’re not the same kind of family as his father and brother)#we don’t even hear him radio to tell Merrick that fucker survived and took Logan#gosh what do they think when they pick him up - all alone and passed out from blood loss with his last communication saying rorke was dead#(this is ignoring the somehow less sad version where he bleeds out before he can get a pick up)#like fuck given the. everything is it so far a stretch for them to assume logan died in the crash?#and then hesh wakes up asking if they’ve found him yet practically jumping out of his hospital bed to go on a warpath#when he realizes they didn’t know rorke survived and Logan was still missing like *gestures in tragedy enjoyer* this guy#okay I’m normal now (lying)#if I got something wrong no I don’t take criticism I’ve been microwaving this guy in tin foil everything is on fire help
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I don’t think hyeonseong needed to remember dokja’s order to think about him if something goes wrong. I think he’s just always thinking abt dokja
and I love him for that
#Loyal puppy man#going post#Orv#‘Hey can you hit me again? and do it really hard’ kinky#‘no wait. just kill me right now’ UM. I RESCIND THAT LAST STATEMENT.#I don’t remember what his new attribute is how is dokja gonna cheat death this time#HYEONSEONG CHARACTER PROGRESSION FUCKING FINALLY#I’ve missed him…. deprogram your military propaganda boy itll be good for you#‘There is no third option this time’ ok my first instinct was to take him at face value but dokja is always planning and scheming so#maybe he’s just saying that so hyeonseong will make his own third option out of determination.#to teach him to like… not rely on dokja so much#maybe not the best phrasing but I think u get my point#next episode and I’m immediately confirmed right. AWESOME but also#Would have been nice to have delayed that gratification for a bit#let me step into a side character’s pov for a moment instead of having dokja tell me everything#‘I thought you considered me the standard you should strive for. If so then do as I say!’ ‘That’s not the kind of book I want to go by!’#YEAHHHHH HYEONSEONG!!!! MAKE YOUR OWN BOOK! GET THAT CHARACTER GROWTH#‘I see. Well done.’ Dokja you want to be a constellation so bad#It’s already been confirmed tht that’s his goal but it’s been so obvious for a while#Like he keeps putting himself in mentor roles all the time. n constellations aren’t necessarily as close mentors as dokja has been#But they’re still essentially That#WAH HIS HANDS?? HUH???#yeah yeah uh huh I was right dokja was helping hyeonseong learn his lesson on his own also HIS HANDS?????#*HIS ARMS???* GUYS.#‘until the scenario reaches an apocalypse’ bestie ur already in an apocalypse#Ofmy god he has to melt and then cool down a thousand times? what the hell#HUIWON CHARACTER PROGRESSION TOO?? YIPPEE!!!!!#aww a hug……. Even though he must be fucking scorching hot…. How sweet ^_^#and hyeonseong was so polite too he’s such a sweetie#oh I was confused for a second but he literally snuffed the flame! smart
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so like. i still think the writing sucks like half that episode was spent on explaining the cliff hanger from last episode like we do every week. and also once again the characters take a complete sideline to the plot. so i mean i don’t really have much to add critically that i haven’t said already all i’ll say is like i at least had more fun this ep. was it for the right reasons no not really but it made me giggle a lot. very unserious episode. cheng xiaoshi being smart and having a plan reminded me of season 1 and that was the highlight aside from that uhhhhhhgggggg idk my opinions haven’t changed. linking and clicking through the mediocrity of this season ✌🏻
#it’s unfortunate but i don’t have much to say i’ve said it all already#like yeah the writings bad and the character development sucks and the plots boring and drawn out and going nowhere we know#at least it was sillay this week. id prefer if it was good and well written but. i’m taking what i can get#sigh#seeing cheng xiaoshis plan was like the best thing that’s happened this season#it was soooooo season 1 for him to have a plan like that#i miss that shit. god. getting a glimpse of it makes me insane like#YOU CAN WRITE THIS STUFF. YOU CAN. PLEASE. PLEASE GO BACK TO STUFF LIKE THIS#anyway we continue to suffer but we suffer while being goofy as all fuck i guess#link click spoilers#shi guang dai li ren#mine
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Gaslighting? In MY household? It’s more likely than you think
#sad pav hours#<- ‘tis my new vent tag. filter as needed#just pav things#I have experienced so many levels of Confusion today#I mean most of it just boils down to my dad being a dick for no good reason#what do I even do to him????? I yet again ask him this and he’s like#‘I live with you’. My mere existence causes him misery apparently#He says that I’m unlikeable. I say that people generally enjoy my whimsical disposition or just don’t care and ignore me#or in the case of [redacted] try to pacify me in neurotypical ways that only ended up hurting when I found out#instead of communicating that she didn’t want to be friends. Actually that was what my first vent post on here in 2021 was about#and very ironically it was the reason me and Dolphin became friends (random skribbl game my beloved ^^)#But I digress#Also I’ve already accounted for the fact of my future bosses probably disliking me and some people out there just by virtue of being human#but i’d like to believe I’m generally likeable??? I have so much evidence to prove this that the put-down just ends up confusing#Also the amount of name-calling is insane once you stop filtering it out#I can just casually be called stupid. again without any reason#and then people wonder why I have such low self-esteem sometimes#I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m the family scapegoat. I live with 3 blood relatives who hate me.#Also ffs I’M NOT A FREELOADER!!!! STOP sAYING THAT#I understand the real world will be brutal I see the real effects of the cost-of-living crisis every day#I’m prepared to live frugally to survive so stop saying i will be shook 😭 i’m fuckign ready to leave as soon as I have enough savings#and a place to stay. I’m done here. Except for the dogs I will always love and miss them 😭😭😭
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One of my least favorite tropes is when a character says “I’ve never liked/always hated you” to a villainous character but they used to bully that character before they turned bad. And for some reason neither character brings this up during the scene.
#i’m mostly thinking of harvey bullock and ed nygma from gotham and the deep and a-train from the boys#harvey had the nerve to say ‘i never liked you even before you went crazy’ so you were just picking on him for no reason then???#and oh boy the deep/a-train scene don’t even get me STARTED (too late)#‘deep i’ve always hated your ass’ is not the serve you think it is a-train i’m sorry#but as lazy as that line is it’s still better than the godawful monologue the deep gives annie before their fight#like i don’t doubt the deep feels some resentment towards her for trying to ‘ruin him’ or whatever but they didn’t give him good dialogue#instead they just had chace crawford recite a bunch of buzzwords from twitter (‘you tried to CANCEL me but it didn’t work sweetheart’)#like…is that really what the deep would say in that moment? is that really HOW he would say it?#the deep/a-train confrontation was a missed opportunity too!!!#i wish when a-train said that the deep was like ‘yeah i know…? i figured when you were fucking mean to me for years for no reason’#it would’ve felt REAL and PERSONAL#and to see the deep’s mask slip?? he’s always sooo broey and friendly with ppl who clearly hate him#which i guess is a joke about how un-self aware he is but it’d be cool to see him say ‘i know we’re not really friends dude. i just act this#way bc i don’t know how else to be’ it would’ve made the deep more sinister AND more interesting in a few short lines#it would’ve added so much character to the deep gawdddd#get me in that writer’s room so i can save the deep from kripke
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so lps popular remake season 2 episode 8………
#let me talk about my other fixations i beg of thy#noel.txt#spoilers ahead#so so so many thoughts but so little words to say#all I can say is fuck men like Tom he’s so…… GRAGGHGGG…. strangles him#seeing savvys stripped away from what she wants is making me so miserable someone gotta stop the weddding#but omgomgomg coming out scene ABOUT TIME… I’m gonna miss briac I was his ally since he got introduced💥💥#This is the most I’ve ever been invested on a series let alone a L.PS SERIES#I feel like I’m 10 watching the og series
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