#more chill last year.. at least as far as i interacted w him. this is like. yeah idk

[therosevest]

i won’t screenshot the dms bc i don’t feel like opening the latest message but EYE posted on my story abt the tiktok pictured below basically about how i got horny thinking abt someone working through a difficult math problem lol don’t worry abt that anyway sam slides up bc i cut part of it out so as to avoid insta censors and my slight embarrassment lol and was like does that say c*m and i was like well yes and then he was like haha what you’re into math… girl u have to walk w the thought process 😑 which i know you’re incapable of anyway so i vaguely responded like ah yeah what being away from stem for so long will do to u and he responds with like ten messages. including. ‘you gotta do it yourself’ that’s not the point 🙄 ‘you know how i’m terrible at talking to women’ wow really ‘so i realized i can calculate the speed of cum’ ‘bc i have some data’ DID I ASK?????!???!?!!!?!!!!! hello there’s oversharing and then there’s this… does the girl you’re having sex with know you share to this extent. and then he said how he accidentally brought this up to someone irl to be like haha awk whoops and i was like yeah well there r times where perhaps we need to self censor. and then i also get a message that’s like ‘hang on im doing the math’ IM NEVER EVER EVER GONNA BE ATTRACTED TO U I HOPE U KNOW THAT SCREAAMMMMM (and u need to know bc he’s genderfluid. im only using one set of pronouns for clarity on here ok i promise im not a dick. but he thinks he’s like. an exception for lesbians basically… like he doesn’t Count…. and like look im no essentialist im all for like freaky gender sex but also at so many other turns you do take advantage of being seen as a white male so. i don’t. yeah.) he’s kind of like the creepy dude at the edge of the friend group in high school named matt who would constantly harass me and my ex but like tried to be so lowk abt it. and it’s so bad basically. ‘17mph is crazy’ i hope you fall in an intersection sorry i can’t do this anymore 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 so pissed i have to see him tmrw i should be able to watch mmxxl w scully in peace

[ricksanchezsimpaccount]

ok thoughts on the new episode,

SPOILER WARNING obviously

although honestly I don't think I'll be saying anything that others haven't already said haaaaa

anyway finally, a chance for morty's new VA to shine, and GOD does he. I love the way Evil Morty talks, idk why but that bored "uh huh" when Rick tries shooting him several times is soooo funny to me. he killed it and so did ian cardoni (the way he screams "I'LL KILL YOU" after slow mobius' death OOOOOUUUU CHILLS)

i honestly did not expect to see Evil Morty again, and even though I'm kinda sad he didn't get the lasting peace away from Rick that he wanted, he is a DELIGHT to see in action!! i love his interactions w Rick, it's so interesting having a Morty that's on par/better than Rick. although I'll be honest....he kinda feels like a Rick himself, especially w the cybernetic augmentations he also has--at least to me. Wonder if that's going to be brought up again later down the line, something about becoming the monster you fight against i LOVE how we got to see his backstory finally, like others have said I'm really happy that he was just a "normal" Morty. his Rick wasn't anything special. he literally was just a Morty who finally got sick of Rick's shit. i loved the reveal too, bc they DID have me going for a sec there, I thought who we were seeing was OUR morty Indiana Jones Rick 💘💘💘😳😳😳😳😳💦 that's all I'm saying on that And ok, DO I think Rick Prime is dead? like ACTUALLY dead? Honestly...yes. At least I hope so. I think it'd be FAR more compelling for Rick to be like "...now what?" and for the show to actually explore and unpack that, over it being like HAHA SURPRISE RICK PRIME'S NOT ~REALLY~ DEAD you know?

Because yeah. He got his revenge, the revenge he's literally been chasing...basically his entire life, like...since his, what, 30s? And it didn't feel good. It didn't fix things, it didn't make him feel better. He feels as empty as he did before and NOW he doesn't even have a goal to strive towards anymore. There's nothing. And I feel like the ending of the episode did a REALLY good job of portraying that just numbness. He probably fantasized about this moment the WHOLE time and it absolutely didn't live up to it. It wasn't glorious or feel liberating, he just ends up covered in blood and feeling more hollow and broken than before. That's just...kinda how trauma is Morty at first hesitating to touch Rick but eventually hugging him anyway was so sweet ;_; Anyway as for the cinematography of the episode itself...absolutely stellar. Great fights, the SCOPE of everything, the backgrounds and settings, it's wild how much this show has popped off with its animation (it's honestly so funny seeing them stitch in clips from Season 1 in there bc the CONTRAST in animation quality is astounding. its like when artists on twitter do the "my art from 10 years ago vs now" comparisons LOL. LITERALLY, SEASON 1 WAS 10 YEARS AGO). The just dead silence as Rick punches Rick Prime to death (only sounds of course being rick talking and punching), the whole exchange that happened during it, how just downright BRUTAL it was, that entire scene was crafted so well, and others have pointed out the significance of Rick literally beating Prime to death with his bare fists instead of using his tech or weapons or anything, which i feel like was definitely on purpose, and i love man this post ended up longer than i anticipated I'M SORRY. THIS EPISODE DESTROYED ME EMOTIONALLY AND I LOVE WHEN THIS SHOW DOES THAT ✌✨ MY BRAIN'S BEEN BUZZING. IF YOU READ ALL THIS RAMBLING THANKS I GUESS HLFDKSJFH

[lostacelonnie]

Surviving is one thing but befriending the alt girls? Now thats thriving congrats on the friend acquisition. Oh yeah absolutely thats super cool of your mom. To be so chill. More parents should aspire to be so chill. Birds are just chill dudes who exist & you can see them & its great. Fuck gulls though. They're nice to look at but will be bastards if you have food in some places. Ive been trying to learn german here & there and it is. Something. Mood but for english. Who needs grammer rules fuck em. I dont know polish so i definitely cant say. You probably mentioned it that sounds familiar but dang. Well it at least wont be as bad? My joke answer is gay sex would be less gay than whatever bronya/seele & march/stelle have goin on. My serious answer is that but also that was really well paced & written. Svarog my bro. Love him. Cocolia confrontation had killer music & the interaction with preservation was cool too. Love fire stelle abilities. Mobile is tough but just gotta fuck it we ball through it. Ill definitely have to add rain world to my list. Dredge is like. Lovecraftian horror fishing sim. Its really neat. River city girls is a simple beat em up adventure game where you fight through town doin little quests on your way through the main one. Real fun easy controls & the soundtrack is real good. Please do id love to hear your exploits. Yeah i have work a lot & so does she plus her kids so i dont talk to mine much either. Im getting to the point in star rail where i am catching up like genshin so ill probably log in less on that too unless more story happens or an event catches my eye. After next planet story anyways. Im not far enough in simulated universe to do swarm disaster sadly. Just gotta. Level them characters as usual. Ps5 star rail gave me gepard which he's good but like. I want bronya

YEAH ITS GREAT and thank you!! we have different groups this year and im very happy ab this bc most of the popular girls im scared of that i shared a group with last year are in the other one now. so im chillen. yeah shes VERY epic hehehehe!!!!! love her. YEAH frfr i agree.... ab the gulls as well i almost got Physically Attacked by one when i was on a trip on an island near alicante cos i was hanging out in the sea and went towards a small island not far away from the shore. not knowing there was a gull nest on it. but i took the hint when one started Screaming at me like halfway through. god i am scared of these things. theyre cool but from a safe distance. and ahhh good luck with learning german!! i took 4 years of it in primary school and still dont know a thing. but its a very charming language so maybe when i get a solid hang of spanish, ill revisit it. tho it Is funny to joke with my friends ab how i didnt allow ppl to germanize me. german was mandatory under the nazi occupation and theres this one patriotic song with the lines "nie będzie niemiec pluł nam w twarz / ni dzieci nam germanił" [the german will not spit in our face / nor germanize our children] but these days its often used for jokes ab having to learn the language. and yeah i suppose thats true!! it is what it is. anyway. YEAH i actually agree with both the joking and serious part andkfnjjb ESPECIALLY the cocolia boss fight. GOD that was cool. i honestly dont use fire trailblazer abilities that much but yes she does come in handy. good luck with surviving on mobile o7 also keep me updated if you do end up playing it!!!!!! its unbelievably hard but like. in a good way. OOH BOTH OF THESE SOUND VERY FUN!! speaking of which i have so many games i wanna play..... but i literally just spent around 200zł [a bit under 46 dollars] two days ago [wait im gonna tell you how in a second]. which actually connects to dye update: i redid my hair since it washed off pretty quickly [but ah i look so nice in red] for the very event i ended up spending way too much money on. and yeah fair rn im actually going onto genshin more often than star rail bc the fontaine exploration + catching up on sumeru exploration is just. So fun. havent played swarm disaster yet either...... no time...... i have a Lot of stuff to do for school recently. its been like what. 2 weeks. and we already finished the first chapter from history and were gonna have an exam soon. which im Dreading btw bc for some reason i went for extended history in school despite being physically unable to remember dates. but hey at least extended geography is easy [so far]. so fuck it we ball. anyway ah congrats on getting gepard!!! hes pretty overpowered yeah but i want bronya as well [i say barely ever logging into the game]. which is pretty funny bc i already got 3 5* things on standard in star rail while being like 150 pulls in and they were two claras and GEPARDS LIGHTCONE. which i cant even use on march since i run her in clara teams in which i need the taunt on clara. Lol. but whatever. ANYWAY ABOUT THE EVENT uhhh you Might recall that i went to like a. con-adjacent thing last year. its actually just mainly for buying merch but a Lot of people go in cosplays. anyway i went this year as well and got a bunch of prints [of focalors, fischl, signora, silver wolf, kafka, and miku], and some other stuff [charms of himeko starrail, silver wolf, and kafka, as well as bronya honkaiimpact3rd and kafka pins]. and a very cute choker. so YEAH for the sheer amount of stuff i got id say its a very good price but i still feel bad ab spending so much money in one go sjdkgkgjh

[princeofyorkshire]

hola effie🌻 cry baby, black nail polish y flower crown

hola candeeeee <3

black nail polish: do you have a bucket list? if so, what are the top three things?

i actually don’t… i never really know what i want so i never made one lolll. i think my priority rn is graduating uni and that’s it, maybe after that i’ll want to do something else but that’s all i can think of right now

flower crown: when did you last sing to yourself?

i sing to myself all the time i’m surprised the answer is not I Am Singing Right Now! but to be fair i just woke up an hour ago and still haven’t gotten up nor brushed my teeth soooo imma say it was probably last night!

i’m adding a read more thing now cause the next answer was unnecessarily long lol

cry baby: list the concerts you have been to and talk about how they make you feel.

ooo god ok i’ve been to a few by the same artists so i’ll put them all together!! my first concert was one direction in 2014. i don’t really have a lot of memories from it, i just remember that it started raining when i got into the stadium so i looked up to the sky with open arms and the silliest smile on my face, i was so happy and excited to see them!!! i had only been a fan of them for a year and a half so i didn’t have to wait long but it felt like i had been in the fandom forever

that same year i saw r5 which was. very random lol. my friend wanted to go but didn’t have anyone to go with, the tickets weren’t too expensive so i went with her. i saw them twice again after that show. they were always fun! the music was kinda disneyish but i liked it anyway, ross was always an absolute sweetheart so i had a great time everytime!

i saw the vamps twice and those were the most random concerts actually. the first time i saw them was in 2016 and i bought a ticket the day of the show. i didn’t even like them, but my friend’s cousin got sick and gave her her ticket, so my friend told me they were very cheap so i should buy one and go with her so i did. and i really enjoyed it! the second time i saw them tho… i don’t know what changed, but i remember feeling a bit bored? and kinda ignored lol. we had the same seats as the year prior but it was the opposite side. so like, the dude who was closest to us didn’t really. look at us. and i mean we weren’t close at all, it was a good view anyway but he just. didn’t even wave so that was kinda eh. i saw tini tho so that was something!!!

saw fifth harmony twice lmfaooo the first time was. probs the worst show i’ve been to? there was like… no interacting w the crowd at all it all felt v robotic. maybe i’m not used to shows w ppl dancing but idk. camila was the most fun at the show. also i was annoyed cause they changed the venue and i ended up w shit seats lol so maybe that influenced it. also it only lasted an hour and it was v far from my house so that sucked too lol. the second time i had pit and got very close so i liked it more but i think that’s literally the only reason, i don’t think i would have enjoyed it if i had nosebleed seats or something like that rip

i saw niall in 2018! it was a very chill concert and i really liked it!!!! i don’t remember a lot i’ll be honest i just know that i liked it. pit wasn’t that bad cause his music was very chill so i didn’t fight for my life that time!

ok finally 2022. imma start w harry. i saw him in 2018 as well but i’m putting those two together: i had an AMAZING time both times, i really love harry as a performer! my least favorite thing about his shows tho are … the fans … they are just rude and mean for no reason. last week was only bad while we were queuing outside but in 2018 they were SO aggressive while waiting for him to come out AND during the show and that annoyed me but i can’t say anything negative about harry. i had a blast both times and i still can’t believe how lucky i got this year being so close to him lol

trueno <3 my fucking beloved <3 that man has ENERGYYYY. i was so impressed by him and the other dudes performing w him. i loved the atmosphere at the show. i love how political he has become. hating on cops, loving the argies. it was everything i needed and more!

coldplay was also great. you know, i never really paid attention to them and i only went to see them cause my dad likes them and we surprised him w tickets but god, what a show. chris martin? an insane charming motherfucker. i was so happy during that show. love those silly little bracelets. love chris’ love for argentina. loved singing de musica ligera w 70k argies. it was so good. bless him and the band <3

AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST!!!! LOUIS!!!! i still can’t believe i got to see my boy twice. i was so nervous the whole time, i wanted everything to go right (aka didn’t want to pass out lol) so thinking about it all the time made me very very anxious and i def think i could have had a better time. i still had a fucking blast tho, i couldn’t believe LOUIS was in front of me like i was actually in shock during the first show. to this day i watch my videos and go . i can’t believe i took this. lol. i can’t wait to see him again sometime next year/2024 <3

aesthetic themed ask list

[dumdumsun]

And Dusk

A/N: Enjoy ❤️

Warnings: blood and violence

Word Count: 1975

—————————————

Chapter 4: Always Next Time

Who the hell were those men?

Shaken up from her encounter with the three gunmen, (Y/N) threw the front doors of her home open and hurried inside with Mr Pennycrumb skittering behind her. “Dad?” She called out as she hurried all around, her voice breaking and echoing throughout the house. “Dad?!”

“(Y/N), hun, what’s going on?” The southern accent sounding from behind her caused her tense posture to relax as she turned to Grace.

“Mom… W-Where’s Dad?”

“He’s at a meeting, sweetheart. I’m not sure where, he didn’t tell me much,” When her daughter nodded with a faraway look, Grace took a step closer. “What happened? Where’s Preston?”

Swallowing, (Y/N) tried her best to crawl out of the hole she dug for herself, but it seemed to just be getting deeper. “Uh… I was attacked by some crazy people a-and Preston decided to take me home.” She rushed out as her feet quickly took her to the staircase that led to the rooms. Grace was immediately on her heels.

“You were what?! Honey, are you okay?! Who was it, what’d they do?!”

“It’s fine, Mom-”

“No, it’s not! You need to be tellin’ us these things, (Y/N). W-What if somethin’ like last time happened?” Grace recalled the day the two met. The girl’s shoulders visibly tensed and her mother wondered if she should have said that.

“Mom… I-”

“It’s alright, darlin’. I’m sorry for saying that.”

“No, no!” (Y/N) quickly turned towards her and brought her into a tight hug. Grace chuckled and returned the affection. “I’m glad you worry… It lets me know I’m loved.”

Grace gently ran her hand through the girl’s hair. “You most definitely are…”

(Y/N) began to get choked up, so she pulled away before the waterworks could make their presence known. She pointed behind herself awkwardly. “I’m gonna… get some sleep. I’m a little exhausted…”

“Of course, sweetheart. How about I make you a snack when you wake up?”

The familiarity of this woman making her food simply because she loved her had the girl’s (e/c) orbs nearly overflowing with tears as she nodded. “I’d love that. Thank you, Mom… I love you.” She grinned before slipping into her bedroom and softly closing the door. As soon as she heard her mother’s footsteps echo down the hall, she quickly wiped her eyes and charged towards her bed, flopping onto her back and closing her eyes.

Inhale for one, two, three, four

One, two, three, four…

One moment, she’s in her bedroom, and in the next, she’s in the park where she left her date. She adjusted her blurry vision by blinking several times. The fogginess washed away to reveal Preston much closer to her than she was comfortable with. His brown eyes were glancing at her lips as his blonde waves, once slicked back, fell in his eyes as he leaned close to her, lips puckered. Before his lips could graze hers, she pressed her index and middle fingers to his mouth. The boy frowned and stopped his movement, eyes fluttering open. “Um… What are you doing?”

“I-I was, uh-”

“I have to go,” She stood to her feet. “I think Mr Pennycrumb ran away.”

“Oh,” Preston’s entire expression fell into a look of irritation that had her blood boiling every time she saw it. “Then, I’ll help you look.”

“No,” She shook her head. “I don’t think that’ll be necessary. I’m just…”

(Y/N) placed her hand over her eyes and feigned sadness. “I’m so torn up about it… I just wanna be alone…”

“Awe, honey,” Preston stood and moved to stand in front of her. “I told you that you didn’t need that dumb dog. How about I take you to get some ice cream-”

“I just said I wanted to be alone!” She quickly turned away and took long strides to get away from him faster. “We’ll reschedule!”

Groaning into her hands, (Y/N) made her way back to her home, running to the side where the roof cast its shadow, a perfect hiding spot. Sitting down in the grass, she hugged her knees to her chest as close as she could before humming her three-note tune to dismiss her clone. Her eyes rolling to the back of her head, she became dizzy and her vision faded to black. When she opened her eyes, she was in her bedroom again, laying on her back. Exhaling, she let her hand drop onto her chest. “God…”

-------------------------------------------------

“This is it.” Five announced as he and Diego exited the car stolen by the latter. The two approached their father’s company building with slow, hesitant steps as they surveyed the exterior.

“‘D.S. Umbrella’. This is it.” Diego muttered. The closer they neared the entrance, the slower Five’s pace grew until he stopped walking altogether. Diego turned to his brother in concern. “You okay?”

Five hesitated. “Yeah, fine. Just…” When he reached the front door, he let out a sigh. Diego swiftly took out his knife and began picking the lock on the door.

“How long has it been since you’ve seen the old man?”

“Forty-five years…”

“That’s a trip…”

“No kidding…” The boy sighed yet again. “You know, when I was stuck out there in the apocalypse, there wasn’t a day that went by where I didn’t hear his voice in my head.”

Diego didn’t look away from his task. “What was he saying?” He asked before muttering to himself when he couldn’t get the door to unlock.

“‘I told you so’.”

The quote itself made Diego scoff and shake his head. “Yeah, I’ve witnessed (Y/N) get an earful of that after you left… Dad used to lock her in that damn room all the time…”

“What room?” Five stood straighter, the mention of his love something he would never disregard.

“A small, dark room in a part of the house none of us were allowed to go… I don’t know how she did it, but he kept her in that room with no windows or light or human interaction until she was able to find you,” Diego looked up at his brother. “Almost a week.”

“A week? He kept her there for almost a week?!”

“Yep. And each day she couldn’t reach you, we could hear him shouting about her ‘not wanting to find her true potential’ or whatever bullshit he tried to beat into her mind to make her feel like shit. But something must’ve happened, because on the fifth day, Mom was bringing her to her room. God, she looked…”

Five wasn’t sure if he wanted to know.

“She looked dead. Like she had just come from her own grave. She didn’t talk to anyone for a while.”

“Starlight…” The boy shut his eyes and shook his head. His mind immediately thought back on Luther’s words. Perhaps he had been dragging her into every mess he made, and he’d been doing it far longer than he thought.

Diego was silent for a few beats before breaking it with a huff. “But hey, if Dad’s here, he’s never met either of you before, so he can’t say ‘I told you so’.”

“I’m sure the bastard will find a way.” Five growled, the tiniest hint of a sarcastic smile on his face before it fell moments later. Without warning, he blinked inside the building and unlocked the door for his brother, who sat dumbly before him.

“Right… Gotta remember that.” Diego cleared his throat as he stood to his feet and walked inside. After searching around for a bit, the two decided to split up to cover more ground. Five tried several rooms, all with locked doors until he found one in particular.

The decor was disturbing, to say the least. Set up to be a family room, yet the only “people” inhabiting the room were three mannequin-esque figures. Brushing off the chill that ran down his spine, he made his way to another room with a desk on one side of it, going through several papers until he came across an invitation to a gala. Deeming this useful, Five pocketed the invitation just before the sound of something metallic clattering behind him could be heard. Slowly, the boy stalked closer to a part of the room where a child’s play area had been set up. There was a table with puzzles, crayons and paper. Five unknowingly passed a chalkboard with the names “Pogo” and “(Y/N)” written in yellow chalk. The boy’s eyes caught a drawing on the table and picked it up. It had to have been drawn by a child, the monkey on the paper poorly drawn. The character beside it, though, had the gears turning in Five’s head. It was a girl with (h/l) (h/c) hair and (s/c) skin. He was going to look around the area more when he heard another noise coming from in front of him. He dropped the paper and moved forward, his body going still at who stepped out of the shadows.

An ape wearing only pajama pants cautiously crawled out of his hiding spot and Five immediately knew who it was. His soft grunting and squeaking made the boy’s voice and actions become softer as he crouched down in front of the chimp. “Hi… Pogo,” He whispered as the two got closer. “Hey… It’s alright, little buddy.” He softly smiled as both he and Pogo stared at each other in wonder. With a gentleness only shown to his love, Five slowly reached forward. “Pogo… It’s good to see you-”

He was caught off guard when Pogo screeched and struck Five in the side of his neck, causing the boy to cry out and fall over. The chimp quickly moved away from Five and ran through the glass wall, leaving him a panting mess. The boy looked all around as his hand pressed onto his bleeding wound. “Diego! Diego!” He called out as he stumbled to his feet, dashing out of the room. Little did he know, Diego was nowhere near him, having his own share of bloodshed.

Just as Diego was about to have his ass handed to him, he spotted a rebar a little ways away from him. Turning slightly, he kicked the man who had a grip on his arm, setting himself free. The Kraken jumped onto the platform, grabbed the rebar in both his hands, and backflipped off the platform, landing right in front of his shadow-clad opponent. The man dodged nearly every swing Diego took at him, save for the one to the side, and then to the leg that sent him to his knees. Raising the rebar above his head, Diego was just ready to give this man hell. But when he raised his head and revealed himself to be Sir Reginald Hargreeves, Diego hesitated. “Dad…” He whispered before a small knife sunk itself into his abdomen. He wheezed out a breath, his father staring into his eyes as he muttered,

“Ametur.”

Diego could do nothing but fall to the ground as blood seeped out of his wound after the knife was ripped out of him, watching as Reginald continued down the foggy pathway. He clapped his gloved hands twice, alerting a screeching Pogo to drop down from where he had been waiting. Once the chimp was on the ground, he and Reginald joined hands, continuing away from the man bleeding out on the ground.

-------------------------------------------------

As Grace and (Y/N) painted together, the girl hummed her usual tune, being interrupted when her mother softly gasped. “Y’know what? Reggie wasn’t at a meeting. He was takin’ Pogo to run some tests. That’s why he’s out so late.”

“Oh, yeah, I forgot,” (Y/N) sighed. “I wanted to go this time…”

“There’s always next time, darlin’.”

“Yeah,” The girl returned to her painting. “Next time.”

—————————————

Taglist: @unfortu-nate-ly @sapphicsyn @m00n-sh @starcurrent @alexander-hamilhoe @youcandalekmyballs @wonderlandfandomkingdom @yrdadjstcallsmekatya @sm0kingcrack @a-t-h-r-e-e-n-a @moatsnow @bubblegumflamingos @starstormssymphony @meowiemari @magicalgothpandamaker @simping-4-fictional-men @hehehehannahthings @harrystylescherrie @rhain3 @himikaphoo @zerocanonlywriteshit @xxeiraxx @camerondiaz48104 @isawachickeninatree @theyaremorethanjustfictional @that-can-of-fizz

[sour-n-salty-citrus]

Do you have any hopes for the season finale? I saw in another ask, you described the dynamic between rick and morty this season as "very weak, distant, and downright frankly boring" and I completely agree with you! I hope that, because this is most we'll see rick and morty interacting this season, it'll have at least a few moments of what makes their dynamic so interesting to watch.

(Ok i started airing my grievances with this season, which ended up being... long, so skip this paragraph (starting at / / /) to get to my thoughts on the finale)

Oh gosh I remember that ask (I think-). And yeah, maybe I'm being a bit overly critical. I'll probably look back on this season with retrospect, and a kinder, fonder view. Ik androgynousblackbox (think thats right) made a great point about it being the season FOR rickorty shippers. And sure, I agree on some bits, like Rick acting all pissy and partying the way you would if your ex got with someone new in the planetina ep. Overall though, i think my problem lies in that I was enjoying more individual moments than episodes themselves, especially the middle three. For example- Amortycan Grickfitti. Like, I really liked the idea of the Ship getting on a crazy adventure with Summer and Morty (and Chutback). I like the idea of a Beth-Jerry-Rick adventure. But put together, it's just kinda... meh? You know? I liked the first half of the Thanksgiving special... but it kinda dragged on after that. I get that they want to give other characters (particularly female ones) more attention, which is completely understandable and i encourage it(!) but I can't help but find it underwhelming. Like, Summer in the voltron ep was like- girl how are you STILL vying for Rick's attention! He's the worst! Haven't we done this already? (I will say though I ADORE how far Beth has come, props to her for continuing to seeing through her dad's BS. I was worried the character would relapse into a more typical s1/s2 Beth, and I'm glad she didn't). Some of these plots, funnily enough, seem more fitting of the comics (they actually had a voltron parody already). Fun and entertaining for two or three-something issues, not so much a 22 minute episode. i think most of my complaints come from the dynamic between our titular characters- ok, I know I'm very biased (I mean you can see it), but I came to the show primarily for their relationship. It doesn't even feel drama-fueled, just that they kinda... can't be arsed. I'm torn because on the one hand, they're unhealthily codependent and this separation is probably a good thing, but on the other... it doesn't feel natural? I'm not sure if that's the right word- it's like, season 4 had them practically joint at the hip, but all that's suddenly flung out the window. It just kinda feels like this "i got better things to do" vibe from both of them and its strange. The only time they both got a solo adventure (I'm classifying "solo" as an adventure where they spent a significantly large portion of time together, without the other family members) was in the sperm ep and Thanksgiving ep. And, well, in the Thanksgiving ep Morty felt like a side character in his own show, and the sperm ep... um. Yeah. I don't think it's AS bad as people were saying, but I was cringing the whole time (the second hand embarrassment for Morty was so strong I had to turn off the episode multiple times and return to it. It's just like- godammit MORTY). And I think there's good reason those two seemed to be the most disliked episodes overall. They're the ones RaM spend the most time together and it's... meh. Meh? Meh. I don't mean to say the season overall is bad (it has loads of good points, and its amazing for Smith family as a whole) just that if we're talking specifically about the dynamic between these two? Yeah, I wouldn't recommend a single episode from this season so far to use as an example of their relationship.

/ / /

There's one thing this season has been pretty good at, though. And it's showing us what happens when Rick is alone.

And that brings me to the finale.

"Who is Rick without Morty?"

Well... we already know the answer to that. Pathetic. Sad. Lonely.

This season has been phenomenal in humbling Rick. (And trust me I'm happy for it- every time someone beats the crap outta this shitty old man I'm like YES!!! IT'S WHAT HE DESERVES!). Ep 1 had his "nemesis" clearly besting him, ep 2 had Beth making constant digs (love her) and overall pointing out his extreme callousness and cruelty towards even himself(ves). Ep 3- when Morty shows interest in a girl and ditches him (like seriously it's not like he's moving out, chill) he immediately goes on a bender and develops a deep attachment to the first person he can (wearing yellow, funnily enough). Ep 4, he devotes himself to becoming an "honest man" for his new child, only for it to instantly be taken away from him. Ep 5 highlights how RICK is the asshole for making fun of and taking advantage of someone well-meaning and honest, if "simple", and how literally not cool that is. Ep 6 has his crazy rivalry with the president, and they both get smacked down a couple pegs for that. Ep 7 shows what happens when he allows himself to get carried away, and that he can end up driving everyone else away in the process (lucky they still wanted to save his ass when he needed them). And episode 8? Hooooo boy. Episode. 8. We see a direct parallel in Birdperson with Morty, and the whole "Rick and [insert] 100 years!" Rick has few people he cares about, arguably only one or two that he truly devotes himself to, but when he does, boy does he go HARD. We see younger Rick, optimistic, energetic, friendly and hopeful. And we see all of that crushed in minutes. Rick is desperate for a companion, someone to see the stars with. He needs someone there, someone he can trust and rely on to stay. Someone like Morty. So without Morty, who is Rick?

No one.

And the thing is, Morty doesn't need Rick anymore. Not like Rick needs him. In season 1, Morty was this bright-eyed kid who was new to the cosmos and the multiverse, who needed his grandpa there with him as they explored all these places together. But that's not him anymore. That's not them.

The promo has Morty using the portal gun to go somewhere w/o Rick's permission (i like to think it's boob world lol). It doesn't matter to me as much where he's going, as much as he's doing it alone. He doesn't just not need Rick there, he doesn't want him.

(Also correct me if im wrong but I've missed that sweet portal gun so much. I think the last ep was like- the first time this season we saw it).

Morty's response to Rick? "Replace me!". And wow. Wow. WOW. Morty doesn't give a FUCK! I think Rick thinks that because he's so smart, that he can offer so much, that Morty will come crawling back, and I don't think he will.

Hopes for the finale! Hmm. I mean, I definitely hope "evil" Morty makes a reappearance, haha. I think we all do tbh ;). I want to see some Morty development too, this season has been very Rick-centric (not that there's anything wrong with that!) so I wanna see what's in store for Our Boy. I really hope we get to see the Citadel again, and see the state it's in, but I doubt it. We know something super big is in store, it's just a question of what? Other hopes I have is some Summer + Beth action (please let them team up Im BEGGING) and Jerry too ahaha. I'd love if some other side characters made an appearance as well. Oh- I'm definitely expecting a dramatic cliffhanger at the end of the first half leading to the second half, with the kind of angsty music that leads into the credits (pls that shit is so good (OH WAIT imagine if it was like, for the damaged coda, but like- the chopin version or smth so it could be more subtle maybe bruhhhh)). Ok haha, maybe that's asking too much, the writers made it clear in the story train ep that they weren't gonna do that big dramatic showdown (... unless 👀). Oh, I'd also love some Premium Angst too, like someone getting kidnapped/nearly dying (like ACTUALLY nearly dying). These stakes better be so damn high I could spear a man on them! OH, also I remember androgynousblackbox (is that right? I hope it is) mentioned something along the lines that they could be driving Rick and Morty apart this season in order to have them come back together stronger than ever in an explosive finale, which, I'm strongly hoping for myself.

Thanks if you made it this far! If you have any thoughts on or hopes of your own for the finale please feel free to share! :D

[theultimatefanficwriter]

Gunham scenario. Nagito does some crazy bs to see how much Gundham loves you (already dating) and randomly tries to kill you in the dining hall, but Gundham protects you and ends up getting the stab wound instead. Nagito says something about hope about your love. So Gundham is on bed rest, but you have to watch over him and his Devas. His Devas a so sweet with you and help you take care of Gundham.

Oh HELL YEAH, ANGST! I freaking LOVE angst with a side of comfort! This prompt is awesome, thank you!

The Darkside of Hope-Gundham Tanaka x Reader

You awoke to Monokuma’s morning announcement still feeling exhausted. Teruteru’s trial yesterday had completely worn you out.

“Good morning, my love.”

A tired voice gained your attention, and you turned your head to see Gundham Tanaka, your boyfriend of about a year laying beside you. You smiled softly at him and kissed his forehead. “Good morning, Gundham.”

“Are you still feeling unwell from the ordeal of last night?” He questioned you as he sat up, his hair ruffled from his night’s sleep and not in it’s usual style. You giggled to yourself at that. You always thought he looked adorable with it down, and even cuter when he just woke up.

You nodded to his question. “The whole thing with Teruteru was so...sad. He wanted to help us and Nagito....” Gundham pulled you into his chest, and you smiled gratefully at him as you continued. “And...and he just wanted to know if his mom and diner were alright. It’s all just so...terrible.”

“I know my dearest Fallen Angel.” The breeder said softly. “Nothing of our situation is fair in the slightest.” He gently tilted your head up to meet his eyes. “But at least we have each other, yes?”

You nodded happily. “Yeah. I don’t know how I could handle this if I didn’t have you.”

“I understand. I, too, feel that way.” Gundham smiled gently and kissed your lips. “Thankfully we are not alone, nor will we ever be.”

You smiled warmly at that, before reluctantly pulling away. “We should probably make our way to the restaurant.” You said, standing from the bed.

Your lover sighed as he followed suit. “Yes, you are right. It would do no good to worry the mortals with our absence.”

You nodded. “Thank you for letting me stay in your cottage, Gundham.” You thanked him. “I really didn’t feel like being alone.”

“It is of no problem, my dark queen.” Gundham assured you with a smile. “I will do whatever I can to comfort you and keep you safe.”

Your chest fluttered when he said that. “You’re so sweet, my lord.” You replied, giggling softly when you saw him blush lightly. “I’m heading to my cottage to get ready. I’ll see you soon.” With a final goodbye, you left his room.

“Ah, so you were with Gundham.”

You jumped at the unexpected voice. You turned to see Nagito standing before you. You felt a wave of unease as you remembered his performance in the trial the previous night. “Y-yes, I was.” You confirmed. “Is that a problem?”

Nagito quickly shook his head, holding his hands up. “Oh, no no no! It’s not a problem at all! Quite the opposite in fact! I think it’s wonderful you and Gundham have each other to rely on. You’re quite fortunate to know each other prior to coming here.”

You furrowed you brow, not quite sure what Nagito was getting at. “Yeah...We were both really excited when we realized we were both accepted into Hope’s Peak.”

“And now you have each other to rely on for your hope!” The lucky student hugged himself, and the crazed look in his eyes returned. “How lucky.”

You began slowly walking past him. “Right...” You muttered, deciding to ignore him. But what he said next stopped you in your tracks.

“But...how can you be sure of his love for you?”

You blinked, and slowly turned back to look at him. “...What?”

Nagito gave you a crazed grin that sent a chill down your spine. “How can you be so sure your hope aligns with his? Perhaps his love for you is overpowered by his want for escape, and he is simply using it as a cover?”

Your eyes widened, and you took a step away from Nagito. “Wh...what?! No! Gundham would never do something like that! He loves me! I know he does!”

“But are you certain?” The boy asked, taking a step towards you. You took another one back, feeling a pang of fear in your chest. “Maybe after realizing the situation we are in, he began making his own plans. Maybe he has plans to kill you, using your relationship as an alibi.”

You clenched your fists and shook your head. “No! I said he wouldn’t do that!” You snapped, glaring at the white haired student. “You don’t know anything about Gundham! He would never hurt me!”

Nagito nodded. “You’re probably right. The Ultimate Y/T would know much more than trash like me, especially about her own boyfriend.” He walked past you, only stopping briefly to speak some final words. “Though, perhaps you should still keep what I said in mind.” And with that, he walked towards the hotel.

You watched him leave, and for a moment you took his words to heart, worry filling you. You quickly pushed all of that to the side. Gundham would never hurt you, let alone kill you. Nagito is just trying to manipulate you like he had Teruteru. With an annoyed sigh, you walked into your cottage to get ready.

~~~

You walked up the steps to the restaurant and immediately noticed Gundham sitting at a table off to the side. You also saw Nagito sitting alone in the corner. You met his gaze for a moment before walking over to your boyfriend and sitting across from him.

You smiled when he saw you. “Ah! There you are, my queen of darkness!” He greeted you, taking your hand in his. “You are looking radiant as always.”

You chuckled and shook your head. “Gundham, I look the same I always do.”

The breeder gave a small smirk. “And thus you always shine with the radiance of an angel.” He frowned slightly. “However I can tell worry taints your features. What is it that plagues you, my love?”

You bit your lip, your eyes darting over to where Nagito was seated. You noticed he wasn’t there anymore, and though that worried you, you ultimately didn’t pay it much mind. “It...it isn’t anything, Gundham.” You told him, attempting to give him a reassuring smile. “I just had a...run in with Nagito.”

Gundham narrowed his eyes. “What did that vermin say to you?” He growled lowly. “Did he attempt to control your mind as he had the chef?”

“I...I think so?” You answered before shaking your head and giving Gundham a soft smile. “But don’t worry. Really. I’m fine.”

Your boyfriend looked unsure, but he sighed. “If you insist, I shall drop it.” He said.

You smiled and leaned over to kiss his cheek. “Thank you, Gundham.” You whispered. As you pulled away, you noticed something from the corner of your eye. You turned, and saw Nagito approach.

Gundham noticed too and glared at the lucky student. “And what business do you have with us?” He demanded.

“I know scum such as myself has no business interacting with either of you.” Nagito began. His eyes looked over at you, and you began feeling uneasy. “But something has been bothering me. I must check exactly how strong your hopes are.”

“What in the Nine Hells are you-”

Gundham didn’t get to finish his sentence before Nagito lunged. He held a knife as he ran straight at you. Your eyes widened, and you froze, unable to move. You saw some others in the room noticed, but were too far away to act.

Gundham, however, acted quickly, dashing in front of you right before Nagito made contact with you. Your lover let out a pained grunt and took a knee as a fleshy impact sound was heard.

“Gundham!” You exclaimed worriedly, rushing over in front of him as Nekomaru and Akane restrained Nagito.

“Ah, so I was wrong! Gundham’s love for you is his hope!” The crazed boy laughed as he was dragged away from you and Gundham. “It’s so strong he would risk himself! How beautiful!”

“S-shut up!” You called back to him as you knelt in front of Gundham. The knife stuck out of his stomach, and blood was staining his shirt. “M-Mikan! Mikan please come here! Hurry”

“C-coming!” The nurse exclaimed, rushing over to you and nearly tripping as she did so.

“I-I am fine, m-my fallen angel.” Gundham tried to assure you, though his pained expression did little to make you feel better. “It w-will take more than this to t-take down Gundham T-Tanaka!”

“S-shut up, Gundham.” You muttered, tears forming in your eyes. “Don’t be so proud right now. You have a fucking knife in you!”

“And I w-would take a thousand more if it meant you would remain safe.” Your boyfriend said firmly. “I will never allow you to be harmed, n-no matter what shall become of me.”

The tears began to fall. “Y-you can be such an idiot sometimes.” You murmured, clinging to his jacket. “You can’t just go and do something stupid like that! I don’t want you getting hurt either!”

“U-um, I-I’m so s-sorry to interrupt...” Mikan spoke up. “B-but Gundham n-needs to lie down. C-can someone h-help me take him t-to his cottage?”

“I can do that.” Hajime offered, stepping forward. He placed a hand on Gundham’s shoulder. “Can you walk, Gundham?”

~~~

It was some time later, and you sat in Gundham’s cottage. Mikan had done all she could and had ordered Gundham to bed rest. You told everyone you’d keep an eye on him. Currently he was asleep.

You just watched him as he slept, tears still staining your cheeks. You knew it wasn’t your fault. It was Nagito’s. He had tried to stab you unprovoked. But still...you couldn’t help but feel awful. Like it should have been you who got hurt.

You heard soft squeaking, and you looked over to see the Dark Devas on the ground looking up at you. You smiled softly and leaned down, placing your hands down for them to climb on. When they did you lifted them up to eye level. “Hey, little ones.” You said to them. “Gundham’s out of it right now. But....but he’ll be...”

You bit your lip. You wanted to reassure them he would be fine. Mikan had told you he’d be fine. But...but you were still scared. What if you lost him? You weren’t sure if you could go on. You couldn’t trust anyone else here.

You were broken out of your thoughts by the Devas nuzzling your cheek. You smiled softly down at them and pet them gently. “Thank you, little ones.” You said quietly. “Gundham has trained you extremely well.” You looked over to your boyfriend’s bed. “You’re all worried about him too, aren’t you?” You asked, then slowly stood, carrying the hamsters over. You lowered your hands and allowed them to crawl onto it. They carefully made their way over to Gundham and nuzzled him, Jum-P burrowing himself in the breeder’s scarf and quickly falling asleep,

You smiled softly as you watched your boyfriend and his beloved hamsters rest. You looked down at his middle and winced. The bandage around his stomach was already nearly completely soaked through with blood. You would have to change it when he woke up.

You clenched your fists as you thought about Nagito. Kazuichi had stopped by and informed you the crazed boy had been tied and thrown into the old building, so there was no chance of him hurting someone else. That helped you relax, but you were still overwhelmingly angry at him. He had done this to Gundham just to prove he really loved you? That wasn’t even any of his business! And what was that hope bullshit he kept going on about?

“Ngh...M-my love?”

Your gaze shot over to Gundham’s face at the soft mumblings, and you saw him blinking open his eyes. The breeder began attempting to pull himself up, and you ran over to his side to help him. After you got him into a sitting position, you smiled softly at him. “How did you sleep, Gundham? Do you feel alright?” You asked him.

“I slept quite well knowing I had you looking over me, my angel.” Your boyfriend replied, returning your smile. “As for how I am feeling...” He frowned and looked down at his stomach. “I must admit, I have felt better. This stinging reminds me of when I was bitten by a dreaded viper.”

You sighed. “I’m sure. I’m so sorry, Gundham. I wish there was more I could do to stop the pain.”

The breeder frowned and reached a hand up, cupping your face. “Cease that at once, my love. You have done all you can to heal me, and I owe you my life. This is not your fault, so do not apologize. Understood?”

You smiled softly and nodded. “Alright. If you say so, Gundham. I understand.”

He chuckled lightly and pulled your face down to kiss you. When he pulled away, he looked down to the Devas that were nuzzling his face happily. “Were my subordinates well behaved and helpful?” He asked you, scratching Cham-P behind his ear.

You giggled and nodded. “Yes, they were.” You told him. “They kept me calm when I was worried about you. And they kept you company while you slept.”

Gundham looked down to Jum-P still slumbering in his scarf and chuckled. “I can see that. Well, I am glad they assisted you, my queen.”

You smiled down at the little critters. “They were very helpful.” You looked away from them and over to Gundham’s wound, and your smile fell. “...I need to change your bandage.”

Your boyfriend followed your gaze and scowled. “It would appear so.” He muttered, then let out a sigh. “Very well. Let us get it over with.”

You nodded, and after getting the supplies left by Mikan, you began to tend to Gundham’s wound, cleaning the cut and reapplying the bandage.

You heard Gundham hiss softly as you did, letting out a quiet curse. “I will banish that pathetic worm to hell.” He growled through his teeth as he clenched the bed sheets.

“I’m sorry, Gundham.” You apologized. “I’m doing all I can to make it not hurt.”

“Not for that reason.” He corrected you. “I do not care if I am inflicted with pain. What he is going to be destroyed for is his attempt to make this your fate.” He looked into your eyes. “I am used to feeling pain. I do not wish for you to ever have to be hurt, my queen.”

You couldn’t help but smile softly at that. You couldn’t believe you doubted for even a second that Gundham loved you. You leaned over and placed a light kiss on his cheek as you finished wrapping the new bandages around his wound. “Well I don’t want you being hurt either, my dark dumbass, so let’s try to protect each other without taking a bullet, alright?” You giggled.

Gundham chuckled in response. “Very well, my fallen angel. If you insist.” He gently caressed your face and pulled you closer so he could kiss you lovingly, the both of you closing you eyes as you enjoyed the kiss.

When you pulled apart from the kiss, you smiled at him. “You should get more rest, my king.” You told him. “I’ll be right here while you do. And I don’t plan on ever leaving.”

~~~

Hope that was what you had in mind! I like this prompt. Making Nagito the bad guy is fun, even if I do love the guy lol

[yandere-ac]

I love your blog so much!! 💞💞💞💞 If you want to, maybe a yandere K.K. Slider 🥺👉👈

Yandere K.K. Slider X Reader

Star

(There were two requests for this but I accidentally deleted one because I’m a dumb fuck)

C / O/C = Coffee of choice

K.K. Slider was not your average dog. You see, he was a world famous celebrity who was popular for his music. He was a dog who had it all yet...had nothing. He had money, fame, friends, fans, people throwing themselves at him! But he’d never really felt happy with any of it. Because of his fame, people put him up on a pedestal. And become of THAT he couldn’t interact with anyone like a normal person. He was always THE world famous K.K. Slider to these people, not ever just K.K.

But he had to accept it, if he didn’t he’d have gone depressed by now. At least he wasn’t famous for doing something proper, then people would call him stuff like “Mr. Slider” good lord, then he would DEFINITELY be depressed. But still, he did have some close friends who treated him like an equal instead of some star.

In a studio not far off, a cat with fluffy white fur was storming around, checking so that everything was in place. He was wearing a white checkered muffler, topping it off with a brown paperboy hat. “Mic? Check! Guitar? Check! Amplifiers? Check! K.K.?...god damnit- where the hell is he at?” The felines tail whisked in annoyance as he pinched the bridge of his tiny, pink nose. “Umm...we don’t know sir-“ “stay here I’ll get him. Make sure everything’s in check, CRACK ON EVERYONE! ...this dog is going to be the death of me” He mumbles the last part under his breath as everyone around him continued to unload all of the equipment, walking at a brisk pace he was wondering how he got into this situation. The cat looked all over, in his lounge, all over the studio, he made multiple calls to him only to get no response. He knew that there was only one place left where he hadn’t looked. The roof. “God damnit Tota...” and so he climbed up the studio latter up to the roof, and sure enough. There he sat. Totakeke Slider.

“The latter again? When are you actually gonna climb like a normal Cat?” The white dog said, staring off into the distance, not turning around to look at the cat behind him. “Really Totakeke? The roof? What is this, the third time? Ye can’t just bunk off work when there’s a rehearsal about to begin” K.K. felt himself chuckle as he turned around to look at his frustrated friend. “Wow, three times now and you’ve yet to look up here first” he smiled, making the cat tense up. “Uh!- don’t change the subject! You’re the one who’s not at his own bloody rehearsal!” He approached his friend only to be pulled down to the ground next to him. “Chill out daddio. It’s in two hours” K.K looked out over the sky, letting out a wonderful sigh. “Yeah? And ye are supposed to be practicing! What happens if ye forget the lyrics? If ye forget what to play?” “Seamus” “if ye mess up the song?” “Seamus!” What if-“ K.K. grabbed ahold of his friends face, mushing his cheeks in between his paws. “Dude, chill out. I’m not gonna forget the lyrics to the songs. I wrote them!” K.K. said, letting out a little laugh at his agents spastic behaviour. Seamus face got light pink as he realized that he was rambling. “Ah yes of course...I’m sorry” K.K.s muffled laugh was now more amplified, he patted Seamus on the back as he did so. “No worries, I just wished you didn’t stress so much. I’m tellin ya, everyday I swear I can see grey hair on that scalp of yours” “dONT YER EVEN JOKE ABOUT THAT TOTA!”

“Alright people lets wrap it up! Ye did good today!” K.K. was walking off stage when he heard the gentle pats against the floor, he knew who was approaching him. “What’s happening Shimo!” He turned around to greet the little penguin as she ran towards him. “O-Oh! Did you hear me? K.K.?” She asked, very much startled about the musicians ability to know she was coming. “The whole studio hear ye lass” Seamus was quick to reply as he helped the others with carrying all the equipments. “Ah! I see...eheheh” Shimo gave a sheepish smile as she scratched her neck. “Heh, well did ya need something butternut?” K.K. asked her. “Well...I was gonna ask...after the next show, would you maybe give two cans of yours private autographs?” She asked, twiddling her fins together. “Of course I can! I love giving fans autographs! Who are they?” He asked excitedly. He always loved giving back to his fans, back when he wasn’t as popular and more of a freelance artist he didn’t even make people pay for his music. But that was then. Now his agents where always pushing him to capitalise on his fame. So nowadays he always took any chance possible to give back to the ones who took him as to where he is now. “Well, they’re two kids, one of the is a boy. His name is joji, he’s a five year human and the other one is a girl, kim, also five and a human” “A human?! Hah! Haven’t seen me one o’ those for quite some time!” Seamus was, once again, quick to quip in. Was that true? He was gonna meet not one but two humans? He’d seen many humans before at his concerts and he’d met a few of them but it was always so interesting to see them. Because for every human there was at least 4 animals to accompany them. It was just much rarer to be a human than to be an animal. “Well I would love to, and I’m sure we can made time after the show right Seamus?” K.K. and Shimo turned to his agent whom only responded by looking at the pair with a displeased look. “Well...I guess if they’re willin ta stay for a while after the show than sure, I don’t see a problem” this made the penguins eyes light up. “Oh thank you guys! They’ll be so happy to hear this!”

“Ahh it’s nothin lass. But uh these kids, they’re gonna have a parent accompanying them right? We don’t want two little children runnin’ around our studio without supervision” Seamus said walking towards the two. Shimo gave him a smile. “Yes! They’ll be accompanied by a family member! Don’t worry they won’t cause any trouble, Joji is an angel” Shimo assures the cat infront of her. “Right, right. Well, again, then there won’t be any trou-“ before Seamus could could finish his sentence, Shimo tackled him into a hug. And soon after that K.K. let out a small chuckle as he took the annoyed cat into a side hug. “Oh thank you Seamus! Thank you thank you thank you!”

“Agh! Get off me! Quit laughin’ Tota before I smack yer face off!”

“WE LOVE YOU K.K.!”

“DO BUBBLEGUM K.K.!”

“K.K.! K.K.!”

“Thank you! Everyone! I love you all! You’re all amazing!” The sound of his adoring fans was almost ear deafening, but he wouldn’t have it any other way. He loved each and everyone of them just as much as way back when he had about 30 fans. He still remember the day when he blew out and gained a large following, he remembered how happy he felt knowing that people enjoyed his music. And still today he loved his fans. Even if they were a little...intense. As he went backstage a white arm clung around him by the shoulder and he was walked away from all the noice. “Alright so you go change, tidy up, drink some water, just freshen up. We’ll get the wee lad and lass in `ere shortly alright?”

“Okey, thanks Seamus” The star said, walking to his lounge. This had been a good show, or at least he felt so. After washing off and chilling for a while he went out of his lounge to find Shimo. He opened his door and-

“Agh!”

Oh no. He hit someone in the face with the door. He ran out to help whoever he hit. “Oh my god are you oke-“ he stoppped himself before he could even start. Looking at the person before him, It was a human. They were rubbing one spot on their forehead bending over. “...uh...oh! Are you alright? I didn’t mean to hit you? Do you like...need ice?” The human groaned as they rose up again to meet his gaze. “No no, it’s- it’s alright I just- I got scared by the door suddenly just swinging open. It’s okey really” they looked at him and...my god. This human was very cute. Suddenly, a second smaller human popped out behind them. He was grabbing the fabric that surrounded the older ones legs with one arm while the other one was surrounded by a red cast. And then a thing small human ran out from behind the first ones legs and looked at him with big eyes...oh!

“You’re Kim and joji right?” He asked looking at the small girl and boy. At that they let out a little gasp and nodded. They boy seeming less shy. “Well, do you want an autograph little dudes?” He said as he crouched down to be on the same level as the kid. The boy, joji nodded as he ran up to him. K.K. snickered at the kids sudden enthusiasm as he took out a pen and paper. He looked first at the girl. “What do you want it to say?”

“To Kim, from your grooviest pop star ever! K.K. Slider! And then a buncha hearts and starts!” She said very enthusiastically. “Righto” he signed the paper and gave it to her. “Well little guy, what do you want it to say?”

“...to...to my biggest fan, Joji. Rock on, From K.K. Slider” joji said. This kid was just adorable. As he reached out for more paper the boy declined and pointed to his cats. Oh right! K.K. felt a little stupid for not realising that he wanted his cast signed, but he of course signed it. “Now what do we say kids?” The older one said. “Thank you K.K. Slider” the two of them said, as they said this they ran over to him and gave him a big hug. It took K.K. Of guard but he happily returned the hug. After a few seconds he got a bright idea. “Hey, wanna check out the stage?” The kids let out yet another gasp as he said this. “Yes! Please! Y/N can we please go see the stage?” They turned around to look at the older one, seemingly named Y/N. “Well, if it’s okey for K.K. Slider. Then sure. I do have to talk to Shimo about something”

And so the four went towards the stage. Joji was riding on K.K. Sliders back and Kim was happily skipping besides them, holding K.Ks hand. Y/N was trailing behind them. As K.K. opened the door to a bunch of animals running around, none of them really paying any mind to the dog. “Alright where do you wanna go to first? The production team? The stage?” Before they could answer Y/N walked up to one of the agents and tried to get their attention. “Exude me ms. Do you know where Shimo is? I have to ask her something” when the agent shook her head Y/N simply let out a sigh. “I think I know where she is. Hey frans could you show the kids around? I’ll help Y/N out” K.K. said as he helped Joji off his back. The two children followed after the agent as K.K. motioned for Y/N to follow him. “Shall we?”

“Sure”

As the two of them walked, they stroke up a conversation. “So are you a fan? Or just here for your kids?” “Oh well, i wouldn’t say I’m a fan. I do listen to some of your music now and again but this is the first time I’ve been to one of your concerts. Also, Kim and Joji aren’t my kids, they’re my sisters kids. I’m just their sitter for the evening” “Ah yes of course. Well did you enjoy the concert?” He asked as he walked closer to them. “I did. You’re a very talented musician K.K. Slider” “you can just call me Totakeke, it’s alright” K.K. Said with a grin. “okey, totakeke” they relied smiling back at him. They were so beautiful/handsome/stylish. Their lushes hair, their shining eyes, their soft skin. Everything about them, it drove him nuts. He’s never felt this about anyone even if he’s been in countless relationships. This wasn’t your average crush or even love. He wanted to have them. He wanted to cherish them. He wanted to-

“Oh! Shimo! There you are! I wanted to ask you if” the rest of the conversation became blurred for K.K.. He couldn’t focus on anything but them. What was this feeling! It was like a drug! And like every addict, he wanted more. He waited until the conversation was over to approach Y/N once more. “Hey Y/N...I just wanted to ask you if...umm...if you’d like to...maybe like...go out sometime?” God damn it. Why was he acting so awkwardly, he’s usually such a smooth talker but- “like a date? Sure I’d be happy to” at that moment K.K. Could feel his heart explode! “O-Oh! Yeah! Groovy! Well do you wanna meet up at the park at 3?” The two of them made plans to meet and the whole time, K.K. could feel his tail wag more and more violently. He couldn’t wait until 3 tomorrow.

Where were you!? Where you not coming!? Oh god he scared you off didn’t he? He really didn’t want to do something drastic but if you’re not gonna show up he might have to go against his rules. But just as he was considering doing something crazy he heard the sound of footsteps coming close. “Hi! I’m so sorry I’m late! Traffic was holding me up” It was you! You had arrived after all! “Oh! No worries daddio. Traffic can be a little extreme around these parts. But don’t worry, where we’re going is not very crowded and it won’t be overflowing with people” k.k. Said, flashing a toothy grin. “Oh where are we going?” y/N asked tilting their head slightly. “Oh you’ll see, c'mon!” With that K.K. Grabbed ahold of Y/N’s hand as they started running somewhere. All while Y/N had no clue of where they were going. After awhile, the pare arrived at a cozy little establishment called “brewsters coffie”. As the two walked in, K.K. grabbed Y/Ns hand. As they opened the door, the bell on top of it made a little sound. “Yo brews!” K.K. Greeted the bird behind the counter. “Hello K.K. who’s the lady friend?” The bird, Brewster, asked. “This is Y/N, they’re my date” K.K. responded. “Well you know our couples discount right? Also, it’s karaoke night so feel free to put on any old song” Brewster said going back to cleaning a cup.

“Alright so what do you want? I’m gonna take a (C/ O/C)” Y/N said as they sat down in a booth. “I think I’m just gonna have a latte” K.K. replied. And so, the two ordered and waited. As the date progressed both of them engaged more and more in their conversation, telling each other about them self’s and asking about each other. “So yeah, I started singing way back when I was just a lil pupper. It’s been my passion ever since” K.K. Said resting his chin in his one paw. As he looked at Y/N, the only thing he could think of was how amazing they were. Not only were their looks stunning but they were so interesting. Anytime they told him about something of themself he could feel his heart skip a beat. He wanted this human all for himself. If only there was a way for him to keep them. “Yeah, it must be cool to be a super star, practically everyone knows you. It’s silly really but...well I’ve always wanted to be a singer. I’ve written some songs but none have really ever gained any attention. I figured that I didn’t have time to try and get recognition right now. I got a job and such” Y/N said sheepishly, as if their dream was dumb. “Wait, stop the press. Say what? Can you sing or do you play instruments?” K.K. asked, even more excited now. If Y/N sang, they were a package deal. “Well, I do know how to play a few instruments but I mainly sing.” OH. MY. GOD. “Well come on! Show me what you got! Let’s do some karaoke!” Without giving his date a chance to respond he quickly grabbed ahold of their hand and booked it to the karaoke machine. “What do you wanna play? Good ol Brewster has a lotta songs and artists” Y/N thought for a moment before they lit up. “Oh! Does it have the ink spots? It’s a little old but I like the vibe of their songs” Y/N said as they typed in the song of their choosing. And luckily enough, it came up. ”Nice! Do you wanna do it on duet mode?” They asked him. In which he happily agreed. They started up the song and let the first line of text appear with the song.

“I don’t wanna set the world on fire...I just want to start a flame in your heart...” K.K. started, soon the timer ticked down for Y/N to sing their part. “In my heart I have but one desire, and that one is you. No other will do” as Y/N sung their first part. K.K. Could feel himself almost explode. Their voice, it was smooth as butter, yet soft and clean. He loved it, it was amazing! He wanted to only hear that voice! The two of them sang through the whole song. And then another one. And then another one. They say there for 40 minutes, just singing. Getting lost in each other’s eyes. After some songs they sat back down at their booth, having a breather as they were both exhausted. “Wow, Y/N your voice...it’s...it’s angelic! You should absolutely do this for a living!” K.K. said eccentric. “Oh stop it you” Y/N said bashfully as a light pink blush appeared on their face. “No I’m serious! You’re voice is so good! I wish you would get more attention....wait! I got it!” K.K. Exclaimed as he grabbed a hold of Y/Ns shoulders. “I’m about to go on a tour soon, why don’t you follow with! That way you can gain attention to your singing and we could maybe continue this relationship!” K.K. said happily. “Oh...I don’t know Tota...isn’t it a bit soon?” They asked in return. “Maybe but what’s life if you don’t take any chances, imagine it! You could become rich and famous! If you ever feel like backing out you can totally do so as well!” He wanted them to join him so desperately. If they didn’t say yes, he might have to trap them in his tour buss...

“Okey! Let’s do it! I’d love to tour with you Totakeke!” They’re eyes lit up when they answered.

Yes! Finally! He had a way of keeping them with him for a couple of months. And by then they were absolutely gonna fall for him! It was a perfect plan! His fans would love the two of them and if they ever tried to break up, his fans would peer pressure them into getting back together with them! It was the perfect plan! Oh Y/N! The tour was in a couple of weeks but he couldn’t wait until then! The idea of you being trapped with him. With nowhere to run to, it made his tail wag.

[baka-writings]

Daddy- Qin Fen smut

Warnings: smut, use of alcohol, swearing, dom!Qin Fen

Summary: After the end of Idol Producer you go out with oaca boys to celebrate and a certain someone gets a bit jealous ;).

A/N: You've known each other other before as you're Mubo's younger sister, but you never knew he had other feelings than friendship for you 😅 enjoy!

A/N 2: Can he be my dad pls?😭

*beep*

Your phone buzzed as you were eating your breakfast.

Message from big bro: Hey kiddo, today at 9 pm don't forget.

You: lol see you tonight old man

After you replied you continued eating your breakfast, mentally preparing yourself for tonight. A few minutes later your phone buzzed again.

From big bro: You're uninvited

You: Too bad it's not your party so you can't uninvite me gē ❤️

You laughed at the message. Mubo was always cancelling you just because you were younger. You were actually surprised that he let you hang out with other members anytime you wanted. Unless it was Qin Fen. You didn't know why. Well yes he is old but still. Mubo was always highkey judging you when you hang out only with Fen. You giggled at the thought and continued eating your breakfast.

*timeskip throughout the day since it was only you chilling and waiting for the evening*

After what felt like 3 years it was 7 pm and you decided to take shower and make yourself presentable.

"Hmmm what to wear" you thought to yourself. You were supposed to go to a club so it should be something hottish, but not too much. Mubo would kick your ass If you wore something "too much" anyway.

You decided to wear some leather pants, black tank top, leather jacket and platform boots. You let your hair down and put on a bit of make up, eyeliner and a red lipstick.

"Damn I look better than Mubo now"

All of this preparing took you a lot of time. It was 8:20 pm already so you headed outside and took a walk to the club. It wasn't that far and you were still not mentally prepared for all of them. They were all so energetic and your body was sometimes too tired.

It was almost 9 when you arrived to your destination and waited for them to arrive. They all arrived in what seemed like ages.

"What took you so long?" you scolded them, but directed it mostly to your brother.

"Someone took 2 hours to get ready" you raised an eyebrow at his response. They all gave you a hug except Qin Fen. He was just eyeing you. You'd have sworn he smirked. You brushed it off, processing to go inside.

You all sat down somewhere in the corner of the club since that table was the biggest.

"What are you all drinking? It's on me" Qin Fen told you all with a smirk.

"Gin tonic please?" you told him. He nodded as everyone else told him what they wanted. Mubo was eyeing you the whole time while the rest of the boys were talking with you as well.

"What are you looking at old man?" you teased.

He frowned at the nickname, "watch your tongue kiddo" You laughed at his response, winking at him to which he rolled his eyes.

It didn't take much time and everyone was slightly tipsy, except for Zuo Ye of course. That poor boy had to deal with your shit.

"You know Y/N you look kinda hot tonight" Zimo tried to flirt with you. This didn't go unnoticed by basically everyone. Mubo growled and sent a death glare towards Zimo who was now so close he could almost kiss you.

The alcohol in you was stronger and you kissed him. He of course kissed back. You could feel as If someone was throwing daggers at you two. "Mubo's gonna kill me" you thought to yourself. He told you thousand times not to flirt with his friend's, but it was always the other way around!

The kiss was kinda long and you enjoyed it not gonna lie. You felt like you've sobered up a bit, because just then you realized you really kissed Zimo and everyone saw it. By the looks on their faces you could tell which 2 of them liked it the least.

You smirked at both of them, finishing another drink while still looking them in the eyes.

"Enough, we are leaving" Fen suddenly got up motioned you all to follow him.

"You fucked up kiddo" Mubo whispered to you.

"W-What did I do?" you gave him a questioning look.

"You go home I'll go with Y/N" Fen told the boys and they all waved you goodbye. You hugged your brother when he whispered again

"Be good" and smirked at you. What is he trying to tell you? Honestly you were confused.

The little walk to your apartment was well.. awkward. Neither of you said anything, the only interaction was indirect from Fen glaring down at you.

"Uhhh" you decided to speak up

"What's this all about?"

He didn't say a thing for a few minutes.

"I don't like when you do things you shouldn't"

"Excuse me?" you asked confused.

"Why did you kiss him?" he asked looking deep into your soul as you reached you apartment. Then it hit you. He was jealous. You smirked at him

"Because I wanted to. What you gonna do about it, old man?" you said the last part were more seductively than you've planed, but oh well.

Fen's eyes darkened as he pinned you onto your still locked apartment door.

"Open it" he said in a low voice being way too close to you. You obeyed and opened the door, letting both of you in. Fen took no time and pinned you against the door again.

"Don't you dare to kiss him again" he looked down at you

"Okay, but can I still kiss Peiyao tho" you smirked at him. He didn't seem amused though. He kissed you with so much force you hit your head a bit, but it didn't stop him from giving hungry kisses.

"Only person you can... kiss is... me" he said in between kisses. A moan escaped your lips, making Fen smirk against your skin.

His hands traveled to the hem of your shirt and then pulled it over your head. You did the same thing to him, your hands traveling over his toned body.

Quickly he stripped you off your clothes, leaving you completely naked. Qin Fen was kissing your exposed body everywhere, leaving marks all over your neck, then collarbone, then boobs. You moaned into the feeling of him sucking your boobs, which made him smirk. He pressed himself harder onto you, feeling his bulge on your thighs. Your hands quickly traveled to unbuckle his belt.

"On your knees" he said in a low voice. You obeyed and pulled his pants and underwear down while sliding on your knees. You smirked at his size going unnoticed by Fen.

"Like what you see?" you looked up at him and took his member inside your mouth, licking and sucking everywhere. Fen moaned as he bucked his hips further into your moth making you gag.

Qin Fen knew he was close, he pulled himself out of your mouth and made you stand up by pulling your hair.

Still standing by the door, he slammed you against it again and attacked your lips, meanwhile positioned himself at your entrance. Fen grabbed your legs, put them around his waist and slammed himself inside you. He didn't give you any time to adjust, just kept a rough pace.

"F-Fuck" he moaned against your neck, giving it a bite.

"Let me cum please" you managed to moan out as he went faster and rougher as before.

"Ask nicely" you felt his smirk against your skin

"D-Daddy please let me c-cum" you screamed out.

He didn't say anything and slammed himself into you harder. His thrusts became sloppier which meant he was close. Hid moans became louder, mixing with your own. Both of you came together, panting and looking at each other.

"Well" he smirked.

"Your brother is gonna kill me"

"Oh? Are we gonna see a senior fight?" you smirked back at him, but he didn't seem to like it.

"Say it one more fucking time" his hand appeared on your neck, as he whispered in your ear

[thatssokatsuki]

Boys Will Be Bugs || Katsuki Bakugo x Reader

Pairing: Katsuki Bakugo Song: Cavetown - Boys Will Be Bugs Summary: You have a crush on a particularly ...fiery... ash blonde boy, and little do you know that under all that agression lies a big softie,  Warnings: Fluff, cliffhanger (because i can) Word Count: 3,009 A/N: If you’re on mobile, I’m so so so sorry, not all of the formatting is crossing over ㅠㅠ

I'm a dumb teen boy I eat sticks and rocks and mud I don't care about the government And I really need a hug

Its your first day at UA and you can’t believe that you’ve actually made it! Its what you’ve always wanted to be part of the hero course ever since you were little, so it meant so much that you’re actually here. You were even more surprised to find that you were put into class 1-A, and be a student under Eraser Head. Little did everyone know, he was actually you’re favorite Pro-Hero. You had always thought his quirk was the coolest and that he didn’t need to be in the limelight, and rather that he just wanted to help people. He was what most would call a true hero, rather than one that just went into the business for the publicity or the money. He was never the #1 hero in terms of the public eye, but he was the #1 hero to you, which is why you were so excited for your first day! What you didn’t expect however, was how strict of a teacher he would be, nor that you’re class would have a very... headstrong student amongst them, and you were only really using that term to be nice. If you were to describe him honestly, you thought he was a major asshole. You’ve come to find during the first assessment test, that happened on the first day no less, that his name was Katsuki Bakugo, and it seemed like he had an ego sky high and a hatred for almost everyone. He hadn’t even properly met everyone in the class and he was already talking down to them and calling them extras. You were, however, immediately drawn to Midoriya and Ururaka. They were both more your speed, being more on the quiet and friendly side. Later on in the day you became friend with a slightly older boy named Iida, who you found interesting because of how much of a stickler he was, but you also admired his tenacity and intelligence and found him to overall be a really nice guy. In fact everyone in the class was nice! The ones called Kirishima and Kaminari were a bit on the dense side, but they were really funny and seemed like they wanted to befriend everyone. Mina and Hagakure were a bit to hyper for you, but they seemed like major fun, and everyone else just seemed super sweet, even if the Todoroki boy seemed a bit on the colder side and Mineta being an obvious pervert. All this being said, Bakugo (or bakubastard as you would come to call him in the presence of only yourself and your thoughts) stuck out like a sore thumb. He had quite the temper and the quirk to match, and you couldn’t wrap your head around how someone could both have such an inflated ego and be such a dick. Needless to say, you didn’t like him one bit, and couldn’t understand quite why a certain handful would try so hard to befriend him when he wouldn’t even bat an eye at anything other than his own training. 

I feel stupid, Ugly Pretend it doesn't bother me I'm not very strong but I'll fuck you up if you're mean to bugs

Eventually, as time went on, you began to understand. You saw the fire in his eyes and his drive to be his best, even if he wasn’t the best at social interactions. In a way, you began to admire him, albeit from a far,, and you’ve come to realize that there may be more there than you had originally assumed, and you kind of beat yourself up over not realizing that hes more complex than just anger personified. You know you shouldn’t have, but you began to speculate why he was the way he was. Did he have a traumatic backstory? Did he start of being bullied? Was it social standards turning him into such a.. well, to put it plainly, a dick. You also began to wonder what was up between him and Midoriya. He got it the hardest from Bakugo, and it would seem that he doesn’t quite know why either. You never thought you would say this, but you actually want to get closer to the fiery boy.

It's getting cold down here underneath the weather I skipped class to sit with you I really like your spotty sweater,

 Principle Nezu has finally implemented dorms, and you’re both really nervous and really excited! On the bright side, you get to see your friends everyday, but it would also lead to you realizing your crush on Bakugo, which was honestly the last thing you expected. The way you even found out how much you were actually starting to like him, was through a study session that Kirishima invited you to. You were pretty sure Bakugo knew you were coming, but the look of shock on his face said otherwise. “Whats this extra doing here, Shitty Hair?” He asked Kirishima, and if you didn’t know either of them you would swear Bakugo hated him. Kiri responded with a simple shrug and an “I invited them, thought you wouldn’t mind”, which earned a mischievous glance and smirk from Mina that only Kiri seemed to notice. Bakugo huffed and rolled his eyes so hard you thought they would roll right out of his head. “Okay, asshat, what do you need help with?” He asked, almost glaring at you which earned him a look of confusion from you. You simply stated that you didn’t really need help, and that you didn’t know this was gonna be more of a tutoring session. Another eye roll from bakugo lead to a few hours of silence outside of when either he or you answered questions the others had. Everyone ‘went’ back to their dorms, leaving you and Bakugo on the opposite couches in the common area. About half an hour into more silence and small glances you would take at eachother without the other notice finally had Bakugo speaking up almost without thinking. “Hey, asshat, that sweater doesn’t look as shitty as the other one you wear.” You continue staring at your book, eyes wide and hoping that the position you’re in would hide the blush creeping up onto your face and managed to squeak out a “thanks, its new”

if ladybugs are girls How do you make kids together? What's it like in a female world I bet it's just so much better

Mina happened to catch what happened and immediately ran to her room after hearing you close your books and say that it was time for you to get some sleep. Once she reached her room she giggled to herself thinking that her little plan was working. She could tell early on that there was something between you both, and figured that neither of you had caught on to your own feelings. She managed to wrap Kirishima into her plan as well, and considered tonight a step in the right direction. The next day she caught up to you and invited you to a girls night later that evening, hatching phase to of her plan which would be to at least get you to admit your crush on Bakugo even if it wasn’t to him. The hours pass and the girls night is finally here, and thus the boys are left to either go to their rooms or go somewhere else because the common area belonged to the girls for that night, and once it was cleared of boys, the talking began. First it was small pro-hero gossip, talking about studies, just trying to ease into a game of truth or dare. You all went round robin until it was Mina’s turn to ask you the fated question, truth? or dare? You wanting to seem brave answered dare, and were immediately met with a “I dare you... to confess to your crush!” You immediately get flustered and counter her with a retraction of dare and an answer of truth, but you should’ve expected her response to ask you who in which you liked. The girls’ ears all perked up as they looked at you expectantly. You begin to try and explain that you don’t like anyone, but your blush and the way you talk with your hands told them otherwise. You were met with various versions of “C’mon! You can trust us!” So you took a look around to make sure none of the boys could hear, leaned in, took a deep breath and closed your eyes tight. “...Bakugo” you had barely whispered, only loud enough for the girls to hear, and open one eye to see some had gasped and others had their jaws dropped. Mina had giggled to herself, proud that she got you to at least acknowledge that you liked him.

I just turned fourteen And I think this year I'm gonna be mean Don't mess with me, I'm a big boy now and I'm very scary I punch my walls, stay out at night, and I do karate

The days after went on as normal, you sneaking glances at bakugo, and him unknowingly doing the same to you, everyone but the girls and Kirishima being oblivious to at least half of the situation. Mina and Kirishima were still trying to set up phase three, but with everything happening they hardly had time, as the days went by fast with hardcore training, and the risks of another villain attack on the school, and with the upcoming provisional hero license test, all of 1-A was so hyperfocused on making sure they can pass. Bakugo was still an ass as per usual, but that was normal, he just seemed a bit more.. different with you. Yes there were more huffs and annoyed side glances, but he was just subtlely more chill with you regarding his words, although the only ones that would notice that are his close friends. 

Don't message me 'cause I won't reply, I wanna make you cry Ain't that how its s'posed to be? Though it isn't me Boys will be bugs right?

Another side effect of how hard everyone was training, was that Bakugo was training so hard, even in his room, that he usually left everyone that texted him on read, but you were none-the-wiser as to why. You were honestly scared that he had found out about your crush and started avoiding you, not knowing that he was doing that to pretty much everyone. At this point, its important to mention that you were considered part of the Bakusquad which is why you even had his number in the first place. With that being said, Bakugo didn’t even notice most of his texts, or that they were even from you. He had so much going on that all he wanted was to just get stronger and pass the upcoming exams, and he had a lot on his mind with his recent abduction by the League of Villains. He wasn’t considering joining them or anything, but rather he blamed himself for that happening, thinking he wasn’t strong enough. So all his time went into training and only training,, justifying his recent lack of communication with his friends and you to “I’m going to be #1 so I don’t need anyone else.” “I don’t have friends.” “All that matters is my training.” etc. thinking no one would really care about his absence as long as he was in class.

I'm a dumb teen boy All I wanna do is quit My mum told me that she's worried And I couldn't give a shit I have friends who understand me Their names are spider, beetle, bee They don't say much but They have always listened to me

With time, Kirishima, Mina, and Kaminari managed to work their ways back into Bakugos life, Kirishima being the one he allowed the closest. He didn’t talk about his feelings at all, but they managed to get a better read on him and understand him more, if that was even possible with how little he let them know about his personal life. All they would know are little bits and pieces like “my mom and I argued over the phone today.” “The league is getting more popular and I need to beat them” “Those damn assholes trying to make everyone hate heroes.” They can see hes getting tired though, because of how hard hes been pushing himself. Mina and Kirishima specifically want to tell him to get over his ego and start spending more time with you, but they know its not the time yet, but they hope that this doesn’t last. 

The other boys at school Think it's cool to hate your parents But they're lying all the time The bugs advised that I should let 'em And if you wanna cry Make sure that they never see it Or even better yet Block it out and never feel it

On your side, although Mina and the girls promised he doesn’t know, you’re still scared and started trying less and less to even start a conversation, and it was apparent to Mina and Kiri that both you and Bakugo were suffering for it. You weren’t as cheery and he was a lot more... grumpy than usual, almost sad. The quiet between you both becoming more and more apparent as each day passed, both of you blaming yourself, thinking you had screwed up somehow. You thought your crush was too obvious, and he thought that he may have been to harsh on you. So he tried pushing forward on his own path even more, just as you did. 

I just turned fourteen And I think I know everything Don't mess with me, I'm a big boy now and I'm very scary I punch my walls, stay out at night, and I do karate Don't message me 'cause I won't reply, I wanna make you cry Ain't that how it's s'posed to be? Though it isn't me 

At this point, it would take a miracle for that rift to repair itself. Luckily that miracle had a name. Two in fact, but if anyone was paying attention, they would know what those two names are. Mina and Kirishima finally managed to put together phase three, although its.. going to be a lot of work. First they have to get you both to believe that you still had a chance, and then get you guys in the same room and to actually talk to eachother for more than five seconds at a time which will be.. much harder than it sounds. Mina took the task of talking to you and Kirishima talkling to Bakugo. Both of your reactions practically mimicked eachothers except Bakugo insisted there would be no way you wanted to talk to him because of how harsh he is, and you insisted because of how awkward you considered yourself. They both ended up saying that it doesn’t matter and to just have you guys meet them in the common area later that night, not knowing the other would be there. Mina asked you to the kitchen because thats where all the food was, and Kirishima invited Bakugo to the couches for another study session. Once you both were down there, neither could leave because that would go to show that you didn’t want to be even in eyesight of eachother which was the last thing either of you wanted the other to think. Eventually with enough quiet pushing from the other parties, you both decided to walk up to eachother and talk, but he got up before you finally agreed to go talk to him, and when you turned he was a lot closer than you expected (thinking he was still on the other side of the room) causing you to bump into him. 

Boys will be bugs...right?

“Hey..” you both said, after he had helped steady you, and you put a small amount of distance between eachother. “look, I’m sorry.. I thought-” you both stated at the same time yet again. “No you-”, awkward chuckling commences before a brief pause. Mina takes this moment to leave without you noticing and joins Kirishima on the side lines, wanting to see what happens next. You squeezed your eyes shut, a habit you had whenever you had to be bold, and spoke up first. “I’m so sorry, I thought you caught word that I liked you and just didn’t wanna be around me anymore..” His eyes went wide, as did yours. Did he hear you correctly? Did you actually just say that? Suprise, it would seem, jumped you both with the words you had just said. You take another deep breath, gently bouncing your wrist off of the counter a few times before stating that you should probably go, and apologized for making him uncomfortable. As you go to pass him all you hear is one word. “Dont.” He stated, not looking away from where you were. You paused for a second, waiting to hear what he had to say next. “Dont..go. Please?” You looked up at him, and walked back to where you were, looking up at him unsure of what was happening. “I--...” He grimaced a bit, leaving a huff, but you could tell it wasn’t aimed at you, but rather at himself. “You’re an idiot, you know that?” He said, this time looking at you, causing you to furrow your eyebrows, looking confused. He looked back to the side and said three simple words that would change your life exponentially, although you admittedly didn’t catch it the first time. “ilikeyoutoodumbass” He mumbled, a little to quickly if youre honest. “I’m sorry, I didn’t catch that..?” “What are you, deaf? I said I like you too” this time, a bit louder and quite a bit more aggressively. “So.. will you be my girlfriend?” He asked, a lot softer than the previous statement, hesitantly looking into your eyes.

[disasterdeacy]

Lavender Knots

A/N: somehow managed to get this up 4 hours before I said that I would! I’m gonna keep this AN short, but I do want to tell everyone that your recent love and support and messages have meant the world to me, and interacting with y’all has made me smile SO DAMN MUCH! Ilysm <3 Pairing: Present Day!Brian May x Young Reader Word Count: 17.7k (Its 40 pages on word lol how do you write small things?) Summary: The media is cruel, and while Y/N can deal with the pressures and nasty words, Brian doesn’t want her to have to... so, he decides to try and help her, by breaking up with her.  Warnings: A N G S T (soz), Fluff (i’m not a sadist), Smut (oh boy its nasty), Age Gap, mentions of mortality, mentions of suicidal thoughts, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it unless you’re tryna get Bri to give you a baby, in which case, you do you sis), Major FDA Violations.

Throwing down the copy of the daily mail onto your office desk with a huff, you slump in your seat, groaning and picking up your phone to see 2 text messages from Brian. What usually would’ve made your face light up with a smile makes you frown. Since the two of you had started dating 5 months previous, Brian had completely changed your life for the better. You’d practically moved in together after 2 months, not wanting to be apart for a single moment of the time that you had together. Your family and friends had accepted the relationship with mild confusion, but once they saw how much you smiled when Brian was beside you, they understood exactly how you both felt about one another and never said an ill word about the relationship. Surprisingly, Brian’s kids had been very supportive as well, they had been slightly off putting at first, but after an emergency grandkid sleepover, the 3 May children decided you were as incredible a person their father could find, welcoming into the May family with open arms. The media however... had been less than friendly. Which is why today’s Daily Mail article wasn’t exactly a surprise, yet still managed to burn a bit. No woman wants to be called, in not so harsh words, a gold digging whore, for holding her boyfriend’s hand. And based on the text messages that Brian had sent, he wasn’t taking it too well, asking if you would come to his place immediately after work. A nervous pit formed in your stomach upon receiving the message, and stayed there the remainder of the day until you arrived back at his home around 5.

“Bri? Love...” You sit your bag down, wringing your hands as you walk along the foyer, confusion etched on your face; usually Brian was waiting for you at the door.

 “In here, Y/N...” He calls from the living room. He was pacing back and forth by the fireplace for what seemed like hours now, feeling sick to his stomach. He’d been thinking all day after seeing the article—articleS. They were never ending it seemed. He’d tried to ignore them at first but.... they were starting to make sense. Who was he to hold you back the way he was? To tie you down in the worst way? He was old, ancient, dated; he couldn’t give you children, give you lifelong support and stability, couldn’t provide for you. Yes, that last thought alone was proof of how old he was, but... still. Even if you could provide for yourself financially (he had no doubts about that)—a relationship was supposed to be a partnership. Was supposed to be about helping and supporting and fulfilling one another. Any day now could be his last. Perhaps that was being a bit dramatic, but in all honesty? It wasn’t too far from the truth. How long did he have left before he lost mobility, lost his mental state, lost HIMSELF?

And you’d be stuck with him. No. No, he wouldn’t do that to you. He couldn’t. The thought was unbearable. Smiling a little when you hear his voice coming from the living room, you quickly head in there as soon as you’ve taken your shoes off. “There you are, I was beginning to think you’d ran off.”

Trekking over to him, you move to wrap your arms around him like you did every single day, only to have him flinch away and turn towards the fire, his hand on his chin, eyes glassy with the tell tell sign of unshed tears. The action sends your  stomach plummeting into your  knees, he’d never been so cold or distant, and every insecurity that you’d buried deep for so long came rushing to the surface.

“B-Bri, what’s wrong?” Your voice sounds pathetic, small, weak, and the complete opposite of your normally cheery and boisterous tone. You reach out for him unconsciously, something you were beginning to do a lot of lately, before realizing what you were doing and holding your arm firm to your side, a cold chill running up your spine despite the heat from the fire. “Please, I-I just.. you’re scaring me...”

He swallows hard, closing his eyes a little, but regretting the movement when tears spill down his cheeks. He doesn’t try to wipe them away—the least he can give you right now are his true emotions

“Y/N, I think... I think maybe we should—should take a step back. From things.”

God, he was pathetic. He couldn’t even say it. Couldn’t even give it to you straight. He loved you so much—this was the last thing he wanted! But he wasn’t good for you. That old cliché “if you love something, let it go?”. He never thought it was true. But... maybe in this situation, it was… In your relatively short life, you’d never had to experience something that had the potential to break your heart, never been subjected to a time when you could physically feel your insides disintegrating, so you didn’t know how it felt.. not until Brian’s words sunk in.

“W-what do you mean take a s-step back.. Bri..” Your hands were shaking, hell your whole body was shaking, you knew what he meant, you knew what he was saying, you just…didn’t want to believe it.

“Y-you’re not... Brian, you can’t do this…” Your voice is heavy and choked with tears, every feeling you’d been subjected to over the past 5 months was crashing through you like a goddamn cannonball, and it wasn’t a good feeling. Everything had been for nothing..

“D-do you j-just not love me? Is that it? Did y-you... was all of this a lie” You can’t even make it to the couch to sit down, collapsing onto the floor as the weight of the situation takes hold.

Brian is  shaking himself. He’s scared to touch you—scared of how you’ll react, of how HE’LL react. So he slowly sinks down to the floor next to you, sitting there, utterly defeated.

“I do love you. I love you more than anything else in my life,” His breath hitches; breaks. He tries to keep speaking.

“I love you more than anyone I’ve ever—" More tears fall, and he stares at his trembling hands.

“I’m no good for you, Y/N. Who are we—who are we kidding? You need someone else. You need things I can’t g-give you. You’re going to be 30, taking care of your boyfriend who can’t walk, can’t think for himself—will I even live to see you reach 40? Do you want to be a 40 year old woman tied down to a 91 year old?? How is that... how is this...”

His voice cuts out, and when he speaks again, it’s more than obvious how much pain he’s in.

“How could I do that to you? How could I let myself just... burden you?”

You can’t even look at him, hurt, betrayal, anger, sadness, goddamn near every emotion is washing through you now, taking your heart and smashing it against a rock. I want to be rational, to talk this out with him, to be an adult… It was obvious that he didn’t want this, that his heart was breaking just as much, if not more, that your’s…but you were just so goddamn HURT.

“Y-you said you w-would never hurt me Brian, you PROMISED that you w-would never I do a-anything to make me cry, a—" The dam breaks and you’re sobbing, hands moving to cover your face as you draw your knees closer to your chest, just trying to hide yourself away from the world, from your own embarrassment.

“I love you Brian, only I g-get to decide what’s g-good for me! I-I can’t believe you’d do this to me... a-after everything...” You feel horrible, more than horrible, because you know he means well, deep down you know that... but you can’t help it. You’re pissed, you’re hurt, and you’re not looking to spare any feelings, no matter how much you love and care for Brian.

“Fuck you Brian.. goddamnit, I gave you everything I had, and you j-just... I hate you..”

Its immature, not poetic, and certainly not something you’d ever thought you would say to him, but it’s what you were feeling, and those feelings were valid. Before you even know what you’re doing, you’re standing up on shaky legs, basically running to the door, somehow having enough of a mind to grab your purse before walking right back out into the cold London air, your tears nearly freezing against your cheeks.

Brian flinches at your words, a small sob bursting from his chest. He just sits there; why should he stop you? You hated him. You HATED him. The words kept echoing through his mind. He’d been right—he was bad for you. This proved it. He hurt everyone he ever loved. Every time he tried to do the right thing.... He’s suddenly overcome with a wave of nausea, and he fumbles for the wastebin that was luckily over to the side of the wall. As soon as he gets it in his hands, he’s throwing up into it, his stomach emptying itself. He just feels completely numb. He knows he’s still crying but he can barely feel it; can honestly barely feel anything. Not the heat of the fire, not the hard ground below him hurting his legs. All there is in his head is your words. He can’t even fucking move.

You don’t even know how long you’ve walked for, tears streaming down your cheeks. You were hurt, betrayed, gutted, and immensely guilty at what you had said to Brian. He had been through so much in his life, had lost so many people, he didn’t deserve to be told that someone hated him.. he didn’t deserve that from you, not even when he’d hurt you so badly… You knew why he had said what he did, why he wanted to end your relationship, and if you had just stayed and talked it out with him rationally, like an adult, the two of you would’ve been eating dinner together now. But instead, you’re walking up the stairs to Roger’s house, surprise etched onto your face at the fact that your feet had led you to Brian’s best friend’s door. The two of you had developed an incredible relationship over the span of you and Bri’s, and you knew that you could come to him if anything went wrong, but.. you still felt bad for doing this. When you buzz the gate, he’s outside within 30 seconds, noticing your distraught appearance and quickly ushered you inside, holding you close as he can while you cry. He asks no questions, just comforts you with his embrace before settling you into a guest room.

Brian sits on the ground for a long time—until the fire dies down at least. His phone rings several times, and he can see that it’s Roger, but he doesn’t answer. He’s literally just staring off into space. He feels pathetic and shitty and horrible—but he’s not thinking that because he feels that way. He’s thinking it in the sense of being a horrible person. He knows he should get up and brush his teeth and shower and maybe eat something, but it’s like he can’t. He hasn’t felt like this in... well, he knows when. But thinking about that makes everything worse. The thought crosses his mind that he has nothing to live for anymore, but his logical brain knows that’s not true. That it’s just the depression talking. That he still has his kids. His grandkids. Roger. Unless they all take your side. He wouldn’t blame them if they did.

There had never been a moment in your life where you’d cried yourself to sleep as fast as you did that night. As soon as your head had hit the pillow, the floodgates opened again and every horrible emotion you’d felt that day came rushing right back. You were nauseous, throwing up into the toilet of the en-suite bathroom three times before you managed to calm down. You can hear Roger downstairs, and for some reason just knowing that you weren’t alone was comfort enough. You somehow managed to crawl back into bed despite the debilitating pains in your stomach, head, and chest. This was never a situation you’d thought you’d find yourself in, not with Brian, you’d been so strong and sure in the relationship. Sure, you had only been dating for 5 months, it felt like you’d known him your whole life.. you had been waiting for a proposal any day now…but now.. now it was just over. By some miracle, you manage to fall asleep that night without any nightmares, because for once, your reality was scarier than anything your mind could dream up.

When Brian finally hauls himself up off the floor, his joints creak and bones ache. He gets rid of the mess in the wastebin, and heads upstairs to his bedroom. He showers, doing his best not to eye the razor sitting inconspicuously in the corner. He needed to shave, but didn’t want to chance anything. He wouldn’t backslide; not that far. Still, he doesn’t allow himself to eat after his shower is done. It’s some level of self punishment he’ll allow, even if he shouldn’t. His phone is still ringing off the hook so he finally answers. It’s not very polite, his telling Roger to fuck right off and stop calling him. He knows he sounds absolutely horrible, but... that’s who he was, wasn’t he? A horrible person, who didn’t deserve you in the first place, and definitely doesn’t now.

The first thing that registers when you wake up is that it’s still dark out, and your head is pounding worse than any hangover has ever caused, probably because you’d cried yourself into dehydration. Checking your phone, you’re a little shocked to see that it’s 4am, and that you had about 400 missed calls and texts from Louisa. The sight makes your  heart shatter even more, knowing that you and her father were over... Sighing, you sit up in bed, smiling a little at the Panadol and water that Roger had left by your bed before throwing it back and getting out of bed. Your legs are wobbly, but you needed to do something. You were stronger than this, you had to be the strong one in the relationship relationship, you always had been.. and when you read the texts from Louisa, that Roger had called her, that Brian wasn’t answering any of her phone calls or the door to their house, a sinking pit forms in your stomach, one that you’d only felt the time you’d had to pull your best friend out of the bathtub.. Quickly opening your Uber app, you grab my things and head downstairs, shooting a text to Roger thanking him for everything before you walk out the door, locking it behind you. You hoped that he was strong enough not to do what you were fearing, and you desperately hoped to god that the Uber driver didn’t mind breaking a few laws.

Brian is still laying curled up in bed even after he wakes up, the drapes still closed, everything dark. His stomach was screaming at him to eat something, but he didn’t think he could bring himself to if he tried. He just kept thinking about everything—your words, your crying, the look on your face. You’d been so... angry. God, it made his stomach curdle again just thinking about it. He’d left his phone unplugged, and all the ringing and messages had eventually caused it to die.

 Thankfully Roger’s London home wasn’t too far from Bri’s, and the Uber driver could obviously tell that you were distressed, and kindly stepped on it. Once you were at the front door, after a quick thank you, you shakily pull the keys from your bag, unlocking the door before going to turn off the alarm, only to realize it’d not been turned on. Furrowing your brows, you sit everything down on the dining room table before moving around the first level of the house, searching in vain to find Brian, and with every room you exited with no sign of him, the pit in your stomach grew. You don’t even know how you’d managed to climb the stairs with your legs shaking the way they were, but once you reach the upper landing, you take a deep shuddering breath and head towards Brian’s room, pausing outside the door, just trying to prepare yourself for what you might find. However, what you find is better than the alternative, but still breaks your heart; well, the shards that were left of your heart. Brian was lying still on your side of the bed, curled around your pillow, his body shaking with sobs you weren’t even sure he knew were happening.

“B-Bri.. love…” Your voice is soft, you don’t want to scare him as you tentatively approach the bed.

He barely registers your voice; it literally doesn’t even compute in his brain. It’s not until he sees you that he blinks up at you, frowning, trying to process what he’s seeing. He feels light headed honestly. He was probably dehydrated from crying and puking, and weak from having not eaten.

“I—Y/N? What’re y’doing here?” His words are literally slurred, and he’s embarrassed by how rough he must look.

You can feel the familiar sting of tears threatening to cloud your vision as you look down at Brian. He had obviously taken a shower, which was good, but he was as pale as a ghost, shaking all over, and based on the way his body was curled up against your pillow, he was just as upset and distraught as you were, probably more. Sighing, you drop to your knees beside him, brushing a shaking hand through his hair before resting it on his cheek, swallowing hard, not wanting to scare him or give him any other reason to feel shitty. “I-I couldn’t just leave you like that Bri, I was horrible to you, said things in anger that I never should’ve said... that I never meant..” Your voice cracks a little, worry and pain working it’s way back inside of your chest.

“I should’ve been m-more mature, not walked out like that.. we needed to sit down and talk this out, and instead I-I just blew up and hurt you so much…” Leaning down and place a kiss to his cheek, your tears start to fall.

“I don’t even know how to begin going and asking for your forgiveness.”

He shakes his head weakly, lightheaded as he does so. He’s shivering, freezing cold even under his thick duvet. “I d-deserve it. I deserve for you to h-hate me. I hurt you—m’not good for you, I...” He hitches out a breath, though it’s more like a sob. He curls further in on himself, party hoping you’re just his imagination; that maybe you actually do love him after all. That you can convince him that none of it matters except their love for one another.

“Oh Bri, look at me honey, please…” He doesn’t, only shoves his face further into the pillow, body shaking with sobs, the sound making your own tears fall heavily, clouding your vision.

“I love you Brian, I don’t hate you, I n-never could.. I was angry, and hurt, but I don’t hate you…” He only cries harder, so you quickly crawl into bed behind him, wrapping your arms tight around his body, pulling him as close to you as you possibly could, just wanting to comfort him.

“You don’t deserve for me to hate you, you don’t deserve for anyone to hate you honey, I love you so much, and I’m so so sorry I acted like that…” Your stomach was hurting something fierce, like 10,000,000 tiny knives of regret were stabbing you over and over.

He turns and just clings to you, sobbing into your neck, fear and anxiety and worthlessness all mixing together inside of him. He hates himself for hurting you, for clinging to you, for being so goddamn pathetic. But he’s crying so hard he can’t breathe, and he doesn’t deserve your arms around him but he somehow has them.

“I- l-love y-you” It is all he manages to rasp out between sobs, his hands clutching your back so hard he is sure bruises will form… another reason for him to hate himself.

You breathe a small sigh of relief, squeezing him tighter as you sit up against the headboard so he can breathe better, your lips pressed firmly into his hair, your hands brushing up and down his naked back.

“Shhh, it’s okay Brian, I’ve got you honey, you’re okay.” Your tears are still falling, being absorbed by his curls.

“I need you to breathe for me honey, in and out, in and out.. cmon Bri, I don’t want you passing out, it’s okay…” You start to rock him back and forth as you talk softly to him, just wanting him to calm down enough to where you knew he wouldn’t have a panic attack.

“I-I-Im s-s-so-sorr-y.” He is shivering, trying to following your breathing techniques, trying to get ahold of himself. Jesus, he was so pathetic. “I l-l-love y—" He can’t finish it, his chest clenching painfully, which scares him. He couldn’t have a heart attack now; it was the absolute worst time. So he starts frantically trying to do the breathing exercises, vision still blurry with tears.

Noticing his panicked expression, the way he’s clutching his chest, you know he was already too far gone to avoid the panic attack. “C’mon Bri, let’s get you in the shower.” The shower was the only thing that you’d found worked on him, would help him calm down.. a nice warm shower. Somehow you manage to get him out of the bed, his arms still tight like a vice around you as you try your best to get him into the walk in shower, turning it on as fast as you can, not even caring that you were fully dressed and he was naked still, more than likely from his earlier shower. “Come here love, breathe baby, look at me and breathe, you’re gonna be okay, I’m not going anywhere.. I love you.” You sit down beside him, taking his cheeks between your hands, eyes level and staring hard into his, breathing in and out to show him how to do it

He just feels like he’s spiraling. Like he can’t get anything back under control. He’s fucking terrified; he’s SURE that he’s dying. That this is it, it’s a heart attack, and he’ll be dead on the floor soon, and you’d be happy about it. And yet, the more you encourage the special breathing, the more he does it, until finally, his brain has come back down to his current state: sitting down under the hot spray of the shower, doing purposeful, structured breathing. He still feels numb, but it’s not.... everything, like it had been

“There we go honey, good job...”

You hold him close, pressing a series of kisses to his temple, his cheeks, his forehead, just trying to ground him in any way you can. His arms are still wrapped tightly around you, holding you like a vice.. you don’t even think he truly realizes he’s doing it.

“I love you so much Brian... I know I sound like a broken record, but I’m so fucking sorry, and I’ll spend the rest of my life trying to help you see how much I love you, how much you mean to me…” Your voice cracks, emotions seeping out despite how hard you were trying to push them back to focus on Brian. “Please believe me Bri, I’m so so sorry, and I love you more than anything...”

“I love you too. I love you, I love you, please don’t h-hate me, please. I know I d-deserve it, but I—I love you so much I only want what’s b-best for you.” He presses his face into your neck, kind of choking a bit on all the water streaming down onto y’all, but he doesn’t care

You turn a little to maneuver it to where the water is hitting your backs, your arms still tightly wrapped around him, head resting on his

“Shh, no you don’t Brian, you don’t deserve me to hate you, and I don’t, I could never.” You start rocking him back and forth like a child in need of reassurance and comfort, which was basically what he was now, desperate for care.

“I know you only said those things because you wanted what was best for me, but you’re what’s best for me Brian.. I was only away from you for 11 hours and I felt like a piece of my soul had been cut loose, I can’t lose you..” You let out a deep breath, trying to steady your emotions. “ H-How can I be what’s b-best for you when I m-make you feel like this!? How can I—" He swallows hard, trying to chill out, feeling humiliated that you’ve seen him like this, but knowing deep down this is what a relationship was supposed to entail; being vulnerable. If you couldn’t see him like this, nobody could. That didn’t mean he felt necessarily good about it, that the thoughts in his brain didn’t try to skew every little ounce of happiness he felt.

“How c-can I be best f-for you when I can’t even b-BE there for you?” His voice is weak and defeated, his true feelings finally coming to the surface after hours of trying to suppress them. Brian’s sobs weren’t as loud anymore, but his voice was still shaky and hitched, and it cut you like a knife to hear his words.

“Bri.. love, yes you made me feel bad, but that’s one time in a whole cornucopia of times you’ve made me feel so much better…” Reaching up, you cup his face in your hands, making him look into your eyes.

“Just because you’ve hurt me once doesn’t mean you meant to, or will do it again.. you meant well Brian, I know that.. I know that you love me and you only wants what’s best...” You try to steady your voice and keep calm, but you can’t help but sniffle at his last words, the weight of them pressing down on your very soul.

“You ARE there for me Bri, you’ve been here for me since the beginning, and I-I love you! I love you so much, please believe me…”

Tears are still falling from his red rimmed hazel eyes, though he’s not sobbing anymore.

“Y/N it’s not... it’s not about now.” He closes his eyes; he can’t look at you, too ashamed and guilty to see the tears and pain behind your eyes. “It’s about later.” He sighs. “I’m 72, Y/N. 72.”

A cold shiver runs up your spine at the implications of his words, tears springing to your eyes as well as you try to push back the thoughts you’d fought for so long.

“I-I know that Brian, I knew what I was getting into when I decided to love you...” You grasp his hand, the action shaky and unsure, your poor heart aching.

“I know we won’t have forever together, t-that I m-might only get 20 years tops with you, b-but I don’t care Bri, I would rather spend 20 minutes with you than 50 years with someone else.” The sob you’d been trying to choke back finally manages to release itself, and you have to duck your head to keep him from worrying. He already had enough to worry about without you blubbering.

“I-I love you, I love you more t-than I’ll ever be able to love anyone else, a-and I-I just, I want to spend every single m-moment we have together loving y-you.”

The older man is  quiet, listening to you. He doesn’t know what to think; what to believe. He knows his own brain—his own thoughts—are intruders. But it makes everything so much harder. He just wraps his arms around you tightly, eyes clenched shut “I’m s-sorry. You deserve better.”

His voice is quiet, hopeless. He just... doesn’t know what to do. He wants you, but feels selfish for doing so. Doesn’t want to push you away, but isn’t that the responsible thing? Or is his mind just tricking him into thinking that?

You just sob harder when he pulls you close, resting his head on yours as you bury your face into his chest. You’re clinging to him like he’s the only thing keeping you connected to gravity, because in a way he is. The two of you stay like that for a while, you sobbing, him holding onto you for dear life, but after god knows how long the water starts to run cold. Sniffling, you reluctantly pull away from Brian, standing on wobbly legs to turn the water off, clothes absolutely saturated.

“W-well, guess I don’t have to worry about washing these later.”

You try to make a joke, chuckling lightly. Brian just stares at the tiled floor of the large shower, and you can practically see the gears turning in his head. Sighing, you crouch down beside him, taking his hand in yours. “C’mon honey, let’s get you dried off and in bed while I go make you some toast okay? I know you haven’t eaten…” He never ate when he got like this, and it was something that scared you tremendously.

He sniffles, struggling and stumbling to get to his feet “Don’t wanna eat.” He’s quiet, his eyes trained on the ground

“I don’t want you to have to take care of me. Don’t wanna be a burden.” Swallowing hard, his stomach curdles again. He has to stop moving; has to balance himself against the wall, otherwise he knew for a fact that he would collapse. “I’m sorry.” He repeats again, wincing when you sigh at him.

“And I’m sorry for apologizing.” His voice shakes, he’s shivering from the cold, and you immediately head over to him, rubbing his arms with your hands, just trying to create some friction/ “I can—I’ll s-stop.” He’s a little dizzy, but still, he moves to grab two towels, one for you and one for himself.

“Here, Brian, just—just let me help you.” You rush to the door, grabbing the towels from him and wrapping him tightly in one. He winces and flinches away from you, making your stomach churn involuntarily.

Stepping  in front of him, you grab his biceps a little harder than necessary, well actually it was the proper amount of force that Brian needed to pull him out of his mind, but you still felt a little bad for the bruises you would probably use.

“Brian. Look at me, and listen to me okay?” Your eyes are hard and stern, you only want to be soft and sweet to him, but sometimes when he would get too far into his head, he needed hard. “You. Are. Not. A. Burden.. you don’t have to apologize for how you feel, you NEVER have to be sorry for how you feel... I love you Brian, I am your girlfriend, your partner in life, and I am going to stay right here, beside you, for the rest of our lives.”

His breath hitches, fresh tears somehow filling his eyes. He winces a little at your grip, but doesn’t really mind it, even if it’s bruising. He just nods, wordless. It’s silent, and then he finally stutters out a word. “O-okay.” he swallows. “I’m sorry—" he cuts himself off, wincing at his automatic apology. “I mean— I’m trying,” it’s stupid to say. He knows words are empty without action. “I love you, too.”

“I know honey, I know you’re trying.” You smile at him gently, moving your hands from his arms up to his face, thumbs rubbing the tears away from his cheeks. “I love you, and I’m going to help you okay? I’m not going anywhere, and you’re never going to be alone in this.” You sniffle, willing your tears away. He’s shivering in the cold, the fluffy towel doing nothing to warm him.

“Come on honey, come lay down.. it’s late, well, early… but, you... you need to sleep.” You grab his hands gently, bringing them to your lips to kiss. “Please?” Your words are desperate, you just want him to be okay, that’s all you ever want.

He nods, letting you pull him back into the bedroom. He’s quiet as you dry him off, his hands on your shoulders to balance himself. He feels... brittle. Like one false move and he’ll break into a million pieces. When you come back from throwing the towels in the hamper, he speaks “Will you... would you stay?”

Nodding gently, you strip out of your clothes before slipping on one of Brian’s oversized sleep shirts. “Of course honey, here...” You bring back the covers, sliding in and pulling him in beside you. “Come here Bri, let me hold you.” He nods and sniffles, wrapping him up in your arms, pulling him close to your chest.

Brian cuddles in close, clinging to you. He’s naked and cold, and essentially tries to bury himself into you and the blankets. He ducks his hands under your shirt, trying to warm them against your skin. You smelled good; smelled comforting. He lets out a shuddering breath, his body slowly warming up.

You shiver a little at Brian’s touches, smiling when he curls in deeper “There ya go baby, just let go.” You drop a kiss to his head, sighing deeply as his hands move up to cup your breasts, your heart pounding at the simple motion.

“You okay baby? What do you need me to do for you honey?” You speak gently, hands moving up and down his naked back

“I need—" He shivers, hands squeezing your breasts gently. “Need you to punish me. He murmurs the words, embarrassed. He doesn’t know how to explain it. His brain was working nonstop, all sorts of negative thoughts and horrible feelings settling in his mind. He couldn’t hurt himself—knew he shouldn’t. That’s what he used to do, when he was younger, when things got bad. But, maybe this would work.

You freeze your movements, eyebrows raising into your hairline at his words. “A-are you sure honey? Are you up for it?”

You were definitely concerned about why he was asking this of you, but you also knew that when he got into this headspace, one thing that helped bring him out was intimacy, but this? Trailing your hands up to his face, you tilt his eyes up towards you, concern written clearly on your face. “Brian, I-I need to know you’re not asking this because you think you deserve to be hurt.. I want to help you, b-but I need you to know that you don’t deserve to be harmed because of how you feel.”

He swallows hard, looking up at you warily “I don’t know about what I deserve but... it’s what I need.” He quiets.

“I need you to hurt me. I can’t do it myself, and it—It’s the only thing that... that helps,” He feels ashamed of his words; of himself. But this was the best alternative to other things. “you don’t have to if you don’t want to.”

You quickly sit up, brushing your hands through his hair. “Hey, it’s okay Bri, I just—I wanna make sure you are sure and you’re okay with it.” The idea of him hurting himself made you nauseous, and if you could do something, anything... to help him feel better and more at ease, you would do. “I want to help you, wanna do whatever you need me to do honey.” You move to straddle his hips, running my hands down his chest, scraping my nails over his nipples, trying to build up to the punishment. “Now... tell me what you want baby, how do you want mommy to punish you…”

He whimpers, back arching up into your touch. He lets out a shuddering breath, trying to think.

“I—I don’t—" He swallows, throat clicking. He wants to feel something, wants something sharp to cut him out of his head

“... spank me.” He flushes, embarrassed at his request.

You can’t help but let out a deep moan at his words, your hands moving to his face to bring his lips up to yours.

“That’s what you want honey? You want mommy to bend you over her lap and spank you for being so naughty?” Speaking against his lips, you bring his bottom lip between your teeth, biting down gently. “Can’t believe you’re such a little slut for me Brian, I can already feel your cock throbbing just imagining my hand on your pretty little ass.” He whimpers, nodding quickly. “Please. I wanna—wanna feel your hands on me—' His breathing is a little shallow, his cock chubbing up despite itself. “Want it to h-hurt to sit down tomorrow. Want to have w-welts.” He’s blushing; he’s never asked for something like this from anyone before. Sure, maybe he’d been dommed, but not this.

“Oh baby, you’re gonna regret asking this...” You smirk wolfishly, sliding off of him, making sure to drag your naked cunt over his cock, pleasure and pride filling your stomach at the whimper that leaves his mouth.

“Come here slut, lay down on my legs...” He eagerly does as you say, rutting his cock against the mattress. “No sir.”

You bring your hand down hard on his ass, biting your lip at the sound the clap of skin makes. You’d dommed him before, been really rough, but never once had you hurt him because he was desperate for it. “You don’t fucking move understand? You don’t deserve to get any pleasure do you? You only get to be spanked like the little whore you are.”

 “ N—No. No, I don’t deserve it. I don’t.” He stutters out, grabbing a pillow and pulling it over to him, shoving his face into it. He clings to the fabric, spreading his legs a little, trying to get into a position he could hold. Please—Please, Y/N— Please, Miss!”

The title sends a rush of arousal in between your thighs, a small moan escaping your throat as you bring your hand down again, harder than before, smirking when he whimpers into the pillow.

“God Brian, you’re such a goddamn slut, look at you all spread out for me to spank.”

You slap his cheeks harder and harder with every go, feeling a little bad about it, about causing him pain.. but, you fucking loved it, loved how hard he was clenching the pillow

He cries out into the pillow, trembling all over, but moaning all the same. He feels messy and dirty and nasty and he loves it. “Fuck, Th-thank you, Miss. I’m a little s-slut. That’s a-all I am.”

He shifts again, trying to move further into your lap from where he was slipping a little. His legs slip open a little more, just as your hand aims for his lower cheek, and as a result, half of your slap lands across his balls. He cries out louder than before, tears springing to his eyes—and yet, he’s never been so hard in his life. “Oh f-fuck—"

Your eyes widen and your persona drops just a fraction, concerned for Brian. “Oh god, honey are you o—"

He’s whimpering and rutting again, his breathy moans going straight to your cunt. “You liked that didn’t you you little whore? You liked me slapping your balls?”

He just whimpers and nods, biting down on the pillow to stop his noises being too loud, which you were having none of. Reaching over you grab his chin and turn his face towards you, your eyes stern, voice hard as you grab hold of his balls in a grip that was just borderline mean.

“Don’t you EVER cover up your noises honey, I wanna hear how hot you are for me.” One firm smack on his ass later and his voice is choking out a sob, begging for more.

He feels dizzy, but in a better way than he had been feeling. He sobs out your name, his hips moving against his will, trying to rut his cock against your thigh. Each movement of his hips caused you to tug on his balls, which were still stinging from the slap earlier. His ass felt like it was on fire, but he loved it. “P-Please... Please!”

His whole body jerks when you spank him again, and he gasps out your name once more. “Y/N I—Oh fuck, I might c-cum—"

Pride swells inside of you, knowing that you had this effect on him, that he trusted and loved you enough to be so vulnerable with you. “Yeah? You gonna cum just from me spanking your slutty ass?”

You start to deliver blow after blow, one hard slap after another, rotating between pulling on his balls and slapping his ass. “Of course you are baby, or course you’re gonna cum just from this.. goddamnit you just love being punished by me don’t you honey, just love having your little man cunt absolutely destroyed because you know it’s what you deserve...” You’ve leaned down, whispering in his ear as you continue to smack and tug, knowing he’s close as can be, just hoping to send him over the edge.

Your final words do it, humiliation streaking through him. He lets out a sob, feeling the dirtiest he’s ever felt in his life as his hips jerk, his cock pulsing out cum messily all over your leg and the bedspread. He’s gasping for air, tears blurring his vision so much that he just closes his eyes. His hips continue to twitch, his balls pulsing in your hand.

“There ya go honey, just let go—breathe for me baby…” You run your hands up and down Brian’s back, gently scraping your nails along the slightly tanned skin to try and bring him back to earth. His entire body was shaking, and his hot cum completely coated your leg, only a few drops seemed to have gotten on the bed, which was a miracle in and of itself. You spare a glance down to Brian’s poor cheeks, wincing a bit as you take in just how red and welted they are. You’d need to get him an ice pack and some salve ASAP, but, you couldn’t move just yet, not with him clinging to your legs the way he was. “Baby, you did so good for me, I’m so so proud of you honey.. such a good boy.”

 He’s panting, trying to catch his breath, his head spinning. His ass hurts, but it feels good at the same time. No regrets. And despite his spinning head, his mind feels clearer than it has in days. “Fuck.” He murmurs, wiping his face on the pillow below him. His hand comes down to fumble at you, finally settling on your side. “T-thank you. I love you s-so much.”

 You bend over, pressing a series of kisses to his back and neck, your hands running up and down the cool skin before moving to rest on the hand he’s placed on your hip.

“I love you too Brian, so much…” Taking one last look at his red bottom, you sigh a little.

“C’mon baby, let’s get you cleaned up and then you can lie down and I’ll rub some salve over you okay? I don’t want you being in too much pain.” You make a move to stand, helping Brian do the same as you lead him to the bathroom, cleaning him and yourself up as quickly as you can before grabbing every moisturizer we own, plus making a quick get away downstairs to grab a few ice packs. Returning to the bedroom, you smile gently when you see him standing beside the bed, hands crossed in front of him, a deep red flush from his hairline to his thighs. “Okay honey, you lie down on your tummy and let me take care of you okay? Just relax and I’ll make you feel good…”

He nods, doing what you say easily, happy to follow your instructions. He lays down gingerly, wincing a little but trying to hide it; he doesn’t want you to feel bad.

He jumps at the first touch of your hand to his skin, but soon he’s sighing happily, relaxing into the mattress.

“That feels nice, love. Really good.” He moans softly, your hands lulling him into security.

 You can’t help but feel a little bad about the welts already forming on Brian’s ass, the redness making my heart clench, but seeing how calm and at ease the action had made him gives you a sense of peace... besides, if it helped him, you weren’t about to refuse him.

“If this is going to be a regular occurrence, I’m gonna have to invest in some top notch blister lotion for you honey.” You chuckle lightly, massaging the lavender lotion deep into his red skin, the sounds of his soft moans filling the room.

 He lets out a sound that’s an honest to god giggle, still feeling a little lightheaded, but this time from the subspace he was floating in.

“Maybe that would be a good investment for us, then. Though I like this...” He trails off, as if losing his train of thought, only to speak again after a long pause. “It smells nice.”

You chuckle “It does smell nice doesn’t it? Lavender helps relax you and soothes the skin, it’s exactly what you need honey.”

You keep kneading his ass for a little bit longer, smiling widely at his little noises, loving that you were making him feel good and relaxed. “You want me to get your back too Bri? Since I’m already back here.”

It just seemed logical, that you would continue the massage. It was about 5:30am at this point, and you knew we both needed to sleep, but Brian was loving this massage, and he seemed more relaxed than he had in weeks, so you weren’t about to stop now.

He pulls himself up on his elbows to look back at you, expression open and vulnerable. “You... you don’t have to.”

He feels a bit of guilt creeping in—nothing like the feelings he was having earlier, but... you’d done so much for him, and he’d done nothing for you.

You reach forward, scratching his back gently.

“I don’t mind baby, I wanna make you feel good.” You know he’s reluctant to accept, he always wants to be the one to take care of you, but he just.. he needs to be taken care of, and you didn’t mind “If you don’t want me to, I won’t Bri, but I just wanna make you feel special.” You lean down and place a single kiss to the middle of his spine, the action gentle and reassuring.

He thinks for a moment before settling back down into his pillow, nodding, his curls bouncing a little.

“Okay, love. If you want to, it would—it would feel nice.” His muscles still ached from his long period of sitting on the floor of the living room earlier.

“Thank you. I love you.” He murmurs into the soft fabric under his face, savoring the words, remembering how just a couple hours ago he’d lost the right to say such a thing.

You move your lips up his spine some more, nipping the skin just a little.

“Of course baby.. you deserve it.” You lean back, squirting some of the lotion onto his back, giggling a little when he jolts.

“Sorry, it’s a little cold.” He snorts, shaking his head against the fabric of the pillow. Shaking your own head, you start massaging his back, straddling his lower back as you work on his traps, digging in hard, working the knots out, your brows furrowing at how tense he was.

“Oh my god Brian, you’re so tense.. I’m gonna have to start doing this more often.. can’t have you getting knots like these on tour.”

He grunts a little at your ministrations—they kinda hurt, but in the best way. Just like earlier.

“Well, I’m an old man, lovely. I’m surprised my entire body isn’t one big knot.” He stretches a little, his muscles rippling under his skin, under your hands. “They work themselves out on tour, mostly. At least I’m moving around on stage. Rog has to sit most of the time.”

You have to bite your lip at the feeling of his muscles moving and tightening underneath your hands, your naked cunt still pressed firmly against his lower back. You were praying, for the first time in years, that he couldn’t feel your wetness, that he wouldn’t be freaked out by you being turned on by this.

“If you were one big knot, I’d spend everyday unfurling it for you.” Leaning down, you place a kiss to the back of his head, nuzzling his silver curls just a tad.

“You’re just gonna have to bring me with you to be your personal masseuse then.. I don’t want you “working out” your knots in stage, you need to be cared for... tenderly…”

“Personal masseuse hmm?” He chuckles softly, sounding thoughtful.

“Sounds like that’s a job that benefits you more than it does me.” He teases lightly; it felt like every nerve of his was alight, feeling every touch of yours—and he did mean EVERY touch. Besides, he knew by now what you sounded like when you were turned on

“Still, I’d be more than happy to offer you the position. You’re more than qualified, you know.”

Chuckling lightly at his words, you move your hands down further on his back, closer to where you were straddling him, yet you were still leaned over, your lips presses against the back of his neck.

“Yeah? Am I just that good or are you trying to butter me up?” He adjusts himself, bucking up into you just a little, causing your clit to rub deliciously against his back. The resulting whimper was one that you couldn’t keep back, and anyway, your mouth was so close to his ear there was really no sense in you trying to hide it... besides, you wanted him to know now, wanted him to know that you wanted HIM.

He groans at the noise you make; at the soft, warm slickness of your cunt against his skin

“Well I’d say you’re the best damn masseuse I’ve ever had, love. You’ve just got a.... unique touch.” He smirks to himself at his dumb innuendo

“.... here’s an idea. How’s about a head massage?”

You stop your movements, sitting up just a little bit as confusion washes over you at his words…you think you know what he’s saying, but.. you’re not entirely sure “H-head massage?”

You hitch out a gasp as he bucks his back again, your clit caught between his skin and your own. “I-I can g-get the head scratcher if you want honey, if that’s what you n-need.” Your head lolls forward, hitting his upper back, a breathy moan escaping your mouth.

He laughs before wriggling himself around under you. You climb off him in confusion, your brows arched at him. He rolls onto his back for tugging at you again.

“Okay, come back.” You straddle his hips, and his hands settle on your waist

“No, up here.” He tugs at you, urging you further up his body, a little smirk on his face.

“You can put your hands in my hair the way I like, but I want you—" You’re straddling his stomach now, and he pouts, trying to get you up to his face. “—closer.”

You raise your eyebrows, smirk wide on your face when you finally understand what he wants. “Oh really? How much closer?”

You slowly drag my pussy along his stomach, inching your way towards his chest. “Here?” He pouts and shakes his head, pulling you closer to his face. “Hmm... here?”

You slide up closer, your legs over his shoulders now.

He hums as if considering it, his hands squeezing your ass as he arches his neck to press a gentle kiss to one of your thighs.

“Well I’ll admit, I like it. But I think I’d like you even closer.” He smiles when you pretend to act surprised, and he looks up at you through his lashes, Hazel eyes wide and innocent.

“What? You don’t want to be closer?” He lets his head flop back down against the pillows, sighing wistfully.

“Wouldn’t wanna make you do anything you don’t wanna do.”

 You hum in false consideration, burying your hands in his hair, your fingers locking into a few of his curls, tugging gently.

“I mean... I GUESS I can move a little closer…” You do just that, not giving him any warning before you settle your cunt right on his mouth, groaning at the friction.

“T-this close enough f-for you baby?”

He moans, the sound still loud even though it’s muffled by your cunt. His hands move to clutch at your hips, holding you down firmly so he can start licking over your folds. He’s eager and quick to find your clit, latching on and sucking on it while his tongue flicks against the little nub. You tasted so fucking sweet—he wanted more of it

The noise that escape your mouth at his ferocity and eagerness is borderline obscene.

“F-fuck Brian! Oh baby, y-you, FUCK!” You have to move one of your hands to the headboard to keep myself upright, your orgasm already fast approaching thanks to the sensitivity of your clit from your grinding earlier.

“C-cmon Bri, y-you can do b-better than that honey, e-eat me like you mean it.” You loved talking to Brian like this, it always made him go harder and be more intense.

Brian lets out a noise akin to a growl at your teasing words, his teeth brushing over your clit gently before he tugs you closer to him, his tongue pressing into you as deep as he can get it while his long nose nudges against your clit. He moves his head back and forth quickly, curls bouncing, one hand moving from your hip to slap your ass hard. He wants you to cum on his tongue; wants to have you soak his face; wants to taste you for hours.

You’re gasping for breath as he slaps your ass, both of your hands now clenching the headboard so hard that your knuckles were white. Brian’s nose bumps your clit as his tongue digs hard inside of you one final time before the dam breaks, and your orgasm hits you like a goddamn truck. “B-Bri—o-oh my god!” His groans send vibrations through your clit and up your body, pulling whimpers from your mouth as you ride his face, riding your orgasm out as long as you can.

He makes a desperate sound, licking through your folds over and over again, taking everything you have to give him. His hands move your hips to help you ride it out, making you grind smoothly onto his face. He continues until your grip in his hair turns to pushing away, and only then does he pull away, heaving breaths in. Still, he doesn’t let you get far; pressed hot, sucking kisses over the tender skin of your pale inner thighs. He has his eyes shut, a dreamy sort of smile on his face. He loved eating you out; not only did he love pleasing you, but he always actually enjoyed it, too

You all but collapse against the headboard, your  hands gently holding onto his hair as you try and catch your breath.

“B-Bri, I-I.. fuck honey…” Chuckling lightly, you sit up and gaze down at him, a soft and pleased smile on your face. “Help me lie down please? I-I don’t think I can move my legs.”

Brian tosses his head back at your words, laughing joyfully

“Well then that’s a job well done on my part, yeah?” You tug his hair pointedly, and he hushes up, moving to help you lay down beside him. Once you’re all comfy, he curls up around you, on his side. He settles a large hand onto your stomach, splaying his fingers out. He swore if he focused hard enough he could feel your still racing pulse under your skin.

“Thank you for the head massage.”

Burying your face in his neck, you let out a bright laugh, shaking your head at his words. “I’m more than happy to give you a head massage every single day for the rest of time if you want.”

You press a kiss to his neck before sighing and burying yourseld further into the pillows, winding your arms around his shoulders, bringing him closer so he can rest his head on your chest. It’s comforting, being this way with him, and it almost makes you forget the intensity of earlier.. but not completely.

“Ya know, we’re gonna have to talk about what happened earlier right? I think it’s safe to say that we’re not breaking up.. but, we do need to talk about everything…” As much as you don’t want to... but, you were adults and needed to communicate like them.

He tenses at your words, anxiety cutting through his stomach sharply. But he tries to ignore it; to breathe out long and slow and nod

“I know. I know we do.” He’s quiet for a moment before speaking again. “I’m sorry.”

You give him a squeeze, sighing along with him.

“I know honey, I know you are. And there’s nothing for you to be sorry for. You have valid feelings and reasons to be upset and worried.” Your voice is light, you weren’t scared anymore, you knew we would be and stay together… but, you still needed to talk

“You do still want to be with me right? I know that’s probably stupid to ask, but, I just want to make sure that you still want this.. to be with me, have a life with me.”

He’s quiet for a long time after your question, thinking about how to answer. It’s only when he feels you tensing up that he realizes he’s been silent much too long. He rubs his hand over your side, voice soft when he finally speaks, his stomach fluttering nervously

“Y/N, I want to be with you for the rest of my life. No matter how short of a time that will be,” He sighs, “That’s what’s so scary.”

Closing your eyes, you breathe a sigh of relief, relaxing completely against Brian’s body.

“I want to be with you for the rest of your life too Brian, and I-I know that might not be the most lengthy time.. but, it’s still time that we’ll have together, a chance to be with one another until we,” You release a shuddering breath, not wanting to imagine a future without Brian in it, but knowing that in the next decade or so… it could happen.

“But that’s in the future.. and, I could marry someone my age and them die the day after our wedding, or have them develop cancer 5 years into our marriage.. we aren’t guaranteed tomorrow Brian, Hell, I could die on my way to work in the morning... it’s not about how much time we have with someone, it’s about why we do with the time we have.”

He swallows hard, nodding once more.

“I know... I know, you’re right. It’s just... well, no one likes discussing their own mortality I suppose.” He sighs, reaching blindly for one of your hands to hold.

“I should have... have trusted your opinion. It’s not that I didn’t or don’t, I just... I want you to be happy and taken care of. And I’m always worried I won’t be able to—I know someday I won’t be here. And I just... I don’t know. It was stupid I suppose” He drops his head, laughing humorlessly. “If it was what you were feeling, it’s not stupid Brian.. you’re not stupid for being scared, or worrying about me.. it makes me feel loved and cared for, which is all I know you want for me.. I trust you, love you, and appreciate beyond belief the fact that you care so much about me and my well being, that you were willing to sacrifice your happiness...” You squeeze the hand resting on your stomach, wanting to provide him with just a small ounce of comfort.

“You’ve made me so happy just in the short time we’ve been together.. like, I swear to god Brian it feels like you’ve shoved 10 years of love and happiness into 4 months, and—god, I just—I love you so much..”

  He feels a little bit of relief at your words; that you weren’t still angry with him. Sure, maybe your “I hate you” still rang in his head, but he knew it would slowly fade if he gave it time. He brings your hand up to his lips to kiss it softly

“I love you, too, Y/N. More than anything.” His words are quiet and reverent, like a prayer.

You smile gently at him, leaning forward to drop a kiss to his forehead, still feeling absolutely horrific for what you’d said to him, he didn’t deserve that…

“Bri…” You choke back a shuddering breath. “I’m so sorry for what I said to you.. y-you didn’t deserve to have me tell you I hate you, especially when I could never, EVER, hate you. You’ve given me nothing but love and understanding, care and affection... and I-I’ll spend the rest of time reconciling what I said to you…”

He nods, not wanting to think about it, but knowing he had to. “It’s alright, Y/N.”

His voice is still quiet; he doesn’t want you to be upset. He doesn’t want you to beat yourself up over it. He’d hurt you, and you’d said it, and it was all.... in a rush of emotions… something he definitely understood, and he couldn’t fault you for it.

“It’s okay, love.” He pulls away from you just a little, tugging at the covers “Let’s just go back to bed, yeah?”

You still feel like a shit girlfriend, but you know he doesn’t blame you, you know he isn’t holding it against you, and you’re 100% positive that he knows he didn’t mean it...

“Okay, yeah.. bed does sound good.” You allow him to cover you up with the blanket, snuggling up against him.

“Rog’s guest bed is comfortable, but the best bed in the world could feel like a goddamn bed of rocks when you’re not there with me.”

He laughs a little at your words, but then frowns.

“Oh, I should...” He sits up, but makes sure the covers stay tucked over you.

“I’ll be right back, okay? I need to call him. I sort of... yelled at him, earlier.” He barely remembers doing so, but he knows he did.

You try your best to stay awake while Brian calls Roger, but the emotional and physical drainage of the day wacks you in the goddamn face, and before you know what’s happening, you’re falling asleep to Brian’s sheepish voice on the phone with Roger. Brian returns to bed about 20 minutes later, after a rather irritated Roger had given him a dressing down that only his mother’s could rival. He appreciated what his best friend had done for you beyond measure, that he had taken you in and made sure you were safe… he could never repay him for that, and the drummer would never ask him to do so. Curled up in bed next to you, Brian falls asleep in no time, his heart finally healing from the gash that he had inflicted on himself earlier that day. He sleeps for a while, finally waking up around 11:30. So, about 5 hours. Not bad. He’s surprised when he finds you still asleep next to him, though I guess you’d been awake just as long as he had. He lays there for a little bit to wake up more before stretching and getting out of bed. He throws on a pair of underwear and a cozy robe and slippers, trying to keep quiet so not to wake you. Then he sneaks downstairs to the kitchen, digging in his fridge to find something to cook for breakfast, he just felt like he still had a lot of making up to do.

You wake up to the smell of breakfast, tea to be more precise, being made. The smell brings a smile to your face and you roll over and stretch widely, groaning a bit. Grabbing your phone as you sit up, your eyes widen a tad when you see that’s it’s close to noon, and that you have approximately 1350 missed calls and texts from various members of the May and Taylor family. After taking a bit of time to respond to Emily, Jimmy, and Louisa, reassuring them that you and their father were completely fine, you put on a robe and my, well technically they were Brian’s, house shoes and head downstairs. Brian is stood in front of the stove, humming as he cooks, the sight brings a smile to my face as I walk towards him, wrapping my arms around his middle “Mmmm what did I do to deserve this?”

He smiles when he hears you come in; relaxes back into your touch. He chuckles at your words.

“Hmm? Well, you deserve this every day just for existing.” He pauses, flipping over the pancakes he was cooking.

“But specifically? I think what I put you through last night is reason enough for a big, yummy breakfast.” He frowns, sighing, looking down at the pan.

“Although apparently my waffle maker is broken. I guess it’s about time. I think I’ve had that thing since the early 90’s, it’s probably a fire hazard.”

Your eyes widen dramatically and you smack his stomach.

“Brian! You’re an international rock legend, you have more money than the bloody queen, and you’ve been using the same waffle machine for 30 years?” You laugh loudly into his back, squeezing him tightly*

“Could you imagine the headline? Legendary Queen Guitarist and Astrophysics Legend Brian May burns down multimillion-dollar home in Waffle Machine electrical malfunction.”

 He grins, shaking his head, his curls brushing your face.

“Hey, it was a great waffle maker! Besides, they get better with age, I’ve been told. There’s more flavor.” You make a disapproving sound and he grins “Well, Anita and I did have a newer one, but she took it with her. It’s not like I needed it.”

You chuckle and give him one final squeeze, pulling your phone out of the pocket of my robe “YOU got better with age, WINE gets better with age, CHEESE gets better with age… Not waffle makers babe…” Opening up the Postmates app, you tease him while and ordering a waffle iron from Waitrose.

“There, got one on the way now, hopefully one that won’t set your house on fire and kill us all.” You reach up and peck his cheek, showing him the delivery notification.

He pouts when he sees the notification, but leans into your kiss.

“Well I’ll pay you back for that, I swear.” He turns back to the multiple pans on the stove.

“Could you get out some plates? And maybe some drinks? Mimosas sound good, if you’re up for it.”

“You will NOT pay me back for that! A £30 waffle iron pales in comparison to all of the things you’ve given me. Consider it a mutually beneficial gift.” You slap his ass and head to get the plates and cups out, moaning in appreciation of his suggestion for mimosas.

“God yes, mimosas sounds incredible, I’ll make a pitcher?” You shoot him a look of questioning, smiling when he nods. It doesn’t take long for you to run downstairs and get a bottle of Moët, aka the only champagne that Brian drank.. a little cliche but definitely something that made you smile. Bouncing up the stairs, you hyperventilate dramatically, leaning against the fridge

“Okay, with pulp or without?”

By the time you come back up, he’s starting to plate the food. He scoffs at your question. “In mimosas? No pulp please.” You grumble something about him being picky, which makes him laugh.

“Yes mum, I’ve always been picky. That’s what you get with me.” He carries the plates to the little dining area still within the kitchen, before going to get things like syrup and jam and butter.

You shake your head at him, pouring the orange juice into the pitcher, followed by some ice cubes, and the champagne, jumping when the cork pops.

“Ya know, I’m never gonna get used to that.” You mumble it to yourself, but Brian laughs and drops a kiss to your cheek when he passes.

“I guess I’m just going to have to get used to your pickie little ass then hmm? If I’m gonna deal with you for the rest of time, I should get used to the fact that you only like no pulp orange juice and chilled, but not cold, cheese...” You raise your eyebrows at him as you put the pitcher on the table before taking a seat beside him.

He pouts. “Cold cheese is too hard and dulls the flavor, but warm cheese is...” He shudders, before taking his glass from you. “Chilled is the happy medium.” Brian winks at you before sipping his drink. “Delicious. And I hope breakfast suits you. The pancakes have a little cardamom in them this time.”

You give him a look of disbelief, smiling before cutting one of the fluffy pancakes and sticking it in your mouth, groaning in pleasure at the taste.

“Jesus Christ Brian, these are amazing, thank you.” You lean over and peck his lips, mouth still full of pancake.

“I think you should hang up red and just become my personal chef...” You wriggle my eyebrows at him, taking a big bite, throwing your head back while moaning in pleasure, licking the fork.

He snorts. “I wouldn’t make much of a personal chef if all I can really make is breakfast food.” You give him a look and he grins.

“Alright, and noodles. Listen, I lived with three other men most of my life and two of them couldn’t even cook an egg. John was wildly talented in the kitchen, so I didn’t have to be anything special.” He takes a bite of his own, groaning a little.

“That IS good....”

“Told ya so.” You send him a wink, eating as fast as you could, going back for seconds within 10 minutes of sitting down.

“Don’t you dare say anything.. I’m a growing girl, and you made wayyyy too many pancakes for me to only have 3.” You pour some syrup on them, your tongue sticking out in concentration Brian grins and takes a bite of his own food. “I made more because I knew you’d eat them. Plus, who doesn’t love leftover pancakes.” He shrugs.

“I don’t have anything to do today, miraculously. If you don’t either, maybe we could just... have a day to ourselves?” It was rare that the two of you had that, even on the weekends. But the tour was on a little break, and Brian was trying to make the most of it.

“That sounds amazing Bri.” You smile over at him, taking another bite, happiness flooding your body just thinking about the possibilities of what the two of you could do with a whole day to yourselves.

“What do you wanna do? As long as I get to sit in your lap for a majority of the day, I don’t give a shit.” You loved, and I repeat, LOVED sitting in Brian’s lap.. it just.. made you feel safe and loved, plus it didn’t hurt that he usually ended up with a boner, and you usually ended up face down on the couch while he fucked you relentlessly.

He shifts in his seat at your words, smiling a little. Was he already horny just from those words? Yes. Listen, he might be an old man, but his cock still tried to be 20 years old…

“Well we can certainly do that, love. I was thinking of maybe watching a movie or something, and eating ourselves silly, and...” He sighs.

“Well maybe that sounds a bit boring. I just thought we could spend some time together. I miss you, when you’re gone.”

“ Aww, Bri…” You set your fork and knife down, scooting your chair back so you can climb over into his lap. Wrapping your arms around his shoulders, you lean  forward to press a series of kisses to his cheeks and forehead.

“I miss you too when you’re gone.. more than you know…” You sigh, remembering how sad you’d been when he’d gone off on the first leg of the tour, leaving you all alone in the big house.

“Wish there was some way I could come with you, the bed is just so empty and cold when you’re not here with me.”

 He looks up at you sharply, arching his brows at your words

“You—You’d want to come?” He honestly hasn’t thought so. Not because of anything you’d done, but just because you had your own life and career you loved, and touring was hectic. It was a hard life to live; always on the go, never any sleep, night after night. But it was his passion and he loved it. But again, he knew it wasn’t for everyone.

 You stammer a little at his words, slightly embarrassed. Sure you’d desperately wanted to go with him when he left on tour.. but, you’d never brought it up because you didn’t want to make him feel like he HAD to bring you.

“I-I mean, I’d like to.. but, I understand if you wouldn’t like that! You’ve been doing this for 50 years, and you probably have a set way of doing things, and I’d probably just get in the way.”

Biting your lip, you shake your head.

“I have 51 days of vacation from work, a-and I could always use that, but…” You chuckle, scratching his head. “I don’t wanna make you feel like you have to let me.”

 His breath leaves his chest in a big huff, hazel eyes wide “51 days of vacation?? How???” You shrug and he shakes his head.

“Okay, well, we’re definitely talking about that later, but...” He smiles up at you.

“Of course I’d want you on the road with me. You might get sick of it, but you could always go back home if that happens. I—I’d love it if you were there. And I know Rog and Adam would like you there too, and the crew won’t mind as long as you don’t sabotage anything.” He winks.

You breathe a sigh of relief, smiling before pressing your lips to Brian’s, tasting the maple of the syrup he’d just eaten.

“Well, I can’t promise that I won’t destroy the dressing room with you...” You bite his lip gently, smirking when you feel his cock thickening under your ass.

“But are you sure? I don’t want to be in the way or do anything that could cause people to be uncomfortable., it’s YOUR space, somewhere you’re most at ease in your element.”

 “It IS my space, and my world. But I’d like to show it to you and share it to you. I want to share everything with you…” He’s quiet, voice open and innocent.

“I’ve never been able to share it with someone I loved before. Chrissie never liked it, Anita already had her own stage... It’s something I love and I’m proud of and I enjoy, and I’d only love it more if you were there.” Though his words are conversational, he’s gently grinding his hips up into your ass, lids fluttering at the feeling.

Your eyes close at the feeling of him beneath you, your breath hitching in your throat.

“I-I would love to do that Bri.. it s-seems so fascinating and fast paced.. I-I think I would really like it.” You open your eyes, hands going into his hair, tugging his lips towards yours, groaning when his arms tighten around your waist, holding you close.

“Besides, I really wanna fuck you against an amp…it’s not fair how goddamn hot you look on that stage.”

He laughs, wrinkling up his nose a little.

“Fuck me against an amp? That doesn’t sound very comfortable.” He teases, cheeks flushed a little at the thought. He always got amped up after shows, his adrenaline pumping. The thought of fucking you after coming off stage, the crowd still roaring.... fuck, he wanted that.

Noticing the blush on his face and chest, you can’t help but smirk, leaning forward to lick a stripe from his Adam’s apple to his ear, loving the way he shuddered under you.

“No? Well... I guess I can just take care of myself backstage if you don’t want me to fuck you.”

You love teasing him more than should probably be allowed, the way he would stutter and blush, and sometimes just absolutely lose control and fuck you senseless… it was a nice game of roulette.

He clenches his jaw, growling a little

“No you won’t. You’ll wait for me to be done performing like a good little girl.” His hands move to your ass, squeezing gently.

“You’ll wait as long as it takes and you won’t touch yourself.” He hums softly, as if thinking.

“Sometimes I’ll practice beforehand in my dressing room. I’ll turn up the volume and let you ride the amp, if you’re that desperate.” Bingo.. that’s exactly what you had been hoping for.. God, you loved it when he was dirty and degrading with you.. usually he didn’t do this, he felt bad for it.. but fuck did you love it. Biting your lip, you start to grind yourself against his cock, trying to look as innocent as possible.

“But what if I don’t wanna be a good girl daddy? What if I wanna be a brat and make you mad? What if that’s what your baby girl wants?” You have to admit.. riding his amp.. feeling the vibrations from red.. god, it was unlike anything you’d ever imagined.

He slaps your ass, jaw clenching.

“Then you can have your own fucking fingers, and I won’t touch you.” He arches a brow at you. “That’s what you want, right? To get off whenever you want?”

A shocked gasp escapes your mouth at his smack, arousal folding your cunt. “N-no, wanna get off with you, wanna have you fuck me until I can’t walk anymore daddy...”

You clench your eyes shut when he smacks your ass again, a small whimper breaking free. “But I-I wanna be naughty too daddy, wanna be a brat.”

“Well naughty girls don’t get this fat cock.”

You whimper and he cocks his head to the side.

“Maybe I’d fuck your throat. Use you, and then leave you be.” He sighs.

“Because no matter how bad you are, I suppose I can’t find someone else. And I’ve got to get off some way.” He says the words lightly, sighing as if put out, but he squeezes your hip gently, hoping to get across that it’s part of this game you’re playing. That he’d never dream of fucking someone else; never want to. You were it for him, and he knew that you knew that.

You’re genuinely surprised by his words and how insanely hot they’re making you.

“No, daddy, no I’ll be good for you, I promise, d-don’t want you going to find someone else, o-only want you to use me as a cum dumpster daddy.” You whimper loudly, grinding harder, loving the way his robe was rubbing you.

“Only want you to use me to fill up with your cum.. p-please daddy I’ll be good for you, I’ll take every drop.”

He is absolutely breathless, your words making him feel hot all over.

“Jesus, Y/N…” He swallows hard, moaning a little as your roll your hips against his.

“Well you’re not being very good right now, are you? Grinding against me right here in the kitchen. Naughty little thing.”

You bite your lip, hands tightening in his hair.

“I-I’m sorry daddy, I’ll be good, b-but your c-cock is just so fucking addicting, and I n-need you!” You halt your grinding even though you know you’d catch more flies with honey than vinegar.

“W-will you pl-please fuck me daddy? P-pretty p-please? I’ll be so good for you, I-I promise.”

He arches a brow, leaning back in his chair.

“Get off my lap.” His voice is more even than he thought it would be, and he’s thankful for it. You don’t move and he smacks your ass, voice hardening. “I said, get off my lap, Y/N.”

You know that your eyes are probably as wide as saucers, your breath catching in your throat at his harshness, but, you do as he asks, stumbling off of his lap, falling to the ground in your haste to move.

“Shit, I-I’m sorry daddy, I-I didn’t mean to make you mad... I’ll be good I p-promise.” You scramble to get up, only wanting to do whatever you can to please him, to make him know that you would be good.

Brian swallows hard, his head a little dizzy from how much blood was rushing to his cock. Jesus, he was so turned on it wasn’t even funny. And you hadn’t said no, or safeworded out. You were a dream. He scoots his chair back from the table before gesturing to the empty spot in front of him. “Take off your robe and bend over the table. Legs spread.”

You quickly do exactly what he says, shakily taking off your robe and throwing it on the chair you’d previously vacated, leaving you stark naked in front of him. You’re surprised that your legs are actually working, and you stumble your way to the table, bending over exactly as he’d requested, your naked cunt and ass on full display.

“N-now what daddy?” You were so eager to please him, and GOD was this a stark contrast to last night’s events. But that’s what you loved about your relationship with Brian... it was never the same thing, always evolving and always changing.

 He bites his lip, hands coming up to palm your ass before spanking it, watching it jiggle.

“Fuck you look so good like this, honey.” He tugs his robe open, leaning back in his chair and starting to play with his cock.

“What do you want, baby girl?”

You don’t think you’ve ever been so goddamn turned on in your ENTIRE life, the way he was treating you, how rough and dominant he was being? You’d never seen this side of Brian and you were praying to god you never had to go without it ever again.

“W-want you to be rough with me daddy, want y-you to fuck me until I can’t w-walk and c-cum inside of me please” You whimper when he spanks you again, your cunt leaking heavily. “Want you t-to fill me up, I NEED your cum d-dripping out of me please daddy, I’ll do a-anything.” You knew that you should be embarrassed by your begging and desperation.. but you weren’t, not even close.

“God, you’re a whore.” His words are harsh, but his tone is impossibly fond. He sighs, moving his fingers to your dripping cunt, rubbing through your folds.

“You’re absolutely soaked.” He pulls his fingers away before giving your cunt a gentle slap, but a slap nonetheless, much like the slap you’d delivered to his balls the night before.

“O-oh! G-god—daddy please, need your cock!” Your head is firmly placed on the table, hands grasping the corner of the wood as hard as you can without hurting myself.

You had never been so desperate before, usually you were a champion for as much foreplay as humanly possible, but for some reason his attitude and words were just causing you to have a fucking aneurysm.

“Fuck me l-like the dirty little fucking w-whore I am daddy, need y-you to breed me and teach me a goddamn lesson!”

“Breed you?” His voice cracks a little, and he stands, palming your ass, spreading it and your cunt open,

“Want me to fuck a baby into you?” He doesn’t know why he’s saying it, especially when he knows he more than likely can’t do that.

“I’ll bring you on tour with me just to fuck you full of cum every night.” His voice is hoarse as he steps closer, his cock brushing your thigh.

Your noises are pathetic, desperate and wanton.. the kitchen sounds more like a bordello at this point.

“Y-yes Brian, p-please fuck a baby in me daddy, wanna be so full of your cum, and t-then full with y-your baby!” The two of you hadn’t exactly discussed this aspect of your relationship but... you wouldn’t complain if it happened.

“I-is that a promise daddy? You promise to fuck me hard as full every night before and after? I wanna b-be dripping with your cum w-while you’re on stage p-performing for thousands.. me-meanwhile I’m backstage, your cum running d-down my leg...” You press your ass into him, wiggling a little, just trying to get some relief.

He just pushes your legs further apart, making you rest completely against the table. He slips a hand up to your shoulders, pressing against you while his other hand wraps around his cock. He strokes the head up and down your folds, shuddering a little at the feeling.

“Only if you’re good for me, baby girl. You can have all the cum you want as long as you’re good.” He murmurs, teasing at your entrance.

You shudder completely at his words, at the tone of his voice, how his hand feels splayed completely across your back, the way his breath is hot on your neck.

“I-I’ll be good! I-i promise daddy, I’ll be s-so good for you.” You’re near tears at this point, just so incredibly desperate for his cock to be inside you that you can’t control your emotions anymore.

“P-please n-need to feel your cum s-seeping out of me daddy, please, n-need your baby inside of me...”

He can’t take it anymore—shoves himself inside you with one quick stroke and doesn’t let up, not letting you adjust. He just holds you down on the table, one hand on your neck, the other gripping your ass, slapping it every now and then as he absolutely rails you. He doesn’t know where his energy is coming from, but he’s fucking you hard, as if his life depended on it.

“Fuck, your greedy little cunt is taking me so good. You’re such a fucking slut—"

The little scream you let out at his ferocity and sudden intrusion would be enough to garner attention from neighbors if it hadn’t been lunch time on a Thursday. Clenching tightly around his cock, your hands grip the table like it’s the only thing on earth that can keep you from disappearing into the atmosphere. “F-fuck—daddy, y-you’re s-so f-fucking big!” You somehow manage to hitch out the words, your face firmly smashed against the overly expensive wood of the table. Our breakfast was still lying right beside you while Brian went to town on your cunt. He’d never been this hard and rough, but you wanted more.

“C-cmon daddy, y-you can do b-better than that! F-fuck you’re little g-girl’s cunt like you m-mean it!”

 He slaps your ass again, thrusting somehow harder, putting his whole weight into it, grinding a little into you each time. “You’ll fucking take what I give you.” He growls, his hand moving from your neck to your hair, tugging on it, making you arch your back a little.

“Wish I could tie you up all day—leave you open and wanting for me. I can just use you whenever I want. Make a mess of you.” The noises filling the kitchen are obscene, his hips crushing against your ass, going so hard that his balls are swinging to slap against your clit.

 You’re already so close, his cock was pressing deliciously into your g-spot, his balls slapping your clit at a speed and harshness that was sending you closer and closer to tipping over the edge.

“W-want that so much d-daddy, wanna h-have you u-use me whenever you w-want!” You’re trying your best to push away your orgasm, not wanting to cum just yet, and knowing that he probably wouldn’t let you, you had to be good for him, had to do what he wanted…

“D-daddy, I-I’m so close c-can I c-cum all over your cock? P-please daddy?”

 Brian hauls you up a little by your hair, just to let his hand slip over your throat, holding you there, making you balance yourself at an angle where all your weight is essentially onto his cock. Still, he pounds into you, eyes sweeping over the scene you make in front of him.

“You wanna cum already? What a little whore you are.” He makes a disappointed sigh, tutting at you.

“Fine. Cum if you need to. But I’m not stopping.”

The new angle somehow sends him deeper into your cunt that he’s ever been before, his tip prodding your cervix.

“C-cumming for you d-daddy—" You gasp out, his hand closing a little tighter on your throat as you do so, your head leaning back to rest on his shoulder as your orgasm hits you, the intensity of it causing you to genuinely feel like you’re passing out, and you genuinely think you blackout for second.

He curses up a storm as you cum, but doesn’t let up his thrusting. He just plunges himself over and over into you, biting at your neck and shoulder as he lets out strangled moans. He holds you up against him, one hand on your neck, the other on your hip “There’s my naughty girl—just can’t fucking help yourself, can you? God, I can feel you dripping down my balls, even. You’re so dirty.”

 His incessant pounding brings you back to earth, your overly sensitive cunt clenching around his cock again and again.

“I-it’s all for you daddy, m-my cum I-is all yours!” You reach behind you, grasping onto Brian’s neck to try and hold yourself up a little. You can feel his cock grinding and bumping your cervix with every thrust, the noises bouncing off of the overly large kitchen making your cunt tingle even more. You were faster approaching another orgasm, and you knew he was close too, but you didn’t want this to end.

His hands moves from your hip to your clit, rubbing the slick little nub quickly. You gasp and try to arch away from the touch, oversensitive, but you’re literally impaled on his cock. You can’t really move, and he knows it

“Fucking take it, Y/N. You’re gonna take it, and you’re gonna cum again, and maybe then—maybe then I’ll give you want you want.” God, he was so close, his balls tight against his body. It was taking all he had to hang on.

“Y-yes sir, I-I’m g-gonna—" You cut yourself off with a scream, cunt spasming, ejaculation shooting from your pussy, covering Brian’s cock, his thighs, god y-you’d just fucking squirted all over him, in the KITCHEN. It was just as intense as the first orgasm, probably because of how insanely sensitive you already were, your cunt holding his cock hostage inside, your walls tightening around him, the only thing keeping you standing being his arms which were tight around your neck and stomach.

“Oh, fuck—yes, there’s a good girl.” He growls out, eyes rolling back in his head as you squirt all over him, drenching his cock. It’s what he’d wanted; what he knew he could get you to do if he tried had enough. You’d done it once before, completely on accident, and you’d been completely embarrassed and didn’t want to talk about it. But to him? God, it was the hottest thing he’d ever felt. And to feel it around his cock? Well needless to say, he was cumming pretty quickly soon after, still pressed right up against your cervix, coating your insides as his balls pulsed. He moans into your neck, legs trembling, but managing to keep you both upright.

“T-there ya go d-daddy, o-oh my god, f-fuck daddy, f-fill me up!” You gasp and whimper as his cum shoots into you, the warm and strange feeling coursing through your abdomen, filling you completely. God, he’d cum inside of you before, but never this much, he had NEVER cum this hard before...

“G-gonna give me a baby aren’t you Bri? Oh yes baby, god—you’re gonna fuck me full until I’m pregnant baby, fuck!” If it happened, it happened, and I wasn’t going to complain, certainly not if it happened from THIS.

 He just lets out an undignified whimper, hips still rutting into you. He can feel his legs around to give out, so he falls back clumsily into the chair, taking you with him. He lets you rest your head back against his neck as he pulls your legs open, spreading you out. God, if anyone were to walk in right now, you’d be on full display. He groans at the thought, his cock twitching again inside you. He’d never thought about sharing you before—why was he in such a mood today? He sneaks a hand down, fingertips toying with your slick clit, humming when you whimper.

The whimper is weak and barely audible to you, your head lolling to rest on his shoulder, your mouth wide, cunt aching in the best possible way.

“G-god B-Bri I-I’m s-so sensitive...” You didn’t want him to stop necessarily, I mean, his cock was still hard and twitching inside of you... that had NEVER happened and he was.. he was so fucking hard and horny today, and you had no idea what was causing it, but you started to grind against his cock, riding him,.

He coos to you, shushing you softly.

“I know, baby girl. Do you want me to stop?” He presses a kiss to your shoulder gently, just using his thumb to rub up and down on your clit, breath hitching as it makes you squeeze around his cock. He knew he’d slowly be softening, though this was the longest he’d stayed hard in a long time.

You shake your head frantically, whimpering as his fingers continue rubbing you “N-no! G-god no Bri, w-wanna cum on your cock again, w-wanna keep y-you hard a-as long as I c-can!” You knew that he was usually so self-conscious about his ability to stay hard, so you just wanted to make him feel better about himself. You also just wanted to see how many times he could make you cum.

He shudders, nuzzling into your shoulder.

“You’re such a greedy girl.” He murmurs. He’s rubbing your clit quickly, but trying to keep his touch light. He wants to make you feel good, not hurt.

“You’re so good for me, Y/N, love. You’re such a good girl.” He moans, feeling you squirm and flutter around his cock. “You feel so good.”

Your cunt is clenching and quivering around his cock, his fingers softly grazing your clit, and thanks to your previous 2 orgasms, that’s all it takes for your third orgasm to wrack your body, sending you clenching hard around his cock, your hands clutching into the back of his head, your hips moving involuntarily on him.

“I-I l-love you so much Bri, o-oh fuck honey! Y-you’re so good to me!” This orgasm isn’t as intense as the first 2, but to be honest you weren’t sure anything could ever compare to those.

He moans, gasping for air as you flutter around his softening cock, squeezing some of his cum out of you. It drips dirty down his thighs and balls, and he curses.

“F-fuck, babygirl—I love you too, so much— Such a good girl, honey. There you go. It’s alright.” He rubs your stomach gently.

His words and actions are so soft and gentle, causing a small smile to pull at your features.

“Jesus Christ Bri, w-what’s gotten into you honey? That was insane…”

You giggle, turning your head so you can place a sloppy kiss to his stubbly cheek, hand running over the other side of his face. “Amazing and incredible... but insane.”

Brian blushes, leaning down to press a million little kisses over your skin.

“I’m sorry, honey. I... I don’t Know, really. We were just talking and it.... escalated.” He snorts at his own description of what had just happened.

“Are you alright? Let’s get you up and get you clean. I’m sorry I was so rough.”

You chuckle and shake your head, squeezing his thigh.

“I’m fine honey, god, I’m more than fine. I liked it, SO much.” You’re still trying to catch your breath, his hand on your stomach. The touch is making you think about the words you’d exchanged, the implications of what you’d just done.. the evidence of which was running out of your cunt.

“Bri... I meant what I said earlier..about you…” You clear your throat, a little embarrassed. “About you fucking a baby in me...”

 His breath catches, fingers splaying out over your stomach. His heart sinks a little, and he rests his chin on your shoulder.

“I... I wish I could give that to you.” He’s quiet, voice a little sad.

“I just don’t know that’s possible for me, anyone.” He hides his face into your neck, trying to apologize.

Your own heart sinks a little as well, not at the implications of his words, but at the fact that he felt so guilty about it, the fact that he might not be able to give you a baby.

“Hey, Bri, honey…” You turn around in the chair, his soft cock falling free, a combination of your cum flowing freely from your cunt now. Brushing your hand over his face, you trace your thumb under his eye where a single tear has fallen. “It’s okay.. I-I don’t need anything else but you… if a baby happens, that’s great, but if not, I’m perfectly content with just having and loving you.”

 He sniffles, nodding quickly, embarrassed that he was crying. He hugs you tight, arching up to press a gentle kiss to your lips.

“ know... I know, I just... I wish...” He swallows hard.

“I wish we could. I wish I were younger.” He murmurs. It’s all dreams and nonsense, he knows, but it doesn’t stop him from wishing.

You give him a gentle smile, leaning in to kiss him. “I don’t…” He gives me a look, eyebrows raised in disbelief. You laugh, kissing him a few hundred times.

“I’m serious Brian, we met right when we needed to.. if you’d met me 20 or so years ago we never would’ve worked, mainly because I was a baby...” You try to be funny, giggling at your own joke.

“And that would’ve been a little bit more intense in the media than us today, if you can believe that.”

He scoffs, rolling his eyes. “You know that’s not what I meant.” He pokes your side, shaking his head. He sighs, looking up at you.

“Maybe we wouldn’t have worked out. But maybe we would have. Maybe we would’ve been good. Maybe you would’ve... kept me good.” His eyes are a little watery, his insecurities showing through.

“Oh honey.” You wrap your arms around his head, pulling him close, allowing his head to rest on your neck.

“You are good Bri, yeah you’ve made some mistakes in your past, and you’ve done something’s that were less than okay…” He sniffles, making your arms tighten.

“But they made you who you are today, they made you the Brian that I love more than anyone else in the world.. without the mistakes you made, you wouldn’t have learned from them, and you probably wouldn’t be able to cherish and love me the way you do...”

He nods, listening to you for once, just holding you tightly. He was always... overly conscious of his mistakes. His past self and past behavior. He missed being younger, especially with you. He wanted to do so much more than he could with his old body. But then again, he’s sure his younger self would have done something unforgivable. He was stupid. He still was; last night had proved that, but he thought it was a little better.

“I love you…”

You pull him back enough to place a kiss to his forehead, threading your fingers through his hair.

“I love you too silly, so much.” His hands are running up and down your sides, his lips pressing into your neck. You felt so loved and safe, almost like everything that happened last night was just a dream, a bad dream, but only a dream. With Brian, you felt like a better person, which you guess was the best thing to say, because when you’re with someone you love, you’re supposed to feel like a better person… He brought out the best side of you possible, and you were beyond lucky and blessed to have him in your life, holding you in the kitchen of your London flat, the breakfast he’d made you turning cold. Breakfast that he’d fucked you  within an inch of your life next to.

“I just can’t believe you made me squirt in the kitchen Brian.. sounds like a song from fucking Aerosmith…” You chuckle brightly, kissing his nose.

Brian laughs loudly, his head thrown back against the chair.

“If Freddie’d had his way, it could’ve sounded like one of our songs. But even Roger veto’d some of the dirtier ones.” He sighs, stretching his legs a little.

“I’m actually quite proud of myself for the mess. But I’ll clean it up. Do you want to get into a bath?” He squeezes your hips, smiling up at you.

You moan at the thought of a bath, the wetness between your thighs starting to get a little nasty. “You should be very proud of yourself, maybe you can make me do that once a week from now on.”

You wriggle your eyebrows, smirking when he blushes before leaning forward and giving him a quick kiss, getting up off of his lap with shaky legs, you actually greatly resemble a baby deer.

“A bath sounds great by the way, I feel like a French whore at the moment, so some lavender bath salts would really do the trick.”

He can’t help but laugh at your unsteady gait, but quickly masks his smile when you give him a glare. He stands, walking over to put an arm around your waist and lead you up the stairs.

“Well, I’ll make you a lovely lavender bath, and while you’re doing that, I’ll clean everything up downstairs. Maybe I’ll make us some tea, too. How’s that sound?”

 You give him a pleasure filled smile, cupping his face before placing a sound kiss to his lips.

“It sounds like you’re making me the most spoiled and loved woman in the whole of London.” You giggle when he starts kissing your neck, your arms wrapping tightly around his neck as he dips you. “Brian! Your scruff is gonna give me beard burn.” You’re laughing hard, my heart lighter than its felt in years.

“Love, I hate to break the news to you, but I think you probably already have beard burn—everywhere.” He chuckles, kissing you once more before heading for the bathtub, busying himself with making you the nicest bath in the entire world. He had a plethora of different bath salts and bath bombs, etc, and he wanted to make everything perfect for you.

You sit on the counter, on a towel of course, watching Brian get the tub ready, feeling beyond happy and at ease. After a while he claps his hands together and helps me down, helping me into the tub.

“Godddddd, you always get these so perfect honey…” You sink into the water, allowing the smells of lavender and oranges to sooth you, the warmth of the water making your sore legs and pussy relax and feel 100x better.

“Please hurry your cleaning so you can come keep me company...” You pout at him, your eyes big and innocent. He laughs, and leans forward to give you a quick kiss, his hand threading through your hair. “I’ll try my best.”

He moves to clean himself up as well, watching you in the mirror, smiling widely when he sees your head drooping to the side. Shaking his head, he bends down beside you, bathing you while you sleep, your mouth open just a tad. Once he’s bathed you, he brushes a strand of hair from your forehead and grabs a bath pillow from the cabinet, for once incredibly excited that you had such an obsession with bath gadgets. Propping your head up, and once he’s satisfied that you wouldn’t drown, he stands, wincing a bit at the pain in his knees, before heading to the door. Brian spares you another look, smiling fondly… Sure, things were tough, it wasn’t going to be an easy go of things… but he didn’t care. Last night, the earth shattering pain he’d felt when you ran out, it only confirmed to him that he couldn’t live without you, and he knew you wouldn’t let him.

tags: @meddows-taylors @toomuchlove-willkillyou @brianmayoucease @leah-halliwell92 @rogertaylors-lipgloss @mariekuuuuuh @unofficialbillnye @stephydearestxo @goodoldfashioned-rogerboy @danamaleksworld @dereones98 @glasgowkisschelseasmile @awkwardangelshezza @bellamy1998 @psychosupernatural @warren-lauren @womanwithahotdogstand @oujiacallme @harrisunn @anotheronebitesthedeaks @stormtrprinstilettos @get-on-your-bikes-and-ride @amor-libre @marymaia00 @ellywritesfics @simonedk @queen-see-ya-in-valhalla @sam-mercury-sixx @horrorsinwonderland @toomuchtellyneck @asgardianvamp21 @crazylittlethingcalledobsession @marvelstuck @softboydeacon @a-queen-on-her-throne @roger-bang-the-drum @frannyxc @mrsmazzellotaylor @reedusteinrambles @drowseoftaylor @doubledeaky @indieblair @freddiedearfriend @subbysharkbabe

[marvel-lucy]

The Safe Place - chapter 2

(Imagine being able to write a fic where things actually happened. I can’t. Instead here’s 1400 words of people walking downstairs in a house... Enjoy!)

Chapter 1 on my Masterlist

It’s disconcerting, just how quiet he is. You try not to imagine the next few weeks, if he stays this silent, insular figure, lurking on the periphery of every room you’re in, every move you make. You take him to his bedroom, and he stands in the doorway, watching as you gesture slightly pointlessly at the bathroom, the cupboard where he can find fresh towels.

Stepping back out into the corridor, you feel him recoil as you brush past him in the doorway. There’s pain there, distrust, anxiety. This isn’t someone who can be easily fixed by two weeks on a farm, but it’s all you can offer, and you have your own fears and nightmares to live with.  He reaches through the doorway, heavy bag swinging, and lets it fall to the floor with a dull thud. It’s almost the first sound he’s made, as if he’s barely interacting with the house.

‘I’m just down the hall there,’ you gesture to a closed door a little way away, ‘but obviously the whole house is yours to use. Help yourself to food, books, TV, make yourself at home.  I’ll show you around the land this afternoon if you like?’

Questions seem a good idea. Something that forced him to interact, rather than just listening passively. He nods, and meets your eye briefly, before looking away again.  There’s a chill in your veins when he looks at you, and although you know Steve would never put you in harm’s way, your knowledge of the Winter Soldier flares in your mind. You knew more about him than you should, had followed the case as Steve had battled the UN to treat him as a victim, and not a war criminal, knew he’d been living in Wakanda for years. Now he could finally return home, if there was any semblance of home left for him – or any semblance of him left. Exonerated of all charges, but bearing the weight of his actions, you had the sense he’d rather have faced the full force of the law than be free. You’d read his files too – some while Steve was looking for him, and you were still part of the team and some you’d accessed illicitly from the farm since you left. They’d never removed your security access, so you could read whatever you wanted – you were sure it was Stark’s way of offering you a way back in, if and when you wanted it, a temptation perhaps – but mostly you didn’t want to know. Reading about Hydra only brought it all back. The musty smell of damp, unused basement rooms; the yellowing light from fading lightbulbs and grimy windows; the feel of wires digging into your wrists and ankles, cutting into your skin as you moved; the shock of a fist meeting your face, and the crack of bones. This was reality for the team, you’d always known it, but now it was part of your reality too.

He followed you back downstairs, to where Steve was putting the last of the shopping away in the kitchen.

‘I’m going to have to go,’ he said, truck keys already in his hand as he spoke. He bounced slightly on his feet with impatience and eagerness to be off, then in a swift movement, pulled Bucky in to his arms and hugged him. Bucky was slower to respond, but did, gripping on to the back of Steve’s shirt tightly, eyes buried in his shoulder.

‘Call me, Buck, any time. I’ll get things straight in New York, but enjoy the peace and quiet here, OK?’ He ducked his head, forcing Bucky to meet his eyes.  ‘And don’t do anything stupid…’

‘I know, until you get back.’ It was a relief to see a smile break out on Bucky’s face, proof that there was humanity there still.  He shoved Steve lightly, then followed him out onto the porch, with you close behind. Outside, Bucky sat on a bench by the door, letting the dog come and rest his head on his knee, rhythmically stroking his ears.  You followed Steve down to the truck, wanting a moment to speak to him alone.

‘Do you need to go straight away? You can’t stay for lunch, help him settle in? Help make it less awkward?’ You smiled as you said this, but you were too used to being alone after all this time, and the thought of a stranger in your home was making your heart beat a little too fast. At least if Steve was there, there would be familiar conversations to ease things.  You knew your face was showing too much, that you were one step from begging, but you couldn’t help it. Steve’s face twisted with guilt as he looked at you.

‘I can’t, I’m sorry. But I’ll come back as soon as I can.  Since he landed back here, it’s been a free-for-all. Press conferences, demonstrations, interviews – sometimes I can’t even tell if they’re for or against him being back here – but I’ve gotta handle it, try and put a lid on all the crazy, so that he can get on with life. But for now, he just needs to be away from it all. He’s been living on a farm in Wakanda, so pitching him into New York with the mob was not going to help him any.’

‘And he needs help? I mean, of course he does, but specifically? I thought he was doing better, he was on his own in Romania, then in Wakanda, he’s fixed right?’

‘Yeah, technically, he’s fixed. There’s no Winter Soldier in there any more. But is he OK? Not so much. He was doing OK in Romania, sure, if you count living in fear, in a one-room, ready to run at all times as OK. But he was fine, you know, eating, taking care of himself, keeping track of memories… probably would have been good, if he’d got to stay there. But since Zemo re-awakened the Soldier, he’s lost all confidence in himself. Even though Shuri says there’s no trace of the programming, it’s like he’s afraid to start again, because it could all be taken away again.’

He paused for a moment, and his eyes flicked up to the house, to where Bucky was sitting.

‘Look, it’s obvious he’s got PTSD – that’s what Sam says it is anyway, it was shellshock back when I heard of it.  No surprise, I looked it up and let’s be honest, we all do.  I’m guessing you won’t tell me how you’re doing, but you know what I mean.’ He would have looked relaxed to an outside observer, gazing off into a blue cloudless sky, leaning against his truck, but she was closer, could see the muscles in his jaw clenching, pockets stretching against hands that were balled into tight fists. He looked back at her.  ‘He’s got 70 years of torture to process and it’s… not going great.   Don’t worry; he’s no danger to you, but to himself?’  He looked up at the house again.  ‘Flashbacks, nightmares, forgetting to eat, to shower, anxiety, trust issues, nausea… you name it, he’s got it.’

He must have seen your frown out of the corner of his eye.

‘I know, I’m putting a lot on you, I wouldn’t if I wasn’t desperate.  I don’t want him out in Wakanda again, I’ve just got him back Stateside and I just can’t have him that far again, but he needs not to be where everyone’s shouting his name, arguing, there’s no chance to recover there. And he needs to be around people, not goats. And you’re good people.’  He gave her one of his smiles, but the edges were too sharp for her to be charmed.

‘I’m not turning him away. I just want to know what I’m dealing with.  I’m no therapist Steve; I can’t even cure myself, so god knows what I can do for him. But I’ll make sure he eats, get him out in the air, keep him away from the news. I’ll do what I can. Just don’t leave us alone too long. It might not be that great for either of us.’

Steve nodded, and you leaned in to hug him goodbye.  His heart sounded steadily where your ear rested on his chest and you let yourself be enveloped by his arms, allowing yourself a moment of closeness with someone else. That much, but no more. You’d learnt a lesson about trust the hard way.

-----

@melconnor2007 @avengerscompound @kittyslove @badassbaker @phoenix21love @lbouvet  @bellenuit45 @prplprincez  @gingerrootknits @pineapplebooboo @feelmyroarrrr @avengerofyourheart @eyeofdionysus@hellomissmabel @learisa @mitra-k-w @imhereforbvcky @shaddixlife @supernatural-girl97 @iwillbeinmynest @amrita31199 @algud @whatsbetterthanfantasy @pixierox101 @madcheshire89  @chipilerendi  @mckorni32843 @amandarosemire @nyxveracity @sea040561 @mrsalh32611 @ruinerofcheese @callmebucky-doll @vintagepigeon  @sassycanoodler  @natcad @thisismysecrethappyplace @geeksareunique @mywinterwolf  @moderapoppins @rinthehufflepuff @holyfuckloueh @onebatch--twobatch @jaqui-has-a-conspiracy-theory@patzammit @procrastinatingart1st @princess76179 @marvelouspottering @fangirlanotherjust  @notyourtypicalrose @princess-rene@miraclesoflove @scarletluvscas @inlovewithjamesbarnes @mizzzpink

[xcookyluvrx-blog]

::x.Storytime.x::

💜 Damaged 💜

🔹 It my first fic, and this is my baby. not fully sure if i am actually going to reveal it entirely to the world. 

BUT if i shall choose to reveal it...

🔹Reviews and comments are always welcomed

(((❌Trigger Warnings❌)))

🔸Child Abuse

🔸Domestic and Physical Abuse

🔸Emotional and Mental Abuse

🔸Mentions of Child Addiction

🔸Mentions of Pedophilia

🔸Mentions of Rape

🔸Strong Violence

🔸 Strong Language

❌Continue at your own risk❌

❌May add more warnings as they appear❌ 

🔹 Without further adieu shall we begin ?

💫💫💫💫💫💫💫💫💫💫💫

Precious moments began to flood his memory. Random emotions and scents pure as day filled his senses. The subtle feeling of the purple and white petals beneath his fingers. The refreshing calm stream of water flowing from the waterfall just a few meters away. He loved the way the warm sun gently kissed his beautiful caramel skin. The light breeze pushed through his wavy, raven colored mullet styled hair as he sat upon his favorite rock. Pure bliss and happiness is the only thing that occupies his being in this very moment. 

The calming scent of the blooming flowers signaling the change of the cold months to Spring sent him to a state of Euphoria. For which he no longer had to stay confined to the safety of his little apartment in the Big City. He was able to come to his favorite place. A place so far off the beaten path, he assumed nobody knew of the area due to lack of foot traffic in the dirt or unbroken branches all around. With this information, he was allowed to spread his wings and be himself.

This was the one place outside that he was able to spread his beautiful wings after a harsh winter. The way they fluttered when the cool fresh subtle mist from the waterfall gently dusted them, sending chills down his spine. The first flight of Spring is always soothing and a necessity. This part of the forest was perfect for his flights of fresh air. The sky was perfect right before Dawn. As the sun kissed the sky good morning and the moon good night, it created a beautiful painting of vibrant colors of pink and a tinge of purple as the moon faded away, allowing him to become lost in a daze.

The heavy tree coverage above made it so he can fly above the tree tops but still stay low enough if needed to make emergency landings. The constant caves within the high rock formations were a plus as well.

{{{ End of Flashback }}}

He was snapped back to reality the moment he felt a shift in the air. He didn't have to open his eyes to know who it was. This person was shy yet interesting. He yearned to know this person. The person who chose to defy their own self conscious of listening to their Boss' orders to not harm or play with the Princess. 

"Y'know, you think by walking lightly everytime you enter that dingey hallway is truly going to scare me or something?" he says annoyance obvious in his tone.

The person doesn't respond but instead can only allow a sly smirk dance across their lips as their eyes drop instantly to the floor. 

In this moment, he opens his eyes and glances towards the door with the tiny one way window.

"Are we still pretending to be loyal and NOT dare enter Boss' playroom?" he waits for a response.

"What's wrong? Worried I'm going to tell BossMan that you're not as obedient as he thinks? That one of his high ups is willing to risk his position, his very life, just to be in that old dingy hallway, hm?"

They can't help but find his antics amusing to say the least. He is bold and he is nothing compared to how he acted when he first was brought to the mansion. So because he obviously wanted to play games, they thought to themself, why not play along. After all, it is HIS house and HE is the one who kept him.

⏮️⏮️ Rewind 2 Months ⏮️⏮️

"Lunatika finally has the Kingdom to herself lately?" Yoongi sarcastically says, causing her to return to reality and finally blink. The City skyline now in her view.

"Shut the fuck up Yoongi. Why are you always putting your nose where it doesn't belong?" Anger evident in her tone accompanied with a stare that sent chills as she turned to walk away from the window.

"Listen Amaris, you may be Boss for now, but remember your place." he says calmly.

A death ridden stare is what she delivered him, accompanied with a slight head tilt.

"Yoongi, Yoongi... I know my place very well. Question is, do you?" emotionless eyes now centered at his. 

"As far as I remember, you been with Bossman years before I was brought in." She continues as she strides towards him. 

"Yet you are still only a General? where as I hold his second in command." she spits bitterly at him. 

"Watch yourself! I may not hold the title officially, but im still the one who he turns to." 

"Officially, you're just his street rat w-" 

*SLAP*

She was cut off by the back of his hand making contact with her cheek. Shock spread across her face. 

"You may hold Underboss, but remember im your older brother Amaris! Know your place!" he says as he turns to walk away.

Siblings but with two different personalities. Childhood for them was non existent. they had no social skills besides each other and even then, their interaction was bare minimum. But do NOT doubt their bond that held them together. Father would violently punish them daily and Mother was no better. father would beat them for the simplest of things. mother would starve them if their chores weren't up to her standards. she would burn them with a heated spoon if they looked at her. the small cigarette burns were littered across their arms and hands. 

Mother was a drunk who had a thirst for torture. the thought of feeling another life slip from her bare hands was just like her wondering what she would have to eat. Yoongi was kept locked in a cage in the darkest part of the basement, often times starved and ignored. late nights Amaris would sneak into the basement and give Yoongi some food she managed to sneak away during the supper she was allowed to have. She would stay with him and comfort him th best she could through the cage. Fingers locking with his through the openings. they knew the danger of getting caught but she would risk it all, knowing she did her best to help him. it weighed on both their minds when father would often take her on business trips with him. to their mother, they were fun, bonding moments between father and daughter. reality was, she would be savagely taken by her fathers business associates who would be willing to pay a pretty penny. he would occasionally question why his associates are always willing to pay more for longer time. eventually, curiosity got the best of him and he self indulged. that was her breaking point. when she came back after that she vowed to stop it all once and for all.

Amaris had enough with her life. she tried freeing herself many times. each time failing worse than the last. Until one day...

{{{ END OF UPDATE }}}

[mortaljin]

Two Shadows of a Broken Promise | Chapter One

Word Count: 3.9k Warnings: Mentions of violence, weapons, death, drugs, and other gang related things || Warnings will be added as necessary. Genre: Angst and Romance. Potential for future smut || Mafia!Au | Friends-to-Lovers!Au | Enemies-to-Lovers!Au Pairing: Kim Taehyung x Fem!Reader || Side pairings will be added as necessary.

Summary: The crevices that shadows cling to between—and in the corners of—buildings are not something that you fear. Neither you nor Kim Taehyung had any fear of the dangers lurking in the night. Still, you promised to walk away. But five years is a long time to remain aware of a broken promise to a man who could very well be in the shadows himself. 

Masterlist | Prologue | One |

© VISUAL SHOCK

Your POV

Even though the deep, burgundy curtains—that covered every window—made the room look like it was no later than dawn, the light shining around the edges proved otherwise.

Polished, manicured nails drilled into the keyboard of a laptop that was barely illuminated; the soft sound of a whirl coming from the underside of the device said that it was time to give it a good dusting.

note to self, you typed on the laptop’s note function, give hoseok laptop for checks and repairs

The obnoxious yellow color of the “sticky notes” application made your heavy head feel even worse. You scoffed, glancing at the clock to find there was over an hour before it was acceptable to take another round of painkillers. So, instead, you changed the note color to a softer purple and reopened the document that you were working on—before your mind took another detour.

Displayed on the screen in front of you was a list of schedules. It contained all the times, locations, and persons of every transactions that were set to occur in the next seventy-two hours. It contained your schedule along with the schedules of all those in the near vicinity.

The Jades were new: a small group of novices that only knew how to use their mouths, not their fists. This group only dabbles in dealing—usually drugs, rarely weapons.

The Umbra were fucking annoying, to say the least. You seethed momentarily as you highlighted their slots on the list. Crooks. All of them, you thought.

None of the other names on the list gave much need for concern. The Marks, even the slimy Fangs, were all to be easily consolidated in the next 72 hours. None required much man power to takeout.

The tasks at hand seemed easy, save for the a little question mark with only one slot filled in.

A soft, aggravated sigh left your mouth when you realized you were required to interact with other people today. No amount of hiding in your office would prevent your duties from being fulfilled. Your chair swiveled to the side as you reached over to press a button under your desk. It took a moment of struggling to find it but once you found that button, and a lovely voice filled your ears, you felt the slightest rush of relief come over you.

Slightest.

“I need you in my office in ten minutes. Please bring ramen.”

The chuckle, and what was no doubt a potentially sarcastic remark, on the other line was cut off by white noise as your finger left the button. You laid your head against your desk and closed your eyes for a few seconds…

*BZZZ*

With eyes shooting open at the sound of the office door unlocking, your hand flew to the handgun under your desk. Rapid reflexes had the gun aimed at the person walking through the threshold before the door fully opened.

“Top Ramen, seriousl—fuck!” The black-haired man’s chiding was cut off by the near heart attack he received from your paranoia.

You lowered your gun and switched the safety back on, “what the fuck, Jin?”

He lowered his hand from his chest and straightened himself up. “I could ask you the same thing, you demon.”

Jin placed a steaming cup of microwaved ramen in front of you, forcing you to cringe when you remembered the task you set out for him.

“I forgot I asked you to come up,” you murmured under your breath.

“That was ten minutes ago,” he said, point blank.

“I fell asleep, okay? I’m just—” There was a little bit of poison in your rhetorical question and although Jin didn’t even flinch, the guilt hit you nonetheless.

Sighing, you beckoned him over to you. It took him little to no effort to pull you from the chair enough to slide under you and bring you into his lap. You couldn’t avoid the breathing in the scent of his aftershave and cologne.

“Talk to me, baby girl. What’s going on?”

The corners of your lips perked upwards, and you sighed into his shoulder for a moment.

“Can’t sleep,” you mumbled into the soft fabric of his shirt. “I don’t know why, but I can’t sleep lately,” you said as you lifted your head.

“You haven’t held any meetings lately,” Jin inquired, “do you want me to get the resident doctor?”

You shook your head in reply, and managed to turn the desk chair back towards the computer. “No, it’s okay.”

You stood up and straightened yourself up to let Jin know that the snuggling was over. When you could practically feel him rolling his eyes behind you, you tapped your nails along your desk to get his attention.

“There are a few things on the agenda in the next 72 hours that I want to address, Seokjin.”

He hummed in response.

He leaned in closer to you, and it was hard to concentrate with his warm breath sending shivers down your spine.

“Firstly, the Umbra are a big fucking problem. Their boss was caught in the middle of some sex and abuse scandals.”

“Right. Them and that politician—oh what’s his name?” Jin paused for moment, trying to remember the biggest news in the city right now. “Whatever. They were involved with some trafficking chains.”

You nodded, eyes darting back to the list. “I want you to send people to figure out which members were involved and also, wipe them the fuck out. Get that slimy politician too, if you can.

“Besides them, no one else is a problem right now. If we can get the Jades under our control, we may benefit; they’re good at negotiating for a group that only deals drugs.”

“Do you want me to—”

A task dawned on you, causing you to interrupt Jin. “Wait. Put that at the bottom of the list of to-dos. They’re not a threat right now.”

“Right.”

“I want these guys,” you jabbed a solitary finger against the line that held the Fangs, “to be consolidated. A few of them are trying to branch out and make their own deals, but under our name. They either lump themselves back together, or break off from me. And if they do the latter—”  

“We take them out.”

You smiled, proud that he follows directions so well—even when unspoken.

“As far as the Marks go, I just want them gone. They’re annoying and too stupid to stay out of trouble, I want them gone from the Golden Rose name. Let them know soon that we will not be offering extended services any longer.”

“Will they still receive the protection of the Golden Rose on Four Seasons grounds?”

You thought for a second on the circumstances. If you excommunicate the Marks from your business, then they will likely retaliate. But if they retaliate on Four Seasons grounds, the grounds of the city’s peace zones, then they forfeit as much as their life.

“Why not. If they fuck up its on them.”

He hummed in obedience, “is there anything else I can do for you, your highness?”

“Don’t mock me, Kim Seokjin.”

“Ah,” he cried as he feigned a blow to his heart, “you wound me with your lack of faith in me. I was merely using the correct honorifics.”

Holding back a giggle, you gave him the most serious glare you could give. But failed. “You’re the worst second in command the mafia has ever seen.”

You expected another dramatic act of betrayal, but your laughter died down as he moved from your side to spin your chair facing him. The sound coming from the palms of his hands landing roughly against the edge of your desk found their way into your ears.

His gaze ran up your neck, slowly, taking in every inch of you from the top of your breasts to your lips.

“You weren’t calling me the worst last night when we were tangled in your sheets.” The warmth of his breath near your ear travelled to your core, and you almost buckled under his dominance.

“Ah-ahh,” you moaned as he nipped at your earlobe. His lips traveled along your cheek until they captured yours in a heated kiss.

You entertained him for a moment before pulling away.

“We have w-work to do, Jin.”

He whined but pulled away, leaving you flustered and almost out of breath.

“You’re no fun when you act like a boss.”

“Jin, I am the boss. May I remind you that this is my empire?”

He rolled his eyes, and waved you off, “yeah, yeah. I’ll call the teams together and tell them what we’re doing in the next few days. Will I see you this evening?”

You opened your mouth to speak when a ping came from your computer. Swirling around, you read a notification that had a long time coming.

Event coming up in one week: Meet with Kim Taehyung.

You choked down a grimace and moved your eyes to the left to read over your list one last time.

“I’ll let you know, Jin.”

He stood there for a moment, waiting to see if there was anything else for you to say.

“Also, I need some intel sent to the north side of the city. I’m sure you’ve heard the rumors of that new mastermind running around up there.”

Jin left the office tight lipped and obedient.

Your ramen had chilled, almost too much to be good anymore. But, you were hungry and you scarfed it down nonetheless. Between bites, you continued thinking about meeting with Taehyung. Many months had gone by without so much as a thought about the lanky teenager that was too good for the world, and even more months had passed since you last saw him.

It had been a year after graduating high school that you told Kim Taehyung you were going to college. In all reality you were on your way to building a mafia empire. Still, when it became harder and harder to see your friend, the excuse was at least believable.

What a joke, Y/N.

You couldn’t keep your promise to walk away from this life, but you could keep your promise to meet up with him at your old spot.

Sighing, you penned in an unmovable opening in your schedule for a week from today.

Taehyung’s POV

The air seemed to grow cold as Taehyung walked down the metal steps leading towards the bottom of the warehouse. An echo bounced off the walls with each click of the black, polished heels as he reached the next step. He placed both hands on the railing and leaned forward as he stopped on the landing; a handful of rings made his presence known as they collided with the bars.

There was a brief lapse in the hum of chatter below when the multitude of people looked up to him. He scanned his eyes across the floor of the warehouse, observing his men as they unpackaged, checked, tested, and repackaged.

This warehouse contained his pride and joy—prides and joys. ­In this hidden building, all of his creations could come to life. For four years he was hidden away in different hotel rooms—tinkering, toying, testing—under the allowance of an old colleague. For four years he learned, he dealed, and he stepped up.

Until finally, for the past year he has begun to make a name for himself. Drugs were dealt, and guns were created and sold to all parts of the country. Sure, there were probably more ethical means to achieving his goal, but the shadows were the life he knew best.

His prideful smirk fell from his face as he decided to make the rounds and inspect this batch of minion’s handiwork.

As he turned to continue down the stairs to the floor of the warehouse, Kim Taehyung’s phone pinged with the sound of a notification. The phone’s bright, white screen illuminated his worn face against the dimmer, yellow light of the warehouse. It caused him to shut his eyes and recoil a little before he had the opportunity to turn the brightness down.

The experience made him look around at his surroundings and make a mental note:

Maybe we can afford to keep this place a little brighter.

Looking at his phone again, he saw a reminder in his calendar waiting for confirmation.

Meet with Y/N L/N in: One week.

The reminder made him smile, and almost prompted him to reminisce. But, he knew that he had much to do today. He pressed the ‘remind me later’ button and shoved the phone back in his pocket.

He glanced up in time to see his warehouse supervisor, and second-in-command, rushing up the stairs to meet him.

“Ah, good evening sir,” the man huffed, face full of concern.

Taehyung patted him on the shoulder and guided him back down the stairs. “It’s good to see you, I haven’t been down here in a while, have I?” He gestured with his hand to the different lines, “lets walk while we talk, I want to inspect the progress. After you, Jimin.”

The men made their way down the stairs and started for the far end of the warehouse towards a production line. This warehouse is barren of machinery, and instead is made of a large multitude of workers with nothing but their tools and their tables.

“The men have successfully finished creating the first batch of those hybrid guns you blueprinted for us. Many were surprised at how easily it was to make, yet how powerful your idea came to be.”

Taehyung only smirked at Jimin’s compliment, “who would have known those two years in engineering would have rendered me capable of weapon building.”

They continued down the line of tables, overhearing many men bantering and laughing as they assembled the different pieces. Taehyung smiled to himself to know that the people under him aren’t as miserable as he used to be.

When the pair reached the last table of assembly, Taehyung noticed a lone man and an overflow of pieces spread around him. With a closer glance, it dawned on him that it was the newest recruit, a kid barely out of high school. Jimin gave a low scoff, before leaving his bosses side to promptly scold the man.

“Of all the days for you to fucking fall behind, you had to pull this shit the day that the boss arrived? You little—”

Taehyung had heard enough, and stepped between Jimin and the amateur. “Jimin, that’s quite enough.”

“Sorry boss, but I don’t think this kid is worth a damn. He needs to be taught a lesson for not rising up to the standards.”

Kim Taehyung does not like to have to repeat himself, and Jimin’s rebuttal of his boss’s intervention hit a nerve somewhere. It was not hard to tower over a man like Jimin, whose small stature made him a great reconnaissance leader, and neither was it hard to impose authority over him.

“Need I remind you, Park, that I was once a kid too. And now I am your boss. Think of that the next time you want to bully a kid for falling behind. He could one day be the boss of his own mafia, one that could crush you. Get out of here and send Jungkook my way.”

Jimin was clearly not pleased to be sent away in front of not only a young member, but a new one as well. Out of fear of bigger repercussions, Jimin turned on his heal and walked up the stairs towards Jungkook surveillance cave.

“I’m sorry for his harsh words.” Taheyung spoke directly to the young man was Jimin had walked out of sight. “I don’t know what came over him.”

“N-no, I’m the one who should be sorry, s-sir.”

Taehyung hummed, choosing to ignore the young man’s tremble as a result of his proximity. Instead, he observed the table’s appalling mess. There was only one gun assembled, and poorly done at that.

“Can I ask why you are the only person left? With your entire days’ worth of work left on the table?”

He gulped, glancing an eye at his progress, or lack thereof. “I’ve never seen a gun before, sir. And I… no one else bothered to help me and I had a hard time of reading the blueprints and I—”

The boy’s rambling was cut off by his boss’s stern hand being raised to prompt his silence.

“Why are you here? Forgive me for not remembering, but why did seek us out?”

His shoulders slumped forward a little, and he hung his head. Shaking it a little, he murmured his sentence but only a few words could be made out: “mom,” and “sick,” and “money.”

Taehyung nodded, but didn’t let the hurt in his heart at the boy’s words make him soften. He simply picked up the blueprint off the table, and the poorly assembled model, and brought to the empty table behind him.

“One of the first things about assembling based on a blueprint is knowing what the blueprint means,” he began to explain to the boy.

Once he did this, he took the gun apart and laid the pieces out. Taehyung told the boy to get all the pieces for another, and those too were brought to the table. Taking the twenty minutes out of his evening to teach the kid how to build the gun was nothing if it meant he could make the profit off it.

That’s what he told himself, anyway: that he was teaching the kid to make the profit off the cheap labor, not because he didn’t want the kid to get in with the actual wrong crowd.

He watched the kid dissemble and reassemble the gun multiple times before he approved.

“Do what you can for the next hour and a half, and then get outta here. I’ll have someone finish the rest.”

The kid stammered out a ‘thank you’ and all but somersaulted back in place.

Taehyung made the assumption that the rest of the workers would be fine, Jimin can supervise otherwise. So, instead of finishing his rounds, he too made his way to Jungkook’s cave.

His phone dinged again, this time because of a message from Jungkook himself:

Boss, you might want to come here for a second.

Once he was right outside the door, he received a second:

Not an emergency, but probably important.

Taehyung knocked briefly before making his way into the room. Monitors on every wall, and wires lining the floor, welcomed him into Jungkook’s area. It was clean, it was organized, but quite frankly Taehyung knew nothing about what went on.

He was a businessman and Jungkook was the security guard—that has way more training in killing people than expected. But he did his job, cleaned up when necessary, and kept to himself. Taehyung knew little about Jungkook, only enough to trust him and to have his loyalty.

“Hey boss, I need you to come look at this. A camera picked up some guy snooping around the entrance.”

“Of course, there was someone around the entrance,” Taehyung replied with a sigh, “the warehouse front is a convenience store for crying out loud.”

Jungkook just shook his head and pressed some buttons; the video zoomed in a bit.

“No, this guy looked right into the camera—see here!—no one should know it’s there. What if its—”

“Kook,” Taehyung warned, “Are you sure you’re not being paranoid?”

He sighed, relenting. “Perhaps, but I’m going to look into the matter regardless. Rumor has it that the Golden Rose have caught wind of your little business.”

The last thing Taehyung needed was an invitation to the Golden Rose.

The only thing that Taehyung could do in response is pinch the bridge of his nose. He let go after a brief moment to rewatch the surveillance cameras. The man in the video looked nothing more than a tourist, with the gaudy shirt and hat. But his face looked worn, too worn for a man that young. The look in his eyes when the man looked into the camera hit Taehyung somewhere, and the tourist get-up only grew more suspicious.

“Go ahead and keep an eye out for ‘em. It’s not uncommon for people to send their recons out in streetwear.”

Jungkook nodded at the order, pressing a few more buttons in response to it. “If someone seems suspicious, I’ll have someone tail them until they get where they’re going. They’ll keep quiet if they found anything about us.”

“No blood, not yet. Find another way; either scare them or bribe them. But I don’t want to be a part of another war.”

“Roger that.”

As Taehyung walked away, his head was swimming with convoluted thoughts. Something about his evening felt terribly off after speaking with Jungkook, and he couldn’t get the man on the surveillance out of his head.

I don’t have time to deal with this, this week. He groaned at the thought of cleaning up his trail in a week; cleaning up his trail before it was time to see you.

“If only she knew,” he whispered under his breath as he took the stairs to the left to lead him to the car that was waiting for him. Taehyung scoffed at himself and decided to start planning how to hide all this from you.

Once he left the warehouse—which had only seemed to grow dimmer, dustier, and duller. There wasn’t much for him to do for the rest of the evening, so he decided to make a phone call.

He listened to the phone ring—once, twice—as he climbed into the sleek black car. Immediately the divider between the front and the back went up, and he had the privacy of silence to himself.

“Hello? Yes, Miss Moon, there is a list of things for you to take care of. Yes, go ahead—” He paused for her to reach a writing tool, given that it was after her office hours. The shuffling of what was likely her purse could be heard in the background. “Okay? Firstly, I need you to block off the entire day exactly a week from now. What do you mean I have a meeting that morning?”

He sighed, aggravated at the inconvenience. “Fine, but nothing after that meeting is over, got it? Next, I need you to have brighter lights for the warehouse ordered. No, don’t install them just yet. It’s too dim in there, and I don’t think we need the cover of darkness right now.

“Finally, I need you to include an extra payment in this month’s billing statements. Yes, the new kid. Take it out of mine, I can survive without the valet for a month. Oh, and also?”

Taehyung paused; the car rounded a corner towards one of his residences in the city.

“I’m feeling a bit restless, do send someone up to entertain me this evening.”

With that, the line clicked off and his driver stopped at the foot of a sky-high, classy building.

[darkdevasofdestruction]

The Blood Moon

Summary : With great powers comes great responsibility, so why bother with them, when you can just chill back and relax? That’s what Katrina always told herself in a way to calm down whenever she felt herself lose control, but nothing will stop her from getting in trouble with literally everyone around. Her world was chaotic, like the last seconds of a fly trapped in a spider’s web, but what happens when the world literally goes Upside Down for her, has to take care of a group of nerds much bigger than herself and even worst, she feels her heart beat for the first time, but now, not because of anxiety, but due to a much warmer feeling.

Pairing : Billy Hargrove x OC (Katrina Black)

TW : Stranger Things, as a TV show, explores a lot of themes, including childhood trauma of various types, which I am going to go along with.

—

This story contains and explores a variety of trauma and darker themes, most of them relating in canon to a certain character, others that I’m more familiar with then I wish I were and so on.

I have this story written on AO3 that I wrote in like 3-4 days because GODS I am in L O V E with Billy Hargrove and someone please save me, all my feelings are in here, from sorrow to glee, from fluff to angst and so on.

But I’ve never been prouder of a story I’ve written like I am with this one.

—

Chapter 1: The Fox and the Lion

I had no idea how the hell I managed to get wound up in a group of 12 year olds’ troubles, but I can’t deny that it wasn’t fun, if not, just crazy dangerous and deadly. I met up Mike and his little group of nerdy friends whilst going to the arcade one day and them cursing my nickname for not being able to defeat my high-score in any game. Of course, since all arcade games only had a 3 letter maximum for each name, I put mine.

“FOX”

Because I have red hair and can be pretty sly and sneaky, despite how very introverted I am. Now it’s my last year at Hawkins High School, this one being the most important because if everything goes right, I may get a scholarship and be able to continue my studies further, to University, pursuing Vet Medicine, like I’ve always dreamt of.

Now, to tell a little bit about myself…

Officially, I was called “3”, just like the number tattooed on my shoulder, which is to brand me as one of the many experiments the Russians/Americans did on children. Somehow, and very thankfully, I managed to run away, thanks to my weird powers that I’m still not 100% sure, and found myself in the woods, where I stumbled upon this policeman named Hopper who was nice enough to take me in for a while, before getting me to an orphanage and making sure a real family gets to take care of me.

The date of me meeting Jim was January 3rd, a very cold and snowy winter, so from that day on, that has become my birthday. Since I didn’t have a name, he let me stay a few good weeks with him and taught me how to read and write, which was pretty easy, to say the least, and upon reading so many books, I found a name that finally suited my tastes.

“Katrina”

That was 5 years ago, when I was 13, and now I’m at my own little house close to the Byers, I recently found out, living alone with Jim visiting me often, or having the kids have sleepovers at mine from time to time, when I’m not too busy with my studies.

After the incident with the monsters, Will’s disappearance, El and everything, we’ve really bonded, and gotta say, being a Rogue in their DnD party was super fun!

Life hasn’t been easy, that much is sure, isn’t it? Many bad things happened that cannot be changed or unmade, so you have to life with them through the rest of your life.

But things never stay the same, do they…?

Life at highschool ain’t the best, especially not with all these mean girls and boys around, but how I survived 3 years, I can survive one more, right? Also, recently, Will and the gang told us about a new girl coming from California called “Max” who apparently beat all their records as well and from their description, I really wanna meet her. Now, I’m wondering if this is a coincidence or not, but my Sherlockian instincts were tingling, and she may or may not be our new colleague’s little sister. Oh, yes, new colleague… His name is Billy Hargrove and he’s the most intimidating man I’ve ever seen in my life. He is literally radiating masculinity and his eyes make everyone either kneel at his feet or stay away from him, because he won’t take anyone’s shit. In a very short amount of time, he managed to gain the reputation of “Keg King”…I think that was? Beating Steve Harrington at popularity, now being the literal best student at sports (especially basketball), having the most number of uh…Charmed ladies, as a count, and beat up a ton of boys who dared disrespect him. So, uh...FUN!

I could have said that I’ve been pretty lucky so far, seeing that I didn’t have the need to directly interact with Billy so far, but fate was never as you’d expect and the weirdest of changes always happen when you least expect them.

Wednesday morning -

I wake up, eat a bowl of milk and cereal, go to wash my fave, brush my long red hair and look through my clothes.

I choose an over-sized AC/DC Tshirt, light blue boyfriend jeans, a red plaid shirt tied to my waist, round shades, a black hat and black combat boots, take my bag and go to my motorbike that I recently managed to buy and went to high school. Maths went pretty fast by, Chemistry too, but during Biology, we had to make a project for the final grade, which will affect the overall grade by a huge percent, which completely got my attention.

But that wasn’t all.

Mrs. Green insisted on assigning us partners…And I was to do the project with none other than Billy Hargrove, which made me gulp in anxiety and start to slightly scratch at my neck, not daring to look at him…Or anyone, for the matter.

Mrs. Green: Kat, Billy, may I talk to you at the end of the class for a moment? Billy: Sure. Me: Okay…

After this, the class went on as if nothing happened, but I could basically feel the burning and poisonous glares the many girls in my class would throw at me. After all, who wouldn’t want to be partnered up with THE King Billy?

Ha.

Me.

What a fool.

All I did the whole class was to draw on my notebook, habit which I found out managed to calm down my anxieties pretty well, even if I didn’t really pay attention to the teacher…But hey, for someone like me, it’s no big deal. After all the other students left the classroom, I grabbed slowly got up and went in front of Mrs. Green, not managing to look in her eyes, my gaze fixed on the floor as I bit my lip and fiddling with my fingers. Billy, as well, stood just next to me, but he looked extremely laid back.

Mrs.Green: Billy, I am sure you are aware that, despite your pretty good grades, slightly above average, in most subjects, you are somehow failing Biology. So, I wanted to ask you, is it just disinterest, or are you not understanding something? I thought that, compared to Mathematics, Chemistry and Physics, this would be at least a bit easier. Billy: Well, uh…I dunno, I guess I don’t really get it or something. I guess I started with the wrong foot and continued even worse and…Yeah, you get it. Mrs.Green: Kat, dear, I am very sorry to ask this of you, since I know you’re extremely shy, but would it be okay with you if you were to help Billy with Biology? You told me you want to pursue Medicine at University, and so far you’ve been exceeding all expectations at my subject, which is why I paired you two up. Just a bit of tutoring, once in a while, if you both agree. Billy: If it helps with my grades, I don’t see why not. Mrs.Green: Excellent! What do you say, dear? Me: Uh, w-well, I…Uhm…I-I mean, s-sure, but…But a-are you sure I’m the right person for this? I-I mean, as you said, I’m painfully shy…A-And I’m afraid I might be more annoying than useful and I don’t want to waste anyone’s time and- Mrs.Green: Dear, Kat, calm down. I’ve seen you help and explain to some of your colleagues before at different subjects and you did an extraordinary job at it! I think you shouldn’t be afraid. Who knows, maybe Billy will be able to help you out with your shyness, since he’s so popular and sociable. Me: *hiding my face* I-I-I w-well, I don’t know what to say… Billy: You can start by saying ‘Yes’ ? Me: Uhm…I guess you’re right. S-Sure, I will tutor you, I am fine with that. J-Just tell me when you don’t understand or if I’m being annoying, I’ll try to stop. Billy: *chuckles* Don’t worry, toots, I’m sure we’ll get along just fine. Mrs.Green: *winks* Think of it as opportunity. It will look very good on your recommendation letter. Me: Y-You mean, you will…? Mrs.Green: *smiles* But of course, dear! How could I possibly not recommend my top student to the best University? It was supposed to be a surprise from me and your Physics and Chemistry teachers, but oops! Busted~. Me: I-I-I can’t thank you enough!! Really, thank you so much for everything you’ve done for me! I am forever grateful for you and your patience and kindness with me! Mrs.Green: *pats my head* Dear, your only fault is worrying too much and enjoying life too little. Take the advice of the bands you listen to so much and you might learn to live a bit. Now, off you go, your next class is about to start! Me: See you tomorrow, Mrs.Green! And thank you so much for everything again! Billy: Good bye, Mrs. G.

Outside of the classroom, I gripped my notebook close to my chest and walk to my locker, but Billy was still following me with a smirk on his face, and then leaned on the locker nearby.

Billy: So, I just got a very hot teacher as a reward for failing the class, the more you know. Me: I…I think it’s more of a punishment. Billy: Why’d you think that, Kitten? Me: Wh-Why did you j-just call me “Kitten” ? Billy: Mrs.G called you “Kat”, so, why not? Me: My name is Katrina, not Kitten, so please call me that. Billy: Fine, fine…Kitten. *winks* Me: *pouts* Guess I can’t convince you… Billy: You give up pretty easily, babe. It’s almost like you like that. Me: *cringes* I-It’s nothing of the sort. I-It’s just…Over the years…I learn that if saying “No” doesn’t work the first time…It won’t work no matter how many times you repeat or struggle…So might as well just get it over with. Billy: *raises an eyebrow* That sounded oddly specific. Me: *eyes widen* Ah, n-no, forget I just said that! S-Sorry, I, uh…I gotta go to Physics, excuse me. Billy: What a coincidence, I have Physics too. Why don’t we talk about the project and my tutoring on the way there? Me: Uhm…If you’re okay with it, I guess okay. Billy: Have any specific topic you wanna do? I kinda have no idea what we’ve studied so far. Care to enlighten me? Me: Well…We started with the Nervous system, followed by the Sensory organs, then Glands, the Locomotor system, Digestive system, Excretory system, Metabolism, some pretty basic Genetics, some plain Environmental things…And…Uhm…Well… Billy: *smirks* You missed out the Reproduction thingy between Excretory and Metabolism on purpose, didn’t you? Me: *gasps* Liar! You said you didn’t know! You tricked me! Billy: *chuckles* I might have. Say, toots, it’s almost like you missed it on purpose. Are you embarrassed? Hey, what about we do the project on tha- Me: NO!!!! Billy: *wide eyed* Whoa, slow down, there, I was only teasin’. Me: *slaps hand on mouth* I’m sorry! I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to shout at you! Please, don’t be mad. It’s just…I really don’t like it and it makes me feel very…Very bad. Billy: *shrugs* S'okay, I got it, don’t worry, I’m not mad. Jeez, Mrs.G was right, you really do worry too much. Me: Yeah…I’m really sorry, I told you it’d be more of a punishment than anything. I know I can be very annoying without even realising. Billy: Chill, babe, chill. So, when and where shall we meet? Me: Uhm…Tomorrow after class for the project? Billy: I have Basketball training, sorry. Me: Oh, right, you’re in the team. When’s your next match? Billy: In 2 weeks. Wanna come and cheer me? Me: *smiles* If you want me there, sure, I will be there. Billy: Huh, would ya look at that, Kitten has a pretty smile. Ya wanna make me swoon? Me: Ah, n-no, really, I’m not. Billy: You’re melting my heart, babe! Me: S-Sorry! Uhm…How about this Friday? About 5pm? At…Uhm…There’s this pretty cafe in town called “Ma Cherie” and they have amazing tea and sweets. Billy: Friday…Friday…Ah, yeah, sure. Had a date, but- Me: Oh, shoot! Okay, we can find another day so you won’t have to miss it! Billy: *chuckles* Nahh, don’t worry, I’ll just cancel. I’d much rather stay with you than with her. Me: *bites lip* Uhmm…I…Flattered? I think? Billy: Good then, it’s a date, see you then, sweet cheeks! Me: WAIT WHAT?!

I stopped in my tracks but he only laughed and waved at me, jogging ahead in another direction. It was only then that I realised that I was in front of the Physics classroom and he, in fact, had a complete other subject, not Physics.

Smooth bastard…

And so, Wednesday came to an end, Thursday as well, Friday went by unnoticed and then, I had to go full speed to the Animal shelter nearby to help out. They never told me how much to stay, seeing that my schedule was hectic due to College and Uni preps, so I would just come and go whenever I could. Problem is, I lost track of time and when I looked back at the watch again, it said 4:46pm.

F U C K.

I bid the workers farewell and ran to my motorbike, going as far as I could back to Hawkings and at the cafe, getting all the two bags full of books and running into the cafe, and looking at my watch at the same time.

5:13pm.

Kill me please.

Entering the cafe, I nod at the waitress, as I’m a regular here and we’re on friendly terms, and scan for Billy, who was writing something in a notebook. I rush to take the seat opposite, but before I sat down and let the books fall to the ground, I start apologising to Billy a bit too much.

Me: I’M SO SORRY!! I-I really didn’t mean to be late, but it’s entirely my fault and I feel horrible for making you wait for me! Please don’t be mad, I-I’ll make up to you! I’ll pay each time we go out to study, okay? S-So take anything you want a-and I’ll pay! I know it won’t really make a difference bu- Billy: Babe, sit down and breathe. Me: H-Huh? Billy: I’m not mad. I can clearly see you rushed to get here. Lost track or time, huh? What were you doing? Me: Yeah, I know, I’m stupid. I got a watch today so I can make sure I leave at the right time, but I forgot to check it and…I am late. So, uhm…Y'know how I mentioned I want to pursue Vet Medicine at Uni? I work at an animal shelter nearby and it takes sort of…Almost an hour to get here. Well, more like 40 minutes, but I rushed and got here in like 25. It kinda helps to get in at a top Uni…With a scholarship. I couldn’t afford to study at University otherwise, so I gotta do what it takes. Billy: Well, babe, you look pretty hot in you lab coat. I wanna see you like this more often. Me: M-My lab coat…? AH, DAMN, I FORGOT TO TAKE IT OFF! Godamn it! Billy: *chuckles* You’re pretty amusing, doll. Come on, sit down and let’s order. Me: Okay. Leila, dear, could you please come and take our order? Leila: Hey, Kat, rushed again from the shelter I see. Regular? Me: For me, yes. Billy, what would you want? Billy: Just a black coffee, thanks. Me: Are you sure? Billy: Yeah, sure. Me: O-Okay… Leila: Okay, then. A Cherry Vanilla tea with extra cinnamon, a chocolate cake and a black coffee coming right up! Me: Thank you for your time, Lei-Lei! Leila: Any time! Billy: Seems you calmed down a bit. Me: Yeah…This place always manages to sooth down my anxieties. Uhm…I literally only come here every time I want to study. Billy: I’m not surprised. It’s pretty nice, I guess. Me: *smiles* I’m happy that you liked it. Billy: Say, forgot to ask you on Wednesday, but today I see you have a Metallica Tshirt. Are they your boyfriend’s? Me: *blushes* B-Boyfriend? But I don’t have a boyfriend, what do you mean? Billy: You don’t? How come? Me: Why are you surprised, who’d want someone like me? Trust me when I say this, I know what I’m talking about. Billy: But you’re smart and pretty, what’s not to like? Me: Many things. So uhm…These are my Tshirts. 90% of my tops have band imprints. And…Well…AC/DC, Iron Maiden and Metallica are my Top 3 favourite bands. I have all their vinyls and cassettes. Billy: You just keep getting hotter and hotter the more I know you. Me: Hahaha, no, no way that could ever happen. Billy: If I were to give you one of my band Tshirts, would you wear it on our next date? Me: D-Date?! C-Come on, Billy, I’m literally the last person you’d want to date, I can assure you. Billy: What if I prove you otherwise? Me: How do you know you’re my type? Billy: *smirks* Oh~? So I’m out of your league, sweet cheeks? Me: Ah-…! Wait, no, I didn’t mean it like that! I didn’t want to insult or offend you, I’m sorry! Billy: Just teasin’, relax. Me: *pouts* Whatevs… Billy: So, wadya say, dollface? About us? Me: D-Don’t you think we should, like, get to know each other first? Become friends and trust each other and all that? Billy: Awww, toots wants one of those cutesy romance novel relationships, how adorable. Me: *blushes* W-Well…Y-Yeah…I guess…I know I’m asking for too much…And there’s no way in hell that could ever happen to me…S-So…I just…I guess…I kinda gave up on even thinking of dating long ago. Billy: *sighs* Maybe your expectations are too high of people that are too low. People suck, y'know? The world sucks. You’re expecting a happily ever after? Me: If I ever get to be in a relationship, I want it to be that kind of shelter that would be protective from all the chaos and evilness in the world. The only place where you can feel safe and be yourself. And if that Happily Ever After, as you call it, won’t happen with another person as my significant other…Then I’ll be very content with saving animals’ lives and travelling the world at my leisure. Billy: *smirks* Have I ever told you you’re pretty hot when you speak like that? Me: Uhm…Okay, so, I was thinking that maybe we could talk about the Nervous system in our project? Leila: Kat, you don’t need to talk about the Nervous system. You literally ARE a Nervous system. Me: … *laughs* Oh jesus, that was a good one. I won’t forget that…Actually, I might even use it as a joke when I do the presentation! Leila: *winks* Don’t forget the author’s right! Me: Okay, okay! As per my lovely barista friend joked, instead of presenting you the Nervous system, I will introduce myself, for I am, in fact, a Nervous system. Leila: Hey, Billy, was it? Please film her or something, I want to see that part. Billy: Consider it done. Me: I call this a conspiracy! Don’t try to overthrow my reign! Leila: Oh, shut up, nerd. Here’s your tea, honey and cake, and here’s your coffee. Good luck with your project! Me: Thanks, dear! Billy: Okay, that looks and smells pretty good. Me: *smiles* Wanna try? I can give you half of everything, if you want? Billy: Y'sure? Me: *nods* Sure! Do you like your tea sweetened? I usually put a lot of honey in it. Billy: Make it as you like and I’ll drink after. Me: Here, you can eat from my plate as much as you want. I usually drink the tea first anyways. Billy: So generous, toots, you’re melting my heart. Me: Ahem. So, the Nervous system? Billy: I have no idea what that’s all about, but just for the sake of the joke, I will say yes. Me: Cool! I kinda thought of specialising in Neurosurgery after Uni. B-But that’s really very far in the future, so it’s pretty irrelevant. Billy: Teach me your magic, babe, and let’s fuck them up big time.

Pretty excited, I got the books from the bag and handed them to him, showing him the tons of notes, scribblings, ideas, details and so on that I’ve gathered so far, and for the next 4 hours, everything we smoothly, but we had to leave because Leila had to close, and we decided to meet again on Monday at lunch time in the courtyard and study while we eat.

I have to admit, the time spent with Billy was…Well…Really nice. It seemed almost like he was a complete other person, not the scary guy who looked like he would snap at anyone if they even as much as blinked around him. Sure, he was a huge flirt, but it didn’t seem too…Ill-willed, to say the least. I just hope it won’t turn into a crush or something. I absolutely canNOT and will NOT allow myself to catch feelings…Not again…Not after everything that has happened. He is right. There is no Happily Ever After, so why bother?

The weekend passed by very fast as I prepared notes for both the project and some tutoring ideas for the Nervous System, since we had to start with the very beginning of Biology, so after the first 3 classes in the morning, I tried to rush outside, but I got pushed into a locker with a boy that I couldn’t recall the name of, but I knew was pretty popular…Like many others. I think his name was Dennis or something, and he wasn’t alone, but surrounded by 3 cheerleaders, Clarisse, Carol and Christine, or the Triple C as they were called.

Boy: Hey, freak, 'sup? Me: Uhm…Hi. Boy: Didn’t you hear me? SPEAK UP! Me: I-I Said hi! Boy: I SAID SPEAK UP!! Me: HI! Boy: Thaaat’s more like it, you ugly sow. Now, what the hell were you doing around King Billy? What you’re tryina get him to like you with that pity party of yours? Your face implores pity and sympathy, but you’re nothing more than a nerd! Me: W-We have to make a p-project together… Carol: Yeah, right, as if! You have the goo-goo eyes for him! Y'know, just 'cause he likes the bands you claim to like, doesn’t mean he likes YOU! I bet you only like that music 'cause HE likes it! Me: N-No…That’s not true…

By now, my eyes were watering, and Dennis pinned my wrists above my head and started screaming very close to my face. I could feel a panic attack beginning to form at an alarmingly fast rate.

Clarisse: Aww, look at her! What, gonna freak out again and cry? Christine: Pshh, yeah, right. What a stupid crybaby. Never got past the stage of a 10 year old? Dennis: You and your stupid red hair, better stop hanging out with Billy, or else you’re gonna get it. Me: B-But I h-have t-to- Carol: *slaps me* Billy. Is. Mine. Slut!

After she slapped me, everyone around started laughing and belittling me again, but I couldn’t get out of there because Dennis was exponentially stronger than me, so I knew there was no use in even bothering. A booming voice, however, echoed in the hallway, making me flinch at the noise. “SILENCE! What the hell is going on here?!” the deep voice rang out, a funeral silence taking over, only my soft whimpers being heard.

Dennis: STOP CRYING, YOU BITCH! Didn’t you hear our King asked for silence?! Me: S-Sorry… Dennis: And open your eyes when he’s here, stop being so disrespectful for someone clearly superior to you! Come on, now, on your knees, like the little bitch that you are!

Dennis laughed as he put his hand on my throat, squeezing a bit before throwing me to the ground, in front of Billy. I could only tremble on the ground, not daring to move. I learnt it the hard way that getting away always made it worse.

Billy is the most popular guy in the High school, making all the ex-popular guys hang out with him to gain popularity. He has always been the talk of the school, the womanizer, the rebel, the cool guy everyone loved and feared. Despite everything, I expected him to side with his friends…Even if a little part of me wished for him not to.

The silence in the halls was far more excruciatingly painful than the mockings and the laughter, but it soon vanished as a voice darker and lower than before started talking. He was clearly pissed off.

Billy: …What the fuck were you doing here…? Dennis: We were teaching this bitch a lesson, of course! Make her remember her rightful place! Clarisse: No, no, if you were doing that, you’d have thrown her in the trash bin, 'cause that’s what she is! Carol: Hey, Christine, look at her! She’s staying there like she wants to suck King Billy’s dick! What a shameless slut, on her knees in front of everyone! Billy: Did I, even once, ask ANY of you to do anything like this…? Dennis: Well, no, but she’s been rubbing her pathetic germs all over you! Following you like some lost puppy just 'cause you’re popular, and even more! Lying to us! Carol: Ha, yeah! She kept saying she’s dating you and that you already fucked! Pshh, whore! Me: I…Never… Carol: Oh, shut up, nobody cares what you’re saying, get a hint! Billy: Are you 4 fucking out of your GOD DAMN MINDS?! Dennis: Uhm…B-Billy, what’s the matter? Billy: WHO THE FUCK TOLD YOU TO DO THAT TO HER?! SHE’S MY PROJECT PARTNER AND MY TUTOR, OF COURSE SHE’S HANGING AROUND WITH ME! You fucking idiots, I’m gonna FUCKING KILL ALL OF YOU! All of you stay around me like whores on the sidewalk wanting to get some cheap money, but you’re all good for nothing! Dennis: Come on, Billy, you’re new here, but she’s a freak, okay? I mean, look at her! There are only bad rumours about her and you should hear what her EXes say about her!

Before Dennis could say another word, he was slammed on the locker behind him and choked. I cringed at the sudden noise, but when I saw the outright rage on Billy’s face as he choked Dennis, he drew back one of his arms, wanting to punch him, but I threw myself on his arm.

Me: Billy…Please don’t… Billy: Get back, dollface. This fuckass needs to be taught some discipline the hard way! Me: Billy…Please, I beg of you. Please let him go. Please. Billy: But look at you, they made you cry! I can’t let them get away with this! Me: Billy…Please, for me, please don’t do it. Please stop. Please. Let’s go work on the project. Please. I beg you with all my heart. Billy: *glaring* What the hell is wrong with everyone in this fucking town?! You’re all a bunch of submissive fucktards with no brains at all!

Billy sneered, throwing Dennis away from him and walking down the corridor. I took 3 deep breaths to calm myself, before I ran to him and hugged him tightly from behind, making him freeze in his tracks, extremely tense.

Me: I-I’m very sorry, Billy. I know I only bring you troubles. Even now, I can feel that you hate me touching you like this, but it was the only way I could think of thanking you. And…And…I really appreciate you saving me…And not fighting in my presence. Billy: I really don’t get you. You just stood there, letting them do whatever the hell they wanted with you! There was no struggle, no fight in you! Nothing!

By this point, I let my arms fall down my sides and he turned around to face me, yet my gaze was still on the floor.

Me: You really think I could have gotten out of there? That I could have managed to throw Dennis off of me? Look at me, Billy. My arms are literal noodles, I can’t even punch. Hell, sometimes I struggle to open the water bottle cap. And if I tried to scream…Who do you think would have helped me? Harrington? Wheeler? The lovely Carol and Tina? Or Tommy? The only person who was okay with me in this high school has been Jonathan Byers, but people hate him too, so I can’t possibly make him get bullied more because of me. What would you have me do? It’s been 3 years already…What’s one more? Billy: …You’re so godamn irritating. Me: I know…I’m sorry. I’m really sorry for causing you so much trouble. I…I will go tell Mrs. Green to assign you a new project partner and I will continue tutoring you, if you wish, where people won’t have to see us in the same room. Billy: Did I ask you to do that? Me: N-No, but- Billy: But nothing. Shut up and let’s go, you’re supposed to be tutoring me today. Me: I-I know, but we said outside, and if people see you with me- Billy: Then let’s skip. I don’t have Basketball practice today, so I don’t really care. Me: I-I…I never skipped before… Billy: *shrugs* There’s always a first time for everything. C'mon, if you get in trouble, you just say I kidnapped you or somethin’, chill out. Me: A-Are you sure about this…? Billy: Yeah, yeah. Hop along, I’ll drive. Me: Where are we going? Billy: My place. My parents won’t be coming home tonight so nobody to disturb us. Me: Uhm…Well… Billy: I won’t do anything to you, fuck’s sake. Me: W-Well…If you’re sure it’s no problem… Billy: Get in the car, then. Me: B-But my motorbike- Billy: You have a motorbike? Me: Y-Yeah…Couldn’t really afford a car. And it’s pretty neat. Billy: Fuck, babe, you’re so hot. Me: Ah, I-I’m really not. Billy: I’ll get ya to your house and pick you up tomorrow then. C'mon, sweet cheeks, lemme show you my love. Me: Okay, okay.

He winked at me before signaling me with his head to follow him to his car, where he patted the hood very proudly and smirked, leaning on the door. He got inside, starting the ignition, which was a cue for me to get inside too, putting on my seat belt and gripping it tightly.

Billy: How d'ya like it? Me: It’s very pretty. What car is it? Billy: '79 Camaro, Chevrolet. Complete chick magnet, ya get me? Me: It is very nice. Billy: Fancy some music! Me: Oh, yes!

Smirking at me, he put “You shook me all night long” by Scorpions at max volume, making me grin at him in glee and start singing the lyrics of the song, and he followed my lead, making both of us scream like idiots above the music. Then, the perfect Mixtape with AC/DC songs started, featuring “Highway to hell”, “Hells bells”, “You shook me all night long”, “Dirty deeds done dirt cheap” and my favourite, “T.N.T.”, but by the end of it, we already got to his house, which made me pout a bit before laughing and getting out of the car.

Me: Thanks for this, Billy! It was super fun! Nobody I know listens to the same kind of music I do, and being able to sing with someone else was sooo cool! Billy: Next time, try screaming my name, 'cause damn that was sexy as hell. Me: *laughs* Don’t be silly. Billy: *winks* I’m not.

He guided me to his room which was filled with band posters over which I started gushing about as he brought some snacks and soda for us to munch on as we study. I took off my boots before I jumped on the bed criss-crossed as I spread my noted for today’s tutoring, repeating some things myself, so I won’t stutter explaining too much, but before I realised it, he already threw the bags of crisps on the bed over my notes, making me yelp in shock.

Billy: You get scared pretty easily. Me: Y-Yeah, I mean, that was pretty unexpected. Uhm…Let’s clean up a bit, you made a mess of my notes. Oh, bring your notebook, you’ll need it. O-Oh, right, I brought coloured crayons, I wasn’t sure you had…And your sister might have needed them. Billy: How did ya know I had a sister? Me: Well, I kinda guessed. Both you and her transferred from Cali on the same day, at the same time. Billy: Why do you know about little brats? Me: *shrugs* I have a few little friends. They don’t mind that I’m a nerd…'Cause they are too. It’s pretty fun, actually! Billy: *raises eyebrow* Right. So, why’d I need crayons? Me: Drawings, of course! To understand Biology better, one must need tons of schemes and drawings. I already have mine and I will give them to you for as long as you need, but I’d appreciate it if you were to draw them by yourself too, since it will really help you understand and memorise better what you’re about the learn. Billy: Right…Okay, fine. Me: So, if it’s okay with you, should we start talking about Cells? Shapes, roles, the organelles inside it and what they do. Then, we should cover the tissues a bit, before starting to talk particularities, mainly, to explain the Neuron, how reflexes work and why, and then cover the nerves and organs. Billy: *blank look* Good luck. Me: Huh? What do you mean? Billy: It’s gonna be tough getting me to understand this shit. Me: I don’t think so. I have faith in you. Mrs.Green said that all your grades are above average, which is really good! If you manage to get a B at Biology as your final mark, then you have a very strong chance at a scholarship! Billy: How d'ya know that? Me: You are the best at sports, Billy. The teacher always praises you, despite all the…Uhmmm…L-Let’s call it problematic behaviour. I’m sorry. And, uhm…Our highschool has 1 Sports Scholarship, and 1 Studies Scholarship. Billy: And clearly, you’re the one to get the Studies one, right? Me: *blushes* Well…Y-Yes, it seems so. Billy: And how are you so sure I’m the one qualified for the Sports one? Me: Well…I…I spend a lot of time around teachers. It’s kind of a safe haven where nobody can bully me, and I get to find out a few things as well. Billy: Holy shit, you’re such a Vixen~! You, little, naughty vixen! Me: *chuckles* I…I’ve been called Fox before. Billy: And rightfully so. Me: Y-Yeah, carrot hair, I know. Billy: Oh, shush, it’s hot. And damn, looks damn good with your green eyes. Me: *clears throat* N-Nobody said that before. Uhm, s-so! As I was saying, because you’re currently the top choice…That’s actually why Mrs.Green wanted you to pair up with me. She saw potential in you and she didn’t want it wasted. Before you, there was Steve Harrington, but since you came… Billy: Oh, babe, trust me, I’m gonna come very soon if you keep praising me like that. Me: *confused* What do you mean? Billy: You…Didn’t get that? Me: *shakes head* Should I have? Billy: Never mind. So, what am I supposed to do? Me: Basically, get that B in Biology, win at least 3 of your upcoming Basketball matches until the end of the year…And I think it’s settled. Billy: I’d kiss you right now. Me: *scratches the back of my neck* You wouldn’t like it. So, uhm…Is this enough of a motivator for you? Billy: It could be…Okay, babe, work the hell outta me. Me: S-So, I was thinking, if it’s okay with you, that I should give you a test after each chapter we finish. Like a revision. I think it would be nice and it would help you not forget some things, and also, see where you didn’t understand well enough and all that stuff. Billy: What’s the passing grade, teacher? Me: *flustered* D-Don’t call me that, please, I would be a terrible teacher. I think…A 75% should suffice Billy: That’s quite a lot, babe. Me: *smiles* You can do it, Billy. Your future self is going to thank you for your struggles and hard work. Billy: How about a motivator? Me: Isn’t the Scholarship enough? Billy: It is…But Y'know, it’s gon’ be hard. Me: I suppose you’re right…Okay, what do you have in mind? Billy: *smirks* Each time I get a passing grade at your tests…Let me kiss you. Me: *eyes wide* Wh-What?! Billy: Aww, come on, babe, it’s just a kiss and it’s gon’ help motivate me to study hard. Don’t cha wanna help me get that scholarship? Me: *blushes furiously* I-I-I…Wh-Why w-would you want that?! Billy: Because you’re adorable as hell and I like you. Me: L-Like you like all girls? Billy: Who said I liked them? They’re all dumb and want the same thing. Can you guess? Me: *shrugs* Dunno. Billy: Come on, babe, think, you’re smart. Me: I guess? Billy: You’re the smartest babe I’ve ever got the pleasure to meet. All fucktards at school want just one thing, 'cause they’re all shallow brain dead suckers. They aaaaaall just wanna fuck. Me: A-And don’t you do the same? Billy: I do. Me: Th-Then why’d you want me to kiss you? To add me to your list or something? Billy: Nahh, I’d be a real shithead if I were to take advantage of you like that. Me: *mutters* Wouldn’t be the first one… Billy: *raises eyebrow* Do you trust me? Me: Don’t take it personal, I don’t really trust anyone. Billy: Huh. Not bad. Let’s make a deal, toots. I’ll do my best to raise up to your expectations and you’ll give me those little rewards. If by the time we finish everything you won’t be satisfied with how I behave, then you can hate me all your life and I won’t bother you again. Me: B-But I don’t wanna hate you. Billy: *gets closer to my face* Even better. So, wadya say, sweetling? Me: Uhmm…Well…I-I don’t know… Billy: Come on, Kitten, what’s the harm? It’s just a kiss. Me: *blushes* Uhm…Uhmmm…F-Fine…If it will help you… Billy: Thanks, babe! Now, how about I see what to expect~? Me: NO!

With each question, he just kept getting closer and closer to my face, while I leaned backwards, until the last where I got so flustered that I didn’t realise I was completely on the edge of the bed… Until I fell off with a high-pitched squeal and a thud, while he just laughed his ass off looking at me, as I pouted and looked at him done with life.

Me: You could’ve caught me, y'know? Billy: Sorry, toots, I was too shocked to realise. But, shoulda seen your face, t'was hilarious! Priceless! Me: Yes, yes, I’m hilarious, ha-ha! Just wait till you see how hilarious the tests are gonna be! And I’ll laugh in your face like you do right now! Billy: Ohhh, mrrrr, babe, you’re on fire! Fine, you’re on, then! But I’ll show ya it’s gon’ be worth it. Me: You better.

Stretching a bit I get back in bed next to him and putting on my best game-face, I grab the first pages of notes, the drawings and schemes and start explaining him in detail every little thing, telling him to repeat what I said from time to time, to make sure he stays focused, and make him explain what he understood so far, in his own words.

Despite everything, he was actually really great company to have and I’m kinda…Actually, really glad that Mrs.Green made me be his partner for this project, and more, tutor him. If only he could tone down his excessive flirting, he’s surprisingly soft and nice. Or well…That’s what I think. I could also be wrong, like I’ve been so many times before, and I wouldn’t be shocked in the least bit.

But…I really hope I’m not wrong.

Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8

@klassickb

[imperialsea-a]

ELIZABETH’S IN-DEPTH RP PLOTTING CHEAT-SHEET.

          Want new-and-exciting plots for your character? Long to reach out to more of your followers, but don’t know where to start? Fear not! Fill out this form and give your RP partners both present and future all the of juicy jumping off points they need to help you get your characters acquainted.

          Be sure to tag the players whose characters YOU want more cues to interact with, and repost, don’t reblog! Feel free to add or remove sections as you see fit. Template here.

Mun name: Rem (not that blue-haired anime girl or DN, it’s from my old blog!) OOC Contact: Contact me through the Tumblr IM system or my Discord! My Discord is: imperialsea#1818. Please tell me your URL if you message me there so I know who you are!

Now, onto the heart of the post!

   ♛   Who the heck is my muse, anyway? Elizabeth Eva Alexandria Cross, the only biological daughter of Kaien Cross, her father (a canon vk char), and Eva Liliya Cherie Cross, her mother (an oc muse)! Elizabeth is a vampire hunter by blood like all in her family before her! But, shh! Your character isn't supposed to know that .  .  .  unless they're also a hunter .  .  .  or a perhaps a vampire (since her family from both sides are famous hunters, but even then they don't have to know she's a vamp killer if you don't want them to) .  .  .  or they're some sort of ally to her / the hunters association since she can't just tell anyone her actual work on a whim. Where she's from, the existence of vampires are a secret from most of humanity and it's her job to kill the dangerous people-hurty ones and keep that nice and secret so as to avoid a world war! 'Nothing about her is complicated at all', I say, lying through my teeth like Bethy does to society every day by keeping her job and true lifestyle hidden :'D

Further information below the cut, please take time to read if you’re stuck on what to plot and how Bethy operates!

   ♛   Points of Interest:           - She was born and raised to fight against unruly beasts and composed foes alike. Despite her youth, she's a one-woman powerhouse and is not afraid to take herself down with an opponent if she deems it necessary. She's like the Smash player who hits the fake smash ball to take out an enemy on their last legs, even at the expense of her own life. She'll do it! Except in Smash she'd probably just win the match because she had an extra life and not, you know, not die forever for real in a last grand battle.

          - She's got vamp genes all over the place and is rare among hunters. She's biologically immortal like a Pureblood despite not being a vampire herself and is living testimony of what her predecessors took from Purebloods both by honorable bestowal of blood from the mysterious Hooded Woman, and straight up [insert painting of Jupiter Devouring His Son here]. Her great grandparent is 3k+ years old, her father is 200+ for devouring his own twin-- it's messy as mythology, but anime :'D  She herself is only 18 on default though (19 in K Crossover--), the youngest of her entire bloodline, and she can still be slain in battle even if she is much hardier than a typical human being. She's also sensitive to auras, and capable of sensing vampires.

          - Things characters might notice? She's ghostly pale and kind of looks like she stepped out of The Last Unicorn. She looks cold, sophisticated, and vaguely otherworldly-- she really doesn't radiate the friendliest of vibes unless she's doing something she loves, and the calculated yet seemingly effortless grace of her movements are prominent in and outside of combat. She is descended from an ancient royal line, and those posh, stuffy mannerisms and formal speech pattern live on through her even if the Adrasteian monarchy no longer exists.

          - She truly isn't a trigger-happy person, whatever the title of 'hunter' implies, and keeps a level head in most situations. Sure, Bethy looks as if she could bite someone's head off and can display some seriously threatening flashes of anger, but she's not going to do something rash and will only resort to drawing her weapons in a serious matter. She's here to save lives, maintain peace, and keep order, not disrupt it and set off a war! No pressure on her, right?

         - She is also notably, NOT a high school student, though she may be mistaken for a high school senior or young college student since her age fits the bill. Elizabeth actually graduated from her high school at age sixteen and took to hunting full-time immediately after. She was convinced to slow it down by her grandparents and began preparing for college when her assignment at Cross Academy arrived and, uh, pretty tragically, hasn’t been able to attend any classes due to her work demands. Come to choose between the world and personal fulfillment? Her conscience only let her have one choice; a hunter must hunt.

    ♛   What they’ve been up to recently:           - Work. There's hardly a time when this girl isn't working or planning what to do next, and the workload only grows after the previous president is outed as a dishonorable, self-serving traitor to the hunters. She's seriously injured after trading blows with him and is promptly benched to deal with the fallout and mental agony, but she's back within a year (and in K's crossover? Only six months later!).

          - Having said that, Elizabeth does have days off and will spend them quietly with her friends, or alone with music and a rejuvenating swim.

          - Depending on the time in her life? Her life circumstances vary drastically-- she can go from a young huntress travelling on her own as duty demands, or she can be a mother of five children and trusted right hand of the new hunter president, Zero Kiryuu. She lives for a long time, so she's always up to something! And of course, she's always motivated to fight for a better future. 

   ♛   Where to find them:            - Aside from work, check the beach! Or find her on methods of cross-continental transportation since she travels around the world for her job (she walks whenever possible, so it's rare to see her on a bus, but she’ll begrudgingly take one or a train)! Otherwise, a place like an aquarium, clothing store, or coffee shop, or any place in a city is your best chance.... write w me pls... q-q she is Around Somewhere.

          - If not found in any of those places and your character is someone inside Cross Academy, she can be found there, helping the prefects in some way and is familiar enough with the building to help out new students if they ask.

    ♛   Current Plans:           - Elizabeth is chained to her work as a hunter for as long as she draws breath, or until there is no need for her to end hostile vampires. Her ultimate goal is to keep the world from falling into a repeat, all-out war between vampires and humanity. Her living and family situation might change through the years, but that will always be her primary drive-- she's got an indomitable will.

    ♛   Desired Interactions:           - please ovq

          - In all seriousness, I’m up for pretty much anything. She needs more friends, more enemies, people to protect, people to be protected by, people she looks up to, people who legitimately unnerve her, everything! I just don’t feel comfortable killing her. Elizabeth fought really hard to get her future and deserves to find comfort after her entire childhood-young adult life was spent thinking the only thing of worth she had was her role as a huntress. I do really, really love angst though, so anything else goes, really c:

     ♛   Offered Interactions ( please sit tight for this! it will be divided into multiple sections! ) :           - IF YOUR CHARACTER IS HUMAN:                - She’ll assume your muse is an average civilian until shown otherwise (be it with unusual powers, whacky aura, combat prowess, or prior knowledge from a report or something-- a plot specific thing). Unless they truly know about vampires / work with the Hunters Association, Elizabeth will not be sharing any information about who or what she is without a legitimate reason (such as the human character being bitten by a Pureblood and thus is being turned into a vampire themselves). However, the other party being kept in the dark about vampires can open the door to a more relaxed Elizabeth without her professional, perfectionist mindset. She’s more likely to have a pleasant conversation with humans since they have no part in the hunt-- but in that same vein, she does aim to keep them at a certain distance and not develop a deep emotional bond (but she’s also a lot softer than she looks and acts and tends to care for others quickly, should they get along). It’s a tricky slope .  .  . She’s thawed out and the nicer aspects of her personality are far more prominent, but at the same time, she’s not being entirely genuine. Give her time and she’ll become more open about personal things, just, not her work.

               - Applies to her K Proj. Crossover.  Working with S4, Elizabeth takes some time to adjust, but ultimately loves the organization and the people within it. They’re an exception to her ‘no ties with average humans’ rule because....errr.... they’re not the average human she’s used to protecting and in that verse they’re aware of her occupation and peculiar heritage. She’s not as cold first impressions might suggest and loves Reisi’s weird af team building nights, it’s hard for her to not have a soft spot for them, even as an outsider and unofficial member (as in, she has none of the abilities the Blues have, but she has her natural abilities).

         - IF YOUR CHARACTER IS A HUNTER:                 - Elizabeth is a known figure in hunter society; her great grandfather, grandfather, and aunt were previous heads of the organization and each are still alive at present. So, it probably makes more sense if your hunter character at the very least knows about her-- unless they’re an off-series muse in which case go wild and do what you think is best! I always did like the idea of two vampire hunters chilling together with neither one knowing the other is a fellow hunter until they’re attacked by a vamp and they’re both like ‘Oh!’

               - A simple but always reliable plot idea is two hunters on a joint mission! It’s really important to know that Bethy does not take kindly to poor performance and expects her partner to take whatever assignment they have seriously. If not? Things get tundra-cold really fast-- o-o;; People’s lives are at stake and in her opinion, if a hunter wants to mope or complain about their blood-given obligation, they’re not fit to be hunters in the first place. ‘Can’t do the job? Then finish what you started with me if you have any shred of integrity, and get thee gone’ sort of thing. Otherwise, uh :’D;; she’s highly cooperative and always aims to reach the outcome with the least amount of damage.

               - As a teenager, she attended a hunter-run private academy in Adrasteia for four years. If it’s possible for your muse to attend (as in, they are from a vampire hunter family and can pass the rigorous entrance exams), throw em in for a slightly younger, less stringent Bethy? A national fencing champion at the top of her classes, and great granddaughter to the legendary hellfire headmaster, Elizabeth’s not easily missed! It could be the start to an amicable relationship to carry into future interactions?

        - IF YOUR CHARACTER IS A VAMPIRE:                 - Bluntly put, for vampires, it’s probably better to interact with Elizabeth after Cross Academy has fallen in the large battle that took place there. Her mother is revealed to have been alive and held captive as a vampire, she’s already friends with a hunter/vamp, her two friends turned out to be Purebloods, and ‘oh....my mother and father got together again and now I’ve got a younger vampire brother’ .....and her boyfriend’s half sister is also a vampire who marries the former vamp senate heir..... so...vamps everywhere; she simply accepts them as part of the family. Prior to that, while she isn’t hostile to vampires and certainly has no intention to attack a vamp unjustly, it’s not a place she’s eager to put herself in. Depending on how threatened she feels, she’ll even swallow her pride and keep her head down-- mostly.

               - If your muse is a hunter-turned-vampire, she doesn’t treat them as a vampire, rather, she still sees them as a compatriot, like in the case of Zero Kiryuu. Whether or not your muse received the blood of their keeper is up to you, but in the case that they haven’t-- she’s always there to assist in granting mercy whenever the time comes :’)

       - IF YOUR CHARACTER DOES NOT FIT INTO ANY OF THE ABOVE CATEGORIES / REGARDING OTHER VERSES:                - Please help me find something that works, I’m willing to try! Memes are incredibly helpful! Send one in, the tag is here, and we can go from there!

                  - My currently finished and ready-to-use Crossover Verse is K Proj., which can be read about right here.

      ♛   Current Open Post/s: Linked right here. There's no expiration date to these, and it doesn't matter if another person has replied to one, you are more than welcome to reply to one if it catches your eye at all.

      ♛   Anything else?:  YEAH, wow I am so sorry that got so long. Please note that this post may be updated periodically!