#I’m actually really interested in why specifically they’re targeting her

[daydreamerdrew]

More Fun Comics (1935) #58

[starwrighter]

1/?? Halloween prompt

I’ve got brain rot for creepy Deadserious content but only when it’s only seen as creepy by outsiders. (I know I’m writing a fic with a similar plot but it’s different I swear! Also my grammar is shit because I’m getting dental work done tomorrow and I’m nervous) Tw for stalker behavior

So Damian has a crush on Danny and immediately goes about acting on these feelings much to onlookers horror. Danny is swooning because someone made the effort to do a background check on him. Danny thinks Damian doing this is really smart because, he could be a serial killer for ancients sake why would you risk that? Others say this is a horrible invasion of privacy.

Damian not realizing he's being creepy (being liminal and being an ex assassin, turned vigilante wasn't doing him any favors) Plus Danny also not realizing it's creepy unless you relay Damian behavior towards him with different names.

Damian's just being a textbook stalker, breaking into his house and shit and Danny's all like "awwww he likes me" because this is just normal ghostly courting rituals! His dormroom isn't his lair so Damian breaking in doesn't feel like he's violating any sort of boundary. To him it's like a friend showing up at the coffee shop you work at to say hi.

Danny's had stalkers before, he's very cautious of his behavior to insure he never stalked anyone. Being stalked back in Amity was a horrific experience for him. From cameras in the locker rooms at school (wes) to cameras in his bathroom and bedroom at home (Vlad)! He couldn't feel safe anywhere! To Danny Damian's not a stalker, he's his protector. Nobody seems to understand when he tries to explain this though they just look at him like he's lost his mind.

Damian’s not subtle at all and Danny’s kicking his feet like a lovesick school girl who found out her crush likes her back. Overall it’s super cute from their points of view Damian’s planning an official confession to ask him on a date while Danny’s trying to figure out if Damian actually likes him or is just being nice. They’re just doing normal couple things but people just jump and attack Damian’s character while painting Danny as some kind of brainwashed victim.

The thing is… Danny’s become very good at appearing normal while Damian refuses to pretend to be a bumbling idiot like the rest of his family. He also refuses to dull down his personality for anything other than secret identity reasons. For these reasons since their relationship had become public, Damian had been painted by the media as a creepy possessive boyfriend who threatened Danny into a relationship. This infuriates Danny, the only one doing any kind of possession is him god damn it!

They want to be around each other all the time and that’s normal behavior for ghost/liminal couples! They live much longer than regular humans do they’re like elves, their perceptions of time are messed up. They still spend time apart they still have hobbies and an independent life, people just get hung up on the amount of time they do spend together. It’s normal behavior for them to know mountains of information about each others interests to the point they almost know more than each other. It’s normal to know each other’s schedules and background check the people they associate with. (The realms are very dangerous with shapeshifters and manipulators like spectra and Desiree who can ruin your afterlife in a matter of minutes) Their relationship is creepy to those who haven’t gone to extremes to survive.

Damian has taken to ignoring the reputation press has given him. He’s dealt with paparazzi and tabloids before it’s just frustrating to deal with. It’s when people start accusing him of hurting his beloved that really pisses him off.

(Bonus if Danny’s the one frothing at the mouth to maul a reporter while they try to paint him as a poor innocent victim)

I’mma end the prompt with this so everyone understands why Damian specifically being targeted by press. The more liminal you are the more creepy/uncanny you appear to other people and the more effort you have to put in to hide it. It’s why the bats are more believed to be Eldritch creatures than actual humans in suits. Surprisingly becoming a Halfa completely changes this effect to do the complete opposite. It’s easier for the human brain to look at a halfa and think “Innocent or normal,” Vlad and Danny were morons when it came to actually hiding their identity’s it was only their statuses as halfa’s that prevented people from comprehending them being anything other than normal.

In short Damian’s too dead to be perceived as normal while Danny’s too alive to be perceived as anything other than normal.

[coffeegnomee]

Minecraft pvp is so freaking interesting. I was thinking back to watching the Jumper pov of the Minute and Pentar ban and it was so good. Like I was on the edge of my seat and I knew how it ended. We need more group battles in Lifesteal, I beg.

1v1 pvp is just like who can get the most hits in, or just who can quick drop the other person faster. 

But group fights are sooooo different. The actual personality and experience of each member matters so much. And it doesn't show until there's at least 5 people on the battlefield. Preferably 7.

Minute, Pentar, and Jumper came with basically identical kits, very solo-minded towards their approach to pvp. They got overconfident with their secretly-netherite armor durability and 15 stacks of xp (each.)

And they, as far as I know, have very very little experience in large group battles and long pvp battles. They all fought drain season 5, but 4v3 group drain is much different than a 2v2. 

And the fight was LONG. Minute didn’t realize the change in tides until really late, not initiating the run to the trap, their ONLY trap my goodness why didn’t they set up more it’s the final days, so when the trap was already blown up they had zero backup plan. 

They didn’t start calling in people until Minute had like 2-3 stacks of xp left, that’s something you do the second you realize the tides are turning, especially when it’s an uneven 3v4.

And just listening to his coms vs Clown’s coms was just night and day. Minute doesn’t have the experience yet to know how to manage a team in a fight, how to allocate assets, choose targets, and keep the team’s morale up and on target while they’re dying. He’s said it himself that he likes the quicker fights kits with netherite sword and diamond armor.

But Clown is naturally skilled at managing his soldiers. He knows exactly who to target and how, reassigning pvp skill so it’s him, the most skilled, with the least skilled player to do maximum durability damage on Minute. Like every phrase out of his mouth is in service of optimizing the team. 

And then they came with a minor kit adjustments. Clown and Mapicc came with harming arrows because of their net strength 1 from the blessings/curses, but Minute didn’t know that strat. So it was both an: “they’re trolling” moment, but when Clown came with the same kit it was like: “wait did I miss something?” Psychological warfare right there. 

And then Mapicc had his knockback sword and Zam was on water drain duty. Those two small changes to their kit, on just two members, really sealed their victory. Mapicc was such a menace.

Which is so fascinating. Minute had been ruling the server simply through being amazing at getting out of fights and never getting into a slightly outnumbered fight. Same with Jumper. 2v2’s for them were a guaranteed win. 

But once you get 7 people on the battlefield it turns into a completely different mindset on how to turn the tides back in your favor and it’s all about targeting specific players. As Clown was targeting the strongest player on their team, pb&j needed to get drain-drop Ro so it would be a 3v2.5 (with Zam/Spep) 

And Jumper, just because of her skill level and background, doesn’t know the dynamics of who to target and when, when to be aggressive and when to back off, when to call for help and when it’s better to stay in the fight. She did absolutely her best but it was so interesting to see he true smp pvp skill after months of just being like why is she so good in every fight and undefeated against Mapicc and Zam while she says she never practices.

Lifesteal fights, and yes I’ve only ever really watched Lifesteal fights and I am fascinated in theory for how Levels fights used to go, feel so much more dirty than a normal server. It feels like other servers just get a trap off or fight completely even and it’s just skill vs skill. (And I’m feeling that even more now just observing how Flame talks about other smp pvp) 

And Clown coming into the fight with an advantage was so much stronger than Minute deciding an advantage halfway though the fight. Clown does this all the time, not taking a fight until he’s properly prepped for the specific situation. Like bringing the crystals to the finale fight to even out the playing field: he prepares to get the advantage. 

Vs Minute is too good-hearted to think that cutthroat from the start (well, except for changing the durability of their armor) He absolutely thinks cut-throat when he realizes he’s doomed, but off the bat he’s too much a superhero. He thought the fight would just be Mapicc and Ro while Zam would sit out, like what??? It’s Lifesteal, if they’re on they’re all fighting. And then they were surprised when Clown came back on to fight. They were confident, but they should have been thinking defensively and like they were doomed the second it was a 4v3. Maybe not doomed, but not like it was even. 

Much like all the lore of the server, the specific players matter so much in each scenario. Without someone, or with someone, a whole arc is different. Clown changed the tides in that fight simply from being the better team manager. Had someone else been the 4th player it would have gone completely differently. 

-----

jumper pov here

zam here fight starts 2:47:00

[lovingdabeessss]

Mini ramble cause I’m tired I’ll expand later probably

Blake and Weiss have trouble with their emotions because of their different kinds of abuse they’ve experienced but they still clearly have them, you know? They talk about them and they talk about it a lot their was a whole arc that was just them talking about their emotions very loudly at each other so having the emotions or expressing it doesn’t really bother them that much

or at least not in every environment, Yang and Ruby are the safest space they got they’ll fight each other to the death around them if they’d let them if you want to have unsavory emotions and unsavory words they’re the two people they’re both comfortable doing it around

It seems like they’re biggest issue with having negative emotions is how other people perceive them and how others react and putting up a front around others unless really comfortable

(What an incredible life changing experience it must’ve been to have that kinda safe space with people who care about you for no reason other then because they do and not for any ulterior motive after so long of not feeling like that to love someone so much you could safely hate them and they’d still ask you include you in ever conversation, it’s like that one measurement of love and comfort where if your kid complains and whines about things you make them do to you then they love you and think your safe to be around and if they’re silent and obedient and distant they think your not)

However with Yang and Ruby it’s not a front they’re not pretending to not feel the emotions they’re actually just not feeling them

They’re refusing to outright

Ruby doesn’t vent till she’s in a universe where GRIM DONT EXIST and then the emotions overwhelm her so much she DIES

Yang does let herself have negative emotions but ONLY anger which is controlled and specifically when she can take that kinda heat she expresses anger not only with the acknowledgment of the risk to herself but also often when other people are also already upset

Yangs semblance is clearly designed to make it easier for her to take hits for others this expression of anger goes along with the fact that it lights her on fire and makes her big and bright she’s making herself a bigger target

Cough cough not subtle metaphor cough cough YOU KNOW LIKE WHAT YOU DO AGAINST BEARS?!?! GOLDILOCKS!?!?!? Cough cough not subtle metaphor cough cough

(And Yang and Ruby will sometimes have breakdowns because of this where everything totally boils over and they have no way of dealing with it and they end up sobbing but even then they usually manage to do it in a closed off room)

Their lives have been centered completely around becoming huntresses and surviving through and killing grim it’s been their whole lives if the grim are attracted to negative emotions it doesn’t matter if you don’t show it on your face it’s GETTING you

To be a hunter you have to choose either:

1- go fucking crazy (all of the teachers at beacon for whatever reason)

2- be good enough at your job to be mentally ill (qrow)

3- DIE

So they just couldn’t feel shit cause they didn’t hav the skill level as children to allow that and survive

And obviously they do feel these things but it’s SOO repressed (Ruby I believe less so but it’s still beneath the surface so she’s good)

Blake and Weiss had a ton of shit to worry about but Blake was always more focused on other people as enemies and only had to personally worry about that after she joined the white fang and learned how to fight and I GENUINELY believe that the forest with Ruby was the first time Weiss’s isolated SKY CITY looking ass ever saw a real grim in person and not her sisters fake ones

And I think this is just really interesting because of how long it might’ve taken Yang and Ruby to realize the difference between their partners and them and why I think it might’ve led to interesting interactions but they’d probably never outright talk about it with them because it might lead to emotions

[foundfam2754]

S17e10 (finale!) live reactions!

Spoilers…obviously

- AHHH this is it!! finally! here. we. go.

- yeah they better not hurt my kiddos thank you very much

-I’m telling you NOW. this is all about Elias. He’s the center of the conspiracy. that’s been my theory since e1. if he didn’t say anything about GS, none of this would have started

- of course, Emily’s kidnapped again. That HAS be in Paget’s contract or something

- where are JJ and Luke?? boyf and bff up to no good again

- what did Emily do?? what’s she being judged for?

- I KNEW IT. THEY WERE GONNA DO FLASHBACKS AGAIN

- tbh this has to be the least scary time that’s she’s been “abducted and interrogated” lol

- I KNEW IT. My “Emily abduction count” was 4

- this is the “dramatic and cry-y” outfit for Pen!!

- I think my theory is right!! if you have been reading my reaction posts every week you’ll know I have a theory about this season:

that the underlying conspiracy of the season being that they’re (BAU and the gold stars) doing everything Elias wants them to do - and it was all to get him out of jail and to screw over the BAU, and it all started with Bailey’s “gold star” in 16x10. especially because the only way they can resolve it is by confiding in voit. because he knows everything and how everyone really feels. and everyone’s priorities

- lol elias’ cell looks like a college dorm

- I KNEW IT I WAS RIGHT ABOUT THE CONSPIRACY. - ELIAS. IS. THE. CENTER OF IT!!! I’m just so proud of myself

- OMG that’s not a spin I saw coming

- wait wait wait did I forget or did they JUST tell us about Emily’s sister

- aw man doug bailey’s such a good egg

- chaotic voit is so fucking funny

- also that’s a cool shot

- god doug bailey is *so* cute

- oh god - voit knew if bailey ended up on that wall, pete would fall into deeper into the conspiracy!! 🤯🤯

- BIT THROUGH HER TONGUE?

- how does emily end up being cool and such a bitch badass even when she’s in that much pain!??

- “Jenny?” ew

- “we can smell you later” HAHA

- haha I fucking love Tyler “thought experiment”

- “hey, Ty-Ty” “Lucas” I FUCKING LOVE CHAOTIC ELIAS

- oh my god Penelope, stay safe

- PEN PROTECTING TYLER!!! it actually threw him off, you could see his face, it’s the eye contact specifically that threw him off

- oh my god that’s horrifying

- this whole episode is the bau trying to throw Elias of and v/v

- oh god I forgot about emily

- is she about to say that she loved him? pls, I kinda liked them together

- also a lil inconsistency that bugs me; in 15x4, they said that you can never talk down a conspiracy theorist, a targeted individual - they just have to let them believe what they believe - so why is Em trying to convince them so hard, shouldn’t she profile them? idk

- wait I don’t get it, how does the board relate to the team coming?? wouldn’t they have booby trapped it either way? why does Luke dancing in a towel after his shower have anything to do with it??😂

- omg Luke

- OMG dave this is so smart

- Jade’s gonna do something isn’t she??

- I KNEW IT

- when is pen going to cry? im so unsure what kirsten’s insta post was about bc the ep is almost over

- “discretion is the better part of valor” - interesting

- wait are we getting profilers back?? now that she has more money

- Penelope’s house!!

- but also no more greencia pls

- pen and luke pls?? pls? pls. :(

- wuoh elias…

GREAT SEASON!!! but we deserved garvez

looking forward to 2026, when I can do these again :)

more to come as I reflect on the season, but thanks for sticking w me as I did these reactions!!

[njwinterquartz]

I’m gonna make some loosely based predictions or possibilities for next season. I’m not expecting anything to actually happen or any details to be right. It’s just some ideas I’ve had or things I want to see.

(Gerrard is the most straight forward so this part mostly focuses on what the hell i think they could be using him for.) Obviously we know Gerrard is going to be terrible. But like there’s a lot of ways they can go. I think he might try and make them turn on each other, but I really doubt that’d work

We got the still from Tim of Ortiz and Gerrard so definitely a connection there, god I hope whatever plan that woman has backfires because you don’t have to ignore your pain but lashing out in this way has to lead to consequences for her. But this means he might target Hen again with more pointed bigotry and racism because Ortiz might of had a hand in bringing him back. So he might be out for her specifically. Which I’d hate but I wouldn’t put it past him.

Chim and Ravi he’ll obviously be racist and rude towards but the details I don’t really know. Well chim he’ll probably make the cleaning boy again after what Chim said to him at the ceremony. But Ravi being the newest of the bunch from A shift he might haze and treat like a probie and just discredit everything Ravi does.

Buck and Eddie are the interesting ones here. For Buck it’s Tommy. Like they’ve already established a connection between Tommy and Gerrard. So I think Gerrard will be rude and homophobic towards Buck because he’s dating Tommy. I could see him trying to make Buck doubt he knows Tommy and that’ll have Buck and Tommy really sit down and talk about each other and who they are. But I doubt that’ll be anything major because I doubt Buck would let Gerrard make him doubt Tommy.

Also with Buck being the only white man in their group with Bobby being gone, he’s kinda in that spot Tommy was in in the begins episodes. Buck won’t put up with Gerard’s racism and bigotry but still there’s a parallel there.

Eddie I think will be interesting to see the direction they take with him losing Chris for a bit and also him trying to figure out who he is outside of being a firefighter and a parent. And I think Ryan has already talked about Gerrard a bit in connection to where Eddie is at the end of the season. Something about Gerrard kinda being like the man Eddie was raised to be in a way, no emotions macho man, obviously minus the racism and bigotry. So that’ll be something I look forward to them exploring. Like I mean figuring it what Ryan meant not Eddie and Gerrard interacting.

I don’t really know where they’re gonna go with the councilwoman Ortiz plot line so I’m not going to make any guesses on that. And Eddie, I think it’ll be rough for him but I do think this storyline will end with him finally figuring out who he is when he is alone. And Bobby and Athena obviously need a new home, but I can’t predict anything for them it’s just too open. But please give Athena plot lines that don’t center around her being a cop, the season finale was way more than I was comfortable with.

Now on to some happier things I want to see.

I want more Buck and Tommy conversations, dates, and things showing how they’re growing as people and as a couple. And I don’t know why but I’d love to see them go on a date and go stargazing. Like I dunno that would be stupidly cute.

More Mara and Denny, please just more of them. I love how they’re portrayed.

On that train of thought, I want more Henren family time with Mara. I also kinda want to see if Jee will be a part of the Denny, Mara dynamic now that the Hans (Chim and Maddie) are fostering her. More madney and Henren interactions too, I adored how Karen and maddie are being shown with the hen and chim dynamic.

Obviously more Ravi and different Ravi dynamics shown with the cast.

We’ve gotten a tiny bit of Tommy lore from before the begins episodes. But obviously I want more and more of his dynamics with the others. Gimme more Chim, hen and Tommy.

Also I think it would be good to show Eddie and Tommy’s dynamic again. Especially since Eddie is pretty alone right now. I could see Tommy helping Eddie start the process of figuring out who you are. Not saying this as in Eddie realizing he’s not straight, but like figuring out who you are outside of your job, past, and family. With their shared military background I think Tommy could help Eddie with that.

There’s a lot more thoughts to this but my brain is bad at explaining them so this is what I’ve got. Wish I could do more on the predictions and possibilities like more than just what a terrible person Gerrard is going to be. But that’s all way too up in the air for me to make any cohesive thoughts and predictions on.

[legally-allowed-to-slime]

i disagree on the "it was a good kill and Gem is bothered by it/pretends she's not" bc it really wasn't,,, and Gem can be right in calling it pathetic and also not expecting it/knowing how to escape and also be not that bothered by it bc she does try to like, let (red life) people kill her the entire session, she's 'not a sweat' as she calls it

Mumbo literally lost a life bc he was going after Gem in the car (he pours lava where she was specifically), then tried to lava her twice, Grain had to tell him to keep going after her with a sword (also Skizz tries to lava her before that too lmao) and she still escaped it to the point Mumbo logs out bc hes embarrassed (in a light hearted way ofc) just to log back in, join in on Martyn helping them (Gem does just accept him digging a hole under her, doesn't move at all, she only tries to escape the lava) just for Ren to steal the kill like the little yellow life shit he is and then Mumbo tries to lava her again lmao. it is pathetic, let's not kid ourselves here, Looney Tunes type crap, especially with the speed. It's a good kill on Ren side ig??? idk

like. idk, people try too hard to make it seem like she's bothered or not, maybe the answer is simply that she accepts dying, but she also wanted the killer to actually try to get her (like Grian does, he clearly hates the cheap kills,,, unless it comes from his teammates lmao)

feel like ppl try too hard to make her look like Scott (and I don't think even Scott is that bothered, he just switches to survival mode for once lol), when both her and Joel are fine with ppl trying to murder them and succeeding, they show it multiple times this session

i don't think this makes her "untouchable" or boring either, bc I don't think any life series member takes death as seriously as fanon makes it seem sometimes (might be the dsmp brain wiring lmao, but to me it does matter how a person reacts to their death and what they do afterwards, and she goes back there and just. Tries to congratulate Mumbo until she realizes Ren did it. She doesn't hide, doesn't get annoyed or anything, so I don't see why would I take it as her lying to herself or the viewers. Taking her at face value is smarter here, bc she doesn't hide her feelings, she's open about being annoyed at Pearl/Imp, she's open about disliking ppl and how she feels about stuff). they know they're in a death game, know what to expect so it's whatever as long as theyre still green and have lives to waste

i know it's all in good fun and role-play, but I just wanted to give my opinion from somebody who's not that into this side of the fandom (this is also messy as fuck and i probably repeated myself a bunch but im too lazy to fix this, whateeverr)

i’d like to preface this with a disclaimer: gem is one of my favourites. i would never speak so derogatorily about a character if i did not obsessively watch all their povs and consume so much fanfic about them that i’m sick. put simply, c!gem is morally grey, and i’m entirely comfortable with it. moving on

i feel like we need to face the fact that every lifer is an unreliable narrator. yes, some to a greater extent than others, like how dl!pearl or sl!lizzie are clearly unreliable. but all of them, bar none, say and go through things that affect their worldview. an unfortunate phenomenon known popularly as “the human experience”. especially in the life series, when the ccs are deliberately roleplaying, it would be naive to take any of them at face value, especially when evidence says otherwise.

so yes, gem is definitely bothered. she talks about how she’s a target, even puts a target on her skin, and keeps on talking about how incompetent everyone is (even when they’re not trying to kill her). i don’t think this is unreasonable of her at all, i’m just pointing out an incongruence in her words and her behaviour. again, there’s nothing wrong with being bothered, but what’s really interesting is that she constantly says things like “oh, finally!” or “that was so bad” or just laughs. to me, i interpret it as her purposely trying to keep up the image that she isn’t bothered, that she is confident or that wow, look, the other players are so bad she’s getting frustrated that she can’t die. a “regular” lifer would probably just exclaim oh no if there was a failed attempt on their lives, but gem is much more deliberate with her words. i’m not calling her calculating, but maybe i am.

(i have noted before that gem is impressively good at faking real emotion, so that definitely plays a factor in my interpretation. it’s very easy to dismiss it as genuine exasperation, but based off her other words you can slightly discern that it’s a facade. obviously gem is gunning for a win this season, and if she’s gunning for a win, why would she try or want to die?)

as for the kill. directly before this, yes, it was a cartoon chase scene, but gem was in full survival mode and was darting around, constantly eating. it would be foolish to pretend that she wasn’t trying to stay alive.

you argue that she allowed martyn to dig the hole under her. i went back to check, and due to the sped up game, it took martyn a little over 2 seconds to dig the 2x2x3 hole. 2 things can be true: gem is good at the game, and the hole caught gem off guard. furthermore, gem was looking at grian and not at martyn when the hole was dug. so she’s in the hole, and she has less than one second to react before the lava is placed. gem pulls out her water bucket very quickly, and places it down the same second. too late. she’s caught by the lava, she yells, she takes out her shovel to dig, she digs one block and then dies. so how long does the kill take?

eight seconds. from the first block being broken to gem dying to the lava, it takes eight seconds. that is the opposite of pathetic. that is a well-executed kill and even with gem’s condescending “good job!” it doesn’t take away from the fact that it was well done. note that gem reacted very quickly, so it wasn’t gem “allowing” herself to be killed. she tried pretty hard to not die, but the lava was just faster. in no way did she accept dying when even in her own video it’s clear that she fought to the end.

gem is definitely not fine with people murdering her. the other attempts, yes they were bad, but gem also tries to dodge them. i feel like she legitimately forgot about tango’s trap and stood on it by accident, but changed her story when tango failed anyway, because she doesn’t even say anything to tango (like a cheeky “tango i’m standing here”) prior to the actual attempt. i wouldn’t go so far as to call her a sweat, but to go to the other extreme that she allowed people to kill her is also straight up inaccurate, even if gem acts like she did.

so, we’ve established that it’s a good kill. how does gem react? she tells the audience “oh it’s pathetic”, goes up to mumbo and tells him “mumbo i’m so proud of you”. that is textbook condescending. she’s trying to act amused, as if mumbo’s a toddler that’s just done a cool trick. (never mind that it was ren, it’s the intention behind her words) if she got outwardly annoyed, that would make it obvious that she was actually threatened by the kill, or that she was actually bothered. this faux nonchalance is what i’m trying to point out here. i don’t think she’s inwardly annoyed either. i just think she’s lying to herself.

as for that last bit, i don’t think i ever said this made gem boring. to me this makes her incredibly interesting and an incredibly complex character to dissect. i’m saying those who just believe whatever she says and believe that whatever she says is what she actually believes are making out her character to be more boring than it is.

[stardustdiiving]

Got tagged by @/kanonavi! 20 fanfic writer questions thing

1. How many fics do you have on AO3?

UMMM. I think around 13 probably. I anon or orphan a lot of old stuff

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

32.2k words…probably at least an extra 10k in orphaned stuff though

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Its been solely genshin since 2022. Usually something needs to be a primary tier fandom hyperfixation for me to even think about writing fanfic for it , and then even then I rarely finish more than 1-3 fics for it. Genshin broke this streak bc something shifted in my brain and I’ve finished around a dozen things for it somehow

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1) source of inspiration (genshin — makoto, ei, wanderer character study) — 541 kudos

2) better days (genshin — zhongli & xiao erosion fic) — 254 kudos

3) Pattern Recognition (genshin — wanderer & Nahida sickfic) — 254 kudos

4) are you happy? (genshin — postcanon wanderer & nahida) — 142 kudos

5) marvel fic I wrote when I was 15 — 97 kudos

The 1st and 3rd most kudoed fics were actually the first genshin fic I wrote + the first and only bnha fic I wrote when I was 16 but they don’t count because they’re like my disowned children who I should probably orphan but don’t in case I want the option to delete them? I feel they were made before I really processed how to characterize the characters n what sector of fanon I wanted to contribute to, so they’re really like, generic fandom tropey to me and vastly different compared to how I usually write in a way I find kind of unbearable. I am really deliberate in my art n writing in trying to appeal to my own specific n niche fandom tastes so to help me find a similar crowd of people to hang out with and am usually pretty successful in nailing the niche. But for these fics it feels I not only didn’t try to target my own tastes I somehow managed to write something I feel only people who like the fanon I actively don’t vibe with would like ?!? I have no idea how that happened!

it would be if I somehow managed to write a hat radish fic that had “maternal Nahida and her edgy teen son Wanderer” written all over the characterization as if this is not fanon I actively dislike and a lot of how I write hat radish is often motivated by me trying to fulfill my own preferences because I find them in conflict with a lot of fic I read about them? JSDJDNDJ. Itd be like. Where did that come from. How was this written by me. Its one thing to not like my work but how do I have a finished thing I fundamentally disagree with on all grounds that make up my interest in why I may want to write fic about a certain thing in the first place. Disowned child moment

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

YEAH always even if I’m slow too. This is an extension of my habit with my art I usually always respond to every comment on my work I get even if it just feels like me repeating thank you over and over bc i like to acknowledge people who r interested in what I’m doing as much as possible to convey I appreciate it. I think it’s always helped in building a sense of community/connection w ppl which is what I’m more interested in as opposed to quantity of interactions

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Idk why this keeps happening but at least half my fics fall under “bittersweet” to “hurt no comfort” territory because I . Hmm. love character study that invokes complicated or ambiguous emotions. I think that’s the trend here

Id probably nominate someone to watch me die?. Its a xiaoven fic that was born out of me being interested portraying a xiaoven dynamic that felt at least somewhat believable characterization wise but pitched studying how venti & xiao’s deep rooted issues could clash with each other in a relationship in a way that’s rlly accidental and tragic when put with their feasible compatibility n care for each other. I have it on anon bc I have weirdly mixed feelings for it bc it feels like a xiaoven fic that probably appeals to any faction of xiao or venti fan who isn’t big on xv far more than a xv shipper

But idk how to advertise it as that bc it’s not like that audience would be in the xv tag?? and it’s specifically romantic xv so it categorically should be there. But it being in the tag feels weirdly hostile to me. I guess I feel it comes off as a fic that exists to be kinda contrarian and hostile to most ppls enjoyment of xiaoven but that wasn’t my intention :( it was made out of my own enjoyment of xiaoven….i just process romance weirdly and I think am more down with ship fic where the ship is kinda depressingly dysfunctional more than other ppl may be. I like the fic quite a bit but I just don’t feel it has a place to Go fandom environment wise

7. What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I HAVE. no idea I feel like no fic I have up leaves off with emotions that are meant to be solely happy. The closest I get is bittersweet . Um. The scripted end of pattern recognition would take this spot but it like. Doesn’t exist yet (but it will…soon…..w)

8. Do you get hate on fics?

HM. I don’t think I ever have. Probably in part I don’t write enough for it

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Look at this shrimp 🦐

10. Do you write crossovers? If so, what's the craziest one you've ever written?

I actually love fandom crossovers as indulgent thinking exercises but I usually never get indulgent enough to write fic about it. However I did write a 30k Steven universe gravity falls crossover where the GF characters were SU gems in 2 months when I was 12 and I have no idea how I did that but it was crazy. Thats still the longest thing I’ve written . It was so much

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Nah

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Someone translated a fan comic of mine I made when I was 13 a few times but never a fanfic iirc

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Surprisingly no!

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

I do shipping in such a weird specific way. My go to answer for this is bakudeku bnha but I kind of lose all feeling for a hyperfixation after it ends most of the time so I don’t really…actively like it…sort of….but it’s also a vague ride or die thing to me…it’s complicated… the fandom environment for it is so unrecognizable to me since I was into bnha idk how to talk to people about it anymore particularly the new generation of fans. I don’t really like actively Ship them in a fandom way but fictional romantic relationships that r very influential to me are Pearlrose Steven universe and Anthy/Utena from rgu

15. What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I mainly just want to finish pattern recognition and I think I will. Ummm. Usually if I don’t finish something it’s bc I just lost interest in seeing it finished

16. What are your writing strengths?

I think people usually like my characterization especially in terms of like, exploring or pitching certain aspects/interpretations of a characterization . Like I feel people usually respond specifically with like “wow interesting characterization. Im adding that to my system of beliefs” this applies to both funny headcanons and more serious character portrayals.

I feel I’m also usually decent at atmosphere and invoking more visceral emotions when needed especially when the emotions in question are like. Mental Illness Monologues (tm) or jarring panic/fear/discomfort idk

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I. struggle. SO bad with like. Organizing how to execute all the thoughts I want conveyed in writing, especially the order of hie things should flow. If I want to hit on multiple traits of a characterization I’m doing for ex I have a hard time figuring out how to order it into a cohesive thing. This is kicking my ass with my oc comic story rn

I also have a hard time with subtlety & trusting my writing to speak for itself. I usually have very detailed thoughts on what I want to communicate and have to do a lot of shifting around to find a balance of feeling things are conveyed clearly enough to be caught onto and interpreted but not overexplained. Its not even a matter of feeling I need to dumb stuff down it feels more like me trying to write emotional analysis of writing I find interesting before doing the writing that would be Fun To Analyze. This is kind of the torture labyrinth when usually all I want to write is emotional subtlety and naunce

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Idk my usual rule is I don’t like when it feels forced. I feel I see it used with ship pet names a lot but as someone who doesn’t get the appeal of pet names conceptually it’s often almost a dealbreaker for me in fics if it feels forced in to be cute , and is not something I can realistically imagine character A doing for character B. Like it just wigs me out. I have no idea why I get such a strong reaction out of it

But I’m really on board when it feels like people pulling from their own experiences with being bilingual or sharing a similar background with the character. When it feels intuitive I rock it as fleshing out the character’s background and people really understanding the societal background and environment the characters exist in

19. First fandom you wrote for?

I have no idea actually omg. Especially in terms of what was first published

20. Favorite fic you've written?

Idk I don’t really enjoy my writing? Often when i finish a piece of writing I am usually satisfied I’ve executed an idea or communicated The Things but I’m not actively happy or proud of anything. Its like talking to me. I talk for myself and based off I want to say but overwhelmingly talking is for communicating with Other People so once it leaves my brain my experience with its existence ends and now it’s all about other people’s experience. This somehow does not apply to my visual artwork where part of the motivation to create it involves how my experience with it continues after its completion

Ummm. I guess my intuitive answer to the question is Pattern Recognition in the sense I feels it Conveys The Most I want to convey about a subject. But it’s also like the fic I cant stand to read the most and doing so is usually an ocd trigger too. Its complicated. I very much write for myself and my own interests and i never force myself to do so but having favorites or enjoying my work just feels incompatible with my brain somehow. And somehow this does not discourage me from writing at all

[darlin-djarin]

Its during season 2 when Din and Boba ask for Bo Katans help to rescue Grogu. She spends most of the scene being quite racist towards Boba Fett specifically targeting him because he is a clone.

Saying he's a disgrace to his armour, that he shouldnt be considered a Mandalorian, and calls his father "his donor" and says shes heard his voice thousands of times and thats why shes being hateful about his existence.

Its very uncomfortable to watch because shes white, being racist to a character played by a Maori man. But his helmet is on during he scene to make it look less racist.

Maybe its because im indigenous too, but the racism in that scene stood out a lot and it upsets me the show refuses to acknowledge it. (Id recommend a scene rewatch its really jarring to see compared to how they portray her this season)

oh oh my god

thank you for telling me, that scene went right past me. bo-katan’s racism is so… yikes. i know there’s general racism towards clones by a lot of people but the fact that bo-katan outwardly expressed it right to BOBA FETT’S FACE.

honestly tcw bo-katan seemed much more likeable just because her hatred and rage made her an interesting character. no hate to katee but live action bo-katan is so dulled down and her getting a THIRD CHANCE at the darksaber is getting so fucking boring like. just bc she’s a woman doesn’t erase her blatant racism and terrorism. ik it’s fun to joke about “god forbid women do anything” but like real talk here, bo-katan (in the live action at least) is getting more and more unlikeable. i don’t want to see any more of her. i’ve seen a lot of people saying that they hope she dies and frankly it’d do her better if she did. make her go out doing something honorable in parallel to her horrible past.

handing the show to bo-katan is such an awful take. i try to avoid controversy in the fandom but giving the “princess” role to a white woman who’s very much racist and has also expressed her hatred towards followers of the creed (calling din’s covert a cult when miss maam was literally part of the death watch) is so UGHH. like i love women but get this clown out of here. i tried liking her, i did. i actually really liked her in the clone wars and her characterization there was so interesting but putting her into the live action and doing her dirty just feels so wrong.

i’m sorry that scene was so jarring for you. i’m indigenous as well so i understand how you must feel about it. i’ll probably rewatch it soon just to remember what happened.

taking away the spotlight from a man of color just to give it to a racist white woman who’s lost the ONE thing giving her importance twice and then giving it back to her for a third time is just. like respectfully, i don’t think ANYONE wanted to see that. and people who are like “it’s good that din gets to be a side character! bo-katan deserves to be the princess she is!” are literally lying to themselves. favroni is systematically giving us bad content so our standards are lowered and we celebrate the smallest things even if they’re terrible. bo-katan being a princess is a boring idea and taking away din’s development into WHY he doesn’t want the saber is just bad storytelling.

i have so much more to talk about but i just KNOW people are gonna get mad 💀 sorry to hate on your fav but she is a racist white woman who plays no importance unless she has an object that she’s lost 2 times before.

[utilitycaster]

also like, the cast approves the official art right? the official artist does not just make changes however they please

so i understand it not being up to your taste or whatever but this is how the cast wanted it to be, so being rude to the official artist accomplishes absolutely nothing

So here’s the thing: it’s totally fine to not like the cast's decisions! I think a lot of the weirdness I feel exists and talk about frequently is that there’s this unevenness and inconsistency in who you can criticize and the content of that criticism. Like, the main reason why ship discourse is so fucking fraught is because no one ever says “I wanted these two characters to kiss and then they didn’t and I’m sad.” It has to be “This guy’s story was clearly building up to a roaring rampage of revenge and this player was clearly avoiding their backstory and was obviously burnt out on the character and this character was clearly being infantilized in the ship I didn’t like and convenient, isn’t it how almost all of this is in the passive voice and I’m not actually coming out and saying I personally simply wasn’t happy with the choices the cast made?”

What’s also super telling is that I keep seeing the exact term “yassified” with regards to Fearne (and to a lesser extent Imogen). First off, whenever I see a very specific turn of phrase repeatedly it’s always a bit of a sign of like…does the person posting this actually feel this way in their individual thoughts or are they just parroting others. But what’s far more interesting is that Friederichs has outright said she fell somewhat short of Ashley’s intentions with regards to Fearne in the initial art, and was able to better grasp the uncanny and too-bright nature of the character now that she's seen the character in action for much longer.

It’s not really about what the cast wants. It’s literally as basic as “they changed it and I don’t like change.” And to be clear that’s very human and understandable. Before going back for my grad degree I worked in a tech role that bridged the gap between developers and end users, and people will lose their shit over minor cosmetic changes in software, let me tell you - but it’s also not rational, and it doesn’t need to be justified. A big part of life is realizing that brains are to an extent wired to be sensitive to changes in their environment, but if it’s a harmless change, it’s often beneficial to take a deep breath and let it sit for a while before knee-jerk deciding you hate it.

But I think my biggest gripe is that like, we’ve just seen the immensely swollen heads unofficial fan artists get about their work. We’ve seen people come up with truly bananacrackers faux social justice reasons to defend every hack who thinks they’re making a ~*statement*~ by drawing Imogen wearing the same exact style of glasses as twenty other people. We’ve even seen unofficial fan artists claim that their ability to make work that people will pay for is in fact evidence of their validity and contributions compared to others in the fandom. And then the second a fan artist actually gets paid by the production because they liked her art enough to hire her, it’s open season, apparently.

Personally? I strongly suspect the reason why the art of female characters in the cast gets the most criticism is because the weird refusal of many fans to be normal and say ‘hey I don’t love their choice in roleplay here’ means there’s just gallons of simmering toxic resentment about the women in the cast and their characters and choices below the surface, and somehow the official artists (who have also all been women) are considered an acceptable target for this bile.

There are also people I respect who aren’t loving the art! I think that’s a completely reasonable response. But they’re not making up a zillion reasons why actually they are correct, or yapping about it in highly visible places! It's fine to dislike it - just admit this is a personal preference with nothing deep behind it and keep it out of the tags! Like, part of why I’m so fucking wild about this relatively minor thing is when I (and others) have made untagged “I’m not a fan of this choice” posts I’ve gotten a barrage of anons thinking it’s time to change my mind and how dare you the cast likes it but for the official art it’s suddenly totally cool to be a huge fucking asshole in public.

[clairethecutepup]

Don't Worry about YOUR "Place" in a Fandom...

Okay, I’m still not checking messages nor posting currently, that shall resume on Friday. I just popped in again to share this message because it may be something someone needs to hear ASAP.

—-----

Fandoms: the perfect opportunity to engage with other fans of something, and share your work or see theirs. Heck, they’re even the perfect place to make some new friends and get feedback on improving your abilities, should you be a content creator. However, they can also be the perfect place for discouragement or even, in the more toxic ones, harassment. It’s, unfortunately, the proverbial “double edged sword” that comes with a community of fans for something: you can either find yourself a well-renowned or at least welcomed individual, or you can find yourself overlooked or full-on attacked as one of the “black sheep.”

Sometimes, it can be more of an issue with the fandom itself. Billie Bust Up’s has an issue with policing fan-produced content– to the point where actual kids/minors will get mobbed –and I’ve seen them go as far as accusing “pedophilia” or “homophobia,” on the claims of fighting “proshipping” or “erasure.” Then, we have the infamous Steven Universe incident of a minor feeling inclined to take her own life, as the fanbase decided her “fatphobic” over a fanart piece that drew Rose Quartz “skinnier than she’s supposed to be.” I don’t think I need to say anything else they’ve done to emphasize “issues with the fandom itself,” but be assured that the suicide attempt failed and that user is still alive.

Other times of the “double edged sword,” and I hate to say it, but the “issue��� is actually you: it not being a “toxic” fanbase of unreasonable members in these specific cases, but you and your actions being why you find yourself in a disfavorable position. You may behave in a way that no one finds “attractive” nor “appealing,” like if you have a tendency to act out or constantly “sympathy-reel” for attention– yourself or what you make. Believe me, it’ll often be more your behavior than your actual work that’ll earn the ire of more reasonable fandom members: the only time the more reasonable will hate you over pictures or writing, is when you’re actually using your talents to attack others (ex: “hate art”) or if you’re using everyone’s favorite characters for… sinister purposes (ex: actual grooming material).

Even if you don’t make such content, but normal content meant to be enjoyed by fellow fans, you can still feel some manner of grief within your community from it. Sometimes, it can be more direct: the bullies of the fandom finding your work/style “offensive” enough to attack, or the rabid fans of some bigger fandom member claiming “idea stealing” and otherwise. Clearly, they don’t fall under the “reasonable members” umbrella…

Other times, your content can result in your misery more indirectly: the realization that there’s nothing “special” about what you make or offer, especially easier in a smaller fandom of less “competition” (for lack of a better word). Before you start crying that I’m being mean, recall that “special” doesn’t specifically mean “good” nor “enjoyable”: it’s a term referring to uniquity, something that would really grab others’ interest and attention– something they couldn’t come across anywhere else. I mean, why focus on all these gray rocks on the road, when I can look at this shiny, rainbow-painted one? So yeah, your offered content just might not be “special” enough to earn a majority of attention, sorry to say. 

What’s that: “Why bother anymore then, if no one else likes me or what I make…?” Umm… Did you forget why you joined a fandom and made content of that franchise in the first place?? It’s because you loved the series it’s based on, right? Why should others determine whether you continue making content or continue consuming whatever the official people behind it make? What’s that: “What’s the point of sharing, if the target audience wouldn’t want anything to do with it or me?”

Look, even if an entire fandom somehow turned against you, blocked you, whatever, you can still post things! No matter how small, you’re bound to still have some fellow fans who would love what you make. What about the people who aren’t part of the fandom? Heck, even people who generally don’t like the franchise in question may like what you, specifically, have done with it! Don’t get a swollen head, now, even if they may like your take on a character in fanfiction better or prefer your artstyle to the actual show’s/game’s/etc’s.

Just… You are in an age where people can finally share whatever they want to make, why are you letting yourself waste the opportunity because people are unreasonably cruel or you’re not some “big name”? Stop worrying about whatever “place” you may have in your fandom, and just create and share! Don’t hold yourself back from making great things, because of something that’s really just superficial in the long run… 

[cogentranting]

Avatar 2 spoilery thoughts (aka a collection of mini rants): 

the ONLY thing interesting they allowed Neytiri to do was her scene with Spider in the climax (and it’s the most interesting moment in the movie) and there was no follow up to it. Hopefully they follow through on the tense relationship between Spider and Neytiri in the third movie. 

In the middle of the big battle at the end the sea Na’vi are just gone? Where did they go? Why did they leave? The battle wasn’t over and they just... went home? I don’t understand. Even the chief and his wife left and their daughter was still there! They came explicitly to rescue her and then left without her. What is this? 

Spider grew up alongside Jake and Neytiri’s kids, was practically raised by them, but they just keep leaving him behind and forgetting he exists! I get it for Neytiri because it’s explicitly part of her arc that she doesn’t accept him and only sees him as an outsider, but for Jake? Spider is captured by the enemy and Jake just leaves him with no intention of ever going back for him. And even Kiri who I think is supposed to be in love with him (or if not, is closer to him than anyone else) seemed mildly sad that they left him behind but not really concerned. Honestly, I thought it was gonna cause Spider to switch sides and I wouldn’t have blamed him (although it would have made me sad, and I’m glad he didn’t)

Do you think Spider TOLD them that he saved his dad? Or is that gonna be an awkward conversation in movie 3? 

The decision to leave their tribe and go join the Water people actually doesn’t make sense. Yes, Evil Military Guy was targeting their family specifically, but that wasn’t really bringing MORE trouble to their people because they were already actively at war with the humans. The humans want to destroy them, Jake being there doesn’t really change that. Jake’s arc was (kinda) about him deciding that running doesn’t solve anything and he needs to stand and fight so that would have worked except that at the end they DON’T go decide to go back home?? Which is incomprehensible to me. They’re like “we’re sea people now” and I just don’t feel like they are? It would make more sense if they went back but had now forged this alliance with the sea people. 

They kept taking Tuk places and I don’t know why they did that. She’s like SEVEN stop taking her dangerous places! She keeps almost dying! 

Actually ANY time the kids went someplace by themselves at least one of them almost died. They should not be allowed to go anywhere unsupervised. I know part of Jake’s arc was something like learning to trust his kids but he absolutely should not, they will all die. 

I think they’re suggesting that Kiri was like... conceived by the spirit of the planet or something like that and I think that’s dumb and I found her annoying. 

Why can Lo’ak speak whale? 

The bad guys are all so cartoonishly evil. It’s not just they’re willing to do the blatantly evil thing, it’s that they don’t even have a justification for it. They’re not going “actually it’s okay because...” they’re just like “yes I am murdering people groups for their resources. This is evil but I am doing that and I would like you to know that.” And all these random soldiers are totally okay with just murdering literal children. Not even ONE has some hesitation there? 

The marine biologist is making snarky comments to the whaler when the whale attacks as if he wasn’t fully complicit in what they were doing. I’m glad he died too. presumably. 

But actually the whale absolutely WRECKING the whaling ship was so much fun. Good for him. (he doesn’t have a voice actor so I can’t look up his name on IMDB so I have no idea what it is). 

It continues the long movie tradition of bullying that is actually low-key attempted murder. 

Seriously they should have just let Neytiri and Kate Winslet’s character go nuts and murder some military guys. 

[ufonaut]

JSA 2022 #1 THOUGHTS

KYLE KNIGHT. K Y L E KNIGHT. KYLE KNIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!

i literally can’t even tell you how much i love the villain legacies i love all out violence and i love the youngsters (sorry craddock) carrying on the original jsa’s legacy of being trained conflict escalators with each other

i adore selina being her usual complete hypocrite self and claiming that bruce giving her a second chance is completely different from helena giving this generation’s jsa members a second chance. something i’ve actually really enjoyed about modern portrayals of helena wayne (in batman/catwoman 2020 too) is that it seems to be sort of universally understood that helena is her father’s daughter more than anything else and she’ll always be at odds with selina, it’s interesting given that in the original incarnation of helena it’s precisely her mother’s death that gets her to put on the cape & cowl in the first place whereas modern takes always have bruce dying first. i’m all for it, it’s compelling and geoff blends nicely the asc 1976 canon (regarding the why & how of bruce’s death) with what little of helena wayne we know in the present day!

alan featuring in the flashbacks more than any other jsa member is, of course, catering to me specifically thank you geoff thank you for calling alan the main character of the universe in one of your recent interviews

per degaton is expected but used in new and exciting ways, he’s really shaping up to be the jsa’s best longtime adversary and i spy a lot of roy thomas era all-star squadron inspo going into his portrayal

alan looking younger than everybody else in the 18 years from now panel. younger than even dick grayson. is literally killing me i’m in genuine hysterics. the starheart working overtime

VLADIMIR & RUBY SOKOV FOR MOST CHARACTERS OF ALL TIME JUST GENERALLY IMMEDIATELY ON SIGHT NON NEGOTIABLE

vlad taught his daughter love and violence and nothing else. more than alan ever did. i look forward to the vlad/alan content me and the boys on /co/ have been predicting

mikel janin’s art is wonderful and wonderfully expressive, jerry ordway as a guest artist means the world to me (i’d argue his is the definitive jsa). we’ve got it all

THE FLASHPOINT BEYOND/WATCHMEN SNOWGLOBE AS THE CATALYST FOR HELENA’S TIME TRAVEL ADVENTURE SCREAMING AND CHEERING

JOHNNY THUNDER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i’m buying three different variants of this issue and they’re all worth it because i’ve never read anything so beautiful in my entire life and the next issue taking place in the 1940s is once again meant for a target audience of me. god bless

wait i’m still going insane over KYLE THEO TEDDY KNIGHT. the fact that he inherits everything from his mother’s side is making me insane in the brain i can’t even imagine what jack must be feeling good god this is the book. THE book.

i fully believe that by the end of the series/first arc this new gen of jsaers will be saved

it does everything, and i mean everything, a first issue is supposed to do. i’m not even kidding this is flawless impeccable writing to me

IN CONCLUSION: EATING IT WITH A FORK AND KNIFE

[wench-and-jezebel]

NCIS Reaction: Hung Out to Dry

Wench (@scripted-downfall) reacts [with (maybe) occasional asides by Jezebel (@typicalopposite)]

This is starting right after the last episode, so there’s no introductory conversation, alas.  Instead, the space in between reactions was filled with Jezebel ignoring me and then insisting I send her the link to the show despite it being RIGHT THE FRICK NEXT TO THE LAST EPISODE.  Hmph.  Problematic one.

Sir is both an asshole and manipulative

[Welp.  That’s a mood killer.]  Ma’am was in the neighborhood and thought she’d invade my reaction, I see.  [That.  Was not to you.  But actually kinda works.]

Oof.  Sir leaves the door unlocked but has no phone.  Unreachable except when he isn't, I see alkdsj

What are the chances he wasn’t already dead and that’s why his chute didn’t open?

"My dad's gonna kill me"  Welp.  Bit dark given the circumstances, but go off  [☠️☠️☠️☠️]

Logan, please.  Wait, shit: *Tony, please

“It was a death rattle”  “You ever hear a death rattle?”  “I was using it as a trope.”  Dude, you’re a tool.

I mean… dead dude = pinata.  Checks out to me, Ducky

Guess the groan might rule out my already-dead hypothesis, but idk if I trust this kid’s judgement

"Why didn't he pull it" BECAUSE HE WAS DEAD

She's still needing to be told to put on gloves alskdjf

Tony and the frivolous photographs.  Max wouldn't take that kinda shit without bitching and you know it (but I love it, so, and I don’t care abt Max’s judgement anyway, so.)

THOSE BOOTS LOOK AWESOME; I'M JEALOUS

Tony, focus.

Tony is not focusing

"It's his anniversary"  "Which marriage"  Anniversary of a death, maybe?  Dead wife?

Oh dammit.  So much for that^.

Tony continues to not focus and I appreciate this

"We don't stop for casualties in war.  Nor do we in training" that's stupid [☠️☠️☠️☠️ military *sigh*  This is a spin off of Jag btw.]  Ah, I see.  [iirc Gibbs was in an ep of jag and people liked him so much he got his own show…. That’s still running] Damn

"I'm not calling my boss.  I'm calling yours"  Well, damn.

"Thumper" like the bunny rabbit? aslkdfj

IT IS THUMPER LIKE THE BUNNY RABBIT

“Was he dead when you reached him?”  NO HE WAS DEAD IN THE AIR; GUARANTEEEEEE  (I’m gonna cry if this is wrong; I’m so convinced about it at this point)

"Obviously his reaction time was too slow" or maybe he was DEAD

I spy with my little eye a scene from the intro

Dammit.  FINE, okay, guess he wasn’t dead when he fell.  Hmph.  Rude. (*cries*)

Okay, Tony and Abby and their art conversation are, at once, my beloveds

��Double your pleasure”  “Double your fun”  Please.  PLEASE.  These two are hilarious together

Poor Tony, stuck being the audience scapegoat since someone had to ask about opioids and obviously he’s stuck in that role 

Um.  An acid?  That’s.  That’s so specific.

Tony, why are you fiddling with the parachutes?  Someone’s gotta re-rig that now alksdfj

Oof, not the criminal recor- I’M SORRY, SHOPLIFTING AND DRUG POSSESSION??? THOSE ARE NOT REALLY THE MOST GATEWAY CRIMES TO MURDER

Okay, hair still isn’t regulation, and lab coats aren’t supposed to be open, but I appreciate the other PPE.  CSI doesn’t even use goggles most of the time.

I continue to love Abby

NOT TONY STILL HARPING ON THE ELECTRICAL TOOLS

Gibbs is still an ass, and the Alec-coded character continues to suffer the brunt of it.  But Jezebel has said that there’s an even more Max-coded character later, which will be.  Interesting.

Wait, I’m sorry.  Excuse me.  Nine of the sixteen chutes were sabotaged.  They’re randomly handed out.  The entire point of this information is that — unless more is learned — no one specific person was being targeted.  So saying “this person had a grudge against the dude who happened to die” is so illogical because they just spent the last five minutes pointing out repeatedly that it was a random chute assignment!?!??!  AHHHHH

Abby picking on Tony feels more affectionate, ngl.  I don’t hate it

Oh, no, not the epithelial analysis alksdfj

– – –

Did I forget the midpoint reaction again?  Mebbe.  But that’s a good sign because clearly I was just.  So absorbed.

ANYWAY.  Still enjoying it!  I’m kinda annoyed by the whole, you know, pick-on-Tony brigade (not as much with Abby because it feels like banter not picking, and those are different, but it still is a bit.  Hmm.) but otherwise, not bad!  I don’t know enough about the show to say if I like this episode better or worse than the pilot, but I’ll get more of a sense of that as the season progresses.  Abby, my beloved.  Alec Tony, my vaguely-idiot beloved.  (Yes, I am seeing him as an extension of Alec; what of it!?)

On we go.

– – –

“For every legal firewall, there is a way around it”  That’s not concerning at all

Not Tony knowing where Gibbs was going with the horse analogy; how many times you used that one, bud?

Y’all, please, this is twice now (once in the title, once in a quote) that y’all used “hung”.  It’s hangeddddd

“Scuttlebutt”  Tony, I appreciate you

Tony, stop rambling about Gibbs’ wife.  Ex-wife.  Whatever.

Can we please stop making Tony an idiot; this wasn’t in his character in episode 1 and it’s rude [Oooof. You. You may be in for an unpleasant surprise]  *sigh* Look.  As I said.  I’m viewing him as Alec 2.0.  I still like Alec better, but.  Yeah.  So I’m unhappy with this development

Poor kid (not sarcastic)

Being nice to the kid = way to ingratiate yourself with the grieving widow, I see

I, too, would ruin my outfit right before a funeral because I wanted to climb trees.  (I did that once, actually.  Went to a wedding wearing high heels and managed to strip the fabric off the heel because of how much running around playing tag I was doing.  I was a teenager.)

Not a bad salute, to my knowledge

Oh, no.  Tony, please be safe.

"Research for Abby"  Is that what they're calling it these days?

“How did you get into NCIS?”  Rude.

Y'all, I'm begging you.  If you have long hair.  TIE IT BACK.  Speaking as someone who has worked in an actual lab, this is killing me.

... Sergeant Nutt, huh?

THE SCUTTLEBUTT RETURNS

Y’all, please.  Once again.  Stop.  Acting.  Like this was targeted.  To “Thumper.”  The chutes were randomly assigned.

Leave Tony aloneeeeee

Poor Tony.  (They didn’t leave him alone.)  [Alas they typically don’t]

I am once again begging y’all to consider that this was a RANDOM ACT OF SABOTAGE

“With Gibbs you never know”  Yeah, buddy’s a bit enigmatic.

Cocaine = Motive!  Except!  Once again!  Apparently!  It!  Was!  Random!

Not the Significant Looks

Oh, no.  I thought the “Oh, no.  Tony, please be safe.” jump was bad enough.  This is.  Worse.

I'm sure it'll be made clear but how dare y'all stick him with a broken reserveeeee

NO THIS IS ACTUALLY HILARIOUS  “No, 4’s unlucky in China”  “We’re not in China”

I’m vaguely annoyed that the drug possession apparently was the gateway crime to murder.  You couldn’t have given the guy an assault charge or something?  That feels a bit more in line with murder.

Did.  Did Tony just fall out of the plane.

I guess he's having a good time doing it, but.  sir.   This is not what I meant by "please be safe"

This kid is adorable, and I appreciate Gibbs helping with the treehouse.

THAT’S A WRAP!

– – – 

This episode may or may not have aggravated me.  A lot.  It would have been soooo easy to just leave off the whole “the chutes were given out randomly” bit if they wanted it to be targeted.  Or, if it were supposed to be random, then have one of the riggers be pissed for mistreatment from the whole unit, so it didn’t really matter who got sabotaged.  But now, there’s this glaring writing illogic that is.  Bugging me.

I still love Abby in all things.  Tony’s characterization feels iffy compared to last episode, but whatever; I still, currently, am okay with it.  Gibbs continues to be a bit of an ass.  Kate and he continue to be… complicated.  I like Ducky, but he wasn’t in that one much.

Still enjoying, though, so we’ll see what it’s like when the first episodes’ jitters work out!

[shinozaki-ayumi]

Ok you know what, I’m think I’m gonna elaborate actually since people expressed interest. Specifically about this part:

TLDR; I sincerely believe that Morishige was NOT a necrophile or interested in dead bodies/gore prior to Heavenly Host. I’ve honestly seen no convincing evidence for him being into that stuff beforehand.

If you ask me, Sachiko took a liking to Morishige because he was emotionally vulnerable and therefore easy to manipulate, not because he already liked gore. He was already quite insecure and took to the sidelines a lot (see the scene in chapter 5 where he insists to Mayu that he couldn’t take a lead role in the play despite his talents/knowledge, also how he took the iconic photo of Class 2-9 together and isn’t featured.) It really seems like taking pictures was what helped him feel connected to people even if he was on the sideline; we see him sitting by himself flipping through his photo album on his phone in the Missing Footage OVA; cats, plants, Mayu. Incredibly innocent, beautiful things. Photography was like his social lifeline; it had nothing to do with gore or violence.

Heavenly Host/Sachiko perverted this innocent source of comfort into something disgusting. She literally targets people’s comforts and takes them away — Yuka and Satoshi consistently get separated, Naomi was manipulated to kill Seiko and can’t save her in any timeline, Yui is crippled by injuries and can’t be there for her students for 99% of the story. These all target their specific weaknesses by taking away their “lifelines.” By extension, Morishige’s source of comfort was twisted into something he could no longer find real comfort in. It’s framed like an addiction. “Just one more look” so he can convince himself that someone else is suffering more than him, someone else is lonelier than him (…right?)

I honestly was never a huge Morishige fan but I do find him interesting to analyze. I think it’s kind of boring and reductive to his character to insinuate that he was already into gore and that’s why Sachiko targeted him so hard. He and Kizami are also foils in my opinion, with the latter pushing him to be paranoid about his sanity/morality even further. I don’t think they’re actually “cut from the same cloth,” or at least weren’t prior to HH, which is what makes them really compelling foils.

I’ve been here for over 10 years but it honestly wasn’t until maybe the past year(?) that it became somewhat common to see people implying that he was always into gore. Which is so… interesting? Strange? Idk. It’s been intriguing to watch. And maybe a little annoying lol.

Anyway this was a spur of the moment “rant” typed on my phone so it may be slightly incoherent. But there’s my thoughts. s

im ngl i think some people project a little too hard onto morishige lately and it’s getting kinda weird lol

[copperbadge]

ADHD & Resources

ayantiel

I can absolutely recommend watching "the neuroanatomy of ADHD" by Russel Barkley, you can find the entire thing on youtube and I found it very informative in both explaining common issues and where they come from, and also giving direction in how to address those or where to start looking for coping mechanisms

Oh, thanks for the recc! Readers, part one is here. I’ll check it out! (Probably while doing something else with my hands. :D)

froofie

I do not have ADHD, but you mentioning needing something MENTAL to do when focusing on like meetings, etc...reminded me that I have ALWAYS, AUTOMATICALLY done the person speaking's hair in my head. I have zero interest in becoming a hairdresser. But my brain will brush hair or straighten hair or shave someone's face. It's very soothing actually.  This isn't to suggest that you do this, but I am reminded that it's something I just....do.

It’s a fun idea though. A lot of times if I don’t have to be on video I’ll do cross-stitch or assemble very simple "microblock” toys (my parents gave me this set as a gift a while ago). If I have to be on video usually I’m either leading the meeting or taking notes, and taking notes does a pretty good job of keeping me paying attention. I’m never sure if I’m supposed to allow as much digression as I do when I’m leading a meeting, but usually the meeting is like me and three people at work I really like, so. A five minute digression into childrearing (they all have kids at different ages so it’s helpful for them to compare notes) isn’t gonna kill anyone. 

wandererriha

Mood. I have employed about all the life hacks I can manage. I refer to it as “stacking dominos” in that I am setting things up for Future!Riha to knock down later. This includes things like a laundry triage system that takes place at the hamper, packing lunch and prepping breakfast the night before, to making my own diy blister pack of supplements for the week.

Oh, I do the laundry triage and the make-your-own-pill pack too! I use a pillbox -- it’s hard to find a bit because it’s Japanese, but the Container Store makes a similar one that I’m loving for travel.

I never thought about meal prep as an ADHD thing but I suppose the massive stack of identically-sized tupperwares that used to populate my fridge when I worked outside the house should have been a clue. 

shamelesslymkp

hey! my dad also got diagnosed with ADHD later in life, and I'm not sure if he'd already started doing this or started later, but what he does in meetings etc. is origami, which is kind of a mix between a body and brain fidget. the reason I bring it up - I know you do origami! - is because of the reactions he's gotten - if you doodle in meetings, people get annoyed. because he does origami and gives them to people, everyone thinks it's just a super cool quirk!

Oh that’s a good one! I used to do origami in part because I was a receptionist and it was something to do when nobody needed me (which was often). I’ve only got two or three “figures” memorized but if I memorized a few more I bet that would work pretty well.  

froggybangbang

Dunno if she's been recced to you but catieosaurus has good stuff about papers on adhd on youtube.

Oh good to know! I’ll check her out. Though I do find it a bit funny that ADHD makes watching youtube rather difficult and yet that seems to be where all the resources are. At least they’re not instructional.... 

I do absolutely understand why so much is on YouTube, because talking to a camera is significantly easier than writing up a document with diagrams and such, but good lord I hate video instructionals. 

killerzebras

Could you link to the resources people suggested, or maybe point to the posts where the suggestions were made? I don't have my shit together anywhere near as well as you do and I'm always looking for things that might help.

I’ve added links to a couple of new reccs above, and also I was recommended “How To ADHD” (specifically I was watching this one about Target). I was recommended a number of books but most of them I can’t find in a quick jaunt through my history, so The Smart But Scattered Guide To Success is the only one I can link. I haven’t read it because it looked like it answered a question I already answered for myself a while ago but it comes highly recommended. 

If you have the time/ability, I’d look through comments and reblogs-with-notes on my posts in the “Sam Has ADHD” tag. There are definitely other resources recommended there in various places but also just the comments in general may be helpful. GOOD LUCK!