#I wish platonic love was taken more seriously

[skelliko]

kazutora hanemiya |°- is it platonic or romantic?

|°- Baji and chifuyu tried to convince kazu that he's actually in love (good timeline)

normally kazutora wouldn't be the one to get so confused over his feelings about another, normally he'd be seeking the opportunity to be able to feel 'love' and the comfort that's supposed to come with it. but right now this feeling that he's getting is the most prominent and confusing feeling he's ever gotten.

this feeling has grown to be more than uncomfortable, it's tightening around his throat so much that he needs to wrap his hand around the base of his neck, feeling his pulse thumping through the thin layer of skin that's in-between the gap of his collar bones. his stomach feels like an empty cave that holds a singular spider making pointless webs that won't be able to catch anything, and his chest seems to always feel some sort of anguishing heat that could also be mistaken for coldness.

he's not in love. is he? if this is the feeling that people get when they start to like someone then he wishes to erase every form of a sappy, love bullshit. this doesn't feel romantic at all, its agonising.

your perfume fills his nostrils but you're no where near by, it's just him alone almost unable to sit through this aching tightness. it's gotten so bad that he feels like he needs to throw up in order to banish this painful feeling. but he's not going to purge, that'd be an obscure decision to make for himself. but him sitting up on his bed with trembling hands makes it seem that maybe its not a bad attempt.

you're his friend, nothing more. sure he feels like he can listen to you forever while finding your rambling cute. and sure he always feels the need to playfully hold your hand which then causes some laughter about the odd movements you both do. and when you both take unexpected pictures here and there of each other; hes always looking back at the photos he's taken of you longer than a minute whilst smiling at them, seeing your captured smile makes him smile. but there's nothing wrong with thinking or feeling that way about a friend, right? yeah, there's nothing wrong with that.

but the thought of you being with someone else puts his stomach through a repetitive feeling of falling, it's as if kazutora is in a constant state of being pushed off a high ledge. you being with someone else spikes his anxiety high and the need of being with you is always there to distract you from any other potential takers that could snatch you up, take, and keep you away from kazu.

---

it wasn't until after a week of this bullshitting that kazutora ended up talking about this odd feeling about you to Baji and chifuyu. chifuyu certainly had the most fun with this little discussion out of the three of them whereas Baji took it a tad bit more seriously knowing that kazutora's feelings shouldn't be taken as a joke.

kazu yapping his heart out about you, mentioning how he feels this and that with you, how it pains him when you're pained and he'd do anything to keep you safe and secure. but also how he feels empty on the inside when thinking about you, how he wishes that time could just stop when your both having a wholesome, heart melting moment because he's afraid that someone will rip kazutora's hand away from your grasp and replace him making neither of your eyes to ever meet again.

"seems like you love her" chifuyu spoke up, he held a little smile and rested his jaw on his palm almost as if he was fascinated when listening to kazu talk about his 'best friend'

"I don't though! I'm just attached to her- or something like that" immediately protesting against the comment whilst waving his hand around at 'whatevet' but opened his mouth again after a second "I think..."

"you think?" chifuyu pestered in hopes of getting kazutora to think more clearly. it's clear that he's yet to understand what he feels right now.

even though Baji became lost in the middle of kazutora's rant cause he kept on going back and forth from feeling happy about you to then feeling almost anguished; the question that was asked next certainly hit kazutora where it pained him the most.

"oi, if you can't tell if it's platonic or more, picture her at her wedding that isn't yours. are you happy for her or do you wish to be the one marrying her?" (idea isnt mine, i got this from a video)

chifuyu looked over at Baji but then immediately moved his eyes over at kazutora to see his reaction "ohhh good one!"

"that's stupid. marriage is a big thing y'know" kazu rolled his eyes over to the side but deep down he was thinking

you at a wedding? he couldn't help but grow angry at the thought of you being off the market for romance. he grew nauseous and sick at just the thought of you being latched onto another person that's not him but he wasn't gonna show that. he doesn't want you to be with someone else but that doesn't mean he wants to date you either, he just wants you all to himself... which thinking back at that now makes it sound really selfish of him. is he even actually capable of romance?

he began to fiddle with the folds of his trousers by his knee whilst sat down on the carpet floor in Baji's room. taking hold of a fold with his pointer finger and thumb and rubbing the fabric together creating some very subtle vibrations against his finger tips as it forcebly brushes against itself. kazutora stayed silent.

"soooo you gonna answer?" - chifuyu

kazu didn't even look up at him, he didn't look up at all since his eyes were just down at this fingers fiddling with his trousers. on the outside he may seem distracted but on the inside he was very much deep in thought, he kept going back and forth on how to verbalise this feeling to then wanting to just shut down, leave and not talk about you or to anyone at all.

but what if the time that he's here, you've already found someone new to talk to, you'll cast Kazutora away and hell never see you again... once that thought popped up he stopped fiddling and it was only then that he made a decision.

"i want her forever. i could love her if it'll mean she stays with me" though as he said this it didn't seem like he was all too happy about it, but he also didn't seem upset by it either. it was as if kazutora found a solution but that said solution seemed to be the only way even tho he hoped there to be more.

"you don't seem too happy about that" baji raising a singular brow

"cause I want to love her but I feel like I'll be unable to"- kazu

"but you just said that you'd love her..." chifuyu mentioned, then silence filled the room for a breif moment, kazutora opened his mouth to speak but before he could make a sound something clicked in Chifuyu's brain "wait don't tell me you're emotionally unavailable! that'd make so much sense but also make things more harder to understand"

"hah?" beyond confused as to what chifuyu is talking about here

"no ignore him tora" Chifuyu looked over at Baji a little offended at the disagreement "you just need a big push, it's clear you want her but i think your not allowing yourself to. your in denial"

"I'm not in 'denial' I know what I feel" kazu protesting even though that's far from the truth,

"and that is?" -baji

silence filled the room again. neither of them have any actual experience with the feeling of love in terms of romance but yet they managed to put kazutora in a corner. because although he's the one who's the closest in getting with or has talked to a girl that makes him flutter; he's the only one who can't understand the feeling of 'love'. it's as if his feelings are behind a blurred window whereas for everyone else it's clear, no matter how hard he squints his eyes to try and see what's behind the window, theres always a possibility that he may think wrongly about the feelings and mix this current feeling for something else. hence why he can't tell if this 'love' is platonic or romantic.

chifuyu broke the silence with a question "would you date her?" to which kazutora responded with a pained and stressed "I don't know" any more of this and he might just get agitated from the amount of strain he has with his emotions

"okay wait let's start off simple" chifuyu waving his hands in front of him to switch up the question. Baji looked over at him a little confused on what he's gonna do or ask but after a few questions in, he understood clearly what game chifuyu is playing.

asking him some basic questions such as, "would you hold her hand?" to which kazu said how you both already do. "would you kiss her?" and with almost no hesitation kazu replied with a yes. "would you text her every day and night?" maybe? it depends "would you tell her that you love her? lets start with platonicly" yes. "would you do something sexual with her" if she's comfortable.

before either chifuyu or Baji could ask another question in hopes of kazu being able to open his mind more, kazutora spoke up and cut their next question off.

these questions went back and forth and over time kazutora knew what Chifuyu was doing, and although some questions seemed to be a little hard to answer at first, he felt almost relieved to answer them because over time he managed to link everything up and be able to unblur the window from before. he finally understood... kinda.

"I'd date her..." but even with saying this out loud it still made his stomach turn, something still wasn't right which made him feel as if something was wrong with what he just claimed, or maybe theres something wrong with him. but he didn't verbalise this feeling.

both Baji and chifuyu smiled at kauz's little statement about wanting to date you, they even exclaimed a few words here and there as if they were proud of him for being able to realise that he generally wants you.

"but I think I'll wait for her to do the first move" kazutora's smile died down a little from before and after stating this their 'little' celebration also died down

"oh c'mon! you went through all this just to not come forward to her?" - chifuyu

"that makes sense" Baji nodding his head but then froze for a second when a thought came up "but what if she never does?" this definitely didn't cause kazu to become relieved, it caused the opposite.

'shit' he thought. there's always that being a possibility. if you never end up making a move on taking the friendship further into it being romantic then he'll never be able to express himself the way he wishes to, he won't be able to cuddle you close to the point where it seems as if your soles would conjoin, he won't be able to feel his face being plastered with your sweet kisses, and he certainly won't be able to call you his.

why is 'love' so frustrating?

"I think you should make your move" Baji suggested making chifuyu to nod his head in agreement. but it only caused kazu to let out a sigh, tired? frustrated? feeling nauseous again? it's all three at the same time.

he knows he can't keep up with this any longer, if for one day he feels fine with you but then the next he feels like he needs to be put in a mental asylum; it'll eventually cause him to break completely, and that's far from what he wants for himself. and then again, what if you love him but only platonicly? even if kazutora secretly is still unsure what he feels, he knows that if you were to make the first move hell agree to whatever words you spew out if it means that you both will get together and be able to do all those comforting, romantic activities.

he buried his face in his hands and mumbled a few curse words to himself which caused Chifuyu and Baji to share an almost apologetic look. "hey, don't beat yourself up! were thinking of the worst case here but what if she's feeling the same way as you" chifuyu spoke up trying to ease some sort of pain, Baji pitched in too "I reckon shes feeling the same way you are"

"forget it, I'll get over her at some point" kazu lifting his head up from his hands and repositioning himself comfortably on the floor. it's like his whole demeanor changed from being all beat up to just brushing it off with a 'whatever' but we all know this is just a facade and he'll eventually break again, hes not that strong in terms of being able to contain his emotions.

 ♡---

as of currently, he's given up on the topic and there's nothing that could make him re-continue the subject. but one day, he'll get his senses knocked back on alert and his eyes will glisten with hearts because his mind had decided that he's sick and tired of this longing feeling which will lead to him confess about his emotions and feelings towards you. it could be months, weeks, days, or of the strain that he has is too much right now it could even be a few hours, but who knows.

if there's one thing that's for sure though, it's that kazutora truly does love her but he's just unfamiliar with the feeling and due to that it's making him freak out. it's like putting a rain forest lizard in a desert and expecting it to immediately adapt, the sudden change in temperature and environment will cause the lizard to be put under too much stress and soon enough it'll flake away into the oblivion. maybe not the best example to use in terms of the end but the beginning is definitely on point.

[anonymousewrites]

Nature of the Human Soul (Book 1) Chapter Twelve

Platonic! Hazbin Hotel x Teen! Reader

Father Figure! Alastor x Teen! Reader

Chapter Twelve: Preparing for Battle

Summary: The Hotel trains to fight angels, and (Y/N) goes on a shopping trip with Rosie and Alastor.

            (Y/N) spun the spear around in their hands, letting themself feel the balance. They felt at home with it, ready to defend their friends against the angels that would be arriving tomorrow to try to destroy their souls. Narrowing their eyes, (Y/N) let their briars take the weapon from them. They refused to let the exorcists win. (Y/N) had trained as hard as they could for this—the fight to have an afterlife, to have an existence, to have a family.

            “Well, it seems everyone is coming along nicely,” said Rosie, overseeing her cannibals with approval. She herself would be leaving before the battle to protect more of her people in case the exorcists came for Cannibal Town at all, but she was there to help at the hotel for now.

            “Do you think we have a fighting chance?” said (Y/N), glancing at her.

            “Oh, yes,” said Rosie, grinning sharply. “If anyone can tear these angels apart, it is this group.”

            (Y/N) stood a little taller at that. “I’m ready to fight.”

            Rosie patted them on the shoulder. “Of course you are, sweetheart]! However…” Rosie raised a brow and looked at (Y/N)’s overalls. “Are you sure you wish to go into battle in that?”

            “My clothes?” asked (Y/N) in confusion.

            “Sweetheart, you’re about to be in the greatest fight or your life and afterlife,” said Rosie. “I just know that upstart Vox will be filming everything, and, of course, if you’re going to fight, you should look good doing it.” She pulled (Y/N) to her side. “We’re getting you new clothes.”

            “Is now really the time?” said (Y/N), looking around at everyone training.

            “Certainly,” said Rosie. “Come along, sweetheart. If we’re going into battle, we do it in style! Right, Alastor?”

            He was instantly by his (best and only) friend’s side. “It wouldn’t be a good show without style.”

            “I can’t believe you haven’t taken (Y/N) to our tailor yet,” tsked Rosie as she, (Y/N), and Alastor walked into the city.

            (Y/N) liked walking between them. Alastor was…interesting (intimidating), but they didn’t really mind him, and Rosie was possibly the nicest and warmest woman (Y/N) had ever met. Going shopping was a strange turn of events given the circumstances, but (Y/N) wasn’t opposed since they felt comfortable in their own skin with people for the first time in their life. They were going to explore who they were—clothes, magic, and all.

l

            “Here we are!” said Rosie, guiding (Y/N) into a tailor shop. “This is the perfect place for new clothes. Alastor and I have been patrons of this shop since we arrived in Hell, haven’t we?”

            (Y/N) could have told them that. When they had walked in with the two overlords, the other customers had run out in fear, and the workers had immediately stood at the ready to assist them. Luckily, several seemed pleased to have the clientele, so not every experience with Rosie or Alastor had been bad. Unsurprisingly, they could be classy when going about their business.

            “Of course. They have a classier style than some of the modern…attire—” Alastor spoke as if he was calling it trash “—you find around these parts.”

            “It looks expensive,” said (Y/N), looking around at the lovely outfits, yes, but also well-made (which mean they cost money).

            “Auntie Rosie is treating you,” said Rosie proudly. “And if I don’t want to cover everything, I’ll just ask Alastor.” She winked. As his best friend, she could get away with that.

            (Y/N) smiled. “Alright.”

            “Then let’s begin!” Rosie became businesslike. As an Overlord and talented businesswoman, she took presentation seriously, and she was not about to let (Y/N)’s new, made-in-Hell clothes be anything less than excellent. “Alastor, what colors are we thinking?”

            “Red, of course,” said Alastor.

            Rosie nodded approvingly. “Bold, hellish, and it will harmonize with our outfits.”

            (Y/N) had a (pleasant) feeling that they were going to be going around with Rosie and Alastor far more often.

            “Can we get their measurements?” said Alastor, looking at a worker. It was not a request.

            The tailor walked up with his measuring tape, and (Y/N) frowned, stepping back.

            “I, uh, I don’t like to be touched,” said (Y/N), crossing their arms in an instinctive attempt to self-soothe.

            Rosie’s gaze softened. “Would you be comfortable with me doing your measurements, sweetheart?”

            (Y/N) looked at Rosie and gazed into her eyes. For a moment, they didn’t speak. Then, they nodded. (Y/N) would take a chance and trust Rosie—warm and comforting Rosie. They were sure she had her dark side—she was a cannibalistic overlord, after all—but (Y/N) didn’t really care about that. Other parts of who people were felt more important to them. Like Rosie being kind to them. Rosie being respectful.

            “Thank you, sweetheart,” said Rosie, taking the measuring tape from the worker. “Now, just stand still.” She stepped closer and held the measuring tape across (Y/N)’s shoulders, beginning the measurements. “Alastor, what are your opinions on style? (Y/N), your opinions are valid, too. Speak up if you have any ideas.”

            “I don’t like modern clothes,” said Alastor. “I think the style should be more timeless instead of cheap and temporarily ‘trendy’.”

            (Y/N) would have nodded in agreement, but Rosie was measuring their neck, so they decided to speak. “I want to feel put-together. Like I’m strong and I’m here to stay. I don’t want to be overlooked or considered a weak kid who has no idea what they’re doing, anymore.”

            Rosie and Alastor’s grins sharpened. As (Y/N) spoke, they grew more impassioned, their hidden feelings and thoughts that had undoubtedly led to the incident that sent them to Hell coming through. Rosie and Alastor respected that fire.

            “Oh, don’t worry,” said Alastor. “No one is going to say my protégé is weak if I have a say in it.”

            “Sweetheart, it’s time for you to really show Hell and Heaven who you are,” said Rosie, cupping (Y/N)’s cheek.

            “Now, smile!” said Alastor. “No matter what outfit you wear, you’re never fully dressed without one.”

            (Y/N) grinned.

l

            “Where the hell were you?” said Vaggie, hands on her hips when (Y/N) and Alastor returned to the hotel (Rosie had headed back to Cannibal Town).

            “Shopping,” said Alastor, his shadows holding up the bags.

            “You went shopping at a time like this?” said Vaggie.

            “I can’t let my protégé go into battle wearing those,” said Alastor, gesturing to (Y/N)’s overalls.

            (Y/N) shrugged and looked at Vaggie. “Rosie insisted.”

            Vaggie sighed. “Alright, alright. Come on, Charlie has a speech.”

            “Very Charlie-like,” said (Y/N), laughing and walking over to the gathering crowd.

            “Alastor, (Y/N), you’re back! Great timing!” said Charlie, not questioning their absence for a moment. “Hey, uh, Alastor, could I borrow your microphone again? I want to make sure everyone can hear me.” Alastor tossed the microphone to her, and Charlie grinned. “Thank you!” She walked on stage and looked out over the crowd.

            “I want to thank everyone for coming,” she began, smiling out at her people. “Even people who aren’t staying here yet…Cherri.”

            “Look, I can’t resist a fight, okay?” said Cherri, grinning. “Especially when I get to tag team with this fuckhead.” She hugged Angel.

            Charlie smiled and addressed the crowd at large again. “Tomorrow, the exorcist angels will face a Hell ready to defend itself and win!”

            “Yeah! Yeah, we will, tell ‘em baby!” cheered Vaggie.

            (Y/N) grinned. They were ready to fight for their home.

            “Yes! And we are-we are going to win!” declared Charlie. She coughed. “But, in case we don’t…I want you all to know that getting to know you has been the biggest honor of my life. Whatever redemption really means…I know you all tried. I have seen the good in all of you.”

            (Y/N) wasn’t too sure about going to Heaven if they were alright with killing sinners’ souls for sport, but they couldn’t help a smile at Charlie’s words. Becoming a better person was good.

            “And it’s…I’m just…I love you all so much,” said Charlie. “And…and live tonight however you want because—”

            “We’re all going to die!” Niffty cackled excitedly.

            Everyone stared at her.

            “Alright, let’s give it up for not dying!” said Vaggie, attempting to salvage the situation. “Love not dying.” She coughed. “Drinks?”

            That was an idea everyone could get behind.

l

            (Y/N) held their drink and smiled at the family they’d found. They were in Hell, yes, punished just like the…people on Earth had always told them they’d be. But they were happy. They were living how they wanted, and no one was judging them. They were accepted. In Hell, in the Hazbin Hotel, (Y/N) was home.

            “I mean, personally, I’m excited. It’s been a long time since I’ve stabbed someone and really meant it, you know what I mean?” said Vaggie, and the group laughed.

            “I’m excited to get to really see what I can do with my magic, really go all out, you know?” said (Y/N) excitedly, the roses on their head doubling and blooming wide.

            “Cheers, bitches!” said Cherri.

            “Yeah,” laughed Husk.

            “Here’s to us,” said Angel, clinking his glass with Husk’s.

            “Here’s to being alive today and not dying tomorrow!” declared Pentious.

            Everyone cheered and raised their glasses together—a family coming together.

            Above them, Alastor leaned on the banister of the stairs and regarded them from afar. “Ah, the celebratory night before a courageous last stand. It’s been a surprising thrill to witness these wayward souls find connection.” He leaned his head on his hand. “Almost makes one sentimental, eh, Niffty?”

            “I really like them, Alastor,” said Niffty. “They let me put on roach puppet shows without booing!”

            Alastor chuckled. “Ah, an enjoyable collective.”

            Niffty nodded vigorously. “(Y/N) even made me a stage and set!”

            Alastor’s familiarly manipulative grin morphed to a far different smile. His eyes landed on (Y/N) below. “I admit one could get accustomed.” However, as much as (Y/N) was Alastor’s protégé, he refused to think of anything else. Vulnerability would only get him into trouble. Alastor refused to lose any chance he had at power and freedom to sentiment. He couldn’t afford to.

            (Y/N) noticed him and waved.

            Alastor couldn’t help but smile slightly wider in response.

Taglist:

@kyalov

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@boredwithlifeatthispoint

@jaytheaceenby

@paastaboi

@bettybabys

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[lostyesterday]

I wish that Voyager had taken more time to explore Kes’s dynamic with the rest of the main characters other than the few she had developed relationships with. I do love her canon relationships with the Doctor and especially with Tuvok. Her relationship with Neelix I’m not such a huge fan of, although they do have some moments I like. I wish their relationship had always been platonic. And technically there’s her relationship with Tom, but that was never well-developed and any interest for me was negated by the love triangle. But there are so few scenes of Kes interacting with the rest of the crew.

The few scenes of Janeway and Kes interacting are really sweet. I love how much the two of them clearly trust each other and how Janeway takes Kes’s perspective seriously and greatly respects her. But there are so few scenes of the two of them that thinking about their relationship requires filling in so many blanks.

The characters I most wish had a developed relationship with Kes are B’Elanna and Harry. From what I remember, neither of them interacts with Kes to any significant extent, which is such a shame. I think Kes is exactly the sort of person early-Voyager B’Elanna could use as a friend – someone deeply kind and open-minded and curious about the world and other people. Kes could have brought out B’Elanna’s own drive toward curiosity and discovery – a drive that is so clearly there, but that it often seems she forces herself to rein in. Meanwhile, it’s clear to me that Kes and Harry should have been besties. In early Voyager, Harry and Kes are the two characters who most recently and suddenly left their childhood homes behind potentially permanently – Kes willingly and Harry unwillingly. They are different in many ways, but they both approach others with kindness and the future with optimism. Their dynamic could have been really interesting.

I also think that, while the Doctor and Tuvok function more as mentors toward Kes than equal friends, Harry and B’Elanna could have been Kes’s peers in a way – relating to her life and her perspective rather than teaching her new things. Even Neelix sometimes functioned as a teacher toward Kes. I wish that all of Kes’s major relationships didn’t feel so unbalanced. It’s not that I have a negative opinion of mentor relationships at all (like I said, I love Tuvok and Kes’s relationship so much), I just would have liked to see different types of relationships explored for Kes too.

[ssparksflyy]

BELLS' 500 FOLLOWER + BIRTHDAY EVENT ! ✷༉‧₊˚.

HEYYY POOKIE SHMOOKS THANK YOU SOSO MUCH FOR 500 FOLLOWERSSS ♡ i seriously appreciate every single one of you, you keep me motivated and i thank you for allowing me to post my silly little posts and for supporting me sm :) i meant to do this event when i reached 400 followers.. but when i reached it, a lot of people were announcing events so i decided to wait a bit so they could get the attention they deserved :) now with 500 (nd my birthday coming up) i decided to finally do this event as a way to get me up a running again after the break i took :D i hope you enjoy this event and once again , thank you so much !! ily !!!

CERAMIC UNICORNS —

ill make you a moodboard based off your blog, a character, a ship, anything you'd like !!

CMON BLONDIE ! —

(moots only !) where we would go on a friendly date ♡

FLOATING LANTERNS —

ill write you a short blurb (romantic or platonic) for whoever u wish

FLYNN RIDER EUGENE FITZHERBERT —

(moots only !) what duo do i think we are most like ?

FRYING PAN —

ill assign you a random poster from the many i want to hang in my room >ᴗ<

HERE COMES THE SMOLDER —

ill give you an outfit based on you blog's aesthetic ! (include clothing preferences if u want something a little more specific ♡)

MAGIC HAIR —

ill give u a random animal crossing villager i think ur most like (cause i recently started playing again hehe)

MAXIMUS' APPLES —

ill tell you what taylor swift era u remind me of most !

MOTHER KNOWS BEST —

ill give you a 10 song playlist (on spotify) based on your acc, a character, a ship, whatever you'd like :)

PASCAL'S PALS —

ill assign you a plushie i think best fits you ♡

THE LOST PRINCESS —

ill give you a ts song + lyrics that best fits ur vibe !!

THE SNUGGLY DUCKLING —

i'll tell u what pjo cabin i think ur in !! ( warning: im stupid :) )

JULY 26 —

(moots only!) ill give u a small love letter to send overseas to you while you fight bravely in the war and i stay home with our two children hoping and praying you'll return safely (its just a love letter lmao)

i literally copied my 200 follower event layout which was inspired by @flowers-for-em so credits to my lovely lovely emma !!

i ask that you keep it to 2 requests per ask please :)

this event will be ending august 15 !

i try to complete requests as quickly as possible but i do ask that you remain patient ( this has never been an issue on my blog but i thought id still mention it ♡♡ )

i hope you enjoy !!

ah yes. the tagging of the mutuals. ( in no particular order but lmk if u wanna be added or taken off !! )

@mqshido @riordanness @hope92100 @jgracie @hopelesslyromanticshark

@flowers-for-em @pinkdiorluvr @lastolympus @s1utlvr @brodieland

@over-the-oceancall @sunnitheapollokid @cinemaconrad @chxcolatefrogs @pumpkinbxtch

@kozumesphone @satelitis @stvrlighttgabss @juneberrie @waitingonher

@maybxlle @alexwritingspot @missedyour21st @leovaldezluvr @jvpiterzs

@aezuria @puffoz @mqstermindswift @aryxchse @colettesonpluto @starrynightmovietheatre

[poppitron360]

I’d like to dive deeper into my thoughts on Caleo, bc they have been taking up most of my brainpower rn:

I get where Rick was going with it. I really do. They started off hating each other, Calypso thinking Leo was really annoying and just generally being like “why is this tiny human talking to me?”, but then they grew closer, realised they misunderstood each other, and bonded over common ground. It’s sweet. But the thing is, Rick? You’ve already got a character that did all that with Leo in the previous book!

And his name is Frank.

1. You’ve already set up that dynamic! Why not spend more time focusing on fleshing out that existing arc instead of creating a new one?

2. There’s SO MUCH more potential with angst- Frank being afraid of Leo bc of his fire, Leo being afraid of Frank because he’s twice his size and could easily crush his tiny body under his foot. Leo’s had to learn to survive on his brains and quick-wits in order to protect himself from bullies, and instantly gets defensive when he sees Frank. Frank is very insecure and sensitive, so immediately falls victim to Leo’s jokes. It takes a while for both of them to take those walls down, put aside their differences, and learn to trust each other.

3. It’s just hilarious how got-off-on-the-wrong-foot they were. A reminder that when Frank first met Leo, Leo had just destroyed half of New Rome. They both immediately judged each other completely based on looks- like it’s seriously funny how much you could compare these two to “Pride and Prejudice”. Also, the awkward misunderstanding that was the whole Sammy thing-

4. But they also have a lot more in common that Leo and Calypso ever did- similar trauma with losing their moms, and actually Leo is just as afraid of fire as Frank is. Both are incredibly insecure, and they both feel like they don’t belong among the other Seven.

5. You’ve also got that fun opposites-attract thing- Frank is big and muscular, Leo is built like a twig. Frank is big soft pookie bear, Leo is an absolute menace to society. Frank can turn into animals, Leo is a machines guy. Frank is Roman, Leo is Greek. You get the idea. They were written to juxtapose each other beautifully. They are the Yin to each other’s Yang.

6. They get so much more time together to establish a meaningful relationship. Their arc carries over three books, and we get to form connections as a reader to BOTH Leo AND Frank separately beforehand, so the payoff is a lot more satisfying. It takes time for them to open up to each other, and when they do it feels like they earned it. Calypso and Leo got a couple of chapters, that’s it.

It doesn’t have to be romantic! Leo can heal his trauma with friends and found family, learning to love and accept himself, learning that he doesn’t actually need the attention of a hot girl to be valid. He can find his place among his brethren with the help of all his friends, even Frank- the most unlikely of friends.

I wish Rick had put more effort into fleshing out the platonic relationships instead of just conforming to romance-centric ideals of “love fixes everything!” It’s lazy, and boring, and has been done to death. Platonic friendships make up 95% of our relationships, yet they are SERIOUSLY underrepresented in media. I’m calling for more interesting platonic dynamics. Leo and Frank could’ve been so much more, if Rick had actually taken the time to build on their relationship, and focused less on “Leo Needs a Girlfriend”!

So, when I say “Everything Caleo did, Valzhang could do better”- THAT is what I meant.

Also, Jason is so much better for Leo than Calypso, but that’s a whole other post.

[Edit: And I have made that post! You can find it here]

[dollcherray]

ㅤㅤㅤ𖣂 POISON TREE 𖣂

ᛝྀི Scout & Medic with a reader who attempted.

₊⊹ Notes: Is this self indulgence? yes, i wanted to start again by writing something about what i'm personally going through so i can just try and comfort myself, I'll go back to requests in a bit. Tw: Suicide topics and reader also has depression, reader is gender neutral.

𓏲 ๋࣭  ࣪ ˖ Type: Platonic/romantic, angst/comfort, headcanons.

꩜.ᐟ Song: Poison tree

۶ৎ SCOUT ۶ৎ

𖣂 he's very worried.

𖣂 You two were really close, he knew you were always the kind to not always be optimistic and all... but i don't really think he would actually realize you have depression at first, even if you showed all the obvious signs.

𖣂 Scout only knew when you actually attempted and didn't really go as you expected, the moment that he found out you attempted to take your own life was the final blow for him to actually put the pieces together.

𖣂 and believe me when i say he's worried, for starters: he was one of the firsts to go see you in medic's room, Scout will unknowingly bombard you with questions like, why did you do it? why didn't you talk to him? and etc, but i promise you that he's just very worried and doesn't really know how to deal with things like these.

𖣂 After all this overwhelming worry goes away, reality will finally start to hit him, the fact that you actually tried to kill yourself saddened him to no end, he started to build some kind of guilt in his mind, he thinks that he was such a bad friend for not noticing you felt that way, he honestly thinks that he should've tried to at least check on you.

𖣂 After you get out of the hospital be prepared, this man is going to absolutely check up on you every 5 minutes, always asking if your okay and if you stay in your room for more than 3 hours, Scout will be barging in absolute terror, he does NOT want to have to see you in such deprecating state again.

𖣂 If you ever need to talk, he'll be there, doesn't matter what he's doing, you just slightly cogitate on needing someone and he'll be all up on your face like "what's up, talk to me", while he may not be the best on comforting people on this topic, he'll try his best for you.

𖣂 If you're having one of these times where you don't have any energy for anything, that's okay!!! Scout will try to take care of it if you wish!! if not he can stay by your side while you're having one of these episodes.

𖣂 Overall just really worried about you or your mental health </3

₊⊹ MEDIC

𖣂 Fuck?

𖣂 He's perplexed, just like Scout, comfort is something he's not used to, i mean yeah sure, he's a medic he's dealt with that before, but not with someone that's close to him, that's the difference between him and Scout, and that he absolutely SUCKS at comforting someone, but he's trying at least!!!

𖣂 Obviously he was the first to find you and holy shit he was taken back, its a very panicking scenario to see your closest one to you literally on the bridge of death.

𖣂 When you woke up in his room it was absolutely awkward, because of his lack of experience on events like these he would just be staring at you as if he's trying to figure out what to say.

𖣂 But seriously, Medic actually panicked when he saw you almost dead on your room, this man is already fucked up mentality and that did not help him at all, he even messed up when he went to treat you, almost killing you in the process.

𖣂 Although he's still a medic and he will give you meds for your mental problems if needed, he'll just be oddly quiet about it or just... awkward in general, like i said, comfort must be a real foreign topic for him so he's just trying his best to not say something out of pocket.

𖣂 I think he'll actually try to help you not with words but with acts, with things like doing some chores for you or doing anything you ask, its easier for him to express his support and love for you like this since he's not that specialized with verbal comfort.

𖣂 But if you need to talk or anything, he'll try to push aside this "nervousness" of his and actually try to give you some advice and what not, it may not appear but he is really worried about the events and definitely does not wanna go through that again.

𖣂 Don't even try to hide your emotions from him, Medic will find out eventually, especially since he's totally "alerted" about how you're doing now, so even if you successfully hide what your feeling from him, he'll eventually know you're lying, so don't even.

𖣂 awkward but he tries for you <3

[tea-and-secrets]

I feel horrible about this, but it's escalated to a point where this issue could destroy my life if I don't find a way to stop doing it.

So, for some reason, I get these really intense, obsessive, really disturbing fascinations with people. There's no pattern to them, no specific personality type or anything that sets it off, and I have never had more than one or maybe two per year, although they don't usually last more than a few (3-5) months. They're NOT hyperfixations. I've been hyperfixated on people before. For me, it never lasts more than 2 months (usually FAR less) and is entirely platonic, not at all violent or distressing, and doesn't make me upset in any way. I've had hyperfixations and an obsession at the same time, once I had an obsession and hyperfixated on each of his main friends within a 3 month span rapid fire style.

These obsessive feelings are like. Needing to talk to them, intrusive thoughts about hurting them, wanting to find them IRL (even if they live states away), to show up where they are, to call them at ofd hours, constantly imagining a future together, and they're always very romantic/explicit in nature. They make me feel physically ill from how gross they are. They're like nonstop intrusive thoughts of a relationship, but with this intense desire to constantly act on them and a need to be around the person all the time. And not being close to the person makes the intrusive thoughts worse.

It has never happened with someone I have actual romantic attraction to, but it happens even if I don't know them in person or we never met IRL. Usually after they fade I feel ambivalent or cold or just vaguely normal about the person. So basically after a few months of agony it sorts out and I am free usually for 8-10 months. I've never dated someone I have an obsession with. I understand them enoughto know they wouldn't mimic intrusive thoughts if they were genuinely romantic feelings. Plus, they don't last. They always fade eventually and honestly, they seriously freak me out. I don't want to have murderous intrusive thoughts when someone doesn't pick up a Skype call. That's not my idea of romantic.

Usually, I just wait for these feelings to pass, or limit contact with the person, but this time. It's so much worse.

The person is my friend, and way too young for me. He's not a minor, he's just to young for me (4 years younger, its my personal thing). He's taken, not my type, and I've always seen him as a pesky younger brother of sorts, so I never even considered this would happen. Having these feelings about him makes me feel violently ill. I've tried ignoring him and pushing him away until they stopped, but he noticed and I feel guilty punishing him for a problem that's only in my head. It isn't his fault there's something wrong with me. But I dont know what to do. If I told him about it, I'm worried he might think I like him (I don't think I do, I know how my obsessions are and it isn't love) and based on comments he's made, I'm worried he might actually try to rope me into a polycule or shoot his shot with me. Neither of those would be good places for my mental state.

I also really don't want our other friends to hear about this because I have a crush on one friend who's way older than me (we're both adults but we would NOT have gone to high school together ha ha) and I still want to hold out hope that in a few years she might see me as a viable partner (a bi can dream...) which would be jeopardized if she knew I'm basically a freak of nature.

So I need to figure out how to fix this part of me, FAST. I can't keep doing this and I'm scared things will fall apart or I'll lose it trying to fix this but I'm scared of losing everything.

I wish I could just have been born normal but I wasn't and now I have to fix it. It doesn't feel fair, and I hate it, but I want to be normal and not have to deal with this anymore. I want to just be okay, and I don't know how. I just know that normal people don't do this and this scares me. I don't want to hurt people, I don't want to be like this, and I don't know how to fix it, so I just suffered in silence for years. And now I have to fix it and don't know where to start. I just needed to tell someone about it.

.

[haechanhues]

chapter twenty one : dong sicheng

S I D E : A (written)

word count : 1.2k

Your conscience had never been so guilt ridden in your life. 

You thought you had that in your twenty one years of life, but in retrospect the rest of your life was so clear it was transparent. 

Nothing could have ever gotten to you as much as exploring your attraction together with Dong Sicheng. 

There was not even a confession. 

Barely a kiss. 

Sicheng had wrapped his arm around you, to which you had held onto one of his fingers and you didn’t let go. He only talked to you the whole night and you, him. Mark and Haechan thought he had been someone you knew and reconnected with. 

Chenle, of course….he knew better. He just chose not to say anything, not when you both looked like you were punishing yourselves already and he didn’t want to hurt you even more. Although he didn’t agree with what you were doing, or whom you were doing… You were his friend and he was going to protect you. However, that didn’t mean he would stop calling you a bird brained idiot. Because that’s what you were. His bird brained idiot. 

The first time you and Sicheng kissed, it was something. Something worth exploring and treading through. 

“I’ve always been fond of you,” Sicheng admitted. 

“I know,” You muse back and you kiss and kiss and kiss. 

You and Sicheng went on dates, but you didn’t put the label on it. You called it ‘hang outs’ or ‘meet ups’... Dates? No. You and Sicheng were just friends. Like you and Yangyang. And you and Haechan. You and Mark. Chenle… 

Friends. 

“Don’t be an idiot,” You chided, taking the two ends of the glow stick bracelet from him and fitting it around his wrist. 

“Did you just call me an idiot?” He pushed at your head with his own, “Fuck you too, then.” 

“It’s only the truth,” You laughed, feeling tingly all over your face and at the skin of your interlocked arms. You pretended to look at the view and he didn’t have to pretend he was doing the same.. Because he was looking at you and only at you. 

He smiles, all fond and sweet, smoothing over your eyebrow with his thumb, “It’s golden hour.” 

“I know,” You snort, squinting as the golden ray of sunshine disallows you from watching him without a frown on your face. Missing the smile he has when he looks at you. 

“It makes you look prettier, you know.” 

“Prettier? So I was ugly before?” 

“No,” Winwin says seriously, “Just…prettier.” 

You don’t kiss him. Instead you bring him into an embrace, that feels like something and everything but also nothing at all. It’s hard to explain, but you and Dong Sicheng were never going to have it easy. 

The first time you had sex, it opened up new doors for you both. You were suddenly open about some part of your relationship. You made no effort to hide the fact that you were hanging out on social media. To the people you saw everyday, you were in a relationship but you weren’t serious. Platonic but definitely not. 

Again, it was hard to explain. 

On a particularly hazy night, the two of you were wrapped up together, kissing against the wall of the dimly lit party room. 

Sicheng’s fingers traced your lips with special attention to your bottom lip. Somewhat taken by the plumpness of it. Wishing he could kiss you and worship it. He may be drunk, but he knows beauty when he sees it. He liked the way it was darker and fuller than your upper lip. 

“Win-” You whined. 

“Hm?” He murmured, using his fingers to trace your face. Leaving a wave of sensations in their wake. 

“Do you think-” You swallow harshly, hating yourself for choosing this time as the right time to talk about it, “I still love Hendery.” 

He pauses, his fingers halting in their movements. His dark eyes flicker to meet yours, and to read the messages within your expression, before removing himself all together. Completely sober. 

So sober. 

“So why aren’t you with him?” Sicheng’s eyes have hardened and the boy in front of you is cold. 

“Because… he thinks something’s happening between us,” I answered, pictures of your past conversation with your ex boyfriend getting to him. 

He snorted and raised his eyebrow, “But nothing’s happening.” 

“But there is!” You shout. 

He smiled, albeit disappointed with you for sure. Not liking the way he looks at you, with a look like that..you can’t help but kiss him like you’re punishing him. Setting out to prove that there is something. 

You hold him by his neck as you pull him closer, leading the kiss so much that he’s completely at your mercy. 

The air between you two had frozen over. The tension was still there. But there was nothing fond. Despite the fact that Hendery had aired the both of you, with a ‘well i guess there’s a new couple around.’ 

Despite the guilt, you still kissed every day. You still said your good mornings and your good afternoons. 

Except you were lying when you didn’t have to. 

You argued all the time. Every fight the volumes went up and you were shouting at each other so loudly that the neighbours could hear and were concerned for your safety. 

They started to hate Sicheng, and on one hand you didn’t want them to hate him. But on the other, hating him had cleared your conscience and made it easier. Made the betrayal much easier. 

On a particular night, you had shouted so much and punched a wall, Mark came rushing in to make sure you were alright, followed by Chenle with his phone (just in case) and Haechan, verbal insults at the ready. 

Though they had only found Sicheng with his head in his hands, wishing he were anywhere but there. 

He saw them. The trio, so ready to protect you and he missed his own band of fools. He missed Yeosang, Jun and he missed Hendery most of all. They were the most important people in his life… 

These boys cared for you so much and he missed the people who cared for him in turn. 

Mark had you in a bear hug, whispering words of comfort directly into your ear, Haechan packing your clothes into a bag, making it obvious you had no say in where you were staying for the night….or nights. 

Chenle, assessing your situation for any physical injuries, save for your slightly bruised knuckles, had made his way over to Sicheng. 

“Need a ride?” Chenle said, shaking his phone. 

“Nah,” Sicheng snorted, picking himself from the floor and making his way out the door, the huddle of you and Mark watch as he makes his way across the room quietly, save for the scuffing of his feet across the carpet and the door springing alive to make way for him. 

“You don’t love him, Y/N,” Sicheng’s eyes implore into yours, “You don’t.” 

Your shoulders drop in hurt, but he isn’t saying it to be cruel. He isn’t… The only one who seems to pick up on that is Chenle, because when Haechan’s eyebrows reach all the way up to his head (his defences soaring higher) and Mark’s fist clenches, he notices the way Sicheng eyes you. 

Careful and fond. 

Like always. 

“Take care of her,” Sicheng says to Chenle before he leaves. On his way to grovel to one of his people and to let your people care for you, because it is abundantly clear that he, and Hendery, are no longer yours anymore. 

He cries all the way home. 

And you cry all night, so much so that Yves, Seunghan, Doyoung, Minnie, Yuqi and Johnny are all forced to video call for a last minute sleepover at 3am. All without really talking to each other, but there on call. 

Just until you fall asleep. 

S I D E : B

THE SERIAL LOVER

in which a girl farewells every boy she’s ever loved (or at least had romantic feelings for) in order to prove that her feelings for one particular boy are very real and unwavering. 

chapter twenty one : dong sicheng

masterlist | prev | next

tag list : @matchahyuck @haisuken @dinonuguaegi @replayenthusiast @90s-belladonna @ahnneyong @liliansun

[yorshie]

YOU! *waddles into your inbox and t posts threateningly* I've got a bone to pick with you.

*starts pacing as I proceed to rant* There's a small theme that y'all keep low-key mentioning that I wanted to pick your brain (affectionately) about if that's alright with you.

And that theme is the importance of being soft in special regards to the turtle boys.

I wanted to ask why you think that's important to them? Why is being “soft” considered important? What does it even mean to be soft?

As a lady myself, I've personally always struggled with appreciating and accepting the so called soft parts of myself because I live in a very…intense family where I feel like I have to fight for my voice to be heard. And softness while it isn't necessarily considered a weakness in my home, it isn't exactly a celebrated strength either.

I personally struggle with that because I feel like we need more tenderness in this world. In fact, I will fight hand tooth and nail to defend and encourage the right of others to be soft (especially men) but I feel like that's privilege I can't indulge in because then I would not be taken seriously as an individual and therefore make my argument or statements noid.

So when I read your works about “soft and sweetness being desired” it literally had me stop and think because it was just so surprising me. Like “People want this? People appreciate this?” I was just so intrigued about this line of thought, that I'd very much like to hear your insights in this regard if your up for a physcological anon conversation.

If not, no worries, just know that your work makes me stop and reconsider and I'm very grateful for that! 🧡🙏🏼

Ok. Ok. I'm gonna preemptively tag @desceros and @luckycharms1701 cuz I feel like this ask is aimed at more than just me, but if you guys wanna add your two cents feel free please. Also, I'm gonna stick this underneath a read more tag just cuz it's gonna get long, I can already tell.

first off, I want to say I'm sorry you feel like you wouldn't be taken seriously as a person or judged for being soft. I hope that you can reach a point (if you wish) where you are more comfortable expressing yourself. I agree that we need more tenderness in the world, regardless of the gender of the person expressing it.

Ok, now to delve into "softness" and the turtles especially. I guess I'll start this off by saying a lot of the times when I go on about "soft turtles" or "being soft for them" I don't mean literally. But I do think as humans we are in general soft compared to them. Our skin is softer, we have no shell, no scales, we're a lot more breakable compared to them. We probably feel like little hairy marshmallows to the turtles.

Metaphorically however, is a lot of what I play with when mentioning softness. (Desceros said it perfectly as a metaphor for comfort). But these turtles have had to shun a lot of social interaction. They don't have anyone to really open up to, be that in a platonic fashion or a romantic fashion, and so I personally project a lot of what i desire for them onto them. I want them to have that tenderness, I want them to be able to have someone they can let their guard down around, and so that's why I fixate so much on using my writing to give them that opportunity. They don't get a lot of someone just being nice to them to be nice to them.

It's probably my own love language of being tender to show affection bleeding through as well, but whenever you see my flailing about soft turtles, this is what I mean. I'm just talking about them finally getting to express affection and have it returned, not actually craving something literally "soft". And... well... softness itself is a nice feeling. If you have a really soft blanket, do you like it cuz it's soft? or cuz its comfortable and warm? Kinda just tangles back on itself over and over.

So if I wrote the line about “Raph pressed his beak against your temple, and with a soft sigh you tilted your head upwards to chase the sensation” that’s. So soft. But beyond just being physically soft and tender, there’s the emotional release of leaning against someone (metaphorically or physically) and having them lean back. Having them turn into the comfort. Accepting it.

Yea. That’s what goes through my head. That’s why I’m so obsessed with writing the turtles giving affection and having it received full heartedly. They lead ugly, silent lives. They need a little bit of affection.

[sweet-cuddlebug]

That last headcanos post took me WEEKS to finish, mainly because I'm procrastinating on finishing my character redesigns (13 cards) and at the same time I was doing 10 other things (which I also didn't finish), so... here's something I DID finished

I love these two A NORMAL AMOUNT and I'm definitely not projecting myself, and they definitely do not own each one of my thoughts, and I'm totally fucking fine with the way the fandom has them characterized (and it doesn't bother me at all that we actually have so little information to work with), and they definitely don't keep me up at night wishing that deep platonic relationships were taken more seriously.

[v3nusxsky]

I know everyone is loving the platonic Lesso stuff but I nEED THAT WOMEN TO RAIL ME LIKE OH MY GOD. You’re platonic stuff is very comforting though. Truly appreciate it.

Hey lovely anon! I hope this is sufficient if not feel free to send another ask in and I’ll attempt it again :)

play thing| NSFW

*Authors note~ I have a few requests waiting to be written I will write them guys it’s just a few personal things stopping me writing as much as I wish to*

Trigger warnings~ sub r dom lesso, pet play? Oral, toys, restraints r, self pleasure l, overstimulation, lesso called ma'am

Prompt~ tumblr Anon~ I know everyone is loving the platonic Lesso stuff but I nEED THAT WOMEN TO RAIL ME LIKE OH MY GOD. You're platonic stuff is very comforting though. Truly appreciate it.

☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾

You knew what would happen when you entered this arrangement. Of course you did. Yet you still couldn't stop yourself from agreeing to it. Lady Lesso being the irresistible women is knew just how to push your buttons. She knew just what to say, the sway to add to her hips and even the right stance to take on. Everything about the women all pointed to one word. Irresistible. That's why when you joined the staff you were shocked to hear that she was single. A women with this much beauty surly would be snapped up? Apparently not in her case. You heard the rumours of Rafal, how he treated her so poorly and shattered her heart leaving it irreparable.

That's why you couldn't be surprised at the fact this was a simple arrangement. No strings. And truthfully your heart yearned for more, to hold her close and try to fix her heart. But you knew that lesso didn't feel the same. It was more of a friends with benefits situation for her. So you tried to push down your feelings for the women and be happy with whatever Lesso is willing to provide. Which is why lead you to being in an agreement with the Dean of Evil and subsequently falling deeper in love with her.

Recently the Dean had become rather stressed with the upcoming test between good and evil. You knew this of course so it was no surprise to you that you that the play time had increased as the weeks progressed. At this point it was becoming a daily occurrence. You would wake up deliciously sore from the night before, teach your students in the school for Good their defence class and then would head back to your office to complete paperwork. And then that is where you would be interrupted by the Dean. Sometimes she would be so stressed you never even made it out of your office, others you were taken to the Doom room and on the odd occasion you even ended up in Lady Lesso's quarters. Each day you never knew what mood she would be in, never knew what would happen but that was all part of the game.

Lady Lesso liked to taunt her pets. Simply a play toy for her to use as and when she deemed fit. That was made clear to all that entered this agreement. Yet with you it was some how different from what you'd been told to expect. Rules had been established alongside any limits being discussed, after all this was all for the fun and pleasure of both parties. Lesso truly had no desire to seriously hurt you in any shape or form. Which is why you were not shocked to be dragged into her quarters by her guards.

You were instantly thrown onto your knees in front of her desk, immediately taking your submissive position and tilting your head towards the ground. Just as she had taught you. The women sat at her desk seemed uh phased by your arrival and choose to simply ignore your presence in general. She knew that the wait was something you enjoyed, it allowed you to let your mind wonder what could possibly be in store for you. So far the longest you had been left is ten minutes maximum but tonight it seemed that Lesso was setting a new record. Your knees were beginning to ache, the tights that clung to your legs beginning to irritate your knees yet you didn't dare even move a centimetre. You didn't even lift your graze to rake over her form, after all you truly preferred to receive her rewards rather than her punishments. It was her coming to stand in front of you that got your attention.

A hand cupping your chin tilting your head upwards to meet her lustful gaze. "Now pet remind me, what's your safe word?" She husked out taken in just how desperate you looked. "Nova" you mumbled earning a pleased hum from the older women. "Be a good Pup and go sit pretty on the bed for me" she commanded and you were left dumbfounded at the name. Not something you had experienced yet you oddly enough didn't hate it. It was the sharp tsk of her tongue that had you up in a flustered hurry. You sat on the edge of her bed and she couldn't help but hum in disappointment that you hadn't found your original position. "On your knees pup" she demanded and you complied instantly. Desperate to serve and please her.

Despite the things you heard, Lesso was a considerably slow and patient lover. She took time in learning your queues and tales. Loving how she knew the spots that would drive you absolutely wild for her. The spots that were just enough to tease you and if you had teetered on the edge of realise long enough a simple bite to your collarbone was enough to force you into the blissed out high. Lesso loved to switch it up so you couldn't predict what she would do with you next.

Tonight she opened to feast on you. When had you lost your clothing? Nestled in between your legs lapping up the slick drenching your core. Instantly her stress started to fade away hearing the sinful sounds she could pull from you. Good and Evil shouldn't mingle and you knew that. But you both also knew how sweet the forbidden fruit was. And that's how you found yourself on the edge of climax while Lesso licked and sucked at your aching core. You couldn't help but whimper when she moved just in time to prevent the pleasure from cursing through your body.

"Ma'am please" you whined out trying to get your mind to focus and remember the rules you had been taught. It was the chuckle that your lover let out that caused a shiver to run down your body. Immediately you were blinded by the familiar orange silks that were specifically used for this activity. Next your limbs expertly bound to the bed. Causing you to whine in need. "Oh such a need little Pup for me aren't you?" She taunted and began to strip off her clothing, watching as you withered in anticipation.

The silence in the room was deafening until a click of the button and a constant buzzing noise took its place. It was only then that you felt her position the toy perfectly against your core. Your moans instantly began to fill the room as it created waves of pleasure. The sight to sinfully delicious that soon enough your moans weren't the only ones flying around the room. Your mind was hazy due to the toy working diligently between your legs. Although pleasurable not enough to throw you into the pools of pleasure. You knew that and so did Lesso, which is why lesso had now sat herself in a chair with a direct view of your soaking core. You were now drenching her sheets with arousal unable to do anything but whimper and mewl uncontrollably for her. Quickly growing overly sensitive at the toys constant assault. Blinded and restrained all you could do was listen out as she brought herself to the edge at the sight in front of her.

The straw that broke you was when she finally tumbled over the edge praising you as she came.  That mixed with the toy still working on your core had you pleading with the women. The blind fold was swiftly removed and she was instantly met with your eyes full of desire. Need. Want. Lust. It was a delicious combination and one she thoroughly enjoyed being the cause of. You were completely out of my, only one thing on your mind, your need to climax and you weren't above doing just about anything to get it. So when Lesso situated herself on your stomach, her very own drenched core soaking the skin there and husked out "open pup" you couldn't help but instantly respond. Your tongue swirling around her slender digits making sure to get every drop of her essence and savouring it.

The toy was shut off and removed causing you to cry out. Your words incoherent as you begged and pleaded for her to give you what you so desperately needed. Only this time her fingers slid into your soaked pussy creating the sounds of wetness as she thrusted them in and out. You were thrashing wildly desperately chasing that high you had been denied so many times. It was bordering on painful when Lesso brought you over the edge in an earth shattering orgasm. She slowed her efforts in an attempt to drag out your high as long as she possibly could.

You were completely out of it. Your head empty as you enjoyed the pure bliss you were experiencing. How long had you been in this state? You weren't sure but you were sure you never wanted to leave. It was Leonora's voice that broke your sub space and guided you back to her. Despite being the Dean of Evil she gave the best after care you had ever experienced. Always so attentive and caring making sure you were safe and cared for. You couldn't help but fall for the women ever more than you already had. Once again the red head settled between your thighs this time with a warm wash cloth intending to clean you up so you were comfortable. Your body trying to automatically inch away from her, unable to handle any more stimulation. "Shhh hush pup I'm just gonna clean you up" she reassured pulling your legs gently toward her and wiping the cloth gently, ensuring she got everything for you. After ditching the cloth she joined you on the bed. This was new not something you were expecting and you most certainly didn't expect her to gather you in her arms and whisper "be mine pup not just a play thing but mine?" You couldn't actually believe your ears, still stuck in your own mind. You had to have had imagined it right? But you nodded anyway and snuggled into her embrace.

Word count~ 1771

[burningdarkfire]

nearly just hit the unfollow button instead of the ask button . N, R, & U?

awww thank you for the ask (and not unfollowing!) 💕

N - Name three things you wish you saw more or in your main fandom (or a fandom of choice)

N really is my lucky letter because i've gotten it three times thus far so your theme is going to be really specific wants i have about my little guy caleb widogast:

moooore blumendrei; the wizards definitely do have a small and loyal fanbase that i am very happy to be a part of, and also this fanbase is always welcoming new blood 🤗 i think caleb as a character is haunted so much by his past, it's odd to me that so many of his fans don't contend much with it directly

caleb actually being a middle-aged man and everything that entails; i don't think the fandom is really that bad about randomly twink-ifying him or anything, but i do feel like we could often be a little more specific in describing his body, and also i feel like hardly anybody ever deals with what it must feel like to finally have a life again for the first time since you were 17 and now you're like 34. i mean happens to all of us but i do want to read more of it

shadowgast breakup taken seriously; this is very specific because i was spinning ideas for it today but i really do want to read a fic where caleb and essek break up on purpose and it is not actually a grand misunderstanding where if only they had clarified that they still love each other it would all be fixed!

R - Which friendship/platonic relationship is your favorite in fandom?

my hobby is staying up late blurring the already non-existent line between platonic/romantic/sexual relationships so i don't have a real answer for this! and tbh the more i think about it, the more i realize that there are very few "strictly platonic" relationships in critrole that compel me - it's often the mess that makes them attractive

outside critrole my default answer would probably be campal from the locked tomb series, but i would go on record saying that they're the ideal platonic relationship and i think they become very slightly more interesting if we assume there was a sexual component involved

U - Three favorite characters from three different fandoms, and why they’re your favorites

well we all know who number one is going to be

caleb widogast; you were not born with venom in your veins, you learned it!! you learned it!!!!! it's actually almost ridiculous to look back in time at the person i was four years ago before i knew that this fictional character was going to save me. i was a shitty teenager and i hurt a lot of people and i'm going to carry that with me forever! but also maybe there is still a life for me even after all of that! and also he has beautiful hair and unmatched hubris

iron man; i've been casually dipping back into the mcu so thinking about him again and unsurprisingly i'm also here for the unrelenting guilt and incalculable hubris (with bonus daddy issues!) but part of what i like about tony stark so much is that he takes all of his personal problems and makes it the whole world's problems. the whole universe's problems. and i just think that's fascinating

cersei lannister; every single hotd thought i've had this year has inched me ever so slightly closer to reading got again, because sometimes i'm reading fic about women in horrible situationships and thinking about how i could just be reading about cersei instead. like unfortunately tywin lannister's trueborn son and heir was born a girl and she proceeded to make that everybody else's problem as well, and in this way, we are sisters

(send me an alphabet fandom ask!)

[baileypie-writes]

Hello saw you were taking requests so here is mines

Plantonic Regina and Knight Gn! Reader (possibly evil precure)

The reader is A young knight for the kingdom like Makoto before it gotten taken over but king selfish found potenial usefulness out of reader so found A way to brainwash them and made them A knight for Regina and they eventually grow closer and seeing how King selfish is kinda manipulating Regina and how she truly wants to do good but keeps getting dragged to darkness Reader sticks by Regina side even after the brainwashing wears off

I’m down for headcanons or A one shot whatever you want to write (also low key I’m still coping over Regina’s cure design I love her but I seriously don’t like it)

A/N ~ Sure! That’s a very cool plot! I’m also glad you agree on my opinion of her design haha! I hope I interpreted your request accurately. Apologies if I didn’t! Hope you enjoy!

~By Your Side~

Regina + GN!Evil!Knight!Reader

~~~🎀~~~🎀~~~🎀~~~

Fandom: DokiDoki! Precure

Fanfic Type: Oneshot

Reader: Gender neutral, Regina’s knight

Relationship: Platonic

Genre: Hurt/comfort

Rating: PG

Synopsis: After Regina was brainwashed by her father, you slowly watched her old self come back. You also realized where her true happiness lies, and that you’d do anything to help her achieve it.

Warnings: Mentions of brainwashing

~Masterlists~

~DokiDoki! Precure Masterlist~

‼️Glitter Force stans DNI‼️

~~~🎀~~~🎀~~~🎀~~~

The majority of your life is a just huge chunk of blank space and memory. You don’t remember a thing from before about a year ago. All you know is what you’ve experienced since gaining consciousness. You’ve only had one job since then; protect the Princess. So you followed the task King Jikochuu had given you.

Though you try your best to act professional, Regina seems to treat you more like a friend than a protector. No matter how many times you remind her of your actual job, she still sees you following her around as ‘hanging out’. But you guess it’s fine, just as long as she’s happy.

As your duty states, you must take care of Regina, and keep her safe. But what should you do when you start to consider that the one who gave you the order could be the danger?

~~~~

You made a promise to yourself that no matter what path Regina chose, you’d stick by her side no matter what. So when she started to become closer to the Pretty Cure, you prepared yourself to follow her to the good side. It was a change you were fine with making, just as long as the princess was happy. Additionally, the Pretty Cure were very nice girls who truly brought out the best in her.

When she ultimately decided to talk to her father about turning good, you encouraged her; cheering her on.

Nothing could’ve prepared you for the outcome.

She was different. So horribly different. The sweet, silly child you once knew was gone. In its place was a cruel, sinister girl. You hated what her father did to her, but you couldn’t do anything besides stand and watch.

Regina treated you differently as well. Instead of just a friend, you were her partner in crime. She expected you to join in on her horrid shenanigans. And she also expected you to enjoy them. You were all for a little mischief, but this new version of Regina was hard for you to watch.

But even with the terrible change, there was still a faint light in her heart. You could tell. From the way she interacted with the girls, you knew she felt it, deep down. A quiet, almost silent wish for a friendship with them. A wish to join them.

The only thing that stood in the way of her achieving her dream was her father. Each time she nearly had the ability and courage to switch to the good side in her grasp, King Jikochuu dragged her back down into the pit of selfishness. And frankly, you hated it. It was your duty to keep Regina safe and happy; a duty given to you by your boss. But it was your boss himself that was the barricade between his own daughter and her true happiness.

But you couldn’t do anything. You could only give your support. Or… was that still something?

~~~~

Regina laid on her stomach, on her cushy sofa. Her feet kicked in the air out of frustration, and her head rested on her arms, which were crossed in front of her. She wore a dramatic pout on her face, which was half concealed by her arms. But you could clearly see her furrowed brows.

“What’s the matter, Regina?” You inquired. But you knew the answer. She had just gotten back from spending time with the Pretty Cure. It seemed that her genuine enjoyment caused her confusion and frustration.

“Nothin’.” She huffed out, her voice muffled from her mouth being covered by her arms.

You hummed, and let her be. But you couldn’t help but smirk, as you knew what was coming. Every time she used that response, she would tell you exactly what was wrong just a moment later.

You counted down the seconds in your head. Three… two… one.

“I just don’t get Mana! Why is she so nice to me?” And there it was, right on time, as always.

“Because she sees you as her friend.” You answered her question, hiding the satisfaction you felt from your accurate prediction.

“But why?” She whined, sitting up and crossing her legs. “I’m King Jikochuu’s daughter! She should hate me, just like Rikka and Makoto!” She pouted once again, crossing her arms to match with her legs.

“That’s just how Mana is, I guess.” You chuckled. “She sees the good in people.”

“But I don’t have any good in me!” Regina declared, as if it was common knowledge.

“That’s not true.” You replied. “You have a lot of good things about you.”

Her head snapped in your direction. She looked at you as if you were mad. “What?”

“Well,” You began to specify. “You may be naughty, but you really do care about others. You’re exciting and fun to be around. And you’re affectionate to those you love.”

Regina’s lips curled into a smile, and she burst out laughing. “Ha! I think spending all that time with the Pretty Cure might be going to your head, (name)! I mean, I am fun. But I don’t care about anyone!”

“So you don’t care about me? Or your father?”

She went silent. “W-well, that’s different! Daddy’s my, well, Dad!” She stuttered. “And you’re my best friend!”

“And what about Mana? You don’t care about her?” You pried further.

It looked like you had just offended her. “No! I-“ She began defending herself, but she went silent once again. You watched her eyes. You could almost see all the thoughts rushing in her mind through them. It reminded you of a saying you’ve heard somewhere: ‘Eyes are the windows to the soul’. You thought that was ridiculous before, but now, you thought of it as genius.

“Regina”. You interrupted her thinking. “I want you to know this.” Stepping over to her, you took a seat next to her on the sofa. “It’s my job to look after you, and to keep you safe and happy.” You placed a comforting hand on her head, just on top of her big red bow. “So no matter what you choose to be, I’ll be right here with you.”

Regina choked up a bit. “B-but what about Dad?” She looked genuinely scared, as if that one decision could lead to terrible things if she chose wrong. And you weren’t sure if that belief was entirely false. Seeing what her father had done to her in the past, you knew there was an array of other options on the table. He simply brainwashed her last time. He could do it again. Or maybe something way worse. Something that gave no chance of the old Regina ever coming back. But for her, you’d do anything to make her wish come true. Even fight her father.

“I can’t say what’ll happen. But I can say that I’ll be by your side the whole time. No matter what happens, I’ll be there. I’ll protect you the very best I can. Even if it means going against the King.”

Tears welled up in Regina’s eyes. She head butted your chest, and just cried softly. You placed a hand on her back, rubbing it slowly to comfort her.

You knew the journey ahead was not going to be easy. But what kind of knight’s job was? If it’s all for the sake of protecting Regina, then you’d face it head on. Even if the danger’s head was fifty times bigger than your own body.

~~~🎀~~~🎀~~~🎀~~~

~~baileypie-writes

[sol-draws-sometimes]

Unrelated to this episode but as a twin, everytime I remember Lark had an affair with Sparrow’s wife, I’m just… in disbelief. Like, I hate when people ogle at my twin and I, and are like “WHAT’S IT LIKE BEING A TWIN!” “I WISH I WAS A TWIN!” “WOW! HAVING A TWIN IS HAVING A BUILT IN BESTFRIEND!” However, weird objectification aside, they’re not wrong. I DO have a close bond with twin that I don’t with anyone else. For most of my life (and all my childhood), we were on the same wavelength emotionally speaking. Obviously we had put diffrences, but the way we viewed the world and reacted to things emotionally was almost the same. In middle school, we both were struggling mentally, but we understood each other, she felt like the only irl person who truly understood what I was going through, because she was going through it too. To me, our relationship is taken for granted. No matter what happens, how much we fight or bicker, I have never once in my life doubted whether she loved me or not. Her love has always been, and still is, the strongest constant in my life. And even though the way we view the world and act emotionally is no longer exactly the same, she is still the one person I feel understands me the most.

And that’s why, I can’t wrap my head around the fact that Lark did that. How could he have done that. I could NEVER, see myself betray my sister like that. And yes I’m young, and ace (and on the aro spec), so you could argue it’s not the same but like, even if I were allo, I just, can not see myself having an affair WITH MY TWIN’S S.O.! (also I just hate the idea that cheating is just a thing that happens sometimes like, I’m sure there are relationships that recover from that, but come one, seriously it’s so easy to not cheat) The worst part is that I still think Lark loves Sparrow. Scratch that, I know he still loves Sparrow. I’m not good at wording it, but the best example I can think of, is Lark pretending to be Sparrow so that he could fix Sparrow’s relationship with Normal, so that Sparrow doesn’t have a bad relationship with their son. I’m thinking of that person who made a post about how Lark shows love and I wish I could remember so that can point to that, but it mentioned Lark sewing bulletproof into Normal’s suit. Anyway, Lark LOVES Sparrow, and they are each other’s world. The problem is that they’re codependent with each other, which can make them enable their worst attributes, or let them brush things off that shouldn’t be brushed off.

I can’t imagine doing what Lark did to Sparrow, to my sister. Idk how my sister could EVER forgive such a betrayal. I know some romantic couples can genuinely work together to overcome an affair, so I guess that can be applied to platonic and familial situations as well. But still, Sparrow TRUSTED Lark more than anyone else in his life, for Lark to break that that trust, it just… idk. Also, I definitely understand why Sparrow forgave Lark, they can’t lose their only family left. They are each other’s world. Especially after everything they’ve gone through. Tho I will say, I don’t think Sparrow’s just completely over it either. His wife and brother had a fucking affair together. That has to hurt. Plus, there are little lines when referring to Normal that Sparrow’s said that leads me to believe that Sparrow has some unprocessed feelings about the affair pushed deep, deep down to keep peace.

I wonder how much thought Anthony put into to that plot point. Most of the times it’s played as joke but if you think about it for 2 seconds it’s so fucked. But Anthony cares too much about the kiddads for me to believe it was just a joke, like the Hermie’s dads situation. I wonder what made him think this is a thing Lark would do.

This isn’t supposed to be an “I HATE LARK” post. I think he’s a very interesting character, the way he’s reacting and processing to everything that happened in S1 and S2 is fascinating. And just to reiterate, I know he still loves Sparrow. But still, I keep thinking about how do you betray the person who’s your whole world, who you arguably love the most. Or guess, my real question is WHY. What has going on in his head that led him to doing that. Even from a more selfish standpoint, I don’t think Sparrow currently trusts, or will ever trust Lark the way he did pre-affair. And I don’t think Lark is stupid enough to believe having an affair with Sparrow’s wife wouldn’t irrevocably change their relationship.

I wish I could be more eloquent, but I always forget and every time I remember what he did I just don’t know how to feel about it. Idk, I just keep thinking about them. I can’t help it, I’m a latino twin, they were handcrafted for me.

If you have any thoughts on this, PLEASE DO SHARE THEM WITH THEM WITH ME. (also idk if this conversation’s already been had but I haven’t engaged)

Ps: something, something Lark hates himself so much he tries to ruin his relationship with Sparrow because he feels like he doesn’t deserve love, not even from Sparrow. Yah started thinking about it outside my perspective. I can see that being his reasoning, but still…I just, I can’t image actual doing that. But yah, I think I’m satisfied with that reasoning.

[tapwater118]

yeah no i find coinpin so interesting to talk about, and i actually really enjoy seeing other people's takes on their relationship dynamics, as it's surprisingly varied from person to person, or at least what ive heard from a buncha people i know. you can play around with them so much and i find that awesome, really. im kinda weird with using this term in a non-romantic context, but really, coiny and pin are basically the closest thing to soulmates there is in all of the bfdi friendships we have seen so far

heres my coinpin yapping: im waay more of a fan of platonic/at max queerplatonic coinpin bc of personal headcanons and stuff [im a lesbian pin fictionkin] i actually DIDNT mind romantic coinpin i just wished the majority of shippers didn't keep saying it's canon/"confirmed" and/or inherently perceive all of their interactions ever as solely romantic [if it isnt clear im arospec too LMAO😭]. both of them are extremely interesting objects and i love studying them under a microscope like itty bitty bugs

i feel that first paragraph on a personal level. you get it. i feel that in my soul (i hope i’m part of “other people’s takes”… /lh)

also yeah completely get it with the headcanon thing. there was this one post on occasionally coinpin a while back where i mentioned that eraserdrop was my least favorite ship (at least at that time, i think it might be something else now idk) and that i like my tacoblock platonic. its not really that i hate them, moreso my headcanons of lesbian td and taco take precedence (definitely not the level of personal as being a fictkin for either but still)

(also as an arospec myself i totally get it. every time a new episode comes out and two characters interact for the first time and people immediately start christening it a romantic ship i put my head in my hands (cough cough tpot 12 eraserbottle cough cough /not targeted))

and yeah if you ever see me making a “confirmed canon” post it is almost certainly not to be taken seriously. no ship is ever going to get confirmed in the show and the most anyone is going to get is the huang twins making vague comments in some q&a. i’ve taken this to heart already

but yeah coinpin lives in my brain like parasite. eternal brain worms over them in all capacity

in summary: this bfdi shit is serious be prepared to die for it

[jentledaisies]

NOW LOADING. . . YOU'RE AFFECTIONATE WITH THEM

[ gif by @bscenez ]

✎ in which you finally find the comfort they promised OR you find yourself accepting their love after fighting for so long

Warnings .ᐟ ⤷ Stockholm Syndrom, Emotional Manipulation, Obsessive behavior, curse words, mentions of attempted SA (not graphic)

disclaimer: This is not in any way shape or form a representation of Jisoo, Jennie, Rosè, Lisa, or Blackpink as a whole. All reactions, actions, thoughts, words, and general emotions are fiction and created by me. The behavior shown in these reactions is toxic and unhealthy but fantasized romantically for simply that, fantasy. None of this should be taken seriously or sought after in real life, or performed. please do not romanticize this behavior/mindset in real life as it is unhealthy and toxic, and if you or anyone you know is in such an environment, should be taken out of it immediately. Again, this blog is purely fiction, and all acts taken place in this blog should remain so. ↳ None of my characters, yandere or otherwise, will ever nor would ever perform, act, or consider sexual activities of any sort without consent. full stop. Any and all sexual acts are done with the full consent of all parties taking place. i will never, ever, ever write otherwise or even consider writing otherwise.

It was crazy, you knew that. M/N had kidnapped you, stolen you away from your family, friends, life. She had imprisoned you in a golden gilded cage to be her lovely pet. You were hers, and yet, you had no choice in the matter. Of course, she made sure you knew, she was yours too, she didn't bring you here to just play and then discard you. No, she brought you here to 'give you the stunning life you deserve, by my side.' She never treated you unkindly, made sure to give you your space, and let you get used to the luxury penthouse the two of you were in. She was frustratingly understanding of your fear, of how wary you were, and made sure to never push your boundaries. She'd announce herself before entering any room, she'd never touch you, even in a platonic casual way, without asking you first. She gave you a separate room, albeit right next to hers, but made sure to never infringe on your privacy. It was so clear that her being so close yet so far away from you was killing her, and that your stubbornness would get to her at times, but she never treated you with anything but the gentlest love.

Maybe it was crazy, but you found yourself wishing to be with M/N whenever they were gone. When she would leave you would miss her, and when she was here you would crave her touch. You knew she was trying to respect your space, and you grew more and more attracted to how she cared for you. You liked her, and you were ready to accept your new life, which wasn't so bad.

[KIM JISOO]

[ gif by @bscenez ]

The sound of the front door opening was what grabbed your attention from the book you were reading. You looked up to see Jisoo entering the apartment, her leather jacket wrapped tightly around her shirt, but bits of crimson could be seen staining the edges.

"Darling, I'm home! Let me wash up really quick then we can eat dinner! Would you mind setting it up?" She called over her shoulder as she rushed up the stairs to her room, hardly looking back. She rushes into the room, practically slamming the door closed.

This was something else as well, she always made sure to never bring her work home to you. She could come up drenched in blood, and you'd never know if it was hers or someone else's but she'd never even acknowledged it. She'd worked so hard to keep you away from her job in the mafia, and yet as you grew fonder of her you found yourself growing concerned about whether or not she was okay.

You're setting the bowls of rice down when Jisoo rushes down the stairs, in a comfy hoodie that seemed to swallow her small form and leggings. Wordlessly she grabs the chopsticks and starts arranging them on the table as well.

"What did Mi-rae make today?" She asked as she watched you place a large covered dish down in the middle of the table before arranging the side dishes around it.

"Oh, I actually sent Mi-rae Unnie away today. I wanted to make dinner for you myself today." You responded quite bashfully, and Jisoo looked shocked but sat down nevertheless.

"What did you make, Darling? It smells amazing." She asks after a minute of hesitation.

"Ah, I made *Nakji Bokkeum from a recipe I learned from my mother when I was younger." You sat down across from her and took the lid off the savory food. A nervous feeling bubbled in your chest as the special memory was picked up by her and slowly entered her mouth for her to taste. She lets out a groan in satisfaction before shooting you a happy smile. It falls however when she realizes you're not eating at all.

"Darling, is something wrong?" She slowly swallows before placing her chopsticks down, waiting for you to speak.

"...When I was younger and my mother would make Nakji, it was always special. It was my father's favorite dish since he didn't grow up with much so we only made it when we had special announcements or events. It may seem stupid, it's such a common dish but it holds a lot of meaning to me." You raise your eyes to hers to see her watching you curiously, drinking in every word you were saying.

"What are we celebrating, Darling?"

"...You've made it clear, the reason you took me is that you want to love me-"

"I do love you."

"...You took me because you love me and yet, never in all this time, have you tried to force your love on me. Y-You've respected me and validated my wary emotions. You've given me the distance and space I need, and you've never once become angry or impatient with my hesitance. And I found myself, growing fond of you for this. And soon I found myself hating this distance. It's fucked up, you stole my life away from me. But I think..." You trailed off unsure how to continue.

"What do you think?" Jisoo seemed to be holding her breath as she waited for you to finish what you were saying. You stood up and waited patiently as she mirrored your actions. Taking a couple steps forwards you reached your hands up before wrapping them softly around her neck as her breath hitches. The hug is light, as it's only your arms wrapped around her, unsure if this was ok. Her arms wrap around your torso after her initial shock, tugging you closer to her until you were both enveloped in one another's warm embrace.

"I think...I don't love you. But I do like you. And I'm ready to accept this, accept you. If you'll have me, I'm ready to try."

A sigh of happy relief comes from Jisoo as she pulls you impossibly closer. "Of course, I'll have you, darling. I'll always be ready to be the one to hold you. You may not love me yet but thank you for agreeing to give us a try. You'll love me soon enough."

*Nakji Bokkeum: spicy stir-fried octopus, usually eaten with side dishes and soju.

[KIM JENNIE]

[ gif by @sunmiyah ]

You didn't know what to make of Kim Jennie at first. When you woke up to the ferocious woman from the diner waiting for you all you felt was fear, the reputation of BP and their ruthless leader was well known. Yet, instead of torturing you, instead of killing you, she treated you with the utmost love. Even when you lashed out at her she'd love you gently, cook you homemade meals that reminded you of before you were taken by your captors. She'd come back some days, injured, but she always made sure to keep that from you. She made sure to have staff around the apartment, made sure you were always taken care of like a queen, and she always told you that you were her queen. You knew she'd get frustrated and angry with her job, not that she'd ever let you see that side of her, but because you'd hear the glass of whatever alcohol she was using to numb her anger hitting the wall and shattering. You'd hear her cold voice shake in anger as she shouted at her subordinates over the phone.

It had been four months of this, and at first, all you wanted to do was scream and run. You had been saved from one captor just to be held by another. But now, all you wanted to do was help cure her wounds when she was hurt, make sure she was resting, and let them heal properly. You knew even when Lisa basically ordered her into bed rest she didn't listen most of the time, but you wanted to be there to make sure she did. To rest with her in her bed, hold her close and let her know it was ok to let her guard down. When she got angry you wanted to be there to console her. To be the one she spoke to instead of drowning in the much too-expensive alcohol. Maybe even be the one to hold her when she needed to be held.

You could distinctly remember when these thoughts and feelings truly started.

"Why are you doing this?" You had asked one day after she came back from a meeting. "I don't know anything from my old captor, I was simply held as a slave. I have no information. And if you brought me here to be your pet who warms your bed, I'll tell you exactly what I told them. You'll have to kill me before I let you use me for my body."

"That's not why you're here. You're here because you're mine and I love you." She had responded calmly.

"Oh, cut the bullshit. I don't need to be used like this if you want information. I hated them, if I had any, I'd give it to you. But I don't So stop trying to pretend and kill me or let me go."

"I said you're here because I love you. I know you don't love me yet, but that's fine, you'll love me eventually. You're mine."

"Fucking hell. I am nobodies. I wasn't theirs and I'm not yours. Why would I love another captor?"

"Why?" She questioned back mockingly with a teary laugh. "I have waited patiently for you to realize why, but since you need me to, I'll spell it out for you. I love you. I have waited patiently for four months, 12 days, and 13 hours so far. Holding myself back from spoiling you and treating you like the queen you are. I want you to fall in love with me in your own way. I-I..."

Her voice cracked as tears of frustration came out. "I just want you to love me, why can't that happen? I saw you and I immediately fell in love and I know, trust me I know, I'm not easy to love but I saw you and I knew you wouldn't be either. You and I could be amazing together. Why won't you just love me? Why won't you even try? Am I that unlovable to you?" With those sad words, she ran upstairs in tears, locking her door.

After that outburst that day, Jennie completely acted as though it never happened, but her words rang in your head like gunshots. It had been a week, and yet that question never left your mind. 'Why won't you just love me?' And honestly, you came to the conclusion that maybe, maybe you could try. She never hurt you or tried to force you to do anything. You at least owed her that. And maybe it was something you wanted as well.

You crept downstairs, your socked feet making no noise as you came upon Jennie cooking in the kitchen, her back turned to you as she stirred something in the pot while humming. You could notice her back tense as she became aware of someone else in the room, although she must've known it was you because she just keeps humming and cooking never looking back. A sharp gasp does leave her, however, when you wrap your arms around her waist from behind and press your face between her shoulder blades. Her body almost instantly relaxes into you, like the two of you were made to mold together. Neither one of you speaks for a moment, everything silent save for the breaths that leave the both of you before you speak.

"I don't think I can love you yet, but I think I'm ready to accept your love for me."

[PARK CHAEYOUNG / ROSÉ]

[ gif by @laalisas ]

You weren't very comfortable being touched, Chaeyoung understood that. You were wary of her, Chaeyoung understood that. You didn't want to open up and accept her affections immediately, Chaeyoung understood that. Whatever you were going through, Chaeyoung understood and gave you space. She let you acclimate, waited patiently for you to understand too. Understand that this was what was good for you, that she was what would be good for you. That she was who you were meant to be with to be happy.

At first, you were angry at her, for taking you away from the life you had. Chaeyoung understood that. She was expecting that. But you were supposed to have warmed up to her by now. It had been almost six months now. So why the fuck were you still acting this way. This was good for you, she was good for you. The life she was offering, no, giving you was much better than what you used to have.

Instead, whenever she called you sweet names, vile words would drip from you in return. When she tried to move closer to you, you'd move away, putting what seemed like miles of distance between the two of you. Whenever she'd come home wounded she was only met with your indifferent wall of silence. You were no longer angry, but this was something worse. This silence was like a thousand deafening daggers piercing her skin.

If only she knew that when she called you sweet names you just wanted to melt and bury yourself in her sweet vanilla and rose scent. Whenever she moved closer, you let yourself relax in her presence, wanting to reach out for her as well. Whenever she came home with wounds and cries of pain all you wanted was to help mend them. Kiss them better and hold her so she can cry into your shoulder. No, you were no longer angry, now you were in this weird state of not loving her but loving her love for you and wanting to love her. You felt strong affection for her, fucking hell, you liked your captor. You liked being with her, you liked how even when you didn't speak you made her happy. You liked the feeling of having someone love you.

Chaeyoung watched you from the doorway into your room as you folded laundry. "I'll let you go."

Your hands paused on the light pink fabric as you listened closely to her words. Her voice sounded defeated, and she seemed like she was going to cry.

"I thought you'd be happy with me, that I could get you to love me the way I love you. B-But I was wrong and seeing you unhappy is hurting me so bad. And I know, seeing you live a life without me, have someone else love you will kill me too, but seeing you hate me is killing me as well and if I can't be happy I at least want you to be happy..."

"I don't hate you." You cut her off, turning to see her surprised face as you continued speaking, walking closer to her. "I actually think I quite like you. I'm just so scared of that."

"Why?" Chaeyoung's voice was breathy as you drew closer.

"You took me, it feels so wrong to feel anything other than hate for you, but, I don't hate you at all. You took me, but what happens when I don't bring you joy anymore? Will you replace me? Will you even still love me?"

Chaeyoungs hands reached up to cup your face and when you didn't move away they stroked your cheeks. "You're not a toy, you're my love. Please, let me love you and prove myself worthy of your love."

You searched her eyes. "Will you hurt me?"

"Never."

"Then please, never let me go." You brought yourself into her embrace, melting into her sweet aura.

"Never, my love."

[LALISA MANOBAL / LISA]

[ gif by @intojennie ]

Lisa wasn't sure what to do. Flowers, who the fuck sent her flowers?

"Lisa-yah, I miss you <3 Come see me soon! - Myeon-Hee"

"So, I'm not the only one you took." Lisa jumped at the startling sound of your voice before turning to face you, surprised at your closeness as you read over her shoulder, a displeased frown on your face. You glare at the note and the flowers a bit more before you notice Lisa staring at you, close enough to where your breaths ghosted over one another's faces. After a second you take a step away, still within arms reach of her.

"W-What do you mean?" Lisa manages to stutter out after the initial shock of you being so close to her wore off.

"I'm not the only one you took. Do you just make it a habit to kidnap rival gang slaves?" Your voice was bitter and laced with traces of anger that took Lisa aback. But very quickly her face morphed into a cocky smirk.

"Why? Is my Baby jealous?" She watched as your face flushed and was ready to watch your adorable stuttering as you denied it, but you seemed to surprise her again.

"Of course I am! You spent all these months promising me I'm special and that you love me and it just turned out to be a lie. How many other bitches do you have waiting for you?" In any other situation, Lisa would find your fuming form adorable right now, this was the first time you were angry at her and you looked so cute. And it was because you were jealous! But what you were insinuating made her frown deeply, ready to rebut everything you were saying.

"Don't you dare fucking say that? You know you're my one and only and-"

"I mean, to think, I was actually starting to like you. I was like 'hmm, maybe she is telling me the truth, after all, she did save me, maybe I should give her a chance.' and yet all this time I'm just another girl you kidnapped to use as a toy." You didn't let her finish and continued ranting.

"Now wait a minute..." Lisa tried to stop you but you just kept going, ignoring her following you to try and stop you.

"You fucking liar! I was so fucking ready to give you a chance, to give this a chance. I was so ready to start trusting you! And you just-"

"Y/N!" Lisa finally shouted, causing you to jump in surprise before turning to face her. She was frowning with her hands on her hips. "You know damn well that I love you. If you don't by now, then that's highly concerning. Myeon-Hee is a friend from another gang, she's had a crush on me for a while but it's never turned into anything but her annoying pining. Stop trying to downgrade yourself, you aren't some 'whore' or 'toy' or 'bitch' you are the woman I love. Treat yourself with the respect you deserve."

A coy smirk returned to her face. "Now, what was it you were saying about liking me and wanting to give us a chance?"

Now it was your turn to stutter out words in surprise. "I-Um-Well, you see- That's..."

Lisa laughed before stepping forward and grabbing you by the waist drawing you close, her breath fanned over your lips and you closed your eyes.

"Do you want this? Want me?"

"Yes," you breathed, expecting a kiss. Instead, soft lips left a fluttering kiss on your head before her arms left you, and the warmth of her body faded as she stepped away from you. You opened your eyes to see her staring at you, that same look of love in her eyes that's been there since that first day in the hospital, except now it didn't look horrifying to you. It looked like something that gave you that warm happy feeling in your chest.

"Then you'll never lose me, baby, you belong to me now."

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