kickmedown

[kickmedown]

courage.

You’re leaning on the counter, sipping on that last bit of the vodka lemon filling your glass, thinking about getting another one or switching to something stronger. You’ve just swallowed the last taste of it when a certain smell just floats around you, trying to make your knees weaker than the strongest shot of alcohol ever did. You do not dare glance behind your back but he will be there in a matter of seconds and you like keeping the distance, after all. 

The bartender removes the empty glass in front of you and you're about to ask for another one when he does it first. 

“Please make two.” and takes the seat next to you. You only move your eyes to meet his gaze which is now steady on you and which is making you think you're about to have the third drink of the night, your head is lighter than it should be and it's not sounding like a good idea at all to have him that close. He licks his lips and you're mentally cursing him for doing that because the serious you is struggling to keep your eyes in his while the very much drunk side of yourself is making you look straight at his mouth. He smirks a little and you turn your head to the full glass in front of you, grateful that you now have a distraction.

“Wait, don't we make a toast?” 

“To what?” he bites his lips shrugging his shoulder, desperately trying to find a reason why you two should have one: he can actually think of many of them but none can be revealed. Not now, at least.

You roll your eyes and let your glass crush with his.

“Are you okay? You've been here all night, all alone. I would have taken this seat much sooner but..” 

“But you're a busy man and busy men do not waste their time next to someone who doesn't give them enough prestige.” you blurt out these words while largely sipping on your drink. You don't even know why you said it but it's out now and he got you well. His eyes go wide and he finally giggles a bit, not knowing how to react to such strong manners.

“Hm.. no.” 

“No? Which part of my sentence is a no? The one referring to you being a business man or..?” you're playing with fire but you've already burnt yourself and you're not feeling any pain anymore. He's now stuck between laughing out loud and grabbing you by your waist to have a closer look. But he just makes a small laugh instead and shakes his head.

“Don't know if you're being teasy or if you're just drunk af.” 

“You can consider both of them but the second one is probably taking the stage right now.” you also give a small giggle while holding the counter just to make sure you’re not landing on your face at the slightest move. He moves a leg forward, just enough to touch the back of your knee and keep you in place, not even knowing that this move can be the real knockout. You sigh and turn towards him completely, revealing your not-so-innocent neckline which now makes him struggle to hold your gaze. He wins the urge to let his eyes wander for a brief moment but when they finally fall on that very attractive detail you wonder if he's on multiple rounds of drinks as well.

“How many did you have tonight?” 

“That's the first one.” 

“Hm, did you have wine before?” he nods, gulping, thanking you for talking to him so that he can at least recollect the decency to look into your real eyes. You smile a bit and take another sip which is leading you to the bottom of the almost empty glass. You don't even need to look at it to know it since you're now feeling dizzy and you know the third one stroke, at last. You close your eyes for a moment and when you open them your sight is blurred and you're getting worried you might not make it home. He stands up and gently puts a hand on your hip, sending shivers from the top of your head to the very tip of your toes. You touch your head as if you could make it stop spinning but you can't and you feel you're loosing it. He puts the other hand on your other hip and you really want to scream to go away because he's the real struggle right now and you can't help but getting lost in it. You place your hands on his arms, just to keep enough balance not to fall, but his smell is insinuating everywhere, his warmth is radiating from his body and you're burning even if you're barely touching him. You hear him mutter something about taking you home but the last thing

you clearly remember is being carried to your couch, heart pounding and sweating your indecency out. 

Monday morning comes like a tidal wave of feelings and numbness. You are stuck between desperately wanting to see him and the urge to hide for the rest of the year. You look at the mirror and see your pale reflection as you start doing your makeup, hoping to hide the last bit of eyerings coming from the weekend. You sigh as you think of him, parking his Mercedes while you take the sight in from far, him nonchalantly stepping out of the car while greeting the other players with a soft smile. He actually is gorgeous in a way that makes your legs shiver and your heart go wild if that smile reaches you, whether intentionally or by mistake. 

When you get to the training ground his car's already there, way sooner than usual. Weird, you think, but you're weirder now since you're basically keeping track of his movements and that's not professional at all. You sigh and run up the stairs leading to your office, greeting your colleagues and the few players already there. You open the door and he's here. You pause with your hand on the handle, heart almost exploding as you spot a light smirk on his way too pretty face. 

“Are you okay?” you carefully ask, voice almost shaking which makes you clear your throat. You step forward and close the door behind your back, starting to open the curtains, acting as if this scene was normal.

“Yes.”

“It's strange seeing you here. You've never walked this door before.” he shrugs his shoulders and stars playing with a pen on your desk.

“Yes, I mean.. I thought about coming to say hi.” you pause for a moment and look at him trying to catch his gaze which he's consciously keeping out of your sight. You cross your arms and starting getting a bit frustrated.

“Okay, then. Hi. What do you want?” he notices the change in your voice and looks at you, like you hit him with a burning cigarette. 

“Wanna go out tonight? Just the two of us. If you're free, of course.” he blurts that out and you immediately feel your cheeks turning bloody red. You gulp and move your eyes away from him as if the answer was anywhere but there. You turn on your PC, moving some paper from here to there, trying not to violently smile while you give your answer.

“Sure, sounds good. Did you think of a place yet?” you dare look at him and he smiling a lot now, not even trying to hide it. He really looks happy but he doesn't know that you're way happier. 

“Not really, I mean.. “

“Would you mind going to a place I know?” he smiles even more now and you start thinking he might have a sort of paresis. Or maybe he's just trying not to laugh at you because he's telling the biggest of jokes and you immediately fell for it. You gulp and your hands are sweaty now.

“Not at all, I would like to.” 

“Alright, then..” 

“Then I'll pick you up at your place.. just let me know when.” 

“I'll text you later. But will you really be there?” he was slowly standing up but pauses to look straight at you.

“Do you think I might not?”

“Yes, I think so.” you put your elbows on the desk and slightly lean forward, holding your breath as his perfume is making you high. 

“You always say I'm an asshole which I might be but I'm not an idiot which I would be, instead, if I don't show up tonight.” he gives you a soft smirk and leaves you there. You let out a small huff, shaking your head. He will give you hard times, you already know that, and you didn't even share a glass of wine yet.